Mendo Lake Family Life November 2019

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November 2019

Practice Gratitude Ways to give thanks

Health Coverage ACA enrollment

Tech in Schools A new future

Foster A mom’s story Love

Little Mouths are a Big Deal Dentistry kids love and parents trust.

Call for your appointment today!

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Pediatrics and Family Practice inspired to keep your entire family healthy this flu season.

It’s no secret that the flu season can hit children and our elderly community members the hardest.

Getting flu vaccines for the entire family can protect the ones you love the most. Our expert team of providers are ready to serve your family this winter. We are accepting new and existing patients for sick visits, flu shots and other health concerns.

Find us close to home 850 Sequoia Circle, Fort Bragg

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To schedule a flu vaccine or sick visit for your family call 833-AH-Wellness (833-249-3556)

November 2019

Every Issue 6

Dear Reader

7

Cooking with Kids Smoothie with Style

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12 Features 10 Technology in Education The new future of education.

12 The Health Insurance Shuffle

Bits and Pieces Ye Olde Christmas Bach on Us A Healthy Turkey Day Fashion Forward Fruits of the Earth Carb Lovers Unite!

A Boy’s Christmas Quest

22 Calendar of Events Fun with Fungi

30 Humor Break How Loud Are They Whining?

Take advantage of the ACA enrollment period.

14 Go for Gratitude

8

Help kids to give back to their communities.

16 Just Add Love Peek into the heart of a foster mom.

18 Manners Magic Teach age-appropriate ways to be courteous.

20 ‘Tis the Season to Save Tips for staying in your budget.

4 MendoLakeFamilyLife

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November 2019 www.mendolakefamilylife.com

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UKIAH UNIFIED SCHOOL DISTRICT LEARN • INSPIRE • CREATE • GROW • COMMUNICATE • COLLABORATE • DEVELOP • INNOVATE

g Ar t s n i m r o rf e P al & u s i V 2 1 K STEM • GREAT THINGS

ARE HAPPENING AT UKIAH UNIFIED

Art & Music Programs • Outdoor Education Career Education, Honors & AP Courses ENROLLING NOW! From Performing Arts classes with SPACE, to over 30 Career courses, we’re engaging our youth and helping them One-to-One Chromebooks create their future! in 3rd-12th Grade

511 S. Orchard Ave. • 707-472-5000 • www.uusd.net

Dear Reader

T

Sharon Gowan Publisher/Editor Sharon@family-life.us

hanksgiving is almost upon us, and with it, an opportunity to count our blessings. Our readers are definitely one of ours. What are yours?

Family is on the

gratitude list of many folks. And for those children who don’t have one, foster parents offer a safety net until a forever home is found. As Deirdre Littlefield learned, it’s not just the kids who benefit. Read about her foster parenting journey in “Just Add Love” (page 16).

Along with familial love, health is one of those “biggies” for which many are grateful. Thanks to the Affordable Care Act (ACA), millions have access to health care, and as a result, well-being. If you have been thinking about enrolling, now is the time. The

new enrollment period runs November 1–December 15. Turn to “The Health Insurance Shuffle” (page 12) for tips on finding the best plan for your family.

Now back to that question: What are your blessings? For inspiration to focus on the positive, read “Go with Gratitude” (page 14). You might even end up feeling like there’s a little something you can do to give back.

Sometimes, however, life is so challenging we need to just let ourselves receive. For those who, as I write, are suffering displacement and/or the loss of their homes due to the Kincade Fire, now is one of those times. We hope you find strength in the support of family, friends, and community.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Office Manager Patricia Ramos patty@family-life.us

Business Marketing Renee Nutcher renee@family-life.us Warren Kaufman warren@family-life.us

Features Editor Melissa Chianta melissa@family-life.us

Production Manager Donna Bogener production@family-life.us

Web and Social Media Natalie Bruzon natalie@family-life.us

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KEEP YOUR KIDS IN SCHOOL. 6 MendoLakeFamilyLife

Being absent just 2-3 days a month in the first few years of school makes it really hard to master reading.

If your kids don’t read at grade level by third grade, their chances of graduating from high school plummet.

uusd.net

Contributing Writers Sandra Gordon Michelle Hutchins Malia Jacobson Deirdre Littlefield Kerrie McLoughlin Pam Moore Karen Nochimowski Kathryn Streeter

Billing Jan Wasson-Smith

Publishing Office P.O. Box 351 Philo, CA 95466 (707) 586-9562

attendanceworks.org November 2019 www.mendolakefamilylife.com

Cooking with Kids

Smoothie with Style A New Twist on a Traditional Snack

By Momma Chef

M

y kids’ snacking habits tend to occur in waves. They will fall in love with something and then request it—please, please, please, Mom!—for every single snack, every single day.

And then, without much warning, my little connoisseurs will turn their backs on their snacking obsession, usually after I’ve gone to the local warehouse grocery store and stocked up on the aforementioned Best Snack Ever.

Fortunately, one snack that never grows old at our house is the traditional sliced apples and peanut butter. The crisp and cool tartness of an apple pairs perfectly with the sweet creaminess of peanut butter.

It’s a simple snack my older kids can prepare at home, and it’s easy for us to take on the road. (In fact, I’m pretty sure I have a spare apple slicer and a jar of peanut butter in the back of my car right now.)

You’d think I would be satisfied with this treat: fruit plus peanut butter equals lots of protein, fiber, and deliciousness. And yet, you know that my Momma-Chef brain is always stirring up new takes on old favorites.

Using PB and apples as my inspiration, last fall I created this good-to-the-last-drop Candied Apple www.mendolakefamilylife.com

Candied Apple Peanut Butter Smoothie Ingredients • ½ cup milk • ½ cup vanilla ice cream • ¼ cup peanut butter • one green apple, sliced • caramel syrup or cinnamon (optional) Serves: 1 large cup

Peanut Butter Smoothie. My own kids love it as a special treat, especially when they have the chance to drizzle the caramel on it themselves. I was a kitchen superhero when I whipped up a batch for my son’s friend. A notoriously picky eater, he had come home with us after a soccer game.

Remembering that he previously had rebuffed sliced apples and peanut butter, I offered to make him this special smoothie. I wasn’t surprised when, after draining the first glass

November 2019

Instructions 1. Pour in order into a blender: milk, ice cream, peanut butter, and sliced apple.

2. Blend on medium speed for 2 minutes.

3. Pour into your favorite cup.

4. Drizzle with caramel or sprinkle cinnamon. in record time, he shyly asked for another serving.

With peanut butter, milk, and apples— and the indulgence of a little ice cream—this smoothie delivers the perfect combination of protein, fiber, and fun that my growing athletic kids need. So, if you’re looking for something that’s both yummy and nutritious, grab your blender and try this recipe.

