Tolerance: A Christian Issue (March/April 2013)

the paradox of tolerance: no room for jesus good news people: what we’re really about the other church: do we really love our neighbours?

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march – april, 2013

Tolerance: A Christian Issue

contents

january – february, 2013 on the cover

Tolerance: A Christian Issue What does following Jesus look like in a supposedly “tolerant” society like Canada? Is there any place left for Christians, or has Jesus been deemed “intolerable?”

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march – april, 2013

CHR-044X-0213_ SEVEN_Issue_29 2/16/13 1:34 AM Page 1

SEVEN is a Christian magazine for Canadian men that exists to help men lead more fulfilling lives and leave enduring legacies.

14 The Paradox of Tolerance | mark hughes “Christians under fire—in such a rich, diverse and accepting society as Canada, why is it that Christianity finds itself facing such strong opposition? How has the definition of tolerance changed historically?

Tolerance: A Christian Issue

17

the paradox of tolerance: no room for jesus good news people: what we’re really about the other church: do we really love our neighbours?

20

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Good News People

| bruce clemenger It’s a sad reality that evangelicals are often known more for what we are against than what we are for. Exploring our place as the “Light of the World.”

The Other Church

| nate larkin We see them all the time, but how well do we really know our brothers and sisters in Christ? As it turns out, our differences are more subtle than you might think.

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5 PK Podium Oh Canada...our home and tolerant land?

8 Pulse Bits. Blips. Beats. Blurbs.

five – A promise keeper is committed to supporting the mission of his church by honouring and praying for his pastor, and by actively giving his time and resources. six – A promise keeper is committed to reaching beyond racial, social, economic, generational, and denominational barriers to demonstrate that power of biblical unity.

11 Reviews Tackling tolerance.

Practical purity.

seven – A promise keeper is committed to influencing the world by his fervent love for God while loving his neighbour, seeking justice for the poor and oppressed, and making disciples of Jesus Christ.

28 Power Play Tools. Toys. Technology.

26 Money Matters Leading a life worth living 27 Out of My Depth Taking the call to “love our neighbours” seriously.

The PK Canada logo features a maple leaf, indicating our dedication to serve the men of Canada. An arrow breaks into the maple leaf symbolizing the impact we believe God wants to see Promise Keepers and men making in our nation.

30 What Women Want Making peace means more than just keeping it

29 25

two – A promise keeper is committed to pursuing Christ-centred friendships with a few other men, connecting regularly, understanding that he needs brothers to help him keep his promises.

four – A promise keeper is committed to strengthening families and marriages through love, honour, protection, and biblical values.

departments

24 Sports Scene Canucks defenceman finds joy in NHL lockout

one – A promise keeper is committed to honouring Jesus Christ through worship, prayer, and obedience to God’s Word in the power of the Spirit.

three – A promise keeper is committed to practicing biblical integrity: spiritually, morally, ethically and sexually.

columns

6 Man to Man Accountability—don’t take “no” for an answer

The name reflects the seven promises that form the basis of the Promise Keepers organization, which works with churches to minister to men across Canada.

Publisher: Brian Koldyk Editorial Director: Jeff Stearns Managing Editor: Rob Horsley Copyeditor: Kelly Rempel

advertising John Steadman jsteadman@promisekeepers.ca 1-888-901-9700

editorial advisory board MARC BRULE: WellSpring Community Church ROB HORSLEY: ChristianWeek KIRK GILES: Promise Keepers Canada JEFF STEARNS: Promise Keepers Canada MATT BREIMER: Promise Keepers Canada

A special thank-you to all the pastors who continually encourage us to communicate God's truth with grace and love.

Promise Keepers Canada Box 20099 RPO Brant Hills Burlington, ON L7P 0A4 (905) 331-1830 info@promisekeepers.ca Postmaster: Please send address changes to Box 20099 RPO Brant Hills, Burlington, ON L7P 0A4

editorial 204-424 Logan Avenue Winnipeg, MB R3A 0R4 Phone: (204) 982-2060 (800) 263-6695 admin@christianweek.org Design: ’Segun Olude www.indigoinkstudios.com

ISSN 1916-8403 Cover image: iStockphoto

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PK@HOME RESOURCES

Visit our new website for the latest info, videos, audio messages, men’s articles, books and other resources.

Men of Integrity Devotional Especially written for men, personally challenging, eternally rewarding.

Available in a 60 page booklet or as an email devotional.

SEVEN Magazine Men. God. Life.

A Christian magazine for Canadian men.

Relevant, exciting and biblical.

Visit us online at www.PromiseKeepers.ca and

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PK Podium

Oh Canada. Our Home and Tolerant Land?

Christians have always had to live in a world that is not entirely friendly to Jesus

by Kirk Giles

Tolerance (def’n): A fair, objective, and permissive attitude toward those whose opinions, practices, race, religion, nationality, etc, differ from one’s own; freedom from bigotry.

Interest in and concern for ideas, opinions, practices, etc, foreign to one’s own; a liberal, un-dogmatic viewpoint.

One of the recent, key words used in Canadian society has been the word “tolerance.” The definition of this word (taken from Dictionary.com) is extremely helpful for us to understand what exactly is meant when it is used. Unfortunately, those who tend to use the word are often guilty of not practising what they preach.

Many people will remember a story we told in the spring of 2011 about the firing of Damian Goddard from Rogers Sportsnet after he wrote on Twitter his belief that same-sex marriage was wrong. After this happened, I wrote comments on my own Twitter account that showed support for Damian and hockey agent Todd Reynolds regarding their rights to share their opinion on this matter.

Immediately, I started to receive comments on Twitter that were hateful and were calling me intolerant and a bigot.

I know that the comments I received were mild compared to those that Goddard and Reynolds received.

Somewhere along the way, tolerance came to mean that people are not entitled to their own beliefs if they disagree with the beliefs of someone else.

Of course, the problems with that line of thinking are

many because that would mean no one can really have a belief or opinion because it will inevitably go against what someone else believes.

I will not pretend to understand what people of other religions, nationalities, etc experience in terms of tolerance, but I do know that many Christians have certainly experienced intolerance—as used in the first definition—towards their opinions and practices. Of course, that is nothing new.

A brief reading of the New Testament, along with many other modern and historical documents, will reveal that Christians have always had to live in a world that is not entirely friendly to Jesus or His followers. As men who follow Jesus, we should be frustrated at how impossible it is to truly be tolerant, and righteously angry when we are on the receiving end of intolerance.

If we want to understand how to live in this kind of world, we do not have to go far—simply be students and imitators of Jesus and His disciples. He introduced a courageous way of living—a way of loving others while not compromising the truth of God’s design for humanity. The way of Jesus will often cause our persecution, and our response will show if we are living for our own self preservation or for the building of His Kingdom.

Jesus did not teach tolerance—He taught love for God first, and expressing that love for God by loving your neighbour and your enemy.

The team at Promise Keepers Canada has decided to address this important issue of tolerance because we need to know what it looks like to follow Jesus in an age of tolerance, we also need to know how to respond when those who preach it fail to live it in their opinions, practices, and concern for Christians.

Kirk Giles is the president of Promise Keepers Canada. However, his most important roles as a man are husband to Shannon and father to Carter, Joshua, Sydney and Samuel.

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man to man

Accountability: Who’s got your back?

Friends don't let friends off the hook

By Steve Sonderman

Like every Wednesday for the past 20 years, I’ll get up early this week to meet with two long-time friends, Rob and Mike. For the next hour and a half we will talk, laugh, cry, open the Word, pray, encourage one another, ask the tough questions, and bear one another’s burdens. Our motto has been “Become friends and change the world.”

We have made a commitment to be available to one another 24/7, to walk through the valley of the shadow of death together and to spur one another on to good deeds. Oh yes, and one more thing…to be accountable to one another for our thoughts, motives, speech, and behaviour. Although accountability is a nasty word for many people, I have found it instrumental in my growth as a father, husband, friend, and Christ-follower.

