popular STAND 52

issue

52

a fanzine for the likes of Doncaster

Yes, even after all these years its really, truly, genuinely still only ÂŁ1

Royal Wedding Plans Dealt Tragic Blow

Also in this issue: The Upcoming Royal Wedding; Is the hype being manipulated just to sell fanzines?

Meet the Board: Popular Stand; issue 52...

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1. Editor: Mr Glen Wilson 2. Mr Ray Jest

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3. Mr. Chris Kidd 4. Mr. Matt Clift

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5. Mr. Mike Follows 6. Mr. Brian Witherden

7. Mr. Tom Biltcliffe 8. Lord John Coyle

Not pictured: Mr. Dave Plant (incatrek) and Mr. Dave Thomas (printer extraordinaire)

Have your Say

Disclaimer

If you wish to get in touch with the fanzine, whether you wish to complain, praise us (we can hope) or you want to join the team then please email us at vivarovers@hotmail.com.

Please title your email‘Popular Stand’.

Spot Any Mistakes?

We’ve made a few, but then again hopefully too few to mention. Ultimately we did what we had to do and saw it through without exemption. We planned each chartered paragraph, each careful word along the margin. But more, much more than this.

We’ve spelt words our way.

Next Issue The next issue of the fanzine will be on sale at the first home game of next season.

Deadline for content submissions is to be confirmed, though we will endeavour to make it known via facebook and forums.

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The articles contained within Popular Stand are the views of the individual contributor and not necessarily those of the editor.

Popular Stand is an independent publication produce by the fans for the fans. It is not associated in any official capacity with Doncaster Rovers FC, the Keepmoat Stadium, the Viking Supporters Co-operative, the FSF or the Football League.

More importantly it is also not associated with Piers Morgan, Simon Cowell, those two smug pillocks who present Masterchef, Scunthorpe United, Nick Clegg, Kerry Katona or The Only Way is Essex.

Some of the articles contained within may be of satirical nature, but we refuse to add little winky faces which you may find on an internet messageboard and so you’ll have to fathom out which ones, if any, for yourself. Please note that your browsing of this fanzine may be recorded for training purposes. Any unauthorised copying, hiring or public performance of this fanzine is illegal. Well, it’s not strictly, but it would be frowned upon. If you want to convert to a mime interpretation though be our guests.

POPULAR STAND; a football fanzine for the likes of Doncaster

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Issue 52; Editorial...

Friends, Rovers, Doncastrians, As you may have seen on the VSC forum or on Twitter, or read on the excellent Viva Rovers website, Nathan and Lucy have taken the decision to step down as editors of Popular Stand fanzine. It wasn’t an easy decision for them to make, but eventually my prolonged phone-tapping and blackmail fuelled smear campaign proved successful.

Subsequently they have handed running of the fanzine over to me and after they promised not to go to the police, I returned their dog with three of its paws still intact.

Don’t worry, I am obviously joking. They don’t have a dog.

Hopefully the A5 sized hole in your life for the past few months means you’ll be aware Popular Stand has been noticeable by its absence this season. We put out an issue back in August, but unfortunately Nathan and Lucy’s commitment to their other jobs and responsibilities have meant they have been unable to devote time to the‘zine since then. Not wanting to see Popular Stand fall by the wayside after all the effort Nathan and Lucy have put in to keep it going all these years I got in touch with Nath last month to offer my services as a Caretaker Editor (a bit like a normal editor, only with a massive bunch of keys and a huge barrel of sawdust on hand to cover the vomit of over-excited contributors), an offer he duly accepted.

There is a school of thought that the days of print fanzines, such as this, are numbered.

Born in the 1980s and 90s to give fans a much needed voice, their necessity has been muted by the rise of the internet and subsequently the emergence of forums and message-boards. Indeed, why wait for the next copy-deadline when you can take out your vitriol on the keyboard before James Alexander Gordon has reached the Scottish Second Division? However, I still feel there is a need and a demand for the fanzine, for the considered take on the club rather than the reactionary statements framed by emoticons, and that’s why you have this copy of Popular Stand in your hands.