Karen Nochimowski, the mom behind mommachef.com a blog featuring the quick, easy

MendoLakeFamilyLife 7

Bits & Pieces

Ye Olde Christmas

F

ans want to be in photos with their favorite celebrities. And Santa is happy to oblige at the Dickens’ Christmas Market, where the man of the hour will be listening to the wish lists and posing for photos.

Besides visits with Father Christmas, the annual event will feature local vendors, carolers, a sledding hill, a skating rink, and children’s activities. The celebration will be held in downtown Lakeport on November 30, 11 a.m.–6 p.m., with a pet parade beginning at noon, and the town’s Christmas tree lighting at 5:30 p.m.

Costumes are encouraged. For more information, go to facebook.com/events/879076122448225. ¶

Bach on Us

R

aising a family in Mendocino and Lake Counties can be expensive. And cultural activities might not even make it into a budget.

So the Lake County Symphony Orchestra is letting the public see dress rehearsals for just $5, or, for kids younger than 18, free.

The November 17 performance will feature violinist Nathan Crozier playing the Bach Violin Concerto in E Major. The program will also include Haydn’s “Drum Roll” symphony, the Jolly Robbers Overture, and Strauss’ Radetzky March. And the symphony’s youth orchestra will get a chance to play, too. The dress rehearsal will be held at 11 a.m. and the actual performance at 2 p.m. Tickets for the latter are $25–$30 and may be purchased at soperreesetheatre.com. ¶

Nathan Crozier

A Healthy Turkey Day

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hanksgiving’s feasting can be challenging for anyone trying to stick to any kind of diet. So the staff of Adventist Health Ukiah Valley will be offering a free talk, Healthy Holiday Sides, that will include tips and recipes for turning the traditional meal into a healthy one. The event will be held on November 12, noon–1 p.m., at the conference room at Adventist Health in Ukiah. For more information, email u.n.f.outreach@gmail.com. ¶

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November 2019 www.mendolakefamilylife.com

Fashion Forward

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hy pay $50 for a new blouse when you get something comparable for $10 at a consignment store? Such is the philosophy of thrifty folk everywhere. And to prove their point—and raise money for breast cancer patients—some of them will be showing off their recycled duds at the ReRunway Secondhand Fashion Show. Besides a fashion show, the Sutter Health fundraiser also promises dinner, wine, and other entertainment. The event will be held on November 8, 6–9 p.m., at the Lake County Fairgrounds in Lakeport. Tickets are $45; register online at sutterhealth.org/rerunway. ¶

ReRunway Secondh and Fashion Show

Fruits of the Earth

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all is a time of celebrating abundant harvest. And the Mendocino County Farm Bureau will be doing just that with a Harvest Farm-to-Table Brunch that highlights locally grown products. The meal will be held on November 3, 10 a.m.–1 p.m., at Barra of Mendocino in Redwood Valley.

Mimosas will be available throughout the day. Tickets are $50 and available at tinyurl.com/y4o8hkq2 or at the door. A raffle will benefit the bureau’s Water Education and Outreach Fund. For details, go to mendofb.org. ¶

A Boy’s Christmas Quest

I Carb Lovers Unite!

E

ating a steaming plate of pasta may be a dietary sin in a paelo’s world. But there’s still a place for carb lovers at the Clearlake Youth Center’s Spaghetti Dinner fundraiser. Noodles and sauce will be served up on November 16, 6–8 p.m., at the center in Clearlake. Tickets are $20 each or two for $30. For more information, call 350-0315 and see facebook.com/ events/707043103053956. ¶

www.mendolakefamilylife.com

t’s Depression-era Indiana and a 9-year-old boy longs to find a certain present under the Christmas tree. Such is the beginning of the 1983 film A Christmas Story, a holiday classic since its release. Based on a book by Jean Shepherd, the nostalgic comedy was, in 2000, turned into a play, which the Ukiah Players Theatre in Ukiah will be bringing to its stage November 21–December 8.

Shows will be held Thursdays through Saturdays (except November 23 and 28) at 7 p.m. and Sundays at 2 p.m. Tickets are available at ukiahplayerstheatre.org. ¶

November 2019

MendoLakeFamilyLife 9

sometimes browsing around to see what else was available. As a result, students had to develop problem-solving and social skills to gather the information and then critical-thinking skills to synthesize

Technology in Education Preparing Students for the Future

By Michelle Hutchins, Mendocino County Superintendent of Schools

D

uring the 1900s, people’s livelihoods moved away from agriculture into jobs based on the industrial revolution, then from a products-based economy to a services-based economy. In the 21st century, we’re transitioning from a services-based economy to an economy that understands and uses information to solve problems on an enterprise scale.

What does this mean for our schools? It means that rather than asking students to memorize facts they could find quickly in a Google search, we need to teach them to use the technology at hand to solve problems and to think critically so that whatever technology is developed, they can figure out how to embrace it.

Many schools have already begun this transition and are incorporating tools like Chromebooks into 10 MendoLakeFamilyLife

daily lessons. Because many of us educators grew up before the computer revolution, it can be difficult to re-imagine how to prepare today’s students for the future.

Thirty years ago, when we asked students to write a research paper, it required a trip to the library, learning to use a card catalog, possibly talking to a librarian, navigating through the stacks to find the desired books and then

To inspire more technology-based problem solving, MCOE has brought an Escape Bus to visit many of our schools. the information. In our current world, if students have access to the Internet and a device, they can access all the information they need in moments.

The problem is, many students have difficulty filtering misleading information and struggle with thinking critically about how social media and other online venues are manipulating them. We are now in a position to help students navigate a world that many of us are not fluent in ourselves.

In response, forward-thinking teachers have begun to restructure learning, but it’s hard to shift decades’ worth of tradition. In California, new educational standards were adopted in recent years. They are a step in the right direction, but they are only standards—not curriculum.

Developing engaging curriculum is where the rubber hits the road.

At the Mendocino County Office of Education (MCOE), we’ve been working with school districts

November 2019 www.mendolakefamilylife.com

Charles M. Schulz Sonoma County Airport to support them in their desire to move further and faster into technology-based learning. Last month, we supported a pilot project at one school district where students were taught to gather information, distill and analyze it, formulate solutions to the problems they identified, and present those solutions to garner broad public support, all while using available technology.

activities, racism, bullying, and low college-going rates. These were real problems at their school, not made-up problems out of a textbook.

The students who participated were identified not because they were leaders among their peers, but because they represented a cross section of regular students.

The students used a variety of technology tools and found some truly creative solutions. As members of their target audience, they had a strong grasp on the types of messages and activities their peers would respond to. With some guidance, they learned how to put together technology-aided presentations to convince the adults www.mendolakefamilylife.com

 Seattle (SEA)  Portland (PDX)  Los Angeles (LAX)  Orange County (SNA)  San Diego (SAN)  Phoenix (PHX)  Dallas (DFW)  San Francisco (SFO)  Denver (DEN)  Minneapolis (MSP)  Las Vegas (LAS)

We are now in a position to help students navigate a world that many of us are not fluent in ourselves. practical and achievable fundraising that they, the students, would be responsible for.