At the first PromiseKeepers conference I attended in 1993, I heard Howard Hendricks say, “A man not in an accountable relationship is a moral accident waiting to happen.” Those words have rung in my ears all these years and

have been a guide to all we have done in our ministry to men at Elmbrook Church in Wisconsin.

While there are many ways to define accountability, the one we use is “giving others the freedom to help you order your private and public lives.” Over the years I have learned that for accountability to work correctly there are certain key components that must be present.

Relationship. Accountability with one or more men will only work when a mutual relationship has been developed. I know Rob and Mike love me and want the best for me, and as a result I allow them into my life.

Trust. For accountability to work, you have to trust the other people to keep what you share confidential. For 15 years I helped lead the chapel services for the Milwaukee Brewers. There was a sign above the door that said, “What you see here and hear here stays here.”

Imagine that sign above the door to your meeting room. Trust takes time and you cannot rush the process.

FINDING AN ACCOUNTABILITY GROUP OR PERSON Prayer. Begin by praying for God to lead you to the right man or group of men.

Look in your relational sphere. As you talk with friends, men at church, or in a small group, ask who you have a natural affinity with, who you are drawn to and who seems to be headed in the same direction as you. Normally it will be someone you know where a relationship has already begun.

Invite the person or group to coffee or lunch. Spend some time getting to know the person or group better and ask if they are interested in going deeper with the Lord and one another.

Ask to become accountability partners. If you are confident this is the right person or group, ask if they would be willing to start meeting on a regular basis for the purpose of accountability and prayer. Once you start meeting, keep in mind it will take time for trust and honesty to be developed.

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Honesty. Most men are afraid to share what is really going on in their lives because they think they are the only ones struggling. As a result, men hide the truth and try to portray themselves as someone they’re not. Take the risk and share the skeletons in your closet. As you do, other men will normally follow.

Voluntary. Accountability cannot be forced. I need to give my friends permission to ask me the hard questions in the areas I want to and need to grow.

For example, I have a tendency to be passive in my relationships with my two sons, and so I have asked Mike and Rob to ask me what I have done during the last week to build those relationships. Each week, I set aside my Thursday lunch time to drive downtown and take one of my sons to lunch and Mike and Rob have permission to ask me each week if I have done that.

Encouragement. With asking the tough questions each week comes the necessity of encouragement. When one of us takes a step of faith the others cheer him on.

When one of us says no to sin, we cheer him on.

Keep the end in mind. The goal of accountability is not behaviour modification, nor is to check it off a list, but rather as Paul says, “to walk in a manner worthy of Christ.” So whether it is asking tough questions, providing wise counsel, encouraging each other when down, or just being available, I have found it to be integral to my walk with Jesus. I hope you will as well.

Steve Sonderman is Pastor at Elmbrook Church in Brookfield, Wisconsin and founder of No Regrets Men’s Ministries. He consults widely with churches worldwide, sharing his passion for ministry to men in every local church. He makes his home in Borrokfield with his wife, Colleen.

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Bits + Blips. Beats + Blurbs.

THIS MONTH’S EDITION OF THE PULSE COULD VERY WELL BE CALLED THE NATIONAL POST EDITION. It’s not that we’re advocating that you read The Post over any other Canadian news publication, but occasionally it contains some interesting—or downright unusual—news and information.

Take the following two stories, for instance.

POWER TO CHANGE MINISTRIES OFFERS SOME TIPS AND ENCOURAGEMENT FOR CHRISTIANS WHO HAVE BEEN DOWN THAT TOUGH ROAD BUT STILL YEARN TO LOVE GOD.

• Seek counseling or grief support: it’s important to talk it through with the people who can lend an open ear to what you might be going through • Start a journal: even if you’re not the journaling type, it can be helpful to put thoughts down on paper for organization and analysis • Start a job search (if finances are an issue): Find help from a friend who can help you get your resume together. It’s important to take care of yourself financially, and easy to make a bad situation worse by losing sight of money issues.

• Set goals for yourself: Make good choices; strive to do things that will have a positive impact on your life.

• Accept that life will be a challenge: Coming to terms with being divorced is by no means easy, and trying to convince yourself otherwise isn’t all that helpful. But in every trial there are new opportunities for growth. God will help you persevere and mature in the midst of this trial.

“Consider it pure joy… whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.

Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” (James 1:2-4) Visit http://powertochange.com/experience/sexlove/divorce/ for more on this, as well as other resources.

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BEATS

BITS

by Rob Horsley, PULSE Editor with special guest writer Robert White

National Post writer Jen Gerson recently had the opportunity to interview Edmonton-based yoga instructor Chris McBain. What’s so interesting about that, you ask?

The class is for men only—an oddity in itself—but is also done entirely in the nude for all participants.

McBain says the class is done in this manner to serve as a lesson in “self-acceptance,” writes Gerson.

While it might seem odd—as if nothing else about this is odd in any way—the class has actually become quite popular.

Ms. Gerson does a fairly good job in keeping the interview professional for the most part, though a few awkward questions regarding male anatomy (which I dare not repeat here) and how it might affect one’s ability to participate, manage to find their way into the conversation.

Can’t imagine the Garden of Eden feeling that awkward…

For those morbidly interested, read more at http://tinyurl.com/bzqo2py.

pulse

BITS

BEATS

MALE VICTIMS LESS LIKELY TO REPORT ABUSE According to ACT Associates counselor Janice Czechowsky, stories of abuse are becoming increasingly commonplace and aren’t being viewed as a “hot-button issue,” anymore, particularly among men.

“There are changes that still need to happen and we need to pay attention to males who are victims,” she says.

While it has become more acceptable for women to share their abuse experiences, men, on average, have not been as comfortable in reporting instances of abuse in their lives. In addition to the shame that often accompanies talking about abuse, men also face the added challenge of not being able to leave domestically violent situations as easily.

Divorce is messy— perhaps especially for Christians. And while Jesus makes it clear in Matthew 19 that divorce should never be anyone’s “Plan A,” it’s hard to tell that to someone who’s already been through it, without sounding like condemnation.

Many men’s shelters don’t allow children, making the decision for a husband to leave an abusive situation especially difficult, with many of them not wanting to leave their children at home, out of sight.

Czechowsky says that churches, even small, volunteer-led congregations, can take the initiative to create an environment where victims of abuse, particularly those in the Church, feel open enough to be open about their experiences.

“It’s happening in our family and we have to acknowledge it and say it’s not OK,” she says.

(The Link and Visitor, January/February 2013)

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pulse

BEATS

ACCORDING TO RESEARCHERS AT THE UNIVERSITY OF BONN IN GERMANY, THE POPULAR VIAGRA PILL MAY HOLD SOME POTENTIAL AS A WEIGHT LOSS DRUG FOR MEN WHO TAKE IT. In addition to its well-documented affects on the male libido, researchers believe that Viagra may have the ability to enhance weight loss by converting undesirable white fat cells into the beige cells that help to burn calories instead of storing them.

Findings like these are encouraging, National Post says, as it could lead a decrease in the risks of cardiovascular disease that can lead to heart attacks or strokes, as well as lower chances of diabetes and cancer.

But while news like this is promising, tests have only so far been conducted on mice. As Sarah MacDonald of the Post writes, “popping a Viagra a day to keep the doctor away” might not be the best option at this point.

Cue the inappropriate jokes…

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Photo by tombaky/DepositPhotos

For the full story see: http://tinyurl.com/a64grpj

Tackling Tolerance. Practicing Purity.

Reviews by Jeff Stearns

THE INTOLERANCE OF TOLERANCE

TRUE PURITY

by D.A. Carson In this edition of SEVEN we have attempted to give readers a brief introduction to some of the issues surrounding our culture’s shifting definition of tolerance. If we have spurred your curiosity to delve deeper into an exploration of what this means for your faith, the Church and the future of our society, I can think of no better resource than D.A. Carson’s book, The Intolerance of Tolerance.

