preschoolers [3–5 years]

Georges de Mestral…what a guy…a real smarty pants. Know who he is? This Swiss engineer’s 1941 invention has changed footwear for kiddos to the delight of parents, teachers and daycare providers everywhere. Mr. de Mestral is the creator of VELCRO! Easy, quick and a kiddo “I can do” dream. Only problem is there comes a time in every individual’s life [usually the time between early elementary school and roughly retirement age] when Velcro shoes just aren’t cool. So, thank you Mr. de Mestral, but our preschoolers gotta learn to tie those laces.

to tie or not to tie…

Around 4 to 5-years-old, preschoolers gain the fine motor skills, coordination and the ability to follow multiple step directions, all of which are needed to tie their now shoes. Now let’s not sugarcoat anything here. Teaching shoe tying can be…well…painful for all parties involved. Here are a couple tips to get those laces snug:

• technique choices The “bunny ear” method is the easiest to teach kiddos and then there is the standard method. Both start the same way: hold the two laces [one in each hand], place one under the other, and pull tight. For the bunny lovers, you then make a loop in each lace [get it…bunny ears], cross the laces and push one “ear” through the hole created by crossing the laces and pull tight on each bunny ear. For the standard method, make a loop with one lace, circle the loop with the other lace and pull it through the hole created by the circling. Pull tight on both loops and you’re done. Either way, use the method that works best for your preschooler and be patient.

• two colors better than one If your preschooler is really having a hard time knowing which lace should go where, checkout www.tyingisasnap.com. They offer bi-colored laces which aid in reducing lace confusion. They are also stiffer and smaller benefiting new learners’ little hands.

• keep at it Yeah, don’t think the day before kindergarten starts that you are going to initiate a crash course in shoe tying and your preschooler is going to pass with flying colors. It’s going to take some time and lots of practice. So, let him try and try some more and, with all your might, don’t jump in and tie his shoes for him all the time.

Growing up can be just plain confusing. First there is this whole English language where words can have different meanings based on the sentence they are in, not to mention letters like ‘c’ that can sound like a ‘k’ one time and an ‘s’ the next. And then there are “secrets.” Good thing we mama’s are here for phonics training and to explain good secrets from bad.

tell me something i don’t know

A secret is defined as something that is kept or meant to be kept unknown or unseen by others. Sounds harmless, but only if it’s a “good” secret. Here are tips to help you explain to your big kid how to know when to tell and when loose lips sink ships:

• surprise! A good secret is like a surprise. It feels good to know, but there is a time when the secret “runs out” or it has a time limit. Give him examples like a gift for Christmas or a surprise birthday party. No one is hurt by a good secret, there are no bad feelings and eventually it isn’t a secret anymore.

• tell a don’t tell Explain to your big kid there is nothing he can’t tell you. If he is asked to keep a secret that makes him have bad feelings [afraid, unhappy, scared, nervous, worried] or feel like there are butterflies in his tummy, he has to tell you even if he said before he won’t tell. A secret that can hurt someone or himself, is a secret that shouldn’t be kept. Someone being bullied or hurt, stealing, or someone touching him in a way that makes him feel unsafe or just plain yucky is a bad secret. And if anyone threatens him if he tells a secret, he needs to tell a trusted adult right now!

• no trouble Make it clear to your big kid that if he tells you a secret [good or bad], he isn’t going to get in trouble. If anything makes your big kid sad or feel uncomfortable, he needs to know he doesn’t have to keep secrets from his mama.

If you’re looking for a book to help you out, consider Do You Have A Secret? by Jennifer Moore-Mallinos. The book covers good and bad secrets, how to tell the difference, and the importance of telling the secret if it makes them feel bad.