As with most football fanzines Popular Stand was born in a darker time, as a response and a mouthpiece against the twilight of Ken Richardson’s time. It’s in the nature of the genre that there is much more material for‘zines when times are hard. As such the achievements of Nathan and Lucy to keep this publication ticking over despite being afflicted by a prolonged period of overwhelming positivity in Rovers’fortunes should not be underappreciated. So, if, or perhaps more likely when, you next see them make sure you congratulate them for their time and effort in producing forty issues over the best part of a decade.

So to the present then and this current issue, which we had hoped to put out on the date of the last home game to allow for more reflection on the season gone. However, the Easter break and additional Royal Wedding holidays made that a near impossibility, and with the search for an Atheist-Republican Printers proving unsuccessful we are here

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on Good Friday instead. Long-time readers of Popular Stand will notice some familiar names amongst the contributors as on a mission from SOD, I have sought to bring members of the band back together and am delighted to report that all approached so far have accepted (Jack the Miner – you’re next!). The result is, the archetypal perfect blend of youth and experience, and though we’re yet to settle on a formation and haven’t practiced set-pieces I think you’ll be happy with what we’ve produced.

The initial copy deadline for this issue was Friday 15th April therefore everything you read in these pages was submitted without secure knowledge of which division Rovers will be in next season. As such, it’s interesting (and reassuring) to note the distinct lack of panic or concern in the tone of the content. Hopefully we haven’t been made to look foolishly bullish by the time you read this.

Enjoy this issue and what remains of the season, and please feel free to give feedback you have on this my first attempt at editing the‘zine. Viva Rovers!

Glen Wilson

INCATREK by Dave Plant On 5th June this year three Doncaster Rovers players Mark Wilson, James Coppinger and James O’Connor, plus four members of club staff; Sports Scientist Ross Burbeary, Performance Analyst Paul Fernie, Community Participation Manager Liam Scully and Media Manager Steve Uttley along with Paul Mayfield, Chairman of the Doncaster Rovers Supporters’Club - Retford Branch, Managing Director of Moirae Ltd, David Plant and Director of Ideal Financial Management, Brian Butcher are taking a Challenge to the limit. In fact, the sky is the limit.

This intrepid bunch of football adventurers are going to be scaling the Andes to the Inca Trail, at high altitudes of over 15,000ft, as they plan to walk over 62 miles of rugged terrain on the roof of South America. Altitude sickness is ever present at these heights , so trekking over 62 miles in six days will be no piece of cake.

Mark Wilson explains;“We are doing this challenging trek to raise awareness of the NSPCC and Childline, helping to raise funds to allow them to run this vital service. I have wanted to do something like this for a few years, as it’s close to my heart, especially with all the high profile child abuse cases that have been in the news. I wanted to do something to help prevent and put a stop to child abuse so this is where the idea came from.”

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POPULAR STAND; a football fanzine for the likes of Doncaster

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In partnership with Inca Trek there is a number of additional fundraising events including;

All Stars v Doncaster Teachers Thursday 5th May A mixed team made up of ex-footballers and celebrities will be playing a match against teachers from Doncaster’s schools.

More details will be announced soon via the official DRFC website and match day programme.

Tickets priced at £4 for Adults & £1 for concessions.

Ardagh Group Doncaster Business Cup Saturday 14th May Two leading business heads in Doncaster have come together to create the first charity ‘Business Cup’which will be played at The Keepmoat Stadium. Andrew Isaacs and David Plant are raising funds for the Rovers Inca Trek campaign which aims to raise £50,000 for the NSPCC over the next 12 months.

Mark Wilson and James Coppinger will assist on match-day, providing support for both teams, as they compete to get their hands on the first annual Ardagh Group Doncaster Business Cup. Tickets for the charity football game at The Keepmoat Stadium on Saturday 14th May are priced at £3 for adults, £2 for kids. They can be purchased by contacting David Plant of Moirae Ltd on 01302 511991

Charity Golf Day Tuesday 17th May

Help the NSPCC Give Every Child a Voice It costs the NSPCC £4 to answer every call to ChildLine and £10 for every call to the NSPCC Helpline. Every call answered could save a child’s life. Currently, Childline is not able to answer all of the calls they receive and are desperately concerned for children who are not able to get through to them. This is where the Child’s Voice Appeal will help.

