Sonoma Family Life November 2019

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November 2019

Practice Gratitude Ways to give thanks

Health Coverage ACA enrollment

Raise a Reader Creative tips

Foster A mom’s story Love

November 2019

Every Issue 6

Dear Reader

7

Cooking with Kids Smoothie with Style

8

10

Bits and Pieces Hear Them Roar His Other Sled Is a Boat Legomania

Features

Magic Hands Paper-Folding Fun

10 The Health Insurance Shuffle Take advantage of the ACA enrollment period.

Make a Basket Bot

12 Go for Gratitude Help kids to give back to their communities.

14 Just Add Love Peek into the heart of a foster mom.

24 Calendar of Events Hike It Off

34 Humor Break How Loud Are They Whining?

16 Manners Magic Teach age-appropriate ways to be courteous.

18 ‘Tis the Season to Save Tips for staying in your budget.

20 The Glory of Routines Cook in batches and other ideas for saving time.

22 Raise a Reader Cultivate a love of books.

34 4 SonomaFamilyLife

7 November 2019 www.sonomafamilylife.com

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Holidays 2019–20 SEASON HIGHLIGHTS

WEILL HALL | SCHROEDER HALL

DANÚ AN EMERALD ISLE CHRISTMAS

FRI, DEC 13 AT 7:30 P.M.

VOCTAVE, THE SPIRIT OF THE SEASON

THU, DEC 19 AT 7:30 P.M.

SPANISH HARLEM ORCHESTRA SALSA NAVIDAD FRI, DEC 20 AT 7:30 P.M.

1 8 0 1 E a s t C o t a t i Av e . R o h n e r t P a r k , C A 9 4 9 2 8

gmc.sonoma.edu 7 0 7 . 6 6 4 . 4 2 4 6

@GREENMUSICCENTER

Preferred

@GREENMUSICCTR @GREENMUSICCENTER

Dear Reader

T

hanksgiving is almost upon us, and with it, an opportunity to count our blessings. Our readers are definitely one of ours. What are yours?

Thanks to the Affordable Care Act (ACA), millions have access to health care, and as a result, well-being. If you have been thinking about enrolling, now is the time.

The new enrollment period runs November 1–December 15. Turn to “The Health Insurance Shuffle” (page 10) for tips on finding the best plan for your family.

Books may be on the gratitude lists of lovers of les livres. If you are one of the literary-minded, turn to “Raise a Reader” (page 22) to find out how to effectively share your passion for the written word with your kids.

Now back to that question: What are your blessings? For inspiration to focus on the positive, read “Go with Gratitude” (page 12).

You might even end up feeling like there’s a little something you can do to give back.

Sharon Gowan Publisher/Editor Sharon@family-life.us

Some children don’t have a family to nurture them and their interests. For these little ones, foster parents offer a safety net until a forever home is found. And as Deirdre Littlefield learned, it’s not just the kids who benefit. Read about her foster parenting journey in “Just Add Love” (page 14).

Sometimes, however, life is so challenging we need to just let ourselves receive.

For those who, as I write, are suffering displacement and/or the loss of their homes due to the Kincade Fire, now is one of those times. May you find strength in the support of family, friends, and community.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Along with familial love, health is one of those “biggies” for which many are grateful.

Registration for Kindergarten and Transitional Kindergarten (Kinder Bridge) for 2020-21 School Year begins February 4 & 5

Call 542-6272 to sign up

A limited number of interdistrict transfer requests for 2020-21 will be accepted Yulupa Primary School Preschool–Third Grade 2250 Mesquite Drive, Santa Rosa 707 542-6272

Strawberry Intermediate School Fourth–Sixth Grade 2311 Horseshoe Drive, Santa Rosa 707 526-4433

Consistently high student academic achievement at both schools

YMCA provides on-site child care

Business Marketing Renee Nutcher renee@family-life.us Warren Kaufman warren@family-life.us

Features Editor Melissa Chianta melissa@family-life.us

Production Manager Donna Bogener production@family-life.us Natalie Bruzon natalie@family-life.us

Contributing Writers Sandra Gordon Malia Jacobson Deirdre Littlefield Kerrie McLoughlin Pam Moore Karen Nochimowski Maria Russo and Pamela Paul Kathryn Streeter

Billing Jan Wasson-Smith

Your child’s joy of learning is nurtured with our: • Excellent Teachers • Reduced Class Size (K–3) • Kinder Bridge Transitional Kindergarten • Extended Day Kindergarten (8:30-1:25) • Fully Staffed Libraries and Technology Labs • Visual and Performing Arts Programs

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Web and Social Media

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Two-year Kinder Bridge program offered for children turning five on or after Sept. 2, 2020.

707 542-2201 • Visit us at www.bvusd.org 6 SonomaFamilyLife

November 2019 www.sonomafamilylife.com

Cooking with Kids

Smoothie with Style A New Twist on a Traditional Snack

By Momma Chef

M

y kids’ snacking habits tend to occur in waves. They will fall in love with something and then request it—please, please, please, Mom!—for every single snack, every single day.

And then, without much warning, my little connoisseurs will turn their backs on their snacking obsession, usually after I’ve gone to the local warehouse grocery store and stocked up on the aforementioned Best Snack Ever.

Fortunately, one snack that never grows old at our house is the traditional sliced apples and peanut butter. The crisp and cool tartness of an apple pairs perfectly with the sweet creaminess of peanut butter.

It’s a simple snack my older kids can prepare at home, and it’s easy for us to take on the road. (In fact, I’m pretty sure I have a spare apple slicer and a jar of peanut butter in the back of my car right now.)

You’d think I would be satisfied with this treat: fruit plus peanut butter equals lots of protein, fiber, and deliciousness. And yet, you know that my Momma-Chef brain is always stirring up new takes on old favorites.

Using PB and apples as my inspiration, last fall I created this good-to-the-last-drop Candied Apple www.sonomafamilylife.com

Candied Apple Peanut Butter Smoothie Ingredients • ½ cup milk • ½ cup vanilla ice cream • ¼ cup peanut butter • one green apple, sliced • caramel syrup or cinnamon (optional) Serves: 1 large cup

Peanut Butter Smoothie. My own kids love it as a special treat, especially when they have the chance to drizzle the caramel on it themselves. I was a kitchen superhero when I whipped up a batch for my son’s friend. A notoriously picky eater, he had come home with us after a soccer game.

Remembering that he previously had rebuffed sliced apples and peanut butter, I offered to make him this special smoothie. I wasn’t surprised when, after draining the first glass

November 2019

Instructions 1. Pour in order into a blender: milk, ice cream, peanut butter, and sliced apple.

2. Blend on medium speed for 2 minutes.

3. Pour into your favorite cup.

4. Drizzle with caramel or sprinkle cinnamon. in record time, he shyly asked for another serving.

With peanut butter, milk, and apples— and the indulgence of a little ice cream—this smoothie delivers the perfect combination of protein, fiber, and fun that my growing athletic kids need. So, if you’re looking for something that’s both yummy and nutritious, grab your blender and try this recipe.

Karen Nochimowski, the mom behind mommachef.com a blog featuring the quick, easy

SonomaFamilyLife 7

Bits & Pieces

Lion King KIDS

Hear Them Roar

W

hen Disney’s The Lion King came to the silver screen in 1994, it was a box office smash, and so was the musical, which followed a few years later. Local kids will bring a pint-sized version of that Broadway hit, called Lion King KIDS, to the stage of the Steele Lane Community Center in Santa Rosa. The interactive 40-minute show will allow young audience members the chance to sing along and participate in the story at a few key moments. Shows will be held on November 1 and 8 at 7 p.m., November 2 and 9 at 1 p.m. and 3:30 p.m., and November 3 and 10 at 3 p.m. Kids can make an African-beaded headband a half hour before the show. Tickets are $5 and may be purchased at atheaterforchildren.com. ¶

His Other Sled Is a Boat

P

Santa’s Riverboat Arrival

ssst! Santa has a secret: He has many doubles, and some of them even avoid using flying sleds. Petaluma’s Santa, for example, gets around by riverboat. Standing at the mast of a Lind Marine tugboat decorated in holiday finery, he and the Mrs. will float into town on November 30, 11:30 a.m.–1:30 p.m., at the River Plaza in Petaluma. Ballet dancers in Nutcracker costumes will also be on hand to greet him and hand out candy canes. After hobnobbing with the Christmas duo, revelers can stick around for the town’s tree-lighting ceremony, which will be held 5:30–7:30 p.m. at Theater Square Plaza. Both events are free.

