Go, Go, Meltdown

WRITTEN BY ALI SCHWEITZER

We’ve all seen it and I’m sure many of us have experienced it: The sports-induced meltdown. You know what I mean. Your child is having a great game and you are cheering loudly on the sidelines, when out of nowhere (whether in the middle of the game or at the end) there are tears and big emotions — and all we can do as parents is stand there wondering WTF just happened.

While sports have many amazing benefits for kids they can also overwhelm and cause dysregulation in their nervous systems. Maybe this is just me, but the go-go-go of today’s world seems more intense than when I was young. Kids are starting sports earlier and many are playing the same sport all year-round or doing one sport after the other without any downtime just to stay active. Sure, sports keep our kids active, help develop a sense of confidence, teach them about competition, winning and losing, and can create healthy body awareness, but rest is a much-needed counterpart to the hustle and bustle of life. The truth is we are overstimulating our kids’ nervous systems with constant activities and are overlooking the fact that, just like us, children need some downtime to do nothing.

I see this in my own kids a lot. They love being on the swimming team but there are days after practice, or after a meet, when they are an emotional wreck. They whine, they cry and may even refuse to get back in the pool. And then they often will crash and fall asleep. It doesn’t matter if they just had the best practice or a personal best in every event, they can’t focus on the good; their nervous system just takes over and they go into fight or flight mode. This overstimulation of the nervous system can eventually lead to issues with sleep, weakened immunity, bowel issues, anxiety and an inability to cope with stress. The best solution? Let our kids take a break! Now I’m not saying to let them quit in the middle of the season. I’m a firm believer that if my kid wants to try something and we commit to it, we are in it for the season. But a day off from practice is OK, and so is taking a season off.

If we are constantly taking our kid from one sport to the next just to keep them active, we are going to burn them out and see more and more meltdowns. As parents we sometimes forget what it’s like to be a kid, and we worry that if they aren’t in an activity they’ll just sit around doing nothing. Some of my best times I had as a kid — and what my children tell me is their favorite thing to do — was just hanging out with friends doing nothing, not worrying about practice or missing out on a weekend birthday party because of a game. Kids have a need for activity, but it doesn’t have to be one organized sport after another. Now if this is what your kid wants and they love being on all the teams or a team all year-round, then great. But if they start to have meltdowns or say they need a break, give it to them.

A good technique to counter those meltdowns as they happen and try to pull your kid out of a fight-or-light response is deep breathing (deep belly breaths, four-count breaths, etc.). Or if possible, get them outside for some fresh air (if it’s an indoor event). Try finding a quiet dark space for them to shut down for a moment. Try deep pressure to their elbow, knee and ankle joints. During the season, and in between seasons, consider seeing a chiropractor (this helps regulate their nervous system and stimulates the "rest and digest" part of the nervous system), doing yoga and meditation practices (also helps regulate the nervous system and calm the mind), giving a get-outof-practice for free time (this can be one time per sport or as many as you decide) and listening to your kids when they say they need a break. They can always come back for the next season, and most of the time a little break is all they need before their competitive side is ready for the next big win.

Dr. Ali Schweitzer is a chiropractor and owner of Active Family Chiropractic & Wellness. Her active kids balance sports with chiropractic care and lots of downtime, because she also enjoys the quieter moments of life.