Carson does an excellent job of helping the reader understand the history behind the cultural shifts, and revealing the current mindset. “The charge of intolerance has come to wield enormous power in much of Western culture— at least as much as the charge of “communist” during the McCarthy years.” Thankfully Carson does not leave us stranded in our current situation but follows through with insights on ways to move ahead.

This is an excellent book for Christian leaders and lay people who wish to better understand how to communicate truth in a shifting landscape.

by Hayley and Michael DiMarco While this is a book written for youth, do not make the mistake of assuming that it’s light on content. Rather, this book conveys deeply profound ideas, ones that most adults have not grasped, in an easy to read style that is geared for youth.

When you hear about a “purity event,” most people immediately assume it’s about dating, sex or pornography.

Hayley and Michael correctly explain that godly purity involves so much more than “just saying no to you-know-what.”

True purity is about holiness in all areas of your life. “When your heart is tainted by the love of this world and the pursuit of all its goodies, whether you are sexually immoral or not, you are living an impure life.”

The authors explore what it means to live a pure life in love, community, self, mind and faith. The good news is “this book isn’t about your strength but His, and it isn’t about your failure but His success.”

Down to earth, practical and interwoven with Scripture, this is a book that most parents should encourage their teens to read and would probably benefit from reading themselves.

ALSO ON THE SHELF…

SLEEPING GIANT: NO MOVEMENT OF GOD WITHOUT MEN OF GOD

By Kenny Luck New resource for Promise Keepers Canada’s men’s ministry workshop.

YOUR CHURCH IS TOO SAFE

By Mark Buchanan The pastoral staff at my church just finished reading and this book and highly recommended it.

CREATURE OF THE WORD THE JESUS-CENTERED CHURCH

By Matt Chandler, Josh Patterson and Eric Geiger Just arrived on my desk. I have not had a chance to read it but with endorse-ments from Mark Driscoll, James McDonald, R. Albert Mohler, Larry Osbourne, Perry Noble and almost a dozen other pastors I am at least intrigued (or a sucker for marketing).

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features

PECULIAR PICS FROM AROUND THE WEB (these Flickr images are licensed under Creative Commons and

BEATS

used with attribution.

Some rights reserved.)

Looking to add a little more variety to your diet?

Try these killer new flavours!

Photo by epSos/Flickr

Running a marathon? How’s that for motivation?

If you think about it, he’s telling the truth.

Apparently this is a problem in some places…

Photo by @Doug88888/Flickr

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BEATS

BEATS

Photo by Moriartys/Flickr

VIOLENT VIDEO GAMES AND PORNOGRAPHY: A REASONABLE COMPARISON? In the wake of the horrific events at Sandy Hook Elementary in Newtown, Connecticut, the debate of “gun control” has once again emerged in the United States. While no serious talks of a Canadian overhaul have surfaced, the issue has been featured prominently in news networks across North America.

According to famed adult entertainer Ron Jeremy, studies indicate that violent video games have a more harmful impact on the minds of youth and adolescents than watching pornography. This statement appeared in an article in The Telegraph, a prominent news outlet in the United Kingdom.

Oddly enough, National Rifle Association CEO Wayne LaPierre offered a statement in which he said, “Isn’t fantasizing about killing people as a way to get your kicks really the filthiest form of pornography?”

But is such a comparison justified? While some have suggested there may be a link between viewing pornography and the subsequent likelihood of the viewer to commit rape, the case for a similar argument against violent video games is far more tentative.

Photo by yuichirock/Flickr

BLURB

pulse

However, some researchers do claim to have discovered a link between game violence and manifested aggression. According to an article from MSNBC, Ohio State communications professor Brad Bushman says that violent video games can and do lead to aggressive thoughts and angry feelings which can then take the form of violent actions. However he also says that the gaming industry is unlikely to change as there is simply too much money to be made, and consumers are still largely willing to pay.

Adam Shaw of The Catholic Register writes “unlike the use of pornography, playing video games is not inherently sinful. But morally minded gamers should evaluate the kind of influence to which they may be subject from the games they choose to play.”

While studies to this point have been inconclusive, such comparisons between the harmful effects of violent video games and pornography do raise an interesting question, particularly for Christian audiences. If we’ve concluded that pornography is harmful to the sanctity of sexuality within the context of marriage, and that it should be strictly avoided, should Christians avoid the use of violent media, such as movies, television, and (perhaps particularly) interactive video games?

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features

The Paradox of Tolerance Turbulent Times for Canadian Christians

By Mark Hughes

Tolerance is one of the great paradoxes of our time. It is considered as possibly the highest of all our cultural virtues.

It is expected and often demanded from Christians, yet rarely reciprocated.

It doesn’t help that the definition has changed. Tolerance once meant to put up with someone or something that we might not especially like. In our world today it means to regard all values, beliefs, and lifestyles as equal. For the Christian, that puts us in an untenable position as we are exhorted to discern between good and evil. Consequently, we cannot see hot button issues such as gay marriage or abortion as acceptable choices.

The Bible does not teach us to tolerate. The concept does not appear anywhere in Scripture. Nowhere are we exhorted to tolerate others. We are called to a much higher virtue: to love our neighbour and even to love our enemy. This does not mean “to put up with” nor does it mean to accept their values, beliefs, or lifestyles as being equal to those of the Christian faith.

Tolerance means to “love the sinner and hate the sin.”

Unfortunately, many Christians have been better at hating the sin than loving the sinner. But Jesus had this thing nailed. He never compromised who He was or what He believed and yet was a “friend of sinners.” They loved to hang out with Him, but He never compromised on His moral standards and even made bold proclamations like, “I am the way, the truth, and the life.

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No one comes to the Father except through Me.” That would be considered an intolerant statement by any measurement.

What was Jesus’ secret? He always demonstrated genuine love and care for even the most completely messed up people.

We can say the words, but are we really loving others if they don’t “feel” loved? Jesus had an uncommon ability in this regard. Because people seemed to know that He had purely loving motives, He was able to speak very definitively about right and wrong. Ironically Jesus offended the religious—not the sinner.

If we can also figure this out, we won’t get caught up in the modern tolerance paradox that is really a no-win situation for us.

Remember, it is impossible for most people to distinguish their behaviour from who they are. If we merely rail against their lifestyle and beliefs without developing genuine equity in their lives, they will perceive that as intolerant or worse yet, as hate speech.

Here is the other side of the paradox. Tolerance for the Christian has become a one-way street. We are expected to accept all views of others, but our views are not tolerated. In our culture today you cannot (and should not) criticize anyone’s religion, but Christianity is fair game. It has become open season on Christians. We are routinely called hatemongers, bigots, homophobes, racists, etc. all without cause or evidence.

Nobody cries foul, nobody gets censured when it is done in the media or in the public square. Christianity is without question the most persecuted religion in the world.

Michael Horowitz, a U.S. Jewish activist who has written on Christian persecution, contends there is a “blissful lack of awareness to this fact that is fostered by preconceptions and conventional wisdoms that lead many in the West to dismiss anti-Christian persecution as improbable, untrue, impossible.”

Recently appointed Winnipeg police chief Devon Clunis came under national scrutiny in October for calling people of [all] faith[s] to pray against violent crime Winnipeg. His comments on his faith and its role in his new job, as told in a ChristianWeek article, landed him in hot water after the mainstream media picked up on the story.

But of what crime is he guilty, exactly? The last time I looked, freedom of religion was still a fundamental constitutional right in Canada. Comments on the story are all over the map and range from hugely supportive, to angrily offended. Any time you get a response like that you know you have touched the cultural dividing line between the secular and the sacred.

