JAN - FEB 2020
2 WeAreSandSprings.com | January 2020
SENIOR IN THE SPOTLIGHT: Jordyn Pearson
Index Letter from the Editor Dare to Leap Intro Letter from a City Official: Beau Wilson Senior in the Spotlight: Jordyn Pearson Sand Springs Calendar of Events Leap into Local Dare to Leap Photo Contest Take a Lifestyle Leap Where Are They Now? SSCT: Swingtime Canteen Leap into a Recipe Rotary Chili Cookoff Dare to Connect
4 6 7 8 12 14 16 19 20 22 25 26 27 28
How do we dare to leap into the discomfort of change when the culture around us, in its current state, repels failure? The combination of change and weakness is the lifeblood to growth and connection. The connection that we ALL want and need at our core. Yet, we refrain from sharing our true self.. the tears in the pillow, the had it up to here with my kids, the career dreaming, the I'm sorry I hurt you SELF!? There is this underlying message today that our worth is somehow tied to other people's perception of our "togetherness". This message might speak to each of us differently but it always says the same thing. That in order to create influence we should only show the best or superficial parts of ourselves. This message is so evident in the quality of our interactions whether between students, colleagues, friends, or spouses. We dread the idea that someone might see right through us. Might see our weakness, our fear, our dreams, our ignorance.. and come to the conclusion that we are a fraud and just don't have it "all together". So how? How do we risk exposure? Change is messy and will surely produce a level of failure but without change we are stagnant. I would suggest that without an awareness of our weaknesses and the willingness to change/grow we fall behind. We lose by forfeit. So how do we Dare to Leap into change and new seasons of our life and still meet the cultural expectations today? I don't think we do... at our core, we all desire for real connection. We just cannot find real connections without being our true selves. So how? My best guess, find people that love the real, dreaming, changing YOU! Love and trust them hard. Leap high and far! Tell your people when you fail, what you learned and keep leaping.
Danielle Myers Send us a letter or email: 118 N Main St Sand Springs, OK 74063 info@wearesandsprings.com 918-521-1810 4 WeAreSandSprings.com | January 2020
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February 2020| WeAreSandSprings.com 5
Dare To Leap
As one year ends and another begins, we recount the memories and experiences we’ve had and look toward January with a thrill of hope, eager to make good on the promises we’ve made for the year ahead. The year 2020 is particularly special - it’s a brand new decade, and it kicks off with a bang: it’s a leap year, giving all of us an extra day to become the people we want to be. Join us as we Dare to Leap in 2020!
6 WeAreSandSprings.com | January 2020
CITY OF SAND SPRINGS Letter by City Councilman Beau Wilson 2020 will be an exciting year for Sand Springs! This will be the year of the Census! An event that only comes around once every decade and this is a very important milestone for every community. This is an opportunity for the Federal Government to count our population and assess our growth and heath as a community. For many companies and industries that look for places to invest or expand, the census is their key guide to knowing where to place their investment dollars.
For many decades Sand Springs has been just under the magic number for growth that
would entice these companies to relocate or expand operations here.
