Neapolitan Family November 2021 Digital Issue

NOVEMBER 2021

COMPLIMENTARY

Gratitude Project

8 ways to encourage thankfulness in your kids

Cover Kids Meet our winners

Destination: Animal sanctuaries

Holidays & Grief Balancing loss and celebrations

Side Gigs

Turning hobbies NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021 into hustle

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Returning to “normal” may not be easy for our children and teens.

Anxiety, depression, and

suicide are on the

and

teens.

rise in children

Don’t ignore the signs that your child may be struggling with their thoughts and feelings.

For over 50 years, DLC has been helping our community with access to:

• Individual & Family Therapy

• Psychiatric & Medication Evaluation & Management • 24/7 Emergency Services & Crisis Stabilization

• Children’s Partial Hospitalization Program (PHP) • In-Home Services and more

6075 BATHEY LANE | NAPLES, FL 34116

Click or Call to Connect to Care Today

DLCenters.org | 239-455-8500 2

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NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

Th an k yo u for yo u r co nti n u ed s u p p o r t.. .

We Are Grateful

Spend the holidays in your dream home. Contact us to start your homebuying journey!

TR AC EY A L B ERT R E A LT O R ®

(239) 572-8643 Tracey@LiveParadiseLiveNaples.com LiveParadiseLiveNaples.com

D O W N I N G - F R Y E R E A LT Y, I N C .

8950 FONTANA DEL SOL WAY, SUITE 100, NAPLES, FL 34109 NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

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November 2021 TABLE OF CONTENTS

in every issue . . .

7

FROM THE PUBLISHER

8

YOUR COMMUNITY

11

COLLIER COUNTY PUBLIC SCHOOLS UPDATE

16

EVENT CALENDAR

on the cover…

12 Diabetes and Your Child.

What parents need to know about this disease.

by Douglas Halbert, M.D. 14 Grief During the Holidays.

How you can help a loved one, or yourself, cope with loss this time of year.

by Leigh Ann Newman 22 Gratitude Project. Eight ways to encourage thankfulness in our kids, plus a fun family craft.

by Jill Morgenstern

27

24 Side Gigs. Five things you should consider before adding a side job.

by Lissa Carlson Nathan Romain is 3 years old and lives in Naples. He loves his big brother, Chase, and anything to do with the planets, all of which he knows by name. He wants to be an astronaut and enjoys visiting Cape Canaveral, where he hopes one day to see a rocket launch. He also loves sports and spending time with his cousins.

Cover photo by Monica Alvarez of Monica Alvarez Photography www.monicaalvarezphotography.com 305-815-3495 info@monicaalvarezphotography.com

27 Cover Kids. Meet the winners of the 2021-22 Neapolitan Family Cover Kids contest.

28 Destination: Animal Sanctuaries.

Find out where you can visit with and support rescued animals, both locally and across Florida.

by Karen T. Bartlett

28

FALL CLASSES September through December at CFABS!

We welcome kids ages 3.5+ to our innovative Fall youth education program, which includes courses in Visual Arts: Drawing, Painting, Sculpture; Technology: Animation, 3D Printing, Music Production; Dance: Ballet, Tap, Hip Hop, Broadway. Plus, this season is packed full of great Theatrical opportunities, onstage and off! Check out our brand new courses: StageTech and Triple Threat (Sing/Dance/Act); workshops in Special FX Makeup, Fight Choreography and more!

Convenient Class Times: Homeschool · After School · Saturdays

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2 Centers | 1 Mission | Arts for All Performing Arts Center: 10150 Bonita Beach Rd Visual Arts Center: 26100 Old 41 Rd

To register call 239.495.8989 artcenterbonita.org ·

NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

®

Helping Hands•Caring Hearts•Healing Support

OPEN HOUSE AT

Honor Children’s Grief Awareness Day

All families welcome!

Stop in at Aunt Janet’s House for a fun and interactive meet-and-greet with the Avow Kids team!

• Check out the GLOW Room • Play foosball, table tennis, volleyball, corn hole, spike ball and can jam • Enjoy art-for-fun activity stations featuring Model Magic® and crafts to express gratitude • Enjoy snacks from a food truck Funding provided in part by:

FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 19, 2021 4:00 PM to 6:00 PM (Stay for the movie, “Finding Nemo”, at 6:00 PM!) 1301 Whippoorwill Lane, Naples Avow campus RSVP to avowkids@avowcares.org or (239) 261-4404 Please let us know if your family plans to stay for the movie

Avow | Florida Hospice License 5022096 since 1983 | 1095 Whippoorwill Lane, Naples FL 34105 | (888) 484-AVOW (2869) | (239) 261-4404 | avowcares.org NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

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things to do with

1. Botanical Gardens

6. Farmer Mike's U-Pick

2. Boat Sightseeing Tour

7. Celebration Park

3. Rent a Boat

8. Baker Park

4. Visit Marco Island

9. The Pier

5. Comedy Club

1 . Corkscre0 S0amp Sanctuary

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NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

from the publisher… the parenting magazine devoted to collier county

P.O. Box 110656 Naples, FL 34108 info@neafamily.com 2020

2020

2020

THIS MONTH Happy Thanksgiving!

2020

Co-Publisher Stacy Nicolau snicolau@neafamily.com 239-370-5333 Co-Publisher Leigh Ann Newman lanewman@neafamily.com 239-272-0529 Travel Editor Karen T. Bartlett mostlykidsguides@gmail.com 239-595-9026 Feature Writer Anna Snyder Editorial submissions are welcome. We reserve the right to edit, reject, or comment editorially on all material contributed. We cannot be responsible for return of any unsolicited materials.

Articles and advertisements in Neapolitan Family do not necessarily reflect the opinion of the publisher nor does the publisher assume responsibility for statements made by our advertisers or editorial contributors. Acceptance of advertising by Neapolitan Family does not constitute an endorsement of the products, services, or information. We do not knowingly present any product or service that is fraudulent or misleading in nature. Neapolitan Family is available free of charge at distribution points throughout Collier County, as well as digitally at https://neafamily.com. Neapolitan Family is ©2021 by Neapolitan Family Publishing LLC. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or part without written permission is strictly prohibited.

NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

Working at Neapolitan Family began as a side hustle for my co-publisher, Leigh Ann, and me. We both were divorced moms of young children who picked up writing and editing jobs for the previous owner, Andrea, simply because it involved tasks that could be done any time of the day, while our kids were at school or sleeping. Though we had been working for Neapolitan Family for several years, we hadn’t even met when Andrea told us she was moving to California and the magazine was for sale. She knew that we understood her vision for the magazine she had started nearly two decades before, and wanted us to form a partnership and take it over for her. And that’s how we turned a side gig into an actual career for both of us.

With the past two years perhaps being a little leaner and the holidays approaching, you also may want to investigate side hustles. On page 34, writer Lissa Carlson explores options for making a little extra cash for the holidays and to make ends meet all year long.

Or, you may have just re-evaluated your priorities and want to turn your passion into your full-time job. On page 28, Travel Editor Karen T. Bartlett introduces us to five Florida animal sanctuaries started as a side gig by women who each left the business world to devote themselves full time to their passions.

While this may be the first Thanksgiving since COVID-19 that you will be celebrating with extended family and friends, for many people there may be a beloved empty seat at that table. Because this is true for my own family, we asked Avow for tips on how to manage grief during the upcoming holiday celebrations. If you have family or friends who have experienced a loss in the past year, this article on page 14 can help you support their grief as well.

Neapolitan Family is grateful for our readers who enjoy our publications and our community businesses and nonprofit partners who have continued to trust us during 2020 and 2021.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Stacy neafamily.com

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YOUR COMMUNITY NEWS & EVENTS

NACS Naples Adventist Christian School

We are a K-8th grade school centrally located in Naples. We are proud to have a committed staff teaching a nationally certified and accredited curriculum in a Christ-filled environment. We accept Step Up For Students and Florida Empowerment scholarships. The NACS family exists to show children Jesus, teach them to think, and empower them to serve. All students are welcome!

Contact us to schedule a visit, or explore online.

2629 S. Horseshoe Drive, Naples, FL 34104 239-261-NACS (6227) • nacs@flcoe.org www.NaplesACS.org

Miguel Argumosa, DMD, Erin M. Taylor, DMD, Nicole Eastham, DMD Sarah Vanderbosch, DMD Board Certified Pediatric Dentists

Three Locations to Serve You. BONITA SPRINGS

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Village School Breaks Ground On Track and Field Complex

T

he Village School of Naples broke ground this fall on its new $1.8 million track and field facility, with an anticipated completion date of February 2022.