We have heard so much about the separation of Church and State in our generation that many have come to believe it is some kind of immutable principle like gravity. To the contrary; that has never been a Canadian value and historically as a nation we have celebrated faith in the public forum. Psalm 72:8: “He shall have dominion also from sea to sea, and from the river unto the ends of the earth” is the inspiration behind our original name, the Dominion of Canada. Sir Samuel Leonard Tilley, the premier of New Brunswick and one of the fathers of confederation, suggested it. There was no national uproar that he would dare bring his faith into the public square.

I realize that times change. We are no longer living in 1867 and one could argue that we are no longer a monoculture that recognizes its Judeo-Christian roots, either. Still, it is ironic how a culture that holds “tolerance” as its highest virtue, is so intolerant to those of faith.

The biggest criticism of Clunis? Some seem to think he’s saying prayer alone will solve Winnipeg’s crime problems. He never said that. He merely asked the question as to what would happen if we put prayer behind our actions.

I also applaud Clunis for his convictions and fully support him. Nevertheless, he got himself caught up in the paradox of tolerance.

Clunis has demonstrated amazing courage by sticking his neck out on this one. Isn’t courage exactly the quality we need in a police chief? My prayer is that Canadian Christians will stand in support of Devon Clunis and pray that God will raise men and women like him up all over our nation.

Forget tolerance, it doesn’t work. If we really want our message to be heard we need to learn to love our neighbour, and our enemy, first. It’s easier said than done, but it is far more effective than trying to navigate the paradox of tolerance.

Mark Hughes is the founding pastor of Church of the Rock in Winnipeg, Manitoba. He, his wife Kathy, and their three children call the city home.

features

Good News People

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Photo by Evan Sharboneau/DepositPhotos

Finding our place as the Light of the World

features

By Bruce Clemenger

It’s a sad reality that evangelicals are often known more for what we are against than what we are for. There are two sides to this perception; the proclivity for others to frame us as the “anti” people, and our natural inclination to reinforce that idea.

How others see us In a rapidly changing and increasingly secular and liberal society, we often seek to defend that which others seek to change. This became more pronounced in the 1960s. Until then, scholars speak of a panChristian consensus that prevailed in Canada. At the celebration of Canada’s 100th birthday on Parliament Hill, the official program included Scripture reading, prayers, the signing of hymns and the recitation of the refrain by all gathered, “We rededicate ourselves O Lord, to thee.” However, things changed quickly.

In the same year as the birthday bash, then Justice Minister Pierre Elliot Trudeau introduced an omnibus bill that altered our laws on abortion, marriage and divorce, and sexual morality.

The bill passed in 1969 when Trudeau was prime minister.

Views of sexual morality, marriage and divorce, and abortion continue to divide Canadians.

The 1960s saw a rapid embrace of secularism in Quebec (the Quiet Revolution) where the Catholic Church lost its significant influence in politics, social program delivery and health care. The rest of Canada has also experienced the influence of secularism that promoted the marginalization and privatization of religion.

As John Webster Grant said, in 1967 Christendom was established, by 1987 it was a memory.

It is now individual autonomy and the desire for authenticity that increasingly shape our self-image as persons. Many of the social norms that once provided the foundation and plumb line for law and public policy are being questioned and reshaped.

In Psalm 2:3 we read, “Let us break their chains and throw off their shackles.”

When we read in the New Testament about bondage and freedom, it is usually about being released from the fetters of oppression, of the captives being released, the blind being given sight, all through the redemption offered by God through Jesus Christ (Luke 4).

However in Psalm 2 the chains and shackles that the kings of the earth want to break are the laws and decrees of God. The rulers sought freedom in the rejection of God’s law, and not in obedience to God’s truth.

When your views on an issue are seen as supporting that which others see as chains and shackles, you will be perceived as those who are resisting progress and freedom. You will be cast as the “anti” people.

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features

Photo by sebastien.barre/Flickr

Good News people

On a number of critical issues evangelicals are seeking to uphold or reinforce laws and policies that others, in the name of progress or diversity and individual rights, are seeking to change or eliminate.

As a result we are often framed as the “anti” group—those who oppose change that others desire, such as a new definition of marriage, or changes to laws governing assisted suicide and euthanasia. Since evangelicals are opposing that which others see as progress, we are placed on the defensive and framed as the resisters of progress and expressive freedom.

So while we are for healthy marriages between men and women, we were labeled anti-gay or anti-equal marriage. While we want to care for those who are dying rather than killing them, and respond to them in a way that honours life as a gift and the inestimable value of each person, we are framed as being antieuthanasia and against death with dignity.

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Even when we frame our position in the positive and in terms of what we are for (such as pro-life) the media and others frame us as the “anti” group (anti-abortion). And while the media usually call groups by the name the group uses to self define, when is comes to social issues evangelicals are given the “anti” label.

I have experienced this often. Working for the Evangelical Fellowship of Canada, I have attended many court hearings and been a witness before Parliamentary committees where I explain the consequences of changes to laws and the social impact that could result. I am usually cast as the “anti” person.

Contributing to the perception Part of the problem with how evangelicals are perceived is related to how we are characterized by those who disagree with us. Many see the marginalization and privatization of religion as

features

progress and the rejection of a transcendent frame of reference as liberating.

However, there is another reason the “anti” label often sticks.

Sometimes evangelicals fixate on what we see wrong rather than focusing on our preferred alternative. We often reinforce the image that we are against change, and that we fear progress.

In our protests or our sermons, in the rhetoric we employ in our conversations with friends and neighbours, we sometimes come across as angry and frustrated, warning about doom and gloom, and always complaining about the trajectory of society.

And yet we are people of the evangel, of good news. When a new Caesar came to power, heralds would head across the empire, announcing the evangel, the good news, that a new Caesar was in place, one who would bring peace and prosperity to the empire. This is the word the disciples used to announce the Good News of Jesus and His Kingdom—a very political statement at that time.

Read the words of Mary about the promise of her unborn son, or what Jesus attributed to Himself from the words of Isaiah. Our vision is that of the coming Kingdom of God where justice and peace embrace, where people are truly liberated and set free, were the poor find the resources they need, the vulnerable are defended and protected, where forgiveness and reconciliation are practiced, where joy is realized and shalom known. Grace, mercy and peace: these are what the gospel offers. Is this what our neighbours hear in our conversations with them?

Is our first foot forward an expression of peace, or of condemnation? Perhaps when we lived in Christendom, treating others as backslidden made some sense. They had strayed from that which they once believed and practiced, and we call them back. In today’s Canada there is a generation of young adults who have never been to church, have not once believed. To rebuke them makes no sense, particularly to them.

Expressing what we are for When we engage in conversations about difficult issues or when we are asked our opinion about current affairs, is our first response one of love and hope; an expression of a desire for something different? Or do we offer words of condemnation and judgment? Jesus said He came not to condemn the world, but to save it. If Jesus did not condemn, why is it that we so often choose to?

We should also be mindful of the language we use when describing people with whom we disagree. In Jude we read that when the angel Michael wrestled with the devil, he did not call him names but simply rebuked him. Who are we when disagreeing with others to presume to demean them with insults and name-calling?

Try this the next time someone raises an issue and defends a point of view with which you disagree. First, welcome the conversation and ask them a few more questions to understand the good they are seeking to defend or promote, or the perceived injustice they are naming. More often than not, there will be something, a desire, or a sentiment with which you can agree. Affirm what you can affirm and then describe a scenario in which that thing can be realized, but in the context of a biblical vision of life.

Our gospel is about righting wrongs, fighting injustice, caring for the vulnerable, healing the sick, mending the brokenhearted, and offering forgiveness. We are citizens of a Kingdom that is coming, but not yet fully come. Our lives are to give expression of what the Kingdom of God will be like. We have a positive alternative to demonstrate and explain.

I have found in Ottawa that this approach, presenting a respectful and well-reasoned argument that offers a positive alternative to resolving the issue has meant that we have been invited to be witnesses before committees and have been granted status before the courts over and over again.

