OCTOBER 2022 | NJFAMILY.COM SPOOKYSCARYGHOSTATTRACTIONSTOURSROADTRIPS NJ’S BEST SCHOOLSPRIVATE FORCARINGYOUR PARENTSAGING raisingteens sectionspecial WHAT TO KNOW ABOUT SELF HARM TIPS TO MANAGE SATSTRESS&ACT PREP HELP THEM FIND A JOB
Simple and Stress-Free The ideal kids birthday party venue for any age. While we take care of the details, you can enjoy the party. Attractions for All Ages Parents Party Too We do all the planning and heavy lifting. You get all the credit. VOTED FAVORITE KIDS PARTY VENUE! Take your birthday party to new heights at Urban Air Adventure Park! Let ’em spin, bounce, score, chase, race, climb - we’ve got you covered to let ‘em have an awesome time! To make things even easier, we provide a party host, balloons, plates, napkins, and forks to make for a stellar party! $25 OFF BOOK TODAY FOR COUPON CODE NJFAM1022 COUPON NJFAM1022 APPLIES TOWARDS ANY BIRTHDAY PARTY PACKAGE BOOKED BY 10/31/22 VALID FOR SOUTH HACKENSACK, MILLTOWN, AND AVENEL LOCATIONS ONLY COUPON MUST BE MENTIONED AT THE TIME OF BOOKING MAY NOT BE COMBINED WITH ANY OTHER OFFER, PROMOTION, DISCOUNT, OR MEMBERSHIP BENEFIT NOT VALID ON PREVIOUSLY BOOKED PARTIES Climbing Walls // Warrior Course // Virtual Reality // Battle Beam ProZone // Tubes Playground // Trampolines & More! South Hackensac CALL TO BOOK YOUR PARTY TODAY! 69 Wesley Street S Hackensack, NJ 07606 UrbanAir.com • 201-968-5065 • info@UrbanAirSH.c 396 Ryders Lane Milltown, NJ 08850 Milltown (Woodbridge) 1600 Saint Georges Ave Avenel, NJ 07001 Avenel
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 3 Healthy + Happy Raising Smarties SpecialFeatureSection Me SpecialTimeSection IS IT ADHD? Tips to get kids the help they need to thrive and succeed PRIVATE SCHOOLS FOR SPECIAL NEEDS KIDS An NJ mom shares how to advocate for the best placement CARING FOR AGING PARENTS The best senior living communities in NJ BREAST HEALTH The latest guidelines to keep you feeling your best PRIVATE PREVIEWSSCHOOL Explore schools in and around NJ 9 13 29 Explore On CoverThe IT’S SHOWTIME! Performances your family will love when the curtain goes up FALL PLANNER From corn mazes to pumpkin patches, there’s fun for all 62 64 57 47 35 41 38 44 STRESS LESS Help kids cope with whatever life throws them ON THE JOB How to help your teen find the right first job SELF HARM What to do if your teen is cutting SAT, ACT OR NO? What to know about changes in testing Feature HALLOWEENSPOOKY The best spots for scary not-so-scary)(and fun this month 17 Contents Stuff We Love 7 BOOT UP The coolest kicks for your kids IS IT TIME FOR ASSISTED LIVING? How to know when to make a change for your parents 25 ©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM / CATLANE Raising Teens
—P.C., WHIPPANY
Staci is a talented attorney, who is dedicated to children and their families and determined to get appropriate support services for kids so they can reach their highest potential. She’s comfortable to work with and supports you throughout the entire process. We’re so thankful for everything she’s done to help our son throughout his educational journey.
From estate planning to family law to real estate, let us know who’s made a difference in your life. Here’s what other NJ parents have said about their lawyers: Know a Great Attorney? njfamily.com/lawyersGO TO njfamily.com/lawyers TO NOMINATE AN EXCEPTIONAL LAWYER. WE’LL SPREAD THE WORD IN OUR BEST LAWYERS FOR FAMILIES ISSUE IN APRIL. (Deadline: Nov. 30)
Personal Injury • Roseland
Richard S. Diamond, Esq.
Jenny Berse, Esq.
Special Education • Warren
Family Law • Westfield
—B.M., FREDON
Staci J. Greenwald, Esq.
It is my pleasure to recommend Jenny Berse. Her performance as my attorney has been nothing short of exceptional thus far. A family case is one that can be truly personal and cumbersome when sharing your story. However, Mrs. Berse was always very affable and positive during such times. I would most certainly rank Berse Law as one of the best family law firms in New Jersey.—A.C., CRANFORD
Special Education • Cranbury, Red Bank
My family was in a horrific car accident with many medical needs. Throughout the whole process (years) Jeremy was personable yet professional at the same time. He truly made our lives much less stressful.
Family Law • Millburn
Ms. Warshaw is a great lawyer. I am so thankful that she was there for me in my tough time. For any special needs parents needing help with schools, Ms. Warshaw is the best attorney that you can ever imagine to have.—S.K., ISELIN
Personal responses, allows time to understand what he is saying, nonjudgmental and makes you feel less anxious. Works your situation for you, doesn’t lump you into legal matters that don’t concern your situation. Highly recommended.
Julie Warshaw, Esq.
—C.P., BERKELEY HEIGHTS
Jeremy L. Hylton, Esq.
From apple picking and sweatshirt weather to fall foliage and Halloween attractions, there’s so much to love about autumn in New Jersey. Whether you’ve got preschoolers, teens or kids in between, there are tons of fun spots to get your Halloween on this month, especially with so many new experiences popping up in our area.
Whatever stage of parenting you’re in, make sure to pause and take care of yourself , too. Happy fall!
HEIDI L. BORST ARRICCA ELIN SANSONE KATHRYN QUIGLEY LAURA WATERS PRODUCTION DESIGNER ROSA M. JOSEPH PRODUCTION/BUSINESS MANAGER ERICA BARTON PROJECT & CIRCULATION MANAGER DIANE ERDENBERGER DIRECTOR OF ADVERTISING MARCY HOLETON ADVERTISING REPRESENTATIVES ANN OCTOBERPAMELADEBBIECATHYCUSACKGROTELUBRANSKIBARBARANASTROPETERSONERINSALMANANDREATHORNE2022|NJFAMILY.COMVOLUME32,ISSUE5
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 5 Editor’s Letter /@@NEWJERSEYFAMILYNJFAMILYMAGNEWJERSEYFAMILY
ourTurntopage17formegaguidetoallthingsHalloweeninandaroundNJ.
We Fall in NJ
It’sSp0okySeason!
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This fall, we’re excited about Haunt O’ Ween in Holmdel. The 200,000-square-foot outdoor playground at Bell Works has character performers, epic pumpkins, games, rides and photo ops. For more on this and other attractions throughout the state, head to page 17. We’ve sorted our mega list by scare factor so you can choose spots for all ages or something more terrifying, like Brighton Asylum in Passaic or Field of Terror in East Windsor.
This time of year also brings a return to busy schedules. If you have teens at home, that means heavy homework loads and lots of after-school commitments. In our special section on parenting teens, we share advice to help them manage stress. Step one: Show them healthy ways you cope yourself. Highly-stressed teens may get anxious or even depressed trying to deal with overwhelming emotions. Without other coping skills, some teens experiment with selfharm. In this issue, we look at how a parent can help change their teen’s mindset.
If you’re parenting a teenager, you may also be busy caring for an elderly parent. Be sure to read one NJ mom’s experience with making the decision to move her father to assisted living. On page 29, we also highlight some of the state’s best senior living communities.
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 20226 www.GalleryofLittleSmiles.com • (973) 295-6700 220 Ridgedale Avenue, Suite B1 • Florham Park, NJ 07932 Specialized Dental Care For Children and Adolescents Dennis W. Lam, DDS, MS, FRCD(C) Diplomate, American Board of Pediatric Dentistry Jeannette G. Glass, DMD, MS Cosmetic Dentistry Gallery of l ittle SmileS “I am thankful for Dr. Lam and his excellent care.” ~ H.K., Florham Park 973-994-4884 office 973-809-8114 LMascera@weichert.comcell Call Me For Your Perfect Family Home Today!LynnMascera Sales Associate 35 North Livingston Ave., Livingston, NJ 07039
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY Stuff We Love
1. ALL TERRAIN This super cool Chelsea boot has grippy traction for all-weather fun and a water-resistant upper to keep their dogs dry all day. Kensington Treklite Glitter Child, Native Shoes. $65, nativeshoes.com 2. FANCY FEET She’ll have serious style in these boots with a suede exterior and wrap-around bootlace detail. Michon Short, Koolaburra by Ugg. $69.95, koolaburra.com 3. TAKE A HIKE This comfortable hiking boot will let your kid explore without limits. They’re light but durable with an anti-stink lining, too. Big Kids’ Moab 3 Mid Waterproof Boot, Merrell. $70, merrell.com 4. SNOW DAY This slip-on snow boot with a waterproof upper will keep their feet dry during sledding races and snowball fights. Big Kids’ Powderbug Plus II Print Snow Boot, Columbia. $65, columbia.com 5. CROC OUT Oversized openings at the top make these sporty rain boots easy for kids to pull on and off. Reflective logos on the back make kids easy to spot when it’s getting dark. Kids’ Crocband Rain Boot, Crocs. $34.99, crocs.com
Boot CAMPKeeptheirtootsieswarmandtoastyinthesestylishkicks. 1 3 4 5 2
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 20228 www.BrightSmiles4Kids.com 121 Shelley Drive Hackettstown, NJ (908) 979-0606 Pediatric Dentists: Michael Lateiner, DMD Peter Paradiso, DMD and BlairKevinOrthodontist:AssociatesLehnes,DMDSittmann,DMD Treating infants, children, adolescents & special needs patients Unmatched Expertise.Unrivaled Technology.Unprecedented Service. GET LESSTOEVERBESTYOURSMILEINUP35%TIME Diamond Plus Invisalign Provider | NJ Top Doc 2009-2021 New Jersey Family’s Favorite Kids’ Docs™ 2009-2021 | Best of Essex/Morris Magazine Every smile is backed by our 100% CAGGIANO SMILE WARRANTY Dr. David 272973.887.8780CaggianoParsippanyRoad,ParsippanyMostInsurancePlansAccepted Author of “A PARENT’S GUIDE TO UNDERSTANDING ORTHODONTICS”MorrisCountyBraces.com Westfield Pediatric Dental Group 555 Westfield Avenue, Westfield, NJ 07090 • kidsandsmiles.com • 908-232-1231 TIPS TO KEEPHEALTHY:TEETH • Brush twice a day • Floss once a day • Use a fluoride rinse daily at nighttime • Eat healthy snacks with low-to-no sugar in the ingredients TIMOTHY P. McCABE, D.M.D., Board Certified JULIE JONG, D.M.D., Board Certified KELLY WALK, D.D.S., Board Certified JOHN CHANG, D.D.S., Board Certified
Signs to look for and how a diagnosis can actually help
PEOPLEIMAGES/©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM
ADHD typically presents with hyperactivity, impulsivity and poor attention span, says S. Michael Vergara, MD, a neurodevelopmental pediatrician with Developmental Pediatric Associates at Hunterdon Health in Flemington. “These symptoms are concerning when it starts to impact one’s academic potential
and social-emotional well-being.” Other hallmarks of ADHD are an inability to focus on tasks, being disorganized and constantly losing and forgetting things. Children with hyperactivity often seem to be “driven by a motor” and cannot sit still.
f your child is struggling, distracted in school, unable to sit still and focus, you may have considered the possibility that they have ADHD. Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder often presents in childhood and is characterized by limited attention and hyperactivity. If left untreated, problems such as difficulty with schoolwork and low self-esteem can result. If you suspect ADHD, here’s the info you need to know to get on the road toward helping your child succeed and thrive.
There is no one diagnostic test that can diagnose ADHD, says Vergara. “The diagnosis is made from obtaining a comprehensive medical history, gathering information from parents and teachers and individuals who see the child in different settings.” Assessment scales such as the Vanderbilt Assessment Scales or the Conners rating scale are also helpful. This information will be used to determine if the diagnostic criteria set by the DSM-V are met by guidelines set by the American Academy of Pediatrics.
By Ronnie Koenig
ADHD AND YOUR CHILD
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 9 Healthy & Happy
WHAT ARE THE WARNING SIGNS?
HOW IS ADHD DIAGNOSED?
BENEFITS OF WORKING WITH A COACH
EXECUTIVE FUNCTION AND ADHD
Girls may not receive a diagnosis and therefore may miss out on getting much-needed assistance. Even worse, girls are more likely to internalize their differences as something that’s their fault. If your daughter is daydreaming and fidgeting in a way that interferes with schoolwork and social relationships it could be smart to get her evaluated so she can get the help she needs to succeed.
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202210 Healthy + Happy DIEGO_CERVO/©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM
HOW CAN PARENTS WORK WITH TEACHERS?
Your child’s teacher spends the most time with them and can be a valuable source of information in determining how they are performing in school and what can be done to ensure the best outcome. Vergara suggests parents approach the teacher with their concerns. “This may reveal that the teacher has the same concerns and that an evaluation with a specialist may be warranted to determine if a medical diagnosis, such as ADHD, is present,” he says. Once your child has a diagnosis, plans that may include special accommodations at school can be implemented to ensure they are getting the help they need to succeed.
WHAT ABOUT MEDICATION?
Some of the most helpful strategies Ash has used include breaking down tasks into manageable units (sometimes called “chunking”). “So, rather than sitting down and trying to write a five-paragraph essay, the student would work on breaking that task down into much smaller pieces,” she says.
PROVEN STRATEGIES FOR ADHD
If your child is struggling with things such as task initiation and time management, a school psychologist can help. “Many kids with ADHD struggle with executive functioning,” says Amy Ash a school psychologist at Middlesex Borough Public Schools and board-certified behavior analyst with Functional Behavior Solutions, which has offices in Montclair and Westfield. “Executive functioning skills are higher-level cognitive skills such as planning, organization and self-regulation, which are housed in the prefrontal cortex of our brains. Part of this is due to the fact that ADHD is neurologically based, as are our executive functioning capabilities.”
Boys and girls are both affected by ADHD but the symptoms can look very different in the latter, making it more difficult to diagnose. While boys often have a hyperactive component to ADHD, girls frequently have ADHD-I (inattentive type). This means that while they’re not “bouncing off the walls” like their male counterparts, they do have a difficult time staying organized, following directions and paying attention.
