11 minute read

BREAKING AWAY

Breanna Myles

11th Grade • Richard T. Crane Medical Preparatory

“I love you.” Those words easily slip out of his mouth. He says it so smoothly that I can’t help but be pulled back in and forget all that he has done to me. Those same lips that have kissed another woman, those same lips that tell me I could never survive without him, are the same lips that tell me he loves me. And I am a fool to get drawn back in and submit to him once again like a moth to a flame.

I woke up to the bright sun shining into the room. I looked at the clock hoping there was more time to sleep before my alarm went off. It was 6:29 a.m., one minute until my alarm went off.

“Bloody hell,” I mumbled as I sluggishly moved to get out of bed. After wiping my eyes with my hands, I pressed the snooze button on my alarm. Looking back at the bed I saw that Sebastian had already woken up. I stared at the empty space on the bed with mixed feelings as I thought about us. Does he really love me like he says he does? If he did, then why did he cheat on me and then say it was all my fault? Why does he continue to tell me that now that my parents are no longer alive, that he’s my only family and the only one who cares for me? I turned back around and looked at my hands. Is it really my fault? Am I really not enough for him? I’ve tried my best to please him, but it’s never enough.

“Tasha.”

479

My head snapped up at the sound of Sebastian’s deep gruff voice. Seeing my reaction, he smiled. That same enticing smile that always pulls me back in. His black hair was dripping wet and he was only wearing a towel around his waist. He must have just got out of the shower.

“Are you done staring?” he asked, walking over to the closet to get his suit.

“Oh…s-sorry. I just got lost in thought,” I replied.

“What are you doing up so early?” Sebastian asked. “You aren’t planning on going to work, are you?”

Secretly rolling my eyes, I turned to face him. He hates the idea of me working. He expects me to stay in the house and clean like “a woman should,” so sexist.

“Yes, I am,” I replied in the most confident voice I could manage. Sebastian finished putting on his suit and silently turned to me. He no longer had that calm and collected look in his eyes, they looked dark and terrifying. He slowly moved towards me, like a predator stalking his prey. I tried to back away but soon bumped into the wall. Having nowhere else to go, I stared back into his piercing gaze.

“You know how I feel about you working. I don’t appreciate the fact that other men will be looking at you,” he said in a low voice.

Not knowing what to say, I looked down at the floor. He grabbed my chin roughly, making our eyes meet.

“You belong to me and no else until the day you die. And if you ever try to leave me, well…that’s not something I have to worry about, right?” He had a thin smile on his lips but his eyes

480

weren't smiling at all. They were telling a different story than what the smile on his face was implying.

I slightly nodded my head. I knew I didn’t want to anger him any more than he already was because I knew I wouldn’t get away with this without being hurt in some type of way. He huffed and released my chin, then turned away from me.

“I’ll allow you to go to work today. But remember, you’re nothing without me. No one loves you like I do…and neither could your dead parents. I’m the only one who will.” Stating that, he grabbed the car keys and left the room, not looking back.

I stood there waiting until I heard the start of his car and the sound of the car pulling out of the driveway. Looking at the floor I began to mumble to myself, “I want to escape you, but I need you. I want to break away, but there’s no one else to run to.” I walked to the giant mirror that sat on my wall and stared at my reflection.

“How can you say you’re my only family but treat me as a pet? How can you say that you love me but with those same lips kiss another woman and utter sweet nothings into her ear? Am I really that weak to you?” I uttered these things in the silence of the empty bedroom. No one to answer these questions. No one to dry these tears. No one to soothe this aching pain.

I arrived at work two minutes before it was time to clock in. I love working here at the cafe. The smell of cupcakes and fresh coffee always calmed my nerves. It was just something about that smell that reminded me of home, a place where I never knew the feeling of loneliness or sadness. Mom and Dad were my home. But they passed away in a plane crash 3 years ago. That’s when I first met Sebastian. I was so lost and blinded that

481

I didn’t see the red flags sooner. I walked into the brightly lit homey cafe, making my way to the back room so that I could get ready to serve the customers. The feelings as I walked to the back were welcoming and comfortable. As I walked past the customers they gave me warm friendly smiles and looks. Finally reaching the backroom, I placed my purse into the closet and removed my apron from the hook. Walking over to the mirror, I straightened out my apron and tied my black puffy curly hair into a high ponytail. I let out a sigh as I looked myself over in the mirror.

I positioned myself behind the counter ready to serve the customers.

“Tasha! Finally, you’re here!” a cheerful high pitched voice called from behind me. I turned to see my best friend Amanda standing there with her arms folded and a happy smile on her face.

“Yeah, I’m here! I really missed this place. It’s way better here than being cooped up at home, ya know?” I let out a light chuckle. Amanda is the only person I can really confide in when it comes to my problems. She is always there to listen whenever I have a problem. Sometimes I envy how she could be so perfect with her friendly extroverted attitude, bright green eyes, and her ability to make friends with anyone.