We are hoping that the 2020 Census will be dramatically
different, but we cannot achieve the goals we want if everyone is not counted. I urge all of our citizens to take the time and fill out the census form as accurately as possible. If a census worker comes to your home, please take the time to visit with that individual. All of the information that they collect will help our city in a dramatic way, not only with increased federal dollars, but with demographic data that companies use as a measure of a communities risk for investment. Please participate in this key function of governance; it is important that all Sandites be counted and is a patriotic way to impact your community directly. Also, we have wonderful things happening all over town. In late 2020 we will see our newest investor to Sand Springs, Chick-Fil-A, open their doors. Our citizens will continue to see ongoing beautification efforts around town to enhance the appeal of our city and attract more businesses. Our High School is getting a dramatic face lift, an enhancement that will completely change the landscape of Charles Page for generations to come. Our downtown businesses continue to invest in their storefronts to make our historic downtown a shopping destination for west Tulsa County. Sand Springs is poised to enter this new decade as a phoenix out of the ashes. Our industrial footprint has shrunk and left behind building after building that needed to demolished or re-purposed, a daunting task for any municipality to deal with, let alone one our size. But, I am grateful to my fellow council colleagues, our city staff and our city manager for having a forward thinking mentality and to committing to reinvest in Sand Springs. We have so much to be grateful for as a city, not only for our rich historical past but for our bright future on the horizon. Happy New Years, and may God bless you all in 2020! - Councilor Beau Wilson
February 2020| WeAreSandSprings.com 7
Senior In The Spotlight
Our first Senior in the Spotlight for 2020 is a thirdgeneration Sandite, in the top 10% of her class, and currently plays softball for Charles Page High School. She started her schooling in Anderson but moved to Sand Springs in 7th grade and has been highly active in the community ever since. Congratulations to our Senior in the Spotlight, Jordyn Pearson. Jordyn is extremely involved with the softball team both in school and in a competitive softball team. Her position of pitcher and softball practices takes up most of her extracurricular time but she still has found time for the yearbook, work, pitching lessons, and being involved with her youth group. Overall, Jordyn has her days filled from beginning to end with school, extracurriculars and life-fulfilling activities. She is currently working at Anytime Fitness in Sand Springs, where she works out at the gym in her free time. She has been involved with the yearbook since 9th grade and is, this year, a photo editor working on all the photos in the yearbook. Jordyn started playing softball when she was 11 years old, playing both school softball and competitive 8 WeAreSandSprings.com | January 2020
softball throughout that time. She is currently on the softball team for Charles Page High School but is also a part of Team Believe. She is the pitcher for Team Believe and owes her scholarship opportunities to playing with the competitive league. However, she also states, “I love school ball, I’ve made a lot of friends.” Recently Jordyn signed with Missouri Baptist University on a softball scholarship for the fall. Her head softball coach Ken Messer-Brooks came down for the signing and has given her several tours of the school. She verbal committed last January and signed on November 13th, and has ended up with a generous scholarship for softball and her academics. She states that he has opened up his home if she is ever homesick. He is also setting up a group text this summer for all the new softball players so Jordyn can pick her roommate from a teammate she connects with. MBU is a smaller school, which Jordyn states, is one of the reasons she chose the school. She plans on going for a pre-law or criminal justice degree and wants to continue onto Law School and plans to be a defense attorney. She also is wanting to minor in Journalism or Photography to supplement her major.
Senior In The Spotlight
When we asked Jordyn why she was interested in becoming a lawyer, she said she has always been interested in the justice system and how it works. Her plan is to go to school, start in private practice and eventually run for a judgeship right here in Tulsa. Throughout her time at CPHS one of her favorite teachers has been Amy Pennington. Mrs. Pennington isn’t technically a teacher, she is the librarian and is in charge of the yearbook. Jordyn states, “I can go to her for anything I need, and she always helps me… she wrote me so many letters of recommendation and looked over my college essays because she used to be an English teacher… She’s just always been there.”
“Take every chance while you got it, don’t let it be wasted... Enjoy your time at High School while you can… don’t have any regrets.” During her precious free-time, Jordyn enjoys spending time with her friends in the High School parking lot, watching TV (her favorite show is Criminal Minds), and going window shopping. She is currently window-shopping for her future dorm room, taking pictures and planning out her dorm in the months to come. This next fall, Jordyn will be heading to St. Louis, Missouri with colder weather, no-one that she knows, and is going from living in the country to living in the city. She expects the change will be a slight culture shock. Going along with the theme of this magazine, “Dare to Leap,” she is going out into the unknown and forging her own path. She says, “take every chance while you got it, don’t let it be wasted.” As she moves onto college this fall, we wish her the best of luck. She wants to let all current students know, “Enjoy your time at High School while you can… don’t have any regrets.” Let’s all take her advice and live life without regrets, lets all Dare to Leap.
