Family Matters March 2010 by NCNG Family Programs

FAMILY MATTERS Diane Coffill

State Family Program Director diane.coffill2@us.army.mil (919) 664-6324

SFC Calvin Buchan

March 2010 Volume 2, Issue 3

A Community of Support Awaits Take a peek inside this month’s issue for inspiring stories of those who stand ready to assist you, important information, and for programs/events/services designed to support you.

State Family Program Assistant calvin.buchan@us.army.mil (919) 664-6124

“Let others lead small lives, but not you. Let others argue over small things, but not you. Let others cry over small hurts, but not you. Let others leave their future in someone else’s hand, but not you.” Jim Rohn

SSG Ju Autry Budget Analysis ju.autry@us.army.mil (919) 664-7583

SGT Daniel Holland Human Resources Assistant dan.holland@us.army.mil (919) 664-6124

Lana Greer

State Family Assistance Coordinator

lana.m.greer@us.army.mil (828) 271-5029

The No. 1 Most Frequently Asked Question

Renee Brotherton

FAC Team Leader renee.brotherton@us.army.mil (704) 359-5736 Kathleen Flaherty, LTC (Ret.) Wing Family Program Coordinator kathleen.flaherty.ctr@ncchar.ang.af.mil

We asked several of our Family Assistance Center Specialists which are the top issues that families needed assistance with, and the answer was Tricare. We’re listening and we hope this information helps.

Which Tricare Plan?

By Kathryn Jarvis, NCNG Family Programs

(704) 398-4949

Pamela Hughes

State FRG Advisor pamela.hughes5@us.army.mil (919) 693-5016 ext. 13

Alice Dean

State Youth Coordinator alice.dean@us.army.mil (919) 664-7616 Individual Highlights Community Cares

Tricare (continued)

Military Support Groups

Events

FAC Directory

Meet the FAC

Leave Time

Puzzle Fun

Child & Youth

Volunteer Spotlight

News You Can Use

There isn’t a simple page that can answer all your questions but here is layout of three plans which may point you in the right direction. As military in the community, it is important to know how your healthcare will change throughout your servicemember’s military career. TRICARE Reserve Select is a plan offered to National Guard and Reserve servicemembers not on active and not eligible for the Federal Employees Health Benefit Program. The plan costs $47.51 a month for just the servicemember and $180.17 a month for family and servicemember coverage. There is an annual outpatient deductible based on the ranks of E-4 and below and E-5 and above. The annual deductibles start at $50 and cap at $300. With Tricare Reserve Select the plan covers a percentage of outpatient care. The patient under this plan is responsible for 15% of the negotiated rate when treated by someone in the Tricare network and must pay "20% of the TRICAREallowable charge, plus fees up to 15% above the TRICARE-allowable charge". This amount does not count your annual outpatient deductable. (continued on page 3)

FAMILY MATTERS

COMMUNITY| CARES

RED CROSS DEBUTS NEW RESOURCE FOR MILITATRY FAMILIES As part of its commitment to supporting American military personnel and their loved ones here in WNC, the Red Cross is opening a Red Cross Café at its office at 100 Edgewood Rd in Asheville, N.C. to provide a number of services for military families including: ~Computer stations for military families to email or interactive chat with their loved ones in the military. ~Families will have the opportunity to network and connect with other military families. ~One-stop access to government and other resources that military families may need. The Red Cross Café will be open one Saturday a month with its debut scheduled for Saturday, March 6th from 10am to 1pm. Refreshments will be served. In addition to the one Saturday a month, computer stations will be available from 9am to 4pm Monday, Wednesday and Friday for military families to have more flexibility in when they can contact their loved ones. Other times can be scheduled, depending on availability. For more information on the Red Cross Café or Service to the Armed Forces program, please call Debra Collington or Tony Reid at 828-258-3888 Ext 218 or 219. BE SURE TO VISIT ASHEVILLE’S NEW MILITARY FAMILY RESOURCE CENTER AT 7 YORKSHIRE ST. SUITE C., 28803 OR CALL 828.274.8571.

QUICK REFERENCE DEERS/ID Cards: 1.800.538.9552 TriCare: 1.888.363.2273, www.tricare.osd.mil Transition Assistance: Andy Jackson, 919.664.6573 American Red Cross: 877.272.7337, www.redcross.org National Suicide Prevention Hotline: 1.800.273.TALK (8255) Veteran’s Affairs (VA) The VA offers Readjustment Counseling Services for service members and their families working toward readjustment.

Helping Hands, Helping Hearts A Rose of Thanks “A Simple, Yet Powerful Way to Say Thank You to our Troops” -By Matthew Hunt After being robbed twice in 90 days at the end of 2006, I realized I was blessed to be alive and needed to do something to give back and pay it forward. While sitting in church on New Year’s Eve wondering how I was going to make a difference, right before communion, it came to me to send a Valentine’s Day card and a rose to the troops in the Gulf. Meaning of the Peach Rose: During the first days of 2007 I was looking up the meaning of what roses meant and found that the peach rose meant what “A Rose of Thanks’” message is and that is: thanks and gratitude! As I was writing a letter to American Greeting Card Co. to see if they would help print the cards or at least give me some direction. I wrote the inside of the greeting card: Thinking of you, on Valentine’s Day Wishing you a speedy and safe return home, Where ever that might be Thank you for defending The US and us!