To inspire more technology-based problem solving, MCOE has brought an Escape Bus to visit many of our schools. Its tour began in October and will end on November 5 at the MCOE office. Students have had to solve age-appropriate puzzles using technology to escape the bus.

Teachers have also given it a try. To bring the bus to Mendocino County, we partnered with iSchool Initiative, a company led by a young, dynamic CEO who says that his introduction to online multi-player gaming as an adolescent helped him hone his problem-solving and business skills, which he employs daily as an adult.

It’s hard when growth is exponential rather than linear, but that is how technology is growing and we need to do what we can to anticipate and expand the skills our students will need to be successful in a dynamic and unpredictable future. ¶ Michelle Hutchins is the Mendocino County Superintendent of Schools.

November 2019

TS

Developing engaging curriculum is where the rubber hits the road.

For example, they came up with ideas to increase interest in college.

They developed recommendations, estimated budgets, and included

Fly local & enjoy nonstop flights!

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The students learned to ask probing questions to get to the root of the problems they were trying to solve: low student engagement/ lack of school spirit, lack of adequate facilities for certain

in the room that their ideas had merit.

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specialist—a certified application counselor who can answer questions and help you enroll in California’s insurance exchange program.

Or, even better, get a consultation with a certified insurance broker; this service is also accessible through the “find help” option.

An insurance broker is a licensed and certified professional who has gone through federal training to understand the ACA and the

The Health Insurance Shuffle Choose the Best ACA Plan for Your Family

By Sandra Gordon

S

hould you change your health insurance plan? Which plan offers the best deal? Now’s the time to find out.

Open enrollment, the once-a-year period when the federal government, thanks to the Affordable Care Act (ACA), allows consumers to choose a health insurance plan or select a new one, begins this year on November 1 and runs through December 15. Health-care coverage applied for during this time will start January 1, 2020.

The ACA features insurance marketplaces or “exchanges” in every state. (Go to Covered California at coveredca.com to find the California 12 MendoLakeFamilyLife

marketplace.) These online marketplaces are where consumers can go to compare and buy individual health insurance plans.

The following tips can help simplify the process of choosing a plan.

Consult experts. Shopping for health insurance, even using the exchanges, can be confusing. Don’t go it alone. If you have a question about which health plan to choose and what the lingo means, visit healthcare. gov and click on “find help.” You’ll be directed to an enrollment health

Shopping for health insurance can be confusing. Don’t go it alone. financial implications of the various choices. A broker can help you choose the best plan and offer an opinion. Brokers receive a commission from insurance companies for their services, which are free to consumers. “There’s no discount by skipping a broker, so you might as well take advantage of their expertise,” says Katherine Woodfield, author of Don’t Buy THAT Health Insurance: Become an Educated Health Care Consumer (Dog Ear Publishing, 2012).

Focus on health plans with the highest deductible. The ACA offers four plan types. Bronze, which has the lowest monthly premium, features insurance coverage for 60 percent of health-care costs, with 40 percent paid by consumers. It is followed

by Silver 70/30 Gold (80/20), and Platinum (90/10). The latter has the highest monthly premium.

November 2019 www.mendolakefamilylife.com

Each type offers standard health benefits. They include preventive and wellness visits, including chronic disease management, and maternity and newborn care; mental and behavioral health treatment; services and devices to help people with injuries, disabilities, or chronic conditions; lab tests; pediatric care; prescription drugs; and outpatient care. Higher premiums do not include more benefits.

Woodfield recommends choosing a health plan with the lowest premium, i.e. one in the Bronze category. Her motto is “Keep fixed expenses low. In other words, pay the lowest premium possible, so you’ll have the least amount of money automatically going

If you’re not eligible for an HSA, a personal savings account designated for medical expenses will do. out of your pocket every month. When you pay the lowest monthly premium possible, you’ll pay less overall in medical care expenses.”

Skeptical? Do the math. Let’s say you call your doctor and pharmacist to get the full retail cost of each of your doctor’s visits, blood tests, and medications. (Woodfield advocates actually doing this.) If your total medical costs for the year add up to $6,000, on the (60/40) Bronze plan, you’ll have to pay 40 percent of those costs, or $2,400 and your premium, at say, $100 per month, will be $1,200 annually, for a total of $3,600. If you’re on the (70/30) Silver plan, with a $200 monthly premium, you’ll pay www.mendolakefamilylife.com

$1,800 in medical costs and $2,400 in premiums, for a total annual cost of $4,200, and so on. Get the idea?

Monthly health insurance premiums never go away, but medical service costs do. The maximum out-of-pocket limit for an ACA Marketplace plan for 2020 is $8,200 for an individual plan and $16,400 for a family. The Bronze plan will allow you to meet your deductible faster.

Choose a plan that includes your providers. If your doctor isn’t listed as a provider for a health plan you’re considering, call the doctor’s office to see if she or he will be signing up with the plan, Woodfield says.

Providers can change the plans they participate in, and they often do. But if your doctors don’t accept the health insurance plan you’re considering, pick a different plan or change doctors.

Sign up for a Health Savings Account. To manage health-care costs, Woodfield also suggests enrolling in a health savings account (HSA), which is a fund that may only be used for qualified medical expenses. Then, pay for healthcare that isn’t covered as you go, just like you do for groceries or gas. The IRS deems what’s an acceptable medical expense for an HSA, and its list includes more services than what a health insurance company will cover.

Visit healthcare.gov/glossary/ health-savings-account-hsa/ for more information. If you’re not eligible for an HSA, a personal savings account designated for medical expenses will do. ¶ Sandra Gordon is an award-winning freelance writer.

November 2019

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specific when communicating what each person brings to their lives.

For instance, “I’m thankful for you because you tell funny jokes and make me laugh.”

• On Thanksgiving Day, call people whose presence you miss around the

“This a wonderful day.

I’ve never seen this one before.”—Maya Angelou

Go for Gratitude 10 Ways to Foster a Charitable Spirit

By Kathryn Streeter

P

eople who practice gratitude are happier. That’s what the research says, according to the Harvard Health Publishing article, “Giving Thanks Can Make You Happier”: “Gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships.” Gratitude is a thankful outlook on life, and its very expression tends to be action-oriented.

Here are 10 ways to help foster a spirit of gratitude in your children.

• At the beginning of November, present your children with “Thanksgiving notebooks,” which they can use to daily record what they’re thankful for.

• For each letter of their names, have your children think of a word that 14 MendoLakeFamilyLife

expresses something that they are thankful for. (Example: Sam: S for soccer; A for animals; M for mom.)

Write the words down on long, narrow strips of paper that later will be hung on the refrigerator to create a Thanksgiving display.