February 2020| WeAreSandSprings.com 9
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DEC 29 - JAN 5 S
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NEW YEAR'S DAY
SSPS CLASSES RETURN
MARTIN LUTHER KING DAY
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SSPS No School
SAND SPRINGS CHAMBER OF COMMERCE OPEN FORUM
21 SBI BREAKFAST At Boulder Coffee 8-9AM
7 BASKETBALL: CPHS VSJENKS
KEYSTONE ANCIENT FOREST 1ST HIKE OF THE YEAR
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28 BASKETBALL: CPHS VS MUSKOGEE Girls 6:30pm, Boys 8pm
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SAND SPRINGS CHAMBER ANNUAL BANQUET & AWARDS 6pm - Mingling & Silent Auction 7pm - Dinner & Awards
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Girls 6:30pm, Boys 8pm
From 10:30am - 12pm
BASKETBALL: CPHS VS BARTLESVILLE
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Girls 6:30pm, Boys 8pm
KEYSTONE ANCIENT FOREST OPEN HIKE
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31 BASKETBALL: CPHS VS BIXBY Away: Girls 6:30pm, Boys 8pm
From 8am - 2pm
BASKETBALL: CPHS VS POCA CITY Away: Girls 6:30pm, Boys 8pm
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14 BASKETBALL: CPHS VS BOOKER T. W. Girls 6:30pm, Boys 8pm
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COMPLIMENT DAY
25 KEYSTONE ANCIENT FOREST OPEN HIKE
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LIGHTHEART RED CROSS BLOOD DRIVE
BASKETBALL: CPHS VS BROKEN ARROW
200 E Morrow Rd. 12pm-6pm
Away: Girls 6:30pm, Boys 8pm
From 8am - 2pm
S.S Salvation Army : 5th Grade and Up Girls Volleyball Sign-ups will start Jan 16th-March 10th
Enjoy Small Business Saturday deals all year long in Sand Springs. Every 1st Saturday of the month; January 4th and February 1st. Visit wearesandsprings.com for more details. 12 WeAreSandSprings.com | January 2020
FEB 2 - FEB 8 S
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GROUNDHOG DAY
BASKETBALL: CPHS VS OWASSO Girls 6:30pm, Boys 8pm
PRESIDENTS DAY No School
MARDI GRAS CARNIVAL
__ SUPER BOWL LIV
12 LINCOLN'S BIRTHDAY
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ANNUAL ROTARY
BASKETBALL: CPHS VS BOOKER T. W.
CHILI COOK OFF
Away: Girls 6:30pm, Boys 8pm
3 SAND SPRINGS CHAMBER OF COMMERCE OPEN FORUM At Tulsa Technology Center 12-1P.M.
14 VALENTINE'S DAY
21 BASKETBALL: CPHS VS BROKEN ARROW
4 BASKETBALL: CPHS VS SAPULPA Away: Girls 6:30pm, Boys 8pm
Girls 6:30pm, Boys 8pm __ BASKETBALL: CPHS VSJENKS
7 BASKETBALL: CPHS VS UNION
Away: Girls 6:30pm, Boys 8pm
22 KEYSTONE ANCIENT FOREST OPEN HIKE From 8am - 2pm
Away: Girls 6:30pm, Boys 8pm
February 2020| WeAreSandSprings.com 13
As you might have noticed, the theme of this magazine is Dare to Leap. There have been several uses of the wording “Dare to Leap� throughout the magazine, yet the wording has a special meaning to everyone here in Sand Springs. Going into 2020 we want everyone here in Sand Springs, whether resident or visitor, to Leap into Local.
