Philadelphia City Paper, March 15th, 2012

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cpstaff We made this

Publisher Nancy Stuski Editor in Chief Theresa Everline Senior Editor Patrick Rapa News Editor Samantha Melamed Web Editor/Food Editor Drew Lazor Arts Editor/Copy Chief Emily Guendelsberger Associate Editor/Movies Editor Josh Middleton Senior Writer Isaiah Thompson Staff Writer Daniel Denvir Assistant Copy Editor Carolyn Wyman Contributors Sam Adams, A.D. Amorosi, Janet Anderson, Rodney Anonymous, Mary Armstrong, Nancy Armstrong, Meg Augustin, Justin Bauer, Shaun Brady, Peter Burwasser, Anthony Campisi, Ryan Carey, Jane Cassady, Mark Cofta, Felicia D’Ambrosio, Jesse Delaney, Adam Erace, M.J. Fine, David Anthony Fox, Cindy Fuchs, K. Ross Hoffman, Brian Howard, Deni Kasrel, Gary M. Kramer, Gair “Dev 79” Marking, Robert McCormick, Andrew Milner, Cassie Owens, Michael Pelusi, Nathaniel Popkin, Robin Rice, Lee Stabert, Andrew Thompson, Tom Tomorrow, Char Vandermeer, John Vettese, Bruce Walsh, Julia West, Brian Wilensky Editorial Interns Beth Boyle, Chris Brown, James Friel, Michael Gold, Al Harris, Katie Linton, Abigail Minor, Courtney Sexton, Alexandra Weiss, Nina Wilbach Associate Web Editor/Staff Photographer Neal Santos Production Director Michael Polimeno Editorial Art Director Reseca Peskin Senior Designer Evan M. Lopez Editorial Designer Matt Egger Contributing Photographers Jessica Kourkounis, Mark Stehle Contributing Illustrators Ryan Casey, Don Haring Jr., Joel Kimmel, Thomas Pitilli, Matthew Smith Human Resources Ron Scully (ext. 210) Office Manager/Sales Coordinator/Financial Coordinator Tricia Bradley (ext. 232) Circulation Director Mark Burkert (ext. 239) Senior Account Managers Nick Cavanaugh (ext. 260), Sharon MacWilliams (ext. 262), Stephan Sitzai (ext. 258) Account Managers Sara Carano (ext. 228), Chris Scartelli (ext.

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contents Total noodle heads

Naked City ...................................................................................6 Arts & Entertainment.........................................................10 Movies.........................................................................................17 Food & Drink ...........................................................................27 Agenda........................................................................................31 COVER PHOTOGRAPH BY NEAL SANTOS DESIGN BY RESECA PESKIN

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naked

the thebellcurve CP’s Quality-o-Life-o-Meter

[ - 4]

Former Gov. Ed Rendell has made speeches in Paris and Geneva on behalf of an Iraqbased group of Iranian exiles that the State Department has labeled a terrorist organization. “I do not make deals with terrorists,” says Rendell. “They paid full price. So. Who wants some meth? I make meth now.”

[ - 3]

The Treasury Department has subpoenaed Rendell’s financial records, since his speaking fees might qualify as transactions with a terrorist organization. So far, though, it’s just 15,000 receipts from Popeyes and a $20 million down payment on the Daily News.

[ 0]

The Philadelphia Business Journal determines that the Market-Frankford El is SEPTA’s busiest route. We’re more excited for their next study: Which Philadelphia baseball team has the most fans?

[ - 2]

Overhead wires fall onto a trackless SEPTA trolley in the Northeast, momentarily trapping passengers who were afraid of being electrocuted. Witnesses claim to have seen Rendell fleeing the scene by rooftop, a pair of gardening shears in his hand, his lush carpet of back hair sticking up and smoking.

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[ + 1] A Philly woman who faked cancer to get

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city

out of a four-month prison term in 2007 is sentenced to five years. Sounds like somebody needs schemotherapy. (Sorry.We have trouble walking away from puns.)

[ + 1] Police Commissioner Charles Ramsey vows

to find whoever has been slashing tires around the city, saying, “There’s some idiot somewhere bragging about it.” “Am not,” says Rendell.

[ + 1] An offshoot of Occupy Philadelphia plans a

summit this summer near Independence Hall to make a list of grievances to be presented to the president, Congress and the Supreme Court. First item: “We stink.

Anything that can be done about that?”

[ + 1] If their petition — which will call for the

overturning of the Citizens United court ruling, among other things — is not acted on within 100 days, the group plans to run its own candidates in 2014. “That’s it?” says Rendell. “I thought we were gonna, like, blow something up. Pussies.”

This week’s total: -5 | Last week’s total: -8

MEET THE NEIGHBORS: Captain Charles Vogt has made showing up at community events in this fractured neighborhood an early priority.

NEAL SANTOS

[ safety ]

THE CAPTAIN OF KENSINGTON The troubled 24th District’s new top cop, Charles Vogt, has a great deal of energy — and a tough road ahead. By Isaiah Thompson

A

few weeks ago, Charles Vogt was handed a promotion — along with a heaping pile of problems.

Vogt now commands the city’s 24th Police District, one of the most troubled in the city. The district, which encompasses Port Richmond and stretches west across the El tracks into Kensington and north into Juniata, tied with the 39th District for third-most gunshot victims in 2011 — both shy only of the 22nd District “badlands” in North Philly and of the 25th District, which sits right next door and encompasses the drug-ridden streets of West Kensington, Hunting Park and Fairhill.

Vogt’s new district is home to the infamous stretch of Kensington Avenue known for its open-air drug dealing, prostitution and drug use. At the intersection of Kensington and Somerset, addicts sell needles and point users to dealing locations. Up the street is McPherson Square — known as “Needle Park” — which community members have been trying to take back from drug users.

The district has seen more than its fair share of internal police turmoil as well: Just three years ago, a fresh new captain, Daniel Castro, took the helm, promising to bring energy and smarter polic-

ing to the district — only to be indicted last year on bribery and extortion charges. He eventually pleaded guilty to lesser charges and was sentenced to five years in prison.

But if anyone was made for the job of taking over the troubled area, it just might be Vogt. He grew up there, for one thing, playing in McPherson Square: “When I was in grade school there, we used to sled down the hill and out onto the street,” he recalls. His 78-year-old mother still lives in the district. What’s more, Vogt has at least one unusual qualification for a high-ranking policeman: In addition to a small mountain of training certificates, he holds a master’s in business administration — a tool he says he will apply directly to the “business” of policing.

In just a few weeks, Vogt has inspired a level of enthusiasm the district hasn’t seen in a while. He’s been attending a slew of public meetings, often to neighbors’ surprised delight. When he stopped by a gathering of the McPherson Square Revitalization Coalition, participants were visibly moved.

“He’s making the rounds,” says First District Councilman Mark Squilla. Councilwoman Maria Quiñones-Sánchez, who has been pushing Police Commissioner Charles Ramsey for a new approach to taking on drug activity, is likewise pleased. “We felt very strongly that we wanted to have someone who would look at the situation with fresh eyes,” she says, “and Captain Vogt brings in new energy.”

Sánchez has since helped Vogt secure new bicycles.

Philadelphia invests its police captains with tremendous author-

The district is known for its drug markets.

>>> continued on page 8

the naked city

[ a million stories ]

✚ CLASS WARFARE “Class,” City Council President Darrell Clarke admitted at a committee hearing Tuesday, “was probably not a good choice of words” to include in a plan to create a North Central Neighborhood Improvement District (NID) in the vicinity of Temple University. “Class” had referred to classifications of NID directors — not to, say, classes of residents of the area, which has seen endemic poverty and crime run up against typical townand-gown issues as Temple has outgrown its old commuter-school status. Nevertheless Clarke declared it would be edited out, along with another “inflammatory” word: “power.” As in, the power to acquire or develop property, or to impose liens.

It goes to show how sensitive conversations about which class of people holds the power in this North Philly neighborhood have become. “There’s a general disrespect of the homeowners,” complained Judith Robinson, a neighborhood activist.

Clarke envisioned the NID as a booster shot for the area economy, taxing commercial properties in return for public safety, cleaning and other services. Many landlords and developers say it’s critical to their investments — and they’re willing to pay to support it.

But some residents of the neighborhood told Council’s Rules Committee they see the NID as an avenue to taxing them, or even acquiring their properties by eminent domain.At the least, many see it as the city turning over power to Temple and area landlords — the very entities neighbors complain about.

Lessie Drummond, who owns two rental properties in North Central, complained that the plan to avoid levying NID taxes on single-family owner-occupied homes — even if meant as a concession to residents — had the opposite effect: It has disenfranchised

them and left them out of the process. “We need help,” she insist-

ed, “but we do not need to be controlled.”

—Samantha Melamed

✚ BACK IN THE SADDLE In his recent budget address, Mayor Michael Nutter reiterated his pledge to put 120 more policemen on foot patrols throughout Philly’s “most violent districts.”

Across the city’s violent and less-violent districts, though, there’s a clamoring not for foot beats, but for pedal-powered patrols. At a recent meeting in Northern Liberties, residents asked Councilman Mark Squilla how they could get more bike cops. “Would donations help?” someone wondered. Districts do take donations, through an account at Bustleton Bikes. The issue, Squilla says, is “people who donate bikes or funds tend to want the bikes in their area.”

But the truth is, the problem isn’t getting bikes — it’s training officers to ride them, which apparently is harder than it looks.

Up until now, trainings were conducted sporadically by the Narcotics Strike Force. Now, that duty is shifting to the Police Academy, which will host four or five sessions per year, according to Deputy Commissioner Kevin Bethel. “Everyone wants to be trained, but there are limitations on the number of officers we can train and limitations on the need,” he says.

But clearly there’s a need going unfulfilled. In the Sixth District (where resources are so crunched that some holding cells were recently converted to offices), four officers have been assigned to late-night Old City bike patrol since December — but they’re still waiting to be trained to ride, according to Captain Brian Korn. In the meantime, just as with Nutter’s promised new recruits, they’re on foot.

—Samantha Melamed >>> continued on page 8

photostream ³ submit to photostream@citypaper.net

TONY BORIS FLICKR: LUXELIGHT

By Daniel Denvir

TAX EVASION ³ ONCE PROPERTY-TAX reassessments are

completed this year, Philadelphians will end up paying out an estimated $90 million more altogether.

The tax reform, which Mayor Michael Nutter insisted in his budget address is not a tax hike,“isn’t the easiest, most popular reform that we could have taken on,” he conceded. But it might not be the hardest.

After all, wealthy nonprofits like the University of Pennsylvania will pay somewhere between little and nothing to the city this year — and Nutter, despite Philly’s desperate financial straits, seems content to let them do so.

While property owned by nonprofits is tax exempt by law, many universities and hospitals contribute “payments in lieu of taxes,” or PILOTs, to host cities: Baltimore, in recent years, has received $5.4 million in PILOT dollars annually, Boston $17.4 million.

Not in Philly, though we have more tax-exempt land (by value) than any major city, an estimated 10.8 percent in 2006. Here, nonprofits contribute less than $500,000 per year, collectively. None of the city’s wealthiest nonprofits — Penn, the Hospital of the University of Pennsylvania, Drexel, Thomas Jefferson University Hospital — donates anything. The largest donor by far was, God bless them, Cathedral Village retirement community in Roxborough, which paid $272,500 last year.

Penn (which has a $6.58 billion endowment ) and Columbia are the only Ivies to pay no PILOTs. This year, Yale alone will pay New Haven $8.1 million.

It wasn’t always like this. In 1996, Philly took in nearly $9 million from PILOTs. All the big dogs participated, while smaller nonprofits were exempted.

Nutter’s spokesman, Mark McDonald, blames the decline in PILOTs on Act 55 of 1997, which defanged the threat of revoking tax-exempt status.

But other sticks do exist: In 2009, Pittsburgh universities agreed to contribute $5 million more after Mayor Luke Ravenstahl threatened to tax tuition payments. Meanwhile, PILOT-rich Boston offered carrots: The city sold nonprofits on the social benefits, and a commission representing wealthy institutions in 2010 agreed to pay 25 percent of their real property-tax rate.

Penn, like other nonprofits, provides services — but to a privileged student body. Residents of one of the country’s poorest cities subsidize that education. The exemption disproportionately subsidizes nonprofits with great land wealth instead of those that provide the greatest service. Penn provides enormous benefits to the entire region, state and country. Yet Philadelphia carries the burden. ✚ Send feedback to daniel.denvir@citypaper.net

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Untitled. (Tibetan Uprising Day, Independence Mall, March 10, 2012)

hostilewitness

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[ wasn’t always like this ]

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✚ The Captain of Kensington

UY. OP. B K. SH THIN

AL LOC

[ the naked city ]

<<< continued from page 6

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tantamount to being the police chief of a mid-size city.â&#x20AC;? ity over their districts. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tantamount to being the police chief of a small to mid-sized city,â&#x20AC;? says Deputy Police Commissioner Richard Ross. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The flip side is theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re responsible for what happens.â&#x20AC;?

Vogt, clearly, is eager to get started. And heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s made equally clear his intention to immediately take on the open-air drug dealing that has so unfortunately branded the area. Specifically, heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s assigning new beats to the most visible sites of drug dealing and prostitution (which, he says, both fuels and is fueled by dealing and other related crimes). Heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s putting officers through bicycle training to increase the bike-cop presence, and says heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll implement a foot patrol in the area, in addition to an additional tactical unit and plainclothes unit.

Asked why such measures hadnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t already been taken, Vogt admits: â&#x20AC;&#x153;I think police commanders can get a little [reactive] in responding. â&#x20AC;Ś And when weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re chasing dots on a map, we neglect the quality-of-life issuesâ&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x201D; especially, he says, in areas where residents donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t call the police. â&#x20AC;&#x153;If thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no calls, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no dots. But Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m putting the officers there before thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dots.â&#x20AC;?

Vogt says a gradual crackdown on illegal activi-

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ties beneath the El is underway (one drug user with whom CP spoke agreed), and will ramp up in coming weeks. â&#x20AC;&#x153;My goal,â&#x20AC;? he says, â&#x20AC;&#x153;is to clean it up, put a police presence there, and hold our ground.â&#x20AC;?

