a peacefulpassing

story by | dr. amy anderson

Loving a pet is easy. Making the decision to let a pet die peacefully is not. Whether it is a beloved pet of 15 years, or a young puppy or kitten with a tragic medical problem, you may find yourself second guessing what the right thing is to do. Euthanasia [which literally means “good death”] is a very controversial term in the human medical field, but it is common practice and often perceived as a “gift” in the veterinary field. It puts a limit on pain and suffering, allows families to grieve in a controlled manner, and permits a beloved pet to die with dignity. Euthanasia

Journeying Home

Spring Conference 2013

Featuring noted author, educator and grief counselor Dr. Alan Wolfelt

Understanding Your Grief: Touchstones for Hope and Healing

Tuesday, June 11, 7-9 p.m. Ramada Plaza & Suites, Fargo

Free and open to the public. No registration required.

Daytime conference for health care professionals will be held

Wednesday, June 12. Visit our website www.hrrv.org/ journeyinghome for more information and to register.

Sponsoredinpartby: The Forum is a decision that must be made in conjunction with your veterinarian and family members. Choosing if or when to end a beloved animal’s life can be heart wrenching, but it may also be the most responsible and compassionate thing you can do.

how will I know when the time is right?

When a pet loses interest in normal daily activities, like greeting you at the door after a long day at work, running to the food bowl at dinnertime, or grabbing the leash to go for a walk, a visit to your veterinarian is recommended. These can be early warning signs of illness and deteriorating health. Chronic or acute pain almost always affects an animal’s behavior. When your dog no longer has a desire to eat his usual amount of food or your constant lap companion is uninterested in keeping you warm while you read the newspaper but prefers to hide under a bed or behind the couch instead, it might mean he is losing the battle.

With a chronically ill pet, death typically occurs over a several-month period. During the initial stages [one to three months out] you will start to notice significant weight loss, dull eyes, poorly groomed fur, dehydration, and gastrointestinal changes such as constipation or diarrhea. As the time nears, approximately one month out, you will notice more extreme weight loss, a declining appetite, irregular breathing patterns, increasing solitude and decreased interest in playing. Oftentimes the eyes will start to develop a thick mucusy discharge. In the final few days pets will become extremely emaciated, barely responsive, have dull and sunken eyes, and very foul breath. Euthanasia is acceptable at any of these stages. We often say, “When the bad days outnumber the good days, it is probably ‘time.’”

If you know that your pet is suffering from a chronic and/or terminal disease, it is best to think about your plan if the time comes that euthanasia must be considered. You may decide that “time” will be when he stops eating, when he can no longer go outside to relieve himself under his own power, or when he can’t get comfortable at night, to name a few. If you have already discussed the procedure with your veterinarian, and considered your options, then making the final decision at this time will be a little bit easier. It is most important to remember that, in the case of a severely ill pet, the PET’S quality of life must be the main factor in deciding to euthanize. It can be hard to let go of a beloved friend, but we must not be selfish and allow him to suffer unnecessarily for our own emotional needs. By defining the point at which you will make “the decision,” you have thereby placed boundaries on the suffering you will allow your pet to endure. will my vet tell me when it is time? where does the procedure take place?

When your veterinarian brings up euthanasia, it is often because he or she feels your pet is suffering. Most veterinarians believe it is a decision that must be made among family members with the medical information provided by the doctor. If a veterinarian RECOMMENDS euthanasia, then it probably means that she is 100% certain your pet will not survive his current condition, the animal is suffering and there is no longer anything that can be done to ease the pain and discomfort, or you have waited too long.

In most cases, euthanasia is performed in the veterinary hospital. This is typically the best place for such a procedure because the equipment and assistance needed is close at hand. You may choose to be present throughout the entire procedure, stay only through sedation [ which is often done to relax an animal before the procedure], or simply leave your pet with the caring doctors and staff, knowing that they will give him the level of respect and care every pet deserves at this time.

At West Fargo Animal Hospital, we are currently in the process of developing a home euthanasia and hospice-care portion to our practice. We feel strongly that pets need the best and most advanced medical care throughout their lives. However, when that time comes to an end, they also deserve to die with dignity and respect in the most comforting and caring way possible. We are staffed and equipped to perform euthanasia in your home if requested. An at-home procedure must be planned in advance, and discussed with our doctors prior to the time, in order to be sure this is in your pet’s best interest. Home euthanasia can be a good option for very large pets who have become immobile and also for pets who experience extreme anxiety when visiting the veterinarian.

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Saying goodbye and preparing for euthanasia by gathering some comfort items for your pet can be comforting for you as well. Humans grieve in many different ways. As a veterinarian, I have seen many heartfelt letters, drawings from children, and special mementos to be included with a pet for burial or cremation. Some individuals like to tell stories about their pets or simply hold them tight. For some owners, spending time with a pet after euthanasia is helpful as well. Most veterinarians will accommodate these needs as best they can. find children younger than about 8-years-old should not witness the procedure.

how will our family get through this?