“I personally am conservative when it comes to starting medications for ADHD,” says Vergara. “I first discuss the options of what can be done to help the child, especially if young, such as working with a behavioral specialist who can help teach the child and parents strategies and skills for ADHD. Next, I recommend working with the school, possibly obtaining an accommodation
Often, talk therapy is the first treatment considered for ADHD, but in some cases, medication can be the right option for kids. The drugs prescribed to children for ADHD are non-habit forming and, in many cases, very effective. Stimulants such as Adderall can help reduce interrupting, fidgeting and other hyperactive symptoms, as well as improve task completion and home relationships.
plan and related services to address the ADHD diagnosis to help the child be successful at school. If these are not as effective, medications are usually discussed as the next option.”
An executive function coach can provide parents and children with ADHD with strategies to help a child stay organized, focused, productive and better able to complete academic and nonacademic tasks. “Learning a variety of strategies to address these weaknesses not only provides the child with invaluable skills, but also can make difficult activities, like chores and completing homework, easier for families to manage,” says Ash.
ADHD in Girls
Another helpful strategy is to include a visual schedule with picture icons for non-readers or a written-out schedule or checklist for children who can read. “A parent can create these on their own or can find already prepared visuals online.”
betterIntroducingcartwheels and faster jump-rope times for Monmouth County.
Children’s Specialized Hospital is now open in our community.
!$"
Now that our outpatient center is open, kids can get the care they need to reach their full potential right here in Monmouth County. From physical, occupational and speech therapy to developmental and behavioral services, this state-of-the-art facility o ers a wide variety of specialized pediatric care you won’t find anywhere else in the area. Which means less time traveling for care, and more time to be a kid. Learn more at rwjbh.org/cshmonmouth
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202212 rockaway orthodontics “where great smiles begin” It is our mission to provide the highest quality orthodontic treatment in a warm, nurturing environment. We strive to create beautiful smiles through individualized treatment, in which our patient’s comfort is our highest priority. • Consultations are Always Complimentary • Most Insurances Accepted • No Down Payment and Interest Free Financing It is orthodontics with a mom’s touch! Melissa Roberto, DMD Orthodontics for Children & Adults 141 US Hwy 46 West #101 Rockaway, rockawayortho.com973-298-5900NJ 547 East Broad Street, Westfield (Across from Library) 401 North Wood Avenue, Linden (Across from Post Office) 118 North Avenue West, Cranford (Across from Rustic Mill Diner) Stanley Gersch, dmd, pa Scott D. Gersch, dmd Ilona Rossignol, dmd Voted NJ Top Orthodontist by NJ Monthly & New Jersey Family’s Favorite Kids’ Docs™ Invisalign ELITE Top 1% Provider for Teens and Adults! Complimentary Evaluation Diplomate, American Board of Orthodontics Director of Invisalign, NYU College of Dentistry www.GerschOrtho.com • 908-233-8668 EveningSaturday&Hours Pediatric Dentists: Mike Lateiner, DMD,MS Peter Paradiso, DMD, MBS Orthodontist: Denise Kitay DDS, MMSc kidzworlddental.com Live. Laugh. Smile. State-of-the-art orthodontics in a caring and comfortable environment Barbara A. Fodero, DDS, MS SPECIALIST IN ORTHODONTICS FOR CHILDREN AND ADULTS 33 Main Street, Suite 104, Chatham • Permit #5268 973.701.2200 • chathambraces.com Voted Top Dentist by NJ Monthly and New Jersey Family’s Favorite Kids’ Docs™ for &adolescentschildren,infants,specialneedspatients973.300.0002 • drmikedmd.com 11 Lawrence Road, Newton the world always looks brighter from behind a smile! Newton-Sparta Pediatric Dentistry & Orthodontics Pediatric: Mike Lateiner, DMD & Associates Orthodontics Kevin Lehnes, DMD Howard B. Bobrow, DMD, PA NJ Specialty #3831 8 Shunpike Rd., Madison • 973-377-0900 35 West Main St. #207, Denville • bobroworthodontics.com973-627-5902 Creating Beautiful Smiles Since 1983 NJ Monthly Top Orthodontist ■ Specializing in orthodontics for adults and children ■ Consultations are always complimentary ■ Flexible financing options available ■ Most insurances are accommodated
We already knew: Jonah needed to attend a different school, one that focused on speech disorders while addressing his global developmental delays. We even had a school in mind,
Funding Private School for Your Child with Special Needs
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 13 Raising Smarties
one licensed by the State of New Jersey as an approved private school for students with disabilities. But how could we get our local school district to agree to send him there, especially given much higher tuition and transportation costs?
Start with this: All successful outcomes circle back to your child’s Individualized Education Plan, or IEP, and changes in placement require your relentless advocacy. So let’s get started!
STOCKPLANETS/©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM
wenty years ago my husband and I were faced with a challenge: Jonah, our then-three-year-old who has fragile X syndrome, was attending a county-run preschool for children with disabilities but he wasn’t getting the services he needed, especially intensely-targeted daily speech therapy for his severe apraxia. What to do?
NJ mom Laura Waters shares a step-by-step guide to getting your child’s private school placement funded by your public school district.
IT’S ALL ABOUT THE IEP
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202214 Raising Smarties WATERSLAURAOFCOURTESYPHOTO
Sure, that’s scary. But sometimes you have to play hardball and as a parent of a special needs student you’ve cultivated your inner lion. Don’t be afraid to roar!
First, remember the first rule of special education advocacy: the determination of your child’s placement is decided after your IEP is complete, which includes narratives of your child’s present levels of academic achievement and performance, goals
“Until this process is finished, no one should be talking about where the IEP will be implemented and what is the most ‘appropriate’ placement. Everything is on the table and cost can’t be a factor.”
What does this mean? For FAPE, “free” means the district pays all costs. But what is “appropriate”? And how do you balance the upside of inclusion (“least restrictive environment”) with a child who can only make “appropriate” progress in a more restrictive environment, like a non-district
Someplacement.parentscan pay for a lawyer and additional expert evaluations. Some parents even do what Drew’s parents did: disenroll your child from the public school, pay the tuition at a private school and then sue the district for all expenses.
Under newer circumstances, you have to build your case: ask for more frequent IEP meetings (you can call them at any time) to review your child’s academic and social progress, take advantage of the district-paid independent evaluations available to you through state law and document everything: emails, notes, phone calls, report cards, tests. You are creating a file of your child’s lack of progress to demonstrate the district is in violation of FAPE.
While a lower-level court sided with the district, saying IDEA only required Drew to make “minimal” progress, the Supreme Court said a child’s “educational program must be appropriately ambitious in light of his circumstances” and that “every child should have the chance to meet challenging objectives.”
RAISING THE BAR FOR SPECIAL NEEDS FAMILIES
—Laura Waters is founder and managing editor of New Jersey Education Report. She and her husband have four children and have lived in Central Jersey for 30 years.
Until this process is finished, no one should be talking about where the IEP will be implemented and what is the most “appropriate” placement. Everything is on the table and cost can’t be a factor.
JONAH CELEBRATES HIS ROCKGRADUATIONSIXTH-GRADEFROMBROOKSCHOOLINSKILLMAN.
Whoa! This was a game-changer for special needs families, dramatically raising the bar for school district obligations towards children with disabilities. What does this mean in your fight to get your child into a private placement?
for the coming year, how many minutes a week your child will spend with specialists, etc.
For others, this outlay of cash is not an option. It wasn’t for us but this was two decades ago, before many districts had preschool and K-12 programs for students with significant disabilities, so our district had no choice.
If you’re the parent of one of the 240,000 New Jersey children classified as eligible for special education services, you’ve worked with your Child Study Team to create an IEP, a document based on a federal law called the Individuals with needsmustall(IDEA)EducationDisabilitiesActwhichsaysschooldistrictsprovidespecialchildrenwith a Free, Appropriate Public Education (FAPE) in the Least Restrictive Environment (LRE).
Contact the Statewide Parent Advocacy Network for help. Talk to other parents and learn from their experiences. Go to school board meetings and speak during public comment about the district’s failure to adhere to established law.
school? Sixyears ago parents like you got an additional tool from a 2016 U.S. Supreme Court decision, Endrew F. v. Douglas County School District, that said “appropriate” doesn’t mean “minimal.” A fourth grader named Drew, who has autism, was attending his public school in Colorado but his parents believed he wasn’t making adequate progress. At their own expense, they moved him to a private special education school and sued the district to recover their money.
This is a hard sell so you must convince the Child Study Team that your child will make more progress in a different school. This may mean going to “due process,” or using the legal process to appeal the district’s reluctance to pay for an out-ofdistrict
Now we get to LRE: IDEA says that a child must be educated in the “least restrictive environment,” which moves up a ladder from the most inclusive (a general education class) to least inclusive (residential setting or homeschooling). If your goal is a private school, you’re asking the district to approve a more restrictive environment and the only way to justify this is to prove that your child is not making adequate academic and social progress. In other words, you have to make the case that your child is not receiving FAPE.
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 15 PEDIATRIC ASSOCIATES of Westfield New Jersey Family’s Favorite Kids’ Docs™ 2009-2021 Robert A. Panza, md, faap Jane C. Presti, md Nicole A. Panza, md, faap Madeline M. DiMurro, do, faap 570 Westfield Avenue, Westfield 908.276.6598 566 Westfield Avenue, Westfield 908.233.7171 pediatricsofwestfield.com • Practice Open to Infants, Children, Adolescents • Board-Certified Pediatricians • Most Insurances Accepted • Weekend Hours Available • Well and Sick Waiting Rooms Helping your child make meaningful gains while having fun! We offer Speech, Feeding, OT and Developmental Services/ABA. Our pediatric practice specializes in: 1211 Hamburg Turnpike, Ste. 224, Wayne, NJ 39 Newton-Sparta Rd., Ste. B, Andover NJ (973) 800-8515 • bravewingstherapy.com Give us a call to get started today! PROMPT • Sensory integration Motor-based Therapy • SOS Approach to Feeding Talk Tools/Oral Placement Therapy TOTs/Myofunctional Therapy • Voice Therapy We are dedicated to helping your child achieve their goals!
LIVE THEATRE for Families in Morristown share the wonder! Tickets at mayoarts.org Box Office (973) 539-8008 100 South St, Morristown 11/6 10/16 11/11-12 10/29 10/8 Masters of Illusion 10/16 Peppa Pig’s Adventure 10/29 Disney Junior Live on Tour: Costume Palooza 11/6 Baby Shark Live! The Christmas Show 11/11-12 The Illusionists – Magic of the Holidays 11/27 Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer: The Musical 12/11 Deck the Halls with Disney featuring DCappella 12/16-27 New Jersey Ballet’s Nutcracker with New Jersey Symphony 1/7 STOMP 2/5 Pinkalicious 2/11 Cirque Zuma Zuma 3/5 The Cat in the Hat 3/16 Dublin Irish Dance presents “Wings” 3/18 Disney’s Winnie the Pooh: The New Musical Stage Adaptation 3/26 NJ Ballet presents Once Upon a Time... 4/2 Dragons and Mythical Beasts 5/21 NJ Ballet presents Princess Aurora’s Wedding (from The Sleeping Beauty) *Check with the Box Office for age appropriateness of events more family-friendly shows MPAC is grateful to the following donors whose major support helps to sustain the general operating needs of our organization:
We've rounded up the best spooky fun in and around New Jersey for every age in your brood!
Feature
By JENNIFER AMATO
MAX-KEGFIRE/©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM
Explore 200,000 square feet of performances, games, rides, photo ops and more immersive Halloween fun. Kids can trick-or-treat inside, dance at the Beyond the Grave Rave, have their faces painted or jump around in the bounce houses. Come in costume and take photos amidst thousands of pumpkins. There’s $1 million worth of candy to be given out, too. Fridays through Sundays, Sept. 30–Oct. 30, plus Oct. 26, Oct. 27 and Oct. 31.
AddamsFest addamsfest.comWestfield
NOT SCARY
Wagner Farm Arboretum, Warren, wfafnj.org
The Great Pumpkin Fest Dorney Park, Allentown, PA dorneypark.com
Boo at the Boardwalk Jenkinson's Boardwalk, Pt. jenkinsons.comPleasant
on select dates and see their favorite Sesame Street characters dressed up for the occasion. There are shows, trick-or-treating around the park, an interactive Scarecrow Scavenger Hunt and Halloweenthemed floats during the parade. Sept. 17–Nov. 6.
Sesame Place, Langhorne, PA sesameplace.com
this year for guests 13 and older is Dinosaurs in Darkness: The Hatching, a scary Halloween walk-thru experience that brings visitors up close with prehistoric creatures. Takes place Friday and Saturday nights from Oct. 7-29.
Healthy + Happy
Boo at the Zoo Bronx Zoo, The Bronx, NY bronxzoo.com
Halloween House
This year’s events will feature an elaborate display of handcarved and LED-lit pumpkins. On Thursday nights the event will be a drive-thru, but on Fridays and Saturdays you can walk thru. Weekends from Oct. 13–29.
Westfield was home to Charles Addams, creator of The Addams Family, and that’s a big reason to celebrate. Through October, the town gets its Halloween on with everything from an art exhibit and wicked window decorations to a lantern sail and masquerade ball. You can even see the house that inspired the show, but only from the outside since it’s private property.
This new indoor mall experience
Scare Factor:
Great for the youngest in your crew, these fright-free events offer lots of fun without the scares.
Haunt O' Ween Bell Works, hauntoween.comHolmdel
Edison, Lawrence Twp., Toms River, Rockaway, halloweenhouseus.comParamus
Kids can come in costume
Brite Nites
CAMELBACK RESORT /PARKDORNEYTOP:FROM RESORTCAMELBACK NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202218
How fun does underwater pumpkin carving sound? At this two-weekend event (Oct. 22, 23, 29 and 30, weather permitting) your kids will love the crafts, face painting, entertainmenttrick-or-treating,andkiddierides.
The Count’s SpooktacularHalloween
Come dressed in your Halloween best and walk along a candy trail, see a costume parade, crafts, a live bird meet-and-greet, magic and mind reading, pumpkin carving demos, a Wildlife Theater, Boo Playground, Extinct Animal Graveyard, pumpkin trail and Trick-or-Truth Trail. Come on Saturdays or Sundays from Oct. 1–30, plus Columbus Day. New
Dorney Park gets spooky after dark, but during the day it’s filled with family-friendly Halloween fun with Peanuts characters dressed in costumes. Snoopy and pals will be on hand for meet-and-greets, plus live music, activities, costume contests, dance parties and more, plus lots of cute kiddie rides on weekends from Sept. 17–Oct. 30.
VALLEYHUDSONHISTORICFORNYCZTOM OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 19
The Great Jack O’ Lantern Blaze Van Cortlandt hudsonvalley.org/events/blazeCroton-on-HudsonManor
THE GREAT JACK O'LANTERN BLAZE
This outdoor goblin-friendly Halloween town has tricks, treats and surprises for the kids with a rolling railway train ride. Afterwards, climb on the hay maze, pick a pumpkin from the patch, play on the racing slide and meet the local witch. Saturdays and Sundays Sept. 24–Oct. 23.
