The Olive Press Catalunya magazine July 2012 issue 50

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July 2012 issue 50

CATALUNYA


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Welcome to the July edition of “The Olive Press ” Now each month for 4 years without a miss.

Please note our New Web Site www.the-olive-press.com E-mail info@the-olive-press.com

We are now a truly Catalan magazine with distribution from Vinaros in the south To Roses In the north.

IF YOU WANT TO REACH EXPATS IN CATALUNYA…NO BETTER WAY. Perfect Advertising for Solar power Suppliers, independent Financial Advisors, Vets, Securit y, Architects S u r v e yor s , T r a n s l ator s , I n s u r a n c e A g e n t s , R e m o va l s , T r av e l a g e n t s , S t o r a g e , L aw y e r s , B u i l d e r s , D . I . Y, Plumbers, Car Repairs, Tax Advisors, Air Con, Heating, Computer, Printing, Broadband, Satellite TV, Mortgages and Loans, Estate Agents, Pool Supplies, Dentists, Doctors…etc…etc.

THE

Deadlines: Adverts 15th Articles: 12th of the month. No adverts or artwork in the Olive Press Catalunya magazine or web site may be reproduced or used for print, media or web in part or in their entirety without the express permission of the Olive Press Catalunya. Adverts. and logos remain the property of the magazine. To use any artwork please contact us. Contributors: Clodagh & Dick Handscombe Jeff Greensmith Stuffed Olive Designs

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I went to the cemetery yesterday to lay some flowers on a grave. A s I was standing there I noticed 4 grave diggers walking about with a coffin, 3 hours later and they're still walking about with it. I thought to myself, they've lost the plot .....

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LIVEContents PRESS What’s News-In Spain

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Culture

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Your Horoscope

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PC Tips

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Health 14 Can it be True? The Lighter Side

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Catalunyan Fiestas Property Update

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Gourmet Treat your taste buds

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Home & Garden

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Crossword Classifieds Business Card Directory

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HAIL CAESAR The most important change during caesars reign, was his reform of the calendar. The calendar at the time was regulated by the movement of the moon, and this had resulted in a great deal of disorder. Caesar replaced this calendar with the Egyptian calendar, which was regulated by the sun. He set the length of the year to 365.25 days by adding an intercalary/leap day at the end of February every fourth year.To bring the calendar into alignment with the seasons, he decreed that three extra months be inserted into 46 BC (the ordinary intercalary month at the end of February, and two extra months after November). Thus, the Julian calendar opened on 1 January 45 BC. And our contemporary calendar is still pretty much the same system that Caesar instituted more than 2000 years ago. You’ve probably figured out by now that July was named in honor of Julius, and it seems like a worthy tribute. This is especially true when you consider the drab name of the month under the older calendar system: Quintilis, which just means “fifth” in Latin. (Sort of like naming a fluffy dog Fluffy.) When Julius Caesar died, Quintilis (which was his birth month) was replaced with July

THIS IS THE ONLY TIME WE WILL SEE AND LIVE THIS EVENT Calendar for July 2012

July Sun Mon Tues Wed Thurs Fri Sat 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31

This year, July has 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays. This happens once every 823 years. This is called money bags. So, forward this to your friends and money will arrive within 4 days. Based on Chinese Feng Shui. The one who does not forward.....will be without money. The wife has been missing a week now. Police said to prepare for the worst. So I have been to the charity shop to get all her clothes back

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A Badajoz man wanted to show his friends a mushroom was not poisonous, and ended up in intensive care for two days José Manuel H i d a l g o refused to be taken to hospital until he started to turn yellow

news in spain Spain to shut down 30 airports

Thirty of Spain’s 47 state-run airports are set to be closed or partially closed as the nation struggles to curb expenses. Many of the airports are viewed as “white elephants” which were built during the boom years which saw much reckless state spending amidst exaggerated optimism. Some have never had a single plane land and have no flights scheduled but are staffed and operational. That in Castellon in the east was opened in March 2011 at an estimated cost of €150m but has never been used.

A 4 5 y e a r old man from Fuentes de León in Badajoz, José Manuel Hidalgo, ate some mushrooms to show they were not poisonous, and ended up in intensive care. It happened last Sunday during an open day being held in the village, which had been proceeded by a day of mushroom collecting and display. The victim got into an argument with other locals as to how lethal wild mushrooms could be, with a poster warning that as little as 20 grams could be fatal. José Manuel did not believe it, and suddenly to prove his point, started to eat the ‘amanita phalloides’ mushroom. On the second bite he showed symptoms of being drunk, and continued to claim the mushroom was not fatal.

Among the wo rst p erfo rmer s ar e Badajoz airport, near the Portuguese border in western Spain, which saw its last commercial flight take-off in January. Huesca, billed as “the gateway to the Pyrenees”, saw just 2,781 passengers arrive during all of 2011, nearly all of them during the ski season. Despite this, the airport is fully staffed year round, including a number of restaurants.

An ambulance was called but it took considerable argument before the patient finally agreed to be taken to hospital in Zafra, Badajoz. By this time he had turned yellow and started to vomit.

In all, there are 20 airports that handle fewer than 100,000 passengers a year, well below the estimated half a million they need to be profitable.

SPANISH JOKES Throughout the magazine this month we are featuring some Spanish jokes. You'll find them in orange boxes. Each joke includes an English translation after each Spanish sentence. You will probably learn more Spanish, though, by not scrolling down to the translation until you have done your best to translate yourself. Un policía detiene a un transeúnte y le dice: A policeman detains a transient and says to him: - A ver, usted, deme el nombre. "Let's see, you, give me your name." - ¡Sí, hombre! ¡Y entonces cómo me llamo? " Ye a h , r i g h t ! A n d t h e n w h a t w o u l d I c a l l myself?!"

Now the ministry of industry and AENA, the state-run company that controls the nation's airports, are considering plans to reduce operating hours at three quarters of the airports to include only those when flights are due or with a skeleton staff to operate in an emergency.

He spent two days in the intensive care unit, and finally was allowed out onto the ward amid concerns that his liver may have suffered permanent damage.

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For the stream as it rose, pushed its way up his nose, And blew him up like a balloon.

The Arc de Berà (sometimes written Barà) is a triumphal arch 20 km north of Tarragona close to Roda de Barà.

The monument is part of the Archaeological Ensemble of Tarraco, which was added to the UNESCO's list of World Heritage Sites in 2000. It stands on the line of what was the Via Augusta, now the N-340 .[1] Its name derives from the Count Berà. the first count of Barcelona who ruled from 801 until his removal in 820. It is a triumphal arch with a single opening consisting of a central body on a podium, decorated with fluted pilasters crowned by Corinthian capitals. [2] The upper part of the construction is an entablature ( the horizontal stone above the column) made up of architrave, frieze and cornice. The stone used is probably from a local quarry. It is the best instance of a monumental arch with one gate on Spain and the best known after Medinaceli The monument was the brainchild of Lucius Licinius Sura and it was erected in the reign of Augustus, around 13 BCE. It is thought it was dedicated to Augustus or to his genius, and that it marked the limit of the district of Tarraco. Another line of thought is that it marked the border between two native Iberian tribes the Ilergetes and the Casetaninas Main measures are 12 m. long and 2, 40 m. wide. Each pillar is 3,70 m. long at the main façades and 2,40 m. wide. Total height is 12,30 m.

The Ole in the Ark One evening at dusk as Noah stood on his Ark, Putting green oil in starboard side lamp, His wife came along and said, 'Noah, summat's wrong, Our cabin is getting quite damp. Noah said, 'Is that so?' Then he went down below, And found it were right what she'd said, For there on the floor quite a puddle he saw, It was slopping around under t' bed. Said he, 'There's an 'ole in the bottom somewhere, We must find it before we retire.' Then he thowt for a bit, and he said 'Aye, that's it, A bloodhound is what we require.' Se he went and fetched bloodhound from place where it lay, 'Tween the skunk and the polecat it were, And as things there below, were a trifle so-so, It were glad of a breath of fresh air. They followed the hound as it went sniffing round, 'Til at last they located the leak, 'Twere a small hole in the side, about two inches wide, Where a swordfish had poked in its beak. And by gum! how the wet squirted in through that hole, Well, young Shem who at sums was expert, Worked it out on his slate that it came at the rate, Of per gallon, per second, per squirt. The bloodhound tried hard to keep water in check, By lapping it up with his tongue, But it came in so fast through that hole, that at last, He shoved in his nose for a bung. The poor faithful hound, he were very near drowned, They dragged him away none too soon,

And then Mrs Noah shoved her elbow in t'hole, And said,' Eh! it's stopped I believe,' But they found very soon as she'd altered her tune, For the water had got up her sleeve. When she saw as her elbow weren't doing much good, She said to Noah, 'I've an idea, You sit on the leak and by t'end of the week, There's no knowing, the weather may clear.' Noah didn't think much to this notion, at all, But reckoned he'd give it a try, On the 'ole down he flopped, and the leaking all stopped, And all... except him, was quite dry. They took him his breakfast and dinner and tea, As day after day there he sat, 'Til the rain was all passed and they landed at last, On top side of Mount Ararat. And that is how Noah got them all safe ashore, But ever since then, strange to tell, Them as helped save the Ark has all carried a mark, Aye, and all their descendants as well. That's why dog has a cold nose, and ladies cold elbows, You'll also find if you enquire, That's why a man takes his coat tails in hand, And stands with his back to the fire. Marriott Edgar

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Books from Catalunya Books about Catalunya Nada by Carmen Laforet translated by Edith Grossman One of the great novels of 1940s Spain, Nada unfolds in post-Civil War Barcelona, when the city is cowed by the Franco dictatorship and Catholic respectability. Into this Catalan backwater comes Andrea, a small-town teenager who wants to study literature at the university. She is barely off the train, however, than she finds herself stranded in her grandmother's gloomy house. With its odour of moth balls and things locked away, the house is a microcosm of Franco's repressive, fear-ridden Spain. The novel describes Andrea's rite of passage from adolescence into the sexual perils and treacheries of the adult world. It is narrated by the 18-year-old herself in the form of a diary, and is clearly autobiographical. Carmen Laforet, born in Barcelona in 1921, was barely 20 when she wrote Nada; the 'nothing' of the title reflects her juvenile inter e st in exi st ent i al i st literature, yet this is no dreary philosophical treatise In pages of precise, finely-tuned prose, Spain emerges as a country obsessed by death and religious sufferance. Franco, with his thorny asceticism, used to keep St Teresa's mummified hand by his bedside. And Nada, with its bleak biblical imagery, conjures a Goyaesque world of emotional flagellants and wife-beaters. The heavy upholstered furniture of the house on Calle de Aribau conceals a history of appalling violence. The grandmother, a gentle soul, tries to arbitrate between Andrea's two wayward uncles, a pious aunt and a fiercely jealous housekeeper as they fight for space in the same cramped quarters. Andrea, agog at the spectacle of family violence, observes from the shadows, frightened and confused. Sometimes at night she slinks out of the house into the Catalan capital, mingling with sideshow freaks and

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other rough types in Barcelona's Barrio Chino. One of the uncles, Ramon, is a bohemian litérateur and minor composer, with a history of Communist sympathy. Andrea is attracted to him and is left bereft when he dies in murky circumstances. Laforet explores her heroine's burgeoning sexuality with an emotional maturity which would be impressive in a novelist twice her age: Andrea, with her brazen self-exploration, is a marvellous creation. First published in Spain 60 years ago, Nada was translated in 2007 into English in an excellent work by Edith Grossman - Doctor, doctor, tengo tendencias suicidas, ¿qué hago? "Doctor, doctor, I have suicidal tendencies. What should I do?" - Págueme ya mismo. "Pay me this instant."