The new facilities will include a 400-meter synthetic track with spectator stands and an interior competition field for all field events and other sports, such as soccer and lacrosse.

The project is part of an ongoing $3 million capital campaign to renovate and expand the school’s academic, arts, and athletic facilities, including a near doubling of space in the two-story Upper School building, as well as a new culinary arts test kitchen. Also within Upper School is the new Lauren S. Tayon Drama Studio, with a main stage area along with rehearsal space, music rooms, storage, and dining/theater seating.

The Village School of Naples is an independent school serving students in preschool through 12th grade. For more information visit www.villageschoolnaples.org.

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Golden PAWS Introduces Class of 2023, Seeks Financial Assistance

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he Golden PAWS Assistance Dogs Cadet Class of 2023 consists of 11 dogs. Upon graduation, each of these dogs will assist a combat-wounded veteran or child with disabilities.

Each year, Golden PAWS selects puppies that are suited for work as service dogs. Each puppy is selected based on health and temperament history by Jeannie Bates, executive director and CEO of Golden PAWS, and tested on its cognitive abilities to determine its potential as a service dog.

New puppies join the 2.5-year-long training program at eight weeks old. Fully trained dogs are matched with either a combatwounded veteran or a child with life-changing disabilities. Golden PAWS has a 95% success rate for permanent placement, almost double the 50% national industry average.

Golden PAWS operates solely from donations and receives no government funding. In the wake of last year’s cancellation of its NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

New Book About Divorce Authored by Naples Woman

N

major fundraising event, Santa PAWS, the 2021 fundraiser will be an online event featuring recipients of Golden PAWS service dogs telling their stories.

The Golden PAWS training model is based on a new class of puppies entering the program every year. Taking a year off because of the Santa PAWS cancellation would have had a devastating effect on the program, and is not an option, according to Bates. “The decision to cancel this year’s event was not an easy one and requires us to find alternative ways to raise funds needed to train, feed, house, and care for our puppies,” adds Cindy Nelson, vice president of philanthropy for Golden PAWS. To learn more or to donate, contact Cindy Nelson at 239-2767293 or cindy@goldenpaws.org.

aples author and mom Kristina Jay launched her debut book, The Conscious Divorce: 30 Principles to Help You Choose Yourself, at a book signing last month.

At the book signing, Jay reflected that the first draft of the book was a very personal account of her experience and the process she went through during her divorce. She realized that while cathartic and healing, she did not want to publish her family’s personal experience, Kristina Jay but wanted to write about what she learned that served her well: to go through the divorce with mindfulness, intention, consciousness, and awareness. “Divorce can leave you feeling powerless and broken. Add children into the process and the pressure to protect them can be overwhelming and exhausting,” Jay says. “The Conscious Divorce will mindfully guide you through all phases of the divorce process.” The book is published by O’Leary Publishing of Naples.

Order at www.kristinajay.com and www.olearypublishing.com.

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YOUR COMMUNITY NEWS & EVENTS

New Minature Horse Program at Naples Therapeutic Riding Center

Sunday with selected matinees. Tickets are $50 to $75, with children and group prices available. Tickets can be reserved by calling 239-278-4422, visiting https://broadwaypalm.com, or in person at 1380 Colonial Blvd. in Fort Myers. $100,000 grant from the Virginia B. Toulmin Foundation is funding a new miniature horse therapy program at Naples Therapeutic Riding Center (NTRC), a nonprofit organization providing therapeutic horseback riding and other equine-facilitated services to children and adults with physical, social, and mental health needs. aplesminiature Classical horses, Academy, a newand classical curriculum K-12 Two Toulmin Itty Bitty, were donated charter school, recently welcomed students for the 2021-22 to NTRC. Miniature horses, known as “minis”, are similar to their school, less than one year in after choosing the school’s location. and full-sized equine partners terms of personality, intelligence, NCA currently offers grades K-10, and will add 11th grade disposition. The grant was used to improve the facilities to ensure for the 2022-23 school year, and 12th grade the following year. the safety of the minis as well as fund the new position of equine The manager school follows a classicaland curriculum utilizes explicit resource to implement facilitate that the program. phonics and grammar, classic literature, and the Socratic In addition to having the minis on site at the ridingmethod center, of instruction, with atraveling focus onprogram moral character andthe civic virtue.

NTRC’s new mini will bring therapeutic Students study Spanish beginning in kindergarten and Latin benefits of horses to worksites and organizations through Southwest starting in sixth grade.

In addition to the four core academic areas, Florida, including hospitals, schools, hospices, nursing homes, and NCA also offers world languages, western civilization, music, and rehabilitation centers. visualVisit arts.www.naplestherapeuticridingcenter.org.

The high school curriculum incorporates government, economics, and moral philosophy. High schoolers also receive college counseling and readiness preparation, have dual enrollment Left: Camryn Ramsey with miniature horse Toulmin. opportunities, and can participate in various sports and clubs.

Visit https://naplesclassical.org.

A

New Classical Charter School Opens Its Doors in Naples

N Melissa Whitworth as Maria with the von Trapp children in Broadway Palm Dinner Theatre’s current production of The Sound of Music.

‘The Sound of Music’ at Broadway Palm Through Nov. 20

T

he family classic The Sound of Music is playing at the Broadway Palm Dinner Theatre in Fort Myers through Nov. 20. Performances are Wednesday through Sunday evenings with selected matinees. Beginning Nov. 2, performances are Tuesday through

Happy kids. Sparkly smiles.

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NEAPOLITANfamily • January 2021 NEAPOLITANfamily • November

COLLIER COUNTY PUBLIC SCHOOLS

C

By Jennifer L. Kupiec

Pinecrest Elementary Achieves ‘A’ Rating

ollier County can be proud of its public school system.

Continuing a streak dating back to 2017, Collier County Public Schools once again has earned an ‘A’ rating in the state’s school rating system. The state accountability system focuses on school and district performance outcomes: student achievement, learning gains, graduation, acceleration success, and maintaining a focus on students who need the most support.

“Achieving ‘A’ rated status yet again is a significant accomplishment given the disrupted learning from the previous two school years,” proudly states Superintendent Kamela Patton, Ph.D. “This reflects the incredible work of our teachers and leaders during a very challenging year.”

Out of our traditional public schools, 21 of 51 (41%) CCPS schools earned an A and none earned a grade of D or F. Of special significance, both Pinecrest and Village Oaks elementary schools earned grades of A and C, respectively, removing them from the state’s list of low-performing schools.

When asked about Pinecrest’s success, Principal Laura Mendicino explains, “It’s all about having the systems in place. We put very strategic and very systemic systems in place from preK through fifth grade. When we are all focused on the right work, we expedite the closing of the achievement gap.”

Those systems included a combination of tools such as the Leader in Me framework, collaborative planning blocks for teachers, student leadership notebooks, three-dimensional learning (see it, hear it, write it), and more.

“I think one of the biggest changes in the direction of the school was the implementation of Leader in Me, where we empower the kids to share their voice and share their work, and hold them to high expectations,” says Alicia Herrera, a fourth grade teacher at the school who grew up in Immokalee and attended Pinecrest as a child.

“We have to build relationships, and we have to understand where our children are coming from so we understand their needs,” Mendicino emphasizes. “We can then take that understanding and put systems in place that align with the whole child approach.”

At Pinecrest, every student is on a leadership team, which they choose for themselves based on their interests. “We’re developing smaller groups of kids with a stronger connection, where they’re able to bond over a passion with an adult who is also passionate about that and share those really enriching life experiences that they may not get outside of school,” says Ashleigh Dean, Pinecrest’s school counselor. “It has been an incredible experience watching this grow and have all stakeholders learn that they are an important piece to this puzzle.”

Dean adds, “We know as adults, when we feel valued in NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

Pinecrest Elementary School Principal Laura Mendicino (front) shares with students the news that their school’s rating jumped from a ‘D’ to an ‘A’ in just one year.

the workplace, it makes us want to give more and work harder.

Our children are wired the same way. When they feel loved and appreciated, they have that inner confidence. They want to work harder for us.”

“Our whole campus is leading the way now, and that’s one of our paradigm shifts we had to have,” concludes Mendicino.

“It went from leadership at the top 10% to leadership of all, and when everyone is focused on that, you move mountains.”

To find a listing of all school grades and district test results, visit www.collierschools.com/Page/480.