Six Flags is downright terrifying at night during Fright Fest, but also has its fair share of fun family thrills during the day, too. The kids can walk the sweet Pumpkin Patch Lane, grab candy on the trick-ortreat trail and show off their moves at a Spooktacular Dance Party. If
didonatofuncenter.comHammonton
Visit this theme park for a Brick-or-Treat extravaganza, which includes the Monster Party. There will be Halloween shows, dance parties, parades, costume contests and trick-ortreating. Saturdays and Sundays Sept. 24– Oct. 30.
Healthy + Happy
Trick-or-Treat Train DiDonato’s Family Fun Center
LEGOLAND Brick-or-Treat LEGOLAND New York, legoland.com/new-yorkGoshen
Come for good scares and frightful fun that won’t keep the kids up all night.
SLIGHTLYSPOOKY
Boo Fest Six Flags Great Adventure, sixflags.com/greatadventureJackson
they are feeling a bit brave, they can listen to some stories from a local witch. Select nights in September and October.
DORNEY PARK
Take a 45-minute walk around the stadium to see more than 6,000 hand-carved jack o’ lanterns. Then roast some s’mores with hot cider or cocoa at the fall festival. There’s also a Ferris wheel, carousel, live music and a craft beer selection planned for Sept. 23–Nov. 6.
This event features more than 7,000 hand-carved jacko'-lanterns that light up the night. New for 2022, watch the animated “Jack” Smith Shop in action and keep an eye out for glowing bees, complete with synchronized lighting and an original soundtrack. While in the Hudson Valley, stop at Washington Irving’s Home and learn about the legend of Sleepy Hollow. The fun extends through Nov. 20!
Scare Factor:
promises lots of fun without the fright. Immerse yourself in scenes from the screen, like “The Nightmare Before Christmas” or “Stranger Things,” minus all the gore and scares. Weekends, Oct. 1–Nov. 1.
Skyland Stadium Jack O’ Lantern Experience Skylands Stadium, skylandsstadium.comAugusta
Zombie Walk Boardwalk, Asbury asburyparkzombiewalk.comPark
The parade on Oct. 21 will feature live music, entertainers, floats and righttheDanceAwardsparticipants.costumedTheHalloweenCeremonyandFamilyPartywilltakeplaceatExcursionParkBandShellaftertheparade.
Halloween Parade & Dance Party Sea Isle parade-dance-party-0visitsicnj.com/events/halloween-City
Try riding any of the nine roller coasters in the dark if you dare. Through Oct. 31.
Fright Fest
Ghost walks, graveyard tours, Ghosts of the Lighthouse Trolley Tour, historic haunts and a Magic & Mystery House Tour abound in Cape May, plus trickor-treating and a Halloween Craft & Collectibles Show. There will also be a Halloween village exhibit on display. The festivities run from Sept. 9–Oct. 31.
market. Stay to warm up by the fire pits and treat the kids to make-your-own s’mores and hot cocoa. Through Oct. 31.
Halloween Light Show Demarest Farms 244 Wierimus Rd., halloweenlightshows.comHillsdale
Six Flags Great Adventure, sixflags.comJackson
Brighton Asylum 2 Brighton Ave., brightonasylum.comPassaic
Hop in the car for a familyfriendly drive-thru light show. You’ll see 32 acres of light displays before trying some farm fresh goodies at the
Night of Terror
Creamy Acres Farm Mullica nightofterror.comHill
Halloween in Cape May Cape capemaymac.orgMay
FRIGHT FEST / SIX FLAGS GREAT ADVENTURELEGOLAND BRICK-OR-TREAT ADVENTUREGREATFLAGSSIX/LEGOLANDLEFT:FROM
shows and scare zones are packed with roaming zombies, blood thirsty cowboys, crazed clowns and so much more!
Bloodshed Farms Drive-Thru 2919 Route 206, bloodshedfarmsfearfest.comColumbus
REALLYSCARY
On Oct. 8, Convention Hall and the Asbury Park Boardwalk will be overtaken by the undead who are rocking out to ’80s and ’90s punk and heavy metal music. Kids and adults can get dressed up and walk in the parade or watch along the route.
The Legend of Sleepy Hollow Historic Village of Allaire Wall Allairevillage.orgTwp.
Explore the village grounds and historic buildings from the 18th and 19th centuries— visit with ghosts, ghouls and monsters and listen to storytelling. Don’t miss a thrilling retelling of Washington Irving’s “The Legend of Sleepy Hollow” on Sept. 30 and Oct. 1.
The historic village gets a little spooky on Oct. 21 and 22. This family-friendly haunted walk-thru will give you chills and it's fun for all ages.
Happy Halloween Event Camelback camelbackresort.comTannersville,ResortPA
Only the brave should attempt these.
Calling all goblins, ghosts, witches and more—join the Howl O’Ween Doggie Parade and watch pups go through agility and rodeo courses and then visit pet-centric vendors. A treat trail, tote bag coloring, Boo Bar and a costume contest will be part of the day’s celebrations. The movie “Halloweentown” will be shown at dusk. Through Nov. 20.
During the day there are kidfriendly events, but after dark the zombies come out to play! The fear returns as terrifying haunted attractions, horrific
Brighton Asylum is a massive walk-thru dark attraction filled with live actors, horror moviestyle scares and Hollywoodquality special effects. Choose from the original Brighton Asylum, The Bleeding Grounds and Port9l and—if you dare— add on The Hack Shack, Fear Pressure or The Twitching Hour.
Prepare yourself for terrifying encounters with twisted creatures as you drive though scenes that channel spirits using special effects that may or may not give you nightmares. Sept. 30–Oct. 30.
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202220 Healthy + Happy
Ghoul Spring Village Historic Cold Spring Village Cape at-historic-cold-spring-villagehcsv.org/ghoul-spring-village-May
This massive 100-acre farm is
Scare Factor:
way through the MassAcre Maize. The final nightmare is the Carnevil of Chaos.
terror-filled attractions where visitors encounter zombies of all shapes and sizes. By day, there's a corn maze, pumpkin patch and haunted hayride. At night the farm transforms into The Karnival, the Killer Kornfield, the Haunted Hayride to Terror Town and Timmery Manor.
Walk through 200 acres of fright beginning with a haunted hayride to the Trail of Terror where you’ll find your
Halloween Haunt Dorney Park, Allentown, dorneypark.com/events/hauntPA
Scary Rotten Farms Berry Fresh Farms 151 Brick Blvd., scaryrottenfarms.comBrick
As you enter the gates of Gravity Hill, you’ll find over a dozen scenes spread out over 5 acres of walkable haunted trails and creepy themes and adventures. See which haunted house is the scariest! Weekends through Oct. 29.
Scare Farm 120 S. Branch Rd., Hillsborough scarefarm.com
Dorney Park will release hundreds of terrifying ghouls and ghosts into the park, ready to turn your nightmares into reality. Every corner is cursed with haunted scare mazes, scare zones and live entertainment. Hordes of hungry zombies and blood-thirsty vampires eagerly await you (as their next meal). Select nights Sept. 16–Oct. 29.
FridayBreakout.MarlboroMazeTheBarn,HauntedLivingandtheZombieOpeneveryandSaturdayfrom Sept. 24–Oct. 29, plus every Sunday in October, and Halloween night!
See three attractions for the price of one: try Creepy Hollow (a killer doesn’t like guests to leave the corn field), the Paranoia Walking Trails on sacred burial grounds, and The Slayride hayride of terrorizing scenes.
Field of Terror 831 Windsor-Perrineville Rd. East fieldofterror.comWindsor
Nightmare at Gravity Hill Cicconi Farms, 1005 Farmingdale Rd., nightmareatgravityhill.comJackson
There are four terrifying attractions hidden in the woods here: Haunted Hayride of Terror, 3D
inhabited by zombies, attack dogs, chainsaw-wielding maniacs and killer clowns. But the most unique attraction at Creamy Acres is the Haunted Paintball Hayride: visitors climb aboard a wagon and use mounted paintball guns to defend the crew. Sept. 30–Oct. 29.
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 21 Healthy + Happy
Farm of Horrors Schaefer Farms 1051 County Rd. 523, Flemington farmofhorrors.com
Muster up the courage for three haunted attractions. Dellas lives behind the mask he wore as a child, inflicting revenge on all during Delirium’s Requiem. Sinister Sneed’s Chaotic Carnival of Chaos is where helpless souls are gathered for the devil. Twisted Tales are not the fairytales you remember from childhood!
13 Hour Haunted House 105 W. Dewey Ave., 13thhourhauntedhatchets.comWharton
Take your pick of three haunted house attractions, complete with special effects and movie quality sets. Stay for one of six 60-minute escape rooms (and try to make your way out alive).
C. Casola Farms Haunted Attractions 131 S. Main St., hauntedcasola.comMarlboro
Head njfamily.com/falltoforcornmazes,pumpkinpicking,Halloweenhouses+more! DORNEY PARK PARKDORNEY
Experience four unique
This walk, hosted annually by the New Jersey Ghost Organization, will tell you all about East Brunswick’s local legends. Stroll the streets on Saturdays and Sundays Oct. 15–23 while real paranormal investigators share their secrets and experiences.
ROSEDALE CEMETERY WALKING TOUR
BORDENTOWN HAUNTED HISTORY TOUR
This tour through the historic Ivy League college town is more informative than scary. With the help of real ghost hunters, you’ll venture into the campus’s darkest corners with EMF meters, dowsing rods and more with hopes of interacting with the other side. Tours are every Friday and Saturday Oct. 14–29; advance tickets required.
$15, montclairhistory.org
Explore two miles of this 181-year-old Montclair cemetery on a guided tour on Oct. 30. Visit some of the site’s most notable inhabitants and learn about the unique grave imagery of their era. Advance tickets required.
Get the facts on notoriously mysterious town sites where many passerbys have experienced strange occurrences. Running Thursdays through Sundays in October, the family-friendly route was recently updated to include new twists, turns and tales.
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202222 Healthy + Happy
EAST BRUNSWICK GHOST WALK
and more from the ghosts (aka costumed actors) themselves.
PRINCETON GHOST TOUR ISRAELDIANE/TOURSWALKINGBORDENTOWN/MAGAZINEPRINCETON/STUDIOSP.M.LEFT:TOPFROMCLOCKWISE
$10, facebook.com/EBGhostWalk
Visit Haunts on a Ghost Tour SOMERVILLE
$35, princetontourcompany.com/tours
$15-20, bordentownwalkingtours.com
Real
HAUNTED SOMERVILLE $20-25, hauntedhistoryproductions.com
Trek historic cemeteries, haunted universities and more to learn about some of NJ’s most chilling legends. HAUNTED
ROSEDALE CEMETERY WALKING TOUR
BORDENTOWN HAUNTED HISTORY TOUR
PRINCETON GHOST TOUR
— Taryn Pire
entertainment. Hear tales of Prohibition-era whiskey bandits, the haunted Hotel Somerset
This all-ages excursion on Oct. 22 is jampacked with local lore, fun facts and spooky
Team up with cool-weather favorites from the sands of the Jersey Shore straight up to the Skylands. Enjoy pumpkin patches, apple picking and hayrides. Parks dressed in gold and crimson leaves. Discover iconic eateries and sporting events—from the grid iron to the greens. Plus, journeys like our Scenic Byway and Black Heritage itineraries. You’ll find hundreds of destinations worth falling for.
FALL FOR NEW JERSEY ADVENTURES
and discover
Get your free official travel guide more at VisitNJ.org
Dress in your best living dead threads for the annual Zombie Walk on Oct. 8, where you can join the procession as punk rock and metal music blasts along the boardwalk. After, tour the fascinating (and haunted!) museum at Paranormal Books & Curiosities, then take the Ghosts and Legends of The Downtown walking tour (Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays) to learn about AP’s most infamous spirits. On Oct. 22–23, head to nearby Long Branch for the Fall Bazaar, which boasts a costume parade, workshops, photo stations, tarot readings and more.
EASTERN STATE PENITENTIARY
WALLINGFORD, CONNECTICUT trailofterror.com
SLEEPY HOLLOW, NEW YORK hudsonvalley.org; visitsleepyhollow.com
— Taryn Pire
ESTATEPHYSICKEMLEN/PENITENTIARYSTATEEASTERNTOP:FROM NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 2022
ROAD TRIP!
The fun kicks off at Wallingford’s famous Trail of Terror that runs every weekend of the month. Head to nearby Middlefield’s Evidence of Evil for an interactive experience and participate as you brave the walkthrough haunt (weekends in October). On the 15th, take little ones to the free Halloween Craft Fair for activities, photo ops, vendors and trick-or-treating, then spice things up on the 31st by making the trip to Killdeer for the annual Halloween Carnival.
PHILADELPHIA, PENNSYLVANIA visitphilly.com
ASBURY PARK facebook.com/njzombiewalkparanormalbooksnj.com
Put Cape May’s O.G. haunted house, the Emlen Physick Estate, at the top of your Halloween to-do list, as the estate transforms into Scarecrow Alley (Oct. 1–31). There’s also a Halloween Craft & Collectibles Show (Oct. 29) and trick-or-treating (Oct. 31). Try the Magic & Mystery House Tour in the Physick House Museum to learn about the Victorians’ fascination with the unexplainable (select dates in October). Then hop aboard a trolley for the Ghosts of the Lighthouse Tour (Oct. 8) or take a Ghost Walk with psychic medium Craig McManus (Oct. 21–22).
Bring your pups to the Costume Pet Parade on Oct. 15. Head back on Oct. 22 for the Monster Bash, an all-day event with live music, a costume contest, pumpkin carving and more. Stick around the next day for shopping, activities and costumes for Witch’s Day Out. Head to Tuckerton Seaport for creek tours, ferry rides and more. Their Legends and Lore Boat Tours, which cover everything from the Jersey Devil to the shark that inspired the movie “Jaws”, will take place on select dates from Oct. 15–Nov. 6.
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202224 Healthy + Happy
The City of Brotherly Love is home to Eastern State Penitentiary, one of the country’s most haunted prisons. Tours run year-round, but come October, it’s all about spine-chilling Halloween Nights (select dates through Nov. 12). Be warned—this attraction is not for the faint of heart. Curious travelers can also stop at The Mütter Museum (all days except Tuesday) to see anatomical oddities, slices of Albert Einstein’s brain and more. If history is more your fam’s thing, take a candlelight tour of the Edgar Allan Poe National Historic Site (Oct. 28–29), where the author lived and wrote for six years, or take a ghost tour through cobblestone streets and cemeteries with the Spirits of ’76 Ghost Tour (Fridays and Saturdays in October).
