Philadelphia City Paper, June 12th, 2014

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Publisher Nancy Stuski Editor in Chief Lillian Swanson Senior Editor Patrick Rapa Arts & Culture Editor Mikala Jamison Digital Media Editor/Movies Editor Paulina Reso Food Editor Caroline Russock Senior Staff Writers Daniel Denvir, Emily Guendelsberger Staff Writer Ryan Briggs Copy Chief Carolyn Wyman Associate Web Producer Carly Szkaradnik Contributors Sam Adams, Dotun Akintoye, A.D. Amorosi, Rodney Anonymous, Mary Armstrong, Meg Augustin, Bryan Bierman, Shaun Brady, Peter Burwasser, Mark Cofta, Alison Dell, Adam Erace, David Anthony Fox, Caitlin Goodman, K. Ross Hoffman, Deni Kasrel, Alli Katz, Gary M. Kramer, Drew Lazor, Gair “Dev 79� Marking, Robert McCormick, Andrew Milner, Annette Monnier, John Morrison, Michael Pelusi, Sameer Rao, Elliott Sharp, Marc Snitzer, Tom Tomorrow, John Vettese, Nikki Volpicelli, Brian Wilensky Editorial Interns Maggie Grabmeier, Jim Saska, Diane Bayeux, Katie Krzaczek, Indie Jimenez Production Director Michael Polimeno Editorial Art Director Allie Rossignol Advertising Art Director Evan M. Lopez Senior Editorial Designer Brenna Adams Editorial Designer Jenni Betz Staff Photographer Neal Santos Contributing Photographers Jessica Kourkounis, Mark Stehle Contributing Illustrators Ryan Casey, Don Haring Jr., Joel Kimmel, Cameron K. Lewis, Thomas Pitilli, Matthew Smith Human Resources Ron Scully (ext. 210) Circulation Director Mark Burkert (ext. 239) Sales & Marketing Manager Katherine Siravo (ext. 251) Account Managers Colette Alexandre (ext. 250), Nick Cavanaugh (ext. 260), Amanda Gambier (ext. 228), Thomas Geonnotti (ext. 258), Sharon MacWilliams (ext. 262) Office Coordinator/Adult Advertising Sales Alexis Pierce (ext. 234) Founder & Editor Emeritus Bruce Schimmel 22

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New train time, p. 13

Naked City....................................................................................7 A&E................................................................................................18 22

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Food...............................................................................................28 cover photograph by neal santos design by allie rossignol

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city

CP’s Quality-o-Life-o-Meter

[ - 2]

andyman Anthony Flora, who worked on H the set of MTV show Snooki & JWoww, is suing Harrah’s casino in Atlantic City after security guards allegedly beat him unconscious. Society is prepared to call it even.

[ - 3]

F lora is the sixth person to file a suit against Harrah’s alleging that its security personnel attacked without provocation. “We are simply following protocol,” says the head of security, an angry bee. 22

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[ + 5] Councilman Jim Kenney’s proposed mari-

juana bill would make possession of pot punishable by a $25 fine payable by mail. And due whenever.

[ - 4]

A North Philly woman says a neighbor’s row house containing buckets of human feces is causing her and her family respiratory issues. “Well, I find it refreshing,” says the landlord, a fly.

[ - 3]

onprofit public-interest news site Axis­ N Philly to shut down Saturday after a two-year run. Public’s non-interest in news is cited.

[ 0]

S everal local news outlets report that three men stole hoagies from a Wawa in Logan Circle. Nice work, guys. Maybe we don’t need AxisPhilly after all.

[ - 2]

P ennDOT’s $211.7 million project to wid­en I-95 begins its second phase, and is expected to cause traffic delays near Fish­town and Port Richmond. So there’s another reason.

[ + 1] Philly chef Jennifer Carroll, who competed on Bravo’s Top Chef in 2009, will compete in a spinoff called Top Chef Duels. Basically they walk 10 paces, shoot and the winner cooks and serves the loser over risotto with a balsamic reduction.

[ - 2]

A wife attacks her estranged husband’s girlfriend after tracking the pair via GPS to a Wawa in New Jersey. Which in New Jersey is a misdemeanor punishable by a $25 fine payable by mail.

This week’s total: -10 | Last week’s total: -6

DEMO JOB: L&I says it hasn’t been paid for the costly demolition of St. Boniface Cathedral at Norris Square that made way for a nonprofit group’s affordablehousing project. neal santos

[ demolition ]

on the house Does the city raid L&I’s demolition budget for economic-development projects? By Ryan Briggs

O

ne year after the botched demo job that led to the Market Street building collapse, the city wants the public to believe it has made significant improvements to the Department of Licenses and Inspections, the city agency charged with safeguarding the public from crumbling buildings. Along with new regulations that theoretically tighten construction-site inspections, the city has boosted L&I’s emergency-demo­lition budget by half, to $9 million. This perpetually scarce money is used to preemptively tear down dangerous structures before they col­lapse on their own. But little attention has been paid to how L&I has spent this money — or been ordered to spend this money — in the past. According to records obtained from L&I, the agency has spent hun­ dreds of thousands of dollars supposedly reserved for emergen­cy demolitions to pay for the costs of tearing down buildings owned by various city-affiliated nonprofits. In some instances, L&I has been told to “eat” the costs of clearing away buildings in preparation for redevelopment projects, while in others, the agency has dem­olished properties that the nonprofits could not or would not maintain. Although L&I is supposed to bill property owners for demolition

costs, in practice, City Paper found these costs were rarely reimbursed by the nonprofits that benefited from the department’s work. One of the costliest such projects was the demolition of St. Boniface Cathedral, a brownstone temple that loomed over Norris Square in Kensington for nearly 140 years. But in 2006, with a dwindling congregation and an estimated $7 million bill for structural repairs, the Archdiocese elected to try to sell the building. It found an eager buyer in the Norris Square Civic Association (NSCA), a nonprofit hunting for land to build a multimillion dollar af­fordable housing and educational complex. The location was perfect, just yards away from NSCA’s head­quarters — the only problem was the crumbling church building. “[The church] had big brownstone blocks and they were coming out,” said NSCA Executive Direc­tor Patricia De Carlo. “Pieces of the stone were falling, and it was dangerous. … It would have killed you.” De Carlo and the board of directors closed on the property in 2007, before funding for the actual redevelopment project had been secured. The cathedral sat for years, surrounded by an apron of scaffolding and boards designed to catch falling pieces of debris, while NSCA put together nearly $5 million in state and federal grants to support the construction of seven units of affordable housing on the church site. “We did engineering reports that determined [the church] couldn’t be salvaged,” said De Carlo. Asked why L&I was brought

L&I rarely gets repaid by nonprofits.

>>> continued on page 8

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✚ On The House

[ the naked city ]

<<< continued from page 7

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in to execute the demolition, she said the story was “complicatedâ€? without providing further details. Complicated indeed. Records indicate NSCA didn’t plan to use any of the money the organization secured to tear down the church itself. In 2008, De Carlo cut a deal with then Director of Com­merce Andrew Altman to have the city pay dem­olition costs by agreeing to reduce the sale price of a massive NSCA property at Front and Berks streets that the school district wanted to use for the construction of a new high school in Kensington. “After the transfer of the property described above, the City will either directly or through a third party demolish the former Saint Boniface Church,â€? wrote Altman in a 2008 letter, obtained by City Paper, which also agreed to purchase the Front Street property from NSCA for $2.1 million. It was a dubious bargain for the city — De Carlo had originally asked for $3.9 million in exchange for the Front Street property, which NSCA had acquired seven years earlier for just $500,000. Nev­ ertheless, in 2011, L&I spent $482,000, or roughly one eleventh of its $5.5 million annual emergencydemolition budget, tearing down St. Boniface. Sources close to that deal say the understanding was that the demo costs would eventually be covered by money from the city’s general fund. But L&I Commissioner Carlton Williams says his dep­ artment “has not been paid to dateâ€? for those costs. According to L&I records, the emergency-demolition budget was also used in 2009 to demolish a fire-damaged building that the Latino socialservice agency Asocia­ciĂłn PuertorriqueĂąos en Marcha had owned since 1993. The agency did not respond to a request for comment, and the city was unable to confirm whether the cost of that demolition had been repaid as of press time. Members of the nonprofit community familiar with the practice of using L&I’s budget to cover costs defended the expenses in certain circumstan­ces, saying it made sense to provide an extra resource to organizations that are mainly funded by the city. But draining the fund for emergency demolitions can be problematic because the city is already unable to keep up with an ever-growing backlog of “imminently dangerousâ€? buildings, mostly held by private owners. L&I steps in, in most cases, to demolish dangerous buildings because the former owners are nowhere to be found. Few of these owners ever repay L&I for demolition costs — the agency has accrued over $16.5 million worth of unpaid bills for demolition over the last two years alone, according to the Revenue Department. Conversely, the not-for-profit entities mentioned in this story have well-established relationships with the city. In some instances, L&I has been forced to come to the rescue of nonprofits that got in over their heads assembling real estate. During the 2000s, the East Parkside Community Revitalization

Cor­poration (EPCRC), a West Philly based nonprofit, acquired at least 62 properties in one neighborhood. While some of these properties were eventually redeveloped, the city has demolished four buildings owned by EPCRC over the last two years alone, at a combined cost of $69,000. That group appears to have ceased operations sometime over the last three years, and the costs for the demolition of its properties have not been repaid. The city also spent over $11,400 to demolish a row home at 1417 North Frazier St. in West Phila­ delphia in 2013. The House of Umoja, a social services nonprofit run by Con­gressman Chaka Fattah’s mother, Falaka Fattah, had acquired that property in 1997 for an ambitious redevelopment project.