Find more information, including a video of Santa’s 2018 arrival, at facebook.com/petalumadowntown. ¶

Legomania

L

ego patented the design of its stud-and-tube bricks in 1958. And since then everyone from sticky-fingered 2-year-olds to professional artists has used them to create.

The annual Brickpalooza in Santa Rosa aims to showcase the versatility of the toy-wonder with an expansive exhibition of Lego art, play areas, and hands-on activity booths. In addition, vendors will be selling an array of Lego-related products and services. The annual festival will be held on November 17, 10 a.m.–5 p.m., at the Santa Rosa Veterans Memorial Building in Santa Rosa. Tickets are $12–$60 and may be purchased via Eventbrite or the Facebook page facebook.com/brickpaloozasantarosa. ¶

8 SonomaFamilyLife

Brickpalooza

November 2019 www.sonomafamilylife.com

Magic Hands

P

atrick Martin has traveled the globe performing his comedic sleight-of-hand magic show for celebrities, politicians, and corporate executives. But when he performs at the Charles M. Schulz Museum in Santa Rosa, his audience will be decidedly less glamorous but most likely just as enthusiastic.

The children’s performance, presented in conjunction with the Abracadabra! The Magic of Peanuts exhibit, will be held on November 10 at 3 p.m. and is free with admission ($5–$12; free for ages 3 and younger). Find out more at schulzmuseum.org. ¶

Patrick Martin

Paper-Folding Fun

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any children who grow up in Japan learn origami. Henry Kaku turned it into a lifelong pursuit, and a career. He created his first piece of origami—a person wearing a kimono—in the 1950s when he was 5 or 6 years old and by the 1970s was teaching classes. Now he travels the globe offering instruction, making a stop at the Children’s Museum of Sonoma County in Santa Rosa on November 9, 1–3 p.m. Kids can expect to learn how to make a crane—an international symbol of peace—and other pieces of origami, and find out about the art’s history, too. The class is free with admission to the museum ($9–$12 or free for babies younger than 12 months; EBT cardholders with ID get in for $2). See cmosc.org. ¶

Henry Kaku

Make a Basket Bot

I

ndigenous peoples all over the globe have been making baskets for millennia.

The California Indian Museum and Cultural Center is inviting kids ages 7 and older to learn about this ancient art at Traditional Ecological Knowledge for Kids classes at two local libraries. Participants will not only learn the basics of weaving a basket, but will also find out about Native American cultural practices; traditional lifeways, foods, and medicines; and the impacts of colonization. The free, one-hour classes will be held on November 9 at 11 a.m. at the Healdsburg Regional Library in Healdsburg and on the same day at 2 p.m. at the Sebastopol Regional Library in Sebastopol. Class size is limited; register for the Healdsburg class at sonomacounty. libcal.com/event/5748485 and for the Sebastopol class at sonomacounty.libcal. com/event/5748486. The Museum will also be presenting a Native STEM Makers Program, which will teach kids ages 8–12 how to make “basket bots” and how to process hazelnuts. These classes will be held on November 2 at 11 a.m. at the Northwest Santa Rosa Library in Santa Rosa; November 13 at 6 p.m. at the Windsor Regional Library in Windsor; November 22 at 4 p.m. at the Healdsburg Regional Library in Healdsburg; and on November 30 at 10:30 a.m. at the Central Santa Rosa Library in Santa Rosa. Go to sonomacounty.libcal.com to register. ¶

www.sonomafamilylife.com

November 2019

SonomaFamilyLife 9

specialist—a certified application counselor who can answer questions and help you enroll in California’s insurance exchange program.

Or, even better, get a consultation with a certified insurance broker; this service is also accessible through the “find help” option.

An insurance broker is a licensed and certified professional who has gone through federal training to understand the ACA and the

The Health Insurance Shuffle Choose the Best ACA Plan for Your Family

By Sandra Gordon

S

hould you change your health insurance plan? Which plan offers the best deal? Now’s the time to find out.

Open enrollment, the once-a-year period when the federal government, thanks to the Affordable Care Act (ACA), allows consumers to choose a health insurance plan or select a new one, begins this year on November 1 and runs through December 15. Health-care coverage applied for during this time will start January 1, 2020.

The ACA features insurance marketplaces or “exchanges” in every state. (Go to Covered California at coveredca.com to find the California 10 SonomaFamilyLife

marketplace.) These online marketplaces are where consumers can go to compare and buy individual health insurance plans.

The following tips can help simplify the process of choosing a plan.

Consult experts. Shopping for health insurance, even using the exchanges, can be confusing. Don’t go it alone. If you have a question about which health plan to choose and what the lingo means, visit healthcare. gov and click on “find help.” You’ll be directed to an enrollment health

Shopping for health insurance can be confusing. Don’t go it alone. financial implications of the various choices. A broker can help you choose the best plan and offer an opinion. Brokers receive a commission from insurance companies for their services, which are free to consumers. “There’s no discount by skipping a broker, so you might as well take advantage of their expertise,” says Katherine Woodfield, author of Don’t Buy THAT Health Insurance: Become an Educated Health Care Consumer (Dog Ear Publishing, 2012).

Focus on health plans with the highest deductible. The ACA offers four plan types. Bronze, which has the lowest monthly premium, features insurance coverage for 60 percent of health-care costs, with 40 percent paid by consumers. It is followed

by Silver 70/30 Gold (80/20), and Platinum (90/10). The latter has the highest monthly premium.

November 2019 www.sonomafamilylife.com

Each type offers standard health benefits. They include preventive and wellness visits, including chronic disease management, and maternity and newborn care; mental and behavioral health treatment; services and devices to help people with injuries, disabilities, or chronic conditions; lab tests; pediatric care; prescription drugs; and outpatient care. Higher premiums do not include more benefits.

out of your pocket every month. When you pay the lowest monthly premium possible, you’ll pay less overall in medical care expenses.”

Skeptical? Do the math. Let’s say you call your doctor and pharmacist to get the full retail cost of each of your doctor’s visits, blood tests, and medications. (Woodfield advocates actually doing this.) If your total medical costs for the year add up to $6,000, on the (60/40) Bronze plan, you’ll have to pay 40 percent of those costs, or $2,400 and your premium, at say, $100 per month, will be $1,200 annually, for a total of $3,600. If you’re on the (70/30) Silver plan, with a $200 monthly premium, you’ll pay www.sonomafamilylife.com

Choose a plan that includes your providers. If your doctor isn’t listed as a provider for a health plan you’re considering, call the doctor’s office to see if she or he will be signing up with the plan, Woodfield says.

Providers can change the plans they participate in, and they often do. But if your doctors don’t accept the health insurance plan you’re considering, pick a different plan or change doctors.

Sign up for a Health Savings Account. To manage health-care costs, Woodfield also suggests enrolling in a health savings account (HSA), which is a fund that may only be used for qualified medical expenses. Then, pay for healthcare that isn’t covered as you go, just like you do for groceries or gas. The IRS deems what’s an acceptable medical expense for an HSA, and its list includes more services than what a health insurance company will cover.

Visit healthcare.gov/glossary/ health-savings-account-hsa/ for more information. If you’re not eligible for an HSA, a personal savings account designated for medical expenses will do. ¶ Sandra Gordon is an award-winning freelance writer.

November 2019

 Seattle (SEA)  Portland (PDX)  Los Angeles (LAX)  Orange County (SNA)  San Diego (SAN)  Phoenix (PHX)  Dallas (DFW)  San Francisco (SFO)  Denver (DEN)  Minneapolis (MSP)  Las Vegas (LAS)

TS

If you’re not eligible for an HSA, a personal savings account designated for medical expenses will do.

Monthly health insurance premiums never go away, but medical service costs do. The maximum out-of-pocket limit for an ACA Marketplace plan for 2020 is $8,200 for an individual plan and $16,400 for a family. The Bronze plan will allow you to meet your deductible faster.

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Woodfield recommends choosing a health plan with the lowest premium, i.e. one in the Bronze category. Her motto is “Keep fixed expenses low. In other words, pay the lowest premium possible, so you’ll have the least amount of money automatically going

$1,800 in medical costs and $2,400 in premiums, for a total annual cost of $4,200, and so on. Get the idea?

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specific when communicating what each person brings to their lives.

For instance, “I’m thankful for you because you tell funny jokes and make me laugh.”

• On Thanksgiving Day, call people whose presence you miss around the

“This a wonderful day.