CAPE MAY capemaymac.org
Pennsylvania, New York and Connecticut have plenty of spooky fun to offer—and they’re just a short ride away.
Explore the town that inspired Washington Irving’s “The Legend of Sleepy Hollow.” See locations from the book IRL or revel in over-the-top retellings of Ichabod Crane’s plight. Watch a short film and play lawn games at Irving’s historic home (weekends through Nov. 13), soak up live music and a performance of Irving’s famous tale (weekends through Halloween) or hop aboard the Haunted Hayride (Oct. 21–22) through the woods.
Spooky Fun Awaits In These TownsShore
— Taryn Pire
Trade your beach blanket for a witch’s broom this October.
HISTORIC SMITHVILLE historicsmithville.com, tuckertonseaport.org
This decision sounds clear-cut, but it was one of the hardest I ever had to make. Nobody wants to “put their parent into a home.” But my dad, Bob Quigley, needed more care than I couldMyprovide.dadwas a World War II veteran who used the GI Bill to get his doctorate in history from the University of Pennsylvania. He taught at Rosemont College and other Catholic institutions in the Philadelphia area for more than 35 years. He had three kids, including me, and threeHegrandsons.livedfornine years in assisted living and a nursing home, before eventually dying from dementia at age 90. For those nine
My parents had long ago divorced and when Dad turned 81, his cognition and health started to decline. I am part of the “sandwich generation,” which means I had to arrange care for Dad while also being a single mom of two sons and working full-time as a college teacher. Sometimes I felt like tearing my hair out.
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 25 Feature
irst, my elderly father lost bladder function due to diabetes. Then, he fell down the stairs, breaking bones in his face. Finally, his home was robbed while he was sleeping. It was then that I knew it was time to move him into an assisted living facility.
By Kathryn Quigley Things I Wish I Knew About Care for My Aging Father
The first step in providing care for an elderly parent is assessing the need and getting other family members involved. My dad was very stubborn and got angry if my siblings or I “fussed” over his messy house or forgetful memory.
Finding
When is it time to care for your parents? An NJ mom of two shares her story. QUIGLEYKATHRYNOFCOURTESYPHOTOS F
years he was taken care of, well-fed and safe. He had a room all to himself and was content. If he fell, someone picked him up. There were no more panicked trips to the ER. That hard decision turned out to be the right one.
4
I had to push past my guilt at making Dad upset and begin to take control. It’s hard to make that switch from child to caregiver but it must be done.
QUIGLEYKATHRYNOFCOURTESYPHOTOS
Here are the steps I took to make sure he was safe:
Does your parent need an in-home aide? Assisted living? Nursing home care? The website caring.com has a guide for caregivers, with sections on finding different kinds of care. At first, I hired two in-home caregivers to come during the week to check on him, tidy up and make sure he was eating. AARP has guides for choosing each kind of care.
How much money does your parent get every month in Social Security, pension and retirement accounts? What are their expenses?
Kathryn Quigley is a mom of two, a college professor and a freelance writer who lives in Gloucester County.
FIGURE OUT FINANCES
banks together and got my name on his checking accounts. I knew his revenue and expenses.
GET THE DOCUMENTS
Although I wanted Dad to stay in his home, I knew that wouldn’t be possible. His home had several flights of stairs, one of which he fell down. I contacted a real estate agent and got his home assessed. Then I made a list of nearby assisted living facilities. The Medicare webpage allows you to search by zip code and provides ratings.
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202226 Feature
I found an experienced eldercare attorney and took my father to update his will, living will, power of attorney and healthcare surrogate. AARP has a good checklist of the legal documents. Do this when the elderly person is still lucid.
I also visited several places. Here is what I looked for: cleanliness, smell, number of staff on the floor, amenities, continuation of care. I made a big mistake though and chose a facility close to my father’s house, but 40 minutes from my home. I should have picked a facility close to my place. I thought my dad would want to stay in his neighborhood, but it really didn’t matter.
Nursing homes are paid through Medicaid but most assisted living facilities are paid out of pocket. The average cost of an assisted living facility in New Jersey is $6,495 per month, according to the Genworth cost of care survey. My father was a college teacher for more than 35 years. He never made a high salary, but he did have a healthy retirement account. He hated computers and paid for everything by check, so I transferred all his bills to auto-pay. We went to his
Everyone is different, but Dad adjusted quickly and settled in. He seemed almost relieved to no longer worry about a house, his bills or becoming ill or hurt. For years, he took walks around the facility, ate ice cream, watched Phillies games on television with other residents and had visits from family.
Watching a loved one decline is not easy. But searching for proper care doesn’t have to be hard.
BE PREPARED
WHAT KIND OF HELP?
CLOCKWISE FROM ABOVE LEFT: BOB QUIGLEY WITH HIS GRANDSON; WITH HIS GRANDSONKATHRYN,2017;LASTGRANDSONYOUNGESTATHISCHRISTMASINWITHDAUGHTERANDWITHHISOUTSIDEHISASSISTEDLIVINGROOM.
What the Neuroscience of Spirituality Reveals About Our Capacity for Health, Happiness and Resilience
New Jersey Family is proud to launch ParentEd Talks! We see you putting in the work to be an amazing parent and want to help by providing easy access to expert speakers. Talk topics include overcoming trauma and overwhelm, ADHD as a gift, intimacy as you age and much more.
Transforming Trauma and Navigating Overwhelm
*Attendees of the Nov. 17 and March 22 events will also be eligible to win a SNOO Smart Sleeper Bassinet (valued at $1,695) or a $300 Happiest Baby gift card, courtesy of Happiest Baby.
How to Talk to Kids About Race at Home and in the Classroom
Curious Children, Wise Elders: How Childhood and Elderhood Shape Intelligence and Learning*
Raising Critical Thinkers: Media Literacy for the Digital Age
ParentEd2022–2023Talks
The Shifting ADHD/ADD Lens: Moving From Disability to Ability
Presents
Author Lisa Miller, Ph.D. | Nov. 1, 2022
New York Times-bestselling author Edward Hallowell, M.D., Ed.D. | March 2, 2023
Sociologist and author Christine Carter, Ph.D. | April 18, 2023
The Habits of Highly Effective Adolescents
Trauma specialist and author Laura van Dernoot Lipsky | May 4, 2023
Jeffery Robinson and Khalil Gibran Muhammad | Jan. 19, 2023
Cultural researcher and parenting expert Jessica Joelle Alexander | March 22, 2023
Behavioral scientist and author Elizabeth Jordan | June 6, 2023
The Perils of Permissive Parenting
Author Julie Bogart | Dec. 6, 2022
Modeling a Loving, Equal Partnership for Your Kids
Register now: tinyurl.com/parentedtalks
Attendees will be eligible to win a $100 Amazon gift card at each ParentEd talk.
The Extraordinary Power of a Resilient Mindset
Co-authors Sam Goldstein, Ph.D., and Robert B. Brooks, Ph.D. | Oct. 12, 2022
Author and researcher Pepper Schwartz, Ph.D. | Feb. 7, 2023
Alison Gopnik, Ph.D. | Nov. 17, 2022
The Danish Way: Insights Into International Parenting*
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202228
Get to know some of New Jersey’s premier senior living communities.
CARING FOR YOUR AGING PARENTS
A Special Advertising Section
parent in need of assistance? In addition to independent living, The Delaney offers assisted living and dedicated memory care. Their attentive team meets each resident’s needs—from help with bathing and dressing to medication reminders.
•
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202230 [CARING FOR YOUR AGING PARENTS] SPECIAL ADVERTISING SECTION
Residents have the freedom and flexibility to do what they want. Meet friends at the bar for coffee or cocktails, enjoy dinner at a fullservice restaurant or watch a movie on the big-screen TV. Have a
The Delaney of Bridgewater 901
• thedelaneyofbridgewater.com
If you worry about your parents living in a house by themselves, moving to a senior living community gives them the ability to maintain their independence while introducing them to new opportunities. The Delaney of Bridgewater offers beautiful private residences where maintenance is taken care of. Residents can choose from a villa or apartment. All are well-appointed and come with scheduled housekeeping and most utilities.
The Delaney also features Heartfelt Connections—A Memory Care Program®, which offers people with Alzheimer’s and related dementias the care, respect and quality of life they deserve, along with a sense of security and peace of mind for loved ones. The Delaney is expertly managed by Life Care Services®, An LCS® Company, with more than 50 years of experience in senior living. Frontier Rd., Bridgewater 732-733-4568
and are perfect for entertaining. In your own suite, you’ll find large windows and contemporary design features to promote your comfort and safety. Residents enjoy a robust calendar of events and programs where they can continue enjoying their passions. Scratch-made cuisine is served all day, prepared with fresh, seasonal ingredients by a talented culinary team. You’re invited to take a tour of the model suites and meet the highly trained, compassionate team members who will be happy to discuss the community’s approach to personalized assisted living and expert memory care. Visit SunriseLivingston.com to book a tour.
When you think of senior living, you may not think of a lush, wooded retreat, but Sunrise of Livingston will quickly change your mind. Situated on over three acres with serene forested surroundings, this brand new community provides both the beauty of nature as well as the convenience of being close to shops, restaurants, parks, and medical support. On the outside, you’ll find beautifully landscaped green spaces, including a walking path with benches and spacious terraces for relaxing and dining. Inside, elegant decor meets senior-friendly design in a number of bright common areas that invite conversation
Sunrise of Livingston: Premier Senior Living 290 South Orange Ave , Livingston • 973-370-4603 • SunriseLivingston.com/Family
OCTOBER 2022 | NJFAMILY.COM 31 [CARING FOR YOUR AGING PARENTS] SPECIAL ADVERTISING SECTION
For more information about our upcoming fall events
contact us at admissions@mka.org MKA.ORG | 973.509.7930
When Our Students Meet the World, the World is Better for it.
At MKA we create a connection to the world, inside and outside the classroom. From our littlest learners to our graduating seniors, we build intentional pathways and partnerships to support each student’s intellectual journey as they prepare to navigate a complex world. Because of the extraordinary ways in which our students are strengthened and empowered with transferable skills, some might call these skills superpowers.
IS YOUR SELF-HARMING?TEEN Guiding New Jersey parents through those challenging years Help Your Kid FIND A JOB SAT, ACT or No? Tips to TEENManageSTRESS
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RaisingTeens
A Healthy Sense of Balance It’s been the heart of MBS for decades A COED INDEPENDENT SCHOOL, GRADES 6-12 An exceptional education must include Scan to learn more or scheduletoa tour.
Helping Your Teen Manage Stress
Raising Teens
W
MAKE SLEEP A PRIORITY
Here’s how to help your child learn to handle stress:
Teens need a lot more sleep than you think, typically 8 to 10 hours per night. In fact, research shows an improvement in grades, mood and fewer risky behaviors such as drug and alcohol use in kids who sleep well. That means parents may have to intervene if it seems like your kid isn’t able to self-regulate and get to bed on time, says Gilrain. For example, keep phones out of bedrooms (yours, too!) and place them in a central charging
always more elevated stress at the beginning of a school year,” says Kelly Moore, PsyD, director at the Center for Psychological Services at Rutgers Graduate School of Applied Professional Psychology. “There’s also been an uptick in news that causes people to feel like everything is out of our control. But we’re all going to have stress and you can’t shield your child from every stressor. As parents, we have to prepare our kids for managing fear, stress and anxiety.”
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 35
orries about school, fitting in or getting into college—along with unpredictable hormones!—are a normal part of the teen years. But sometimes kids have a hard time managing these challenges, and you may have noticed your own teen seems more stressed than ever. “One survey showed that 71 percent of parents said the pandemic had affected their kids’ mental health, with 69 percent of parents saying the pandemic was the worst thing to happen to their children,” says Kelly Gilrain, PhD, chief psychologist, Cooper University Health Care and associate professor of clinical medicine, Cooper Medical School at Rowan University. “That number may be high because parents are noticing kids’ mental health issues more often now, or it may be an actual increase in numbers. But it’s probably both reasons.”
How to empower your kids to handle anything that comes their way.
IJEAB/©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM
By Arricca Elin SanSone
In addition to the usual challenges of being a teen, plenty of other factors have been thrown into the mix recently. “Some kids have found it difficult to return to being social, and there’s
BE PROACTIVE ABOUT FINDING SUPPORT
SHOW HOW YOU HANDLE STRESS
Because teens often shut down if you suggest having “a talk,” make it spontaneous when you’re doing something else, such as driving to practice, says Moore. Ask what they think about current events, how they calm themselves when they’re feeling
SCHEDULE “FUN TIME” WITH YOUR KIDS
As most of us parents know, kids absorb what we do more easily than what we say! And of course, when parents are stressed and worried, kids pick up on that. “We have to model healthy coping skills,” says Gilrain. For example, share what you do when you’re upset, such as, “When I find myself feeling stressed, I cut off Facebook or I go for a run.” Free mindfulness apps such as Calm and Breathe can also be helpful.
worried or if they have someone besides you to talk to about what’s bothering them. It’s also fine to ask about who they follow on social media, or start a family text chain where you share videos or other social media posts with each other.
HAVE A CASUAL CONVERSATION
There’s currently a huge demand for mental health professionals, and there are often long wait times for kids to be seen. Start by talking to your child’s school and your pediatrician. Some workplaces also offer employee assistance programs to provide support for you and your family, says Gilrain. Community mental health centers and local universities may also offer counseling, while some churches offer a bridge to support until your child can be seen by a therapist. Telehealth services also have increased access, making it easier to get your kids the care they need.
As much as possible, make your household’s schedule predictable. “Stress is born out of feeling a loss of control,” says Moore. Create structure with little rituals: Walk the dog together, have teens help with grocery shopping trips and make a point of eating dinner as a family on Sunday evenings. Also, do the necessary prep to make sure there’s not a morning rush out the door on school days, such as setting out cereal bowls the night before and making sure backpacks are ready and by the door.
GET EVERYONE MOVING
JASONDOIY/©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM
You know your child best, so watch for signs you should seek help, says Moore. Red flags may include grades that begin slipping, changes in eating habits (eating more or less), trouble sleeping, refusing to do things they once enjoyed, unwillingness to talk, isolating, increased irritability or more frequent emotional outbursts. Also, some kids complain of headaches or stomachaches because they don’t have the words to explain their emotional distress.
KNOW WHEN TO GET HELP
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202236 Raising Teens
station, and stop using them an hour before sleep.
“We need to find time for fun and joy together… [as simple as a game night or] a bonfire in the backyard fire pit to marshmallows.”toast
If everyone’s gotten into the habit of being couch potatoes, it’s time to move. Plan a weekend hike, go for a walk after dinner even if it’s just around the block or sit outside for 10 minutes together. “There’s a lot of research supporting how finding green space and spending time in nature supports good mental health,” says Gilrain.