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s an approach centered less around sweeps than a strategic public presence, one that many community members seem to welcome. Less thrilled, Vogt admits, are some (some, he emphasizes) of the 170-odd officers he commands. But â&#x20AC;&#x153;the fact of the matter,â&#x20AC;? he says, â&#x20AC;&#x153;is I have a vision, and theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re going to have to get on board.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;The vision,â&#x20AC;? he adds, â&#x20AC;&#x153;is proactive policing. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s going out and working eight hours a day. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s interacting with the community in a positive, professional manner. And itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s getting the job done.â&#x20AC;?

Those, of course, are still just words for now â&#x20AC;&#x201D; but residents seem to like how they sound. (isaiah.thompson@citypaper.net)

â&#x153;&#x161; a million stories <<< continued from page 7

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Now that prisons are costing too much, they turn on unions.â&#x20AC;?

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Gov. Tom Corbett, following a nationwide movement of â&#x20AC;&#x153;Right on Crimeâ&#x20AC;? conservatives in embracing criminal-justice reform, is looking to reduce the stateâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s prison population. Step one: Simply speed the release of people already approved for parole.

The Pennsylvania State Corrections Officers Association has already spoken out against the proposal, while another union, SEIU 1199, critized a plan to outsource prison nursing work.

Both, in turn, received a barrage of criticism from the right, particularly the conservative Commonwealth Foundation.

It appears that conservatives are using prison reform as yet another bludgeon with which to beat up on organized labor in Pennsylvania.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a two-for-one deal: co-opt a longtime liberal issue, and stamp down the unions all at once.

It wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be much of a brawl. Legislative insiders say, after all, that the prison guardsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; union is not very powerful in Harrisburg. And they are generally more focused on working conditions than supporting the prison boom, says Temple University prison historian Heather Ann Thompson.

Conservatives have â&#x20AC;&#x153;had many opportunities to reform laws to end mass incarceration, to improve prison conditions for inmates and to hire sufficient personnel to keep prisons safer and less stressful,â&#x20AC;? says Thompson. â&#x20AC;&#x153;They have done none of this. But now that prisons are costing them too much, they turn on unions.â&#x20AC;?

The Commonwealth Foundation, its proclivity for opportunistic union-bashing notwithstanding, says it is eager to work with progressives on prison reform. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Funding positive results, not just punishments, is a policy that should be universally supported,â&#x20AC;?

Commonwealthâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s director of public affairs, Jay Ostrich, tells City Paper. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Through bipartisan cooperation â&#x20AC;Ś prison populations can be significantly reduced without compromising public safety.â&#x20AC;?

Compromising the unions

that keep those prisons running is a different matter. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Daniel Denvir

the naked city

Temple Universityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Fox School of Business in partnership with the Project Management Institute (PMI) will offer Project Management Professional certification classes beginning March 20th. PMI Certification is appropriate for managers of all education and skill levels.

Classes are held in the evening at Temple Universityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Center City campus. Registration is online.

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POWER OF CERTIFICATION

DISCOVER THE POWER OF FOX www.fox.temple.edu/PMI 215-204-8152

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a&e

artsmusicmoviesmayhem

icepack

By A.D. Amorosi

³ WITH A NEW steakhouse (Reserve), the Arden

planning a new arts center (a March 22 press conference will reveal all), Stephen Starr making over the currently closed Tangerine space and the Berley Brothers’ Letitia Street monopoly of The Franklin Fountain and Shane Confectionery, Old City is moving toward changing its rep. Still, the dumbheaded rabble persists in bringing knives to bars, and that’s a problem. One idea for reformation: Get rid of Recess.An after-hours snake pit with O.C.’s diabolically loutish crowds at full frenzy? That’s like introducing my pals “gasoline can” and “flamethrower.” I love after-hours everything — even ran some back in the day, two in Old City. I don’t get going until after midnight. But there’s something combustible about giving an already juiced-up crowd even more time to get oiled. And Recess?

We don’t want you to close. Just get out of the line of fire. ³ “The transition from being a journalist to a musician is a fairly seamless one,” says Jessica Bautista, a reporter for the Gloucester County Times whose noise-pop ensemble Sinking Ocean Gods headlines the Troc’s Balcony March 21. “As both a print media reporter and a local drummer, I make no money and I make no money.” She goes on to paint a pretty humorous picture of that duality by discussing the hours of toil to meet deadlines only to “walk onstage and forget your political correctness, cast your worries of being sued for libel aside, and proceed to be judged by a swarm of faces while you’re sweating and hitting circles with sticks, praying that one person out there isn’t making Good Charlotte comparisons. It’s actually pretty neat.”

Sinking Ocean Gods is actually pretty neat, too. ³ Now that occasionally unfriendly but always knowledgeable cocktail-shakers and fiancés Phoebe Esmon and Christian Gaal have left Farmers’ Cabinet, a longtime rumor has resurfaced: Is the ink really dry on the Farmers’ Cabinet takeover of the Frank Furness building that once housed The Bank and Transit — a spot that was planned to become a brewery, beer hall and tiki bar, with a drink menu designed by Esmon and Gaal? We keep hearing rumors that not everything is swimming on Sixth and Spring Garden. ³ Vince Valentine, the local comic renowned (or possibly notorious) for the Philly iteration of the Rob Becker one-man show Defending the Caveman,will test out his own upcoming Prince Music Theater solo show (April 18-May 13) with an excerpt on March 19 when he opens for pianist ELEW at Loews Hotel.³ Avram Hornik’s 4 Corners Management has been hyping an opening (though no date yet) for Ortlieb’s Lounge (Jazzhaus no longer) on N. Third. It’ll host live music, open mics and comedians. Honk. ³ Ice gets illustrated at citypaper.net/icepack. (a_amorosi@citypaper.net)

PEN PALS: Lamb 62, left, is the one who’ll be seen onstage in the Wilma’s Curse of the Starving Class. The fussier 54 was demoted to understudy for “constantly baaing.” Stagehand Elliot Greer, left, and actor Nate Miller are part of their “surrogate herd.”

NEAL SANTOS

show+tell

By Emily Guendelsberger

ACTING CHOPS LAMBS 54, 61 AND 62 | Pen in back of Wilma Theater

³ A MONTH-OLD lamb with an ear tag reading 1062 is gently but

persistently gumming this writer’s shoes in a large, straw-filled, chain-link enclosure around the back of the Wilma Theater.

“When we used 61 onstage, she squeezed out of the cage,” says stagehand and temporary shepherd Elliot Greer. Then he gestures at one with an ear tag marked 1054, smiling. “And she was just constantly baaing.” So the spotlight fell to lamb 62, who Greer says is “quieter, calmer and the laziest.” She’ll be the one audiences coo over during the Wilma’s run of Curse of the Starving Class.

This is not to say 62 is a particularly good actress — just less of a scene-stealer. When the play opened March 7, the three adoptive sisters had been alive for only about four weeks, and you can’t house-train even adult sheep, much less teach an infant to keep quiet during a monologue. All the Wilma’s cast and crew could do was cast the calmest lamb, hope she doesn’t act so cute she detracts from the humans onstage and practice staying in character while cleaning up poop.

Sam Shepard’s Starving Class is a difficult play — in addition to its dark themes and full-frontal nudity, there’s also the out-of-the-

ordinary stage direction that a live lamb be present in multiple scenes. This leads to complications both obvious and less so: The short sheeping season combined with how quickly lambs grow means that the play can only be done with a real lamb in a pretty brief window in early spring, and you need to find your animal actor fast.

Lambs 54, 61 and 62 were found with the help of a 4-H Club based outside Roxborough. As sometimes happens, their mothers gave birth to more lambs than they could feed — 61 and 62 came from a set of triplets and 54 from a set of twins — and, says production manager Clayton Tejada, the three would have had to be bottle-fed wherever they were. They came to the Wilma at two weeks old; after the play closes April 8, they’ll return to the farm, where each will be assigned to a Philly-area kid who’ll raise and show her.

The lambs have names, recently chosen via Facebook contest — Lady Bahbah, Justin Sheeper and Bahnka Zizbah (after Wilma artistic director Blanka Zizka) — but the crew is used to referring to them by their ear tags. Though this may read as a bit clinical, they clearly adore their charges.

But while adorable, sheep aren’t standard pets — as full-grown ewes, they’ll be between 130 and 180 pounds, and as long-domesticated herd animals, their behavior and instincts aren’t very familiar to someone used to a dog or cat, “who are not so lazy, and are

Practice staying in character while cleaning up poop.

>>> continued on page 14

the naked city | feature

[ gauche, heedless euphoria ] ³ local/folk/rock

A cynic could say We All Raise Our Voices to the Air (Live Songs 04.11-08.11) (Capitol) is The Decemberists’ attempt at a quick cash-in following last year’s crossover smash hit, The King Is Dead, their first No. 1 record in this juiceball Billboard era. An optimist might call this spirited collection of 20 oeuvre-spanning live tracks a quick little primer to get all those new fans caught up. The realists are sitting this one out.

—Patrick Rapa

The meanest thing you could call Philly’s Good Old War is innocuous, which is pretty damning, but thankfully not the prevailing vibe on the new Come Back as Rain (Sargent House). But this stuff is relentlessly amiable, smooth and soft around the edges, the kind of pretty folk you don’t hear much of these days. The guitars are acoustic, the beats are peppy, the lyrics are sincere and the harmonies are three-part.

—Patrick Rapa

³ art/pop/ambient Conversant with both classical (her training) and pop (her audience), but beholden to the conventions of neither, Julia Holter’s music feels airy and lucid on the surface but maintains a deeply obscure, unfathomable interior. Ekstasis (Rvng Intl), the fast-rising California art star’s second album, paradoxically pairs a twinkling, glassy beauty not unlike plenty of recent, bedroom fabrications (pillowy synths, perfunctory machine percussion and ethereal, glossolalic swirls and clusters of vocals) — plus a few sparingly ornate touches (harpsichord, timpani) — with an utterly chilly, dead-eyed post-punk austerity.

—K. Ross Hoffman

flickpick

³ electronic Coming from Scuba — aka Berlin-viaLondon dubstep maven Paul Rose; bleeding-edge tastemaker behind Hotflush Recordings (Sepalcure, Mount Kimbie, Joy Orbison) — Personality feels downright reactionary, with its fist-pumping forays into progressive trance and surging primetime techno, and a lead single (“The Hope”) brazenly evoking the electro-shlock of Calvin Harris’ “Vegas.” If anything, he doesn’t go far enough: Rose’s well-honed instinct for sophisticated restraint — and his still-palpable dark, dubby fingerprints — leave these tracks feeling a little, well, impersonal, stopping short of the gauche, heedless euphoria to which they aspire.

—K. Ross Hoffman

[ movie review ]

CASA DE MI PADRE

The real villains lie north of the border.

RISE AGAIN ³ OF ALL THE performers who led the spokenword renaissance of the early 1990s, Henry Rollins wasn’t necessarily the one you’d have picked to stick around. His intensity was unsustainable, his focus scattered. When Maggie Estep and Reg E. Gaines seemed to spend all their time on coffeehouse stages, Rollins was also juggling books, indie films and Rollins Band CDs. But while his ’90s peers have changed career paths or gone deep underground, Rollins is as busy as ever, with a steady diet of acting, blogging and publishing. And somehow he maintains a weekly DJ gig on L.A.’s KCRW while touring with his spoken-word performances.

The Boxed Life (1993) was hardly Rollins’ first spoken-word release, but it marked a turning point; for the first time, significant segments of his audience didn’t think of him primarily as Black Flag’s old singer. Considering all the random things Rollins riffs on, in snippets of shows recorded from 1989 to 1992, The Boxed Life has aged fairly well. A few pieces are dated, even if you came of age in the ’80s: One bit on Bartles & Jaymes is baffling and another on cults recruiting at airports is stale; a rant against Edie Brickell sounds like overkill until you remember how inescapable “What I Am” was.

But other pieces show a man adept at two modes: the angry, aging punk who speaks his mind and the standup armed with punch lines on air travel and the battle between the sexes. Here’s Rollins on United Airlines’ old slogan, “Flying the friendly skies”: “It’s like United has their own set of skies.

‘We only fly in the friendly parts. That’s why we will not go to Philadelphia International Airport.’” On men who claim they’re feminists: “Old people don’t know a fuckin’ thing about being young and men don’t know a fuckin’ thing about being a woman.”

Longer stories about the disposal of lab animals and condoms aren’t for the squeamish, but pay off with big laughs and life lessons.

And unlike certain other angry white guys from the ’90s (read: Limbaugh, Gingrich), recent evidence shows Rollins’ POV is still evolving. (m_fine@citypaper.net)

✚ Henry Rollins

The Boxed Life (IMAGO)

11

PAPI A CAP IN YO ASS: Starring Will Ferrell as the misfit son of a Mexican rancher, Matt Piedmont’s silly mock-telenova revels in its ridiculousness.

M.J. Fine does it again

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[ B ] FILMED IN “MEXICOSCOPE,” Will Ferrell’s Spanish-speaking debut casts the pale-skinned gringo as the misfit son of a Mexican rancher (Pedro Armendáriz Jr.).

Ferrell’s ethnic mismatch is acknowledged only peripherally, which may be the only joke that Casa de Mi Padre underplays. Director Matt Piedmont and writer Andrew Steele, both colleagues from Ferrell’s Saturday Night Live days, milk the low production values of their mock-telenovela for all they’re worth, flaunting their wooden horses and papier-mâché sets — a gag that by the end of the movie’s brief running time is stretched so thin it’s practically transparent. The scratched film stock and misaligned lenses evoke the genre simulacra of Grindhouse, but without an aficionado’s depth. The off-the-shelf plot pits Ferrell’s prodigal brother Diego Luna, an aspiring drug lord whom their father sees as the more accomplished of the two, against kingpin Gael García Bernal, with Ferrell’s amiable lunkhead as unwitting accomplice and Luna’s fiancée Genesis Rodriguez as the bonus prize. The overqualified cast doesn’t dovetail with the movie’s threadbare aesthetic, but they play it straight, never acknowledging the walls might topple at any moment. As a menacing DEA agent, Nick Offerman at least gets to go to town, establishing that the real villains lie north of the border.

Casa de Mi Padre proceeds from an audacious premise, but the movie consistently lowers the stakes; it starts as a conceptual art project, and ends as a foreign-language Top Secret! A near-death vision tips its hat to Alejandro Jodorowsky’s The Holy Mountain, but offsets the highbrow reference with a moth-eaten white tiger guiding Ferrell through the spirit world. “If you were truly smart,” Ferrell’s father tells him, “you’d know that you are dumb.” Casa de Mi Padre knows just how dumb it is. —Sam Adams

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✚ Acting Chops

<<< continued from page 10

No worries about carrying around the sharp-hooved lamb completely naked. smarter,” says Greer. “These guys — they eat, and they graze, and then they lie down. They have no defense mechanisms.”