L&I has rescued nonprofits that got in over their heads. “The House of Umoja is trying to replicate one block of an ancient African city,â€? said Falaka Fattah. “The city DjennĂŠ was known for it’s beautiful architecture.â€? Fattah said her group had acquired 23 properties on the same block, but was unable to come up with money to either renovate or demolish any of those properties. “The reason the property had to be torn down was simply because we weren’t able to raise money fast enough to keep the city from tearing it down,â€? said Fattah. However, financial disclosure forms filed by Umoja in 2011, the most recent year available, showed the group recorded $4.5 million in revenues over a sixyear span, with real estate holdings totalling over $614,000. (ryan.briggs@citypaper.net)

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[ the naked city ]

[ taxes ]

A radical makeover A Realtor-tea party property tax revolt could mean drastic cuts in school funding. By Daniel Denvir

T

he Pennsylvania Association of Realtors and a tea partybacked coalition are mobilizing to support legislation that would abolish local school property taxes, a measure likely to result in the loss of billions of dollars in education funding at a time when districts across the state, including Philadelphia’s, face deep fiscal crises. But Chuck Liedike, campaign manager of the Realtor-backed group Real Reform 76, sees only upside to the legislation being considered in Harrisburg. He says the change would eliminate an onerous tax without harming public education. “It allows Pennsylvania homeowners to stay in their home, to be able to afford a home,” says Liedike. And “school districts would receive a dollar-for-dollar match in what they would have received in property-tax revenues.” But that does not seem probable: The Education Stabilization Fund, a new entity that would be created under the law, would likely provide far less school funding than the current property tax-based system, according to an October 2013 report from the General Assembly’s Independent Fiscal Office. That shortfall would reach $900 million in the law’s second year, and a staggering $2.5 billion in its fifth. David Baldinger, the Berks County activist who heads the Pennsylvania Taxpayers Cyber Coalition, told the conservative news website PA Independent that the proposed legislation was “designed to slow the growth of education funding,” and says that school spending on new buildings, excessive compensation and skyrocketing pension liabilities are out of control. The legislation’s opponents are “saying ‘we’ll underfund education,’” Baldinger tells City Paper. “There’s a point to that if you assume that education should continue to be funded at its current rate. That is not sustainable.” Sharon Ward, executive director of the liberal and labor-backed Pennsylvania Budget and Policy Center and an opponent of the proposed legislation, puts it differently. “While the rhetoric is about property taxes, it is really more about the war on schools,” she says. “It takes away the bulk of the authority of local school districts to fund their schools, and imposes a very stringent cap.” The legislation would radically remake Pennsylvania’s public finances by eliminating the local school property taxes that provide significant funding to school districts and substitute revenues generated by increases in personal-income and state sales taxes — less stable sources of revenue. The sales tax would also be expanded to cover many items currently exempted, and school districts could levy an earned-income tax and net-profit tax, or personal-income tax, by voter referendum. Senate Bill 76 now counts a majority of senators as co-sponsors, sufficient votes to pass. Its companion legislation, House Bill 76, is approaching a majority in the House. Liedike says that Gov. Tom Corbett, who did not respond to requests for comment, has told advocates that he would sign the bill if it comes to his desk. The bill has little support in Philadelphia, and few local legislators have signed on as co-sponsors. Rep. Rosita Youngblood’s office says that her name was accidentally added as a co-sponsor 10 | P h i l a d e l p h i a C i t y Pa p e r |

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SIGN OF PROTEST: Legislation to eliminate local school property taxes is gaining steam in Harrisburg. COURTESY OF Jan Murphy/Pennlive

and it has been removed. Mayor Michael Nutter “strongly opposes this bill,” according to an e-mail from spokesperson Mark McDonald. “SB 76 would force the city into looking at increasing wage and business taxes, precisely what we don’t need. And, it would not end up killing off the property tax in Philadelphia, only the school-related portion of that tax. … We would also end up having to look at raising the sales tax, which would make the city even more uncompetitive with surrounding jurisdictions.” The measure would also likely provide Philadelphians with more limited tax relief than most other districts. While most districts fund their schools primarily through local property taxes (in addition to state and federal funds and, in many cases, earned-income taxes), Philadelphia revenue sources for schools include use-and-occupancy, liquor-sales and net-income taxes and Parking Authority money. If this legislation became law, Philadelphians would continue to pay those additional local school taxes. As a result, the Greater Phil­adelphia Association of Realtors (GPAR) has broken ranks with its colleagues across the state. “This is a devastating blow to Philadelphia if this gets passed because we’re going to be underfunded $400 to $500 million,” says GPAR president Allan Domb. “If other municipalities get reimbursed for 100 percent of their school costs, then why shouldn’t Philadelphia?” Domb says the legislation would also hurt renters because landlords will not pass on savings from the property-tax elimination to tenants, who would still pay the higher sales and income taxes. He also says that big businesses with fixed triple-net-leasing agreements would reap a windfall since those tenants are responsible for paying real-estate taxes on top of rent.

The shortfall would reach $900 million in the law’s second year, and a staggering $2.5 billion in its fifth.

➤ For many tea party members, property taxes undercut the

right to private property.

“What we see happening and contributing to the decline of the cities, the abandoned properties, properties that aren’t maintained … [is] an inability to pay the property tax,” says Lebanon 9-12 Project Chair Jim Rodkey. “Government was instituted with the sole purpose of the protection of property. We’re not doing that. Through the property tax, we’re destroying property.” Eighty-four tea party, Glenn Beckinspired 9-12 organizations and taxpayer groups of unclear political affiliation are listed as members of Baldinger’s Pennsylvania Taxpayers Cyber Coalition, which he says worked with state Rep. Jim Cox to draft the legislation. The Berks County Republican did not respond to requests for comment. “We span the entire political spectrum, but we’ve managed to come together on this single issue,” says Baldinger. “We essentially wrote the bill.” The Realtors have lent a long-running, grassroots anti-tax movement the support of a potent and well-financed political giant. Ward calls it an “unholy alliance.” “This was one of those ideas that people thought was so far-fetched it didn’t deserve really much attention,” says Ward. “They’ve lent a degree of credibility and also some big money to the idea.” But Education Policy and Leadership Center President Ron Cowell questions whether legislators are eager to pass a tax cut that also includes major hikes to other taxes. Notably, the Pennsylvania Chamber of Business and Industry opposes the legislation and the Commonwealth Foundation, the state’s principal conservative think tank, has not taken a position. “It’s one thing to talk about. It’s another thing to cast those votes,” says Cowell. Franklin & Marshall political scientist Terry Madonna says that he’s “still not convinced it gets done. Maybe that’s 30 years of cynicism on the issue.” But “getting rid of the property tax is very popular — it polls as the most-hated tax. Obviously, if it should pass, the Realtors will gain immensely in selling homes.” The two sides of this debate do share some points of agreement. Tea party leader Rodkey says that he does not think that Philadelphia schools receive sufficient funding, and Ward suggests that the state >>> continued on adjacent page

[ the naked city ]

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✚ A Radical Makeover <<< continued from previous page