Let’s be the Good News people; in our speech, and in our actions. While others may frame us as those who oppose their understanding of freedom, let us respond with the peace, grace and mercy that Paul always wished upon the early Church.

Yes, we will oppose various trends or initiatives. However, we do so out of a positive vision of what life can be like, offering an alternative interpretation that will be good news. Let our first words be about what we are for, because it is all about good news for all people.

Bruce Clemenger is president of the Evangelical Fellowship of Canada.

He and his wife Tracey raise their two daughters in the Ottawa Valley.

seven – issue twenty-nine march – april, 2013 page 19

features There were two churches in the village where I spent my teenage years, one on Church Street and the other on Main Street. To any tourist passing through our little town they would have looked almost identical, these modest wood-framed buildings with stained-glass windows and tin-clad steeples.

When the church bells clanged on Sunday mornings and the roadsides near the churches filled with parked cars, when well-scrubbed families filed through the double doors and organ music wafted from the windows, an outsider could be forgiven for imagining that these two congregations were labouring and worshiping in synchronicity.

But we knew better. Our church, the one on Church Street, was faithful to the Bible. That was something we would NEVER say about the Other Church.

To be honest, we doubted that the townspeople who attended the Main Street church were actually Christians.

The denomination to which they belonged was obviously deluded on crucial points of doctrine, and some of their practices, we knew, were weird. In matters of religion, Those People spoke with a vocabulary and tone that were different from ours—not in ways that would be obvious to a reporter from The New York Times, perhaps, but as distinguishable to the practiced ear as a Scottish brogue or a Texas drawl.

Yes, we all lived in the same town and went to the same public schools and always said hello to each other in the post office. But underneath all of this small-town civility, we were like Shi’ites and Sunnis.

Our church belonged to a nondenominational denomination, a network of like-minded congregations that had survived the wreckage of a revival a few generations earlier.

Our churches, which were scattered over a radius of 300 miles or so, were in turn connected, albeit very loosely, with other churches in distant parts of the country and with missionaries around the world. These were the Christians we knew.

We “fellowshipped” with our spiritual relatives at regional youth camps and men’s retreats and mission conferences, or on visits to the Bible school from which most of our leaders had graduated. Our family would drive for several hours to attend one of these reunions, but never, as far as I recall, did we even think about walking two blocks to visit the Other Church.

Over time, even our denominational events became strained. Tensions were probably always present, but not until I was old enough to interpret the interactions of grownups did I start to see the signs of internecine strife: the strategic seating, the sidelong looks, the elliptical sermon references that bore no relation to the text.

And then there were the mysterious absences. We would arrive at an annual convocation to find that friends who had been fixtures at those gatherings for years had suddenly disappeared, without a word of explanation, as though they had never existed at all. Only later, when I was finally admitted into adult conversations, did I hear about the battles that had been waged for righteousness, and the casualties that our side (the right side, naturally) had sustained.

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The Other Church

Exploring the Diversity of God's Kingdom

By Nate Larkin

Photo by Debra Millet/DepositPhotos

features

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The Other Church

Here’s a staggering statistic: there are now approximately 41,000 Christian denominations in the world. That’s right, 41,000 separate and distinct groups of churches, each with its own organizational chart, its own doctrinal priorities, its own style.

This diversity is nothing new—nor, for that matter, is it necessarily bad. Archeologists and sociologists tell us that tribalism is universal among humans and practically as old as humanity itself. The Bible describes the children of Israel whom Moses led out of Egypt as a very diverse population—12 distinct tribes, each a collection of multiple clans—whose calling to be the people of God did not erase their tribal identities.

If you stop to think about it, you must admit that a monolithic and homogeneous Church could never reach a world population as culturally diverse as ours. In fact, no single church could be expected to reach all the various subgroups within, for example, just one typical high school. A gospel message phrased in a way that reaches a Geek might confuse a Jock and elude a Stoner altogether. That’s why it was so wonderful and miraculous that, when the Church was born on the Day of Pentecost, foreigners who had come to Jerusalem from the far corners of the Earth all heard the gospel, but each in his own language.

In employing the imagery of the human body, the New Testament makes the point that this living, breathing thing we call the Church is actually a very complicated organism whose various parts are different by design. Diversity makes it possible for the Church to adapt, to speak countless languages simultaneously, to identify and meet a whole spectrum of human needs. And whether we see it or not, the Bible insists that the Church is actually a unified spiritual entity, with “one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and father of us all,” and that it functions under the direction of one Head, Christ Himself.

Complications arise, according to the apostle Paul, whenever one organ in this body begins to regard the others with contempt. It is there, at the point where believers take so much pride in their God-given identity that they lose sight of their place within the larger whole, that they fall victim to a debilitating spiritual sickness.

The whole church suffers when this happens, and the mission and witness of the church suffer as well. The single characteristic that is supposed to mark us as Christ-followers is lost. “By this shall all men know that you are my disciples,” Jesus said, “That you love one another.”

After I left home, I wandered away from our little tribe and began to explore the larger world. At university, I discovered Church History, a subject I had never encountered before. Our denomination, after all, was less than 100 years old. Since we

seven – issue twenty-nine march – april, 2013 page 22

regarded our movement as a restoration of the New Testament Church, I had never paid any serious attention to the 19 centuries that had passed between the Day of Pentecost and the modern descent of the dove. Had the Holy Spirit been absent from the Earth during that time? Had Jesus, in abrogation of His explicit promise, forsaken His disciples for nearly two millenia?

Delving into the archives of the Christian faith, I was astonished to discover committed believers in every age and in every place where the gospel has travelled. Each of these Christfollowers was born into to a certain people-group and spoke a specific language. Each one inherited a set of cultural norms and an incomplete understanding of the physical world. All of them were surrounded by political realities and historical forces from which they could not escape. It is not at all surprising, therefore, that despite their common commitment to Christ, these believers ended up interpreting and articulating and applying the gospel in different ways. Of course they did!

It was especially humbling for me to trace my own Christian heritage. As it turns out, the movement in which I was raised did not emerge spontaneously from a vacuum, immaculately conceived by the Holy Spirit without any cultural influences.

Yes, I do believe the Holy Spirit was involved in the birth of our movement. But in the many generations prior to our revival, religious sincerity regularly mated with socioeconomic factors, military and political realities, racial biases, and even, at times, naked ambition, to produce our progenitors. Eventually I came to believe that it was this half-forgotten and mostly unacknowledged genetic material, rather than theology alone, that made us unique.

Today, I live in a historic town in the American South, one with plenty of churches. Only 150 years ago, most of the white Christians in this town defended the institution of slavery on biblical grounds. Most of my neighbours still go to church.

People who grew up here tend to attend the church their parents attended, or one like it. Those of us who moved here from somewhere else typically look around for a church that speaks our worship-language, shares our cultural values, and endorses our political views—and it isn’t hard to find one that fits. There is a church for every taste in Franklin, Tennessee.

My wife Allie and I joined a church when we moved here 15 years ago. It’s a good church. We’re comfortable in our church home, and we are deeply engaged in ministry. More than that, we’re proud of our church. It is probably the best church in town.

At least that’s what I was thinking a few weeks ago when an unexpected e-mail suddenly arrived, an invitation to speak in another church just a few blocks from my house.

I had walked past this Other Church nearly every day for

Photo by Nadiia Gerbish/DepositPhotos Photo by James Steidl/DepositPhotos

15 years, but I had never so much as looked inside the building.

Frankly, I had no interest in looking inside. In my mind, the denomination to which this church belongs is deluded on crucial points of doctrine, and some of its practices are weird.

But when its new pastor, a likable young guy whom I’d met a few times at Starbucks, asked me to lead a weekend men’s retreat and then preach on Sunday morning, I didn’t have the heart to turn him down.

I finally entered the Other Church on a Friday, late in the afternoon, feeling like I was crossing into North Korea.

