Familly Matters November 2015

Family Matters Volume 6, Issue 11 November 2015

In this issue...   

The History of Veteran’s Day

Veteran’s Day Discounts & Freebies 

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Greenlight A Vet

The History of Thanksgiving

Managing Holiday Stress and more….

Family Matters

November 2015 Diane Coffill State Family Programs Director diane.l.coffill.civ@mail.mil (984) 664-6324 MSG Ramona Robertson State Family Programs Specialist ramona.k.robertson.mil@mail.mil (984) 664-7005 SSG Tammy Fowler State Family Programs Assistant tammy.l.fowler.mil@mail.mil (984) 664-6876 Lana Greer State FAC Coordinator lana.m.greer.ctr@mail.mil (984) 661-1667 Alice Dean Lead Child and Youth Coordinator alice.c.dean.ctr@mail.mil (984) 664-6676 David Nobles Outreach Coordinator david.m.nobles.ctr@mail.mil (984) 664-6721 Terry Henderson Airman and Family Readiness Program Manager terry.r.henderson3.civ@mail.mil (704) 389-4949 About Family Matters Family Matters was created to provide Service Members and their Families the most up to date information and services available. If you would like to contribute to future issues, please contact SSG Tammy Fowler @ tammy.l.fowler.mil@mail.mil

A Message From the Director Happy Military Family Appreciation Month!

You will see quite a varied amount of articles in this month’s Family Matters. We’re VERY thankful for ALL of our Military Families and we should also give thanks for all that we have, are able to do and everyone who is important in our lives.

As you all know, Veteran’s Day is Wednesday, 11 November so please take a look at the two pages of Military Discounts and Freebies that we’ve provided for you. I’m sure there are more out there but these are the ones we know about.

As we prepare for the Thanksgiving holiday, please remember it’s not just a day for GREAT food but actually a day to give thanks for family, friends and fellowship. While our children learn about Thanksgiving in school, let’s also teach them to be THANKFUL for what they have.

With the holidays quickly approaching, all of us will experience some extra stress but do you realize that kids might be feeling the extra stress as well? On page 17, there’s a great article about holiday stress and anxiety in children and how we can help them. On page 19, you’ll see some great tips on managing our own holiday stress.

Please take a few minutes to “meet” a couple of GREAT Family Programs staff members, David Nobles and Lynn Stenson. That way when you actually meet them, you’ll know who they are and where they work. We also have two outstanding Military Families featured in this month’s “Spotlight on Military Families” section.

The First Lady and Governor are providing an opportunity for all Military Children to create a unique handmade Christmas ornament that will be placed on their Military Family Christmas Tree in the Executive Mansion. There is more information about this opportunity inside this issue.

I want to wish everyone a safe and happy Thanksgiving! Remember that we are always here to assist you. See you next month!

References in this newsletter to specific commercial products, processes, services or the use of any trade, firm corporation name does not constitute endorsement, recommendation or favoring by NCNG Family Programs

Diane

Table of Contents

4

Meet Your Family Programs Staff

6

Greenlight A Vet

7

The History of Veteran’s Day

8

Veteran’s Day Freebies & Discounts

10

Spotlight on Military Families

12

The History of Thanksgiving

15

Month of the Military Family

17

Holiday Stress and Anxiety in Children

19

Managing Holiday Stress

If you would like to submit photos or stories for future issues of Family Matters, please contact SSG Tammy Fowler at tammy.l.fowler.mil@mail.mil On the cover: SFC Peter, Natasha and Ethan Chryst HHB 1-113th FA Charlotte, NC

Meet Your Family Programs Staff David Nobles Outreach Coordinator David came to work with Family Programs in September of 2015 as the Outreach Coordinator. Prior to coming on board with Family Programs, David worked in other support services to include Military Funeral Honors, Yellow Ribbon Program and was also the Community Relations Manager for the North Carolina National Guard.

David retired from the North Carolina National Guard in 2013 as Sergeant First Class. He started his military career with the active Army in 1989 as an Air Defense Artillery crewmember. He did his basic training at Ft. Sill, OK and his advanced training at Ft. Bliss, TX. He was stationed at Ft. Lewis, WA and later deployed in support of Operation Desert Shield and Desert Storm.