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YOUR FAMILY’S HEALTH

A

By Douglas Halbert, M.D., Healthcare Network

s a parent, you probably feel overwhelmed with information on how to keep your child healthy. When it comes to health conditions such as diabetes, do you know where to begin? In recognition of National Diabetes Month, here are the basic facts parents should know about diabetes.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 34.2 million Americans have diabetes. The majority of the people diagnosed with this chronic health condition are adults, but the rise of childhood obesity has caused people to develop diabetes at an earlier age. Another factor that has contributed to this increase is COVID-19. With extended time at home and online, long periods of inactivity and stress, a growing number of children are gaining excess weight.

While Type 1 diabetes (T1D) is most commonly diagnosed in children, teens, and young adults, only approximately 5% to 10% of people with diabetes have T1D. The majority have Type 2 diabetes (T2D). In the past, T2D rarely was diagnosed in adolescents and children. A study conducted by the CDC in 2019 revealed that nearly 1 in 5 adolescents ages 12 to 18 years are living with prediabetes, an emerging condition in which blood sugar levels are elevated but are not high enough to be considered

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What Parents Should Know About Diabetes T2D. If no lifestyle changes occur, people who are prediabetic likely will go on to develop T2D. Let’s break it down T1D is an autoimmune disease in which a person’s own immune system attacks and destroys cells in the pancreas that make insulin, the hormone that helps converts food into energy.

Symptoms typically develop quickly. Knowing what to look for can be lifesaving. Pay close attention if your child appears drowsier or thirstier than usual, has an abnormal appetite or “fruity” smelling breath, or is experiencing unexplainable weight loss, strange changes in their behavior, or urinating more frequently. It’s important to talk to your doctor if you notice any of these symptoms or suspect your child might have T1D. When a child is diagnosed with T1D it can be stressful and disconcerting. A child with T1D will depend on daily insulin injections or have to wear an insulin pump to ensure their blood sugar levels are within a normal range. It also will mean parents must carefully monitor their child’s food intake, do regular blood sugar checks, and be vigilant for hypoglycemia (low blood sugar), which can be caused by taking the wrong dose of insulin, missing

NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

A great local resource for parents of children with Type 1 diabetes is Help a Diabetic Child. The nonprofit organization hosts educational sessions and camps, and provides diabetes medical supplies, insulin, medical office visits, and mental health services for families struggling to afford these services.

a meal, or not keeping track of carbohydrates accurately, among other things.

T2D develops over many years, and about 90% to 95% of people with diabetes have this type. In the past, it was known as adult-onset diabetes because it was most commonly diagnosed in adults due to its slow and gradual development. However, with the obesity epidemic, children are now at higher risk of developing T2D. With T2D, a person still produces insulin, but it often is not enough. The person also may become insulin resistant, causing sugar to build in the blood.

Prevention is key with T2D. If your child is overweight, has a family history of diabetes, is in their early teens, and does not exercise regularly consider talking to your pediatric provider about their risk for developing T2D. Girls and African Americans, Hispanic/Latinos, Native American/Alaska Natives, Asian Americans, and Pacific Islanders also are at a higher risk of developing T2D. If your child has T2D, you will need to help your child maintain a normal weight, eat healthy foods, get regular physical activity, monitor blood sugar levels for hyperglycemia (high blood sugar) or hypoglycemia (low blood sugar), and, if necessary, take insulin or other medicines to help manage the condition. Life with T2D is not easy; there are many stigmas associated with the diagnosis, and it requires lifestyle changes that might make children feel isolated from their peers.

on the right path. Look for support groups, empower yourself by learning about the disease, and talk openly with your child about the diagnosis. Be positive and honest – let your child know they are not alone, and listen to their concerns. Over time you and your child will begin to understand and feel more comfortable with properly managing diabetes. Medical costs can be another stressful point. Nonprofits like Help a Diabetic Child in Naples (https://helpadiabeticchild.org) work to ensure children in need have access to insulin and other essential diabetes medical supplies.

While diabetes is a chronic condition, it can be managed through healthy lifestyle choices and medication, if needed. A child with diabetes can go on to live a healthy, bright and full life.

Living with diabetes In the beginning, it can all seem foreign and complicated, but talking to your doctor to create a care plan will help you start

DOUGLAS HALBERT, M.D., is a board-certified pediatrician with Healthcare Network. Visit www.healthcareswfl.org or call 239-658-3000.

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13

MENTAL HEALTH

By Leigh Ann Newman

Coping With Grief During the Holidays T

he holiday season can be a magical time filled with special moments with family and friends. But for anyone who has lost a loved one, this can be the most difficult time of year, as coping with grief becomes even more daunting when it seems like the rest of the world is celebrating.

Neapolitan Family talked with Trish Childress from Avow about grief during the holidays. Childress is Avow’s director of supportive services and has been working with families dealing with grief for more than 25 years. She provides sage advice on what we can do to help someone grieving during this time, and how to deal with our own grief.

Listen. “Allow the person to share the memories of the people they’ve lost,” says Childress. “We don’t bring up death because we think it will upset them. They are already upset. Give people the space to share and express themselves. Asking about traditions and family memories will encourage healing.” Share your memories, too, and don’t shy away from the funny stories. “Humor is a tool for coping,” she says. “It’s okay to laugh, and it’s okay to cry, and sometimes we get that in the same sentence.”

Offer specific help. This time of year is so busy, and someone who is grieving already is stressed. The many tasks that come with the season can overwhelm someone experiencing grief. Childress recommends avoiding the common refrains: “If there is anything I can do” or “Call me if you need anything.” Instead, offer to take on specific duties, such as shopping, gift wrapping, or shipping packages.

If the grieving person always bakes pies for a holiday meal, offer to

make them yourself or supply the ingredients or assist with the baking.

If they are hosting friends and family, offer to come early and stay late to help. If the person attends religious services, offer to go with them. “There are so many simple things you can do to make people feel supported,” she says.

Be sure to ask if the person is comfortable having you perform a task. For example, “Some people might not want you to clean up,” Childress points out. “It’s about tapping into the sensitivity of the situation.”

If your offer is rejected, suggest an alternative, but don’t keep pushing them to accept, she advises.

Encourage rest. Grief brings on physical exhaustion, Childress says. “If a person is saying no to activities or events, they could be physically exhausted. With grief, people say ‘Stay positive, move on, remember the good times.’ That’s not comforting to us in the midst of our grief,” she says. “Every situation is different, but recognize that keeping one busy is not diverting someone from their grief. We don’t want to divert grief.”

Just be there. Childress says that offering to simply sit with someone grieving can be the most comforting thing you can do, even when you don’t know what to say. “I think the gift of being present is something that is immeasurable.”

Helping a child grieve A child grieving during the holidays has different needs than an adult, and those needs also are age-dependent.

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“Children grieve differently at different developmental milestones,” Childress explains. For small children, adults have to be careful to leave the magic in Christmas without making the death of a loved mystical. To successfully walk this tightrope, she suggests using concrete terms when talking about death with young kids.

“If we say we lost someone or they are in heaven, that can be very confusing for children,” she explains. “Santa is mystical but can’t bring back Mommy, Grandpa, or our pet. Parents want to make it all better, but our wording doesn’t make it better – it confuses them.

Kids still have magical thinking, and they don’t have capability to understand that we lost Grandpa. They want to go find Grandpa.

Children also can’t grasp the concept of heaven at a young age.”

Take the time to talk with relatives who may be visiting during the holidays about what terms you are using and how you have approached the topic of death with your child. “We still have grandparents who don’t use the words death, dying, or dead. Make the phone call ahead of time and say the child is grieving, and tell them what you are doing, so that you have that consistency among the adults,” Childress says.

For small children, she advises to be in the moment with them.

“They might be tearful one second, and asking to open a gift in the next minute,” she says, adding that “I don’t feel there’s a vast difference in holiday time for them.”

Adolescents require more of an adult approach, and should be encouraged to talk about their grief and memories. They also can be involved with honoring their deceased loved one by establishing soothing rituals, such as lighting a candle, visiting the cemetery, or suggesting their own ideas.

Coping with your own grief If you are the one who is grieving, Childress advises sharing your pain and experience with others. “Find that channel of family or friends to share your story.” If your family and friends are not supportive of this, “reach out to a professional to express yourself,” she recommends.

Support groups can help, too. “For someone who has lost a spouse, support groups are important,” she says. “People feel as though they can’t bring up a deceased spouse when they socialize with friends who are couples.” Or an adult child will tell a parent that it makes them too sad to talk about their deceased parent.