And what I found inside both shocked and humbled me.

Rather than foreigners, I found men like myself, flawed men who are aware of their sin and grateful for forgiveness, who are committed to their families and doing their level best to follow the Saviour. I didn’t know all of their songs or understand all of their jargon, but the Spirit among these men was unmistakable.

It felt like I’d arrived at a family reunion for the very first time, along with relatives I’d never met before. When the introductions were over and the initial awkwardness had passed, I found that we had an awful lot to talk about.

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Nate Larkin is the author of Samson and the Pirate Monks, Calling Men to Authentic Brotherhood, and Sundays Will Never Be the Same. A popular speaker at conferences and men's events, Nate lives with his wife Allie in Franklin, Tennessee.

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seven – issue twenty-nine march – april, 2013 page 23

HOW DO YOU TRANSFORM A LIFE? RESPONDING TO OUR BROKEN WORLD WITH THE HEART OF GOD Did you know that more than a billion people worldwide live on less than $1/day? When you move up to the official global poverty line of $2/day, that number increases to almost 3 billion people!

This world’s brokenness, however, goes much deeper than how little one has to live on. The root causes and consequences – corruption, injustice, suffering, greed and despair – speak to our collective need for a Saviour.

AS CHRISTIANS, WHAT SHOULD OUR RESPONSE BE? HOW DO WE REACH OUT TO A MASS OF GLOBAL HURT AND MAKE A DIFFERENCE? EduDeo Ministries – a Canadian, Christian mission organization – believes that children are key to transformation. They are the leaders of tomorrow – the next generation of doctors, teachers, presidents, mechanics, mothers and fathers.

Even more significant is the fact that there are an estimated 1.1 billion children who do not know Christ, with Barna Research showing only a 7% chance that they will come to know Him after the age of 14. Children are where it’s at.

SO HOW DO WE IMPACT CHILDREN FOR CHRIST? Education is proven to be one of the most powerful instruments for reducing poverty and inequality and lays a foundation for sustained economic growth. The World Bank states that, "Among human capital investments, education stands out as critically linked to poverty reduction and improved productivity." It directly affects and improves health, economy and society. Each additional year often translates in 10% higher wages!

Educated individuals make informed choices and have been proven to have healthier children because of the choices they make.

72 million primary school age children are currently NOT in school worldwide.

And these numbers are much lower than the reality, since many students who are enrolled do not attend for a variety of reasons. They live too far away, need to work to help support their family, or they can’t afford required school supplies and uniforms.

Even those who are able to attend school often receive a poor education.

Their classrooms are overcrowded, their teachers are under-qualified, and their schools lack adequate supplies, resources and facilities.

In response, EduDeo Ministries focuses on advancing Christ-centred education in developing countries. A quality education, integrated with the message of Gospel, has the power to transform lives both now and for eternity!

EduDeo strategically partners with indigenous-led school associations and international mission organizations in places including Belize, Benin, the Dominican Republic, Ethiopia, Ghana, Nicaragua, Niger, South Africa, South Sudan and Zambia. We fund scholarships for vulnerable students, come alongside their teachers through key training workshops and mentorship, and ensure a clean and safe learning environment by helping to build essential classrooms and facilities.

WHAT CAN YOU DO? Get Inspired: Read true stories of transformation that are happening in the lives of students and teachers around the world because of Christian education at edudeo.com/get-inspired

Give: Become a monthly Sponsor of the ministry of EduDeo in a specific country. Enroll at edudeo.com/sponsorship Go: Sign up for a short-term HANDS mission trip to help with a school construction project and to be blessed by experiencing part of the body of Christ in another culture. Learn more at edudeo.com/hands

sports scene

features

Leaning on faith Vancouver Canuck Dan Hamhuis looks on the bright side

by Scott Taylor

For Dan Hamhuis of the Vancouver Canucks, the recent National Hockey League lockout was at times confusing and often maddening. However, the 30year-old defenceman from Smithers, B.C., never lost sight of the benefits.

The benefits? That’s right. The benefits.

While the lockout certainly hurt fans, arena employees, broadcasters, street vendors and many players, it didn’t hurt the father of three who has developed a strong combination of commitment to family and faith in Jesus Christ.

For Hamhuis, the 113-day lockout wasn’t as bad as one might expect.

“Right from the start, I just tried to make the best of the whole situation,” says Hamhuis, a former star with Team Canada’s national junior team, who was drafted by the Nashville Predators in 2001.

“We just had a baby in June so we’ve had a very busy household and with the lockout on, I took advantage of the time off to spend as much of it as possible with my family. I’ve long believed that God has a plan for everything, so I felt quite at ease, sort of at peace, really. I took the time to take stock a bit and do the things that were important to me and my family.”

Although he isn’t a household name like Crosby, Ovechkin or Stamkos, Hamhuis is still a very good hockey player.

He’s starting his ninth season in the NHL, his third in Vancouver, and last year he had four goals and 33 assists and was a team-best plus-29 while playing the point for the Canucks.

He’s played in seven international tournaments (where he has won four medals) at both the junior and senior

level, was the top defenceman in the CHL in 2001 and played in the Stanley Cup final in 2011. Since he went away to play junior hockey at age 15, he’s probably spent more time in or around hockey arenas than he has anywhere else.

However, in recent years, he’s also found the time to come back to his faith.

“I grew up in a Christian home, in the Christian Reformed Church,” says Hamhuis. “I went off to Prince George to play junior and that was a challenging time for my faith, but there was a great pastor in the church in Prince George and he helped a lot.

“But it was my first year in Milwaukee (American Hockey League) that was a really difficult time for me. I’d just been cut by the Predators and I was living on my own for the first time and it was a challenging time. But we had a great chaplain in Milwaukee, Iggy Cafaro. He challenged me to really understand my faith. He really encouraged me to dig deeper.”

When he got back up to the NHL the Predators chaplain Pike Williams in Nashville was instrumental in his ongoing faith journey. Now in Vancouver, Hamhuis and his wife Sarah not only have a home church, but they spent many hours together during the lockout, getting even deeper into their faith.

“Sarah and I work with a number of community groups and during the lockout we took part in weekly sermon studies,” he says. “We’d get together with other members of the church on Tuesday nights and break down Sunday’s sermon and study the Bible. It gave both Sarah and I a great opportunity to really get something out of our faith.

“I have so many opportunities here in Vancouver. Being with the Canucks, working with chaplain Dave Klassen has made my faith a lot stronger. He’s helped me understand my life even more.”

Now that the lockout is over, it’s back to work for Hamhuis and his Canucks teammates. However, it’s not like they haven’t been working hard already.

“All the guys are starting to arrive in town and you can feel the pace of our regular practice sessions getting more intense every day,” Hamhuis says. “It’s been a long time since I’ve played a hockey game. You get a renewed appreciation for how important the game is to you when you’ve been away so long.”

For many NHLers, the stress of the lockout took its toll. You could tell it wasn’t easy for a lot of the guys simply from the radio and TV comments, the Tweets and Facebook messages.

But for Dan Hamhuis, at least, the 17week lockout experience wasn’t too bad at all, thanks to his family and his faith.

Scott Taylor is a Winnipeg-based sportswriter and broadcaster.

seven – issue twenty-nine march – april, 2013 page 25

money matters

Don’t stop thinking about tomorrow Why waste a single moment on unnecessary worries about your family’s future?

by Karen Bjerland

In 1977, the rock group Fleetwood Mac released the song “Don’t Stop,” which peaked at number three on the music charts that year. In 1992, U.S. presidential candidate Bill Clinton used this popular song as the theme for his first campaign. At the 2000 Democratic National Convention, Clinton ended his speech by saying, “Keep putting people first. Keep building those bridges, and don’t stop thinking about tomorrow!”

We may not agree with everything Clinton said but he was certainly right about putting others first and thinking about tomorrow.