In 1995, David joined the North Carolina National Guard as a member of the 113th Finance Detachment while attending the University of North Carolina. In 1997, he deployed to Grafenweohr, Germany in support of Operation Joint Endeavor with the 113th Finance Detachment as a military pay supervisor. David was also assigned to the 111th Finance Detachment and Joint Force Headquarters prior to his retirement.

David is married to Brandi, his wife of 23 years and they have three children– Mikayla, Delany and Franklin. Brandi was the Family Readiness Group Leader for Joint Force Headquarters for 4 years and remains a strong supporter of the North Carolina National Guard.

David stays very active and is involved with his son’s Cub Scout Pack, his youngest daughter’s band and his oldest daughter’s volleyball team. He enjoys watching Carolina Hurricanes hockey and follows his Carolina Tar Heels in all sports.

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Meet Your Family Programs Staff Lynn White Stenson Family Assistance Center Specialist

Lynn began working with Family Programs in November of 2009 as a Family Assistance Center Specialist. She has worked at several locations during her time with Family Programs including Charlotte, Kannapolis and currently works in Greensboro. Lynn’s duties include providing confidential assistance and support to Service Members and families regardless of deployment status or branch of service.

Before coming to work for Family Programs, Lynn worked in the NASCAR industry for over 20 years. During the week, she handled licensing, royalties and credentials for race teams such Richard Petty Racing, Rick Hendricks Racing, Kenny Bernstein Racing and others.

On race days, Lynn was on the track as the scorekeeper. She traveled to all of the NASCAR tracks across the country and made many friends during that time as well as learning about competition, teamwork and leadership.

Lynn was born and raised in Charlotte, NC but moved to the Triad area in 2012. She has two children– Chris and Brooke and two granddaughters that keep her on the go.

She also has a dog named Abbie that she loves and adores. She is an avid Duke Blue Devils fan and enjoys all sports. She especially loves the Denver Broncos and says that John Elway is her hero.

Lynn also loves traveling to the beach or just laying out by the pool.

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Walmart has partnered with the Institute for Veterans and Families, Team Red, White and Blue, Team Rubicon Hire Heroes USA and Blue Star Families to launch Greenlight for Vets. This campaign is to help create a visible and actionable national support for America’s veterans and their families.

America’s veterans are some of our nation’s bravest, hardest-working men and women.

However, it is hard to show them the appreciation they deserve when back home and out of uniform. They are camouflaged more than ever. Greenlight a Vet is a campaign to establish visible national support for our veterans by changing one light to green.

Green is the color of hope, renewal and well– being. “Greenlight” is also a term commonly used to activate forward movement. The simple action of changing one light to green is intended to spark a national conversation regarding the recognition of veterans and “greenlight” them forward as valued members of our communities.

Let us honor our veterans not only on November 11th but all year round by changing one light to green in a visible location– on your porch, your home or at your office– and keep it glowing every day as a symbol of appreciation and support for our veterans. To help share your support, take a picture and post it using the hashtag #greenlightavet.

To learn more about Greenlight a Vet campaign, visit www.greenlightavet.com.

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The History of Veteran’s Day On the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month of 1918, an armistice, or temporary cessation of hostilities, was declared between the Allied nations and Germany in the First World War, then known as “the Great War.” Commemorated as Armistice Day beginning the following year, November 11th became a legal federal holiday in the United States in 1938. In the aftermath of World War II and the Korean War, Armistice Day became Veterans Day, a holiday dedicated to American veterans of all wars.

history (more than 16 million people); some 5.7 million more served in the Korean War (1950 to 1953). In 1954, after lobbying efforts by veterans’ service organizations, the 83rd U.S. Congress amended the 1938 act that had made Armistice Day a holiday, striking the word “Armistice” in favor of “Veterans.”

President Dwight D. Eisenhower signed the legislation on June 1, 1954. From then on, November 11 became a day to honor American veterans of all wars.

The Great War & Armistice Day

The next development in the story of Veterans Day unfolded in 1968, when Congress passed the Uniform Holidays Bill, which sought to ensure three-day weekends for federal employees–and encourage tourism and travel–by celebrating four national holidays (Washington’s Birthday, Memorial Day, Veterans Day and Columbus Day) on Mondays.