Regardless of who you are able to share with, Childress says it is important to tell your story, even if it contains sadness and guilt.

Many people harbor feelings of guilt – things they feel they should have done while their loved one was alive. “If you need to confront guilt, express those feelings,” she advises.

And, when well-intentioned friends extend invitations or offer help, “give yourself space to say no,” Childress says. “Allow yourself time to be able to rest from the physical and emotional exhaustion that you have.”

Gift that honor If you are struggling for gift ideas for someone who is grieving, Childress suggests doing something that honors the deceased, such as a planting a tree, printing and framing a special photo, or taking flowers to the cemetery. Or purchase a small gift that reflects a special interest of the deceased. If the person grieving enjoys reading, a book about grief is a good option. To the right is a list of books on grief and bereavement recommended by Avow.

NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

The important thing to remember is that what comforts one person doesn’t necessarily comfort another. Take the time to ask your loved one what support they need.

“Grief is different for all of us, and we need to be sensitive to that,” Childress says. “Grief is so subjective, and there is no true timeline for that.”

Avow is a Naples-based nonprofit provider of hospice, palliative care, and grief support services. The Avow Kids program, designed for children ages 5-17, provides support for kids who are grieving. Avow also helps kids process and heal from other types of loss, including divorce, the loss of a friend, instability in the foster care system, and deployed parents and family members. Avow Kids hold in-person sessions, workshops, and camps in SWFL and online groups open to children and teens worldwide. There is never a cost for care. Visit https://avowcares.org or call 239-261-4404.

Recommended Reading

• Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy, by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant • The Year of Magical Thinking, by Joan Didion • Resilient Grieving: Finding Strength and Embracing Life After a Loss That Changes Everything, by Lucy Hone, Ph.D. • I Wasn’t Ready to Say Goodbye: Surviving, Coping, and Healing After the Sudden Death of a Loved One,

by Brook Noel and Pamela D. Blair, Ph.D. • A Grief Observed, by C.S. Lewis • On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss, by Elisabeth Kubler Ross and David Kessler • Please Be Patient. I’m Grieving: How to Care For and Support the Grieving Heart, by Gary Roe • When Bad Things Happen to Good People, by Harold S. Kushner • When Things Fall Apart, by Perna Chodron • It’s OK That You’re Not OK, by Megan Devine • Bearing the Unbearable: Love, Loss, and the Heartbreaking Path of Grief, by Joanne Cacciatore, Ph.D. • The Other Side of Sadness: What the New Science of Bereavement Tells Us About Life After Loss, by George A. Bonanno • How To Go On Living When Someone You Love Dies,

by Therese A. Rando, Ph.D. • Healing the Adult Sibling’s Grieving Heart: 100 Practical Ideas after Your Brother or Sister Dies, by Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D. • The Empty Room: Understanding Sibling Loss, by Elizabeth DeVita-Raeburn • Surviving the Death of a Sibling: Living Through Grief When an Adult Brother or Sister Dies, by T.J. Wray • The Orphaned Adult: Understanding and Coping with Grief and Change After the Death of Our Parents, by Alexander Levy neafamily.com

15

OUT & ABOUT The Sound of Music

Registration required. Located at South Regional Library, 8065 Lely Cultural Pkwy., Naples. Call 239-252-7542 or check www.collierlibrary.org.

11 a.m. Preschool Story Time. Stories, songs, finger plays, and a craft or activity every week. Ages 3-5 years. Registration is required. Located at Headquarters Library, 2385 Orange Blossom Dr., Naples.

Check www.collierlibrary.org or call 239252-7370.

3 WEDNESDAY

in November 2021 1 MONDAY 10 a.m. & 2 p.m. Little Learners.

Daily for ages 2-7. Stories, rhymes, songs, and fun. Located at C’mon, 15080 Livingston Rd., Naples. Call 239-514-0084 or check cmon.org.

10:30 a.m. Family Story Time & Craft. Stories, songs, and a craft for children of all ages and caregivers. Registration is not required. Located at Golden Gate Library, 2432 Lucerne Rd., Naples.

Check www.collierlibrary.org or call 239252-4549.

2 TUESDAY 10 a.m. Diversity Story Time. For ages 2-5 (with parents). Hear stories and participate in activities that instill a value for 16

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diversity, foster cultural respect, and provide positive LGBTQ experiences. Located at Naples Pride Center, 2248 Airport Pulling Rd. S., Naples. Call 239-3049407 or check www.naplespride.org.

10 a.m. Family Story Time. Stories, songs, and hands-on activities. Registration is not required. Located at Immokalee Library, 417 N. First St., Immokalee. call 239252-7073 or check www.collierlibrary.org.

10 a.m. Toddler Story Time. Ages birth to 3 years. Stories, songs, and finger plays every week. Registration is required.

Located at Headquarters Library, 2385 Orange Blossom Dr., Naples. Check www. collierlibrary.org or call 239-252-7371.

10:30 a.m. Family Story Time.

Stories, songs, and hands-on activities.

9 a.m. Safari Squad. Wednesdays and Saturdays. Members-only. Animal encounter, reading, art, and play stations.

November’s theme is “Meet the Relatives.”

No class the week of Nov. 21. Located at Naples Zoo, 1590 Goodlette-Frank Rd., Naples. Call 239-262-5409 or check www.napleszoo.org.

10 a.m. Toddler Story Time. Stories, songs, and activities for ages 16-35 months.

Registration is not required. Located at Estates Library, 1266 Golden Gate Blvd.

W., Naples. Check www.collierlibrary.org or call 239-252-7109.

10:30 a.m. Preschool Story Time.

Stories, activities, and an art project for children ages 3-5. Registration is not required.

Located at Estates Library, 1266 Golden Gate Blvd. W., Naples. Call 239-2527109 or check www.collierlibrary.org.

10:30 a.m. Toddler/Preschool Story Time. Stories, songs, rhymes, and other fun activities to engage little hands and bodies. Ages 18 months to 5 years.

Located at Vanderbilt Beach Library, 788 Vanderbilt Beach Rd., Naples. Call 239252-7160 or check www.collierlibrary. org.

NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

7:30 p.m. The Sound of Music.

Select dates through Nov. 20. Located at Broadway Palm Dinner Theatre, 1380 Colonial Blvd., Fort Myers. For tickets or more information, call 239-278-4422 or check https://broadwaypalm.com.

Coco and decorate your own paper craft mask. Materials and snack provided, while supplies last. Registration is not required.

Located at Immokalee Library, 417 N. First St., Immokalee. Check www.collierlibrary. org or call 239-252-7073.

4 THURSDAY

3:30 p.m. Lego Club. Be creative, make new friends, and have fun. Bricks provided. Ages 5-11. Registration is not required. Located at Marco Island Library, 210 S. Heathwood Dr., Marco Island.

Check www.collierlibrary.org or call 239252-7064.

10 a.m. Mall Mutts. Meet the adoptable and adorable pups from the Gulf Coast Humane Society as they stroll the mall. Located at Miromar Outlets, 10801 Corkscrew Rd., Estero. Call 239-9483766 or visit www.miromaroutlets.com.

10:30 a.m. Family Story Time. Stories, songs, and a craft for children of all ages and caregivers. Registration not required.

Located at Marco Island Library, 210 S. Heathwood Dr., Marco Island. Check www.collierlibrary.org or call 239-2527064.

10:30 a.m. & 3:30 p.m. ¡Celebremos Dia De Los Muertos! Listen to a picture book, celebrate families, and learn the history of Dia de los Muertos. See the movie

5 FRIDAY 10 a.m. Naples Train Museum and Train Rides. Open Fridays and Saturdays. Admission to museum includes unlimited train rides. Located at Naples Lionel Train Museum, 1051 Fifth Ave. S., Naples.

Email naplestrainmuseum@comcast.net or check www.naplestrainmuseum.org.

6:30 p.m. Buddy Break Respite Program for Kids With Special Needs. Three-hour monthly session of

Buddy Break

free care for children with special needs and their siblings. Crafts, games, movies, special activities. Registration required for volunteers and participants. Located at Grow Church, 15300 Tamiami Tr. N., Naples. Call 240-893-7072 or check https://growchurch.com/buddy-break.

8 p.m. Cowboys & Constellations.

Join us as we explore major constellations and share tips about how to navigate and tell time like cowboys. Free. Located at Immokalee Pioneer Museum at Roberts Ranch, 1215 Roberts Ave. W., Immokalee.

Check https://colliermuseums.com or call 239-252-2611.