The message (without the words “on Valentine’s Day” and switching speedy with safe), lent itself to be sent at anytime of the year. So instead of sending it for Valentine’s as originally planned, I decided to send them year-round to troops around the world. I have created other verses for the cards including ones for Joyous Holiday Season, Wounded Veterans, One where the signer can sign for their pets, One that can be given to any veteran of any era, and One that is blank on the inside that the troops can write home to friends and family. We also created a business card with a peach rose on the front. And, on the back, it has a simple message “Thank you for defending the US and us!” so that it can be given to all who have served. This is something the troops can carry with them in their wallets. I am rolling this out as a fund raiser to other non profits for example: schools, band, dance and football teams. We are partnering with other non profits to create a card for them as well. I have utilized the services of other non profits to get our cards to the troops and those include: A Million Thanks, the USO, Packages from Home, Anysoldier.com, and Send a Taste of Home. Who would have thought that “A Rose of Thanks” which started with just one idea and one card would have touched the lives of over 40,000 people in the short time we have been doing this. It has grown to where it is today by the generosity of others who have come in contact with it. I invite each of you to take the time and thank a Soldier, Sailor, Airmen, Marine, Coast Guardsmen, and our veterans for their service to our great country! Without them, we would not enjoy the freedoms we do.

Locations

Charlotte Vet Center, (704) 333-6107 Fayetteville Vet Center, (910) 488-6252 Greensboro Vet Center, (336) 333-5366 Greenville Vet Center, (252) 355-7920 Raleigh Vet Center, (919) 856-4616

A Rose of Thanks is: Art, Fun and A simple, yet powerful way to thank our troops for Defending the US and us! www.aroseofthanks.org, matthew@aroseofthanks.org PO Box 250, Newell, NC 28126, 704-754-2943

Which Tricare Plan? (continued from Page 1) To enroll in Tricare Reserve Select you must Log on to the Guard-Reserve TRICARE Reserve Select (TRS) Program Web site at https://www.dmdc.osd.mil/appj/trs/index.jsp. Select “Purchase Coverage” and you will be asked to confirm whether you are eligible for the FEHB program. You will complete the process for enrollment and add any family members you wish to be covered. When finished, you will print the DD Form 2896-1, sign it and mail it and your first month premium to the regional contractor for our Area. The regional contractor for the North Carolina National Guard is: TRICARE North Region, Health Net Federal Services, LLC TRS Enrollment, P.O. Box 870162, Surfside Beach, SC 29587-9762 1-800-555-2605, www.healthnetfederalservices.com When a servicemember is called to Active Duty, you may choose Tricare Standard or Tricare Prime or Tricare Prime Remote. One main difference between them is choosing the doctor you want to see and how much you pay. Tricare Prime Remote is a plan for families who live 50 miles or 1-hour away from a military treatment facility. With prime, you can select your primary healthcare provider or primary care manager who is in the Tricare network. If there is not one near you then you may select a ‘Tricare-authorized nonnetwork provider.’ Care for certain treatments with a specialist will require referrals. With Tricare Prime Remote, you have less flexibility as to who you see but will have less out-of-pocket expenses than with another plan such as Tricare Standard. Tricare Standard is a ‘fee for service’ plan. It is not for active duty or activated National Guard or Reserves. Some may elect to have this plan if they have a provider that is not in the Tricare network and wish to keep that provider, or if Tricare Prime is not available for you. Care with specialists do not require a referral. Although, some care may require authorization prior to your visit. You may visit a Tricare network provider or a non-network provider, however, you will be responsible for the fees and an annual deductible. Enrollment is not required. If you are in DEERS, the coverage is automatic. With Tricare Prime, you have a provider assigned to you either at a military care treatment facility or within the Tricare network. With TRICARE Prime enrollment, you have time and distance standards for care including wait times for urgent, routine and specialty care. Other benefits include enhanced vision and preventive services and travel reimbursement for some specialty care. However, the out-ofpocket expenses are less. If you receive care from a primary care manager within the network, the outpatient charge is $12 and inpatient care is $11 with a ‘$25 minimum charge’. Enrollment is required for Tricare Prime. To enroll for Tricare Prime, visit the Beneficiary Web Enrollment website at https://www.dmdc.osd.mil/appj/bwe/indexAction.do. This is only a highlight of some of the plans available. This article should not be used to make your final decision on which Tricare plan you elect to have. To get a comprehensive understanding of the different plans and to find the one best for you visit the Tricare website at http://tricare.mil/mybenefit/Download/Forms/Choices_Handbook_unlinked.pdf to download the handbook on the different plans. You can also call 1-800-555-260 or visit www.healthnetfederalservices.com

FAMILY MATTERS

COMMUNITY | CARES

Military Support Groups Military Support Groups are another option of support available to military members and their families. This month, we talked in depth with Ronna Jones, founder of Homeland Heroes, for a look inside this community-based support.