Though the Treaty of Versailles was signed on June 28, 1919, November 11 remained in the public imagination as the date that marked the end of the Great War. In November 1918, U.S. President Woodrow Wilson proclaimed November 11 as the first commemoration of Armistice Day. The day’s observation included parades and public gatherings, as well as a brief pause in business activities at 11 a.m. On November 11, 1921, an unidentified American soldier killed in the war was buried at Arlington National Cemetery in Washington, D.C.; the U.S. Congress had declared the day a legal federal holiday in honor of all those who participated in the war.

On the same day, unidentified soldiers were laid to rest at Westminster Abbey in London and at the Arc de Triomphe in Paris. On June 4, 1926, Congress passed a resolution that the “recurring anniversary of [November 11, 1918] should be commemorated with thanksgiving and prayer and exercises designed to perpetuate peace through good will and mutual understanding between nations” and that the president should issue an annual proclamation calling for the observance of Armistice Day. By that time, 27 state legislatures had made November 11 a legal holiday. An act approved May 13, 1938 made November 11 a legal Federal holiday, “dedicated to the cause of world peace and to be hereafter celebrated and known as ‘Armistice Day.’” In actuality, there are no U.S. national holidays because the states retain the right to designate their own, and the government can only designate holidays for federal employees and for the District of Columbia. In practice, however, states almost always follow the federal lead.

From Armistice Day to Veterans Day American effort during World War II (1941-1945) saw the greatest mobilization of the U.S. Army, Navy, Marines and Air Force in the nation’s

The observation of Veterans Day was set as the fourth Monday in October. The first Veterans Day under the new law was Monday, October 25, 1971; confusion ensued, as many states disapproved of this change, and continued to observe the holiday on its original date. In 1975, after it became evident that the actual date of Veterans Day carried historical and patriotic significance to many Americans, President Gerald R. Ford signed a new law returning the observation of Veterans Day to November 11th beginning in 1978. If November 11 falls on a Saturday or Sunday, the federal government observes the holiday on the previous Friday or following Monday, respectively.

Celebrating Veterans Day Around the World Britain, France, Australia and Canada also commemorate the veterans of World Wars I and II on or near November 11th: Canada has Remembrance Day, while Britain has Remembrance Sunday (the second Sunday of November). In Europe, Britain and the Commonwealth countries it is common to observe two minutes of silence at 11 a.m. every November 11.

In the United States, an official wreath-laying ceremony is held each Veterans Day at the Tomb of the Unknowns in Arlington National Cemetery, while parades and other celebrations are held in states around the country. Veterans Day is not to be confused with Memorial Day–a common misunderstanding, according to the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. Memorial Day (the fourth Monday in May) honors American Service Members who died in service to their country or as a result of injuries incurred during battle, while Veterans Day pays tribute to all American veterans– living or dead–but especially gives thanks to living veterans who served their country honorably during war or peacetime.

Article courtesy of www.history.com

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Veteran’s Day Freebies & Discounts

Veteran’s Day 2015 is right around the corner and there is always a ton of restaurants and businesses who show their appreciation by giving away free meals or discounts to Veterans on this very important day.

Here is a list of discounts on restaurants, goods and services for 2015. Be sure to present your military ID and check with your local establishments to ensure they are participating in these discounts.

Restaurants 

Applebee’s— Veterans and active duty military receive a free meal from a limited menu on 11 November.

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Bob Evans— Veterans and active duty military will receive a free breakfast from a limited menu on 11 November.

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California Pizza Kitchen— Choose a pizza, full size salad or pasta from a special Veteran’s Day menu on 11 November.

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Chili’s— Veterans and active duty Service Members get a free entrée from a limited menu on 11 November.

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Denny’s— Active, inactive and retired military personnel get a free “Build Your Own Grand Slam” on 11 November from 5 a. m. to noon at participating locations.

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Golden Corral— Golden Corral Restaurant’s Military Appreciation Night free dinner will be available on 11 November from 5 p.m. to 9 p.m.

Military retirees, Veterans, active duty, National Guard and Reserves are all welcome.

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IHOP– On 11 November, participating IHOP Restaurants offer Veterans and active duty military free RED, WHITE and BLUE pancakes from 7 a.m. to 7 p.m.

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Little Caesars— Veterans and active duty military receive a free $5 lunch combo from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. on 11 November.