I’ve never seen this one before.”—Maya Angelou

Go for Gratitude 10 Ways to Foster a Charitable Spirit

By Kathryn Streeter

P

eople who practice gratitude are happier. That’s what the research says, according to the Harvard Health Publishing article, “Giving Thanks Can Make You Happier”: “Gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships.” Gratitude is a thankful outlook on life, and its very expression tends to be action-oriented.

Here are 10 ways to help foster a spirit of gratitude in your children.

• At the beginning of November, present your children with “Thanksgiving notebooks,” which they can use to daily record what they’re thankful for.

• For each letter of their names, have your children think of a word that 12 SonomaFamilyLife

expresses something that they are thankful for. (Example: Sam: S for soccer; A for animals; M for mom.)

Write the words down on long, narrow strips of paper that later will be hung on the refrigerator to create a Thanksgiving display.

• Have your kids write letters expressing thanks to family members and close friends. Tell them to be

dinner table. Hand the phone to your children and let them put in their own words why they miss the person on the other end of the phone.

• Weather conditions can be unpleasant in November. If it’s grim and kids are complaining, counter their negativity with positivity. For example, ask them to talk about what’s good about rain and gray skies. Extend this exercise to other common sources of grumbling.

• Help your children identify one child and one teacher at school who could use a boost of encouragement. Have your child create Thanksgiving cards that precisely explain why they’re thankful to have this person in their lives. Especially urge kids to illustrate the card’s message, to add a personal touch.

• Read books about thankfulness, such as Last Stop on Market Street (Putnam’s Sons, 2015), Crenshaw (Square Fish, 2017), and I Am Malala (Little, Brown & Co., 2016). Refugee (Scholastic, 2017) and Homeroom Diaries (Arrow, 2014) are good selections for tweens/teens.

• Watch movies filled with messages of gratitude, such as A Charlie Brown

November 2019 www.sonomafamilylife.com

Thanksgiving (1973), Up (2009), and Veggie Tales’ episode “Madame Blueberry” (2006). For older kids, consider Lion (2016) and Life Is Beautiful (1998).

• Memorize a quote about gratitude that your child can recite on

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• Maya Angelou: “This a wonderful day. I’ve never seen this one before.”

• Aesop: “Gratitude is the sign of noble souls.”

• A. A. Milne: “Piglet noticed that even though he had a Very Small Heart, it could hold a rather large amount of Gratitude.”

• Cicero: “Gratitude is not only the greatest of all virtues, but the parent of all the others.”

• Oprah Winfrey: “Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.”

• Practice kindness. Make November your family’s month to serve low-income residents in your area.

When your kids are serving meals at a soup kitchen or reading to kids at a shelter for women and children, they’ll more readily recognize the gifts in their own lives. ¶ Find Kathryn Streeter on Twitter @ streeterkathryn.

www.sonomafamilylife.com

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November 2019

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SonomaFamilyLife 13

4 years old and, wearing just a hospital johnny, appeared almost as scared as I was. He slept well that first night.

The next day, proudly wearing his dreads, this poor little guy sat bravely amongst our typical Irish Catholic family. He slowly came out of his shell as he told us his

Just Add Love The Evolution of a Foster Parent

By Deirdre Littlefield

I

had wanted to adopt a child from foster care since I was a little girl. Ever since I saw the movie Annie, I was hooked on the idea. I wondered how it was possible that there were children nobody wants, children without a family.

It took many years for me to follow my instincts and start the process.

It was such a scary idea to bring a child I’d never met into our home. I wouldn’t know their genetics, their background, or family history. I did know that there are hundreds of thousands of kids in the United States who live in foster care. I also knew that I had the skills to parent, and the capacity to love, any child.

Believing this, I finally jumped in.

14 SonomaFamilyLife

Every child needs and deserves a family.

There are a few different ways one can parent a child in foster care.

We knew our long-term goal was to adopt but decided to do emergency care while we waited to go through the adoption process. Our first placement arrived the night before Thanksgiving in 2011. He was

I knew that I had the skills to parent, and the capacity to love, any child. likes and dislikes. My kids and their cousins included this young boy in their games, treating him as if they had known him forever. It began to really sink in: foster children are exactly like my children, except a scary adjective—foster—follows them wherever they go.

After that first boy, we had many other kids—from the mischievous toddler twins to the 3-year-old boy who clearly suffered from neglect— and they were all hard to forget. We parented lovely tween girls who, when they first arrived, immediately tried to take care of my little one because that was all they knew how to do—to offer, instead of receive, nurturing. We had one 10-year-old boy who put on rollerblades for the first time while staying with us.

He was such a natural and skated well immediately. It doesn’t seem right to think that he never had the opportunity to be part of a team

November 2019 www.sonomafamilylife.com

Thank you for choosing local first! and reap all of the lifelong benefits that such an experience can bring.

My all-time favorite was an athletic, sassy, and capable 10-year-old girl. She could rule the world if somebody would just give her a chance, if she just had a permanent family.

Foster children are exactly like my children, except a scary adjective— foster —follows them wherever they go.

One special child we adopted. He was four pounds when he came to us, directly from the hospital, in late 2012. All he needed was our love, stability, and a home to thrive in. This little guy has grown into the funniest, most lovable human being you can imagine.

Every child needs and deserves a family, and having one means that when they grow up they will be more likely to positively contribute to society. It is in all of our best interests to offer what we can. There are so many ways to enrich the life of a child in foster care and, in so doing, leave a lifelong imprint on this world. If we can do it, anybody can. ¶ Deirdre Littlefield is a mother to three children, two biological sons, ages 26 and 13, and one adopted son, age 7. She works for a nonprofit that advocates for children and “loves all things domestic.”

Spend the Holidays with Peanuts!

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November 2019

SonomaFamilyLife 15

teaching children manners? “You can’t start them too young,” she notes.

“There is no certain age when the magic begins.”

That means establishing family behavior norms early on. If you don’t want your children to run indoors, traipse through airplane rows, or jump on furniture, correct these behaviors in toddlerhood with a firm, gentle reminder: “That is not how we act in this family. It doesn’t matter what other children do.” Toddlers

Manners Magic Holiday Etiquette for Tots to Teens

By Malia Jacobson

A

lready dreading the thought of taking your rambunctious brood to Grandma’s for a holiday meal? Most parents know that manners don’t come naturally to children, and though we strive to teach children niceties like “please” and “thank you,” etiquette doesn’t begin and end with those magic words. What about the tot who squirms at the dinner table and jumps up after two minutes? What about the grade-schooler who runs wild at friends’ homes? Or how about the high-schooler who shrinks during introductions?

If you’re raising a manners-challenged child, you’re not alone. Childhood manners mishaps are as common as children themselves, says Chris J. Rock, etiquette coach and founder of Etiquette and Protocol Consulting. The good news: Youth is a time to learn and practice appropriate behavior, and mistakes are 16 SonomaFamilyLife

expected. Even better, swift etiquette intervention can lay the groundwork for a lifetime of civility.

TODDLER/PRESCHOOL: Table Training The golden rule—treat others as you’d like to be treated—is the basis of all etiquette, says Rock.

So how soon should parents start

Insist that children learn to introduce themselves with confidence. have notoriously short memories, so catchy songs can help etiquette lessons stick, says Rock. “We sing ‘Yes is better than Yeah’ with our grandchildren,” she says.

Table manners training can also start early. Rock recommends introducing flatware as soon as children can hold it (often in late infancy or early toddlerhood), discouraging eating with the hands, and gently stretching the time tots can sit still during meals. Start with just four or five minutes, and build to 15 or 20. Children as young as two can be taught to ask their host—in most cases, mom or dad—to be excused from the table when finished.

ELEMENTARY YEARS: Social Graces The grade-school years bring more friend visits and sleepovers— potential manners minefields, since kids will be away from parents’ watchful eyes. Teaching children to be a respectful guest in friends’ homes

November 2019 www.sonomafamilylife.com

will ramp up confidence at a time when children are developing a social identity (and it will also increase the odds of receiving a repeat invitation).

to make a proper introduction, a habit that pays lifelong dividends. To start, insist that children learn to introduce

Pre-playdate, remind children that being a guest means respecting the household rules of their host. If the host family removes their shoes at the door or doesn’t allow snacking in bedrooms, a guest should comply. To show respect, ask children to address their friend’s parents as “Mr. and Mrs. Smith” unless directed by the parents to do otherwise. And for an especially nice touch, follow up a sleepover or a special playdate with a personal thank-you note from the child.