The last few years have affected all of us, and it’s certainly not easy to fit in unstructured down time. “But we need to find time for fun and joy together,” says Gilrain. It can be as simple as conversation cards that prompt discussions, such as TableTopics, a weekly family movie or game night, or a bonfire in the backyard fire pit to toast marshmallows. Fun is never a waste of time!
STICK TO A ROUTINE
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 37 FALL OPEN HOUSE SUNDAY, OCT. www.maryhelp.org/ohreg/23RD 80-Year Tradition 16.33-Acre Campus College and Career Focus Academically Challenging AP & Dual Enrollment Courses 100% College Attendance Nurturing, Safe Environment Full Athletics & Arts Programs MARY HELP OF CHRISTIANS ACADEMY 659 BELMONT AVENUE NORTH HALEDON, NJ 07508 973.790.6200 | MARYHELP.ORG
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Raising Teens
By Ronnie Koenig
39
The reasons behind cutting and other behaviors—and how you can help
UNDERSTANDING SELF-HARM
Is Your Self-Harming?Teen
Sometimes, self-harm can be due to a mental health problem such as depression, bipolar disorder, eating disorders or obsessive thinking. Some people may have trouble controlling their impulses and cutting can become a compulsive behavior. A mental health professional is the best person to help deal with these serious issues.
For teens who get over cutting, the first step is almost always admitting to the behavior and talking about it with a trusted person. That could be a parent, a teacher, a school counselor or a doctor.“Teens will also respond better if there is a conversation and not a confrontation,” says Lamourt. Establish early on that open communication will be rewarded. Besides speaking to your teen’s pediatrician and a therapist, parents can get kids involved in activities that are connecting and not isolating. Lamourt suggests keeping a close eye on teens’ social media and possibly stopping their use of it until they feel better.
he subject of self-harm can be difficult to talk about, especially when it comes to teens. It’s troubling to see your child cut themselves on purpose. The reasons why a teen may cut themselves with a sharp object can seem bewildering to parents but it’s often prompted by a need to deal with overwhelming emotions. A teen without other coping skills might turn to cutting due to relationship problems, loss of a loved one or any other number of reasons. If your teen is cutting, you might feel helpless, angry, upset and frustrated. Thankfully, there are things you can do to help.
Often, cutting begins as an impulsive activity and in most cases is not a suicide attempt. Teens may want to experience a feeling of “waking up” from numbness or use cutting as a way to express anger. Most kids who cut do not want to die—in fact they may do it because they want to feel better. Remind teens that while cutting may provide a temporary feeling of “relief” it’s not a solution for the underlying problems.
“The most common types of self-harm are cutting; punching yourself or punching things (like a wall); burning yourself with cigarettes, matches or candles; pulling out hair; poking objects through body openings, breaking bones or bruising yourself,” says Ivan Lamourt, PsyD, director of counseling services at St. Benedict’s Preparatory School in Newark.
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If you suspect your teen is cutting, make safety the number one priority, says Wasser. “We want to make the home environment as safe as possible. This includes limiting the teen’s access to things that they can potentially use to cut themselves, including knives and razors,” he says. “Parents are encouraged to educate themselves about cutting and the reasons why their teen may be engaging in this behavior. A supportive, non-accusatory and non-judgmental approach to conversations surrounding cutting tends to work best.”
While cutting is often thought of as something girls do, in recent years counselors have seen an increase in this behavior in boys as well. “We have seen a variety of issues where boys have resorted to not only cutting themselves, but also placing themselves in dangerous situations such as walking in traffic, walking on railroad tracks or engaging in substance abuse behavior,” says Lamourt.
“Although teenagers can be moody, they need to know that they are important in their family,” says Lamourt. “Let them know that they are appreciated and loved and foster meaningful connections with them.”
There are many reasons why a teen might engage in self-harm behaviors. Matthew B. Wasser, MD, a child and adolescent psychiatrist with Summit Health in New Providence, says self-harm behavior tends to function as an outlet for teens dealing with significant emotional distress.
Ask your child what’s going on using clear, direct, nonjudgmental language, suggests Lamourt. He says social isolation, which can be a byproduct of too much social media, can also be a cause. “We need to help teenagers to understand that feelings are not facts and to talk about situations,” he says. “It is imperative to help teenagers to understand
Teens should also know that cutting can become a serious health risk. They may misjudge the depth of a cut or a cut may become infected, requiring medical attention and even hospitalization.
TALKING TO YOUR TEEN
“The teen may be experiencing an episode of depression or anxiety,” says Wasser. “They could be dealing with interpersonal, academic or social struggles. Contacting a mental health professional is one of the most important steps that a parent can take to help a teen who is engaging in selfharm. Speaking with the teen’s pediatrician or school counselor would be a great place to start.”
their feelings accurately so they are able to deal with their emotions appropriately. It’s important to seek professional help to help teens deal with their powerful emotions.”
TAKING STEPS TOWARD HEALING
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202240 Success Begins At Westmont Mendham Acceptingwestmontmontessori.org908-879-6355applicationsfor2023-2024 FIND FINDMOVESWHATYOU.YOURY. At the Y, you’ll find countless opportunities to get moving and experience the joy of better health. All it takes is one first step. LEARN MORE GREATER SOMERSET COUNTY YMCA gscymca.org/care The MorrowElisabethSchool A leader in N–8 education, The Elisabeth Morrow School personalizes learning for each child, cultivating their unique spark and innate creativity. Through an engaging project-based and inquiry-driven curriculum, our students connect their learning across Contactsubjects.ouradmissions team to learn how we inspire students to become curious scholars, ethical leaders, and global citizens and why our graduates are sought after by the most prestigious secondary day and boarding schools. Est. 1930 | Serving students age 2–grade 8 elisabethmorrow.org | 201-568-5566 ext. 7212 435 Lydecker St., Englewood, NJ 07631
Children under the age of 18 are considered minors in New Jersey and must obtain working papers before seeking employment. Blank working papers are available from your child’s local school district or at nj.gov/labor. Teens as young as 14 are eligible to receive working
In hiring young teens, it’s important for both the employer and employee to be aware of the labor laws, says Jennifer Thompson, executive director of the New Jersey chapter of the National Association of Social Workers. “Not only are there laws on the number of hours teens are permitted to work, but meal breaks, wages and what machinery is permitted are important to understand, as well,” Thompson says. Legal hours for minors are specified on the back of working papers.
WORKING PAPERS AND LABOR LAWS
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 41 GCHUTKA/MONKEYBUSINESSIMAGES©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM:TOPFROM
hese days, it seems like help wanted signs are hanging on storefronts everywhere. But for teens with little to no work experience, actually landing a job can be tricky. Still, this past August, 37.7 percent of 16-19-year-old teenagers participated in the workforce, according to data released by the Bureau of Labor Statistics. And teen unemployment rates are relatively low—about 11 percent in the summer of 2022.
By Heidi L. Borst
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School guidance counselors can also provide helpful insight and resources to teens who are job hunting, says Abraham. He advises teens to look online or in their local newspaper for jobs. “Also, they can introduce themselves to business owners as someone looking for work [even if they aren’t advertising open positions]. This is something that employers typically appreciate, as it shows initiative,” Abraham says.
ENCOURAGE YOUR TEEN
Raising Teens
Tips to search for and find the right first work opportunity
papers.Working papers may seem like a hassle, but they’re important. That’s because they protect teens from unsafe working conditions and from working too many hours, says Carole Bhalla, founder of the former TeenJobsNJ.com site. “The teen’s employer, physician and high school must complete and sign off on them [a physical examination is required as part of the process]. The state limits the amount of hours a teen can work, especially during the school year,” Bhalla says.
Even so, finding a first job can be daunting, and while it’s natural for your teen to be nervous, knowing where to look and how to prepare can make the process less scary. Maybe your teen is actively looking for a job, or maybe they’re not that into it—and you’d love to motivate them. Either way, read on for expert tips on making that job hunt a little less intimidating.
The best place to find job openings are the mom and pop stores in your community, says Thompson. “The local ice cream shop or hardware store are easy to apply for; the owners typically have more grace in working with younger employees, and in most cases, it provides your child the opportunity to work alongside people in the community—including their friends.”Other popular places for students to work include local restaurants, recreational leagues, gyms and camps, says Harold Abraham, EdD, educational leadership professor at Montclair State University.
Bhalla says her own 16-year-old walked into a local diner with a help wanted sign and got hired on the spot. “Pounding the pavement is a very effective way to find a job. Local Facebook community groups are a good resource,” she says.
GetYourHelpingTeenaJob
WHERE TO FIND JOBS
To motivate your teen to want to get a job, it’s important to maintain a positive attitude towards your own work, says Thompson. “Showing excitement and passion towards your career can have a huge impact on your children. Think about it: if you frequently complain about your job, why would your child want to get their own?” she says. It’s crucial to
• FEMA is a nationwide organization that helps people before, during and after disasters: fema.gov
“When I first started working, I was very nervous because I thought I would do something wrong or mess something up,” Sha’Born says. “But throughout the weeks of meeting the kids, I started to open up more, and feel more comfortable and confident.”
higher-ups at their jobs,” Thompson says.
Teen Volunteering
• UNITED WAY provides a variety of volunteer opportunities to give back to the nj211.org/volunteer-opportunitiescommunity:
Every parent wants their child to grow up to be successful and what we teach our teens is important, says Thompson. Talk to your teens about a healthy work-life balance as well as how to be a great worker. “Encourage your child to show up early, to work to their full potential and to learn from
maintain a positive attitude towards working, and encourage your child to get their own job when the time comes.
Working helps our children understand the value of money, Abraham says. “It also teaches them how to successfully manage their money and to make healthy financial decisions—skills that will benefit them for their entire lifetime,” he says.
(NJVOAD) is a coalition of organizations with volunteer opportunities: njvoad.org
If your teen wants to get some volunteer hours along with work experience, some of the best opportunities include giving their time to soup kitchens, homeless shelters, animal rescue centers, Boys & Girls Clubs and at various non-profits, Thompson suggests. You can also encourage them to volunteer in the circle they typically operate in, like working the snack booth at their high school’s football game or volunteering for a local youth team, she says. Here are some volunteer resources in New Jersey:
• NEW JERSEY ORGANIZATIONSVOLUNTARYACTIVEIN DISASTER
THE VALUE OF WORK EXPERIENCE
And when it’s time for the interview, first impressions count, so don’t dress down—it’s better to be overdressed, Bhalla says. And remember that even if they don’t get the job, teens will learn serious life lessons during the interview process. “Parents need to encourage perseverance in their children and teach them not to give up after the first rejection,” Bhalla says.
Once your teen has locked down an interview, they should prepare by speaking with others in the same field, says Abraham. Help them create a list of questions that may be asked, and have them practice their responses. Doing so will help them to craft and refine their answers and allow them to speak knowledgeably, he says.
• AMERICAN RED CROSS helps coordinate blood donations and disaster relief services: redcross.org
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY42 FATCAMERA/PRODUCTIONSSDI/STURTI©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM::TOPFROMCLOCKWISE
Parents should remind their kids that facing adversity is normal, Thompson says. What’s most important is their outlook and their ability to effectively problem-solve throughout the process.
—Heidi L. Borst is a mother, writer and fitness enthusiast based in Wilmington, NC.
Reassure your teen that a little anxiety is normal when they start a job, but that it’s often short-lived. Sha’Born Allen, a 14-year-old student at College Achieve Public School in Neptune, started his first job this summer as a camp counselor at the Boys & Girls Clubs of Monmouth County.
• JERSEY CARES is an organization that provides a detailed list of volunteer opportunities across the state: jerseycares.org
• STUDENTS DEMAND ACTION is a coalition of students working to end gun violence across the nation: state/new-jersey/studentsdemandaction.org/
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 43 WHschool.org 908.754.1882 Students collaborate,discover,excel
“We often hear students tell us that the SAT ‘felt easier’ (likely because of the longer time limits), but when it comes down to
“The best way to determine what test a student is better-suited for is to take a practice test for both the ACT and the SAT,” she advises. Students should make sure they’re taking an official ACT or SAT exam, made by either the ACT or College Board. It’s critical that students take these practice tests in a way that replicates the real test environment. Families can then make a decision on which test to take based on actual scores, rather than assumptions or feelings.
What factors determine a student’s test selection can depend on a few things, she says. “First and foremost, there are many students out there who have certain strengths that make them better suited for one test over the other. For example, a student’s math ability can have a large impact. For students intimidated by mathematics or reliant on their calculators, the ACT can often be a better test.”
“The answer often depends on who the student is,” says Amy Seeley, president of Test Pros LLC, based in Lakewood, OH, which offers in-person and online tutoring. Seeley says all colleges and universities now accept scores from both tests interchangeably.
The ACT math section has much more straightforward questions, and students can use a calculator on all 60 math questions. Additionally, all math questions on the ACT are multiple choice. If a student is worried about their math score affecting their overall composite, math only makes up 25 percent of a student’s ACT score. Conversely, the SAT can contain more complex math questions. On the SAT, math makes up 50 percent of the overall score.
By Ronnie Koenig None of the Above)? share insights on how to navigate testing
uring the pandemic many colleges and universities did away with requirements for standardized testing as part of the admissions process. Many saw this as a positive, but parents (and students) are now more confused than ever about which test (if any) to study for and take and what they can expect going forward.
KALI9/©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM SATor ACT
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202244
(Or
Experts
“Right now, it seems possible that the majority of colleges will remain test-optional,” Weingarten says. “However, certain states are requiring tests for students applying to their public universities (like Florida, Georgia and Tennessee, for example). So, I tell my students to study for the test and see how well they can do.”
Laurie Kopp Weingarten, president and chief educational consultant of One-Stop College Counseling, a company based in Marlboro, says the summer after 10th grade is the right time to start studying for either or both tests. “Without the pressure of schoolwork, they can make tremendous progress,” Weingarten says. But they shouldn’t devote their entire summer to studying. “I typically tell students that they should plan to study about two hours per day, five days per week, for two weeks. Then take a full-length, timed, practice test, see how much they improve, and then we alter the study plan from that.” Pushing your teen to start studying in seventh or eighth grade usually backfires, she says.
WHEN TO START PREPPING
UPCOMING CHANGES TO THE SAT
WHAT ABOUT TEST-OPTIONAL?
The new SAT will be adaptive, so if a student does well on the first section of English/reading, the second session will contain harder questions, allowing the student to achieve up to a perfect score. “It will be the same for math,” she says. “There will only be one reading question per passage, which makes a lot of students less pressured.” Both math sections will allow calculator usage (currently, one math section does not), and there will be a highlight tool on all sections.