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McCormick and Schmick’s Seafood Restaurant— On 8 November, participating McCormick and Schmick’s Seafood Restaurants will offer a complimentary entrée to Veterans from a special menu.

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Menchie’s— All active and retired military personnel will receive a free 6 oz. frozen yogurt on 11 November.

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O’Charley’s— Veterans and active duty Service Members get a free $9.99 meal on 9 November as well as free pie on 11 November.

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Olive Garden— Veterans will receive a free entrée with proof of service on 11 November.

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On the Border— Veterans and active duty members can enjoy a free meal from the “Create Your Own Combo” menu on 11 November.

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Orange Leaf– Veterans and active duty military get a free cup of froyo on 11 November.

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Texas Roadhouse– Texas Roadhouse locations nationwide will offer a free lunch to Veterans on 11 November from 11 a. m. to 2 p.m. Offer is good for active duty, retired or former U.S. military.

Retailers 

Bed, Bath & Beyond— Veterans and U.S. Military get a 20% discount on 11 November. Offer is valid in store only.

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Brides Across America Free Wedding Gown Events— During the month of November, Brides Across America is partnering with bridal salons across America to give a way wedding dresses to qualifying military brides.

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Great Clips— Great Clips locations nationwide are offering free haircuts to active, inactive, or retired military Service Member to include the National Guard on 11 November

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Rack Room Shoes— Military personnel and dependents get 10% off their entire purchase on 11 November.

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Free Car Wash— Visit GraceForVets.org for participating locations near you.

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Free Night at a B&B— Get a free night stay at a Bed and Breakfast on Veteran’s Day. See list of participating B&Bs at B&Bs for Vets.

Don’t forget Veteran’s Day is 11 November 2015.

Spotlight on Military Families

SFC Elliot & Danielle Westbrook 5th BN 113th Field Artillery

Whenever you run into SFC Elliot Westbrook, the 5th Battalion 113th Field Artillery Digital Master Gunner and full time Assistant Operations NCO, you are sure to meet his wife, Danielle. They are an inseparable team. Having been together for 13 years, these college sweethearts recently celebrated their 6th wedding anniversary and are excited about welcoming their first child, a boy, in early March 2016.

With over 13 years in the North Carolina National Guard, SFC Westbrook has deployed twice, once to Iraq and most recently to Egypt in support of the Multi-National Force and Observers mission. During his deployment to Egypt, Danielle contracted with Central Texas College and deployed to Camp Arifjan, Kuwait, where she mentored Soldiers on their educational careers.

When SFC Westbrook was the Training NCO with 5th BN 113th FA, Danielle was known for her “Household Six Bulletin” that was published along with his monthly drill letters. This bulletin educated family members on military programs, current events and what to expect from upcoming military exercises.

In their time off, you are sure to find them in the company of their three dogs-Triton, Tenzing and Nola– hiking on the Appalachian Trail, exploring North Carolina’s hidden treasures or scuba diving in the Caribbean.

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Patricia DeAnda-Likes Mother of SGT Felichia Likes Joint Force Headquarters

Patricia DeAnda-Likes is the mother of SGT Felichia Likes of Joint Force Headquarters in Raleigh, NC. Patricia truly understands what it means to be a military family member because she has been a part of one her entire life. Her father, Richard Guerrero served in the United States Navy. Her husband, Shane Likes served in the United States Army and her daughter is currently serving in the North Carolina National Guard.

Patricia has faced many obstacles in her life . She has been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome, Multiple Sclerosis and is a three time breast cancer survivor. She has not let those obstacles stop her from living a full life and giving back to her community, however.

Patricia serves as an Advocate/Survivor of Domestic Violence for 17 years as well as doing volunteer work for Christian United Outreach Center of Lee County. She is also the manager for the Charity Tracker Database which falls under the umbrella of the United Way of Lee County. Patricia serves as a council member for 4 -H and Lee County Young Commissioners program. Her current project involves baking cookies for the Soldiers of HHC 1252 AR who are currently deployed to Kosovo. Patricia, along with the Young Commissioners will be sending those Service Members a personalized tin of cookies along with hot chocolate packets and a hand written letter thanking them for their service.

Patricia is the mother of four, has 12 grandchildren and godmother to 79 youth who range from ages birth to 24. She is constantly spreading her love for helping others in and around her community while also helping her daughter care for her two children whenever the need arises.