“We span the entire political spectrum, but we’ve ... come together on this single issue.� explore measures to provide targeted relief to help cash-strapped homeowners, especially in areas like the Poconos that struggle with high property taxes. Ward says that increasing state spending on public education, which has been slashed under Gov. Corbett, would provide critical relief. Pennsylvania schools receive 36 percent of their funding from the state, according to the most recent census data from 2012. The figure is significantly below the national rate of 46 percent. Progressive blogger and City Paper contributor Jon Geeting says that shifting the entirety of education funding to the state would be a more equitable move since property-tax-based funding fuels the continued inequity among school districts: Those with wealthy tax bases like Lower Merion get more money while poorer ones like Philadelphia get less. “It would make the disparities more apparent, inviting a further round of agitation for reform,� says Geeting, who does not support the proposed legislation since it does not include sufficient revenue. “If the state is in charge of distributing the money, we can have that fight. If the money is mostly segregated into 500 different tax bases and unavailable for redistribution across districts, we can’t.� Ward says she agrees “that local property-tax payers are paying too much and the state is paying too little. If we fix the state funding problem, it will really help the local property-tax problem.� Domb sees the legislation as just the latest example of the state shortchanging Philadelphia and ignoring the role this region plays as the state’s most powerful economic engine. “We’d be better off being our own state than part of Pennsylvania,� he says. (daniel.denvir@citypaper.net)

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11

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15

a&e

artsmusicmoviesmayhem

curtaincall By Mark Cofta

K at h r y n R ai n e s

Culture clash

➤ Well-meaning Jason (David Bardeen)

and Brendan (Jered McLenigan) buy good karma by sponsoring a child in a distant impoverished country. “We give,” quips Brendan, “without the hassle of receiving.” What if the kid suddenly shows up? Ritu Comes Home, a new comedy by Peter Gil-Sheridan commissioned by InterAct Theatre Company, imagines just that. For their 80 cents a day, the Lower Merion couple — settled in Roman Tatarowicz’s handsomely pristine living room set — receive updates from Bangladeshi teenager Ritu (Rebecca Khalil). “Does it mention rice?” jokes friend Yesenia about Ritu’s latest letter during their regular Friday night drinking party. Profane and politically incorrect, the trio dish about their $10,000 rug and their lost dog FluffyTuffy’s $200-a-month antidepressant bill. Then Ritu magically appears, and the expected crushing collision with poverty’s stark conditions instead builds the comedy. The boys’ first concern is that they’ll have to cancel their Puerto Rican vacation. Though they can’t understand Ritu, we hear her in English; we soon learn that she’s as moody, rebellious and shallowly obsessed with American fashion as any teen. When Jason magically disappears, kept man Brendan and “retired actress” and lost soul Yesenia face raising Ritu alone, and serious issues emerge while they play house. Can Brendan and Yesenia be straight partners? Can they provide for Ritu without Jason’s lucrative job and persnickety control? Akash (Amar Srivastava), Ritu’s Bangladeshi fiancé, shows up, and assumptions are exploded in surprising ways. More magic — the play’s daring unexplained twist, which fits Gil-Sheridan’s extreme characters — results in a satisfying conclusion. (mark.cofta@citypaper.net) ✚ Ritu Comes Home, $22-$38, through June 22, InterAct

Theatre Company at the Adrienne, 2030 Sansom St., 215-568-8079, interacttheatre.org. 18 | P h i l a d e l p h i a C i t y Pa p e r |

stars of stripes: Polly Apfelbaum’s ode to Gene Davis’ Franklin’s Footpath covers the walls and floor of Temple Contemporary as part of the exhibit “Polly Apfelbaum + Dan Cole: For the Love of Gene Davis.” Sam Fritch

[ art exhibit ]

RAINBOW CONNECTION Two artists team up to honor a titan of tint. By Annette Monnier

G

ene Davis was an American painter of the Color Field variety known for his paintings of brightly hued vertical stripes. In 1972, Davis created Franklin’s Footpath — at the time the world’s largest artwork — by painting 414-foot-long colorful stripes down the Benjamin Franklin Parkway in front of the Philadelphia Museum of Art. The painting utilized 12 miles of masking tape, 400 gallons of special paint and a lot of stooping over with a paint roller. That painting is gone now, a parking lot in its place. But pieces of asphalt from the demolished work, along with an homage to its glory, are on view at Temple Contemporary. The tri­bute comes in the form of two installations by artists Polly Apfel­baum and Dan Cole, who were brought together though the “Distinguished Alumni Mentoring Program” at Tyler School of Art, Apfelbaum being the distinguished and Cole the up-and-coming artist. Apfelbaum’s installation encompasses the main gallery space in vertical and horizontal stripes that mimic Davis’ original painting. The painted stripes cover the walls; the floor is covered by four large wool carpets. (Visitors are required to take their shoes off.) The combination inspires some of the same awe that must have overcome the public when viewing Davis’ freshly rainbow-ed streetscape.

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The piece could stand on its own, without the invocation of the earlier work, with the exception of the footsteps of the original artist, along with demarcation for a five-gallon paint bucket, paint tray and roller woven into one of the carpets, all calling back to Davis. It’s fun to compare photographs of Franklin’s Footpath, noticing just how gnarly the asphalt streets were below the painted lines. The work con­jures thoughts of history, the ghost of artworks past and the ephemeral nature of things that seem permanent. In the smaller space to the left of Apfelbaum’s chromatic behemoth is the work of recent Tyler graduate Dan Cole. Cole’s contribution is a combination of wall painting and video projection, inter­mingling a slow-moving Davis pushing his paint roller on the Parkway with a clip from the cemetery scene in the classic film Harold and Maude. It is a collage that leads one to draw many colorful conclusions. It’s difficult to judge the successes and failures of an exhibition that grew from a mentoring program. On one hand, it seems that Cole enjoyed working with Apfelbaum, but the younger artist created work that appears to be forced on a theme while the older was able to create one in line with the rest of her oeuvre. Regardless, the result is well worth seeing. (annette.monnier@citypaper.net)

Conjuring the ghost of artworks past.

✚ Polly Apfelbaum + Dan Cole: For the Love of Gene Davis, through July 11,

Tyler School of Art, 2001 N. 13th St., 215-777-9021, tyler.temple.edu/templecontemporary.

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[ listen up all future crushes ] 19102review

[ album reviews ]

➤ bis | A-

➤ tigers jaw | B+

If data Panik, etcetera (Do Yourself In), the surprise fourth album from Scotland’s most adorable revolutionaries, had appeared a decade ago, following the electro-pop left turn/dead end of 2001’s Return to Central, its jittery angularity, neo-new wave bounce and gummy punk-funk grooves might have been, for once, right in step with a zeitgeist that they had unwittingly prefigured. Instead, the ’90s cult heroes’ signature candy-coated agit-pop feels as gloriously iconoclastic as ever, and this unexpected return delivers a hook—K. Ross Hoffman stuffed, sugary shock to the system.

Before three-fifths of Tigers Jaw left the band last year, they finished Charmer (Run For Cover), a record that takes the Scrantonians’ keyboard purrs, rhythmsavvy guitar work and sense of dirt-kicking, lovesick frustration to a logical conclusion. Brianna Collins and Ben Walsh don’t touch on anything too fresh here; if they keep writing midtempo slow burners like “Teen Rocket,” at least I won’t run out of tracks for mix CDs for any and all future crushes. —Marc Snitzer

➤ fucked up | A Fucked Up abandons the meta-narrative of David Comes to Life and looks inward with Glass Boys (Matador). Damian Abraham’s near-inhuman snarl — accompanied by the band’s increasingly arty take on hardcore — is at its most confrontational when he’s directing it at himself. Am I an echo or a whimper? Glass or stone? Would my 15-year-old self be disgusted by me now? If this record feels like the on-ramp to a midlife crisis, it’s one that’s just as triumphant as it is horrified. —Marc Snitzer

flickpick

FIGHT OR FLIGHT

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➤ ela stiles | B+ Whether or not you consider the spellbinding 17 minutes of this Sydney singer’s self-titled, purely a cappella debut (Bedroom Suck) to be an album, there’s no question it’s something special: soothing and haunting, ancient and alien. These seven songs — varying in length from 20 seconds to 10 minutes-plus — present Stiles as a Celtic Julianna Barwick, weaving together tendrils of ambient drone, devotional —K. Ross Hoffman music and creaky old British Isles folk.

[ movie review ]

we are the best! [ B+ ] Punk rock is often defined by what it rails against, and there’s a bit of that

in Luk­as Moodysson’s We Are the Best! But more important to this gleeful coming-ofage tale is what punk can stand for: namely community rooted in an unruly individual­ ity. Seventh graders Bobo (Mira Barkhammar) and Klara (Mira Grosin) come from rel­atively happy homes in 1982 Stockholm, so, on the surface, they don’t seem to have much to rebel against. Teenage ennui always finds an enemy, though, whether it’s starving children in Africa, nuclear war or gym class. The girls decide to take aim at those sub­ jects by forming their own punk band, never mind that neither of them has ever touched an instrument and that everyone around them insists punk is dead. These girls are true believers, however, and begin bashing away at bass and drums at a local rec center, liberally applying the punk philo­sophy that attitude takes precedent over talent. They import a touch of the latter when they recruit Hed­ vig (Liv LeMoyne), a friendless Christian girl who plays classical guitar. She teaches them a few bas­ic chords and soon they’re relentlessly rehearsing a song (“Hate the Sport”) that turns their phy­sical awkwardness into a virtue. Together, the girls get drunk, hone their band’s compe­ tence, crush on the boys in a neighboring punk band and roll their eyes at everyone who isn’t them. Moodysson joyously captures the tedium and aimless frus­trations of the teenage years, and spotlights the bonds forged by subcultures, no mat­ter how passé. More importantly, the film shows the solidity of friendship, even when challenged by petty jealousies and disagreements. Each of them outcasts on their own, the girls find an increased confidence in their camaraderie until they’re able to able to defiantly shout the titular declaration in the face of all evidence to the contrary. —Shaun Brady

These girls are true believers.