A lifelong joy of learning, An education for life.

INFANT TODDLER CHILDREN’S HOUSE VPK ELEMENTARY

Call to schedule a private tour

239-597-2255

More information can be found on our website

www.naplesmontessori.org 2655 Northbrooke Drive Naples, Florida 34119 License #C20CO0132

Daily hours from 7:30 A.M. to 5:30 P.M. NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

We buy & sell gently used kids stuff • Clothing (newborn to size 16), toys, baby furniture, equipment, and more.

• We pay cash on the spot.

• No appointment necessary; clothes must be freshly laundered and brought in a plastic container.

13560 Tamiami Trail N. #4, Naples

239-596-6096

Also in: Fort Myers at 239-274-0039 Port Charlotte at 941-764-8121

www.onceuponachildnaples.com neafamily.com

17

Spinal Health is imperative for a healthy life

Looking after your, and your families health, also includes keeping check of your spinal health. Just 11:30 a.m. Saturday Movie Matinee Naples. Check https://cclandkeepers. like we check things like our child's–teeth, eyes and ears, it’s important com to pay attention to any Adventures of Rufus: The Fantastic or call 239-308-0281. changes in their spines. Regular checks canPG. help withRegistration early detection of any spinal issues, which Pet. Rated All ages. is not required.

Located at Immokalee Library, includes scoliosis. All girls should be checked before the age of 10 and boys before 12.

10 WEDNESDAY 417kyphosis N. First St.,issues Immokalee.

We also treat adults for scoliosis and thatCheck havewww. gone uncorrected and worsened 3 p.m. Lego Fun. Share ideas, be crecollierlibrary.org or call 239-252-7073. over the years. ative, and have fun. Bricks provided. All 8 p.m. Family-friendly Comedy. Get Dr. T Foster Bryant ready make to laugh until it hurts with Stage 2 Early detection & treatment can South Florida’s Premier ScoliCare Provider all the difference

ages. No registration required. Located at Immokalee Library, 417 N. First St., Immokalee. Check www.collierlibrary.org Improv. Located at The Naples Players, 701 Early detection and then early intervention leads to better patient outcomes including wider or call 239-252-7073.

Fifth Ave. S., Naples.

Call 239-263-7990 Diggity Dog Festival opportunities for treatment. Particularly for children or adolescents who are rapidly growing, or older or check https://naplesplayers.org.

adults with pain and decreased quality of life, earlier detection can provide access to a range of Spinal Health is imperative for a healthy life 6 SATURDAY 11 THURSDAY non-surgical scoliosis treatment options including modern 3D bracing andofexercise programs, Just 7 SUNDAY Looking after your, and your families health, also includes keeping check your spinal 9 a.m. Diggity Dog Festival. Dog 12 & 2 p.m.

Free health.

Cruises for Vetleading to incredibler treatment outcomes. Our approach uses the latest technological advanced

like weand check things ourfrom child's10 teeth, andWith ears,Girl it’s Scouts. important erans. to payVeterans attention any products services, andlike demos andtoactive-duty service a.m.eyes Fall Fun system and NOT traditional bracing that does not have corrective outcomes. local vendors.

Food trucks, DJ, and raffles. members cruise for free when accompanied Free event.

Take a journey through camp changes in their spines. Regular checks can help with early detection of any spinal issues, which Located at Goldentreatment Community anditchecked enjoy back yourbefore choice of hands-on ac- and The traditional isshould wait until gets enough for surgeryYIKES! includes scoliosis.Gate All girls be the age of 10 boys before 12.

Park, 3300 Santa Barbara Blvd., Naples. tivities and experiences. Fun for all ages.

We also treat adults for scoliosis and kyphosis issues that have gone uncorrected and worsened Check www.collierparks.com or call 239Located at Camp Caloosa, 19931 FL-31, 252-6128. over the years.

North Fort Myers. Check www.gsgcf.org or call 941-921-5358.

9TOP a.m.20 Nature Explorers.

A drop-off SCOLIBRACE PROVIDERS IN THE THE WORLD Early detection treatment can make theCenter difference environmental education & program.

Ages 12PEDIATRIC p.m.

Gore all Nature Grand INTERNATIONAL CHIROPRACTIC CERTIFIED Early detection then early better outcomes including wider 5-1 1. $10.

Located and at Calusa Natureintervention Opening.leads Exploretoour trails, patient peruse our POSTURE AND SPINAL DEFORMITY FOCUS Center & Planetarium, 3450 Ortiz Ave., pollinator gardens, and crafts andwho are rapidly growing, or older opportunities for treatment.

Particularly for children or enjoy adolescents Fort Myers.

Check www.calusanature.org activities.

Admission is free; donations areprovide access to a range of adults with pain and decreased quality of life, earlier detection can Free Cruises for Veterans or call 239-275-3435. welcome. Located at 4261 40th Ave S.E., non-surgical scoliosis treatment options including modern 3D bracing and exercise programs, leading to incredibler treatment outcomes. Our approach uses the latest technological advanced system and NOT traditional bracing that does not have corrective outcomes.

The traditional treatment is wait until it gets back enough for surgery- YIKES!

Corrective, Non-surgical Treatment for Scoliosis

TOP 20 SCOLIBRACE PROVIDERS IN THE THE WORLD INTERNATIONAL CHIROPRACTIC PEDIATRIC CERTIFIED POSTURE ANDedit SPINAL DEFORMITY s Add-ons Help Last was made 1 hour ago byFOCUS Erin Bryant Image options 1

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Dr. T. Foster Bryant has been taking care of the Naples community for 18 years and providing long-term results for his patients.

He believes in FIND IT EARLY and FIX IT EARLY. Just as we have our children's teeth, eyes and hearing checked – we must check their spine! We want to ensure the healthiest version of them imaginable.

Mention this ad for 6291Dr.Naples Blvd., Naples • https://movmntnaples.com T Foster Bryant 18

South Florida’s Premier ScoliCare Provider

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Spinal Health is imperative for a healthy life

50% OFF

your first 2 visits.

NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

Ave. W., Immokalee. Call 239-252-2611 or check https://colliermuseums.com.

by full-fare paid adult or child admission.

Located at Pure Florida, Tin City Docks, Naples. Call 239-263-4949 or visit www. purefl.com.

12 FRIDAY 9 a.m. Collier County Appreciation Days. Friday and Saturday. Free timed admission tickets for Collier County residents. Tickets must be reserved, starting Nov. 8. Located at Naples Zoo, 1590 Goodlette-Frank Rd., Naples. Call 239315-7626 or check www.napleszoo.org.

5 p.m. Naples Balloon Glow. Hot air balloons (weather permitting), food, kids’ zone, vendors, and more. Located at Collier Fair, 751 39th Ave. N.E., Naples. Call 239455-1444 or visit https://collierfair.com.

6 p.m. Kids’ Night Out. Thanksgivingthemed evening of games, activities, dinner, a movie. $10 per child. Ages 5-11.

Located at Donna Fiala Eagle Lakes Community Park, 11565 Tamiami Tr. E., Naples.

Visit www.collierparks.com or call 239252-3527.

Naples Balloon Glow

13 SATURDAY 10 a.m. Fall Community Day. Handson activities, musical performances, and more. Free. Located at Artis-Naples, 5833 Pelican Bay Blvd., Naples. Call 239-5971900 or visit https://artisnaples.org.

10 a.m. Holiday Art and Craft Market. Find one-of-a-kind presents for the holidays from local makers. Located at Our Savior Lutheran Church, 1955 Curling Ave., Naples. Call 239-597-4091 or visit https://www.oslcnaples.org/market.

10 a.m. Preschool Program: Fall Fun. Harvest-themed activities. Located at Immokalee Pioneer Museum, 1215 Roberts

11 a.m. LGBTQ+ Youth Group. This is a safe space for those in grades 6-12. Located at Naples Pride Center, 2248 Airport Pulling Rd. S., Naples. Call 239-3049407 or check www.naplespride.org.

11 a.m. Local Author Book Fair. Meet 54 local authors. Taco truck, readings, and crafts and activities for kids. Located at South Regional Library, 8065 Lely Cultural Pkwy., Naples. Visit www.collierlibrary.org or call 239-252-7542.

1 p.m. 3rd Annual WolfStock. Live music, food trucks, and craft breweries.

Benefits Shy Wolf Sanctuary. Located at Paradise Coast Sports Complex, 3940 City Gate Rd. N., Naples. Call 239-749-9653 or visit https://shywolfsanctuary.org.

1 p.m. World Kindness Day Craft.