• Have your kids write letters expressing thanks to family members and close friends. Tell them to be

dinner table. Hand the phone to your children and let them put in their own words why they miss the person on the other end of the phone.

• Weather conditions can be unpleasant in November. If it’s grim and kids are complaining, counter their negativity with positivity. For example, ask them to talk about what’s good about rain and gray skies. Extend this exercise to other common sources of grumbling.

• Help your children identify one child and one teacher at school who could use a boost of encouragement. Have your child create Thanksgiving cards that precisely explain why they’re thankful to have this person in their lives. Especially urge kids to illustrate the card’s message, to add a personal touch.

• Read books about thankfulness, such as Last Stop on Market Street (Putnam’s Sons, 2015), Crenshaw (Square Fish, 2017), and I Am Malala (Little, Brown & Co., 2016). Refugee (Scholastic, 2017) and Homeroom Diaries (Arrow, 2014) are good selections for tweens/teens.

• Watch movies filled with messages of gratitude, such as A Charlie Brown

November 2019 www.mendolakefamilylife.com

GIVE US A SHOUT!

Thanksgiving (1973), Up (2009), and Veggie Tales’ episode “Madame Blueberry” (2006). For older kids, consider Lion (2016) and Life Is Beautiful (1998).

We want to know what you think.

• What did you like in this issue?

• What do you want to see more or less of?

• Know a teacher, coach, or special person who makes local family life better?

• Know of an upcoming event or fun family outing?

• Want to write stories or recipes, or blog for Family Life?

• Memorize a quote about gratitude that your child can recite on

e-mail melissa@family-life.us

Counter negativity with positivity.

Thanksgiving around the dinner table.

Let them surf sites like Brainy Quotes or Inc.com to pick out their perfect quote to memorize, such as these: • Maya Angelou: “This a wonderful day. I’ve never seen this one before.”

• Aesop: “Gratitude is the sign of noble souls.”

• A. A. Milne: “Piglet noticed that even though he had a Very Small Heart, it could hold a rather large amount of Gratitude.”

• Cicero: “Gratitude is not only the greatest of all virtues, but the parent of all the others.”

• Oprah Winfrey: “Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.”

• Practice kindness. Make November your family’s month to serve low-income residents in your area.

When your kids are serving meals at a soup kitchen or reading to kids at a shelter for women and children, they’ll more readily recognize the gifts in their own lives. ¶ Find Kathryn Streeter on Twitter @ streeterkathryn.

www.mendolakefamilylife.com

Presented by The Lakeport Main Street Association November 2019

MendoLakeFamilyLife 15

4 years old and, wearing just a hospital johnny, appeared almost as scared as I was. He slept well that first night.

The next day, proudly wearing his dreads, this poor little guy sat bravely amongst our typical Irish Catholic family. He slowly came out of his shell as he told us his

Just Add Love The Evolution of a Foster Parent

By Deirdre Littlefield

I

had wanted to adopt a child from foster care since I was a little girl. Ever since I saw the movie Annie, I was hooked on the idea. I wondered how it was possible that there were children nobody wants, children without a family.

It took many years for me to follow my instincts and start the process.

It was such a scary idea to bring a child I’d never met into our home. I wouldn’t know their genetics, their background, or family history. I did know that there are hundreds of thousands of kids in the United States who live in foster care. I also knew that I had the skills to parent, and the capacity to love, any child.

Believing this, I finally jumped in.

16 MendoLakeFamilyLife

Every child needs and deserves a family.

There are a few different ways one can parent a child in foster care.

We knew our long-term goal was to adopt but decided to do emergency care while we waited to go through the adoption process. Our first placement arrived the night before Thanksgiving in 2011. He was

I knew that I had the skills to parent, and the capacity to love, any child. likes and dislikes. My kids and their cousins included this young boy in their games, treating him as if they had known him forever. It began to really sink in: foster children are exactly like my children, except a scary adjective—foster—follows them wherever they go.

After that first boy, we had many other kids—from the mischievous toddler twins to the 3-year-old boy who clearly suffered from neglect— and they were all hard to forget. We parented lovely tween girls who, when they first arrived, immediately tried to take care of my little one because that was all they knew how to do—to offer, instead of receive, nurturing. We had one 10-year-old boy who put on rollerblades for the first time while staying with us.

He was such a natural and skated well immediately. It doesn’t seem right to think that he never had the opportunity to be part of a team

November 2019 www.mendolakefamilylife.com

mendo lake and reap all of the lifelong benefits that such an experience can bring.

My all-time favorite was an athletic, sassy, and capable 10-year-old girl. She could rule the world if somebody would just give her a chance, if she just had a permanent family.

magazine • web • email

#1 local resource for local families

LOCAL for 25 years

Foster children are exactly like my children, except a scary adjective— foster —follows them wherever they go.

One special child we adopted. He was four pounds when he came to us, directly from the hospital, in late 2012. All he needed was our love, stability, and a home to thrive in. This little guy has grown into the funniest, most lovable human being you can imagine.

Every child needs and deserves a family, and having one means that when they grow up they will be more likely to positively contribute to society. It is in all of our best interests to offer what we can. There are so many ways to enrich the life of a child in foster care and, in so doing, leave a lifelong imprint on this world. If we can do it, anybody can. ¶ Deirdre Littlefield is a mother to three children, two biological sons, ages 26 and 13, and one adopted son, age 7. She works for a nonprofit that advocates for children and “loves all things domestic.”

www.mendolakefamilylife.com

November 2019

MendoLakeFamilyLife 17

teaching children manners? “You can’t start them too young,” she notes.

“There is no certain age when the magic begins.”

That means establishing family behavior norms early on. If you don’t want your children to run indoors, traipse through airplane rows, or jump on furniture, correct these behaviors in toddlerhood with a firm, gentle reminder: “That is not how we act in this family. It doesn’t matter what other children do.” Toddlers

Manners Magic Holiday Etiquette for Tots to Teens

By Malia Jacobson

A

lready dreading the thought of taking your rambunctious brood to Grandma’s for a holiday meal? Most parents know that manners don’t come naturally to children, and though we strive to teach children niceties like “please” and “thank you,” etiquette doesn’t begin and end with those magic words. What about the tot who squirms at the dinner table and jumps up after two minutes? What about the grade-schooler who runs wild at friends’ homes? Or how about the high-schooler who shrinks during introductions?

If you’re raising a manners-challenged child, you’re not alone. Childhood manners mishaps are as common as children themselves, says Chris J. Rock, etiquette coach and founder of Etiquette and Protocol Consulting. The good news: Youth is a time to learn and practice appropriate behavior, and mistakes are 18 MendoLakeFamilyLife

expected. Even better, swift etiquette intervention can lay the groundwork for a lifetime of civility.

TODDLER/PRESCHOOL: Table Training The golden rule—treat others as you’d like to be treated—is the basis of all etiquette, says Rock.