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 45 Raising Teens
BENEFITS TO NO SAT?
Without the SAT, students will have to go on the strength of their transcript, teacher and counselor recommendations, interviews, essays and activities. Because SAT scores often correlate with parental education and income it’s often seen as discriminatory, Weingarten says. The new changes and the option to forgo the test could mean the next steps toward making education more equitable for all.
numbers that student may have a higher overall ACT score.”
Weingarten says the new SAT (which will be introduced in March 2024 for domestic students and March 2023 for international students) will be appealing to many kids. “It’s two hours 14 minutes (instead of three hours), and it’s digital,” she says. “It will only be taken on a computer, and a student can bring their own laptop or iPad if they like.” The October 2023 PSAT will also be the new, digital PSAT.
JOY+ RIGOR MSS Kindergarten students celebrate a school-wide, annual I Math Day in 2022. To find out more, visit our website to schedule a personal tour or attend an Open House. Mustard Seed School is a progressive, inclusive, Christian school located in the heart of Hoboken, educating students age 3-grade 8 • mustardseedschool.org • 201. 653. 5548
Schools that serve students with special needs are indicated with a symbol.
Check out our snapshots of independent schools in and around New Jersey.
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Is yourrightschoolprivatethefitforfamily?
The Bridge Academy 1958-B Lawrenceville Road, Lawrenceville 609-844-0770 • bridgeacademynj.org
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 2022
Founded in September 2003 by educators, parents and community members, The Bridge Academy helps students with language-based learning disabilities, including dyslexia, dysgraphia, auditory processing, and ADHD bridge the gap between potential and performance. We are a New Jersey state-approved school for ages 8-18, and the only school in New Jersey certified by the OrtonGillingham Academy. With a 3:1 ratio in reading, a 4:1 ratio in writing and math and small group instruction for other classes, The Bridge Academy uses multi-sensory techniques throughout the curriculum. Our curriculum is tailored to meet the specific needs and learning style of each student’s
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Undergraduate Teaching by U.S. News and World Report and The Princeton Review ranked Simon’s Rock among the Best Regional Colleges in the Northeast. Bard Academy is the nation’s first two-year boarding and day program designed to prepare 9th and 10th graders to start college early. Within six years of entering Bard Academy as a high school freshman, a student who matriculates into the college will earn a Bachelor of Arts degree. The academy curriculum is designed and taught by college professors.
faculty to focus on each student’s academic and social needs. The 9th–12th grade curriculum continues to reinforce reading, language and communication skills, while preparing students for the next phase of their education and life. Our faculty is trained in a variety of research-based, multi-sensory teaching techniques and strategies, including the Wilson Reading System®, Lindamood Bell® Programs and Multisensory Math®.
Banyan High School & LIFE Academy 471 Main St., Little Falls 973-785-1919 • banyanschool.com
Bard Academy & Bard College at Simon’s Rock Great Barrington, MA 413-644-4400 • admit@simons-rock.edu • simons-rock.edu
Banyan48
The LIFE (Learning Independence. Fostering Empowerment.) Academy for 18-to-21-year-old students emphasizes life and work skills in a supportive environment that builds confidence and success.
Elementary School 12 Hollywood Ave. Fairfield 973-439-1919 • banyanschool.com
Banyan High School is a private, non-profit, New Jersey Department of Education-approved School for students with significant languagebased learning disabilities. Established in 2006, the high school program provides a structured curriculum with small classes that allow our
Banyan Elementary School is a private, nonprofit, New Jersey Department of Educationapproved school for students (ages 6 to 14) with significant language-based learning disabilities. For the past 29 years, our primary focus has been the development and reinforcement of the reading, language and communication skills necessary for academic success. Our faculty is trained in a variety of research-based, multisensory teaching techniques and strategies, including the Wilson Reading System®, Lindamood Bell® Programs, Multisensory Math® and TouchMath®. With small classes, individualized attention and integrated assistive technology, we are committed to establishing the foundation that students need for learning while fostering social and interpersonal skills.
Bard College at Simon’s Rock is the only college in the country specifically designed for students ready to enter college after the 10th or 11th grade. Simon’s Rock offers a curriculum in the liberal arts and sciences, taught by supportive, highly-trained faculty who are leading scholars in their field. The college grants degrees in more than 35 majors. Simon’s Rock is ranked No. 4 for Most Innovative School and No. 5 for Best
The Gramon Family of Schools, located in Fairfield is a New Jersey Department of Education-approved private special education school dedicated to serving students ages three –21 with autism spectrum disorder and other developmental disabilities. Since 1939, The Gramon Family of Schools has supported students and their families by committing to the philosophy that every student deserves the opportunity to attain his or her highest potential. The program provides effective Individualized Educational Plans (IEP) for each student utilizing the expertise of certified teachers, clinicians, administrators and support staff. Our curriculum provides traditional and functional academics, as well as 21st century skills, which are taught and modeled through Applied Behavioral Analysis and other evidencebased instructional methods. The goal is to connect school-based educational, pre-vocational and social experiences to the community and
Immaculate Heart Academy
A leader in education for age two through eighth grade, The Elisabeth Morrow School personalizes learning for each child to cultivate their unique spark and innate creativity. Through an engaging project-based and inquiry-driven curriculum, students connect their learning across subjects. Each student in our diverse, inclusive, childcentered community further develops through social-emotional learning and experiencing our community-wide core values. Learning takes place indoors and outdoors across our 14-acre campus, which is also a certified wildlife habitat. Contact us to find out how—through initiatives in science, technology, engineering, the arts, and mathematics (STEAM), like our design studios and NuVuX partnership—The Elisabeth Morrow School prepares children to lead the way with innovative thinking in a rapidly changing world.
The Community School 11 West Forest Ave., Teaneck 201-837-8070 (Lower School) 1135 Teaneck Rd., Teaneck 201-862-1796 (High communityschoolk12nj.orgSchool)
The Masters School
IEP. Dedicated, experienced teachers nurture students to thrive and blossom into the people they are destined to be. More than 87 percent of our alumni pursue college and/or technical school after graduation. For more information visit bridgeacademynj.org or call 609-844-0770. We look forward to meeting you.
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 49
500 Van Emburgh Ave., Washington Twp. 201-445-6800 • ihanj.com
49 Clinton Ave, Dobbs Ferry, NY 914-479-6400 • mastersny.org
Far Hills Country Day School is a preschool–Grade 8 independent school that is guided by a mission to provide each child brilliant beginnings for success in the modern world through academic excellence and character development. Easily accessible from major highways, Far Hills Country Day School’s 54-acre campus includes woodlands, a pond, athletic fields, tennis courts, ageappropriate play areas including a gaga pit, and a ropes challenge course. The school champions academic excellence and emotional intelligence, challenging students to think independently and achieve confidently. The school’s shared growth mindset contributes to its experiential, studentcentered approach to learning, its welcoming community of families, and its focus on developing individual strengths. At Far Hills Country Day School, students are empowered to grow inward, outward and upward and graduate prepared to lead at the country’s most competitive secondary schools. For more information, visit fhcds.org or call 908-766-0622.
Mary Help of Christians Academy is a highly rated, private, Catholic preparatory school for young women in grades 8-12. With a student teacher ratio of 6:1, MHC Academy is recognized for its rigorous and comprehensive college preparatory programs, innovative faculty, competitive sports teams, state-ofthe-art facilities, and faith-filled Salesian family environment. Located on more than 16 acres MHC Academy offers individualized attention for each student to develop her gifts and grow in self-confidence and maturity. Come see for yourself what a difference a Mary Help education makes! Register now for a visit. Our Fall Open House is scheduled for Sunday, Oct. 23 and our Preview Day is Friday, Nov. 18. Shadow visits and individualized tours are also offered year-round.
Immaculate Heart Academy is an all-female college preparatory high school in the Archdiocese of Newark, which has as its purpose the complete education of young women. By cultivating the traditional Christian values of the Roman Catholic Church and upholding exceptional academic standards, IHA offers a unique educational experience. The school’s mission, both at its foundation in 1960 and today, is to provide quality Catholic education to young women in an atmosphere characterized by respect for the individual and the Christian community, and a high level of family involvement. IHA’s inaugural Scholae@theheart Program launched in the 2022-23 academic year. This novel program enhances IHA’s superlative college preparatory curriculum by providing increased opportunities for specialization and recognition in areas that capitalize on students’ strengths and interests. By instilling in its students a sense of responsibility, confidence, justice, peace and compassion, IHA prepares its young women for life throughout the 21st century.
Far Hills Country Day School 697 Route 202, Far Hills 908- 766-0622 • fhcds.org
Mary Help of Christians Academy
659 Belmont Ave., North Haledon 973-790-6200 • maryhelp.org
The Elisabeth Morrow School 435 Lydecker St., Englewood 201-568-5566• elisabethmorrow.org
Set on 96 picturesque acres overlooking the Hudson River, The Masters School is a leading
Community School is an amazing place. Serving the bright child with learning difficulties for 54 years, the school provides students with individualized skilled remedial help, including reading instruction that utilizes the OrtonGillingham and Wilson Language Training approaches. Speech and language services, counseling, college guidance and a full transition program are provided. The New Jersey Student Learning Standards and Common Core Standards are closely followed throughout the curriculum. All classes are grouped according to skill level, are small in size and offer high-level course content in addition to specific remediation. A wide variety of elective subjects are offered at all grade levels. The result is a challenging college preparatory program that includes a full array of extracurricular experiences and a strong interscholastic sports program. At Community School, each and every one of our students can excel and is able to reach his or her full potential.
The Gramon Family of Schools 20 Just Rd., 973-808-6279Fairfield•gramonfamily.com
prepare students for their lifelong journey. To learn more, visit gramonfamily.org or schedule a tour at admissions@gramon.org.
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NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202250 State approved….serving students of average to above average potential from NJ and PA w/LD such as dyslexia, auditory processing, ADHD, dysgraphia. The only accredited Orton-Gillingham program in NJ. 1958B Lawrenceville Rd., Lawrenceville, NJ 08648 609-844-0770 | bridgeacademynj.org • Multi-sensory curriculum • 3:1 student to staff ratio • Summer program • OG Teacher Training OPEN HOUSE - Nov. 8, 9:30 Please RSVP GREAT BARRINGTON, MASSACHUSETTS DISCOVERY DAY October 15 Bard College at Simon’s Rock OPEN HOUSE November 5 Bard Academy VISIT NOW Visit simons-rock.edu for complete list of virtual & in-person events Join the early college movement today at Bard Academy and start college early after 10th grade at Bard College at Simon’s Rock.
422 Willow Ave., Hoboken 201- 653- 5548 • mustardseedschool.org
day and boarding school that engages fifth through 12th grade students with a challenging academic program in a welcoming environment. Our renowned seminar-style learning approach produces independent thinkers who graduate prepared for college, career and life. Day and boarding students benefit from our vibrant 24/7 campus, accessible residential faculty, proximity to New York City and globally diverse community. Whether you come to campus or join us for a virtual event, we are excited to introduce you to the people, programs and places of Masters. Register for a visit at mastersny.org/admission/ admission-events. Campus tours begin Sept. 14; Open House is Saturday, Oct. 15.
3 Ryerson Ave., Caldwell 973-226-0660 • msdacademy.org
At MKA we create a connection to the world, inside and outside the classroom. From our youngest learners to our graduating seniors, we build intentional pathways and partnerships to support each student’s intellectual journey as they prepare to navigate a complex world. Because of the extraordinary ways in which our students are strengthened and empowered with transferable skills, some might call these skills superpowers. Attend one of our upcoming information sessions to learn more. For more information, visit mka.org/admissions or contact the admissions office at admissions@mka.org or 973-509-7930.
Mount St. Dominic Academy
Mustard Seed School
Montclair Kimberley Academy 201 Valley Rd., Montclair 973-746-9800 • mka.org
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 51
Joy + Rigor. Founded in 1979 by a small group of innovative teachers and located in the heart of Hoboken, Mustard Seed School (MSS) is an independent, inclusive Christian school dedicated to the education of preschool (age three) through grade 8 students. We are a Reggio Emilia-inspired community, warmly honoring and encouraging the innate curiosity of our students with a rigorous curriculum that both challenges and inspires results. More than 90 percent of our students are accepted into their first choice in high school, including Léman Prep Manhattan, High Tech, Calhoun and Grace
Founded in 1892, Mount St. Dominic Academy is a private college preparatory school for young women located in Caldwell, New Jersey. Rooted in the Dominican traditions of our history and dedicated to the modern realization of our mission of educating and empowering young women, we guide and nurture our students on their personal journeys of self-discovery. Through a blend of rigorous academics, explorations of faith, compelling co-curriculars, competitive athletics, engaging arts and service initiatives, our students learn and lead in an environment that fosters excellence, respect, empathy and integrity. An education at the Mount helps create a foundation for success in college, career and beyond. An education at the Mount is an investment in your daughter’s future.
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Morristown Beard School 70 Whippany Rd., Morristown 973-539-3032 • mbs.net
650 Great Road, Princeton 609-924-6700 • pds.org
Church in 2022. Four of our students in the Class of 2022 were offered full Sheehan Scholarships to Saint Peter’s Prep. MSS students consistently score remarkably high in MAP testing. Young alums remember their time at MSS fondly, sharing that the project-based, integrated learning with its emphasis on character and service sparked lives of meaning and purpose.
Princeton Day School is the region’s premier independent day school for students from Pre-K through Grade 12. Student-driven academics and demonstrable diversity, equity and inclusion practices fuel our mission to nurture the mind, body and character of each student. Depth of learning, skills acquisition and innovative problemsolving define our expertly facilitated programs and opportunities including the highly selective Science Research Experience Program, Jacobson Music Scholar Program, Top Model UN, Energy & Climate Scholars and more. Outstanding athletics in a new LEED-certified 30,000+ square-foot athletic center. Learn more today at pds.org. Open Campus Day will be Oct. 16.
Saint Ann School 34 Rossa Ave., Lawrenceville 609-882-8077 • saintannschool.org
Ensuring the growth and well-being of every student has always been the cornerstone of the philosophy at Morristown Beard School, an independent, co-educational day school for grades 6 to 12. Every student is empowered to discover an intellectual pathway that excites and inspires them. Signature academic programs in Middle and Upper School offer students a wide range of options for learning as well as the support and structure needed to succeed in their individual academic journeys. Balanced with a commitment to experiential learning and social-emotional development, those programs provide a robust learning experience that engages each student. Highlights of the beautiful 22-acre campus include the Center for Innovation & Design, the 25,000-square-foot Math & Science Center, a 630-seat performing arts theater, premier athletic facilities, and Science On a Sphere®, a global display system developed by NOAA that uses computers and video projectors to display planetary data onto a six-foot diameter sphere.