Make a kindness card for someone you know. Located at Golden Gate Library, 2432 Lucerne Rd., Naples. Check www. collierlibrary.org or call 239-252-4542.

WWW.TEMPLESHALOMPRESCHOOLNAPLES.ORG

Baby & Me

Baby & Me

Mondays and Fridays 9:00am-11:00am 0-2 Year Olds

bl

Sensory Activities - Baby Sign Language Music - Storytime - Yoga - Tummy Time - Bonding For more information or to schedule a tour: 239-455-3227 preschool@naplestemple.org

Mondays ONLY: $130/month Fridays ONLY: $130/month Mondays and Fridays: $200/month

NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

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19

3 p.m. Pups ‘n’ Books. Stop by to read to a dog or just pet one. All ages. Registration is not required. Located at Vanderbilt Beach Library, 788 Vanderbilt Beach Rd., Naples. Check www.collierlibrary.org or call 239-252-7160.

14 SUNDAY 7 p.m. Naples Philharmonic Youth Orchestra Free Concert. Tickets are free but must be reserved in advance. Located at Artis-Naples, 5833 Pelican Bay Blvd., Naples. Call 239-597-1900 or visit https://artisnaples.org.

16 TUESDAY 2 p.m. Bridgerton High Tea. Channel your inner duchess for an afternoon celebration of all things Regency and romantic with afternoon tea, a flower arranging demonstration, and Bridgerton trivia.

Gowns, gloves, and tiaras are optional.

Registration is required. Located at Headquarters Library, 2385 Orange Blossom Dr., Naples. Check www.collierlibrary.org or call 239-252-7356.

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5:45 p.m. Movies on the Lawn – Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle.

Gates open at 4:45 p.m. Food available for purchase. All Mercato events are subject to change due to weather. Located at Mercato Shops, Naples. Call 239-2541080 or visit www.mercatoshops.com.

18 THURSDAY 4 p.m. Lego Fun. Bricks provided. Ages 4-11. Registration is not required. Located at Estates Library, 1266 Golden Gate Blvd. W., Naples. Call 239-252-7109 or check www.collierlibrary.org.

4 p.m. Marco Island Winter Wonderland. Enjoy Christmas, Florida-style.

Photos with Santa, Christmas carols, and shopping at the gift shop. Located at Marco Island Historical Museum, 180 S. Heathwood Dr., Marco Island. Check https://colliermuseums.com or call 239252-1440.

4:30 p.m. Modern Table Manners and Proper Etiquette. For grades 6-12. Learn how to set a proper table,

Marco Island Winter Wonderland

then practice newly refined table manners.

Other etiquette topics will be covered.

Registration required. Located at Immokalee Library, 417 N. First St., Immokalee.

Check www.collierlibrary.org or call 239252-7073.

7 p.m. PFLAG Naples. Every third Thursday. A safe, loving, nonjudgmental, and supportive environment for the parents, family, and friends of LGBTQ+ people. Located at Naples Pride Center, 2248 Airport Pulling Rd. S., Naples. Call 239304-9407 or check www.naplespride. org.

NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

19 FRIDAY

24 WEDNESDAY

4 p.m. Avow Kids Open House. Stop into Aunt Janet’s House for a fun and interactive meet-and-greet. Check out the Glow Room, play foosball, table tennis, volleyball, corn hole, spike ball, and can jam. Activity stations, crafts, snacks. Stay for Finding Nemo at 6 p.m. RSVP to avowkids@ avowcares.org or 239-261-4404. Located at Avow, 1301 Whippoorwill Ln., Naples.

Visit https://avowcares.org.

11:30 a.m. Farm City BBQ. Celebrate our farmers and community, and support our next generation of leaders while you eat delicious BBQ. Located at Immokalee Pioneer Museum at Roberts Ranch, 1215 Roberts Ave. W., Immokalee. Call 239-5713174 or check https://farmcitybbq.com.

20 SATURDAY 10 a.m. Free Family Art Lab. Come ready to imagine and create. Free. Located at Alliance for the Arts, 10091 McGregor Blvd., Fort Myers. Call 239-939-2787 or check www.artinlee.org.

10 a.m. Thanksgiving Craft: Placemat. Make a custom placemat to use at Thanksgiving dinner. All ages. Registration required. Located at Headquarters Library, 2385 Orange Blossom Dr., Naples. Check www.collierlibrary.org or call 239-252-7369.

Farm City BBQ

11 a.m. Immokalee Pop-Up Shop.

Shop unique and locally made items. Located at Immokalee Community Park, 321 N. First St., Immokalee. Call 239-2524449 or visit www.collierparks.com.

1:30 p.m. Pups ‘n’ Books. Stop by to read to a dog or just pet one. All ages. Registration is not required. Located at Headquarters Library, 2385 Orange Blossom Dr., Naples. Check www.collierlibrary.org or call 239-252-7370.

2 p.m. Teen Book Bingo. Bring a friend and win some prizes. Ages 1117. No registration required. Located at Immokalee Library, 417 N. First St., Immokalee. Check www.collierlibrary.org or call 239-252-7073.

29 MONDAY 5 p.m. Community-wide Chanukah Celebration. Come listen to music, buy some latkes, and enjoy the festivities. Hosted by the Jewish Federation of Greater Naples. Located at Mercato Shops, Naples. Call 239-263-4205 or visit https:// jewishnaples.org.

30 TUESDAY 3:30 p.m. Family Game Night. Bring your favorite family game to share. All ages.

Registration is not required. Located at Immokalee Library, 417 N. First St., Immokalee. Check www.collierlibrary.org or call 239-252-7073.

Currently Enrolling – Register Today!!

Providing a loving environment for children while offering parents and caregivers a needed break.

Opening February 2022 KNIGHT TRACK & FIELD COMPLEX

One- and Two-Day Options Available Monday-Thursday, 9 a.m. – 12:30 p.m.

Ages 2-4 years by Aug. 1

6926 Trail Blvd., Naples, FL The Village School provides an

The Village School of Naples

EMPOWERS and INSPIRES students to think and CREATE solutions to challenges in

environment that

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an ever-changing world.

Are you ready to become a Knight for Life?

NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

239.597.3464

For more information, email momsmorningout@covenantnaples.com. neafamily.com

21

THANKSGIVING

By Jill Morgenstern

8 Ways to Encourage Thankfulness

A

s Thanksgiving approaches it is natural to be thinking about gratefulness and how to encourage it in our kids. According to Harvard Health, gratitude is associated with greater overall happiness, can help people deal with adversity, and even aid in forming strong relationships. These are qualities we want for our children all year long!

How do we cultivate a sense of gratitude in our children? Christine Carter in her book Raising Happiness says, “Gratitude is a learned skill to be practiced like kicking a soccer ball or speaking French.” Here are eight ways you can help to build that skill in your child: 1. Be a good role model Model “please” and “thank you” just the way you’d want to see it in your children. Children are keen observers of how you treat others in your life and naturally will follow your lead. When eating out, for example, your server may or may not notice whether you thank them as they present your meal, but your children definitely will.

The importance of being a good role model cannot be overstated and may be one of the most important ways to encourage gratitude, so keep your thank yous at the ready.

2. Volunteer Volunteering can contribute to wellbeing in multiple ways, including increasing self-confidence, providing a sense of purpose, and even improving physical health. There also is evidence to suggest that volunteering increases both gratitude and happiness. But there are even more benefits to volunteering.

Depending on the activity, kids are given the opportunity to learn essential skills and increase their sense of responsibility.

3. Chores Believe it or not, doing chores can increase gratitude. By participating in housework, children get a firsthand look at what it takes to run a household. This can raise their awareness of what is being done for them on a day-to-day basis and can awaken a sense of gratitude.

Photo by Monica Alvarez

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4. Encourage thank you notes Hand-written thank you notes seem NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

to be going out of style as our forms of communication become almost exclusively electronic. However, there still is something quite meaningful about writing and receiving a thank you the old fashioned way. If your child resists, try making sure they write a thank you note before using a gift. This will encourage even the most reluctant child to complete the notes.

5. Count your blessings Whether at dinner or as a bedtime routine, each night have your children recount the best parts of their day. This can be a reminder that even a bad day had good points and help end the day on a positive note.

7. Extending thank you According to the Raising Grateful Children Project at University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, 85% of parents prompt their children to say thank you. But going beyond common manners can help increase gratitude. Try asking children how a gift makes them feel, or why they think they received the gift.