Remind children that being a guest means respecting the household rules of their host.

TWEENS/TEENS: Introduction Anxiety Want your tween or teen to make a good impression? Teach them

themselves with confidence and greet new acquaintances with eye contact and a firm handshake.

“Today’s teens are typically more comfortable interacting with technology than they are face-to-face.

And yet, those who master the ability to meet and greet others with ease will always be viewed more favorably,” notes Deborah King, president of

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

Final Touch Finishing School. The basics of a positive introduction include standing up straight, making eye contact, smiling, saying hello and your name in a clear voice, and extending a firm handshake.

When introducing two parties, the senior or more important person’s name is said first. Likewise, when introducing two friends, use equal terms for both; never use first and last names for one and just first name for the other. Encourage tweens and teens to practice introducing you and others at social gatherings and in group settings. Soon, they’ll be ready to take on the world—civilly, of course.

Malia Jacobson’s latest book is Sleep Tight, Every Night: Helping Toddlers and Preschoolers Sleep Well Without Tears, Tricks, or Tirades.

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1451 Southwest Blvd 707-795-4433

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Rohnert Park

6314 Commerce Blvd 707-303-7474

Petaluma

919 Lakeville St 707-769-8989

Healdsburg 1051 Vine St 707-433-2911

November 2019

Windsor

6580 Hembree Ln #258 707-836-1700

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4501 Montgomery Dr. 707-890-5033

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3125 Cleveland Ave 707-595-6505

SonomaFamilyLife 17

‘Tis the Season to Save 7 Tips for a Debt-Free Holiday

By Kerrie McLoughlin

I

t happens earlier and earlier every year. The holiday music starts playing at the start of November, and the stores have holiday items out before Halloween is even over. And the commercials for toys! That’s when I really start to feel anxious. And what will we get for our relatives this year? How will we show our appreciation for people like teachers and daycare providers without burning up our credit card? Don’t worry. Here’s some help.

1

Have a plan. Yes, this means using that dirty word: budget. I set up a budget in Excel every year and love it because I can easily set formulas to add and subtract for me. This way I can play with numbers to see how much I actually have available to spend on each person on my shopping list. If doing a budget in Excel isn’t your thing, head to www.homeeverafter.com/ christmas-shopping-list-planner-budgetspreadsheet-free-printable for a free downloadable and printable holiday budget planner.

18 SonomaFamilyLife

2

Rack up the credit card reward points.

But only if you can handle it. If your credit card has a rewards program that offers gift cards, use it. Caution: You must be able to pay off every cent you put on your card by the due date. If you don’t have it budgeted, don’t purchase it. Using this system, every year I’m able to earn a few hundred dollars’ worth of gift cards. I use them to shop or just give them as gifts. Go to creditcards. com/reward.php for a comparison of the top credit card reward programs.

3

Rack up MyPoints. I’ve been a member of mypoints. com for many years and have earned gift cards not only by reading e-mails, but also by sometimes patronizing certain merchants. I’m quickly working toward saving up 10,000 MyPoints,

A love poem is free and goes a long way in my house. which will equal $50 cash in my PayPal account. The bonus is that I use my credit card to purchase gifts I would have bought anyway, so I double my holiday earning power.

4

Make it yourself. Gifts in a jar (tipjunkie.com/ jar-homemade-gifts), such as cookie, cake, pie, and drink mixes, and other homemade treats, always go over well, and they are

November 2019 www.sonomafamilylife.com

sonoma cheap to make. Put them in reusable containers, and you’ve gone green, as well.

5

Give up on trying to impress. Sure, the mailman would dig a $100 gift card to a local restaurant, and your sitter would love a $100 iTunes card, but you probably can’t afford

magazine • web • email

#1 local resource for local families

LOCAL for 25 years

Do what you can, and let people appreciate you for who you are. either or you wouldn’t be reading this article. Do what you can, and let people appreciate you for who you are.

6

Sell stuff. Getting rid of clutter not only makes you money, it also makes room for incoming holiday gifts. Sell books, toys, clothes, movies, music, and more at consignment shops or on craigslist. com, or, if you’re really feeling industrious, throw a garage sale.

7

Buy nothing. To stay out of debt, consider not buying a gift for your spouse.

Instead let him or her know you want nothing but to live a debt-free life full of security and hope for the future. If you just can’t leave gift giving behind, it can be a fun to find something for each other on a $10 budget. A love poem is free and goes a long way in my house. ¶ Kerrie McLoughlin blogs at thekerrieshow.com about her roller-coaster-ride life homeschooling five kids.

www.sonomafamilylife.com

November 2019

SonomaFamilyLife 19

the way home, whoever ran to the park drives the kids home, while the other parent runs home solo.

Katie and Daniel Westreich, parents of two, take the concept a step further.

Every week, they grant each other an entire day off from parental duties of any kind, including even seeing their two children. Katie jokes they have trademarked the arrangement, “Twenty percent divorced.”

The Glory of Routines 6 Time-Saving Hacks for Parents

By Pam Moore

I

spent my childhood longing for the sweet freedom of adulthood. Now that I have it, I find I’m actually happier when my choices are limited. And it turns out I’m not alone. According to psychologist Barry Schwartz, less is more when it comes to options, which he explains in his TED Talk, “The Paradox of Choice.” Science shows people tend to be happier when they have fewer choices.

Enter routines. By creating “rules” for what, how, and when we are going to do things, routines limit or even eliminate the pesky choices that drain our time and energy. Here are some strategies you can use to minimize decision-making and maximize time and energy for the important things.

1. Divide and conquer. My husband and I have a deal; until 7 a.m.

20 SonomaFamilyLife

every Tuesday and Thursday I am free to “sleep in” or work out while he gets our kids dressed and fed. Monday and Wednesdays, we switch roles. Kate Darby and Marc Neff, who are parents of two and avid runners, have a unique way of making sure they both get their miles in. On weekends, one parent drives the kids to the park and the other parent runs to meet them. On

2. Schedule all the things…

Savvy parents take the time to schedule all the things in advance.

Jessica Ziegler, the co-author of

I make a double batch just about every time I bake muffins or prep a meal in the slow cooker.

Science of Parenthood (She Writes Press, 2015), relies on phone alarms for everything. “One for Get The Kids Up, one for Ten-Minute Warning/Brush Your Teeth, one for GTFO.” What did we ever do before phone alarms with customizable labels?!

3. …and use a shared electronic calendar app to do it. My husband and I started using a shared Google calendar when our first child was born more than five years ago. My husband had been trying to bring me over to the dark (read: electronic) side for years, but as a paper-lover at heart, I wouldn’t budge—until we had a child and I had to make sure someone was watching our kid every time I went to work on a Saturday, worked out, or met a friend. Now, I’m never surprised when my husband “invites” me to

November 2019 www.sonomafamilylife.com

happy hours with men I don’t know, and he’s come to expect “invitations” to girls’ night.

Galit Breen, a mother of three and author of Kindness Wins (Gailt Breen, 2016), a guide for teaching your child to be kind online, has had her kids enter their own events on the family’s iCalendar since her two older kids were ten and eight.

4. Simplify your meals. Melissa Proia, a stay-at-home mom of three kids younger than six, has egg frittatas every morning for breakfast. Once a week, she mixes up nine eggs, a pound of ground turkey, and veggies, bakes them in a casserole dish, cuts and wraps them into nine squares. All she has to do is grab one and heat it up each morning. On Sundays, Sam

www.sonomafamilylife.com

Watts, a busy mom who juggles five part-time jobs, plans her family’s meals for the week, puts all the ingredients on her shopping list, and does her

What did we ever do before phone alarms with customizable labels?! weekly shopping. Amy Muller, a mom and full-time project manager, takes it a step further with a weekly dinner schedule featuring chicken Monday, taco Tuesday, and pizza Friday.

5. Batch process. Stay-at-home mom Meryl Hertz Junick does all her school-lunch prepping at once. This way, she says, “I just need to refresh the containers in the insulated totes each night (or morning).” I make a

November 2019

double batch when I bake or prep a meal in the slow cooker. Elyana Funk saves time by stockpiling birthday presents for the children’s friends.

6. Do it the night before.

Although I’m normally a procrastinator, when it comes to my mom game, I do as much as I can the night before. I make my kids’ lunches while I make dinner. Elyana Funk has her coffee pot prepped and ready to go before she goes to sleep. Brittany Bouchard makes getting her two girls dressed a breeze by putting entire outfits together on a hanger. Jess Allen, the fitness blogger at blondeponytail. com, even preps her kids’ breakfast the night before. ¶ This article was originally published on Motherly.