So how soon should parents start

Insist that children learn to introduce themselves with confidence. have notoriously short memories, so catchy songs can help etiquette lessons stick, says Rock. “We sing ‘Yes is better than Yeah’ with our grandchildren,” she says.

Table manners training can also start early. Rock recommends introducing flatware as soon as children can hold it (often in late infancy or early toddlerhood), discouraging eating with the hands, and gently stretching the time tots can sit still during meals. Start with just four or five minutes, and build to 15 or 20. Children as young as two can be taught to ask their host—in most cases, mom or dad—to be excused from the table when finished.

ELEMENTARY YEARS: Social Graces The grade-school years bring more friend visits and sleepovers— potential manners minefields, since kids will be away from parents’ watchful eyes. Teaching children to be a respectful guest in friends’ homes

November 2019 www.mendolakefamilylife.com

will ramp up confidence at a time when children are developing a social identity (and it will also increase the odds of receiving a repeat invitation).

to make a proper introduction, a habit that pays lifelong dividends. To start, insist that children learn to introduce

Pre-playdate, remind children that being a guest means respecting the household rules of their host. If the host family removes their shoes at the door or doesn’t allow snacking in bedrooms, a guest should comply. To show respect, ask children to address their friend’s parents as “Mr. and Mrs. Smith” unless directed by the parents to do otherwise. And for an especially nice touch, follow up a sleepover or a special playdate with a personal thank-you note from the child.

Remind children that being a guest means respecting the household rules of their host.

TWEENS/TEENS: Introduction Anxiety Want your tween or teen to make a good impression? Teach them

themselves with confidence and greet new acquaintances with eye contact and a firm handshake.

“Today’s teens are typically more comfortable interacting with technology than they are face-to-face.

And yet, those who master the ability to meet and greet others with ease will always be viewed more favorably,” notes Deborah King, president of

Final Touch Finishing School. The basics of a positive introduction include standing up straight, making eye contact, smiling, saying hello and your name in a clear voice, and extending a firm handshake.

When introducing two parties, the senior or more important person’s name is said first. Likewise, when introducing two friends, use equal terms for both; never use first and last names for one and just first name for the other. Encourage tweens and teens to practice introducing you and others at social gatherings and in group settings. Soon, they’ll be ready to take on the world—civilly, of course.

Malia Jacobson’s latest book is Sleep Tight, Every Night: Helping Toddlers and Preschoolers Sleep Well Without Tears, Tricks, or Tirades.

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November 2019

MendoLakeFamilyLife 19

‘Tis the Season to Save 7 Tips for a Debt-Free Holiday

By Kerrie McLoughlin

I

t happens earlier and earlier every year. The holiday music starts playing at the start of November, and the stores have holiday items out before Halloween is even over. And the commercials for toys! That’s when I really start to feel anxious. And what will we get for our relatives this year? How will we show our appreciation for people like teachers and daycare providers without burning up our credit card? Don’t worry. Here’s some help.

1

Have a plan. Yes, this means using that dirty word: budget. I set up a budget in Excel every year and love it because I can easily set formulas to add and subtract for me. This way I can play with numbers to see how much I actually have available to spend on each person on my shopping list. If doing a budget in Excel isn’t your thing, head to www.homeeverafter.com/ christmas-shopping-list-planner-budgetspreadsheet-free-printable for a free downloadable and printable holiday budget planner.

20 MendoLakeFamilyLife

2

Rack up the credit card reward points.

But only if you can handle it. If your credit card has a rewards program that offers gift cards, use it. Caution: You must be able to pay off every cent you put on your card by the due date. If you don’t have it budgeted, don’t purchase it. Using this system, every year I’m able to earn a few hundred dollars’ worth of gift cards. I use them to shop or just give them as gifts. Go to creditcards. com/reward.php for a comparison of the top credit card reward programs.

3

Rack up MyPoints. I’ve been a member of mypoints. com for many years and have earned gift cards not only by reading e-mails, but also by sometimes patronizing certain merchants. I’m quickly working toward saving up 10,000 MyPoints,

A love poem is free and goes a long way in my house. which will equal $50 cash in my PayPal account. The bonus is that I use my credit card to purchase gifts I would have bought anyway, so I double my holiday earning power.

4

Make it yourself. Gifts in a jar (tipjunkie.com/ jar-homemade-gifts), such as cookie, cake, pie, and drink mixes, and other homemade treats, always go over well, and they are

November 2019 www.mendolakefamilylife.com

cheap to make. Put them in reusable containers, and you’ve gone green, as well.

5

Give up on trying to impress. Sure, the mailman would dig a $100 gift card to a local restaurant, and your sitter would love a $100 iTunes card, but you probably can’t afford

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Do what you can, and let people appreciate you for who you are. either or you wouldn’t be reading this article. Do what you can, and let people appreciate you for who you are.

6

Sell stuff. Getting rid of clutter not only makes you money, it also makes room for incoming holiday gifts. Sell books, toys, clothes, movies, music, and more at consignment shops or on craigslist. com, or, if you’re really feeling industrious, throw a garage sale.

7

Buy nothing. To stay out of debt, consider not buying a gift for your spouse.

Instead let him or her know you want nothing but to live a debt-free life full of security and hope for the future. If you just can’t leave gift giving behind, it can be a fun to find something for each other on a $10 budget. A love poem is free and goes a long way in my house. ¶

Kerrie McLoughlin blogs at thekerrieshow. com about her roller-coaster-ride life homeschooling five kids.

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November 2019

MendoLakeFamilyLife 21

November Calendar of Events

Fun with Fungi

E

very fall, the Mendocino Coast comes alive with a variety of fungi. And they are celebrated and sampled at the Mendocino Wine and Mushroom Festival, which this year runs November 1–10. The week starts off with the Mendocino County Homebrew Festival on November 2 in Ukiah, followed by shroom-oriented exhibit’s opening reception on November 8 at the Willits Center for the Arts in Willits. On November 10, a Skunk Train foraging expedition will depart from Willits and a guided mushroom-identification walk will held at the Jug Handle Creek Farm and Nature Center in Caspar. In addition, Stanford Inn in Mendocino will host activities throughout the festival. For more information and to purchase tickets for any of these events, go to ilovemushrooms. visitmendocino.com and visit stanfordinn.com. ¶

Friday 1 Mushroom Feast. Mendocino County celebrates mushrooms with music, art, food, beer & wine. Countywide events. Runs thru Nov.10. See the full brochure for the times & locations: mendocino.com/ mendocino-wine-mushroom-festival. html.

Mushroom Exploration. Led by local mycologist Adrienne Long.

Introductory talk followed by exploration of local woods. $45. Ages 2–16: $20. Noon– 2 p.m. Stanford Inn. 10051 S. Big River Rd., Mendocino.

Reservations & prepayment required. stanfordinn.com.