SMELLS LIKE TEEN SPIRIT: Klara (Mira Grosin) starts a punk band with two other Swedish middle schoolers.

The review of Philadelphia books

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➤ We can’t escape our pasts — this is some-

thing we all know, or at least should know, even in moments of flight. In Jessica Hendry Nelson’s debut memoir If Only You People Could Follow Directions, she accepts fleeing as a way of processing and nurturing, as “a moment’s par­don from all that has passed and all that is to come.” Nelson’s story of family and addiction begins in Philadelphia. The intertwined essays are a rove through her most intimate relationships. Her family, nuclear and chosen, is a mix of strong women and addicted men: a father who loses his battle with alcoholism, a brother who drifts in out and out of rehab and a best friend who is always stealing prescriptions and disappearing. Running after them are Nelson, her mother and her grandmother, who all persist, albeit wearily, to help these men who struggle to help themselves. Nelson takes us through the streets of Philadelphia — Woody’s, West Philly, the suburbs — to New Hampshire for college, New York City where she escapes and fails, Scotland and ultimately Vermont where she stays and heals. There is a struggle to find balance, love and new beginnings amidst all she’s been through and all that lingers. Nelson’s voice is assertive and meaningful, with moments of wry wit and despair. She layers her experiences so aptly — a blackface ewe that has fallen to its death juxtaposed with her father falling down a staircase to his own demise — and her refreshing style makes the essays meld together with grace and fluidity. At the crux is unconditional love for both family and self, and underneath that, the tenacious will to prevail. —Cynthia Ann Schemmer

✚ If Only You People Could Follow Directions

Jessica Hendry Nelson (Counterpoint Press, 2013, 256

pp.)

✚ If you know of any really good books to review please

email mikala@citypaper.net.

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INVITES YOU TO AN ADVANCE SCREENING OF MONDAY, JUNE 16TH, 7:30PM Prince Music Theater

Log on to www.citypaper.net/win for entry details ONE GRAND PRIZE WINNER WILL RECEIVE A JERSEY BOYS PRIZE PACK WHICH INCLUDES Branded headphones, movie soundtrack, bag, t-shirt, and poster

Gather a group now for this spectacular musical For Group Sales, please visit: http://wbgroups.com This film has been rated R for language throughout. Please note: Passes are limited and will be distributed on a first come, first served basis while supplies last. No phone calls, please. Limit one pass per person. Each pass admits two. Seating is not guaranteed. Arrive early. Theater is not responsible for overbooking. This screening will be monitored for unauthorized recording. By attending, you agree not to bring any audio or video recording device into the theater (audio recording devices for credentialed press excepted) and consent to a physical search of your belongings and person. Any attempted use of recording devices will result in immediate removal from the theater, forfeiture, and may subject you to criminal and civil liability. Please allow additional time for heightened security. You can assist us by leaving all nonessential bags at home or in your vehicle.

IN THEATERS JUNE 20TH jerseyboysmovie.com

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movie

shorts

Films are graded by City Paper critics a-f.

Supermensch: The Legend of Shep Gordon

: new

supermensch: The legend of shep gordon Read Drew Lazor’s review at citypaper.net/movies. (Ritz Five)

the grand seduction | cOnce a thriving fishing harbor, the tiny Newfoundland village of Tickle Head is now a virtual ghost town, its residents almost all living on welfare or packing up to find work inland. The town’s last chance at resuscitation arrives with the possibility of luring a new petroleum plant and its resulting jobs, which necessitates attracting a doctor for insurance purposes. A remake of the 2003 QuĂŠbĂŠcois film Seducing Dr. Lewis, The Grand Seduction is a toothless and eager-to-please comedy content to shuffle by on the likability of its cast. That burden is shouldered almost entirely by Brendan Gleeson as a lifelong resident who inherits the mayor’s office and masterminds an elaborate deception to convince a big-city doctor to call the village home. As the doc, Taylor Kitsch only slightly relaxes his usual wooden blankness in the quaint setting, and everyone else comes from a pool of stock small-town eccentrics. The lazy humor arises from the “adorable old townsfolkâ€? trick bag employed by middlebrow trifles like Waking Ned Devine and The Full Monty, while the requisite romantic subplot is barely fleshed out enough to mention. Director Don McKellar — a contributor to more genuinely quirky fare like Highway 61 and Last Night — keeps the proceedings brisk and bland, but the film’s core conceit is trite and muddled. Gleeson constantly trumpets the value of an honest day’s work, but the town’s residents triumph by lowering themselves to beat their corporate “saviorsâ€? at their own dishonest game. —Shaun Brady (Ritz Five)

the signal Read Drew Lazor’s review at citypaper.net/movies. (Ritz East)

we are the best! | B+ See Shaun Brady’s review on p. 19. (Ritz at the Bourse)

: ContinuinG edge of tomorrow | b Screwing with how nerds tell time, even under the anything-goes auspices of science fiction, is a good way to enrage continuity freaks and confuse the hell out of everyone else. Luckily, director Doug Liman handles the big and little hands with the precision and flash of a blackjack dealer, ensuring Edge of Tomorrow concedes as little edge as possible. There are no star-power issues, either, with Tom Cruise making large-toothed Tom Cruise-y faces all over the place. But it’s the storytelling that’s ultimately responsible for the movie’s kiddish allure, combining the infinite-lives appeal of a shoot-’em-up video game with a military puzzle pandering to armchair strategists. Sometime in the non-specific future, Earth is colonized by hostile invaders known as “Mimics,� ghastly tentacled monsters that make landfall in Western Europe. A pretty-boy PR officer with no actual fighting experience, Maj. William Cage (Cruise) bristles when the supreme general (Brendan Gleeson) forces him onto the frontlines of a massive Normandy-like beach siege to “sell the invasion� to the public. Shanghai’d for resisting the order, he’s thrown into live combat by Kentucky-fried master sergeant (Bill Paxton)

COLUMBIA PICTURES AND METRO-GOLDWYN-MAYER PICTURES PRESENT IN ASSOCIATION WITH LSTAR CAPITAL AND MRC AN ORIGINAL FILM/CANNELL STUDIOS PRODUCTION IN ASSOCIATION WITH STORYVILLE/75 YEAR PLAN PRODUCTIONS A FILM BY PHIL LORD & CHRISTOPHER MILLER JONAH HILL CHANNING TATUM “22 JUMP STREET� PETER STORMARE AND ICE CUBE MUSIC SUPERVISION MUSIC EXECUTIVE BY KIER LEHMAN BY MARK MOTHERSBAUGH PRODUCERS STEPHENJ. CANNELL PHIL LORD CHRISTOPHER MILLER TANIA LANDAUSTORY BRIAN BELL REID CAROLIN BENSCREENPLAY WAISBREN BASED"21 JUMPON THESTREET"TELEVISCREATEDION SERIBYES PATRICK HASBURGH & STEPHENJ. CANNELL BY MICHAEL BACALL & JONAH HILL BY MICHAEL BACALL AND OREN UZIEL AND RODNEY ROTHMAN PRODUCED DIRECTED BY NEAL H. MORITZ JONAH HILL CHANNING TATUM BY PHIL LORD & CHRISTOPHER MILLER

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and promptly dies a bloody death. That’s not a spoiler: The second he perishes, the day inexplicably reboots to the very beginning of his service, giving him the opportunity to improve — and bolster the chances of unlikely war hero Rita Vrataski (Emily Blunt) uncovering, and destroying, the source of the Mimics’ power. —Drew Lazor (Wide release)

the fault in our stars | b Like raw onions, the TV show Parenthood or your mean aunt’s predilection for pinching your arm fat, The Fault in Our Stars is not just likely to make you cry — those tears are backed by science. Yet what separates the YA cancer romance from other weepfests is not the depth of the melancholic lows, but the personal, palpable highs ballasting the other side of the scale. Adapted from John Green’s bestseller by The Spectacular Now writer Scott Neustadter, it’s a heavy depression session the second it starts, but the lightness of the happier times will help reduce eye swelling. Smart, cynical Hazel (Shailene Woodley), strapped to an oxygen tank 24/7 ever since thyroid cancer spread to her lungs, is encouraged to attend a support group by her upbeat parents (Sam Trammell and Laura Dern). Here she meets Augustus (Ansel Elgort), a former athlete who lost his leg to osteosarcoma, and the pair embarks upon the borderline-obsessive brand of teenage love affair anyone who’s been a teenager is familiar with. Though the spectre of death darkens the relationship, Hazel and Gus work to make it a secondary concern throughout their courtship. When their characters are finally forced to spar with eventuality, Woodley and Elgort offer some of their strongest, saddest work. If it feels like they’re trying exceptionally hard to bandsaw your most fragile emotions, they are. Don’t feel bad for feeling worse — this is what they trained for. —DL (The Roxy)

ida | aStark and stone-faced, director Pawel Pawlikowski’s Ida reveals itself slowly. In its opening minutes it appears to be a near-silent Bressonian drama set in a Polish convent. But then the young, pretty novitiate known as Anna (Agata Trzebuchowska) is called before the mother superior, who encourages her to visit her only living relative before taking her vows. Thus Anna meets Wanda (Agata Kulesza), a former state prosecutor who informs her niece that her name is not Anna 22 | P h i l a d e l p h i a C i t y Pa p e r |

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but Ida, she’s Jewish, and her parents were killed during the Nazi occupation. The pair set off on a road trip to find their graves, providing Anna with her first exposure to the outside world, including “carnal thoughts,” anti-Semitism and John Coltrane. The Paris-based Pawlikowski, returning to his native country for the first time in his career, keeps the focus on the two women and the subtle ways in which their journey changes them. At first they’re bemused by one other; Wanda stifles laughter at her niece’s unsullied innocence, while Ida reacts to her aunt’s cynicism and provocations with the self-satisfaction of the genuinely faithful. These small gestures are indicative of the film’s tone, which faces unfathomable horror with subtle grace, making its conclusions all the more harrowingly resonant. —SB (Ritz Five)

the immigrant | b+ Although the Weinstein Company’s release plan is more reminiscent of clandestine border crossings than entering through Ellis Island, James Gray’s evocative period piece follows Marion Cotillard’s wayward Pole through the golden door and onto the mean streets of Manhattan. She quickly falls prey to Joaquin Phoenix’s mercurial wheelerdealer, who treats her like an object of affection one moment and a piece of property the next. Gray doesn’t spare the portentous symbolism (see the prostitute garbed as Lady Liberty for proof), but he’s working in an old-fashioned idiom that supports it. The film’s classicism can be stifling — it has a touch of the self-willed masterpiece about it — but it falls away when Jeremy Renner comes on the scene as a stage magician whose dedication to sleight of hand makes him paradoxically honest. The movie’s centerpiece, a pageant for quarantined deportees at Ellis Island, is a tragic encapsulation of the American Dream in all its chimerical promise, part aspiration, part lie ­— and one of the most thrilling sequences in recent memory. —Sam Adams (Ritz at the Bourse)

[ movie shorts ]

maker travels to the Mexican ruins of Chichen Itza to make his last movie in anticipation of the world ending. Fri., June 13, 7 p.m., $9.

philamoca 531 N. 12th St., 267-519-9651, philamoca.org. Pennsylvania Hardcore (2014, U.S., 85 min.): Billed as the final public screening of this doc about Pennsylvania’s hardcore scene. Thu., June 12, 8 p.m., $10.

The Play’s the Thing: Václav Havel ­— Art and Politics International House, 3701 Chestnut St., 215-387-5125, ihousephilly. org. The Uninvited Guest (1969, Czechoslovakia, 22 min.), Every Young Man (1966, Czechoslovakia, 83 min.): A short film about socialism, and an absurdist drama in two parts kick off this series about Václav Havel, the Czech playwright/dissident/politician. Sat., June 14, 7 p.m., free with R.S.V.P. The Mist (1966, Czechoslovakia, 28 min.), A Report on Party and Guests

(1968, Czechoslovakia, 71 min.): A glimpse of the experimentation that happened at Prague’s Theatre on the Balustrade, followed by a Czech New Wave film featuring preposterous party games. Mon., June 16, 7 p.m., free with R.S.V.P. The Heart Above the Castle (2007, Czech Republic, 48 min.), And the Beggar’s Opera Again (1996, Czech Republic, 60 min.): A behind-the-scenes view of the 2002 NATO Summit in Prague, and two juxtaposed productions of Havel’s titular play. Tue., June 17, 7 p.m., free with R.S.V.P. Joseph Kilian aka A Person to Be Supported (1963, Czechoslovakia, 38 min.), Who Is Václav Havel … (1977, Czechoslovakia, 11 min.): A man’s surreal search for an old friend, and a short propaganda film created to discredit Havel in the 1970s. Wed., June 18, 7 p.m., free with R.S.V.P.

✚ special screenings INTERNATIONAL HOUSE 3701 Chestnut St., 215-387-5125, ihousephilly.org. Lost Heroes (2013, Canada, 107 min.): A doc about the golden age of Canadian comics. Thu., June 12, 7 p.m., $9. La Última Película (2013, Canada/Denmark/ Mexico/Philippines, 88 min.): A film-

more

citypaper.net/events

events listings@citypaper.net | june 12 - June 18

[ let’s never give up on this bliss ]

YOU WANT BLOOD?: Sex, Drugs, Rock & Roll continues through June 21 at Plays & Players Theatre. Andrew Cowle

Events is our selective guide to what’s going on in the city this week. For comprehensive event listings, visit citypaper.net/events. IF YOU WANT TO BE LISTED: Submit information by email (listings@ citypaper.net) or enter it yourself at citypaper.net/submit-event with the following details: date, time, address of venue, telephone number and admission price. Incomplete submissions will not be considered, and listings information will not be accepted over the phone.

6.12

thursday [ theater ]

Sex, Drugs, Rock & Roll $15-$30 | Through June 21, Plays & Players Theatre, 1714 Delancey Place, 866-811-4111, playsandplayers.org. Plays & Players’ season concludes with a taste of the next: 2014-15’s theme is “One,” featuring five one-person shows. This Eric Bogosian 1991 hit starred the playwright in

an evening of solo pieces, all darkly and hilariously skewering modern culture. Nearly a quarter-century later, Bogosian’s characters — extreme, outrageous, unanimously assholes — seem as fresh and relevant as ever, alas. Director Allison Heishman wisely doesn’t update the 80-minute show, and even more wisely cast versatile, intense, indefatigable Eric Scotolati. He’s great at switching instantly from the aging British rocker fondly recalling his drug-addled glory while telling kiddies not to do drugs; to the beer-swilling complainer who thinks dog shit on his lawn signals the world’s end; to the arrogant captain of industry for whom love is just another deal; to the “normal” guy who tortures himself with dreams of wealth and revenge; to the fussy diner oblivious to his culpability in his encounter with an over-thankful beggar; to the lothario waxing eloquent

about his perfect cock. With the audience inches away on two sides, no props and simple costumes all in black, white, and gray, Scotolati stands alone, expertly bringing every slimy, skeevy, sublimely sardonic character to life. Fortunately, Quig’s Pub, adjacent to Plays & Players’ Skinner Studio, stands ready with the drink you’ll need afterward. —Mark Cofta

[ rock/pop/hip-hop ]

Drgn King $8 | Thu., June 12, 8 p.m., with Ancient Rivers, Mumblr and Walking Shapes, Kung Fu Necktie, 1250 N. Front St., 215-291-4919, kungfunecktie.com. In 2010, sorta punk/sorta folk singer-songwriter Dominic Angelella joined forces with hip-hop producer Ritz Reynolds and, wouldn’t you know it, they go together like PB and J. Named for a favorite Chinese place in South Philly, Drgn

King has gotten noticed for its quirky, danceable tunes. Though the band plays out a ton, they’ve been keeping us hungry for new material since the release of last year’s masterpiece Paragraph Nights. Supposedly, Drgn King recently added a few new members to the live band. And supposedly they’re writing tons of new material, and supposedly it’ll turn into a new album. Right now, if you wanna hear what Drgn King sounds like you gotta go to a show. So that settles it. —Maggie Grabmeier

[ theater ]

The Toughest Boy in Philadelphia $20 | June 12-29, Iron Age Theatre Company at Luna Theater, 620 S. Eighth St., 610-279-1013, ironagetheatre.org. Norristown’s venerable Iron Age Theatre Company is establishing a presence in

Center City with the world premiere of local playwright Andrea Kennedy Hart’s based-on-a-true-story tale, serendipitously aligned with Pennsylvania’s legalization of gay marriage. Florence Gray was, for nearly a decade in the 1920s, an Irish gang leader known as Whistling Jack McConnell and Handsome Jack — until a tragedy exposed her secret. At the time, transgender identification was considered a medical condition that required treatment. Hart’s play also explores issues of women’s rights, absentee parents and class struggle, which all influenced gender identity then, and still do today. Director John Doyle’s all-female cast includes K.O. DelMarcelle as the title character and Susan Giddings, Colleen Hughes, Gina Martino and Michelle Pauls in a variety of male, female and transgender roles. —Mark Cofta

[ galleries ]

Fifth Annual Photo Competition and Exhibition

Free | June 12-Aug. 30, Philadelphia Photo Arts Center, 1400 N. American St., 215-232-5678, philaphotoarts.org. This Fishtown photo gallery gives you front-row seats to what’s hip and happening in the contemporary photography world. Art professionals have pulled together the work of pho­tography up-and-comers, and serve it to the public in the Fifth Annual Contemporary Pho­tography Competition and Exhi­bition. Photo Arts Center exec­utive director/founder Sar­ ah Stolfa says that this year’s com­petition features more “straightforward” (figurative rath­er than abstract) photogra­ phy than in previous years, and she thinks that has a lot to do with the judges — namely art world superstars Bri­an Paul Clamp (director and owner of

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[ events ]

contemporary art gallery ClampArt in Chelsea) and Mary Ellen Mark (Phil­adelphia’s own beloved, award-winning contemporary photographer). From an open call of more than 350 artists, Stolfa and the judges selected 45 finalists; the winner will be announced at the show’s opening on June 12. —Maggie Grabmeier

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friday

[ theater ]

Of Oz

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$20 | Fri.-Sun., June 13-15, The Cabaret Administration at the Skybox at the Adrienne, 2030 Sansom St., 215-715-9757, cabaretadministration.com.

In most people’s minds, The Wizard of Oz is a film musical starring Judy Garland. But in director-writer-designer Anna Frangiosa’s playful imagination, L. Frank Baum’s classic story is whimsically and erotically reinterpreted. Her

C y lla V o n T ie d ma n n

burlesque theater company, The Cabaret Administration, which last fall probed another hugely influential novel in Free. Think. Love. Frankenstein., returns to explore lesser-known aspects of the Oz story, such as the Tin Man’s sad tale of unrequited

love and the truth about those fierce flying monkeys. With lavish costumes and glitzy dancing girls, Frangiosa (who performs under the name Annie A-Bomb) and choreographer Christine Fisler (who, as Lelu Lenore, plays Glinda the Good Witch) promise a

4"5

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FOR A CHANCE TO WIN SCREENING PASSES, LOG ONTO: WWW.CITYPAPER.NET/WIN

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show that rips away the story’s candy-coated treatment in popular culture — while also being visually stimulating and stunning, smart and satirical, and, of course, sexy and fun. —Mark Cofta

[ r&b/pop ]

CODY CHESNUTT $16-$26 | Fri., June 13, 8 p.m., World Café Live, 3025 Walnut St., 215-222-1400, worldcafelive.com. ChesnuTT’s offer to audiences on this so-called S.O.S. Summer Tour is an enticing one: For the “first time in 10 years” he’s playing tracks from his luscious, lo-fi double-disc debut, The Headphone Masterpiece. Released in 2002, the same year he appeared on the Roots’ Phrenology with his rollicking,

co-penned “The Seed (2.0),” Masterpiece all but defined his bohemian blend of stuttering soul, gospel and slow punky riffs. Sadly, he hasn’t recorded much more since then — the Black Skin No Value EP in 2010, the Landing on a Hundred fulllength in 2012 — but that one shining moment was blindingly brilliant enough to last five lifetimes. —A.D. Amorosi

[ folk/rock ]

ANDREW JacKSON JIHaD $15 | Fri., June 13, 8 p.m., with Cheap Girls and Dogbreth, Union Transfer, 1026 Spring Garden St., 215-821-7575, r5productions.com. Both a bowl of angel hearts and a coffin full of orphans show up pretty early on Christmas Island (SideOneDummy), An-

drew Jackson Jihad’s latest LP, not-so-gently reminding us that singer/guitarist Sean Bonnette’s greatest strength is his tragicomic utility with poetic devices. Behind the band’s expanded, five-strong arrangements, Bonnette chews up metaphors like handfuls of Nacho Cheesier Doritos. At one point, he’s a toilet in a restaurant. Then he’s a vampire hunter but also a pregnant mother. Wait, now he’s “a hologram of a tanning booth in a history class from the future” or “the nuclear test Operation Dominic that gave my grandfather cancer.” It’s some pretty trippy shit. The cello hums, the organ grinds and AJJ’s signature acoustic guitar and stand-up bass filter through off-kilter effects. It’s one hell of a fever dream. —Marc Snitzer

6.14 [ blues ]

will be the Holmes Brothers’ CD party for Brotherhood (Alligator). PS: If you’re wondering what XPN’s Jonny Meister looks like, he’s hosting that show. —Mary Armstrong

STATE STREET BLUES StROLL

[ world/rock/psych ]

saturday

FREE-$20 | Sat., June 14, 6 p.m.-1:15 a.m., (indoor stages are $15-$20, outdoor stages are free), Media, Pa., statestreetblues.com.

$17 | Sat., June 14, 8:30 p.m., with Oli­ver, Union Transfer, 1026 Spring Gar­ den St., 215-232-2100, utphilly.com.

One ticket gets you access to all 24 stages along State Street in Media. For the penurious — or those who want the kids to hear live music — there are free outdoor stages sans booze. Local faves like the Dukes of Destiny, Steve Guyger and Andrea Carlson make triumphant returns. At the Media Theater, the most formal sit-down presentation

Of all the random recent additions to Sub Pop’s rapidly diversifying portfolio, this has to be one of the weirdest: an enigmatic, mask-wearing troupe of (allegedly) voodoopracticing villagers hailing (we are told) from the tiny town of Korpilombolo in far northern Sweden. The very idea of signing to a record label seems

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[ events ]

like an impossibly mundane concept for such an ensemble, but then I guess even shadowy, self-mythologizing collec-

tives of remote Scandinavian (oc)cultists have got to eat somehow. They already have one absolute corker of a shaggy, psychedelic, ambiguously eth-

nic rock record — 2012’s infectious, heavy-grooving World Music — under their (bonestudded, reindeer-leather, etc.) belts, amply documenting their appeal even though it’s probably a mere taster compared to what they get into as a live act. —K. Ross Hoffman

6.15 sunday

[ rock/pop ]

TWEENS $10 | Sun., June 15, 8 p.m., with Bleeding Rainbow and The No Nos, Underground Arts, 1200 Callowhill St., undergroundarts.org. If loving cute girls singing angsty punk is wrong, I don’t want to be right. Tweens lead singer/ guitarist/songwriter Bridget Battle’s alluring whine cuts through the dirty distortions

[ events ]

The record, like Dutch-born multidisciplinarian Nick Van Hofwegen’s drawing, is cheery and stylized. It’s vaguely urban but not remotely edgy, and packed with quirky little details that are subsumed into a tidily composed whole. It’s perhaps a tad monochrome (albeit definitely not in such a White Stripes-y way). Coincidentally or not, his past cover-art clients — Foster the People, Maroon 5, Robin Thicke — form an excellent set of reference points for the album’s glossy, accessible blue-eyed pop-soul, although Y&S veers rather synthier, taking a more upbeat spin on the recent wave of moody indie electro-R&B. —K. Ross Hoffman

[ electronic ]

EVIAN CHRISt $10 | Wed., June 18, 10 p.m., with K|Rex, Dolphin Tavern, 1539 S. Broad St., 215-278-7950, thedolphinphilly.com.

and the liberal wild cymbal smashes to create the crunchy, spunky sound that scored these bratty youngsters an opening slot on a Breeders tour last year. —Maggie Grabmeier

6.18

wednesday [ pop/electronic ]

YOUNG & SICK $12-$14 | Wed., June 18, 9:15 p.m., with Bent Denim, Johnny Brenda’s, 1201 N. Frankford Ave., 215-7399684, johnnybrendas.com. If the customary injunction against judging by covers might be relaxed when the same party is responsible for both the musical content and its accompanying visuals, then Young & Sick’s self-titled debut (Harvest) — and its fantastical eye-catching cityscape — merits some quick formal analysis.

This young Brit isn’t exactly the most prolific producer out there: His recorded output to date consists of two 15-minute EPs over two years, plus one short experimental ambient piece that’s categorized on Discogs.com as “non-music.” But he more than compensates in terms of sheer sonic impact. His Kings and Them EP (from 2012) wove hiphop vocal fragments through disorienting, intoxicating cloud-trap vaporscapes, warm and spacious yet hard-hitting enough to induce Kanye West to tap him for a Yeezus production assist. This year’s Waterfall EP (Tri Angle) drops the sampled rap braggadocio but cranks up the intensity several-fold, putting a decidedly bleaker twist on the headrush maximalism of Rustie and Hudson Mohawke with brutally crushing artillery blasts and ping-ponging bleeps and skitters evoking a demonically possessed windup toy. —K. Ross Hoffman

MORE

citypaper.net/events

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Stock | Zahav alums/married couple Tyler Akin and Nicole Reigle have opened their much-anticipated Fishtown BYO Vietnamese spot, Stock. Prices are on par with the pho joints on Washington Avenue — nothing over $10 — but Akin and Reigle are upping the ante with stocks made with the bones of grass-fed cattle and mushroom-based vegan pho options. Beef cheek and duck sausage banh mis are on the lunch menu as well as small plates and salads, including watercress with lotus, green daikon and durian; and raw flank with cured egg, kaffir lime and annatto plus a cooling papaya salad for dessert. Akin and Reigle are sourcing their pho spices from La Boîte, a high-end epicerie based in New York, making for some seriously aromatic broth with perfectly toothsome rice noodles and ultra fresh herbs for garnishing. Extra points for excellent Vietnamese iced coffee spiked with chicory. Dinner, Thu.-Mon., 5:30-10:30 p.m.; lunch, Sat.-Sun., 11 a.m.-2 p.m. 308 E. Girard Ave., stockphilly.com.

HEAD ON: Tempura-fried crispy soft-shell shrimp with yuzu and jalapeño. NEAL SANTOS

Federal Donuts | Continuing their fried chicken and fancies world domination, the fifth outpost of Federal Donuts is open for business in Poplar. The biggest yet, FedNuts features lots of local love with coffee from Elixr and a collaboration doughnut sundae made with Little Baby’s Ice Cream. Look out for new Thai curry fried chicken and lots of thrilling doughnut options, including chocolate cake with milk glaze, lemon crème, blueberry mascarpone, salted tehina and blackberry walnut. Open daily 7 a.m.-7 p.m. or sell out. 701 N. Seventh St., federaldonuts.com. Italiano’s | South Philadelphia water-ice aficionados can take a breath — after a year-long hiatus, Italiano’s is back in business. It’s not really all that much of a shock that the lines at the walk-up window grow long on hot summer nights for scoops of classic water ice flavors like cherry, lemon and pineapple. Italiano’s is the home of the gelati, an only-in-Philly parfait of water ice and soft serve ice cream. According to Italiano’s hand-painted signage: “Back in 1975 mom put water ice and ice cream together and decided to call it ‘Gelati.’ We are definitely the original … anyone using the ‘Gelati’ name is just playing follow the leader.” Open daily 9 a.m.-10 p.m. 2551 S. 12th St., 215-465-1780. Got A Tip? Please send restaurant news to restaurants@ citypaper.net or call 215-735-8444, ext. 207. 28 | P H I L A D E L p H I A C I T Y PA p E R |

[ review ]

BAR SEATS Japanese bar bites, but no sushi, at coZara — the latest from Zama. By Adam Erace COZARA| 3200 Chestnut St., 267-233-7488, cozaraphilly.com. Mon.-

Thu., 11:30 a.m.-10 p.m.; Fri., 11:30 a.m.-11 p.m.; Sat., 5-11 p.m.; Sun., 5-9 p.m. Small bites, $4-$12; bites, $6-$13; whole chicken, $39; dessert, $3-$4.

I

n an era when chefs can’t expand their empires fast enough, there’s something to be said for taking your time. Hiroyuki “Zama” Tanaka’s parents must have instilled in him that patience is a virtue. The Japanese chef opened his eponymous sushi temple off Rittenhouse Square in 2009 and managed to resist snakeoil suitors for five years before locking in a lease for a second restaurant at American Campus Communities’ new Drexel development. That second venture is coZara, which sounds like a brother brand to the Euro fashion retailer, but, in fact, is Japanese for “small plates.” They’re the focus at this izakaya, and most are tasty enough to make it easy to forgive the restaurant’s dim design. We’re not just talking light fixtures (red drums, wire trumpet pendants) and floors (poured concrete). It’s everything. The capitalization in coZara isn’t a cardinal sin, but follows a disturbing trend of restaurants wanting their names to resemble AIM screen names. On the menu, a font that belongs on an invitation for a 6-

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year-old's birthday party undermines the sophistication of truffled eel and yuzu soy crème. A long chef’s counter — don’t call it a sushi bar; there is no sushi here — offers a row of seats fronting the gleaming open kitchen. On top, tall stacks of jade, teal and orange bowls and plates provide glints of color and joy. Next to the chef’s counter, a small cocktail bar holds a half-dozen drinkers, one mustachioed bartender and 15 sakes. Take it easy on the excellent list if you plan to ascend the red metal staircase to the mezzanine dining room. I sat downstairs, at one of the tables lined up along a bank of windows emblazoned with a giant red kana symbol representing the letter Z and looking like the mockingjay symbol from The Hunger Games. The separation between indoor and outdoor feels as thin, but not in a good way. With my back exposed to the street, I had a dark thought: “This is how people get assassinated.” Observed my guest, a former commercial realestate broker, “This is what you get from a developer build-out.” Chef Zama contends he had a lot of freedom in the design, but it’s hard to reconcile the tranquil, glass-smooth beauty of his Rittenhouse restaurant with coZara’s generic box. If those windows didn’t afford views of the resurgent Drexel campus, you’d think you were in Cherry Hill. Fortunately, there was nothing suburban about the food, a parade of traditional and reinterpreted snacks that began

ReaD MORe citypaper.net/ mealticket

>>> continued on adjacent page

[ food & drink ]

✚ Bar Seats <<< continued from previous page

“I wanted to bring what izakaya means in Japan,â€? says Zama. with a surprising chilled buckwheat soba salad mined with slices of refreshing Asian pear and ended with vanilla ice cream drizzled with sticky sweet soy syrup reminiscent of — and better than — salted caramel. “I wanted to bring what izakaya means in Japan,â€? says Zama, who first started cooking at Camp Zama, the American Army base that eventually provided his nickname. “It’s where people go after work, a small-dish-anddrinking scene, not like a general Japanese restaurant.â€? The menu is a master class of Japanese bar food — full of salt and fat and texture. It included shio buta, saltbraised pork belly that melted at the sight of chopsticks. Crispy soft-shell shrimp — “eat the whole thing,â€? the server advised — in tempura cocoons with jalapeĂąo and lime. Outstanding yakionigiri, soft and chewy teriyaki rice cakes designed to soak up a belly full of alcohol. It bears repeating: There is no sushi at coZara, and some of Zama’s disciples aren’t happy about it. For this very reason, Zama is careful about how he describes his new place. “I’m not saying this is my second restaurant,â€? he explains. “It’s Zama bringing another, different concept to Philly.â€? When the conversation began in 2012, Zama had planned to do a noodle bar, but as larger spaces became available, he expanded the restaurant’s reach to full-scale izakaya, which fits neatly in with nearby eateries. But even with Drexel on a trimester schedule and university staffers who live in the area, coZara was dead when I visited on a late, post-graduation weeknight. To the staffers’ credit, they didn’t rush us out or cringe when we ordered the $39 whole chicken yakitori, the menu’s showpiece. Brined for a day with ginger, garlic, star anise and soy, the bird gets broken down, threaded onto skewers, grilled and arranged in a fun, party-pleasing mountain crowned with a sail of chicken skin. Sadly, that greasy, rubbery skin needed to be cooked a lot longer. And the gizzards were so hard, they might as well have been Legos. Lined between bits of scallion, the nuggets of breast and thigh were passively enjoyable, more vehicles for the three accompanying sauces (miso honey-mustard, yakitori, vinegary hot sauce), delicious in their own right. Such a high-profile dish should show more effort. There were some other issues. A Sichuan peppercornand-miso marinade failed to penetrate a dish of measly lamb chops. The red-bean pancakes sandwiching greentea pastry cream was too savory (and bready) for dessert. The menu’s affordability, at least, makes it easy to absorb the cost of mistakes. Not every University City student has a trust fund, and coZara is catering to a budget-conscious crowd with happy hours featuring select drink and food for $2. That should bring them in. After all, what’s an izakaya without the crowd? (adam.erace@gmail.com)

