Philadelphia City Paper, June 14th, 2012 by Philadelphia City Paper

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Publisher Nancy Stuski Editor in Chief Theresa Everline Senior Editor Patrick Rapa News Editor Samantha Melamed Web Editor/Movies Editor Josh Middleton Arts Editor/Copy Chief Emily Guendelsberger Senior Writer Isaiah Thompson Staff Writer Daniel Denvir Assistant Copy Editor Carolyn Wyman Contributors Sam Adams, A.D. Amorosi, Janet Anderson, Rodney Anonymous, Mary Armstrong, Nancy Armstrong, Meg Augustin, Justin Bauer, Shaun Brady, Bernard Brown, Chris Brown, Peter Burwasser, Anthony Campisi, Ryan Carey, Jane Cassady, Mark Cofta, Felicia Dâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Ambrosio, Jesse Delaney, Adam Erace, M.J. Fine, David Anthony Fox, Cindy Fuchs, Michael Gold, K. Ross Hoffman, Brian Howard, Deni Kasrel, Gary M. Kramer, Drew Lazor, Gair â&#x20AC;&#x153;Dev 79â&#x20AC;? Marking, Robert McCormick, Andrew Milner, Cassie Owens, Michael Pelusi, Nathaniel Popkin, Robin Rice, Courtney Sexton, Lee Stabert, Andrew Thompson, Tom Tomorrow, Char Vandermeer, John Vettese, Bruce Walsh, Julia West, Brian Wilensky Editorial Interns Madeline Bates, Michael Blancato, Jodi Bosin, Frida Garza, Katie Linton, Brittany Thomas, Nina Willbach, Andrew Wimer Associate Web Editor/Staff Photographer Neal Santos Production Director Michael Polimeno Editorial Art Director Reseca Peskin Senior Designer Evan M. Lopez Editorial Designers Brenna Adams, Matt Egger Contributing Photographers Jessica Kourkounis, Mark Stehle Contributing Illustrators Ryan Casey, Don Haring Jr., Joel Kimmel, Cameron K. Lewis, Thomas Pitilli, Matthew Smith Human Resources Ron Scully (ext. 210) Office Manager/Sales Coordinator/Financial Coordinator Tricia Bradley (ext. 232) Circulation Director Mark Burkert (ext. 239) Senior Account Managers Nick Cavanaugh (ext. 260), Sharon MacWilliams (ext. 262), Stephan Sitzai (ext. 258) Account Managers Sara Carano (ext. 228), Chris Scartelli (ext. 215), Donald Snyder (ext. 213) Marketing/Online Coordinator Jennifer Francano (ext. 252) Office Coordinator/Adult Advertising Sales Alexis Pierce (ext. 234) Sales Intern Chelsee Lebowitz Founder & Editor Emeritus Bruce Schimmel citypaper.net 123 Chestnut Street, Third Floor, Phila., PA 19106. 215-735-8444, Tip Line 215-7358444 ext. 241, Letters to the Editor editorial@citypaper.net, Listings Fax 215-8751800, Classified Ads 215-248-CITY, Advertising Fax 215-735-8535, Subscriptions 215-735-8444 ext. 235 Philadelphia City Paper is published and distributed every Thursday in Philadelphia, Montgomery, Chester, Bucks & Delaware Counties, in South Jersey and in Northern Delaware. Philadelphia City Paper is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. Additional copies may be purchased from our main office at $1 per copy. No person may, without prior written permission from Philadelphia City Paper, take more than one copy of each issue. Pennsylvania law prohibits any person from inserting printed material of any kind into any newspaper without the consent of the owner or publisher. Contents copyright ÂŠ 2012, Philadelphia City Paper. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced without written permission from the publisher. Philadelphia City Paper assumes no obligation (other than cancellation of charges for actual space occupied) for accidental errors in advertising, but will be glad to furnish a signed letter to the buying public.

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Arts & Entertainment.........................................................19 Movies.........................................................................................23 The Agenda ..............................................................................28 Food & Drink ...........................................................................35 COVER ILLUSTRATION BY THOMAS PITILLI

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naked

the thebellcurve

city

CP’s Quality-o-Life-o-Meter

[ +1 ]

ow that the Barnes museum is open, N entrepreneur H.F.“Gerry”Lenfest says his next project will be a new history museum near Independence Mall.“OK, first things first:Think anybody would mind if I deconstruct the entireValley Forge complex and move it to Fifth and Chestnut?”

[ -1 ]

The Philly Pops, currently in bankruptcy court,say their contract with their longtime music director Peter Nero is“too economically burdensome.”Also,Nero’s goatee is “woefully outdated” and he “must have hard-on for Gershwin”and should just“dig him up and bang him already.”

[ -3 ]

n Abington woman is suing the Phillie A Phanatic for throwing her into a pool at her sister’s wedding.The defense strategy — a series of exaggerated pelvic thrusts and some voodoo fingers — is expected to be highly effective in the local court.

[ -1 ]

The woman’s attorney says she suffered “severe and permanent injuries to her head, neck, back, body, arms and legs, bones, muscles, tendons, ligaments, nerves and tissues.” He continues: “And when it appeared she’d suffered all she could suffer,the Phanatic poured popcorn on her head and crucified her.”

[ +1 ]

J oe Banner steps down as the president of the Eagles after 16 years.And then, as if awoken from a trance,thousands ofWIP listeners turn off their radios and step out into the sunlight.Anger leaves their hearts so fast they can hardly remember what it felt like. Maybe they’ll take up golf, or go fishing, or take a pottery class.The future is a blank canvas.

[ -2 ]

Hacker group UGNazi attacks Wawa’s website, adding cartoon images of Hitler. The site is quickly restored thanks to some sneaky subterfuge by another group, Hoagie’s Heroes.

[ -1 ]

AttheSugaryDrinksSummitinWashington, D.C.,MayorNuttersays,“Thebiggestspender on lobbyists in Philadelphia for the first quarter this year was Big Soda.” “And rounding out the top five were Big Cup, Big Straw, Small Napkin and Sno-Caps.”

This week’s total: -6 | Last week’s total: -7

matt egger

[ hack taxes ]

crunch time After poking holes in the mayor’s property-tax plan, City Council prepares to vote for it anyway. By Isaiah Thompson

f you still don’t know what the hell to make of the Actual Value Initiative (known by the ominous, vaguely pandemic-sounding initials “AVI”), you’re not alone, but we’re not going to say “don’t worry.” AVI will likely impact more residents of Philly (even if not very much, in some cases) than any city plan in a long, long time. AVI in a nutshell: The city’s property assessments are a mess, and have been for years. Some people are paying too much in property taxes, and many others — including many wealthier residents — are paying profoundly less than they ought to be. under AVI, the city is reassessing every property in the city according to its “actual” (see?) market value. Then, the tax itself will be rejigged to make the whole endeavor almost revenue-neutral — almost, because Mayor Michael nutter has built into his proposal a means to maintain the revenues until now collected via two years of “temporary” tax hikes, plus another property-tax hike and $94 million extra for schools. Yet it’s likely that many Philadelphians haven’t heard of the city’s ambitious, far-reaching overhaul of its property-tax system, and many won’t have heard of it until after it’s gone into effect. But — and here’s where things get a little crazy — even those who know all about it, from the engaged citizen through City Council on up to the mayor, don’t know exactly how it will all go down.

That’s largely because, after at least 10 years of buck-passing when it came to fixing the city’s broken assessments, nutter is suddenly in quite the rush to implement AVI. He’s asking Council to approve the measure before the city finishes its reassessments, and before the city itself knows what the numbers are going to be. Weeks of grilling by City Council and prodding by citizen activists have opened up all sorts of questions about how the city’s new tax system is going to work: Questions like how much the city’s property is actually worth, what tax rate residents will pay (estimates quietly grew by 50 percent over the last couple of weeks), which neighborhoods will be most affected and how many people will figure out what the hell is going on in time to apply for a so-called “homestead exemption” for resident-homeowners. This week, the Daily News commended Council for doing the “heavy lifting” in raising these and many, many other questions about the administration’s plan. Here’s the catch: Having raised all those questions, Council doesn’t appear willing to wait for the answers. On Thursday (the day this issue gets published), the legislative body will likely pass AVI, more or less as nutter wants it, giant gaping unanswereds and all. The reason for this is a complicated convergence of political factors. For one thing, there seems to be a consensus within Council that AVI is, in fact, a much fairer system. While the rush to implement it might be distasteful to many, all the confusion — and the public’s lack of understanding — also gives Council a certain amount of political cover: If Council members wait a year, they’ll

No one knows how it’ll go down.

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Crunch Time <<< continued from previous page

undoubtedly spend that year facing new opposition to the changes. What’s more, there are just enough Council members with districts that stand to benefit from the shifting burden of property taxes to make the change politically feasible. Add to that the mayor’s proposal to fold extra money for the schools into AVI — which several Council members believe will allow Council increased leverage over how the School District spends that money — and you’ve got, it sure looks like, the nine votes needed to get AVI approved. Increasingly, it appears as if the remaining questions on AVI won’t be answered until well after it’s a done deal. So, for posterity if nothing else, here are a few of them. How much is the city worth? In a presentation to the Pennsylvania Intergovernmental Cooperation Authority some weeks ago, the nutter administration estimated the city’s total property value will have increased by a factor of three or four, to $110 billion or more. But in subsequent Council hearings, that number began to drop — eventually to a possible $80 billion. The lower that number goes, the more everyone has to chip in to make the city’s revenue target. Another thorny issue: How will the so-called “homestead exemption” play out? The administration had suggested resident-homeowners receive relief equal to the first $15,000 of their property value. Council doubled that number, which means a greater burden will fall on everyone else. (non-exempt landlords could pass along their higher taxes to their renters, 75 percent of whom are low income.) Meanwhile, Councilman James Kenney, along with Council leadership, has pushed a “gentrification” relief measure that exempts 10-year homeowners whose property values have more than tripled from paying taxes on any assessment above that for 10 years. The measure will be a game-changer for residents of rapidly gentrifying

neighborhoods. But because state law doesn’t allow the city to apply a “means test” to weed out the wealthy, it will also exempt at least some affluent property owners. What’s more, there may be many residents deserving of relief whose properties have not quite tripled in value, or who’ve owned their houses not quite 10 years. Wrapped up in the above three questions is another, more fundamental one: What will the tax be? Because the administration doesn’t actually have the numbers yet, the bill before Council would allow the tax rate to be determined algebraically, in order to meet the city’s target revenue. But as the total assessment value goes down, and as exemptions go up, the estimated tax itself has gone up, too, from an estimated 1.2 percent to an estimated 1.8 percent, a 50 percent increase in just a few weeks. Finally, there’s the unanswered question of what, exactly, nutter has been up to with the numbers — especially that $94 million for the schools. Where did it come from? The administration has claimed all along that it represents extra value that’d be “captured” as property values rose. But there are contradictions, as Councilman Bill Green and Council President Darrell Clarke revealed when they asked why that number remained the same even as the administration lowered its estimates of the city’s property value. Green has asserted that the figure represents merely the flip-side of a back-door tax hike built into the bill. Because the city splits its realestate proceeds roughly 40-60 with the School District, the $94 million, according to this theory, correlates to the district’s 60 percent share of a revenue increase that gives the city about $70 million. These and other questions clearly rankled members of Council — but not enough, it seems as of press time, to stop the AVI train from leaving the station. The next big question is what that will mean — for us, and for Philly politicians — just down the track. (isaiah.thompson@citypaper.net)

citybeat By Samantha Melamed

CritiCal Care ➤ We’re in the midst of a funding crisis: Anyone

Madeline Bates

Send feedback to samantha@citypaper.net

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Bridesburg, 2012

who’s picked up a newspaper in the last few months — since Gov. Tom Corbett outlined his starvationlevel budget proposal — knows that. A more complex, lesser-known story: How new policies from the state Department of Public Welfare (DPW) threaten Philly’s most vulnerable populations, like the elderly poor and those with intellectual disabilities. First, there’s a new DPW policy, to take effect July 1, eliminating nurse supervision for elderly people who live at home through the state Aging Waiver program. Holly Lange of the Philadelphia Corporation for the Aging says without that supervision, mistakes and gaps in care are inevitable. Take Daisy Mitchell, 92. She’s suffered three strokes and numerous injuries. For months, while she waited to have a stair lift installed, she was essentially trapped in her bedroom, says Bobbi Jones, Mitchell’s daughter and caretaker. Doctor visits required an ambulance, making in-home nursing care critical. “I really depend on the nurses,” says Jones. “They know the history, they’re able to observe things.” In this case, the same number of elderly will be served at a lower standard of care. For intellectualdisabilities service providers — already facing a 15,000-person waiting list statewide — new DPW-set fees for services, also to begin July 1, could mean even fewer people served. The problem is, fixed rates don’t acknowledge varying needs. “There seem to be wide swings in whether or not the providers’ actual costs … are covered,” says Gabrielle Sedor of Pennsylvania Advocacy and Resources for Autism and Intellectual Disabilities. Kathy Brown McHale of Special People in Northeast (SPIN) says SPIN is struggling to make sense of rates, like day-service rates cut by up to 40 percent. “There’s winners and losers, and there’s no look at quality,” she says. “You could be a lousy program, and you might have just gotten a windfall, while some of the best programs could have gotten devastated. And those things are happening.” There’s a common thread among these cuts, providers say:They’re penny wise but pound foolish. Putting seniors into nursing homes is three times more expensive than home care, notes Lange. And driving people with intellectual disabilities out of community-based care and into institutions is twice as expensive, says Maureen Cronin of The Arc of Pennsylvania, an advocacy group. She says, “The number of people admitted this year has grown dramatically from previous years, so it’s already a sign that providers are less able to provide services with the funding policies of the department.”

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[ is for posterity if nothing else ]

back to the future Eastwick residents say development on land left vacant for 60 years — part of a faded urban-renewal scheme — is the resurrection of an old injustice. By Samantha Melamed

loria Thomas is still haunted by the first time developers came to Eastwick, back in the 1950s. Her family was among the 10,000 residents of this landscape of lowlands, swamp, farming country and neighborhoods where black and white residents lived and let live — all taken by eminent domain over passionate community opposition, and razed to make way for the largest urban-renewal scheme in the country. Now, says Thomas, a $102 million plan by Korman Residential to take 35 acres of that condemned land and rezone it to accommodate 722 apartments — whether the community likes it or not — is giving her flashbacks to the bad old days. “This is like something back in the ’50s, the same thing all over again. My mother, my grandmother, they all went through this same thing years ago. My grandmother was so upset about it, she up and died. Older people were killing themselves,” Thomas says. “Now I’m going through the same thing.” The land in question is part of 128 acres wedged between the John Heinz National Wildlife Refuge, 84th Street and Mario Lanza Boulevard. As part of a deal dating back to 1961, Korman has the option to purchase and develop the land, owned by the Philadelphia Redevelopment Authority (PRA). That option has been extended over the years through various maneuvers; the PRA tried to litigate its way out of the deal in 2005 and failed, according to Amy Laura Cahn, a Public Interest Law Center of Philadelphia lawyer who’s assisting the Eastwick residents. “Korman’s purchase option ends in 2015,” says Cahn, “and they’re suddenly in a tremendous rush to develop it.” Eighth District Councilman Kenyatta Johnson introduced a bill to rezone the land, from single-family to multi-family development, on May 17; on May 24, he introduced a second bill to allow for the remaining 79 acres in the tract to be sold to the airport for its planned expansion. The two bills were linked, it seemed, part of a behind-thescenes deal that worked for everyone, except the nearby residents. Neighbors, who showed up en masse at a City Council hearing Tuesday, say they’ve been cut out of the rezoning process, which was undertaken via ordinance rather than through the city’s Zoning Board of Adjustments. Gary Stolz, manager of the Heinz refuge, worries the loss of the 128-acre buffer could damage the Delaware River’s last remaining stretch of freshwater tidal marsh and threaten the several endangered species that call Heinz home. Residents are worried about traffic, impacts on wildlife, crime and alreadyinsufficient sewers and infrastructure (sinkholes are common). And everyone is worried about flooding, in a region of the city where serious floods are an annual occurrence. “When we have a good, hard rain, it comes right into my dining room,” says Carolyn Moseley, who lives near the site on Lyons Place. She says you don’t have to be a hydrologist to know that paving the acreage behind her house to put in 51 apartment structures and 1,034 parking spots will make the drainage problem even worse. Of course, the community hasn’t seen any reports from a hydrologist — or environmental-impact studies, traffic studies or infrastructure studies. “Nobody reached out to Heinz, nobody reached out to the community,” says Cahn. “All of the community participation that’s happening now was instigated by community leaders.” Leonard Stewart, 67, was the first Eastwick resident to notice the quiet resurrection of the ghost of urban renewal. He spotted surveyors near his house on the 8500 block of Lyons Place and began asking questions. Terrance Johnson, who lives nearby (and believed his home backed onto the Heinz refuge, not a potential apartment site), began making phone calls. That’s when he learned that Korman

SAMANTHA MELAMED

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[ the naked city ]

[ development ]

Gary Stolz (center) and Terrance Johnson (right) address Eastwick residents on Monday.

was involved. The name is something of a dirty word in the area. Resident Joanne Graham told Council Tuesday about recurrent flooding in her Korman-built Eastwick home. Residents and the Heinz refuge hastily organized, creating the Eastwick Friends and Neighbors Coalition. Cahn says their immediate goal is to delay the rezoning until Council reconvenes in September, so that more study and community input may be possible. “The importance of having community participation in a place, particularly where there’s 50 years of history of cutting people out of the process — it’s really the bottom line,” she says. Guian McKee, an associate professor at the University of Virginia who has researched the Eastwick redevelopment, says that back in the 1950s, “it was a very top-down kind of planning process.” Eastwick was redeveloped partly as a place to house the black residents displaced by renewal efforts in North Philly. “We’re still seeing the consequences today of decisions that were made 50 or 60 years ago,” says McKee. “This is still the urban-renewal story playing out.” He figures about two-thirds of the original Eastwick plan was enacted. Korman received rights to about 500 acres, including the land now in question. City officials — Council, the mayor, the PRA — “have their own political interests in seeing these projects succeed,” he says, “But you have to stand back and question whether these deals are in the public interest.” Still, Johnson has expressed enthusiasm for the project, and interest in brokering a community-benefit agreement. His spokesman, Zack Burgess, says, “The councilman … understands the issues of his constituents who have issues with Korman. But based on what he’s seen thus far, he hopes that it can be good for both sides.” On Tuesday, Korman attorney Peter Kelsen pledged the project could “go a tremendous way” toward alleviating flooding, and committed to working with the community. The city Commerce Department touted the jobs to be had in construction, the need for middle-income apartments. And Johnson asked the Rules Committee for a favorable vote. But as of press time, the committee hadn’t moved on the bill. Gloria Thomas believes the proposal is just more of the same. In the 1950s, “Korman put the lie out, that this was all swampland and farmland. We had a country suburban lifestyle, and they dismantled everything. It’s really something to go back to all this again.” (samantha@citypaper.net)

“This is like something in the ’50s.”

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B Y E M I LY G U E N D E L S B E R G E R

If you’re searching for an answer, books are pretty trustworthy, but less likely to answer your question. The Internet makes answers easy to find, but they’re of dubious quality. Actual human interaction — asking someone who knows — is a happy medium from the oldest of schools, but who has time for human interaction? The Free Library is making time this Wednesday, June 20, with Living Library. They’ve recruited dozens of experts on various topics who will be making themselves available for 15-minute “checkout” slots during the free evening. We spoke to some of the available “living books,” including a homicide detective, a nontheist activist, a master homebrewer, a musician and teacher, a photographer and a scientist who studies smell and taste. Each was so much more interesting than fits in this space, but here are a few excerpts, along with a book recommendation for someone who wants to know what each person’s job is really like. Or you could just go check them out yourself. What do you do, NANCY RIGBERG? I own Home Sweet Homebrew and I teach people to make beer. Where does that skunky taste come from? You know when you go to a bottle shop and you see those big cases with the fluorescent lighting and the clear glass? (The bottle shops are going to hate me for this.) When you’re buying takeout beer from a case, don’t ever take the front six-pack. Take the ones that aren’t directly exposed to the light, because light is the enemy — light and heat. Beer, while sturdy, is not indestructible. Is it gauche to bring a nice bottle of beer to an expensive BYO? There are a lot of food pairings that don’t match up with wine at all where beer marries beautifully! Salads, anything with acidity, asparagus, chocolate — beer goes better with chocolate than red wine does.

What do you do, MARGARET DOWNEY? I’m a social activist representing the nontheist community [atheists, agnostics and more] and the founder of the Freethought Society. You had a near-death experience that didn’t affect your lack of belief in a higher power? Yes — I was deprived of oxygen after a surgical procedure. I floated above the bed and saw the nurse’s station and looked back and I was there, choking. I started walking towards a bright light, and at the end NEAL SANTOS

BREWED AWAKENING: Nancy Rigberg of Home Sweet Homebrew is one of the many expert “living books;” she can tell you, among other things, why you should never buy the first six-pack in the case.

Read: The God Delusion by Richard Dawkins I’d also recommend One Woman’s Fight by Vashti McCollum, who fought to get the reading of the Bible stopped in schools all the way to the Supreme Court. The book was written in the 1940s, but it’s still compelling and wonderful. What do you do, TIM SCALLY? I’m a detective in the Philadelphia Police Department assigned to the homicide unit. Is the “CSI effect” real? We deal with it all the time with juries. All the time. They want to see it projected on a big screen, they want fingerprints, they want DNA, they want the smoking gun — most of the time, we don’t have that.We have a lot of witness testimony,and we don’t get our witnesses out of central casting. Does any show get some details right? The First 48 is the closest to what we do. But they have their own desk, their own car — that’s a reality show, but we’re a bigger department, we don’t have the same things. Another is The Wire, when two [detectives] get a car key and go out >>> continued on page 12

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Read: Brewing Up a Business: Adventures in Entrepreneurship from the Founder of Dogfish Head Craft Brewery by Sam Calagione We remember Sam when he was just a little Dogfish, not the big Dogfish he is now! [Laughs.] Otherwise, Where the Wild Things Are! It’s kind of like herding cats, herding brewers.

of the tunnel was my dear departed Uncle Floyd. He died when I was 16; he had been my mentor through my teenage years and taught me to ask a lot of questions about the world. [He was also an atheist.] As I was walking toward him, I was revived. Rather than thinking of it as supernatural, I started resear ching and it boiled down to this: We are human animals that all experience the same thing when we are deprived of oxygen. That sense of floating is a symptom of what’s happening to your brain. When you see someone you’ve missed, who has died … your brain has a memory, and of course you want to see that person again. I never had any mystical attachment to it; I knew science could — and did — explain it.

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“Can babies taste salt?” and other burning questions answered by the “books” of the Living Library.

feature

CheckYou out

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to the car lot, and the carâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not there. And that is so true. Why do you think some people talk to you instead of a lawyer after youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve read them their rights? [Deadpan.] I think itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s my bubbly personality. No, I think itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s conscience. Read: None I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t think there is a book. I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t think anybody could write this stuff. What do you do, SARAH STOLFA? Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m the executive director of the Philadelphia Photo Arts Center. You won a New York Times contest with a series of portraits of customers you had bartending at McGlincheyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s. Whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the best way to ask if you can take someoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s picture? Nicely! [Laughs.] Just be direct, and respect when somebody says no. Did many people say no? Oh, yeah. [Laughs.] There was one woman I really wanted to photograph â&#x20AC;&#x201D; I mostly worked and photographed at nights, but Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d sometimes go in during the day, and thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a different cast of characters during the day at McGlincheyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s. There was one woman I wanted to photograph, but she said no, that her husband would know where she went for lunch. Read: The Americans by Robert Frank Between 1954 and 1956, Robert Frank drove around on a Guggenheim fellowship and photographed the country: the people, the landscape, icons of the culture. We were coming off an Ansel Adams understand-

ing of what black-and-white photography was; these pictures were dark and gritty, showing banal moments of life and major cultural tensions. At the time, it was a major shift; it challenged not just how pictures looked, but what we took pictures of. What do you do, BEVERLY COWART? I study the chemical senses of humans at the Monell Center. Can babies taste everything adults can? Babies can taste sweet, sour and bitter at birth; they have an innate rejection of bitter and sour and preference for sweetness. Newborns donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t appear to respond to salt, though; if you drop some in their mouths, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no reaction. After about three months, they start to exhibit a preference for salt. Do you know why yet? We donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t, actually. The field has made tremendous progress in the past 10 or 12 years in understanding sweet and bitter, but the salt receptor has not been specifically identified. Read: What the Nose Knows: The Science of Scent in Everyday Life by Avery Gilbert What do you do, STANFORD THOMPSON? Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m the CEO of Play On, Philly!, which is an after-school music program inspired by El Sistema [the highly respected music-education program for Venezuelan children of all economic classes]. We currently engage 110 kids in West Philadelphia for three hours of music instruction after

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school five days a week, 40 weeks a year. How do you talk kids into choosing less-popular instruments? More kids want to play violin and trumpet; they arenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t as interested in things like French horn and viola. But itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not that hard. Most of the time, we just hold up a French horn and say how handsome and noble it looks:â&#x20AC;&#x153;We really need responsible people on an instrument like that.â&#x20AC;? Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s kind of reverse psychology. Read: Evenings With the Orchestra by Hector Berlioz Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hilarious. Berlioz has all these stories of what would really go on in the pit of an opera orchestra. They would come in without any pants on, because everyone could only see them from the chest up; or they would be taking shots while counting rests, or playing poker. I wish more people realized classical musicians are pretty normal people. Wed., June 20, 7-8:30 p.m., free, Free Library, Central Branch, 1901 Vine St., Room 108, 215-686-5415, freelibrary.org/livinglibrary.

From “Change” to politics as usual, ’tis (almost) the season to be either inspired or constantly annoyed. A new Library of Congress publication put out by Philly’s Quirk Books provides evidence from the 1800s to Obama of how would-be presidents have to balance recalling the good old days with shooting for progress. But Presidential Campaign Posters (March 20), a large-format book with 100 pages meant to be pulled out and hung up, focuses on graphic design rather than proposed policy. The selections come from the Library of Congress archives, each with analysis of the images and campaigns from library staff, including Library of Congress publishing director W. Ralph Eubanks. So how does a candidate win, at least at the poster game? Our national colors, the flag, bald eagles, Lady Liberty: This, in the world of visuals, is America, and it’s not news that candidates are posed next these images as frequently as possible. In one poster, the iconic “I Want You” Uncle Sam (who originally pointed from a 1917 WWI Army

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recruitment poster) is juxtaposed with a painting of F.D.R. in a similar style, saying He Wants “You, F.D.R.” to “Stay and Finish the Job!” In earlier years, when people recognized the faces of the Founding Fathers beyond the ones on currency, it was common to encircle a candidate’s image with small portraits of presidents past. The “circle of presidents” tactic paid off for Rutherford B. Hayes (maybe it was the extra eagle thrown onto his poster). But it can backfire: Lewis Cass, a failed contender, tried this approach, but according to Eubanks,“it ended up being parodied — made a mockery of.” A poster for Cass’ opponent Zachary Taylor helped spread the jeers by including a multi-verse song (to the tune of “Yankee Doodle Dandy”) in small type at the bottom: “So gassy Cass, why must you pass / You shifting, sly pretender … .” Invoking the past is important, says Eubanks, but so is the present cultural mood. “Street art, pop culture — these things infuse the campaign, whether the campaign wants to admit it or not.” Electioneering of the past half-century is rich with posters trying to piggyback on the zeitgeist; in the ’60s, psychedelic images aren’t just employed in support of Eugene McCarthy and the Kennedys — in one bizarre example, Nixon is drawn up in a groovy color scheme straight out of Jefferson Airplane. But nothing says “presidential poster” like a really, really big head. According to Eubanks, the big head is a good bet in most situations. Elements of a successful campaign poster, he says, often include “an idealized image of the candidate, a good slogan that’s short and easy to remember and something that’s bold, graphically.” Obama obviously had this idea down flat in 2008, but William Howard Taft was on it a whole century earlier. One poster from Taft’s 1908 campaign that feels particularly modern in its minimalism is by illustrator

feature

A graphic history shows that, despite “Change,” presidential campaign posters stay the same.

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BIGHEADS, BLUES AND REDS

John de Yongh (shown, above). The space is dominated by Taft’s smiling, mustachioed, multi-chinned, disembodied head, with the single word “BILL” written under it. Take that, Shepard Fairey. (editorial@citypaper.net)

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Summerreading New book reviews, from sci-fi to gay rights. FICTION

BILLY LYNN’S LONG HALFTIME WALK By Ben Fountain One of the bitterest lessons in Drift,Rachel Maddow’s recent book on America’s out-of-control military culture, is that we’ve become a country that can tune out its wars. Where Vietnam was made inescapable by the draft and the protests, the War on Terror feels more like an elective, a channel we’ve learned to turn off. It’s this emotional and intellectual disconnect that drives Ben Fountain’s wickedly affecting first novel, Billy Lynn’s Long Halftime Walk (May 1, 320 pp., Ecco). It’s Thanksgiving Day 2004. “Mission Accomplished” is a year-old national joke. The post-9/11 flag-waving has wavered. Americans need something to believe in, lest we lose interest in the wars altogether (which we eventually will). Cue the young, drunk boys of Bravo Company, Marines deployed on a U.S.-spanning, morale-boosting public-relations campaign after an embedded Fox News camera catches them behaving heroically during a firefight in Iraq. Nineteen-year-old Billy Lynn and the rest of the surviving Bravos have one last whistle stop before they’re due back in Baghdad: a redonkulous walk-on during the halftime show at a Cowboys-Bears game, sandwiched between Destiny’s Child and fireworks. It’s absurd. It’s overthe-top. It’s totally the sort of PR stunt you could imagine the Bush administration dreaming up. Billy Lynnhas courted some Catch-22comparisons, and they’re well-earned. Fountain is a whiz at lining up plausible inanities and gut-twisting truths for the Bravos to suffer through: The agent who swears he’s super close to selling their story to Hollywood (one catch — Hilary Swank has to play Billy). The PTSD-triggering fireworks. The countless run-ins with everyday citizens, whose dull support-the-troops patriotism manifests as slurred buzzwords on mostly blank pages:“double y’im dees,”“nina leven,”“terrRist,” etc. Apparently, both sides have learned to tune each other out. —Patrick Rapa HISTORICAL FICTION

BRING UP THE BODIES By Hilary Mantel Set in the court of King Henry VIII during his brief

marriage to Anne Boleyn, Bring up the Bodies (May 8, 432 pp., Henry Holt) maps the painstaking efforts of Thomas Cromwell, the king’s consigliore, to dissolve the royal marriage before the queen can strike him down. The story’s end is well known by anyone with even a passing knowledge of English history, so it’s to the novel’s credit that the plot manages to retain a fierce tension. This is the second novel in Hilary Mantel’s planned trilogy, and it’s best enjoyed after reading the first, Wolf Hall, which established Cromwell’s humble upbringing and rise to the halls of power (much to the displeasure of the noble families). In this context, Bodies is even better than its predecessor — with its characters already established, Mantel is free to devote herself to the action. Bodies is a terrifying portrait of absolute monarchy, a form of government so removed from modern Americans that we tend to think of it through a fantastical lens, if we think of it at all. But Henry is terrifying: absolutely powerful, emotionally fragile, murderous in his anger and desperate for a male heir. The haughty noble families jockeying for influence at court are just as bad, though, unlike Henry, they have to keep their wrath under wraps, operating via bank shots like aiming one of the king’s fickle rages at an enemy. In one masterful scene in which Henry is struck unconscious during a joust, the nobles immediately begin eyeing each other over the body, more than ready to plunge the country into civil war if he doesn’t wake up. Cromwell stands apart, a banker among aristocrats, a sign of things to come. But the times didn’t change quickly enough to save him; his fall from grace and execution will provide Mantel with plenty of material for the trilogy’s final novel, The Mirror and the Light. —Jake Blumgart FICTION

OFFICE GIRL By Joe Meno I got a bad feeling immediately upon being introduced to Jack, the second character we meet at any length in Joe Meno’s Office Girl (July 3, 224 pp., Akashic) — Odile, the titular girl, being the first. Meno sets Jack atop a bicycle in the middle of a morning commute, and says, “There is nothing the least bit remarkable about him; everything,

including his facial features, is completely, hopelessly average.” Things continue like this, with Meno being imprecise in looping sentences, and Jack and Odile getting and losing dead-end jobs, complaining about roommates, collecting material for art projects that never quite seem to get under way and riding around Chicago on bicycles. Fortunately, there’s more hidden underneath the stylistic flatness and style-section hipsterdom. Meno, who wrote so well about adolescence in books like Hairstyles of the Damned, has more in mind than making another one for the stack of novels by, for and/or about listless, directionless, vaguely creative urban people in their twenties, stuck in some nexus between Etsy and Tao Lin. Once Meno brings his characters together and gives them things to do other than mope, their stories take on color and shape. Office Girl is a relatively simple love story: You know most of the beats and understand from the beginning how the story needs to end; the pleasure comes from the way Meno hits those beats, how he manages his characters and moments. And some of those moments are really excellent: Jack and Odile’s drift toward a first kiss, for instance, or their lovers’ conspiracy, mirrored in Cody Hudson’s naive drawings. And the heavier ideas that Meno stuffs into the corners around his self-consciously slight characters — like an ongoing struggle with sound and music that’s part of the last-act climax — give the book more weight than the mumble-y stuff it looks like at the start. —Justin Bauer YA/FANTASY

RAILSEA By China Miéville Melville. Miéville. Melville. Miéville. Given China Miéville’s love of wordplay, it’s natural to wonder whether his Railsea (May 15, 448 pp., Del Rey) came about because the feel of the two words juxtaposed got stuck in his head. It initially seems like Railsea will be a fairly straight take on Moby-Dick.By “straight,” though, I mean only that the bones of Melville’s setup — a newcomer, a captain, an obsession, a dangerous leviathan — remain intact. Since this is a China Miéville book, it’s all been run through the algorithm of his frighteningly prolific imagination. Details >>> continued on page 16

■ CITYPAPER.NET E-Reading rainbow: More reviews online and in print the whole year round; plus, we help you keep up with which author’s in town to read what and where every week in our Bookish column at citypaper.net/criticalmass.

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come out the other end recognizable, but rotated 90 degrees or so. This one-for-one substitution is visually evident from the first page, with “&” replacing “and” (an affectation that is eventually explained, but especially at the beginning made me long for an audiobook). The obsessed captain has a prosthetic arm; she and her crew hunt by train on ocean-sized deserts crisscrossed with nonsensically dense train tracks. Just beneath the “railsea” lurks a nasty underworld of big-to-huge “moldywarpes,” predatory schools of chipmunks, earthworms, and other outsized burrowers. No seafaring detail is too small to be put through the algorithm: Even the traditional figureheads are changed from beautiful women to men with glasses. Along with his love-’em-or-hate-’em verbal acrobatics, Miéville’s big strength is his ability to create detailed worlds that feel astonishingly unfamiliar even in the seen-everything sci-fi and fantasy genres. Here, he transposes Ahab’s iconic quest to a future past its prime and still backsliding; the oceans were replaced long ago with a dense, continental-scale tangle of railroad tracks, a mysterious swap that happened so long ago nobody remembers words like “whale” or “ocean,” much less why it happened. Despite its adult-sized length and vocab words, this is a YA book; wisely, then, the wink-wink-nudgenudge Dick jokes (for example, the white mole’s name, Mocker-Jack, is derived from Mocha Dick, the real white whale that inspired Melville) fall off pretty early on, as does the adherence to Melville’s framework. Protagonist Sham, a young orphan signed on as a doctor’s apprentice on the moleship, starts out as our Ishmael, learning the ropes of a new ship for our benefit. But once the story swerves off, it briefly runs parallel to other seafaring adventures — The Odyssey, Treasure Island, Kidnapped! — en route to a familiar destination: Boy goes on adventure, becomes man. —Emily Guendelsberger FICTION

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CAPITAL By John Lanchester It’s helpful that John Lanchester is so good with introductions, like a first-class real estate agent or a gladhanding Rotarian, because Capital (June 11, 528 pp., Norton) crams a queen-sized cast into the life of London’s Pepys Road as it tracks the effects of the credit crunch over 13 months in 2007 and 2008. There’s Travis the real estate agent, who “was an avid fan of TV property programmes and felt at ease with the culture of wandering around other people’s houses and passing judgement on them.”And there’s judge Peter McAllister, thickening around the middle, who “looked like a privileged man passing into early middle age with his early assumptions

and prejudices entirely intact. That impression,” Lanchester helpfully adds, “was accurate: That was exactly who Peter McAllister was.” Neither Travis nor McAllister are important characters –- their parts run to not much more than a page each in a hefty 528 pages, meant to show a full cross-section of modern London. But this is Lanchester’s MO with all of his characters, minor or not: telescoping from the well-observed detail to a just-so explanation of what sort of person that makes him or her. Because this stimulus-response idea of character is so mechanical, it doesn’t leave much room for surprise — not from banker Roger Yount, at the center of the story, nor for his immigrant Hungarian nanny Matya, closer to the edges. Lanchester’s sharp assessments seem actually to belong less to fiction than to long-form journalism. And this makes sense, as his last book, I.O.U., came out three years ago amidst a glut of books explaining the credit crisis. By most accounts I.O.U. was excellent, but it’s easy to see why Lanchester wants to revisit the same subject as fiction — he gets to weave in, for better or worse, hot-button subplots like terrorism, immigration and Banksy-style art. More than that, though, fiction gives him the freedom not only to pass judgment, but to deliver sentences. —Justin Bauer SCI-FI

THE AGE OF MIRACLES By Karen Thompson Walker Apocalyptic stories tend to feature a sudden calamity followed by heroic measures. Karen Thompson Walker’s remarkable first novel, The Age of Miracles (June 26, 288 pp., Random House), is quite the opposite. Eleven-year-old Julia is as surprised and helpless as everyone else as the Earth’s rotation gradually and mysteriously slows, disrupting her life of soccer games, piano lessons and training bras. “This was middle school,” she narrates; “the age of miracles.” “The slowing” brings huge world changes on top of Julia’s own smaller ones, but mysterious mass bird deaths and her best friend’s sudden coldness are equally devastating.We take the Earth’s rotation, the root of our sense of time, for granted; in “the slowing,” days become 30, 40 and then 70 hours long. Plants wither under the assault of unrelenting days and freezing nights. Society tries to maintain 24-hour “clock time” despite night and day falling ever more out of sync, while rebels create “real time” enclaves, trying to live sunrise to sunset. Miracles could be called genre fiction, but like more and more mainstream novels set in speculative and strange worlds, it focuses on the people, not the setting. Like the late Ray Bradbury, Walker reveals the global situation through real, ordinary charac-

ters. Julia’s small circle is vividly drawn: parents who retreat into hoarding and adultery, neighbors who chase religious comfort, friends who continue dating rituals as their world slowly crumbles. Julia is Walker’s greatest achievement, a believable, compelling girl living a normal life twisted by abnormal horrors. Through her, we learn how people might cope with a world ending — maybe not with a bang, but certainly with more than a whimper. —Mark Cofta NONFICTION

VICTORY: THE TRIUMPHANT GAY REVOLUTION By Linda Hirshman Talk about timely: Supreme Court lawyer and occasional morning-news-show talking head Linda Hirshman’s Victory: The Triumphant Gay Revolution (June 5, 464 pp., Harper) hits shelves a month after the leader of the Free World proclaimed his support for gay marriage. His announcement inspired a barrage of game-changing supporters — from unlikely celeb endorsements to, perhaps most significant of all, the NAACP — and for the first time we’ve seen poll numbers cross the 50 percent mark in favor of same-sex matrimony. But, even with all that, has Hirshman jumped the gun by calling her book Victory? Hirschman puts together a detailed history of the fight for gay rights, something she refers to as “the third great modern social-justice movement,” alongside those of African-Americans and women. Her painstakingly researched, thank-God-it’s-conversational story begins at the turn of the 20th century, when the “pansy craze” sashayed through the nation’s metropolises. At the time, homosexuals were content keeping their pastimes (mostly cruising in parks and carousing in speakeasy-type drag bars) secret, not yet understanding the need to rally a here-and-queer community presence. That all changed during World War II, however, when limp-wristed soldiers were denied the right to serve and, in some cases, sent home without the benefits promised to vets. In 1948, led by gay Communist (and occasional cross-dresser) Henry Hay, the revolution was born; Hirshman recounts the whole shebang through interviews with hundreds of colorful characters involved with the struggle. She covers it all, from crucial early moments like Stonewall and the all-too-short reign of Harvey Milk to the recent repeal of “don’t ask, don’t tell” and the passing of marriage-equality legislation in New York. With so much on the horizon, she could have chosen a more apt title, sure, but Victoryis one of the most important (and readable) gay-history texts around. We’ll just have to make sure she makes a few amendments along the way. —Josh Middleton

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icepack By A.D. Amorosi

PANIC ON: “I reread Steppenwolf several times, each in a radically different state of mind. Each time it took on a new tone,” says Edward Everett (center). JOHN RYAN

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TRAGIC CARPET RIDE Philly band Panic Years takes cues and comfort from an unlikely source. By A.D. Amorosi

“There was an existential nihilism in there.”

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Unidos da Filadelfia, Ruba Hall, 414 Green St., 215-627-9831, panicyearsband.com.

ou know what you never hear about? A band inspired by the existential vision of 20th-century German-born poet and novelist Hermann Hesse. A lead singer and songwriter so enthralled by Steppenwolf, Siddhartha and The Glass Bead Game that he asked his bandmates to read up and let the stringent tales of mortality inform their art-rocking melodies. “The themes presented in Steppenwolf — the duality of man and beast, anomie, death, suffering and most of all self-actualization and transcendence — all were hitting close to home at the right time,” says Edward Everett of Panic Years. The local quartet’s debut full-length, The Month’s Mind, is rife with Hesse references. But Everett’s melancholy tenor, somewhere between a squawk and a coo, Amy Miller’s guitar, Adam Smith’s bass, Jason Gooch’s drums and the collective noodling of a battery of hired-gun synths, strings and French horns — that chamber-pop noise — never wilts under the weight of its ideas. “We didn’t go into the writing process with the mindset that everything had to stay within a theme,” says Miller, who, like Everett, came to Philly from Virginia. “Yet Edward ended up giving me a copy of Steppenwolf and, after reading it, his themes and concepts became clearer. Individual lyrics started to make sense and

take on a different meaning than they had before.” After what he calls a “series of personal tragedies,” Everett looked for solace in all kinds of books: philosophy, psychology, religion, self-help. But he found solutions, finally, in Steppenwolf, different answers at different times. “I reread Steppenwolf several times, each in a radically different state of mind. Each time it took on a new tone.” The first read was while Everett was in what he deems a negative space, and the songs he wrote for Panic Years — “Control the Action,” “Bad Faith” — reflected that everything-means-nothing feeling. “I’m sure there was an existential nihilism in there that must have made me seem like an overdramatic hipster,” says Everett. After he came to better terms with the loss of loved ones and what to make of his own inevitable death, Everett found cheerful complements to those new feelings in “The Same Haunt” and “The Month’s Mind.” In particular, that latter track — titled for a celebratory service held one month after a loved one passes with the “minding days” prior to that focusing on fond memories of the deceased — gave him pause and allowed him to consider the possibilities. “I tried to imagine each track as a minding day, each song with its own story to tell, but, when presented together, having a greater theme.” (a_amorosi@citypaper.net)

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³ WITH NORTH BROAD Street well on its way to reformation (all we need is that Blatstein casino, right?) it’s time to truly-really-truly consider South Broad. The Blackglama fur place is graffitied up and the Frank Sinatra mural is covered up. Help has got to be on the way. The Broad Street Diner, the Boot & Saddle redux and Adam Wallacavage’s octopus-chandeliered brownstone can’t be the end of the remake/remodel, either. That’s why it’s exciting that the Dolphin — very possibly the oldest amateur strip joint in Philly; I’m thinking Ben Franklin dropped a couple of folded-up bills there — is looking to spruce up. But they need us. “We’re hoping to raise a few dollars to help with some much-needed cosmetic repairs,” says booking guy Bill Bruzek. “The Dolphin never charges a cover. For years people have been getting quality entertainment for free.” That’s why the Dolphin is holding GO-GO-Stock with dancers galore and handfuls of punk and metal bands across three days (June 22 to 24). A pass for the weekend costs $25. Philly Roller Girls, Eddie’s Tattoos and Air Records are on board. Acts include Flesh Engine, Thee Nosebleeds and 18 others. Give till it hurts, I tell you. ³ Does this strike you as ass-kissy? The just-opened Hop Sing Laundromat posted its $12 drink menu on its website and one item, “Bells of Brotherly Love,” sticks out for its pucker-power. The Chinaco Tequila Blanco-based beverage is (their description) for “an individual who has ruled Philadelphia with an iron pen/keyboard for over 14 years. Not much is known about this handsome gentleman except he is known to bring tears to grown men and women in the dining world.”Could be Inky restaurant critic Craig LaBan,right? It’s flattering to have a cocktail named for you. I’m certain HSL would call my concoction “The Flaming Asshole.” ³ Fun with possible local filming schedules for summer: Could Colin Farrell and Will Smith both return to Philly to lens part of the whimsical Winter’s Tale, again subbing Philly for the script’s NYC setting? Is Martin Scorsese looking to use Philly (remember Age of Innocence at the Academy of Music?) to save $ on The Wolf of Wall Street after Leo DiCaprio wraps Django Unchained? Did director Sean Penn’s people call about local locations for the Bob De Niro/Kristen Wiig flickThe Comedian? “So many rumors,” laughs Greater Philadelphia Film Office goddess Sharon Pinkenson.“We’ll have to wait and see what happens.” ³ After closing his Indian-pizza joint Tiffin Etc. (next to Tiffin on West Girard) weeks ago, Munish “Tashan” Narula has had a change of heart. He just reopened Etc. after locals griped they wanted their kati rolls. They’re addictive. ³ More dispatches from the copper keyboard at citypaper.net/criticalmass. (a_amorosi@citypaper.net)

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BEAUTIFUL FAKERS

Totem Fish by Jay McEvers

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By Annette Monnier

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cult, but imagine a lake frozen over solid enough to walk across the ice. Now imagine that a little shack has been dragged out onto the ice. Inside the shack it is dark, and in that darkness there is a man holding a spear. The man is waiting and watching, staring down into a glowing hole cut into the ice, light coming up reflected from the bottom of the lake. If you were to look into the hole, you would be able to see the fish swimming around in the ice-covered lake. The man with the spear doesn’t use live bait to attract his prey; instead he has a fish decoy, which he uses to lure fish in close enough to gouge them. This decoy may be shaped like a perch, bluegill or sucker, or it may only be vaguely fish-like in shape. The colors and markings on the fish could be realistic, or bright red with yellow polka dots; it all depends on what the real fish will bite. But the decoy itself is a technology (and, in its variations, an art form) that mankind has been working on for more than 3,000 years. When a tool stops being necessary to secure food, we become free to appreciate it for its aesthetic merits, and this is where “Hooked on Wood: The Allure of the Fish Decoy,” on view at The Center for Art in Wood, comes into play. The show is half history lesson and half celebration of a folk tradition named art after the fact, with pieces spanning millennia, region and a wide range of artistic intent. The oldest ones on display, like a prehistoric Alaskan decoy dating from 1,000 B.C., were created with no thought to ever being seen outside of the context of catching fish, while some contemporary makers have competitions, collectors or enthusiasts in mind, seeking to catch the eyes of humans rather than fish. The earliest known fish decoys were formed out of bone, antler, shell and ivory by North American natives in the Northwest, and they may be the earliest form of fake animal made to aid in hunting actual animals — they predate the oldest found duck decoys by roughly 1,000 years. Later, European immigrants to the area added their own methodologies, constructing false fish with metals, glass, wood and paint. The fabrication of ice-fishing lures grew in the late 19th century with commercial opportunities brought on by the Industrial

Revolution and experienced a need-based renaissance during the Great Depression. There’s something particularly magical about the simplest models here, many of which appear to have experienced some wear and tear in the field. Most novel are fish that look like barely transformed wood with wild color patterns, like Trout, formed by Charles Meloche in the 1920s. To understand how these color choices may have evolved from the straight replicas, imagine once again that fisherman in the dark shack. He’s been in there for hours, or days, focusing on that hole cut into the ice. As he waits, sometimes he carves new lures. If there’s a heat source going, the oxygen in the enclosed space grows thinner; with that and the monotony, he begins to consider what his fish facsimile would look like marbled with

Realistic, or bright red with yellow polka dots. aqua and covered with bright orange polka dots, and concludes “pretty good.” Perhaps he makes a big catch with this new decoy and brags about it later, and others take note. For this fisherman, the story would only get better if it ended at an art gallery in Philadelphia. (editorial@citypaper.net) ✚ “Hooked on Wood: The Allure of the Fish Decoy,” through July 21, Center for Art in Wood, 141 N. Third St., 215923-8000, centerforartinwood.org.

✚ DO STUFF. We live in a city with amazing things going on all the time; there’s no excuse for sitting at home. We help you keep up at citypaper.net/criticalmass.

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This program, including commissioning and presentation, has been supported by The Pew Center for Arts & Heritage through the Philadelphia Music Project and by the French American Cultural Exchange through The French-American Fund for Contemporary Music.

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Concerts in the Garden

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Safety Not Guaranteed

NEW LOLA VERSUS|C-

ROCK OF AGES|B Adam Shankman’s hair-metal musical comedy is clunky,

SAFETY NOT GUARANTEED|BMark Duplass isn’t your typical mad scientist, but then Safety Not Guaranteed isn’t your typical sci-fi flick. Colin Trevorrow’s quirky, low-key film is less concerned with the

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Fault Lena Dunham and her privileged, navel-gazing perspective all you want, but the shallow, arch Lola Versus may be enough to summon apologies from Girls’ critics, whose complaints seem much better suited to this Greta Gerwig vehicle. Spanning the year leading up to its title character’s 30th birthday, the film watches Gerwig shuffle between her commitment-phobic fiancée (Joel Kinnaman) and her best friend (Hamish Linklater). Both are “artists,” we’re told, more for indie cred than any impact that it makes on the story, which also features such warmed-over gimmickry as clownish dates (a pretentious roller-blading prison architect), off-the-wall avant-garde theater and a wacky sidekick — in this case, co-writer Zoe Lister-Jones, feeding herself every one-liner she’s ever jotted on a napkin, most featuring her daring use of the word “vagina.” Lister-Jones and boyfriend/co-writer Daryl Wein recently cropped up in a Funny or Die video proclaiming their love of rom-coms and chick flicks, gangsta-rap style. Those three minutes sum up their film’s failings in a nutshell: The “white people rapping about innocuous subjects” joke is a tired retread of SNL, among others, while the central joke substitutes self-aware winks for actual humor. Lola Versus, for all its “unconventional” signifiers, is just another by-the-numbers romantic comedy, its heroine’s self-absorption elevating romantic foibles to the level of grand tragedy. Try as she might, Greta Gerwig’s appeal simply can’t overcome Katherine Heigllevel material, and a few winks toward hipster hangouts can’t rescue multi-plex plotting. —Shaun Brady (Ritz Five)

often predictable and relentlessly silly. It’s also weirdly irresistible — mostly because Tom Cruise fucking brought it. The year is 1987. L.A.’s Sunset Strip is ground zero for dumb, passionate power ballads and an insistence that one requires nothin’ but a good time. Small-town girl Sherrie (Julianne Hough) rolls into the city, meets wannabe rocker boy Drew (Diego Boneta) and lands a job at the Bourbon Room, a legendary club that is somehow both in dire financial straits and one sold-out show away from salvation. The would-be savior is Stacee Jaxx (Cruise), a drunk, oversexed, emaciated/muscular Axl-ish rock god, booked to play his old haunt. After that, the plot gets wayward, but whatever. Alec Baldwin and Russell Brand are crack-ups as doofy club owners; Catherine Zeta-Jones is deliciously scary as a church-group leader; Paul Giamatti has some fine lines as the slimeball agent; and Malin Akerman is a hoot as an aggressively crimped Rolling Stone writer. Every five minutes at least one of them breaks fakely into song: “Sister Christian,” “Harden My Heart” mixed with “Shadows of the Night,” lots and lots of Poison. At the screening, the crowd went wild for Mary J. Blige, whose main role is singing the hard parts during montages. But in the end, this is Cruise’s movie. Despite his baboon sidekick, his giant steel codpiece and his apparent skill for making psychic connections with people by feeling them up, Jaxx might just be the cure for Rock of Ages’ relentless cartoonishness. He’s hilarious, but also overserious, tortured, real. Every rose has its thorn. —Patrick Rapa (Roxy, UA Riverview)

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Show us your Philly. Submit snapshots of the City of Brotherly Love, however you see it, at: photostream@citypaper.net

THE SUMMER’S BEST REVIEWED MOVIE!

history-changing possibilities of time travel than the human-level emotions that drive the desire to turn back the clock. Duplass’ eccentric loner Kenneth claims to have a time machine at the ready, but isn’t planning to assassinate Hitler or run with T-Rexes; he simply wants to revisit the day he blames for his own downfall. He places a classified ad (based on a real-life ad that instigated a brief Internet phenomenon) that’s discovered by a magazine reporter (Jake M. Johnson), who sees an easy subject for a mocking article. Intern Darius (Aubrey Plaza) tags along, though her above-it-all cynicism soon begins to peel away as she falls for Kenneth and uncovers her own emotional scars. Plaza has been practicing her sarcastic charm

on Parks and Recreation and she essentially plays a more emotionally resonant spin on that character here, while Duplass strikes the perfect balance between obsessed wacko and wounded soul — especially as some of his paranoia begins to seem justified. Their relationship, more than the mystery of whether Kenneth can back up his time-travel claims, forms the core of the film, though even Johnson’s slimy reporter reveals a desire to return to the past. In his case, it’s through a reunion with a former flame who turns out to be his ulterior motive for pursuing the story, but his pursuit of nostalgia is not far removed from Kenneth’s more fantastical mission. Ultimately, Johnson’s subplot feels half-hearted, and the stereotype-bend-

“Hnilar ious and heartfelt! enchanted ride of a movie. dream cast.” ROLLING STONE

PETER TRAVERS

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ing central characters are surrounded by actual, lazy stereotypes: Darius’ fellow intern is a nerdy IndianAmerican, while Johnson’s ex is a “real woman” who challenges his shallow assumptions. Trevorrow dials back his story’s grander implications a bit too much; by the time Kenneth unveils his time machine, neither the ending of the time machine working or it not working would be particularly satisfying, and the questions left unanswered aren’t compensated for by the offbeat but slight romance. —S.B. (Ritz Five)

SOMETHING FROM NOTHING: THE ART OF RAP A haiku: Ice-T directs this performance doc about rap. Spoiler: He likes it. (Not reviewed) (Ritz Five)

THAT’S MY BOY Read Chris Brown’s review at citypaper.net/movies. (UA Riverview)

Directed by

Wes Anderson

REPERTORY FILM ANDREW’S VIDEO VAULT

AUBREY PLAZA

MARK DUPLASS

JAKE JOHNSON

Written by

Wes Anderson & Roman Coppola

The Rotunda, 4014 Walnut St., armcinema25.com. The Red House (1947, U.S., 100 min.): An orphan and her friend explore a red house they are warned to avoid, and Brother Orchid (1940, U.S., 88 min.): Hunted down by old “friends,” a mobster goes into hiding as a monk. Thu., June 14, 8 p.m., free.

from the producers of LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE

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THE AWESOME FEST Race Street Pier, theawesomefest.com. The Sheik and I (2012, U.S., 106 min.): Hired by members of the Middle

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Eastern Biennial to make a film about art as a subversive act, a filmmaker makes fun of the film’s financing sheik and gets in trouble. Sat., June 16, 8 p.m., free.

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GERSHMAN Y 401 S. Broad St., 215-545-4400, gershmany.org. Matinee (1993, U.S., 99 min.): A B-movie producer tries to promote his new campy film in Key West during the middle of the Cuban Missile Crisis. Wed., June 20, 7:30 p.m., $10.

DAILY VARIETY

INTERNATIONAL HOUSE

MAUSOLEUM HORROR CONVENTION PhilaMOCA, 532 N. 12th St., 267519-9651, philamoca.org. Manborg (2011, Canada, 60 min.): A half-man, half-cyborg soldier is resurrected to fight Nazi vampires and demons, and Comforting Skin (2011, Canada, 109 min.): A sensitive woman’s tattoo tries to boink her silly. Sat., June 16, 10 p.m., $7-$12.

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FIT FOR A KING

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³ THE DUCK WAS dark and full of terrors. I

LEG UP: The frog’s legs bar snack at Rittenhouse Tavern is a clever take on jalapeño poppers. NEAL SANTOS

[ review ]

MUSEUM QUALITY Housed in the Art Alliance, Rittenhouse Tavern showcases the stunning work of a former Le Bec-Fin chef. By Adam Erace RITTENHOUSE TAVERN | 251 S. 18th St., 215-732-2412, rittenhousetavern.com. Lunch served Tues.-Fri., 11:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m.; brunch Sat.-Sun. 11 a.m.-3 p.m.; dinner served Tues.-Thurs., 5-10 p.m.; Sun. 5-9 p.m.; Fri.-Sat. 511 p.m. Bar snacks $6-$11; appetizers $11-$16; entrées, $15-$29; desserts, $9.

hen the crystal chandeliers dimmed for Nicholas Elmi, he didn’t have to travel very far. Three blocks plus change separate Le Bec-Fin, where Elmi was chef for three years, and his new kitchen, the comparatively casual Rittenhouse Tavern, tucked in the back of the majestic Philadelphia Art Alliance. “It’s a breath of fresh air,” says 31-year-old More on: Elmi. “I feel like doing something a little more fun right now. I don’t want to spend 365 days a year in fine dining anymore.” Elmi will bristle like a toothbrush if you say he’s trading down. But even he has to admit Rittenhouse Tavern’s nuts and bolts, from the instant-mashed-potatoes name to the looming shadow of corporate ownership — it’s the first freestanding operation for mega-caterer Restaurant Associates — do him no favors. After Le Bec, I’d think a cook of his talent and pedigree would be making moves on his own place, somewhere small and offbeat and chef-

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driven, not trading one babysitter for another. The octopus legs, writhing through a scene of black-pudding puree, tiny violet potatoes and fresh and pickled apricots, sure made me look dumb. This first stunning presentation (inspired by the octopus chandeliers in the current “Shiny Monsters” exhibit, housed in an Art Alliance gallery) made it clear Rittenhouse Tavern is chefdriven. Or chefs-driven, if you count the influence of Restaurant Associates VP of food and beverage Ed Brown, who sired the recipes for the crab cakes and a fair mushroom soup accessorized, via Elmi, with crushed cocoa nibs and a cappuccino-like froth of black-walnut milk. Elmi has put power and creativity behind this menu, and his corporate overlords don’t seem concerned with micromanaging his use of black garlic, ice plant, foie or frog’s legs. This is a very good thing. The last one turned up in a new-school take on jalapeño poppers, the legs piped full of lemony cream-cheese mousse, breaded and fried crisp. They looked like dollhouse MORE FOOD AND drumsticks, served upright on green dots DRINK COVERAGE of zippy arugula-and-watercress puree, AT C I T Y P A P E R . N E T / their handles encircled by bracelets of M E A LT I C K E T. pickled finger pepper, the source of the fruity, refreshing heat. Give me these, some tequila and a shot of the housemade kaffir soda, and I’ll be a happy guy for a few hours at Rittenhouse Tavern’s snug little bar. Or better yet, in the leafy garden with its herbal perfume and sun-warmed bricks. Inside, the Tavern spreads its 70 seats across the back of the Art Alliance. Geese in tones of jade and hazy gold hover above the tables >>> continued on page 36

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leered at the 6-pound Lancaster specimen as it defrosted, contemplating the best way to attack. It was missing its organs, but still had its neck, a long, fleshy extension I’d unsuccessfully tried to hack through. As a fairly knowledgeable home cook, I’ve roasted whole birds before, but never a duck, with its thick blanket of fat, bulbous legs and inconvenient neck. I blame A Feast of Ice and Fire (May 29, 240 pp. Bantam), the official companion cookbook to HBO’s Emmy-winning series Game of Thrones (based on George R. R. Martin’s series of vivid, intricate, genre-bending fantasy novels, A Song of Ice and Fire). The chapter of recipes from Dorne, the blistering southern region of Martin’s fictional realm of Westeros, included a duck dish that looked too good not to try. I stuffed the bird with lemons and glazed it with a reduction of lemon, olive oil, honey, chili powder and pepper before roasting it in the oven, soon dizzy with the heady aroma that filled my kitchen. I swear I had smelled it before, as well as countless other evocative food perfumes, while reading Martin’s books; the juicy, tantric detail he uses in describing what his characters are eating is a hallmark of the series. From a royal wedding feast in King’s Landing to an austere breakfast on the Wall, it’s hard not to crave what the kings, queens, outlaws and exiles are craving. (Except perhaps honeyed dormice and unborn puppies, delicacies in the slaver cities to the east across the Narrow Sea.) Amateur chefs and superfans Chelsea Monroe-Cassel and Sariann Lehrer began writing recipes for dishes mentioned in the Ice and Fire books on their blog, Inn at the Crossroads. With Martin’s blessing, A Feast of Ice and Fire was born shortly thereafter. Instead of organizing this cookbook by course or ingredient, Monroe-Cassel and Lehrer split it up into regions: the Wall, the North, the South, King’s Landing, Dorne and “Across the Narrow Sea.” The writing is plain and the photography sedate, but the recipes are straightforward and reliable. After two hours in the oven, the duck emerged caramelized and crispy, its flesh tangy and sweet from the lemonhoney glaze it absorbed during cooking. I was even more impressed with the recipe for apple-and-date-flecked oat bread; I’m no baker, but these twin loaves came out beautifully. The first didn’t make it through the night, the second through the following morning. Guess I’ll just have to bake up a few extra. No sense in not being prepared: Winter is coming, after all. (adam.erace@citypaper.net)

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[ food & drink ]

20122013 YOUR PREMIER MAGAZINE FEATURING EVERYTHING PHILLY!

✚ Museum Quality <<< continued from page 35

CITY GUIDE

Casual is the operative adjective, but the atmosphere is old money.

highlights Philly’s unique neighborhoods showcasing restaurants, galleries, bars, clubs, boutiques, retail shops, markets, music venues and more! PUBLICATION DATE: AUGUST 23 SPACE RESERVATION DEADLINE: JULY 11

C I T Y PA P E R ’ S G U I D E T O P H I L A D E L P H I A

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FEELS BETTER THAN IT SOUNDS Tuesdays 10pm-2am on 19th Between Chestnut and Market

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in a mural that wraps the main dining room like morning mist. Richard Blossom Farley, who painted them in the 1920s, would no doubt be pleased they’ve been preserved by designer Elisabeth Knapp (Zahav). In the lounge, a Carrera marble fireplace yawns, wealthy and bored. Thick moldings frame every doorway and window. Casual might be Rittenhouse Tavern’s operative adjective, but the atmosphere is as old money as high tea on the Titanic. Salvaged-wood surfaces, distressed-leather accents and a staff in jeans help to leaven the mood, but the challenge falls mostly to Elmi, who responds with the city’s most lucid fluke crudo. The kombu-cured fish curled down a plate, infant fronds of dill, chive and pearls of sweet lemon puree as green and yellow as a Packers jersey against the fluke. Each bite burst with citrus that vanished with a crunch of shaved radish and tingle of crushed pink pepper. Even at $16, the fluke (an inexpensive fish) is a dish worth overpaying for, but it’s not the only overpriced item on the menu. While nothing crosses the $30 threshold and entrées are generally reasonable, most of the bar snacks and starters could all drop a dollar or two. Or five, if we’re talking about the Thai mussels, whose holy basil must be blessed by Buddha to command an outlandish $18. Halibut, quickly cured and perfectly cooked, supported a tangle of briny sea bean tips and ivory wriggles of thinsliced poached squid. I loved the unexpected treatment of calamari here, a chewy accent against the snappy beans and rich fish. Those three elements create a perfect storm of texture, but unfortunately, this is not a perfect dish; the thin lobster/uni broth in which the halibut resides lacked power, and while I appreciated the crunch from fried grains of wild rice, the molar I almost cracked did not. Blushing Campari-and-rhubarb broth was another slight misfire, a twinge too bitter for tall seared scallops wearing pea-leaf ’fros. But the mollusks shone, looking smart in their seasonal attire of shaved white asparagus, rhubarb, peas and tarragon-pea puree. Without the Campari, this would be the dish of spring 2012. A pity we’ll never get to taste a correction, as Elmi has already switched the scallop prep to include Hakurei turnips, farro and yuzu. (The halibut has also recently been replaced with a turbo dish.) Rhubarb is still around, though, treated three ways in one of the stunning desserts, a bowl of nutty, crumby brown-butter cake and crème-fraiche sorbet. There were points of poached rhubarb, lavender-perfumed gelee, even rhubarb soup. A waiter streamed the sweet-andsour liquid over the dessert, its clear, quartz-pink color echoed in the lavender blossoms orbiting the inside of the bowl. It was the best dessert I’ve had in recent memory. But it wasn’t the only one. Inky blueberry soup toed the line between sweet and savory with red wine, port, thyme streusel and cool, unusual lemon-and-sage ice cream. Elmi served this vivacious soup during his tasting audition for Rittenhouse Tavern. No wonder he got the job. (adam.erace@citypaper.net)

gracetavern.com

Fresh Salads and Sandwiches Happy Hour with Craft Beer 215.789.6136 1701 Locust Street Philadelphia, PA 19103

PIZZA PUB E H South Philly T

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220 S 17th St., Philadelphia, PA 19103 215.790.1799 | Tavern17Restaurant.com

By Matt Jones

“GQ POSEURS” — SO NOT WHAT THEY SEEM

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food | the agenda | a&e | feature | the naked city

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jonesin’

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✚ ACROSS

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1 5 11 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 23 25 26 31 32 33 35 36 37 40 41 45 47 49 51 52 57 58 59

Like some mattresses Cat of many colors Cranberry growing site Bailiwick ___ acid Number one prefix? Table salt, in chemistry class Noah’s mountain Summer Olympics city after London Worked hard on a mathematical proof? Bollywood’s home Agent’s activity Leading figure on a long journey? Really slow, on sheet music Hash browns, e.g. Nobel Prize-winning novelist Gordimer oadside bomb letters ___ vert (green bean, in French cuisine) Not working today Separately Scotch mixer Play with blocks Voyage to see the world’s great bedcovers? Movie that spawned the spoof Scary Movie Up the ante Marketer’s popularity quotient for Limburger? Curvy letter 100 percent Comedian Cook

62 My Big Fat Greek Wedding star Vardalos 63 Elvis Costello hit 64 Controversial radio host Don 65 Be a gourmand 66 Highest-quality 67 The largest one-digit square

✚ DOWN 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 21 22 23 24 27 28 29 30 34 36

___ interference (baseball ruling) 401(k) alternative Went out slowly Sick-and-tired feeling James who played Sonny Corleone Farm measure Heavy metal Macy Gray’s first hit song Genoa goodbyes One of Nadya Suleman’s kids, e.g. Trademarked swimsuit that covers everything except the face Cuban region from the Spanish for “East” Words uttered in disbelief Word after mole or mall Bread in a Seinfeld episode Stanford-Binet test scores Rapa ___ (Easter Island) Completely lose it Former Iraqi Deputy Prime Minister Aziz Word that may be bid Actress Christina of 2012’s Bel Ami Mad Dogs and Englishmen writer Coward Quit standing

37 Warranting “Parental Advisory” stickers, maybe 38 Reddish-purple shade 39 Aims for 41 Substitute 42 Hobby of in-creasing popularity? 43 Slam 44 Big galoot 46 Incredible Hulk co-creator Stan 48 Beef ___-tip 50 ___ Park (Thomas Edison’s home) 53 It goes in one ear, gets flipped, then into the other 54 Increase 55 Elvis’s middle name, per his death certificate 56 Mind 60 Agnes of God extra 61 Ending for legal or crossword

Save BIG on Legendary Omaha Steaks® World-famous Omaha Steaks, aged to perfection, flash-frozen at the peak of flavor and delivered to your door... 100% guaranteed!

Thrill Dad! Father’s Day is June 17th.

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Call Free 1-866-568-9897 • ZZZ 2PDKD6WHDNV FRP GDG

HOT Guys! HOT Chat! Hot FUN! Try FREE! Call 888779-2789 PREGNANT? CONSIDERING ADOPTION?

Talk with caring agency specializing in matching Birthmothers with Families nationwide. LIVING EXPENSES PAID. Call 24/7 Abby’s One True Gift Adoptions 866-4136293

Public Notices AIRLINE CAREERS

SAWMILLS

SAWMILLS from only $3,997MAKE MONEY & SAVE MONEY with your own bandmill-Cut lumber any dimension. In stock ready to ship. FREE info & DVD: www.norwoodsawmills. com/300N 1-800-578-1363 Ext. 300N. WANTED TO BUY

WANTED UNEXPIRED DIABETIC TEST STRIPS: Up to $26.00/Box. PRE-PAID SHIPPING LABELS. Hablamo Espanol. 1-800-266-0702 www. SellDiabeticStrips.com

Business Services REGULAR MASSAGE THERAPY

Special Price! $45/hr. Call (215)-873-4835. 1218 Chestnut St.

PennSCAN ADOPTION

A childless, financially secure couple (37&42) seeks to adopt. Together 18 years. Flexible work schedules. Expenses paid. Call Rich & Tim 1-800-494-4533.

EARN COLLEGE DEGREE ONLINE

Medical, Business, Criminal Justice, Job Placement assistance. Computer available. Financial Aid if qualified. SCHEV Certified. Call 888-220-3984. www.Centuraonline.com HELP WANTED

AVERITT is looking for CDLA Drivers! Great, Low-Cost Benefits Package and Weekly Hometime. 4 -months T/T experience Required. Apply Now! 888-362-8608. Visit AVERITTcareers.com Equal Opportunity Employer HELP WANTED

Drivers - CDL-A DRIVERS NEEDED! Up to $5,000 Signon Bonus for experienced Drivers! New Student pay AND Lease Program now available! 877-521-5775 www.USATruck. jobs HELP WANTED

Out of High School? Over 18? Your 1st Phenomenal Opportunity to Travel While Earning Big $$$. No Experience necessary. Paid Training. Transportation/ Lodging Provided. 1-877-6465050. HELP WANTED DRIVER

Drivers: New Freight Lanes in your area. Annual Salary $45K to $60K. Flexible hometime. Modern Fleet of trucks. CDL_A, 3-Months current OTR experience. 800-414-9569 www. driveknight.com INTERNET

Bundle & Save on your CABLE, INTERNET PHONE & MORE. High Speed Internet starting at less than $20/mo. CALL NOW! 1-800-314-9361 LAND FOR SALE

NY Land & Cabin Bargain Sale: Classic Adirondack Camp 5 acres - $29,995. Cozy CabinBase Camp 5 acres - $19,995. Near 1000’s of acres of Stateland, lakes, & rivers. Access

to snowmobile & ATV trails. Our best deal ever! Call 800229-7843. See pics at www. landandcamps.com LAND FOR SALE

Potter County: 17 wooded acres adjoining state forest lands. Great hunting in area, close to fishing streams. Perc, electric. $72,900. Owner financing. 800-668-8679 LAND FOR SALE

WATERFRONT PROPERTY SALE, NY: 8 acres waterfront home $99,900. 5 acres West Bass Pond $19,900. 5 Acres Deer Creek Forest $14,900. Financing available. www. landfirstNY.com 1-888-6832626 MISC/PERSONALS

Meet SIngles right now! No paid operators, just real people like you. Browse greetings, exchange messages and connect live. Try it for free. Call 1-800-914-8742 NOTICES

Pursuant to @128.85 of the Pennsylvania Department of Agriculture Title 7 Regulations, GROWMARK FS, LLC. hereby gives notice of ground application of “Restricted Use Pesticides” for the protection of agricultural crops in municipalities in Pennsylvania during the next 45 days. Residents of contiguous property to our application sites should contact your local GROWMARK FS, LLC. facility for additional infor mation. Concer ned citizens should contact: Michael Layton, MGR> Safety & Environment, mlayton@ growmarkfs,com GROWMARK FS, LLC. 308 N.E. Front Street, Milford, DE 19963. Call 302-422-3002

Help Wanted

Resort/ Vacation Property for Sale

HELP WANTED

LIVE-WORK-PARTY-PLAY! Play in Vegas, Hang in LA, Jet to New York! Hiring 18-24 girls/ guys. $400-$800 wkly. Paid expenses. Signing Bonus. Call 1-866-251-0768. HELP WANTED DRIVER

Exp. Reefer Drivers: GREAT PAY/Freight lanes from Presque Isle, ME, Boston-Lehigh, PA. 800-277-0212 or primeinc.com HELP WANTED DRIVER

NEW TO TRUCKING? Your new career starts now! *$0 Tuition Cost *No Credit Check *Great Pay & Benefits. Short employment commitment required. Call: (866) 447-0377 www.joinCRST.com HELP WANTED!!!

Make money Mailing brochures from home! FREE Supplies! Helping HomeWorkers since 2001! Genuine Opportunity! No experience required. Start immediately! www.theworkhub.net $$$HELP WANTED$$$

Extra Income! Assembling CD cases from Home! No Experience Necessary! Call our Live Operator Now! 1-800-4057619 Ext. 2450 http://www. easywork-greatpay.com

Situations Wanted JOB WANTED LOOK!!!

I am looking for work...I am a General Helper that can do anything. You name it.... reliable dependable morning person. Frank 267-9180516.

listings with photos and maps. Find your roommate with a click of the mouse! Visit: http://www. Roommates.com.

VACATION RENTALS

OCEAN CITY, MARYLAND. Best selection of affordable rentals. Full/partial weeks. Call for FREE brochure. Open daily. Holiday Real Estate.1-800-6382102 Online reservations: www. holidayoc.com.

Apartments for Rent ?? GOT BED BUGS ??

All areas - Best rates! 267994-4815

Homes 4XX HOFFMAN (PENNSPORT AREA)

Newly Renovated Modern 3 Bedroom, Hardwood Floors, New Carpet, New Tile Kitchen & Bath, Fridge, W/D,Yard. $795. Call Pete: 267-307-0371 5XX PORTER STREET (SOUTH PHILLY)

Just Renovated, New Kitchen, New Bathroom, New Hardwood Floors, Fridge, Washer/Dryer, Garbage Disposal, $950. Call Pete: 267-307-0371 6XX MCCLELLAN STREET

Modern 3 Bedroom Home, Hardwood Floors, Ceramic Tiled Bathroom & Kitchen, Newly Carpeted Bedrooms, Washer, Fridge, $850/month. Call Pete: 267307-0371

Roommates ALL AREAS-ROOMATES. COM

Browse hundreds of online

Rental Wanted APARTMENT WANTED FOR MYSELF!

I am currently looking in Center City a one or two bedroom 1st floor front or Rent vacant unit rented. 2 months down. Older male. Ask for Frank 267-918-0516.

Vacation/ Seasonal Rental BRIGANTINE

Pets OK. Available 6/21-6/24 $575; July/August $1350/ week; 9/2-9/9 $1025; 9/99/16 $925. www.BrigB.com 856-217-0025 JULY & AUGUST QV TRINITY

Pleasant Trinity on (mostly) quiet alley with one bedroom in heart of Queen Village. Rear yard, airy bedroom, den, full k i t c h e n w / D a c o r ra n g e, washer/dryer, Jenn-Air Fridge, Dishwasher, fully equipped. Available July 1 - August 31. $825 per month. $300 utility cost deposit. Discount for full payment. WARNING: A Trinity is tiny and unique, top floor bedroom, small den and bathroom on second floor, living room on first. Basement with kitchen and light shaft. The 1850s stairway treads are small, uneven and irregular.. Please consider your physical agility when considering this rental. REPLIES W/O PHONE NUMBERS AND SOME PERSONAL DETAILS WILL BE DELETED South Third Street at Queen Street

ADOP

MASHED POTATO!

I’m Mashed Potato, a 2-4 year old boy with stunning blue eyes. I love ear scratches and tummy rubs, so get ready for an affectionate cat! Sometimes I play in my water bowl because I’m such a silly guy. I’ll gladly live with kids and other pets, as long as they’re nice to me. Because I have a sensitive tummy, I need to stay on a grain-free diet. Located on the corner of 2nd and Arch. All PAWS animals are spayed/neutered, vaccinated, and microchipped before adoption. For more information, call 215-238-9901 ext. 30 or email adoptions@phillypaws.org

215.670.9535

WWW.MAMBOMOVERS.COM

@2?C602@

Torchia & Associates

CONCIERGE LEGAL SERVICES GENERAL PRACTICE – ESTATE & TAX PLANNING

1420 Walnut Street, Suite 1216 215-546-1950; watorchia@gmail.com www.generallawfirm.com

(Rain Date - Sat, 6/23) ALONG PINE AND LOMBARD FROM 3RD TO 5TH STREETS

9AM TIL 5PM BUT EARLY BIRDS ARE WELCOME! FREE PARKING IN THE LOT ON THE 300 BLOCK OF LOMBARD STREET. PROCEEDS BENEFIT OLD PINE AND ST. PETER’S CHURCH. More Info:

215 - 625 - FLEA (3532) FOR A LIST OF OUR CITY FLEA MARKETS Log Onto:

www.PhilaFleaMarkets.org

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3/#)%49 (),, 6).4!'% &,%! -!2+%4

This Sat, June 16th GENTLY MOVING YOUR EARTHLY POSSESSIONS

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begin here-Become an Aviation Maintenance Tech. FAA approved training. Financial aid if qualified-Housing available. Job placement assistance. CALL Aviation Institute of Maintenance 888834-9715.

$2500 Sign-on Bonus! Super Service is hiring solo and team drivers. Great Benefits Package. CDL-A required. Students Welcome. Call 888-441-9358 or apply online at www.superservicellc.com

PHOTO BY NEAL SANTOS

HOT GUYS AND GALS!

COMPANY DRIVERS

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food | the agenda | a&e | feature | the naked city classifieds

everything pets pets/livestock

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J U N E 1 4 - J U N E 2 0 , 2 0 1 2 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T

Please be aware Possession of exotic/wild animals may be restricted in some areas.

BEAGLE pups - AKC, 7 weeks, 1st shots/wormed, males. $350. 14 month old male, all shots, $200. 215-547-6314 BICHON PUPS - 3 month, playful, cute, shots, papers, $500. 267-978-7543 BOXER PUPPIES - AKC, parents on premises. Ready now. $800/ea. 267-912-8540 CANE CORSO 3 month old male, CKC reg’d, 1st shots, tails docked, parents on premises, $600. Call (215)324-2520 Cocker Spaniel M/F, Ready now, shots/ vet checked, $350. 267-242-3408 COCKER SPANIEL Pups, Home Raised, Champion bloodlines. 856-299-0451 COLLIES PUPS 4 whites! Sable F, 4 yrs, normal eyes, Ch. stock. (856)825-4856 DOGUE DE BORDEAUX - 2 Females, parent on site $400. 215-303-4302 Dogue de Bordeaux Shots and deworming Big healthy pups $1200 717-629-1450 English Bulldog Champion Sired beautiful Bully pups $2000 Champion sired beautiful bullys, with remarkable markings. Sire just won Lancaster, Pa best of breed. Dont be mislead these are Not mill puppies. I breed to better the breed. I will personally deliver the puppies to Philly, NYC, and some areas of New Jersey for a small fee. 717-480-7966 GERMAN SHEPHERD - Blk & Tan, 1 Wh, farm raised, vet checked. 610-273-7177 German Shepherd pups, 3M, 4F, blk/ beige, s/w, papers, $375. 267-736-0502 Goldendoodles Paper trained, home raised, great with kids, shots. Vet recommended. 610-799-0612

Golden Retriever, 10 week F, AKC, vet chkd, family raised, $500. 717-435-3622

Golden Retriever male, pup, ready, vet chkd, shots wormed, $500. 717-442-5657

Golden Retriever Pups AKC, male & fem, home raised, ready 6/7. (610)286-5502 Great Dane Puppies: AKC, brindle colored, Parents on premises. Reduced to $800. Call 302-764-3184 /302-379-3423 Great Dane Pups AKC, fawn, blk masks, parents on site $600. 302-266-0934 Great Danes: rare blue, ch. lines, avail. 6/18, $2000. 25 yrs exp. 610-273-9876 HAVANESE Pups- family raised, these puppies use a lot of love and attention and love kids $350. 717-419-6698 LAB PUPS 100% GUAR. READY NOW, MUST COME SEE!!! 215-768-4344 LAB pups, AKC, English & chmp lines, choc & yllow, ex. pets, broad hds, parents on prem, hlth guar $500. 717-354-2674 Lab Pups, AKC, s/w, home raised, health guar. 610-944-3609 or 610-506-7109

Labradoodle Pups, black, brown & light s & w, vet chk, family pets, 610.496.4253 Labrador Retriever Choc Pups $800 AKC ready 6/27 champ stud 610-368-3387.

Maltese Pups - 2M, 2F, parents on premises, ready June 11th. Call 267-992-4252 Miniature Schnauzer puppies, ACA reg., family raised & vet checked, health guarantee! Ready to go $500. 717-336-8345 Pit Bulls Blues $2000 (717)715-6981 www.bullycountrypitbulls.com

Poodle Puppies: Standard, 10 weeks, home raised, multiple colors, females $500, males $400. 610-489-3781 SHELTIE Pups, AKC, Sable and white. Call (856)863-4135 SHIH TZU Puppies, Shots and wormed, $350, 717-354-7046 Yorkie pups, AKC, very small, 3-5lbs, ready June 9, Call 717-278-0932

merchandise market BRAZILIAN FLOORING 3/4", beautiful, $2.75 sf (215) 365-5826 CABINETS SOLID MAPLE Brand new soft close/dovetail. Fits 10’x10’ kitchen. More cabinets if needed. Cost $6,400. Sell $1,595. 610-952-0033 Diabetic Test Strips needed pay up to $15/box. Most brands. Call 610-453-2525 Living Rm 5pc set, a sleeping sofa & a 27in Sony NBR trinitron TV 973-420-5878

BD a Memory Foam Mattress/BoxsprIng Brand New Queen cost $1400, sell $299; King cost $1700 sell $399. 610-952-0033 Bd a Queen Pillow top matt set $175; King $250 mem foam $295. 215-752-0911 BED: New Queen Pillow Top Set $150 . twin, full, king avail. Del avl 215-355-3878 Bedroom Set 5 pc. brand new $399 All sizes, Del. Avail. 215-355-3878 Bedroom set 6 pc. Cherry Brand new, in box $499. 215-752-0911 HAIR SALON FURNITURE 8 Stations, desk, shampoo, etc. B/O. 610-506-8157

GUITAR: Gray Line 1883, mint cond. accepting best offer. (267)334-8002

2012 Hot Tub/Spa. Brand New! 6 person w/lounger, Cover. Factory warranty. Never installed! Beautiful. Cost $6,000. Ask $2,500. Will deliver. 610-952-0033

24 KARAT GOLD COIN, 1933: PROOF accepting best offer. (267)334-8002

ABC TICKETS PHILLIES

BUY and SELL LOST COCKATIEL: gray female, Ridge & Roosevelt Expwy, missing 5/28, REWARD for return. (201)389-3992 or 906-4359

Merged with GOOD TIME TICKETS

800.355.5555

• SPORTS • CONCERTS www.abctickets.com • THEATRE BUYING EAGLES SBL’s & TICKETS

Get better matches to your job opportunities with unprecedented efficiency.

CALL 215-669-1924

EAGLES 2 Season Tickets Section 121, Row 4, (42 yard line) Best Offer. moriarty1@ymail.com. 941-751-0478

33 & 45 Records Absolute Higher $

* * * 215-200-0902 * * *

33&45 RECORDS HIGHER $ REALLY PAID

** Bob 610-532-9408 ***

apartment marketplace

jobs

Books -Trains -Magazines -Toys Dolls - Model Kits 610-689-8476

Coins, Currency, Gold, Toys,

Trains, Hummels, Sports Cards. Call the Local Higher Buyer, 7 Dys/Wk

Locust at Broad Lux studio Condo $975 incl util, gym, C/A, wifi, d/w 856.234.6491 House Cleaner LOOKING FOR WORK reasonable rates. 267-259-5197

Dr. Sonnheim, 856-981-3397

20th & Brandywine 1br $900+utils spacious, avail. now, 610-908-9330

I Buy Anything Old...Except People! antiques-collectables, Al 215-698-0787 Lionel/Am Flyer/Trains/Hot Whls $$$$ Aurora TJet/AFX Toy Cars 215-396-1903 SAXOPHONES, WWII, SWORDS, related items, Lenny3619@aol 609.581.8290

To learn more or to find the right person for your job, visit your local partner at philly.com/monster

14xx Snyder 2br $875 heat & water incl. newly renovated, new appliances, great location, available now, 267-250-3269 15xx 9th St. Near Italian Market 2br modern, heat incl, no pets, 856-858-4830

jobs AUDITOR

MEDICAL CLAIMS PROCESSOR

Immediate Fulltime employment. CC Fringe Benefit Fund in construction trade seeks an individual who is selfmotivated, energetic, aggressive, and has good communication skills. Must have a vehicle and valid driver’s license. E-mail resume with salary requirement to collections@philacarpenter.org

Immediate Fulltime employment. Philadelphia Benefit Fund seeks an experienced medical claims processer, who is dependable, highly motivated, energetic and has excellent communication and organizational skills. E-mail resume with salary requirements to fundadmin@philacarpenter.org

Philadelphia, PA

Sales Representative

Eastern PA, NJ & Delaware

BioFit Engineered Products, a long-standing leader in ergonomic seating, cafeteria & mobile tables, plus multi-purpose carts and specialty products for office, educational, laboratory, industrial, high & biotech, healthcare, hospitality and custom environments has an immediate opening for a Sales Representative for our eastern PA, NJ & Delaware territory. The successful candidate will reside within the geographic area. The position plans, directs and coordinates all marketing and sales efforts in the territory by supporting existing customers and developing new opportunities through an estabMoorestown, NJ Custom Machinery Mfg. in lished dealer network. A minimum of Philadelphia NJ. Must have 5 years outside/field sales experiImmediate need for owner operators Moorestown, ence working with product lines that with a 26ft refrigerated straight Solidworks Exp. BSME preferred. complement our business & products truck over 26,001 lbs. Scheduled Complete Benefits Package. is required. Fax 1-856-234-8657 or routes. Dynamex is seeking IndeWe offer a "draw against commispendent Contractors to deliver 5 to 6 E-mail dstein@ackleymachine.com sion" compensation program, car aldays per week in a recession proof lowance plus an excellent benefit commodity. Previous courier experipackage. Submit resume, cover letence preferred. Must pass Criminal ter & salary history in confidence to: Background check, MVR and a drug facility located in Newark, DE allen.radlinski@biofit.com test. Call 877-831-2461 Skilled machinists for large manual/ BioFit Engineered Products CNC machine tools. Must have expe15500 Biofit Way rience on large VTLs (manual and Bowling Green, OH 43402 CNC) and/or HBMs. Fully competent EOE interpreting blue prints, part specifications and using all types of measuring instruments. Able to perform machine setups. Top rate will be offered to the most experienced candidates. F/T with O/T for 2nd & 3rd MERCER COUNTY, NJ shifts with 10% shift differential. CPA required. Exp w/ Int’l cash To learn more or to find the right sweeping a +. Some overseas travel Email resume to person for your job, visit your local req’d. $150K/yr, full benefits. mfgmachineshop@gmail.com partner at philly.com/monster EOE HR@Crest-Ultrasonics.com

CDL Courier Drivers

Machine Design Engineer

MACHINIST

GLOBAL CONTROLLER

homes for rent 21st & Erie, large room, new renov., wall/wall, furn. $100/wk. 215-570-0301

60th & Cobbs Creek pkwy 1br $600+util hardwood flrs, eat in kitch (215)439-1372 6401 Saybrook off Woodland Efficiency $450. Security dep. Call 610-358-1649 65th/Woodland Vic 1br, Efficiency also apts in other areas. 267-671-7848

N. Ruby St. 1BR $450+utils 1st floor, freshly painted, Call (610)622-7528 between 8am-5pm Parkside Area Furnished 1BR starting @ $750. Newly renov, new kit & bath, hdwd flrs, Section 8 OK. 267-324-3197

6239 Haverford Ave 2br $750+utils 1st flr, 5 room, back yard, 215-747-9098 OVERBROOK 1 BR $575 Nice 1 room, $400. Call 215-817-5448 Various 1 & 2 BR Apts $750-$895 www.perutoproperties.com 215.740.4900 Wynnewood Rd 2BR $750 3rd flr, 3 mo sec, credit chk (215)871-0512

Balwynne Park 2BR $850+utils W/D, C/A, W/W. Call 484-351-8633

53rd & Montgomery Ave. 2br $700+util Nice apt., $2100 move in. (484)278-4025 53xx Arlington St 2br $800+utils 1st, last & security, renovated, 1st flr, priv entry, small yard, storage, large LR, dining area, porch, eat in kitchen, 215-877-9472

21xx N. 30th St 1BR $600 incl utils, renovated, 215-492-9686 32nd & Diamond 1BR APT $600/Mo READY NOW. $1350 TO MOVE IN. ALL UTILITIES INCLUDED Lisa 267-516-7917

1,2, 3, 4 Bedroom FURNISHED APTS LAUNDRY-PARKING 215-223-7000

13xx Mt. Pleasant Ave. 1BR $695 1st flr, EIK, close to transp. 215.313.5132 3xx E Upsal St. 2 BR $740+ utils new renov, $1600 move-in 610.675.7586

Broad Oaks 1BR & 2BR Lndry rm. Special Discount! 215-681-1723

E. OAK LANE 1br $695 & 2Br $850 heat included, near transp. 267-253-8431

3252 Frankford Ave. 1BR $500+elec LR, eat in kitchen, 2nd floor unit, newly renovated. Call (215) 624-7100

16xx Granite St. 1)BR` $600/mo $1800 move-in. w/w carpet 215.356.8717 42xx Frankford Ave 1Br $475+utils 3rd floor, $1425 move-in. 215-559-9289 42xx Frankford Efficiency $500/mo. 2nd Flr, near transp. Call 215-289-2973 4645 Penn St. 1BR $625. newly renov gas/wtr inc 215-781-8072

59xx Old York Rd 1BR $625+utils 3rd flr, w/w, g/d, tile kitch 215-224-1010 6021 N. Park Ave 1 BR $600+ 1 month & security. (215)480-6460

11xx S. 23rd St. 2BR/2BA $850. Rehab. Granite, c/a Greg 215-668-3990

24xx N 10th rooms $300 to move in $100/wk Call Greg 215-668-3990 25th & Oxford St. 63rd & Ogontz, West Oaklane $90/week. 267-629-0255

1348 Wilder St. 3br/1ba $725+ utils Call Erik 215.744. 5750 or 215.510.0034

28xx N 27th St: Furnished rooms, utils included, $100/wk, SSI ok, 267-819-5683

16XX S Etting, 3br hse, refrig, n e w paint/crpt yd pch $775+ 267-645-9421

32nd & Diamond/ 20th & Susquehanna NEW ROOMS 4 RENT. 400/month. 500 to MOVE IN. CALL LISA: 267-516-7917

18xx S Ringgold St. 3BR $700+utils w/w crpt, $2100 move-in 610-202-9833

33rd St & Ridge Ave $100-125/wk . Large renovated furnished rooms near Fairmount Park & bus depot 215.317.2708

34th and Baring Room for rent. Nice rm w/ DirecTV. Use of kit. Call 215-620-3846 48th & Paschall Sts. and 31st & Ridge rooms for rent starting from $80$125/wk. 267-228-1143.

507 E. Walnut Lane: Rooms for rent, $125/wk, utils included. 215-760-0206

60xx Torresdale Ave 1br $600+utils storage, section 8 ok. Call 267-992-3233 65xx Torresdale Ave. 1br $600+ no pets, section ok, Call 215-539-7866

99xx Lorry Place 2br $800+utils 1st, last, sec, good credit 570.974.1858 Academy & Grant 2BR $795+ 1st flr,w/w, c/a,off st prkg 856.346.0747 Bridge & Pratt 1BR $475+elec, gas 215-613-8989 or 267-746-8696

56xx Chew Ave., nr Lasalle Univ. & public transp., furnished rooms, $600/ mo., 1st, last, sec., utils incl (267)315-0003

5743 Cedar: LOOK nice rooms for rent, w/access to entire house 215-863-1235 6255 Limekiln Pike $125/week Room for rent. 215-549-2111

A1 Nice, well maintained rms, N. & W. Phila. Starting @ $125/wk 610.667.9675

102 Manheim small & lrg 1Br units $575-$700. great transp 610-287-9857

16xx Church St. 5BR/1.5BA bkyd,bsmt,porch,sec 8 ok 267.304.0803

11xx N. 55TH ST. BRAND NEW BUILDING Single rooms $400. Double rooms $600. Rooms w/ bath & kitchen $600. Rooms come fully furnished w/ full size beds, fridge, and dresser. SSI/SSD/VA & Public assistance ok. Also SW, W., N., S. Phila, Frankford & Lansdowne PA 267-707-6129 19xx Erie Ave, luxury rm, xtra clean, ideal for seniors, $90/wk SSI ok. 215-920-6394 1xx N Millick pvt home,use of Kit & ba No sec/last mo. $350/mo. 215-834-6473 Temple Area: Furn. Luxury Rooms. Free utils, cable, internet. Call 267-331-5382

560 SL 1986 $10,000 2 tops, 93K mi, new insp. (215)990-0729

930 TURBO 1988 $48,000 ONLY 26k miles, white w/ tan leather interior, suspension & motor upgrades, adult owned, all maintenance & upgrades done @ Vision Porsche. 570-573-9058

$250 & UP FOR JUNK CARS Call 215-722-2111

Junk Cars & Trucks Wanted, $400, Call 856-365-2021

21xx Scattergood St. 3BR Section 8 approved. Call 215-205-9910

JUNK CARS WANTED 24/7 REMOVAL. Call 267-377-3088

58xx Hadfield St. 4br/1ba $900 w/w crpt, Section 8 ok, 215-910-9549

87xx Glenloch 3 br/1.5 ba $1000+utils 2mo sec. W/D, gar, pkg, yd 215-888-3010

64th/Linberg vic. 3br $875+utils Exc cond. Sect 8 ok. Mike 215-901-3324

Bridesburg, newly renov 3br, full bsmt, gar, porch, sec dep req 215-432-5637

6737 Dorel St. 3BR/1BA $875+ utils. Call Erik 215.744.5750 or 215.510.0034 71xx Pascal Ave 5BR house $1250+utils modern, Sec. 8 approved. 215-726-8817

Frankford, nice rm in apt, near bus & El, $250 sec, $85/wk & up. 215-526-1455

2Br, 3Br & 4Br Houses Sec. 8 welcome beautifully renovated, (267)981-2718

Germantown Area: NICE, Cozy Rooms Private entry, no drugs (267)988-5890

54xx Thomas (off Baltimore Ave) 3br $800+utils. Newly Renov., Great Area, "The Landlord That Cares" Tasha 267.584.5964, Mark 610.764.9739

Germantown fully furn, newly built rms use of house, laundry. 267-600-1584

Germantown, furn., good loc. clean, quiet reasonable, call 12-8p. 215-849-8994

MANTUA & 40th/Fairmount: Large rooms, newly renovated kitchen & bath, starting @ $100/wk SSI ok (215)941-0481

55xx Walton 3br $750 nice block, hardwood floors, completely renov., gorgeous, Sec. 8 ok 267-249-6645

707 N. 42nd St. 6 BR/2 BA open Saturday, sect. 8 ok, (718)679-7753 Cobbs Creek 1BR & 2BR $625-$700 newly renovated duplex. (610)348-6121

MT. AIRY (Best Area) $125/week. cable, Furnished. SSI ok. 215-730-8956 NE $130/wk. all utils incld. Large, furn, 1st wk free. Call 267-600-2887

N PHILA. $150/week Lrg rm. w/priv kit/bath w/d. 267-992-2063 N. Phila, 18xx W. Berks St., Furn Rooms, privte entry, $75/wk. 2 weeks rent ($150) + 2 weeks sec ($150) = $300 to move in. No cooking. Call John (215)236-8518

Olney & N. Phila. Furn rms cpt, nr trans, kit, coin W/D, $55+. Call 516-527-0186

SW Phila rm for rent $250 move in, share kit & bth. also apt avail 267-251-2749 SW Philly move in special $300, utils incl, bath, $110-$125/wk. 484-598-3414 West and SW Phila $125-$140/wk priv rm & ba, clean & new. 215-939-5854

A1 PRICES FOR JUNK CARS FREE TOW ING , Call (215) 726-9053

MAYFAIR 3BR $1,150+ utils w/d, dishwasher incl., Call 215-421-9606 N.E. 851 E Sanger St. 3BR/1.5BA $900+ beaut. cond. New windows/bath/kitchen/ rugs & paint gar. Jimmy 215-920-8397

BMW F 800 ST 2008 $9500 6k mi., bags & extras, Bill (215)836-5854 245 Thia Court 3BR/2.5BA $1,425/mo www.postlets.com/rtpb/7508441 610-517-4269 Ask for James

Brookhaven 2BR/1.5BA $1300 Cambridge Square Twnhse 215.353.1919

Freightliner Century Class S/T â&#x20AC;&#x2122;04 $10k 911k miles, Detroit engine (856)393-8048

Darby 3br/1ba $950+utils prch,yd,close shop & transp 610.696.2022 Ridley Twp - Twin 3BR $1295 N ewly remodeled hardwood flrs, great schools wshr/dryer inlc. Avail. 7/1 610-563-5806

Upper Darby 3BR $950+utils Updated appliances, recently painted, close to transp., access to major highways, garage. Call 610-842-5996

To learn more or to find the right person for your job, visit your local partner at philly.com/monster

Willingboro 3Br/2Ba $1,500+utils Ranch, lrg family rm & yard 609.636.7989 18xx N 23rd 6br/2ba $1100 26xx Bouvier 3br/1ba $775 renovated, must see, 215-828-6293

2047 W. York St. 3BR/1.5BA $700 Temple students welcome. 267.934.8474 25xx Seltzer St 2 BR $625+ utils newly renov, new kitch/tile. 267-471-8171

56xx Crowson St. 3BR Newly renovated, nice and cozy, must see! Sec. 8 accepted. Call 267-331-9255

5950 N. Leithgow 3BR/1BA $850 liv rm., din. rm., kitchen. (215)767-7637 Lawncrest: 5xx Anchor St. 3Br/1Ba Section 8 ok. Call 215-407-2559

45xx N Mole St 3BR/1BA $775+ utils very nice, very clean, wont last, section 8 ok, Call now (215)651-7435

West Phila - Room for rent, $90-$125 /wk. Call 215-921-1490 ask for Hakim W. Phila $125 new renov, nice neighbrd 267-258-8727 or 267-847-6104

4x W. Rockland St. 5Br $1325+utils Section 8 approved. Call 917-863-8624

W Phila & G-town: newly ren lg, lux rms /apts. ALL utils incl, SSI ok, 215-833-4065

55xx Ardleigh 3BR/1BA Modern Kitch. New Carpets. 215-514-7143

low cost cars & trucks Buick Lesabre 1997 $3,300 79k, mint, inspec., 610-667-4829

Ford Crown Victoria LTD 1987 $1,000 Must sell. Loaded. Call 856-869-2569

Cadillac 2001 Sedan Deville $4,975 New body style, Luxury 4 door, a/c, full pwr, S/S whls, orig mi, woman driver. Opportunity of a lifetime. Carol 215-922-5342

Ford Focus 2003 $4,500 firm 2 door, loaded, 80k miles, garage kept, excellent cond, 2nd owner (215)370-1197 FORD WINDSTAR 2003 $2,000/OBO Running cond., 131K miles. 215-760-0425 Honda Civic LX 1996 $2,500 115k, auto, 4 dr, insp, exc cd215.900.6299 Honda Metropolitan CFN50 mopad 2003 only200mi,gas saver $1250 215.764.0469 Hyundai Elantra GLS 2000 $1,750 4 door, auto, loaded, clean, 215-280-4825

Cadillac Deville 1997 $3350 Garage kept, like new, 610-388-7993

Chevrolet Impala 2003 $3995/neg. 126k mi, clean. exc cond., 267-973-1961 CHRYSLER Voyager 2002 $2650/obo runs exc, fully loaded. 267-650-2548 DODGE NEON SE 2003 $3,195 4 cylinder, auto. Call 215-677-6135 Ford 2000 Luxury Conv Van (new body style) a/c, full pwr, orig mi, running boards, prem tires, mag whls, like new quick private sale, $3,985. 215-928-9632

SUBARU OUTBACK LIMITED 1998 $3,900 Station wagon, 5 speed, 49,000 original miles, runs like new. Call 267-844-1223 Volvo C 70 Turbo coupe 1999 $3950 moonroof, 17 in alloys, lthr, 267.592.0448 WINNEBAGO 1977 $3,250 77k, good condition. 610-667-4829

507 E. Walnut Lane 1br Efficiency $575 Newly renovated, Call (215)760-0206

16XX S Conestoga, 3br hse, refrig, new paint/crpt yd pch $775+ 267-645-9421

1xx S. 59th St. 3br/1ba $850+utils renovated, w/d included, 610-626-0071

N Phila Furn, Priv Ent $75 & up . No drugs, SSI ok. available now 215.763.5565 Pottstown 2BR/ 1BA $750 new cpt,W/D in unit,Caitlan 917.406.2868

32xx N Philip 3br/1ba $690+utils wall/wall carpets, porch. 215-836-1960

50XX Jackson, lge 3br hse, refrig, new paint/crpt yd bsmt $865+ 267-645-9421

Darby area. N/S, $500/mo, furn., cable & utils incl, use of house 484-469-0753

North Philly clean, quiet bldng, proof of income, $125/wk. Call 267-702-7914 WARMINSTER Lg 1-2-3 BR Sect. 8 OK 1 MONTHS FREE RENT!!! HURRY!! Pets & smoking ok. We work with credit problems. Call for Details: 215-443-9500

34XX Braddock lge 3br hse, refrig, new paint/crpt yd bsmt $675+ 267-645-9421

DISCOVERY SE 2003 4 door w/2 sunroofs, all extras, orig mi, meticulous owner, sac. below KBB $5950 215-627-1814

1854 S. 65th St. 3br/1ba $785+ utils Call Erik 215.744.5750 or 215.510.0034

LaSalle Univ area $125/week Renov furn rooms 215-843-4481 Grant & Academy 2br/1ba $750+utils 2nd flr, w/d, off st. prkg (267)688-5252 Grant & Bustleton 2br Condo $925 prvt balcony w/garden view 215.943.0370 Verree Road/Red Lion Vic. 1BR Duplex $650+utils. 3 mo req. 215-808-8863

66xx Bouiver 3BR $1,000 63xx Norwood 3BR $900 newly renov., Sec 8 OK. 215-324-7514

21xx Manton St 3br/1ba $825+utils newly remod., hwd flrs, new kit w/granite countertops, new bathroom (215)917.1091

53xx Girard Ave: Large clean rooms $100-$110/week. Call (215)917-1091

SW Phila. furnished, with cable & HBO. $110-$130/wk. Call KB (347)316-4094

Broad & Hunting Park 2br $675+utils 3rd flr, nwly renovated, (215)559-5039

19xx S. Norwood St. 2/3BR modern kitchen & bath, just remodeled, section 8 ok, Call 215-432-3040

Broad & Olney deluxe furn room priv ent $145/wk. Sec $200. 215-572-8833

1x Broad St. & Windrim 1br apt Must see! Sec. 8 ok. 215-885-1700 48xx Carlisle 1br/1ba $575+utils beautiful, new renov,lrg bkyd, front porch, avail immed. $1725 mvn. 267-591-0021

22nd & Venango we have what you want! All size rooms. Call (267)414-4819

Germantown 4br $1100 laundry room, central air, 267-292-5849

128i 2011 automatic, 15K miles. Excellent condition. Loaded! Grey/Black. 302-530-7168

P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R | J U N E 1 4 - J U N E 2 0 , 2 0 1 2 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T |

Broad & Erie Ave. 2BR $315 every 2 weeks. $995 move in. Near transportation & shops. Call 215-498-9149 Strawberry Mansion 1BR $575/mo. 3rd flr, LR, kitch & ba. Call (215)765-4429

1 BR & 2 BR Apts $725-$835 spacious, great loc., upgraded, heat incl, PHA vouchers accepted 215-966-9371 E. Logan St. 1BR/2BR $600-750/mo Incl heat, near transp. Call 267-228-6601. Germantown & Walnut 2Br $650 Call 267-902-2585

Chew & Chelton 4BR $950+ gas, elec. water, sec. 8 ok. 215-633-0830

classifieds

1X N. FARSON ST, studio apt . Refrig, new paint/carpet, $425+. 267-645-9421 1xx 56th & Spruce 3BR Must see! Sec. 8 ok. 215-885-1700 40th & Cambridge 2br $645/mo. free utils, Call or text Scott 215-222-2435 52xx Walnut St 1BR $540/mo. 1 mo. sec. + 1st mo. rent. (610) 505-1637 56th & Haverford 1BR $550 Utils not included. Call 215-651-7777

22nd & Tioga; 19th & Venango, Priv. ent, fresh paint, use of kit, w/w, grt loc! $110/wk $270/move in 267-997-5212

26xx Parrish 3BR/2.5BA $1,900+utils Townhouse, garage, rear yard, C/A, W/D, near transportation. Call 267-939-4959

automotive 325 E. Cliveden St. 3br/1ba $1200+util Call Erik 215.744.5750 or 215.510.0034

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