With the Child’s Voice Appeal, the NSPCC want to transform ChildLine and their own HelpLine to answer many more children’s cries for help. So that there will always be someone there to listen and help. To make this happen, the Government is providing £30 million and the NSPCC need to raise a further £50 million – so they need your help!

Your money will help the NSPCC to increase their call answer rate and talk to 90 per cent of the calls they receive every year from children.

They also want to be able to pick up the phone to 80 per cent of the people who contact them on the adult helpline. Crucially, the NSPCC will expand their email and text counselling services so there will be more ways for children to get in contact with them.

Text to Donate We are pleased to announce the launch of our txt to donate number which will be active from today’s Crystal Palace game.

Please txt the word“Inca”to 70991 to donate £1 Messages cost £1 plus standard message rate* *a minimum of 94p (o2/vodafone), 87p (orange/virgin) 70p (t-mobile) and 92p (3) will go directly to this cause.

Register for 2.30pm with a 3pm Shotgun start for 18 holes. A team of four is £160 which includes a 2 course meal, raffle, auction and Q&A with Rovers players. There is also the chance to advertise by sponsoring a prize for £60, sponsoring a tee for £30 or by donating raffle and/or auction prizes.

For full details of the Inca Trek, further opportunites to donate and information on all related fundraising activities visit the website dedicated to the drive; www.roversincatrek.co.uk

POPULAR STAND; a football fanzine for the likes of Doncaster

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To Lindum and Back Welcome in Phil Brown, you have just been inducted into the‘Steve Cotterill Dickhead Managers in Football’Hall of Fame. Another emphatic display of how not to behave on the touchline – I think offering the referee out numerous times and running on the pitch do more than enough to justify a place alongside such favourites as Warnock, Calderwood and Blackwell; and we haven’t even touched on the‘tan’.

I want to see a young Darren Moore when I look at Wayne Thomas, after all everything is there, physique and err.... he’s a centre half. Unfortunately it’s not happening and thankfully Shelton Martis and George Friend are our latest pairing in

“For the last time... I am not Wayne Thomas.

Thats what he said and look what happened to hIm”

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the middle of the chocolate shield we call our defence. The first thing we have learnt from this season is we don’t have the strength in depth required to compete in the top half of this league and that I am sure will be addressed as much as sustainably possible in the summer. On a better note, Muzzy must be one of the finds of the generation, plucked out of non league, given some TLC by the coaching team and hey presto you’ve got an explosive Championship full back. For me, Muzzy getting injured when he did is one of the most disappointing things this season.

On the odd Saturday I haven’t travelled to watch Rovers playing away I have made the short journey along the A57 and dropped in at Gainsborough. Allow me to explain; nowadays I live in Lincoln and have seen a good dollop of Trinity over the years. Most recently I saw Jan Budtz playing for Stalybridge Celtic - Manchester City shootout hero to Stalybridge keeping a zero against Gainsborough. How on earth did that go so wrong? What keeps me going back is the‘grass roots’feel on a match day. The best pie, chips and mushy peas for £1.50, getting in for a tenner and the one man and his dog in the corner is just brilliant and sorely missed from the redundant terraces of pre 2000’s football.

The Northolme is far removed from the sterilised temple we watch our football in these days, now and again it’s nice just to go back and feel how football was and really should still be.

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Whilst travelling back to Lincoln after the QPR game it was brilliant to hear an Owl losing his marbles on the 606 phone in which Robbie Savage co-hosts.

At first I thought it was a bad hangover from Football Heaven but then Robbie’s dulcet tones reminded me this was being broadcast to a national audience. Great to hear how those in Sheffield are struggling to get to grips with the fact Barnsley and Rovers will be a league higher next season and quite honestly I can’t see how they will re-join us any time soon. For any Owls and Blades reading – I would really appreciate a ground report on the B2NET Stadium as well as the Don Valley having never had the chance to visit.

Player of the season should be an interesting award this time around, without looking at the stats there won’t be many guys who have player over 30 games this season. One man over the threshold is that man with the key to the net and until his season was again cut short due to injury he had managed to battle and find 16 onions

for his bag, oh Billy, how I hope we still have the pleasure of setting eyes on you in August.