To get Pam Moore’s free guide to crushing Impostor Syndrome visit pam-moore.com.

SonomaFamilyLife 21

material that catches their interest and inspires them to read more.

Myth: Reading the same book over and over means your child is stuck.

Raise a Reader

Reality: We benefit from re-reading at every age. Babies and toddlers profit from hearing books read over and over (and over) as they begin to understand the meanings tied to the sounds and recognize cadences and familiarize themselves with the words.

Older children benefit emotionally

Debunking 6 Myths about Childhood Reading

By Maria Russo and Pamela Paul

M

yth: Reading aloud to my child is the most important factor in making sure they grow up to be a strong reader.

Reality: Reading to your child is incredibly important, for all kinds of reasons. But recent studies show that having lots of books in the home is just as important. A child who’s surrounded by books is very likely to grow up to be a reader. If the adults in the home are reading their own books and enjoying them, too, all the better.

Myth: The earlier a child learns to read independently, the better a reader he or she will be for life.

22 SonomaFamilyLife

Approach reading as a pleasure delivery system, and you’re more likely to be successful.

Reality: The age your child learns to read is not actually related to future reading skills or overall cognitive ability. Every kid learns to read on a highly personal schedule.

That’s why in many European countries, reading instruction doesn’t even begin until age 7 or 8 as many children’s brains—and especially boys’—are not ready for decoding (an essential part of reading) until then.

Often, the best and most voracious readers start reading later, when they can comprehend more sophisticated

Picture books should stay in the picture all through childhood—and beyond. and cognitively from re-reading and revisiting their “comfort books.” And often deeper themes will only make themselves known after a second reading. This is true of adults as well; many like to read a book or see a movie a second or third time, not only to enjoy it again, but also to appreciate it more.

Myth: When their children enter preschool, parents should teach them to read, then help them progress year by year.

Reality: School is where children learn to read. Home is where children learn to love to read. It’s not a parent’s job to teach their child to read. Rather than asking, “When will she start reading?” or “What reading level is she on?” parents should instead ask “How can I help her to want to read?,” “What books will he truly enjoy?” and “How can we as a family enjoy reading together?” Prodding and pressuring a child whose brain is

November 2019 www.sonomafamilylife.com

not ready to read is not only futile, but also it can create negative associations around books. Approach reading as a pleasure-delivery system, and you’re more likely to be successful.

meant for ages 10 and older. Parents don’t need to push Harry Potter in any way or prove that their child is “old enough” for Harry. Let children get to Harry Potter on their own.

School is where children learn to read. Home is where children learn to love to read.

Myth: I can’t wait to read Harry Potter to my child!

Reality: Harry Potter is fantastic.

But there’s no reason to rush to these books; children will get to them when they are ready. The first Harry Potter book was written for ages 8–12. The later books are

Myth: Once they’re independently reading chapter books, it’s time to move on from picture books.

Reality: Picture books are works of art and are perfect vehicles to deliver rich storytelling. Just as a parent would want their child to appreciate the artwork in museums, they can invite them to embark on a lifetime of appreciating art in books.

Picture books should stay in the picture all through childhood—and beyond. And once a child begins to read independently, parents should still hold on to illustrated books of

all kinds, including graphic novels, which are increasingly popular for many reasons, not the least of which is that they are one of the best ways to teach a reluctant reader (or any reader) how to appreciate a story.

And remember: coffee table books are picture books for people of all ages. ¶ Maria Russo and Pamela Paul are the authors of How to Raise a Reader (Workman, 2019).

Russo is the children’s books editor of the New York Times Book Review.

Find her on Twitter at @mariarussonyt.

Paul is the editor of the New York Times Book Review and oversees books coverage at the New York Times, which she joined in 2011 as the children’s books editor. You can find her on Twitter at @PamelaPaulNYT and on her website pamelapaul.com.

The Art of Academic Excellence Twin Hills Middle School 6-8 Homeschool online curriculum

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We offer a challenging high school prep environment.

Five day a week partial-day program Socialization and hands-on activities at the resource center Support from a CA credentialed teacher Safe, small learning environment

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November 2019

700 Watertrough Rd. Sebastopol, CA, 707.823.6278 twinhillsusd.org

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SonomaFamilyLife 23

November Calendar of Events

Hike It Off

I

t’s a tradition to overindulge during the holidays, especially on Thanksgiving. To ward off extra pounds, there’s always that old standby, working out. The Opt Outside Turkey Burner offers an opportunity to get the heart pumping, outdoors, hiking five miles and 1,100 feet up Taylor Mountain. Walkers will be rewarded with panoramic views at the top, and may even build up an appetite for more pie. The event will be held on November 29, 9–11 a.m. Participants are asked to meet at the 2080 Kawana Terrace entrance of Taylor Mountain Regional Park, in Santa Rosa. The hike is free; parking is $7. Go to parks.sonomacounty.ca.gov for more information. ¶

Friday 1

Opt Outside Turkey Burner

Saturday 2

Disney’s The Lion King Kids.

Children’s theater. $5. Nov. 1 & 8: 7 p.m. Nov. 2 & 9: 1 & 3:30 p.m. Nov. 3 & 10: 3 p.m. Steele Lane Community Center. 415 Steele Ln., Santa Rosa. atheaterforchildren.com.

Pumpkin Nights. $16–$20. Ages 3 &

younger: free. Family pack (2 adults + 2 little ones): $65. Parking: $10 (cash only). 5:30–10:30 p.m. Runs thru Nov. 3. Sonoma County Fairgrounds.

1350 Bennett Valley Rd., Santa Rosa. pumpkinnights.com.

FREE Native STEM Makers Program. Kids ages 8–12 will

learn how to make “basket bots” & how to process hazelnuts. This class requires pre-registration at sonomacounty.libcal.com. 11 a.m.

Northwest Regional Library. 150 Coddingtown Center, Santa Rosa.

Other libraries will host this event.

See sonomacounty.libcal.com for branches/times.

FREE Salmon Creek Artwalk.

Local & guest artists will present

fine arts & crafts, from paintings & photography to leather goods & wood mounted clocks. Nov. 2–3. 10 a.m.–4 p.m. Salmon Creek. Bean Ave. & Marianna Dr., Bodega Bay. salmoncreekartwalk.com.

FREE Penngrove Market Art & Craft Fair. 10 a.m.–6 p.m. 10070

Main St., Penngrove. facebook.com/ penngrovemarket.

FREE Holiday Craft Fair. 9 a.m.–4 p.m. Citrus Fairgrounds & Veterans Memorial Building. 1 Citrus Fair Dr., Cloverdale. cloverdalecitrusfair.org.

THE 45TH ANNUAL

WINTER SESSION

90

DECEMBER 7, 9AM-5PM DECEMBER 8, 10AM-4PM Finley Community Center, 2060 W. College Ave. A $3 admission fee gets you in all weekend! srcity.org/craftsfair 24 SonomaFamilyLife

NOW ENROLLING Musical Theatre, Improvisation, Acting, Juggling & Circus Classes Call (707) 523-4185 Today! www.6thstreetplayhouse.com

November 2019 www.sonomafamilylife.com

FREE Healdsburg Holiday Arts & Crafts Market. Saturdays. 8:30 a.m.–

noon. Runs thru Nov. 30. Farmers’ Market. North & Vine Streets, Healdsburg. healdsburgfarmers market.org.

Dia De Los Muertos Procession with Giant Puppets. Food, art,

mariachi, Los Diablos band, Ballet Folklorico of Petaluma Paquiyollotin, music, performance & folkloric dance.

Participants are encouraged to paint their faces in Dia De Los Muertos skeleton-style. Bring a candle. 4–10 p.m. Sonoma-Marin Fairgrounds.

175 Fairgrounds Dr., Petaluma. visitpetaluma.com.

Fundemonium Fall Train Show. Nov. 2 & 3. 10 a.m.–4 p.m. Fundemonium.

579 Rohnert Park Expressway W., Rohnert Park. fundemoniumtoys.com.

Sunday 3

refreshments. 5:30–9 p.m. Sebastopol Regional Library. 7140 Bodega Ave., Sebastopol. sonomacounty.libcal.com.

Thursday 7 8th Annual Dancing with the Stars at the Raven. Local celebrity “stars”

& dance pros compete for audience votes. Preview Performance on Nov. 7, 7:30 p.m.: $20. $10 for 18 & younger. Nov. 9, $35–$45. Raven

Performing Arts Theater. 115 North St., Healdsburg. raventheater.org.