8. Look on the bright side Try looking for the positive when things get hard. Asking yourself or your child what good could come out of a hard thing can help you see the best in situations and increase gratitude. Next time things aren’t going as expected, try to point out the bright side to your children. It might be helpful to your own mood, too.

All of these skills can help build gratitude in your child, which can lead to a happier overall child as well as a more resilient one.

These are great skills to build not just at Thanksgiving but all year round.

JILL MORGENSTERN is a freelance writer, Jewish Sunday school teacher, and radio DJ. She has four children and a master’s degree in teaching reading.

Photo by Monica Alvarez

6. Work for it Children can learn not only gratitude from earning some of their own possessions, but also a sense of responsibility. When they have worked for a toy or other item, they have a better sense of its value, potentially increasing their gratitude not just for that item but for their other possessions as well.

Gratefulness Pumpkin Craft

S

et aside some time this month for a fun family project that will become a daily reminder of all of the things for which your family is grateful.

Purchase a light-colored artificial pumpkin at any local craft or big box store. You can use a real pumpkin, but those tend to spoil quickly in SWFL. If your artistic skills are solid, use paint pens to write “Give Thanks” or another appropriate phrase on the pumpkin. Or buy a stencil, like we did here at Neapolitan Family.

As a family, sit down to talk about all of the things you are thankful for. Use Sharpies or paint pens (or something less permanent for little ones) to write each item on the pumpkin. Kids who aren’t yet writing can draw a picture. Don’t worry about producing a perfect-looking pumpkin – focus on building this new family tradition. Keep the pumpkin on your dinner table so that your kids can add to it every day.

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Now accepting applications for enrollment, ages 2-5!

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VPK Provider No Wrap-Around Fees Creative Arts Letter People Handwriting without Tears

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Hands-On Learning Small Class Size Chapel Discovery & Exploration S.T.E.A.M.

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(239) 649-1811 neafamily.com

23

YOUR MONEY

By Lissa Carlson

Do the Hustle Parenthood with a Side Gig Ready to dip your foot into the side gig pool? Five things to know before you dive in deep!

I

t’s a wonder more of us aren’t generating millions with the number of moneymaking schemes revealed by a simple “side gigs” search. Online promises aside, side gigs require commitment, time, and preparation.

The side job (or hustle, project, gig, or venture) has been around for decades, with the term moonlighting coined in the 1950s to indicate a second job performed during nontraditional working hours. Jennifer Nahrgang, professor of management and entrepreneurship at the University of Iowa and a Palmer professor at the Tippie College of Business, says technology has made it easier and improved access for people to participate in the side hustle culture (think Uber, Airbnb, Etsy, and the like).

While the gig economy has its critics, it is attractive to moms for its flexibility and autonomy. Nahrgang interviewed a gig worker who, due to health issues, could work only on days she felt well. A side gig versus traditional employment allowed her to do that.

And though making money is the obvious incentive for a side gig, it’s not the sole objective nor even the primary motivator for many of the moms we surveyed. Most gig workers are seeking 24

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to be free agents or casual supplemental earners (30-40%), while a smaller percentage chooses gig work out of necessity (14-16%) based on a 2016 report from McKinsey Global Institute.

Still, as satisfied as gig workers are with their work arrangements, financial volatility is a downside. How can you ensure your side gig is a success? Nahrgang was part of a small research team whose results of a study of 337 full-time employees with side hustles recently were published in the Academy of Management Journal (Vol. 64, No. 1, 2021). In addition to her expertise, we surveyed more than a dozen moms to glean the best side-gig practices for parents.

1. Know your motivations. What do you hope to gain besides cash? New skills? A creative outlet? A larger network of colleagues and friends? It’s helpful to know your motivations – it’s empowering, Nahrgang says.

Samantha Peterson’s cookie decorating hobby during COVID-19 quickly turned side hustle. A mother of three girls ages 5 to 16, Peterson found herself sometimes lonely and without purpose, even with a part-time position as a court clerk. “I thought if I could make extra

money doing what I’m passionate about, it would be a win-win,” she says.

Laura Luidahl, also a baker, was seeking a creative outlet when money and time were tight and her kids were preschoolers. Baking filled that gap, plus ingredients counted as grocery money.

Her boys are now 13 and 16, and her side gig is a full-time venture. “The fact that people were willing to pay me to bake for them was ‘icing on the cake’ for me,” she laughs.

2. Do your research. Once you have nailed your motivations, look for the sweet spot where those intersect with your passions, talents, and available time. Will you provide a service? Utilize an app such as Uber? Or rely on a capital platform such as Etsy or Airbnb?

Consider the things you do every day that might have income opportunities attached. As a mystery shopper, you may need to check prices, take photos of displays, or conduct customer service checks. Is there a store you visit regularly seeking these services?

For 11 years, Lindsay Moe has found balance with family life as a food blogger at The Live-In Kitchen (easily customized vegetarian recipes). “Food NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

blogging incorporates beautifully into parenting,” Moe says. “With four kids at home I always have plenty of interesting food on hand for them to enjoy or expand their palettes. I can cook and photograph something during the day and serve it for dinner in the evening.”

Next, read the small print, Nahrgang says. Some opportunities are strict in their procedures, and you must follow them exactly in order to be paid.

If you’re considering a direct sales company, such as Avon, Pampered Chef, Tupperware, or Norwex, be clear about what you’re purchasing if there are fees for enrollment or initial kits, says direct-sales veteran Rita Koch-Thometz. In addition, Nahrgang advises not to invest anything beyond what you’re willing to lose.

Watch for pyramid schemes. Know and understand minimum sales expectations.

And beware of being lured by company incentives into more inventory than you need.

Be honest with yourself about whether you plan to treat the venture as a business, hobby, or simply a personal discount, Koch-Thometz says. Rachel Truax, mother of four, admits she initially became a Norwex consultant seven years ago for discounts on her purchases. Extra money from sales to others was just an added bonus until the pandemic hit and she found herself not only in need of income, but offering products especially appealing during COVID-19.

“If you want it to thrive as a business, you must treat it as a business,” KochThometz says.

Share your plans and goals with your family, she adds, who are much more

likely to encourage and support you if they are included and informed.

3. Be strategic. Nahrgang says the most successful folks at side gigs are strategic. They consider not just how much they’re earning but the amount of time it takes to make that money and at what expense. They shop the available opportunities (and sometimes take advantage of more than one, such as Uber and Lyft) and consider how they’ll get paid, Nahrgang says. And they know when they can maximize making money, whether it is certain hours of the day or times of the year.

Taking a strategic approach can significantly impact the bottom line for a side gig. One driver Nahrgang interviewed drove for two major companies, each offering incentives. The driver Nahrgang spoke with would carefully consider whether those incentives truly added value. For example, she might make more in tips on multiple short trips over the one long trip the company incentivized.

4. Set boundaries. Because the nature of side gigs provides few boundaries, the most successful set limits for when or how they will work, Nahrgang says.

Kelsey Lyons holds a stressful full-time position as a nurse. The mother of two boys ages 15 and 16, Lyons previously was a massage therapist and wood-burning artist, which now have become relaxing side gigs.

“It’s so calming to be in an environment that’s so different than my ‘real’ job,” Lyons says. “I don’t push my art or push my body to do more massages than I want to do. It’s got to be something you can manage and not create more stress. And time management is key.”

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You also can set boundaries financially.

Luidahl of Laura’s Baking Delights suggests setting up a separate bank account early on.

Deposit side-gig sales into that account, and purchase your supplies from it so you always have an accurate reflection of your income and expenses.

Support, whether it’s from your family or a Facebook group such as Side Hustle Nation, can help you keep your boundaries and priorities.

5. Feel the power; find the joy. Side gigs can make you more confident about your full-time work and parenthood, Nahrgang says. In reviewing responses from the moms we surveyed, their passion is contagious.

One social worker and mother became a wedding officiant when gay marriage was legalized in New York in 2011. “I just wanted to be part of that joy,” says Lauren Gourley of NYweddingsbylauren.com.

“I’ve officiated about 100 weddings at this point, some for dear friends but mostly for complete strangers.”

Kristy Honaker, mother of two boys ages 18 months and 11, has devoted herself to improving health, and her side gig reflects that passion. Hona Goods utilizes herbs, plants, flowers, and produce from Honaker’s home garden to create edible and wellness products, such as a lavender salve to soothe sore muscles.

Lastly, own your side gig. “Make it work for you,” says Truax, the Norwex consultant. “The perk of a side gig is you make it work for your own life.”