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History of Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving at Plymouth In September 1620, a small ship called the Mayflower left Plymouth, England, carrying 102 passengers— an assortment of religious separatists seeking a new home where they could freely practice their faith and other individuals lured by the promise of prosperity and land ownership in the New World. After a treacherous and uncomfortable crossing that lasted 66 days, they dropped anchor near the tip of Cape Cod, far north of their intended destination at the mouth of the Hudson River. One month later, the Mayflower crossed Massachusetts Bay, where the Pilgrims, as they are now commonly known, began the work of establishing a village at Plymouth.

Throughout that first brutal winter, most of the colonists remained on board the ship, where they suffered from exposure, scurvy and outbreaks of contagious disease. Only half of the Mayflower’s original passengers and crew lived to see their first New England spring. In March, the remaining settlers moved ashore, where they received an astonishing visit from an Abenaki Indian who greeted them in English. Several days later, he returned with another Native American, Squanto, a member of the Pawtuxet tribe who had been kidnapped by an English sea captain and sold into slavery before escaping to London and returning to his homeland on an exploratory expedition. Squanto taught the Pilgrims, weakened by malnutrition and illness, how to cultivate corn, extract sap from maple trees, catch fish in the rivers and avoid poisonous plants. He also helped the settlers forge an alliance with the Wampanoag, a

local tribe, which would endure for more than 50 years and tragically remains one of the sole examples of harmony between European colonists and Native Americans.

In November 1621, after the Pilgrims’ first corn harvest proved successful, Governor William Bradford organized a celebratory feast and invited a group of the fledgling colony’s Native American allies, including the Wampanoag chief Massasoit. Now remembered as American’s “first Thanksgiving”—although the Pilgrims themselves may not have used the term at the time—the festival lasted for three days. While no record exists of the historic banquet’s exact menu, the Pilgrim chronicler Edward Winslow wrote in his journal that Governor Bradford sent four men on a “fowling” mission in preparation for the event, and that the Wampanoag guests arrived bearing five deer. Historians have suggested that many of the dishes were likely prepared using traditional Native American spices and cooking methods. Because the Pilgrims had no oven and the Mayflower’s sugar supply had dwindled by the fall of 1621, the meal did not feature pies, cakes or other desserts, which have become a hallmark of contemporary celebrations.

Thanksgiving Becomes an Official Holiday Pilgrims held their second Thanksgiving celebration in 1623 to mark the end of a long drought that had threatened the year’s harvest and prompted Governor Bradford to call for a religious fast. Days of fasting and thanksgiving on an annual or occasional basis became common practice in other New England settlements as well.

During the American Revolution, the Continental Congress designated one or more days of thanksgiving a year, and in 1789 George Washington issued the first Thanksgiving proclamation by the national government of the United States; in it, he called upon Americans to express their gratitude for the happy conclusion to the country’s war of independence and the successful ratification of the U.S. Constitution. His successors John Adams and James Madison also designated days of thanks during their presidencies.

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In 1817, New York became the first of several states to officially adopt an annual Thanksgiving holiday; each celebrated it on a different day, however, and the American South remained largely unfamiliar with the tradition. In 1827, the noted magazine editor and prolific writer Sarah Josepha Hale—author, among countless other things, of the nursery rhyme “Mary Had a Little Lamb”— launched a campaign to establish Thanksgiving as a national holiday. For 36 years, she published numerous editorials and sent scores of letters to governors, senators, presidents and other politicians. Abraham Lincoln finally heeded her request in 1863, at the height of the Civil War, in a proclamation entreating all Americans to ask God to “commend to his tender care all those who have become widows, orphans, mourners or sufferers in the lamentable civil strife” and to “heal the wounds of the nation.” He scheduled Thanksgiving for the final Thursday in November, and it was celebrated on that day every year until 1939, when Franklin D. Roosevelt moved the holiday up a week in an attempt to spur retail sales during the Great Depression. Roosevelt’s plan, known derisively as Franksgiving, was met with passionate opposition, and in 1941 the president reluctantly signed a bill making Thanksgiving the fourth Thursday in November.

Thanksgiving Traditions In many American households, the Thanksgiving celebration has lost much of its original religious significance; instead, it now centers on cooking and sharing a bountiful meal with family and friends.

