Philadelphia City Paper, April 15th, 2010

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cpstaff We made this

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Publisher Paul Curci Associate Publisher Nancy Stuski Editor in Chief Brian Howard Senior Editor Patrick Rapa News Editor Jeffrey C. Billman Senior Writer Isaiah Thompson Staff Writer Holly Otterbein Associate Editor and Web Editor Drew Lazor Arts Editor and Copy Chief Carolyn Huckabay Deputy Arts and Entertainment Editor Molly Eichel Assistant Copy Editor Carolyn Wyman Meal Ticket Contributors Felicia D’Ambrosio, Marie DiFeliciantonio Contributing Editors Sam Adams, E. James Beale (sports) Contributors A.D. Amorosi, Janet Anderson, Rodney Anonymous, Mary Armstrong, Nancy Armstrong, Debra Auspitz-Galler, Justin Bauer, Shaun Brady, Peter Burwasser, Charles Cieri, Mark Cofta, Will Dean, Jesse Delaney, Jakob Dorof, Deesha Dyer, David Faris, M.J. Fine, David Anthony Fox, Lauren F. Friedman, Cindy Fuchs, Ptah Gabrie, Julia Harte, Dan Hirschhorn, K. Ross Hoffman, Deni Kasrel, Brian James Kirk, Gary M. Kramer, Gair Marking, Natalie Hope McDonald, Andrew Milner, Michael Pelusi, Nathaniel Popkin, Trey Popp, Robin Rice, James Saul, Daniel Schwartz, David Snyder, Jon Solomon, Amy Strauss, Andrew Thompson, Tom Tomorrow, Sam Tremble, Char Vandermeer, John Vettese, Kelly White, Lewis Whittington, Christopher Wink Editorial Interns Christine Adkins, Mandy Bee, Lara Coleman, Emily Currier, Alexandra Harcharek, Sam Kaplan, Josh Middleton, Eric Pettersson, Tom Tiballi, Julia West Webmaster Marc Steel Associate Web Editor/Staff Photographer Neal Santos Systems Administrator John Tarng Production Director Michael Polimeno Editorial Art Director Reseca Peskin Senior Editorial Designer Allie Rossignol Senior Designer Evan M. Lopez Designer Alyssa Grenning Contributing Photographers Michael M. Koehler, Jessica Kourkounis, Michael T. Regan, Mark Stehle Contributing Illustrators Jeffrey Bouchard, Ryan Casey, Kris Chau, Don Haring Jr., Thomas Pitilli, Matthew Smith Human Resources Ron Scully (ext. 210) Accounts Receivable Coordinator Tricia Bradley (ext. 232) Circulation Director Mark Burkert (ext. 239) Founder & Editor Emeritus Bruce Schimmel Advertising Sales Manager Angela Serafine (ext. 215) Senior Account Managers Robb Allison (ext. 252), Sharon MacWilliams (ext. 262), Mia Salazar (ext. 250), Stephan Sitzai (ext. 258) Account Managers Sara Carano (ext. 228), Natalie Diener (ext. 257), Donald Snyder (ext. 213) Adult Advertising Sales Rick Hicks (ext. 236) Office Coordinator Alexis Pierce (ext. 234)

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citypaper.net 123 Chestnut Street, Third Floor, Phila., PA 19106. 215-735-8444, Tip Line 215-7358444 ext. 241, Listings Fax 215-875-1800, Classified Ads 215-248-CITY, Advertising Fax 215-735-8535, Subscriptions 215-735-8444 ext. 235 Philadelphia City Paper is published and distributed every Thursday in Philadelphia, Montgomery, Chester, Bucks & Delaware Counties, in South Jersey and in Northern Delaware. Philadelphia City Paper is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. Additional copies may be purchased from our main office at $1 per copy. No person may, without prior written permission from Philadelphia City Paper, take more than one copy of each issue. Pennsylvania law prohibits any person from inserting printed material of any kind into any newspaper without the consent of the owner or publisher. Contents copyright © 2010, Philadelphia City Paper. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced without written permission from the publisher. Philadelphia City Paper assumes no obligation (other than cancellation of charges for actual space occupied) for accidental errors in advertising, but will be glad to furnish a signed letter to the buying public. LETTERS & SUBMISSIONS Letters should be brief and are subject to editing. Authors must sign their name for publication and each must contain an address and telephone number for verification, although neither address nor telephone number will be published. Unsolicited submissions are welcome but must be accompanied with a SASE if return is desired.

contents Why is a raven like a writing desk?

Naked City ...................................................................................6 Cover Story ..............................................................................12 Arts & Entertainment.........................................................22 Food & Drink ...........................................................................45 COVER PHOTOGRAPH BY NEAL SANTOS DESIGN BY RESECA PESKIN


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city

CP’s Quality-o-Life-o-Meter

[ + 2] Gambling mogul Steve Wynn announces

that he will not build a casino on the Philly waterfront. “Holy shit,” says Casino-Free Philadelphia. “We’ve never celebrated a non-moral victory! Do we drink now?!”

[0]

“We feel very much victimized,” says Foxwoods lawyer Stephen Cozen about Steve Wynn’s decision not to build a casino in Philly. And the whole city cries. A hat is passed around, so that a monument may be built with an eternal flame lit and a prayer said that this never happen again, a corporate lawyer having his time kinda wasted, even though he still gets to bill for it.

[ + 1] A pastor, a reverend and a rabbi bless the

baseballs used in the Phillies’ home opener. Soccer balls used in the Union opener blessed by a bartender, a horse and a 12inch pianist.

[ - 1]

A film crew for Dark Fields transforms 19th and Market to look like a New York City intersection. By shitting on the curb.

EVAN M. LOPEZ

[ + 3] The Pennsylvania SPCA throws a dog

“garage” sale in North Philly. Afterward, all overstock is left in the “garage” with the “car running.”

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[ + 1] A University of Pennsylvania dental school

alum leaves $17.3 million to the school. It is a giant sack of gold teeth, and it is gross.

[ + 6] Using DNA evidence, detectives solve four decades-old “cold cases.” Those heavyhanded flashbacks set to songs popular at the time of the crimes helped, too.

[0]

The Franklin Institute announces that Bill Gates has won the 2010 Bower Award for Business Leadership. Presenting it will be the previous two winners: a skinned and plastinated peasant striking a humiliating pose, and Boba Fett.

[ + 2] Bicycling.com votes Philly No. 27 in Amer-

ica’s top 50 bike-friendly cities. Everyone knows it’s best to stay with the peloton until the very end.

[ + 8] Two Daily News reporters win a Pulitzer

for their “Tainted Justice” series. More importantly: Since those stories first ran, there has been real reform in the world of judge grundles.

This week’s total: 22 | Last week’s total: 7

AMILLIONSTORIES Now with 34 percent more spine

J

obs With Justice (JWJ), the labor organization whose Philly chapter has dedicated its entire existence to raising hell about security service giant AlliedBarton, is used to not getting quite what it wants. When it tried to unionize Temple guards, it ended up winning the workers a few sick days. When it tried unionizing Penn guards, it won them a few sick days, plus a $5 per hour raise specifically for guards who ride bicycles (weird). And for the past two years, its dogged attempts to get the Philadelphia Museum of Art to look it in the eye and tell it to fuck off have proven mostly fruitless. But in the past month, JWJ has seen two of its biggest victories against AlliedBarton yet. On March 16, the Northumberland County Commissioners stopped subcontracting security work out to AlliedBarton for $193,000 a year, because, “We want to be fair to the employees,” Commissioner Kurt Masser told local paper The Daily Item (famous for being the most adorably named newspaper in Pa.). Then City Councilman Bill Greenlee received a March 31 letter from Art Museum director Timothy Rub saying, “The museum urges AlliedBarton to respect the wishes of the majority of the security officers and bargain in good faith with the [Philadelphia Security Officers Union].” The PSOU is the union the guards voted to approve Oct. 10, 2009 — though AlliedBarton filed an appeal with the National Labor Relations Board (NRLB) alleging “inconsistencies in the election,” thus

preventing the union’s recognition ever since. Finally, it seemed, the museum was taking a stand. But that supportive statement didn’t come completely from the benevolence of the Museum’s vividly colored heart: Greenlee had dangled the prospect of withholding the museum’s $2.3 million appropriation. Sort of. “To be honest, I’ve never said that directly,” Greenlee says. “I’ve said we don’t want to have a problem with the [Council] hearing [April 12].” At that hearing — at which council members took turns berating AlliedBarton, according to the account posted on the pro-union thatfinalstraw.com — Rub said that, although AlliedBarton’s contract was now month-to-month and the museum would consider competing bids, he also planned to let the NRLB process play out, no matter how long that takes. That part about the museum growing a spine? Not so much.

Sorry about that, Sparky.

➤ GOVERNMENT IN THE SUNSHINE

You know how this state has an open-records law that some state officials would just as soon pretend doesn’t exist? No? Well, you’re not in the newspaper business. But we are. So it is with no >>> continued on adjacent page


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AMILLIONSTORIES <<<

E VA N M . L O P E Z

small amount of joy that we celebrate the recent (albeit partial) victory of the Brattleboro, Vt.based Prison Legal News (prisonlegalnews. org) — seriously, we cannot believe you’ve never heard of it — over the Pennsylvania Department of Corrections (PDOC), which apparently does not think you are entitled to know how much money it has paid out in legal damages to prisoners and employees in recent years, even though they’re writing those checks with your money. “The litigation spending,” explains PLN editor Paul Wright, “is a barometer of how well or poorly run a prison is.” According to court records, in February 2009 Wright filed a request under the state’s Right to Know Law (RTKL) for records related to any claims in excess of $1,000 that PDOC paid out between 2001 and 2008. PDOC told him they’d be happy to … right after Wright cut them a check for $8,750. By PDOC’s guesstimate, he was asking for 35,000 pages of information — 175 cases per year (!) times 25 pages per case times eight years — and they were charging him 25 cents-per-page for copies. Wright refined his search, and asked for electronic records and a spreadsheet listing the settlements and payments the department had issued. PDOC’s response: The electronic records don’t exist, so $8,750, please. “When they say they don’t track their litigation, that’s quite the

stunning management failure at every level,” Wright says. The

department also denied Wright’s request to waive the fees, a courtesy the RTKL allows for requests made in the “public interest.” Wright appealed to the Office of Open Records (OOR), arguing that the price the PDOC was asking far exceeded what other agencies — state, federal and local — had asked for similar requests. OOR decided that PDOC’s fees were legit; however, it also said that PDOC had to make the records available for Wright to inspect — though not copy — within 30 days. Both sides appealed to the Commonwealth Court of Pennsylvania: Wright, because he thought the fees were prohibitively exorbitant; PDOC, because it wanted the chance to go through the records and see if there were any to which Wright wasn’t entitled. On April 8, a three-judge panel remanded the case back to OOR, and ordered PDOC to provide a better explanation for its estimates and why it had denied the fee waiver. Meanwhile, the judges instructed OOR to allow PDOC to review the records before turning them over. Wright considers the ruling a victory, although “weaker than I hoped for.” In an e-mail, PDOC spokeswoman Susan McNaughton says the fee that the department demanded was for copies, and that PDOC never tried to charge Wright for labor costs. Also, she says, Wright rejected PDOC’s proposal that he review cases from a smaller time frame at a lower cost. Wright says he came away from the experience with the distinct impression that PDOC would rather him not see those records: “I’m disappointed that government agencies in Pennsylvania are basically so intent on concealing this information. I think it’s just a sad commentary on both the lack of openness and accountability that they don’t want to disclose this stuff.” ➤ DEPT. OF YUPPIE PUPPIES

This week’s report by Jeffrey C. Billman, Holly Otterbein and Andrew

Thompson. E-mail us at amillionstories@citypaper.net.

By Isaiah Thompson

MAGIC WATER ➤ THE TUBE, ABOUT 10 feet tall and sticking

out of the ground like a bird feeder from Mars, gobbled: It made a sound, that is, like turkeys gobbling — “Gobblegobblegobble!” “Methane,” explained Julie Sautner, pointing at it from in front of her house in Dimock, Pa., in the northeast corner of the state. “It bubbles.” Bubbling is only one of the magical properties the Sautners’ well water has taken on since they first leased land to Texas-based Cabot Oil & Gas Corp. for natural gas drilling in the Marcellus Shale geologic formation two years ago. The water has also turned brown, tested positive for strange salts, metals and chemicals and started clogging things: “[Cabot] cut into a pipe that was less than a year old,” says Craig Sautner, “and it looked like solid peanut butter in there.” This magical water, unfortunately, isn’t much good for drinking. Cabot, the Sautners say, denies any role in contaminating their well. Nonetheless, the company began supplying them with a giant vat of fresh water from elsewhere. It has to be refilled almost every day. Down the street, Jean and Ronald Carter tell a similar story: They leased their land to Cabot for drilling, and wound up with their own methaneemitting gobble-tube. Cabot again denies any role — but supplies them with water, too. I met these families on April 12, as part of a “tour” of Dimock organized by a ragtag team of residentactivists who are calling for a moratorium on new drilling permits until more studies are done on its impact. To this end, they also invited Democratic gubernatorial hopeful (and underdog) Joe Hoeffel, the only candidate in the race who supports such a moratorium — and who has not taken campaign donations from drilling companies, unlike frontrunner Dan Onorato. Dimock is tiny, but busy these days: Helicopters fly overhead, taking underground measurements. Giant tanker trucks barrel up and down the small country roads. And problems — spills, fish kills, well contaminations — are cropping up, and with them, resistance. The little town has become a vision of the future of the still-young Marcellus Shale gas industry in Pennsylvania. Dimock, you might say, has a message for us — for environmentalists, gas drillers, politicians, all of us here in Pennsylvania. Listen close, maybe you’ll hear, too: “Gobblegobblegobble.” Still can’t hear it? Listen online at citypaper.net/manoverboard. E-mail Isaiah Thompson at isaiah.thompson@ citypaper.net.

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Here at A Million Stories, we’re animal lovers. We really are. But there’s just something a little crazy about the fact that over the past few years, as the economy slid into the first, then the third, then the ninth circles of Dante’s hell, the pet insurance industry boomed. That’s right: Around the same time Grammy was being told her skin cancer treatment wasn’t covered because of some “pre-existing” freckle she had a few decades back, Pooky, that goddamned 8-year-old Chihuahua who will just not shut up, was enjoying regular checkups and preventive flea treatments. For instance, according to Veterinary Pet Insurance Co. (VPIC), the company insured 916 pets in Philadelphia in 2004. But in 2010, 2,072 — more than twice as many — have insurance. No one, not even the PR guy who hipped us to this fascinating news nugget — and then declined to be quoted, because, well, who the fuck knows — knows why there’s been a spike. Funny thing is, it turns out that pet insurance has nearly as many loopholes as ours does. For instance, if you try to sign up your 11-year-old cat for insurance, you’ll be turned away: Age 10 is the cut-off for VPIC. And any pre-existing condition that your pet’s been treated for — or even shown physical signs of possessing — won’t be covered. Sorry about that, Sparky. Guess you’re gonna have to live with those heartworms after all.

manoverboard!

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[ has a vividly colored heart ]

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soapboxer Jeffrey C. Billman tells you what to think

LIBERTY HERSELF ➤ AND, THERE THEY were. Almost out of nowhere — but not really

— waving flags and brandishing signs, warning of socialism and fascism and other isms and more often than not degenerating into a sort of unfocused, disaffected rage that seemed to boil at everything and nothing. They didn’t like President Obama. They didn’t like Nancy Pelosi. They sure as shit hated health-care reform. And, just as quickly, the left was there to ridicule them as uneducated, as bigoted, as hateful, blithering idiots. Some of this derision was warranted — much of this movement was undeniably racist, insipid and anti-intellectual; other parts, hyperbolic. But over the last year, the Tea Party became a zeitgeist. The oft-derided tea baggers became the angry face of an obstinate Republican Party, all the while wrapping themselves in the flag and the founders and the principles of liberty herself, and casting those in opposition, especially those who thought that universal health care was an idea whose time had come, as the very antithesis of freedom. Much ink has been spilled trying to make sense of how this movement became the flavor of the month (answer: an attention-deficient media that prefers heat to light), and for how long the fury can sustain itself (answer: the clock is ticking). In this week’s cover story (p. 12), Holly Otterbein does an admirable job going beyond the caricature and reporting on the avowedly not-racist people who are trying to make the Tea Party influential in this urban environ. But before you get there, let’s look at the bigger picture. First,

at what the Tea Party isn’t: destined for longevity. The history of third-party movements in this country, a political science principle known as Duverger’s Law — single-member district, plurality-wins systems like ours will render third parties impotent — and the demographic tendencies of the Tea Partiers (white, old, conservative) all indicate that this largely leaderless faction will, sooner rather than later, be reabsorbed into the GOP borg. Its success or failure won’t be measured on its merits as a freestanding entity, but how it changes the political debate during its existence. That brings us to something else the Tea Party isn’t: irrelevant. Almost certainly, a few years hence, the Tea Party will amount to little more than a paragraph in a history textbook. If it succeeds in moving the Republican Party sharply to the right, the Tea Party will set up the GOP for a colossal defeat in 2012, a la Barry Goldwater. It is a minority movement, true, but a voracious, outspoken one. And yet, to a significant subset of the American body politic, it resonates. Understanding why requires going beyond both the Tea Party rhetoric and the left’s blithe dismissals to the reality that there is a fundamental fear both buttressing and drawing people to this movement: They see the world changing, and it scares them. Though not about the Tea Party movement itself, the insightful book Authoritarianism and Polarization in American Politics by political scientists Marc J. Hetherington and Jonathan D. Weiler, is instructive. Released last year, it argues that authoritarianism — and an accompanying need to maintain social order and black-and-white mores — is the central driver of public opinion on “culture war” issues: When some people feel threatened by a new social evolution, be it the civil rights movement in the 1960s, the gay rights advances of the early 2000s, the agitation against the

They see the world changing.

[ the naked city ]

Iraq war or perhaps — just perhaps — the election of a black, Ivy League-educated president today, they react viscerally. It’s not a stretch to view the Tea Party as the vanguard of authoritarianism; the degree to which President Obama embodies that amorphous term “change” is debatable, but the generation that propelled him to the White House is certainly less religious, less traditionally oriented, and, importantly, better educated and more tolerant than their elders — and many in the Tea Party. Authoritarians are losing the war, no matter the battles they win in the short term. The rest of this hue and cry about the dissimilation of freedom is but a proxy for those fears. Meanwhile, actual affronts to liberty go largely unnoticed: Last week, a federal court ruled in favor of local telecom Comcast, which wants the ability to decide what you can see on the Internet and how easily you can see it, because net neutrality is insufficiently profitable. In the Information Age, such a proposition should be terrifying. There were no Tea Party protests marking the occasion. (jeffrey.billman@citypaper.net)

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[ the naked city ]

loosecanon By Bruce Schimmel

PAY DIRT! ➤ PHILADELPHIA HAS ALL the fixings needed to turn toxic lots

into fields of green. That’s what several hundred composters and would-be soil farmers recently heard from an icon of urban gardening, Will Allen. Allen is a former pro basketballer and MacArthur genius who brought farming, food and jobs to Milwaukee. At 61, his business acumen wowed a crowd of some 275 potential merchants of muck at the International House’s “Compost Matters,” hosted by the Pennsylvania Horticultural Society. Allen’s message was simple: “It’s all about the soil.” Good soil grows good food, and good jobs. The soil farmers got Allen’s message, loud and clear. But it’s still uncertain what the mayor heard when Allen personally tried to tell him that composting makes money. Others are already cashing in. Nelson Widell showed off his profitable and pristine soil facility in Wilmington, located “within 200 yards of $400,000 houses.” Closer to home, Marvin Dixon, director of engineering for Philadelphia’s Four Seasons, documented the dollars saved by collecting peelings from the hotel’s kitchens. The compostable stuff is then trucked to Montgomery County, because Philly has no commercial composting industry. Which is why entrepreneurs here smelled money. As more of our big institutions go green, they’ll need a place to compost nearby. With trucking costs, the nearer, the better. Philadelphia families also toss out an estimated 95,000 tons of wannabe compost yearly, costing us more than $6 million to bury it in distant landfills. Meanwhile, we pay greening groups like PHS to bring topsoil back. Yes, it’s nuts. “The message I’m taking to Mayor Nutter,” said Allen, “is that composting is a huge asset to the city. It makes money.” Meenal Raval owns Philly Compost, and her business is booming, but it’s stunted. “We can’t keep up with the demand,” she said. “We need space.” Two acres would do. “Philadelphia doesn’t even need two acres,” offered Allen, who got space near Milwaukee’s water-purification plant. But Philly’s infrastructure czarina, Deputy Mayor Rina Cutler, doesn’t share other cities’ enthusiasm. At a Town Hall forum last year, she described her compost nightmare: rats crawling through rotting garbage — something that is not a reality for a well-run composting facility. (Asked if she now wanted to refine her vision, Cutler demurred.) She didn’t meet with Allen. Is Philly’s City Hall so much less evolved than Milwaukee, or Wilmington? Not entirely. Sustainability Director Katherine Gajewski told the soil farmers that “composting touches everything in the Greenworks Plan.” But it’s unclear what she can do. So what did Nutter get from Allen? After their meeting, I asked the mayor. “We want to have fresh food within a short walk of everyone,” he intoned, as if reading from the Greenworks plan. Hmm. Nothing about composting. So I asked, why don’t wannabe composters have a single go-to place in the government? “That would silo it,” our carefully accoutered mayor cautiously replied. He seemed to wince at the mention of composting, perhaps haunted by Cutler’s vision of vermin and rot. Mr. Mayor, fear not compost. To be the nation’s greenest city, you need good soil. And there are literally hundreds of soil farmers waiting to hear from you, ready to turn waste into pay dirt. (bruce@schimmel.com)

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Mr. Mayor, fear not compost.

feedback From our readers

handcuffed too tightly or how their arm was twisted, does not indict an entire municipal police department of misconduct, including the commissioner. A Philadelphia Police Officer VIA E-MAIL

NECESSARY FORCE Police officers are permitted to punch/kick/choke/stab/strangle/ and/or use deadly force to overcome the level of resistance being faced [Naked City, “See No Evil,” Andrew Thompson, April 1]. I’m assuming that the comments regarding the infamous “baby shower” arrest came from the complaint against the city, which was probably filled with lawyer-ese and asked for a settlement of $50,000. I cannot answer for the alleged actions of some officers; I can only speak from experience and ask you: Have you ever been present in a hostile neighborhood when attempting to arrest someone for any offense, no matter how trivial? Every neighbor, cousin, nephew, friend, stepson and their brother come out of the woodwork to complain that, “You got the wrong guy.” We get no help from the residents of their own neighborhoods, as evidenced by the resistance and bad press we received for removing a dangerous armed felon from the streets of Germantown in the past week. Aside from one officer’s alleged behavior, how many of these complaints of physical abuse — “a 20 percent increase in a single year” — were actually founded? Police are allowed to use force in making arrests. Just because the person being arrested didn’t agree with how they were taken into custody, how they were

PROBLEM SOLVED I once asked a [SEPTA employee] working the ticket booth at Market East what he does if a transgender person asks to buy a TransPass [A Million Stories, “Annals of Bureaucracy,” April 8]. How does he negotiate the Male/Female sticker issue? His response was to ask the individual purchasing the TransPass, “Is this for a man or a woman?” Problem solved (sort of). Anonymous V I A C I T Y PA P E R . N E T

THE NEXT MIKE GALLAGHER? Awesome story [Naked City, “Walk On,” Eric Pettersson, April 8]. My dad biked across country in his younger years and its something I’ve wanted to do ever since. Good luck to Gallagher! Sounds amazing! Shailer V I A C I T Y PA P E R . N E T Send all letters to Feedback, City Paper, 123 Chestnut St., 3rd Floor,

Phila. PA 19106; fax us at 215-599-0634; or e-mail editorial@citypaper.net. Submissions may be edited for clarity and space and must include an address and daytime phone number.


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fullexposure John Vettese sees what develops

MAN VS. WILD

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➤ PHILADELPHIA HAS HENRY Horenstein in

some unlikely juxtapositions this spring. First, the tail end of the Boston photographer’s “SHOW” at Gallery 339 — a bawdy, campy exploration of the burlesque world, done in pointed black and white — ran up against the opening of “Looking at Animals,” a more family-appropriate exhibit at the Academy of Natural Sciences collecting sepia abstracts from the zoo, the farm and his own backyard. Striking perhaps a starker contrast than nudesand-tattoos versus antlers-and-hooves images (both depict bodies, after all), the Academy hangs Horenstein’s work alongside specimens from its collection, juxtaposing what artists and scientists find interesting in the animals they study. Upon entering the dimly lit second-floor gallery, one of the first photos to stand out from the left wall is Giant Pacific Octopus. Shot in fluid soft focus, its tentacles wrap and fill most of the frame in overlapping mounds; in the top third, we see the reticent animal’s eye protruding, and the blackness of the ocean (or aquarium, perhaps) backdropping it. The warm image of this Pacific octopus sits next to a Plexiglas cylinder lit in iridescent yellows, blues and greens, containing “Walter” — a full-body octopus specimen that’s been at the museum since the 1960s. Floating in an alcohol solution, Walter is crumpled and lifeless, a rubbery tangled mass bearing little resemblance to the resplendent creature depicted in Horenstein’s image. The dichotomy is even stronger when you compare how the artist and scientists see giraffes. Both avoid making a thing of the neck, which is refreshing. Horenstein’s Smoky Giraffe hones in on three of the animal’s muscular legs, bunched >>> continued on page 25

JOY DIVISION: Helmed by Joan Myers Brown, this local dance troupe sticks to its goal of bringing accessible, joyous movement to Philadelphia. LOIS GREENFIELD

[ dance ]

THE CONSTANT Philadanco’s 40-year-old mission statement holds steady in an ever-evolving field. By Deni Kasrel

J

oan Myers Brown isn’t into high society. Sure, it’s Philadanco’s 40th anniversary — prime time for pricey fundraisers and fancy shindigs all in the name of marking major milestones. And while gala events indeed will be part of this celebration, the troupe’s longtime artistic director stresses the importance of accessibility: Anyone who attends a Philadanco performance this week automatically becomes part of the troupe’s jubilee bash. It all goes down right on the stage, in a new piece titled By Way of the Funk. Created by Jawole Willa Jo Zollar of Brooklyn’s Urban Bush Women, Funk, naturally, is set to the sounds of Parliament and Funkadelic. “I thought, ‘You know what, I want to do a piece to celebrate,” says the choreographer, who’d originally planned something more somber. “Plus, [funk has] been around about 40 years, as well.” The other three selections on the anniversary program are fan favorites — first performed in the ’80s and reprised many times since. And while each has its own character, Brown says they all bear a company trademark of “joyous dance.” That’s an anomaly in a city where heady postmodern dance is so popular, but Brown doesn’t mind. “I want people to leave dance feeling good about being there, not wondering, ‘What did I just see?’” This winning formula of high energy, stellar technique and acces-

sibility has made Philadanco one of this city’s best cultural ambassadors. “From the top down there is a focus on integrity and excellence,” says Zollar of Danco’s reputation. “Anybody who’s around 20-plus years, if you don’t have a vision of excellence, you don’t stay around.” That vision’s been explicitly shaped by the dedicated, nurturing Brown, whose dancers call her “Mom.” She handpicks members, trainers and choreographers, and plans all concert programs. Although Philadanco is integrated, it’s still mostly AfricanAmerican. “It’s not about color anymore, it’s about great dancers,” says Brown, who still stresses the original mission’s importance. “The opportunities for African-American youth are still limited.” Even so, she’d like people to see beyond color and recognize Philadanco as the adventurous company it truly is, rather than constantly calling it “Alvin Ailey-like.” “It’s probably because we’re a black dance company,” she figures. “But how come they don’t compare us to Hubbard Street?” No matter what the comparison, the company will always be associated first and foremost with its eponymous city — which is part of the reason Brown chose not to name the troupe after herself, as many choreographers do. “That’s in case my kids want to carry it on,” she explains, “[so] they don’t have to drag my name along. It’s still viable. Because it’s the Philadelphia Dance Company, and Philadelphia is not going away.” (deni.kasrel@citypaper.net)

“I want people to leave feeling good.”

Philadanco performs April 15-18, $34-$46, Kimmel Center, 300 S. Broad St.,

215-893-1999, kimmelcenter.org.


the naked city | feature

[ nudes-and-tattoos vs. antlers-and-hooves ] ➤ graphic novel

Things to do on Record Store Day (Sat., April 17): Head to Manayunk’s Main Street Music and catch emergent Brooklynvia-D.C. electro rock combo Exit Clov. They put out the Coverboy 7” specifically for the occasion, and it’s got a killer rendition of Devo’s “Mongoloid.” Follow them to Johnny Brenda’s, and buy some T-shirts from delightfully heady psych dudes The Armchairs, who open — they need funds to get their debut LP, Science and Advice, out on the racks. And stick around for Pepi Ginsberg. Have you heard the Philly expat/current Brooklynite’s husky, heartrending “Coca Cola” from this year’s East is East? In another generation, it would have been a top-selling soul platter. —John Vettese

We’re not gonna lie: We like Joe Boruchow’s black-and-white paper cutouts depicting the Eagles, Mayor Nutter and local cops partly because they’re set in Philly. So what? (Isn’t that why you watch M. Night Shyamalan movies?) If the Philly thing ever gets old, though, Boruchow’s got plenty of talent and wit to keep us smitten. He’s throwing a free party for his new graphic novel, Stuffed Animals: A Story in Paper Cutouts, tonight at Philadelphia’s Magic Gardens (1020 South St., philadelphiasmagicgardens.org). Course, it’ll feature Philly-themed music and a Philly-themed slideshow. —Holly Otterbein

➤ book When it comes to guidance, there’s probably nothing less helpful than You’re a Horrible Person, But I Like You: The Believer Book of Advice (Vintage). Michael Cera, Jim Gaffigan, Samantha Bee, Bob Odenkirk, Lizz Winstead — these people have nothing useful to tell you (or the advice-seekers who supposedly wrote to them) about how to live. But, for a bathroom book, it’s pretty damn funny. —Patrick Rapa

flickpick

Peter Burwasser on classical

He considered the late music of Beethoven wayward. ➤ THIS YEAR IS the bicentennial of the birth of

➤ album With Bowie and Jackson Browne covers already in the Mates of State catalog, you know the synth-pop duo likes to pay tribute to its idols. But what makes their brand-new, self-recorded Crushes (Barsuk) so fresh is how many times they cover their working peers: Vashti Bunyan, Death Cab, Dear Nora, Belle & Sebastian. Their version of “Laura” by Girls translates so slickly to the Mates’ keys+beats+twizzlering voices, you’d swear it was there to begin with. —Patrick Rapa

[ movie review ]

THE EXPLODING GIRL [ A- ] ZOE KAZAN DOESN’T actually explode in Bradley Rust Gray’s finely cut feature,

23

Frédéric Chopin. There is a bit of hoopla about it, but not on the scale accorded to similar milestones from Mozart and Beethoven. Why not, because he mainly wrote solo piano music — no epic symphonies or operas? Perhaps, and yet within those singular solo piano compositions, there was the work of one of the most original and consistently inspired musical minds of all time. The story of Chopin’s creative life is wonderfully paradoxical. He was an epic trailblazer, a key figure in the early Romantic era in music. Schumann famously declared, after a recital by the young Chopin in Paris, shortly after the young man’s flight from his native Poland, “Hats off, gentlemen, a genius!” Chopin was flattered, but did not return the favor. He found the music of Schumann, and also Liszt, another generous admirer, to be vulgar. He considered the late music of Beethoven, conceived in Chopin’s lifetime, wayward. When he was not composing, he happily played Bach and Mozart, his heroes. In the meantime, he was writing music of harmonic daring and dramatic impact that continues to challenge listeners to this day. Above all else, it is Chopin’s melodic gift that distinguishes him in the pantheon of the great ones. Bach was the master of polyphony, Mozart the technician par excellence, Beethoven the hammer, but Chopin had the tunes. The richness, variety and unflagging high level of his prolific work, in a short 39 years, is still a thing of wonder. There has never been a lack of terrific Chopin recordings. You can pretty much throw a dart at the catalog and come up with something worthwhile. Pianists adore Chopin. He was himself one of the great pianists of his time, so he wrote with the insight of a performer. Even amateur musicians appreciate the natural way the notes fall under the fingers. You can spend a premium for recordings by such legends as Rubinstein, Horowitz, Cortot, Argerich and others, but there is also much pleasure to be derived from excellent budget versions from Naxos and their ilk. Better yet, take a few piano lessons and learn the music firsthand. You could do no higher honor to the memory of a unique master. (p_burwasser@citypaper.net)

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but she’s always about to. She lives her life like she’s cradling nitroglycerin, taking care lest too firm a jolt set her off. Although she’s a New Yorker, home in the city between years of college, she seems too fragile for its clamorous chaos. The whoosh of sirens drowns her out; passing buses threaten to wipe her off the screen. While her mumblefuck boyfriend remains a distant cell-phone presence, Kazan’s Ivy strolls the city with her childhood friend and college classmate Al (Mark Rendall), whose puppyish crush somehow escapes her notice. Or perhaps it’s just one issue too many, an unwanted stressor that might trigger her epilepsy, a condition that dictates a moderate, evenkeeled existence of the kind utterly alien to young adulthood. Zoe, granddaughter of Elia, has acting in her bones, which may be why her moon-faced performance seems utterly effortless; like Greenberg’s Greta Gerwig (albeit with a substantially broader range), she’s more fascinating the less she does. Kazan and Gray turn the momentary disconnections of modern life into understated metaphors for human disconnection. The hitch between a cell-phone call’s origin and its first ring yawns like a tiny gulf. When her evasive boyfriend finally drops the hammer, she asks simply, “Why?” Her resigned tone suggests that knowing the answer would be no use. Gray’s limpid compositions draw plangent stillness from urban darkness, counterpointing but not unbalancing his actors’ understated naturalism. Their words convey universes of nothingness — at one point, Al ventures, “I guess I should be more assertive, maybe” — but their hesitations are softly eloquent. Kazan’s broad, translucent face has room for emotions to play out without crowding each other; she lets each minute flicker softly into place. The movie might be perfect if it ended a few seconds earlier, but it’s still a rare and precious thing. —Sam Adams

Zoe Kazan has acting in her bones.

IVY LEAGUE: Zoe Kazan plays a college student teetering on the edge in Bradley Rust Gray’s The Exploding Girl.

THE CHOPIN MUST GO ON

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curtaincall

[ arts & entertainment ]

CP theater reviews

➤ HISTORY REPEATING William Shakespeare’s histories receive few productions stateside: We don’t know enough about our own relatively short history, let alone another country’s centuries of bloody succession struggles. Lantern Theater Co.’s Charles McMahon sees that they offered Shakespeare opportunities outside the comedy and tragedy labels, as his engaging Henry IV, Part I shows. The play covers the instability after Richard II’s death and Henry IV’s ascension, and though titles and motivations blur occasionally (due, in part, to inevitable role-doubling, despite Lantern’s great cast making a spirited effort at character clarity), the personal stories shine through. Henry’s son Hal (Allen Radway) coasts on his impending legacy, partying with degenerate Falstaff (Peter Pryor). Henry admits he’d rather have violent-tempered warrior Henry “Hotspur” Percy (Andrew Kane) as son and heir. Showdowns are inevitable: Hal must shake off his frat-boy lifestyle, reconcile with Daddy and prove he’s England’s next king. Along the way, though, the nearly three-hour play never falters, with strong performances from Jered McLenigan, David Blatt, Tim Moyer, Mary Lee Bednarek and Russ Widdall as both Hal’s drinking buddies and Henry’s allies and enemies. McLenigan shines as clever Poins in a scheme to humiliate Falstaff, and as rabid Scot warrior Douglas. Kane’s Hotspur is saved from all bluster through amusing, affecting scenes with his neglected wife (Rachael Joffred). In a production where humanity trumps history, McMahon makes one significant miscalculation: doubling Pryor as Henry and Falstaff. This defines them as Hal’s competing spiritual fathers, but its obviousness offers little while its execution sacrifices much. Pryor’s smart, fiery king is overshadowed by his ridiculous Falstaff fat suit, which seems to be the only characterization the actor and director attempt: Its back fat-mounds are distractingly false, as is the thin man’s head poking out the top and the skinny legs holding it up. He just doesn’t move like a man of Falstaff’s famous girth and appetite. An actor devoted to Falstaff, one of Shakespeare’s funniest characters, would make both Falstaff and Pryor’s Henry more significant and genuine. Still, McMahon and co.’s efforts make exciting theater of a play that dares to juxtapose a brutal battle (sword-clanging by fight director J. Alex Cordaro) and Falstaffian slapstick in its climax, revealing the history plays’ seldom-seen potential. Through May 2, $27-$35, Lantern Theater Co., 923 Ludlow St., 215-829-0395, lanterntheater.org. —Mark Cofta

➤ RISE AND SHINE Few things gladden a critic’s heart more than seeing admired artists exceed even their own best work. That’s precisely what’s happening at Theatre Exile, where director Matt Pfeiffer and some marvelous actors bring a near-perfect combination of simplicity and breathtaking assurance to Conor McPherson’s haunting play, Shining City. This is great theater. But come prepared: Onstage you’ll find four characters and two boxes of Kleenex, a fair measure of the deeply sad world McPherson offers up. In the drabbest imaginable room in Dublin, John and Ian meet for psychotherapy sessions. John, the patient, is a voluble man in his late 40s whose wife recently died in a horrific car accident. He wasn’t there, but he’s shattered by feelings of guilt — and the sense that his wife’s ghost is still with him. Ian is the therapist here, but his life has a difficult history of its own,

SPILL YOUR GUTS: Peter Pryor’s Falstaffian fat suit in Lantern Theater Co.’s Henry IV, Part I is “distractingly false.” MARK GARVIN

including a failing marriage and a not-entirely-seamless transition from his former life as a priest to this new career. McPherson, a born storyteller, is especially adroit at working in miniature, and the power of Shining City lies in the details. This isn’t a barnstorming play; the revelations aren’t surprises but rather the exposure of inevitable human frailty. To be fair, much of this emotional landscape is familiar territory in Irish drama (though we should all be grateful that alcohol makes only a cameo appearance). But what heartrending, astonishing skill is here in the delivery. Watch Scott Greer as John when he talks about the expensive coat he bought for his wife, and a mundane story becomes monumental. Greer’s emotional engagement and his command of McPherson’s halting language are so absolute that he seems to be discovering every word for the first time. It’s an unforgettable performance. In the less virtuosic role of Ian, William Zielinksi is equally fine — completely and appropriately devoid of glamour, extraordinary in his ordinariness. Geneviéve Perrier and Keith Connallen fill out the cast — their roles are smaller, but their subtle, nuanced performances are full-scale. Guiding all of this is Matt Pfeiffer’s masterful direction — even the transitions between scenes are as eloquent here as McPherson’s monologues. The designs (set and sound by Jorge Cousineau, costumes by Alison Roberts, lights by Thom Weaver) unerringly complement the tone. Shining City is a brilliant, powerful, not-to-be-missed event. Through April 25, $25-$30, Plays & Players Theater, 1714 Delancey St., 215-218-4022, theatreexile.org.

Appropriately devoid of glamour, extraordinary in his ordinariness.

—David Anthony Fox


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Belmont Center for Comprehensive Treatment is conducting a clinical trial of an investigational medication for the treatment of a severe form of depression.

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Do you or does someone you know have symptoms of severe depression including depressed feelings, low energy and guilt?

Qualified participants may receive study-related medication, psychiatric assessment and medical evaluation at no cost. You must be 22-75 years old and be experiencing the following symptoms: depressed mood or sadness, loss of interest or pleasure in things you normally enjoy, trouble sleeping and/ or low energy,strong feelings of guilt and/ or suspicion, plus hearing voices or sounds or seeing things that aren’t real. For more information, please contact Vincent Davis or Ada Wilson, clinical trial recruiters, at

215-581-3900

(All calls are confidential) Belmont Center for Comprehensive Treatment 4200 Monument Road, Philadelphia, PA 19131

onpointe

[ arts & entertainment ]

CP dance review

➤ A PERFECT CIRCLE Ten years ago, Jeanne Ruddy performed her solo Significant Soil at the Wilma. She was a newcomer, former Martha Graham principal dancer and cancer survivor. Ruddy appeared by herself on the stage, surrounded by nothing but looping translucent tubing. She moved in and out of the mortal coil, reaching a place of renewal. A decade later, Soil has expanded into a full company production. At opening night of the choreographer’s Decade of Dance retrospective — appropriately, back at the Wilma — Janet Pilla took on Ruddy’s famous solo. Red-clad dancers weaved in and out of red fabric stretched across the stage as a Philip Glass violin concerto soared above, conjuring notions of fading fear and emerging opportunity. Ruddy’s work retains some of Graham’s high drama, although she looks not to Greek legends but to newspapers for inspiration. Following Soil, 2008’s superb Breathless uses dance to explore actual domestic violence cases. Black-and-white video provided the backdrop as, one by one, female dancers were dispatched to watery graves. Images of women floating amid seaweed, distorted by rippling water, were projected behind them. Ruddy closed with her cheerful 2009 Lark.

Bathed in golden light, five dancers connected and frolicked to Ellen Fishman-Johnson’s jaunty score while their shadow images flickered in step. In one lovely sequence, each stood balanced on one leg, the other lifting upward at the knee, recalling a small flock of beautiful flamingos. With her sure dance eye, Ruddy has formed a troupe of the city’s best independent dancers: Pilla has been with Ruddy from the start, bringing her own José Limón modern dance training; Christine Taylor learned Graham technique from Ruddy as a college undergraduate; Rick Callender, who also performs with Miro and BalletX, has outstanding stage presence; and Ian Dodge, impish and well-balanced, is terrific. All 10 dancers deserve individual acknowledgment — but none more than the woman at the helm. Thu., April 8, Wilma Theater. —Janet Anderson

DON’T STOP BELIEVIN’

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IS THE BEST. TIME TO PROVE IT.

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➤ theater

JOHN HABERLE

SICK

—Shaun Brady April 17-July 11, $10, Brandywine River Museum, U.S. Route 1, Chadds Ford, 610-388-2700, brandywinemuseum.org.

➤ musical

JUSTIN PERRI

The theater-bound rock musical is the slipperiest of slopes. Hit it too hard and it sounds like Meat Loaf. Hit it too soft and it’s Rent. Never fear: 11th Hour Theatre Co.’s production of Rooms is solid in the hands of Philadelphia’s Michael Philip O’Brien (the company’s producing artistic director) and actor Alex Keiper (Little Shop of Horrors, The Rock Tenor). Leaping from ’70s Glasgow to London to NYC, the story finds an ambitious chanteuse and a reclusive old rocker getting involved both romantically and aesthetically. It’s not wimpy like Once, nor silly like Words and Music, yet writer/Scottish musician Paul Scott Goodman certainly borrows the yearning idealism that made those stories magical. —A.D. Amorosi Through May 2, $24-$27, Prince Music Theater, Independence Studio, 1412 Chestnut St., 267-987-9865, 11thhourtheatrecompany.org.

—Mark Cofta Through May 2, $25-$35, Walnut Street Theatre Studio 5, 825 Walnut St., 866-811-4111, lunatheater.org.

➤ dance

BAD BOYS OF DANCE OLIVER FANTITISCH

If this company’s name conjures images of dancers doing naughty things on stage, get your mind out of the gutter. This group is into good, clean fun — they’re accessible and entertaining, lively but certainly not blush-inducing. Bad Boys’ founder, Rasta Thomas, has an eclectic background that ranges from ballet to Broadway. His troupe mixes those styles up with hip-hop, jazz and even capoeira; their soundtrack is pop-heavy — think U2, Prince and Michael Jackson. High-falutin’, deep-thinkin’ dance aficionados, beware: This show is all showbiz. —Deni Kasrel Thu.-Sat., April 15-17, $24-$48, Annenberg Center, 3680 Walnut St, 215-898-3900 annenbergcenter.org.

➤ dance

BALLETX Christine Cox hasn’t danced on stage for more than two years, but she’s had her hands full. BalletX’s coartistic director/new mom steps out for her company’s fresh spring program. “[I’m] back at the ballet barre and icing my ankles,” says Cox, who’ll dance with Tara Keating in Carry Me, a duet created by Monica Favand and SCRAP Performance Group’s Myra Bazell. In addition to works from Thang Dao and UArts grad Lauren Putty, Cox will also showcase her own choreography in the Mozart-meets-electro-tango X or Y. “The music inspired the movement,” she says. “One composer is a master; the other’s finding his way.” —Janet Anderson Through April 18, $30, Wilma Theater, 265 Broad St., 215546-7824, balletx.org.

RIS EVANS SALDANA CH SENTS MORGAN ZOË PICTURES PRELOS JEFFREY DEANCO-ER RICHARD MIRISCH ” ERS E WARNER BROS. DUC ESPRODUCTION “TH MUSIC N OTTMAN PRO ED ROAD PICTURAND JASON PATRIC BY JOHEY STUART BESSER ERTIGO BR IC BOOK SERIES DC COMICS/V DA AINMENT A WE AH AU CASTLE ENTERTBUS SHORT OSCAR JAENASTEVE RICHARDSBASSAR THE COM PUBLISHED BY ED UPON WITH DARK IN ASSOCIATION IDRIS ELBA COLUM EXECUTIVERSE ANDREW RONA N WHITE TER DIRECTED BY SYLVAI PRODUC N KERRY FOSVAN T MA BIL LDS DER GO AKIVA ED G AND JAMES PRODUCBY AY JOEL SILVER SCREENPLBY PETER BER om www.

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Invites you and a guest to attend an advance screening on Tuesday, April 20 at a Center City Philadelphia theater To enter for a chance to win screening tickets for two text OPERATIVE with your ZIP CODE to 43549 (Example OPERATIVE 19103) No purchase necessary. Deadline for entries is Friday, April 16, 2010 at NOON ET. Theater is overbooked to ensure a full house. Arrive early. Tickets received through this promotion do not guarantee admission. Texting services provided by 43KIX/43549 and are free. Standard text message rates from your wireless provider may apply. Check your plan. One entry per cell phone number. Late and/or duplicate entries will not be considered. Winners will be notified electronically. Seating is on a first-come, first-served basis, except for members of the reviewing press. No one will be admitted without a ticket or after the screening begins. This film is rated PG-13 for scenes of intense action and violence, a scene of sensuality, and language. Anti-piracy security will be in place at this screening. By attending, you agree to comply with all security requirements. All federal, state, and local regulations apply. Warner Bros. Pictures, Philadelphia City Paper and their affiliates accept no responsibility or liability in connection with any loss or accident incurred in connection with use of a prize. Tickets cannot be exchanged, transferred, or redeemed for cash, in whole or in part. We are not responsible for lost, delayed, or misdirected entries, phone failures, or tampering. Void where prohibited by law.

IN THEATERS FRIDAY, APRIL 23

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ROOMS: A ROCK ROMANCE

The Krebses aren’t well in Luna Theater Co.’s Philly première of Zayd Dohrn’s Sick. Maxine Krebs (Sally Mercer) wears a protective mask and holds her teenage children (Bethany Ditnes and Michael Tomasetti) captive in their antiseptic white-on-white townhouse. Do they really suffer from MCS (Multiple Chemical Sensitivity), an aversion to the modern world’s impurities, or is it all in their heads? Husband Sidney (David Hutchman) brings an outsider (Gregg Pica) home to test and tempt his children, setting up an explosive showdown with Maxine. Dohrn’s script, a reaction to 9/11 and communicable-disease scares like SARS and swine flu, makes these issues intensely personal.

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The history of art is full of instances of government censorship, but for John Haberle, the problem wasn’t work that offended the sensibilities of the powers-that-be — it was simply that his depictions of currency were a little too realistic for the tastes of the Secret Service. Haberle’s trompe l’oeil paintings are wonderfully detailed and often witty — his Torn in Transit (pictured) is a tacky landscape painting, exposed by its brown-paper packaging; A Bachelor’s Drawer looks down upon a collection of playing cards, risqué photos, spare cash and a pamphlet titled “How To Name Baby.” Born in New Haven in 1856, Haberle was forced to cut his career short in the early part of the new century when his own eyes were fooled by fading vision — which presumably also ended any counterfeiting threats to his country.

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➤ visual art

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[ arts & entertainment ]

[ arts picks ]

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DO IT

Amici Opera Company

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VERDI’S

Falstaff

[ arts & entertainment ]

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➤ rock/pop

➤ classical

THE FEELIES

PIFFARO The Renaissance band Piffaro never has to plug in their instruments, but they do play pop music, even if it wasn’t called that in the 17th century. Think you don’t like Renaissance music? Give this vivacious band a shot; they dust off the music and make it spring to life. The multimedia concert they are presenting this weekend will be a celebration of an instrument that has been central to popular music from old Seville to modern rock ’n’ roll — the guitar. Guest artists also include world-renowned soprano Ellen Hargis, countertenor Drew Minten and dancer/ violinist Julie Andrijeski.

Fully staged at

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SUN. APRIL 25, 2010 3:00PM

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The Feelies never enjoyed the early-aughts adulation accorded to plenty of their class-of-’80 post-punk peers (Gang of Four, Joy Division, Talking Heads, PiL), but lately they’ve started getting their due. Following a few tentative returns to the stage in 2008 (even in its heyday, shows were notoriously infrequent, often on holidays), Bar/None reissued their early albums last fall, most notably the landmark debut Crazy Rhythms, nearly 30 years after its initial release and 20 since its most recent CD pressing. But it’s no great surprise that The Feelies’ influence (and acknowledgement) should come about in a somewhat indirect fashion: The Jerseyites have always beaten a singular, laconically quirky path, from their understated, un-punkish button-down visual sense to their unmistakable musical approach — a clean, hyper-precise twin-guitar front line, playful yet powerfully insistent percussion parts and plenty of Beatles covers, coalescing in a hypnotically simple, stripped-down trance-rock that swells from meditative drones to frantic, jittery abandon. —K. Ross Hoffman Sat., April 17, 8 p.m., $24-$34, World Café Live, 3025 Walnut St., 215-222-1400, worldcafelive.com.

➤ rock/pop

Fri., April 16, 8 p.m., St. Mark’s Church, 1625 Locust St.; Sat., April 17, 8 p.m., Presbyterian Church of Chestnut Hill, 8855 Germantown Ave.; $15-$35, 215-235-8469, piffaro.com.

➤ rock/experimental

RADIO MASSACRE INTERNATIONAL “Space Rock” conjures images of knob-twiddling excesses — long, amorphous drones punctuated by the occasional blip and bleep, a Pink Floyd (Syd years, natch) beat sometime rising from the haze. And, well, that isn’t too unfair a description of Radio Massacre International. But compared to so many of their peers, who are merely the musical equivalent of stoners lying on the hoods of their cars, staring in dumbstruck awe at the vastness of it all, the British trio play with the precision and intellect of astrophysicists. Spacy they may be, but they sound more often than not like some transmission beamed from what Sun Ra used to call “somewhere there.” —Shaun Brady

FOL CHEN What’s more obnoxiously pretentious than convoluted conceptual rock-opera backstories? Convoluted conceptual backstories you don’t bother to explain to anybody. Arty L.A. upstarts Fol Chen seem to be attempting some kind of next-level mindfunk with their shadowy non-identities, fugly cover art and inscrutable dystopian liner-note letters. But I’ve got a better idea: Ignore it and just listen to their glammy, genre-jumping indie-disco funk-pop instead. It’s twitchy and catchy and the dime-a-dozen Prince/ Bowie comparisons are surprisingly relevant. Plus you can usually dance to it. JULIANA PACIULLI

215-224-0257

—K. Ross Hoffman Fri., April 16, 8 p.m., $12, with Liars, First Unitarian Church, 2125 Chestnut St., 877-435-9849, r5productions.com.

Sat., April 17, 8 p.m. $15, St. Mary’s Hamilton Village, 3916 Locust Walk, 800-965-4827, thegatherings.org.

➤ experimental

KONK PACK Composer/multi-instrumentalist Tim Hodgkinson’s legacy of experimental quirk would be cemented if he had left off after co-founding Henry Cow with Cambridge classmate Fred Frith in the late ’60s. But his work in the decades since has followed an equally eccentric path through free improvisation, prog rock, new music and whatever else doesn’t quite fit. Formed in 1997, Konk Pack is an improvising trio featuring Hodgkinson on tabletop guitar, electronics and clarinet, Thomas Lehn on analogue synth, and Roger Turner scraping and banging on drums. —Shaun Brady Thu., April 15, 8 p.m., free, Rotunda, 4014 Walnut St., arsnovaworkshop.com.


CLEAVER’S WAY Ohio’s little Wussy takes on the big mysteries. By Michael Pelusi

ONE TRACK MIND ➤ TITUS ANDRONICUS “A More Perfect Union” The Monitor, the sophomore album from Glen Rock, N.J.’s Titus Andronicus (playing The Barbary April 15), is the early favorite for most frantically intense of the decade, and Dirty Jerz and the Civil War are its muses.The seven-minutes-plus opening track kicks off with that Lincoln quote about living forever or dying by suicide, takes the piss on Springsteen’s “Born to Run,” riffs on Billy Bragg’s “New England,” exhorts us to “rally around the flag” to guitars as bagpipes, and closes with a quote from William Lloyd Garrison. In other words, “A More Perfect Union,” a song which fancies New Jersey as the setting for its own little civil war, sets the bar impossibly high, and yet it’s a bar the band hurdles repeatedly and defiantly over the course of 60 anthempacked minutes on what very well could be the indie rock album of the year.

Meddlesome Meddlesome Meddlesome Bells and Boutros, The Fire, 412 W. Girard Ave., 267-671-9298, iourecords.com/thefire.

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Wussy plays Thu., April 15, 9 p.m., $7, with The Fervor, Making Tents,

[ arts & entertainment ]

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C

huck Cleaver is a burly, 50-year-old stonemason living in the Cincinnati area. He used to be the lead singer of the Ass Ponys, who scored a deal with A&M Records during the post-Nirvana frenzy of the ’90s, yielding the minor modern-rock hit “Little Bastard.” Nowadays Cleaver is in a band called Wussy. They mostly play in Ohio. They release their albums through the tiny Shake It Records, operated out of the Cincinnati record store of the same name. But Wussy is not a group of weekend warriors. It’s one of the best bands in America right now. Over the course of three albums — Funeral Dress (2006), Left for Dead (2007) and Wussy (2009) — Wussy has revitalized scrappy, catchy indie rock. They effortlessly blend guitar-jangle, noise-pop, weird Americana and bar-band brawn. Cleaver and his co-frontperson and erstwhile romantic partner, Lisa Walker, write amazing songs about life, love, sex, infidelity, nature, God and death. “Her songs tend to be a little more mysterious,” Cleaver says over the phone. “My stuff tends to be a tiny bit more literal.” A lyric by Walker, like in “Gone Missing,” will begin like this: “We met the other day on the catapult/ When they threw us to the dogs, you were at my throat.” Cleaver will start his tales with something like the opening of “This Will Not End Well”: “Mother-daughter banquet at the Bethel Baptist Church/ You forgot her. That was bad, but I did something worse.”

When they sing together, it’s weirdly harmonious. “I’m not tone-deaf but I live right next door,” says Cleaver, whose Midwestern drawl contains a sardonic world-weariness. “I taught her how to sing like shit, and she taught me how to sing a lot better.” The band — Cleaver, Walker, bassist/utility player Mark Messerly and drummer Joe Klug — has garnered raves from Rolling Stone, Spin, NPR and others. Critics try to do the math: Just how much of these pained, tumultuous scenarios are an accurate description of Cleaver and Walker’s on-off-on-off relationship? “If Lisa and I would’ve lived through everything we write about, we’d be dead,” Cleaver says. Maybe he’s thinking of “What’s-HisName” from Left for Dead. It begins with Cleaver seemingly contemplating castration, and ends with Walker threatening to drive “you and me and What’s-His-Name” right into the river. The band members can’t quit their day jobs yet. It’s hard for them to afford extensive tours. But, as Cleaver told a friend recently after a show, “I would rather be lugging these amps out of this fucking shitty club at 2 in the morning than be at home watching a rerun of Project Runway. I would rather be out there and doing it than not doing it at all.” (m_pelusi@citypaper.net)

the naked city | feature

[ rock/pop ]

—Brian Howard

PRESENTS FRIDAY, APRIL 16. 6:00 P.M.

celebrating poetry of the African Diaspora featuring Joshua Bennett ~ Performance Poet Joshua Bennett is currently a senior at the University of Pennsylvania, double majoring in Africana Studies and English with minors in History and Spanish. A professional performance poet and the youngest poet ever to hit the finals stage at the Individual World Poetry Slam, Joshua gained national acclaim as a veteran and poetry slam champion of HBO’s Brave New Voices, a national teen poetry competition. Joshua has performed his original work such as “Iron,” a poem about Mike Tyson, in the ESPN documentary, One Night in Vegas ( July 2009), “Vanguard,” a poem about Russell Simmons’ effect on hip-hop culture, at the NAACP Image Awards (February 2009), “Derrick,” a poem about mentorship in West Philadelphia, alongside former U.S. Poet Laureates Billy Collins and Rita Dove, at the Institute for Advanced Study (August 2009), “Ultraviolet,” a poem about environmental racism, at the Sundance Film Festival ( January 2009), and “Tamara’s Opus,” a poem about his own struggle to communicate with his deaf sister, which he performed at President Obama’s evening of poetry and music at the White House. In addition to performing his poetry, Joshua recently published Jesus Riding Shotgun, a collection of autobiographical poems. Recently awarded a Marshall Scholarship to earn a Masters of Arts in Theatre and Performance Studies from the University of Warwick next year, Joshua plans on pursuing a PhD after his time abroad. He hails from Yonkers, NY. Shout out to Brooklyn.

Co-presented with the Rotunda • FREE and OPEN to the Public

31

THE ROTUNDA. 40th and Walnut Streets (next to THE BRIDGE: Cinema de Lux) For more information, contact the Center for Africana Studies at 215-898-4965 or africana@sas.upenn.edu

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SCREEN GEMS PRESENTS A SIDNEY KIMMEL ENTERTAINMENT/WONDERFUL FILMS/PARABOLI C PICTURES/STABLE WAY ENTERTAINMENT PRODUCTION EXECUTIVE JIM TAUBER BRUCE TOLL DEAN CRAIDIRECTEDG GLENN S. GAINOR “DEATHPRODUCEDAT A FUNERAL” KEITH DAVID RON GLASS KEVIN HART MUSICBY CHRISTOPHE BECK PRODUCERS WRITTEN BY SIDNEY KIMMEL WILLIAM HORBERG CHRIS ROCK SHARE STALLINGS AND LAURENCE MALKIN BY DEAN CRAI G BY NEIL LABUTE

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CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS FOR THEATERS AND SHOWTIMES

clog the

www.citypaper.net/clog

A haiku: A remake of the Brit film of the same name. Now with racial tension! (Not reviewed) (UA Riverview; UA 69th St.)

THE EXPLODING GIRL|ASee Sam Adams’ review on p. 23. (Ritz at the Bourse)

THE JONESES|CIf product placement seems invasive on your living room set every night, just wait until it moves in next door. The newest arrivals in an affluent suburban community seem like the ideal family — gorgeous, stylish parents (David Duchovny and Demi Moore), picture-perfect kids (Ben Hollingsworth and Amber Heard) — but that’s because they’ve been planned that way. The Joneses are, in fact, not a family at all, but a guerrilla marketing campaign brought to life, equipped with the latest fashions, gourmet microwave foods and techno-toys, all primed to make the neighbors covetous. First-time director Derrick Borte assembles an enticing package, but as soon as the pitch is made, he engages in a fatal bait-and-switch. Halfway in, the film suddenly strives for grand tragedy, burdening each member of the faux-family with soap opera secrets and defanging the satirical bite inherent in its premise. Duchovny and Moore are perfectly cast as the couple-whocame-with-the-picture frame brought to life, he all bored, insinuating charm, she the aggressively stylish object of dagger-eyed envy by everyone in the local book club. His pangs of guilt and her uneasy ambition, however, let them off the hook, reserving condemnation for their corporate minders. —Shaun Brady (Ritz East)

KICK-ASS|B+ See Drew Lazor’s review on p. 24. (UA Grant; UA Riverview; UA 69th St.) THE PERFECT GAME A haiku: A heartwarming tale about kids and sports? The Bad News Bears all vomit. (Not reviewed) (UA Riverview)

THE WARLORDS|B When General Pang Qingyun (Jet Li) first appears in Peter Ho-Sun Chan’s film, he’s alive. He’s also surrounded by carnage — limbs, heads and bloody bodies — following an apparently arduous battle against the Ho Army, during the Taiping Rebellion in 1860s China. He survived, he confesses tearfully to Lian (Xu Jinglei), by playing dead. His display of vulnerability is shortlived, however, as he soon dedicates himself to revenge, and goes about soliciting Lian’s lover, Er-Hu (Andy Lau, House of Flying Daggers) to commit to the cause as well. It happens that Er-Hu and his closest friend Wu-Yang (Takeshi Kaneshiro, Red Cliff) lead a band of bandits, all of whom throw in with Pang, who convinces them that fighting and killing for the government pays better than their usual freelancing. Though Pang is a cagey leader, the war-making is wearing and the psychic costs dreadful. Wu-Yang’s narration reveals that Pang’s self-styled image as fierce warrior looks less brilliant over time — and certainly less honorable as he pursues Lian, despite her commitment to her “good man,” Er-Hu. The mix of brutal combat scenes with melodrama is oddly potent, drawing some perverse parallels between emotional and martial bloodletting. Pang’s own education comes hard, of course, and Li is very effective in all modes. —Cindy Fuchs (Ritz at the Bourse)


Everyone in this family has a secret. The film opens, in fact, with Vince Rizzo (Andy Garcia) promising to reveal his “secret of secrets� — and it won’t be the last. City Island may be named for an incongruously quaint fishing village on the outskirts of the Bronx, but it unfolds with all the subtlety of a Bronx cheer. It is an Oedipal comedy of errors predicated on a family’s lack of communication, a level of misunderstanding unrealistic outside of the most contrived sitcom situations. —S.B. (Ritz at the Bourse)

THE ECLIPSE|B Playwright Conor McPherson’s third feature is part ghost story, part romance and all about close observation. That’s not to say Michael

[ movie shorts ]

(Ciarån Hinds) is especially attentive to his young children (Hannah Lynch and Eanna Hardwicke): He’s feeling haunted by a ghost of someone not-yet-dead (specifically, his angry father-in-law, resentful at being stuck away in a nursing home). More acutely, Michael is still mourning the recent loss of his wife to cancer. Volunteering for the Cobh literary club in County Cork, Ireland, he meets a couple of writers, arrogant and entitled Nicholas (played by Aiden Quinn), and sensitive and lovely Lena (High Fidelity’s Iben Hjejle). It happens that Lena is also interested in ghosts, and so they very tentatively initiate a friendship, maybe leaning into something else. The story lurches a bit: A couple of jump-scares are suc-

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CLASH OF THE TITANS|CBlockbuster seasons kicks off with Louis Leterrier’s remake of the 1981 camp classic, known more for Ray Harryhausen’s stop-motion special effects than anything else. The revamped Clash of the Titans appropriates the main characters — demigod Perseus (Avatar’s Sam Worthington) must defeat the monstrous Kraken to save the city of Argos and its princess Andromeda (Alexa Davalos) — and stops only occasionally to wink and nod at the original (hey! Leave Bubo alone!). In between the innumerable barbaric yawps there are some sweet-

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CITY ISLAND|D

a case of mistaken identity cribbed from North By Northwest. While their characters are stock dorks-out-ofwater, Fey and Carell are on familiar enough turf to endow them with wit and just enough diluted passion to make their marriage seem worth saving. They’re especially good when confronted by a host of game guest stars, including Mark Wahlberg as a perennially shirtless security expert and James Franco and Mila Kunis as the criminal couple whose missed reservation causes all the trouble. All involved are above the no-brainer material, but they transcend it in engaging fashion. —S.B. (Pearl; UA Grant; UA Riverview; UA 69th St.)

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ALICE IN WONDERLAND|COn paper, Tim Burton and Lewis Carroll’s classic texts shouldn’t be this mismatched. Cinema’s current master of mainstream macabre, like Carroll, has a strong visual sense with a nasty sense of humor and childlike wonder. But Burton doesn’t take the time to breathe in all of Carroll’s eccentricities — a shame considering Burton created a Wonderland that deserves exploration. Unlike so many directors, Burton can dream up his own world out of our own reality (the country-home purgatory of Beetlejuice, the plastic suburbia of Edward Scissorhands). Yet in Alice in Wonderland, he’s given all the tools that CGI allows and never lets us have a peek at what’s over there, just out of sight. The story is a mash-up of sorts of Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass (plus a touch of daddy issues), with a now-nubile Alice (Mia Wasikowska) falling down the rabbit hole for the second time, even though she has no recollection of the first. She meets familiar (to us, anyway) faces who tell Alice that the purpose of her return is to wrestle the crown from the humongous-headed Red Queen (Helena Bonham Carter) by defeating the vicious Jabberwocky, so that her sis, the White Queen (Anne Hathaway), can reclaim her rightful place as ruler. Along the way, Alice meets the Mad Hatter (Johnny Depp), whose accent switches from Ed Wood to William Wallace depending on his mood and has little do other than creepily leer at our heroine. Burton and screenwriter Linda Woolverton rush through the story, from chase sequence to poorly staged epic battle. As a kids-geared, bigbudget actioner, it works. But as an entry into an auteur’s filmography, it’s disappointing. In the end, Alice feels like an excuse to sell Happy Meal toys. —Molly Eichel (Bridge; Pearl; UA Grant; UA Main St.; UA Riverview; UA 69th St.)

DATE NIGHT|BPlaying a bored suburban couple out to spice up their marriage, Steve Carell and Tina Fey seem like a perfect match. The two are undoubtedly the two smartest comedians on television today, but both have been ill-served by films not bearing their writing credits. Their hook-up was made less promising when their third wheel turned out to be Shawn Levy, whose specialty is overwhelming gifted comedians with action and noise (The Pink Panther, both Night at the Museum films). Fortunately, while gunplay and car chases abound, the director never diverts his focus for too long from his leads and their interplay, much of which seems to have been significantly improvised. As in Woody Allen’s Manhattan Murder Mystery, a couple’s missing spark is replenished by life-threatening circumstances, here instigated by

looking monsters, each starring in its own vignette, but the movie is paced so quickly there’s little chance of actually taking in the beasts, and not much else in the way of plot between them. —M.E. (Pearl; Bridge; UA Grant; UA Main St.; UA Riverview; UA 69th St.)

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CONTINUING


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cessful (bloody faces emerging from darkness), but a showdown between Michael and Nicholas makes fun of manly-men business less effectively. If the action is stymied, the movie’s best when people stop talking and the camera is utterly attentive to details — of barely lit faces and hands on steering wheels, creaky stairs and long silences at kitchen tables. —C. F. (Ritz at the Bourse)

(Pierce Brosnan) whose memoirs may contain bombshells worth killing to conceal. —Sam Adams (Ritz Five)

THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO|B Based on the first book of Stieg Larsson’s Millennium Trilogy, Niels Arden Oplev’s movie elegantly delivers a story full of intrigue and ugliness. Financial journalist Mikael Blomkvist (Michael Nyqvist) is in need of a job so he agrees to investigate the 40-yearold murder of one Harriet Vanger. Mikael is aided by bisexual computer hacker Lisbeth (Noomi Rapace). It helps the investigation that she has a photographic memory as well as an intuitive sense of who’s guilty. —C.F. (Ritz Five)

THE GHOST WRITER|BClouded by, but completed before, Roman Polanski’s recent arrest, the transposition of Robert Harris’ novel is less intriguing for its protagonist, a journalist gamely played by Ewan McGregor, than for its central character, a former British prime minister

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GREENBERG|ARoger Greenberg (Ben Stiller), fresh off some sort of nervous breakdown and recently arrived in L.A., is a 40year-old frozen at 25, at the instant just after his life went wrong. The sole new relationship that Greenberg strikes up is with Florence (mumblecore actress/director Greta Gerwig, who imbues Florence with a remarkable range of emotion), his brother’s aimless personal assistant. Most films would paint Florence, the younger woman, as Greenberg’s savior, the ray of light that leads to redemption. Director Noah Baumbach, however, has never seen other people as the solution to anyone’s problems. The film, as a result, is often incredibly funny, and even holds out something like hope at the end. —S.B. (Ritz East) HOT TUB TIME MACHINE|BBest you can hope for from a movie like Hot Tub Time Machine is acting and direction good enough to prop up the ludicrous concept for an hour and a half, and that the best lines weren’t used in the trailer. Besides the continuity problems, HTTM falters most when it pursues actual storytelling instead of just making silly ’80s movie references and blowjob jokes. But it’s all good silly fun when the plot is kept barebones simple. —M.E. (Bridge; Pearl; UA Grant; UA Main St.; UA Riverview)

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Despite Miley Cyrus’ involvement there’s no Hannah Montana here, just writer Nicholas Sparks’ grinding formula: Southern beaches, pretty bodies and a life-changing death. Cyrus plays Ronnie, a teen you know is miserable because she wears black boots, torn pantyhose, and slouches.

While visiting her estranged father (Greg Kinnear, who is at a loss as to how to fix this bad part), she meets very tanned, very un-miserable beach-volleyball-boy Will (Liam Hemsworth). A few minutes and several montages later, they are deeply in love. And oh yes, they have to negotiate that crucial last part of the formula, death. —C.F. (UA Grant; UA Riverview; UA 69th St.)

MID-AUGUST LUNCH|B As shimmering and insubstantial as heat haze, the first film by Gianni Di Gregorio is an evanescent pleasure, an airy morsel that dissolves on the tongue, imparting only the faintest hint of flavor. A co-writer of the far meatier Gomorrah, Di Gregorio capitalized on that film’s success to put himself on screen as a saggy-eyed bachelor caring for his elderly mother, played with leathery resolve by nonprofessional Valeria De Franciscis. With no apparent personal needs beyond a steady stream of chilled Chablis, he’s content to bake in the small-town sun, but exigencies come calling in the form of unpaid condo fees and the building manager’s aged mother, whom he’s keen to fob off so he can split for the August holiday. After a nagging ailment flares up, Di Gregorio finds himself in charge of his doctor’s mother, as well, running an ad hoc summer home for spirited golden-agers. At less than an hour and a quarter, Mid-August Lunch is fleeting and almost purposefully slight, devoted to the intangible pleasures of aimless conversation, even the contentious kind. The old women quarrel over TV privileges and frustrate Di Gregorio’s attempt to enforce a restricted diet, which eschews heavy sauces and breaded cutlets in favor of baked pasta and vegetable

[ movie shorts ]

broth. That bill of fare, repeatedly characterized as “light,� serves as an apt metonym for the film itself, with its casual, unstudied performances and offhanded camerawork. It could use a dash of salt, but it leaves plenty of time to grab a real meal afterward. —S.A. (Ritz at the Bourse)

A PROPHET|B Set largely in a French cell block, Jacques Audiard’s A Prophet is less a film noir than gris, its scuffed-up surfaces suggesting a world where everything and everyone is just about spent. Malik el Djebena (Tahar Rahim), a young Arab with no family, is slapped with a six-year term for a minor offense, and quickly becomes the latest tool in a conflict between the Corsican gangsters who control the prison and its large but disorganized Muslim population. Malik doesn’t get to choose sides: The Corsican leader, CÊsar (Niels Arestrup), solicits Malik’s aid in murdering an Arab informant who has been briefly transferred to the prison on his way to court and then informs Malik that, since he’s in on the plan, either he kills the informant or CÊsar will kill him. Malik must proffer oral sex and then, when his target’s guard is down, slice his jugular with a razor blade hidden in his mouth. It doesn’t go quite so smoothly, but the killing, conducted in the cramped quarters of a prison cell, retains a horrible intimacy — an approach that serves Audiard, as well. Although the movie stretches over more than two and a half hours and several years, it sticks to the details and avoids mythologizing its hero; Audiard has called it his

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is a comedy that explores dating, love, marriage and family “in reverse.� GO TO: WWW.GOFOBO.COM/RSVP ENTER CITY5EXF TO DOWNLOAD YOUR PASSES WHILE SUPPLIES LAST

Supplied code will give instructions on how to download two tickets to an advance screening of THE BACK-UP PLAN at a downtown Philadelphia theater on Thursday, April 22, 2010. No purchase necessary. While supplies last. The film is rated “PG-13� for sexual content including references, some crude material and language. Employees of CBS Films and the Philadelphia City Paper are not eligible. The screening will be overbooked to ensure a full house. Seating is limited and not guaranteed. You must arrive early to ensure seating.

www.theback-upplan.com

IN THEATERS APRIL 23!

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Send repertory film listings to molly.eichel@citypaper.net.

AMBLER THEATER 108 E. Butler Ave., Ambler, 215345-7855, amblertheater.org. Mon Oncle (1958, France/Italy, 117 min.): Jaqcues Tati’s Monsieur Hulot discover he’s not up to modern times while visiting his sister and her family’s technically advanced home. Thu., April 15, 7:30 p.m., $4.75-$9.75. Frida (2002, U.S., 123 min.): Julie Taymor directs Salma Hayek in her best role, as the Mexican artist Frida Kahlo. Wed., April 21, 7:30 p.m., $4.75-$9.75.

THE BALCONY Trocadero Theater, 1003 Arch St., 215922-LIVE, thetroc.com. Pulp Fiction (1994, U.S., 154 min.): It’s the one that says “Bad Motherfucker” on it. Tue., April 20, DVD release screening of This Time Tomorrow at 7 p.m., 8 p.m.,

Sell: The locally born producer talks

824 W. Lancaster Ave., Bryn Mawr, 610-527-9898, brynmawrfilm.org. Animal House (1941, U.S., 119 min.): Toga! Toga! Thu., April 15, 7:30 p.m., $5-$9.50. Millions (2004, U.S., 98 min.): Danny Boyle’s adorable movie about a boy who finds a bag of money. Sat., April 17, 11 a.m., $5-$9.50.

about his years putting films like Father of the Bride and his own Oscar-nominated The Celluloid Closet onscreen. Sat., April 17, 10 a.m.-2 p.m., $30-$50.

INTERNATIONAL HOUSE

35 N. Lansdowne Ave., Lansdowne, 484-461-7676, cinema169.com. Garbage Dreams (2009, U.S., 79 min.): Follows three boys growing up in Cairo’s “Trash People” culture. Fri., April 15-Thu., April 22, 2, 7 and 9 p.m., $5-$7.50.

Ibrahim Theater, 3701 Chestnut St., 215-387-5125, ihousephilly.org. ODDSAC (2009, U.S., 53 min.): See Julia West’s piece in Agenda Picks for more info. Fri., April 16, 7 and 9 p.m., $5-$8. Why We Laugh (2009, U.S., 95 min.): Reel Black presents Robert Townsend’s doc critically tracing the roots and evolution of African-American comedy. Tue., April 20, 7 p.m., $5-$8.

COLONIAL THEATRE

LITTLE THEATER

227 Bridge St., Phoenixville, 610917-1228, thecolonialtheatre.com.

7141 Germantown Ave., 215-2473020, mtairyvideolibrary.com. Afghan Star (2009, U.S., 87 min.): Follows four contestants in an American Idol-esque competition in Afghanistan. Fri.-Sat., April 16-17, 8 p.m.; Sun., April 18, 7 p.m.; $6, includes popcorn.

CINEMA 16:9

Mr. Movie Film Fest: Forbidden Planet (1956, U.S., 98 min.):

Honor Steve “Mr. Movie” Friedman, who passed away last year, with a screening of this notorious sci-fi flick. Fri., April 16, 7:30 p.m., $20-$25. Princess Bride (1987, U.S., 97 min.): Make yourself a nice MLT and watch out for the ROUSes as you watch the epic love story of Buttercup and her farm boy. Sat., April 17, 2 p.m., $4-$8. Field of Dreams (1989, U.S., 107 min.): Ray Kinsella built a baseball field because they told him to. And then they came. Sun., April 17, 2 p.m., $4-$8. Living in Oblivion (1995, U.S., 90 min.): Tom DiCillo’s meta-indie about the financial difficulties about making a film. Preceded by Sphere College Short Film Contest. Tue., April 20, 7 p.m., $4-$8.

DOWLINGS PALACE 1310 N. Broad St., 215-236-9888, dowlingspalace.com. The FBI War on Tupac Shakur and Black Leaders (U.S., 85 min.): An examina-

tion of the murdered gangsta rapper. Producer Josh Potash, who also wrote the book the doc is based on, will be in attendance. Thu., April 22, 7 p.m., $5.

COUNTY THEATER 20 E. State St., Doylestown, 215-3456789, countytheater.com. Frida: See Ambler for more info. Mon., April 19, 7:30 p.m., $4.75-$9.

FLICKERING LIGHT FILM SERIES Mount Airy Arts Garage, 542 Carpenter Lane, flickeringfilms.com. Diamond Film Festival: Temple’s film program honors its best and brightest. Sat., April 17, 7 p.m., free.

GREATER PHILADELPHIA FILM OFFICE Stein Auditorium, Nesbitt Hall, Room

MUGSHOTS COFFEEHOUSE AND CAFÉ 2100 Fairmount Ave., 267-514-7145, mugshotscoffeehouse.com. The Sword in the Stone (1963, U.S., 79 min.): Arthurian legend sans the scandal. Fri., April 16, 7 p.m., free. The Wrestler (2008, U.S., 109 min.): A heartbreaking story of camaraderie and redemption under the guise of a wrestling movie. Mon., April 19, 7 p.m., free. A League of Their Own (1992, U.S., 128 min.): Two sisters join the All American Pro Girls League, a women’s baseball league during WWII. Wed., April 21, 7 p.m., free.

[ movie shorts ]

PUFF Piazza at Schmidts, 1050 N. Hancock St., atthepiazza.com. Eve’s Necklace (2009, U.S., 80 min.): An allmannequin cast stars in this thriller about a couple (who are mannequins) threatened by past secrets (brought to light by other mannequins). Fri., April 16, dusk, free.

SECRET CINEMA Chemical Heritage Foundation, 315 Chestnut St., 215-925-2222, thesecretcinema.com. Love It: Celebrating Ten Places We Want You To Love (1956, U.K., 81 min.): Rare

documentaries will be screened to celebrate Andrew Jeffrey Wright and Thom Lessner’s mural celebrating 10 organizations that make our city better than all the rest. Sat., April 17,

8 p.m., admission by donation, RSVP by texting “LOVE” to 44144 with the name of your favorite featured organization, like Philadelphia Animal Welfare Society (PAWS), Indie Hall, Girls Rock Philly, West Philly Tool Library, Mill Creek Farm, Mazzoni Center, Breadboard, Free Library of Philadelphia, Smith Kids’ Play Place or Mighty Writers.

WOODEN SHOE BOOKS 704 South St., 215-413-0999, woodenshoebooks.com. From the Other Side (2002, Australia/Belgium/Finland/France, 99 min.): Renowned filmmaker Chantal Akerman turns her lens to the U.S./Mexican border. Sun., April 18, 7:30 p.m., free.

Roger Ebert

FUNNY.

“COMIC GOLD!” Claudia Puig

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REPERTORY FILM

BRYN MAWR FILM INSTITUTE

he seems. Wed., April 21, 7:30 p.m., $6-$10.

the agenda | food | classifieds

Benito Mussolini may have been a fascist ideologue, but Marco Bellocchio’s Vincere suggests that he was also a spectacular lay. Ducking into an alley to escape the police, the young Benito (Filippo Timi) bumps up against Ida Dalser (Giovanna Mezzogiorno), and within minutes they’ve locked lips and then hips, their bodies writhing in near-darkness as she cries out in ecstasy. After his bellicose philosophy splits the Italian socialists in two, she sells her possessions to finance a print organ for the new movement and bears him a son, also named Benito. But Mussolini has more grandiose aims, and their sexual chemistry turns out to have little to do with love. Pushed aside in favor of a more palatable spouse, Dalser and son are confined to an asylum, their existence drowned out by the shouts of the mob. Vincere is hot-blooded, bordering on overwrought. Its images are indelible, if oddly romantic, as dangerously seductive as Il Duce himself. —S.A. (Ritz Five)

111, 3215 Market St., film.org. Howard Rosenman’s The Hollywood

a&e

VINCERE|A-

$3 goes toward a drink or snack.

the naked city | feature

“anti-Scarface.” Anti- or no, however, A Prophet too closely follows the outlines of the up-from-the-streets gangster movie to convincingly subvert it. It’s a gritty, accomplished take on the genre, and newcomer Rahim’s terse, muscular performance makes for a forceful debut. But it’s genre film nonetheless, falling into rote patterns that are only slightly disrupted by a brief foray into the supernatural. Audiard has said he believes Malik may represent “a new type of human being,” but his film doesn’t follow suit. —S.A. (Ritz Five)

N. 3RD 801 N. Third St., 215-413-3666, norththird.com. Fancypants Cinema: Weekly open screening for shorts — bring your own VHS or DVD. Tue., April 20, 9 p.m., free.

PHILADELPHIA CITY INSTITUTE LIBRARY 1905 Locust St., 215-685-6621. All About My Mother (1999, France/ Spain, 101 min.): Almodóvar’s Oscarwinning film about a woman who goes in search of her dead son’s father: a transvestite named Lola. Wed., April 21, 2 p.m., free.

PHILADELPHIA FILM SOCIETY Prince Music Theater, 1412 Chestnut St., 215-253-3599. Shadow of Doubt (1943, U.S., 108 min.): Charlotte “Charlie” Newton’s (Teresa Wright) Uncle Charlie (the great Joseph Cotton) may not be what Mobile Users: For Showtimes - Text Message DATENIGHT and your ZIP CODE to 43KIX (43549)

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CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS FOR THEATRES AND SHOWTIMES


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agenda

the

LISTINGS@CITYPAPER.NET | APRIL 15 - APRIL 22

icepack

[ Your to-do list, no matter what you’re doing ]

By A.D. Amorosi

➤ LOOK AT TAX time pragmatically. How bad

can things be for you if, on April 18, Black Landlord’s Maxx, GPTMC’s Sabrina Tamburino Thorne, PAWS prima donna Dana Spain and TIME owner Jason Evenchik are gonna do the cha-cha and quick step, foolishly and willingly, for charity? I guarantee you’ll feel more pain for Maxx than you might coughing up real estate tax. If these Dancing with Philadelphia Stars (at Penn’s Landing’s Hyatt Regency, benefitting the Sickle Cell Disease Association) are willing to be that uncomfortable to help others, you gotta buck up. ➤ When Bradley Cooper hits Union Trust (and Del Frisco’s and Happy Rooster) for Dark Fields’ filming starting this week, will Old City’s steakhaus have The Mezz ready? That’s U-Trust’s new tapas-y mezzanine. ➤ Funny funky art-rawk with a soulsonic twist: That’s South Philly’s The Great Vibration. Beardos David Kisleiko, Greg Diehl and Jeremy Blessing finished their eponymous CD and hit Kung Fu Necktie April 16. Opening is Julia Rainer, South Philly’s answer to “What if PJ Harvey and a beat-up acoustic guitar had a kid?” ➤ Sounds as if ex-Live Nation booker/managers Bryan Dilworth and T.J. have gotten together to form a company to book stuff in the area and are looking for office space. When I asked Electric Factory’s Larry Magid (last week) if Dilworth was working for him (like the venue’s new manager Mike McNally is), Magid said no. OK. That doesn’t mean he’s not working with him. Stay tuned. ➤ Opening Day for Ronnie Norpel’s Baseball Karma & the Constitution Blues is April 16 with a book reading at Ninth Street’s Connie’s Ric Rac. Norpel’s son Adrian’s Dirty Princess, Three Rooms Press’ All-Stars and Fire Museum label pals Gondola, Crazy Dreams and Curanderos (wooly Bardo Pond offshoot) join so Norpel won’t be so Blue. ➤ Two ends of town have re-found their latenight mojo. After opening, closing, then reopening, Strongbox (April 7’s reopening got closed by cops for overcrowding), RitRow’s Brett Perloff held a renovation/reopening April 9 with interior-istes Nouveau Image. Then there’s the RUBA Club in NoLibs, which is under new creative management (G. Rich Goldberg?), and which held a party with mission statements for film- and science-industry peeps. “Build audiences for artists, organizations and physics through social arts-entertainment,” read the notes. ➤ When Roger Waters launches The Wall’s 30th anniversary tour Sept. 15 (Philly gets it Nov. 8 and 9), he won’t have A’s guitarist Rick DiFonzo on board, like he did in Berlin, July 1990. “I’d love to do THAT again,” says DiFonzo. “He should get in touch if only to hear the last 20 years worth of my jokes. His were awful.” (a_amorosi@citypaper.net)

STYLE FILE: Blade, the self-proclaimed king of graffiti, says he’s tagged more than 5,000 subway cars. Shown are three caught by photographer Henry Chalfant’s lens. HENRY CHALFANT

[ still burnin’ ]

WRITINGS ON THE WALL Photographer Henry Chalfant and artist Blade celebrate graffiti culture with a book signing and a screening of Style Wars. By Emily Currier UNDERGROUND ART | Thu., April 22, 7 p.m., free, Drexel’s Bossone

Auditorium, 3128 Market St., 215-895-1029, drexel.edu/westphal

I

s it art or is it vandalism? That’s the question graffiti photographer Henry Chalfant says he gets the most. He’ll seek to answer it with collaborator Martha Cooper and New York graffiti artist Blade at a Q&A, screening of street art doc Style Wars and signing of the 25th anniversary edition of Chalfant’s book Subway Art (Chronicle), which includes 70 additional photographs and a new intro. Though Chalfant began his career as a sculptor, he became fascinated with graffiti and started photographing it in the mid’70s. New York City was facing financial crisis and widespread poverty, but youth culture flourished on brick walls and the sides of trains with relative impunity to punishment. “It seemed that something that had started out as mischief turned into real art,” Chalfant says. With director Tony Silver, he produced Style Wars to document a clash in aesthetics: graffiti artists vs. the city. While big corporations can flog people with their opinions through horizon-swallowing billboards, Chalfant argues,

“Graffiti introduced to the world a venue for youth, especially marginalized youth, to express themselves. Similar to hip-hop, it gave voice to people who did not have other forms of media.” The centerfold of Chalfant’s Subway Art is a piece by Blade, the self-proclaimed king of graffiti. Though his work is now exhibited internationally, Blade fondly recalls his graffiti roots and echoes Chalfant’s sentiment. “By the mid-’70s you have thousands of teens not having any trouble with each other, just running around the underground having fun,” he says. “Graffiti was a way to express your creativity because all the school programs were being cut at that time.” Between 1974 and 1982, Blade says he tagged more than 5,000 train cars. Want to know how he did it without ever getting arrested? Ask him during the Q&A with Chalfant, Cooper and Blade following the screening. Filmed during the early ’80s, Style Wars highlights the heyday of graffiti and the beginnings of hip-hop culture, featuring prominent artists and scene celebs like breakdancer Crazy Legs from the Rock Steady Crew. But the film has seen better days and needs restoration. Inspired audience members are encouraged to make donations to the Style Wars film fund and get their names in the credits of a rereleased edition. Since the event is meant to celebrate the finest of graffiti culture, Blade suggests you be prepared when you get in line for the book signing. “Don’t bring some Sharpie,” he says. “Bring me a silver paint marker to sign with.” (emily.currier@citypaper.net)

“Mischief turned into real art.”


queerbait Josh Middleton on the LGBTQ scene

food | classifieds

Sound works by seven artists, including Andy Warhol, Ryan Trecartin and Laurie Anderson, examine the use of the “queered” voice. Sets have been assembled to present the voice in a way that encourages viewers to reassess gender definition and confront notions of what sounds strange. Opening reception Thu., April 22, 6-8 p.m., free, through Aug. 1, Institute of Contemporary Art, 118 S. 36th St., 215-898-7108, icaphila.org.

the agenda

➤ QUEER VOICE

the naked city | feature | a&e

[ the agenda ]

➤ HERE & NOW Members of the Philadelphia Gay Men’s Chorus warm their pipes for a two-part spring concert. “Friends,” is an upbeat collection of familiar tunes that focus on the importance of camaraderie. The mood switches in the second half when the songbirds take on meth addiction. Making its Philadelphia debut, Through the Glass, Darkly is a high-energy rock opera that illustrates the toll meth can take on users and the people in their lives. Members of the Mazzoni Center will attend performances to offer guidance to those struggling with drug dependency. Fri., April 16, 8 p.m.; Sat., April 17, 2 and 8 p.m., $20-$50, Arden Theatre Co., 40 N. Second St., 215-731-9230, pgmc.org. ➤ MR. GAY PHILADELPHIA This star-studded affair has garnered appearances from celebs — like Sirius’ Frank DeCaro and actors from Logo’s Big Gay Sketch Show — but the brightest spotlight is on the 15 contenders vying for the top prize. Creator Bruce Yelk says while the “very pageant-y” affair allows for hotties to impress with their bods in evening and swimwear competitions, the deciding factor comes down to the thought-provoking Q&A. The fellow who wins will represent Philly when the nationals comes to town in November. Sat., April 17, 8 p.m., $25-$60, Voyeur Nightclub, 1221 St. James St., 215-735-5772, nightlifegay.com. (joshua.middleton@citypaper.net) Have an upcoming LGBTQ event? Give it here. E-mail listings@citypaper.net.

Submit information by mail (City Paper Listings, 123 Chestnut St., Third Floor, Philadelphia, PA 19106), e-mail (listings@citypaper. net) or fax (215-599-0634) to Molly Eichel. Include details of the event, dates, times, address of venue, telephone number and admission price, if any. Listings must be received at least 10 days in advance of publication. Incomplete submissions will not be considered, and listings information will not be accepted over the phone.

ACTION/ ADVENTURE ■ 15TH ANNUAL DASH FOR ORGAN AND TISSUE DONOR AWARENESS Run 5K or 10K

or walk 3K to support organ and tissue donation. Every Third Sun, 8:30am-noon, $25-$30, Philadelphia Museum of Art, 2600 Ben Franklin Parkway, 215-763-8100. ■ GENER8TION RUN: 8K RUN, .8K WALK & FAMILY FESTIVAL

COMEDY ■ GUY TORRY The comedian has

written for shows like “Martin” and “Moesha,” as well as appeared in “American History X.” Fri-Sat, Apr. 16-17, 10:30pm, $20-$30, Helium Comedy Club, 2031 Sansom St., 215-496-9001. ■ LAFF HOUSE’S STANDUP THURSDAYS Damon D. and

Danny Ozark host a different lineup, featuring a national headliner, each week. Every Thu, 8:30-10pm, $10, Laff House, 221 South St., 215-440-4242. ■ PAULA POUNDSTONE A regu-

lar panelist on NPR’s Wait Wait… Don’t Tell Me!, tie-wearing Paula Poundstone draws on her weekly news knowledge and twists it for her humorously wry standup. Sat, Apr. 17, 6-11pm, $39.50-$50, Sellersville Theater 1894, 24 W.

37

Celebrates the generations of people who influence our lives. Pro-

ceeds benefit Students Run Philly Style, which helps young people through mentoring and long-distance running. Sat, Apr. 17, 1-5pm, $15-$25, Please Touch Museum, 4231 Avenue of the Republic, 215963-0667.

P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R | A P R I L 1 5 - A P R I L 2 2 , 2 0 1 0 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T |

IF YOU WANT TO BE LISTED:


a&e | feature | the naked city

Temple Ave., Sellersville, 215-2575808. ■ THE COMEDY JAM SHOW Phila.Int.Players present Suga Bear Anotoine Blackman and Malcolm Mill. It’s all hosted by Rickey, with music by DJ Quick. Every Third Sat, 8-12pm, $20-$25, Philadelphia Clef Club of Jazz, 738 S. Broad St., 215-893-9912.

the agenda

EASTON RD & KESWICK AVE • GLENSIDE (PHILA), PA

classifieds | food

■ FLEA TO FIFTH: ST. MARY FLEA MARKET St. Mary Interparochial

School sponsors this flea market. Sat, Apr. 17, 9am-4pm, FREE, St. Mary Interparochial School, 436 Locust St., 215-923-7522. ■ M.A.L.T. BALL Take dance lessons

SAT JUNE 5

and try out your moves on the dancefloor to benefit Mount Airy Learning Tree’s “Make This Our Home” campaign, which helps enrich the Mount Airy and Northwest Philadelphia community. Features food, a cash bar and music. Sat, Apr. 17, 7pm-1am, $15-$20, Commodore Barry Club, 6815 Emlen St., 215-843-8051. ■ PECHA KUCHA NIGHT: PHILA-

GAELIC STORM CARBON LEAF

DELPHIA, VOLUME 5 Presenters get 20 slides, and 20 seconds per slide, to tell a story. Features restaurateurs, Geekadelphians, designers and dubbers. Sat, Apr. 17, 7:30-10:30pm, -$10, Studio 34, 4522 Baltimore Ave., 215-387-3434.

■ PHILADELPHIA PHOTO ARTS CENTER BOOK FAIR The Phila-

delphia Photo Arts Center hosts a book fair featuring a number of international presses, independent artist and publishers. Sat, Apr. 17, 12-6pm, FREE, Philadelphia Photo Arts Center, 1400 N. American St., 215-232-5678.

APR 18

■ SECOND ANNUAL EARTH DAY FESTIVAL AND FLEA MARKET

A P R I L 1 5 - A P R I L 2 2 , 2 0 1 0 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T

[ animal collectivism ]

EVENTS/ FESTIVALS

ON SALE THIS FRIDAY AT NOON

38 | P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R |

AGENDA PICKS

[ the agenda ]

NEW ALBUM OUT NOW! www.jakobdylan.com

This all-day free festival features music, speakers, food, vendors and information booths on environmental and community issues. Sat, Apr. 17, 9am-5pm, FREE, Clark Park, between Baltimore & Woodland aves. and 43rd & 45th sts., 215552-8186.

+ Mimicking Birds

■ THIRD ANNUAL PATHWAYS TO

APR 20

THE STARS CHARITY ART SHOW AND AUCTION Purchase work by

more than two dozen local artists to support PathWays, a regional charity that helps low-income women, children and families move from poverty to self-sufficiency. Sun, Apr. 18, 4-7pm, $25, Radisson Valley Forge, 1160 1st Ave., King of Prussia, 610-337-2000.

GALLERIES Galleries are usually open Tuesdays through Saturdays; please call the gallery for exact days and hours. Receptions are denoted by a *.

APR 25

■ BLACK N BREW, 1523 E.

special guest

ALEX SKOLNICK TRIO NEW ALBUM “11:11” AVAILABLE NOW WWW.RODGAB.COM

APR 28 KeswickTheatre.com • 215-572-7650 • Ticketmaster.com

Passyunk Ave., 267-639-6070. IMAGES OF A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY, Features photographs by architect and yoga instructor Maria Camorrato, who journeyed through the holy cities of India. Runs through Apr. 30. ■ CERULEAN ARTS, 1355 Ridge

Ave., 267-514-8647. SHADOWS & VEILS, Features paintings by Kassem Amoudi. Colors are complementary to the title of the exhibits.

➤ ODDSAC Celebrate 4/20 a few days early with the eye-assaulting visual album directed by Danny Perez. The appropriately apeshit score comes courtesy of everybody’s favorite musical weirdos, Animal Collective. Perez is known for his alien, quick-clip videos for acts like Love As Laughter and our own Kurt Vile. ODDSAC is a natural progression for the director; it’s Philip Glass going to a horror movie after several dozen hits of acid. The breakneck speed of the shots makes the scene-to-second ratio brilliantly tilted, causing viewers to attempt a 53-minute stint of not blinking. But the movie doesn’t come to International House on its own: It’s got a posse. Perez and members of Animal Collective will be there to help ease you into the experience. Even without the tiniest toke, the curious ride will make you giddy, paranoid and certain that you understand the meaning of life, man. Fri., April 16, 7 and 9 p.m., $8, Ibrahim Theater at International House, 3701 Chestnut St., 215-895-6555, ihousephilly.org. —Julia West [ swatch dogs and diet cokeheads ]

➤ DUMPSTA PLAYERS’ PROM TRASH: MEAN GIRLS For many, the word “prom” conjures mascara-stained memories of prickly corsages, tacky taffeta and a mound of hair that was too poofy for its own good. Fortunately, it’s these nostalgic horrors that could garner you the crown at Dumpsta’ Players’ 14th annual Prom Trash debacle. Artistic director Ricky Paul says he expects to see a diverse variety of drag performers scratching for the chance to be coronated trashiest queen. “Past contestants have been gay, straight, men or women,” he says, “It gives people a chance to be something they never could be.” This year’s spectacle pays homage to our favorite mean girl flicks, so watch out for a pack of Heathers in the audience testing the competitors with their heckles, hisses and bitchy glares. Wed., April 21, 11 p.m., $1.99, Bob & Barbara’s, 1509 South St., 215-545-4511, dumpstaplayers.org. —Josh Middleton [ monumental accomplishments ]

➤ ANCIENT MESSAGES FOR MODERN TIMES Stonehenge, the Great Pyramids, the Angkor Wat, the Easter Island statues, India’s temple caves, the Temple of Apollo at Delphi: These ancient monuments have secret messages for us, so say theosophists, who believe that all religions strive to bring humanity closer to perfection. To outsiders, it sounds like something out of a Dan Brown book, but theosophy has actually been around since 1875 (way longer than Scientology, for those counting). The United Lodge of Theosophists hosts this symposium, which features >>> continued on page 40


■ GALLERY 339, 339 S. 21st

1315 Walnut St., 215-545-4078. SHOUTS FROM THE WALL, Features about 50 limited-edition prints, posters and apparel by members of Taller Tupac Amaru, an Oakland-based political artist collective; members of the Philadelphia-based collective RECLAIM: Silk Screen Production and Community Workshop; and individual local artists. Runs through Jun. 25. ■ MOUNT AIRY CONTEMPO-

■ GALAEI’S 20TH ANNIVERSARY CELEBRATION GALAEI

➤ cabaret

celebrates 20 years of promoting AIDS education to the Latino community. Fri, Apr. 16, 7-11pm, $40$100, Gershman Y, 401 S. Broad St., 215-545-4400.

■ NORMAL ROCKHARD’S ALLAMERICAN PIN-UP SHOW The

■ GAY DAY AT THE ZOO The zoo

gets all gay and shit. Growl, roar, hiss! Sat, Apr. 17, 11am-3pm, $10, Philadelphia Zoo, 3400 Girard Ave., 215-243-1100. ■ GAY ROLLER SKATING Roll

around the rink with your gay buddies. Bring your own skates or rent them for $3. Every Third Mon, 8:3010:30pm, $10, Cherry Hill Skating Center, 664 Deer Rd., Cherry Hill, NJ, 856-795-1919. ■ MR. & MISS BLACK GAY PRIDE Members of PBGP crown

their most worthy representative for 2010. Sat, Apr. 17, 8-11pm, $15$20, Gershman Y, 401 S. Broad St., 215-545-4400. ■ OVERCOMING HOMOPHOBIA

RARY ARTISTS SPACE, 25 W.

Mount Airy Ave., 215-764-5621. BROOKLYN ON PAPER, Features works on paper by Brooklyn artists. Opening reception on April 17 *. Runs through May 14.

LGBTQ

IN THE BLACK CHURCH Jesus

wasn’t a hater, y’all. This workshop teaches why homophobia has no place in the Christian church. Sat, Apr. 17, 1-5pm, $15, Empowering Word Ministries, 4958 Lancaster Ave., 215-878-7000. ■ TRIBUTE TO JAMES H. BRYSON The Attic Youth Center

■ BEYOND BAYARD ARCHIVAL EXHIBITION Profiles of the gay

black community’s most notable

honors its founder. Sat, Apr. 17, 5-7pm, $20, Attic Youth Center, 255 S. 16th St., 215-545-4331.

Please call the phone number listed with the venue for specific dates, times and ticket information.

ladies of Revival Burlesque put a spin on more than their pasties in this satire on Norman Rockwell, American idealism and ’50s culture. Annie A-Bomb, Normal Rockhard, Randi Warhol and Svedka von Shotz are among the evening’s performers. Runs through Apr. 17, $15, Walking Fish Theatre, 2509 Frankford Ave., 215-427-2822.

➤ dance ■ AN EVENING OF DUETS CEC

presents an evening of duets, featuring performances by Annex Dance Co., Sharp Dance Co., Vada Dance Collective and more. Fri, Apr. 16, 8pm, $12, Community Education Center, 3500 Lancaster Ave., 215-387-1911. ■ BAD BOYS OF DANCE Rasta Thomas, an International Ballet Gold Medalist, assembles an equally impressive group of dancers for this Philadelphia debut. Combining hip-hop, ballet, tap and more, the dancers, moving to pop music, tell stories in two parts: “Beautiful Day” and “Rock You.” Runs through Apr. 19, $24-$48, Annenberg Center for the Performing Arts, 3680 Walnut St., 215-898-6701. ■ BALLETX SPRING SERIES

Contemporary group BalletX premières four diverse ballets, Thang

Dao’s “One Word Play,” Lauren Putty’s “Hide,” and Christine Cox performing “X or Y” and “Carry Me.” Runs through Apr. 16, $20-$30, Wilma Theater, 265 S. Broad St., 215-893-9456. ■ INSIDE THE MIND OF A DANCER BalletX choreographers

Matthew Neenan and Christine Cox present this interactive lecture-demostration on how choreographers devise dances. Sun, Apr. 18, 11-11:45am, FREE, Wilma Theater, 265 S. Broad St., 215-893-9456. ■ TAP TEASER FIVE CEC sponsors

an “open mic night” for tap dancers and jazz musicians, including performances by Loose Screws Tap Company, Footwerx and Tapaholics Phenomenous. The audience is invited to participate. Sat, Apr. 17, 8-9:30pm, $10, Community Education Center, 3500 Lancaster Ave., 215-387-1911. ■ TRES COMPADRES WITH FLAMENCO DANCER Tres Compadres combines traditional and modern flamenco dancing to the sounds of a live band. Sat, Apr. 17, 8pm, $16, PSALM Salon, 5841 Overbrook Ave., 215-477-7578.

➤ theater ■ A QUEER DIVINE: SOLO THEATER ABOUT LOVE, DEATH AND OTHER STUFF Playwright and

actress Sara Felder employs circus techniques, monologue and move-

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[ the agenda ]

food | classifieds

■ LEEWAY FOUNDATION,

PERFORMING ARTS

the agenda

St., 215-731-1530. ANDREA MODICA’S MINOR LEAGUE, Features photographs by Andrew Modica, who explored minor league sports, focusing on the camaraderie between players and their drive based on the slim chance that they will make it to the major leagues. Runs through Jun. 12. TOSHIO SHIBATA’S EXPRESSWAY, Features work by Japanese photographer Toshio Shibata, known for taking pictures of Japanese landscapes. Runs through Jun. 12.

figures, such as Joe Beam and Anita Cornwell. Opening Thu, Apr. 22, 6pm, FREE, William Way Community Center, 1315 Spruce St., 215-732-2220.

the naked city | feature | a&e

The themes are philosophical and reflect the artist’s life. Runs through May 7.


THE PHIL ADELPHIA CHORUS RAQUEL GARCIA, ARTISTIC DIRECTOR

Kaleidoscope A Concert featuring:

GWYNETH WALKER – I’ve Known Rivers a Philadelphia Premiere

JOHANNES BRAHMS – Zigeunerlieder GEORGE SHEARING – Songs and Sonnets …and several Cole Porter’s jazz classics with Judith Large, pianist

Sun., 4/18, 2010 – 4PM. Church of the Holy Trinity. 19th and Walnut Sts $24 door. $20 seniors, students, advance (610) 352-3565 . www.thephiladelphiachorus.org

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Girard Saturday, April 17th 9pm $7 Jackie O Production’s Benefit For The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society with The Parkway, The Prisoners, The Handsome Petes and Animal Train Saturday, April 24th 8pm $5 Barbarism, Ganto Barn, The KMX Band and Kickin Chickens Saturday, May 8th 9pm $5 Rat Healer, Hawks and Bay Of Pigs Monday Night Jazz Every First Monday with The Fishtown Jazz Odyssey NO COVER Wed Nite Open Mic ‘Original Music’ 9pm w/ Dave Robins or Abe the Rockstarr Happy Hour Mondays-Fridays 5-7pm $2.50 Kenzinger Pints & More! Beer of the Month SLYFOX PIKELAND PILS!

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(w/ special guests) An Evening of Stand Up, Sketch & Musical Comedy Free Karaoke w/ DJ Party Peter will follow TUESDAY 8PM

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BIG BANG (feat. mem. of Secrecy) Sonny Bomber, The Forecast Scot Sax and Queen Electric

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Grubby Little Hands, Sky Ship, The Soft Pencils FRIDAY 9PM Sunny Day Music & 91.7 FM WKDU present

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Hip Hop on the Main Floor House Music on The Roof House Music on the Main Floor Hip Hop on The Roof

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Saturday, April 17 Traditional Irish Music Session 4pm Michael Chance Band 10pm

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Wired 96.5 on the Main Floor House Music on The Roof Thursday Birthday - bottle of champagne and cake on the house!

Wednesday, April 21 Roy Schneider 10pm

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116 S.18 th Street 215-568-1020

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a&e | feature | the naked city

ment to examine art, war, faith and other stuff. Tue, Apr. 20, 7pm, $10-$20, Gershman Y, 401 S. Broad St., 215-545-4400. â– CRUMBLE (LAY ME DOWN, JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE) Follow-

classifieds | food

the agenda

ing her father’s recent death, an 11-year-old girl finds the key to reuniting her family in Justin Timberlake. Directed by Michael Osinki. Runs through May 8, $12$18, Second Stage at the Adrienne, 2030 Sansom St., 215-563-4330.

APRIL 24 102.7 JSE PRESENTS

â– WHEN WE GO UPON THE SEA In a ritzy hotel room, former President George W. Bush drinks, ruminates on his political career and jokes as his trial for international war crimes looms in his immediate future. Directed by Paul Meshejian. Runs through May 9, $25-$29, Adrienne Theater, 2030 Sansom St., 215-123-4567.

â– BASEBALL KARMA & THE

APRIL 30

CONSTITUTION BLUES Ronnie

Norpel reads from her “ficto-memoir.� There will also be readings by the Three Rooms Press All-Stars and live music from three bands. Fri, Apr. 16, 9-12pm, $3-$8, Patou, 3121 Market St., 215-928-2987.

A P R I L 1 5 - A P R I L 2 2 , 2 0 1 0 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T

44 | P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R |

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preview party, featuring 15 percent off all new merchandise, a DJ, door prizes and 21 refreshments. Thu, Apr. 15, 7-9pm, FREE, Sailor Jerry, 118 S. 13th St., 215-531-6380.

THINK TANK â– DRINKING LIBERALLY As-

SHOPPING/STYLE

semble with like-minded liberal folk, get smashed and chat. Every Tue, 6-9pm, FREE, Triumph Brewing Co., 117-121 Chestnut St., 215-625-0855.

â– APRIL FIT EVENT Women with

â– GARY HILL LECTURE New me-

hard-to-fit feet (under five or over 10): rejoice! Nordstorm will feature a day of expanded footwear for all sizes. Sat, Apr. 17, FREE, King of Prussia Mall, 160 N. Gulph Rd., 610-265-5727.

dia artist Gary Hill speaks at the University of Pennsylvania as part of its Fine Arts Lecture Series. Wed, Apr. 21, 4:30-6pm, FREE, Meyerson Hall, 210 S. 34th St., 215-898-8415. â– ONE TRICK PONY LECTURE

■BUS STOP’S THIRD BIRTHDAY

Hear the renowned advertising agency discuss its creative agenda. Thu, Apr. 15, 6:30-9:30pm, $5-$30, Moore College of Art & Design, 20th St. & Ben Franklin Parkway, 215-965-4000.

■SAZZ VINTAGE’S MOVING SALE Sazz Vintage, specializing in

â– EROTIC LITERARY SALON

MAY 6

signs his new work, “The New Antiquity,� which explores the often overlooked around the touristy monuments. Thu, Apr. 22, 7:309pm, FREE, Philadelphia Photo Arts Center, 1400 N. American St., 215-232-5678.

The shoe paradise offers cocktails and 15 percent off any spring shoes to celebrate its third year. Thu, Apr. 15, 6-9pm, FREE, Bus Stop Boutique, 750 S. 4th St., 215-627-2357.

Naughty Philadelphians are invited to recite and listen to hot-under-the-collar original and classic work. Doors open at 7pm, event starts at 8pm, arrive early for seating. Every Third Tue, 7pm, $8-$10, Time Lounge, 1315 Sansom St., 215-985-4800.

MAY 1

will discuss her new book “In Hock: Pawning in America from Independence through the Great Depression.� Thu, Apr. 22, 6-7pm, FREE, Library Co. of Philadelphia, 1314 Locust St., 215-546-3181. ■TIM DAVIS The photographer

READINGS/BOOK SIGNINGS APRIL 25

[ the agenda ]

â– SEEING SHYLOCK: IMAGES OF PAWNBROKING IN THREE CENTURIES Wendy A. Wolson

men’s vintage from the ’50s-’70s, is swapping warehouses. Everything in the store is only $4. Cash only. Runs through Apr. 30, FREE, Sazz Vintage, 38 N. 3rd St, 215-9237299.

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foodanddrink

portioncontrol By A.D. Amorosi

food

THE FATHER OF FAST FOOD

the naked city | feature | a&e | the agenda

f&d

classifieds

➤ JOURNALIST STEPHEN FRIED’S past

Stephen Fried reads from Appetite for America Wed.,

NEAL SANTOS

[ review ]

ROME, IF YOU WANT TO Amìs is Marc Vetri at his most casual — but the food’s still blow-you-away good. By Trey Popp AMÌS | 412 S. 13th St., 215-732-AMIS, amisphilly.com. Lunch Mon.-Fri.,

11:30 a.m.-2 p.m.. Dinner Mon.-Thu., 5-11:30 p.m. (late-night menu 11:30 p.m.-1 a.m.); Fri.-Sat., 5 p.m.-midnight (late-night menu midnight-1 a.m.); Sun., 5-10:30 p.m. (late-night menu 10:30 p.m.-1 a.m.). Brunch Sun., 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Reservations recommended. Wheelchair accessible.

T

he pilgrims have been coming for almost 12 years now, their tongues tugging them toward Spruce Street like dowsing rods tuned to the treasures of Marc Vetri’s kitchen. They’ve come for milk-simmered, spit-roasted goat. They’ve come for almond tortellini, asparagus flan, paccheri with scorpionfish. They’ve come for whatever Vetri has felt like cooking, and gone away murmurMore on: ing praise the way ants lay down pheromones, marking the trail for the next wave of seekers. Lately the path has been splitting. It forked when Vetri opened Osteria in 2007, and again this January when he debuted Amìs at 13th and Waverly, a couple of blocks from the chef’s eponymous flagship. He is a regular presence at all three — and at home, where 3-year-old Maurice (picky eater) and notquite-2-year-old Catherine (gourmand) just got a baby brother — but by necessity a more fleeting one. Now the faithful are encountering an increasingly common sight: that of Marc Vetri

citypaper.net

walking away from a restaurant they’re walking toward. So it was on a recent evening, the chef striding away in his white jacket and stubble, leaving Brad Spence in charge. Vetri credits Spence, a longtime presence in his original kitchen, with making Amìs a reality. Familiarity must have bred trust: The Roman-style menu Spence executes embodies his boss’s credo to the fullest degree. As Italian chef Fulvio Pierangelini phrases it, “The more simple the preparation appears, the more attention to detail is needed as the margins of error increase.” Concrete pillars break up the room, exposed ducts crisscross a black ceiling and metal pipes snake up brick walls. But the exposed bones of this old warehouse are a backdrop for a mixed forest of wood — floorboards as lustrous as shampoo-ad hair, hardback church-pew seating, striped laminated tables that toggle between tones beginning at birch and ending just shy of ebony. The hard surfaces conspire to create what amounts to a score of cocoons; you’ll be able to hear your tableMORE FOOD AND mates, but servers have to lean in close to DRINK COVERAGE impart their guidance. AT C I T Y P A P E R . N E T / As long as it’s spring, you’ll want to M E A LT I C K E T. start with vegetables. Any vegetables, really — you will not go wrong — but pray that there are artichokes cooked in the style of the Jews. Hearts stripped bare but for a ring of the tenderest leaves, they are fried first at low temperature to soften them through, then once more at high heat, crisping those leaves brittle and brown. They come out like overturned sunflowers in a color spectrum compressed between olive and auburn. Either you’ve never had artichokes like these, >>> continued on page 49

45

April 21, 7:30 p.m., free, Free Library, Central Branch, 1901 Vine St., 215-567-4341, freelibrary.org.

’CHOKE ARTIST: It took Marc Vetri and crew plenty of tries to get Amìs’ beautiful fried artichokes, which resemble overturned sunflowers, just right. But they got it.

P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R | A P R I L 1 5 - A P R I L 2 2 , 2 0 1 0 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T |

books have dealt with fidelity, beauty and religion; fast food should’ve been a cakewalk. Yet the author didn’t take the easy road for Appetite for America, an exploration of Fred Harvey’s immense influence on our country’s hospitality industry. “The idea was for it to work as a business book, a history book, a foodie book, a cultural history and something I’d read for pleasure,” says the former Philly Mag editor from a train tour taking him from Chicago to L.A. — the original Santa Fe railroad route beloved by Harvey. It’s along this stretch that the British-born businessman built his Harvey Houses, trackside restaurants noted for quality food, a polished international culinary approach and female employees — all things unheard of in post-Civil War America. “His company was the leading hospitality firm in the country, probably the world, from the 1880s through the 1940s,” says Fried of Harvey’s reach — restaurants, lunch counters, dining cars, hotels. When considering how taken Americans were with Harvey’s food, it’s hard not to wonder whose fault it is that the fast-food nation he essentially founded — so stylized and culinarily conscious — went to hell. Trains would typically stop at Harvey Houses for only 30 minutes, giving the “Harvey Girls” (his carefully selected all-female serving staff) and the kitchen about 20 minutes to prepare and serve full-course meals cooked to order — salad dressing made by hand tableside, fresh-baked bread, fresh-made desserts. “What Fred realized in the 1870s [was] it isn’t about whether or not the food is fast,” says Fried. “What matters is whether it is good, made fresh with the absolute best ingredients, and served with an idea that the customer really deserves the best service possible.” So if Harvey was able to consistently uphold such standards close to 150 years ago, what’s stopping today’s fast food giants from doing the same? Nothing, at least in Fried’s view. “Since trends we admire in American cooking — proliferation of regional cuisines, Americanization of different international styles — were started by the Harvey company,” he says, “it just goes to show that all our fast and franchised food can be, basically, as good as these companies want it to be.” (a_amorosi@citypaper.net)


the agenda | a&e | feature | the naked city food classifieds

[ food & drink ]

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➤ NOW SEATING Le Viet | A new eatery from Bruce Cao and family, Le

%0--"3 4)054 0' $6&370 03 +".&40/ 8*5) "-- #&&3 "-- %": &7&3: %": Open 7 days M-Wed 4pm-10pm Thu 11:30am-10pm F-Sat 11:30am-11pm Sun 11:30am-9:30pm 1919 E. Passayunk Ave. 215.551.2243 4550 Mitchell St. 215-483-3947

Viet brings a wholly different Vietnamese vibe to South 11th Street, which already features lots of pho-and-otherwise competition. For starters, Le Viet is easily the prettiest entrant on the strip, with lots of glossy wood and metal, a separate bar and high-back black leather chairs. Chef Sinh Cao (Bruce’s father) is offering an affordable 50-item menu. House signatures include pho dac biet; a slow-simmered traditional tomato-based crab soup (one pot a day, so get there early to call dibs); plus bun (rice vermicelli) and grilled meat/rice entrĂŠes. What separates the cooking here are the festive presentations, which match the polished feel of Le Viet’s interior. A liquor license is on the way; they are open daily from 10 a.m. to 10 p.m. 1019 S. 11th St., 215-463-1570, levietrestaurant.com. ➤ WAITING LIST Michael “Scoatsâ€? Scotese, owner of Grey Lodge

46 | P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R |

A P R I L 1 5 - A P R I L 2 2 , 2 0 1 0 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T

Pub (6235 Frankford Ave.) with partner Patrick McGinley, have acquired the old Blue Ox at 7980 Oxford

Ave. in Fox Chase. There, in late summer, they’ll open a German-inspired beer bar called Hop Angel Brauhaus. Scoats says to follow their progress at hopangel.com. ➤ The Diving Horse is the name of the seafoody BYO the Pub & Kitchen team will debut June 1 at 2109 Dune Drive in Avalon, N.J. Jonathan Adams will cook dishes like fried oysters with potato salad and pancetta remoulade and Barnegat Bay scallops over pearl pasta. ➤ LITTLE VITTLES Iannelli’s Bakery (1155 E. Passyunk Ave.) is in the

process of remodeling its space into a sitdown cafĂŠ, says owner Vincent Iannelli. They’re going to expand their food offerings, with sandwiches, panini and “Pasta Sundayâ€? dinner options. They’re aiming to complete the renovation before the summer. ➤ The building that houses Flying Monkey Deuce (1112 Locust St.) is also undergoing renovations, which means Rebecca Michaels’ cafĂŠ will have expanded seating room, probably by June. The spot remains open during the project. Got A Tip? Please send restaurant news to drew.lazor@citypaper.net

or call 215-735-8444, ext. 218.


Let the feeding frenzy begin. Food news, recipes, menu exclusives

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food | the agenda | a&e | feature | the naked city classifieds

[ i love you, i hate you ] COMFORTABLY NUMB So imagine you are walking down a cc street around 11 p.m. From a side alley you’ve already walked 40 feet past, you hear a female scream and cry out for help. How likely are you to turn around, go down an alley you barely noticed before? Would you chalk it up to domestic violence, tell ourselves it’s not rape or murder. homeless man passed out in the middle of the sidewalk, blocking foot-traffic: we walk by him. How likely are we Philadelphians to respond to a cry for help?

Long ones, short ones, kinky ones, your utterly disgusting an take no pride in your job! You funking re-re’s! Instead of removing the snow, as it fell, you fucks waited till the fucking roofs caved-in an we couldn’t get the fuck out the main door to the building! An one of you had balls to asked who called the fire dept.?!! You fuckin han job! Since when does it take 3 people to look at a refrigerator that’s leaking inside! The 3 of you came back twice, an still didn’t fix shit! Then you want to drag another dirty-ass refrigerator around the development to replace the one we have with. Even with two of you idiots in the

wants to be with you! I surely don’t and I know the next girl is not gonna wanna be with you either!

JUST STOP ALREADY! I don’t know what your deal is but you need to fucking stop! I can’t help the fact that I am popular and people like me! Are you mad because people fucking hate you! I hate you just because your an asshole and I think you got alot of shit with you! You’re an asshole and I thought that if would were gone out of my life things would be better! But, it just seems that you keep holding

COMPUTER LOVE Three weeks ago, but you were always in my head. you are mysterious and sweet. your eyes and body are marked with history. You’re geeky with your little KFC lemon towels and “sitting right next to me” texts. you sit in comfortable silence filling the space with your simplicity and thoughtfulness. And I love every bit of it. “Excuse me sir, I will be your candy girl, spare a dime and donate to your foundation.” Call me crazy, but I really like riding this train with you. choo-choo, kiss-kiss. Tu es beau! (don’t worry about the last line, it’s clean. lol)

SINGLE MULTIRACIAL FEMALE It was bad enough that you cried tears of anger and jealousy when we got engaged (did you think we didn’t notice?), but to choose the exact same engagement ring?? If you are trying to be like me, I am flattered, however - Be yourSELF. The alternative is that you stole the ring, in which case you will have charges brought up against you. So either way...find a new ring.

EASTER AND ASSHOLES A P R I L 1 5 - A P R I L 2 2 , 2 0 1 0 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T

It was a happier situation when I felt sure of who was writing, at least then I knew who to address and the appropriate topic/choice of words. Now, not so sure who is writing and not so sure I want to be writing to who knows who. I don’t feel like a new game. Thanks though for the offer.

My business is my business, RIGHT? wrong according to the fucking neighbors you wanna mind my business and I am really getting fucking tired of it! How many hours is it in the dag gone day! How many days out of the week from the time that I leave the house and the time that I put out the trash on the fucking curb do I see your ass and your bullshit! You need some fucking pussy and when my fucking family visits don’t sit outside counting how many people come in and out! Mind your fucking business! And if you think that you are gonna marry one of my good looking cousins think again! Your ass will never marry into my family if I have something to do with it! I hate you!

You didn’t even show up for the lunch that you planned for us to do! Instead I had to worry about your dumb ass fat ass wife showing up to my lobby door, asking me did I have an affair with you! You and I didn’t even go that far for someone to think that you and I did anything! I hate the fact that I can’t punch you in the face because I might catch a case and I really don’t have time for this shit! Answer me this..does that pussy taste better tham mine? I bet she is sour, you know it is and I know it is! Dude, stay away from me!

50 | P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R |

ME THINKS

MY BUSINESS

DAMN!

A heartfelt FUCK OFF AND DIE to you pieces of shit who went out to eat on Easter and could not be bothered to leave your server a tip. What the fuck is wrong with you ignorant assholes? someone gives up their holiday to wait on you and you fuck them over like that. In the future, keep your fat asses as well as your screaming kids home for the holidays. YOU PEOPLE SUCK!!!!

SO BORED WITH THIS LOVE I think I’ll just fall asleep and dream something different forever. if you want to get back in my graces...build me a time machine and accompany me and my cats to a past life. otherwise...not interested.

I HATE ALL OF YOU Maintenance Men - you guys are the worst! I hate every last one of you! I thought the last bunch was bad - at least they were hot hispanics to look at. You guys are the blind leading the blind. A three ring circus of idiots! They should do away with the title and job description - it’s a waste. You don’t fix shit! Who the fuck puts up half of a chain-lock on a front door, no towel rack in the bathroom, buuttt put hooks on the back of the bathroom door that need 2 screws, NOT 1! They come with 2 screws, wat da fuck did you do with the other screws? Or maybe it’s under the bathroom floor, where you can see n feel a screw or nail was left under the floor, when you dum fucks laid the floor! Let me ask you this, “If there was hair around it, would you be able to find it then?” Jerk-Offs! The floor was peeling up the day you put it down! What’s up wit da the paint, you leave hairs an paint right over them!!

world to me I would do anything for you. Oh yeah and my sister said your new boyfriend is a douchebag. I wish I could be with you again. You are an angel and I love you. Come back to me sweetheart... I will give you the world. I promise I will not let you down again. I will never hurt you sweetheart. Come back to me.. No other girl is ever even interesting to me.. You have my my undivided attention and love!! I promise.

WHAT ARE FRIENDS?

cart, you still let the refrigerators topple over in the street. Mor-rons!! You drive that ugly ass golf cart of yours around all day not doing a fucking thing!!!! You pieces of SHIT!! I HATE ALL OF YOU!

I WANT YOU! You know that I want you and you keep playing games with me and you think that I don’t know what your life status is! I wish that you would just be a man and tell me what the hell is going on! I can’t stand the fact that you are playing games with my mind and you think that I don’t know what you are doing! I know exactly what you are doing! I think that you are an asshole for believing that somebody love you and someone

the fuck on and it is getting on my nerves! Why can’t you just go away all fucking ready! Go to Europe, I heard that it is wonderful this time of year! Your buddie already warned me about your attitude, after all you slept with his mother, when you still had a girlfriend! Oh my fault was I not supposed to say anything about that, or will you become angry knowing that I know! You hate me and I definitely hate you!

I think that a friend is there when you need them to be! I think a friend stands there when there friend is in trouble and defends them! How dare you take off and now want to speak to me! Why do you think that I get rid of you so quickly. Is because I really don’t want to be bothered with you anymore! I think you are a weak person, and if you are reading this and think it is about you then your a weak person! I hate you and I can’t describe the fact how I feel about you! Let’s stop playing faked concerned and shit go enjoy your life!

KAY...AN ELF JUMPED OUT Kayleigh... Sure you’ll probably never see this, but I want everyone to know that I so am in love with you. You are such a beautiful girl inside and out. I’m sorry I left you and went to the marines. I shouldn’t have left your side. You mean the

To place your FREE ad (100 word limit), go to citypaper.net/ILUIHU and follow the prompts. ADS ALSO APPEAR AT CITYPAPER.NET/lovehate. City Paper has the right to re-publish “I Love You, I Hate You”™ ads at the publisher’s discretion. This includes re-purposing the ads for online publication, or for any other ancillary publishing projects.


C A L L 2 1 5 - 7 3 5 - 8 4 4 4 F O R A D V E R T I S I N G I N F O R M AT I O N

C L A S S I F I E D S D E A D L I N E S Billboard $ & | Adult $ & All Other Classified Categories #" & POLICIES: It is the responsibility of the Advertiser to check his or her ad the first time it runs. This newspaper can assume no

market place

!

Adoptions ADOPTION:

ADOPT: The stork didn’t call. We hope you will! Happily married, educated, loving couple wishes to adopt newborn. Expenses paid. Robin & Neil 1-866-303-0668 www.robinandneil.info. ADOPTION:

Adopt: Energetic creative childless couple promises love, wonderful future, stayat-home mom, lots of cousins. Expenses Paid. www. CuddlyHome.com; email CuddlyHome@yahoo.com or call Marianne/Dan toll-free 1-877-739-6889. ADOPTION:

ADOPTION:

ADOPTION: Attorney and stay-home parent wish to provide love, laughter, giggles, kisses to your newborn in our growing family and happy home. 1-888-350-2396. Expenses paid. ADOPTION:

Adoption: Loving parents and their 9 year old adopted daughter would love a baby brother or sister. Stay at home mom, professional dad. Expenses paid. Please call Becky/Mike 800-472-1835. PREGNANT? CONSIDERING ADOPTION?

REGIONAL DRIVERS NEEDED! MORE HOMETIME! TOP PAY! Up to $.43/mile company drivers! 12 months OTR required. HEARTLAND EXPRESS 1-800-441-4953 www.heartlandexpress.com.

Business Services ATTEND COLLEGE ONLINE

from Home, “Medical, “Business “Paralegal, “Computers, “Criminal Justice. Job placement assistance. Computer available. Financial Aid if qualified. Call 888-220-3984 www. CenturaOnline.com. BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES

ALL CASH VENDING! Do you earn $800 in a day? Your own local candy route. Includes 25 Machines and Candy All for $9,995. 1-800-460-4027. BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES

Insurance Agency for Sale. Affiliated with major national carrier. A great business opportunity! Please send inquires to: agencyforsalePA@aol.com or Fax: 866-296-7535. CUSTOM DRY ERASE SIGNS

Same Day Sign is the leading source for custom dry erase products. We carry a wide assortment of dry erase signs from goal thermometers to large charity checks. They can be customized with your own wording and graphics to meet your needs. HIGH SCHOOL DIPLOMA!

Fast, Affordable & Accredited FREE Brochure. Call NOW! 1-800-532-6546 Ext. 97 http://www.continentalacademy.com. PIANO LESSONS ALL ABILITIES

Piano Lessons! All ages, styles, and abilities ADD, Austism, and learning disorders WELCOME...Your piano or my studio. 267.455.0412 - Michael

Talk with caring agency specializing in matching Birthmothers with Families nationwide. LIVING EXPENSES PAID. Call 24/7 Abby’s One True Gift Adoptions 866-413-6293.

SHRUT CORPORATION (ALL TYPE

Public Notices

Musician’s Services

Manufacturing of all type of jute bags HDPE(PP) woven steps,leno bages. With multy coloure printing and lamination (sarkar00ss201)

FREE ADVICE!

DRUM TALKS

Edward Watkins offers instruction for drumkit congadrums and sightreading. all levels of experience welcome. styles

LOOKING FOR A BASS PLAYER:

looking for a bass player for new church plant: 4200 roosevelt blvd, philadelphia, pa 19124. 1-888-530-1999 ext 4, pastor mike. PIANO TUNER FOR PHILLY

Trained at the University of Western Ontario, Tyler Feickert offers tuning, regulation and piano repair work for the Philadelphia area. Call 215.732.5377 or write to tyler.feickert@gmail.com to inquire about services and scheduling.

Lessons & Workshops DRUM LESSONS

percussionist Edward Watkins offers instruction for drumkit congadrums and sightreading. all levels of experience welcome. styles taught- jazz blues funk afrolatin rock. fees are $15 1/2hr. $25 hr. consultations are free. contact Edward Watkins at 215 877 4627. serious responses only. EARN $75-$200 HOUR

Media Makeup Artist Training, Ads, TV, Film, Fashion. One week class. Stable job in weak economy. Details at http://www.AwardMakeUpSchool.com 310-364-0665. GUITAR/ BASS GUITAR LESSONS

Given by experienced musician. Northeast location. Reasonable. Call Toni (267) 343-8989

Business Opportunity A CUP OF MAGIC

You’ve never had coffee like this before. Enjoy more romance and a better love life with our enhancing Aphrodisiac Coffee for him and her. AMAZING $4.00 PROGRAM !

If you’re struggling,or just need lots of extra cash... Discover how to turn a tiny one time, $4.00 into $335.00 daily (7 days a week) $4,032.00 every 12 days!! You get to do this with No recruiting, No phone calls, No emails, No products to buy or sell, and it’s already set up to pay you each and every day!!

BIRTHDAY PARTY ORGANIZERS

We have all the arrangements for Theme Birthday parties’ right from the selection of Venue,Balloon DÊcor, Theme DÊcor, Kids Rides, Kids Entertainment, Bouncy, Magic Shows, Puppet Shows,Birthday Caps, Masks, Khoi Bag, Birthday Banners, Game Coordinators, Return Gifts, Birthday Cake,Kids Menu, Adult Menu and Dance Entertainment to Digital Studio etc. Contact No.: +91-9210222550 Email: javed_khan1982@yahoo.com (SARKAR00SS231) EARN UP TO RS.15,000/PM

Earn up to Rs. 15,000 per month Website http://www. prithviutility.com Contact :0265-2354701/2351506, Email : prithvi.anurag@gmail. com (Prithvi19) through simple online copy/paste work.100% Legitimate, Genuine & Scam Free Online Copy/Paste Jobs. Work at Home in your spare time. No work load, No Time Limit. Daily Basis Payment. EXCEL COMPUTER SERVICES

W E A R E P ROV I D I N G NEW COMPUTER WITH LCD MONITOR ONLY AT RS.12500 WITH 1 YEAR WARRANTY AND SERVICE + 2GB PENDRIVE CUM CARD READER TOTALLY FREE... Contact No.: +91-9820847750 Email: excel_1980@yahoo. com (SARKAR00SS232) HELP WANTED

Between High School and College? Over 18? Drop that entry level position! Earn what you’re worth!! Travel w/Young Successful Business Group. Paid Training. Transportation, Lodging Provided. Call 1-877646-5050. MAKE EXTRA MONEY FOR FREE !

Make Money by getting paid to browse and click on ads. You get paid for each ad you view.You can actually get paid up to $5.00 for every 30 seconds you work. Begin earning money immediately. PRITHVI13- EARN RS 15000 PM

Earn up to Rs.15,000 per month Website http://www.prithviutility.com Contact :02652354701/2351506, Email : prithvi.anurag@gmail.com (Prithvi13) through simple online copy/paste work.100% Legitimate, Genuine & Scam Free Online Copy/Paste Jobs. Work at Home in your spare time. No work load, No Time Limit. Daily Basis Payment

*SMC HOME BUSINESS OPP

Work from home with SMC and earn full time pay working part time hours. Get started today http://minyurl.org/smc YOU’VE NEVER HAD COFFEE LIK

Make Money and enjoy more romance and a better love life with our enhancing Aphrodisiac Coffee for him and her.

Investments/ Financial Planning FINANCIAL

CASH NOW! Get cash for your structured settlement or annuity payments. High payouts. Call J.G. Wentworth. 1-866SETTLEMENT (1-866-7388536). Rated A+ by the Better Business Bureau.

Home Services *FREE SENIOR SERVICE FINDER

Find local, experienced senior care today including nursing homes, residential communities, home health services and more. This service is free. http://minyurl.org/seniorcare PERMANENT HAIR REMOVAL

1-888-722-0011, Electrolysis / Permanent hair removal, Over 25 years experience with offices in Philadelphia & South Jersey. Also Available: Facials, Glycolic skin peels, Medicinal skin care for acne, sun spots, and other skin conditions. Call for your free consultation. RELIABLE HOUSE SITTER

Reliable, Responsible, neat freak housesitter, can provide refences and a spotless background check. ISO a home in the Philadelphia or Princeton metro areas from 6/1/10 until 9/1/10 to care for while the owner is away. Pets OK. Fees open to what you are comfortable with. 267-595-3082/ 215-609-4495

FREE HOME ALARM SYSTEM!

A new burglary occurs every 14 seconds in the US. Want to protect yourself? www.getfreegealarm.info LED LIGHTING BY PEKASYS

Switching to LED Lighting in your home can save you 20% on your electricity bills each month! LED Light Bulbs only need 10% of the electricity to produce the same amount of light as regular light bulbs, and they also last 50 times longer. Learn more about LED Lighting at marketplace.pekasys. com. STRIPED BASS POLO SHIRT

The striper are running!!! Classic striped bass polo shirt with oxford patch. Great for boating, golf, poolside, beach, gifts and fishing sizes: XXL, XL, L, M, S $17 + S&H shop online at: www.TheHudsonRiverShop.com TERRA COTTA DRAIAGE PIPES

For Sale: large lot of terra cotta drainage pipes. Lengths and fittings, 4�, 6� and some other sizes. Approximately 125 pieces. Contact me via email: hangglides@yahoo.com, or call me: 215 3328907.

Health Services PERMANENT HAIR REMOVAL

1-888-722-0011, Electrolysis / Permanent hair removal, Over 25 years experience with offices in Philadelphia & South Jersey. Also Available: Facials, Glycolic skin peels, Medicinal skin care for acne, sun spots, and other skin conditions. Call for your free consultation. PIANO LESSONS ALL ABILITIES

Piano Lessons! All ages, styles, and abilities ADD, Austism, and learning disorders WELCOME...Your piano or my studio. 267.455.0412 - Michael

!

jobs

Diane Cooks For You April’s Featured Products: Spring into savings with my featured products: SPRING COOKIES: Thumbprint cookies, Pressed Sugar Cookies with pastel sprinkles, Linzer cookies, Springtime Tea Cookies or Springtime Strawberry Bars. $4.00/dozen. Special Price good until 4/40/10. Call 610419-2099 or go to: http://www. dianecooksforyou.com DIRT-CHEAP HANDSFREE DEVICE

How can you go wrong for $20! Basically, you just preset 99.3FM into your car radio and at the push of a button you have an instant hands free cell phone device for the fraction of the price. Jupiter Jack is the

HELP WANTED

ABLE TO TRAVEL: National Company Hiring Shar p People. Able to start today. Transpor tation & Lodging Furnished. NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY. Paid Training. Over 18+ 866-734-5216 www. greenstreetsolutions.com. HELP WANTED

AMAZING OPPORTUNITY! Looking for 10 SHARP guys and gals to Represent Fashion & Music Publications. Must be Free to travel. No Experience Necessary. 888-297-4698. HELP WANTED

Local Reliable Typist Needed Immediately. $400 Part-Time, $800+ Fulltime Weekly. Flexible schedule. Type on your own Computer, training provided. 1-800-341-2673. $$$ HELP WANTED $$$

Extra Income! Assembling CD cases from Home! No Experience Necessary! Call our Live Operators Now! 1-800-4057619 EXT 2450 http://www. easywork-greatpay.com. HELP WANTED DRIVER

A-CDL Drivers: Hiring OTR Company Drivers & Independent Contractors east of I-81. Home Weekly. Requires 1 year T/T experience. EPES TRANSPORT 877-761-1414. www.epestranport.com. HELP WANTED DRIVER

CDL-A Drivers: Our Freight Needs You! OTR Flatbed & Dry Van. High Miles, Great Runs, Good Driving Record Required. Western Express. Call Nancy 888-801-5295. HELP WANTED DRIVER

Help Wanted – Regional TRAVEL AND E-COMMERCE NATIONAL COMPANY EXPANDING IN PHILADELPHIA AREA.

Financially ambitious, entrepreneurial, people oriented. Contact: chardatravel@verizon.net or 941 493 2226.

Help Wanted – General

$$$HELP WANTED$$$

Extra Income! Assembling CD cases from Home! No Experience Necessary! Call our Live Operator Now! 1-800-4057619 Ext. 2450 http://www. easywork-greatpay.com

real estate

!

Homes for Sale EVERYHOME.COM HOMES FOR SALE

FORECLOSED HOME AUCTION 90+ Homes 1 Auction: 4/29/. Open House: April 17, 24 & 25. REDC 1 View Full Listings: www.Auction.com RE Brkr SB065259.

Condos for Sale NORTHERN LIBERTIES AREA

Friends Housing Cooperative. 2 bedroom Co-op Apt. Total Price $4230. Mtly Chg.$818. Call 215-922-4622. Free Gas, Elec. and Hot Water. Free offstreet parking. Laundry on premises. Pets OK. Close to Center City, Two Street and Temple U.

Commercial/ Warehouse for Sale MASSAGE CENTER FOR SALE

Driver-CURRENTLY HIRING Exper ienced Teams and Solos with Hazmat. Dry Van & Temp Control available. O/O’s welcome. Call Covenant. (866) 684-2519 or apply at www.covenantdrivers.com Equal Opportunity Employer.

located in old city 19106 Reasonably priced. Great location! Opportunity won’t last much longer. Email: tang1025@aol. com or call 215 922 2325

HELP WANTED DRIVER

Train for high paying Aviation Maintenance Career. FAA approved program. Financial aid if qualified-Housing available. CALL Aviation Institute of Maintenance (888) 8349715.

DRIVER: FFE seeks Eastern PA based driver for a dedicated regional run. Class A CDL & 1yr. Exp. Req. Apply online: www.ffejobs.com or call 214-819-5680. HELP WANTED DRIVER

For Sale DIANE COOKS FOR YOU SPECIAL

General Dentists needed to work in busy Pennsylvania practice locations. Pd malpractice, health & sign-on bonus for cer tain locations Send CV to cjpatterson@ kosservices.com

We’ve Expanded to Milton, PA! Class-A CDL drivers needed! Practical Mile Pay. Great Benefits Guaranteed Home-Time. Strong, Stable & Safe 1 year OTR experience required www.veriha.com 800-333-9291.

Drivers: REGIONAL COMPANY DRIVERS. Home Weekly. Competitive Pay. Immediate Benefits. CDL-A with 1 year experience, 23 yoa. Call NFI Sunday or anytime: 877-8888476, www.nficareers.com. HELP WANTED DRIVER

REGIONAL DRIVERS NEEDED! MORE HOMETIME! TOP PAY! Up to $.43/mile company drivers! 12 months OTR required. HEARTLAND EXPRESS 1800-441-4953. www.heartlandexpress.com.

Land/ Lots for Sale AIRLINES ARE HIRING:

LAND FOR SALE

LAND DEALS OF A LIFETIME Adirondack Raging River- 19 Acre Tract WAS $119,995 NOW: $59,995! 5 Acres w/New Rustic Camp$19,995. Call now to hear more! 800-229-7843 www. LandandCamps.com. LAND FOR SALE

One Time Sale NYS LAND BARGAINS 40 Acres w/Camp Borders State Land- $69,995. 5 Acre Camp Lot-$10,995. 5 Acres w/New Cabin-$19,995. Over 50 new land bargains.

DANCERS

Work for the only Upscale Gentlemen’s Club in Atlantic City. We cater to the Casino’s a n d C o nve n t i o n C e n t e r visitors. Earn up to $2,500 weekly. Website: www.allureatlantic-

GENTLY MOVING YOUR EARTHLY POSSESSIONS

215.670.9535

www.mambomovers.com

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We’ll Help You Choose a Program or Degree to get your career & life on Track. Call Collegebound Network Today! 1-877-461-5940.

taught are.....jazz funk blues rock afrolatin. fees are $15 1/2hr. $25 hr. there is no charge for consultations. call Edward Watkins at 215 877 4627. serious responses only.

Manufacturing of all type of jute bags HDPE(PP) woven steps,leno bages. With multy coloure printing and lamination (sarkar00ss216)Email: shrut_corporation@yahoo. com Contact Number: +919328050500

RESTAURANT EQUIPMENT FOR SALE! 215-432-0945. CALL FOR DETAILS!!

DENTISTS NEEDED

HELP WANTED DRIVER

P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R | A P R I L 1 5 - A P R I L 2 2 , 2 0 1 0 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T |

ADOPTION- BirthmotherWe’ll care about you as you get to know us...open-minded married couple hoping to become adoptive parents. Living expenses paid. Confidential. Legal. Lisa & Miles @ 888324-8934 or lisa@mileslisa. com.

HELP WANTED DRIVER

SHRUT CORPORATION (ALL TYPE

FOR SALE

city.com For an interview: 484-2396666

classifieds

responsibility for errors beyond the first printing of the incorrect ad. City Paper will not be responsible for failure to insert an advertisement. City Paper reserves the right to edit advertising copy, graphics and photos.

23 people needed immediately.No experience needed. Earn up to $5000 a month. Earn as you learn plus paid vacations.

affordable solution to remaining legal and preserving the safety of your family and the public. http://www.buy-jupiterjack.com

the naked city | feature | a&e | the agenda | food

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PUT YOUR PC TO WORK FOR YOU


food | the agenda | a&e | feature | the naked city classifieds

Call for details 800-229-7843 Or visit www.LandandCamps. com.

Moorestown Real Estate, LLC Licensed NJ & PA Department of Banking

Real Estate Wanted FOOT MASSAGE SERVICE

30 YEAR FIXED 4.9% APR – 0 POINTS • 15 YEAR FIXED 4.3% APR – 0 POINTS No Application Fee • No Broker Fee • No Upfront Costs • 21 Day Close

FOOT MASSAGE SERVICE Foot Massage for a man by a man. Private massage with release in my home studio. $60. Deep Tissue foot massage with lotion for total relaxation. Call for appointment. Available 24 Hours. 215 806 5860

!

rentals

Apartments for Rent APARTMENT FOR RENT

145 N. 9th Street(Center City), Two Bedrooms, Good size of living room, One full Bathroom and One Kitchen, Kitchen with garbage disposal,Washer and Dryer. Central heat and central air. Contact# 610-382-8009 (day time) APARTMENTS FOR RENT

Move up to Mt Airy, trade concrete for trees. Large bright apartments, near Manayunk and Chestnut Hill. 15 min to Center City. Oak parquet floors, modern European kitchens, A/C, laundry, DSL & Cable available. On site super, easy parking. Studio, 1 & 2 Bedrooms available. Rent includes heat. 215-438-1076 or info@cliveden.net Check out floor plans & pix at www. cliveden.net NEW TEMPLE APARTMENTS

We have brand new apartments currently being built for Fall 2010. Apartments are either on campus or within walking distance. We have about 15 locations that we are looking for renters. 2 person/3 person/ 4 person/ 5 person. Please email bibgripladies@ aol.com for a list of prices and locations. Thank you.

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A P R I L 1 5 - A P R I L 2 2 , 2 0 1 0 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T

NORTHERN LIBERTIES

1126 C Oniel. 2 bedroom, A/C, W/D, D/W, Hardwood Floors, Intercom, Private Courtyard. One block from the Piazza $900 + Utilities. (610) 3580723 NORTHERN LIBERTIES

Utilities paid! Hardwood floors, parking, appliances pets ok 500’s

Studio/ Efficiency RITTENHOUSE SQUARE

Lovely Studio in Beautiful Brownstone, Block to Rittenhouse Sq, New Kitchen, HW Flrs, Onsite Laundry, Intercom Entry. Ask About Move-in Discounts! $875/Mo. 215-7358030. # 216850 ROOMS FOR RENT NORTH PHILLY

Room for Rent in North Philly Newly renov-rooms w/ Cental Air & New carpet. Freshly painted. Utilities incl. No pets. $110.00 Weekly Very clean and cable TV /phone ready rooms. Contact No# 215.882.0791 Any time TEMPLE AREA ROOMS + EFFIEC

Nicely maintained clean boarding house has -Furnished Rooms for rent $100.00 a week. -Furnished

Room With kitchen 140.00 a week. -�Small� 3 room efficiency furnished or unfurnished. kitchen bath and bdrm/lvg area $575.00 a mth utilities included.Call 215 803 1189 Sylvia.

One Bedroom 15TH/SPRUCE

Beautiful Art Deco High-rise 1Bdrm Apt, Desk Attendant, HW Flrs, Updated Kitch, Onsite Laundry, Intercom Entry, Amazing Location!. From $1080/Mo. 215-735-8030. Ask About Move-in Discounts! Lic #219789. 1BD RM 21ST & INDIANA

**SPECIAL** Newly Renovated Bldg *1Bd RM’S starting at $585.00 & $600.00 a month plus utilities/owner pays water.Quiet area.call Sylvia 215 803 1189 NORTHERN LIBERTIES

Extremely Large Bi-level 1 Bedroom, 1 and 1/2 baths, W/D, Hardwood Floors, eat in kitchen, high ceilings, private back yard with overlooking deck... $975 + utilities. 856 985-8357 NORTHERN LIBERTIES AREA

Friends Housing Cooperative rental. Gated community. $850 includes gas, heat and hot water. Call 215-922-4622. Laundr y on-site. Free off street parking. Free storage. Pets OK.

Two Bedrooms 2 BEDROOM, 1 BATH HOUSE

Avenue of the Arts / Italian Market/ Passyunk Square area. 1 Block to Broad Street. W/D, Spiral Stairs, Patio off Kitchen. No pets. $1300.00 A Month + Security. 267-7678750 AVE. OF THE ARTS 2 BED ROOM

Townhouse,yard W/D+ $1,195 e-mail me bpol51@aol.com NORTHERN LIBERTIES

1126 C Oniel. 2 bedroom, A/C, W/D, D/W, Hardwood Floors, Intercom, Private Courtyard. One block from the Piazza $900 + Utilities. (610) 358-0723

Three+ Bedrooms AVENUE OF THE ARTS

PENTHOUSE Avail! One of a kind spacious bi-level penthouse in historic Art Deco High-Rise, 3bdrms/ 3 Full Baths/ 2 half baths, 4 Lrg Terraces w/Amazing City Views, Entertainment Rm w/ Wet Bar, New Kitch w/ Granite Countertops, W/D, CA, Vaulted Ceilings, HW Flrs. Avail Sept. $4300/Mo. 215-735-8030 TEMPLE MEDICAL SCHOOL AREA

Two Blocks from Temple Medical School 3 large bedrooms Washer/Dryer Eat in kitchen, dishwasher, Large Living room hardwood Floors First, and 1 month security please contact 610-696-9062 email topcatwc@hotmail.com Walking distance to Temple Medical School, Temple Shuttle, R7, Rite-aid, banks TEMPLE UNIVERSTIY AREA

Two Blocks from Temple Medical Schoolplease contact 610-696-9062 3 large bedrooms Washer/Dryer Eat in kitchen, dishwasher, Large Living room hardwood Floors First, Last, and 1 month security

email topcatwc@hotmail.com Walking distance to Temple Medical School, Temple Shuttle, R7, Rite-aid, banks

utilities paid! Patio $700 LOCATORS 215-922-3400 SOUTHWEST

Sublets

4 bedroom, no credit check! Utilities paid! Patio $700 LOCATORS 215-922-3400

UNIVERSITY CITY SUMMER/FALL

SOUTHWEST PHILADELPHIA

Roommates wanted for Summer and Fall 2010. 5 bedrooms available for summer 3 bedrooms for August/ September through December. 7 Bedroom house. Spacious living room, dining room, kitchen. Newly renovated kitchen. dishwasher. Porch, Backyard, Basement. Washer/Dryer. Furnished. Quiet street. 2 Blocks form UPenn Campus. $662/month.

Homes BELLA VISTA (HOUSE)

3 bedrooms, 1st floor modern kitchen, living room, dinning and power room, laundry room w/washer & dryer. With a backyard. 2nd has 3bd and bath. Walking distance to Center City, Italian Market, bank, Acme, Superfresh, Whole Foods & Rite Aid. Close to public transportation. Available May 1, 2010. Rent is $1,800 heat is included. 215-755-4856. HOUSES FOR RENT

Browse thousands of rental listings with photos and maps. Advertise your rental home for FREE! Visit: http://www.RealRentals.com. NEWLY REMODELED!

2 bedroom,carpeted, new cabinet, appliances which includes refrigerator, dishwasher garbage disposal, washer and dryer in the basement, back yard. NO PETS. $1000 a month + utilities. 215-755-8643. Ask for Julia. Vicinity 10th & Snyder. NORTH PHILADELPHIA

4 bedroom 2 story house, fee paid! Parking, office $800 LOCATORS 215-922-3400 NORTH PHILADELPHIA

4 bedroom, 2 story, fee paid! basement, fenced yard, office! $800 LOCATORS INC 215-922-3400 OAK LANE

4 bedroom 2 story house, yard, basement, parking, washer/ dryer, patio $1050 LOCATORS INC 215-922-3400 PENNYPACK PARK VCT

4 bedroom corner lot! No credit check! Garage $1150 LOCATORS INC 215-922-3400 PORT RICHMOND VCT

2 story 4 bedroom house, no credit check $775 LOCATORS 215-922-3400 PORT RICHMOND VCT

2 story 4 bedroom house, no credit check $775 LOCATORS 215-922-3400 QUEEN VILLAGE

Seven rooms, 2 story, lease purchase! garage, yard, pets ok $900’s LOCATORS 215922-3400 ROXBOROUGH

7 room home, fee paid, pets ok, no credit check $950 LOCATORS 215-922-3400 SOUTH PHILADELPHIA

3+ bedroom 2 story house, lease purchase & own it! Deck $700 LOCATORS 215-9223400 SOUTH PHILADELPHIA

4 bedroom house, fee paid! Lease purchase/make it yours! $875 LOCATORS 215922-3400 SOUTH WEST PHILADELPIA

4 bedroom, no credit check!

No credit check! All utilies pd! 4 bedroom, patio $700 LOCATORS INC 215-922-3400 TEMPLE

6 bedroom large home! Yard, washer/dryer, hardwood floors, students welcome! LOCATORS 215-922-3400 UNIVERSITY CITY

4 bedroom 2 bath, No credit check! Near park, pets ok $1050 LOCATORS INC 215922-3400 UNIVERSITY CITY

4 bedroom, 2 baths, 2 story, no creid check! Great locale! Pets $1100 LOCATORS INC 215-922-3400

Condos RENT GREEN TREE RUN CONDO

Manayunk/Roxborough Area: 2 Bedrooms, 2.5 Bath, Spacious Living Room/Dining Room, eat-in Kitchen, Refrigerator, Washer, Dryer. Gas Heat included, Free parking, Indoor and Outdoor Pool, Fitness Center. $1300.00/month rent, call 215-275-4991.

Commerical/ Warehouse COMMERCIAL (STORE)

Store on the corner of 10th & Christian 1 big window on each corner of the store. 1 block away from the Italian Market. Available Now! Make a store, $1,650 heat included. Church is 1/2 block away! Busy, Busy corner! (Good for a new business ready to start!) 215-755-4856.

Roommates NEED A ROOMMATE FAST?

Looking for a room or roommate in philly fast? We can help, call us today at 215253-3017 or goto www.eroommate.com. ROOMATES.COM

Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. Find your roommate with a click of a mouse! Visit: http:/ www.Roommates.com.

Vacation/ Seasonal Rental IL. DEER HUNTING

primetimetrophyoutfitters. com out of adams county IL we still have whitetail bow hunts open. feel free to give me a call. Jason Tangerose 815-985-4572 VACATION RENTALS

OCEAN CITY, MARYLAND. Best selection of affordable rentals. Full/partial weeks. Call for FREE brochure. Open daily. Holiday Real Estate. 1-800638-2102 Online reservations www.holidayoc.com.

Real Estate Marketplace REAL ESTATE AUCTION

FORECLOSED HOME AUCTION 90+ Homes 1 Auction: 4/29, Open House: April 17, 24 & 25. REDC 1 View Full Listings: www.Auction.com RE Brkr SB065259.


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