POTPOURRI February 2015

www.potpourrimagazine.com

5 Couples

Why Their Relationships Work

Custody of pets after divorce

Centre spot with Gervais Waye-Hive Our local Neymar

WAYS TO WEAR RED

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POTPOURRI

February 9

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Teaching Children to Love Themselves

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Every Beauty needs a beast

19 My Mother; My Worst Nightmare

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My Relationship with my…hubby

Eco-Cars is there such a thing?

The Team

Chief Editor: (1) Marie-France Watson | M: + (248) 2512477 | E: marie-france@seychellespublications.com Marketing: (2) Ineke Camille | M: + (248) 2520937 | E: ineke@seychellespublications.com Editor: (3) Lynette Botha | E: lynette@seychellespublications.com Freelance Writing: (4) Mawess Wirtz, (5) Kurt Gilbert, (6) Martine Gontier, (7) Hanifa Francoise Photography: (8) Suzanne Verlaque | POTPOURRI Photography Studio

La Plage

Graphics & Layout: (9) Olivia Michaud | W: www.angelcreativedesign.com

right on Beau Vallon Beach 1

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Potpourri Seychelles is published by Paradise Promotions Ltd Box 1539, Room 105, Aarti Chambers, Mont-Fleuri, Seychelles Tel: + (248) 4325215 | Fax: + (248) 4325216 | www.potpourrimagazine.com Printed by: ATLAS Printing Press LLC.

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From the

EDITOR

Photo credit: Suzanne Verlaque

Dear Folks, Many people in Seychelles are trying to decipher recent events that have made the news. These events have touched us, angered us and broken our hearts. As a concerned member of society I am no exception to this. I have observed hundreds of comments and debates and one thing baffles me; I am surprised by how many of us quickly state “what has happened to our country and our people?”, as if we as individuals exist separately from our country. It is a sensitive issue to address and the last thing I want to do is to offend anyone, but I do want us to think about it for a minute.

The more I think about it, the more I am convinced the issue of wealth has a huge role to play in the current social condition of our country;

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wealth segregation to be specific. I say this based on the increased begging I have noticed and a frustrating amount of complaints about the cost of living. I ask myself this: in our development, are we leaving too many people behind? While opportunities to prosper are there for those hungry enough to pursue them, is that option possible for everyone? I am well aware that every institution has their role to play in this but let us not simply dismiss these responsibilities especially if there is something we can do – even if we only make a difference in one person’s life. I have come to realise that my family’s prosperity means little if another family fails to prosper. What is the point of great material wealth if it results in a life where you have to look over your shoulder all the time, doubt every person you meet and question their intentions, triple check your doors every night because you feel unsafe. What’s the point? Financial success is uplifting and I will be a hypocrite to diminish it. All I am saying is at what cost?

Thank goodness February is the month of love which forces me to move on to a lighter note. How great is the cover this month? If you are reading this Elsa de Geus, thank you for bringing this couple to my attention some months back. While kick starting the research for our Real Couples feature, a photo of Mr and Mrs Nibourette was sent to us via Facebook. We knew instantly we wanted them on the cover. Along with five other couples, they share part of their love story in this month’s celebration of love on page 9. Love and relationships are no laughing matter and you will find out when you read the different stories that one thing is constant for all five couples – a commitment to make it work.

Like Tina says in the opening act of this issue, the greatest love is the one that begins within yourself. I am a firm believer in this and while many of us will be figuring out how to please our partners this month, don’t forget YOU. Treat yourself as well. If you’re happy you’ll rub it off everyone around you. A good ripple effect I would say!

For those of you visiting our beautiful islands this month, may you have a memorable holiday and be blown away by the Seychellois hospitality.

Chief Editor

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Cover Models Mr Leslie Nibourette and Mrs Carmelle Nibourette from La Digue

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1. Photographer: Marsha Dine 2. Concept: Joel Rose

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Musings of an Island Girl

by Tina Houareau

THE GREATEST LOVE AFFAIR

Do you love yourself? Do you really love yourself truly, madly, deeply?

So much that you just want to have a love affair with yourself?

If not, you need to. There is no other love like it.

As I age, I realise more and more how every decision I have made in my life is directly related to how much I love myself. How I approach situations, how I express love, how I embrace life – they are all connected to how in love I am with myself. But it was not always like this. There was a point in my life when I did not even know the meaning of self-love – and the decisions I made at that time inevitably reflected that inadequacy.

Doesn’t it seem like we are always so consumed with romantic love, how relationships form, what makes them last, what makes them fail, what makes them beautiful, what our friends think of them, and so on? Do not get me wrong; I think that is fine because romantic love with another person is, indeed, a fantastic thing. But what about us? Why don’t we spend more time thinking about having a love affair with ourselves?

Without self-love, trying to establish and sustain any other type of loving relationship is, at best, an extremely challenging process. Self-love is perhaps the most difficult affirmation practice, and not just because it makes us feel like heading straight for self-help aisles in bookstores. It is easier said than done. It means letting go of all the obstacles to your life force, all those inherited belief systems, and taking responsibility for your own pleasure.

We are taught from childhood that love is a game we either win or lose— it is not. We believe that other people are the source of our happiness or unhappiness—they are not. At 38, I know this to be a fact: you can form a lasting, forgiving, passionate relationship with yourself, for better and worse, there is nothing—and I mean nothing—to keep you from having one with somebody else.

Let these words drift between us for a minute. Think about how often you have blamed someone else for your own unhappiness. Now figure out what fuels your inner fire and nurture it every day. There is nothing sexier, healthier, or more potent than a vital life force. And from where I sit, basking in my own glow, I have no doubt that the greatest love affair you can ever have is with yourself.

Tina Houareau is a Seychellois living in the USA with her young son. She is an Instructional Designer for Capella University, where she is completing her PhD in the same field.

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OPEN LETTER

“YOU HAD INSTILLED IN ME FROM AN EARLY AGE THAT CHILDREN WHO DISRESPECTED THEIR MOTHERS WOULD BE PUNISHED BY GOD; AND THAT MOTHERS WERE ‘ALLOWED’ TO SAY OR TREAT THEIR CHILDREN WHATEVER WAY THEY WANTED TO BECAUSE THAT WAS THEIR GOD-GIVEN RIGHT.” Dear mother, I read somewhere that a mother is the universe’s gift to you. The quote touched me deeply. It made me look at you slightly differently for a moment but more so, as a mother myself, it made me realise that I was the universe’s gift to my child.

Mothers are adored in every way.

And so it should be - right? A mother gives life, nurtures that life and is one of the constant factors in a person’s life. Nothing can be more special than a mother and her love. For some, even for most – maybe. But not for me.

I write this in an attempt to come to terms with what the universe gave me. I write this in an attempt to forgive myself for having failed for three decades to accept your bitterness and abuse. I write this in an attempt to move on and be happy because my world is more than just about me.

I have three boys whose emotional stability and happiness rest on my shoulders. I write this to remind myself that I have a choice and I choose to be free of you.

The thing with abuse that starts early on in one’s life is that a blurry line is created about what is normal and what is not. Verbal insults have been a way of life for me for as long as I can remember. The insults often had sexual undertones even if I were too young at the time to fully comprehend them; I am talking about being as young as 6 or 7 here. I will not lie and say that is all I recall from my childhood. The insults came when I was ‘naughty’ and were more a way of being reprimanded than anything else. All of this occurred in a bubble of what seemed to the outside world as a happy, church-going, helpful and generous family. It is of course true when they say that what goes on behind closed doors is often very different from what one might think.

Moving in with you again after university would be the start of a long and painful process of finally understanding the woman I had called mother for two decades. As I made attempts to establish a relationship with you I learned a thing or two about you. For one, your mother had been abusive. I never knew my grandmother and for the longest of time had been mesmerised by tales about this woman who knew how to put people in their place and never allowed anyone to take

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advantage of her. She was a strong character who liked her drink now and then. As stories unfolded ‘now and then’ turned into everyday, but it was always said in such a casual manner that it never occurred to me there was a problem until the day you let it slip, ‘she once took the only earrings I ever had as a child from my ears to sell in order to buy alcohol.’ What I felt at that moment has never left me. I seemed to have been the only person in the room at the time who thought there was something horribly wrong with that. I tried to question you about it on occasions after that, but you always escaped the interrogation; it would seem that despite having been in a grave for decades, my grandmother still frightened the living daylights out of you.

This insight into you certainly helped me sympathise with you. At that point, I had started to realise that you were somewhat of a bitter person and I had to make an effort to understand you and give you reasons to be happy. I often found myself making a renewed commitment to be a better daughter because I felt I wasn’t good enough or I slipped up and lost respect when we had a fight. You had instilled in me from an early age that children who disrespected their mothers would be punished by God; and that mothers were ‘allowed’ to say or treat their children whatever way they wanted to because that was their God-given right.

I did not question this for the longest of time, because there was never any physical abuse. The thing with verbal fights is that once you calm down, you move on and forget about it...There has been a lot of ‘forgetting about it’ in my life.

So what is this all about I can hear you ask? The insults, mother. All day long, you insult. I have caught you calling me every name under the sun. I have cried in secret, unable to understand why. I am married; I have a great job and three wonderful kids.

Why do you call me a whore all the time? Why do you call my friends prostitutes? As much as I understand you are a victim of abuse yourself and that the names you call me are all from a fictional place in your mind, you cause me so much pain and distress. I often stand helplessly and listen to your mumbles, telling myself I need to walk

away from listening but I’m unable to do so.

A month ago, I lost it. After listening to what seems hours of insults after you thought you had hung up the phone, I came over to confront you. I swear your face reminded me of the devil – I suppose while you’re at it you’re simply consumed by so much hate and venom that you physically change. In my anger I broke almost everything in your house. I could not stop. It is very possible that years of keeping the pain and hurt inside finally caught up with me. As I left my nasty piece of work behind, I sobbed uncontrollably and was consumed by so much fear; fear that I would turn out exactly like you.

If that were to happen, I would ruin the lives of my husband and my sons.

It did not take me long to realise that I had to break away from you. I have decided to simply put you to rest. I am thankful you gave birth to me but I refuse to accept that that gives you the right to destroy my life and any chance of happiness that I might have. People might talk; you certainly have a way of playing the poor little woman. But I simply do not care. I chose to be free of you; for me but more importantly for my sons.

Goodbye mother.

TF

Do you have something you need to get off your chest?

Something you desperately need to say to someone?

WRITE TO US; marie-france@seychellespublications.com.

All letters will remain anonymous.

REAL COUPLES

When love prevails…

By Mawess Wirtz

(as it should!)

The month of love is upon us and in it we have that glorious day at will either make or break relationships. To survive here are a few tips based on the lyrics of our favourite love songs.

Michele: I missed Roxy too much, after 3 years apart I had to come home. Roxy had always wanted his own Fitness and Health shop so I used my medical knowledge and he used his sport’s knowledge to make it happen. Then we got married too.

Potpourri: Was it difficult to come back together again? Since you now lived and worked together?

Michele: At first we had to get used to each other all over again, that’s when you realise that you have different ways doing things, you discover mannerisms and ….other things that you have to get used to again. Interestingly, the shop, we never disagree about. Roxy deals with all the supplements and sport’s accessories and I deal with all the over the counter medication and health snacks.

Roxy: We got over it and we planned our wedding and got married. We have now been married for 3 years and the Nature Plus Health Shop is a success, so we must be doing it right.

Potpourri: What advice would you give a couple who have to leave each other for work?

Roxy: Don’t do it.

Michelle: You have to be sure of the person, it is not easy.

Roxy and Michele live together and work together still, with SIMILAR WANTS they have been together for seven years.

ALL FOR LOVE … BRYAN ADAM

STAND BY YOUR MAN (OR WOMAN)…DOLLY PARTON

Roxy (39) and Michele (30) met at a time when both had decided to make a change in their lives. Michele had been a nurse and Roxy a teacher and they both had decided to join the Constance Ephilia Resort staff. It was there that they started a rollercoaster ride that had them living together, then apart, then together again.

Potpourri: At which point did you realise that you guys were serious about each other?

Michele: We never thought about it. We started off texting, he had given me his number for something and I texted him one day to tell him off about an incident and we just kept on texting, then we met and started dating and it just continued like that.

Potpourri: What was the worst thing you had to face as a couple?

Michele: After we had dated for a year, I had the opportunity to work abroad and it was such a good one that I took it.

Roxy: And we had a Skype relationship.

Michele: I had free internet but Roxy had to pay here so it got to be a very expensive relationship.

Potpourri: Where you discouraged? Was there a point that made you want to stop?

Michele: We didn’t fall out of love. We made it work. It was hard, especially when I had to travel into time zones like the US, when I would go to bed when Roxy woke up.

We had to time everything.

Potpourri: Why do you think you managed to hang on?

Roxy: Michele and I suit each other. We can be together, we can plan together and we are so good at it that we can even work together happily.

Potpourri: How did that happen?

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It’s 1966 on La Digue and a young man spots a young lady as he walks home from work, he can do nothing but look at her from afar every day because it will not do to talk to a proper young lady. After a while, the young lady notices the young man who looks at her everyday but it would not do for a proper young lady to speak with a young man. How does the story of 84 year old Mrs Carmel Jeanne Nibourette (nee Ernesta) and 85 year old Lesley Castor Nibourette end in 49 years of marriage then?

Potpourri: How did you and Mr Nibourette finally manage to date?

Mrs Nibourette: He had to ask my mother for permission. He had to come talk to me in my parent’s house too, where they could see us.

Potpourri: How did you know that this was the person that you would marry?

Mrs Nibourette: At that time I was a housemaid and he was a labourer at Anse Cocos. I knew that I would be well and happy with him. After we got married we took care of La Mission together. We worked there for 18 years and we had 10 children. After that we went to work for the social security office together. We worked together always then we retired together. We have always been together, here, in our house.