Last word goes to a young footballer who had to retire not too long ago. He played around eighty times for the Rovers, in every appearance giving 100% in determination, effort and fight for the team.

In his pomp I expected to see him as Rovers regular left back for many years to come. This is to you Sean McDaid, the epitome of what everyone wanted to see in a footballer pulling on the shirt of the club. I am sure he will be a great asset to a club somewhere in a coaching capacity or indeed whatever it is he decides to do, it was great to see him back.

Let’s hope for a summer of health and fitness for our lads, next season can’t be half as bad injury wise as it has been this term. It’s been another great effort by Rovers, although we will finish lower, it is still a step forward. We’re established.

POPULAR STAND; a football fanzine for the likes of Doncaster

CJK

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Bradford Exile’s Season In Retrospect 1968-69...

The 1968/1969 season was one in which many fans were hopeful of promotion, and the Rovers were not about to disappoint.

The first two games against Bradford City (home) and York City (away) both produced 1-1 draws. The next match however, at home to old rivals Scunthorpe, produced a real cracker in which Rovers, after being 2-0 down, came back to win 4-3 inspired by 2 goals from Alick Jeffrey. This was followed by a 2-1 win over Colchester United to put Rovers eighth in Division 4.

Rovers travelled to Chester for their next game and suffered their first loss, a 2-1 reversal which saw them drop to 9th.

However, September saw Rovers go on an impressive run of 5 wins from 5 games.

Starting with Exeter at home (3-1) with Jeffrey scoring a hat trick, they then overcame Port Vale (away) 2-0, Rochdale (home) 2-0, Peterborough (home) 1-0 and Chesterfield (away) 1-0. As a result Rovers had now climbed to the dizzy heights of 2nd in the league, and the stage was set for a top of the table clash with leaders Darlington.

The game will probably be remembered for three reasons; firstly Rovers lost their undefeated home record; secondly, the record attendance of 22,268, and finally the substitution of Rovers’Centre Forward John Regan who showed his annoyance at the

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decision. With Chester winning 3-0 at Swansea on the same day Rovers dropped to 3rd place.

In the next home game Rovers were to entertain Chester; Regan, reinstated to first team duty, got off to a flying start and put Rovers 2 up within the first twenty minutes.

With further goals from Jeffrey (pen) and Rabjohn Rovers at 4-0 were coasting, but Chester hit back, scoring three goals in the last twenty minutes to have the Rovers faithful biting their fingernails to the end. They held on though and the win meant Rovers leapfrogged Chester back into 2nd spot.

A 3-1 loss at Wrexham followed, but home victory over Bradford Park Avenue kept Doncaster in the top three. However, an indifferent run of games which brought one draw and 3 defeats had the fans wondering whether the bubble had burst. Losses at Halifax (4-1) Lincoln (2-0) and Southend (2-0) were only offset by a 0-0 draw at home to Swansea.

(Rovers Manager: George Raynor)

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Thankfully fortunes would pick up in the following matches as Rovers gained 2-1 victories at Aldershot and at home to Grimsby followed by a goalless draw against Wrexham. It was during this time that George Raynor, Doncaster’s Manager, stepped down from his position. Lawrie McMenemy was appointed in his place and he was in the stands for the 2-1 win over Grimsby Town A 2-1 defeat at Bradford Park Avenue would be a last low for some time as it was followed by a run of 24 League games during which the Rovers lost only once. It was this run that was to ultimately see them clinch the 4th Division title.

The run started with three draws; 0-0 away to Darlington, 1-1 at Lincoln City and a goalless draw at home to Halifax. Although Rovers’ form had been somewhat indifferent, after the draw with Halifax they were still lying 5th in the league and well in touch with the leaders Aldershot. Manager Lawrie McMenemy then took most people by surprise when he re-signed former Rovers favourite Graham Watson from Rotherham. Watson had, in many people’s eyes, been the pretender to the crown worn for so long by Alick Jeffrey.