The Apostle Paul encouraged the Christians in Philippi to love each other in humility. In Philippians 2:3-4 he said, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.”

Guard future interests If you don’t have life insurance to guard the interest of your family, they could be at risk if something happens to you. Dying does not create a need for insurance, but the result of death does.

Life insurance exists to provide money you or your family do not have when a breadwinner’s income stops. If no one is relying on your financial support, then you have no life insurance needs—but you may want to consider some life insurance wants.

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Life insurance needs include: • Buying loved ones time to grieve without financial stress • Maintaining stability—keeping your family at home, in their school and in their community • Providing an income stream to maintain your family’s standard of living • Paying off debt or loans • Pre-funding a child’s education • Keeping a family business “in the family” Life insurance wants include: • Creating an estate; • Wealth replacement; • Charitable giving.

Life insurance can do some amazing things for people so it’s a good idea to have your insurance needs reviewed regularly by your financial representative.

Clearly, the younger you are when you purchase a life insurance policy the more economical it will be for you. Not only will you and your family be covered for a longer period of time, but life insurance is more accessible in good health and the premiums stay lower.

Life insurance benefits include: • Immediate and tax-free coverage of final expenses • Protection for your heirs from taxes that can reach as high as 50 per cent of your estate • Development of cash value for future financial needs • Peace of mind knowing your family is protected from financial trouble if you are gone When thinking about tomorrow it’s important to remain balanced—knowing that ultimately it is God who takes care of us and the big picture surrounding our loved ones. He knows the plans that He has for us and we are to trust in Him. “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself…” (Matthew 6:34).

Thinking about tomorrow and planning to guard the interest of your family doesn’t mean you are being anxious. In fact, life insurance is really about “living” without wasting a single moment on unnecessary worries about your family’s future. Have you thought enough about tomorrow?

Karen Bjerland is the president and CEO of FaithLife Financial.

Out of my depth

Shaking off the dust How do we live as true neighbours in a tolerant society?

by Phil Wagler

We are relatively new to our neighbourhood. We’re surrounded by great people with rich and varied stories—and I know very few of them. It takes time. It takes vulnerability. It takes consistency to know strangers— even strangers nearby—to the point where they will crack open not only their door, but their worldview.

A family in our neighbourhood has been through tough stuff. I am not privy to many of the details, but it’s a second marriage and their kids—when they’re around every other weekend—often pop by to play with our children. Occasionally the dad and I stop long enough to get beyond the obligatory “How ya doing?” and hand wave.

It was after a number of months of these interactions that I took the chance. I thought I had earned the right in the relationship. I felt free to take a step into the unknown: I told him we’d be happy to take their kids to church with us if they’d like.

A new neighbour emerged. Not the one I knew only by face and vocation, but one who also had convictions—and they weren’t the same as mine. With straightforward clarity he made sure I understood they were atheist and there would be no tolerating of God-talk in their home. If the kids went to Sunday school it would open up unwanted questions.

Insert awkward silence, followed by a sharp turn back to chatting about the garden he was building. We were neighbours, sent back to our corners of tolerating each other like good Canadians next door from worlds apart.

How am I to relate to my neighbour in a nation that declares this: “We have developed a unique federal style of government that is based on compromise and co-existence” (www.durhamimmigration.ca). This system has helped shape a great part of the world to live—the desire of many— and that should not be taken for granted in the least. At the same time, it does bring some clarity to Marshall McLuhan’s insight, “Canada is the only country in the world that knows how to live without an identity.”

In other words, we’re quite comfortable with being out of touch with our depths, with compromise, and will tolerate lots because we don’t really know who we are. This generally eliminates any sense of public—or even neighbourly—discourse over things that matter deeply. We just don’t go there; and we’re fine with that. Consequently, like a baker trying to find a workable substitute when we’ve run out of eggs, into our awkward silences we throw in pseudoidentity markers and turn to debates about the Flames, Jets or Canadiens.

So, as a follower of Jesus—who I am convinced is Lord of all—do I just shake the dust off my feet because my neighbour is closed to the intrusion of God in his home? Is that what Jesus meant when He said to His disciples, “If anyone will not welcome you or listen to your words, leave that home or town and shake the dust off your feet” (Matthew 10:14)? If tolerance is the cultural water we swim in as a people, won’t shaking dust every time I encounter hard ground

simply create more of a desert-existence in the Great White North?

Jesus’ words are about welcome and hospitality. Does our neighbour slam the door in our face? Do they give us the one finger salute—or even worse nothing at all—instead of a wave? Well, then yes, don’t keep banging your head against the wall. However, if he keeps asking how you’re doing, if he is happy to chat about work and offers you a beer, well, then there remains a welcome. He is living by that value of tolerance that both allows for neighbourliness while running the risk of being utterly dismissive.

My neighbour knocks on my door. I open it and there he stands. He looks shaken and quickly reveals that a good friend has committed suicide. It hits close to home and neighbourliness takes on a new reality. We are not just neighbours tolerating one another’s hidden worldviews, we are men, flesh and blood, and we hurt. I tell him I will pray for him.

He is grateful for that and I try not to smile at the irony. I welcome him, grateful he has not shaken the dust off his feet in relating to me.

And I become more convinced that the only way past the shallow waters of tolerance is not arguments, but love; longsuffering, patient, deep love.

Phil Wagler is learning to love as a pastor and neighbour in the Lower Mainland of British Columbia. He is the author of Kingdom Culture: Growing the Missional Church.

seven – issue twenty-nine march – april, 2013 page 27

power play

Great games. Great toys.

Great gadgets.

Reviews by Sandy McMurray

BLACKBERRY Z10

HIP KEY

blackberry.com

hipKey is a tracking device that talks to your iPhone or iPad using a special app.

It’s designed for anyone who has ever misplaced a phone or a set of car keys.

Now you can use one to find the other, just by pressing a button. hipKey has four different functions: Find Me Mode: Can’t find your phone?

Press the Find Me button on the hipKey to trigger an alarm on your iOS device. Can’t find your keys? Press the Find Me button in the app on your iPhone to make the hipKey beep.

Motion Mode: Attach the hipKey to any item you want to protect. An alarm on your iOS device will notify you if the item moves.

Alarm Mode: hipKey alerts you immediately when you become separated from your iOS device. This is especially useful for travellers who tend to leave things behind on airplanes or in hotel rooms. You can set Safety Zone exceptions, so the alarm will not sound in some locations. For example, set your home as a Safety Zone so the alarm won’t sound when you go out for a walk with your keys and leave your phone behind.

Child Mode: Use your hipKey to keep track of your child in public places. If they move out of range, an alarm sounds to let you know.

TV remote controls should come with this kind of tracker.

The new BlackBerry Z10 is the first smart phone from a rebranded and revived BlackBerry (formerly Research In Motion). The Z10 features a big touch screen, a keyboard that predicts what you want to type, impressive camera software, and new tools to help customers separate work and personal items on the phone.

The on-screen keyboard suggests words as you type, so you can save keystrokes by flicking the right words onto the screen. (BlackBerry fans who prefer actual keys can buy the new Q10 model instead, with its smaller screen and hardware keyboard.)

BlackBerry Messenger now has video calling in addition to texting, as well as a new Screen Share feature that lets other BlackBerry 10 users see what’s on your screen.

The camera software has a feature called Time Shift that snaps a bunch of pictures when you tap the screen. You can then pick the best one by moving a dial on the screen to go forward or backward in time.

BlackBerry Z10 also makes it easy to separate work from home by creating a separate profile for each one on the phone. I.T. can manage your work accounts and you can control your personal data.

The new Z10 is available from Canadian carriers for about $150 on a three-year plan.

seven – issue twenty-nine march – april, 2013 page 28

hippih.com

was done he wiped the sweat off his face then scrubbed his hands with gasoline or turpentine before rinsing them in the rain barrel by the barn. (He then roasted a whole cow for supper and slept soundly on a bed made of bear skins. At least, that’s how I remember it.)