Interview with Angelena Dockery, NCNG Family Programs

Q. When did you form the support group? April, 2005 Q. Why did you form the support group? I knew a wife of a soldier, and when he deployed, there would be many hardships, that she could use help with. We wanted to support our soldiers and thought the best way to do that was to take care of their families at home as our skills allowed. We felt there were many others around us too, and started to reach out to the public to help them connect in a group. Q. Are you military-connected? I grew up as a military child until age 18, and have special friends that are military. Q. What are some of the major issues that families bring out during your meetings? Lack of good communication with their soldiers, not knowing anything about military life, feeling totally lost and not knowing where to turn, fears about their and their soldiers’ safety, sadness, overwhelmed with ALL there is to do, “alone”, exhausted and stressed, child care-discipline. Q. What do you believe are the benefits of this type of support? Consistent meetings twice a month; clear communication; feeling of belonging by being with others in the same situation; education about their issues; expert speakers; on-going support, encouragement, contacts; assist with whatever they need, even child care relief; finding a battle buddy they can talk with; someone to hug them; a shoulder to lean on and an ear to listen 24/7. Also, parents of soldiers find this group is beneficial for the same reasons and most know nothing about military so education is really helpful. By sitting in a group of like-minded people, saying what you need to, or not, and getting feedback from others reminds you, you are not alone in this difficult journey of your life. Senior adults playing with the kids helps to give mom a break. A big benefit is they feel safe and cared about here. They feel safe, knowing what they say will not cause career damage to their soldier. And, the parents of soldiers, offer help to the wives.

Q. How does it differ from FRG meetings, etc.? FRG’s are most often led by wives of the deployed soldiers and they are also stressed and time limited because they have families too. They don’t have the time we do and meetings may be fragmented. Usually they get together for social and resource reasons. Also, the families may be too far apart for some to get to. We add that personal touch they may not have time for. We have child care so the adults have a good productive meeting. Q. What are the demographics of your group? We have 60% parents of soldiers and 40% spouses, 5-8 children, most under age 5 and 3 age 6-12, and one teen occasionally. They are all in different stages of deployment, so they get good communication and tips with others that are more experienced. We have Army, NCNG, Reserves, Air Force, and Marine families. The parents often come 3-6 months prior to deployment to get prepared. Some of them travel 1-2 hours to get to the meetings. Wives with children can’t do that. Often, many of them continue to come after the soldier comes home, because of the support and education needed for the re-integration. Q. How does a typical meeting work? Does each meeting have a speaker? A topic? The meetings vary according to the needs they have requested. Typically, we are in a circle facing each other, with plenty of tissues and chocolates. I often share a “word/poem to ponder”, announcements, prayer requests absent ones have shared. Then we introduce ourselves and tell how our soldiers and we are doing. We have speakers about 8-10 times a year including a soldier that wants to share. I often teach a class after the introduction period, or we just talk … deployment, stress, depression, resources, children, communication, reunion, PTSD... whatever issue someone has shared with me that is on their heart. I never reveal names, just start the class, usually a PowerPoint, and discussions and advice, of course, starts. The slides give them something to focus on, rather than just me talking. The goal is to get them talking. I have handouts on the issues they are facing. I end with a very valuable tip for a stress buster – LAUGHTER. I show 5 minutes of funny pictures or videos to get them laughing. Then we end with a circle prayer. Everyone holds hands, and just squeezes the hand of the next person if they don’t want to say anything.

No one is ever put on the spot. This is very valuable to them, because they “hear” someone praying for them and their soldier. Then we retreat to the kitchen for snacks where they kind of pair up with someone that said something in the meeting that made them want to talk more to that person. The snack time is about 30 minutes, then we all start leaving and some of us still hang out in the parking lot 1530 more minutes talking. I love to see their interaction after the meeting, and I’ll pair them up if I know they both have the same issue and one of them has gotten past it. There are often many hugs, and they know they have found a friend. Often, before the meeting, I ask the more experienced ones to sit next to a newcomer, and if they get emotional, they get a hug, a pat on the shoulder, or arm. Of course I don’t ask them to do that. It is just compassion that triggers it. Our senior adults keep the kids, and play with them. Q. You mentioned that people keep coming even after deployment. Why do you feel so? Because they find that reintegration issues are even harder, and more stressful than the deployment. Even though, we have the class on re-integration/combat stress/PTSD before they come home. People just don’t think it will be that way with them. They have found the group “safe” and feel comfortable and willing to share almost anything. Q. How can other people, in other areas start a group? They can ask people like me, and the NCNG Family Readiness people to come talk/train them on how and what to do. But, if they don’t have someone that this is a passion for them, and committed supporters it won’t work out. The #1 challenge is finding/reaching people, and getting them to come. It takes a lot of time. You have to stick with it. Support groups’ nature is 1 or 2 people at one meeting and 10-12 at the next. Q. What do you want them to feel like when they walk away? Relieved and re-charged; hope renewed, new friends, lighter … because some of the weight has been lifted. A feeling of “I CAN DO THIS”. “I’ve got friends that’ll help me”. To learn how to start a military support group or for more information on Homeland Heroes, visit www.tribaptist.org or contact Ronna Jones at (919) 772-3482.

5 UPCOMING EVENTS | MARK YOUR CALENDAR

MARRIAGE ENRICHMENT WEEKEND RETREATS

Relationship Enhancement Programs How Not to Date a Jerk or Jerkette

“Laughing Your Way to a Better Marriage”

Single Soldier Retreats April 30 - May 2 - Beach July 30 - August 1 - Mountains

Take time for yourself to learn the tools for weeding out the ones not right for you.

Make Plans Now … Space is filling quickly … March 26-28, 2010 … Greensboro April 23-25, 2010 … Mountains May 21-23, 2010 … Mountains July 9-11, 2010 … Beach July 23-25, 2010 … Beach August 13-15, 2010 … Beach August 27-29, 2010 … Beach

Rally your single Soldier buddies and attend this all-new retreat, designed specifically for you. Sure to be both interesting and fun, you will get useful information on helping you select the right mate. Get more details online at www.nc.ngb.army.mil. Click the ‘Single Soldiers’ tab under ‘Family Programs’ or call (800) 621-4136 ext. 6124.