Potpourri: Did you ever fight, since you were together so much?

Mrs Nibourette: Yes, then we discussed it and fixed it. We wanted to be happy again.

Mr Nibourette: You have to understand the other person.

Know all their particularities and accept them.

Potpourri: What do you think made you last so long?

Mr Nibourette: We are both still alive.

Mrs Nibourette: I don’t think that we will have many couples lasting 49 years like we did.

We focused on our family and we raised our 10 children. We focused on staying together. It takes understanding.

Mr and Mrs Nibourette have 10 children, one of whom has passed away, with HARD WORK they are still together in that house on La Digue.

Jude Marie (36) met his wife Lyn (33) through church. With a union brought about by the almighty it is a small wonder that they have celebrated 11 years of marriage despite marrying at 23(Lyn) and 26 (Jude).

Potpourri: What were your first impressions of each other?

Jude: I was twelve and she was nine when we started coming together for Diocesan events.

Lyn: We grew close when we were both on the Anglican Youth Committee.

Jude: I was the chairman and she was the secretary and she would call to discuss the agenda before each meeting. I admired her, she was good at it.

Lyn: I thought he was just stubborn but when i was in my last year of

NEAR, FAR, WHEREVER YOU ARE…CELINE DION

When Francoise first saw Alan they were both doing their A levels at the Seychelles Polytechnicand they had ended up in the same biology class, more importantly they were both dating other people. At the end of their last year, both were now single so Alan plucked up the courage and asked Francoise out, then 3 months later he left to study abroad. The two now have an interesting story to tell about how to survive being in love while in two separate countries.

REAL COPULES

YOU RAISE ME UP…WESTLIFE

Polytechnique, he came back to Seychelles after his studies and finally asked me out.

Potpourri: What made you realise that this was the person for you?

Lyn: We were similar so we just clicked.

Jude: She compliments my weaknesses. She is morally and intellectually my equal. Also, she is so simple and there is never any fuss. She makes me a better Christian man than I would have been.

Potpourri: You married young. How was it like?

Lyn: Before we only had to please each other but then we became parents, we had a lot of new adult responsibilities and our relationship changed. We have to work to find time for each other, just the two of us and reconnect.

Jude: “Zis nou de tousel, personn pa remarke”….i never quite understood that song by John Wirtz. But Lyn and I, we like to talk about things. We could sit down and talk anything through. I like that about her. It makes us revisit why we wanted to get married frequently.

Potpourri: Why do you think that you have lasted this long?

Lyn: When we fight, quitting is never an option.

Jude: We separate the love, the emotions, what we feel for each other from the issue and argue it out. Also we are aware that married life is hard work. It is a lifelong commitment.

Potpourri: What is your marriage based on then?

Jude: When all the passion fades, the youth fades there needs to be a friendship that lasts, an easy entendre with that person that you want to grow old and wrinkly with.

Lyn: We are great friends. We can tease each other, him or than me.

Lyn and Jude have two little girls, Anaelle and Ariella, with FAITH they have been together for 14 years.

Then there are those love stories that tread like fairy tales. They are couples that we would all want to be, they have been together forever and they are happy, the epitome of what married life should be.

Potpourri: How long have you two been together since?

Fran: We’ll be together 6 years this June and we’ve spent most of that in two different countries long distancing.

Alan: I only get to see Fran 3 weeks every 5 months when she comes to visit me.

Potpourri: What are some of the challenges of long distance relationships?

Alan: Physical intimacy is clearly one disadvantage. The inability to go on dates, to share the same experiences, to not be able to do normal couple activity sometimes makes us feel we aren’t in a relationship.

Fran: Making up is the hardest thing for me, because we can only talk it’s easy to just switch off all lines of communication such as text, call, facebook etc, which makes even the smallest arguments long and hard to resolve.

Potpourri: How do you tackle these challenges?

Alan: Make the most of the time we do get to spend together. When she comes to visit I plan trips all around Malaysia attempting to cram as many dates in 3 weeks as possible.

Fran: We’ve had to understand that we can’t do silent treatment when arguing, it prolongs fights. We learnt the hard way to sit and talk it out there and then without beating around the bush.

Potpourri: What are some of the advantages of being in a long distance relationship?

Alan: It’s really helped us build on aspects of our relationship that we might have neglected if we were always around each other. You learn how to communicate, how to trust someone, and you really learn more about the person because you’re invested in getting to know them in order for this to work.

Fran: You learn to appreciate your partner more because you are spending less time with them. You get to figure out if you really love them for their personality or if you just were interested in their romantic gestures or whether you were more into the physical aspects of a relationship.

Potpourri: Do you have any advice for anyone thinking about having a long distance relationship?

Alan: This is a decision both of you have to make, you both need to be on the same page and have the same level of commitment to each other.

I would not advise someone to try long distance if their partner is not willing to. It definitely takes 2 people to make this work.

Fran: I would say try not to be overly sensitive. Respect each other’s schedules and time zones. You both still need your space but you do still need to make time for each other.

Francoise and Alan look forward to being together in one country soon, with COMMITMENT they have been together for five years.

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REAL COUPLES TOGETHER FOREVER...RICK ASTLEY

many girl admirers for my liking but once we were married, all we thought about was making a life together.

Potpourri: Why do you think you have survived this long?

Mr Pothin: She is a good wife and a great mother. I understand her. She makes my life easy. I never have to worry.

Mrs Pothin: Since we’ve been married I have never worked. I have always focused on taking care of my home, my husband and my children. We had seven girls and he took care of all us. Where else would one find such a man? It’s not easy living with seven girls and we have lived a humble life but we have always had everything we needed.

Potpourri: Do you ever think about the kind of marriage you have?

Mr Pothin: I remember when I used to go drinking with my friends on the weekends, we had a car and I would leave the car at home because I knew that Denise would follow me and bring the kids.

Mrs Pothin: I used to want to argue about the drinking. I NEVER argued in front of the kids, that is not for their ears, but at night when we went to sleep I would try argue with him. He’d just roll over.

Mr Pothin: We’ve never fought. She tries, I ignore it.

Potpourri: Is that a strategy you would recommend to other couples?

Mr Pothin: Yes. Mrs Pothin: No. Sometimes things have to be discussed.

Potpourri: What advice would you give other couples who hope to be married as long as you have?

Mr Pothin: I doubt they could. Times are hard nowadays; I could afford a home even if I wasn’t rich.

Mrs Pothin: You have to make a home. Take care of each other, of the kids when you have them, be united as a family. There needs to be discipline and a routine. I am proud of my marriage, we have had wonderful kids to show for it and even now we have never fought. We have always loved each other, I know everything about him.

Mr Pothin: And it is too late to divorce her now. (laughing) Mr and Mrs Pothin are still together after 53 years together in UNITY.

It all started with the traditional love letter for Mrs Denise Pothin (70) and Mr Clifford Pothin (78) then ended with 52 years of marriage.

Potpourri: How did it all start?

Mrs Pothin: I met him when I was 18. I was in the same sewing class as his sister and I saw him pass by, he noticed me and would smile at me but I ignored him. I was afraid of getting into trouble with my father but he was good looking and his sister assured me that he was nice.

Mr Pothin: When she didn’t talk to me, I wrote her a letter to make her heart flutter. I was good at that.

Mrs Pothin: He gave to his sister to deliver and she acted as our postal service. Then I allowed him to start walking me home.

Potpourri: Was it different to date during those times?

Mr Pothin: Yes. When I was dating her someone told her dad that I was a bad person and her parents would not let me see her again.

Mrs Pothin: Unfortunately for them because no AGE AIN’T NOTHING BUT A NUMBER...AALIYAH one had ever talked to me about love and sex, I was Round Table Seychelles hosts the regatta every year and every year they contribute the already pregnant. I told my parents that Clifford and I money raised to a charity, in 2010 they inadvertently also introduced the 19 year old Terry were getting married whether they liked it or not. (now 27) to the 25 year old Phillipa (now 32), who turned out to be his future wife.

Potpourri: Were you in love then?

Potpourri: What went through your minds when you first saw each other?

Mrs Pothin: We fell in love very quickly.

Terry: She’s hot!

Mr Pothin: I could have been with other girls but I Phillipa: Who’s that? But then I quickly lost interest because the friend I had with me wanted her. told me that he was younger than she was, and she was 20 at the time.

Potpourri: Was that the hardest thing you had to Potpourri: I take it that Terry didn’t take no for an answer? face?

Phillipa: He did not.

Mr Pothin: Yes. We never had issues after we were Potpourri: So Terry, it was love at first sight? married, all our issues were before then.

Phillipa (starts laughing) Mrs Pothin: I almost didn’t marry him. He had too Terry: My friends and I wanted to know who could have the oldest girlfriend and I knew how old she was because I knew a classmate of hers.

Potpourri: Please explain how the two of you end up married after this?

Phillipa: He asked me my number, I said no.

Terry: I kept asking, then on my 20th birthday she gave in. I even got a birthday kiss.

Phillipa: It took him 3 months but he wore me down. We started dating and the next thing I know he was staying with me.

Terry: Whenever I left I missed her so I stayed.

Potpourri: When were you official then?

Philippa: Even when we got married, five years to the day of our first date, we just decided then did it. We’ve never actually thought about it, we were just in love and being together was great.

Terry: The only thing we planned was our first child, everything else just flowed.

Potpourri: With 5 years difference in age and the man being the youngest, does it ever become an issue?

Terry: I only remember that she’s older than me once a year, on her birthday, when I have to ask her how old she is now.

Phillipa: Our little girl thinks that he’s 30 and I am 25. Sometimes she calls him grandpa.

Terry: Phillipa doesn’t act like she’s older than me.

Phillipa: I don’t think anyone else would get me like Terry gets me.

Potpourri: There is no downside to the age gap?

Phillipa: When we fight, we either just talk it through or decide whether it is an issue to fight about. It takes a lot of patience.

Terry: I’d actually advise young men to be with older women. When I met Phillipa I was living only for today, I always thought that I would deal with issues when they happened. Phillipa has helped me with being the best version of myself and I now plan for the future. I like who I am. I have achieved more than I thought I could.

Phillipa and Terry now have two girls, Hailey and Aimee, and with UNDERSTANDING they are going to celebrate their eighth year together.

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ROMANTIC GETAWAYS

In the mood for Whether you’re on a budget or able to splurge, here are five of our best romantic getaways for two.

By Lynette Botha Petit Amour Villas Island: Mahé About: Petit Amour villas are located close to bustling Beau Vallon on the North West side of the island. It’s in close proximity to amazing restaurants, little boutiques and is the perfect base from which to explore other areas of Mahe.

Accommodation: All rooms have access to a balcony or terrace, offering beautiful views of the surrounding area, complete with outdoor seating.

What to do: The friendly staff are on-hand to coordinate any types of activities you’d like; chat to them about coming up with an itinerary for a special day for two. From snorkeling to sunset boat trips or even a luxury yacht charter complete with romantic picnic.

Special touches: If you’re celebrating a special occasion, let the staff know so that they can arrange for flower petals on the bed, some chilled champagne in your room or anything else that may make the evening more special.

Most romantic room: The split level Master Suite has an Italian marble en-suite bathroom with a deluxe spa bath suitable for two, and views across the ocean, as well as a rain shower. Add a few candles and you’re all set for romance.

Romance rating: Contact details: Call: +248 2578039 / email: info@ petitamourvilla.com or visit www.petitamourvilla.com

Hilton Seychelles Labriz Hotel & Spa Island: Silhouette About: Located on Silhouette Island, a 45-minute boat ride from Mahe, Hilton Seychelles Labriz Hotel & Spa is a slice of heaven. A marine national park since 1987, Silhouette Island is home to a large and diverse range of indigenous fauna and flora, as well as rare species like the incense tree and sheaf-tailed bat.

Accommodation: Choose from garden, beachfront or hillside villas. Or if budget is of no concern, the presidential villa will make you feel like King and Queen for a day (or more!). All villas have their own outdoor areas complete with rain shower and epic views.

What to do: Why not head out into the ocean on kayaks to view the incredible surrounding vistas from the sea, hope on a bicycle and explore the island or lie side-by-side on pool loungers on the beach, sipping cocktails and enjoying the peaceful atmosphere.

Special touches: Let the staff organize a romantic picnic for two for you and your partner or head out on a champagne cruise as the sunsets over the sea and jungle.

Most romantic spa treatment: Book the indulgent two hour couple treatment in the comfort of the private spa suite for two. The treatment includes a soothing footbath, a tailor-made massage using aromatherapy oils, followed a harmonizing facial and completed with a glass of champagne on the private spa deck.

Romance rating: Contact details: Call: 248-429-3949 / email: sezlb.info@hilton. com or visit http://www.hiltonseychelleslabriz.com

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ROMANTIC GETAWAYS

Banyan Tree Seychelles Hotel & Spa Island: Mahé About: A shaded palm-fringed drive leads you down to the entrance of the Banyan Tree Hotel. A few steps away lies Intendance Bay, known as one of the most beautiful on the island. It’s a long stretch of coastline that is as great for swimming and lounging as it is for walking.

Accommodation: Choose from a variety of Creole-inspired villas that are all tastefully and comfortably decorated – the views are phenomenal no matter your villa location; either forest or beach and sometimes, a bit of both.

Special touches: Ask the staff to organize a romantic candlelit dinner in your villa. Or why not book a romantic special? Book the Sense of Romance Package with a minimum stay of two nights at the Water Terrace Suite and enjoy daily breakfast for two, one candlelight set dinner at Waterlight Court for two, afternoon tea at Jiuxian Lobby Lounge for two, and one 90-minute massage session (inclusive of 60min massage and 30-min calm time) for two at Banyan Tree Spa. Most romantic dish: A luxury Lobster dinner is always a winner.

What to do: Go for a sunset stroll along the beach with your partner, lounge at the pool, arrange a romantic meal in a secluded spot or enjoy a couple’s massage at the spa.

Romance rating:

Valmer Resort

and soak up the sun or visit one of the many art galleries situated not too far from the hotel.

Island: Mahé About: Located on the south of the island, Valmer Resort is a family run hotel, in a peaceful area, a short walk away from the beautiful and popular Baie Lazare beach. A recent refurbishment of the hotel means rooms have been updated and facilities improved, ensuring guests enjoy the best hospitality during their stay.

Accommodation: Choose from a garden studio, deluxe villa, junior villa suite or the beautiful pool villa, by far the most romantic room, with your on private infinity-edged plunge pool – perfect for a nighttime dip.

What to do: Enjoy sundowners at Gaulette Bar, situated alongside the resort’s beautiful infinity pool, take a leisurely walk to Baie Lazare beach

Contacts details: call: +248 438 3500 / email: Seychelles@banyantree. com or visit www.banyantree.com

Special touches: Book the pool villa and while you enjoy supper at Le Palmier Restaurant, ask the staff to place candles around the edge of your private pool, scatter rose petals around your room and organize a bottle of champagne on ice for a real touch of romance when you return from dinner.

Most romantic drink: Enjoy the resort’s signature cocktail, The Valmer.

Romance rating: Contacts details: call: 248 4381 555 / email: valmer@seychelles.net or visit www.valmerresort.com

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ROMANTIC GETAWAYS

Le Chateau de Feuilles Island: Praslin About: Privacy and comfort are the number one priority at this Relais & Chateau establishment. Only a short boat journey from Mahe to Praslin, the hotel and spa is located a few steps from the beautiful and tranquil Anse Marie-Louise beach. On weekends, guests have full use of the hotel’s private island Grand Souer, home to two of the most beautiful beaches in the world.

Accommodation: There are only nine exclusive rooms available, ensuring your privacy while away; all rooms have 180 – 360 degree views of the island and surrounds. All rooms are equipped with luxury amenities, like Nespresso machines, complimentary toiletries and WiFi access, not that you’re likely to be on the Internet while surrounded by so much beauty.

What to do: Head to the spillover Jacuzzi with a 300º view of paradise, day or night; enjoy a couple’s hot stone chakra massage at the spa, to re-balance your energy or explore the rest of beautiful Praslin.

Special touches: The hotel is happy to organise a romantic helicopter ride, boat trip or island-hopping expedition to offer an experience of a lifetime.

Most romantic meal: Let the hotel surprise you and tempt your tastebuds with a unique four course meal, carefully prepared with the freshest ingredients and attentions to detail.

Romance rating: Contacts details: call: 248 429 00 00 / email: feuilles@relaischateaux.com or visit www. chateaudefeuilles.com

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An ordinary kind of love

By Preethi Nair

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I fell in love with his arms! Strange, but true! I thought his arms were, quintessentially, the kind of arms that I would want hugging me tight and keeping me warm in the middle of the night… so, that did impress me much! And I was right!

Hubby and I are quite private and writing about our relationship is kind of hard; we’re definitely not another Kim and Kanye!

But like most other ‘happy’ couples out there we are pretty much alike. So really, our relationship is a doozy - a special kind of something – similar to the one you, dear reader, probably have with your significant other.

To say he is my better half is pretty much an understatement, because he is my best half; all that I do wrong, he does right!

They say opposites attract, and since we are poles apart the attraction is magnetic! Pardon the pun!

He is the island boy and I’m the city girl, and our worlds could not have been more different.

But like the shepherd boy finds out in The Alchemist, “… when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it”, I found my man.

I would often joke to my friends that I would marry a pilot, and even had a sketch of my ‘dream man’ in uniform! Although the ‘dream man’s’ resemblance to my hubby wasn’t too great (mainly because it was a lousy sketch), I found in hubby all the qualities I had hoped for in my soul mate. Perhaps the universe was listening to my wishes, after all. So here we are - two very unlikely peas in a pod.

He is the serious to my funny.

He is my baby daddy.

He is the gourmet chef while I’m great at burning rice.

And most of all, he is my son’s best buddy.

He is the calm to my hysteria.

He is the order in my chaos!

As a wife it is my right to complain and argue with my hubby - and I definitely exercise this right on a daily basis! We sometimes agree to disagree on everything, like arguing about what to eat for dinner or where; the placement of toilet paper, which movie to watch or how many movies he’s watched without me, why I use his hairbrush, or who is the better driver. The list goes on. But we always know when to quit and how to make up! A little time and distance apart always gives us amazing perspective. After all, absence makes the heart grow fonder!

When you’ve been with a person long enough, it’s easy to understand why people start mistaking you for twins... Ok, I exaggerate. Perhaps siblings, rather. We sometimes end up completing each others’ sentences - the rivalry and the camaraderie is definitely there – and according to some, we actually resemble each other (that’s probably just wishful thinking).

Hubby is my “flying” fisherman.

He is my personal “hot and handy” handyman.

Hubby is Mr. Fix-it.

When he’s around, I don’t have to worry about emergencies, as the help is ever ready. But thanks to him being constantly on the move, he has taught me how to fix a leak, repair broken toys, change a tyre and polish the car, mostly over long distance telephone calls and differing time zones. He has taught me to be a fixer-upper during a crisis and ever ready for any emergency toy-related procedures.

He is my ‘babe’.

He is the good cop to my bad cop.

He is the executor of my ingenious ideas.

As a father, hubby is a fully hands-on kind of guy. From changing nappies, to building planes out of lego, to flying kites, the father and son bond fills me with pride and the occasional tinge of jealousy because I can’t be part of the ‘Boys Only Club!’

Hubby and our son couldn’t be more alike in looks and temperament and equally so when it comes to exasperating me! But I love these two crazy boys all the same - unconditionally!

Every relationship is special in its own way because of the love and kindness, the care and encouragement, the trials and tribulations, the joy and heartache that we share with one another.

Hubby and I have had the best of times and the worst of experiences but we always manage to weather the storm, and I couldn’t have asked for a better friend and advisor. Hubby gives me the freedom to be myself, always encouraging me to become a better version of me. He gives me strength when the chips are down.

The love and care he puts into each of his endeavours continues to amaze me, and more than a decade later, I continue to discover things that I never knew about him, like the fact that he’s an expert with clay modelling, and that he’s able to play the drums and dance the Sega like a pro.

Like I said before, we’re not Kim and Kanye. We have an ordinary kind of love, one that’s not OTT or filled with PDAs. We usually make public appearances alone…and one of us is always lucky enough to get photographed with good looking women!

With that said, his smile still makes my heart skip a beat.

His snoring still keeps me awake at night.

His patience keeps our love alive.

But most of all, having his arms around me just makes everything all right!

For that I’m forever grateful and glad that the universe was listening.

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C

difficulties we ended the weekend dancing to the likes of SBTRKT, Cloud Control and Alt-J underneath illumination flares and soaring kites lit by neon. What a wonderful way to wrap up the Christmas break. Until next time, if you can’t be good, be good at it!

Honeydew Spritzer You will need...

renée martin designs

hristmas is the perfect time to reconnect with family.

However, this year I found myself at a loose end whilst my little sister partied in Ireland and our parents took a luxury cruise around Asia. Luckily I have some of the best friends imaginable and had soon been invited to join their families for many of their own Christmas celebrations. After drinking and eating far too much over Christmas and New Year, Jo and I drove down to Margaret River along with her gorgeous cocker poodle, Hilly, for a weekend of wine and music. We stopped off at the Eagle Bay Brewing Company for some local pale ale and drank it in the last of the sunshine, gazing out at the surrounding farm. We arrived at her holiday house in Yallingup, a gorgeous stone homestead surrounded by acres upon acres of virgin bushland. I made us some moreish Honeydew Spritzers to kick off our festivities and we chatted late into the night.

The next day we lathered ourselves in sunscreen to protect against the 43 degree celcius weather and stopped at Smiths Beach for a quick dip in the ocean before heading to Busselton for the first day of the Southbound music festival. Making our way to the main stage, we swayed in the sunshine to the likes of Jagwar Ma, George Ezra, Temper Trap, La Roux and Empire of the Sun. When we needed a break from the harsh rays we chilled out with glasses of bubbly in the champagne tent or headed over to the silent disco to show off our dance moves. This warmed us up for the headliner, Salt-N-Pepa, who didn’t disappoint by playing all of their old hits. Let’s just say my “running man” made a rare but comical appearance!

The next morning we woke up with smiles on our faces and aching feet. Deciding to take it easy and avoid heat exhaustion, Jo and I explored some of the local wineries, including Lenton Brae and Knotting Hill, where I picked up a case of rather delicious 2010 merlot as a late Christmas gift for my papa. We stopped for a lunch of ceviche and grilled prawns at Hayshed Hill then headed back to the festival. Despite some technical

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30ml Absolut Exposure Honey Melon and Lemongrass flavoured vodka 100ml lemonade Slice of fresh ginger Squeeze of fresh lime juice Handful of crushed ice Slice of honeydew melon and stalk of lemongrass, for garnish

What to do...

Pour the flavoured vodka over the crushed ice into a highball glass. Add the ginger and squeeze of lime. Top up with lemonade, stir well with the stalk of lemongrass and garnish with a slice of melon.

Brigitte Monchouguy is a Seychelloise legal practitioner with a passion for social journalism. She is happiest when travelling, with interests in music, art, theatre and architecture. She also dabbles in mixology and will be sharing cocktail recipes along with her monthly escapades.

A Fresh Start - London to Mahé

By Daniel Balkwill

Dan works for Kreol Wines - a new wine shop located at Eden Plaza on Eden Island, specialising in Argentinian, Australian, French and South African products. Opening hours are 9-6.30 Mon-Fri, 10-6 Sat & 10-4 Sun.

I

t never fails to surprise me how rapidly time flies. Barely have the Christmas and New and February has 22Year’s festivities AUGUST subsided 2013 | POTPOURRI arrived already. The sounds of presents being unwrapped and champagne bottles being uncorked have been usurped by the gentle twang of Cupid’s bow as Valentine’s Day or ‘The Day of Fools’, as someone I know has dubbed it, looms upon us once again.

Cupid was the Roman god of desire, erotic love, attraction and affection. A winged creature, to represent the often fickle, flighty nature of romance, his amorous modus operandi was to shoot arrows with either sharp golden or blunt leaden tips. Those struck with the golden arrows would instantly be filled with uncontrollable desire whereas those hit by the lead ones would experience only aversion and the desire to flee.

“I WOULDN’T DESCRIBE MYSELF AS AN INCURABLE ROMANTIC BUT I’M NOT A HARD-BITTEN CYNIC EITHER. I TEND TO VACILLATE BETWEEN THESE TWO EXTREMES DEPENDING ON WHAT MOOD I’M IN. I THINK VALENTINE’S DAY AS A CONCEPT IS ADMIRABLE ALTHOUGH I’M NOT SUCH A FAN OF THE COMMERCIAL ASPECT OF IT.”.

Personally, I wouldn’t find being hit by any kind of projectile remotely erotic and I certainly wouldn’t condone rampaging around firing arrows at people but his unconventional methods do highlight the importance of sending out the right signals to a potential paramour. Get it right and your feelings might be reciprocated. Get it wrong and they’ll run a mile. There’s definitely a valuable lesson to be learned there.

I wouldn’t describe myself as an incurable romantic but I’m not a hard-bitten cynic either.

I tend to vacillate between these two extremes depending on what mood I’m in. I think Valentine’s Day as a concept is admirable although I’m not such a fan of the commercial aspect of it. My preference is to buy the best ingredients I can find, get a bottle of the finest wine or champagne (or both!) I can lay my hands on and cook a special meal. I find this a far truer expression of demonstrating my love for someone than visiting a restaurant.

Sometimes Valentine’s Day can accentuate the occasional loneliness and pain of being single. This time last year I found myself having a candlelit dinner with company. However, the candles were necessary due to a temporary power cut and my companion was the dog. He had spotted that I was having chicken for dinner and knew I would share it with him if he sat a couple of yards away from me with his tongue hanging out. It was a distinctly unromantic experience although the chicken was nice.

Singletons can extract a degree of comfort from the knowledge that their luck will inevitably change for the better. Failing that, it is also perfectly acceptable to seek further solace in a glass of wine, their favourite movie (tip: avoid romcoms) or a family-sized tub of ice-cream.

Just don’t make a regular habit of it.

For those of you who find themselves enjoying a romantic meal with someone’s adoring gaze upon them, (narcissists: please note that this does not count if you are looking in the mirror) appreciate and enjoy the good fortune that Cupid has bestowed on you.

H

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A lot of the time when we face problems or difficult situations in our lives, we tend to see the wrongdoings of others by making exceptions of ourselves. We blame others, get angry at them and ask them to change. This can be especially true in different kinds of relationships.

Sometimes to resolve a conflict, the best thing to do is to look within and maybe discover our contribution to the problem. Looking within is about examining all things about ourselves, rather than continuously analysing the external impacts in our lives and blaming others.

I’d like to share an interesting story from Humans of New York that is a real eye-opener about how we view others and judge their actions.

Interviewee: “Who are you?”

Teacher: “I’m a philosophy professor.”

Interviewee: “If you could give one piece of advice to a large group of people, what would it be?”

Teacher: “Never make an exception of yourself.”

Interviewee: “What does that mean? “ Teacher: “People like to make exceptions of themselves.

They hold other people to moral codes that they aren’t willing to follow themselves. For example, people tend to think that if they tell a lie, it’s because it was absolutely necessary. But if someone else tells a lie, it means they’re dishonest. So never make an exception of yourself. If you’re a thief, don’t complain about being robbed.”

By Alexandria Faure

Alexandria Faure is a freelance writer and has a degree in Drama & Theatre Arts and hopes to pursue a masters in the near future. She is passionate about preserving the unique Kreol culture and heritage of Seychelles, and her hobby is researching different cultural aspects of Seychelles and the historical stories behind them. She hopes to share ideas and thoughts drawn from her life experiences in her articles.

Better Living WELCOME CHANGE With Célia Ponzo

Change. What comes to mind when you think of change? Think of something in your life that will suddenly change, something that you are so used to that will suddenly be different. What feelings does it create in you?

What makes us want to change something? It could be that a situation makes us unhappy, it could be that we are not satisfied with a current situation or it can simply be that we want to dive into the deep end and cut the routine of something which we know too well.

Often the word change creates feelings of uneasiness, anxiety but and most of all, fear. As human beings we tend to like routines - small habits - as this is what makes us feel comfortable. Stepping out of our comfort zone is always risky because we are facing the unknown and that notknowing can be both exciting and scary. One reason why we tend to not want to change is resistance.

An effective approach is to meet the resistance with compassion and believe that perhaps there’s some wisdom in the resistance and that there is a self-protective mechanism that rises up in a healthy way. We all have the tendency to resist change to some extent, especially when the change means a break from the only way we’ve ever done things.

Naturally we are constantly changing human beings, these changes often happen unconsciously and we’re unaware of how much we are changing with every action we take and every experience we have.

However when we have to consciously make a change in our life we freeze, we spend days and months and years pondering and dwelling upon the change whether - it’s the right thing to do or whether its just best to stay the way we are.

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Take a moment and write down all the things that you feel you would like to change. It could be anything from your current job, your relationship with a friend/colleague/partner, your home, your lifestyle, your attitude to life, your character, your bad habits, the colour of the walls in your home. The list is extensive and it’s up to you too realise if there is something in your life that needs to be different.

The step of writing things down and consciously realising that you would like to make a change in your life is already a step towards achieving that change. It takes a lot of repetition to create a new habit or welcome a new experience. Research has shown that it takes up to 15 to 250 days worth of repetition.

We want to change everything all at once and we should not expect this.

The latest research on new year’s resolution states that only 8% of people achieve their New Year’s resolutions. A third don’t even make it to February. The problem is that we want to revamp our diets, read more books, spend more time with family and cut the chain handcuffing us to our desks, and we want to achieve this all at the same time.

Try and focus on one habit or one situation you would like to change and place all your energy onto that and give it time. Take the risk and welcome change, you never know what exciting things wait around the corner. @Celia Ponzo

Célia is passionate to inspire happier and healthier lives by sharing holistic tips to her public. Her background is in medical anthropology and public health. She is currently working in the nutrition unit at the ministry of health.

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J’ai décidé d’être heureux !(par Et oui, depuis longtemps déjà, j’ai décidé d’être heureux et ca marche. J’entends déjà les aigris et les mauvaises langues me dire que vu l’état de la planète, c’est complètement utopique de croire au bonheur. C’est même indécent voir même insolent.

Etre heureux et en plus le dire haut et fort et pire encore, osez l’écrire !!

Oui, je suis un mec heureux et je côtoie Monsieur bonheur quotidiennement. Je vous rassure, je suis heureux, mais ni stupide et encore moins aveugle, mais au contraire complètement lucide et conscient sur l’état du monde, et je perçois comme tout le monde la morosité ambiante. Car être heureux, ce n’est pas vivre dans un monde de bisounours, mais bien au contraire avoir les deux pieds bien ancrés dans la réalité. Etre heureux se décide, c’est un choix à faire, c’est une décision importante de notre vie qui nous appartient. « Si l’on bâtissait la maison du bonheur, la plus grande pièce serait la salle d’attente » disait Jules Renard. Je ne suis pas d’accord, car il ne faut pas attendre le bonheur. Quand j’aurais mon bac, quand j’aurais une augmentation, quand les enfants seront grands, quand la maison sera finie, quand je serais a la retraite .etc.. vous risquez de l’attendre vraiment longtemps. Non, le bonheur, c’est ici et maintenant.

Le bonheur, c’est dans tous les petits gestes du quotidien, le bonheur il est la. vous êtes en train de lire Potpourri, le bonheur est la !! Ne le chercher pas ailleurs que dans vous-même. Nous avons tous en nous la pépite du bonheur, il suffit de la chercher et parfois de débroussailler un peu avant de la découvrir.

Certains me disent « oui, mais toi tu as de la chance » Je ne crois sincèrement pas que la chance est à voir avec le bonheur. Certes, je dois bien l’avouer, j’ai la chance d’avoir eu de bonnes fondations (merci maman, merci papa). Une éducation basée sur les valeurs de la vie et remplie d’amour favorise certainement l’épanouissement et la recherche du bonheur. Mais attention, car si vous demandez aux parents ce qui leur importent pour leurs enfants, presque tous vous répondrons « qu’ils soient heureux ». Mais la majorité d’entres eux les poussent à suivre des voies qui ne leur correspondent pas du tout, car ils gardent la conviction que la réussite professionnelle est la seule voie d’accès au bonheur.

Etre heureux nécessite un travail quotidien, et nous

oblige a des nouvelles habitudes de vie. Je ne vais pas ici en dresser un catalogue mais partager simplement ce qui pour moi est essentiel pour être heureux.

Tout d’abord, il faut s’aimer, se respecter, s’accepter, tel que l’on est et non pas tel que l’on voudrait être. Il faut savoir faire la paix avec soit même. Se regarder avec bienveillance, car trop souvent le regard que

“JE NE CROIS SINCÈREMENT PAS QUE LA CHANCE EST À VOIR AVEC LE BONHEUR. CERTES, JE DOIS BIEN L’AVOUER, J’AI LA CHANCE D’AVOIR EU DE BONNES FONDATIONS (MERCI MAMAN, MERCI PAPA). UNE ÉDUCATION BASÉE SUR LES VALEURS DE LA VIE ET REMPLIE D’AMOUR FAVORISE CERTAINEMENT L’ÉPANOUISSEMENT ET LA RECHERCHE DU BONHEUR.”. nous avons sur nous même nous condamne.

Arrêtons de focaliser sur nos défauts, nos manques et nos faiblesses, nous en avons tous, mais admirons plutôt nos magiques qualités et notre sublime richesse. C’est idéal pour doper la confiance en soi et pouvoir progresser vers le bonheur. Pour cela, il faut avoir le courage de faire ses deuils. Si je refuse de faire les deuils des moments pénibles de ma vie, si je refuse de pleurer ce qu’il y a a pleurer et a évacuer, de vivre mes colères, alors ces deuils vont m’habiter ma vie entière et feront un rempart a ma recherche du bonheur.

Sur le chemin du bonheur, il vous faudra cultiver avec la plus grande des vigilances votre jardin relationnel. Grincheux de toutes sortes, les jamais content, les machos, les racistes et j’en passe, ceux qui ne savent plus s’émerveiller, ceux qui ne dansent plus, ne chantent plus, ne rit plus, passez votre chemin, vous êtes les mauvaises herbes du bonheur et si le bonheur est contagieux, les mauvaises herbes le sont tout autant. Il faut prendre de nouvelles habitudes et bien choisir les gens qui nous tirent vers le haut.

A bonne entendeur salut !

Le bonheur est contagieux. Egoïsme et bonheur font rarement bon ménage. Mettez votre énergie au profit des autres, famille, amis, relations, soyez ouverts et généreux.

Regardez autour de vous, il y a toujours des gens moins biens lotis qui ont besoin de soutien. Donner, partager, échanger feront de vous un être heureux. Et bien sur, plus tu donneras, plus tu recevras et plus tu seras heureux.

Savoir choisir, faire les bons choix, savoir dire non, savoir dire oui. Nous sommes confrontés à cela tous les jours et pourtant,

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Georges Gravé)

très souvent nous n’avons pas le courage de prendre des vraies décisions, des décisions qui sont bonnes pour nous.

Combien de fois nous retrouvons nous a une soirée a laquelle nous n’avions pas envie de venir, nous n’avons pas osé dire non et nous subissons des gens que nous n’avions pas choisi de voir. Si vous m’inviter a un repas ou a une soirée, j’aurais toujours le courage de vous dire non, si je n’ai pas envie de venir et si je vous dis oui, je vous demanderais toujours qui sont les autres invités. Non, je ne suis pas un goujat, je me respecte tout simplement et je protège mon environnement personnel. Car être heureux, ne veut pas dire aimer tout le monde.

Le bonheur c’est aussi donner du sens à nos actions et à nos dires. Soyons en cohérence avec nous même. Essayons d’être en cohérence entre ce que je pense, entre ce que je dis et entre ce que je fais. C’est un travail de chaque instant mais qui pour sur, nous ouvre la porte du bonheur. Développer une « justesse » de vie. Une attention juste, être pleinement présent à ce que nous faisons et à ce que nous vivons, vivre l’instant présent.

Une pensée juste dirigée par notre conscience et non pas par l’extérieure, une pensée constructive qui voit les aspects positifs d’une situation. Et une décision juste. Je décide d’être heureux de manière permanente et je ressens pleinement le plaisir d’être vivant et je me concentre plus sur la beauté que sur les défauts des choses.

Le bonheur, c’est commencer à être maitre de son destin. C’est moi et moi seul qui chaque matin va décider de la couleur de ma journée. Les événements qui suivront sont neutres. Ils prendront vie avec les émotions que je leur accorde. En fait, qu’est-ce que le bonheur sinon l’accord vrai entre un homme et l’existence qu’il mène ?

J’ai pris beaucoup de plaisir à écrire ces quelques lignes pour vous, car avant toute chose pour commencer à être heureux, faites vous plaisir ! Alors pour le plaisir chantons ensemble à tue-tête cette ancienne et joyeuse chanson de Ray Ventura remis au gout du jour par Patrick Bruel : Qu’est ce qu’on attend pour être heureux ! « Qu’est ce qu’on attend pour être heureux, la route est prête, le ciel est bleu, y’a des chansons dans le piano a queue, il y a de l’espoir dans tous les yeux et des sourires dans chaque fossette, la joie nous guette, c’est merveilleux. Qu’est ce qu’on attend pour être heureux « Bravo !

Georges Gravé is the Personal Development & Training Manager at the Maia Luxury Resort and Spa

FEBRUARY 2015 | POTPOURRI

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KNOW YOUR RIGHTS WITH

BE RNA R D GE ORGE S all too well, the easy part is the divorce. Agreeing to divide the property acquired in the marriage is the hard part. The lawyers and the court have to deal with contesting claims of ownership, with one party alleging that the other never worked (and vice versa) and with the old canard that the receipt for the sofa or divider was put in the name of the one party but that in fact it was the other who had given him or her the money to go and purchase the item. A solution of sorts is always found, but the more the court gets involved in sharing out property the less acceptable to both parties the end result is likely to be. For that reason, recent rules try and encourage the parties to mediate a solution – to sit around a table with a judge and try and settle the issues regarding property themselves, instead of letting others do it for them. The process is still too young to pass judgment on, but it is hoped that it will promote more agreement and fewer fights.

The settlement of property is fraught with difficulties. If both parties entered into a marriage with nothing, both worked and acquired

My husband and I are separating after 5 years of marriage resulting in no children. It’s amicable enough with one exception. We both came into the marriage with a pet. Our dogs were both young when we married and have grown up together. It seems cruel to split them up now. I’ve gotten to keep the house and the garden with it while my husband has moved temporarily into a flat and wants to leave his (our) dog with his mother until he finds a house with a garden. How do I fight this?

With a great deal of difficulty, is the short answer. But this question, seemingly easy to deal with at first blush, opens up a veritable can of worms and gives me the opportunity to deal with the tricky issues of attitudes to marital breakup and the separation of matrimonial property following it.

It is refreshing to meet couples – as I had the good fortune to do recently – whose marriage has broken down and who have dealt with the fallout sensibly and as adults should, parted with no recrimination and stayed friends, indeed good friends, with each other and their respective partners afterwards. That is the way it should be, and that is the way with the couple we are considering here too. Alas, that is seldom the way it goes.

Rather, the norm is an all out fight over everything – house, furniture, motor-vehicle and wedding presents from that wonderful night all those years before – amid a massive public washing of the dirty marital linen.

In 1992 the law relating to divorce changed radically. Prior to then, the old law of divorce required one party (the ‘innocent’ party) to file a case against the other (the ‘guilty’ party). This was a prelude to war. To win, the innocent party had to heap all the blame for the failure of the marriage onto the guilty party. Sometimes this was easy enough, but often the court realised that the line between guilt for the breakdown marriage and innocence was blurred. It was obvious that many marriages break down because both parties are partly to blame, and some broke down owing to basic incompatibility – the two should never have married in the first place. To cater for that, the law adopted a more humane approach and did away with the labels of ‘guilty’ and ‘innocent’ in favour of recognition that the marriage had broken down irretrievably. For the first time, divorce by consent became available. That, society felt, was a more reasonable and adult way of dealing with the end of a ‘till death do us part’ engagement.

And so it is.

However, if divorce is more humane, the same cannot be said of dealing with matrimonial property after divorce. In fact, as divorce lawyers know

“The law is clear that matrimonial property is only that which has been acquired during the marriage. What belonged to one party before does not count. It remains for that party.” property, then the unscrambling of who should get what will be relatively easy. But there are many variables on this simple theme. Sometimes one party does not work, but looks after the home and the children, enabling the other to go out and work. Sometimes one party brings property (inherited land, or a motorcar purchased prior) to the marriage.

Sometimes one party pays for building a house on land belonging to the other party or that party’s family. In all these cases, the court will have to decide on the relative claims of both parties and try and do justice. It is a headache. Then, add to that mess the problem here: pets.

The law is clear that matrimonial property is only that which has been acquired during the marriage. What belonged to one party before does not count. It remains for that party. So, the husband’s dog is the husband’s. He can take it away and split up the friendship between the two pets if he wants. The law cannot compel him not to leave the dog with his mother temporarily. But, should he? And there lies the 60,000 dollar question. Divorce and separation bring out the very worst in people. That is a fact of life. The exception is the two couples I met recently. The norm is the couple who dig in on their positions. The fact of the matter is that the couple here are separating. Maybe they both love their individual pets equally. If the pets are kept together one party will lose out completely. If the pets are shared, each will have one. The pets will get used to the loss of each other, just as their owners will. There is really no easy way of separating and divorcing. It is a tough business. If the husband were to leave his dog with his mother for good, then that would not be reasonable and would be a simple act of vengeance. But it is a temporary arrangement until he finds a house with a garden. So, on balance, he is not acting unreasonably. In any event the wife cannot prevent him taking the dog away and, even if she could, the court would probably allow him to do so.

There is a bigger lesson here, however. And that is to talk things through.

Then talk some more until there is agreement on all issues. Talk is free, and a bad conversation in an attempt at sorting out differences upon separation – including the sharing of pets – is a whole lot better than a good meeting with your lawyer. I know. I am a lawyer.

Educated at Seychelles College and Cambridge University, Bernard Georges has two Masters Degrees – in the law of divorce and in canon law, the law of the church. He is best known as a lawyer, having been in private practice for over 30 years. Over the past ten years, he has also been a member of the National Assembly. He is currently a part-time lecturer in law at the University of Seychelles, where he teaches Constitutional Law. And, he is a budding writer. He has written and published two novels to date and he promises many more books on history, law and Seychelles.

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CENTER SPOT with Gervais Waye Hive

By Hanifa Francoise

“Gervais believes that having devoted support is one of the key things that boost a players morale, and he wishes that the St Michel supporters would take to attending all of their matches rather than the select few major ones, as nothing beats the feeling of having voices rooting for you while you’re giving your all out on the field”.

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Gervais is wearing: Shirt: SR750, Trousers: SR650, Belt: SR600 and Shoes: SR950, all from Cufflinks PTY Ltd, ESPACE building.

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The local soccer diehards, devoted St. Michel United fans and numerous Facebook friends who in turn are also devoted fans have dubbed him as the “Local Neymar”. Anyone who paid any amount of attention to last year’s World Cup is familiar with the name Neymar da Silva Santos, hence conveying such a nickname as “Local Neymar” to any football player speaks volumes of his talent. But the question at hand is, do we really know this Gervais Waye Hive character we keep hearing about constantly on National Radio and Seeing on National Television? I guess not as much as you would think, but there are a few little facts I could let you in on.

First and foremost, Gervais is more than a football player. He is a son, a father, best friend and boyfriend. As a son he is devoted to doing the utmost for his parents as they played a key role in molding him into the man he is today, supporting him to pursue his dream as a footballer from the tender of age of seven years old where his idol was one of Britain’s iconic sportsmen, David Beckham. Gervais makes it no secret how big of a Beckham fan he was, following the soccer great’s career inspired his fresh-faced mind greatly and this drove Gervais to his kick-off as a football player. At the age of nine he joined the ‘Excellence’ football team for boys under 15. A team of which he was a dedicated young footballer until its closure.

Gervais then went on to join St Louis Youth at the age of 12 and this is when he officially decided to make a career out of football. He left St Louis Youth to join Redstar and was a part of the team until he finally made the big step of moving to England to broaden his perspectives, sharpen

Gervais’ girlfriend, Keisha says, “We have our ups and downs like any other couple but most of the time it’s always smiles and happiness, reasons being he is not only the romantic type, but because I also fully support his career, I attend all of his matches when able.”

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losing the baby. His top right arm has his mother’s name and two hands praying. Reasons behind it being that at some point in his life where he was really struggling, and his mother was there for him and helped him out. On the inside of his right arm again, he has a quote about life related to another phase of his life. In view of his recent role as a father, Gervais has the adorable Keylam Waye-Hive’s full name and birth details on his lower right arm, accompanied by his whole family in chinese characters.

You would think that would be the end of it, but no, the canvas goes on to portray “my son, my world, my everything” in Hindu on his right rib side and on the left rib side, being the romantic that he is, Gervais has the date that he met his girlfriend Keshia in roman numerals. The current final tattoo on his body happens to be no other than his father’s name on his leg. So you see, his mindset revolves around his loved one’s as they are the main reason he continues intensely up the hill that leads him to his growing career.

Like any other person Gervais has his favorites other than football, such as playing Fifa15 on his PlayStation console; no surprise there! His feelings while playing the game and playing in real life aren’t that different. He loves to win, but hates to lose. On the rare occasions that he does lose, he happens to be a very moody Gervais. He also enjoys being at the beach with his lady and friends, spending time with his son and as much time with his family. This can be strenuous as he has to separate his time seven days a week between football, helping with the family business and spending time with his loved ones. As little as it may be, Gervais enjoys and looks forward to his alone time. He mostly spends his ‘Me Time’ riding his motor bike.

Does he dislike anything? Find anything distasteful? Of course he does, not that much, but just the simple things like what is termed as ‘Fake people’ and ‘Fake friends’, people who take up residence in his life for their own gain and benefit without a care in the world about his life. Having encountered such situations many times, has given him trust issues. In his own words: “This is how I see today’s society, everyone wants to be better, Or better off than the person next to them. They want fame, money and big cars, and failure to obtain these things causes them to go on a rampage of destroying what their comrades have out of jealousy”. Other than that, he happens to have a fear of planes, which tends to conflict with his love for travelling.

When asked what he would be other than a footballer, Gervais replies

“Gervais makes it no secret how big of a Beckham fan he was, following the soccer great’s career inspired his fresh-faced mind greatly and this drove Gervais to his kick-off as a football player”. with “I really don’t know what I would have been”. One would think that this shows his lack of a backup plan in case the whole football thing doesn’t work out, but that’s where you would be wrong. Gervais has plans to become a football coach when he retires from football which he’s not planning to happen anytime soon. He already holds a level C coaching status which enabled him to coach the Mont Fleuri under-15 boy’s team until his build up to being the current Assistant coach to the St Michel Youth team.

It is no secret by now that Gervais is a young man with a big heart, with hopes and dreams just like anyone else, one of them being that his son follows in his footsteps, in the event that it doesn’t happen, it won’t break his heart, as long as his son pursues his own dreams with the determination he has.

So there you have it people, Gervais Waye-Hive’s tell all. For those skeptical about whether or not he deserved the player of the year award you have only to keep an eye out for him this year, key matches to look out for are: •

Jeux des Iles 2015

•

St Michel Vs Mamelodi Sundowns - 14th February Home match

•

St Michel Vs Mamelodi Sundowns – 28th February Away match

•

Presidents Cup 2015

•

COSAFA 2015 – South Africa As every other role model, Gervais’ parting words were dedicated to

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his skills and make his path as a footballer. At the invigorating age of 19 he was part of the Merstham reserve team. Being part of a reserve team didn’t phase Gervais, as he knew nothing good came easy. After completing two seasons with Merstham, he transferred to Banstead FC. But shortly after joining Banstead FC, Gervais returned home to Seychelles in 2010 and joined St Michel United and later on in 2011 he was part of the National Team that won the Gold during the ‘Jeux des Isles’ his home based successes fueled him with more passion, with which he returned to the UK and joined Moseley FC. One would question Gervais’s decision to return to Seychelles early July 2012, his reasons were simple, he missed his home, he missed his friends, and mostly he missed his family, so he packed up, and headed home for a sabbatical and back to St Michel United as an active team member during his stay. During a match with Cote D’or in September 2013, he suffered a broken leg and he had to exit the 2013 season. Being the football enthusiast that he is, being unable to be on the field was quite frustrating for him, but he used the time to set goals for himself. Proof of this is the ‘Best Player Award’ he received for the year 2014, which was something he was working towards, not only driven by wanting to make up lost time while he was off field, but also because by then he now had a son of his own who he wanted to someday tell of his path during his career as a footballer and as a means of teaching him what one can achieve with the proper mindset.

It is to be noted that although he loved being home and loved playing for St Michel, Gervais preferred playing in UK for Moseley FC, not because he isn’t patriotic, but because he needed a much more advanced plane if he was to fulfill his dreams. Playing semi-pro football in the UK, he experienced a faster paced and mentally challenging nature of football, which is why he had made the decision to pack to leave for the UK but had to reconsider when he learnt he was going to be a father. Having grown up in a ‘family first’ atmosphere, it was no surprise when he changed his plans and decided to stay and be a part of his son’s life.

The highlights and proudest moments in his career as a footballer are the 2013 match against Cote D’or where he scored 3 goals and enabled his team to take a 4-1 win and a Seychelles v/s Sri Lanka match where he scored 2 out of 3 goals, crediting his team with a 3-1 win. There were his proudest moments not only because he scored the goals enabling a win, but because his number one fan, his father, attends all of his matches and was able to see him in his moment of triumph as it happened. Gervais believes that having devoted support is one of the key things that boost a players morale, and he wishes that the St Michel supporters would take to attending all of their matches rather than the select few major ones, as nothing beats the feeling of having voices rooting for you while you’re giving your all out on the field.

One would think that with his heart set so hard to being a professional footballer, the ambitious Mr. Waye Hive has no time on his hands for anything else on the contrary; football is a passion that he has molded to work in unison with other aspects of his life. When off the field, Gervais is either spending time with his friends, mostly his best friend Karl Hall who is also an aspiring footballer. When asked about Gervais, this is what Karl has to say “Gervais is very laid back, humble and easy to get along with and very funny. He’s the type of person to do a favor for anyone as he’s not the type to say no. He works hard to improve his game and he is extremely motivated, determined and focused towards winning the Player of the year award again this year”.

Another aspect of Gervais’s life that he hasn’t allowed his career to deprive him of is a love life, yes ladies; he is no longer one of Seychelles’ eligible bachelors as the lovely Keshia Dang Fang stole his heart. In Keshia’s own words, this is what she has to say about Gervais and her relationship with the footballer, “Being Gervais’s girlfriend is great! We have our ups and downs like any other couple but most of the time it’s always smiles and happiness, reasons being he is not only the romantic type, but because I also fully support his career, I attend all of his matches when able.

I’m really proud of him as he puts quite a lot of effort in his football. At his happiest moments he talks a lot, a common example would be when his team wins a game, he just goes on and on and on about the goal or goals he scored during the match. If it were a major competition, he talks about how glad he is that they won and this is followed up by going out to celebrate. When it comes to groupies I don’t really bother myself about them for the simple reason that I know it’s what happens when your boyfriend has such a career.

Yes at times you may see girls around him, talking to him or even messaging him saying how he played well and so on. The matter doesn’t phase me because I have complete trust in Gervais and the man he is.”

Having two key participants of Gervais’s life speak so highly of him says volumes. Another show of proof to Gervais’s dedication to his family is the tattooed work of art that takes up over half of his body. All in all, Gervais has numerous tattoos, his body is a canvas with works dedicated to his family, such as the sleeve on his right arm which happens to be about the baby sister he never had, due to the unfortunate incident of his mother

SPORTS PERSONALITY

aspiring footballers of Seychelles “It may be hard to make a career out of football in Seychelles, but one can always start, with the right team, where teammates maintain a good relationship and are competitive amongst each other to provide not only support but a needed push. With the right support from primarily family and friends as well as other loved ones and by rebuffing from drugs and alcohol abuse , your dreams can and will come true. All you have to do is stay true to your path.”

No lucky charms and no enhancements, just a positive

mindset, a supportive surrounding and the will to follow his heart. That’s what makes Gervais who he is, whether he’s playing the as the right midfield, left midfield or striker. His mindset remains the same, set to one specific goal. Making a win.

Gervais and son, Keylam. One of his many tattoos goes on to portray “my son, my world, my everything” in Hindu.

The St Michel United Football Club Family.

Follow and support them on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pages/St-Michel-United-Football-Club

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VIEW FROM THE STATION

THE USE OF BIOGEOMETRY

To see the invisible and do the impossible

By Jenny Gilbert I have yet to meet anyone who is not fascinated by, or in awe of the ancient Egyptians. From as early as I can remember, I have been intrigued by this ancient civilization, hungry for more tangible evidence to support my own sense that I’m connected to the Egyptians, which I was never able to explain. Suffice to say, birthday presents were often books on the subject and I have had my fair share of Egyptian friends and colleagues, not to mention quite a number of interesting visits at The Station by Egyptians or others who have founded careers and businesses based on ancient Egyptian knowledge.

My interest in the ancient Egyptians comes from trying to learn about how they, like other ancient civilizations, lived in harmony with the laws

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of nature and how they used ancient wisdom to bring harmony to their physical reality - what they believed to be a whole energy system. Using tools to tap into universal intelligence, the ancient Egyptians prospered as a civilization, achieving incredible feats that we have yet to fully comprehend.

I suppose it was not surprising that I would eventually be introduced to an Egyptian who could answer some of my questions in a way that sits well with what I feel is true. One of my all-time heroes, this man would lead me to a deeper appreciation of what this ancient civilization could offer in respect of healing – of the individual and the planet – and my journey has only just begun.

This incredibly humble, charismatic and brilliant individual deserves the spotlight and I intend to use this space in order to give him the recognition he deserves, as well as to point you in his direction.

A true Aquarian, Dr Ibrahim Karim was born in Egypt on 1st February 1942. An architect and a scientist and the founder of BioGeometry, Dr Karim discovered early in the 1970’s that shapes, colours, motion and sounds induce harmony into the subtle energetic qualities of the environment.

I can only advise each of you to look him up, to read about the amazing ‘miracles’ being performed through the use of his system of BioGeometry. You will find a wealth of helpful information on how to start the process of being a more qualitative individual as opposed to being quantitive, which Karim believes is the cure to everything that ails us and our world.

Dr Karim reminds us that we are not completely isolated from our environment. Whether natural or man-made, our environment has a direct effect on our well being. We must consider too that the way we relate to friends, family and colleagues plays an important role in the state of our health, often times in a negative way. He provides solutions based on ancient wisdom to reverse these negative influences by redirecting or neutralizing them in order to bring harmonious flow. Using shapes, symbolism, colour and light, it is within our power to start healing ourselves and our environment.

In Dr Karim’s words: “If we look at each organ’s energy function with the understanding that a particular power of nature is working within it, we can say that some Universal Law of nature is at work (call it what you like: energy quality, Divine Name, attribute, NTR, angel or just energy pattern). In this way, we can detect the correspondences between the organ’s energy function and any of the above systems. Let’s say you have a problem with a particular organ, if you become aware through right-brain perception that these powers are working inside of you, you can connect to them through a specific prayer, through rhythm, number, sound, colour or maybe use the sustainable physical manifestation of the language of nature in the form of BioGeometry shapes, that can bring balance to your system and hopefully support the medical treatments. Subtle energy balance is a vital factor in the success of any kind of orthodox or complementary medical treatment.”

What I find so refreshing about Dr Karim’s work is that he demystifies and legitimises concepts about the Divine through research work that is undeniable. From making villages in Hemberg, Switzerland safe from disease-forming electromagnetic radiation to curing and protecting from Hepatitis C in medical tests in Egypt, Dr Karim’s commitment to sharing a lifetime’s work in the field of energy healing will help us to become more whole individuals.

Our project, which leans very heavily on the understanding that invisible realms play a major role in influencing our interaction with our surroundings to support vibrant well being, is still very much in process.

We will most certainly reach out to this wonderful human being when we know that we are absolutely ready for

“DR KARIM REMINDS US THAT WE ARE NOT COMPLETELY ISOLATED FROM OUR ENVIRONMENT. WHETHER NATURAL OR MAN-MADE, OUR ENVIRONMENT HAS A DIRECT EFFECT ON OUR WELL BEING….

USING SHAPES, SYMBOLISM, COLOUR AND LIGHT, IT IS WITHIN OUR POWER TO START HEALING OURSELVES AND OUR ENVIRONMENT”. him and in the meantime we are learning more and more about the man and his gift to humanity.

“BioGeometry and the development of its techniques will take us into the future by unlocking the secrets of the past”.

Whether you are building a new house, buying a plot of land, trying to find ways to minimize radiation from overhead electrical cables or simply want to learn about how to bring harmony to your environment or improve your health, I would suggest that you urgently explore the wonderful world of BioGeometry and BioSignatures. Dr Karim has been able to interpret and utilize ancient wisdom to effect change in today’s modern world. As Dr Karim suggests, “You need to be able to see the invisible in order to do the impossible”. Let him show you the way.

In box with J Gilbert put http://www. thestationseychelles.com/reflections.

Jenny Gilbert is the founder and owner of Everglow Ltd, the island’s premier natural health manufactures and service providers. She is also Director of Wellness at Resonate Wellness at The Station. Homoeopathy is a well recognised system of ‘natural’ medical treatments for most diseases and conditions. Please visit http://www.thestationseychelles.com/reflections or email wellbeing@thestationseychelles.com

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A few years ago I literally went out on a limb, contacting him directly to establish whether he would be willing to consider working with us on a project. My gut told me that he would be kind and responsive despite the fact that he is clearly a very busy man with a massive mission, not to mention incredible fame amongst enlightened energy luminaries. I was simply overwhelmed by his genuine consideration of our request and even more astonished that he was so willing to find the time to work with us - mere mortals trying to make a difference from these tiny islands.

AGONY AUNT

Dear Annalisa ......

Knight in Shining Armour Q:

Dear Annalisa, In 2014, I dated seven guys - a significant reduction from my 2013 number. It breaks my heart to think I still have not found my one perfect person. All of the relationships die in infancy – I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. All I want is to be happy with someone who loves me. Where is he?

Gerda, 24

A:

Dear Gerda, Believe me, you are not the only sista with that question. For one sista, he just got here. For another, he will be coming but on a much slower train. I also know a sista who is done waiting and is looking no more. Then there is the sista who believes she had found him but somehow also lost him.

Sometimes he gets off that train, stands in front of us, yet somehow we don’t quite see him cause either we’re still looking at the one walking away or still waiting for that “perfect person”.

So where is he? He could be anywhere I guess. Maybe he’s in the same place you’ve always been looking or maybe he’s somewhere (e.g.

Balbobes – sorry, private joke). Maybe a change of perspective is what you need for the new search in 2015. Some would even argue that you should stop looking/searching, he will find you at the right time.

Divided on the matter, let’s turn to science. According to scientific research, the factors attributed to romance point to proximity, similarity and attraction. We tend to fall in love with people who are located close to us, have things in common with us and that we are attracted to. These three factors play a central part in both friendship and love. We can only get to like and to love people with whom we have contact. Now this is not much of an issue in Seychelles as we’re all a bus (at the most a boat) ride away. Secondly, contrary to popular belief that opposites attract, it would seem that when it comes to romantic relationships, similar attracts.

Plainly put, we are attracted to people who like much of the things we do, share similar beliefs and have similar values. Lastly, we tend to end up in relationships with people that we find physically attractive.

So how have you been going about this dating business? Have you ever considered any of those factors? Now, one of the key issues is that sometimes we’re not even sure what we like. You may find yourself following whatever activity someone else likes.

This time of singlehood is a good time to practice the exercise of getting to know oneself. What are your plans for personal development, career wise, relationship wise – what you want from the “perfect person”? Are you being realistic? Does ‘perfection’ really exist? As humans are we all not laced with one flaw or another? If so, what flaws can you tolerate and live with? Don’t forget to look inward; how do you make yourself better, for yourself (e.g. healthier). Are there any behaviours you might not like in others that you see in yourself? How do you change that? Remember: You only have control over yourself, and not others.

Take this time to discover your abilities, talents and skills. Take up new activities, not forgetting that this creates opportunities to meet new people.

About that cleavage Q:

Dear Annalisa, Is it right to ask a friend if she has had a breast enlargement job? I have a friend in my circle of friends who I am somewhat close to. We somehow always sit next to each other while we’re in the group and we talk really well.

We started going to the gym together 3 months ago which is the first time the two of us ever did something on our own. She went on holiday recently and when she came back – well, let’s just say that the boys at the gym are having happier days these days. She has said nothing about it. Is it not my place?

Tracy, 28

A:

Dear Tracy, What would be the benefit of the question that warrants you a place to ask?

To ease your own curiosity?

To get the address of the surgeon for a similar pair?

To clarify for others, curious to know?

How would such a question affect the development of your friendship?

Is she someone very private, or very open about herself?

Ultimately, if you were in her place, what would you like others to do?

Friendships are predominantly based on feelings, and grounded in reciprocity and choice. They often involve emotional aspects, being based around companionship, but their depth varies a great deal from person to person. In some friendships such information is shared as part of the daily chat. In earlier days, friends know that one is displeased with small breasts and at the point of interest in getting larger breasts, so research for the best surgeons, discussions about preferable sizes and debates about the before and after of surgery are carried out together. However, in some other friendships all information pertaining to body parts is considered too private to share.

From a developmental perspective adult friendships can be viewed as having identifiable stages: Acquaintanceship, Buildup, Continuation, Deterioration and Ending (ABCDE). Based on this perspective you are past the acquaintanceship stage, and probably in between the buildup and continuation stage. What impact would that exchange have on the development of the friendship? It is hard to tell. It would depend on several other dimensions of the friendship.

•

•

•

Affective or emotional basis of the friendship, refers to self disclosure and expression of intimacy, appreciation, affection and support, all of which are based on trust, loyalty and commitment.

Shared and communal nature of the friendship, in which friends participate in or support activities of mutual interest.

Sociability and compatibility, where friends keep us entertained and are sources of amusement, fun and recreation.

It would seem that your friendship is still fairly young. As with anything young, it needs nurturing in a safe and comfortable environment so that it may blossom to its full potential. Depending on where the friendship goes, this information may just flow from either side.

Being ok with yourself and knowing yourself better might eliminate some unnecessary disappointments along the way. Ultimately, you have time.

Take your time. Go slow, enjoy the single life, and try not to make your time entirely about the search for the “perfect person”.

Annalisa Labiche is a practicing Clinical Psychologist with over 5 years experience. She completed her Bachelor of Art (Psychology) degree and Master in Psychology in Australia. She is exposed to a multitude of complaints such as relationship, parenting, family issues, psychological disorders, substance misuse amongst many others.

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HEALTH

Le 14 Février, Journée mondiale de sensibilisation aux cardiopathies congénitales.

Tout le monde connait le 14 Février comme la Saint-Valentin, qui est la fête des amoureux. L’histoire commence en 1999, lorsque la mère d’un enfant atteint d’une malformation cardiaque a l’idée que ce jour sera également celui de sensibilisation du grand public aux cardiopathies congénitales. Grace à l’aide de l’association Congenital Heart Information Network, de nombreux pays dont l’Australie, le Canada, l’Allemagne, les Emirats Arabes ou l’Angleterre acceptent cette proclamation.

Le nom officiel de cette journée est donc « Congenital Heart Defect Awareness Day ».

Qu’est ce qu’une cardiopathie congénitale ?

C’est une maladie du cœur qui est présente dès la naissance. C’est-àdire qu’il y a eu une anomalie lors de la formation du cœur in utero.

Ces cardiopathies touchent environ 1% des naissances vivantes et représentent les malformations congénitales les plus fréquentes.

“Si on soupçonne une malformation cardiaque, l’enfant sera référé à un cardiologue pédiatrique qui examinera les antécédents familiaux et médicaux, procédera à un examen médical et demandera des tests, qui peuvent comprendre : une échographie, une radiographie thoracique, un électrocardiogramme, une irm...”

Quelle en est la cause ?

Dans la majorité des cas nous ne connaissons pas la cause de ces malformations. Certaines affections ou certains troubles d’origine génétique (héréditaires), comme la trisomie 21 (syndrome de Down), sont associés à des cardiopathies congénitales. Certaines substances (l’alcool) ou maladies auxquelles sont exposées les femmes enceintes risquent d’entraîner une cardiopathie congénitale chez le fœtus — certains médicaments, la rubéole et un diabète non maîtrisé, par exemple.

Qu’en peut on faire le diagnostique ?

L’échocardiographie fœtale permet en principe de diagnostiquer environ 2/ 3 des cardiopathies congénitales (en particulier les cardiopathies congénitales graves). La réalité est toute autre puisque seule une minorité des cas est diagnostiquée avant la naissance.

Dans ce cas la cardiopathie est décelée pendant l’enfance, lors de la

découverte d’une malformation compliquée qui est alors traitée ; ou à l’âge adulte : l’anomalie est asymptomatique au départ, mais associée à l’apparition de symptômes plus tard dans la vie.

Quels sont les symptômes ?

Chez le nouveau-né : Les symptômes classiques sont : la détresse respiratoire ou une respiration accélérée ; la difficulté à respirer ou l’essoufflement lors des repas ; une mauvaise prise de poids ; une teinte bleutée de la peau, des lèvres et des ongles ainsi qu’un souffle cardiaque, parfois doux et souvent peu spécifique. Le souffle cardiaque, peut par ailleurs être le seul signe clinique de cardiopathie congénitale.

Chez l’enfant : Les enfants plus âgés présentant une malformation cardiaque sont en général asymptomatiques et ont des performances physiques normales. Il s’agit en général de cardiopathies congénitales bénignes qui ne mettent pas la vie de l’enfant en danger. Souvent les investigations débutent suite à la découverte d’un souffle cardiaque.

Attention dans la majorité des cas ces souffles sont bénins et une auscultation soignée permettra de faire le diagnostic (associée à un examen clinique général complet).

Chez l’adulte : Les symptômes couramment retrouvés chez l’adulte sont : un essoufflement, en particulier à l’effort ; une fatigue importante; une cyanose (lèvres, peau ou bout des doigts bleuâtres en raison d’un manque d’oxygène) ; un souffle cardiaque ; une anomalie du rythme cardiaque (arythmie) ; une enflure au niveau des extrémités.

Tous ces symptômes ne sont pas spécifiques et peuvent être présents lors d’autres pathologies.

Comment fait-on le diagnostic ?

Une cardiopathie congénitale peut être découverte en cours de grossesse, après la naissance ou à l’âge adulte, lorsque l’organisme sollicite davantage le cœur. Si on soupçonne une malformation cardiaque, l’enfant sera référé à un cardiologue pédiatrique qui examinera les antécédents familiaux et médicaux, procédera à un examen médical et demandera des tests, qui peuvent comprendre : une échographie, une radiographie thoracique, un électrocardiogramme, une IRM …

Quels sont les traitements et la prise en charge?

Les traitements sont multiples et dépendent du type de la cardiopathie, de la gravité et du patient. Si la cardiopathie est mineure, elle peut ne nécessiter aucun traitement. Dans les autres cas, des traitements médicamenteux peuvent sont nécessaires ou une intervention chirurgicale. Dans le cas de cardiopathies un suivi médical régulier et spécialisé est primordial.

Photo credit : http://www.chdinfo.com

FEBRUARY 2015 | POTPOURRI

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PARENTING

Teaching Your Children

To Love Themselves

By Nathalie Hodgson Do you remember the moment when you realised that you were fully comfortable in your own skin? What you look like, how you sound, how you walk, how you do anything? For some, confidence and self-esteem are a non-issue but for many, particularly through school years, there are varying degrees of self-acceptance to go through.

As parents, we want to encourage our children to love all parts of themselves. We want them to know that we love them for every aspect of their being and that we honour and respect where they are on their unique journey through life. So how can our children understand that they are imperfect just as they come? How can we teach our children to embrace all sides of themselves, if we can’t even do that for our own selves yet? Learning to love ourselves, wholly, unconditionally, learning to be authentic - even if it’s messy - is one of the greatest lessons we can teach them and who knows, we may just better ourselves in doing so.

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I remember the moment, it was when I was around 25 years old. I was totally comfortable in my own skin, I loved myself just and no one could tell me otherwise. I felt confident, free, powerful and fantastic physically and emotionally, and then I met the man of my dreams. Funny, that. So how can I help my children arrive at the same conclusion earlier than I did, or not have to go through such a long journey of self-criticism even if they are from a house where they always felt love, compassion and security?

Knowing from an early age that who you are is enough, and working with your natural tools and traits rather than against them is the real key to facing what life throws at you. normal is that they continue to compare themselves to these images and icons as they get older, always striving to be someone else; that perfect social figure. They will then soon forget to see the true beauty in themselves; their passions, their goals, their individuality.

I think back to when I was 16 and wonder how great it would have been if I had someone sit me down and point out that it is alright to be different - that in fact, self-love is the key to success. No one wants a clone. How great it would have been to have been guided through how to identify my physical and emotional highlights and flaws, how to accept and love them, no matter how obscure. Or even just to warn me that without my individuality, I’d be just another young student in the pile of graduating teenagers wanting jobs.

Who knows, maybe I would not have listened or just laughed, but I know now that I will definitely be giving my children all the opportunities I can to identify their personal traits as unique, powerful, beautiful and marketable so that they learn to love them, and in turn, to love themselves fully. With this as their foundation as they stride out into the world they will not only have emotional intelligence but be able to love anything and anyone with 100% passion.

Yes, it is a series of simple self-esteem exercises, but life throws so many curve balls that just recognising that your self-esteem is low in the hard times may not be enough. Knowing from an early age that who you are is enough, and working with your natural tools and traits rather than against them is the real key to facing what life throws at you.

So this is what I wished someone had told me back then and maybe how we can assist our children to love themselves from a young age: Single out characteristics that are striking in your child. Curly hair, big ears, stubby feet. Remind them how lovely, unique, beautiful and different they are. Explain how different the bear is to the fish or any other creature as a metaphor on the differences in physical traits that can be so different yet wonderful at the same time.

Ensure that your children see the beauty in other children’s striking characteristics. Hair colour is always a nice one to start with, so they appreciate them all. It’s important for you to help your children discover their own unique qualities, and to value others’. But also teach them that feeling special doesn’t mean feeling better than others.

Offer appropriate praises. Constant complimenting can actually erode self-esteem and inaccurate praise confuses children. Let them learn to trust their own instincts in each task and always be truthful in your compliments.

Identify your child’s passions early. Then assist them pursue it. I remember at the young age of only five, I was given the opportunity to move into the older children’s dance class, at an exclusive ballroom dance college.

This meant I had to have a boy partner (and no longer would dance with my beloved teacher). I was put with a boy of nine years old (who was not impressed that he had such a young partner). I did one lesson and went home and cried all afternoon. I did not want to dance with him, he was nasty. So after years and many, many medals, I gave up dancing, a talent that came as natural as breathing to me. What would have happened if an alternative solution had been offered to me back then and what might I be doing today?

Always encourage children to take on tasks they show interest in, then make sure they follow through to completion. It doesn’t matter what the task — it could be anything from swimming laps to building a Lego robot.

The point is for them to stick with what they start, so they feel that hit of accomplishment at the end.

When kids make their own age-appropriate choices, they feel more powerful. For example, let your child decide what coat or hat to wear. This teaches children to have control over their bodies and take responsibility for their own choices.

Don’t judge your children’s creative choices. If your child decides to create handmade gnomes covering his entire room and life with these make believe characters, let him have some fun. Who knows, this may be a phase or it may transform into a multi-million dollar business for them.

A vital lesson to pass on is that you don’t have to be liked by everyone. My favourite quote is from my grandfather: “It takes a lot of different people to make up this world, some you like and some you don’t like so much.

Never ‘hate ‘anyone or anything, just appreciate them for what they can bring to the situation and just observe”. Everyone has a right to an opinion and it may not be the same as yours. Teach them to be true to themselves always and have their own opinion. This is what makes the world such a colourful place! If there are bullies at school or they simply don’t feel popular, give them an environment outside school they feel better in, maybe an extra-curricular activity of their choice with different peers.

Make sure your child’s goals are within reach, at a level appropriate to their ability. That may mean suggesting a project that may not be at the same level as his friends, where he can feel like a star rather than being the last one picked for the A team. Assisting them to recognise his level and ability will eventually assist them to practise, work hard and be able to reach their goals with perseverance.

Always remember that 2 great catalysts driving the qualities we want to see in our children are the qualities and practices we cultivate within ourselves. Live with love, peace, kindness and compassion in your heart and this will be your greatest gift to them.

Happy Parenting.

Nathalie Hodgson, is a writer, mother, PR & Marketing consultant, Doterra aromatherapy consultant and yoga instructor, juggling this whilst raising two kids and enjoying the most of life.

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PARENTING

I bring my daughter to what she calls ‘big school’ each day and as we wait for the doors to open, she plays on the monkey bars with her friends and I cannot help but over hear some of the conversations from the older primary school girls. ‘I wish I had hair like her’, ‘I hate my hands, they look so fat’. We all know that it is normal for girls to compete, to want to look beautiful as they go through the stages of puberty and want to be the cover girls of their favourite fashion magazine. However, what is not

FASHION 41

FEBRUARY 2015 | POTPOURRI

Le Sari, entre tradition et modernité

L’année dernière, le Musée Blue Penny à l’Ile Maurice a consacré une exposition au sari, vêtement traditionnel porté par des millions de femmes en Inde, au Sri Lanka, au Népal et au Bangladesh, mais faisant également partie du vivre ensemble et du patrimoine culturel des communautés d’origine indienne dans les îles de l’Océan Indien, à Maurice, aux Seychelles et à la Réunion.

Seul vêtement sans aucun bouton, aucune fermeture, aucune épingle, tenant par lui-même sur le corps féminin, le sari trouve son origine dans la civlisation florissante de la Vallée de l’Hindus, qui existait entre 2800 et 1800 avant Jésus-Christ. Selon certains chercheurs, le sari serait encore plus ancien puisqu’il est représenté sur des sculptures datant de 5000 ans. Le sari est donc une des rares habitudes vestimentaires à avoir été conservée par le temps : il a en effet traversé les siècles sans fondamentalement changer de forme ou d’usage, alors que la plupart des vêtements se sont littéralement “Dans la littérature transformés pour mythologique indienne, et s’adapter aux nouveaux modes de vie dans notamment dans l’épopée la plupart des pays, du Mahabharata, le sari marquant aussi souvent la domination d’une est présenté comme le culture sur une autre. symbole de la pureté qu’il

La technique de drapé du sari varie selon est impossible d’enlever, les régions d’Inde, les à travers la figure de la castes, les religions, les professions. Le sari Princesse Draupadi, qui, est un langage et un réduite en esclavage, repère hiérarchique, il répond à un code de refuse de se dévêtir face à couleur précis : un sari ses ennemis et implore le blanc indiquera le signe du deuil, un sari de dieu Dharma de la revêtir couleur verte désignera de plusieurs couches de à la fois la caste des marchands («vaishya»), vêtements, lesquelles à apparaissent les unes sur les l’appartenance la communauté musulmane ou sera la autres, comme par magie”. couleur du mariage dans certaines régions d’Inde. Le port du sari bleu est généralement celui des castes de basse extraction, comme les «shûdra», caste des agriculteurs et des artisans. Le sari rouge est traditionnellement celui du mariage, mais il est également le signe de l’appartenance à la caste des nobles et des guerriers («kshatriya»). Le sari jaune ou safran est symbole d’ascétisme ou de pratique religieuse. Le sari noir sera plutôt rarement porté, car considéré comme de mauvaise augure. Le port du premier sari marque pour une jeune fille son entrée dans la puberté.

Dans la littérature mythologique indienne, et notamment dans l’épopée du Mahabharata, le sari est présenté comme le symbole de la pureté qu’il est impossible d’enlever, à travers la figure de la Princesse Draupadi, qui, réduite en esclavage, refuse de se dévêtir face à ses ennemis et implore le dieu Dharma de la revêtir de plusieurs couches de vêtements, lesquelles apparaissent les unes sur les autres, comme par magie. Le sari est donc symbole de la vertu féminine préservée.

Au cours de l’histoire, le sari a pu s’exprimer comme une arme politique : lors de la période coloniale anglaise, la résistance en Inde

s’est articulée autour du mouvement Swadeshi, le parti indépendantiste indien, qui s’est élévé contre les taxes appliquées aux produits locaux et à l’artisanat textile. Gandhi a défendu l’indépencance de l’Inde en faisant du tissage à domicile une revendication politique. Le sari et le métier à tisser sont devenus à ce moment-là les emblèmes de l’Inde indépendante.

Indira Gandhi, première ministre de l’Inde jusqu’à son assassinat en 1984, et toujours vêtue d’un sari, a durablement marqué les esprits en imposant la présence de cette nation sur la scène internationale parmi les pays non alignés.

De nos jours, les actrices bollywoodiennes influencent considérablement les modes et pratiques dans le domaine du sari, imposant leurs motifs modernes à celles qui peuvent se le permettre, car le sari, qui représente le quart de la production textile de l’Inde, peut atteindre des sommes élevées.

Le sari, alliance à la fois du chic et de la simplicité, de la tradition et de la modernité, joue ainsi un grand rôle dans l’économie, la culture et l’identité indienne.

Marie Welsch

Evènements culturels culturels

Cours de français

Ateliers créatifs

AllianceFrançaise de Victoria Toutes les informations sur les évènements culturels à l’Alliance sur notre site internet www.allianceseychelles.org

FEBRUARY 2015 | POTPOURRI

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Weight Loss with Kirschlee

to go, but on the harder-than-usual kinds of days, I remind myself how far I’ve come so far. My goal is to reach my ideal Body Mass Index, which is the weight I should be according to my height.

Hello to changes

They say that experience changes you. I for one am no exception to that. Like they say ‘What you see, is what you get’. A lot has changed since my journey began. For one, I actually eat breakfast now, and I cannot stress how important of a part of my day it has become. I ’m more responsible with both my expenses and my time.

The new lifestyle however has not changed me as a person as such. I’m still the same Lana with. Still the same outlook and love for life, if not an even greater one now. I have learnt that a change in lifestyle does not necessarily need to dictate how I live life.

Thank You

Lana Fock-Tave (29) My name is Lana, a fun-loving, high-spirited, loud young lady; soon to be 29yrs 29 on 8th February 2015. This is my weight loss success story.

Throughout my life, I have struggled with my weight which fluctuated from one figure on the scale to another. I would lose some weight but would equally gain it all back. It was basically a very frustrating, and needless to say discouraging see-saw process.

People often ask me what made me decide to lose weight.

I can’t really say there was ever a breaking point per se. I suppose that I had reached the point where I had started to feel discouraged at the fact that I had tried all the weight-loss methods, and my list had slowly been exhausted over the years. I was out of ideas and almost out of hope. Like I said, I would usually lose some weight, but I had never reached my goals. I met Kirschlee at a time when I felt like my hard work was not paying off as much as it should have been. On one hand, yes, I was discouraged. On the other however, I was more determined than ever to take control and get things done. I knew that in order to get results, I would have to start doing some things differently, even if it meant yet another change in my lifestyle and daily habits. My biggest motivating factor was my health; aA healthier me would mean a less stressed me!

For some special people present throughout my journey, I am most particularly grateful. With that said, I thank the almighty God; for giving me courage and strength everyday. Special thanks to Kirschlee &and his lovely daughter May-Lingh for everything they have done for me this far. I am and will always be grateful to them for their commitment, advice, assistance, motivation and continuous encouragement. An extra

So the story began!

I was told of Kirschlee by a family friend, and so I decided to pay him a visit. I’ll be honest - I was quite apprehensive of his methods at first. I had to have six meals a day!! And I was there looking at him, wondering how he expected me to lose weight by eating more! It wouldn’t make sense to most people right? At that point though, being open to trying something new (and different to say the least) I decided that if I couldn’t change my mindset, I couldn’t change anything at all.

Not the smoothest of rides.

Nothing worth having comes easy-this journey not only been a great challenge, but also an incredible experience. I’ve learnt to persevere even when things seemed to stop at a standstill.

I’ve learnt that the time for action is now, and that it’s never too late to do something.

This journey has not been a path without its bumps. Weight loss is not a physical challenge but a mental one. You need to have a whole lot of determination and willpower, without which you will never reach your goals. I found myself constantly surprising myself-so many things that I thought would be impossible: Firstly; eating six times in a day, secondly exercising every morning & evening (7 days a week) and lastly mygreatest challenge ‘no salt’! Honestly, there were times when I would feel that results from my efforts were minimal and slow- a reasonable and legitimate reason for anyone to feel discouraged and want to give up. However, I would tell myself that consistency was key and to take it one pound at a time. I remained dedicated to the plan and it eventually became a habit; after a few weeks it was no longer a just a diet, but rather a lifestyle.

Progress comes with change-and changes there have been! I started out at a size 22 in May 2014, and by December, I had dropped down to a size 16 (lost 18kg). I still have a long way

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AFTER special note of thanks goes to those who have been and who are still there for me in so many ways; my mum Lisette, my beloved aunty Chilla, my partner Darel, my bro Aubrey, and of course my girlfriends Sandra, Nicole, Nadine, Samantha, Barbara &and Avrina.. Last but not least, thank you to my littlel baby brother Gareth who is always there to cheer me up and make my day.

Last Note

If I were to sum up what I’ve learnt so far, it’s this: You are who you want to be. So if you’re not happy about who you are, you and only you have the power to change that. You have to want something for yourself in order for you to get it done. Others wanting it for you will never be enough. At the end of the day, the power to change is within you, and if I can do it, so can anybody else, just believe in yourself!

I hope that my story will inspire you to take the 1ststep first step towards a healthier lifestyle.

By Martine Gontier

SACOS INSURANCE – PROTECTING YOUR HOME AND YOUR BUSINESS Having insurance with SACOS can certainly save the day.

By insuring your house with SACOS, you can be covered for both the physical structure and contents of your home.

Furthermore, the standard SACOS Home Insurance Policy can help you recover loss or damage resulting not just from floods and storms alone, but from fires, lightings, explosions, burst pipes and burglaries, as well. …and that is just the tip of the iceberg.

At additional terms and conditions to be agreed, if through some unforeseeable event such as a flood your home becomes temporarily uninhabitable; SACOS can assist you with the cost of an alternative accommodation. On the same note, if you are renting out the house and your tenants cannot live in it due to the water damage sustained; SACOS can cover part of your recorded loss of rent.

SACOS Householder’s Policy can even cover your legal liability to the public if you are found to be legally liable of causing injury or damage to a third party as owner/occupier of the insured building. Burglary is now sadly rampant in our communities.

Therefore, if a burglar were to break into your house, SACOS will be there to offer more than just some moral support.

Kirschlee says:

Truly, there is so much that SACOS can do for you. You need only

Lana was one of my very first clients in Seychelles, as well as one of the people that motivated me to move to Seychelles and help people like her. The very first day we met, Lana made a huge impact on me. She put her complete trust in me, having tried so many different diets and failing in the past and that was a huge honor for me. She never questioned or doubted my plan for her. She never lost faith even during difficult times when we reached sticking points in the diet, Lana never quit!!! Lana is a fighter, a role model and an inspiration to many. Her attitude and the fact that she took control of her life and health, often to the ridicule of friends, speaks volumes about this remarkable lady. We have come very far, but this progress is still in its infancy. For Lana, the best is yet to come.

to find out with SACOS, just how you can live your daily life with the comfort and peace of mind from knowing that no matter what, you and your family have more than just a backup plan.

Don’t wait for the day that you regret not having any insurance.

Just think of it as saving for a rainy or bad day.

Contact SACOS Insurance Company Ltd on 4295 000, or visit us at the SACOS Tower, Palm Street, Victoria.

SACOS - Rest Assured, Be Insured Contributed by SACOS Insurance Company Ltd.

SBC Vibes Cable Tunes Awards Show 2014 – Siport Artis Lokal!

The sounds at the SBC Vibes Cable Tunes Award Show turned up a notch November 29, 2014 as the resounding music of a live band replaced the usual backing tracks, for the entire event. The 5th of its kind, the show drew a much larger crowd at the Espace grounds, a different venue, in the outdoors, which also added to the vibrant ambience of the night.

subscribers at the end of the year, as well as the prestige it gives to artists and their career in the music industry, all add value to the service and to the annual event. We thank all voters and we assure artists we will keep true to our slogan, ‘Siport Artis Lokal’, and all can expect a bigger and better Vibes Cable Tunes Award 2015.’

Although thunder and lightning seemed threatening at the start, once the sky was still the little rainfall which remained did little to dampen the spirits of, both, artists and the audience. It was a night to remember as the show proved more thrilling at each performance and the prizes, as voted by customers, were as follows:

About Cable & Wireless Seychelles Cable & Wireless Seychelles is leading the introduction of choice for customers supported by an ongoing commitment to quality, value and customer care in all areas of service. Our offering includes fixed line, mobile and broadband services for residential customers and tailored solutions for business customers. Our experience and reliability as the leading Telecoms Company in Seychelles sets us apart - customers get more when they choose Cable & Wireless.

For further information about Cable & Wireless Seychelles, go to: www. cwseychelles.com For further information: Terry Servina, Manager Public Relations – Cable & Wireless Seychelles (4284004)

Best Male Artist- Regi Best Female Artist- Sandra Best New Artist- Lana Best Single- Million Butterfly (Lana) Best Group\Duo- KJ & Extra Big Best Collaboration- Koz Mon Fanm (Regi & Cusmun) Best SBC Vibes Music Video- Lanmour Enposib (Tania) Best Selling Artist - Extra Big Best Performance – Tania (voted after the show)

Each received a trophy from Cable & Wireless and other prizes sponsored by the same, Takamaka Bay, Seybrew, La Plage, Heineken and Air Seychelles.

‘The show keeps getting better each year,’ says Albert Duncan, marketing executive. ‘The excitement it brings to Cable Tunes

FEBRUARY 2015 | POTPOURRI

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HEALTH & FITNESS

EVERY BEAUTY

NEEDS A BEAST

But afterwards, as she sees her progress, she thanks me. And the same goes vice-versa! Being in the gym with my woman makes me push myself harder, lift heavier, go that little bit further. I’m under absolutely no illusion that this is purely a male ego thing, but who cares?! It works! And I’ve never been happier in my relationship!

Approximately 100% of men (that figure may be exaggerated) claim that they’d be happier in their relationship if their woman was less stressed and nagging at home. Voila! Exercise releases lots of endorphins

“My lovely lady and i train together all the time. In the gym i’m quite sure she can’t stand me. I push her to her absolute limits and she curses at me with a vocabulary similar to that of someone who has glass in their eye. But afterwards, as she sees her progress, she thanks me”. (feel-good hormones) and helps reduce the level of cortisol (stress hormone) in your bloodstream. So much so that exercise is more and more commonly prescribed by medical professionals as a treatment for clinical depression!

Furthermore, ladies, I’m going to let you in on a secret. Whilst the man in your life may love you and enjoy spending time with you, WE ARE SICK OF HEARING YOUR SELF-CRITICISM! It’s extremely hard to hear a person you care about – or even love – constantly putting themselves down and complaining about how they look! We don’t want to tell you to shut up, so we listen to the endless tirade of things you hate about your body. Thankfully, we now know that there is a third way! A way where everybody wins!

As we all know, this month it’s my birthday! Some people may also know that it’s Valentine’s Day; the day of love. The day which all women love and all men forget. The day when many of us are reminded just how much we love our significant other, or how alone we are.

In honour of this magnificent and prestigious holiday (pfffft, please), I thought it fitting to talk about those people who decide to take their relationship to the next level. No, not marriage. You know the ones. They are likely dominating your Facebook or Instagram feed right now. Any idea? No? The “fitness fanatic” couple!

Studies show that couples who undertake a project together tend to have a stronger relationship. For example, if you and your partner buy a run-down old house and decide to renovate it together, you will undoubtedly get on each other’s nerves and shout at each other using language you didn’t even realize you knew! However, when the house is done and you live in it together, your bond will be much stronger having worked together to achieve a common goal.

Of course, we aren’t all in a position in life which allows us to buy up ruined properties and transform them into beautiful homes. But fear not, there is one project which we can ALL take on: OURSELVES! Training together is a great way to forge a closer relationship with your partner. You’ll find out things about each other that you never knew; all whilst working on that all-important common goal!

My lovely lady and I train together all the time. In the gym I’m quite sure she can’t stand me. I push her to her absolute limits and she curses at me with a vocabulary similar to that of someone who has glass in their eye.

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You get the body you want and your man doesn’t have to hear your self-loathing every time you walk past a mirror… or window...or polished surface...or car.

So this Valentine’s Day, try something different! Train together; train hard! You’ll get better results than ever and, take it from me, your relationship will flourish!

Happy Valentine’s Day! Until next time...

Yours in Health & Fitness, Hassan.

P.S. If you are a man and reading this, unfortunately you may still have to buy flowers and/or chocolate…Sucks, I know.

Hassan is a Master Trainer from the European Institute of Fitness, living on Mahe. For any further advice on health and fitness, you can contact Hassan directly on: Tel: +248 2568629 Email: h.al-ameri@hotmail.co.uk

Ideally, in a more sustainable world, all of us would be walking, riding our bicycles, paddling kayaks and taking the bus to get around instead of driving cars. Cars cause pollution and contribute about 10% of global greenhouse gas emissions causing climate change. They also take up a lot of space on the planet in terms of area set aside for roads, for car manufacturing factories, for oil extraction and for the refineries that produce the fuel most cars require.

But many of us have a car, and for good reason – cars are comfortable, convenient and an efficient way to get from A to B. So the question remains - is it possible to own a car and be eco-friendly?

Alternatives to cars are always better, but…

If you really need or want a car you can consider the following points:

SMALL IS BEAUTIFUL

Cars with small engines use a lot less fuel than large cars (and you also pay a reduced road tax). Many small cars are designed to be quite fuelefficient as well. If you are single and need motorized transport you might even consider just getting a moped or motorcycle (and invest in a good raincoat) instead of a car.

HYBRID CARS

Many car manufacturers produce one or more models of hybrid cars. A hybrid car runs on fuel and on electric batteries – it has a small gasoline engine as well as an electric motor, which also functions as a generator to charge up the batteries. It depends on the model, but hybrid cars tend to use about 30% less fuel (and therefore produce 30% fewer greenhouse gas emissions) than their gasoline counterparts. However, large hybrid cars can use more fuel than smaller gasoline cars, so buying a large hybrid car defeats the intended purpose of helping the environment. Several car companies in Seychelles already import hybrids upon order, and other companies are seriously considering it. Besides the environmental advantages of a hybrid – the trades tax is also less than standard cars, at only 15%.

ELECTRIC CARS

Electric cars run on an electric motor, powered by a battery that is usually charged up at home overnight. These cars are most eco-friendly if the battery is being charged up with electricity from renewable energy sources, like solar or wind. If you are charging the battery by plugging the car into PUC, it is drawing on electricity produced mainly by the PUC generators burning fossil fuels and producing greenhouse gas emissions.

Electric car motors tend to be quite efficient though, so even if charged up using non-renewable energy, they produce fewer greenhouse gas emissions than standard gasoline cars. The great news is that a couple of companies in Seychelles are now importing electric cars - PMC is selling the Mahindra e2o and the Nissan Leaf, and E-Cars is selling the GEM, Mega-Aixam and Goupil. The price for the smaller models is under SR300,000 – not too bad! Depending on the model and the terrain, electric cars can get about 100km per charge, which is perfect for most people living and working in Seychelles. And the duty on electric cars has just been reduced to only 5%. It’s worth checking out!

For more information about eco-cars try the following websites: http://www.greencarreports.com http://www.greenercars.org http://www.thegreencarwebsite.co.uk http://www.greenvehicleguide.gov.au/GVGPublicUI/Home.aspx http://mahindrareva.com/ http://www.nissan.co.za/en-ZA/Vehicles/Leaf.aspx www.ecarseychelles.com

Contributed by Sustainability for Seychelles (S4S), a local NGO whose mission is to promote sustainable living in Seychelles. For more info about our work contact us: Email: info@s4seychelles.com Tel. 422-4072 / 251-9135. Address: Suite A9 Arpent Vert, Mont Fleuri. Website: www.s4seychelles.com or find us on Facebook.

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CONSERVATION

ECO-CARS… Is there such a thing?

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MUSIC REVIEW

Shameless

The Dawn of The One-Man Boy Band 2014 was a great year for Justin Beiber; he escaped a prison sentence more than once, extended his fan base by a cool couple of million, got gifted a private jet for Christmas, and followed in Mark Whalberg’s footsteps to become Calvin Klein’s latest underwear model.

But get this, the kid hasn’t released any new music in a while. It’s my humble opinion that if you’re to be taken seriously in the entertainment industry (a hard task for Justin, even on his best day), the first thing you need to do is make good on your commitment to the public. Beibs’ unwritten commitment as a ‘musician’ is to release new music and, hopefully, to ensure that said music is as original and interesting as possible. Instead, young Justin has casually assaulted a couple of the working class folks who have to put up with his rich kid antics, flown from party to party in his new jet and written some pretty obnoxious tweets.

Where do the fans stand during all of this? Well thankfully for the young Canadian pop icon, his core fan base is made up of kids who almost exclusively lack the self-awareness and basic literacy skills needed to ever see through his mess of a career. Instead, Justin’s ‘Beliebers’ will follow him into a raging volcano, regardless of how many limo drivers he spits on, how shamelessly he promotes poorly photoshopped images of himself in tight, repackaged (Ahem...) underwear, or how infrequently he addresses real world issues while he’s sky-high, sipping stupidly priced champagne and making his elders feel worthless.

The truth behind this Beiber phenomenon, and the sole reason why the boy can get away with anything short of murdering someone on live TV, is that the average teenage listener still has an unspoken desire to be part of something perfect.

Now, anyone with half an ounce of sense knows that perfection is a rare beast that is impossible to see, let alone catch, but anyone who actually spent money on a Westlife album or worked out bedroom dance routines to ‘Barbie Girl’ will be able to relate whole-heartedly to what a 13 year-old girl from Toronto feels when she hears/sees/ smells Justin Beiber. I know this, because I am still the proud owner of ‘Millennium’ by the Backstreet Boys.

The problem with the Beiber paradigm is that instead of relating to the artist that most closely represents your own likes and dislikes, as you could with any boy band over the past 20 years (everyone had their favourite member), you’re forced to alter your likes and dislikes in order to accommodate the artist. The artist who you pay. The artist who now has a complete subconscious hold over your fashion sense, your musical taste, your online presence and, most disturbingly, your outward personality. This mass assimilation is what makes Beibs so dangerous and, beyond that, what makes him so despicable as a ‘role model’. The kid knows half the world is watching, and that millions of teeny boppers follow his every move but he still acts like he does?

I reckon that until the dude stops playing this ‘Canadian Wonder Boy Gangster’ role and actually knuckles down to make some music that will earn him a place in history, the world should forget about Justin. #justsaying

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