Friday 8 FREE Go Big & Play On! Play oversized versions of Jenga, Connect 4, checkers & more. Ages 5–17. 4–5 p.m. Healdsburg Regional Library. 139 Piper St., Healdsburg. Other libraries will host this event. See sonomacounty. libcal.com for branches/times.

Santa Photos All Season Long!

FREE Honoring Their Service: Women Veterans Sharing Stories.

Hear stories from 6 women veterans whose service spans the decades, from World War II through the present conflict. 3–5 p.m. Central Santa Rosa Library. 211 E St., Santa Rosa. sonomacounty.libcal.com.

Santa Rosa Doll & Toy Show & Sale.

Antique, vintage, modern & miniature dolls. $6. Ages 12 & younger: free when accompanied by adult. Proceeds help the Living Room, a women’s & children’s day shelter. 10 a.m.–3:30 p.m. Santa Rosa Veterans Building.

1351 Maple Ave., Santa Rosa. 326-0322. santarosadollshow.blogspot.com.

SRMC Holiday Wreath-Making Event. Hosted by the Santa Rosa

Mother’s Club. Moms only. Members: $10. Non-members: $30. 9:30–11:30 a.m. 5274 Wikiup Ct., Santa Rosa.

Register: srmc46.wildapricot.org.

Monday 4 FREE Santa Rosa Symphony/ Young People’s Chamber Orchestra. Light

www.sonomafamilylife.com

Santa arrives Nov. 16 & will be here all day every day (except Thanksgiving) through Christmas Eve.

Visit our Facebook page for Santa Photo Hours 733 Coddingtown Center, Santa Rosa 527-5378 www.Coddingtown.Shop November 2019

SonomaFamilyLife 25

FREE Dads Café. For dads & other

males who play a supportive role in the life of a child. 6–8 p.m. Abraham Lincoln Elementary School. Room 502. 850 W. 9th St., Santa Rosa. facebook.com/pg/calparents.

9th Annual Champions for Children Recognition Luncheon. Fundraiser

for 4Cs Sonoma County, a nonprofit dedicated to creating accessible, local childcare & preschool programs. $50.

11:30 a.m.–1:30 p.m. Santa Rosa Golf & Country Club. 333 Country Club Dr., Santa Rosa. tinyurl.com/y62ymu62.

FREE Santa Rosa Mother’s Club Thanksgiving Celebration. Members

only. 4–7 p.m. 5274 Wikiup Ct., Santa Rosa. Register &/or join club: srmc46. wildapricot.org.

Get Crafty

S

hopping local is good for the local economy. And during the holidays, craft fairs are ubiquitous purveyors of unique, locally made items. Here are just some of the free fairs that are slated for November. (See our Calendar of Events, page 24, for more).

19th Annual West County Craft Faire. More than 40 North Bay crafters will offer their goods on November 23 and 24, 11 a.m.–4 p.m., at the Sebastopol Grange Hall in Sebastopol. sebastopolgrange.org.

40th Annual Holiday Arts & Crafts Faire. Get shopping done while kids attend the Little Elves’ Workshop on November 29 and 30, 10 a.m.–4 p.m., at the Rohnert Park Community Center in Rohnert Park. facebook.com/ events/540377170060563.

Healdsburg Holiday Arts and Crafts Market. On Saturdays, 8:30 a.m.–noon, in November, a third aisle dedicated to crafts will be set up at the farmers’ market, on North and Vine Streets, in Healdsburg. healdsburgfarmersmarket.org.

Holiday Craft Fair. More than 50 artisans will be selling everything from tree ornaments and knitted hats to jewelry and aprons on November 2, 9 a.m.– 4p.m., at Cloverdale Citrus Fairgrounds in Cloverdale. cloverdalecitrusfair.org.

Penngrove Market Art and Craft Fair. In its second year, this fair will be held on November 2, 10 a.m.–6 p.m., at Penngrove Market, on Main Street, in Penngrove. facebook.com/penngrovemarket.

Salmon Creek Artwalk. At this beachfront art sale, 14 local and guest artists will present fine arts and crafts—from paintings and photography to leather goods and wood mounted clocks—on November 2 and 3, 10 a.m.–4 p.m., at Salmon Creek (Bean Avenue and Marianna Drive) in Bodega Bay. salmoncreekartwalk.com. ¶

26 SonomaFamilyLife

Saturday 9 FREE Traditional Ecological Knowledge for Kids. Learn the art

of basket-making from an educator from the California Indian Museum & Cultural Center. Ages 7 & older.

11 a.m.–noon: Healdsburg Library, 139 Piper St., Healdsburg. 2–3 p.m.: Sebastopol Library, 7140 Bodega Ave., Sebastopol. Pre-registration required.

Healdsburg Library: sonomacounty. libcal.com/event/5748485. Sebastopol Library: sonomacounty.libcal.com/ event/5748486.

Sacred Art Paint Party. Learn how

to paint a rendering of Saint Elizabeth Ann Seton using acrylic paints on canvas. No experience necessary. $50 donation includes all materials. 1–4 p.m. St. Elizabeth Ann Seton Catholic Church. 4595 Snyder Ln., Rohnert Park. 585-3708.

FREE Celebrate Native American Heritage Month. Meet, watch & talk

with Merisha Sequoia Clark, who published the Illustrated children’s book, The Cloud Artist. Kids will

November 2019 www.sonomafamilylife.com

create a cloud craft. Ages 4–10.

10–11 a.m. Rincon Valley Library.

6959 Montecito Blvd., Santa Rosa. sonomacounty.libcal.com.

FREE Bike Trail Spic & Span. Help keep bike trails clean while learning about the local watershed. 9 a.m.– noon. Santa Rosa Creek Trail. 782 Willowside Rd., Santa Rosa. Register: sonomacountyparks.ticketleap.com.

Abracadabra! Event included in price of admission ($5–$12 or free for ages 3 & younger). 3 p.m. Charles M. Schulz Museum. 2301 Hardies Ln., Santa Rosa. schulzmuseum.org.

FREE Sonoma County Healers Network Healing Sanctuary. Get

free sessions from various holistic practitioners. Offerings vary but may

include massage, hypnotherapy, sound therapy, meditation, Reiki, Tarot readings & dream interpretation.

Second Sunday of the month. 1–4 p.m. Arlene Francis Center. 99 6th St., Santa Rosa.

FREE Patchwork Show. 100+

local makers. DIY crafting & special activities. 11 a.m.–5 p.m.

Speakeasy on the Barbary Coast Fundraiser. Live & silent auctions,

dinner, dancing & live music. $150.

Shuttle from/to Cloverdale Plaza: $30. Benefits Cloverdale Arts Alliance Gallery. 5–9:30 p.m. The Ranch at Lake Sonoma. Marina Rd., Lot A, Geyserville. 894-8500. cloverdaleartsalliance.ejoinme.org.

FREE Holiday Art Fest.

One-of-a-kind works of handmade art, vintage & antique. 10 a.m.–4 p.m.

Hermann Sons Hall. 860 Western Ave., Petaluma. visitpetaluma.com.

FREE 2nd Annual Community Health Fair. Health screenings,

diet & nutrition education, chair massage, fitness demos & up to 1.5 hours of free childcare. Open to the public. 8:30–11:30 a.m. YMCA. 1111 College Ave., Santa Rosa. 545-9622. scfymca.org.

ArtJam: Origami. Learn the art &

history of origami with artist Henry Kaku. Event included in price of admission ($9–$12 or free for 12 months & younger. EBT cardholders with ID get in for $2). 1–3 p.m.

Children’s Museum of Sonoma County. 1835 W. Steele Ln., Santa Rosa. cmosc.org.

Sunday 10 The Magic with Patrick Martin.

Sleight-of-hand magician performs a comedic stage show. Presented in conjunction with the exhibition www.sonomafamilylife.com

November 2019

SonomaFamilyLife 27

Sonoma County Fairgrounds. 1350 Bennett Valley Rd., Santa Rosa. dearhandmadelife.com.

Monday 11 FREE Veterans Day at the Museum.

Enjoy free Museum admission all day in honor of the service of Charles M. Schulz & others. 10 a.m.–5 p.m. Charles M. Schulz Museum.

2301 Hardies Ln., Santa Rosa. schulzmuseum.org.

FREE Veterans Day Parade & Flyover. Entertainment: noon.