Upcoming Events Legal Assistance & Tax Prep Services Available April 15 is right around the corner and appointments for free tax preparation are going fast! Legal professionals will be onsite in your area this month to assist you. All you need to do is make an appointment. Legal Assistance ranges from family law, estate planning, real property, personal property, debt collection, credit issues, civilian criminal matters and tax matters. The NCNG Family Programs Legal Team, however, does not provide in-court representation. If you can’t make an appointment, please let us know in advance so that someone else can utilize the slot. Legal assistance and tax preparation services are free and confidential. Here are the dates we’ll be in your area:

March 3—Kinston Armory March 10—Wilmington Armory March 17—Greensboro Armory March 24—Charlotte Armory We also provide legal assistance and can help with your taxes at our Raleigh office Mondays, Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays by appointment only. Family Programs Legal Assistance ncnglegalassistance@hotmail.com Reita Smolka, (919) 485-9565 Chris Alderson, (919) 485-9564 130 Penmarc Drive, Suite 110 Raleigh, NC 27603

(800) 621-4136 ext. 6124

ONLINE EVENTS For a full listing of events across the State, find “Family Programs” at www.nc.ngb.army.mil, then click “Events Calendar.

March 9 & 23, 2010, 6:30 p.m. - 8 p.m. Homeland Heroes Support Group 9713 Old Stage Road, Raleigh 27603, Ronna Jones, 919.772.3482

March 12, 2010, 8 a.m. – 1 p.m. Citizen Soldier Career FairTWO LOCATIONS Charlotte Armory, 4240 West Blvd., 28208 Greensboro Armory, 110 Franklin Blvd., 27401 Searching for a job? Over 15 employers will be onsite from higher education industries to government and civilian employers. Speak with reps from ESGR, Employment Security Commission, VFW, DAV and more. Contact Donald Holmes at 704.359.5707 for more details. Light snacks and lunch provided.

March 27, 2010, 10 a.m. – 2 p.m. NCNG DoD Yellow Ribbon Event 130th ARB/D1 B 638th CS 621 EN Pre-Demob Brief This event prepares Family Members for the return of their Soldier into family and civilian life. It also points out to Family members some of the changes that they may experience once the Soldier returns from deployment and the many outreach programs and resources available to them. To register, contact James Roberson at james.roberson@us.army.mil or 919.664.7655.

April 11, 2010, 2 p.m. 30th HBCT Welcome Home Ceremony RBC Center, Raleigh

FAMILY MATTERS

Family Assistance Centers

HERE WHEN YOU NEED US

Asheville Military Family Resource Center (MFRC), 7 Yorkshire St. Suite C, 28803/Fax: (828) 274-8572 David Ponder, FAC Network Coordinator, david.ponder@us.army.mil, (828) 274-8571 Mark Woolbright, FAC Specialist, mark.woolbright@us.army.mil, (828) 274-8571 Charlotte Unit Family Contact Center (UFCC), 4240 West Blvd., 28208/Fax: (704) 359-5759 Rachel Talbott, FAC Specialist, rachel.talbott@us.army.mil, (704) 359-5756 Lynn White, FAC Specialist, lynn.white2@us.army.mil, (704) 359-5769 Fayetteville Unit Family Contact Center (UFCC), 449 East Mountain Dr., 28306/Fax: n/a Amy Wallace, FAC Specialist, amy.wallace3@us.army.mil, (910) 672-5125 Greensboro State Family Assistance Center (SFAC), 110 Franklin Blvd., 27401/Fax: (336) 691-7725 Katy Jones, FAC Network Coordinator, katy.m.jones@us.army.mil, (336) 691-7712 Sandy Harrison, FAC Specialist, sandy.harrison1@us.army.mil, (336) 691-7763 Greenville State Family Assistance Center (SFAC), 1401 N. Memorial Dr., 27834/Fax: (252) 551-6136 Henry Noble, FAC Network Coordinator, henry.noble@us.army.mil, (252) 551-5669

Dedicated Specialists On-Hand Kannapolis Military Family Resource Center (MFRC), 6001 Gateway Ctr. Dr., Suite 109, 28081/Fax: (704) 359-5759 Shane Judd, FAC Specialist, shane.judd@us.army.mil, (704) 788-4553 to Help You Navigate Doretha McLaughlin, FAC Specialist, doretha.mclaughlin1@us.army.mil, (704) 788-4554 Military Family Life ... Kinston Unit Family Contact Center (UFCC), 2875 Dobbs Farm Rd., 28504/Fax: (252) 526-2772 Call Us, Email Us or Jamie Jones, FAC Specialist, jamie.jones9@us.army.mil, (252) 526-2711 Come By. Lenoir State Family Assistance Center (SFAC), 1535 Beecher Anderson Rd., Lenoir, 28645/Fax: (828) 757-4519 Nancy Davis, FAC Network Coordinator, nancy.davis3@us.army.mil, (828) 757-4365 Frances Johnson, FAC Specialist, frances.johnson3@us.army.mil, (828) 757-4365