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Thorium could save our Planet. Thorium is a metal which like uranium, is capable of producing nuclear energy, ideally in a Mo l ten Salt Reac tor. The U SA experimented with it in the 1960s, but soon stopped their research because Thorium cannot be used for nuclear weapons which were considered essential during the cold war. Unfortunately for all of us, almost all nuclear research and development since then has been centred on Uranium. This may have been very useful for producing bombs, but the resultant nuclear power industry is now so dangerous that everyone is fearful of building more reactors. The potential pollution from any serious accident could make large areas of our planet uninhabitable for hundreds, or even thousands, of years! The obvious solution therefore is to switch to Thorium. This element is far more abundant, the reactor cannot start to melt-down (as happened at Chernobyl and in Japan) or be effectively used for weapons. The reactor can burn 100% of its fuel, and, perhaps most important of all, could also be used to dispose of all the existing stockpiles of nuclear waste! The advantages are quite extraordinary. And y e t t he r e a r e m a n y t h a t s a y t ha t T ho r i u m reactors will never be seriously developed. The naysayers insist that other technologies based on renewable resources such as wind, solar,

and wave power will make it unnecessary and, in any case, the development of Thorium will take too long to stop climate change. Furthermore, there is just so much investment in Uranium that no one wants to `switch horses’. The USA, who could make a huge difference, seem reluctant to take the lead. However, in spite of the hurdles, there are signs that the revolution is still going to happen. The Chinese and the Indians are making investments to build reactors, and in the UK the new `Weinberg Foundation’ was set up last year as a powerful lobby group. The use of Thorium just makes so much sense that its adoption will surely be inevitable. Unless someone has a better idea, how else could we dispose of all our stockpiles of nuclear waste, stop nuclear weapons proliferation, and keep our populations safe from catastrophic accidents and global warming? The first country to develop the technology will have a huge pay-off in selling the solution to others. We can develop it ourselves or buy the ready-made reactors from say China. Either way, a solid commitment by even a single country could see the world’s energy problems totally resolved by 2030. We can then worry about over-population instead!

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Leo (July 21-Aug. 22) Do not be concerned about money and/or resources. Do not allow yourself to radiate frustration and impatience. Gently and carefully a new level of love is attempting to find you. It takes your intentions for clear communication and making contact that is real for this to occur. Someone loves you. Take some unexpected time off from work.

Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) You need a new group to work within. You also need to lead a group. What do these words means to you? I ask this because new information will be forthcoming and you will not be able to share it with your old groups of friends. And when you don't share, you feel lost and alone. Something's coming encased in light waves.

Libra (Sept. 23-Oct.22) A need to talk though many concerns around work, daily life, and how you serve others (which work should be) occurs. You seek to serve and not exact due service. You seek to heal and not hurt. Because you know the "sons" (suns) of men (mind) are One. Maintain a very deep level of Soul contact. Speak what's in your mind and heart. Choose the one who listens.

Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov.21) You're impelled to move forward (hold on awhile), impatient with the past. Relentless thoughts push you into the future, rattling your present. Your seeking to expand your relationships may not be the best for everyone. Careful of impetuous choices. You may fall down, hurting and dissolving things most valuable to you.

Sagittarius(Nov. 22-Dec. 20) Slow down with monetary expenditures unless it relates to family. Talking with brothers and sisters concerning the future and/ or business may be necessary. You will need to maintain wisdom and practicality so be aware and prepared. You need a bit of nurturing. Hide away somewhere for awhile. A past relationship calls.

Capricorn(Dec. 21-Jan. 20) Be especially careful with the use of money lest you feel wounds around being good enough. Perhaps there's a bit of confusion around money. It seems to be passing through your hands like water, which it is. Keeping records and assessing where money is going may be what's needed. Don't worry. You'll be fine. You just need a bit of bookkeeping.

Aquarius(Jan. 21-Feb.18) All hurdles, barricades, hindrances and restraints can be unblocked through knowledge. But first you must have the new Aquarian knowledge for there is great amounts of the work called Love needed in the world. Sophia, the feminine intuitive aspect beyond Jupiter (abstract mind), is calling you. Stop wobbling in the lower mind. You are to reach up, up, up. This impacts your future plans.

Pisces (Feb. 18-March 20) You'll feel rather intense with aspirations and seek through relationships self-transformations. They will be gentle but they will be real, these feelings. Without effort monetary situations become easier, but only for a while, so don't overextend. Something beautiful (or loving) comes into your sphere. It hovers to see if you're receptive. Or if you can see it. Be observant and still.

Aries (March 21-April 20) Everything spoken prior to now will be refocused, rephrased, and restated in ways you can understand. It's important to come from the heart when communicating. The heart of the matter always brings forth the waters of life which nurture, serve, and save (self and others). Maintain thoughtfulness so "right thinking" comes about.eplace the mystical with the occult.

Taurus (April 21-May 21) You are definitely a team player. Trite words but containing great praise. With all the emotions, tensions, comedy and tragedy playing out around you what character are you playing? It's best to be in the audience or perhaps director is best so you can explain the bits and pieces of drama to everyone. Understanding then appears. So what are your dreams, plans, wishes, hopes?

Gemini(May 23-June20) You begin to be businesslike, systematic, pragmatic, and sensible now knowing this is best after several months of dreaming. Goals must be assessed and the path geographically understood. Careful with communication. You could be impatient. Foot in the mouth disease will affect relationships. Circle gently and carefully around each issue.

Cancer(June 21-July20) Money and home are the main issues as they have been for the past year. But now they are truly in focus. Your generosity to others will be reciprocated with kindness, care, and in loving ways. Gifts may descend unexpectedly. There's electricity encircling you. Don't get shocked (literally and figuratively).

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PC TIPS

ARE YOU SITTING COMFORTABLY!!

Regular computer users run the risk of several health problems. Most computer-related jobs require people to sit in front of the computer for longer periods. Maintain a good working posture: According to the US Department of Labor Occupational Safety and Health Administration, the following are important considerations when attempting to maintain neutral body postures while working at the computer workstation: • Hands, wrists and forearms are straight, in-line and roughly parallel to the floor. • Head is level or bent slightly forward, forward facing, and balanced. Generally it is in-line with the torso. • Shoulders are relaxed and upper arms hang normally at the side of the body. • Elbows stay in close to the body and are bent between 90 and 120 degrees. • Feet are fully supported by floor or footrest. • Back is fully supported with appropriate lumbar support when sitting vertical or leaning back slightly. • Thighs and hips are supported by a well-padded seat and generally parallel to the floor. • Knees are about the same height as the hips with the feet slightly forward. Place and adjust the monitor: Place the computer monitor at the recommended viewing distance and angle, adjusting it to the right clarity settings. • Adjust your position at a safe distance from where you can clearly view the elements on the monitor and read the text without slipping to awkward postures. The preferred distance between the eye and monitor is in the range of 20-40 inches (50-100 cm). • Adjust your computer monitor to be directly in front of you with your head, neck, and torso facing the screen. Your monitor should not be farther than 35 degrees to the left or right. • Give periodic rest to your eyes by looking at faraway objects. For example, a clock or calendar on the wall that is away from your workstation. Viewing the monitor for a long period results in fatigue and dryness. You must stop, look away and blink at regular

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intervals to give your eyes the necessary moisture. Other non-computer tasks such as filing, phone work, etc., can help your eyes take the needed break from the stress. Position the pointer/mouse to maintain a straight and neutral wrist posture: If the keyboard tray/surface is not large enough to accommodate both the keyboard and mouse, try one of the following to limit stresses related to reaching and holding: • A mouse platform positioned over the keyboard. This design allows the mouse to be used above the 10-key pad. • A mouse tray next to the keyboard tray. • A fingertip joystick attached to the keyboard. • Pointing devices attached to the keyboard such as a touchpad. • Point devices such as mouse that have the right size so that they fit the hand. • Mousepad with a wrist rest. Keep the keyboards at a comfortable position: Placing keyboards, pointing devices, or working surfaces too high or too low may result in awkward wrist, arm, and shoulder postures. • Adjust the chair height and desk height to maintain a neutral body posture. • Raise or lower the tilt of the keyboard to maintain straight, neutral wrist postures. • I f y o u a r e l e f t- h a n d u s e r, u s e a n a l te r n at i ve l ef t h a n d keyboard, which has the keypad permanently affixed to the left side. Adjust the location of frequently-used devices: Devices such as keyboard, phone and mouse must be placed within the repetitive access (primary work zone) area. Use mobile and size-adjustable chairs: Desks that are not at the right height may force you to take awkward postures such as extending your arms to reach the keyboard or raising your shoulders. Make sure that you have adequate clearance space for your thighs, legs, etc. particularly if you frequently change working postures. • Seating Opt for a chair that provides adequate support to your back, legs, buttocks, and arms. For example, an ideal chair for your workstation should have the following: • Backrest that adjusts well to the natural curvature of your spine and provides necessary lumbar support • Comfortable seat that allows your feet to rest flat on the floor or a footrest that helps you adjust the height • Soft armrests that allow your shoulders to relax and your elbows to stay close to your body • Five-leg base with casters that allow easy movement along the floor Keep the phone at your reach: Most office workers cannot do without a telephone at work. Placing the telephone at the right place is as important as adjusting other workplace objects. Keep the phone close enough to avoid repeated reaching. Use a speaker phone or a headset for teleconferences or long conversations These guidelines will help to improve your posture at the pc. But if any health i s s u e s co nt i n u e y o u s h o u l d a l w a y s consult your doctor.


news in spain U.S. Department of State releases annual report on human rights in Spain

T h e 2 0 11 r e p o r t h a s many criticisms of corruption, police brutality and discrimination against paperless immigrants. A report just released by the Obama administration in Washington has an annual Country Report on human rights and Spain’s listing is not happy reading. The US State Department noted mistreatment and excessive forced used by police at demonstrations held to protest against health and education cuts as well as the M_15 indignant rallies. It notes the protest in Barcelona on May 27 when ‘Videos and photographs showed police hitting men and women with batons while they were sitting on the ground with t h e i r h a n d s i n t h e a i r. T h e d a y ended with 121 injuries, including 37 police. The report notes the limited access in Spain for undocumented immigrants and believable reports were given arrest quotas for immigrants, using ethnic and racial profiling to achieve that goal. Gender based domestic violence against women and girls was also a problem. The State Department noted the corruption cases in Spain, particularly at the provincial and municipal levels, and counted 730 corruption investigations open in the courts.

Al Qaeda group wants to recover Al-Andalus he group, Ansar Al Din, talks about its plans in an internal document intercepted by the Spanish T State Security Forces.

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ranada, Valencia, Sevilla and Córdoba, are named as terrorist objectives for Al Qaeda. he Jihadist group, Ansar Al Din, has released an internal document which said the cities ‘which were governed by the Muslims’ must be liberated and Al-

Andalus must be restored. panish State Security Forces are giving credence to the threat after they intercepted the internal communication. After study they concluded that Spain remains one of the main targets of Al Qaeda in the Islamic Maghreb.