Twelfth Night. Shakespeare’s

romantic comedy, featuring a modern 20th-century setting. $15–$20. Thursdays–Saturdays: 7:30 p.m. Sundays: 2 p.m. Runs thru Nov. 17. Willits High School Auditorium. 299 N. Main St., Willits. brownpapertickets.com/event/4417107.

Day of the Dead Celebration/Dia de los Muertos! 5–10 p.m. Middletown

22 MendoLakeFamilyLife

Art Center. 212486 Hwy. 175 & junction of Hwy. 29, Middletown. middletownartcenter.org.

Saturday 2 Noyo Meander Tour. Guided kayak

tour of Noyo River. $60; reservations required. Nov. 2 & 3: 2 p.m. Nov. 8 & 9: 10 a.m. Nov. 10: 1 p.m. Liquid Fusion Kayak. 32399 Basin St., Fort Bragg. liquidfusionkayak.com.

FREE Genealogy Class–Life in the Past Lane. Class will

explore genealogy topics thru class discussions, presentations, lessons & online webinars. Saturdays: 2 p.m.

Wednesdays: 5:30 p.m. Thru Dec. 21.

Lakeport Library. 1425 N. High St., Lakeport. library.lakecountyca.gov.

Mendocino County Homebrew Festival. $35–$55. Price goes up at the door. Benefits the Good Farm Fund.

21 & older only. 3–6 p.m. Ukiah Valley Conference Center. 200 S. School St., Ukiah. brownpapertickets.com/ event/4278152.

A Celebration of Women in Comedy!

Van Dyke. $25. Food/wine available for purchase. 7–10 p.m. Campovida.

13601 Old River Rd., Hopland. campovida.com.

FREE Day of the Dead Celebration.

Family activities. Bring a photocopy or printout of photo of deceased love one. 10:30 a.m.–5:30 p.m. Austin Park. 14077 Lakeshore Dr., Clearlake. lakecountybloom.com.

FREE Holiday Craft Fair. 10

a.m.–3 p.m. Clearlake Keys Club.

12980 Lakeland St., Clearlake. lakecountybloom.com.

FREE Cemetery Tour & Tea.

Highlights the family history of Lower Lake thru guided walk to a few historic family plots, followed by a slide show & review of the original 1867 cemetery logbook. Rain or shine. 2 p.m.: Meet at the Lower Lake Cemetery, on Lake St., north of Lower Lake High & Elementary Schools. 3 p.m.: Refreshments at Lower Lake School House Museum. 16435 Main St., Lower Lake. facebook.com/ events/858357251265227/.

Bay area comics. Headliner: Emily November 2019 www.mendolakefamilylife.com

FREE Lakeport Women’s Civic Club Annual Craft Sale. 9 a.m.–3 p.m.

Kelseyville Presbyterian Church. 5340 3rd St., Kelseyville. lakecochamber. chambermaster.com.

last 10 minutes. For ages 12 & older.

Wednesdays. 4–5 p.m. Redbud Library.

14785 Burns Valley Rd., Clearlake. library.lakecountyca.gov.

College. Lake Center. 2565 Parallel Dr., Lakeport. facebook.com/ lakecountyofficeofeducation.

Tuesday 5

Friday 8

FREE Storytime. Picture-book stories,

Sunday 3 4th Annual MCFB Harvest Farm-to-Table Fundraiser. Hosted

by Mendocino County Farm Bureau. $50. 10 a.m.–1 p.m. Barra of Mendocino. 7051 N. State St., Redwood Valley. mendofb.org.

Monday 4 FREE College & Transfer Fair.

Meet admission representatives from 4-year colleges & universities from across California. Students of all ages, parents & community members are invited. 3–6 p.m. Mendocino

FREE Calming Stretches. Fridays.

snacks & activities. Tuesdays. 11:30 a.m.–12:30 p.m. Middletown Library.

21256 Washington St., Middletown. library.lakecountyca.gov.

5:30–5:50 p.m. Willits Library. 390 E. Commercial St., Willits. facebook. com/willitslibrary.

FREE Admission Day at CV

FREE Mum Masquerade Flower

Starr Center. 5 a.m.–8 p.m. CV Starr Community Center. 300 S. Lincoln, Fort Bragg. facebook.com/ cvstarrcenter.

Show. Noon–4 p.m. Yacht Club.

15 5 St., Lakeport. lakecochamber. chambermaster.com.

ReRunway Second-Hand Fashion Show Fundraiser. Benefits

Wednesday 6 FREE RB Oculus Rift Virtual Reality. Time travel, space travel, or

go inside your favorite movie. Sessions

Sutter Lakeside Hospital’s cancer initiatives. $45. 5–9 p.m. Lake County Fairgrounds. 401 Martin St., Lakeport.

www.TwinPine.com

707.987.0197

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FREE ADMISSION Sat. & Sun. Dec. 14th & 15th 11:00 am-5:00 pm

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November 2019

MendoLakeFamilyLife 23

Register online: sutterhealth.org (search on “rerunway”).

Saturday 9 FREE International Games Day.

Play assorted board games. Ages 5–17.

11 a.m.–4 p.m. Round Valley Branch Library. 23925 Howard St., Round Valley. mendolibrary.org. 983-6736.

FREE Board Game Mania. Chess, Dungeons & Dragons, Rollick, Exploding Kittens & more. Ages 10 & older. Nov. 9 & 23. 2–4 p.m. Ukiah Library. 105 N. Main St., Ukiah. mendolibrary.com. 463-4490.

Symphony of the Redwoods Fall Concert. $25.

Ages 18 & younger: free. Nov. 9: 7:30 p.m. & Nov. 10: 2 p.m. Cotton Auditorium.

24 MendoLakeFamilyLife

500 N. Harold St., Fort Bragg. symphonyoftheredwoods.org.

FREE Holiday in the Pines. Fine arts & crafts, gifts & door prizes. Nov. 9 & 10: 10 a.m.–5 p.m. Twin Pines Casino. 22223 Hwy. 29, Middletown. cobbmtnartists.org.

FREE Guitars for the Troops. Live bands, BBQ dinner, live & silent auctions. Admission: $10. BBQ: $15.

BBQ: 5:30–7 p.m. Music starts at 6 p.m. Redwood Fairgrounds. 1055 N. State St., Ukiah. facebook.com/ events/488708245055595.

Sunday 10 Sips, Eats & Sweets. $25–$30.

Wine-tasting tickets sold separately for $5. Benefits CASA of Mendocino & Lake Counties. 21 & older only. 3–5:30

p.m. Barra of Mendocino. 7051 N. State St., Redwood Valley. facebook. com/CASAMendocinoCounty.

Monday 11 FREE Veterans Day at the Museum.

Enjoy free Museum admission all day in honor of Charles M. Schulz’s military service & the service of others on this Veterans Day. 10 a.m.–5 p.m. Charles M. Schulz Museum.