Turkey, a Thanksgiving staple so ubiquitous it has become all but synonymous with the holiday, may or may not have been on offer when the Pilgrims hosted the inaugural feast in 1621. Today, however, nearly 90 percent of Americans eat the bird—whether roasted, baked or deep-fried—on Thanksgiving, according to the National Turkey Federation. Other traditional foods include stuffing, mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce and pumpkin pie.

Volunteering is a common Thanksgiving Day activity, and communities often hold food drives and host free dinners for the less fortunate.

Thanksgiving turkeys each year, sparing the birds from slaughter and sending them to a farm for retirement. A number of U.S. governors also perform the annual turkey pardoning ritual.

Thanksgiving Controversies For some scholars, the jury is still out on whether the feast at Plymouth really constituted the first Thanksgiving in the United States. Indeed, historians have recorded other ceremonies of thanks among European settlers in North America that predate the Pilgrims’ celebration. In 1565, for instance, the Spanish explorer Pedro Menéndez de Avilé invited members of the local Timucua tribe to a dinner in St. Augustine, Florida, after holding a mass to thank God for his crew’s safe arrival. On December 4, 1619, when 38 British settlers reached a site known as Berkeley Hundred on the banks of Virginia’s James River, they read a proclamation designating the date as “a day of thanksgiving to Almighty God.” Some Native Americans and others take issue with how the Thanksgiving story is presented to the American public, and especially to schoolchildren. In their view, the traditional narrative paints a deceptively sunny portrait of relations between the Pilgrims and the Wampanoag people, masking the long and bloody history of conflict between Native Americans and European settlers that resulted in the deaths of millions. Since 1970, protesters have gathered on the day designated as Thanksgiving at the top of Cole’s Hill, which overlooks Plymouth Rock, to commemorate a “National Day of Mourning.” Similar events are held in other parts of the country.

Thanksgiving’s Ancient Origins Although the American concept of Thanksgiving developed in the colonies of New England, its roots can be traced back to the other side of the Atlantic. Both the Separatists who came over on the Mayflower and the Puritans who arrived soon after brought with them a tradition of providential holidays—days of fasting during difficult or pivotal moments and days of feasting and celebration to thank God in times of plenty.

As an annual celebration of the harvest and its bounty, moreover, Thanksgiving falls under a category of festivals that spans cultures, continents and millennia. In ancient times, the Egyptians, Parades have also become an Greeks and Romans feasted and paid tribute to their gods after the integral part of the holiday in fall harvest. Thanksgiving also bears a resemblance to the ancient cities and towns across the Jewish harvest festival of Sukkot. Finally, historians have noted United States. Presented by that Native Americans had a rich tradition of commemorating the Macy’s department store since fall harvest with feasting and merrymaking long before Europeans 1924, New York City’s set foot on their shores.

Thanksgiving Day parade is the largest and most famous, attracting some 2 to 3 million spectators along its 2.5-mile route and drawing an enormous Article courtesy of television audience. It typically features marching bands, www.history.com performers, elaborate floats conveying various celebrities and giant balloons shaped like cartoon characters.

Beginning in the mid-20th century and perhaps even earlier, the president of the United States has “pardoned” one or two 13

An Invitation from the USO of North Carolina

November Designated as Month of the Military Family

By Army National Guard Staff Sgt. Darron Salzer| National Guard Bureau| November 03, 2015

support other than themselves. A lot of times they are geo-dispersed; we’re not installation based. So November is when we honor those sacrifices that the entire family makes,” she said.

The mission of the Guard is combat and service member readiness, said Armstrong.

ARLINGTON, Va.— Since 1993, the month of November has been recognized as Month of the Military Family

across the Department of Defense as a way to thank all family members who have supported the career of a service member.

“National Guard families are important because the strength of our service members comes from the strength of their families.” said Jennifer Armstrong, the readiness manager for the National Guard Bureau Family Programs office. “Families are a vital part of the Guard’s ability to remain strong, and with thousands of service members deploying over the past 14 years, our families have never wavered in their support despite the many challenges they have faced.”

“But we have to also think about family readiness, because if your service member’s home life is not together then often times they’re not ready or able to deploy and be a productive member of that team,” she said.