(Top scorer: Alick Jeffrey)

yet at the end of this Championship winning campaign he was still the clubs leading scorer. Even today many fans remember Lawrie McMenemy for one reason only and that is showing Alick the door at Belle Vue. Two successive draws followed, 1-1 at Notts County, and 2-2 at home to Newport County to set up a meeting of the division’s top two.

As with earlier in the season when they had faced Darlington, Rovers knew that a win would take them into top spot, however to make that happen Rovers had to win by 6 clear goals to overtake Aldershot at the top.

Following wins against Southend (2-0 at home) and Swansea (1-0 away) Rovers moved into 2nd place in the division.

However, Rovers had played the game at Swansea without Alick Jeffrey, McMenemy having sensationally transferred the forward to local rivals Lincoln City. It was a move that caught the nation’s attention. Articles about Alick were written by the most astute of reporters, and it seemed that the whole town mourned as one his departure. It says much that Alick’s departure came in January and POPULAR STAND; a football fanzine for the likes of Doncaster

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Unlike the previous top two clash Rovers were in no mood to let this opportunity slip through their fingers. Three nil up at half time Doncaster tore into the visitors in the second half and duly won the match 7-0, a score that placed them firmly at the top of the division.

It was a position they would not surrender for the rest of the season.

Eight games were played during March, with Rovers remaining undefeated throughout.

Victories over York, Scunthorpe and Colchester were coupled with a home draw with Notts County and four stalemates on the road at Bradford City, Newport County, Workington and Exeter. Rovers form continued into April with home wins over Brentford (5-0) and Port Vale (2-0) plus a 1-0 win at Peterborough (1-0). Doncaster also secured three goalless draws at home to Chesterfield and Workington and away at Rochdale. The only black spot of the run in came at Brentford; The Bees beating Rovers 1-0 at Griffin Park. Rover’s final league game was played away at Grimsby Town and resulted in a 3-1 victory to secure the

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Championship, won by two points from Halifax Town.

The cup competitions would be remembered for Rovers winning through to face the might of Liverpool in the FA Cup. In the 1st round a late Jeffrey strike had defeated Notts County at Belle Vue to set up a second round home tie with Southport. Regan gave the Rovers a first half lead after 37 minutes only for Andrews to level the scores for Southport.

However, three minutes from the end Regan soared above the Southport defence to head home the winner and set up a match of a lifetime for many of the Rovers players and fans. The match at Anfield saw Liverpool run out winners by 2-0, but Rovers had made them fight all the way for their victory.

There was some Cup glory to be had though.

The beginning of the season had seen the Rovers beat Barnsley by 1-0 at Belle Vue to win the Sheffield County Cup. This final had been held over from the previous season and it saw Rovers become holders of the trophy for the fourth time in their history.

POPULAR STAND; a football fanzine for the likes of Doncaster

RJ

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the Doncaster Comet exclusives from Seth Prozack

Rotherham United’s Homecoming Heartache Millers Return Home to Discover Town Has Found New Team There was a huge shock for Rotherham United after they announced plans to return home. The Millers, who have been playing home games at Don Valley Stadium after a protracted dispute with the owners at former ground Millmoor, were all set to end their exile at Sheffield. However, much to their shock Rotherham United returned home to find that their town had found another football club in their absence. The town claimed that they had presumed United had passed away they’d been gone so long and felt it best to move on as that’s what the Millers would’ve wanted. The town insisted to Rotherham United that if they really cared they would go away again, pointing out that their children had become used to the new club and the truth would hurt them too much. After a protracted argument on the doorstep the town of Rotherham agreed to refer to the old club as Uncle Millers and allow them to visit once in a while so long as they didn’t cause a scene.

Championship is For Losers “All the Cool Kids Are in League One”Insist Sheffield’s Football Fans Supporters of Sheffield United have hit out at their counterparts from Doncaster, by claiming that football’s second tier is for squares. The Blades went on to add that they never wanted to be in the Championship anyway, because it smells, so there. Across the Steel City Wednesday fans fuelled the argument by claiming that the division above them was too obvious and too popular.

An Owls spokesman said;“As far as we’re concerned League One is the place to be, it’s not as mainstream as the Championship and that means it’s cool and trendy and stuff. We’ve got a Myspace page and everything”.