2301 Hardies Ln., Santa Rosa. schulzmuseum.org.

Tuesday 12 FREE Healthy Holiday Sides.

Includes tips & recipes for turning the traditional meal into a healthy one. Noon–1 p.m. Adventist Health

November 2019 www.mendolakefamilylife.com

Ukiah Valley. 275 Hospital Dr., Ukiah. adventisthealth.org.

Thursday 14 Mothers with Preschoolers. Support

group for moms. Register at mops. org/join & use code LTU9. Bring local dues ($20.) 9:30–11:30 a.m.

Redwood Valley Community Church.

951 E. School Way, Redwood Valley. rvcchurch.net/mops.

FREE Native American Heritage Celebration. Traditional Native dance

& song, cultural activities, local tribal history & more. Free Indian tacos.

4–7 p.m. Mendocino College. Lowery Student Center & Pomo Plaza. 1000 Hensley Creek Rd., Ukiah. facebook. com/mendocinocollege.

Friday 15 Wild & Scenic Film Festival. Nov.

15: Gala fundraiser for Mendocino Land Trust featuring 5 short films, a silent auction & live fund-a-need. $50, 6–9 p.m. Nov. 16: 12 short films, children’s activities, raffles. $15. Ages 18 & younger: $5. Noon–4 p.m. Eagles Hall. 210 N. Corry St., Fort Bragg. brownpapertickets.com.

Saturday 16 FREE Wild About Butterflies. A day of activities for kids & adults.

Storytime: 10:30 a.m. Butterflies Kids Craft: 11 a.m.–noon: Butterfly Talk (for adults): 2 p.m. Fort Bragg Library. 499 E. Laurel St., Fort Bragg. fortbragglibrary.org.

Thanksgiving Feast with Snoopy.

Help prepare a re-creation of Snoopy’s Thanksgiving meal of toast, popcorn & jelly beans, topped off with a Cold Stone ice cream dessert. Hands-on www.mendolakefamilylife.com

crafts & other activities. Event included in price of admission. ($5–$12 or free for ages 3 & younger).

1–4 p.m. Charles M. Schulz Museum.

2301 Hardies Ln., Santa Rosa.

579-4452. schulzmuseum.org.

Taste of Decadence. Local wines,

tasting, live auction & door prizes. $25. 2–5 p.m. Ukiah United Methodist Church. 270 N. Pine St., Ukiah. ukiahumc.org.

Spaghetti Dinner Fundraiser.

Auction & raffle. Tickets: $20 or 2 for $30. 6–8 p.m. Clearlake Youth

fair trade chocolate, coffee & tea

Spend the Holidays with Peanuts!

Saturday, November 16 1:00–4:00 pm THANKSGIVING FEAST WITH SNOOPY November 25–27 THANKSGIVING BREAK CLASSES November 29–30 FAMILY FUN WEEKEND Visit schulzmuseum.org for details and more holiday events!

2301 Hardies Lane Santa Rosa, CA 95403 (707) 579-4452 schulzmuseum.org ©PNTS

Hours: Weekdays 11:00 am–5:00 pm*

n

Weekends 10:00 am–5:00 pm

*Closed Tuesdays, Thanksgiving Day, Christmas Eve, and Christmas Day. Open Tuesday, November 26.

November 2019

MendoLakeFamilyLife 25

Center. 4750 Golf Ave., Clearlake. tinyurl.com/y33r5uf2.

SonoMusette: Music of 20th

Lake County Symphony Fall

French classics. $15–$25. 7 p.m.

Soper Reese Theatre. 275 S. Main St., Lakeport. soperreesetheatre.com.

$10.95–$49.95. 10:30 a.m. & 1 & 3:30 p.m. departures from Willits. (Fort Bragg departures added in Dec.) Runs thru Dec. 23. 299 E. Commercial St., Willits. skunktrain.com.

Concert. Featuring

Give Thanks Dance Party. Dance

FREE Mendocino Transit Authority

to disco, R&B & funk. $10. Beer & wine available for purchase. 8 p.m.–midnight. Middletown Art Center. 21456 Hwy. 175, Middletown. middletownartcenter.org.

Holiday Trolley. Thru Dec. 22.

Look for route map & schedule in this issue. Downtown Ukiah. mendocinotransit.org.

Sunday 17 Nathan Crozier performing the Bach Violin Concerto in E Major. $25–$30. 2–5 p.m. (Dress Rehearsal: 11 a.m., $5.

Ages 18 & younger: free). Soper Reese Theatre. 275 S. Main St., Lakeport. soperreesetheatre.com.

FREE Fall Plant Walk. Easy 2-to-3–

mile stroll thru Montgomery Woods State Reserve. Learn how to use the CalFlora app for citizen science & enter wild plant observations into the database. 9:45 a.m.–1 p.m. Meet at 9 a.m. at the east side of the CVS parking lot in Ukiah & carpool to the park. facebook.com/calflora.

Thursday 21 A Christmas Story. Based on the 1983 holiday classic film. $10–$20.

Nov. 21, 22, 29 & 30: 7 p.m. Nov. 24: 2 p.m. Runs thru Dec. 8. Ukiah Players Theatre. 1041 Low Gap Rd., Ukiah. ukiahplayerstheatre.org.

Friday 22 Soup & Salad Fundraiser.

Smorgasbord of soup. Includes salad, French bread & dessert. $15. Benefits library expansion fund. 6–8 p.m.

Masonic Hall. 428 N. Main St., Fort Bragg. fortbragglibrary.org.

Saturday 23 SambaDá. South & Central America percussion styles blended with a funk & reggae back beat. $30. 7:30 p.m.

SPACE Theater. 508 W. Perkins St., Ukiah. spaceperformingarts.org.

26 MendoLakeFamilyLife

Century Paris. Performance of

Thursday 28 Thanksgiving Dinner at the Blue Wing. 3-course dinner. Sittings are at 1, 3 & 5 p.m. Blue Wing Restaurant. 9520 Main St., Upper Lake. Call for reservations: 275-2233. tallmanhotel.com.

Friday 29 10th Annual Festival of Lights.

Thru Dec. 22. Garden plants lit up with holiday lights. Doors: 5 p.m.

Last entry: 7 p.m. $10. Ages 16 & younger: free. Mendocino Coast Botanical Gardens. 18220 Hwy. 1, Fort Bragg. gardenbythesea.org.

FREE Festival of Trees & Holiday Bazaar. Activities

& crafts for children, with visits from Mr. & Mrs. Claus. Nov. 29: 10 a.m.–5 p.m. Tree-lighting ceremony with caroling: 5 p.m. Nov. 30: 10 a.m.–4 p.m. Gualala Arts Center. 46501 Old State Hwy., Gualala. gualalaarts.org.

Family Fun Weekend. Cartoonist

& storyteller Joe Wos will give live performances & cartoon workshops.