LISSA CARLSON found it humorous that her side gig this month is writing about side gigs.

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namicollier.org NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

Neapolitan Family’s 2021-22 Cover Kids Winners!

For the past two years, we have not been able to hold our annual Cover Kids contest in person.

While we miss meeting so many of our readers and your adorable children, it has been a joy to read your responses to the question on our entry form about what makes your child special.

However, seeing your kids through your eyes makes the impossible task of choosing just 12 covers even more difficult. In the future, we hope to be able to return to an in-person contest, but in the meantime, here are the cover models for our next 12 issues.

Mikayla

Carlos

Maryn

Sophia & D’Artagnan

Adeline

Ace

Ford & Francesca

Madeleine

Leo

Hanna, Addison, Hunter & Zachary

Maya

Rainey

NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

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TRAVEL

By Karen T. Bartlett Moe, Paco, and Taco, and a couple hundred of their parrot friends. Because the residents hadn’t yet received their treats, the unsalted almonds we brought from home made our little group pretty popular in the jungle. Among us was a Miami couple seeking insights about their newly adopted parrot, two animal activists, a traveling bird lover who was missing his pets, and a brother and sister ages 6 and 11. Here’s the scoop on this sanctuary and some others that touch my heart: Each one began in the heart of a woman who left the business world and dug into her savings to give them happy lives. I challenge you to not come away from any one of them with renewed spirit and a grin as wide as your face.

P.S. They’re animal sanctuaries, so there will be poop and dirt. Wear closedtoe shoes!

Destination: Animal Sanctuaries S

ometimes I sits and thinks. Sometimes I just sits.

Who said that? Winnie the Pooh?

Satchel Paige? I’m going with Hammy the potbellied pig, a resident of Rooterville Animal Sanctuary, but it could have been one of the thousands of rescued animals and birds living happily in sanctuaries throughout Florida. Some were bought as babies with good intentions to keep as pets but abandoned when (surprise!) they reached a few hundred pounds or ate the kids’ homework,

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backpack, and Nikes. Others fell off trucks headed for the slaughterhouse, or were suffering from untreated injuries and diseases.

Now they’re well fed, treated gently, and get veterinary care. Some of them slide down sliding boards, cuddle their favorite stuffed animals, and attend math classes.

Just kidding about that last one, but the rest is totally true, depending on the sanctuary.

Recently I visited The Bird Sanctuary of Naples to commune with Curly, Larry,

The Center for Great Apes Chimpanzees and orangutans raised in captivity for research, entertainment, or exotic pets and then abandoned or abused lack the survival skills to be released into the wild. Here, thanks to founder Patti Ragan and the generosity of donors, they live in three-story habitats in 100 acres of woods in Wauchula with aerial trailways, tunnels, chutes, and swinging vines. Physical therapy and special comforts are provided for older and handicapped residents like Knuckles, who has cerebral palsy.

Bubbles the baby chimpanzee, taken from his mother and exploited by Hollywood trainers, was Michael Jackson’s pet until he got too strong to handle. He loves to paint, and collectors can buy his paintings on the sanctuary website.

You can’t take one of the animals home, of course, but you can choose your fave from the website and adopt symbolically, or send a gift from the center’s Amazon wish list. Small group educational tours are given by advance reservation. Student groups range from $10 to $25 per attendee.

Visit www.centerforgreatapes.org.

Rooterville Animal Sanctuary Raven the rooster thinks he’s a turkey.

Gracie and Daphne the pink pigs love to splash in their personal blue pool. Tinsel the NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

ginormous cow respectfully requests you not peel his bananas for him. Leonidas the baby pig was auctioned off for someone’s pork dinner, but the compassionate high bidder had other ideas, and Rooterville in Melrose welcomed him home. Now he’s a charming greeter at the sanctuary. Other residents include both pot bellied and farm pigs, chickens, turkeys, goats, and a few mascot dogs and cats.

Don’t kill the messenger here, but it’s said that pigs are smarter than dogs, behind chimpanzees, dolphins, and elephants. The jury’s out on goats. Turkeys?

Just no. Still, says founder Elaine West, all the creatures feel the love at Rooterville, and give it right back. Some pigs and chickens roam free, and even show up at the on-site campground to commune with the humans.

Rooterville just moved onto its expanded 20-acre campus in time for its December Hoggy Holidays, when the sanctuary is decorated for festive animal photo ops. Craving the full sanctuary experience?

Check out the RV and camper rates. Virtual adoptions include a certificate, photograph, and a meet-your-animal tour.

Self-guided weekend tours are by appointment, March-December. Bring healthy fresh fruits and veggies to hand-feed the residents, and plan to rub some piggy bellies. Donation: $10 per person. Visit www.rooterville.org.

The Bird Gardens of Naples Deep in the woods at the edge of Corkscrew Swamp is a sanctuary where 200-plus flamboyant-hued parrots live, squawk, and fly through enclosed habitats. Most have plenty to say, and some even lure visitors with come-ons like “Whoop de do! You wanna rock & roll?” Social groups share flight aviaries, while some pairs and a few loners with attitude have their own habitats.

All were abused, neglected, or relinquished by their owners, says founder Keriellen Lohrman, and all are now safe, well fed, and under veterinary care.

Guided visits are by appointment (absolutely no walk-ins), to walk the paths with a guide – often Keriellen herself, who knows every single parrot by name and call. About 30 wild peacocks roam free in the sanctuary and nest in the trees. After the two-hour tour, some sweet-natured ambassador parrots are on hand with their NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021

adopted owners for photo ops. Tour fee: none. Donations gratefully accepted.

Pet parrots that were relinquished due to a change in family circumstances often are grieving and need to be re-homed quickly. But be warned: Adoption is almost as complex as human adoption, with paperwork, vet references, sanctuary meetand-greets, home visits, and fostering. The online application reminds you that parrots can live to 100, possibly outliving you and your children. If you’re still onboard and can meet the requirements, here’s great news: The sanctuary has accepted 100 beautiful macaws from an out-of-state sanctuary that’s closing, and all are adoptable. Visit www.thebirdgardensofnaples.org.

Shy Wolf Sanctuary Education and Experience Center Picture a wolf standing in an alpine forest on an icy winter night, howling at the full moon. While we don’t have many icy alpine mountains in Naples (and it’s a myth that wolves howl at the moon), visitors here often are blessed with the mesmerizing symphony of wolfsong in broad daylight. Take Wolfdog Jasper. He may vocalize to IM members of his pack or profess undying love to his lady friend, or simply express his joy of living. Jasper was lucky: Loving humans relinquished him to the sanctuary when he outgrew their home.

Most of the animals arrive suffering from horrific abuse or abandonment. “We rescue animals that no one else would save,” says founder Nancy Smith. As it turns out, she adds, “they teach us about compassion, gratitude, kindness, forgiveness, and unconditional love.”

Besides wolves and wolfdogs, the sanctuary cares for foxes, prairie dogs, sugar gliders, a raccoon, and even a bobcat. After time for healing and decompression, some animals become adoptable. The process starts with a form online.

Shy Wolf Sanctuary will soon relocate to a spacious 17-acre campus. With requests from around the world, visits are booked up to a year ahead, so sign up now for next summer! The sanctuary also has an exceptional school outreach program and a Healing Hearts program serving at-risk youth. Visit www.shywolfsanctuary.org.

Alyssa’s Animal Sanctuary And finally, a sanctuary where a real

Photos, facing page: Daphne from the Rooterville Animal Sanctuary in Melrose.

Above: Marko shows off Romeo, a resident of The Bird Garden of Naples.

Photos by Karen T. Bartlett

life Wilbur the Pig, his bestie Charlotte, and more than three little pigs, plus chickens, goats, cows, horses, and wannabe unicorns sleep in rainbow-hued wooden cottages under soft blankies.

When she suffered a near-fatal heart attack four years ago, Alyssa Barry quit her day job and created a nonprofit sanctuary to rescue farm animals living a nightmare.

Today the lifelong animal lover cares for 150 animals that seem ridiculously happy.

Alyssa believes that if she gives city-raised kids super-fun encounters with farm animals, they may grow up to create a world where fewer animals need to be rescued.

To make sure the memories stick, she created unicorn dress-up teas, goat playgrounds, themed birthday parties at “chicknic” tables, and more. Check the website for weekday schedules, private weekend party reservations, and holiday events. Want a unique gift? At the online store you can order a personalized video message by your child’s favorite animal.

Visit www.alyssasanimalsanctuary.com. neafamily.com

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NEAPOLITANfamily • November 2021