Saint Ann School is a family-oriented community that strives to meet the needs of the individual student. We encourage our students to succeed academically. We provide a quality, faith-based education to students of all religious backgrounds,
Princeton Day School
classes for high school students, but small enough to provide an intimate learning environment for everyone. The campus houses state-of-theart STEM labs, three art studios, the Snowdon Library with a Center for Global Learning and videoconferencing center, a television studio, outdoor classroom, two gymnasiums, a 25-yard swimming pool, tennis courts and two new athletic turf fields. The school truly embodies its six core values: integrity, opportunity, support, diversity, community and sustainability. As the school celebrates its 140th year, we invite you to learn more about us.
Westmont Montessori School
Villa Walsh Academy, conducted by the Religious Teachers Filippini, is a college preparatory Catholic school for young women in grades 7–12. Located on a beautiful 120acre campus, Villa Walsh Academy offers an exceptional learning experience through a rigorous academic curriculum and diverse offerings of extracurricular activities. The Athletic Department provides student athletes with opportunities to participate in a variety of successful programs. We pride ourselves on preparing students with the knowledge and confidence to succeed within higher education. Students are recognized for their academic achievements. Students receive multiple scholarships and attend top colleges and universities armed with the comprehensive education that the school provides. Historically, 100 percent of graduating students enter four-year colleges and universities. Villa Walsh Academy students are women of integrity with a deep moral value and a commitment to service that is grounded in the Catholic faith.
908-879-6355 • westmontmontessori.org
The Wardlaw + Hartridge School is a coeducational, college preparatory day school with students in early childhood through grade 12. The campus is located on 36 wooded acres at the conjunction of Middlesex, Union and Somerset counties. With an early childhood program that offers hands-on experiential learning, to an Upper School with rich academic offerings, the school is large enough to offer 19 Advanced Placement
Trinity Hall is an independent, all-girls school that educates and empowers young women in the Catholic tradition through an innovative college preparatory program grounded in our four core values of leadership, respect, perseverance, and faith. Trinity Hall prepares each student to achieve her full potential as she embraces her place in the world. The school offers award-winning academic, arts and athletics programming, uniquely tailored to nurture the intellectual, spiritual, social, and physical gifts of each individual, forming a community of young women who will become leaders and living examples of the benefit of a faith and value-based learning environment. Experience excellence at Trinity Hall. Attend an Open House event held on Saturday, Oct. 1 and Wednesday, Nov. 2. Entrance Exam dates are Saturday, Oct. 22, Nov. 19 and Jan. 28.
• trinityhallnj.org
Trinity Hall
See trinityhallnj.org for details.
101 Corregidor Rd., Tinton 732-291-1297Falls
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202252
Villa Walsh Academy
and we are committed to a diverse, forward-looking curriculum that includes technology instruction, multicultural programs and hands-on science lessons. We are a recognized Blue Ribbon School of Excellence and are fully accredited by AdvancED and Middle States Association Commissions on Elementary and Secondary Schools with a diverse group of educators committed to academic excellence. We offer small classes, average 20:1 student-teacher ratio, a Pre-K program for 3- and 4-year-old children, full-day kindergarten to eighthgrade classes and an afterschool program. We are continuing to accept registrations for students in grades preschool to eighth grade, always putting the safety and well-being of our students first. Schedule your personal tour today at saintannschool.org/ contact-us
901 State Rte. 10, Whippany
973-500-6480 • winstonprep.edu
577 State Route 24, Mendham
455 Western Ave., Morristown 973-538-3680 • villawalsh.org
Winston Preparatory School
Winston Preparatory School (Winston Prep) is a leading private school network for students with learning differences, including dyslexia, ADHD and non-verbal learning difficulties (NVLD). Winston Prep Whippany offers students grades 4-12 with learning disabilities a highly individualized, holistic, and responsive education. Winston Prep faculty carry out ongoing, in-depth assessments to cultivate a deep understanding of students, helping them to advance at a meaningful pace and giving them the tools to continue independently learning and growing. All of our campuses provide intense skill remediation while fostering independence, resilience, responsibility and self-awareness. Come to our next open house on Oct. 18 and learn more about our educational philosophy and tour our school. Visit winstonprep. edu or contact Meredith Fisher, admissions director, mfisher@winstonprep.edu.
The Wardlaw + Hartridge School
SPECIAL ADVERTISING SECTIONPrivate School Previews TRADEFG/©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM
Welcome to Westmont, an American Montessori Society (AMS) and Middle States Commission on Higher Education (MSCHE) Accredited School! Flash forward a year from now—a decade from now—what will your child have in common with today’s most remarkable innovators, such as the Google co-founders and the creator of Amazon.com? The foundation of a Montessori education! The Westmont Montessori School, now celebrating its 58th anniversary, is a unique learning environment, alive with an atmosphere that embraces and nurtures children, along with a strong community of parents, students, faculty, staff and board members dedicated to one common goal: providing lifelong academic, social, and emotional skills to support each child in the ever-changing world. Discover Westmont for your child!
1295 Inman Ave., Edison 908-754-1882 • whschool.org
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 53
EXPLORE MASTERS FOR OR 7-DAY BOARDING
5-DAY
The Masters School sits on 96 bucolic acres overlooking the Hudson River, 12 miles from the heart of NYC. Our renowned seminar-style learning approach produces independent thinkers who enjoy being challenged, whether it’s in the classroom, on the field or on the stage. Day and boarding students benefit from our vibrant 24/7 campus, globally diverse community, and accessible residential faculty.
Join us on a campus tour this fall. Contact admission@mastersny.org. OPEN HOUSE | OCTOBER 15 | 9AM 49 Clinton Avenue, Dobbs Ferry, NY www.mastersny.org
Atlantic Health System is making it even easier for women to schedule a screening mammogram by offering online appointments at 10 locations throughout northern and central New Jersey. A prescription or referral is encouraged but not necessary for an annual routine screening mammogram.
Scheduling is Easy
According to the National Cancer Institute (NCI), only five to ten percent of breast cancer is hereditary, which means that most women who get breast cancer have no family history. Breast cancer risk increases with age, and the greatest risks for breast cancer are being a woman and getting older. However, when caught in its earliest stage, breast cancer has a survival rate of 99 percent.
Lydia Nadeau, executive director of Atlantic Health System Cancer Care explained, “Our moms, our friends and our colleagues are really important to us and we ask them a lot of questions. But we really never bring into the conversation the question: did you have your mammogram this year? We need to say, you’re really important to me and this is something we should talk about.”
That’s why breast cancer screening is so critical. Having consistent mammograms is the best way to improve early detection of breast cancer. While that message has been promoted for years, life often gets in the way and people may delay or forget to schedule their annual mammogram. Especially during the last few years, regular appointments have at times taken a backseat. This could be dangerous if it means foregoing an opportunity to detect cancer before it spreads.
Atlantic Health System’s #AskHer Campaign
It’s Time to #AskHer
Lisa Bash, MD, medical director of The Breast Center at Atlantic Health System’s Chilton Medical Center, said that mammograms are key to screening for breast cancer. Mammograms can detect breast cancer at its earliest stages, before women feel a lump, and when it is most treatable. The mortality from breast cancer has decreased by 30 percent since the start of screening mammography in the 1990s. Getting a screening mammogram annually is a straightforward, safe and inexpensive way for women to be active in their breast health. Early detection translates to better outcomes and ultimately saves lives, so women should schedule a mammogram every year.
J
Breast cancer can truly affect anyone, so Atlantic Health System created #AskHer, a campaign to encourage all of us to reach out to the women in our lives—mothers, sisters, wives, and friends—and urge them to make their appointment for an annual mammogram. For the seventh consecutive year, the campaign introduces conversations about the importance of mammograms and has been a call to action to women locally and nationwide.
FROM OUR ADVERTISING PARTNER VISIT ATLANTICHEALTH.ORG/ASKHER OR CALL (844) 343-3540 TO LEARN MORE. NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202254
oin Atlantic Health System in asking the women in your life if they have had their annual mammogram. Did you know that being a woman and getting older are the main risk factors for breast cancer? One in eight women will be diagnosed with breast cancer in her lifetime. In fact, it remains the second leading cause of cancer death in women.
Being a woman and getting older are the main risk factors for breast cancer, but not the only ones. Knowing your risks, as well as having regular mammograms, can help find breast cancer at an early stage, when treatment is most successful.
SmokingBeingCombinedFamilyGettingfemaleolderhistoryhormone
BREAST CANCERRisk Factors: therapy
Don’t wait, book your mammogram online, or call 844-343-3540
Dense breasts
Schedule your Annual Mammogram
Being overweight or obeseDrinking alcohol
COMING IN IDEASSUMMERJANUARYVACATIONFORYOURFAMILY (INCLUDING THE JERSEY SHORE, ROAD TRIPS, PLANE TRIPS AND MORE!) + WHAT TRAVEL TEACHES YOUR KIDS ©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM/MONKEYBUSINESSIMAGES Contact Marcy at marcy@njfamily.com to be a part of this issue! BUSINESSES!CALLINGALLTRAVEL
family history,” says Catherine Loveland-Jones, MD, MS, FACS, assistant professor of surgery, breast surgery division head and co-director of Janet Knowles Breast Cancer Center, MD Anderson Cancer Center at Cooper. “That’s why women of average risk should start getting mammograms at age 40 and annually after that.” Here’s what else you need to know about your breast health:
That doesn’t mean you’re in the clear if you have no family history of breast cancer. “While family history is a factor, many women diagnosed with breast cancer do not have a
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 57 Me Time
GET REGULAR SCREENINGS
Although there is some variability in what various medical organizations recommend, many breast health practitioners still encourage annual mammograms. “There’s some wiggle room on official recommendations, but for those of us in the field, we suggest annual screenings, starting at age 40,” says Kumar.
By Arricca Elin SanSone
4 WAYS TO STAY ON TOP OF YOUR BREAST HEALTH
Here’s how to take care of yourself for you and your family
RAMIREZCASTILLOELIHUMARCOS/©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM
t’s not easy fitting in self-care these days, but there are some things that are non-negotiable. At the top of the list should be keeping an eye on your own health, including your breast health. “The two driving factors for breast cancer risk are being a woman and getting older,” says Shicha Kumar, MD, assistant professor of surgery, attending breast surgeon and breast surgical oncologist at Rutgers Cancer Institute of New Jersey. “There are things you can’t control, such as a family history, but there also are some lifestyle factors that may help reduce risk.”
that states whether or not you have dense breasts, indicating how much fatty tissue your breasts contain. About half the population does have dense breasts, which means a slightly increased risk for breast cancer. “For those women, we recommend additional screenings such as an ultrasound at the time of mammography,” says Loveland-Jones. Though no test is foolproof, studies have shown that mammograms along with ultrasound may find slightly more cancers in women with dense breasts.
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202258 Me Time GORODENKOFF/©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM
ASK YOUR DOCTOR ABOUT PERSONAL RISK
clinical breast exams by your provider were also recommended. According to the American Cancer Society, research hasn’t shown a clear benefit of regular physical breast exams by your provider to help find breast cancer early, as long as you’re also getting your screening mammograms. If women find a lump, it’s usually during normal activities like bathing or dressing. You know your body best; it’s always smart to be familiar with how your breasts and nipples normally look and feel and report any changes, no matter how subtle, to your doctor ASAP.
TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF
For women of Ashkenazi Jewish heritage, breast cancer risk is slightly higher, likely due to inherited gene mutations such as BRCA1 and BRCA2, says Kumar. Talk to your doctor about whether or not you would benefit from genetic testing to identify gene mutations. In addition, women with genetic mutations will need more frequent and additional types of screening such as MRIs. Of course, women with a personal history of breast cancer also should be screened more frequently.
Many factors can impact your risk, including your history of smoking, obesity, how much alcohol you drink and hormonal history, such as when your periods started and if applicable, when they stopped, how many kids you have, how old you were when you had your first child and the use of HRT, says Kumar. Breast health clinics can do a more detailed personal risk assessment, so discuss with your doctor if you should see a breast health specialist for further evaluation.
“Early detection does make a difference.”
However, certain women may need to start screening earlier. For example, if a first-degree family member, such as your mom or sister was diagnosed with breast cancer, you should start screening 10 years earlier than their age of diagnosis (so, if she was diagnosed at age 45, you should start screening at age 35), says Loveland-Jones.Formanyyears,
DISCUSS ADDITIONAL SCREENINGS FOR DENSE BREASTS
Granted, that’s easier said than done with everything else on your plate. But while there’s no magic potion, certain lifestyle behaviors you can control may reduce your risk. “Things that make your heart and lungs healthy are good for your breasts, too,” says Kumar. That includes maintaining a healthy weight, getting moderate exercise of 150 minutes per week, eating a diet rich in fruits and vegetables and avoiding or limiting alcohol to two drinks per week, according to Kumar.
The good news is that both surgeries and medical treatments have come a long way in treating breast cancer in the last 10 years. “Many new drugs such as immunotherapy have made a huge difference in longevity,” says Kumar. “We’ve also learned to develop treatment tailored to each patient. There’s no one-sizefits-all approach.”
You may have noticed that line on your mammogram report
“...we suggest annual screenings starting at age 40.”
Get Tickets: NYCWFF.ORG PLATINUM MOBILITYOFFICIALPARTNER PREMIEROFFICIAL AIRLINE BEER AND DISTRIBUTORWATER ® OFFICIALPARTNERRADIO HEADQUARTERHOTEL Must be 21 or older with valid ID to consume alcohol. The Festival promotes responsible drinking. Photos: Courtesy of Getty Images | Sponsors confirmed as of 9.9.2022 For more information, please call 800.764.8773 PRESENTING AND OFFICIAL CREDIT CARD AND BANKSPIRITSWINEPROVIDEREXCLUSIVEOFANDHOSTED BY TITLE OFFICIAL DRY DRINKS & MIXOLOGY RETAILER DIAMOND Celebrate the 15th anniversary of New York City’s premier wine and food festival. tickets on SALE ! CHECK OUT OURFAMILY FRIENDLY EVENTS
Weekends at • Sept. 17 thru Oct. 30 • CORN MAZE 6 Acres • Tractor pulled WAGON HAYRIDE • Pumpkin Picking • FEEDING ZOO: cows, piglets, goats and sheep! • 30 foot Tree House Slide for those 42” and above • Kid friendly Greenhouse • Tractor Train Ride • Mini Maze • Apple Cider and Fresh Donuts Lupardi’s Farm See You Soon! 75 Blanch Avenue, Closter, New Jersey 07624 lupardisnursery.com • 201-768-0017H.I.C. #13VH00632300 OPENS SEPT. 17 NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202260 FOLLOW US! @ NEWJERSEYFAMILY @ NEWJERSEYFAMILYMAG @ NJFAMILYMAG /NEWJERSEYFAMILY DONSON/DELMAINE©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM
Oktoberfest at SteelStacks™ Bethlehem, PA
See how Lehigh Valley does festivals. by Craig
find inspiring lehigh valley trip ideas, things to do, festivals, restaurants, hotels, and family fun. discoverlehighvalley.com share your #LVMadePossible moments! @LehighValleyPA © Photograph
Roberts
Blue’s Clues & You!