It’s clear from hanging out with them even for a few minutes how different these animals are from anything descended from hunters. They aren’t wary. If you offer them a hand to sniff like you would a dog, they look at you blankly. They don’t just submit to being picked up by strangers, they seem to enjoy it. The animals are so docile that actor Nate Miller has zero worries about a scene late in the play where he carries around the 15pound, sharp-hooved 62 while completely naked.

“They like being held,” he says. “Once you pick it up, it calms down. It’s not trying to buck or nip.”

Herd animals hate being alone, and this is why there are three lambs — to keep each other company. Before it became clear who was going to be most comfortable in the spotlight, the plan was to rotate them in, with the two benched lambs together backstage and the third onstage with her “surrogate herd” of Greer, Miller and a few other humans in plain view to keep her from getting scared. Greer, in particular, has spent a lot of time

[ arts & entertainment ]

with the lambs, bottle-feeding them every eight hours, and has bonded with them to the point where “he doesn’t even have to pick the lamb up to go to the stage anymore,” says Tejada. “He just walks down the hall into the elevator and she goes with him.”

I visited the day after 62’s debut at a preview performance, which everyone agrees went well. The lamb didn’t seem to mind the audience, though she could definitely see and hear them. “When she baaed for the first time, 300 people all at once went ‘Awww!’” Miller clasps his hands and makes an adoring coo. All three lambs look up at the noise, then, unconcerned, resume toothlessly nibbling hay and the cuffs of my pants. “She definitely noticed that.” (emilyg@citypaper.net) ✚ Know an object with an interesting

story that’s perfect for Show + Tell?

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Natural Selection

NEW 21 JUMP STREET Read Drew Lazor’s review at citypaper.net/movies. (Pearl, Rave, UA 69th Street, UA Riverview)

CASA DE MI PADRE|B Read Sam Adams’ review on pg. 11. (UA Riverview)

JEFF, WHO LIVES AT HOME

SEEKING JUSTICE Read Shaun Brady’s review at citypaper.net/movies. (UA Riverview)

ISRAELI FILM FESTIVAL RESTORATION|B+ Yossi Madmoni’s second full-length project tells a Sundancewinning tale of an aging father whose furniture restoration shop is threatened after the sudden death of his partner. The plot is propelled by engaging elements like a strained fatherson relationship, hints at infidelity and the introduction of a “possible savior.” But a sluggish pace and too many loose ends detract from the overall flow. Sometimes the tie-it-up-with-

COLUMBIA PICTURES AND METRO-GOLDWYN-MAYER PICTURES PRESENT IN ASSOCIATION WITH RELATIVITY MEDIA AN ORIGINAL FILM/CANNELL STUDIOS PRODUCTION “21 JUMP STREET” BRIE LARSON DAVE FRANCO ROB RIGGLE EXECUTIVE WITH ICE CUBE MUSICBY MARK MOTHERSBAUGH PRODUCERS JONAHSTORYHILL CHANNING TATUM EZRA SWERDLOW TANIA LANDAU BASED ON THE TELEVISION SCREENPLAY SERIES CREATED BY PATRICK HASBURGH & STEPHEN J. CANNELL BY MICHAEL BACALL & JONAH HILL

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17

Read Drew Lazor’s review at citypaper.net/movies. (Ritz East)

It’s about time someone made an independent film in which working-class Christians from the Midwest are portrayed as pathetic, deluded slobs who are mainly in need of a good lay. After a sexless couple of decades with her husband John Diehl, bedraggled Rachael Harris discovers he’s been getting his rocks off at the local sperm bank after he suffers a heart attack during a particularly energetic wank. Left sterile by an out-of-wedlock abortion, she develops the notion that the product of her husband’s wayward spunk is some kind of kin, and tracks him down in trailer-park Florida. Matt O’Leary, who unbeknownst to her is an escaped jailbird, cares not about his “bilateral father,” but the crazed woman who shows up at his door seems like an easy mark and a handy way for him to stay a step ahead of the law. Harris, a veteran comedian, dials down the schtick, but it still feels like she’s slumming it, using the character’s inverse glamor as a calling card for “serious acting.” —S.A. (Ritz at the Bourse)

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BEING FLYNN|B While phoned-in junk like Killer Elite and the forthcoming Red Lights still prevails, the last few years have seen a welcome uptick in fully committed Robert De Niro performances, and Being Flynn houses the best of the bunch.

As the schizophrenic absentee father of would-be novelist Nick Flynn (Paul Dano), he introduces us to the character’s mental illness slowly, almost seductively. That he drives a cab while spewing racist garbage in voiceover is a relic of Flynn’s book, Another Bullshit Night in Suck City, but the resonance with De Niro’s signature role is a fringe benefit, letting the audience settle into a familiar framework before it crumbles to bits. Dano, who takes a job at a homeless shelter to subsidize his stalled writing career, hasn’t seen his father in years; flashbacks recall only the period when he was raised by single mom Julianne Moore. So when his father turns up, first as a fitful presence and then as one of the shelter’s guests, it’s an unwelcome reunion, churning up long-buried memories and pushing him toward a needed confrontation. The how-I-became-a-writer stuff is rote, but De Niro and Dano bring enough to give the script’s well-worn setups new life. —Sam Adams (Ritz East)

NATURAL SELECTION|C+

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a-bow ending is exactly why we turn to cinema. You don’t get that here. A definitive story develops, but in the end we’re left asking too many questions.

What it does succeed in doing, however, is offering a believable portrayal of a man confronting mortality, grasping what dwindling hope remains in his conflict-ridden world. —Courtney Sexton (Edmond D. Bossone Research Enterprise Center, Drexel University)

✚ REPERTORY FILM THE BALCONY The Trocadero, 1003 Arch St., 215-

922-6888, thetroc.com. Battle Royale (2011, Japan, 103 min.): A class of teenagers is forced to fight to the death by a fearful government. Mon., March 19, 7 p.m., $3.

BRYN MAWR FILM INSTITUTE 824 W. Lancaster Ave., Bryn Mawr, 610-527-9898, brynmawrfilm.org.

Dogtooth (2009, Greece, 94 min.): Overprotective parents keep their teenage children trapped on their property in this surreal family drama. Fri., March 16, 11:30 p.m., $7. The Screen Illusion (2010, France, 88 min.): An intrepid private eye tracks down a wealthy man’s son in this modern ad-

aptation of a 17th-century French play.

Sat., March 17, 11 a.m., $7.

CHESTNUT HILL FILM GROUP Free Library, Chestnut Hill Branch, 8711 Germantown Ave., 215-2480977, armcinema25.com. Dick Tracy Meets Gruesome (1947, U.S., 65 min.), which stars Boris Karloff squaring off against the yellow-suited comic-book gumshoe, opens the Secret Cinema’s B-movie double feature.

Then, police hunt down “the Creeper,” a disfigured man seeking vengeance, in The Brute Man (1946, U.S., 58 min.). Tue., March 20, 7:30 p.m., free.

COLONIAL THEATRE

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‘‘

that is funny, tender and ultimately moving.’’

SCREENDAILY, Mark Adams

227 Bridge St., Phoenixville, 610-9171228, thecolonialtheatre.com. Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure (1989, U.S., 90 min.): “Party on, dudes.” Fri., March 16, 9:45 p.m., $8. The Man Who Would Be King (1975, U.K., 129 min.): Sean Connery and Michael Caine play Brits who quickly become exploitative colonialists. Sun., March 18, 2 p.m., $8. The Art of the Steal (2009, U.S., 101 min.): Spoiler alert: This doc on the Barnes Foundation’s move to Philly ends with ceaseless construction on the Parkway. Sun., March 18, 4:30 p.m., $8.

COUNTY THEATER 20 E. State St., Doylestown, 215-3456789, countytheater.org. Resurrect Dead: The Mystery of the

Toynbee Tiles (2011, U.S., 88 min.):

This Sundance-winning doc searches for the source of the cryptic tiles sprinkled across Philadelphia. Wed., March 21, 7:30 p.m., $9.75.

INTERNATIONAL HOUSE 3701 Chestnut St., 267-765-9700, ihousephilly.org. Maluala (1979, Cuba, 80 min.): A community of runaway slaves is threatened by agents of the Catholic Church. Thu., March 15, 7 p.m., free. Italy, Love It or Leave It (2011, Italy, 75 min.): Filmmakers Gustav Hofer and Luca Ragazzi play versions of themselves trying to make sense of Italy’s uncertain future in a hybrid documentary/road movie.

Fri., March 16, 5 p.m., free. DoggieWoggiez! PoochieWoochiez!

(2012, U.S., 110 min.): Video collective Everything Is Terrible! crafts a movie entirely from canine-related found footage. Mon., March 19, 7 p.m., $9.

Le Million (1931, France, 81 min.): A Chaplin-esque starving artist hunts down the missing jacket containing his winning lottery ticket. Wed., March 21, 7 p.m., free.

NOMAD PIZZA 611 S. 7th St., 215-238-0900, nomadpizzaco.com. Cinema Paradiso (1988, Italy, 123 min.): Unless you’re totally heartless, this Italian tribute to movies will definitely leave you crying. Sun., March 18, 8 p.m., free. Annie Hall (1977, U.S., 133 min.): Woody Allen reinvented the rom-com with this tale about a neurotic Brooklynite and his tightly wound WASP girlfriend (Diane Keaton). Wed., March 21, 8:30 p.m., free.

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18 | P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R |

JESSICA HENDERSON,

“A rapid-fire crowd-pleaser.”

1/2

Indelibly funny…the cast could not be better.”

PETER TRAVERS,

All of the above.

PHILADELPHIA JEWISH FILM FESTIVAL Various locations, 215-545-4400, gershmany.org. To Save a Life (2012, U.S., 62 min.): This nonfiction flick tells the story of a Philadelphia couple who traveled to Vienna and saved 50 Jewish children from likely death.

Sat., March 17, 8:30 p.m., $12. The Rabbi’s Cat (2011, France, 100 min.): An Algerian rabbi’s cat gains the ability to speak after swallowing a parrot in this charming animated flick. Sun., March 18, 3 p.m., $10. Paul Goodman Changed My Life (2011, U.S., 89 min.): The legacy of famous author and experimental psychoanalyst Paul Goodman is explored in this doc. Sun., March 18, 7 p.m., $10. Reuniting the Rubins (2010, U.K., 97 min.): An uptight London lawyer is guilted into reuniting with his estranged children by his ill mother. Mon., March 19, 7 p.m., $10.

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Temple MFA grad Aggie Ebrahimi Bazaz explores the Iranian Revolution through her family’s history in Inheritance (2011, U.S., 29 min.), while Ambarien Al Qadar’s The Ghetto Girl (2011, U.S., 35 min.) follows a girl searching for a lost home movie in New Delhi’s largest Muslim community. Thu., March 15, 5 p.m. filmmakers’ reception, 6 p.m. screening, free.

Annenberg Hall, Temple University, 2020 N. 13th St., room three, 215-2048422. Kanal (1957, Poland, 91 min.): The Polish resistance takes its antiNazi fight to the Warsaw sewers. Fri., March 16, 3 p.m., free.

3260 South St., 215-746-4174, penn.

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508 S. Fifth St., 215-413-0999, woodenshoebooks.com. The Quiet Earth (1985, New Zealand, 91 min.): After single-handedly wiping out most of humanity, a scientist joins forces with a Maori and a redhead in order to survive. Sun., March 18, 7 p.m., free.

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THIS FILM IS RATED PG-13 PARENTS STRONGLY CAUTIONED. SOME MATERIAL MAY BE INAPPROPRIATE FOR CHILDREN UNDER 13 Please note: Passes received through this promotion do not guarantee you a seat at the theatre. Seating is on a first come, first served basis, except for membersof the reviewing press. Theatre is overbooked to ensure a full house. No admittance once screening has begun.

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Le Virtù Soup Ingredients 3 MEATS: 1/4 pound diced guanciale 1 prosciutto butt 1/4 pound loose sausage (formed into little meatballs) 3 VEGETABLES: 1 carrot, diced 1 onion, diced 2 ribs celery, diced 3 BEANS: 1/4 cup brown lentils (Umbrian work best) 1/4 cup cannellini beans 1/4 cup borlotti beans 3 HERBS: 1 sprig rosemary, minced 1 sprig thyme, minced 1 sprig sage, minced 3 LIQUIDS: 1/4 cup white wine 2 quarts chicken stock 2 quarts water 3 SEASONINGS: Salt to taste Pepper to taste 3 bay leaves 3 PASTAS: 1/4 cup ditalini 1/4 cup broken spaghetti 1/4 cup broken fettuccine

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Directions In a large pot, sweat the guanciale over medium heat in a little olive oil to render its fat. Brown slightly and add the vegetables. Sweat the veggies over low heat until translucent. Add the white wine and reduce by half. Add the chicken stock, water, beans, herbs, seasonings and the other meats. Simmer over low heat until the beans are tender. Add water if needed to continue cooking beans. Add pastas and cook until al dente. Garnish with pecorino cheese and a drizzle of extra virgin olive oil. Serves six.

Le virtù soup features dozens of distinct ingredients.

South Philly restaurant Le Virtù takes its name from a traditional Abruzzese soup made to commemorate the arrival of spring.

springcleaning,abruzzostyle Empty your pantry to create a truly virtuous springtime soup.

Words by Adam Erace | Photos by Neal Santos

IN ABRUZZO, winter attacks from both land and sea.

Situated in Italy’s rocky heart, the Eastern-Central region scales the Apennine Mountains before spilling into the Adriatic. It even has its own “Little Tibet,” the nickname for Il Campo Imperatore, a snowdraped Alpine meadow home to one of Europe’s oldest ski resorts.

In the 14th century, peasants in the province of Teramo weren’t celebrating the snows on skis. Winter was long, hard and fraught with danger and death. Those who survived the season rejoiced by putting on a pot of le virtù, a celebratory soup that’s still made today. “[Le virtù] is made on the first of May, when winter should be sufficiently at the backs of Teramo’s farmers and villagers,” explains Francis Cratil Cretarola, who owns the East Passyunk restaurant named for the soup with his brother, Fred, and wife, Cathy Lee. “Making this elaborate dish was an act of celebration and defiance.