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ManHands soap is handmade and costs about six dollars per man-sized bar.

If that seems expensive to you, consider the price of gasoline.

BIG AS ALL OUTDOORS cseed.tv

MANHANDS SOAP etsy.com

My grandfather never washed his hands with lavender, coconut, or mangoscented soap. No sir! When his work

The promotional video for the C SEED TV is both awesome and ridiculous. Here’s how it goes: a handsome man parks his expensive car in front of a mansion. He grabs a bottle of champagne from the kitchen then goes out to the back yard.

There he finds a woman, sitting on a couch, waiting for his arrival.

power play

He sits next to her then presses a button on a remote control. A hidden panel opens in the ground, revealing a large column that rises from the lawn into the air. The column unfolds to reveal the world’s largest television: a 201-inch (5.11m) 16:9 LED screen made up of seven smaller LED panels.

Then they watch TV, outdoors, on a couch on a giant green lawn.

It’s not as impractical as it sounds.

When it’s not in use, the C SEED 201 folds up and retracts below ground, so you can still use the lawn to play badminton or polo or chess with people dressed as pawns. The TV lurks below ground in its water-resistant silo until the next time you need to impress someone.

This could be your TV. All you need is a fancy car, a mansion, a giant lawn and a deep hole in the ground. Oh, and about $15,000 for the TV (plus shipping and installation).

AS BIG AS THE HORIZON

Panasonic showed off a 20-inch tablet that weighs about five pounds.

The large screen is great for movies and games, and it can be propped up and used as a computer.

When you think of a tablet as a PC replacement, bigger does seem better, but how big is too big?

The winner of the “Best of CES” award in the PC and tablets category went to the super- sized IdeaCentre Horizon Table PC from Lenovo. This 27-inch touch screen can be used as an all-in-one Windows 8 computer, or you can use it as a tablet.

The large screen is perfect for multiplayer games, and supports interactive physical gaming accessories for touchscreen play among several players.

It can lie flat on any surface, which is handy because you almost need two people to move it anywhere.

The Horizon Table PC sells for about $1,700, so you might want to get a security deposit from your kids you let them carry it around the house.

lenovo.com

Tablets were big this year at the annual Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas. Some were bigger than others.

Although most new tablets have a seveninch or nine-inch screen, some of the new products on display were more table than tablet.

IRON MAN SHIRT thinkgeek.com

The Arc Reactor shirt from Think Geek looks like an ordinary T-shirt until you turn on the glowing light in the middle of the chest. Fans of Marvel Comics and The Avengers will then recognize that you’re

dressed as Tony Stark, Iron Man’s handsome and brilliant alter ego.

“The chest-mounted uni-beam is powered by photons, which it collects and then disperses when the wearer enters a dark area.” Spoiler alert: the light panel under the shirt is powered by a hidden battery pack, not an actual Arc Reactor. It does not contain enough juice to power a metal suit, and it won’t give you super powers. On the other hand, it lights up and looks cool and costs much less than a real Arc Reactor from Stark Enterprises.

The shirt is designed for up to two days of continuous use in Earth’s atmosphere. Note, however, that after 24 hours “it begins to act as a repulsor.”

LETHAL INGESTION HOT SAUCE amazon.com

Hot sauce connoisseurs give five stars to this deadly blend of Red Savina, Fatalii and Bhut Jolokia chiles. Cajohn’s Lethal Ingestion hot sauce proclaims itself to be the World’s Hottest NonExtract Hot Sauce.

A little bit goes a long way. One whiff burns off your nose hairs. One taste burns your tongue, but in a good way.

Lethal Ingestion packs a punch followed by a pure, non-chemical aftertaste that hot chill fans will appreciate.

Sandy McMurray writes about games, toys, and gadgets at funspot.ca

seven – issue twenty-nine march – april, 2013 page 29

What women want

Fight for your marriage Passive doesn’t equal peace

by Sheila Wray Gregoire

What are the magic words in marriage?

Some people try “I love you,” or “That dress makes you look so thin,” or my personal favourite, “Honey, I brought home chocolate.” But many guys think they’ve hit the relationship jackpot when they utter, “Anything you want is fine with me, honey.”

That sounds sacrificial and giving, but does it really bring magic? Imagine living with someone who gave you everything you want, all the time.

Okay, granted, maybe that does sound idyllic. But I think it would wear on most people after a while. You didn’t marry a robot; you married a person. A marriage where no one shares his or her opinions is awfully dull. It’s like a lifelong luncheon with your boss or with the older ladies from church. Everything’s all very polite, but there’s no heart.

And the heart of marriage is two very different people joining together. My husband will never understand what chartreuse is, and I will never understand the lure of shoot ‘em up video games.

The differences are hard-wired. And where there are differences, there will be conflict.

Aren’t we supposed to be gracious and giving in marriage? Of course!

However, there’s a difference between keeping the peace and making peace, and sometimes, if we’re too focused on former, we miss out on real peace.

Look at it this way: Egypt and Israel are technically at peace, but an Israeli walking in Cairo would likely feel even more uncomfortable than most males in a scrapbooking store.

Germany and Great Britain, on the other hand, were once mortal enemies but are now great friends. They’re part of the same political union. They share

seven – issue twenty-nine march – april, 2013 page 30

business and culture and trade.

Hopefully in your marriage you can find oneness without needing to resort to blitzkrieg or carpet bombing, but sometimes pushing through our issues is exactly what is needed.

Jesus told us to be peacemakers, not peacekeepers. A peacekeeper stands around with a gun and stares people down if they make a move. He maintains the status quo. He doesn’t rock the boat.

A peacemaker, on the other hand, is someone who strives to create true intimacy. You don’t want to just live in a house where no one is killing each other; you want to live in a house where you feel like you’re one with your wife— united in mind and thought. That means if tension comes up, you face it head on.

Let’s say she feels upset because you bought her bubble bath for the third anniversary in a row, and she thinks you have the romantic quotient of a slug. You, on the other hand, think she doesn’t appreciate what you do for the family.

She starts crying, “You never put any effort in. Everything else gets your attention but me!” What’s the loving thing to do now? Some guys give up there, grunt and leave the room. Others launch into a full-blown defense, listing every nice thing they’ve ever done, before retreating in anger.

Neither approach really works because you still end angry. Talking through why she feels unloved—even if it makes you uncomfortable—can open doors to you sharing how you sometimes feel neglected. Listening and then repeating what was said back to each other, acknowledging the feelings, and then looking for solutions is much easier if we don’t run scared every time there’s a disagreement.

Some problems, though, aren’t solved with conversation alone. She spends money too freely, and you’re worried about the budget bottom line. Your credit card bills are running up, and she doesn’t want to control her spending.

Perhaps you’ve found out she’s texting a co-worker. Maybe she’s been so hurt in the past that she has shut down sexually.

You’ve talked with her about these things but she has no interest in addressing them. What do you do?

The Bible talks at length about how to confront people who sinning, specifically in Matthew 18. You go to them first, and if they don’t listen, you bring two or three others along. If your wife is involved in something that cannot be tolerated— either because it endangers her own spiritual life or because it endangers the marriage—you need to get some help, either from a pastor, a counsellor, or a mentor couple. Yes, it may make your wife uncomfortable, and yes, things may feel worse for a while. But the only way through to the other side is often to go through the hard work of confronting sin.

Sure, some things we let go. But saying, “it’s no big deal,” or even excusing sin isn’t going to build peace in your marriage. If there’s something huge in your marriage that will only get worse, saying nothing and letting it fester won’t create intimacy; it will build walls.

It’s your choice. Are you going to fight for peace, or are you going to settle for a lack of conflict? Sometimes, to find real peace, you have to fight.

Sheila is a speaker and author of The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex. She blogs everyday at tolovehonorandvacuum.com.

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