It’s Showtime! Head to one of these local stages to catch a fall theater performance the kids will never forget.
A Year With Frog and Toad Oct. 14-17, times vary
99 Monmouth St., Red Bank 732-842-9000thebasie.org
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202262 Explore
Live on Stage Oct. 6 at 6 pm
COUNT BASIE CENTER FOR THE ARTS
Piff the Magic Dragon & Puddles Pity Party
Oct. 14, 8 pm
Masters of Illusion
As part of the Young Audience Series, the kids will learn about friendship between Frog and Toad who travel on their adventures. $5–$15 per person.
Oct. 2, 7 pm
Peppa Pig’s Adventure
Haunted Illusions Starring David Caserta
about an adventure“outdoor”withPeppa and her friends as they take an exciting camping trip. The show will be full of singing, dancing, games and surprises. $29.50–$79.50 per person.
By Jennifer Amato
Master illusionist David Caserta treats you to mind-blowing magic by levitating, disappearing and reappearing right before your eyes. Witness neverbefore-seen illusions created just for this show! $29–$44 per person.
Kids will try to solve Blue’s Clues to find out what Josh needs to make a show. Enjoy song and dance, and MPAC
Oct. 30, 3 pm
Your kids will be excited
CENTENARY STAGE COMPANY
Piff the Magic Dragon is accompanied by his sidekick Mr. Piffles, the world’s only magic performing chihuahua, and Puddles Pity Party, the sad, giant clown who sings. $29–$59 per person.
BERGEN PERFORMING ARTS CENTER
Oct. 15, 1 pm and 5 pm
You’ll see illusions, levitating $29–$99dancerssleightescapes,appearancesperformers,andvanishes,comedymagic,ofhandandbeautifulatthismagicshow.perperson.
30 N. Van Brunt St., 201-227-1030bergenpac.orgEnglewood
Little Theatre 400 Jefferson St., 908-979-0900centenarystageco.orgHackettstown
Baby Shark Live! The Christmas Show Nov. 6, 1 pm and 5 pm
M c CARTER THEATRE CENTER
The “queen of kids’ music” returns to her hometown for a performance of her greatest hits. $15 per person.
have fun making a rainbow with Magenta and a music video with Rainbow Puppy. $29.50–$59.50 per person.
This show designed especially for kids brings the classic Hans Christian Andersen fable to life. $12–$15 per person.
15 Livingston Ave. New stnj.org,Brunswick732-246-7469
The Emperor’s New Clothes
Oct. 15, 1 pm and 4 pm
Masters of Illusion Oct. 8, 7:30 pm
Blue’s Clues & You!
36 Crawfords Corner Rd. 732-946-0427holmdeltheatrecompany.orgHolmdel
Jeff Boyer’s Big Bubble Bonanza
HOLMDEL COMPANYTHEATRE
Clue Sept. 23, 24 and 30, 8 pm Oct. 1, 7 and 8, 8 pm Sept. 25 and Oct. 2, 3 pm
Like the board game, this performance of “Clue” is a “comedy whodunit.” Was it Mrs. Peacock caught in the drawing room with the candlestick? $22–$25 per person.
As seen on Nick Jr., Hot Peas ‘n Butter mixes traditional Latin music, Afro-Caribbean rhythms, jazz and more. $10 –$25 per person.
1 College Dr., Toms River 732-255-0500grunincenter.org
Live on Stage Oct. 9, 2 pm
14 Alvin Pl., Upper, 973-744-9752studioplayhouse.orgMontclair
Laurie Berkner puts on another show with her band. $30–$40 per person.
NEW PERFORMINGJERSEY ARTS CENTER
Crowns—A Musical
Laurie Berkner Solo! A “Greatest Hits” SensoryFriendly Performance Oct. 8, 11am
Kids will be singing “Baby Shark,” “Five Little Monkeys,” “Wheels on the Bus” and “Monkey Banana Dance” long after the show ends, along with holiday classics like “Jingle Bells” and more. $39–$59 per person.
1200 Old Trenton Rd. West 609-570-3333kelsey.mccc.eduWindsor
Disney Junior Live on Tour: Costume Palooza!
Oct. 28–Nov. 6, times vary
STATE THEATRE NEW JERSEY
Peppa Pig’s Adventure Oct. 16, 1 pm and 5 pm
whole family. $12 per child, $15 per adult.
Nov. 5, 1 pm
91 University Pl. Princeton 609-258-2787mccarter.org
Disney Junior Live on Tour: Costume Palooza Oct. 29, 12 pm and 4 pm
Hot Peas ‘N Butter Oct. 23, 3pm
Masters of Illusion Oct. 13, 7:30 pm
The Wolves Sept. 17–Oct. 16, times vary Meet nine young women from a competitive high school soccer team who experience life, love and loss on and off the field. Parental discretion is advised for strong language and themes; recommended for 12 and older. $35–$60 per person.
Oct. 8, 3 pm
JAY AND LINDA GRUNIN CENTER FOR THE ARTS
MAYO PERFORMING ARTS CENTER
100 South mayoarts.orgMorristownSt. 973-539-8008
Get ready to sing, dance and travel around the world on the “Back to the Land Tour!”
Mickey, Minnie and their pals are getting ready to throw a huge costume party but mysterious green rain, wind and smoke interrupt the fun. Keep your kids guessing while Spidey and his Amazing Friends try to save the Costume Palooza. $25–$59 per person.
STUDIO PLAYERS
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY CENTERTHEATREMCCARTER 63 Explore
1 Center St., Newark 888-466-5722njpac.org,
Oct. 30, 12 pm and 4 pm
Your teen will be inspired by Yolanda, a 17-year-old who is exploring her own Black history and identity. She moves down South to live with her aunt after her brother is killed in Brooklyn. Watch as the characters use their hats to tell the story in this musical performance.
Your kids won’t believe their eyes when they see bubble rainbows with people inside and audience members making volcano bubbles. Jeff Boyer hosts a sensory-friendly bubble extravaganza for the
KELSEY THEATRE AT MERCER COMMUNITYCOUNTYCOLLEGE
Fridays / Saturdays • Sept. 23 - Oct. 22
Throughout October The PumpkinGreatTrain
MARTINEDOUCET©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM:/RESORTCAMBELBACK/EXCURSIONSRAILROADRIVERDELAWARE/FARMHILLHEAVENLEFT:TOPFROMCLOCKWISE
Corn Maze and Harvest Moon Hayride
inScarecrowstheVillage
Head out for some apple picking, get lost in a corn maze or hop aboard a fall train ride. 17 – Nov. 6
Visit the borough’s downtown for many events that celebrate the fall season: a movie night, haunted hayride, Monster Mash and Jack-o-Lantern Contest, a haunted house tour and a costume parade to cap off the season. Visit downtownfreehold.com for the full lineup.
Throughout October
Pumpkin picking at Donaldson Farms in Hackettstown is a long-standing tradition. While visiting you can also pick Indian corn or gourds, take a hayride to the pumpkin field and apple orchard or grab a wheelbarrow and walk to the fields. Learn more at donaldsonfarms.net
Throughout October
Nighttime AdventuresWeekend
Take the Great Pumpkin Train down to the old Snyder Farm. Families can play the Monster Mystery Game and all kids get to pick a free pumpkin. Head to 877trainride. com to book your trip.
Sept. 24 – Oct. 31
On Friday and Saturday nights you can enjoy special Nighttime Weekend Adventures at Camelback Resort. Take your pick from the Climbing Wall, Euro Bungee, Mountain Coaster, Sunbowl Tubing and the 1,000-Foot Zipline. The most thrilling is the Mountain Coaster, which gets decorated for spooky season. Head to camelbackresort.com to learn more.
Head to Heaven Hill Farm for a hayride, corn maze, pedal carts, farm animals and more than 20 activities to keep everyone on the go! New for 2022 is The Canine Stars Stunt Dog Show, as seen on Nickelodeon. Go heavenhillfarm.comto for the full schedule.
Every year, families move through the giant themed corn maze at Alstede Farms while learning some fun facts. The Harvest Moon Hayride lets you explore the maze by flashlight at night. Make sure to check out the farm market and farm animals while you’re visiting. Go to alstedefarms.com for ticket info.
Sept.
PYO Pumpkins
SpooktacularFreehold
One hundred handmade scarecrows will line the paths of Peddler’s Village in New Hope, PA, every day in October. You can vote on your favorite ones through Oct. 10. Shops will be open late. the-villagepeddlersvillage.com/event/scarecrows-in-Visitformoreinfo.
FestivalPumpkinGreat
64 NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 2022 OCTOBER
Fridays / Saturdays • Sept. 30 – Oct. 31
Oct. 5
For more events near you or to add your own, go to njfamily.com/calendar
Join Lorrimer Sanctuary staff for a fun family program about apple cider. Learn about apple trees, use an oldfashioned cider press, taste fresh local cider and make an apple stamp craft, too. Visit njaudubon.org to register.
Lima FestivalBean
Oct. 15
Fall Fling Arts & Crafts Show
CideringApple
Oct. 1 - 2
Fall Craft & Live Music Festival
Bask in the beautiful grounds of Holland Ridge Farms, filled with sunflowers and zinnias, while taking advantage of what this fall fest has to offer including crafters, live music, food, farm animals and PYO flowers. Tickets at shop. hollandridgefarms.com.
Don’tforget! Oct. 23
Oct. 8
Witches Day Out
All events are
subject to cancellation so call ahead before heading out. KANAWA_STUDIO©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM:/MAYCAPEWEST/VIGNJEVICDOBRILA©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM:/ILLUSTRATORANDPHOTOGRAPHER©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM:TOP:FROM Go fornjfamily.com/applestothebestPYOapplespotsinNJ!
Ocean Grove is known for its massive craft fairs and flea markets, and this fall show is no exception! There will be lots of great live music, food, vendors and gorgeous artwork. Go to oceangrovenj. com/events for a full list of happenings.
OCTOBER 2022 | NEW JERSEY FAMILY 65
Get excited for some magical shopping and scary good deals! Dress in costume to enter to win prizes for best overall witch, best shoes, best hat and best junior witch. Anyone wearing a witch’s hat will be treated to discounts —that’s no trick! Visit historicsmithville. com for details.
West Cape May will celebrate its farming heritage where the legume takes center stage. There will be lima bean-centric food, crafts and vendors. Visit westcapemay.us for details.
NJFAMILY.COM | OCTOBER 202266
Hackettstown hosts a family-friendly event, with activities food and more Sept. 24 and 25. Check out hackettstownbid.com for the full schedule. Readington Hop Farm is hosting its first Oktoberfest on Oct. 1 and 2! Aside from adults sampling beer from Readington Brewery, there will be a costume contest for the best German outfit. Head to readingtonbrewery.com for details. Also on Oct. 1 and 2, Historic Smithville’s famous Oktoberfest has more than 100 juried crafters, an international food court, music, kids’ activities, non-profit organizations and more. See historicsmithville.com for more details. The main attraction in Ridgewood’s Oct. 8 and 9 event is a tractor-drawn hayride that takes its passengers for a ride up to The Heights. Pumpkin painting, a scarecrow making contest, a tent of vendors, toss games, sidewalk chalking, ice cream, and music round out the weekend. Visit ridgewoodguild.com for details. The Asbury Festhalle & Biergarten’s 7th annual Oktoberfest kicks off Columbus Day Weekend. Come by for live music, a Munich-style tent on the roof top and other events. Check out asburybiergarten. com/public-events for the musical lineup. Each year Morey’s Piers’ Oktoberfest grows bigger and better, with live music, activities for the little squirts, rides, and of course, Bier on the Pier. In addition to the regular menu, Jumbo’s Grub and Pub will feature a special themed selection of German food. Stop by Fridays through Sundays through Oct. 9. Visit moreyspiers.com/event/ oktoberfest for each weekend’s schedule of events.
OCTOBER Planner Oktoberfest is Here! ROMRODINKA/©ISTOCKPHOTO.COM Assessment & Treatment for Speech, Language and Orofacial Myofunctional Disorders in Children and Adults Sharon Ratiner MA CCC-SLP, COM NJ License # 41YS00057000 344 Main Street, Suite A, sprspeech@yahoo.comMetuchen ratinerspeechtherapy.com • 848-200-7276 Serving the community over 20 years RATINER SPEECH AND THERAPYLANGUAGESERVICES Building Bridges to Success 811 Washington Rd. Ste. 2A, Parlin, 732-698-7549NJ gabbingtogether.com Gabbing Together Speech and Language Services Evaluation and Treatment for Speech, Language and Feeding DisordersMicheleDicksonM.S.,CCC-SLP,CBC NJ #41YS00584500License
™ Welcome to Our Neighborhood (WTON) invites you to explore and support the many local businesses in your community. Join Our Team We are recruiting Community Representatives. Turn your community connections into a business. Learn more about our organization, visit: wtonnj.com GET CONNECTED WITH YOUR COMMUNITY Proud to be a distribution partner for NJ Family magazines.
NJPAC’s original holiday mashup remixes Tchaikovsky’s ballet with supercharged hip hop dance. the hip hop
dec 30 – 31
sleepingbeauty
Snow Waltz Tour
cirque dreams holidaze nutcracker
Year of the Black Water Rabbit
Celebrate the holidays with this popular and electrifying spectacular!
stage
nai-nidancechencompany
Jan 21 & 22 @ 2PM
The State Ballet Theatre of Ukraine Sun, Jan 15 @ 6PM
The State Ballet Theatre of Ukraine performs Sleeping Beauty, Tchaikovsky’s fairytale masterpiece.
Sat, Feb 4 @ 2PM
dance series
@NJPAC
or more call
Dec 7 @ 8PM
Come aboard for a winter joyride with pop violinist Lindsey Stirling and her new Christmas album, Snow Waltz
. lindseystirling
Gather ‘round, wizards and muggles, for the epic conclusion of the Harry Potter film concert series with NJ Symphony!
Groups of 9 973.353.7561
Dec 26 @ 7PM
One Center Street, Newark, NJ
• 1.888.MY.NJPAC • njpac.org
Bring the whole family to welcome the Year of the Black Water Rabbit with the spectacular Nai-Ni Chen Dance Company.
with special guest MC Kurtis Blow Sat, Dec 17 @ 2 & 7:30PM