Away Kit Impairs Supporters’Vision Scunthorpe Change Strip is“Inhumanely Bright”insist Authorities Health Authorities have slammed Scunthorpe United’s horrific luminous yellow and black change strip, calling the abomination of a football shirt‘inhumanely bright’in a report commission by football supporters’groups. At least a dozen supporters have claimed of still being able to see horizontal glowing lines across their vision, hours after watching the Iron play away from home.

With this figure representing 80% of Scunny’s support the authorities had no option but to act. A spokesman said“The situation really is terrible, the vision of some Scunthorpe fans has been so severely damaged they actually believe they could stay up.”

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South Yorkshire Football’s Changing Face John Ryan could be considered mad. When he bought Rovers in the summer of 1998, the heady heights of second tier football that he went on to predict seemed a little premature, considering the club had no goal nets or footballs and for the opening day of their first season in Conference football they sought to borrow kit from neighbours Sheffield United.

Ten years after Ryan’s declaration, made at a time when both Steel City clubs were prospering in the upper echelons of English football, Rovers completed their remarkable journey to that seemingly improbable second tier. As forecasts go, Ryan’s was impressive and he may have wanted to stash the crystal ball away there and then. He’s not that type of chairman though and shocked pundits and fans across South Yorkshire a year ago, when, after Rovers secured another season in the Championship, he boldly predicted a power shift in the region.“I genuinely believe Doncaster and Barnsley will be fore-runners from now on. There could well be a power shift and maybe the Sheffield clubs have had their time.”

Sheffield United season ticket holder David Taylor recalls:“I thought it was same old Ryan shouting his mouth off again to be honest. he’s always trying to attract a bit of

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publicity for Doncaster, but at Bramall Lane we felt confident we had a squad capable of challenging for the top six and Rovers didn’t because their squad’s not big enough“ Ryan could potentially thrive off his mysticMeg-like status. The Doncaster chairman currently sees his side scrapping for their Championship survival, behind Barnsley, but ahead of the Blades.“Ryan looks as if he could be right in the end if we go down. I think the uncertainty of relegation is what worries us. Some clubs bounce back stronger like Norwich or Leicester, others can take a lot longer to return,”said Taylor.

Indeed a third tier Steel City derby is on the cards for the first time since 1980 in an era where Alejandro Sabella and Terry Curran were representatives of the red and blue halves respectively.

“The form of both sides has been rubbish and despite changing their managers, the internal problems haven’t been rectified in order for either to have what would be considered a successful season,”said BBC Radio Sheffield’s Seth Bennett. It’s been an eventful season for Bennett. Rotherham, as well as both Sheffield clubs have changed managers at some point, but it’s the antics of the latter which attracts the headlines.

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Wednesday replaced the reserved Alan Irvine in favour of Gary Megson who made over 230 appearances as a player for the Hillsborough outfit. Meanwhile the Blades saw Gary Speed depart for the Welsh national job and, after missing out on number one target Sean O’Driscoll, Mickey Adams, who was brought up in the city, took the helm.

With Wednesday also struggling in League One this season, it has raised a few questions over why both sides are hindered so much. Megson spoke out after the recent loss at home to Brentford:“Players should be inspired by Hillsborough, not scared of it. I’m worried if our own players are intimidated. It’s easy. The opposition should be scared but we’re not intense enough.”

Not having the players to deal with the pressures of playing in a former World Cup and European Championship venue may be the Wednesday players’excuse, but could having two men in charge who care about their team so much actually have a detrimental effect? Megson for one has admitted to his position being unique in that he’s never taken work home with him until now as the threat of an Owls’relegation to the fourth tier of English for the first time in their 144-year history football looms over him.

“We haven’t seen the Gary Megson effect that was hoped for. I thought they’d be pushing for the top six at the end of the season,”admitted Bennett.“As for Micky Adams, it’s tough. His problems include trying to redress an imbalanced wage structure. Anyone who thought Sheffield United were going to be a top 6 side this season needs their head checking.