The grieving process is a very personal experience, encompassing many stages or cycles. Healing cannot be forced nor hurried and certainly there is no “normal” timeline. Encourage family members, especially children, to express their thoughts and feelings. Excluding or protecting children from this process may only complicate or prolong their grief. And although ignoring pain or keeping it from showing may only prolong your pain, it can be difficult for children to see their parents grieving deeply. If you experience extreme grief after the loss of your pet or even at the thought of it, there are counselors who can help you through this difficult time. Discuss it with your veterinarian and she can put you in touch with both local and national grief resources for pet loss.

The other pets in the household may also notice the sudden absence of their good friend. When an animal passes we recommend leaving blankets, bowls, pet beds, and even a kennel out for a couple weeks after the loss. This allows the remaining pets to get used to the idea that their friend is no longer around. They may wander around the house looking for their companion, sniff the bowls or kennel, and even sometimes curl up in the deceased pet’s blanket. Allowing them to do this is an important step for living pets to process the loss of a friend. Pets can exhibit different signs of grief, ranging from restlessness to loss of appetite. Our pets thrive on normalcy, so try to stick as close to your normal routine as you can in the weeks following the loss of a pet.

Our pets play a valuable role in our lives. The love and devotion they give us is unmatched. As you deal with your pet’s chronic illness and possible euthanasia, lean on your trusted veterinarian, family and friends. Making a decision in the best interest of your pet’s welfare can be a difficult life experience, but it is also a sign of the love and respect you have for your beloved companion.

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Child Abuse Prevention Month www.stopchildabusend.com www.pcamn.org

Help strengthen families and prevent child abuse and neglect.

11

Safe Kids

701.780.1856 www.safekidsgf.com

Did you know that 4 out 5 car seats are used incorrectly? Could your child's be one of them? Safe Kids Grand Forks, in partnership with Altru Health System and Rydell GM Auto Center, offers a monthly car seat check-up event on the second Thursday of each month. This event is from 4:00pm-7:00pm, its free and no appointments are necessary. Come to Rydell's and certified car seat technicians will check on your seat and ensure your children are riding safely.

13

Spencers Theatre of Illusion

701.777.3076 www.cfa.und.edu

Magic is no longer merely about baffling the audience by doing something seemingly impossible. We've seen it all before. Magic these days is about spectacle, drama, danger, and personality. Kevin and Cindy Spencer are the masters of this new magic theatre. They have redefined the art of illusion by combining original theatrical elements with cutting edge illusions and are one of the most sought-after illusion teams in the business. Don't miss this spectacular performance! 7:30pm start at the Chester Fritz Auditorium [3475 University Avenue, Grand Forks]. Tickets: Adults: $25, Students: $15, Child: $10

13 &20

March for Babies

701.235.5530 www.marchofdimes.com/northdakota

Join the March of Dimes at the Scheels Sports Arena in Fargo on April 13th or at the Grand Cities Mall in Grand Forks on April 20th for the March for Babies. The money raised will support lifesaving research, community services, education and advocacy that help babies get a healthy start.

13

Heart and Sole Time Capsules www.plainsart.org

Andy Warhol loved to collect EVERYTHING and seal his treasures in boxes he called “time capsules.” You can take a walk in Andy’s shoes by grabbing a shoe box and worn out pair of footwear to create a sculptural “time capsule” that will have you stepping back in time offered by the Plains Art Museum from

1:00pm-3:00pm. Low-temperature glue guns will be used, and parent assistance will be required for younger kids. Both parent and child can make a “time capsule” of their own or you can partner up! You decide! For ages K+. Fee: $11 museum members, $14 non-members.

17

Hurray for Hoovestock

701.277.9240 www.redriverzoo.org

Visit the Red River Valley Zoo [4255 23rd Ave S, Fargo] from 3:15pm-4:45pm to find out why camels are called "ships of the desert." Discover more about the endangered Takin. Explore the differences between the types of hoovestock at the zoo, from the llamas to the horse, and discuss which ones don't mind the cold weather.

18

Storybook Science

218.284.3400 www.moorhead.k12.mn.us/Schools/ECFE/ We will connect a familiar story with a science activity. The class is based on the book “Story Time Slime” by Julie Gintzler. Parent discussion will center on math, science and more. For ages birth to kindergarten at Probstfield Center of Education [2410 14th St S, Moorhead], listen to “A Rainbow of My Own” by Don Freeman 5:45pm-7:15pm. Register online.

18

Our Family is Having a Baby!

701.234.5570 www.sanfordhealth.org

Designed for "brothers and sisters to be," of the age 3 to 7 years to aid in adjusting to the addition of a new baby in the family. The class includes: characteristics and actions of a newborn, feeding the new baby, care of a newborn using demonstrations, doll play and a tour of the Family Birth Center. One or both parents should accompany kids to class at Sanford Auditorium [801 Broadway North] from 6:30pm-8:00pm. Preregistration is required.

20

Gigantic Rummage Sale

701.433.5360 www.wfparks.org

Over 175 vendors will be selling antiques, crafts, collectibles, closeout items and garage sale items at the Veterans Memorial Arena [1201 7th Ave E, West Fargo], 7am-2pm. Free parking. To register for a booth please contact the park office. Concessions will be available. $1.00 admission [17 & under free]