Raleigh Military Family Resource Center (MFRC), 130 Penmarc Dr. Suite 110, 27603/(919) 334-9966/Fax: (919) 334-9971 Chinequa Knight, FAC Network Coordinator, chinequa.knight@us.army.mil, (919) 334-9966 Lottie Anderson, FAC Specialist, lottie.anderson@us.army.mil, (919) 334-0195 Valencia Green, FAC Specialist, valencia.green@us.army.mil, (919) 334-0196 Kay Teseniar, FAC Specialist, kay.teseniar@us.army.mil, (919) 334-9957 Marci Thames, FAC Specialist, marci.thames@us.army.mil, (919) 334-0197 Earlene Capps, Administrative Assistant, earlene.capps@us.army.mil, (919) 334-9971 Smithfield Unit Family Contact Center (UFCC), 406 Hospital Rd., 27577/Fax: (919) 934-2901 Abby Millsap, FAC Specialist, abby.e.millsap@us.army.mil, (919) 934-2013 Southern Pines Unit Family Contact Center (UFCC), 500 Morganton Rd., PO Box 1317, 28387/Fax: (910) 692-3659 David Butler, FAC Specialist, david.earl.butler@us.army.mil, (910) 692-8747 Wilmington Unit Family Contact Center (UFCC), 2412 Infantry Rd., 28412/Fax: (910) 251-7130 Jim Marley, FAC Specialist, james.marley@us.army.mil, (910) 251-7195 Wilmington Military Family Resource Center (MFRC), 3114 Randall Pkwy., 28403/Fax: (910) 343-1776 Judy Howard, FAC Network Coordinator, judy.m.howard@us.army.mil, (910) 343-1775 Jamie McCormick, FAC Specialist, jamie.mccormick@us.army.mil, (910) 343-1775

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The Names Changed but the Services are Still the Same NCNG Family Programs has Family Assistance Center Specialists (FACs) dispersed in various locations throughout the state. We have renamed the FAC locations. To help familiarize families with where a FAC is the new names categorize the FACs’ location. The Unit Family Contact Center FAC is in an armory. FACs at storefronts in the community are Military Family Resource Centers and FACs in a separate facility on armory property are referred to as State Family Assistance Centers. Whether a FAC is in an armory, at a storefront or in a separate building on armory grounds, the services remain the same. We’re here to help. FACS are there for military families. They help bridge the gap between civilian life and military life. A FAC can help you with Tricare, special grants, programs, Military One Source and benefits specific for you and your family. The FAC is trained to know who to talk to when you need it most. Our Financial Consultants, Military Family Life Consultants, and legal team are just a phone call way from a FAC and you.

7 FACE TO FACE

Meet the FAC

Periodically Family Programs would like for you to "get to know" Family Programs staff throughout the state. This month we are introducing Staff from the Wilmington Area. Carol is a Registered Nurse, she obtained that through the use of her GI Bill. Her experiences with the military were a great asset during OIF II and she enlightened me greatly on the hardships of the families of deployed Soldiers. She is a great support system for me, and has been for the families of the members of the military. My name is Jamie McCormick and I am a Family Assistant Specialist out of the Wilmington FAC Storefront. I am also currently a student at the University of North Carolina at Wilmington attaining my Bachelors of Science with a concentration of Exercise Physiology. I am the child of two Army National Guard retired veterans and the sister of an active duty Special Forces Green Beret Soldier. I grew up knowing the military; its joys and sometimes its pain. I have chosen to attend college instead of enlisting like my parents. I am extremely honored to work for those who fight to protect my country. Knowing how hard it is to be a loved one waiting patiently for a soldier to return home, I feel as though the contribution that I give is the least I could do. I believe our troops are courageous, but the true bravery is shown in their family and friends.

I am James E. Marley, married to Carol, we have three children and seven grandchildren. Carol and I have lived in North Carolina since 1997. Both Carol and I are Army veterans, she was a Medic and I had many different positions in the military. I was Regular Army in the late 60's, was out for a number of years before joining the Indiana Army National Guard. After retiring from the Grant County Sheriff's Department in Grant County Indiana, we moved to North Carolina and I got an interstate transfer to the North Carolina Army National Guard with the 30th BCT. In April 1999, I was appointed to the position of Command Sergeant Major of the 1-120th Infantry Battalion (Mechanized) and served there through OIF II and until November 2005.

I get to be around people I like and get to assist them a little when there are problems. I look forward to the Family Readiness Program to continue to grow and me being a part of that growth. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to serve.

In July 2006, I retired from the Guard as I had reached the mandatory retirement age. I ended up with 28 years of service with the Military, and had over 38 years as a Law Enforcement Officer on the civilian side.

Visit www.MilitaryOneSource.com for podcasts on â&#x20AC;&#x153;Adjusting to Change.â&#x20AC;? These podcasts are designed to equip you with strategies for adapting to change. You can learn about adjusting to financial changes and/or adjusting to changes in your personal life.

After retiring totally from Law Enforcement, I worked for over a year on the SRP Team helping Soldiers prepare for deployment. In February 2009, I got the opportunity to join the Family Readiness Program as a FAC Specialist. I greatly enjoy the job as I get to be around and work with Soldiers and their families. This is the most rewarding job I could do at this time. I can remember coming back from Vietnam and, at that time, there were no programs like what is being offered now. Coming back from OIF II, the program was just starting to grow. It has come a long way and now offers so much to the Soldiers and their families.

Judy Howard ((Bio omitted: During Interviews, Judy Howard was serving on jury duty.)) Thanks for all you do, Judy!!!

Jim Marley, Jamie McCormick and Judy Howard provide support to Families and Servicemembers in and around the Wilmington region. In response to the increase in demand for family support, Jamie McCormick and Judy Howard staff the new Military Family Resource Center, located at 3114 Randall Parkway, Wilmington, NC 28403. Jim, Jamie and Judy welcome all servicemembers and their families to stop by and see what benefits or services they might be missing.