There are plenty of businesses in Sand Springs for you to L.E.A.P. into. Learning about the history of the owners, eating locally, assisting local charities, or promoting businesses in Sand Springs helps the individual business, and helps the community of Sand Springs as a whole as well. Helping the community brings more businesses to Sand Springs and encourages individuals within the community to start new businesses which create more opportunities for businesses to love! The circle goes round and round and we hope 2020 is just another opportunity for the cycle to be put into motion. 14 WeAreSandSprings.com | January 2020
Sand Springs Community Services Started by local civic clubs in 1928 before the onset of the Great Depression, the Sand Springs Community Services (originally known as the Sand Springs Welfare Association) has extended a helping hand to those in need for over 90 years. SSCS is dedicated to Assist, Connect, Empower, and Serve clients experiencing economic crises with basic needs assistance.
YellowHouse Market & Boutique YellowHouse opened its first set of doors back in October of 2016 and quickly grew into its newest location in September of 2017. YellowHouse has been a dream stirring in Lisa’s (owner) heart for some time. She wanted a place where any woman, no matter her size shape, age, ethnicity, or social standing could come spend time, try on amazing clothes, and leave feeling beautiful and confident.
Sand Springs Animal Hospital Sand Springs Small Animal Hospital offers a wide range of medical services and surgeries for dogs and cats in Sand Springs and surrounding areas. They take pride in delivering personalized, compassionate care to their patients and guardians.
Livi Lee’s Daylight Donuts Livi Lee’s (named for owner’s daughter Miss Alivia Lee) started as a dream in High School and turned into reality over the last two decades. Their first and second locations are right in the heart of Sand Springs on Broadway and in Prattville; they love what they do and being able to serve the communities they are in. These are just a few of the AMAZING businesses we have here in Sand Springs. Maybe you knew all of that about each business, maybe you didn’t; the real rub is that you can’t possibly know everything about every business here in Sand Springs. There are plenty of businesses to get passionate about and for each and every citizen to L.E.A.P. into Local within 2020, so let’s make this the year of local, let’s make this the year of Sand Springs. February 2020| WeAreSandSprings.com 15
A
s one year ends and another begins,
we
recount
the
memories and experiences
we’ve had and look toward January with a thrill of hope, eager to make good on the promises we’ve made for the year ahead. The year 2020 is particularly special — it’s a brand new decade, and it kicks off with a bang: it’s a leap year, giving all of us an extra day to become the people we want to be. When the year is still new, it’s easy to be energized by the resolutions we’ve created. In fact, each of our lives probably look drastically different than they did just two short weeks ago; there’s something about a fresh start that spurs us to action.
16 WeAreSandSprings.com | January 2020
On a smaller scale, though, the start of each month signals a new beginning, presenting us the opportunity to accomplish new tasks, follow new household budgets, begin new work projects, and plan new family events. Truly, we get the chance to start all over again each week, each day, each hour — even each minute. This revelation might feel a little intimidating, but it’s a huge sigh of relief that we can improve our habits and change our behaviors and make new goals at any moment. But why not start now?
February 2020| WeAreSandSprings.com 17
The theme for this magazine is Dare to Leap, and appropriately so. For some, this phrase will give us the ability to try something that might initially scare us, and for others, it may cause us to retreat in fear. After all, the definition of dare is to “have the courage to do something; or defy or challenge to do something.” We’re challenged to be brave this year, leaping into the changes we’ve committed to, but also by leaping into the unknown. So often we want to start something we’ve tried before, like working out throughout the week. There’s a reason the gym is packed each January; we’re all motivated by our big plans, but our dreams often give way to the realities of our days, whether that’s traveling for work or keeping up with the kiddos at home. It can be scary to start over again, and scarier still to try something we’ve never tried before. Sometimes tackling our greatest fear pushes us over the edge into the unknown, letting us leap into the brave new world of eating well or exercising often or building our savings. Embrace it!