And as Guard members, having peace of mind about family readiness often includes domestic operations as well.

“Domestic operations can happen overnight and because they happen like that we’re called to serve our governors and states in a moment’s notice, and that can be stressful to the family,” Armstrong said.

Which is why ensuring family readiness is critical, she said.

Though the focus is often on the immediate members of a Soldier’s or Airman’s family, Armstrong said family for “The military family is important to the mission of the Guard and we are committed to helping families remain most extends way beyond that. strong by providing the services necessary to ensure “This month is to honor all family members—mothers, every member of the family feels supported and fathers, aunts, uncles, grandparents,” she said. “Friends connected to the military and the nation,” Armstrong can become family, especially for those in the military because you’re not always close to home and for some, employers are an extension of family as well.”

That is especially true for the men and women scattered across the country who serve in the Guard.

“When our Citizen-Soldiers leave [on a deployment], they leave their family behind, often times with no

Holiday Stress and Anxiety in Children: How Parents Can Help The holidays are a fun and joyous time, but also a very busy one, and holiday pressure and anxiety in children is a common occurrence. During the holidays, there are lots of fun activities and events going on, both at home and at school. And while that can be a good thing, the reality is that all that hustle and bustle means schedules are often out of whack, bedtimes get pushed back, and routines are disrupted.

It can also be a particularly stressful time for families facing financial challenges, in split or blended families, and in families where a loved one has recently passed away.

way other people behave, but you do have control over the way you react to other people’s behavior

One of the first steps for parents is to realize how much stress kids are under – much of it related to the economy and school. The American Psychological Association's recent Stress in America survey found that while 45 percent of teens and 26 percent of tweens said they were under more stress this year, less than a third of parents even noticed their kids' increased worry.

•Bring a favorite stuffed animal, blanket, book, game, or small toy when traveling

•Accept that traditions change as families change and that things don’t have to be the same or perfect to be special •Discuss plans in advance so activities are predictable and children know what is expected of them. •Try not to abandon healthy lifestyle habits.

•Attempt to stick to established routines and continue to consistently enforce established rules and consequences

•Anticipate times when children will be waiting and bring something to entertain them •Be prepared with healthy snacks and drinks if you are out of the house longer than expected

•Plan ahead and accept that you might not be able to And their worry is affecting the quality of their lives: do or participate in everything 42 percent of teens and 30 percent of tweens report •Acknowledge feelings and help children find ways to headaches; 49 percent of teens and 39 percent of appropriately express them tweens cite difficulty sleeping; 39 percent of teens and •Help children find a special way to remember 27 percent of tweens say they eat too much or too special people who are not with them over the little. holidays Tips to help prevent and manage stress during the •Encourage children to take time to relax and holidays: appreciate what they have •Remember that children can be impacted by stress •Establish a budget and attempt to stick to it. Don’t in the family and try to effectively manage your own promise children gifts that you cannot realistically stress give them and don’t be afraid to let children know if •Recognize that family relationships are a source of something is too expensive or they are asking for too support, but they can also trigger stress many gifts.

•Spend time with people you care about and try not to isolate yourself Sources: •Accept family members and friends for who they are and put aside conflicts or unrealistic expectations

Charlotte Reznick, Ph.D- Psychology Today “Holiday Stress Busters” Barbara Keith Walter, Ph.D., M.P.H.- Duke’s Children “Stress Busters”

•Remember that you do not have control over the 17

Managing Holiday Stress The holidays can be a joyful time, offering a chance to reconnect with friends and family. But they can also be stressful . You may feel pressure to buy and give gifts. Maybe you are worried about money. The holidays can also be hectic. There never seems to be enough time to get things done. Think about the kinds of events that trigger stress for you during the holidays. Then you can focus on one or two things you can do that will help the most to reduce stress.

Here are some ideas: Preparing for the holidays 

Know your spending limit. Lack of money is one of the biggest causes of stress during the holiday season. This year, set a budget, and don't spend more than you've planned. It's okay to tell your child that a certain toy costs too much.

Don't buy gifts that you'll spend the rest of the year trying to pay off.

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Give something personal. You can show love and caring with any gift that is meaningful and personal. It doesn't have to cost a lot. Or use words instead of an expensive gift to let people know how important they are to you. Make a phone call or write a note and share your feelings.