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adena Ser reports that after the fall of Gadaffi, the Ansar Al Din terrorist group made off with a large quantity of Libyan weapons and had become stronger in Mali and Timbuktu. Many witnesses claim the group has been responsible for the assassination of hundreds of people. ccording to the security services in Algeria, the group is getting funds from France and Canada in particular.

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Hay fever Causes of hay fever Hay fever is caused by breathing in pollen particles and by pollen getting into the eyes. You can get hay fever at any time from early spring to late summer, depending on which pollen or pollens you're allergic to. Grasses pollinate during mid-summer from May to August. The most profusely pollinating grasses are timothy, rye, cocksfoot, meadow and fescue. Occasionally, in late summer and autumn, weeds such as nettles and dock as well as mugwort and plantain can trigger hay fever. The condition tends to occur in atopic allergy-prone families and usually starts in the early teens, with symptoms peaking in the 20s. Symptoms of hay fever The main symptoms of hay fever are: • Repeated sneezing attacks • Runny or itchy nose • Itchy or watery eyes • Itchy throat, palate and ears • Loss of concentration • General feeling of being unwell (hence 'fever') If the pollen count is very high, many will also wheeze (so-called hay asthma). Hay fever treatments The most useful treatments for hay fever are: • Antihistamine tablets and nasal sprays, which if taken regularly help to relieve a runny nose, sneezing, an itchy throat and itchy, watery eyes • Anti-inflammatory nasal sprays and nose drops (usually containing steroids), which reduce inflammation in the delicate lining of the nose. These should be taken daily for the best results • Anti-allergy nasal sprays and eye drops, such as cromoglycate, which act on the linings of the nose and eyes to stop the allergen triggering a reaction • Decongestant tablets and sprays can help if the nose is blocked and stuffy, but can lead to rebound blocking Most of these medicines are available over the counter, but some are only available on prescription. You may need to try different treatments or find a combination that works best for you. Steroid injections, although effective for symptom control, are discouraged owing to unwanted side effects such asosteoporosis, cataracts and skin thinning. Homeopathic and herbal treatments are less effective than conventional therapies. Some experts advocate taking local honey every day for a few months before the pollen season starts to improve symptoms, but no studies have been performed to prove this.

If symptoms remain severe despite medication, you may benefit from desensitisation immunotherapy to grass pollen. This involves being given tablets or injections containing minute amounts of pollen, with the dose being increased gradually over a three-year period to induce immune tolerance and cure the allergy. Preventing hay fever If you have hay fever, there are steps you can take to avoid exposing yourself to pollen: • Keep an eye on the pollen count (often included in weather reports) and stay inside as much as possible when it's high. • Wear wrap-around sunglasses to stop pollen getting in your eyes • Saline douches or a little Vaseline applied inside the nose will reduce symptoms • Keep car windows closed and switch on the air conditioning to prevent pollen entering the car • Keep bedroom doors and windows closed in midmorning and early evening when pollen levels peak • Avoid areas such as parks or fields, particularly in the early evening when there's a lot of pollen floating at nose level • Get someone else to mow the lawn and don't lie on freshly cut grass • Change into clean clothes when you come home and wash the clothes you wore outside You may be able to find out what you're allergic to by having allergy tests. You can then take practical steps to avoid that particular pollen. All content within this Health article is provided for general information only, and should not be treated as a substitute for the medical advice of your own doctor or any other health care professional. Always consult your own GP if you're in any way concerned about your health.

14 email: info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977 457 201


Asian sex gang

alternatives such as processed restaurant cheese and wholemeal baps, successfully turned around thanks and often alienated its regular to Gordon Ramsay clientele by charging ten pence An Asian takeaway restaurant can it be true for those little sachets of that was repeatedly failing its barbecue sauce. customers by plying them with ‘Easy Meat was a restaurant alcohol and having sex with them that was haemorrhaging money has won its first Michelin star for f***’s sake’, said Ramsay, thanks to a strictly hands-on 42. ‘By plying his guests with approach by award-winning chef free alcohol, Kabeer Gordon Ramsay. was missing out on a In perhaps what has been significant mark-up. his toughest challenge That’s no way to run a yet, the foul-mouthed f*****g business.’ Hell’s Kitchen star took ‘When customers on demoralised staff and are going directly to a ‘culture of predatory the police with their paedophilia’ and ushered complaints, you need in a new whole new era in to ask yourself what’s takeaway dining. going wrong - how can When Ramsay took over, I fix it? ‘ Chunky Al’s "Easy Meat" ‘With the Head Chef, Chicken Restaurant was Front of House and six losing customers at an of the back room staff now in prison, alarming rate or farming them out to an I’ve been able to bring in my own people expanding sex ring. and have make radical alterations to But the sweary Scot quickly identified the menu.’ the problem as ‘wayward’ Head Chef ‘This was a place where people were Kabeer Hassan, a hugely talented cook afraid to come and eat. Now the and serial offender who had simply lost customers are flooding back, safe in the his way. knowledge that the taxi they ordered to Prior to Ramsay’s involvement, Easy take them home won’t drop them off at Meat had been failing to inform its several different addresses. mainly teenage customers of healthy

 





The Grim Reaper came for me last night, and I beat him off with a vacuum cleaner.

       

Talk about Dyson with death.

  

A mate of mine recently admitted to being addicted to brake fluid. When I quizzed him on it he reckoned he could stop any time....

A. M. P. A. R. E. The society for the protection of animals Ebro region. Based in Mora La Nova. We desperately need to re-home dogs to make room for more! We have over 200 dogs for adoption. Wendy 637 981158 English Isabel 977 404720 Spanish/ Catalan Donations always appreciated.

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On holiday recently in Spain I saw a sign that said 'English speaking Doctor' - I thought, 'What a good idea, why don't we have them in our country?'

16


Escape from the crowds and enjoy a memorable day afloat Butterfly, a classic yacht in the Delta del Ebro. Relax with an ice cold drink, spread out on the huge deck cushions and experience the tranquillity of sailing around the beautiful Alfaques Bay.

Sail In The Beautiful Alfacs Bay Delta del Ebro Natural Park Sant Carles de la Ràpita

Sailing Trips & Charters

You will sail along the 8 beaches of Sant Carles de la Ràpita and across the bay through the largest mussel farms in the Mediterranean searching for a quiet spot to drop anchor for bathing off the beaches of the Ebro Delta Natural Park. You can visit interesting spots such as the Salinas de la Trinidad, the Sant Joan Tower, the “Banya” Point, and the small fishing harbour of Les Cases d’Alcanar where you will find excellent restaurants. You can find plenty of time to enjoy the tranquillity of the bay and above all the gentle billowing of the sails. Watching of migratory birds like flamingos, is a main attraction in the Delta del Ebro National Park and possible on board Butterfly. Captain Lucas will be happy to teach you how to sail or initiate you into trolling for fish.

Half day and full day tours with delicious snacks from the region included, with the possibility of tasting local sea food. Sunset cruises and full moon cruises are especially romantic. Ideal for celebrations. THE PERFECT GIFT

tel: 660 907 189

Prices starting at 40€ per person (25€ kids under 14)

www.myspace/butterflycharters

Captain Lucas welcomes any special requests.

www.butterfly-charters.com

Maximum 12 persons, min. 2 persons

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17 1


MAJOR CATALUNYAN FIESTAS a sh i ve ha ou w u o a y this e y s If iest on lea f al lace LY p c lo o p r Ju ct et fo ta -oliv e ge con h a t p

@ inrfeoss.com l i a p -m

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The Grec Festival of Barcelona is the city’s main annual date with theatre, dance, music, circus and other stage arts. This is a longstanding festival that will take place for no less than the 36th time in 2012. Over the years, moreover, the Grec has become not only the most outstanding summer cultural attraction in Barcelona, but also a key reference on the European festival calendar. The festival’s title is taken from its main venue, where the opening sessions invariably take place: the Teatre Grec, or Greek Theatre, on Montjuïc, an open-air theatre built for the 1929 Universal Exhibition. Promoted b y Ba rce lon a C it y Counc il, t he Grec Festival also involves a considerable number of the city’s private impresarios and promoters, who produce and organise many of the shows on the programme. The festival is financed by public money, by income from sponsors and by revenue from ticket sales. With a history stretching back thirty-five years, the Grec Festival of Barcelona has become the leading producer of shows in Catalonia. The event pursues a dual mission: to support local production and produce outstanding works by Catalan artists and companies; and to provide a window onto the world, presenting the most interesting works from around the world in Barcelona. Indeed, the festival is today the city’s leading showcase for performances of shows produced abroad. Since 2009, moreover, the Grec Festival of Barcelona has worked with the Avignon Festival, the Athens-Epidaurus Festival and Istanbul International Theatre

Festival, all fellow members of the Kadmos network. Kadmos was set up to enable these festivals to organise joint production and promotion projects for artists and shows, to exchange experiences and to share political and social reflections about the region that is home to all four, the Mediterranean Local Police hunting the 'knitting needle nutter ’, who has stabbed six people in the village in the last 48 hours, believe the attacker could be following some kind of pattern

18 email: info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977 457 201


The Pamplona bull run takes place at 8am every morning from 7th to 14th July. Runners must be in the running area by 7.30am. The actual run stretches from the corral at Santo Domingo where the bulls are kept to the bullring where they will fight that same afternoon. The length of the run is 825 metres and the average time of the run from start to finish is about three minutes. The streets through the old town which make up the bull run are walled off so the bulls can’t escape. Each day six fighting bulls run the route as well as two herds of bullocks. The tension builds as the release of the bulls approaches and at 8am on the dot a rocket is fired to confirm that the gate has been opened at the Santo Domingo corral. Runners dressed in white with a red hankerchief around their necks pray to San Fermin then a second rocket announces that the bulls have left. The bulls and the runners then proceed along the route

- Jo, tío, me acabo de comprar un aparato para la sordera que es una maravilla. Me lo puedo meter en la oreja y nadie se da cuenta. "Hey, man, I have just bought myself an aid for deafness that is a wonder. I can put it in my ear and nobody realizes it." - Jo, ¡qué cosas...! ¿y cuánto te ha costado? "Huh, what things [will they think of next]! And how much did it cost you?" - Las dos y cuarto. "A quarter past two."

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19


property news round-up Salutations! Summer is finally here, ushered in by Spain’s anarchic Sant Joan fiesta, a glorious pagan ritual involving staying up all night, leaping over bonfires, letting off prodigious amounts of fireworks (to scare off evil spirits), and —of course— a lot of noise. I love the way that no matter how depressing things get, ordinary Spaniards and Catalans simply put aside their worries for a while and get down to the serious business of enjoying themselves. It’s a shame all those fireworks won’t be enough to ward away the sinister market forces circling round Spain right now… But hey! life and property sales go on, so here’s a selection of this month’s property news.

Tax relief on main residences – on the way out?