“I really began to worry about you. Your boyfriend called in saying you were quite sick and that you wouldn’t be in for a while.”

“Yeah…that’s what happened.” I didn’t want to tell her that he refused to let me leave the house last week because he got jealous over a guy staring at me in the supermarket.

482

“Anyways, let’s get to work.” I stood behind the cashier and greeted my first customer of the day.

The workday flew by quickly and by the time I knew it, it was time for us to close up. It was only me and Amanda left in the cafe. We always cleaned and closed up the cafe together. As I was sweeping under one of the tables, Amanda approached me.

“Tasha, I really think we need to talk”

I stopped sweeping. “About what?” I asked.

“Sebastian. I know he’s been isolating you and I know he’s been abusing you.”

I stood there shocked, wondering why she would even bring it up, why would she even care.

“I know you’re shocked but I need you to know that I care about you and I’ve noticed how much you try to hide that pain in your eyes. So please talk to me.”

We stood there staring at one another in silence until I finally found the courage to speak.

“He…he’s the only one I have left. If I leave, then where else can I go? Who else can I run to? Is there anyone to show me even the slightest bit of love? I’m a lost cause, Amanda, I’m nothing without him.”

“That’s what he wants you to think. He wants you to submit to him like some sort of dog. He uses your pain against you. I’ve known you for two years and I can tell you that he has never helped you with your inner demons, he has never treated you like the queen that you are, and most of all, he has never made you actually feel loved. You say he’s your only family, but you

483

seem to have forgotten that I have and will always be there along the way with you. Whether times get rough, I’ll stand with you. Please leave him. I will be right there to help you get through. Just please...free yourself from his grasp before it’s too late.”

As I listened to Amanda, tears began to well up in my eyes. She was right. He hasn’t helped me in any way. He’s only made me feel like a possession, but I was too naive to see that he only saw me as a possession. I easily forgave him after I caught him cheating because I believed I couldn’t be without him. If anything, Amanda has been more of a family to me than Sebastian ever was.

“Thank you, Amanda. You’re right. I can’t continue to go on like this. Family doesn’t hurt one another. If anything, family protects each other. Tonight is the night I break free from him.”

After we finished cleaning up and I changed my apron, I looked at the time on my phone. 9:45 p.m. Sebastian should be off of work and on his way home by now. “Alright, let's do this.” I got into my car and drove home anticipating what was about to happen next.

I arrived home and opened the door to the house. Not surprisingly enough I was greeted by Sebastian, and boy was he angry.

“WHERE WERE YOU! You were supposed to be back home twenty minutes ago!” He rushed towards me and wrapped his hands around my neck. I’ve never seen him this angry ever. His face was bright red and his breath smelled of liquor which could only mean he'd been drinking.

“L-l-let...me...g-go.” I tried to pull his big hands off my neck,

484

but his grip was too strong. I was beginning to lose my breath. I thrashed and kicked until I finally got enough strength to kick him in the gut. He doubled over in pain and I took advantage of his vulnerability and kicked him in the face. He fell over onto the floor, holding his head in pain. I made a run for the door, but just as my hand touched the doorknob, I was thrown to the floor and held down by Sebastian. He roughly slapped my face and then grabbed me by the neck again.

“Why don’t you understand who you belong to?! I take care of you, clothe, and love you! When I first saw you I knew I had to claim you as my own. You’re never going to leave me! I know you’ve been thinking about it!”

His eyes were dark and dangerous; he resembled a demon. I met his challenging gaze. I wasn’t about to give up, not right now I have to fight to free myself.

“No! I will never ever belong to you! I am not your pet, you will no longer restrain me from what I want to do anymore!” I screamed at him. I took a vase that had fallen onto the floor next to me and slammed it against his head, causing him to once again fall back onto the floor in pain. I ran out the door to my car and quickly hopped in. I locked the doors just in time. Sebastian recovered from the shock of being hit in the head with a vase. He pulled on the door handle and banged on the window like a mad man. As I started in the car, he smashed the window on the passenger side and tried to reach me. I stomped my foot on the gas pedal and the car violently lurched forward. As I sped down the street, I watched as he tried but failed to keep up with the car. After 10 minutes of driving, I finally arrived at the police station. Frantically, I raced into the police station and told them about my situation. They sent police officers to the house only

485

to find it empty. They searched the streets and found Sebastian hiding out in a cheap motel. He was arrested and I was finally able to once again be free. I now live with Amanda, my true family.

It’s not always blood that makes a family. It’s about being there and showing that you actually care for one another. Never settle for someone who makes you feel less than what you’re worth. Never allow anyone to use the excuse of “being your family” to justify their lies.

486

This article is from: