Philadelphia City Paper, March 1st, 2012 by Philadelphia City Paper

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NEWS | The protest professor

SEXY TIME | Wherefore art thou, sanity? SUITE SPOT | Hobo maestro

30 YEARS OF INDEPENDENT JOURNALISM

Photos by NEAL SANTOS

March 8 - March 14, 2012 #1397 |

www.citypaper.net

BRIDGE

THE

SCENES FROM KENSINGTON’S DIEHARD, UNDERGROUND POOL LEAGUE. Words by DANIEL DENVIR

Experience the Power of a Fox Professional Masters Degree—see page 11

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We made this

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Publisher Nancy Stuski Editor in Chief Theresa Everline Senior Editor Patrick Rapa News Editor Samantha Melamed Web Editor/Food Editor Drew Lazor Arts Editor/Copy Chief Emily Guendelsberger Associate Editor/Movies Editor Josh Middleton Senior Writer Isaiah Thompson Staff Writer Daniel Denvir Assistant Copy Editor Carolyn Wyman Contributors Sam Adams, A.D. Amorosi, Janet Anderson, Rodney Anonymous, Mary Armstrong, Nancy Armstrong, Meg Augustin, Justin Bauer, Shaun Brady, Peter Burwasser, Anthony Campisi, Ryan Carey, Jane Cassady, Mark Cofta, Felicia D’Ambrosio, Jesse Delaney, Adam Erace, M.J. Fine, David Anthony Fox, Cindy Fuchs, K. Ross Hoffman, Brian Howard, Deni Kasrel, Gary M. Kramer, Gair “Dev 79” Marking, Robert McCormick, Andrew Milner, Cassie Owens, Michael Pelusi, Nathaniel Popkin, Robin Rice, Lee Stabert, Andrew Thompson, Tom Tomorrow, Char Vandermeer, John Vettese, Bruce Walsh, Julia West, Brian Wilensky Editorial Interns Beth Boyle, Chris Brown, James Friel, Michael Gold, Al Harris, Katie Linton, Abigail Minor, Courtney Sexton, Alexandra Weiss, Nina Wilbach Associate Web Editor/Staff Photographer Neal Santos Production Director Michael Polimeno Editorial Art Director Reseca Peskin Senior Designer Evan M. Lopez Editorial Designer Matt Egger Contributing Photographers Jessica Kourkounis, Mark Stehle Contributing Illustrators Ryan Casey, Don Haring Jr., Joel Kimmel, Thomas Pitilli, Matthew Smith Human Resources Ron Scully (ext. 210) Office Manager/Sales Coordinator/Financial Coordinator Tricia Bradley (ext. 232) Circulation Director Mark Burkert (ext. 239) Senior Account Managers Nick Cavanaugh (ext. 260), Sharon MacWilliams (ext. 262), Stephan Sitzai (ext. 258) Account Managers Sara Carano (ext. 228), Chris Scartelli (ext. 215), Donald Snyder (ext. 213) Marketing/Online Coordinator Jennifer Francano (ext. 252) Office Coordinator/Adult Advertising Sales Alexis Pierce (ext. 234) Founder & Editor Emeritus Bruce Schimmel

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Philadelphia City Paper is published and distributed every Thursday in Philadelphia, Montgomery, Chester, Bucks & Delaware Counties, in South Jersey and in Northern Delaware. Philadelphia City Paper is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. Additional copies may be purchased from our main office at $1 per copy. No person may, without prior written permission from Philadelphia City Paper, take more than one copy of each issue. Pennsylvania law prohibits any person from inserting printed material of any kind into any newspaper without the consent of the owner or publisher. Contents copyright © 2012, Philadelphia City Paper. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced without written permission from the publisher. Philadelphia City Paper assumes no obligation (other than cancellation of charges for actual space occupied) for accidental errors in advertising, but will be glad to furnish a signed letter to the buying public.

contents Cue balls in hand

Naked City ...................................................................................6 Arts & Entertainment.........................................................22 Movies.........................................................................................31 Agenda........................................................................................34 Food & Drink ...........................................................................42

COVER PHOTOGRAPH BY NEAL SANTOS DESIGN BY RESECA PESKIN

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CP’s Quality-o-Life-o-Meter

[-1]

A priest from Northeast Philly is arrested for attempting to solicit sex from a cop disguised as a prostitute in Kensington. “Relatively speaking,” shrugs Cardinal Rigali, “this is the best press we’ve gotten in years.”

[+1] U.S. Marshals capture a West Philly man

convicted of tax fraud who’d previously escaped state custody by forging his own release papers. But then while the prisoner is in the bathroom, the feds get a call from the president and he’s like, “Let this guy go, that’s an order!”

[+1] Two art dealers in the New Hope area have stolen items returned to them, giftwrapped, by an unknown person suspected to be a depressed kleptomaniac. Or an amoral re-gifter.

[0 ]

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[ -5 ]

[ -3 ]

Three teenagers in Kensington steal a school bus and abandon it after a short joyride, according to police. They suspect the kids are nondepressed kleptomaniacs. A Chadds Ford man is arrested for driving his SUV through a fence and onto a runway at Philadelphia International Airport, forcing a plane to pull up to avoid a collision. “OK, now, this guy was probably depressed,” says an officer on the scene. “Kleptomania TBD.” NBC 10 interviews “Eric,” a man from Philly who used an illegal jamming device to prevent fellow bus passengers from using their cell phones. And get this: He’s a total douche.

[ 2]

After his nominating petitions are challenged, Nate Kleinman, an Occupy Philly protestor turned congressional candidate, withdraws from the Democratic primary ballot in favor of a write-in campaign. So that’s the last we’ll hear of that guy.

[ +1]

A major exhibition coming to the Franklin Institute in May will feature several of the Dead Sea Scrolls, a three-ton stone from the Wailing Wall and artifacts allegedly recovered from the “Jesus Family Tomb.” Plus a guy dressed like Boba Fett handing out candy.

This week’s total: -8 | Last week’s total: -6

HEATED DEBATE: The city is considering selling off PGW, the public utility that owns the Passyunk Plant shown here. NEAL SANTOS

[ public works ]

UTILITY PLAYERS A consultant who might also be a bidder has advised the city to sell off PGW. For customers, it could be a perilous gamble. By Daniel Denvir

n 2007, the massive Texas utility company TXU was sold to a private-equity firm, on the advice of George Bilicic of mega-firm Lazard. It was the biggest leveraged buyout in history. Lazard made a tidy $13.5 million fee; Bilicic went on to work for the bankers who bought the utility. As for the utility itself? Energy Future Holdings (as TXU is now called) is now spiraling into debt so deep that Warren Buffett recently apologized for investing in it. Now the same consultant (Bilicic) at the same company (Lazard) is advising Mayor Michael Nutter on a plan for a similar sale, this time of Philadelphia Gas Works (PGW), the city-owned utility. Potential conflicts of interest aside, consumer advocates contend a sale could hurt ratepayers and the 109,000 poor and elderly that rely on subsidized gas heat. But Nutter, citing a report by Lazard, says it could free the city from major financial liabilities, including costly pensions. “We’re moving forward in the process to sell PGW,” says city budget director Rebecca Rhynhart. “But it doesn’t mean that we can’t pull back if the pricing doesn’t come in as we want,” or if conditions to maintain social subsidies for poor residents are not met. Yet Community Legal Services attorney and ratepayer advocate Phil Bertocci worries customers could “pay much more than they would pay if PGW remains under city ownership.”

Others share his concerns. “For someone to be able to capture a profit, they’re going to have to do it through rate increases and slashing employees,” says City Controller Alan Butkovitz. A private company might be able to invest in much-needed infrastructure repairs of thousands of miles of decrepit cast-iron pipelines. But Philadelphians could end up funding that via higher rates. “The more you spend on capital repairs [as a privately owned utility], you get a guaranteed return,” says Butkovitz. A private PGW would be a regulated monopoly. “It’s not like the free market.” Those concerns make City Council approval uncertain. Councilwoman Maria Quiñones-Sánchez thinks a private company would cut subsidies.“I don’t see how they would ever convince me to go along with it,” she tells CP. Indeed, those subsidies are the main reason PGW rates are so extraordinarily high. Unlike New Jersey, Pennsylvania does not share the cost of subsidies statewide. In 2010, Philadelphians paid nearly eight times more than our suburban neighbors — an average of $200.58 apiece — to support PGW’s programs for the poor. The city insists it would require a private company to maintain the programs, but future owners could petition the state Public Utilities Commission to reduce benefits. The Lazard study concludes that gas utilities, when merged with private companies, are able to realize efficiencies through economies of scale. But a 1999 study by Public Financial Management found that to sell at a profit, PGW would have to inflict “significant” layoffs

“To profit, they’ll have to slash employees.”

>>> continued on page 8

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[ a million stories ]

✚ WRONG SIDE OF THE BEDS Across the city, urban farmers are clearing their raised beds, picking up the litter from their lots and sowing the seeds for a summertime bounty. It’s a time of rebirth, of hope — and of frustration. The city administration is preparing to reveal its long-awaited plan for selling and leasing its massive inventory of vacant land for a variety of uses — among them growing vegetables. The problem is that Philly’s urban farmers don’t know what those policies will be, exactly — and what they’ve seen so far hasn’t exactly impressed. In December, a draft of the vacant-land policy was circulated on the Philadelphia Urban Farming Network listserv. To farmers’ unpleasant surprise, the document made no mention of “farming” per se, and instead referred only to leasing city land for “gardens,” which would be “non-commercial” or for “sale that is incidental in nature.” Worse still, in their eyes, was language asserting that “Urban Garden Agreements” would last only a year at a time and could be terminated “at any time, with or without cause” — though the city would use “reasonable efforts” to avoid terminating an agreement mid-season. “You’re investing in a whole list of things, from soil testing to temporary or permanent structures,” says Amy Laura Cahn, of the Public Interest Law Center’s Garden Justice Legal Initiative, “but the city could at any time take [the land] back.” Following online discussions and meetings, representatives of the city’s farming community signed a series of letters to the city’s Managing Director’s Office and Redevelopment Authority, outlining their concerns — but they haven’t heard back.The Managing Director’s Office emphasized that City Paper had seen only an early draft copy — but wouldn’t comment on whether or how the language

around farming may have changed since.

—Isaiah Thompson

✚ ROAD RAGE Henry Avenue is a curvy, four-lane road with no median and infrequent traffic lights — a combination that regularly results in bad outcomes. Since Feb. 13 alone, on the stretch of Henry running from East Falls north through Roxborough, two people were killed and one careening car demolished a signpost. One of the deaths was pedestrian Alonzo Lewis, 77, struck while crossing Henry at School House Lane — the main intersection in the middle of Philadelphia University. That crossroads has an unfortunate track record.“Philadelphia University began petitioning state and city officials in 1988 for a study of traffic flow and pedestrian use of the intersection,” writes PhillyU president Stephen Spinelli in an email. He offers a laundry list of the unfulfilled requests they’ve made to calm traffic, ranging from delayed signal changes to speed limit reductions to roadside planters. One thing PhillyU did on its own: In 2002, it hired Philadelphia Police officers to work two daily shifts monitoring the intersection, manually operating the traffic light and assisting pedestrian crossings, at an annual cost of $151,000, according to Spinelli. Despite that investment, Rich Campbell, who lives on Henry Avenue in East Falls, witnesses speeding, close calls and crashes all the time. Campbell, who has complained to his councilman and the Streets Department, estimates that motorcycles and illegal ATVs racing down the avenue reach speeds of nearly 100 mph. The recent accidents prompted the city to plop down an electronic “your speed is” sign on Henry. “It is impossible to drive the posted speed limit of 35 mph and feel even remotely safe,” explains Campbell. “You get tailgated and yelled at.” —Theresa Everline

photostream ³ submit to photostream@citypaper.net

KEVIN J. RIMKUNAS

By Isaiah Thompson

LOSING COUNT ³ A FEW WEEKS ago, the city’s Board of Ethics

turned heads when it announced a settlement with newly elected City Commissioner Stephanie Singer and her campaign treasurer, Ellen Chapman, for violating city campaign-finance laws. Singer’s campaign, on the eve of her primary race against decades-long incumbent Marge Tartaglione, accepted excess campaign contributions and, maybe more disturbingly, failed to report those donations during the pre-primary 24-hour reporting cycle. Among them, one Liz Kaplan wrote checks in the name of her husband and son, but all from her own checking account. Singer also accepted contributions from Daniel Singer, her father, totalling $4,700 ($2,100 more than the legal limit), which the campaign blamed on poor record-keeping. Singer had self-reported the errors, the Ethics Board noted. But it was the second time her campaign had been found to have broken the rules: Last year, the Board of Ethics found Singer had made tens of thousands of dollars of last-minute expenditures on her personal credit card (not allowed). The news was somewhat surprising: Singer had run a campaign of reform and good government. Even more surprising was Hall Monitor’s discovery this week that Chapman, whose job it was to keep the books clean, has been appointed by Singer to the coveted job of deputy city commissioner, a position Singer’s predecessor, Tartaglione, had handed to her own daughter, Renee Tartaglione Matos. (Renee had to leave the position after she was found to have broken the law by doing election work on the job — which involves monitoring election work.) Singer defends the choice of Chapman, describing her as “reliable, smart and trustworthy.” Singer, who pledged to take “politics out of elections,” also hired ousted committeewoman and political ally Tracey Gordon. It’s not unusual — or necessarily untoward — for elected officials to appoint those close to them. Presidents do it, mayors do it and city commissioners do it. Republican Al Schmidt, another successful reform candidate for the City Commissioners Office, hired two campaign staffers as deputies, explaining, they “share my work ethic and share my ideas.” Zack Stalberg, of the good government group the Committee of Seventy, agrees: “People get involved in campaigns for the opportunity to work in government down the road. That’s a legitimate motive.” Fair enough, says Hall Monitor: Hopefully the work Singer’s staff performs in the City Commission will be a little tidier than it was on the campaign trail. ✚ Send feedback to isaiah.thompson@citypaper.net

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You Go Girl

hallmonitor

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[ is a laundry list of unfulfilled requests ]

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✚ Utility Players

[ the naked city ]

<<< continued from page 6

and “essentially eliminate” social programs. But the PGW of the late 1990s was a different company: Mismanagement and heavy debt forced the city to issue a $45 million loan in 2000. That debt has since been repaid, and PGW has trimmed personnel by nearly 40 percent since 1988 and boosted collections to more than 98 percent. PGW is still laden with $1.142 billion in long-term debt. But it is no longer paying it off with new debt, and the company has resumed delivering its $18 million franchise payment to the city. Most everyone compliments PGW’s current management — which is precisely what perplexes gas workers. “We’re against the sale,” says Keith Holmes, president of Gas Workers Local 686, which represents 1,138 PGW employees. He says the city’s proposed conditions for a sale, which require a new owner to honor the current collective bargaining agreement, do not promise much: The contract expires in May 2015. He’s angry that workers made concessions to rebuild the company only to see it potentially sold out from under them. Privatizing PGW is a perennial City Hall thought experiment, and the current budget crises makes a sell-off especially attractive. In July 2010, Nutter quietly spent $200,000 of ratepayer funds to commission the Lazard study. While Rhynhart says the city will hold out for a profit, the study’s conclusions are cautious, suggesting the city could “exit its PGW ownership and operating requirements at little or no cost (and potentially at a profit).” To discover the actual price, the city will hire a financial consultant to manage the sale. While the city hasn’t yet decided on a pay structure for such a consultant, Rhynhart notes that, often, consultants are paid only if a sale goes through. That poses a potential conflict of interest. Indeed, Lazard might stand to profit from their recommendations: potentially drawing a fee for managing the sale and later profiting from investments in a privatized PGW. First, Lazard tells CP it does hope to manage the sale. Second, Lazard proposed, among other possibilities, PGW’s sale to an infrastructure fund; Lazard happens to have a strategic relationship with such a fund, the Lazard Global Listed Infrastructure Portfolio. Finally, two of the six potential buyers Lazard interviewed for the PGW study were Lazard clients. Bilicic denies any conflicts. And William Cohan, a financial journalist and former Lazard banker, says the arrangement is normal for Wall Street. “It may be offensive on the street level, but that’s not unusual,” Cohan says. “What would be unusual is if at the end of that process the fund that Lazard controlled ended up buying that utility.” But Bart Naylor of the watchdog Public Citizen calls that Wall Street status quo wrong. “It’s certainly a conflict to say, ‘How would you like to assess a proposal whereby some investment bank will make a big fee and it might be you?’” he tells CP. Though Cohan says they have long since cleaned house, Lazard has given cities horrible advice in the past. In 1995, the firm and Merrill Lynch paid a $3.64 million settlement to Washington, D.C., after allegations of an undisclosed conflict of

interest, recommending the city buy interest-rate swaps while marketing those same swaps for Merrill. Lazard and Merrill also paid $24 million in fines for alleged fraud perpetrated against government entities. In 1998, Lazard paid $9 million to the Los Angeles Metropolitan Transportation Agency to settle allegations of fraud in the municipal-bond market. The proposal to sell PGW comes amid a nationwide wave of privatizations by cashstrapped local governments. While privatization can make cities money in the short term, contracts often have clauses that can cost money and work against the public good down the line. Chicago’s 2009 privatization of parking meters prompted meter increases and a potential $10 billion in lost revenue over

“It may be offensive, but that’s not unusual.” the 75-year life of the contract. The city must also compensate private owners when they close a street for maintenance or a parade. Likewise, so-called “noncompete clauses” for privatized highways have blocked governments from making improvements on “competing” public roads. Former Gov. Ed Rendell came under fire for his failed proposal to privatize the Pennsylvania Turnpike because Morgan Stanley, contracted to manage the process, was to be paid only if a sale went through. Bilicic says it’s unlikely a noncompete clause would be included in a contract to privatize PGW. But Penn State law professor Ellen Dannin says it is possible that the city’s future support for alternative energy, or subsidies to winterize and decrease gas use, could violate a contract provision. “People who have an uneasy feeling,” Dannin says, “are right to feel that way.” (daniel.denvir@citypaper.net)

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[ activism ]

MAN OF ACTION George Lakey has made a career of speaking out for peace, civil rights and, most recently, the impacts of strip-mining in Appalachia — and he could teach Occupy a thing or two. By Samantha Melamed

t’s approximately one minute into an interview with George Lakey, and already things are getting interesting. Asked if he would mind being recorded, Lakey laughs. “I’ve been recorded by the FBI enough times over the years. It’s nice to be recorded openly and transparently for a change.” After all, Lakey — an activist, Swarthmore peace-studies professor and civil-disobedience trainer who, at age 74, is about to walk across Pennsylvania to protest PNC Bank’s financing of mountaintop-removal coal mining — has a bio that reads like a recap of the last half-century’s major social and human-rights conflicts. “When I was a kid, studying history in high school, I thought, ‘I’d like to be a part of history and not just watch it,’” he admits. And so he has, going back to the 1950s and ’60s, when he trained protesters for Freedom Summer and sailed (a few years in advance of the tide of popular opinion) on the second humanitarian voyage of the Phoenix to Vietnam, “to the enormous annoyance of the U.S. government, which had troops in the area and didn’t want any Quakers running around with a peace message.” He’s participated in actions and trained protesters and peacekeepers in South Africa, Cambodia, the former Soviet Union, Puerto Rico and across the United States. It’s a biography that could almost as easily be told in arrest

reports: in 1962, at a sit-in for racial integration in Chester, Pa.; in the ’70s, after coming out as gay, at an anti-discrimination protest at the U.S. Supreme Court; and just recently at a PNC Bank office, where he and the environmental advocacy group he helped found, Earth Quaker Action Team, were pursuing the mountaintop-removal coal-mining issue. The group is currently gathering pledges to withdraw funds from PNC, and Lakey is soliciting participants to join his 16-day walk to PNC’s Pittsburgh headquarters. Given that PNC was founded as a Quaker bank, he says he has the obligation to take it to task for funding a practice that’s disastrous both to the environment and to the health of surrounding communities in Appalachia. There has never, he says, been a dearth of causes demanding his attention. “In each decade, there’s been some important work going on, but one reason the 1960s were so iconic is because the ’50s were so boring. We had been referred to by Dwight Eisenhower as ‘God’s frozen people.’” Lakey wants to make sure we remain unfrozen. Back in 1992, he founded the nonprofit Training for Change to spread the gospel of nonviolent action; he’s also published eight books on social change. More recently, he’s been working to advance both the scholarly pursuit of peace studies and the tactical knowledge of demonstrators with Swarthmore’s newly launched Global Nonviolent Action Database, an online catalog

[ the naked city ]

of more than 600 sit-ins, marches, campaigns and actions from 190 countries, dating back as far as 1170 B.C.E. Nonviolent activism, he points out, “is a long-established craft, and we can learn these techniques.” One movement Lakey thinks could benefit from reviewing the database is Occupy Wall Street. While Occupy’s mass actions have been successful in spreading its message thus far, he says what Occupy needs now are campaigns, public education and neighborhood outreach. For example, he sees the salvaging of public education as a fight that Occupy could take on. “There’s no reason for Philadelphia to accept its school district being flushed down the toilet by the 1 percent. Philadelphia as a city can rise up, led by the Occupy movement,” he argues. He likens the proposition to 1963 Birmingham, Ala., where Martin Luther King Jr.’s nonviolent disruption of a major industrialized city triggered the passage of the Civil Rights Act. “We could do that,” Lakey says. “Philadelphia could force a change.” (samantha@citypaper.net)

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philadelphia covered. we’ve got __ [ the naked city ]

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EL BAR 1.4.2012

the naked city

Drew, a player for El Bar, racks up the balls for a Wednesday-night game, part of the Jim Celebre Memorial Pool League.

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SCENES FROM KENSINGTONâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S DIEHARD, UNDERGROUND POOL LEAGUE.

Photos by NEAL SANTOS Words by DANIEL DENVIR

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BRIDGE

THE

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OLD PHILADELPHIA BAR 12.7.2011

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Seen in reflection, El Bar team captain Eddie considers his next move while co-captain Reese watches. El Bar player Bob (bottom left) takes a shot. Mickey, Old Philadelphia’s top shit-talker, shows off his eight-ball tattoo.

veryone in the Jim Celebre Memorial Pool League knows that Foto Club is the team to beat. Yet there is some debate among the men who shoot for Tailgators (who are not shooting so well tonight at the 3 Fish Pub in Port Richmond) as to why. “They’re all from West Philly, Southwest Philly,” says one Tailgator. “None of them near Foto Club,” an after-hours bar on Frankford Avenue. “We used to have the bomb squad,” says another. “We never played this bad.” “Something with this table.” Other teams raise suspicion, too. “They got a good team, Old Philly.” “That’s because they buy their players,” a Tailgator responds.

The row house blocks that stretch through the river wards of Fishtown and Port Richmond and across deindustrialized Kensington have long been riven by meager opportunities for good work, active drug markets and racial conflict. But this neighborhood retains ties less visible to outsiders, including an archipelago of bars with pool teams that every Wednesday night ferry men away from wives and children, and into foreign watering holes. “This is Kensington, technically, this side of Frankford,” says Franny, Old Philly’s captain. “When I was a kid, I didn’t go over there.” He points to Frankford Avenue, where “Fishtown kids” once stood ready to brawl. To the east, “We were fighting with blacks and Puerto Ricans.” Neighborhoods formed defensible fortresses. “We’d have to stay in a four- to five-block vicin-

ity,” he says. “We had corners … the Swoop Troop, the Bomb Squad, the WTO.” Short for “We’re The Ones,” or maybe “Whites Taking Over.” At Old Philadelphia, a bar on East Dauphin Street, whites, blacks and what a fair observer might call hipsters — the El Bar is visiting — play pool. One black player wears an Old Philly polo. “No, no,” says Franny, contemplating changing demographics and values. “Back in the day, blacks weren’t even supposed to be on this side of the El.” One member of Old Philly tells me the El Bar plays “nigger pool.” Yet pool now clearly trumps old racial hostilities: Franny prematurely sinks the eight-ball and then throws the cue. Face in hands, he says the game had, for a variety of reasons, gone wrong from the beginning. >>> continued on page 16

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Tailgators player Don (below) watches a game underway. Rashid (right) chalks his cue before shooting for Tailgators. Teammate Matt shows off a “white pride” tattoo.

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3 FISH PUB 1.4.2012

“My buddy got beat with a brick over his head, so he can’t see over one eye,” says Franny, lifting his face. “He was having trouble shooting.” Another player blames City Paper’s photographer: “My man flashed the camera while he was shooting.” The bartender, who parries with ballbusting men for a living, doesn’t buy it. “If they miss the shot,” she smiles, “they’ll look for any excuse.” The league, however, manages to keep poolrelated anger in check. Fights are rare. “With pool, there’s a lot of rules involved,” El Bar co-captain Reese tells me, picking up an overstuffed folder of league regulations. “You have rivalries, a lot of trash-talking between the bars, people that hate each other,” says Brian, the team captain and owner of Tailgators Sports Bar in Fishtown. Some players, he says, specialize in it. Take Mickey, who shoots for Old Philly. “Mickey, all he does is talk shit. … Part of some teams’ strategy is to have a shit-talker. And he doesn’t talk shit to the bad players, he talks shit to the good ones to get them off their game.” One Wednesday night at 3 Fish, some guys are talking shit about the entrepreneurs who opened Memphis Taproom, which replaced local watering hole Walt’s — and, says Tailgators shooter Don,

displaced their pool team midseason. “Memphis Taproom is for hipsters,” says teammate Matt, a thickly muscled man with pending assault charges and “white pride” tattooed across his biceps. Matt, who says he loves breaking balls, might be this team’s shit-talker. If Matt’s teammate Rashid knows about his tattoos, he doesn’t seem to care. He loves his team and his Wednesday nights. “Best thing about it is: It is diverse,” he tells me. Rashid knows several of the players from North Catholic, where he was the “only black guy.” Most of the men who administer the league — copresidents Henny and Junior, and secretary Paul — play for Yesterday’s Tavern in Kensington. At an away game at the El Bar, the team sits together in a corner. Across the room, skinny jeans and a certain kind of mustache predominate. Paul is excited to be someplace new. He takes me on an impromptu tour of the bar, guiding me upstairs to show off a jam session he’s discovered on the second floor. “Wednesday night is my Friday night,” he says. At Foto Club, no one ever picks up the phone. I finally tracked them down at the Polish American Club in Port Richmond. The pool table is in the back, separated by a low-slung partition from two bowl>>> continued on page 18

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Tim of Foto Club (in the foreground) approaches the table while Polish American Club members look on. Foto Club captain Dave takes a cigarette break while his team members mess around, Peanut reaching for his beer and Tone enjoying a laugh.

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POLISH AMERICAN CLUB 1.18.2012

ing lanes. Teenage boys sit on ledges above the pins, jumping down to reset them after each game. The club’s century-old incorporation certificate is, notes longtime member Bill, mostly in Polish, the neighborhood’s dwindling lingua franca. “It was in its prime in the ’50s,” before the construction of I-95, the eight-lane behemoth just one block away. “It killed the neighborhood.” He recalls the bulldozed homes. “We used to have fish fights,” when the neighborhood was connected to the Delaware River. “They would dump dead fish” and kids could throw them at each other. They would go swim in the river, and then “you’d have to throw away your underwear.” “We needed I-95,” adds Bill, whose wife is one highway exit south gambling at SugarHouse Casino. “Don’t get me wrong.” I turn to Walt, outfitted in a monogrammed Foto Club shirt, a spider-web tattoo encapsulating his shaven head like an arachnid yarmulke. “We have a variety,” says Walt of the white, black and Puerto Rican shooters. “That’s why I think we’re good.” Some have played professionally and some also shoot for “the Spanish league.” Says Walt, “We had to sit out last year. We won a couple of years in a row, and a lot of guys were complaining.” I hear that Joe, watching with crossed arms, is Foto

Club’s elder statesman. Says Dave, the team captain, “He’s forgot more about pool than we will ever learn.” “I’ve been playing pool for over 50 years,” says Joe, a Port Richmond native. “When I was young, every neighborhood had a poolroom. Now you are lucky if you got three in the whole city.” Bill is worried that the Polish American Club, too, will close if they can’t get young people like his son, a soccer fan who frequents the 700 Club in Northern Liberties, to join. “I don’t understand how these guys, who don’t make any more money than me, pay $6 or $7 for a beer.” A Polish American member shouts out to a Foto Club player circling the table: “Don’t shoot with a cigarette in your mouth! Yo!” Joe used to shoot at a poolroom at Seventh and Chestnut in Center City. “Some of the best shooters in the world came in that place: Minnesota Fats. … Pool was a really big thing in Philadelphia in those days. All the best shooters in the world came out of Philly. Now they come out of Europe, Asia.” Now 73, he’s retired — but not from pool. Not ever. “Pool is an interesting game. We’re all pool-drunk.” “It’ll consume your whole life,” adds Foto Club member Frank. But his attention, like most everyone’s, quickly shifts back to the game. (daniel.denvir@citypaper.net)

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icepack By A.D. Amorosi

³ THERE’S A REASON producers/DJs Rob

Paine and Willyum called their wack house label Worship and their spinning party The Shakedown. The boys release only the holiest of daring dubanointed music and their bashes get bodies quaking. For their 10th anniversary Shakedown at the Troc, March 10, they’re throwing “the biggest production we have done” in Paine’s words with “one of the most influential house producers in the world, François K.” Also onboard is King Britt on the main stage, Josh Wink (for five hours) in the Balcony and a dynamic light show throughout the burlesque hall. “We certainly have good stories after a decade of throwing the Shakedown,” says Will. “Time flies when you’re having fun.” Along with pressing sampler vinyl compilations for sale that night, Paine’s Worship is back in full swing with monthly digital releases. Thanks for the dance decade, gents. ³ Recently deceased neocon bloggerAndrew Breitbart’spolitics weren’t everybody’s cup of tea, but he had a weird form of polarizing flair that attracted even the unlikeliest of collaborators. Even he and Naked Philadelphian blogger/Metro scribe/lefty Laura Goldman had their common denominators. “Since we are both natural-born provocateurs that shared a George Carlin-like sense of humor, Breitbart and I instantly bonded when we met,” says Goldman, who had spoken with him very recently about a new project she was going to help him with — a site called New Jerusalem. “Breitbart wanted New Jerusalem to rakishly challenge media distortions about Israel and highlight the wonderful people that live there.” ³ Kyle Costill’s Bands in the Backyard project christens its new office space at the Skyboxat 2424 Studios on March 9 with a 10-band, two-stage allages gig, with a portion of the door going to Girls Rock Philly (2424studios.com). ³ Ex-TLA film guy Richard Wolff’s Breaking Glass Pictures just hired ex-Ruffhouse flack and baseball enthusiast Evan Gusz to do whatever the hell he has to do to get things running right. It’s working. “Even though he does not want a title, he is doing an amazing job,” says Wolff. ³Long-hairedPew-grant-winning poet CAConrad has a handsome new book of prose, scribbles and diary entries, A Beautiful Marsupial Afternoon,published by Wave Books, and is having its release party with Lonely Christopher at Giovanni’s Room bookstore March 8. It starts early, 5:30 p.m. Make your presence known. ³ Costa Rica and the Cayman Islands.That’s where Will Smith and M. Night Shyamalan were filming After Earth before landing this week closer to home and real scorched-planetary territory — the warehouses and factories on West Hunting Park Avenue. ³ More ice at citypaper.net/criticalmass. (a_amorosi@citypaper.net)

SHAPESHIFTER: Byron Westbrook’s Corridors changes with each new venue it occupies. ANDRA CHITIMUS

[ experimental/video/music ]

SOUNDS INSANE Audio and video get twisted in Byron Westbrook’s strange multimedia performance project. By Shaun Brady

n a movie screen, a loss of focus reduces an image to its component parts: shape, color, movement. Experimental filmmakers have long taken advantage of that abstraction, but Byron Westbrook goes further, fuzzying the edges of sound as well. Westbrook’s multimedia show Corridors projects multiple images of morphing light, accompanied by similarly shifting patterns of sound. While both begin as concrete visual and sonic stimuli, the practical sources become unrecognizable in Westbrook’s hands. The audio is sourced from recorded improvisations, which are edited and processed to remove the identities of the actual instruments, reducing the music to bare form and texture. “I wanted to develop a project that would not be performer-centric in terms of the audience’s orientation towards the listening experience,” Westbrook explains. “At many concerts, audiences watch a performer as they listen. They see the instrument. They see the physical body in relationship to the instrument. I was not interested in conveying that information at all in this project. I wanted a more open relationship between the audience and the sound.” Rather than simply utilize electronic instruments to create noise, however, Westbrook wanted to retain some essential qualities of more traditional acoustic instruments. “But I wanted to

work with the feel of those instruments rather than try to draw the audience into any sort of visual/physical reference to the source,” he continues. “The same goes for the visual. I wanted to deconstruct the source and reconstruct it, sans reference.” Corridors is mixed live over a 5-7 channel audio system, with speakers placed strategically throughout the room. “In many ways, it’s a site-specific installation that is reinstalled and recalibrated for each performance and each space,” Westbrook says. “The pieces can change fairly dramatically from show to show, space to space. So much of the way a piece unfolds depends on the sonic response of a space. In some spaces, certain sounds can be made to take up the entire space, and in others, the same sound can exist as a single point for others to work off of. I also find that even after working with a similar set of materials — for years in some pieces — there still is potential for a space to reveal a new, undiscovered direction for the materials to go.” Ultimately, Corridors exists as a unique audiovisual experience, dependent on the whim of the performer, the vagaries of the venue, and, naturally, the experience of the audience. “The most ideal response,” Westbrook concludes, “is some sort of transportive, perception-altering experience.” (s_brady@citypaper.net)

“I wanted to deconstruct the source and reconstruct it, sans reference.”

✚ Wave Currents: Byron Westbrook, Fri., March 9, 8 p.m., $8-$10, International

House, 3701 Chestnut St., 215-387-5125, ihousephilly.org.

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[ bathed in lakeside sunset glow ] ³ local/compilation

The title of Windy and Carl’s 10th (-ish) album, We Will Always Be (Kranky), is a gently emphatic (re)assertion of the long-running Michigan couple/duo’s perseverance and singularity. The music feels much the same way. Excepting the unexpectedly Lowlike vocal opener, they never veer from the minimalist, instrumental “space-rock” path they’ve been following since 1993: glacial, guitar-derived drone — seamlessly serene, if sometimes surprisingly heavy — that’s quietly potent enough to retard the passage of time. —K. Ross Hoffman

Now that Tritone’s officially given up the ghost, all we’ve got is The Tritone Sessions (tritone-sessions.bandcamp. com), a free “warts-and-all” comp recorded right off the board by the venue’s steadfast sound guy, Scott Parker. Many scenes called Tritone home (Sugar Town, Bobby Zankel), but this CD sets a distinctly punky/boozy/bluesy vibe with loud jams by The Tough Shits, Blessed Muthas, Stinking Lizaveta, Mr. Unloved and a ton more. And then there are the lush curveballs: the ramblin’ Appalachia of Schuylkill River Outlaws, the funked-up Wurlitzer of The GTVs. A fine and fitting tribute. —Patrick Rapa

³ rock/pop Sleigh Bells’ second album couldn’t hope to repeat the sheer

shock-and-awe of their debut. On Reign of Terror (Mom + Pop), the Brooklyn duo compensates by simultaneously ramping up the hardness and softness of their blunt-force, max-impact pop: Both Derek Miller’s punishing metal/industrial storm and Alexis Krauss’ sugary coo are noticeably intensified here. But the real coup is the songs themselves, a toothier, more complex batch that suggests these —K. Ross Hoffman guys may have more surprises in store.

flickpick

³ comedy

HOBO MAESTRO His interest in microtonality led him to build his own instruments. ³ AMERICAN MINIMALISM IS often called

If you agree with everything Doug Stanhope says, you have no place in polite society. In fact, the FBI is probably keeping tabs on everybody who bellows an approving “woo” on the foulmouthed, scratchy-voiced standup’s Before Turning the Gun on Himself (Roadrunner). Pretty much every time he brings up race or sex or drugs or tsunami victims is a test of your moral center. Will you just nervous-laugh, like a normal person, or will you start collecting guns, hosting meetings and plotting to kill Dr. Drew or bring down Alcoholics Anonymous? —Patrick Rapa

[ movie review ]

SALMON FISHING IN THE YEMEN

the catalyst that broke the stranglehold of atonality on the world of art music. It’s a valid claim, but the work of such well-known players as Glass, Reich and Riley has an important precedent in the music of an earlier group of West Coast mavericks, including Lou Harrison, Henry Cowell and John Cage. One of the most remarkable members of this generation was Harry Partch,the man who looked for the music between the black and white keys of the piano. Most of his music is written using a 43-tone scale, resulting in exotic and lushly beautiful harmonies and textures. His interest in microtonality led him to build his own instruments — spectacular, one-ofa-kind works of craft, which still exist at his foundation in Montclair, N.J.Thankfully, they are still played, although they rarely travel. Fortunate Philadelphians may recall the mesmerizing production of Partch’s masterpiece, Revelation in the Courthouse Park, by the American Music Theater in 1987. Partch’s story as an artistic outsider is an amazing and uniquely American tale. By the time of his death in 1974 at the age of 73 he was reasonably wellknown and supported, although it would have been a stretch to have called him famous. His formative artistic years were during the Great Depression, when he led a hobo life, getting around by hopping trains. He was constantly jotting down music, including the patterns of spoken word, an interesting precursor to the recent works of Steve Reich. He kept a diary of those times, which he called Bitter Music. Bridge Records has just released a three-CD set of readings and music from Bitter Music,along with an excellent set of program notes, with many pages of Partch’s folksy sketches. In yet another example of Partch’s prescient artistry, the words and rhythms bear a remarkable resemblance to a later, more famous road story by a fellow named Jack Kerouac. The Bridge release is a fine introduction to Partch, but there’s also music to hear, mainly on the terrific new label Innova. Tomato Records has the complete Philadelphia performance of Revelation in the Courthouse Park. And if you ever have the opportunity to hear the Partch instruments live, run, do not walk, to get a ticket. Your musical imagination will never be the same. (p_burwasser@citypaper.net)

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[ C+ ] LASSE HALLSTRÖM IS a true believer. The Swedish director crafts love stories for those who like their romances bathed in lakeside sunset glow and unsullied by complications. He even does it when adapting Paul Torday’s satirical novel Salmon Fishing in the Yemen, which folds in terrorism, the clash of values between East and West, major engineering projects and high-level political maneuvering. Confining the political barbs wholly to scenes involving Kristin Scott Thomas, Hallström reclines and basks in the inevitability of the sparks struck between Ewan McGregor’s buttoned-up fisheries scientist and Emily Blunt’s flighty, ill-defined assistant to a Yemeni sheik. McGregor’s Dr. Alfred Jones is enlisted against his will to aid the Anglophile sheik’s attempts to import the sport of salmon fishing to his desert home country, despite the scientific implausibility and the local population’s distrust. Blunt is his point of contact, the elaboratelynamed Harriet Chetwode-Talbot. The whole operation is insisted upon by the prime minister’s press secretary, desperate for some good news out of the war-embroiled Middle East. Both McGregor and Blunt are in relationships, but his cold, shrewish straw wife and her MIA soldier boy are characters designed solely to be discarded in the name of fated passion. A longstanding marriage, concerns about undertaking modernization efforts in the face of residents’ resentment, a brave soldier’s inconvenient insistence on not being dead: All are shrugged off in favor of two attractive, eccentrically matched characters who really kinda like each other. “Faith and fish,” intones the mystically minded sheik to encourage his uphill endeavor, a mantra to which Hallström vigorously subscribes. Unfortunately, almost every issue surrounding the bland central couple-to-be would make for a more interesting story. But even when violence threatens at the climax, the director rushes through the spectacle to reconcile his lovers. —Shaun Brady

Discarded in the name of passion.

CHINO EVIL: Director Lasse Hallström rushes through his film’s weightier issues to bask in the love story between Ewan McGregor and Emily Blunt’s characters.

suitespot Peter Burwasser on classical

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[ arts & entertainment ]

Under the covers with Justin Bauer

TWIN CITIES

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shelflife

(Greywolf, March 13) is a gauntlet to sentence-diagramming middle-school teachers everywhere. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Dom would be happy to talk about the old Bohane until the clock came down the stairs,â&#x20AC;? we are told, late in the novel, â&#x20AC;&#x153;and there on the hardback chair he rocked to and fro, rhythmically, as he made notes from the Gantâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s powerful recall, and the hunchback Grimes, too, was set adrift on memory bliss â&#x20AC;&#x201D; ah youth; heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d been a puckish spirit in his youth, Balt Grimes; the hump hadnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t kept him from his share of tushies (your Bohane tush anyways tending to incline towards a bit of strange) â&#x20AC;&#x201D; and the three men cut across each other, and prompted each other, and riffed; when a reminiscence got going in the Back Trace, nights, it worked like a freestyle morphine jazz.â&#x20AC;? Comprehensive, rhythmic and smothering: This is the standard register for Barryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s novel. Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not necessarily bad, but a tolerance for (or enjoyment of) this kind of elevated tone is required. A constant barrage of language describes buildings and clothes, old rivalries, landscapes; everything comes in an onrush of the same intent, half-invented slang. The effect is a particular sort of insularity: Bohane seems isolated from the rest of Ireland and from the outside world. The bookâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s setting in the near future adds to this isolation, and allows Barry to assemble a fictional cityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s argot out of whole cloth. For all that, City of Bohane is not at all fantastic; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s recognizable, realistic and sepia-toned. It adopts boozy reminiscence as its standard voice, and the minimal events of the plot (an abortive love triangle; a suspense-free gang war) are overwhelmed by asides, qualifications and descriptions. City of Bohane ends up being about little besides the town itself â&#x20AC;&#x201D; a description rather than a story, or a drawn-out barstool yarn without a punch line. The London of Nick Harkawayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Angelmaker (Knopf, March 20), on the other hand, is a real, contemporary city. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s only the stuff that goes on underground that violates the rules of normalcy. Harkawayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hero, Joe Spork, is the scion of a criminal underworld (centered on the Night Market, a sort of Oliver Twist bazaar of stolen goods and off-the-books services) who has turned his back on his inheritance in favor of the straight and narrow, repairing clockwork as his grandfa-

ther did. And while itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no surprise that Spork gets sucked back into Londonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s underground, the sheer breadth of invention Harkaway throws at the poor fellow still impresses. Angelmakerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s London stretches from the wet-suited scavengers picking through forgotten sewers to a Laurel-andHardy odd couple of shadowy government agents, to the sort of multigenerational globe-trotting conspiracy that requires a suspension of disbelief. Harkawayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s preciousness can occasionally get overwhelming, like when he introduces the MacGuffin that sets the plot in motion. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I have taken to referring to this object as the whojimmy,â&#x20AC;? Spork is told. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It resembles no tool the like of which I have ever seen ... The whojimmy is apparently necessary to gain access

A tolerance for this kind of tone is required. to certain of the moving parts of the doodah.â&#x20AC;? Later, when the full implications of the doodah become clear, another character asks (in concert with the reader), â&#x20AC;&#x153;Who creates a superweapon or a superwhatever-it-is and makes it so bloody whimsical?â&#x20AC;? In fitting all of this stuff into a single volume, even one of Angelmakerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s size, Harkaway winds up with a baggy, ungainly thing, as full of digressions as the less-frenetic City of Bohane.The lighthearted hijinks and silly names wind up next to serious concerns â&#x20AC;&#x201D; torture and terrorism, paranoia and the police state â&#x20AC;&#x201D; delivered with a light touch and endearing earnestness. The encyclopedic scope and magpie energy courts comparison with Thomas Pynchon or Neal Stephenson. But despite the Monty Python-style business, its political consciousness makes Angelmaker more than a series of winsome punch lines. (j_bauer@citypaper.net)

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curtaincall Mark Cofta on theater

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[ arts & entertainment ]

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³ ANTI-AUTHORITY Knowing the inevitable doesn’t negate the suspense in Quintessence Theatre Group’s superb staging of Jean Anouilh’s Antigone.A martini-swirling commentator (John Williams) shares at the start that Oedipus’ titular daughter “plays a part she has to play” when she opposes King Creon’s decision to let her traitorous brother’s corpse rot without proper burial. Later, Creon admits the same about himself when he orders Antigone’s execution. It’s an old, old story, first told by Sophocles 2,400 years ago; the wartime concerns of Anouilh’s take, drafted in 1943 France, remain in Jeremy Sams’ translation. Though the plot is either several decades or a couple of millennia old, it’s easy to draw numerous modern parallels with the themes of resistance to authority. The play’s talk-heavy, mainly in intense two-person scenes. Tension builds in artistic director Alexander Burns’ production through our connections with the clearly drawn, smartly played characters: Lavita Shaurice’s adherence to her convictions as Antigone; Robert Jason Jackson’s pragmatic Creon, willing to bend rules to avoid a showdown; and the affection and dismay of Antigone’s nurse (Cheryl Williams) and fiancé (and Creon’s son) Haemon (Khris Davis). Even the seemingly petty concerns of the bodyguards become real factors in Antigone’s clash with authority. As in Quintessence’s exciting repertory of The Merchant of Venice and The Venetian Twins last fall, Burns employs a large, bare stage, modern-dress costuming by Jane Casanave and Mike Billings’ sharp, spare lighting to focus our attention on his cast’s genuine performances and the play’s larger themes. Antigone is drama sans dressing: a brave approach that asks much of both actors and audience and allows neither to hide. Through March 25, $30, Sedgwick Theater, 7137 Germantown Ave., 215-2406055, quintessencetheatre.org. (m_cofta@citypaper.net)

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[ arts & entertainment ]

[ hip-hop & you workshop ]

LEADERS OF THE NEW SCHOOL Blackboard Labs puts Philly high-school kids in front of the mic and behind the soundboard. By Francesca Crozier-Fitzgerald

n the third floor the Wolf Building at 12th and Callowhill streets, three high-school students from Blackboard Labs Inc. (BBL) push open a large, soundproof door. They file into a dim, bohemian recording studio, followed by teacher and director Jim Wells. There are traditional African decorations along the walls. Bongos, keyboards, guitars and amplifiers are scattered around. Electrical wires and extension cords are webbed along the carpet. The microphones in the center face the window on the far wall that divides the studio and the control room. While the building’s various studios are home to many local artists, on this Monday evening this room, Lorelei Studio, is reserved free of charge for BBL students: a private space where the kids are encouraged and expected to voice their opinions through lyrics and song. “As much as possible, this is a project that is completely theirs,” says Wells. “Honestly, it’s just a chance for kids to come hang out and talk about the things that are on their minds. Then they turn that into music and something they can share with their friends and family.” Created in August 2010 by Wells, Allison Dean and Paul Dunnaville, BBL is a local nonprofit aimed at providing an upbeat and creative outlet for Philadelphia’s high-school students. Their backgrounds — the instructors are trained in education, art therapy and communications, respectively — provide a healthy foundation for the project. Since conception, BBL has grown by word of mouth and communication with high-school music directors. Currently, the students hail from city high schools like Lankenau, Murrell Dobbins, Arise Academy and the Shipley School. Lorelei, once used by G. Love, has been a home base for BBL since the summer. In their weekly routine, the students tweak the writing process, invent new rhythms, learn some hip-hop history and gain confidence in recording and editing. They’re making progress: This past July, BBL released their first full-length hiphop album, The Debut, and they’re mixing tracks for a follow-up. In November, the crew wrote, remixed and edited a piece for DJ Shadow’s annual remix contest, which they titled “Not a Perfect Love Song.” The kids opted to base their remix on their own personal, often painful, tales of heartbreak. The students of Blackboard Labs practice using their life experiences as ammo for the creative spirit they bring with them into the recording booth. Free to choose their subject matter, the students sing about the issues they encounter each day of their young lives — relationships and heartache, friendships and fights, their frustrations, passions and dreams. Lamont Skinner, a high-school junior, has been in the program from the beginning. He started working with Wells at a defunct after-school program similar to BBL and fell in love with it. “Mr. Jim and Ms. Allie are not like some teachers. They are our mentors and our friends,” he says. “I tell my friends about Blackboard Labs and tell them to come, because the more, the merrier. If they don’t come, it’s on them,” says Skinner. As the students have gotten accustomed to one another’s writing and singing styles, peer editing has crept into the routine. One student stands in the recording booth as the others listen with Wells in the control room, discussing how their friend could make the verse more dynamic, less breathy or more crisp. One rainy November evening, the group was cooped up in the studio finishing the final recording session for the DJ Shadow contest. Kayla Tindal was in the booth recording the refrain, and Wells started to explain how she could spice it up. Without a word, Skinner went into the studio. His words carried through the microphone:

BOARD MEETING: Instructor Jim Wells helps Blackboard Labs students make music and learn the ropes at Lorelei Studio. FRANCESCA CROZIER-FITZGERALD

“You can do this, Kayla, but you gotta stop playing games. Treat this second line like you did that one, and sing it like you mean it. This can be great.” After he walked back into the control room, Wells counted her back into the refrain, and she nailed it. “This is my favorite part about this group,” Wells said. “I watch them interact with one another and care enough to help one another improve.” Like other extracurricular activities, enrollment is voluntary and attendance fluctuates from week to week. The core group, while small, benefits from its dedication with personalized critiques and editing assistance. With Dean on maternity leave at the time of this interview, the small group is more manageable for Wells anyway. While he hopes the program continues growing in numbers, he says he “would much rather provide a quality program to five students than a mediocre one to 20.” High-school sophomore Kourtnei Rivers says BBL’s intimate setting helps the students make the most of each class. “Mr. Jim is super cool to go to with a problem, and we all just fall in love with that so we keep coming back,” she says. “We know there’s a time to play around and a time to get serious.” Getting serious at BBL, however, is hardly a chore. (One student, Deven Ginyard, made a deal with his mother: He can keep going as long as he keeps his grades up.) In an age of instant gratification, Blackboard Labs is structured so that students are able to see their product immediately. They focus, write, record and listen. If nothing else, it’s an incentive to stop texting for a few hours. But, thankfully, it is more than that. For Wells, the greatest achievement of the project is in personal growth. “I’ve watched the students’ behavior really evolve over time. The kids that were shy and timid at first have become much more vocal and more expressive. They are coming into their own and have learned this through music.” (editorial@citypaper.net)

“There’s a time to play and a time to get serious.”

✚ For more info, visit blackboardlabs.org.

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FILMS ARE GRADED BY CITY PAPER CRITICS A-F.

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WINNER

BEST ACTRESS TILDA SWINTON

NATIONAL BOARD OF REVIEW s EUROPEAN FILM AWARDS SAN FRANCISCO FILM CRITICS s HOUSTON FILM CRITICS ONLINE FILM CRITICS SOCIETY s AUSTIN FILM CRITICS ASSN.

We Need to Talk About Kevin

MESMERIZING.”

“ NEW THE FORGIVENESS OF BLOOD|B-

FRIENDS WITH KIDS|B+

“A

BRAVURA PIECE OF FILMMAKING.”

+ + + + +”

“

Read Drew Lazor’s review on citypaper.net/movies (Pearl, Roxy, UA 69th Street, UA Grant, UA Riverview)

LAST DAYS HERE A haiku: Pentagram’s story is just like Anvil’s, except they’re high and in jail. (Not reviewed) (Ritz at the Bourse)

FILM CRITIC’S PICK

TILDA SWINTON

JOHN C. REILLY

EZRA MILLER

SILENT HOUSE|C Shaking up contemporary faux-doc stylistics and time-honored B-movie tropes in a negligibly balanced cocktail, this noodly thriller from Chris Kentis and Laura Lau (Open Water) does an incredible job of layering tension, but becomes knotty and inelegant during the moments that matter most. A remake of a 2010 Uruguayan low-budget shocker, Silent House follows Sarah (Elizabeth Olsen) in strict real

A film by

LYNNE RAMSAY

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RITZ AT THE BOURSE

RITZ CENTER 16

In Jennifer Westfeldt’s directorial debut, she and friend Adam Scott heed the ticking of their biological clocks and decide to have a baby, but not the relationship that comes with it. Some of their friends (Jon Hamm and Kristen Wiig) are unhappily coupled, others (Maya Rudolph and Chris

JOHN CARTER

BRILLIANTLY MADE.”

“

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Globetrotting director Joshua Marston (Maria Full of Grace) touches down in Albania for his second feature, where the centuries-old Kanun dictates the terms of a feud between two families. The conflict centers on the right of passage over land owned once by the family of teenage Nik (Tristan Halilaj) and now by the spiteful Sokol (Veton Osmani), who blocks the path habitually traveled by Nik’s family’s bread cart. Given the speed with which a disputed easement leads to bloodshed, there must be a history between the two families, but it’s obscured or simply forgotten, a vestigial animosity whose present-day consequences are all too tangible. Marston and co-screenwriter Andamion Murataj keep the pivotal confrontation offscreen, but the upshot is that Sokol is stabbed to death, Nik’s uncle jailed, and his father disappears, leaving the matter of traditional justice dangerously unsettled. Although he’s safe inside, Nik risks being killed if he leaves the house, so his sister takes over the family bread business, itself an anachronism as her horse-drawn cart is outpaced by a competitor’s new car. The film falls back on presenting an unfamiliar reality rather than exploring it in depth, which gives the story a certain flatness; there’s a passive quality to Marston’s approach, which confuses empathy with a lack of assertiveness. It’s fitfully fascinating but incomplete. —Sam Adams (Ritz at the Bourse)

O’Dowd) have thrown themselves into parenting wholehog, but none of them are as they were, which, from where the expecting couple sit, is a fate worse than (spiritual) death. “We don’t know those people,” Scott muses. “Those people are mean and angry.” Westfeldt, who wrote and starred in Kissing Jessica Stein, works several balancing acts at once, mixing a sitcom premise with emotionally fraught realizations and adding depth, but not too much, to the burgeoning cinema of arrested development. She sympathizes with her characters’ unwillingness to surrender their carefully wrought selves at the same time as she lays bare their narcissism. Their post-co-parenting arcs, with Westfeldt feeling the pull of maternal instinct and Scott getting busy with Megan Fox, are a hair too chromosomally determined, but the movie’s killer last line makes the most of its biological imperatives. —S.A. (Ritz Five)

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time as she arrives with father John (Adam Trese) and uncle Peter (Eric Sheffer Stevens) at a lakeside vacation home the family hopes to renovate and sell. The camera, which hovers above shoulders like a helium balloon knotted to each characters’ belt loops, sticks uncomfortably close as unseen forces trap and terrorize the threesome in their creaky electricity-free mansion, playing with a nearly videogame-like third-person perspective that’s powerful. But Kentis and Lau fail to capitalize on the potential bred by their build-and-release, speeding up shots when they’d be creepier slow, and rarely riding out scares to

completion. Olsen, grinding home the spooked-doe demeanor that made Martha Marcy May Marlene, does damage, but her supporting cast can’t compete. The heavy taboo subtext present throughout the movie ends up being the most unsettling element of all. —Drew Lazor (Pearl, UA 69th Street, UA Grant, UA Riverview)

SALMON FISHING IN THE YEMEN|C+ Read Shaun Brady’s review on pg. 23. (Ritz East)

A THOUSAND WORDS A haiku: Whenever Eddie Murphy speaks he gets closer

to death. In this film. (Not reviewed) (Pearl, UA 69th Street, UA Grant, UA Riverview)

WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT KEVIN|AEarly in Lynne Ramsey’s new movie, the camera makes its way through a blond-wood-and-white-applianced kitchen to find a small girl eating multicolored cereal at the counter. As the camera hovers over her, not a little ominously, she turns around and you see that she’s wearing an eye patch. There’s no good reason that can be, and so, when the scene cuts suddenly to Eva (Tilda Swinton) dunking her face into water, you glean that the connection

between them will be trouble. Indeed. Eva is little Celia’s (Ashley Gerasimovich) mother, who you learn soon enough feels guilty about her eye. This is because Eva’s other child is Kevin (Ezra Miller), who becomes a school shooter. As horrific and sensational as this story is, the film, much like the novel that inspired it, is less horrific or sensational than it is disturbing for its relentless focus through Eva’s eyes. Repeatedly, she struggles to accommodate her dim husband Franklin (John C. Reilly) and understand why her son is difficult, and we repeatedly watch her watching him. Because the film offers no outside, no view of Kevin that is not hers, it’s never

[ movie shorts ]

clear how his increasingly frightening behaviors evolve. This isn’t to say the film blames her, or even blames Kevin, for his monstrosity. The film offers no easy read, no way to separate yourself from the pain and rage that bind mother and son. And so it grants no moral ground, no way to judge how this plot turns so terrible, even though you know it will from the first moments. —Cindy Fuchs (Ritz at the Bourse)

ISRAELI FILM FESTIVAL TORN|B

“THE FIRST BLOCKBUSTER OF THE YEAR.”

Ronit Kertsner’s Torn follows Polish priest Romuald Waszkinel as he grapples with an identity crisis after discovering he was born Jewish and

Dean Richards, WGN-TV/CHICAGO

“VISUALLY STUNNING.” Kevin Steincross, FOX-TV/ST. LOUIS

PURE MAGIC.

“

”

“A HILARIOUS HIT.

A witty, textured, modern look at love, adult friendships, and the new permutations on the traditional family.”

Harry Knowles, AIN’T IT COOL NEWS

JESSICA HENDERSON,

“A rapid-ﬁre crowd-pleaser.” LOGAN HILL,

“Laughs in all the right places.” M A R C H 8 - M A R C H 1 4 , 2 0 1 2 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T

KRISTA SMITH,

“Great, funny and touching.” MICHELLE KUNG,

32 | P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R |

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✚ ALSO PLAYING ACT OF VALOR | BUA Grant, UA Riverview

PROJECT X | BPearl, Roxy, UA Riverview

For full movie reviews and showtimes, go to citypaper.net/movies

✚ REPERTORY FILM ANDREW’S VIDEO VAULT The Rotunda, 4014 Walnut St., armcinema25.com. Claudia Weill’s Girlfriends (1977, U.S., 86 min.), a Kubrick favorite that focuses on a female photographer trying to make it on her own, opens this double feature. Razzie-nominated thriller Windows (1980, U.S., 96 min.) closes. Thu., March 8, 8 p.m., free.

THE BALCONY

BRYN MAWR FILM INSTITUTE 824 W. Lancaster Ave., Bryn Mawr, 610-527-9898, brynmawrfilm.org. Looney Tunes Shorts: With Wile E. Coyote and Taz in hot pursuit, you’d think Bugs Bunny would consider buying a Florida condo in this set of ’toons. Sat., March 10, 11 a.m., $5. Five Friends (2010, U.S., 70 min.): Apatow, take note: This doc explores what mature bromances look like. Wed., March 14, 7:30 p.m., $10.

CHESTNUT HILL FILM GROUP Free Library, Chestnut Hill Branch, 8711 Germantown Ave., 215-248-0977, armcinema25.com. On the Beach (1959, U.S., 134 min.): Gregory Peck, Fred Astaire, Ava Gardner and An-

NOMAD PIZZA 611 S. 7th St., 215-238-0900, nomadpizzaco.com. Pulp Fiction (1994, U.S., 154 min.): “I wanna dance. I wanna win. I want that trophy, so dance good.” Sun., March 11, 8 p.m., free.

UNKNOWN JAPAN The Bellevue, 200 S. Broad St., seventh floor, unknown-japan.com. This Japanfocused film series ends with a double bill of Shunji Iwai’s Undo (1994, Japan, 47 min.) and Shinsuke Sato’s The Time of Death (2011, Japan, 47 min.), two thrillers that focus on the end of relationships. Wed., March 14, 7 p.m., free.

WOODEN SHOE BOOKS 508 S. Fifth St., 215-413-0999, woodenshoebooks.com. Rise of the Planet of the Apes (2011, U.S., 105 min.): Turns out animal abuse has disastrous consequences. Who’d have thought? Sun., March 11, 7 p.m., free.

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[ the agenda ]

the agenda

â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Meg Augustin

harmonyâ&#x20AC;? than â&#x20AC;&#x153;band,â&#x20AC;? though the harmonies would be better classified as â&#x20AC;&#x153;Bikini Kill does droneâ&#x20AC;? than â&#x20AC;&#x153;Supremes.â&#x20AC;? When Disband played around the Lower East Side from 1978 to 1982, they called themselves an â&#x20AC;&#x153;all-girl conceptual artpunk band of women artists who canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t play any instruments.â&#x20AC;? The group was heavy into the legendarily productive post-punk downtown New

the naked city | feature | a&e

a Philly African-American film promoter, will present a special screening of Tigre Hillâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s The Barrel of a Gun â&#x20AC;&#x201D; a doc examining the murder, police case and controversy. The film comes at a fitting time: Two months ago, Abu-Jamal was removed from death row to serve a life sentence without parole. Annette John-Hall of the Inquirer will moderate a post-film discussion with Hill, attorney Michael Coard and local NAACP chapter president J. Whyatt Mondesire.

A/BC@2/G !

MIKEY JUNIOR & THE STONE COLD BLUES FEATURING DEAN SHOT

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3.14 [ art / music ]

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foodanddrink

portioncontrol By Drew Lazor

CHUCK WAGON ³ CHANCES ARE THE date March 9 doesn’t hold broad significance to you. That’s why Harry Baker wants you to take off work and come marathondrinking with him to commemorate the passing of one of America’s most treasured alcoholics. Eighteen years ago tomorrow, Charles Bukowski succumbed to cancer after decades of rakish existence, during which the Angeleno writer cranked out countless stanzas, chapters and paragraphs. Most all of those words were spurred into a gallop by Bukowski’s meticulously documented drinking, as vital a part of the writer’s mythology as any turn of phrase. “He wrote his own legend,” says Baker, a poet, rugby player and former bartender. To commemorate Buk’s passing, Baker, who now makes his rent working for SEPTA, has organized a series of events at bars throughout the city. His plan capitalizes on the strength-in-numbers strategies of the Occupy movement with an honest purpose: getting loaded, the most populist of all playinghooky persuasions. “Drinking is an emotional thing,” Bukowski once said. “It joggles you out of the standardism of everyday life.” Turn words into action at 10 a.m. tomorrow at Con Murphy’s (1700 Ben Franklin Parkway) for an Occupy-style planning meeting accompanied by eggs, Irish coffees and poetry. The bar will distribute event T-shirts featuring Buk sharing a table with a number of his intoxicated brothers in arms (Hemingway, Poe, Burroughs), with sales benefitting Rock Ministries. From here it’s choose-your-own-soused-adventure — at noon, the Piazza’s Gunners Run will screen Barfly,with a second, interactive showing at 8 p.m. (“Like Rocky Horror for alcoholics!”). Also starting at noon, O’Neal’s (611 S. Third St.) will pour half-price beers for anyone who recites Buk work.Around 4:30 p.m., Fergie’s (1214 Sansom St.) will see readings from Ham on Rye and the eating of ham on rye sandwiches. South Philly’s Shamrock (1400 S. Second St.) welcomes revelers all night, while Gunners Run is set to host the Charles Bukowski Blues Project, with Frank Petersun reciting Bukowski work backed by a five-piece band, at 10 p.m. Baker hopes participants will don his shirts and descend on these bars and others, Occupy-style, to encourage impromptu discounts. Though he’s the architect of this quasi-controlled madness, he’s adamant about the focus staying on Chuck. “It ain’t about me,” says Baker. “It’s about a great man’s words.” (drew.lazor@citypaper.net) ✚ For more info, visit occupybarstools.blogspot.com.

’CHOKE ARTISTS: Chefs Daniela D’Ambrosio and Todd Braley are capable of cranking out some beautiful dishes, like lentil/sunchoke ravioli in Meyer lemon broth. NEAL SANTOS

[ review ]

HALF PICKLED The cooking at Fishtown’s beautiful new BYOB needs to straighten up and fly right. By Adam Erace

THE PICKLED HERON| 2218 Frankford Ave., 215-634-5666, thepick-

ledheron.com. Dinner served Tue.-Thu., 5-10 p.m.; Fri.-Sat., 5-11 p.m.; all-day brunch Sunday, 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; closed Mon. Appetizers, $7-$18; entrées, $15-$25; dessert, $6. BYOB. Cash only.

irst jobs can be rough. First jobs in the restaurant industry, even rougher. For a 16-year-old Daniela D’Ambrosio, that meant slinging French toast for screaming tykes at the character brunch at the Radisson near Sesame Place, the first restaurant to employ the Buxco native. “There was syrup everywhere,” she remembers. More on: Fourteen years later, D’Ambrosio is still working Sunday brunch, but instead of Elmo pancakes, she’s doing eggs Benedict on housemade English muffins, and instead of a strip-mall hotel, she’s at Pickled Heron, the France-by-way-of-Fishtown BYOB she opened with cochef Todd Braley in December. Sunday brunch is an all-day affair, 11 a.m. till 9 p.m., with a menu of morning and evening recipes that changes every week. To bake the bread — it’s made in-house, as is the butter — D’Ambrosio and Braley get in extra-early on Sundays, sometimes only a few hours after closing out Saturday-night service.

citypaper.net

I admire that kind of commitment, even more than I admire the ability to serve breakfast to several hundred Snuffleupagus groupies. D’Ambrosio and Braley, who met while working together at the Ritz-Carlton, are the epitome of the young, DIY chef/owners who infuse our dining landscape with vitality, grit and spunk. Except for the exhaust hood and the plumbing, they did the work for Pickled Heron themselves, transforming a Frankford Avenue walk-up into a warm salon with persimmon walls, tiled mosaics and an open kitchen. So what if it took three years? D’Ambrosio and Braley have Fishtown’s best-looking restaurant to show for it. Vintage details decorate the 50-seat dining room. The long white chestnut church pew running along one side is more than 100 years old. Discovered in D’Ambrosio’s grandmom’s basement and lovingly rewired, a 1942 compressor-top fridge hums by the service station. A globe light arcs over a two-top set at a cozy antique loveseat, a perch tailor-made for wedding proposals. Just don’t order the charcuterie plate on the same visit; you’ll be MORE FOOD AND too engrossed in the breaded puck of head DRINK COVERAGE cheese to remember the ring. AT C I T Y P A P E R . N E T / From bread and pastry to pasta and M E A LT I C K E T. charcuterie, D’Ambrosio and Braley are cooks-of-all-trades at Pickled Heron, though they’re not without their specialties. Braley, who’s worked at Bliss and the old Copper in Northern Liberties, has been guiding the charcuterie, producing silky duck liver-and-foie mousse and duck pâté scented with quatre épices, a classic French blend of ginger, cloves, nutmeg and pepper. Both accompanied the head cheese on that charcuterie plate, and while the selection changes almost daily, I’d be elated to meet >>> continued on adjacent page

gracetavern.com

South Philadelphiaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s

PREMIER ITALIAN BYOB

Open 7 Days a Week Restaurant and Banquet Room

Where are you having your next event? Have it with us! We specialize in all types of events: Communions, Conformations, Graduations, Rehearsal Dinners, Baby / Bridal Showers Our Elegant Second Floor Dining Room Seats up to 100 guests FOR MORE INFORMATION GO TO OUR WEBSITE WWW.CAFFEVALENTINO.COM 215-336-3033

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the agenda | a&e | feature | the naked city

[ the week in eats ]

â&#x153;&#x161; WHATâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S COOKING 2301 FAIRMOUNT AVE PHILADELPHIA

215.978.4545 LONDONGRILL.COM

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food

[ food & drink ]

Vivo Chocolate and Buffalo Trace Pop-Up at 1 Shot Coffee Sat. March 10, 7-9 p.m. Âł Melissa Baruno of 1 Shot Coffee has teamed up with Juliet Burgh and Sam DeLuca of Vivo Chocolate Co. and Buffalo Trace bourbon for a pop-up bar celebrating the launch of Vivo. The event will feature free whiskey samples plus Vivoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s chocolates. Burgh will be on hand to discuss the health benefits of raw chocolate, a solid source of vitamins, minerals and antioxidants. 1 Shot Coffee, 217 W. George St., 215-627-1620, 1shotcoffee.com. Fourth Annual Stout Brunch at Johnny Brendaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s

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[ IN WITH THE NEW ]

5@33< 033@ 5@33< 1633@ =C@ # <2 G3/@ 1SZSP`ObS Ab >Ob`WQYĂ&#x201A;a 2Og Ob ;Q5WZZW\Ă&#x201A;a >VWZORSZ^VWOĂ&#x201A;a =ZRSab O\R ;]ab /cbVS\bWQ 7`WaV >cP ;O`QV % Ab >Ob`WQYĂ&#x201A;a 2Og 2]]`a =^S\ Ob /;

Sat., March 10, 11 a.m.-3:30 p.m., pay as you go Âł Spend your Saturday sipping dark beers for brunch with the folks at Johnny Brendaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s. Dogfish Head, Yards, Weyerbacher and Sly Fox are but a few of the breweries contributing stouts. The kitchen will be serving specials like oysters, gravlax, pickled herring, an Irish breakfast with housemade Irish bacon and boudin blanc and oatmeal stout cookies. The regular brunch menu will be available during the event, too. Johnny Brendaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, 1201 N. Frankford Ave., 215-739-9684, johnnybrendas.com. Eighth Annual Brewerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Plate Sun., March 11, 6-9 p.m., $75-$125 Âł This yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Brewerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Plate, hosted by Fair Food, will take place at the National Constitution Center. Restaurant participants, including Khyber Pass Pub, Fork, Stateside, Frankford Hall, Kennett and White Dog, will match up with beer producers to create food and drink pairings. VIP tickets allow guests to attend â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Farmer and the Artisan,â&#x20AC;? an interactive experience exploring craft food production. All proceeds go to Fair Food to support sustainable agriculture in the Philadelphia area. National Constitution Center, 525 Arch St., 215-386-5211, fairfoodphilly.org. Slow Food Philadelphia Flour Seminar Wed.,

March 14, 7-9 p.m., $20 Âł Roberta Strickler of Daisy Flour and Andrew Gerson of Strada Pasta are hosting the next Slow Food seminar. Strickler owns a certified organic flour mill in Annville, Pa., and will explain how her products are made. Gerson will demonstrate how to whip up Daisy-derived pasta from scratch. There will be complimentary wine along with food. The Restaurant School at Walnut Hill College, 4100 Walnut St., slowfoodphilly.org. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Alexandra Weiss

BACK TO WORK

DUMB ASS LADY How dumb are you? Why would you put your umbrella on the ground infront of the door of the building of where I work at and then talk on your cell phone. You dumb bitch, just because there is a covering there to standing under when it is raining doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t mean you can stand there and talk while your umbrella is blocking the doorway. and people cant come in..next time I see your dumb ass and you do this same shit again. I am not going to get up and ask you to move I am just going to call the cops and let them deal with you stupid ass.

RETARD BUS DRIVER You know the bus driver is retarded when he is driving slow as hell and the bus behind you passes you. And it has nobody on it and it crusing really fast...making you miss you train when you get to your other destination. Note to bus driver if you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t learn how to drive fast in the

the answer? Foreign women? Celibacy? Or accept the fact that you will be alone forever!

RING COUNT Your fucking phone makes me sick...you know the shit is stuck on fucking 40 rings before someone picks up the phone! What kind of shit is that...it doesn;t make any sense...why would you call me and when I call you back you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t answer the fucking phone! I hate that shit...if you really need to talk to me...send me a fucking email or something....other than that...I will not be calling you anytime soon or thereafter!

WHY ARE YOU PLAYING I hate the fact that when you ask me something I am there for you...when you need something I am there for you...but when the shoe is on the other foot...it is bullshit how I am trying to get with you and then I get shut the fuck down...I am tired of the whole fucking thing! Who do you think that you are? I am tired of it...you said to me before how you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t deserve me...I finally agree with you...you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t deserve me! Sometimes I wish that I never met you...PS: Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t call me when you are in trouble!

FUCK LOVE SOMETIMES I think it is a bunch of bullshit how some people say that they love you and do the dumb shit that they do. I think that it is bullshit that I lived so long and I canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t find the person that I am looking for to be with for so long. Why are so many people so lucky to find the person they want... why canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t everyone find who they need. I think the whole thing is bullshit sometimes...If you love someone...tell them...if you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t why fucking lie and say that you do and you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t. People karma is a mother fucker!

WORDS YOU SAY

I LOVE YOU I love when your blue eyes match the sky on a perfect dayâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;â&#x20AC;&#x201D;i love you when you call me vindictive-and -I love you while you wait for change to appear in your hand like some sort of zen priestâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;â&#x20AC;&#x201D;I love you while you complain and shoo me awayâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;ooo and of course-i love how you can just call a couch full of people a â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;dismal swampâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;â&#x20AC;&#x201D;â&#x20AC;&#x201D;I just love how the snow swirls around the sidewalk when you arent thereâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;â&#x20AC;&#x201D; and yeahâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;I love the diamonds and the jewels and the earringsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and the gold necklacesâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;â&#x20AC;&#x201D;and although I love seeing you at the end of the day sitting in a chair reading a newspaper â&#x20AC;&#x201D; I wish things were so much different.

ORANGE ISNâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;T MY COLOR!

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N N N : I < G < I @ < 9 < 8 L D F E ; < : F D

morning you can kiss your job as a bus driver bye-bye asshole.

SOME WOMEN SUCK! What the fuck is with women today? They bitch and moan about the lack of quality men for relationships, but the majority of them are attracted to the asshole bad boy loser types! I am an attractive Harvard educated surgeon who cannot find any female marriage material. I have treated women well and with respect and what do I get in return? Contempt! Letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s be friends! As soon as the asshole bad boy enters the picture I am toast! Women tell me they like the challenge of trying to change the loser types, but those relationships always end in disaster 99% of the time. So what is

STOP CALLING You know that you are a piece of shit...and you know that I know that...I look at you and I want to slap the shit out of you so fucking hard in your face it doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t make any sense...I hate you so much...I just want you to go away and not contact me anymore....canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t you see that it is over...it been over and now you are just pursuing something that just isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t there...I love the fact that when you do call...the best part about that call is that your hanging up after you call...I hate you...go away already and stop fucking calling.

I tried to spare you my wrath but I think that it is time to show you really of how I feel and what I am going to do to you to make myself feel alot better and it is going to start right now! I am so planning to cheat on you as soon as I can. You make me sick and you deserve it! You rather hang out with your friends than be with me... that is fine...there are so many guys that would love to be with me....youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re a fool and you think that I am a fool also...think again bitch...I am nobodyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fool...you are going to pay for the shit that you have done to me! I hate you alot of times and it hurts...but honestly I am going to enjoy this so much!

â&#x153;&#x161; To place your FREE ad (100-word limit), go to citypaper.net and click on

THE BUCK STOPS HERE

the LOVE/HATE tab near the top of the page. ADS ALSO APPEAR AT CITY-

Fuck you for taking advantage of your daughterâ&#x20AC;&#x2DC;s need for conformity, and pressuring her

Hate Youâ&#x20AC;?â&#x201E;˘ ads at the publisherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s discretion. This includes re-purposing the

PAPER.NET/lovehate. City Paper has the right to re-publish â&#x20AC;&#x153;I Love You, I ads for online publication, or for any other ancillary publishing projects.

You stupid bitch...I could just slap the taste out of your mouth! Who the fuck do you think that you are....a person like myself have been doing

YOUâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;RE DONE

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that you love me but you really donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t show it...I am tired of thinkin one thing and you seem to do whatever you like! What made you really tell me that you loved me? Can you answer that...I was going to fuck you anyway because I wanted to... you didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to deceive me on this love shit and you do whatever it is that you want to do...I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t like it nor am I going to put up with it! Letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sit down and be real with each other! Alright.... that sounds like a plan to me!

I AM PREGNANT I never thought that I would be saying these words out of my own mouth...I am just in shock... and what the fuck do you do...you take off somewhere...I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know where you are...I have been calling texting and everything. At this point I give up. I am not going to pursue you...I am just going to do what I have to do so that I can live and be right...I am so emotional right now...I just want to scream and holler! You will never know how empty I feel. You can go to hell in a fucking hand-basket.

into ending a loving relationship. What did this beautiful, kind, and intelligent woman ever do to suggest that she is incapable of making her own decisions? What have I ever done, for you to treat me with such contempt? Since when did true love become a bad thing? You are a vile, blue-collar, cock suckinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; piece of Northeast Philly trash - and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s because of your asinine opinions, there are now two more unhappy people in the world. I hope skin cancer and parasites eat away that ugly, old tattoo on your arm. I hope you spend your remaining days wheelchair-bound pissing into an ostomy bag, after your wife accidentally snaps your spinal cord while massaging your wrinkly old ass. I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t even know why Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m writing this. You probably canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t read. Oh, and by the wayâ&#x20AC;Śuntil your daughter and I straighten out the ugly mess you got us in, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve decided to continue banging our brains out behind your back. Surprise! Hahahahaâ&#x20AC;Ś

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Yo Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s me. I am still waiting to return to work. My unemployment will be running out in a few more weeks and I am tired of being scared of what is in store for me should I still remain out. I am long over due to not only return to work but to be like I never left.I really would like to be at the new complex when that breaks if possible and I am always willing to work night work as well.

what I do for years and here you come along like you shit donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t stink...you need to stay away from me because I am not a child and honestly I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t like you...you need to stay in your place. Do me a favor....donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t cross me...

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[ i love you, i hate you ]

27 31

By Matt Jones

“YOU MISSED!” — HE SHOOTS, HE DOESN’T SCORE.

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jonesin’

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Prescription figures renemy, in part Tenth-grader, for short Sportscaster Shaquille Not real, like some crab meat: abbr. Shade darker than eggshell “Spiffy!” 1958 Best Picture winner Summers abroad? Add atop a refuse pile, after aiming out and missing? Good, in Guatemala Room where church records are kept “Isn’t that somethin’?” Abbr. at an airport terminal Cave under weight Placing, at the track Strikes, in Biblical terms It’s inside an env. Sports uniform for an all-out brawl, after aiming back and missing? Cambodian currency Fox News analyst, often Focus for some committees Hit the jackpot Pai ___ (gambling game) National code-breaking gp. (found in VACATION) Member of a duo that “went to sea in a beautiful pea-green boat” Olympic swimmer with 12 medals ___ Torres

53 What your dog might do after eating his way through your linen closet, after aiming in and missing? 56 Actor Jon of Homicide 57 Marcia and Felicity’s co-star 58 Electronic bracelet site 59 Work without ___ (take risks) 60 Hold, like a vehicle 61 Magnus Carlsen’s game 62 IDs often used in identity theft 63 Pilot’s heading: abbr. 64 M*A*S*H setting

31 32 34 35

✚ DOWN

46 47 50 51 52 54 55

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 15 21 22 27 29 30

“Surprised?” follow-up Like many musical wonders Prepared like some ahi Shirley who was painted gold in Goldfinger Like molasses Square cookie Leaves out This clue’s number Fortune teller Linoleum pattern shapes, sometimes Just being there In a suddenly quiet way Stadium divisions Egg-shaped Heavyweight boxer Fields Rolls-Royce’s parent company Org. that operates the world’s largest particle physics lab One-person opera performances

36 37 38 42 43 45

Ma who says “baa” Happy acquaintance? Responds to (in a certain way) Letters to a Young Contrarian author Christopher Freeze again, like slush to ice Rapper with the 2011 hit “Work Out” Reeeeeally long time Sesame Street org., back in the day Seals (out) “Daily Manhattan media news and gossip” site Ultimatum ender Peace Nobelist Lech ___ Fencing swords Others, in Spanish “Tiny Bubbles” crooner Muesli ingredient It’s put on a chair in a prank

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CARE AND PROTECTION TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS SUMMONS BY PUBLICATION DOCKET NUMBER: CP 10L0019 COMMONWEALTH OF MASSACHUSETTS Juvenile Court Department Lowell Division 89 Appleton Street. Lowell, MA 01852 TO: HAYDEE RIVERA A petition has been presented to this court by DCF, seeking, as to the subject child(ren), SIXTO ANTONIO TORRES AND JAZMIN HEIDI TORRES, that said child(ren) be found in need of care and protection and committed to the Department of Children and Families. The court may dispense the right of the person named herein to receive notice of or to consent to any legal proceeding affecting the adoption, custody, or guardianship or any other disposition of the child(ren) named herein, if it Âżnds that the child(ren) is/are in need of care and protection and that the best interests of the child(ren) is/are in need of care and protection and that the best interests of the child(ren) would be served by said disposition.

classifieds

for a 2Bdrm apt in unique art deco high-rise. Amazing views, Central Location, HW Floors, Desk Attendant. $1500/mo. Available April. 215-735-8030. Lic #219789.

3PRING 'ARDEN

Entry. $960/mo. Available May. 215-735-8030. Lic #216245

the naked city | feature | a&e | the agenda | food

cation, Beautiful Art Deco details, Front Desk Attendant, HW Flrs, Onsite Laundry, Updated Kitch, Wonderful City Views. $1120/Mo. 215-735-8030. Lic #219789.

You are hereby ORDERED to appear in this court, at the court address set forth above, on 04/10/12, at 9:00 a.m., for a PRE-TRIAL CONFRENCE. You may bring an attorney with you. If you have a right to an attorney and if the court determines that you are indigent, the court will appoint an attorney to represent you. If you fail to appear, the court may proceed on that date and any date thereafter with a trial on the merits of the petition and an adjudication of this matter. For further information call the OfÂżce of the Clerk-Magistrate at 978-441-2630. WITNESS:Jay Blitzman. FIRST JUSTICE Asst. Elizabeth Sheehy. Clerk-Magistrate DATE ISSUED: 02/08/12

@2?C602@

THE HISTORIC

LENNOX APARTMENTS

Torchia & Associates

CONCIERGE LEGAL SERVICES GENERAL PRACTICE â&#x20AC;&#x201C; ESTATE & TAX PLANNING GENTLY MOVING YOUR EARTHLY POSSESSIONS

215.670.9535

WWW.MAMBOMOVERS.COM

NOTICE OF COMMENCEMENT OF LAWSUIT Please take notice that on February 11, 2011, a lawsuit was commenced against the following persons and entities in the Court of Common Pleas, First Judicial District, Philadelphia County, Pennsylvania, bearing the caption below. The lawsuit seeks to validate the interests of Plaintiff which he asserts by adverse possession in the property located at 233 Krams Avenue, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. COURT OF COMMON PLEAS OF PHILADELPHIA FIRST JUDICIAL DISTRICT OF PENNSYLVANIA CIVIL TRIAL DIVISION John W. Hinkle, Plaintiff vs. W. Egbert Mitchell, his heirs and assigns, Defendants No.: 110203207 NOTICE You have been sued in court. If you wish to defend against the claims set forth in the following pages, you must take action within twenty (20) days after this complaint and notice are served, by entering a written appearance personally or by attorney and ďŹ ling in writing with the court your defenses or objections to the claims set forth against you. You are warned that if you fail to do so the case may proceed without you and a judgment may be entered against you by the court without further notice for any money claimed in the complaint of for any other claim or relief requested by the plaintiff. You may lose money or property or other rights important to you. You should take this paper to your lawyer at once. If you do not have a lawyer or cannot afford one, go to or telephone the ofďŹ ce set forth below to ďŹ nd out where you can get legal help.

Jonathan H. Stanwood, Esquire 8 Penn Center Plaza, Suite 1000 Philadelphia, Pa 19103 (215) 569-1040

â&#x20AC;˘ BEAUTIFUL APARTMENTS WITH NEW KITCHENS AND BATHROOMS â&#x20AC;˘ HARDWOOD FLOORS AND NEW APPLIANCES â&#x20AC;˘ MINUTES FROM CHESTNUT HILL AND CENTER CITY â&#x20AC;˘ TWO BLOCKS FROM SEPTAâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S TULPEHOCKEN STATION â&#x20AC;˘ LAUNDRY ON SITE â&#x20AC;˘ FRIENDLY ON SITE MANAGEMENT AND MAINTENANCE STAFF

Prices Starting at: Studios $595 and One Bedrooms $695 232-242 W. Walnut Lane, Philadelphia, PA 19144 www.thelennoxapartments.com

(267) 297-7123

PHILADELPHIA BAR ASSOCIATION Lawyer Referral and Information Service One Reading Center Philadelphia, Pa.19107 Telephone: (215) 238-6333

â&#x20AC;˘ SPACIOUS STUDIOS AND ONE BEDROOM UNITS

P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R | M A R C H 8 - M A R C H 1 4 , 2 0 1 2 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T |

1420 Walnut Street, Suite 1216 215-546-1950; watorchia@gmail.com Williamtorchiaesquire.vpweb.com

food | the agenda | a&e | feature | the naked city classifieds

merchandise market PRIVATE ART COLLECTION - 2 Wyeth portfolios, Colombo, Esher, all signed pieces. Serious inquiries. 302-841-7515

2012 TOPPS HOBBY JUMBO box $118 #93 RALLY SQUIRRELL SP $110 215-552-9694

Laptops Net Ready, MS Office, Wireless From $165. 500 games $10, 610.453.2525

BRAZILIAN FLOORING 3/4", beautiful, $2.75 sf (215) 365-5826 CABINETS SOLID MAPLE Brand new soft close/dovetail. Crown molding. Can add or subtract to fit kitchen Cost $6400. Sell $1595. 610-952-0033 Pinball machines, shuffle bowling alleys. Will trade for new home carpeting. tntquality@aol.com 215.783.0823

Bd a Queen Pillow top matt set $175; King $250 mem foam $295. 215-752-0911

BD Mattress memory foam w/box sprIng Brand New Queen cost $1400, sell $299; King cost $1700 sell $399. 610-952-0033

BED: Brand New Queen Pillowtop Mattress Set w/warr, In plastic. $175; Twin $140; 3 pc King $265; Full set $155. Memory foams avl. Del. avl 215-355-3878

2012 Hot Tub/Spa. Brand New! 6 person, Color, Lights, Waterfall, Cover. Factory warranty. Never installed! Cost $7,000. Asking $3,200. 610-952-0033

BUYING EAGLES SBL’s & TICKETS

Coins, MACHINIST TOOLS, Militaria, Swords, Watches, Jewelry 215-742-6438

EAGLE SEAT Licenses (SBL) buy/sell here, EAGLESBL.COM 610-945-4700

Diabetic Test Strips, $$ Cash Paid $$ Nicotine patches, gum. For highest prices & pick-up, Call 215-395-7100.

DIABETIC TEST STRIPS NEEDED- cash paid, local pickup. Call Faith 856.882.9015

NEW MATTRESS Sets $125, Twin, Full Queen (in plastic) delivery (215)307-1950

WedgWood Women’s Club Indoor Yard Sale Sat. March 10 9am-1pm @ WedgWood Country Club 200 Hurffville Rd, Turnersville, NJ 40plus tables.

EAGLES: SEASON TICKETS (2); club level, Call 610-256-2835

Diabetic Test Strips needed pay up to $10/box. Most brands. Call 610-453-2525

WANTED: EAGLES SBL’S True Eagles fan, Call 610-586-6981

I Buy Anything Old...Except People! antiques-collectables, Al 215-698-0787 I Buy Vintage Clothing & Jewelry (jewelry can be broken) Call (267)974-8801

33 & 45 Records Absolute Higher $

YAMAHA DIGITAL PIANO YDP113- beautiful, like new, $700/OBO. 215-248-3613

* * * 215-200-0902 * * *

33&45 RECORDS HIGHER $ REALLY PAID

** Bob 610-532-9408 ***

54 | P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R |

M A R C H 8 - M A R C H 1 4 , 2 0 1 2 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T

everything pets pets/livestock Please be aware Possession of exotic/wild animals may be restricted in some areas.

Ragdoll Kittens: Beautiful, guaranteed, home raised. $500. Call 610-731-0907

AKITA Puppies AKC reg., ready now , 4 males, 1 female, $850, (267)981-6496 AKITA pure bred, 1st shots, mostly black with good markings $650. 570-394-7953 BICHONPOO Puppies, 3 males left, $450 each with shots. 609-504-1064 BORDER Collie pups, beautiful, parents AKC champ, $500 & up. 610-562-2244 BULLDOG/OLDE ENGLISH puppies. 8 weeks old, $1000. 215-490-4697 Bull Terrier AKC Puppies $1250. Ready 3-8-12. Call Jeremiah 717-239-9153 Bull Terrier Puppy Bonanza AKC reg., shots, serious inquiries only 267.251.3703 CANE CORSO Pups, ACCF reg., $500/OBO. Call 267-266-9749 Cavalier King Charles puppies Vet checked, health guarantee. Delivery available $750 to $850. (717)821-4953

CAVALIER KING CHARLES SPANIEL - AKC reg., ready April 4th. Call 215-813-4311 Cavalier King Charles Spaniel Puppies available, Call 215-538-2179

Golden Retriever Puppies, family raised, AKC, show quality, $800. 717-548-0946

English Mastiff/German Shepherd mix pups, vet checked, $250. 717-977-7071 German Shepherd Puppies, ACA Reg., S/W, farm raised, $450. 610-913-0393 German Shepherd Pups - AKC. lg boned, champ pedigree. Call 609-351-3205 German Shep Pups: Large Boned. Parents on prem. Good w/kids. www.jolindys.com. 410-957-1279. Golden-Doodles,Standard & Mini, F1, parents on premises, health guarantee, $500-$1000. Call (484)678-6696 Golden Ret. pups, AKC, family raised, vet exam, s/w, $600. Call (717)283-5808

JUNK CARS WANTED Up to $300 for Junk Cars 215-888-8662 Lionel/Am Flyer/Trains/Hot Whls $$$$ Aurora TJet/AFX Toy Cars 215-396-1903

jobs Housekeeper, errands, PT-FT, 5 yrs exp, refs,car,bkgd chk,Overbrook,215.290.2100

Havanese AKC Havanses Puppies $1250. www.leginshavanese.com 570-765-8324 Lab Pups AKC- blacks & yellows, health guaranteed, $500. (814)441-2142

CHOW PUPS : CKC reg., s & w, 3M/3F different colors, $500. (717)203-3764 Doberman Pups, AKC, 7M, 1F, $800. raised in my home. 302-286-7560 English Bulldog pups, 10 wks & 30 wks (cheaper) grandparents & parents on premise, shots, papers. 215-696-5832 English Bulldog pups, Large, 8 weeks, must see $900. 267-231-9722 ENGLISH BULLDOGS AKC, champ blood lines, wrinkles+, health guar, vet check, shots/worm. $1,800 484-319-0571

Dr. Sonnheim, 856-981-3397

CALL 215-669-1924

Moving Sale, liv rm, dinn rm & bdrm sets. everything must go 267-650-2548

BABY GRAND PIANO, YAMAHA 5 ft 8 in., Disklavier Mark III series, model # DC2A. Mint Cond. $20,000. (610)566-8930

Coins, Currency, Gold, Toys,

Trains, Hummels, Sports Cards. Call the Local Higher Buyer, 7 Dys/Wk

Bedroom set 6 pc. Cherry Brand new, in box $499. 215-752-0911 Bedroom Set brand new queen 5 pc esp. brown $489; twin, full, king size avail. Mattress Avail. Del Avail 215-355-3878

Books -Trains -Magazines -Toys Dolls - Model Kits 610-689-8476

Caregiver/Companion seeks job as livein or live-out. Call 267-756-3964

Lab Pups AKC, blk/ white, vet checked, 8 wks, shots/wormed,$500. 717.733.1793 MALTESE PUPS - Ready to Go! Call 856-875-6707 Mini Doberman Pinscher pups brown & chocolate, $300. 215-739-2160 Pit Bull: Camelot Red Nose puppies www.DelawareRedPitBulls.com *health guar., *current shots, *ADBA reg. $1000. Matt (302)750-4882

Borough Manager/Secretary Selinsgrove, PA

Selinsgrove Borough is hiring a Manager/Secretary. Please visit our website at www.selinsgrove.org EOE

Poodle pups (Toy) CKC, 8wks, cute M/F, s/w, colors, $450 & up. 267-297-8662 Rhodesian Ridgeback Pups: Champ Sired CH Nashira’s Excalibur of Ridgelea. CH Highcalibur Kimani’s Double Standard. Call 609-465-3073

Rottweiler pups, AKC, ready now, s/w, vet checked, $695. 717-940-7249 SHIH TZU PUPS ACA, 15 weeks, $850. Call 215-752-1393 West HighlandTerrier pups, health guaranteed, family raised 717-201-4951 Wheaten Terriers, soft coated (nonshed), 8 wks, $900. Call 215-407-6712

Psychology Manager Wilmington, DE

Experienced licensed psychologist to oversee staff who manage mental health and substance abuse services for youth. Supervises clinicians planning for level of care and treatment goals; authorizing services; managing risk and monitoring progress. Requires experience with developmental, mental health and substance abuse and knowledge of best practices. Delaware is an equal opportunity and affirmative action employer. Apply at: www.jobaps.com/de/ sup/images/default.asp.

Catalyst Rx

Philadelphia, PA

Catalyst Rx, a division of Catalyst Health Solutions (NasdaqGS: CHSI), is a Pharmacy Benefits Management Company, currently seeking to fill the following positions: µ Client Advisor, Medicare Services Qualifications: Bachelor’s Degree or equivalent work exp req. 3+ years of exp with Medicare Part D in a client services or operations role as well as knowledge of CMS regulations. µ Clinical Manager, Govt. Services Qualifications: Doctor of Pharmacy or equivalent required with current licensure. Qualified candidates should have 2+ years of exp at PBM or health plan, at least 1 year in a client facing role, 2+ years of Medicare Part D exp with strong knowledge of applicable laws & regulatory req. All Candidates must possess the ability to build solid relationships with client’s key decision makers to ensure a strong, cohesive business relationship is established & maintained. EOE. We offer a highly competitive salary & excellent benefits including a 401(k) plan & a car benefit. Please forward resume & salary req. to Lcallaruss@catalystrx.com

Distribution Center Manager Greater Philadelphia Area

Large national retail corporation seeks a highly experienced Distribution Center Manager to manage their 130,000 sq. ft. facility located in the greater Philadelphia area. The DC Manager is responsible for the overall performance of the warehouse, including operations, customer service, office operations and transportation. Plans, organizes, staffs, directs, and controls all warehouse and transportation activities and ensures the selection, professional development, and motivation of all team members. The DC Manager assists top management in establishing warehouse performance objectives, expense controls and strategic planning, and is accountable for achieving prescribed company objectives in regard to cost control, productivity, customer service and profits. Job Qualifications : The ideal candidate will possess a minimum of 10 years’ experience in warehousing and logistics management- Proficiency with personal computers and material handling equipment is required. Must possess a proven track record in planning, staffing, budgeting, organizing, controlling, and people management. The ability to develop effective relationships, provide leadership and integrate diverse organizations and individuals toward common objectives is critical. Education College degree is preferred Submit resume to recruiter886gmaiLcom

AMEC ENGINEERING &

CONSTRUCTION SERVICES INC. CAREER FAIR

Marriott (Downtown) 1201 Market St, Philadelphia, PA March 9th; 12:00-5:00 AND March 10th; 8:00 - 12:00 Meeting Room #301 To learn more about AMEC and to review all our current openings please visit w w w . a m e c . c o m . This is an exciting time AMEC due to anticipated growth for 2012 we are seeking the following opportunities for our Atlanta, GA, Greenville. SC and Minneapolis, MN locations.We will have AMEC operations & HR staff on site to discuss our company & opportunities & with you. EOE

Field Service Technician

233 Delsea Dr., Sewell NJ.

Matcon USA Inc. is a leading supplier of Bulk Material Handling equipment and systems for the worldwide process industry. Fulltime position with benefits responsibilities: Responsible for providing technical service activities at customer sites, such as troubleshoot, repair, educate, install and commission of equipment. Pre-Requisites: µ High School graduate µ Working knowledge of mechanical, electrical and pneumatic principals. Desired Experience: µ College experience µ Fair understanding of PLC h/w and s/w Please email resumes to: psp66psp@yahoo.com www.matconibc.com

CHIEF FINANCIAL OFFICER

Saint Joseph’s Preparatory School - Philadelphia

a Catholic, Jesuit college preparatory school serving nearly 1,000 young men-is seeking qualified candidates for an experienced Chief Financial Officer. The ideal candidate will possess a combination of the following: µ Undergraduate degree in accounting, finance or economics; MBA a plus; Certified Public Accountant preferred µ 10+ years progressive experience in finance and management. Earlier career progression from a public accounting firm is desirable; µ A strong commitment to the philosophy, mission and core values of Jesuit education; µ Excellent interpersonal and communication skills and proven leadership at the managerial level. To view the entire job posting and the mission and characteristics of the school visit our website at www.sjprep.org/employment Equal Opportunity Employer

Locust & 22nd Studio $695+utils nwly remod, w/w crpt, a/c, 267.439.2461

27xx Brown St 1br/1ba $850+utils 1st floor of duplex, Call 866-832-6319

15th & Wharton 1 BR $650+gas/elec references required. Call 856-465-3464

32nd & Dickinson 1br $625+utils well kept, w/d, fridge, Dave 610-352-6491

53xx Chester Ave 1br $550+elec 42xx Frankford Ave. 1br $500+elec 1st, last & sec., nwly renov 215.559.9289

4941 Rubicam St. Big 2Br 1st flr, porch, backyd, quiet. 215.833.4297 5220 Wayne Ave. Studio & 1 BR on site lndry, 215-744-9077, Lic# 507568 5321 Wayne Ave. Efficiency $550 3br $725. 1st mo. & sec., 215-776-6277 63xx Magnolia St 1BR $650+utils updated, 1st flr., w/w carpets, EIK, W/D hookups, garage. Call 610-547-7355

High & Belfield Efficiency $500+elec 3rd flr, move in cond, 215-844-5034

4309 Tower St 2BR/1BA $1200 2 blks to Main St., d/w, w/d, garb/disp, c/a, deck, yard. No pets. 215-518-1275

DOMINO LN 1 & 2 BR $695-$875 Renovated, parking, d/w, near shopping & dining, move in special, 215-500-7808

7xx S 51st St. efficiency $550 3rd flr, Section 8 approved. 610-812-6352 1x Meeham Ave. 2 BR $675-$750/mo very nice, marble & hw flrs,215-868-4130 1420 N 52nd St. 2 BR $650 + utils triplex, very clean, private entry, security doors, 2 blocks from mall, 267-588-1777

14xx N. 56th St. 1BR $600+elec. Duplex, nice, nr transp., 215-300-9440 214 N. 54th St. 1BR $585 1st,last, sec required, 610-454-0292 40th & Fairmount vic. 1BR $450/mo. 3rd flr., fridge. Call 215-222-2403 42nd & Parkside 1br $560+utils fin. bsmnt., newly renov. 610-551-1023 Larchwood Ave Spacious 1.5BR $675 eat-in kitch, liv rm, hdwd flrs215.877.1097 Parkside area 1BR & 2BR $700-$900 hdwd flrs, new construction, PHA, Sec 8 ok, 1 block from Park. (215)791-2722

W. Phila 2, 3 & 4 br Bi-Levels Avail Now Move in Special! 215-386-4791 or 4792

20xx N. 62nd 1-2BR $650-$950 nice block, 1st, last & sec. (215)878-5056 Various 1, 2 & 3 BR Apts $725-$895 www.perutoproperties.com 215.740.4900

8th & Allegheny 1.5Br $600+electric 1st +l ast + security Call 267-304-0887 Strawberry Mansion 1BR newly renovated. Call 215-430-0737

1,2, 3, 4 Bedroom FURNISHED APTS LAUNDRY-PARKING 215-223-7000

12xx Airdrie St. 2 BR $650 spacious rooms, updated kitchen, conv lo cation, 267-872-4709 or 267-304-3220

38xx N. 15th new 2Br $600+utils 2nd fl, beautiful, renov, n/s, 267.809.7866 Broad & Stiles 1br $625+utils secured, spacious rooms, exposed brick, hdwd flrs/carpets, ceramic kitch, finished lower level, off st parking. (267)918-1420

$675

80xx Fayette 2BR $750+utils 2 months + sec. to move in 215-410-6907 Dorset & Mansifeld 2br $815+utils new kitchen, bath, w/w & ceiling fans, garage, laundry facilities (215)836-7471

East Mt. Airy 2BR/1BA $950+ gas & elec Duplex Apt for Rent. Modern spacious. Dishwasher, Refrigerator, Washer & Dryer, central air, w/w carpet. SECTION 8 ACCEPTED w/2 BDR Voucher. Ready to occupy. Shown by appt. Call 215-572-5082 Roumfort Rd. 2br $850+utils fully renov., new carpet throughout, open concept w/ breakfast bar, secure building. 973-866-6452 or sjcoak@gmail.com W. Mt. Airy 2 BR/1 BA $1250+ utils In restored Mansion, LR, fplc, hw flrs, mod kit, SS appls, w/d, c/a, DW, microwave, off st prkg. A Jefferson 215-849-4343

65xx Fairhill St. 1br $675+utils newly renov., 1st, last & sec. 215-817-0101 66 S t- Studio & 1BR MOVE IN SPECIALS! heat/wtr/gas inc Sec8ok 215-768-8243 E.O.L: 67xx 7th St. 2br $600+utils 2 month security. Call 215-224-6566

3497 Jasper 4BR/1BA $750+ gas & electric. Call (267)456-8383

4645 Penn St. 1BR $625. newly renov gas/wtr inc 215-781-8072

28xx Ryerson 2br duplex $800 2nd floor, bsmt, gar, yard, 267-784-2809 5923 Hegerman 1br $550 prvt prkg, laundry, storage 610.710.1986

94xx Woodbridge 2br $750+utils Call 215-725-7079 Academy & Grant 2BR $795+ 1st flr,w/w, c/a,off st prkg 856.346.0747

59xx Ogontz Ave 2br $850+utils Call: (267)625-9027 after 7pm

NE & N Phila spac renov effic& rms start @ $100wk 215-391-2797, 267-979-7081 PHILMONT HEIGHTS 2 BR 1st flr $825 new kitch, w/w & paint, gar, 267.467.1596

5853 N. Camac 1BR $650+utils granite kit, 267.271.6601 or 215.416.2757 60XX Warnock 1 BR $595+ near Fernrock Train Station,215-276-8534

Rhawn & Academy 1br Condo $695 w/enclosed garden patio. (215)943-0370 Somerton area 2br $695+ w/w, 2nd flr, DR, yard, 856-346-0747

Havertown Condo 2Br/1.5Ba $1100 balcony, pool, parking, (610)964-0554

Belmar 1BR prvt entr., off st prkg, 5 mins to Phila., no pets. 856-858-4830 or 430-2900

11xx N. 55TH ST. BRAND NEW BUILDING Single rooms $400. Double rooms $600. Rooms w/ bath & kitchen $600. Rooms come fully furnised w/ full size beds, fridge, and dresser. SSI/SSD/VA & Public assistance ok. Also SW, West, North Phila, Frankford areas. Call 267-707-6129 20th & Erie, brand new furnished rooms $100-$120/week, SSI OK, (267)690-0204 22nd & Allegheny, $85/week, share kitchen & bath, SSI OK, 267-973-0397 22nd & Indiana Ave $100/week Room in immaculate cond. 215-888-2476 23rd & Hunting Pk., 2 lrg, clean, renov., w/w, $85-$100/wk., 215-960-1600 2420 N Chadwich St & 2549 N. 16th St. New renov rms, $85/wk. 484-885-6903 2435 W. Jefferson St. Rooms: $380/mo, Move in fee: $570. Call 215-913-8659 25th & Clearfield, 51st & Wanamaker, 51st & Chester, Share Kitch. & Bath, $350 & up, No sec dep, SSI OK . 1br Apt at 42nd & Westminster. Call 215-758-7572 28th & York shared kit/bath, $95/week. 267-816-3058 29th & Cumberland, furn. rooms, share kitchen, private BA, SSI OK 267.528.9250 29xx Taylor St., lrg furnished rooms, cable ready, $125/wk. Call 267-586-5208 32nd & Diamond EFFICIENCY APT $525/ month. Shared bath. 2 months to move in. 267- 516-7917 4508 N. Broad St. Rooms: $400/mo. Move in fee: $600. Call 215-913-8659

51xx Race St. - Furn. room, clean & quiet. Single occupancy, no drugs or smoking. $400/mo. & up. SSI ok. Call 267.847.0681 53xx N. Broad St Room, fridge, Full size bed, 27" TV, AC, 267-496-6448 55th & Lansdowne; 13th & York; 52nd & Race. Call 215-290-8702 61st & Walnut - New Rooms To Rent $350 to move in, Call (267)-586-8404

6255 Limekiln Pike $125/week Room for rent. 215-549-2111 8th & Allegheny 2 furnished rooms, cable included, $100/wk (267)304-0887

A1 Nice, well maintained rms, N. & W. Phila. Starting @ $125/wk 610.667.9675 Broad & Hunting Pk, lrg, newly renov., furnished $100/wk, must see (215)570-0301 Broad & Lehigh - Fully furn rooms for rent, quiet block. Call 267-386-6641 Broad & Olney deluxe furn room priv ent $110 -$145wk. Sec $200. 215-572-8833 Broad & Somerville clean, furn, newly decorated, near transp. 215-455-7488 Frankford area single rooms $110/wk per person, Sec. dep. req. 215-432-5637 Frankford, furnished, near bus & El, $85/wk & up + $295 sec. 215-526-1455 Germantown Area: NICE, Cozy Rooms Private entry, no drugs (215)548-6083 GTN & North Phila $350-$400 1occupant Clean furn rooms for rent. 267-276-2153 Hunting Park area $110 /week. Large room, share kitchen/bath. 215-668-6826 Hunting Park: Furn. Luxury Rooms. Free utils, cable & internet. 267-331-5382 Hunting Park & South Philadelphia large rooms, close to transporation, SSI OK. $85-125/week. Call (215)668-4812

homes for rent 21xx Manton St 3br/1ba $800+utils newly remod., hwd flrs, new kit w/granite countertops, new bathroom (215)917.1091 31xx Dickenson 3BR $700 newly renovated, new carpet & kitchen, fresh paint, front porch. 267-249-6645

1847 S. Conestoga 3Br $725+ gas & elect, HW flrs, fin bsmt, Open Hse 2/1 & 2/2 3pm,credit check 267.249.6446 65th and Chester Ave 3br $995 Modern, new hardwood flrs, wall-wall, dishwasher, Section 8 OK. 215-370-0861 78xx Saturn Pl. 3br $965 avail 4/1, nice neighborhd, 610.710.1986 SW (Elmwood Area) 3br house modern, Section 8 welcome 215.726.8817

1xx N. Dewey 3BR/1BA Remodeled, section 8 ok. 215-609-5207 2br & 3br Houses Section 8 welcome beautifully renovated, (267)981-2718 42xx Haverford Ave 2.5Br $750 den, in great shape. Call 215-409-8383 54xx Pentridge St. 3br $750 new carpet & paint, avl now 610.710.1986 57th & Walnut lrg 4BR $1,400+utils renov, hdwd flrs, Sec 8 OK 610-649-9009 W. Phila 3br & 4br homes $950-$1000 beautiful, brand nw, sec 8 ok 610.331.9173

25xx Dakota St. 2br $525+utils W Phila: 2xx N Salford 3br $750+utils 1st & last mo. rent. req. 609-702-8383 North Phila 3BR $900/mo. newly renov. bsmnt/gar. 732-407-1389

76xx Thouron 3Br $950 great neighborhd, avail 4/1, 610.710.1986

7xx E Allegheny large 2br/1.5ba $685+ newly renovated, 215-836-1960 Kensington 2BR & 3BR $600-$725 1st, last, 1 month security, 215-399-6187

41xx Salem St. 3br $1050+utils w/w carpet, W/D, refrigerator, full yard, newly renovated. Call 610-587-2400

Bridge & Frankford vic. 3br/1ba $995 newly renovated, Sec 8 ok. 215.479.5508

4621 Kraydor St. 3 BR/1 BA $875 finished bsmnt, lndry, mod. kitch, garage, newly remod, garb/disp (215)327-0303 57xx Torresdale Ave 4br/1ba $950 backyard, EIK, fin. bsmnt. 215-805-2821 9xx Carver St 3BR Sec 8 ok, Call 267-255-6286

COATESVILLE 4BR/1.5Ba $1150 gas heat, good storage, big yard, avail now 610-209-4857

CHESTER: 225 Ivy St. 2BR $550 2209 W 3rd St. 4BR/2BA $900 1123 Terrill St. 3BA $750 Newly Renovated, Call 610-772-3220 COLLINGDALE 3BR/1BA $900+ utils $1300 security, avail. now, 610-353-6705 Colwyn 3BR/1BA $950+utils Newly renov., deck, C/A, whirpool bath, 2 mo sec. + 1 mo rent. Call 215-954-8840 Upper Darby: 72xx Calvin Rd 3br $950 Updates, spacious and freshly painted. Carpet floors throughout. 484-904-3084

Upper Darby 3br Rent to buy $1000/mo. Good credit only. Call (917)755-0727

automotive TL TECH 2010 $26,500 41k, blk, loaded, must sell (610)996-0203

STS 2006 $18,000 25k mi, exc cond. Ext. warr. 215-460-9317

Classic 1990 fire engine red coup w/ removable metal roof, positively flawless, 31K ORIG MILES, perhaps finest avail., Sr. citizen, ill sacrifice for substainially less then book value $11,950. 215-627-1814

FUSION SEL 2008 $14,500 14K, white, V6, lthr, loaded. 215-565-5428

Lincoln TownCar 2002 Signature Series, Luxury 4 dr, orig mi, superb cond, quick private sale, $5,950. Call 215-629-0630

F350 XLT Crew Cab 1999 $10,400/OBO 4WD, new tires, exc. cond. 610-585-0510

Lincoln Continental Sedan 1964 $4500 rebuilt drive train, new paint, no rust, new chrome, new tires, (215)262-6131

$300 & UP FOR JUNK CARS CALL 215-722-2111 CASH FOR CARS - Any Type of Vehicles: High Quality orJunk Cars. (732)221-4008

Cash paid on the spot for unwanted vehicles, 24/7 pick up, 215-288-9500

Junk Cars & Trucks Wanted, $400, Call 856-365-2021

King of Prussia Luxury Townhouse 3br/2.5ba, $1500/mo. den w/ fireplace, large deck, new appls, patios, upscale area w/amenities, adjacent to Valley Forge Park, excellent school district, 832545-8164 or hraider544@yahoo.com NORRISTOWN 5Br/1.5Ba lrg fenced in yard, Sec 8 OK484.636.8205

Cherry Hill lovely 4Br/3Ba $2,100+utils near Phila,lrg LR,yrd+studio908.464.6728

Williamstowne/Monroe 4br $1,590 detached garage & shop, 917-653-0272

resorts/rent

JUNK CARS WANTED 24/7 REMOVAL. Call 267-377-3088

A1 PRICES FOR JUNK CARS FREE TOW ING , Call (215) 726-9053

low cost cars & trucks Cadillac Sedan 1977 $2850 estate sale, excellent 610-667-4829 Chevy Cavalier 2003 $3,200/obo gas saver, 62k, runs new, (267)441-4612

Ventnor, NJ 2BR/1BA $1,200 + utils 123 N. Avolyn Ave. Newly Renovated, Great Location. No Smoking/No Pets. Call 856-287-8010

Ford 1996 Luxury Conv. Van (new body style) a/c, full pwr, TV, like new, 51K ORIG MILESquick prvt sale $3975 215.922.5342

FORD E-250 Cargo Van 1998 $1450 149k, racks, shelves, white 856-577-6463 Ford Ranger XLT 1999 $2,750 ext. cab, 6 cyl., auto, nice. 215-847-7346

4455 N Gratz St. 3 BR $750+ sec newly renovated, w/w crpt, 267.581.8393

N. MYRTLE BEACH, SC 2br/2ba condo Across Street from Beach, 800 sq. ft., 2 balconies, 3 TVs, DVD/VCR, weekly rentals, $500-$700. (410)697-3396 Wildwood 1br Efficiency season $4000 +sec. 1 & 1/2 Blks to Beach 609-707-1990

52xx Knox St. 4br/1ba $1100+utils available immed, Sec 8 ok, 267-230-0513

Locust Lakes 5 BR/2 BA week or wknds Ski Season with sauna. (610)469-0952

Hyundai Sonata 2006 $4999 70k, V6, auto, runs great, 267-825-2315 Pontiac Grand Am SE 2003 $4495 80k, auto, gorgeuos, 610-524-8835 Volkswagen Jetta GL 1996 $1750 4 dr, VR6, 5 speed, loaded 215-947-9840

SAAB 93 2001 $3800 Great Car, Good Mileage, Onstar, Must See. Call (267)377-3088

LaSALLE UNIV AREA 4BR 1.5BA hdwd flrs, full kitchen, Patio $1650/ month NOT incl utils. 215-850-6618

Red Lion/Verree Road Vic. Duplex 1 lrg oversized BR, nr trans & shopping, $680+utils. 3 mo. req, 215-808-8863

Darby, PA 1BR +office $750 incls heat 1st flr, newly remodeled (305)453-6266 Yeadon 1br $790 includes eat-in kitchen hardwood floors, garage parking, + utilities, available April 1st, Section 8 ok, 610-212-7156.

62xx Magnolia 3br/1ba $900+ all utils section 8 ok, 215-740-4629

P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R | M A R C H 8 - M A R C H 1 4 , 2 0 1 2 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T |

3850 N. 13th St. 1br $575 washer, yard, near shops (267) 304-1387

2103 Chelten 1 BR apt EVERYTHING NEW!!! 215-284-5394

WARMINSTER Lg 1-2-3 BR Sect. 8 OK 2 MONTHS FREE RENT!!! HURRY!! Pets & smoking ok. We work with credit problems. Call for Details: 215-443-9500

homes for rent

classifieds

20xx Federal St 1BR Apt. furnished nice, modern, call 9a-5p (267)516-0977

1 BR & 2 BR Apts $715-$835 spacious, great loc., upgraded, heat incl, PHA vouchers accepted 215-966-9371

56xx Chew Ave. 3br /1ba New renov, porch, sec 8 ok 215.410.8753. 5xx E Queen Lane 2br $650 Call 267-242-5675 or 215-920-3851

the naked city | feature | a&e | the agenda | food

apartment marketplace

NE PHILADELPHIA furnished room, $125/wk, $125 deposit. 215-501-0771 LaSalle Univ area $125/week Renov furn rooms 215-843-4481 Mount Airy $100/wk. Large furnished room ideal for student. 678-789-4696 Mt. Airy, Germantown, SW & West rms, $85-$125/wK, SSI OK. 215-602-2252 North 57th St. $125/wk. Very lrg, newly renov., furn. 267.997.5583 North East Phila., Newly renov, nicely furnished, A/C W/D, cable, clean, safe & secure. Call (267)333-0901 North Phila: $90-$125/wk, newly renov., use of kitch, private entry 215-704-0312 North Philadelphia room, $100-$125/wk Newly renov, kit available. 267-972-6716 North Phila. small, med or large rms based on single occup. $350 to $450 215-913-1485 or 267-312-1499 N. Phila furnished room avail. mature adults with income, 215-384-4828 N Phila Furn, Priv Ent $75 & up . No drugs, SSI ok. available now 215.763.5565 N. Philly Rooms for Rent - Clean & furnished, comm. kit, all utils incl, easy access to transp. Call 267-809-3809 Olney & N. Phila. Furn rms cpt, nr trans, kit, w/d $85+. Call 516-527-0186 Penrose & SW Rooms: $75 & up SSI & Disability ok. (302)391-0490 SW and West Philadelphia $125-$150 priv rm & ba, clean & new. 215-939-5854 SW,N, W Move-in Special! $90-$125/wk Clean furn. rooms. SSI ok. 215-220-8877 SW Phila - Newly renov, close to trans. $100/wk 1st wk FREE, 267-628-7454 SW Phila room 58th & Beaumont newly renov. $120 week. 347-262-3485 Temple Hosp. area, $400/mo, full kitch, 2 full bath, SSI/SSD OK. 215-917-9369 TIOGA: Vic of Broad & Erie. Rms for rent, Seniors Welcome. $100/wk 215-226-0321 West Phila/Overbrook near 63rd St., fully furn, free food, SSI ok 267.586.8350 W Phila & G-town: newly ren lg, lux rms /apts. ALL utils incl, SSI ok, 215-519-4715 W. Phila rm w/priv BA, shared kitch $280 to move-in $140/wk, (215)713-5854

billboard [ C I T Y PA P E R ]

MARCH 8 - MARCH 14, 2012 CALL 215-735-8444

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Bachelor Party Headquarters All Nude, All The Time Home Of The 5 min. Lap Dance 8:00pm â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 5:00am

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185 South Carolina Ave. Atlantic City (South Carolina & Boardwalk)

609-340-8820

11am-3pm. AND YOU CAN SMOKE! Could this get any better? No. 12 Steps Down 9th & Christian Streets 215-238-0379

HAPPY HOUR AT THE ABBAYE $2 OFF ALL DRAFTS $3 WELL DRINKS $5 HAPPY HOUR MENU Only at the Abbaye 637 N. 3rd Street (215) 627-6711 www.THEABBAYE.net

Building Blocks to Total Fitness 12 Years of experience. Offering personal fitness training, nutrition counseling, and flexibility training. Specialize in osteoporosis, injuries, special needs. In home or at 12th Street Gym. MCKFitness@yahoo.com

STUDY GUITAR W/ THE BEST David Joel Guitar Studio All Styles All Levels. Former Berklee faculty member. Masters Degree with 27 yrs. teaching experience. 215.831.8640 www.myphillyguitarlessons.com

I BUY RECORDS, CDâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S, DVDâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S

TOP PRICES PAID. No collection too small or large! We buy everything! Call Jon at 215-805-8001 or e-mail dingo15@hotmail.com

Â˝ PRICED DRAFTS WEEKDAYS 5-7PM

17 Rotating Drafts Close to 200 Bottles

www.devilsdenphilly.com www.facebook.com/devilsdenphiladelphia www.twitter.com/devilsdenphilly

Sexual Intelligence

Guaranteed-quality,body-safe sexuality products, lubricants, male room, sex-ed classes, fetish gear, Aphrodite Gallery SEXPLORATORIUM 620 South 5th Street www.sexploratoriumstore.com

NEW AT THE EL BAR!!!

KENSINGTON HAPPY MEAL! EVERY DAY UNTIL 7PM 2 ALL BEEF HOT DOGS A PBR POUNDER A BAG OF CHIPS AND A TOY ALL FOR $5

SOCIETY HILL LOAN P H I L LY â&#x20AC;&#x2122; S PA W N S H O P

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Collectibles, Antiques, Musical Instruments, Cameras, Electronics Check Cashing â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Money Orders- Money Gram Agent. We Buy Gift Cards 645 South Street, Philadelphia. 215-925-7357

TEQUILA SUNRISE RECORDS

HAPPY HOUR AT THE DIVE

Learn the Art of Rock

Healthy, College Educated Men 18-39 ~ $150/Sample WWW.123DONATE.COM

525 West Girard Ave VINYL AND CD SPECIALISTS CLASSIC & MODERN GLOBAL SOUNDS HOUSE TECHNO DUBSTEP DUB DISCO FUNK SOUL JAZZ DIY PUNK LSD ROCK AND LIGHT HARMONY ROOTS BLUES NOISE AVANT AND MORE TUESDAY-SUNDAY 12-6PM 01-215-965-9616 Guitar, Bass and Drum Lessons www.rawku.com Call Daniel @ 215.844.7295

SILK CITY Â&#x2DC; Â&#x2DC;

FRIDAY

PEX VS PLAYLOOP

LEE MAYJAHS? & DJ EVERYDAY SATURDAY

DJ DEEJAY SUNDAY

SUNDAE

DANCE COMPETITION Open every day 4pm - 2am Sat & Sun Brunch 10am - 4pm 5th & Spring Garden www.silkcityphilly.com

DANCERS WANTED

Flexible hours, will train, no experience necessary, excellent pay, safe/secure environment. Call (609) 707-6075

THE BULLETS! Roots Rockin Legends ROCK THIS JOINT! Sat. 8pm, $5 @ Jackâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Twin Bar Glouchester City, NJ

FREE PIZZA! $2 BEER OF THE WEEK! $2 WELL DRINKS! ITâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S AMAZING! PASSYUNK AVE (7th & CARPENTER) 215-465-5505 myspace.com/thedivebar

SEMEN DONORS NEEDED Azuka Theatre Presents Hope Street and Other Lonely Places Mar. 15-Apr. 1 @ Off-Broad Street Theater azukatheatre.org

WATKINâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S DRINKERY

Happy hour everyday even weekends - from 5-7. 1/2 price on all 6 taps! Check out our upstairs game room with pool, darts, and some classic arcade games. On the corner of 10th & Watkins Streets in South Philly.

Aries Birthday Celebration! All-White Party!

Sat 3/31, 9pm at the New Palladium 229 W. Allegheny Ave. Dress: All-White, Advance Tix: $15 Have Your â&#x20AC;&#x153;Ariesâ&#x20AC;? Party With Us! Call Now: 215-222-7127

YOU PICKâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; EM OUT, WE STICKâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; EM IN!

Philadelphia Eddies 621 Tattoo Haven 621 South 4th St (Middle of Tattoo Row) 215-922-7384 Open 7 Days

The Real Housewives of South Philly March into MADNESS!

The Waitstaffâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s SPRING Sketch Comedy Show W/Special Guests: Rick Santorum and Jesus H. Christ Tues 3/13 at 8pm at Helium Comedy Club 2031 Sansom Street, Tix: $15 www.TheWaitstaff.com