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Get organized. Make lists or use an appointment book to keep track of tasks to do and events to attend.

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Share the tasks. You don't have to do everything yourself. Share your "to do" list with others. Spend time with friends and family while you share tasks like decorating, wrapping gifts, and preparing the holiday meal.

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Learn to say no. It's okay to say "no" to events that aren't important to you. This will give you more time to say "yes" to events that you do want to attend.

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Be realistic. Try not to put pressure on yourself to create the perfect holiday for your family. Focus instead on the traditions that make holidays special for you. And remember that just because it's a holiday, family problems don't go away. If you have a hard time being around your relatives, it's okay to set limits on your time at events and visits.

During the holidays You may not be able to avoid stressful situations during the holidays. But you can plan to respond to them in a healthy way. 

Take breaks from group activities. Pay attention to your own needs and feelings. Spend a little time by yourself if you can. Meditate, or do some relaxation breathing. Go for a short walk.



Keep a regular sleep, meal, and exercise schedule. Limit your alcohol. Taking care of yourself will help you deal with stressful situations during the holidays.

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Get support if you need it. Holidays can sometimes trigger depression. They can be especially hard if you are already dealing with the death of a loved one or the breakup of a relationship. You may feel embarrassed to ask for help, or you may think that you'll get over "the blues" on your own. But most people need treatment to get better. Talk with your doctor about counseling and medicine for depression.

WebMD Medical Reference from

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Family Assistance Centers

Statewide Support

East Flat Rock Unit Family Contact Center 2025 Spartanburg Hwy. 28726 Rebekah Torres: rebekah.s.torres.ctr@mail.mil (984) 661-0565

NCNG Service Members and Families’ First Line of Defense Call 1-855-322-3848

Charlotte Unit Family Contact Center 4240 West Blvd. 28208 Carry Bandy: carry.s.bandy.ctr@mail.mil (984) 661-4573 Anthony Moore: anthony.r.moore8.ctr@mail.mil (984) 661-4547

Military OneSource Here to help you with just about any need, by phone or online. The service is completely private and confidential with few exceptions. www.militaryonesource.mil 1-800-342-9647

Greensboro State Family Assistance Center 110 Franklin Blvd. 27401 Lynn Stenson: deborah.t.stenson2.ctr@mail.mil (984) 661-5649 Greenville State Family Assistance Center 1401 N. Memorial Dr. 27834 Kelly Wells: kelly.a.wells8.ctr@mail.mil (984) 661-1150 Lenoir State Family Assistance Center 1535 Beecher Anderson Rd. 28645 Frances Johnson: frances.r.johnson28.ctr@mail.mil (984) 661-1242 Raleigh Unit Family Contact Center 1636 Gold Star Dr. 27607 Wendi Bell: wendi.h.bell.ctr@mail.mil (984) 664-6078 Lisa Faison: lisa.m.faison.ctr@mail.mil (984) 664-7100 Mark Woolbright: mark.l.woolbright.ctr@mail.mil (984) 664-7102 Smithfield Unit Family Contact Center 406 Hospital Rd. 27577 Abby Millsap: abigail.e.millsap.ctr@mail.mil (984) 661-2784 Southern Pines Unit Family Contact Center 510 Morganton Rd. 28387 Earlene Buchan earlene.b.capps.ctr@mail.mil (984) 661-2683 Wilmington Unit Family Contact Center 2412 Infantry Rd. 28405 Jim Marley: james.e.marley.ctr@mail.mil (984) 661-6918 Winston-Salem Unit Family Contact Center 2000 Silas Creek Pkwy. 27103 Sandy Harrison: sandra.b.harrison2.ctr@mail.mil (984)-661-7131

Family Readiness Support Services

Charlotte Nikkie Newsome genesia.k.newsome.ctr@mail.mil (984) 661-4548

Morrisville George Lane george.w.lane2.ctr@mail.mil (984) 661-6313

Clinton Chekea Hinton-Mack (984) 661-5136

Raleigh Norman Dean norman.g.dean2.ctr@mail.mil (984) 664-6537

Goldsboro Gerald Murray gerald.t.murray.ctr@mail.mil (984) 661-5423

FRSS Trainer Gloria Fields gloria.d.fields.ctr@mail.mil (984) 661-5620

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