FAMILY MATTERS

DID YOU KNOW?

Taking Time Off When Your Service Member Leaves or Comes Home By Kathryn Jarvis, NCNG Family Programs

Often times it can be overwhelming for families when their loved one prepares to leave for a deployment or comes home from a deployment. When adding in the stress of daily life such as work and kids it may seem unbearable to some. One tool families can use for the transition is the Family and Medical Leave Act. The Family and Medical Leave Act is a fairly new law effective January 16, 2009, for family members with a spouse, child or parent who is in the National Guard or Reserve being called to or coming home from a deployment. Employers who have at least 50 employees within a 75 mile radius are required to allow leave for qualifying employees for certain military activities pertaining to the servicemembers’ deployment. To qualify as an employee, family members who have worked for an employer (private or public) at least 12 nonconsecutive months and have at least 1250 hours within the 12 months is allowed to take leave. Qualifying events includes military ceremonies, briefings and events such as, childcare or school activities affected by the deployment of a servicemember, counseling for the family member or the servicemember, when a loved one is home for rest and recuperation and even post-deployment activities for 90-days after the return of the servicemember. The Family and Medical Leave Act grants up to 12-weeks of leave for a yearlong deployment. The leave is either taken as paid if the family member has leave available or as leave without pay if no leave is available. In addition to the 12-weeks if a servicemember is being treated for serious injury while deployed, the military caregiver may be eligible for 26-weeks of leave paid or unpaid. As everyone knows the military loves paperwork but so do employers. Employers will ask to see the servicemembers mobilization orders for when they are leaving for a deployment and may ask for the Department of Defense 214, Certificate of Discharge, from active duty when they return. The law does require a 30-day notice or a soon as possible when the family member becomes aware of the servicemembers mobilization. Employers are required to follow this law and to provide in writing the Family Military Leave Act qualifications and designations as well as the family members obligations when using leave under this Act. If a family member is denied this benefit employees may file a grievance with the Department of Labor or if part of a union their Union Representative. EMPLOYMENT CONCERNS? Contact the National Committee for Employer Support of the Guard and Reserve (NCESGR) at 800.33.4590 or visit www.esgr.org.

Military Family Life Consultants (MFLCs) here in N.C. stand ready to assist you onsite, via email or by phone with any issues related to change. Sometimes, it’s hard to bounce back. You’re not alone. NC’s MFLCs have helped loads of military members and their families adjust to the changes in lifestyle. Better yet, they can simply lend a listening ear. Our MFLCs are experts on a range of everyday issues and can help, perhaps, offer new tools, strategies and techniques. You can also contact our Director of Psychological Health for the NCNG, Stephanie Nissen, LMHC & LPC at (919) 2578863. John Alleman Adult and Family Specialist john.b.alleman@healthnet.com (919) 745-9635 Betty Steelman Youth and Family Specialist bettys.ncmflc@gmail.com (919) 665-9178 Area Rotational MFLC's On-Call Asheville ng.mflc.lenoir@gmail.com (828) 729-0729 Charlotte ng.mflc.charlotte@gmail.com (980) 213-6458 or 6459 Greenville ng.mflc.greenville@gmail.com (252) 295-8558 Morrisville ng.mflc.morrisville@gmail.com (919) 627-4360 or 4361 Wilmington ng.mflc.wilmington@gmail.com (910) 508-6170

Financial Counselors

Need advice on paying down your debt or have questions about the new credit card laws? Want to know how to pay for college? Need help making a budget? For more information, contact one of our certified financial experts. David Porter, AFC, Certified Financial Planner (704) 280-9555 (East NC) Additional Certified Financial Planner (980) 329-8467 ncng.pfc@gmail.com

HOW MUCH DO YOU KNOW? 1

7 8

9 10 Stop Stressing. Stop Living.

TEST YOUR KNOWLEDGE OF MILITARY AND FAMILY PROGRAMS Whether you’re new to military life or been around for years, everyone can agree that there’s an acronym for nearly everything. Have fun with our crossword puzzle. Compete with a friend to see who can answer the most questions.

ACROSS 1. A Program that hosts events which provides an opportunity for your military child to join together with other Guard children, share their experiences, and make new friends. During the events, kids get a chance to learn more about military careers and what their parent does in the NCNG. 4. The acronym for the Wounded Warrior Transition Unit. This program provides critical care to wounded soldiers who needs 6 months or more medical care. 6. An important document issued by National Guard Bureau, which proves service in the National Guard. It is required to by the VA and other organizations to verify the total amount of service a servicemember served in the National Guard. 7. The acronym for State Family Assistance Center. It is where Family Assistance Center Specialists at separate buildings on armory property provide military families assistance and information on resources and benefits available to them. 8. The acronym for Military Family Life Consultants. 9. A form used to get reimbursed for traveling to a military function or job. 10. The acronym for Military Family Resource Center. It is where Family Assistance Center Specialists at community storefronts provide military families assistance and information on resources and benefits available to them. 11. How not to Date a Jerk or Jerkette is a _________ soldier seminar. The seminar teaches soldiers how to weed out the ones not right for them through programs like P.I.C.K. 12. ITO stands for (first two words). 13. A reintegration program designed for servicemembers and their families transition through different deployment phases. 14. A retreat for married military couples to strengthen their relationship. (2 Words)

(answers on next page)

DOWN 2. An important document issued by the Department of Defense, which proves a servicemembers active duty service. It is required by an organizations to verify proof of service, such as the VA, employers, retirement, and veterans organizations. 3. The acronym for Unit Family Contact Center. It is where Family Assistance Center Specialists at armories provide military families assistance and information on resources and benefits available to them. 5. A medical program available for servicemembers and families.