“If you’re not living on the edge, you’re taking up too much space.” - Jim Whittaker (The first American to summit Mt. Everest) As 2020 begins, look at the thing that scares you silly, and go after it with all you have. There are thousands of self-help tips out there to help you achieve your goals, like setting milestones, announcing your plans publicly, and outlining your progress; whatever works best for you, do that. We find the quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson appropriate: “Do the thing you fear, and the death of fear is certain.” Yes, the death of fear is certain when we dare to leap into this new year and new start, diving head-first into the unknown and who we are and who we can become. Decide what you goals you want to accomplish or habits or behaviors you want to alter and watch what happens in the coming year, and the next decade, when you completely welcome the radical changes needed to make your life better — we dare you.
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February 2020| WeAreSandSprings.com 19
L.E.A.P. - This acronym stands for Lifestyle, Education, and Practice. We believe these are three keys to starting, maintaining, and mastering life changes like New Year’s Resolutions. How do we leap into a new lifestyle? With all of the New Year’s Resolutions flying around, what makes one stick and another fall flat? We believe it is a combination of three things, a change in lifestyle, consistent education, and lots of practice.
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Lifestyle - Whatever change we decide to make, whether it’s diet, exercise, or losing weight (the top three New Year’s Resolutions), the changes themselves aren’t enough. Simply adding something makes the change unsustainable. Think of life as an equation, if we add something in, we must balance the scale and take something out. When we add exercise in the morning, we subtract sleep. Know what is on both sides of the equation. Is it sustainable to get 3 hours of sleep every night because of all the things we are trying to accomplish? No. The changes that we include need to change our lifestyle. Vowing to eat better cannot be accomplished without changing our lifestyle to match, meal prepping and joining a group of common minded individuals is a must in order for eating healthier to take hold in our lives. A simple change is not a simple change, it makes ripples throughout our entire lives. Education - This piece is extremely important. Without educating ourselves continually on the process and outcome, we can never reach the end goal. Let’s take for instance working out, without the initial education of simple workouts we will get to the gym and not have a clue what to do; we end up working out on the line of machines and leave tired but feeling like we accomplished little. Continuing on with working out we cannot do the same workouts year after year, our body gets used to the workouts and plateaus. As we get further and further into our goal, the ways in which we accomplish the goal need to change, like changing the workouts in our routine. The education of self cannot only happen at the beginning of life change, but it must also happen throughout the process of change… which is always. We need to always grow, our minds expanding and actions becoming deeper and more complex.
Practice - Without continual practice, we cannot accomplish our goals. Daily we need to practice restraint and good judgment if we want to lose weight. For some goals, we need to practice day to day, while others we need to practice minute to minute. The loftier goals we set to accomplish are quite often the ones that require more intentionality to them. So often we seem to fail at one of the days or minutes, we say, “all is lost!” There is a famous saying, “Progress, not perfection,” that applies to situations like these. All is not lost when we seem to fail, progress daily is what we should be seeking, not an overnight change. And when we do fall short, there is another day and another minute around the corner. We don’t need to wait until next week or next year to start again. February 2020| WeAreSandSprings.com 21
Where are they now?
Where Are They Now? The Sand Springs Education Foundation
The Sand Springs Education Foundation began in 1989 with the goal to help the Sand Springs Schools with fundraising, grants, and encouraging community involvement. Their stated mission is as follows:
“The primary purpose of the Sand Springs Education Foundation is to serve as a private partner of the Sand Springs Public Schools, providing grants to support programs and teaching projects for which funds are not available from federal, state and local sources.”
A familiar name to those in Sand Springs, Montie Box, began the Sand Springs Education Foundation with an old fashioned “box meal” fundraiser for Sand Springs Schools. Sand Springs residents were challenged to bring supplies and cash to support Sand Springs Schools, and in exchange, they received a free chicken dinner at Charles Page High School. At the time, Montie Box presented former Superintendent Wendell Sharpton a matching $5,000 to launch the Sand Springs Education Foundation. Soon, the “Founding Donors Dinner” as it came to be known, was held to begin the supportive capital for the Foundation. The non-profit 501c3 has been collecting and distributing contributions from individuals, 22 WeAreSandSprings.com | January 2020
businesses, and organizations for the benefit of the students in the Sand Springs Public Schools ever since. The Sand Springs Education Foundation celebrated its 30th anniversary of helping Sand Springs Public Schools in 2019 and is looking for a wonderful 31st year. On September Monday, September 23rd they will be hosting the 23rd
The primary purpose of the Sand Springs Education Foundation is to serve as a private partner of the Sand Springs Public School...