At the end of 2010, Spain’s socialist government restricted the tax deduction for acquiring a primary residence in Spain to those earning under 24.000 Euros a year, which caused a rush to complete property sales by the end of the year. Predictably, one of the first moves of Mariano Rajoy’s incoming government was to reinstate and backdate this tax break, which applies to Spanish nationals and residents. Anyone who does a yearly tax return here in Spain and who pays a mortgage will know that it can make quite a difference. However, its days could be numbered if the International Monetary Fund has its way. The IMF is urging the Spanish government to scrap this tax break along with fiscal relief for companies, and to raise IVA value added tax and cut civil service pay. Measures that may be necessary, but that are unlikely to stimulate the economy, and that will undoubtedly make life harder for most people in Spain… Note that if you are a resident of Spain and already pay a mortgage on your first residence, you can continue to claim tax relief. As I understand it, the change will apply to those who have yet to buy.

Reduced capital gains on second homes

Part of a package of measures proposed by the Spanish government last month and currently in anteproyecto (draft) phase, is a 50 per cent reduction in capital gains tax for residents of Spain who buy second homes and investment properties before the end of 2012. If approved, the tax break will apply to individuals and companies, but not to sales between parents and children. And it won’t apply to first homes, which already benefit from a reduction of 100 per cent in CGT tax — if you are a resident of Spain. The measure is aimed at holiday-home buyers and investors, who will pay 50 percent less capital gains tax if they buy this year.

You may have seen this reported in the Spanish news as a cut in the plusvalía, a term which is more usually used to refer to the municipal tax paid on the increase in land values when a property is sold.

Proposed new regulations for long-term rentals

The same package of proposed measures also aims to stimulate the Spanish rental market. Key changes include: - The obligatory period in which a tenant can automatically renew a yearly rental is to be reduced from five years to three. - Tenants will be able to leave a property by giving one month’s notice. At the moment, they have to respect the period of notice stipulated in the contract. - Landlords who need to recover a rented property because they, their immediate family or spouse need to live there can now do so by giving two month’s notice, regardless of whether this possibility is included in the rental contract. - Existing tax relief for landlords who are residents of Spain to be extended to non-residents. Although, as I understand it, relief is in the form of a discount on the Impuesto sobre la Renta de no Residentes, an annual property tax for non-resident property owners that few non-resident owners appear to pay anyway. Other proposed changes could make it easier to evict problem tenants. You can view a simple slide show (in Spanish) that neatly summarises it all at http://www. slideshare.net/dmontero1977/anteproyecto-ley-alquiler.

Cédula de habitabilidad: so far so good

I’m pleased to say that, at last, getting a cédula de habitabilidad —the all-important habitation certificate that ’s required when you buy or sell a house that ’s registered as a dwelling or contract mains services— is now a relatively simple process. Which is what it should have been all along of course. As I write this, my architect has successfully obtained several cédulas for properties that would not previously have qualified. Most owners of rural dwellings will now be able to get one, regardless of whether the house is registered at the Land Registry or Catastro. So feel free to contact me for a no-obligation consultation if you need one. Finally, I have buyers looking for realistically-priced fincas with habitable houses, in the l’Ametlla-El Perellól’Ampolla area and preferably with nice views, please email me at jeff@fincasdirect.com. Jeff Greensmith runs www.fincasdirect.com and is a registered estate agent and experienced Spanish/ Catalan translator and interpreter. He has lived in Catalonia since 1986. While the points contained in this article are true to best of our knowledge, they do not constitute legal or tax advice on the part of Fincas Direct or The Olive Press. Please use this information responsibly and seek professional legal advice if in doubt. Tortosa

Paüls

Practical: 10 min Tortosa, 3-bed bungalow. Flat, fenced plot, water and electricity.

Romantic: 10 min Paüls, 2-bed farmhouse. Spectacular location, water, cherry trees.

20 email: info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977 457 201


beach holidays & language academy Costalingua · LA MARGARITA P ES Casas de verano en primera línea de mar - con posibilidad de combinar con cursos de idiomas! ¡Infórmese ahora de nuestros alquileres y de nuestros cursos de verano para adultos, niños y adolescentes! GB

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news in spain Possible court case resulting from the death of British child on Baqueira Beret ski slopes The child was asphixiated from a pile of snow moved by a snow grooming machine The judge in First Instance Court in Vielha, Lleida, has closed the instruction stage of the case of the five year old British child who died on the ski pistes at Baqueira Beret in 2011. The judge has however keep the indictments against the driver of the snow grooming machine, Jordi M., which killed the child, and Jordi C., who was responsible for the ski resort. The judge thinks the two workers could be responsible for a crime of serious negligent manslaughter. It happened on February 24 2011 after 5pm,

when the grooming machine knocked down a mound of snow ‘without paying due attention’, burying the child, Federico N., who was waiting with his father and two brothers for the arrival of their mother who was still on the slopes. The child was taken to the Vielha Hospital and then to the Purpan Hospital in Toulouse, France, where he died on March 9 2011 as a consequence of asphyxia. Now the prosecuting office and those implicated have ten days to ask the judge to open an oral hearing and formulise the allegations, or to ask for the case to be archived. Hay tres clases de personas: There are three kinds of people: las que saben contar y las que no. those who know how to count, and those who don't.

www.the-olive-press.com

21


news in spain Scottish man stabbed to death in Lloret street fight

The man has been named as 26 year old Craig Mallon who was in the town for his brother's stag party.

A 26 year old Scottish man, Craig Mallon, has been found dead at 7,30 am this morning, Saturday, in the street in Lloret de Mar. According to sources close to the investigation is seems that he was stabbed in a fight in the early hours of the morning between tourists visiting Lloret. No firearms have been found and Catalunya Informació says the Scot died from a heart attack after being stabbed. He was in the town to celebrate his brother’s stag party. It’s believed that alcohol was drunk by those implicated in the fight, but as yet there are no official details. It appears that as yet there have been no arrests, although the regional Catalan police, the Mossos d’Esquadra, will only confirm the death of a person. The Mossos d’Esquadra has opened a full investigation and has introduced reporting restrictions. If it is confirmed that the young Briton died as a consequence of a fight in the nightlife area of Lloret de Mar it would be similar to what happened on February 24 in Girona when a 36 year old Colombian national died at the doors of a discotheque after a clash between two groups of people. A Romanian and a Polish man were arrested for their alleged involvement in that crime.

Gibraltar First Minister issues strong statement against the Spanish Fabian Picardo is defending the sovereignty of Gibraltar

challenge on jurisdiction to the courts, rather than seek confrontation at sea. ‘ Those who orchestrating these dangerous confrontations need to come to their senses and accept the challenge, once and for all, to litigate their claims to our territory in the relevant international tribunals established for that purpose in the 21st century, and not put people’s safety and security at risk trying to advance their position out of sea as if in the 18th century’ he said. The Spanish Interior Minister, Jorge Fernández Díaz, warned that Spain ‘will not accept a policy of fait accompli which supposes a ‘violation of Spanish sovereignty’ in the talks to resolve the fishing conflict in the waters of Gibraltar. He said that the Spanish Government would ‘defend the rights to fish of our fishermen with dialogue and reason’. Fabian Picardo says his position will be underlined by British Interior Minister William Hague when he meets his Spanish counterpart, José Manuel Garcia-Margallo in London on Tuesday next week. The UK Minister for Europe, David Lidington, is also understood to have called Picardo to assure him of Britain’s position. Britain claims three miles of territorial sea around the Rock but this is not accepted by Spain.

Is there a doctor in the House

For years, the powers that be have been misdiagnosing the problems in Europe. Greece was put through the wringer to try and pay back loans it couldn´t possibly afford and their economy is on its knees as a result. Ireland´s government thought that guaranteeing all the reckless loans its banks made would prevent a financial crisis (it didn´t, but there are now plenty of bargains available as a result). And now Spain is being asked to move mountains to cut a budget deficit and a public debt that are not even that high to begin with (its public debt is lower than Germanys, its budget deficit is lower than the UK & USA). Instead of austerity, what Spain really needed last year was a huge injection of capital into its banks. The reason the government didn´t do it was because injecting public funds into their banking system would have added a few points to their (low) public debt. Logical I Don’t Think so? The fact that they´ve recapitalized their banks in dribs and drabs is a big reason their public borrowing costs are now so high.

Following the clashes on Wednesday night between Spanish fishermen and the Gibraltar Police, the Gibraltar Chief Minister, Fabian Picardo, has issued a statement. The clashes saw the incursion of the Guardia Civil and the presence of a Royal Navy ship in the area and went on for several hours. Mr Picardo strongly condemned the incursion by the Guardia Civil and Spanish fishermen and described the incidents as ‘an obviously carefully premeditated challenge to our indisputable sovereignty, jurisdiction and control of British Gibraltar Territorial Waters and our airspace’. He said the decision makers in Spain should take their

22 email: info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977 457 201

Like Ireland, the root of Spain´s problems is private debt, not p u b l i c d e b t . I n o t h e r wo rd s , the government didn´t borrow too much - its banks, property d e v e l o p e rs a n d c i t i ze n s d i d . Wa s t i n g t w o p r e c i o u s y e a r s concentrating efforts on cutting the government deficit and ignoring the mounting bad debts in the banking system strikes me as a little crazy ! (like our doctor pictured).


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For sale Spanish style 2 bedroom house.

Built in 2004 with central heating/radiators,bathroom,large lounge, American style kitchen, own high pressure system,electricity. Detached brick built large double garage and separate storeroom. 2nd edificio 400 meters from main building formerly used as stables with separate enclosure. Flat land just under 5 acres, formerly fruit orchards but water system still in place. Partly fenced. Would be ideal for animals, horses etc or agriculture. Large Swimming Pool next to house. Walking distance into Benissanet. 3 minutes by car to Mercadona Supermarket in Mora D Ebre. Close to Mora La Nova Station for Barcelona,Zaragoza Etc. tel:603198280 or 0044 208 297 2039 (Ted & Sharon)

Price149,000€ ovno.

1 email:Sell info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977145€ 457- fsbospain@gmail.com 201 your property 1/4 page 80€ - 1/2 page - 663 921 172 Lovely house situated on a housing estate 2km from village of

Alforja, Tarragona. Fantastic, panoramic views of surrounding valley and Prades Mountains. House very private but has neighbours close by. It has all its legal papers•All main services and internet connection•2 bedrooms, bathroom, fitted kitchen, lounge and dining room. In total 65m²•Garage 40m² with main services installed•Workshop with electricity•BBQ room for summer cooking.•Wood-fired bread oven•Huge terrace with dip pool•1000m² of terraced land planted with nut, fruit and olive trees, private well for watering•Parking space. The estate has a bar/restaurant, there are also year round social occasions organized by the resident association. The village of Alforja is only 2km from the house where you will find shops, bars and restaurants. There is also a sports centre and swimming pool•10 minutes to the city of Reus, where there are large supermarkets, shops, hospital•Coast 35 minutes•Reus airport 15 minutes, Barcelona airport 60 minutes. Ideal house to lock-up and leave but also suited for year-round living. Caroline 977 054 874 or spainhousesale@yahoo.com

Priced to sell 145,000€ fixed price.

