2020 RETROSPECTIVE
TH E SWAM P MO NS TE R A ND TH E CO VI D B OO G I E MA N BY: WESLE Y H UGGE T T
watching the sunset from their cars. Outside of California, governors also imposed harsh restrictions; Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer, who mandated a set of strange and bizarre rules, which included not being able to fish in a boat with 25 or more horsepower and not allowing “essential businesses” to sell products like paint and garden supplies. Gavin Newsom’s COVID rules arbitrarily restrict people’s freedoms. To allow the readers to fully understand how overthe-line our state regulations are, I will be listing all of the requirements to have a state-approved gathering. You cannot gather with three or more households, even if they are members of the same family; the host must then collect all mendment 1: Congress shall attendees’ names and contact information. make no law respecting an All gatherings must be held outside, establishment of religion, or however people are allowed inside to use the prohibiting the free exercise bathroom. When it’s time for dinner, Gavin thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, and his goons require that people be seated or of the press, or the right of the people 6 feet away from anybody else, and food peaceably to assemble, and to petition the must be served in single-serve containers. Government for a redress of grievances. According to the state health department website, there can be no singing or playing When the Novel Coronavirus first made its of wind instruments. Your gathering must way to America, people panicked, holed up be shorter than two hours and end by 10 in their homes. California Governor Gavin pm because we all know, the COVID Boogie Newsom became the first governor to Man only attacks in the dead of night. institute a lockdown order while reassuring everyone that “I don’t believe the people These guidelines probably seem hard to of California need to be told through law follow. Don’t worry, you’re not alone; even enforcement that they need to home isolate.” the person who made the guidelines has But two weeks later, the San Diego County had trouble following them. On November Swine Farm was writing tickets to people 6th, a photo surfaced that seemed to show Governor Newsom. Photo courtesy of CalMatters.
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