2020 Hall of Fame Inductees Lisa Riggs (c/o 1978) Glenn Buntin (c/o 1970)
Where are they now?
Annual Golf Classic. The Annual Golf Classic is a fundraiser for the Education Foundation, allowing for more grants to be awarded each year. The other fundraiser they hold is the Hall of Fame Banquet. Held in April each year the Hall of Fame Banquet brings together educators, business leaders, students & community members to honor notable Sandites and raise money for the Sand Springs Education Foundation. Each of the nominees for the Hall of Fame must have spent a specific amount of time in the Sand Springs School System and are awarded individuals who have made great strides in their personal and professional life, bringing admiration to the term “Sandite.� This year there are two Inductees for the Sand Springs Education Foundation Hall of Fame, Lisa Riggs (Class of 1978) and Glenn Buntin (Class of 1970). Look for more information on each of the inductees in future issues of the We Are Sand Springs Magazine and online at WeAreSandSprings.com. The Sand Springs Education Foundation is always looking for Sandites to get involved in the Foundation and in the school system. A monetary donation is only one way to support the Sand Springs Education Foundation. You can volunteer at one of their fundraisers, donate a themed basket for the silent auction, or giving in a different capacity. For more information on donating or volunteering, check out their website at SandSpringsEducationFoundation.com.
February 2020| WeAreSandSprings.com 23
Miss Tiritas Dance & Performing Arts Studio Classes from ages 2 and up • Baby Bop • Ballet • Tap Jazz • Hip Hop• Lyrical • Voice • Piano • Musical Theater Pilates • Yoga • Aerobics • Hip Hop Abs
Now Enrolling!
www.MissTiritas.com
918.241.5637 19 West 41st Street | Sand Springs
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• Not Valid with Other Offers • Offer Expires 02-29-2020
Miss Tiritas Dance & Performing Arts Studio
WE ARE
Coupon
24 WeAreSandSprings.com | January 2020
Serving Sand Springs Since 1990
918.241.5637
After
17
years
with
MGM,
still-
glamorous movie legend Marian Ames has endured four flop films in a row and is being put out to pasture. But this is 1944 and no time for self pity. So Marian has gathered up her instrument playing gal pals from the Hollywood Canteen and headed for London to entertain the troops. Joining her are Jo Sterling, (her drum playing stand-in on 17 pictures), her skittish niece Katie Gammersflugel, solid as a rock piano playing riveter Topeka Abotelli and leggy chorine Lilly McBain.
Who: Sand Springs Community Theater What: Swingtime Canteen When: February 20, 21, 22 at 7pm & February 23 at 2:30pm Where: S.S Central 9th Grade Center Why: We wanted to provide an outlet for our community members to literally “play a part” in this exciting endeavor. Since those humble beginnings, we have successfully produced 12 seasons of theater events including a well-received Children’s Theater Workshop production. 2019 -2020 is year #13! February 2020| WeAreSandSprings.com 25
Leap into a Recipe: Hearty Hamburger Soup
As we go into 2020, you may be looking at eating a little healthier or making sure that you meal prep in advance for your week. This recipe won't take care of all your cooking needs but it's a simple recipe that makes A LOT of food for your family that will keep in the freezer if need be.