1 email:Sell info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977145€ 457- fsbospain@gmail.com 201 your property 1/4 page 80€ - 1/2 page - 663 921 172

Caroline Baker 1_4 Page July 2012.indd 1

6/18/2012 8:20:31 AM

Perfect for an Equestrian Business or Rural Home Near the village of Benissanet in Tarragona Province. 140 m 2 build on 18000 m 2 flat plot 1200 m 2 fenced area around the house Panoramic views of the surrounding countryside Mains electricity (3ph) Mains Water Hardstanding for 72m 2 new build (planning passed and tax paid)

Contact 686 631 236 977 095 036

Price 299,000€

1 email:Sell info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977145€ 457- fsbospain@gmail.com 201 your property 1/4 page 80€ - 1/2 page - 663 921 172 24 email: info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977 457 201


FOR SALE BY OWNER GET YOUR PROPERTY SEEN FROM VINAROS ON THE VALENCIA BORDER TO ROSES IN THE NORTH

663 921 172 fsbospain@gmail.com

Make an Of fer

Sell your property 1/4 page 80€ - 1/2 page 145€ - fsbospain@gmail.com - 663 921 172

FSBO 1_4 Page Ad.indd 1

For sale.

6/19/2012 6:26:07 PM

Semi detached, 2 bed, 1 bathroom, 95 m 2 , Communal pool, Secluded Urbanisation, L'escala Costa Brava. tel: 667 917 458

Price170,000€

1 email:Sell info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977145€ 457- fsbospain@gmail.com 201 your property 1/4 page 80€ - 1/2 page - 663 921 172 Villa 1 1_4 Page.indd 1

6/19/2012 3:12:35 PM

Ve ry n ice v i l la lo cated i n C a net de ma r

pe r fect for com m uti ng i nto Ba rce lona or hol iday home 3 b eds 1 bath 400 m2 plot 100 m2 b u i ld close to a l l a men itie s a nd b us a nd tra i n stations (the re is a lo ca l key holde r who ca n b e the re for v iew i ngs.) Please contact 0044 113 815 2051,

Priced for a quick sale at 175,000€

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25


L o c a l L o t h a r i o celebrates eighth full year of paternity leave

his appearance on the front page guarantees a boost in circulation, from mothers keen for a photo can it be true to show their kids when they’re older. Liverpool’s libertine is hopeful of maintaining his paternity leave until retirement age, although he admits its sometimes a struggle t o k e e p i t u p . “ F o r t u n a t e l y, I h a v e a very extended family to fall back on, or as I prefer to call them, ‘friends with benefits’.”

A womaniser from Liverpool’s Shippam’s Estate is celebrating tonight, after securing his eighth full year of paternity l e a v e . D a v e G r o b b e l a a r, 27, received the happy news by text message from 'girlfriend' Sandy Twittock, while feeling up her sister in the snug of The P hilanderer ’s Arms. While Grobbelaar claims to be ‘Liverpools top handyman’, those too c l o s e t o h i m c l a i m h e ’s inexperienced with all but one tool. Confirmed father of around 15% of the local population, Grobbelaar now has his own parking space at the Tarbuck antenatal clinic. “Being a serial father can be really knackering”, claimed Grobbelaar, ‘but the paternity leave certainly helps. I spend at least an hour with each of my new borns, they bring me so much joy. They’re brilliant for pulling nurses at the hospital.” Grobbelaar believes that paternity leave is critical for establishing a bond with a new baby, and filling in the paperwork at the job centre helps him remember their addresses. “Babies don’t come with an instruction manual, but they do at least have books with their names in. I’m up to ‘Pamelia’, on page 38.” Critics of Grobbelaar claim that paternity leave is only intended for fathers who stay with their family, but he’s accused Janet Frizzle of ‘trying to break his free spirit’. And while she does have some help with childcare from her mum and three sisters, she’s reluctant to leave Grobbelaar alone with any of them. Young fathers have been much maligned in the local press, especially Grobbelaar, since he knocked up the features subeditor. But with so many dependents,

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Audi Driver Stripped of Car

Mr Rudolph Himmler, 53, of Girona , has had his 2012 Audi A4 repossessed after failing to adhere to the Audi brand ethos of aggressive and discourteous driving. After a tip off from a member of the Audi Drivers Society, the German manufacturer deployed the Audi Research and Surveillance Executive (ARSE) to monitor Mr Himmlers driving. In a statement Audi stated that they take their branding very seriously and although they would not discuss Mr Himmlers case in detail they stated generally that similar actions had been taken against owners for leaving adequate stopping distance, flashing people out at junctions and on slip roads and prolonged use of the near side lanes of autoroutes. Defending their position a spokesman stated that Audi owners not only parted with a significant amount of cash when purchasing their vehicles but were also expected to leave behind their good manners and any warm feelings they had for other road users. They also referred drivers to the owners handbook which states that if you can see the number plate of the car in front you are clearly too far behind it and also warns that straying too far from the central reservation can cause sensors in the car to steer towards the right. Mr Himmler is currently seeking legal advice and a new car.


R oman Abramovich sacks can it be true

RomanAbramovich

F

ollowing Chelsea's Champions League success, Roman Abramovich has fired himself. "It has become

something of a tradition that so m e o n e g e ts sacked when our Champions L e a g u e c a m p a i g n comes to an end. owever, due to the fact that we won the game and I had already fired the manager some months earlier, that option was not open to me. The only alternative was that I had to go." ith a history of 8 managers in 9 years, Abramovich has shown that he is very hard to please and he is hoping to find a more easy-going version of himself to bring on board. "The owner was a nightmare", he admitted. "He tried to get some of the highest profile men in the game to work for him, then let them go on a whim if they only beat Wigan 4-0. dd to that I've heard some very nasty rumours about what he has been doing to my wife. Frankly, it's something I should have done years ago."

H

W A

FIVE BEST SENTENCES: 1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity, by legislating the wealth out of prosperity. 2. What one person receives without working for...another person must work for without receiving. 3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else. 4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it. 5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work, because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work, because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that is the beginning of the end of any nation!

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1000´S OF BRITISH AND EU CITIZENS CAN RECOVER S PA N I S H I N H E R I TA N C E TAXES PAID (OR TO BE PAID) TOTALLING AN E STIMATED €400 MILLION If you have paid inheritance tax in Spain and were a non-resident at the time you are entitled to claim back almost all the inheritance taxes paid to Spanish Tax Authorities. EU citizens that have inherited property or assets within the last 4 years or you are about to do so in the future can make a claim. The Spanish Inheritance Tax law treats residents and non-residents differently: non residents in Spain have to pay this tax in full, whereas those residing in Spain, in most cases, are virtually exempt from the tax or enjoy important tax benefits. These Spanish laws seem to be discriminatory a g a i n s t t h e E u r o p e a n U n i o n T r e a t y. T h e European Court of Justice recently condemned the Kingdom of Spain in a similar tax discrimination regarding Spanish Capital Gains Taxes where the Spanish Tax Office had to refund the overcharged money to the thousands of EU Citizens who took the correct decision of reclaiming back these taxes. The Capital Gains Tax Reclaim was won by the reputed International tax lawyer Mr. Emilio Alvarez successfully in front of the Spanish Courts and also received a final positive ruling of the European Court of Justice. Spanish Legal Reclaims is launching The Inheritance Tax Reclaim to help EU non-residents to reclaim back their Inheritance taxes paid in Spain. Spanish Legal Reclaims under the directives and advice of Mr. Alvarez and other leading European tax experts, will be reclaiming these monies back. Spanish Legal Reclaims are so convinced of winning the Court case and recovering the Inheritance Tax for the claimants, they offer a No-Win, NoFee agreement. The Inheritance Tax reclaim requires a wide knowledge and experience in Inheritance Tax law. Each claim has to be defended in Court case by case (class actions are not possible in Spain), until the end of the legal process. Only highly experienced international tax lawyers may be able to do so. If the legal procedure is not followed correctly or precise legal arguments are not used, claimants may ruin their chances of success as people affected can only make a claim once. Claimants should not accept advice from lawyers with no expertise in European tax reclaims and should be aware that reclaiming only in front of the local Spanish Tax Office is useless. Claims have to be won in Court, as the final decision will be taken by the Spanish High Court or the European Court of Justice. People who have been affected by the Inheritance tax discrimination should not worry about possible consequences of reclaiming their money back.

• It is their right by Spanish Law to reclaim any overcharged tax and this right is officially regulated in Spain. • “None of our capital gains tax claims made since 2007 have experienced any undue consequences”, states Mr. Emilio Alvarez. • The European Commission has already taken action against Spain for this Inheritance Law discrimination. F o l l o w i n g t h e r e c e n t l a u n c h o f t h e w w w. spanishlegalreclaims.com website, British people who believed they have been affected by the Spanish tax trap have come forward to highlight their plights and begin the process of recovering their money. Mr. Luis Cuervo CEO at Spanish Legal Reclaims commented: “Anyone who has inherited a Spanish property and who is not a Spanish resident will have been a victim of discriminatory IHT, which has seen non residents pay higher IHT bills. We believe this tax discrimination has affected up to 60,000 UK families alone, as well as thousands of people in other European countries. They may have believed they were fortunate to inherit a property in Spain, but in the process they have been scammed out of a lot of money. “We have successfully represented more than a Thousand UK citizens in the CGT reclaim and we are currently starting to represent again UK families in their bid to reclaim the money that has been wrongly taken from them, and we urge anyone else who believes they have been affected by this tax discrimination to come forward. Take quick action is important as the right to claim may expire” Clear requirements for reclaim 1. They have paid inheritance taxes in Spain in the last 4 years. (In Cataluyna from 2010) 2. The deceased or the inheritor were nonresident at the time they inherited. 3. Minimum of 4,000€ in IHT to make a claim viable. 4. Tax form Modelo 650 or Modelo 652 is needed for reclaim Spanish Legal Reclaims are experts in Spanish IHT tax and property laws and operate a no win no fee policy agreement. For more information, and details of how to register your interest, visit: www.spanishlegalreclaims.com Or call the helpline on 0845 680 3849 or email: info@spanishlegalreclaims.com Spanish Legal Reclaims S.L. Spanish Legal Reclaims S.L. (SLR) is a company specialized in Legal Reclaims against the Spanish State based on the violation of the EU Treaty rules. The company has been established this year 2011 and their team is the same one who successfully won the Capital Gains Tax Reclaim in cooperation with Mr. Emilio Alvarez, partner at Costa, Alvarez, Manglano and associates. SLR under the directives and advise of Mr. Emilio Alvarez, have reinforced their legal expertise by cooperating with top level European Tax Experts and other professionals coming from the most reputed Legal Consulting multinationals in order to make sure we have all the knowledge and expertise to win this new reclaim in front of the Spanish State.