If you’re stumped and want to know more, page 12 will help.

Child & Youth Program 10

FAMILY MATTERS

Operation Military Kids Hot Shots Weekend March 26-27, 2010 (arrive Friday at 7pm; Depart Saturday at 4pm) Harnett County Agriculture Center, 102 Alexander Drive, Lillington Youth ages 13-18 are invited to attend this “lock-in” style event. Both military and non-military youth are encouraged to attend. Participants will enhance leadership skills by engaging in interactive sessions including public speaking, journalism and photography. Youth will also practice healthy lifestyles by preparing meals and starting the day with exercise. Creativity and selfexpression will be encouraged as youth demonstrate their ability to be community leaders. Registration Fee: $15; Deadline to register is March 19, 2010. Check or money orders should be mailed to Harnett County 4-H, PO Box 1089, Lillington, NC 27546. Fee covers event insurance, meals, activity supplies and is non-refundable.

2025 National Guard Drive, Morrisville, 27560 FAX: (919) 664-6156

Alice Dean State Youth Coordinator (919) 664-7616 alice.dean@us.army.mil

Bridgette Carroll KOG Coordinator (919) 664-7664 bridgette.carroll@us.army.mil

Kristi Wagner Youth Coordinator (919) 664-7625 kristi.wagner@us.army.mil

To register or for more information, contact Lynn Lambert, 4-H Agent, at 910.893.7532 or lynn_lambert@ncsu.edu.

REMINDERS!!! 3rd Annual NC Operation Military Kids Visual Arts Contest NC OMK is excited to announce the 3rd Annual NC Operation: Military Kids Visual Arts Contest. The contest is open to all North Carolina youth. Age categories are 5-8, 9-10, 11-12, 1315, and 16-19. Designed to introduce youth to the Visual Arts as a part of the 4-H Expressive Arts Curriculum, youth will utilize their skills and their artistry to capture their views of America and patriotism. This year's themes are: -Celebrating Military Careers; Honoring Our Heroes; and Growing Up in America Contest rules and guidelines can be found at www.nc4h.org/military/index/html. Eligibility of Photos: All visual art must have been created by youth between the dates of January 1, 2010 and the time of entry. Entry Deadline: ENTRIES must arrive in the North Carolina 4-H Youth Development Office, postmarked no later than Friday, April 30, 2010.

NEED AN EXTRA BOOST IN GRADES? HAVE QUESTIONS? NEED HOMEWORK HELP? VISIT

TUTOR.COM Servicemember does not need to be deployed to use this FREE service.

NMFA OPERATION PURPLE CAMPS North Carolina was selected to host Operation Purple Camps. Registration Opens March 15. Information about the camp program, eligibility, and camp locations is available online at www.militaryfamily.org. Specific camp information will be available when registration opens on March 15, 2010. Until then, interested families can sign up to receive email notices and announcements on the website. Camps are free to all participants thanks to support from the Sierra Club and The Sierra Club Foundation.

Answers to Crossword Puzzle: Across, 1. Kids On Guard, 4. WTU, 6. NGB-22, 7. SFAC, 8.

!!!SPACES FILL FAST!!!! MFLC, 9. 1351-2, 10. MFRC, 11. Single, 12. Invitational Travel Orders, 13. Yellow Ribbon, 14. Marriage Enrichment. Down, 2. DD-214, 3. UFCC, 5. TRICARE.

KIDS ON GUARD DATES ANNOUNCED Involve your kids in NC’s elite military kids’ program …learning, leadership, fun and support.

March 27, 2010 - KOG Day Drill 400 E. Walnut Street, Tarboro, NC 27886 April 23-25, 2010 - KOG Overnight Weekend Drill Camp Butner Training Site 539 Roberts Chapel Road, Stem, NC 27581 Sept. 24-26, 2010 - KOG Overnight Weekend Drill Camp Butner Training Site 539 Roberts Chapel Road, Stem, NC 27581 Contact Bridgette Carroll (contact info above) to register.

Spotlight on Volunteers Pamela Hughes State FRG Advisor 105 West Spring Street Oxford, 27565 (919) 693-5016

pamela.hughes5@us.army.mil

Family Readiness Support Assistants Charlotte Donald Homes donald.homes@us.army.mil (704) 359-5707 Clinton Sarah Strickland sarah.r.strickland@us.army.mil (910) 299-5466 Goldsboro Greg Smith gregory.paul.smith@us.army.mil (919) 739-5319 Jacksonville Judy Richardson judy.r.richardson@us.army.mil (910) 347-4352/line 11 Morrisville Jim Roberson james.roberson@us.army.mil (919) 664-7655

Volunteer Award Nominations Deadline for submission is March 15. There will not be an extension. March 15 is the absolute cut-off date. Applications received after that date will not be considered. The National Guard Regional Volunteer Team (NGVRT) will meet to determine this year's award recipients. Awards will be presented at the National Volunteer Conference and Youth Symposium in New Orleans. Nominations or questions should be sent to: Pamela Hughes State FRG Advisor 105 West Spring Street Oxford, 27565 (919) 693-5016 pamela.hughes5@us.army.mil