Ingredients: 2 lbs lean ground beef 1 white onion, peeled and diced 1⁄4 teaspoon ground black pepper 1⁄2 teaspoon dry oregano, more to taste 1⁄2 teaspoon dry basil, more to taste 1⁄4 teaspoon seasoning salt 1 (1 1/2 ounce) envelope onion soup mix 6 cups water, more to desired consistency
1 (8 ounce) can tomato sauce 1 tablespoon soy sauce 1 (15 ounce) can diced tomatoes, undrained 1 (15 ounce) can corn, drained 1 cup celery, sliced 1⁄4 cup celery leaves, coarsely chopped 1 cup fresh carrot, sliced 1 cup white potato, peeled and cubed garlic salt, to taste
Directions: Brown ground beef and onion in a large pot. Drain if needed. Add spices and onion soup mix. Stir in water, tomato sauce and soy sauce. Bring to a boil; then reduce heat, cover, and simmer for 15 minutes. Add the rest of the ingredients up to the potatoes bring to a boil; reduce heat, and simmer uncovered until potatoes and carrots are tender about 30 minutes. (Add more water if needed). Season to taste with garlic salt. 26 WeAreSandSprings.com | January 2020
Ed Dubie 28th Annual Chili Cookoff
Who: Rotary Club of Sand Springs What: Ed Dubie 28th Annual Chili Cookoff When: February, 28th @ 10:00am Where: Case Community Center Why: Come enjoy a great bowl of chili (or sample many) and cast a vote for your favorite for the People’s Choice Award, all while supporting the community efforts of the Rotary Club of Sand Springs. Tickets will be sold at the door and by Rotarians throughout the community!
February 2020| WeAreSandSprings.com 27
M
any New Year’s Resolutions have been made and some have been abandoned already but with the new year already in motion, the clock is ticking to make a difference in our lives. We don’t say this to put you into a frenzy, but rather to give you an appreciation for the time you spend. We are innately social creatures, we have been hardwired from the very beginning to seek each other out and are constantly and profoundly shaped by the relationships in our lives. The time we spend in the relationships that surround us is precious and should be cherished. But the truth is, it’s not always easy to make and keep these connections. We as humans have the ability to empathize and relate to one another; through communication, the exchange of emotions, ideas, and opinions is part of what makes us so unique. The bonds that we create, and are sometimes created for us, nurture a full and happy life; however, in a busy world full of distractions it can be hard to build lasting friendships in the limited time we have. In the interest of having the best 2020 possible, we wanted to put together a list… not one that has little impact, but one that might have the biggest possible impact on our daily lives and self-identity.
28 WeAreSandSprings.com | January 2020
1. Take 24 hours... and don't mention yourself.
So many times we get into conversation and get distracted by trying to relate ourselves to the other person’s story, interjecting our piece the second we get the chance. By not mentioning ourselves, not saying “I” or “me” we alleviate the need to put ourselves into the conversation. When we do this, the sole focus of the conversation becomes the other person. This allows us to focus 100% of our attention on them, and much less on ourselves, engaging in the conversation significantly more.
2. Ask someone to teach you something.
When we are being taught, we take a different stance than usual. We are learning from this person, but quite frequently we are trying to teach everyone else something that we know. We have this innate need to make ourselves useful, knowledgeable, or capable; when we put ourselves in a position to learn we take those needs away. When we strip away the “need” to be the teacher, we are able to interact on a much more personal level. Everyone had a favorite teacher in elementary school, one that we connected with more than others… this is why.
3. Leave your phone at home... and your smartwatch, and Bluetooth, and...
We need to pay attention during conversations. While this step isn’t practical in our everyday lives, we can implement this on a smaller level. Technology has had some unintentional consequences on society. There is a phenomenon called Phantom Ringing Syndrome, this is when we feel our phone buzzing in our pocket but it isn’t. Our minds have wrapped themselves around the technology we carry or wear. This takes effect even when we are engaged in conversation. Removing this obstacle allows for a deeper connection with others through conversation. Take any one of the items above and try it out. Being intentional about the connections we have and make is one of the most rewarding things we can do as human beings. However, a small word of caution, the effect being intentional about cultivating connections is great. Being vulnerable is inevitable when we make real and lasting connections, and sometimes being vulnerable is something that we try to avoid. So be encouraged and be warned, the risk is great, but the reward greater; go out and connect.
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