10 a.m.–5 p.m. $5–$12. Ages 3 & younger: free. Charles M. Schulz Museum. 2301 Hardies Ln., Santa Rosa. schulzmuseum.org.

Saturday 30 Ukiah on Ice: Holiday Ice Skating Rink. $10 skate session, includes skates. Daily thru Jan. 5, 2020. Next to Alex Thomas Plaza, on School Street. Schedule at cityofukiah.com/ ukiah-on-ice.

FREE Dickens’ Christmas Market.

Arts & food booths. Skating rink, sledding hill & more. 11 a.m.–6 p.m. Pet Parade: noon. Photos with Santa: noon–5 p.m. Tree lighting: 5:30 p.m. Downtown Lakeport. lakeportmainstreet.com.

FREE 60th Annual Thanksgiving Arts & Crafts Fair. Nov.

29 & 30: 10 a.m.–5 p.m. Mendocino Arts Center.

45200 Little Lake St., Mendocino. mendocinoartcenter.org.

Magical Christmas Train. Featuring

Santa, festive treats, reindeer games & sing-alongs. 90-minute round-trip.

November 2019 www.mendolakefamilylife.com

Holidays 2019–20 SEASON HIGHLIGHTS

WEILL HALL | SCHROEDER HALL

DANÚ AN EMERALD ISLE CHRISTMAS

FRI, DEC 13 AT 7:30 P.M.

VOCTAVE, THE SPIRIT OF THE SEASON

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SPANISH HARLEM ORCHESTRA SALSA NAVIDAD FRI, DEC 20 AT 7:30 P.M.

1 8 0 1 E a s t C o t a t i Av e . R o h n e r t P a r k , C A 9 4 9 2 8

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THE ONLY EDUCATION FAIR IN THE NORTH BAY! Learn about top private, charter, elementary schools & after-school activities. Meet representatives, admission directors & enrichment teachers! To learn more call 707-205-1539.

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Learn about Local History

Head Start Child Development Program

T

he fabric of a community is woven together with family ties. And where better to find literally concrete evidence of those connections than at a cemetery? As part of its exploration of local history, the Lower Lake School Museum is hosting a tour of the local graveyard that will feature stories of pioneering families. Following the tour, there will be a slide show and an opportunity to review the 1867 cemetery log. Tea and refreshments will be served. The free event will be held on November 2, with the tour starting at 2 p.m. at the Lower Lake Cemetery in Lower Lake. The slideshow will  be held at 3 p.m. at the Lower Lake Schoolhouse Museum in Lower Lake. For more information, go to facebook.com/ events/858357251265227. ¶

(707)Development 462-2582 Program License #230111843 Child Applications online: www.ncoinc.org • (707) 462-2582

Courtesy of California State Parks, 2016.

www.mendolakefamilylife.com

• Coastnorth end of Fairgrounds Fort Bragg - Lincoln St. PO Box 966 Ukiah 95482

treeoflifeschool@pacific.net www.treeoflifeschool.net

Accelerated Achievement  Academy 

Montgomery Woods State Reserve

ot all scientists have degrees. Some are just regular folks, called citizen scientists, who help researchers collect data, sometimes with the assistance of smartphone apps.

These everyday scientists will be hard at work at the Fall Plant Walk at the Montgomery Woods State Reserve in Ukiah, and they welcome new participants. Attendees are instructed to download Calflora’s phone app Observer Pro (for iPhone or android) before the hike and log in using their Calflora email addresses and passwords. Then during the relatively easy twoto three–mile journey, they will record their observations about, and take photos of, the plants they encounter. Walkers will meet on November 17 at 9 a.m. at the west side of the CVS parking lot in Ukiah and carpool to the park, where the hike will start at 9:45 a.m.; the event will end at 1 p.m. For more information, go to facebook.com/calflora. ¶

Lakeport - Howard Ave. Clearlake - Pearl Ave. ClearlakeLocated - Meadowbrookon Dr.

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Get Mom’s Attention!

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Humor Break arm. Once she’s seated at the table with a pile of neon orange noodles in front of her, though, she will eat like it’s her last supper.

How Loud Are They Whining?

Gratitude Is a Matter of Perspective

Be grateful for: Your kid’s ability to be fully present in each moment.

She’s not checking her texts or her social media notifications. She’s really living, man.

By Pam Moore When parents think of the things we’re grateful for, our kids generally make the top of the list. That said, when your when you notice the “creative” way in which they’ve taken a ballpoint pen to the couch cushions… that river of gratitude suddenly dries right up.

With Thanksgiving approaching, I thought it might be helpful to “reframe” the way we view our kids’ shenanigans: Your kid is asking you for a snack. You tell her she’s going to have to wait a minute; you’re in the middle of something. She responds by telling you exactly what kind of snack she’d like. “I need Goldfish,” she informs you. She continues. “The cheddar kind. And they need to be in the purple ramekin.” You thought you had a five-year-old, not a rock star with a mile-long event rider. You look at her and say, “What would be a nicer way to ask?” with a syrupy-sweet voice.

Matching your saccharine request, 30 MendoLakeFamilyLife

she complies, asking, “Can I please have cheddar Goldfish in the purple ramekin? And also I want more than my sister. Please.”

Be grateful for: Your child’s ability to know what she wants. This child will not need you to call her professor or landlord on her behalf 20 years from now.

You’re ready to leave the park.

Your child is not. She’s creating a castle out of gravel using the shoe you specifically told her not to take off her foot. As you approach her, you notice the wild look in her eye. She is hungry.

The smell of a meltdown is in the air.

“Let’s go!” you say. “NOOOOO!” she says. You offer macaroni and cheese for lunch. She glances up for a fraction of a second then goes back to her task.

In about seven minutes you will be carry-dragging her to the car with her shoe tucked awkwardly under your

“You should be ready for school in five minutes,” you announce. Your child says she is ready. She’s in a floral tank top, a tutu, and leopard print leggings. It is snowing. She has on non-matching socks and her sparkly Velcro sneakers.

“But…” you stop before you complete the sentence because you don’t know how to say “You look homeless” nicely.

“Sweetheart, it’s November. How about a long sleeve on top of that tank top?” is the best thing you can come up with.

After all, she is fully dressed. She’s wearing sneakers on P.E. day. Her teeth are brushed. The bus is coming in 10 minutes. There’s no time for a visit from the fashion police. “Do you feel good in that outfit?” you ask. She nods, beaming.

Be grateful for: The fact that your kid thinks for herself. If she knows what the other kids are wearing, she clearly does not care.

There is always something to be grateful for if you look hard enough.

As parents, it’s important to remember that how you view a situation depends on where you stand (and of course how loudly your kid is whining).

This article was originally published on Mazel Together.

Find Pam Moore’s free guide to crushing Impostor Syndrome at pam-moore.com.

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