Above & Beyond Brenda Creel (left) has shot hundreds of photos for free for NCNG Family Programs at various events. Creel is also a USO volunteer. At a Kids on Guard drill or some other military family event, you’ve probably seen Brenda Creel, with camera in hand. Creel has volunteered with Family Programs since 2007. The results are thousands of pictures that capture memories of military families during various stages. “It's my pleasure to be of service to our military families in many areas whether it be at a Kids on Guard Event, a deployment, homecoming, BYR, or helping plan a "family day" party, coming alongside the family members through a Military Family Support Group, or even helping children make Christmas ornaments for the Governor’s Mansion tree ... wherever I can reasonably assist, it's always such a joy for me to give back to those who have sacrificed so much for our country. It's such a blessing to be a blessing in such a small way,” she said. At her first event, Creel said, she was just coming along to help State Child & Youth Coordinator Alice Dean at Kids on Guard. She said, “I just happened to bring along my camera.” Years later, her contributions help Family Programs preserve the history of North Carolina’s military families. “Making children smile and then passing on that smile on to a military family member who is sacrificing here on the homefront or away on deployment is a thrill for me. It may take their mind off of the tough circumstances they are experiencing for just even a few moments and bring a smile to their heart. That's one reason I give back,” she said Creel, who also volunteers with the USO, said, “With my passion for children, a desire to help support families by encouraging them, and helping to build the morale of soldiers by supporting their families, it all 'just fits' with the gifts and abilities God has given me. To use my photography skills and gift of hospitality and be able to put it into action, is such a blessing!” “So, as long as I can encourage and help bring some joy into the lives of the military members and their family members, I will continue to do what I can,” she said. And, for that, Family Programs wishes to thank Brenda Creel for all that you do!

Interview with Angelena Dockery, NCNG Family Programs

~~JOIN JSS~~ jointservicessupport.org Get program information, events, chat with other military families, and more.

FAMILY MATTERS

NEWS YOU CAN USE

No Military ID, No Discounts, No Tricare By Kathryn Jarvis, NCNG Family Programs

The red military dependant ID card is your ticket to get into the "hottest" deals and onto a military installation. When you have a military dependant ID card you can shop at military installations such as the commissary or AAFES, with a copy of your servicemembers active duty orders or commissary privilege card. Also, several stores and businesses in the community offer military discounts, with proof. Discounts and shopping are not the only thing it helps with. It also gets you in the Defense Eligibility Enrollment System, also known as DEERS. This system is the key to getting your Tricare benefits. If you and your family are not in DEERS, then Tricare does not see you as being eligible for their service. You can receive Tricare benefits under several circumstances. One of which includes your spouse or parent is called to active duty for at least 30 consecutive days. To get you and your family a military dependant ID card you will need bring the documents and paperwork listed below to a RAPIDS location nearest you. There are many ID card facilities throughout the state of North Carolina. There is a RAPIDS locator online at http://www.dmdc.osd.mil/rsl/owa/home. The website allows users to find an ID card facility by state, zip code and city. After you have found a facility that suites you, call and make an appointment with a RAPIDS representative. Making an appointment will help you avoid long wait times and/or lines. What to Bring- Some Things You’ll Need to Bring: Birth Certificates, Marriage License, Copy of Spouse’s Active Duty Orders and Power of Attorney, Driver’s License, etc. Please check online for various ID Card Facilities and acceptable forms of identification. We advise that you call ahead to confirm specific documentation requirements and hours of operation. If you are over the age of 18, bring two forms of valid identification one of which must be a valid photo ID.

DEERS/ID CARDS www.tricare.osd.mil/deers 800.336.4590

Your Military ID Card is also your ticket to discounts and savings. Don’t forget to ask vendors and businesses, “DO YOU HAVE A MILITARY DISCOUNT?”

What’s That? If you need additional information about the terms listed in the crossword puzzle on Page 8, please read below. If you required additional assistance, please contact one of our Family Assistance Center Specialists. NGB -22 - An important document issued by National Guard Bureau, which proves service in the National Guard. It is required to by the VA and other organizations to verify the total amount of service a servicemember served in the National Guard. DD -214 - An important document issued by the Department of Defense, which proves a servicemembers active duty service. It is required by an organizations to verify proof of service, such as the VA, employers, retirement, and veterans organizations. 1351-2 - A form used to get reimbursed for traveling to a military function, job or event outside a 50-mile radius. Invitational Travel Orders - ITO stands for (3 words). Yellow Ribbon - A reintegration program designed for servicemembers and their families transition through different deployment phases. WTU - The acronym for the Wounded Warrior Transition Unit. This program provides critical care to wounded soldiers who needs 6 months or more medical care. MFLC - The acronym for Military Family Life Consultants. Single - How not to Date a Jerk or Jerkette is a _________ soldier seminar. The seminar teaches soldiers how to weed out the ones not right for them through programs like P.I.C.K. TRICARE - A medical program available for servicemembers and families. Marriage Enrichment - A retreat for married military couples to strengthen their relationship. MFRC - The acronym for Military Family Resource Center. It is where Family Assistance Center Specialists at community storefronts provide military families assistance and information on resources and benefits available to them. UFCC - The acronym for Unit Family Contact Center. It is where Family Assistance Center Specialists at armories provide military families assistance and information on resources and benefits available to them. SFAC - The acronym for State Family Assistance Center. It is where Family Assistance Center Specialists at separate buildings on armory property provide military families assistance and information on resources and benefits available to them.