Parade: 1 p.m. Parade begin & ends at Walnut Park, Petaluma. petalumaveteransparade.com.

Tuesday 12 Teen Nature Photography Series.

Learn basic photography skills through engaging activities. Bring

own camera or borrow one from instructor. Ages 13–18 only. Event: $5. Parking: $7. 3:30–5 p.m.

Registration required: tinyurl.com/ yy3efuv7. Ragle Ranch Regional Park. 500 Ragle Rd., Sebastopol.

565-2041. sonomacounty.ca.gov.

Bark After Dark. Dinner & auction.

$35–$45. Proceeds support the Animal Shelter League. 6:30–10 p.m.

Rohnert Park Community Center.

5401 Synder Ln., Rohnert Park. animalshelterleaguerp.org.

Oliver! $22–$38. Thursdays–Sundays.

Shows at 2 & 7:30 p.m., depending on the day. Runs thru Dec. 15. 6th Street Playhouse. 52 W. 6th St., Santa Rosa.

6thstreetplayhouse.com.

Friday 15 Santa Photo Time. Activities & photos. Nov. 15–Dec. 20. 11 a.m.–7 p.m. Santa Rosa Plaza. 1070 Santa Rosa Plaza, Santa Rosa. To reserve a date & time for photo with Santa, visit simon.com/santa.

Joseph & the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. Presented by Cinnabar

Thursday 14 FREE Holidays Along the Farm Trails. Farm tours, handmade gifts,

workshops & tastings. Most stops are free. No pets. Begins Nov. 14. Runs weekends thru Jan. 1, 2020. Various locations in Sonoma County. More info at farmtrails.org.

Young Rep. $8–$20. Fridays & Saturdays: 7:30 p.m. Sundays: 2 p.m.

Runs thru Dec. 1. Cinnabar Theater.

3333 Petaluma Blvd N., Petaluma. cinnabartheater.com.

GIVE THANKS FOR HEALTHY LIVING

Join Our Community

2ND ANNUAL COMMUNITY HEALTH FAIR

Apple Blossom Elementary School

Our mission is to nurture our students’ creative and critical thinking, academic proficiency, global awareness, appreciation for diversity and respect for themselves and others in a continually changing technological world.

Grade levels: K-5 • Small class sizes: K-3 (18-20), 4-6 (24-26) Interactive, project-based learning • On-site pre-school Before and after-school care ART, MUSIC, GARDENING, SCIENCE, TECHNOLOGY & PHYSICAL EDUCATION

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28 SonomaFamilyLife

700 Watertrough Rd. Sebastopol, CA, 707.823.6278 twinhillsusd.org

Saturday, November 9th 8:30am-11:30am YMCA Activity Center Free & Open to the Public

Health Screenings, Mental Health Resources, Chair Massage, Fitness Demos, Community Resources, Healthy Snacks, Free Childcare (up to 1.5 hours), and more!

THANKSGIVING BREAK CAMP

November 25-27, 2019 7:00am-6:00pm Ages 6-12 $55 per day Jack London, Yulupa, Monte Vista, Grant & Prestwood sites Call 707-544-1829 for more information or to register *Space is limited-register early!

Sonoma County Family Y  1111 College Avenue  Santa Rosa 707-545-9622  www.scfymca.org The Y is a non-profit community based organization.

November 2019 www.sonomafamilylife.com

Saturday 16 FREE French Storytime. French songs & stories. Viens nous rejoindre pour écouter des histoires, des contes et des chansons en français. Ages 0–5. 10:15–10:45 a.m. Central Santa Rosa Library. 211 E St., Santa Rosa. sonomacounty.libcal.com.

Santa Photo Hours. Take

pictures with Santa this year. Nov. 16, 23 & 30: 10 a.m.–7 p.m. Nov. 17, 27 & 24: noon–5 p.m. Nov. 18–22 & Nov. 25, 26 & 28: noon–7 p.m. Runs thru Dec. 24. Coddingtown Mail. 733 Coddingtown Center, Santa Rosa. coddingtown.shop.

Thanksgiving Feast with Snoopy.

Help prepare a re-creation of Snoopy’s Thanksgiving meal of toast, popcorn & jelly beans, topped off with a Cold Stone ice cream dessert. Hands-on

crafts & other activities. Event included in price of admission. ($5–$12 or free for ages 3 & younger).

1–4 p.m. Charles M. Schulz Museum.

2301 Hardies Ln., Santa Rosa.

579-4452. schulzmuseum.org.

Sunday 17

The Pout-Pout Fish. Clover Sonoma Family Fun Series. $12–$17. $5 lap passes available on day of show for ages 2 & younger. 3 p.m.

Luther Burbank Center. 50 Mark West Springs Rd., Santa Rosa. lutherburbankcenter.org.

Tuesday 19

Brick Palooza. A huge exhibition

of Lego art, play areas & hands-on activity booths. $12–$60. Ages 4 & younger: free. 10 a.m.–5 p.m. Santa Rosa Veterans Building. 1351 Maple Ave., Santa Rosa. thebrickhutt.com.

Great Composers Revisited.

Performed by the Santa Rosa Symphony Youth Orchestra. $5–$20.

3 p.m. Green Music Center. 1801 E. Cotati Ave., Rohnert Park. srsymphony.org.

GIVE THE GIFT OF RIDING LESSONS THIS HOLIDAY SEASON!

• Gift certificates available.

• Year round riding lessons 7 days per week for riders age 5 & up.

FREE Teens Cook at the Library.

Learn how to make veggie nori rolls & a blueberry smoothie. Ages 13–17.

3:30–4:30 p.m. Northwest Santa Rosa Library. 150 Coddingtown Center, Santa Rosa. Registration required: sonomacounty.libcal.com/ event/5702003.

Thursday 21 100th Anniversary of the Harlem Renaissance. Multi-media show

featuring the music of Fats Waller,

Building Confidence to last a lifetime!

Call today to get $100 off any new enrollment

• Handling & caring for horses.

• Horse safety & proper grooming.

• 2 lovely indoor arenas for riding on wet winter days.

100 Lynch Road • Petaluma 707-799-5054 • www.stridesridingacademy.com

www.sonomafamilylife.com

November 2019

SonomaFamilyLife 29

Duke Ellington, Billie Holiday, Bessie Smith & Ethel Waters. 9-piece band with 3 dancers. $25–$55. 7:30 p.m.

Green Music Center. 1801 E. Cotati Ave., Rohnert Park. gmc.sonoma.edu.

Friday 22 FREE Gifts ’n Tyme Holiday Craft Fair. Highlighting 85 local & regional

artists. Nov. 22 & 23: 10 a.m.–6 p.m. Nov. 24: 10 a.m.–4 p.m. Napa Valley Expo. 575 Third St., Napa. napavalleyexpo.com.

Miss Bennet: Christmas at Pemberley. For all ages. $10–$24.

Nov. 22, 23, 29 & 30: 7:30 p.m. Runs thru Dec. 15. Spreckels Performing Arts Center. 5409 Snyder Ln., Rohnert Park. spreckelsonline.com.

Saturday 23 Santa & Mrs. Claus. The Christmas

couple will be in their photo

We Grow Them★

REDWOOD STRONG!

studio every weekend thru Dec. 22.

Saturdays & Sundays. 11 a.m.–3 p.m.

Montgomery Village. 911 Village Ct., Santa Rosa. mvshops.com.

FREE West County Craft Faire. Nov.

23 & 24. 11 a.m.–4 p.m. Sebastopol Grange. 6000 Sebastopol Ave., Sebastopol. sebastopolgrange.org.

Sunday 24 FREE Giving Thanks at the Homestead. Family-friendly tours

of working homestead. Learn about farm animals, brush-chipping & wood-splitting. Food & music. Starts at 2 p.m. sharp. Artful Arrangements.

205 Orchard Ln., Petaluma. artfularrangements.org.

Tuesday 26 FREE Raptors All Around Us! A presentation with live birds by the Bird Rescue Center. Ages 5 & older. 2–2:30 p.m. Windsor Regional Library. 9291 Old Redwood Hwy. #100, Windsor.

838-1020. sonomacounty.libcal.com.

Wednesday 27 FREE The Great Thanksgiving Banquet. Outreach to homeless

& low-income families. Free hot turkey dinner, haircuts, warm coats

Classes for all ages

★reg

Birthday Parties!