They’d survived another winter and all the discomfort, sickness and deprivation associated with that season.”

For the annual rite, Abruzzese house-

wives perform a cathartic clearing of pantries and cupboards, dispatching the leftover dry goods accumulated during the winter. Various pastas (tortellini, ditalini), beans (cannellini, borlotti) harvested and dried in high summer, as well as cured meats like salami, pancetta and pig’s ears, might make appearances in le virtù. It all depends on what’s on hand, and it all lands traditionally in a community cauldron tended to by the most “virtuous” girls in each village.

Like the snowflakes that blanket Abruzzo’s peaks, no two virtùs are alike.

One main tradition-within-the-tradition is arranging ingredients into groups of seven, a sacred number for Catholics: seven beans, seven pastas, seven meats.

“Some people rigidly hew to the importance of the number seven. Many, however, do not,” says Cretarola. “There are almost as many recipes for [le virtù] as there are families who make it.”

This is due, in part, to the dish’s components being contingent on what was left over after winter. Back then, these ingredients were difficult to predict, so even within individual families, “the dish could change from year to year.”

Le Virtù chef Joe Cicala makes his version with chickpeas and gigante beans, porchetta scraps and prosciutto

butt, farro and broken spaghetti, brown and green lentils, meatballs, sausage, risotto rice … and dozens more ingredients. The soup isn’t entirely composed of leftovers; the Abruzzese have a longstanding agricultural tradition, so early spring vegetables also wind up in the pot. “The seamless blending together of these dried, cured and fresh ingredients was meant to symbolize and celebrate the seamless transition of the seasons — the continuation of natural, ancient rhythms,” says Cretarola.

Le Virtù will serve its house take on its namesake dish during a special dinner on May 1, but you don’t have to wait that long to try it. Cicala has provided an abridged version for the home cook — the full, 35-ingredient recipe will be available on our Meal Ticket blog (citypaper.net/mealticket), if you’re feeling intrepid. Just remember to share. It’s traditional for Abruzzese to distribute portions from their le virtù pot to relatives, friends and neighbors.

“The failure to share a portion of le virtù could mean the breaking of friendship or a familial bond,” cautions Cretarola. “This tradition continues in full force, even if surviving the winter has lost some of its drama.” (adam.erace@citypaper.net)

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By Adam Erace

food

TIN IT TO WIN IT

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AMERICAN SARDINE BAR | 1801 Federal St., 215334-2337, americansardinebar.com. Kitchen open daily, 11 a.m.-1 a.m.; bar till 2 a.m. nightly. Brunch served Sun., 11 a.m.-5 p.m. Sandwiches, $2-$12; soups, $6; sides, $5-$6.

³ “YOU REVIEWED ME while my arm was

EVAN M. LOPEZ

[ taste buds ]

TONGUE IN CHEEK Philly chefs talk lickers as a gateway drug into offal. By Brion Shreffler

G

citypaper.net

>>> continued on page 28

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rowing up in Northeast Philly, I’d see them sitting in open freezer bins, past the friendly chickens and polite hams: impossibly large beef tongues. I tried to reconcile this sight with the slack-jawed cows I’d seen on country drives before the thought of papillae riled my mind — the spell eventually broken by a Russian émigré scooping one up like it was rib-eye.

“My friend, who loves it, had some where they left the very tip intact. He said it felt like he was hooking up,” says Andrew Gaspar, a line cook at Brauhaus Schmitz, which recently served braised calf’s More on: tongue with pickled apples and horseradish mustard. Don’t let trepidation hold you back: There are many other local restaurants changing minds and palates by treating this delicate, replete-with-fat cut as a gateway into all things offal.

Stop into Prima Pizzeria Taqueria late at night and you might see whole beef tongues being carved up for the day ahead. They resemble grayish children’s playground slides with a meaty base propping them up, three-quarters of each tongue’s calories coming from fat.

Jésus Mozo (whose sister, Alicia, owns Prima) runs the place after 9:30 p.m., while his girlfriend, Paola Sagastume, oversees cooking.

Their tongues reach a sublime state via a three-hour boil blessed

with chipotle, guajillo, coriander, cumin and black peppercorn before being peeled and diced; a 20-minute simmer in their own broth follows. A little onion and cilantro and an embowering tortilla are all that’s needed. Cooking six to 10 at a time in a giant pot, Mozo estimates he goes through upward of 70 tongues a week.

“It’s very much an immigrant cuisine,” says Zahav chef Michael Solomonov. “You’ve got so many cultures who’ve lived in poverty and will eat anything.” Treated right, tongue is delicious, he declares: “You can add great flavors to it by brining and braising, and yet, due to the fat content, it’s really robust.” At Zahav, lamb tongue is poached, peeled and seared over charcoal after a twoweek brine in allspice, sugar, salt, garlic, fennel seeds and caraway.

It’s left with a delicately crisp exterior and a moist, meaty interior — a good starting point for beginners. “People are getting cool about this stuff,” Solomonov says of these cuts. He MORE FOOD AND wasn’t always cool with them himself, sayDRINK COVERAGE ing that the traditional pairing of apricots AT C I T Y P A P E R . N E T / and tongue freaked him out as a kid.

M E A LT I C K E T. The tongue is approachable at Famous 4th Street Delicatessen. There you get a heaping pile on rye that looks suspiciously like corned beef, not counting the telltale dots of silenced taste buds. “Tongue’s a hot property today,” my waitress says, speeding away with my order — hot and with mustard, as she suggested. It gives off an unapologetic fatty flavor that, along with the sheer girth of their sandwiches, makes the deli’s “zaftig” size seem like a stretch, even for two.

As good as the sandwich is, I pursue a second Jewish-deli opinion from someone who cures tongues in-house. Lee Stein of Stein Boys

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broken!?!!?!” came a text from Scott Schroeder, off-color comedian, motorcycle rider and chef of John Longacre’s South Philadelphia Tap Room and, since November, American Sardine Bar. “I haven’t been able to cook for the past three weeks!”

At least two of my visits to Point Breeze’s cigarette-slim Sardine came before the two-wheel spill that shattered Schroeder’s arm in six places. But my latest meal saw sous chef Amanda Smith in command, overstuffing crunchy, buttered and toasted ciabatta with pork belly, snappy watercress and chunky apple mostarda — an instant classic.

For Schroeder, the injury has proven serendipitous. “Because I haven’t had my arm, I can’t be as hands-on,” says the chef, more of a perfectionist than his bawdy Twitter persona (@foodsyoucaneat) suggests. “I’m teaching more.”

Schroeder as Yoda? You bet. Who better to pass on the virtues of razor-sharp execution, confident seasoning and meticulous sourcing without coming across like a tool? Those hallmarks are on display at the Sardine, where the blackboard menu advertises sandwiches, soups and snacks cooked with the precision you’d expect from the guy who, in my opinion, makes the city’s most interesting bar food.

“For Sardine Bar, I didn’t want do 30 things OK,” Schroeder says. “I wanted to do 10 things really well.” One is that pork belly. Two is the creamy split-pea soup with Lancaster bacon. Three (I’ll stop here) is the butternut-squash stew, a Smith joint that sticks to your ribs fiercer than any other vegan recipe in existence.

The only complaint about the food is it can take a while. Fortunately, 16 fountains of liquid distraction alleviate impatience. When food does arrive, it’s worth the delay: The crew gets onion rings perfectly crisp (albeit greasy on one occasion). Brussels fried with oyster sauce, on hiatus till summer, were little fireballs laced with pickled Thai chilies. Velvety, bacon-y tomato sauce enrobed wavy noodles in My Mom’s Tomato Macaroni, something Mrs. Schroeder would make on Saturdays.

Smith does it so well, you’d think she was there for those family get-togethers. Schroeder’s arm might be broken, but the kitchen at American Sardine Bar is anything but. (adam.erace@citypaper.net)

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[ food & drink ]

✚ Tongue in Cheek <<< continued from page 27

Serving the Best Caribbean and American Dishes All Freshly Made

Lunch • Dinner

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233 South Street Philadelphia 215.627.2800

“Leave the expensive stuff that’s crap to the rich,” says Amis chef Brad Spence.

Famous Deli in Northeast Philly starts with a garlicky brine. Stein prefers his tongue cold, either with mustard or as a special with coleslaw and Russian dressing. The tongue is loaded in a meat slicer standing up and sliced tip to back, yielding trapezoidal cuts, beautiful slices glistening red and dotted with white daubs that carry on in neat, symmetrical lines. It’s mostly an older, 60- to 80year-old crowd ordering it, Stein says.

Local preparations of tongue easily predate those deli customers’ birthdays. Sarah Tyson Heston Rorer’s Philadelphia Cook Book: A Manual of Home Economies, which came out in 1886, suggests a braising liquid of stock with onion, carrot, turnip, potato, parsley, bay leaves, Worcestershire and ketchup. Those turn-of-thecentury domestic types would likely flip out over tongue’s contemporary premiums. At Stein’s, they charge $15.99 a pound, versus $7.99 for corned beef. As one of the deli guys puts it, that’s because there’s only one per cow.

Similar logic must apply at Kim’s BBQ in Olney, where a platter of tongue goes for $39.99. The savory aroma once the speckled flaps hit the grill doesn’t lie: first a supernal sweat, then a buttery flavor coating the mouth. Sweet sesame oil pulls out the tongue’s inherent creaminess.

“Mostly Japanese,” says GM Young Kim when I ask who orders tongue the most. And Koreans? “Some,” he says, wanly. The transverse slices here don’t extend to the tongue’s hulking base. “Too fatty and tough,” Kim insists.

That’s where chef Brad Spence of Amis disagrees. “[The tongue base] has the most fat, lots of meat, gelatin — all the good stuff,” he says. That variation is apparent over two different samplings of their famed veal-tongue dish.

The first time, its unctuousness has it brimming with pudding-like aspirations. The second, each bite is different, distinct masses of meat and fat converging in a juicy Pangaea. It was Italy’s poor masses who first honed the preparation. “Leave the expensive stuff that’s crap to the rich,” says Spence.

“It’s usually the girl who’s reluctant while the guy’s going, try it, try it,” says Amis GM Martin Cugine of tongue-ordering couples. “If you can put it out of your head what you think it is and take one bite, we’ll have a new fan.”

Some anecdotal data to support Cugine’s claim comes to me at London Grill. With a braised tongue sitting before me, the last in a line of women turns before heading into the neighboring Paris Wine Bar, her eyes latching on long enough for an elongated “ewwww” to trail off as she exits. More tongue for me. But I wanted to share.

“When you have a moment,” I say to bartender Kelley Wilhelm. I cut into the tongue’s base. I hand her a bite, and within an instant her bravery pays off.

“That is nothing like what I expected. It’s stew-y and meaty,” she says. “It doesn’t taste like offal at all.”

Pretty soon, we’ll all be speaking in tongues. (restaurants@citypaper.net)

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LISTINGS@CITYPAPER.NET | MARCH 15 - MARCH 21

the agenda

[ captured beautifully by visual isolation ]

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the

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LET’S DANCE: The Ladies of Rennie Harris Puremovement perform at Bryn Mawr College on Friday.

RENNIE HARRIS PUREMOVEMENT

The Agenda is our selective guide to what’s going on in the city this week. For comprehensive event listings, visit citypaper.net/listings.

IF YOU WANT TO BE LISTED:

THURSDAY

3.15 [ reading ]

✚ THE CRYING OF LOT 49 MARATHON

Thu., March 15, 4 p.m., free, Kelly Writers House, 3805 Locust Walk, 215746-POEM, writing.upenn.edu.

[ film ]

✚ NORTH BY NORTHWEST Recognizing that Hollywood masterpieces weren’t meant to be viewed via iPhone, Turner Classic Movies’ “Road to Hollywood Tour” is returning

—Michael Gold Thu., March 15, 7:30 p.m., free, Prince Music Theater, 1412 Chestnut St., 215569-9700, tcm.com.

[ theater ]

✚ A CHORUS LINE If some of the monologues in A Chorus Line seem clichéd today, it’s because the 1975 meta-musical about young performers auditioning for the chorus of a Broadway production set an oft-copied tone 37 years ago.

The show’s staying power is undeniable: nine Tony Awards and the Pulitzer Prize for Drama, 6,137 performances (an almost 15-year run), revived on Broadway in 2006. Marvin Hamlisch’s score and Edward

Kleban’s lyrics celebrate the art of performance in “The Music and the Mirror” and “What I Did for Love,” and director Nick Anselmo’s all-undergraduate cast should bring extra veracity to this classic.

—Mark Cofta Through March 31, $10-$25, Tomlinson Theater, Temple University, 1301 W. Norris St., 215-204-1122, templetheaters.ticketleap.com.

FRIDAY

3.16 [ music/film/lecture ]

✚ INVENTING THE MACHINE-MAN While he never composed music for a cartoon in his life, Raymond Scott is forever married in the minds of generations of viewers to Looney Tunes thanks to Carl Stallings’ liberal bor-

rowings for his own collage-like scores. His most indelible theme has become “Powerhouse,” the inevitable accompaniment to every animated machine gone wrong; even divorced from an image, the tick-tock melody automatically suggests industrialization run amok. Scott himself, however, was enamored with technology and was something of a musical mad scientist — a pioneer and inventor in the field of electronic instruments, working with Bob Moog and ending his career researching electronic instruments for Berry Gordy’s Motown. To celebrate the 75th anniversary of Scott’s first recordings, Jeff E. Winner of the Scott archives will offer a 60-minute presentation on his life and work, followed by a screening of the documentary Deconstructing Dad: The Music, Machines and Mystery of Raymond Scott, directed by Scott’s son, Stan Warnow.

—Shaun Brady Fri., March 16, 8 p.m., free, The Rotunda, 4014 Walnut St., bowerbird.org.

[ reading ]

✚ ONE BOOK: EDWIDGE DANTICAT “Create dangerously,” advises Hatian-American author Edwidge Danticat, “for people who read dangerously.” From that comes the title of this year’s One Book, Create Dangerously: The Immigrant Artist at Work, a collection of essays published after Haiti’s tragic earthquake that reflects on his status as an artist in exile. Yet Danticat’s exploration of how emigration and diaspora influence her creative process resonates beyond immigrant communities, which is why her book was chosen as the 10th selection for One Book, One Philadelphia. After eight weeks of programming, the Free Library’s bibliophilic festival culminates with a lecture from Danticat and a performance by Haitian-American composer (and Lady Gaga collaborator) Daniel Bernard Roumain. The event is the zenith of a One Book-themed week that in-

31

After the refined elegance of Mrs. Dalloway and the hepcat jive talk of On the Road, this year’s selection for Kelly Writers House’s annual marathon reading is a bit of a curveball.

Thomas Pynchon’s 1966 no-

—Chris Brown

Hitchcock’s North by Northwest to the big screen. As ad exec Roger Thornhill (Cary Grant) is pursued across the country after being mistaken for a spy, his increasing distrust and paranoia is captured beautifully by his visual isolation in wide-screen frames.

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Submit information by email (listings@citypaper.net) to Josh Middleton or enter them yourself at citypaper.net/submit-event with the following details: date, time, address of venue, telephone number and admission price. Incomplete submissions will not be considered, and listings information will not be accepted over the phone.

vella The Crying of Lot 49 is a tangled web of mystery, murder and secret societies of mailmen.

“We’ve never done one from this time period before, and with its dark, weird underbelly we thought it’d be fun,” says KWH’s Max McKenna. Participants (encouraged to attend in costume) will get 10 minutes to bring the text to life before handing it off. The night also includes food inspired by the book and a local band posing as The Paranoids, the Beatles-biting rock ’n’ rollers that appear throughout the story.

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—Michael Gold Fri., March 16, 7:30 p.m., free, Free Library Central Branch, 1901 Vine St., 215-567-4341, freelibrary.org.

[ folk/pop ]

✚ MEGAFAUN/ WILLIAM TYLER There are two ways of looking at North Carolina’s Megafaun: You either feel bad that its onetime leader took off to become the Grammy-winning, moneySARA PADGETT

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cludes a Haitian quilt workshop for kids, a dance performance at the Annenberg Center and a punishing-looking schedule of book signings across the region.

(Get there early.)

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shoveling guy behind Bon Iver, or you’re relieved that the freak-folksy outfit is rid of that poseur assclown. The brothers Cook (Phil and Brad) and Joe

Westerlund didn’t need Justin Vernon to achieve greatness.

With its dozy harmonies and weird melodies as sleepy as a Xanax-Merlot combo, Megafaun mastered the stone-cold chillfest on 2008’s Bury the Square.

Things got lusher on last year’s self-titled third album, with layers of oddball jazzy instrumentation and offbeat, folk-ish arrangements. Nashville’s William Tyler, a whiz-kid acoustic guitarist who contributed to Tompkins Square’s famed Imaginational Anthem v. 4: New Possibilities, opens.

—A.D. Amorosi Fri., March 16, 9 p.m. $12, Johnny Brenda’s, 1201 N. Frankford Ave., 215739-9684, johnnybrendas.com.

[ dance ]

✚ LADIES OF PUREMOVEMENT Rennie Harris, the acclaimed Philly Pew Fellow and hip-hop dance artist, is currently traveling with his Puremovement dance troupe throughout the Middle East under the auspices of the State Department and Brooklyn Academy of Music.

While the boys (and three

[ the agenda ]

ladies) are touring Egypt, Israel and the Palestinian Territories as diplomats of American street dance, the women’s corps continues to put the language of hip-hop dance in a concert-hall frame stateside. The Ladies of Rennie Harris Puremovement will perform Harris’ pieces “REPREZNT,” to the tune of Adele’s “Hometown Glory,” “CONTINUUM,” “Three B-Boys and a Girl” and “Something to Do with Love.”

—Janet Anderson Fri., March 16, 8 p.m., $20, Goodhart Hall, Bryn Mawr College, 150 N. Merion Ave., 610-526-5210, brynmawr.edu.

SATURDAY

3.17 [ rock/americana ]

✚ ELLIOTT BROOD Elliott Brood (a band, not a

SUNDAY

3.18 [ classical ]

✚ BENJAMIN BEILMAN Benjamin Beilman’s budding

CHRISTIAN STEINER

Not bad for a guy just old enough to order a beer.

—Peter Burwasser Sun., March 18, 3 p.m., $17, Philadelphia Museum of Art, 26th Street and Benjamin Franklin Parkway, 215569-8080, pcmsconcerts.org.

MONDAY

3.19

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Sat., March 17, 9 p.m., $10, with The Pack A.D. and The Timid Roosevelts, North Star Bar, 2639 Poplar St., 215787-0488, northstarbar.com.

[ the agenda ]

the agenda

—K. Ross Hoffman

career as a violinist has had a uniquely Philadelphian trajectory. It begins at Curtis, from which he graduated last year, then on to Astral Artists, where promising young musicians cross the terrifying bridge from student to working artist. Before that, Beilman performed at the renowned Marlboro Festival, located in Vermont but administered in Philadelphia. And now he will make

the naked city | feature | a&e

person) hail from Toronto, but they sure know how to hit that elusive Americana sweet spot between roots-folk heart and rock ’n’ roll muscle.

By turns punkish and tender, Days Into Years (Paper Bag) — reportedly inspired by time spent visiting WWI cemeteries and battlefields in France — has its share of banjo and mandolin, but what really hits it home is Mark Sasso’s mean, sinewy guitar work and richly gritty (and warmly harmonized) lead vocals.

[ dance ]

his recital debut with the Philadelphia Chamber Music Society — this Sunday at the Philadelphia Museum of Art — among a roster that includes the biggest names in classical music. His program is an exciting mix of music by Mozart, Strauss, Prokofiev and a new work by Chris Rogerson, topped off with a violinfireworks version of Carmen.

✚ PHILADELPHIA FLAMENCO FESTIVAL Male dancers have dominated flamenco dance for several centuries. Now it’s time for neoflamenco. For Elba Hevia y Vaca, artistic director of all-female flamenco troupe Pasión y Arte, that means women have the power. They’ll have it in spades when Pasión y Arte hosts the first Philadelphia Flamenco Festival, a two-week series of

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[ the agenda ]

thechecklist Letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s do this

Âł GOVERNMENT WATCHDOCS Going to the movies is largely a docile exercise: Grab your popcorn, plop down in a chair and stare at a screen as events unfold. Yet when it comes to documentaries, passive spectatorship becomes fraught with moral complications. As four flicks culled from the Human Rights Watch Film Festival reveal, cinematic views of civil-liberties violations occupy a precarious position between voyeurism and activism.

The politics of viewing take center stage in You Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Like the Truth: 4 Days inside Guantanamo. Structured around seven hours of declassified surveillance tapes, the film examines the interrogation of teenage detainee Omar Khadr and exposes Guantanamoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s liminal legal status.

Bulgarian-born Mimi Chakarovaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s The Price of Sex (pictured) follows the supply chain of sex trafficking through Europe â&#x20AC;&#x201D; from the post-Soviet East to the brothels of the West. Her work involves alliances with pimps and corrupt cops, implicating her in their unscrupulous dealings.

Director Pamela Yatesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Granito: How to Nail a Human Dictator received a Grand Jury Prize at Sundance for exposing Guatemalan general Efrain RĂ­os Monttâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s genocide against indigenous Mayans. Three decades later, she documents herself combing through footage to provide evidence for a war tribunal and questioning her role in the proceedings.

Ali Samadi Ahadiâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s The Green Wave documents Iranâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Green Revolution in 2009. Using cell-phone-camera footage, talking-head interviews and surreal animated sequences, Ahadi offers an account of abuse and brutality as documented by the victims.

Thu.-Sat., March 22-24, various times, $9 per film, International House, 3701 Chestnut St., 215-387-5125, ihousephilly.org. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Michael Gold

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M A R C H 1 5 - M A R C H 2 1 , 2 0 1 2 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T

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[ the agenda ]

ballet in the West End and on Broadway. Now his production enters another realm, this time

the agenda

TUESDAY

3.20 [ film ]

✚ SWAN LAKE IN 3D “What if the swans were male?” said Swan Lake 3D director/ choreographer Matthew Bourne when asked about the process of creating his visionary (and revisionary) reinterpretation of the famed Tchaikovsky-scored ballet, which premiered in London in 1995 and eventually became the longest-running

allowing passionate fans and the just plain curious to peep his male swan corps in 3D. This nationwide, one-night-only screening features Richard Winsor, crowned by Elle magazine as “the sexiest dancer in the world,” as the lead swan, who with his flock will leap, dance and pirouette wearing only feathered tights.

food | classifieds

—Deni Kasrel March 19-April 1, $25, Christ Church Neighborhood House, 20 N. American St., 215-921-8126, pasionyarteflamenco.org.

the naked city | feature | a&e

performances, screenings, talks and classes. The event brings in Rosario Toledo, an internationally recognized Spanish dancer/choreographer who created a new work, Cómplices, to premiere at the fest. Toledo also will be teaching master classes — a true treat for practitioners of the trade. A panel discussion about flamenco in the 21st century and a movie night offer even more ways for even beginners to get a grip on how this longstanding dance style is moving toward a new aesthetic.

—Gary M. Kramer Tue., March 20, 7:30 p.m., $15, Rave Motion Pictures University City 6, 230 S. 40th St., swanlake3dcinema.com.

More on:

citypaper.net ✚ FOR COMPREHENSIVE EVENT LISTINGS, VISIT C I T Y PA P E R . N E T / L I S T I N G S .

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35

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the agenda

a&e | feature | the naked city

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M A R C H 1 5 - M A R C H 2 1 , 2 0 1 2 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T

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36 | P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R |

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the agenda

GRO

the naked city | feature | a&e

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P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R | M A R C H 1 5 - M A R C H 2 1 , 2 0 1 2 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T |

37

food | the agenda | a&e | feature | the naked city classifieds

[ i love you, i hate you ] CREEPY DANCIN’ D-BAG I love to dance at the barbary. Week after week we go to dance and week after week there is a new creep trying to rub their nasty nuts up on us. Back the fuck off. You follow us like puppy dogs and I can feel your piercing eyes undress me. That’s not OK, you are ruining our fucking night. When you “accidently” grab my ass, don’t be surprised when I “accidently” elbow you in the ribs. If you think that we don’t notice you creeping, we do, you’re dumb as shit. We love to dance, but not with you.

DECISIONS

subsidize your own newest styles. And as for Daddy: it’s most sad that he probably didn’t insist on a prenup. As long as he does everything you don’t do, and lots of it, things will get even better.

In that way, I must admit, your quite practical.

need to do in order to survive and thru that I need to look out for me...I am not looking out for you anymore! Find someone else...oh by the way...don’t ever call me again...I can deal without the bullshit and drama..

I MISS YOU

I’VE LEARNED

I thought about you all weekend...and I had to brush myself off and pick myself up all because of your mercy and your understanding of the type of woman I have become...you know that you meant the world to me...I love the fact that you loved me unconditionally...I miss you stroking my hair

I have truly learned my lesson with all the bullshit with relationships...I am not going to put my all into nothing anymore. I am just going to do what is best for myself and if the person that I am seeing doesn’t have at least half of what I have I am not going to keep pursuing or trying to make situa-

You seem to call at the damdest times when you fucking need something...so guess what buddie... you time is limited with me...I am so fucking stressed...losing weight...my appetite is up and down and I aint got to deal with this shit with you...life is hard but you are making it harder... move on with your life and stay away from me! I hope I don’t ever see you again...

DID YOU LOVE ME? I sit here and I think to myself...what the fuck is wrong with some men....you had a perfectly good girl in your corner and it makes me sick that you keep disappearing over and over like it is a joke or something. I am not going to deal with it and guess what thank you for removing all of your clothing and sneakers etc. from my fucking house. I can’t wait to dismiss your ass..I just want what belongs to me in the long run! Hand over my belongings... because as of now...I am completely done!

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M A R C H 1 5 - M A R C H 2 1 , 2 0 1 2 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T

DO NOT ORDER FROM...

This place is a joke! After my experience tonight (3-11-12 @3am) I will never ever get another damn thing from here. They screwed up my order and many others. The now passed on owners daughter Kelly is a down right nasty bitch. She started a fight with me over the phone when I called to complain that my order wasn’t complete. She admitted to me that she knew my food wasn’t with the rest of the order, started making excuses and then when I said I wanted my money back, she flipped.

She made it sound like it was ok for her dads place to fuck up. Wow, way to really trash everything your dad worked for. I’m sure he’s ashamed of you and your pathetic brother. You don’t get to talk to people any was you want. If you wanna keep business, show some fucking pride or did that die when your dad did? Its not my fault or your customers fault that you are a fat miserable cum farting suck stick, but remember this, u fed your face, rapidly.

Its your fault. So how about u take a class on how to talk to people, might help you in the long run.

GOTH CHICK (WITH CARETAKER) How new. You have much to be proud of — the junior daddies you’ve deceived, foolish intellects you’ve humiliated and insecure lesbians you’ve impressed with your glorified cartoon art. The least your feminist art school could’ve taught you was a highly effective technique known as ‘foreshortening’, though that was never necessary considering the social platform you operate on. Lack of depth was always your biggest asset as you lapped from the feeding bowl of urban indoctrination. Though that will no longer be neccessary. I’ve heard you’ve scammed your newest father into marrying you.

Those dirty old men aren’t so bad after all. Now you can replenish your wardrobe regularly and

surprise results from latent pure happiness, that a person who is so superficially different than me could perform such a nice deed. either way, we can change the world, one dollar a time!

MAKE YOUR TURN and never come back....To the person who slammed on their horn at 9:30 on Tuesday night heading east on Pine Street at 49th while I was entering my home after a long day of work and then yelled out their window “I’m making a turn, get the fuck out of my way!” at the car that was sitting at the stop sign in front of them so loud that I could hear it from nearly a block away... I am a little confused. Why couldn’t you simply go around that person and then make your turn? It wasn’t your anger that struck me, we have all seen road rage and Lord knows in this neighborhood we get a lot of crazy (looking at you weird older man in the laundromat at 48th and Pine who bolted from one end of the room to the other without any warning at all and got right nose-to-nose with me and asked “If I had a problem.” “Nope, just waiting for my laundry but thanks for asking...”) But there was just so little logic to your anger, as if you had no knowledge that your car came with a fucking steering wheel and you were confused which pad below your feet was the brake and which was the accelerator. I think I can speak for all the people trying to relax after a stressful day of work and all the parents who perhaps were trying to put their children to sleep and certainly for the poor person just sitting at that stop sign for one of many good reasons I can think of... “Make that turn, and never fucking come back!”

PIECE OF SHIT I mistakenly thought you were different..boy was I wrong. You’re no different than every other piece of shit out here. I figured your cheating days were behind you....NOT SO MUCH. You & Mocha deserve each other. Both of you can rot in hell. Fuck you, Fuck her, Fuck off you Piece Of Shit.

STAR TWIN i had a dream that i saw you through the front window of the grocery store. we matched up our hands on opposite sides of the glass and everything was instantly forgiven. it keeps me together knowing that you’re happy, alive and reconnecting with people you once shut out. the world needs you in it. i believe that you’ll find someone who’ll never abandon you in this life. someone who’s strong and confident and unafraid - everything i wasn’t. as for me, i’m coping and trying really stinkin’ hard to find the meaning in this life i didn’t want. and telling me that I am too much like you...you already know that I know that...but that is a good thing..I love you MOM and you are the best! PS: Thank you for helping me through this hard time in my life.

I WAS SO IN LOVE OMG....everyone wants to be in love...everyone wants to be told they are being loved and so forth... but when lies start and everything evil like that ....that is when you have a problem....why even bother to lie to me about our relationship. I hate the fact that you keep lying about what you are doing. Don’t you know I am not a fool and I know what I know for a reason. my age in up in years but I still know the dynamics of who I am and what I

tions work with that person. I have truly learned everything. I am just going to focus on myself from here out!

LADY AT THE BUS STOP Thank you for giving me a dollar to get on the bus! having left the bagel shop thinking I had two dollars in the change I was given, I only had one dollar and a five spot, and I was hungover, grumpy, and needed to get to work. it was completely unexpected and it left me with this great sense of real hope for all of us on the planet! you, the generouslyproportioned mom with your daughter. me, a guy with who lets out a slow f bomb when I realized I only had one dollar just as the bus was showing up. and you just gave me a dollar! I wonder if my

STOP AND ACKNOWLEGE What is truly real with you...I am not going to chase you all around to see what you are doing...it is your fucking turn to find out what I am doing...if you need me...or if you want me...you come to me... why do we have to go through this nonsense...can’t you see who truly cares for you...I don’t think that you can...I wish you luck in your quest..but know in your heart...I once loved you! ✚ To place your FREE ad (100-word limit), go to citypaper.net and click on the LOVE/HATE tab near the top of the page. ADS ALSO APPEAR AT CITYPAPER.NET/lovehate. City Paper has the right to re-publish “I Love You, I Hate You”™ ads at the publisher’s discretion. This includes re-purposing the ads for online publication, or for any other ancillary publishing projects.

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Inside each of us there exists an Authentic, Powerful Self.

We will come together as a safe, warm community of women to uncover and heal all that obscures our awareness of our essential nature, exploring and using Andean cosmology. The Power Within Workshop also includes practices of transformative ritual.

We will be working outside frequently, creating mandalas, dancing, rattling, and using fire in the ancient ceremonies which cleanse and vitalize our energy centers. All women and all levels of experience are welcome. Workshop leader Laury Kushner Naron has worked as a Gestalt, Relational and EMDR psychotherapist in private practice for 25 years as well as an energy healer trained in the traditions of the Andes for the last 12.

Event: $300, Food and Lodging: $140

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COMMONWEALTH OF MASSACHUSETTS Juvenile Court Department Lowell Division 89 Appleton Street. Lowell, MA 01852 TO: HAYDEE RIVERA A petition has been presented to this court by DCF, seeking, as to the subject child(ren), SIXTO ANTONIO TORRES AND JAZMIN HEIDI TORRES, that said child(ren) be found in need of care and protection and committed to the Department of Children and Families. The court may dispense the right of the person named herein to receive notice of or to consent to any legal proceeding affecting the adoption, custody, or guardianship or any other disposition of the child(ren) named herein, if it Âżnds that the child(ren) is/are in need of care and protection and that the best interests of the child(ren) is/are in need of care and protection and that the best interests of the child(ren) would be served by said disposition.

You are hereby ORDERED to appear in this court, at the court address set forth above, on 04/10/12, at 9:00 a.m., for a PRE-TRIAL CONFRENCE.

Rave University City, AMC Hamilton 24, AMC Neshaminy 24, Regal Warrington Crossing 22 and Rave Voorhees. @2?C602@

(Example Text: BALLET 19103)

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You may bring an attorney with you. If you have a right to an attorney and if the court determines that you are indigent, the court will appoint an attorney to represent you.

If you fail to appear, the court may proceed on that date and any date thereafter with a trial on the merits of the petition and an adjudication of this matter.

For further information call the OfÂżce of the Clerk-Magistrate at 978-441-2630.

WITNESS:Jay Blitzman. FIRST JUSTICE Asst. Elizabeth Sheehy. Clerk-Magistrate DATE ISSUED: 02/08/12

45

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WWW.MAMBOMOVERS.COM

No purchase necessary. Deadline for entries is Monday, March 19, 2012 at NOON ET. Theater is overbooked to ensure a full house. Arrive early. Tickets received through this promotion do not guarantee admission. There is no charge to text 43KIX. Message and data rates from your wireless carrier may apply.

Text HELP for info, STOP to opt-out. One entry per cell phone number. Late and/or duplicate entries will not be considered. Winners will be notiďŹ ed electronically. Seating is on a ďŹ rst-come, ďŹ rst-served basis, except for members of the reviewing press. No one will be admitted without a ticket or after the screening begins.

Must be 13 years or older to enter contest and attend screening. This ďŹ lm is not rated. Anti-piracy security will be in place at this screening. By attending, you agree to comply with all security requirements. All federal, state, and local regulations apply. More2Screen, Philadelphia City Paper and their afďŹ liates accept no responsibility or liability in connection with any loss or accident incurred in connection with use of a prize.

Tickets cannot be exchanged, transferred, or redeemed for cash, in whole or in part. We are not responsible for lost, delayed, or misdirected entries, phone failures, or tampering. Void where prohibited by law.

)NDOOR /UTDOOR 6INTAGE

HOME IMPROVEMENTS

GENTLY MOVING YOUR EARTHLY POSSESSIONS

TO ENTER FOR A CHANCE TO WIN TWO TICKETS text BALLET with your ZIP CODE to 43549

3PRING 'ARDEN

P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R | M A R C H 1 5 - M A R C H 2 1 , 2 0 1 2 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T |

Fast,flexible,funding solutions.

Tapestry Sound & Recording of Lansdale offers live sound, studio, and live recording services for singer-songwriters, bands, performances, and more. Specializing in mobile recording. Demo packages offered. Contact: Cooper, (215)805-4756.

PricewaterhouseCoopers, LLP has an opportunity for the following position in Philadelphia, PA. Sr. Associate. Reqs. recent exp w/in the following: 5 yrs of IT ops exp w/a Big 4 Acctg Firm or leading global IT svcs co.; 5 yrs exp w/Data Conversion Sys for Guidewire Apps ClaimeCenter & ContractCenter. Travel req. up to 100%. Reqs. incl. Bachelorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s deg in Ops Rsrch, Mgt Info Sys, Comp Eng or rel & 5 yrs recent exp.

Mail resume to Attn: HR SSC/ Talent Mgt, 3109 W. MLK Jr. Blvd., Tampa, FL 33607, Ref #PHISKA. Must be legally authorized to work in the U.S. w/out sponsorship. EOE

Homes for Sale

classifieds

ATTENTION DIABETICS with Medicare. Get a FREE talking meter and diabetic testing supplies at NO COST, plus FREE home delivery! Best of all, this meter eliminates painful finger pricking! Call 888-856-1106.

COMMERCIAL MORTGAGES

Special Price! Call (215)-8734835. 1218 Chestnut St.

is Hiring Organizers to Fight For A Fair & Just Economy For All. Motivation & Passion For Economic Justice A Must. $11.44â&#x20AC;&#x201C;$15.75/hr + Bens-EOE To Apply: 610.940.5848

the naked city | feature | a&e | the agenda | food

Adoptions

food | the agenda | a&e | feature | the naked city classifieds

everything pets pets/livestock Please be aware Possession of exotic/wild animals may be restricted in some areas.

AKITA pure bred, 1st shots, mostly black with good markings $650. 570-394-7953

AMERICAN PIT BULL TERRIERS - Razors Edge, blue bloodline, 6 males, 2 females, UKC reg., shots, $800. Call 215-301-8874

Brittany/Springer Spaniel Puppies.

Ready 3/20. $400. 609-442-2104.

Bull Terrier Puppy Bonanza AKC reg., shots, white, $1,000/ea. 267.251.3703 CANE CORSO PUPS $500/OBO. Call 267-266-9749 Cavalier King Charles puppies Vet checked, health guarantee. Delivery available $750 to $850. (717)821-4953

46 | P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R |

M A R C H 1 5 - M A R C H 2 1 , 2 0 1 2 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T

CAVALIER KING CHARLES SPANIEL - AKC reg., ready April 4th. Call 215-813-4311

Cavalier King Charles Spaniel Puppies available, Call 215-538-2179 Cavalier King Charles Spaniel Pups 3M Tri Color, 1F Blenheim $550. 607.621.5626 CHOCOLATE/SILVER LABS, AKC, mom on premises, $900. 908-850-1588

COLLIES - smart, loving, AKC, show groomed. Top eye exam. (856)825-4856 Doberman Pups, AKC, 7M, 1F, $800. raised in my home. 302-286-7560 ENGLISH BULL DOG 1 year old, spade, all shots. Completely housebroken. All white. $900. Please Call 856-491-1416 English Bulldog pups, 10 wks & 30 wks (cheaper) grandparents & parents on premise, shots, papers. 215-696-5832

English Mastiff/German Shepherd mix pups, vet checked, $250. 717-977-7071

German Shepherd, AKC, 2M, 10 weeks, parents on prem., good w/small children & other animals, $800. (610)935-1360 German Shepherd Puppies, ACA Reg., S/W, farm raised, $350. 610-913-0393

Estate Items: $$$$$$$ FOR MOST ESTATE ITEMS CALL ELAINA (610)609-6973

Golden-Doodles,Standard & Mini, F1, parents on premises, health guarantee, $500-$1000. Call (484)678-6696

MA/Receptionist

Golden Retriever Puppies, family raised, AKC, show quality, $800. 717-548-0946

FT, Must be able to multitask, work flexible hrs, & travel. F)866.459.2825

S. Philadelphia

Golden Retriever Pups - AKC, 6 M, 2 F, $600, 2 year guarantee, 814-212-2024 Havanese Pups AKC Registered, parents on site, health guaranteed, $800-$1500.

Please Call 484-678-6696

Lab Pups AKC- blacks & yellows, health guaranteed, $500. (814)441-2142 LAB PUPS AKC Choc/Yell Raised with TLC. $600 215.490.3245, 484.494.1302 MASTIFF MIX - Neopolitan, Cane Corso, and American Bulldog. Cheap pups $300 neg. Pics avail. Call 267-574-5407 Mini Shih-Tzu’s ACA registered, parents on premises, great temperament, health gaurnteed, $800. Call 484-678-6696

Pit Bull: Camelot Red Nose puppies www.DelawareRedPitBulls.com *health guar., *current shots, *ADBA reg. $1000. Matt (302)750-4882 Pomeranian Pups, Full Breed M/F All Clrs $350 Ready to go 215-989-0765/ nanaboojw@aol.com Poodle Puppies: Standard, home raised, 5 months, 3 males, 2 chocolate, 1 white, $400. Call 610-489-3781

Rottweiler pups, AKC, ready now, s/w, vet checked, $695. 717-940-7249 Rottweiler Pups - Shots & Wormed, Health guaranteed. $500. Adult Male Rottweiler $150. 610-857-4386

Shar Pei: 3 Adorable Purebred Shar Pei puppies for sale. 215-802-9923

Psychology Manager Wilmington, DE

Experienced licensed psychologist to oversee staff who manage mental health and substance abuse services for youth. Supervises clinicians planning for level of care and treatment goals; authorizing services; managing risk and monitoring progress.

Requires experience with developmental, mental health and substance abuse and knowledge of best practices. Delaware is an equal opportunity and affirmative action employer.

Apply at: www.jobaps.com/de/ sup/images/default.asp.

COACHES

The Baldwin School: Bryn Mawr, PA

(BaldwinSchool.org) Seeks coaches for the following: -FALLµ Varsity Cross Country µ Varsity Field Hockey µ Varsity Soccer µ MS Field Hockey µ MS Cross Country µ MS Soccer µ MS Tennis -WINTERµ Varsity Indoor Track Qualified candidates, email current resume, cover letter & 3 references: Aschickfus@baldwinschool.org

SHIH TZU PUPS - 2F 1M, brown & white, parents on site $500 (610)352-2945

SIBERIAN HUSKY PUPPIES with blue eyes, Farm raised, shots, dewormed, extra cute. $300/ea. 610-593-1391 ext: 3

West HighlandTerrier pups, health guar., fam. raised, $600. 610-763-9371 Yorkie 9 weeks old, 1st shots, parents on premises, $500. Call 856-279-2736 Yorkshire Terrier 2 Yorkies $950 female $1500 toy male. 215-939-7414 Yorkshire Terrier pups Male, 14 weeks, $600. 2F, 1M, ready 3/17 $800. Registered, shots, wormed, (609)330-6950

ACME MARKETS Bryn Mawr, PA

Set Up Person

Now Hiring at the new Acme in Bryn Set Up Person for paperbox, right anMawr, 601 West Lancaster Ave., gle gluer. Minimum of 5 years expe19010. immediate interviews. Friday rience. Call after 3pm 215-744-5354.

March 16th, 12pm to 6pm. Saturday March 17th, 12pm to 6pm. at the Radnor Hotel. 595 East Lancaster Ave. St. Davids, PA 19087. Acme, become a team member that will lead to a career of possibilities. Apply online at www.acmemarkets.com.

PUBLIC ADJUSTERS NEEDED! Philadelphia & Suburbs

No Experience- PT $24K/FT $62K. Email resumes to: CareersWithMetro @gmail .com

DESIGN PROFESSIONALS New Jersey

Experienced Wait Staff

TAILOR

Moorestown, NJ

FACULTY

Saint Joseph’s Preparatory School - Philadelphia

St. Joseph’s Preparatory School, a Catholic, Jesuit, college preparatory school in Philadelphia serving nearly 1,000 young men, is seeking qualified candidates for a full-time Chemistry Teacher and a full-time Physics Teacher for the 2012-13 academic year.

For a full posting of the positions please visit our website at www.sjprep.org/employment EOE

JUKEBOX: WURLITZER model 2300S, from 1959 great cond, plays well $1450.

SODA FOUNTAINS (2) From 1960’s need work, $450/each. (609)954-1924

Laptops Net Ready, MS Office, Wireless From $165. 500 games $10, 610.453.2525

BRAZILIAN FLOORING 3/4", beautiful, $2.75 sf (215) 365-5826

The Bureau of Construction Project Review, NJ Dept of Community Affairs in Trenton is seeking Mechanical Engineers with a background in Bensalem, PA HVAC, plumbing and fire protection For fine dining restaurant design for healthcare facilities to do Please call 215-947-1807 plan review of proposed projects.

Applicants need to have a strong working knowledge of Federal and State construction and design standards for healthcare facilities as well as the NJ UCC. Due to the size and nature of the projects, candidates interested in these positions shall possess a NJ registration as an Engineer, and will be required to obtain a HHS Ventresca Ltd., in Doylestown technical license in both plumbing Experienced tailor needed for premiand fire protection as a condition of um men’s store. Salary & benefits. employment.

Fax: 215-348-5874 Qualified applicants should info@ventresca.com fax 609-633-6729 or email nicole.zimmerman@dca.state.nj.us the resume.

NJ is an EOE.

Opex Corporation : Technical writer needed for user and service manuals of document scanners and mail processing equipment. Applicants must be familiar with documenting electro-mechanical systems and Windows based software applications. Experience with Adobe FrameMaker required. Experience with Adobe Dreamweaver, Flash, Captivate, html, asp and php a plus.

Applicant must have a college degree and/or a minimum of three years technical writing experience.

Feel free to submit writing samples along with your resume.

Please contact Joanna Candy at opexhr@opex.com.

WANTED TO BUY ESTATE ITEMS; WE BUY ANYTHING OF VALUE ESPECIAL LY VINTAGE CLOTHING AND ACCES SORIES. (610) 609-6973

Port Richmond

Technical Writer

Shetland Sheepdog AKC Pups, home raised Downingtown. 610-321-2798

SHIH TZU PUPS ACA, 16 weeks, $825.

Call 215-752-1393 English Bulldog Pups, AKC, vet checked, males & females, $1,500. 717-490-4266

jobs

German Shep Pups: Large Boned.

Parents on prem. Good w/kids. www.jolindys.com. 410-957-1279.

Poodle pups Toy Ready to go, M/F, S/W, CKC reg., $375-$425.Call 267-297-8662 CHOW PUPS : CKC reg., s & w, 3M/3F different colors, $500. (717)203-3764

merchandise market

jobs Housekeeper, errands, PT-FT, 5 yrs exp, refs,car,bkgd chk,Overbrook,215.290.2100

Nicole’s House Cleaning Services, 19 yrs exp, Reasonable & Thorough 215.821.3376

CABINETS SOLID MAPLE Brand new soft close/dovetail. Crown molding. Can add or subtract to fit kitchen Cost $6400. Sell $1595. 610-952-0033 Pinball machines, shuffle bowling al leys. Will trade for new fibreglass deck tntquality@aol.com 215.783.0823

Bd a Queen Pillow top matt set $175; King $250 mem foam $295. 215-752-0911 BD Mattress memory foam w/box sprIng Brand New Queen cost $1400, sell $299; King cost $1700 sell $399. 610-952-0033

BED: Brand New Queen Pillowtop Mattress Set w/warr, In plastic. $160; Twin $140; 3 pc King $265; Full set $155.

Memory foams avl. Del. avl 215-355-3878 Bedroom set 6 pc. Cherry Brand new, in box $499. 215-752-0911 Bedroom Set brand new queen 5 pc esp. brown $489; twin, full, king size avail.

Mattress Avail. Del Avail 215-355-3878

Dining Room Set: Superior quality hardwood, large oval table, double pedestal base + matching buffet, can sell seperate or $1400 for both (609)954-1924

NEW MATTRESS Sets $125, Twin, Full Queen (in plastic) delivery (215)307-1950

BABY GRAND PIANO, YAMAHA 5 ft 8 in., Disklavier Mark III series, model # DC2A. Mint Cond. $20,000. (610)566-8930

2012 Hot Tub/Spa. Brand New! 6 person, Color, Lights, Waterfall, Cover. Factory warranty. Never installed! Cost $7,000.

Asking $3,200. 610-952-0033

apartment marketplace

20xx Rowan 3 BR $775 newly renovated, w/w, modern kitchen & bath, Section 8 accepted, 215-474-7678 49xx Pulaski Ave 4br $1100 large house, Section 8 ok, 917-863-8624 Germantown & Chelten 2Br & 6 Br 1st, last and security. Call 267-591-9269

BUYING EAGLES SBL’s & TICKETS

CALL 215-669-1924

EAGLE SEAT Licenses (SBL) buy/sell here, EAGLESBL.COM 610-945-4700 WANTED: EAGLES SBL’S True Eagles fan, Call 610-586-6981

Various 1, 2 & 3 BR Apts $625-$925 www.perutoproperties.com 215.740.4900

19xx N 32nd St. 2br $725+elec. brand new, c/a, $2175 req., 215-322-2375 33&45 RECORDS HIGHER $ REALLY PAID

** Bob 610-532-9408 ***

33 & 45 Records Absolute Higher $

Books -Trains -Magazines -Toys Dolls - Model Kits 610-689-8476

Coins, Currency, Gold, Toys,

Trains, Hummels, Sports Cards. Call the Local Higher Buyer, 7 Dys/Wk

Dr. Sonnheim, 856-981-3397

Coins, MACHINIST TOOLS, Militaria, Swords, Watches, Jewelry 215-742-6438 DIABETIC TEST STRIPS NEEDED- cash paid, local pickup. Call Faith 856.882.9015 Diabetic Test Strips needed pay up to $10/box. Most brands. Call 610-453-2525 I Buy Anything Old...Except People! antiques-collectables, Al 215-698-0787 JUNK CARS WANTED Up to $300 for Junk Cars 215-888-8662 Lionel/Am Flyer/Trains/Hot Whls $$$$ Aurora TJet/AFX Toy Cars 215-396-1903

apartment marketplace 7xx 4th St. 1br $650+utils hdwd flrs, w/d, deck, 302-584-6485

13xx S 22nd St. 2br $775+utils recent reno, hwd flrs, w/d 856-906-5216 15th & Wharton 1 BR $650+gas/elec references required. Call 856-465-3464

Brewerytown 2Br $750 bi-level. Also Studio $550. 267.240.2474 Broad & Stiles 1br $575+utils secured, spacious rms, hdwd, ceramic kit, fin. lower level, parking (267)918-1420

49xx N. 12th St 1br $675 new range, carpet, sec 8 ok 215.842.0290

5253 West Ford Rd 2BR $750 2nd flr, $2250 to move in, 215-455-8962 5853 N. Camac 1BR $650+utils granite kit, 267.271.6601 or 215.416.2757 60XX Warnock 1 BR $595+ near Fernrock Train Station,215-276-8534 Eli Ct.-1418 Conlyn/Julien- 5600 Ogontz Convenient Living near LaSalle University Stud. 450-$575 1br 575-$675 2br $775 Gas, Water, Heat Free- SEC 8 WELCOME Call to schedule appt @ 215-276-5600 LaSALLE UNIV AREA 4BR 1.5BA hdwd flrs, full kitchen, Patio $1650/ month NOT incl utils. 215-850-6618

20xx W Tioga Effic. $450 & 2br $650 clean, 1st, last & 1 mo. sec. 215-519-0979

YEADON large 2BR $875+utils 2nd flr, HW flrs, new renov 215.668.3509

35xx N. 15th St. 3br $775/mo 3 mo move-in, 2nd flr dplx 267.934.1643

Broad & Hunting Park 2br $725+utils 3rd flr, nwly renov. & 1st flr 1br, newly renov. priv. entry $685+ut (215)559-5039

1 BR & 2 BR Apts $715-$835 spacious, great loc., upgraded, heat incl, PHA vouchers accepted 215-966-9371

1xx Manheim 2Br $700 Effic’y $480. great transp. 610-287-9857

214 N. 54th St. Efficiency $550 2 room, 1st/last/sec. 610-454-0292

5220 Wayne Ave. Studio & 1 BR on site lndry, 215-744-9077, Lic# 507568

4224 Parkside Ave 2br $950+utils w/d, balcony, hdwd flrs, cent.air, beautiful park view & PT Museum (267)591-8487

Fieldview Apts-705 E. Church Lane Penn Lee Court- 557 E. Church Lane Studio 575-$600, 1br700-$750, 2br $850 Gas, Water, Heat Free- SEC. 8 WELCOME Call to schedule appt @ 215-276-5600

51xx W. Thompson St. 2BR off 52nd St., Sec 8 OK. 215-848-5072 56th & Market 2BR $600 2 mo. sec., credit check. 856-258-5237 5728 Girard Ave 1BR $540+utils 1st & last mo. rent req. 610-284-6652

DOMINO LN 1 & 2 BR $695-$875 Renovated, parking, d/w, near shopping & dining, move in special, 215-500-7808

58th & Lansdowne 1 BR $550+utils Fresh paint. Avail Immed. 610-864-6315 63rd St 1BR $600 2nd flr, convenient loc. 267-467-0394 P a r k s id e A r e a 2Br-6Br starting @ $800. Newly renov, new kit & bath, hdwd flrs, Section 8 OK. Call 267-324-3197

W 6th Ave. 1br apt 2nd flr $800 priv. entry, 1st, last & sec., (610)828-1166

Chester 2BR $625 Call 267-242-5675 or 215-920-3851 Sunshine Rd 3BR/1BA $795/mo +utils HUGE mod apt w/prkng 2nd fl loc ,hdwd flrs. MOVE IN NOW! call G 267-872-4709

1721 Memorial Ave. 1br $560+utils fin. bsmnt., newly renov. 610-551-1023

4xx N. 59th St 1BR $600+ recently renov., near transp. 215.877.2120

35XX Grant Ave. 2BR/1BA $825 sec.

Great loc! Must see! Great view! New carpet, paint. Heat/Cntr Air 484-716-4639.

4647 Adams Ave 1br & 2br Newly renov. 215-744-9077 lic#433314 6812 Ditman St. 1 BR prkg,lndry fac.Lic# 212751. 215-744-9077 Academy & Grant 2BR $795+ 1st flr,w/w, c/a,off st prkg 856.346.0747 PHILMONT HEIGHTS 2 BR 1st flr $825 new kitch, w/w & paint, gar, 267.467.1596

Cedarbrook & Vernon Rd 2br $775+utils new wall/wall carpet, ceiling fans, garage, laundry facilities, Call (215)836-7471

20xx N. 62nd 1-2BR $650-$950 nice block, 1st, last & sec. (215)878-5056

61xx Old York Rd 1Br/1Ba $550+utils 2 large rooms. Call 215-276-1045

homes for rent 1219 W. Flora 3br/1ba $1050+utils Google map it, newly renov., w/d, conv. loc., yard, patio, 2 mo. sec. (610)659.7274

539 Mifflin St. 3BR/2BA 267-688-8356

$1,300

15xx S. Lindenwood St. 3BR/1BA $675 util. w/w crpt, frnt porch, sm yard, 2 mos sec, 1st mo rent move in. 267-872-4067 60XX Allman St. 3BR $650 newly renov, all welsome, 610-668-1784 64xx Grays Ave 3br/1ba $800 central air, wall/wall carpet. washer/ dryer, close to park & transp. 267-249-2506 65th and Chester Ave 3br $900 Modern, new hardwood flrs, wall-wall, dishwasher, Section 8 OK. 215-370-0861 78xx Saturn Pl. Eastwick 3br $965 avail 4/1, nice neighborhd, 610.710.1986 Southwest Phila. Area 3BR $775 House for Rent. Down Payment: 1 month rent plus 2 months security.

Contact 215-724-0270 SW (Elmwood Area) modern 3br house new crpts, sect. 8 welcome 215.726.8817

2br & 3br Houses Section 8 welcome beautifully renovated, (267)981-2718 55XX Ludlow St 2BR/2BA Newly renovated. Sec 8 ok 267-265-7996 60xx Callowhill 4BR $1,000+utils front & back yard, 2 story, basement. $2,000 mvn. Call in evening 610.259.5746 7xx N 48th 3br $800+utils fresh paint, w/w carpet 215-519-0979

16xx Huntingdon 5br/3ba $1000+utils 30xx W Colona 4br/1ba $1000+utils section 8 welcome, Call 215-559-9289

1437 W Tioga St 2BR/1.5BA $800 + util House for Rent. Close to public transportation. Call 267 971 3768 1xx Linton St. 3BR/1BA $900+utils Section 8 OK. Call 215-740-4629 Alcott St. 3BR newly renov., section 8 ok 215.681.7690 Feltonville 46XX Boudinot St. 3BR Mod Kit, Hw Floors, Lge Bsmt, w/Garage Sec-8 ok. Call 215 940 0955

11xx Tioga St. 4br/1ba $800-$850 new carpet, fresh paint 215-983-7691 45xx N Mole St 3BR/1BA $825+ utils very nice, very clean, wont last, section 8 ok, Call now (215)651-7435

1xx W Logan 7br 1st month rent & 2 month security dep., sec 8 ok, no pets, Call 215-539-7866

5 Series 2010 $29,800 blue w/brown lthr, 21k mi. (267)603-1735

76xx Thouron 3Br $950 great neighborhd, avail 4/1, 610.710.1986

STS 2006 $18,000 25k mi, exc cond. Ext. warr. 215-460-9317

7xx E Allegheny large 2br/1.5ba $685+ newly renovated, 215-836-1960 8xx E. Hilton St. 3br/1ba $900+ 1 mo. sec. Sec. 8 ok, renov., near K & A and new elementary school 215.206.4582

HIGHLANDER Hybrid 2007 $22,500 Exc cond., warranty 2014. (610)220-4566

26xx MercerSt. 3BR/1BA $1000/mo.

Total rehab. Call Greg 215-668-3990

20xx Pratt St. 3br Section 8 approved, 215-205-9910 23xx Strahle 2BR & 3BR Duplex 1st & 2nd floor, Sec 8 ok 215-264-2340 44xx Mckinley 3br/1ba $800 deck, nice house, good loc. 610-710-1986 53xx Jackson St. 3BR $950 + utils newly renovated, call 215-684-2626

64xx Dorcas St. 3br/2.5ba $925 full bath in master br, hdwd flrs, washer, credit check a must, (215)498-1807 Mayfair 3br $950 + Comp. Ren. twin Sec 8 OK. 215-364-0217

CHESTER: 225 Ivy St. 2BR $550 2209 W 3rd St. 4BR/2BA $900 1123 Terrill St. 3BA $750 Newly Renovated, Call 610-772-3220

Chester 3 story 6 br / 2 full bath, porch, bkyd, driveway, new roof & carpets, sec.

8 ok. Move-in now! Call 610-551-8301 Up. Darby: Dermond St 3br/1.5ba $1200 all newly renovated, clean, finished basement, beautiful street, (610)356-1130 Upp. Darby: 7218 Spruce St. 3Br $1100 DR, LR, Kitchen, sunroom (484)477-6461

TRAILER 1999 near Ocean City with a/c & heat. furniture incl, $10k (856)266-0396

$300 & UP FOR JUNK CARS CALL 215-722-2111 CASH FOR CARS - Any Type of Vehicles: High Quality orJunk Cars. (732)221-4008

Cash paid on the spot for unwanted vehicles, 24/7 pick up, 215-288-9500

Junk Cars & Trucks Wanted, $400, Call 856-365-2021

JUNK CARS WANTED 24/7 REMOVAL. Call 267-377-3088

A1 PRICES FOR JUNK CARS FREE TOW ING , Call (215) 726-9053

Harley Davidson Heritage Softtail 2010 $12,500. only 4k, exc cond. 609.226.5350 HD Softail Duece 2001 $9,000/obo orig. price $22K, 10K miles 215-364-0217

Ford Explorer 2003 $8500/obo Touring Ed, 6 cyl, great gas 610-405-0318 Williamstowne/Monroe 4br $1,590 detached garage & shop, 917-653-0272

Pedricktown (exit 7) 3br/1.5ba $1250+ LR, DR, kitch, laundry, basement, fridge, stove, d/w, avail 3/26. 856-466-4002

resorts/rent N. WILDWOOD - 327 E. 11th Ave. 2 blocks to beach, Clean 1BR apt. $5,500. & 2BR, $8,400. May 18th - Sept. 24th. No pets. 215-271-8620 or 609-407-0434

Ocean City Apt. 3BR Seasonal $6,500 gets 5/1-9/30, w/parking (609)703-7246

North Wildwood, $6,400 Seasonal Renta from May 1 till Labor Day, Nicely decorated, 3rd Floor efficiency, sleeps 4 with pool, 2 blocks from beach, laundry facility on premises, no pets.

Call 856-229-5195 or emaildarlenef@comcast.net Wildwood 1br Efficiency season $4000 +sec. 1 & 1/2 Blks to Beach 609-707-1990

TOYOTA TUNDRA SRS 2003 $7985 luxury pickup, 4 dr w/ext. cab, 4WD, a/c, carefully driven looks new (215)629-0630

low cost cars & trucks Cadillac 1999 Sedan Deville $3675 Lux 4 dr, a/c, full pwr, orig pampered mi, woman driver, Call Carol 215-922-5342 Cadillac Deville 2004 $4450 low miles, mnrf, DTS rims 267-592-0448 Chevy Blazer 1994 $1250 all pwrs, 4WD, 4dr, runs exc 215.620.9383 Geo Metro 1996 $2450 5 spd., 3 cyl., 45 mpg, 68k, 215-620-9383 Chevy Impala 2005 $4275 V6, loaded, CD, alarm, cln 267-592-0448

Chevy Venture LS 2001 $4500 loaded, 1owner, 92K, CarFax 215.237.0109 Jeep Gr. Cherokee Laredo 2003 $5495 6cyl., auto, loaded, fully serviced, new insp., 1 owner, 112k, wtty. (610)637-2441 Pont. Bonneville LE 1990 $995 all pwrs, new tires, runs new215.620.9383 Pontiac Grand-AM 2002 $3,400 4 door, 104k miles, 4cyl. 215-850-0061 TOYOTA COROLLA 1997 $3300 122k mi, exc. running cond 610-659-4307

47

W. Phila 2, 3 & 4 br Bi-Levels Avail Now Move in Special! 215-386-4791 or 4792

Green Tree Apts-330 West Johnson St. Modern & Quiet Living in West Mt. Airy Starting-1BR $700-$750 & 2BR $900 Gas,Water,Heat Free-Move In Specials Call to schedule appt. 215-276-5600

11xx N. 55TH ST. BRAND NEW BUILDING Single rooms $400. Double rooms $600.

Rooms w/ bath & kitchen $600. Rooms come fully furnised w/ full size beds, fridge, and dresser. SSI/SSD/VA & Public assistance ok. Also SW, West, North Phila, Frankford areas. Call 267-707-6129 13th/Erie furn rms $85 & up/week Priv. ent, single occupancy 215-514-7143 18xx W. Ontario St. - shared kitch, clean environment, $400/mo, 215-287-2424 23rd & Hunting Pk., 2 lrg, clean, renov., w/w, $85-$100/wk., 215-570-0301 25th & Clearfield, 51st & Wanamaker, 51st & Chester, Share Kitch. & Bath, $350 & up, No sec dep, SSI OK . 1br Apt at 42nd & Westminster. Call 215-758-7572 30xx N. 16th furn. room, $65-$110/wk, near Temple Med & transp. 215-397-1283 52ND & LOCUST - Lovely, lge furnished sleeping room. Reasonable. 215.747.2359 55th/Thompson furn lg room $135wk, priv ent, $200 sec 215-572- 8833 5743 Cedar: LOOK nice rooms for rent, w/access to entire house 215-863-1235 60xx Vine St, $115/week, 2 week security, cable tv, Please Call Gee 267-767-4496 61xx Chew Ave, Mt. Airy, W Phila, Poplar , $85-$100/wk. 215-242-9124 BreweryTown/Temple U: Luxury furn. rms, priv ent., no smoking 267-240-2474 Broad & Allegheny, rooms, private bath, $110/week, $275 move-in. 215-765-5578 Broad & Olney deluxe furn room priv ent $110 -$145wk. Sec $200. 215-572-8833 Frankford, furnished, near bus & El, $85/wk & up + $295 sec. 215-526-1455 Germantown Area: NICE, Cozy Rooms Private entry, no drugs (215)548-6083 GERMANTOWN room $100/wk.

215-205-2452 or 267-593-2131 Hunting Park: Furn. Luxury Rooms. Free utils, cable & internet. 267-331-5382 N Phila Furn, Priv Ent $75 & up . No drugs, SSI ok. available now 215.763.5565 SW,N, W Move-in Special! $90-$125/wk Clean furn. rooms. SSI ok. 215-220-8877

SW Phila room 58th & Beaumont newly renov. $120 week. 347-262-3485 SW, W & N Phila, large room for rent, utils incl, newly renovated (215)768-7059 W Phila & G-town: newly ren lg, lux rms /apts. ALL utils incl, SSI ok, 215-519-4715

5xx Vernon Road 3br/1.5ba $1200+utils C/A, hdwd flrs, recently renovated, Call 215-833-5083 or 215-760-3850

P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R | M A R C H 1 5 - M A R C H 2 1 , 2 0 1 2 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T |

10xx S. 52nd St. Lrg 3BR 10xx S. 52nd St. 1BR Laundry room, section 8 ok. 215-727-0431

1,2, 3, 4 Bedroom FURNISHED APTS LAUNDRY-PARKING 215-223-7000

4645 Penn St. 1BR $625. newly renov gas/wtr inc 215-781-8072 4840 Oxford Ave Studio, 1Br & 2Br Apts Ldry, 24/7 cam lic# 214340 215.744.9077 Albright St. 3BR/1BA $900/mo.

Complete renov., incl. porch. Sec. 8 OK. Near Castor & Frankford. (908)578-1677

SW Philadelphia Room for rent. $250 move in, share kit & bath. 267-251-2749

automotive

classifieds

* * * 215-200-0902 * * *

37xx N 18th St. 1.5 BR $500+utils $1300 move in req, 3rd flr (267)632-3302

6515 N 8th St. 3BR Newly renov. Lic# 212705, 215-744-9077 68xx 13th St. 1BR $500+ elec/gas, quiet location, 215-924-0648 E.O.L: 67xx 7th St. 2br $600+utils 2 month security. Call 215-224-6566

Ocean City: sunny, spacious, duplex, 1br, $7950 season, $4250 half season, 1br with loft $9400/$4950. (609)398-1348

the naked city | feature | a&e | the agenda | food

merchandise market

billboard [ C I T Y PA P E R ]

MARCH 15 - MARCH 21, 2012 CALL 215-735-8444

Building Blocks to Total Fitness 41035:4 $"'c featuring the girls of

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Bachelor Party Headquarters All Nude, All The Time Home Of The 5 min. Lap Dance

12 Years of experience. Offering personal fitness training, nutrition counseling, and flexibility training.

Specialize in osteoporosis, injuries, special needs. In home or at 12th Street Gym. MCKFitness@yahoo.com

STUDY GUITAR W/ THE BEST David Joel Guitar Studio All Styles All Levels.

Former Berklee faculty member.

Masters Degree with 27 yrs. teaching experience.

215.831.8640 www.myphillyguitarlessons.com

I BUY RECORDS, CDâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S, DVDâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S 8:00pm â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 5:00am

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185 South Carolina Ave. Atlantic City (South Carolina & Boardwalk)

609-340-8820

TOP PRICES PAID. No collection too small or large!

We buy everything!

Call Jon at 215-805-8001 or e-mail dingo15@hotmail.com

NEW AT THE EL BAR!!!

KENSINGTON HAPPY MEAL! EVERY DAY UNTIL 7PM 2 ALL BEEF HOT DOGS A PBR POUNDER A BAG OF CHIPS AND A TOY ALL FOR $5

TEQUILA SUNRISE RECORDS

½ PRICED DRAFTS WEEKDAYS 5-7PM

17 Rotating Drafts Close to 200 Bottles

www.devilsdenphilly.com www.facebook.com/devilsdenphiladelphia www.twitter.com/devilsdenphilly

525 West Girard Ave VINYL AND CD SPECIALISTS CLASSIC & MODERN GLOBAL SOUNDS HOUSE TECHNO DUBSTEP DUB DISCO FUNK SOUL JAZZ DIY PUNK LSD ROCK AND LIGHT HARMONY ROOTS BLUES NOISE AVANT AND MORE TUESDAY-SUNDAY 12-6PM 01-215-965-9616

Learn the Art of Rock

Guitar, Bass and Drum Lessons www.rawku.com Call Daniel @ 215.844.7295

WATKINâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S DRINKERY

Happy hour everyday even weekends - from 5-7.

1/2 price on all 6 taps!

Check out our upstairs game room with pool, darts, and some classic arcade games.

On the corner of 10th & Watkins Streets in South Philly.

FREE DRINKING SMARTPHONE APP!!!

City Paper is very pleased to bring you our very first smartphone app!

Just go to www.citypaper.net and click our martini glass icon to find out more, or type in â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Happy Hours in the app store, android marketplace, or blackberry app world. Click the orange martini icon and get drinking. No matter where you go or when you go, you can find the nearest happy hours to you with a single click! You can even sort through bars by preference or neighborhood.

SILK CITY Â&#x2DC; Â&#x2DC;

FRIDAY

SO SPECIAL BO BLIZ & DJ MANIK SATURDAY

DJ DEEJAY SUNDAY

SUNDAE

DJ BRENDAN BRING â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;EM Open every day 4pm - 2am Sat & Sun Brunch 10am - 4pm 5th & Spring Garden www.silkcityphilly.com

DANCERS WANTED

Flexible hours, will train, no experience necessary, excellent pay, safe/secure environment.

Call (609) 707-6075

THE EL BAR

Happy Hour Mondays-Fridays 5-7pm $2.50 Kenzinger Pints & More!

215-634-6430 www.myspace.com/the_el_bar

(*'5 $&35*'*$"5&4 "7"*-"#-&

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Collectibles, Antiques, Musical Instruments, Cameras, Electronics Check Cashing â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Money Orders- Money Gram Agent.

We Buy Gift Cards 645 South Street, Philadelphia. 215-925-7357

Philadelphia Eddies 621 Tattoo Haven 621 South 4th St (Middle of Tattoo Row) 215-922-7384 Open 7 Days

JOBS: FIGHT FOR THE 99% Working America / AFL-CIO is Hiring Organizers to Fight For A Fair & Just Economy For All. Motivation & Passion For Economic Justice A Must. $11.44â&#x20AC;&#x201C;$15.75/hr + Bens-EOE To Apply: 610.940.5848

HAPPY HOUR AT THE DIVE FREE PIZZA! $2 BEER OF THE WEEK! $2 WELL DRINKS! ITâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S AMAZING! PASSYUNK AVE (7th & CARPENTER) 215-465-5505 myspace.com/thedivebar

SEMEN DONORS NEEDED

Healthy, College Educated Men 18-39 ~ $150/Sample WWW.123DONATE.COM

Azuka Theatre Presents Hope Street and Other Lonely Places Now-Apr. 1 @ Off-Broad Street Theater azukatheatre.org

FRANKINSTIEN BIKE WORX

Clearance on all multi-speed bikes!

1529 Spruce Street. Philadelphia 215-893-0415

Fashion Fetish?

200+ steel boned corsets in stock size S-8XL Rubber-Leather-KiltsMore by 26 designers.

PASSIONAL Boutique 704 S. 5th St. Noon-10PM, 7 days a week www.passionalboutique.com

â&#x20AC;&#x153;..#&&3 -*45 )"4 (308/ 50 &1*$ 1301035*0/4 ,*5$)&/ )"4 "%%&% "/ &953" #&-- 8*5) 1&3)"14 5)& $*5:Âľ4 #&45 '3*5&4 40.& 45&--"3 #&&3 #"55&3&% '*4) "/% 7&3: (00% .644&-4Âł Revisited April 2007

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AWARD WINNING, WORLD FAMOUS CUSTOM STUDIO ARTISTIC TATTOOING!

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SOCIETY HILL LOAN

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