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Boats & Accessories Feasterville/Trevose 3BR rancher w/lg EIK. New roof & remodeled bath. Fenced in yard. $200,000. Ask about possible Seller Assist. 215-962-9677 Holland, Bucks County. lg stone single split level. on ½+ acre lot. 3BR, 2½ BA. Council Rock schools. $375,000. Maryland Ave LLC. 609-266-0915

Mobile Homes New & Pre-owned Mobile Homes in Bensalem. Please Call Terry’s Mobile Homes 215-639-2422

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CARE AND PROTECTION TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS SUMMONS BY PUBLICATION DOCKET NUMBER: 11CP0246SP COMMONWEALTH OF MASSACHUSETTS Hampden County Juvenile Court 80 State Street. Springfield, MA 01102. 413-748-7714 TO: UNKNOWN/UNNAMED FATHER OF MALIK SHEPARD-SAVION LOCKETT, born on July 6, 2007 to LEAH SIMONE LOCKETT A petition has been presented to this court by the Dept. of Children and Families, Springfield, seeking, as to the subject child(ren) MALIK SHEPARD-SAVION LOCKETT, that said child(ren) be found in need of care and protection and committed to the Department of Children and Families. The court may dispense the rights of the person named herein to receive notice of or to consent to any legal proceeding affecting the adoption, custody, or guardianship or any other disposition of the child(ren) named herein, if it finds that the child(ren) is/are in need of care and protection and that the best interests of the child(ren) would be served by said disposition. You are hereby ORDERED to appear in this court, at the court address set forth above, on 07/01/2014, at 9:00 AM PERMANENCY HEARING. You may bring an attorney with you. If you have a right to an attorney and if the court determines that you are indigent, the court will appoint an attorney to represent you. If you fail to appear, the court may proceed on that date and any date thereafter with a trial on the merits of the petition and an adjudication of this matter. For further information call the Office of the Clerk-Magistrate at 413-748-7714.

Help Wanted

WITNESS: Hon. Daniel J. Swords. FIRST JUSTICE

AfrIca, BraZIl WOrk/ STuDy!

Donald P Whitney CLERK-MAGISTRATE DATE ISSUED: 05/28/2014

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To place your FREE ad (100 word limit) ➤ email lovehate@citypaper.net CENTRAL PARK FUN Did I or did I not suggest we take a blanket, brown bag our wine, do up a food basket, and go to Central Park and play Dirty Minds on some wonderfully sunny and crisp fall afternoon? Did I suggest we had to touch each other? No. Did I suggest we had to be dating? No. Did I suggest anything but relaxing fun? No. But there you go again, making me the evil one. Oh, what in this world is a girl to do?

day would knock me down, you were there in the night to pick me up. Your touch was music to my soul, now it only echos painfully away from my mind.

I SEEM TO HATE YOU! You know I thought to myself time and time again, do I like you or do I hate you and I have come to this conclusion that I do hate you and I have to admit that it feels fucking good to get the shit out of my system finally and do what comes natural!

could have been. I realize today you never loved me, and I quess I didnt love me either to let you hurt me over and over again. Times have changed me, and although I was crushed when you left me for Memorial Day brought me a brand new soul, and I will be the best you never had..

LOVE YOU Michell, what the fuck is wrong with you don’t you know when someone loves you with every bit of their heart, its like you don’t care at all about

This is to the bitch who was in front of me when I was trying to catch the train to work. You fat ass bitch, I don’t know where you were going but you could have tried to walk a little faster so that the people behind you could have gotten on the damn train. I don’t know you but I hate your fat ass. Then your going to sit on the bench and pretend that you are fucking reading a damn book. Knowing that you aren’t reading it! I hate you and your fakeass ponytail! Do me a favor when I see you again, move your fat ass so that people with real jobs can come through! Bye bitch I hope I don’t see you ugly ass again!

PHOTO BY NEAL SANTOS

DAMN FAT BITCH

DUMB BITCHES Come in all shapes and sizes...why the fuck would you text on your cornyass phone going up the fucking stairs..you don’t even make any sense of what you are doing. Why would you do that going up the steps? Doesn’t make any sense why don’t you walk the fuck up the steps and then text the moron that is waiting for the text. I hate you dumbass folks that don’t understand that everything has a place. Texting is definitely not the place as of walking up the fucking steps. Jerks...both the men and the stupid ass women!

FREE AD ENTRY Looking out from the Art Museum stairs I could sense you with me. This life and society have claimed another romance. The day isn’t long enough for our love to last, only to work and study until you slowly lose yourself. The empty space I feel spins me in circles and I can’t seem to catch my footing for a new path. As every single 32 | P H I L A D E L p H I A C I T Y PA p E R |

NICE GUYS But I keep going out with you because you’re really nice to me and you pay for all the dates, and the head you give me is good. Yes, I know that is totally selfish, but I told you I was selfish when we first started going out so you shouldn’t be surprised. But sooner or later you will realize that I really don’t want to do anything sexual to you and that I keep coming up with excuses or intentionally falling asleep after I orgasm. But I don’t think you’re that bright either so it will probably be later.

NOT WORTH IT!

ADOP T

ME

DO YOU Do you compulsively “feel” in the moment? Do you laugh when people talk shit about you? Do you bite back? Do you pass on intellectual snobbery? Do you like to study ideas? Do you create ideas of your own? Do you sing? Ride a bike? Do you have a creative outlet other than ILYIHY? Do you love because your heart is so big that it feels like it will burst out of your chest if it is not shared? Do you believe in love at first sight? Do you constantly fall for the wrong one? Do you friend your exes? Do you love to pleasure yourself? Do you wear pajamas? Do you make time to be a kid? Maybe we’re not right for each other. Maybe we only exist online. Maybe that’s as close as we’ll ever get.

help! cause I wanna see you live. I love you were ever you are love, Tommy.

DIESEL!

LESS THAN 1 YEAR OLD

I’m Diesel, a rambunctious young adult pit bull mix who’s looking for a friend! I’m under a year old, I love kids and I’ve lived with cats before. I’m an energetic boy who would make a great running buddy. Please give me a home!

Located on the corner of 2nd and Arch.

All PAWS animals are spayed/neutered, vaccinated, and microchipped before adoption. For more information, call 215-238-9901 ext. 30 or email adoptions@phillypaws.org

Stay away from your dumb ass and do what I need to do! I don’t want to be like someone that I know keep going back to the same old bullshit over and over again! It really doesn’t make any sense to do that! i just want you to stay away, go marry your bum bitch that fucked your brother! i think that you probably would of stood there and watched if you would of known, but you got what you deserved she fucked your brother now deal with it! Dummy!

KICK ROCKS ALREADY Every now and then I think back at us, at what

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life, you don’t know how bad I felt that night when i told you to leave i cryed all night and then you called me two hours later and it was like putting a dagger in my heart, all I ever wanted was for us to work this thing out together and to get the fuck out of this shit hole, we were supposed to be a team. And them two beautiful girls you have should make you want to work even harder at life they love you so much anyone can see that, I just want you to know that I still love you very much but its out of my hands its up to you now if you ever wanted me back it would take a hole hell of alot and I don’t know if you are ready. Please get

I have came to a big conclusion that you are not worth my time! I am not going to keep pursuing you over and over like a fool! I am done when I get home I am going to erase your face from my fucking screen saver! Honestly I don’t know why you sent it to me if you knew that you weren’t going to be sticking around for anything! The sooner I erase your texts and stuff the better off I will be! I am too sexy of a person, to a good of a person to deal with these childish games! Have fun and you’ll never see Atlantic City on my dime...believe that!

PEOPLE ARE A MESS I hate you I just wanted to say and to everyone that is reading this that did something to someone you are probably guilty of feeling my hatred! This one is for all of you! I hate phony people. You just seem as though every time I see you you’re kissing someone’s ass and it is very exhausting and I am tired of seeing it and hearing it! You are an asshole, and I can’t believe that you lasted so long. Just because you are cool with management doesn’t mean that you are exempt from doing what you need to get done! Nobody is going to protect you from the bullshit that you keep throwing out! I think that it is pathetic! Who do you really think you are? Grow some fucking balls already or grow a pussy!

SEXY! Why are you and I so fucking compatible? I keep wondering why...you sex me and I feel like I am floating somewhere on a cloud. I never had someone make me feel like that before. I always wonder why you deal with me, if you love me why can’t you just say that you love me! I wondering if you love me because I help you...are you going to do the same in return for me? I don’t know how long this is going to last but I do know that I don’t want it to end! I love you so much!

✚ ADS ALSO APPEAR AT CITYPAPER.NET/lovehate. City Paper has the right to re-publish “I Love You, I Hate You”™ ads at the publisher’s discretion. This includes re-purposing the ads for online publication, or for any other ancillary publishing projects.

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