FREE infant and parent classes

FALL & WINTER DAY CAMPS

★reg

ages 4–12

since 1979

Redwood Empire Gymnastics

www.regymnastics.com 707.763.5010

30 SonomaFamilyLife

& medical evaluations, family food bags & games. Sponsored by the Redwood Gospel Mission. 11 a.m.–7 p.m. Sonoma County Fairgrounds.

1350 Bennett Valley Rd., Santa Rosa. srmission.org.

Friday 29 FREE Opt Outside Turkey Burner.

Burn off that Thanksgiving feast hiking a mountain. This 5-mile moderately strenuous hike will go up 1,100 vertical feet & offer panoramic views. Event: free. Parking: $7. 9–11 a.m. Taylor Mountain Regional Park.

2080 Kawana Terrace, Santa Rosa.

565-3080. sonomacounty.ca.gov.

Magical Christmas Train. Featuring Santa, festive treats, reindeer games & sing-alongs. 90-minute round-trip. $10.95–$49.95. 10:30 a.m. & 1 & 3:30 p.m. departures from Willits. (Fort Bragg departures added in Dec.) Runs thru Dec. 23. 299 E. Commercial St., Willits. skunktrain.com.

Family Fun Weekend. Cartoonist & storyteller Joe Wos will give live performances & cartoon workshops.

10 a.m.–5 p.m. $5–$12. Ages 3 & younger: free. Charles M. Schulz Museum. 2301 Hardies Ln., Santa Rosa. schulzmuseum.org.

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Cirque de Bohème. “A Paris,” Circus Holiday Spectacle.

$27–$55. Fridays–Sundays. 1, 3 & 5 p.m., depending on the day. Runs thru Dec. 22. CornerStone Sonoma. 23570 Hwy. 121, Sonoma. cirquedeboheme2019.bpt.me.

FREE 40th Annual Holiday Arts & Crafts Faire. Thru Nov. 30. 10 a.m.–4 p.m. Rohnert Park Community Center. 5401 Synder Ln., Rohnert Park. facebook.com/ rpcommunityservices.

Saturday 30 Ukiah on Ice: Holiday Ice Skating Rink. $10 skate session, includes skates. Daily thru Jan. 5, 2020. Next to Alex Thomas Plaza, on School Street. Schedule at cityofukiah. com/ukiah-on-ice.

FREE Santa’s River Boat Arrival. Live entertainment with Petaluma’s School of Ballet dancers wearing Nutcracker costumes will welcome the Christmas couple. Photos with Santa. 11:30 a.m.–1:30 p.m. River Plaza Shopping Center. 50 E. Washington St., Petaluma. visitpetaluma.com.

FREE Annual Tree Lighting Ceremony. 5:30–7:30 p.m. Theater Square. 151 Petaluma Blvd., Petaluma. visitpetaluma.com.

SACRED ART PAINT PARTY SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 9, 1–4 pm

Artist Monika Barrack will teach you how to paint, step by step, with acrylic paint on canvas.

There is no such thing as “just playing” that is how I learn!

Paint your own interpretation of St. Elizabeth Ann Seton with the Marian Sisters of the Diocese of Santa Rosa.

No experience is necessary.

We are excited to introduce our new preschool to Cotati/Rohnert Park Area.

To celebrate our first year in business, during the months of November through December we are offering one week free tuition for part time and fulltime enrollments.

Our program is Reggio based with Emergent Curriculum as its root of learning. Our main focus and priority is social emotional growth of the individual child.

$50 Donation and includes all materials.

REFRESHMENTS WILL BE AVAILABLE TO PURCHASE

ST. ELIZABETH ANN SETON CATHOLIC CHURCH

Play as You Learn PRESCHOOL

We offer a safe learning environment with inside and outside classroom spaces. Our school offers a wide variety of schedules as well as a drop in schedule to meet all needs for families.

www.playasyoulearnpreschool.com (707) 206-5392

4595 Snyder Lane, Rohnert Park 707-585-3708 | bedokaparties@yahoo.com

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November 2019

SonomaFamilyLife 31

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2427 Professional Dr. • Santa Rosa Near Steele Lane & Hwy 101

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Schools NEW 2019 CIRCUS HOLIDAY SPECTACLE An Old Style Circus Based On The French Tradition Of The 1920’S

NOVEMBER: 29 & 30 DECEMBER: 1, 7, 8, 14, 15, 21 & 22 SHOWS DAILY: 1PM, 3PM, 5PM CORNERSTONE SONOMA 23570 ARNOLD DR. SONOMA WWW.CIRQUEDEBOHEME.COM

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SonomaFamilyLife 33

Humor Break arm. Once she’s seated at the table with a pile of neon orange noodles in front of her, though, she will eat like it’s her last supper.

How Loud Are They Whining?

Gratitude Is a Matter of Perspective

Be grateful for: Your kid’s ability to be fully present in each moment.

She’s not checking her texts or her social media notifications. She’s really living, man.

By Pam Moore When parents think of the things we’re grateful for, our kids generally make the top of the list. That said, when your when you notice the “creative” way in which they’ve taken a ballpoint pen to the couch cushions… that river of gratitude suddenly dries right up.

With Thanksgiving approaching, I thought it might be helpful to “reframe” the way we view our kids’ shenanigans: Your kid is asking you for a snack. You tell her she’s going to have to wait a minute; you’re in the middle of something. She responds by telling you exactly what kind of snack she’d like. “I need Goldfish,” she informs you. She continues. “The cheddar kind. And they need to be in the purple ramekin.” You thought you had a five-year-old, not a rock star with a mile-long event rider. You look at her and say, “What would be a nicer way to ask?” with a syrupy-sweet voice.

Matching your saccharine request, 34 SonomaFamilyLife

she complies, asking, “Can I please have cheddar Goldfish in the purple ramekin? And also I want more than my sister. Please.”

Be grateful for: Your child’s ability to know what she wants. This child will not need you to call her professor or landlord on her behalf 20 years from now.

You’re ready to leave the park.

Your child is not. She’s creating a castle out of gravel using the shoe you specifically told her not to take off her foot. As you approach her, you notice the wild look in her eye. She is hungry.

The smell of a meltdown is in the air.

“Let’s go!” you say. “NOOOOO!” she says. You offer macaroni and cheese for lunch. She glances up for a fraction of a second then goes back to her task.

In about seven minutes you will be carry-dragging her to the car with her shoe tucked awkwardly under your

“You should be ready for school in five minutes,” you announce. Your child says she is ready. She’s in a floral tank top, a tutu, and leopard print leggings. It is snowing. She has on non-matching socks and her sparkly Velcro sneakers.

“But…” you stop before you complete the sentence because you don’t know how to say “You look homeless” nicely.

“Sweetheart, it’s November. How about a long sleeve on top of that tank top?” is the best thing you can come up with.

After all, she is fully dressed. She’s wearing sneakers on P.E. day. Her teeth are brushed. The bus is coming in 10 minutes. There’s no time for a visit from the fashion police. “Do you feel good in that outfit?” you ask. She nods, beaming.

Be grateful for: The fact that your kid thinks for herself. If she knows what the other kids are wearing, she clearly does not care.

There is always something to be grateful for if you look hard enough.

As parents, it’s important to remember that how you view a situation depends on where you stand (and of course how loudly your kid is whining).

This article was originally published on Mazel Together.

Find Pam Moore’s free guide to crushing Impostor Syndrome at pam-moore.com.

November 2019 www.sonomafamilylife.com

Santa and Mrs. Claus Beginning Saturday, November 23, Santa and Mrs. Claus will be in their Photo Studio in Village Terrace every weekend from 11am to 3pm. All proceeds benefit the Volunteer Center of Sonoma County.

The Holiday Stroll Sunday, December 1 Festive holiday entertainment that includes music, merriment and more! Plus special holiday treats and discounts at over 30 participating stores. It’s sure to put you in a holiday mood.

Visit www.mvshops.com for event details.

Light Up A Life Thursday, December 5 • 5pm to 6:30pm Please join us at Santa’s Village in Village Terrace for the Heartland Hospice Tree Lighting Ceremony and help to light up lives, cherish memories and celebrate our community.

The Secret Santa Marathon Wednesday, December 18 While wrapping up your holiday shopping and enjoying the strolling entertainment, help us fulfill every last Secret Santa wish from our neighbors in need. For more information about Secret Santa, call 707.573.3399.

Chanukah Festival Sunday, December 22 • 4 pm in Village Court The Chabad Jewish Center invites you to Celebrate Chanukah.

Join us for a Menorah Lighting Celebration.

Enjoy hot latkes, music, dreidels, gelt, prizes and more.

For information, call 707.577.0277.

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