28 email: info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977 457 201


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This month some really crisp crunchy biscuits to enjoy with a cup of coffee. Relax, take it easy and try these really easy recipes. Thanks Hilary.............. Ginger Biscuits Biscuits

113g Margarine 113g sugar 1 tablespoon golden syrup 170g S.R Flour 1 heaped teaspoon ground ginger 1 teaspoon bicarbonate soda Melt margarine and sugar and syrup together in a pan or in a bowl in the microwave. Mix well then add flour, ginger and bicarbonate of soda and mix together until mixture leaves sides of the bowl. Place mixture in small balls on a greased baking tray and bake at 180c 375f or Gas 5 for 10minutes or until golden brown Cool in tins for a few minutes and then transfer to a wire cooling rack

Oat biscuits 113g Margarine 113g Sugar 1 tablespoon golden syrup 113g S.R Flour 113g rolled oats 1 tsp bicarbonate soda

TREAT YOUR TASTE BUDS

Melt margarine, sugar and syrup together as for the ginger biscuits above Add flour, oats and bicarbonate soda and mix well. Form into walnut sized balls and place on baking tray well spaced to allow for spreading. Bake at 180c or Gas 4-5 for 10 minutes or until golden brown. Cool on a wire rack. Oven Temperatures This is an approximate conversion chart between gas mark and electric ovens, hope you find it useful Gas Fahrenheit Celsius Description 1/4 225 110 Very cool/very slow 1/2 250 130 --1 275 140 cool 2 300 150 --3 325 170 very moderate 4 350 180 moderate 5 375 190 --6 400 200 moderately hot 7 425 220 hot 8 450 230 --9 475 240 very hot

IMPORTANT HEALTH INFORMATION FOR WOMEN

Do you have feelings of inadequacy? Do you suffer from shyness? Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive? If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Cabernet Sauvignon. Cabernet Sauvignon is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions. It can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything. You will notice the benefits of Cabernet Sauvignon almost immediately and, with a regimen of regular doses, you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live. Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will discover many talents you never knew you had.

Stop hiding and start living. Cabernet Sauvignon may not be right for e ve r yo n e . Wo m e n who are pregnant or nursing should not use it. However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.

Side effects may include:

D i z z i n e s s , nausea, vomiting, incarceration, loss of motor control, loss of clothing, loss of money, loss of virginity, delusions of grandeur, table dancing, headache, dehydration, dry mouth, and a desire to sing Karaoke and play all-night rounds of Strip Poker, Truth Or Dare, and Naked Twister. WARNINGS: * The consumption of Cabernet Sauvignon may make you think you are whispering when you are not. * The consumption of Cabernet Sauvignon may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them. * The consumption of Cabernet Sauvignon may cause you to think you can sing. * The consumption of Cabernet Sauvignon may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people

Paddy says "Mick, I'm thinking of buying a Labrador ." "Really, ..." says Mick "Have you seen how many of their owners go blind?"

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PONDER ON THESE STATEMENTS 1. If you don't read the newspaper you are uninformed, if you do read the newspaper you are misinformed. -- Mark Twain 2. I contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle. -- Winston Churchill 3. A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul. -- George Bernard Shaw 4. A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money. -- G. Gordon Liddy 5. Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner. -- James Bovard, Civil Libertarian (1994) 6. Foreign aid might be defined as a transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries. -- Douglas Casey, Classmate of Bill Clinton at Georgetown University 7. Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. -- P.J. O'Rourke, Civil Libertarian 8. Government is the great fiction, through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else. -- Frederic Bastiat, French economist(1801-1850) 9. Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it. -- Ronald Reagan (1986) 10. I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. -- Will Rogers 11. If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free! -- P.J. O'Rourke 12. In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other. -- Voltaire (1764) 13. Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you! -- Pericles (430 B.C.) 14. No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session. -- Mark Twain (1866) 15. The government is like a baby's alimentary canal, with a happy appetite at one end and no responsibility at the other. -- Ronald Reagan 16. The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of the blessings. The inherent blessing of socialism is the equal sharing of misery. -- Winston Churchill 17. The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin. -- Mark Twain 18. The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world w i t h f o o l s . - - H e r b e r t S p e n c e r, E n g l i s h Philosopher (1820-1903) 19. There is no distinctly Native American criminal class...save Congress. -- Mark Twain

20. What this country needs are more unemployed politicians. -- Edward Langley, Artist (1928-1995) 21. A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have. -- Thomas Jefferson 22. We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office. -- Aesop

Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarves are not happy.

MySpanishome

We are looking for properties in Ametlla, Ampolla & El Perello. If you have a property to sell please contact: 977 446 655 +34 639 041 277 mobile Stephanie +34 679 499 316 mobile Steve Av. Generalitat 70, 43500, Tortosa, Tarragona, email: info@myspanishome.com www.myspanishome.com Geordie golfer and his wife walked into a d e n t i s t ' s o ff i c e . The Geordie said to the dentist, "Doc, I'm in one hell of a hurry. I have two mates sitting out in my car waiting for us to go play golf, so forget about the anaesthetic, I don't have time for the gums to get numb. I just want you to pull the tooth, and be done with it! We have 10am tee time at the best golf course in town and it's 9:30 already...I don't have time to wait for the anaesthetic to work!' The dentist thought to himself, "My goodness, this is surely a very brave man asking to have his tooth pulled without using anything to kill the pain." So the dentist asks him, "Which tooth is it sir?" The man turned to his wife and said, "Open your mouth Pet, and show him."

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Instruction and advice for the young bride

To the sensitive young woman who has had the benefits of proper upbringing, the wedding day is, ironically, both the happiest and most terrifying day of her life. On the positive side, there is the wedding itself, in which the bride is the central attraction in a beautiful and inspiring ceremony, symbolizing her triumph in securing a male to provide for all her needs for the rest of her life. On the negative side, there is the wedding night, during which the bride must pay the piper, so to speak, by facing for the first time the terrible experience of sex. At this point, dear reader, let me concede one shocking truth. Some young women actually anticipate the wedding night ordeal with curiosity and pleasure! Beware such an attitude! A selfish and sensual husband can easily take advantage of such a bride. One cardinal rule of marriage should never be forgotten: GIVE LITTLE, GIVE SELDOM, AND ABOVE ALL, GIVE GRUDGINGLY. Otherwise what could have been a proper marriage could become an orgy of sexual lust.

On the other hand, the bride's terror need not be extreme. While sex is at best revolting and at worse rather painful, it has to be endured, and has been by women since the beginning of time, and is compensated for by the monogamous home and by the children produced through it. It is useless, in most cases, for the bride to prevail upon the groom to forego the sexual initiation. While the ideal husband would be one who would approach his bride only at her request and only for the purpose of begetting offspring, such nobility and unselfishness cannot be expected from the average man.

Most men, if not denied, would demand sex almost every day. The wise bride will permit a maximum of two brief sexual experiences weekly during the first months of marriage. As time goes by she should make every effort to reduce this frequency. Feigned illness, sleepiness, and headaches are among the wife's best friends in this matter. Arguments, nagging, scolding, and bickering also prove very effective, if used in the late evening about an hour before the husband would normally commence his seduction. Clever wives are ever on the alert for new and better methods of denying and discouraging the amorous overtures of the husband. A good wife should expect to have reduced sexual contacts to once a week by the end of the first year of marriage and to once a month by the end of the fifth year of marriage. By their tenth anniversary many wives have managed to complete their child bearing and have achieved the ultimate goal of terminating all sexual contacts with the husband. By this time she can depend upon his love for the children and social pressures to hold the husband in the home. Just as she should be ever alert to keep the quantity of sex as low as possible, the wise bride will pay equal attention to limiting the kind and degree of sexual contacts. Most men are by nature rather perverted, and if given half a chance, would engage in quite a variety of the most revolting practices. These practices include among others performing the normal act in abnormal positions; mouthing the female body; and offering their own vile bodies to be mouthed in turn. Nudity, talking about sex, reading stories about sex, viewing photographs and drawings depicting or suggesting sex are the obnoxious habits the male is likely to acquire if permitted. A wise bride will make it the goal never to allow her husband to see her unclothed body, and never allow him

to display his unclothed body to her. Sex, when it cannot be prevented, should be practiced only in total darkness. Many women have found it useful to have thick cotton nightgowns for themselves and pajamas for their husbands. These should be donned in separate rooms. They need not be removed during the sex act. Thus, a minimum of flesh is exposed. Once the bride has donned her gown and turned off all the lights, she should lie quietly upon the bed and await her groom. When he comes groping into the room she should make no sound to guide him in her direction, lest he take this as a sign of encouragement. She should let him grope in the dark. There is always the hope that he will stumble and incur some slight injury which she can use as an excuse to deny him sexual access.Then he finds her, the wife should lie as still as possible. Bodily motion on her part could be interpreted as sexual excitement by the optimistic husband. If he attempts to kiss her on the lips she should turn her head slightly so that the kiss falls harmlessly on her cheek instead. If he attempts to kiss her hand, she should make a fist. If he lifts her gown and attempts to kiss her anyplace else she should quickly pull the gown back in place, spring from the bed, and announce that nature calls her to the toilet. This will generally dampen his desire to kiss in the forbidden territory. If the husband attempts to seduce her with lascivious talk, the wise wife will suddenly remember some trivial non-sexual question to ask him. Once he answers she should keep the conversation going, no matter how frivolous it may seem at the time.

Eventually, the husband will learn that if he insists on having sexual contact, he must get on with it without amorous embellishment. The wise wife will allow him to pull the gown up no farther than the waist, and only permit him to open the front of his pajamas to thus make connection. She should be absolutely silent or babble about her housework while he is huffing and puffing away. Above all, she should lie perfectly still and never under any circumstances grunt or groan while the act is in progress. As soon as the husband has completed the act, the wise wife will start nagging him about various minor tasks she wishes him to perform on the morrow. Many men obtain a major portion of their sexual satisfaction from the peaceful exhaustion immediately after the act is over. Thus the wife must insure that there is no peace in this period for him to enjoy. Otherwise, he might be encouraged to soon try for more. One heartening factor for which the wife can be grateful is the fact that the husband's home, school, church, and social environment have been working together all through his life to instill in him a deep sense of guilt in regards to his sexual feelings, so that he comes to the marriage couch apologetically and filled with shame, already half cowed and subdued. The wise wife seizes upon this advantage and relentlessly pursues her goal first to limit, later to annihilate completely her husband's desire for sexual expression. On the Conduct and Procedure Of the Intimate and Personal Relationships Of the Marriage State For the Greater Spiritual Sanctity Of this Blessed Sacrament And the Glory of God by Ruth Smythers Beloved wife of The Reverend L.D. Smythers, Pastor of the Arcadian Methodist Church of the Eastern Regional Conference Published in the year of our Lord 1894 Spiritual Guidance Press, New York City

32 email: info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977 457 201


Using Technology, both in Product and Delivery of Service. How many people pay tens of thousands of euros for their beautiful swimming pool, then hardly use it because it is too cold to swim in? Calyenty has been providing quality pool heating solutions for several years now with an impressive install base and dealers all over Spain, Portugal and France. We specialise in pool heating and realised early that pool heat pumps are by far the most efficient and economical method of heating a swimming pool – compared to electric, gas or solar. The maths is simple – the technology we use converts each unit of electrical energy into up to SEVEN times the calorific heat output to warm your pool. We have our own branded range of pool heaters and regularly consult with the factory to utilise the latest technology and component advancements. Calyenty relies heavily on technology, not just for its products, where the latest developments are important to keep solutions optimised for performance and value, but for the day to day running of the business too. We have always used the internet and our website to promote our business and its products and services but up until recently this has been mainly brochure ware, with just pictures, specifications, prices etc. Calyenty has recently introduced a much broader product range and is currently going through a complete strategy change regarding how we use the internet to promote all these products and maximise the value that we can provide to our customers. The aim is to make our web presence far more interactive for the benefit of all those who use it, not just to provide a sales platform, but a complete swimming pool information portal. Our new website uses a structure based on CMS, which stands for content management system. It is much simpler for us to now demonstrate existing products and services bring information up to date, promote new products, run special offers and so on, so the main website is always fresh and offers information that is always current and accurate. We have a live customer support line button on there too, which uses Skype to create a direct link, either voice or text, so a browser can ask direct questions about product specs, prices, support, delivery etc. in real time. We have also now linked our main website to our new Facebook page – Customers can use Facebook to upload pictures and comments about their pools, experience with Calyenty etc. – customers can interact, benefit and learn from other users of our products and services. Finally we are using Twitter - follow “The Pool Doctor” who will be tweeting regularly with tips on all aspects of keeping your pool perfect - the tweets will be directed to our “Blog” where the tip will be covered in greater detail, for instance -combating algae blooms, how to clear a cloudy pool in 24 hours, converting to salt water - and so on. We welcome you to visit us at calyenty.com and “like” our Facebook page, ask us a question or leave us a message.

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Spain’s active gardeners and authors living in Spain for 25 years.

Surviving the Spanish Summer

At the time of writing it’s still only 7th June but we have already experienced 41 degrees Fahrenheit and no rain is yet forecast. Will we get rain or not. Will we continue to have no rain until the autumn as happened in the mid eighties. It’s anyone’ guess. For sure the monthly thunder storms of the early nineties is a thing of the past and the gota frias of mid september are now most likely to be one or two months later. With a generally mature garden we only started watering the flower garden on the first of June and then only where necessary once a week. Naturally some vegetables in containers are best watered every two days but many are best flooded once a week. As we planted a dozen additional fruit and nut trees this Spring these need watering with five litres of water twice a week. If leaves droop in July this can be doubled with little effort. The main thing is that we are coaching roots to search for nutrients and water, not giving it to them on a plate. This way they develop good root systems which will reduce our gardening efforts in the future. Already the considerable shade we have in the garden from high trees and hedges is invaluable. Deep shade becomes the outdoor workshop as well as the place for lunch, siestas, reading newspapers and books and thinking about the content of newspaper articles and new books. Apart from going indoors to sleep the interior of the house is rarely visited and when it is it is a cool below twenty degrees centigrade temperature for the wooden shutters are closed all day to keep the sun out in traditional Spanish style.

caused few summer problems and work. For those who live in apartments blinds and awnings transform the life for a persons pets and plants. As explained and illustrated in our book ‘Apartment Gardening Mediterranean Style’ awnings and blinds make the growing of a wide assortment of flowering plants, herbs, fruit and vegetables very possible, indeed easy if you read and take on board the practical advice given in the books. Lastly dust the sunhat and wear it when working and wandering around the garden after 10am until sundown. Do most of the essential summer garden work between six am and ten am plus watering in the evening as the sun goes down. An afternoon siesta will enable you to catch up on sleep and restore energy levels for evening social life. So be prepared to enjoy the Spanish summer. Correctly planned it can be enjoyed without escaping to the unpredictable weather of northern and central Europe.

By the way an hour in a hammock is a relaxing time to browse through our books Your Garden in Spain, Apartment Gardening Mediterranean Style, Growing Healthy Fruit in Spain, Growing Healthy Vegetables in Spain and Living Well from our Mediterranean Garden. They can be obtained from high street and internet bookshops and also via our website www.gardeninginspain.com with a special offer. (c) Clodagh and Dick Handscombe www.gardeninginspain.com June 2012. My daughter asked me for a pet spider for her birthday, so I went to our local pet shop and they were £70! "Blow this," I thought, "I can get one cheaper off the web."

Once the sun goes down shutters and windows can be opened to achieve a night time cooling breeze across the bedroom. Having come to Spain twenty five years ago w e b e c a m e accustomed and acclimatised to living without air conditioning or indeed winter central heating. We came for the generally liveable climate and did not attempt to establish an expensive electricity driven UK office and home artificial climate. Likewise generally we chose plants that

34 email: info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977 457 201


Medical Terminology Translation

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The true origins of Well Dressing are lost in the mists of time.

According to many sources, it developed from a pagan custom of making sacrifice to the gods of wells and springs to ensure a continued supply of fresh water. Like many folk traditions, it was later adopted by the Christian Church as a way of giving thanks to God for His gift to us of water. Tradition has it that it took on a special significance in 17th century Derbyshire as various villages, notably Tissington, gave thanks for their deliverance from the Plague which had decimated nearby Eyam. In truth they had been spared by the altruism of the inhabitants of Eyam, who quarantined themselves while the disease, accidentally introduced in a package of clothing from London, ran its deadly course. Of course, this does not mean that the other villages has any less cause to express their grateful thanks. In the early days, the dressing of wells would have taken the form of simple arrangements of flowers and other natural materials. In this form it takes place today in many parts of the world. The unique Derbyshire tradition of elaborate pictures made for the most part of individual flower petals pressed onto clay covered boards seems to date from Victorian times, when there were many movements afoot to revive and enhance old folk traditions. The earliest recorded examples are in Tissington, but the tradition quickly spread to other villages. Sometimes, as in Youlgrave, the Dressings appeared at the village taps (pumps or fountains) to celebrate the arrival of piped water; hence the reason

why they are sometimes known as Tap Dressings. One example of Tap Dressing was in Endon in the mid19th century, possibly as early as 1845. Endon is in Staffordshire, thus disproving the commonly held belief that Well Dressing beyond the boundaries of Derbyshire is a recent phenomenon. Like Tissington and Youlgrave, Endon continues the Well Dressing tradition to the present day. Another commonly held misconception is that Tissington is always the first Well Dressing of the year. This used to be true; Tissington has kept to the tradition of holding its Well Dressing Festival on Ascension Day, while the next group of dressings typically occurred at Whitsun. With the introduction of May holidays on fixed dates, however, a number of venues now hold their events in the early part of May. Because Ascension Day is a moveable feast, these can occur before of after the date of Tissington. Quite a number of town and villages have a long standing tradition of Well Dressing going back to the late 19th or early 20th centuries. Others have come and gone over the years, but the last few decades of the 20th century saw a great revival of the craft, with many villages in Derbyshire taking up the tradition. Villages in other counties did so too, often as a result of a former Derbyshire resident moving there. A kind of peak was reached with the Millennium Year when everyone seemed to pull out all the stops to make a great celebration. After that a slight malaise seemed to set in and a number of established venues disappeared from the calendar. Writing nearly a decade later, I am happy to be able to record another revival under way; although we may still be losing a few old established and much loved venues, many more new events are seeing the light of day each year.

36 email: info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977 457 201


Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish Why are sardines the stupidest fish in the sea? Because they climb into tins, close the lid, and leave the key outside !!!

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Notices from around the world. In a Bangkok temple: IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN, EVEN A FOREIGNER, IF DRESSED AS A MAN. Cocktail lounge , Norway : L A D I E S A R E R E Q U E S T E D N O T T O H AV E CHILDREN IN THE BAR. Doctors office, Rome : SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES. Dry cleaners, Bangkok : DROP YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS. In a Nairobi restaurant: CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER. OLIVE 66X92-trazado.indd 1

18/04/12 On 16:45the

main road to Mombassa, leaving Nairobi : TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE. On a poster at Kencom: ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO WE CAN HELP. In a City restaurant: OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS. In a cemetery: PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES

Spain-UK-Spain Fortnightly Service

Single Item to Full House move Do your online UK Shopping (Tesco,Asda,Argos etc.) delivered to our UK address and then to your door in Spain Motorbike Movements with Full Bike Insurance email jasonpettman71@hotmail.com Tel 0044 7930243407

38 email: info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977 457 201


www.la-cala-realty.com info@la-cala-realty.com 977 493 540

La Cala Realty Promoting Proper ty in L'Ametlla De Mar and Sur rounds Ref. A 3 117

Ref. A 3 192

Price. 395,000€

Price. 360,000€

Four bedroom villa overlooking the sea, just 100 metres from the beach. 2 bathrooms with showers, open plan kitchen, sitting room / dining room with fire place, store room, garage 23.89 m 2 , balcony and terrace upstairs. Porch 20.36 m 2 , pool 39m 2 , 50 m 2 cellar, barbecue.

Four bedroom villa, more than 250 m 2 . Built on a 983 m 2 . plot. Built in 2006 by a builder for his own use, using only top quality materials and finishes. Barbecue, 29 m 2 pool, large garage, spacious kitchen, lounge with dining area, sun lounge, utility room. This property has to be viewed.

Ref:A 3 476

Ref:A 5 12

Price. 450,000€

Price. 170,000€

Villa with annexes and pool on an 860 m 2 plot 6 double bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, barbecue, porch, garage, 3 kitchens

Two bedroom apartment with balcony and sea views, close to the marina and Auction Fish Market.

Re gistre d'agents immobiliaris de Catalunya. aicat 2389

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spanglish?-answers next month 1.

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spanglish?-JUNE- answers

How to Solve Sudoku Puzzles Sudoku doesn't require any special math skills or calculations. It is a simple and fun game of logic -- all that's needed is brains and concentration. 1. Fill the grid so that the numbers 1 through 9 appear in each row. 2. Fill the grid so that the numbers 1 through 9 appear in each column. 3. Fill the grid so that the numbers 1 through 9 appear in each 3x3 box. 4. A complete Sudoku puzzle contains the numbers 1 through 9 in every row, column, and 3x3 box. This month, one thats medium. good luck

40 email: info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977 457 201


Traditional Stained Glass Workshop in Tortosa Renaissance Festival 2012 I t is very appropriate that this years Renaissance F e s t i v a l i n To r t o s a w i l l feature a traditional stained glass workshop for the fourth time. After all, the Craft Guilds were a powerful force in medieval and renaissance societies. Th is year in which Tortosa hosts the Presidency of the “Network of Jewish Communities in Spain” we will be exhibiting 3 new stained glass panels in homage to “Tortosa – City of the Three Cultures” i.e. Christian, Jewish and Islamic. Let us now consider the role of stained glass in medieval and renaissance times. Of course it played a key part in the glorious development of their architecture. It allowed the walls of the cathedrals to soar ever higher from earth to sky by reducing the weight of the walls due to the inclusion of larger and larger areas of stained glass. St ained glass basically consists of two elements – glass and lead. This paradox of combining the densest of metals with the most translucent of materials has always fascinated me – and still does 40 years on. Glass is generally thought to have been invented about 3000 B.C. and its discovery may well have been accidental. In a poetical s t o r y. P l i n y t h e E l d e r e x p l a i n s t o u s i t s mythical origins. According to the Roman scholar – when a group of Phoenician nitro merchants were about to cook their meal on the mouth of the river Beli they used bricks of nitro to prop up their pot above the fire. When the bricks were heated up and they fused with the sand on the beach, they saw a liquid start to flow around the fire. They had discovered glass! Le t’s move on now – about 3500 years in fact and consider Lead. We have to bear in mind that in the 6th century, glass for windows was

only made by blowing, spinning or casting and therefore only relatively small (from our point of view) flat pieces were available hence the idea of using a framework of lead to hold together the pieces of glass may well have been inspired by the art of the goldsmith and the cloisonné enameller. Im agine, for example a man watching a goldsmith at work. With the alert, empirical mind of the experimental scientist, he sees how easily the goldsmith bends strips ( or cloisonné) of gold around pieces of colored glass t o hold t he m toge t he r in a patterned cluster. Knowing that colored glass could, by the Middle Ages, be made in relatively large pieces (from his point of view – at that time), he suddenly thinks of lead (a cheap and malleable metal) instead of gold, which could hold a pattern of glass panes as a jeweled window rather than as a jeweled brooch. And the first stained glass windows? Traces of the birth of stained glass are scanty. Already in the 6th century, for example St Gregory had the windows of St Martin of Tours in France glazed with colored glass. The oldest still existing stained glass windows are the “five prophets” in Augsburg Cathedral, dating from the late 11th century. We trust you will enjoy the festival! Bronson Shaw 977444915 - bronshaw@tinet.org Traditional Stained Glass Workshop Festa del Renaixament - 19th to 22nd July 2012 C/ Nou del Vall, no. 5 – patio (near cathedral) Hours of opening Thurs 6pm to 10pm Fri/Sat + Sun 11am to 2pm + 6pm to 11pm Directors – Bronson and Sebastian Shaw Sponsor and Organiser - Grup d’Esplai de Blanquerna de Tortosa.

CAR BOOT SALES / MERCADILLO Sunday/Domingo, JULY 8th & 22nd 10am till 6pm Antiques-Moble's-Furniture - fridges - cookers - pictures - pots, pans & old tin cans - you name it and we will get it.

Car Park Free, to Look Free and Stalls 5 EUROS! no food or drinks without permission

At Mora Caravans C12, km 61 Mora La Nova to Ginestar road Call Ken or Bev on 977 400 375 or 659 418 317 or 660 584 222

NOTE to Buyers & Sellers We at Mora Caravans have the right to refuse entry.

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personal classifieds GENERAL Kawasaki Strimmer for sale TH43 Petrol , 75 Euros … 659 674 689 Mobile a/c unit, low wattage 60€, white gas hob 40€, Round table & 4 chairs cane/upholstered 60€, double bedstead pine 30€ tel: 672978968

GARAGE CLEARANCE in the Girona area. Scrap metal collected.

tel: 676 654 148 Gaddy Single Aluminium ladder 30€, dusky pink carpet 20€, 114 white tiles 20x20cms 15€, engineer's vice 20€, occasional double mattress 10€, new workbench 15€ tel: 672978968 Imitation marble basin/bathroom work surface cream 130x49cms 40€, Wall fitting ironing board with sleeve attachment 25€, single bedstead metal 25€ tel: 634495572 Round wood burning stove..35euros. 659 674 689 For sale ikea table with six chairs , good condition, teak effect table with red padded seating to match. offers around 75e contact 626876738

WANTED VOLUNTEERS help needed to look after the abandon dogs at ARCA near Tortosa. Please call Mave 678 975 816 if you can offer any assistance. Plus anyone interested in organising some fund raising for the dogs would be must appreciated. PLEASE HELP WANTED YOUR UNWANTED BIRDS budgies parrots etc will be given a good home tel 686299730 Free Rodent Catchers, 5 beautiful kittens, 2 ginger, one grey one black and one black/ brown, available mid June, Tel 638845837 or tuckermandi@yahoo.co.uk for photos

VEHICLES FOR SALE Isuzu Trooper, A full years ITV, Spanish Reg, 1200 Euros, 616 135 036

BMW K1200GT 2006 , a l l e x t r a s ( c o m p u t e r, ABS, ESA, heated grips and seats, electric windshield, xenon headlights. Luggage Panniers top box e tc . Impeccable. Only 13,000 km. Pearl white. Spanish registered.

Brand new Epson Cartridges (bought wrong ones) T0611/T0612/T0613/T0614 €10 telephone 977 456 915 1000ltr water cubes 60 euros each , 10 euros more for delivery call 632 352 112 Wind turbine, Hornet 1000+, 24v, up to 1.4kW, in good working order, 300 euros. Stephen 636 682 993. Bidet 25€ , Waterskies 95€, Water pump 75€ and dog guard 20€ B & D Hedge trimmer in working order. 20€Tel: 618199417 Aluminium patio sets, table (70 x 70) and 4 chairs, 6 sets available, 50 euros each. 654 193 474

WANTED Wanted Washing Machine phone 663 921 172

ANIMALS Horse Wanted. Must be quiet and novice ride min 15hh bay or darker. Loving home awaits. Tel 647 136 336

Offers 9500€ Call 977 059 364 VW Polo 1.4 petrol 1997, old but in good running order; FRENCH REGISTERED, 350 euros Stephen 636 682 993

Mercedes Sprinter 314

minibus, 2002, 100 000km, petrol/ LPG, ITV July, Spanish reg., left-hand drive, 6 seats, clips for 3 more, 6.70m long, reversing camera, towbar, 2 sliding doors, stereo/CD, never used commercionally, excelent condition. lencastner@yahoo.com

3995€ Call (+34) 636 135 834.

42 email: info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977 457 201


PUBLIC INFORMATION

PROPERTY

Phoenix group set up to offer friendship, support and practical help. Meetings every second Tuesday of each month @ Bar Calxic (opposite Cinema Victoria, el Perello @ 11.00 a.m. All welcome. Phone Marge 977 267 779 or email phoenixhelpinghands@hotmail.com to find out more.

Flat to rent from 01/07/12. Mora d'Ebre. 2/3 Bedrooms. Big Kitchen/Diner. Terrace with Great views of Ebro. 325euros/month. 677613736.

St Christopher's Church, L'Ampolla have services every first & third Sunday of the month in the Catholic church at 12:30.

SERVICES L a r g e Va n S e r v i c e U K - S p a i n , C o m p u t e r problems rectified, VHS and photo negatives t o d i g i t a l , A g e n t s f o r A L E R T PA L A l a r m Cameras, Translations Catalan, Spanish and English. 977477367 www.alexanderpearson.tk C O N C R E T E PAV I N G S L A B S F O R S A L E | different designs, sizes and colours. Please ring for a competitive quote. Delivery service available. Also slab laying on request. Tel. 692 751 488 or 692 759 276. VAN SPAIN-UK-SPAIN Van going to UK Tuesday10th July return Monday 16th July. All shopping done at very competitive rates Asda, Tesco, Screw Fix, what ever you want I can shop for you and deliver back to Spain. Contact Les on 629 010 529 or lesvalblf@gmail.com

CAR BODY REPAIRS AND REPAINTING | all aspects of vehicle preparation and spraying. 20 years experience, references available. Competitive prices. Tel. 692 751 488 or 692 759 276. GENERAL BUILDER Over 25 years experience. Registered legal builder in Catalunya over 5 years. Bricklaying, plastering, tiling, plumbing, electrics, roofing etc. Tel. Jonathan 699 396 053

ENGLISH MECHANIC

Basic servicing, maintenance and repairs of vehicles and generators.

Tel. 977407990. mob. 699396053.

CAR BOOT SALE 2nd and 4th Sunday of the month. Situated Hipaca Escornalbou, Vilanova D'Escornalbou Arrive 9am starts 10am Bar and Restaurant no fresh produce allowed Contacts Cosme 620 215 772 or Sylvia 665 159 781

Casas Moviles Spain S.L We buy & sell all types of mobile homes. Problems with campsite? Can't pay the rent or just want to sell? call Suzi on 616250727 or e mail info@Casas-moviles.es

A.R.C.A. BOOT SALE

at the dogs home in TORTOSA. SUNDAY 8th JULY. SELLERS 10:00am BUYERS 10:30am Stalls 5 Euros Please come along & support us. Call Mave 678975816 for more details The Bathtub Test During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director how do you determine whether or not a patient should be institutionalized. 'Well,' said the Director, 'we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub.' 'Oh, I understand,' said the visitor. 'A normal person would use the bucket because it's bigger than the spoon or the teacup.' 'No' said the Director, 'A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window?'

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business card directory

THE

MOBILE HOMES FROM 800 EUROS.

FOR SALE, 2 plots of land l'Ametlla de Mar excellent situation and access just off the N340 going into the village of L'Ametlla. Clean flat land with olive trees and carobs. Adjacent properties have mains electric and mains water. Sea and mountain views Totally fenced in, just 2km from L'Ametlla de Mar. Plot 1 approx 6600 m2 only 39,500 euros Plot 2 approx 4500 m2 only 34,500 euros. Call to view or more details: 977 059 420 or 660 823 423

44 email: info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977 457 201


LIVE PRESS

business card directory

NEW BUILDS

REFORMS

EXTENSIONS

Williams Construction REGISTERED SPANISH BUILDER - NIE PROVIDED

Tel: (+34) 616 135 036 APDO 274, L’Ametlla de Mar

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business card directory

you relax...

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MySpanishome Your English Estate Agents In Tortosa Fully Registered

www.myspanishome.com M1316 - Bitem–River Ebro Property with Cedula D’Habitabilitat Nestled between the River & Canal 2 beds, shower room, kitchen, lounge with woodburner, Master bedroom with French doors leading to patio area, Tiled pool area, fabulous garden full of fruit trees, veg, flowers etc. Caravan for rental or guests. Price: 165.000€ M1311 – els Ports/ Roquetes Traditional style house with mezanine 2/3 double bedrooms one en suite, kitchen/diner, wood burner, main showeroom, sun terrace room. bbq, pool, sat t.v Mains electricity and water connected. Registered productive olive grove of 31662m2 Price of 152.000€

M1241 - L’Ampolla 157m² Villa With Cedula D’Habitabilitat Bedrooms 3 Bathrooms 1 Lounge, terrace with SEA VIEWS! New fitted kitchen Plot of aprox 1388m2 Sale Price: 210.000€ M1096 – Parellades/ Roquetes Lovely Country House of 156 m.² Bedrooms 2, Bathroom, Dble Garage, Pool, Elec & Water Courtyard & Workshops. 2000m2 fenced garden Price: 225.000€ M1312 – Freginals 132m2 Villa on two floors with entrance leading to enclosed sun/terrace/dining room, entrance hallway to fully fitted kitchen, 2 double bedrooms (one being large mezanine), spacious lounge with woodburner and many special features, newly fitted shower room with large glass fronted shower. Gasoil Central heating installed. Price 195.000€

M1276 – Xerta Village house with 3 beds 1 bath Lovely reformed riverside village house over 3 floors with roof terrace overlooking village & Church. Price: 80.000€

M1118 – El Perello Magnificent Masia! 10 mins drive to village and only 20mins to beach! 2 Beds 2 Baths 95 m2 built 17.000 m2 plot size immaculate condition, newly renovated, many special features,rustic style Price: 170.000€

M1294 – Roquetes Casa de Camp – 5 mins from town! 15000m2 Olive farm. Casa of 90m² for finishing. Electricity Electric gates Stunning view of Mont Caro & surrounding countryside. Price: 55.000€ M1285 – Mas de Barberans WITH CEDULA D'HABITABILITAT Country House of 162m² for complete refurb. Flat land partially fenced just 2km from village. 6554m² plot Price: 59.000€

Av. Generalitat 70, 43500, Tortosa, Tarragona, Spain email: info@myspanishome.com

M1305 – El Perello Stunning views of Sea & Delta 160m2 Country House on two floors set in fenced and gated land of 10.734m2. 3 Bedrooms 2 Bathrooms Furnished Fenced & Gated Price: 135.000€

+34 977 446 655 +34 639 041 277 +34 679 499 316

48 email: info@the-olive-press.com Tel: 977 457 201

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