South Yorkshire Football 1999 - 2011 Club

League Position* 10/05/1999

17/4/2011

33

37

108

40

73

78

28

44

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*League Position refers to position within entire Football Pyramid from the Premier League downwards

“Overall the clubs have been at their prime when they’ve had good managers that they’ve been able to hold on to. Look at [Neil] Warnock’s seven year tenure at United. It resulted in promotion to the Premier League and but for a slight bit of arrogance where they thought they were safe, they might still be there.”

Doncaster who have one of the lowest budgets by Championship standard are looking to maintain their status for a record equalling fourth successive season and with key players such as Billy Sharp on a long term contract, the future arguably looks bright for one of the area’s lesser lights. A meeting between the Tykes and the Rovers at Oakwell on Easter Monday is a fixture that looks likely to be repeated next season affirming both sides’ascent and it could well be a meeting that would have no resonance in Sheffield.

POPULAR STAND; a football fanzine for the likes of Doncaster

TB

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Stat Attack The Science of football... made easy Cri$cisms of Mark Wilson Reasonable cri-cisms of Mark Wilson Unreasonable cri-cicsms of Mark Wilson

Season Progress vs Emergence of Soothsayers

Rovers League Posi;on

Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec Jan Feb Mar Apr

People Claiming They Never Rated Sean O'Driscoll

The Make‐Up of John Oster Skin Hair Bandage Ta.oo

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POPULAR STAND; a football fanzine for the likes of Doncaster

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What Following DRFC Players on Twi6er Teaches You The wisdom of Mustapha Dumbuya Whats on at the Cinema How bored footballers are Doncaster needs a Nandos

Days Spent Achieving Bugger All in the Box 300 250 200 150 100 50 0

David Blaine

Ferando Torres

Carl Alford

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Tweet Cred Down with the kids in 140 characters or less In the name of research (and in celebration of the relaxation of a restraining order which was never even justified in the first place; it’s not as if Susanna Reid actually noticed such a tiny little camera in her bathroom light fitting) I recently took the plunge and finally joined the ranks of the Twitterati.

Fortunately for the purposes of keeping this relevant to a Rovers fanzine and steering me away from BBC Breakfast’s number one reason to get out of bed in the morning, several of the #DRFC playing squad are also now on Twitter. And Chris Mortley. Or as he’s known in Popular Stand Towers,“The hardest working press officer in show-business”.

It’s testament to the addictive qualities of this web-stalking phenomenon that I almost involuntarily typed the hashtag before“DRFC”there. Anyway, without further ado or any more references to Ms. Reid’s figure hugging, short-hemmed attire accentuating a set of terrific pins... (that’s quite enough of that –Ed) here are the top ten things I’ve learned:

one.

Mustapha Dumbuya is living the dream making a living out of playing Championship football and is a true gentleman in a game sadly lacking in that department. But he can’t find an afro hair dresser in Doncaster.

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two.

It seems that Viva Rovers was astonishingly close to the mark with its short-lived (ok, one-off) feature, At Home With the Rovers. Gary Woods, Ryan Mason and Mustapha Dumbuya either live together in one big house or simply can’t get enough of each other’s company, with constant mickey-taking about their culinary skills, Playstation prowess, TV watching habits and time spent on the throne. I might have made the last one up.

three.

James Chambers is currently undergoing some kind of osmosis into a Robocopesque cyborg with the help of a machine that is stretching his knees.

four.

Simon Gillett won’t be signing for Scunthorpe at any point in the immediate future because he can’t pick up a signal for BBC Radio 1Xtra there.

f ive.

If Nandos ever open a branch in Doncaster they will turn a profit from Rovers players alone.

six.

Gary Woods has got an iPad 2. Mustapha Dumbuya has only got an iPad 1

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seven.

@jimmyoc2

Rovers players have dubious taste in TV, actually choosing to watch The Only Way is Essex. But they are better with films, recently cuddling up on the sofa to watch A Bronx Tale.

“Just on the way to the ground to watch the lads...

Beautiful day for it... Come on DRFC (James O’Connor)

@woodsy333

“Its all going off in Eastenders!”

eight.

Simon Gillett thinks he’s unbeatable at FIFA.

nine.

(Gary Woods)

@monaviedrinkswt

Jimmy O’Connor is rubbish at Mario Kart.

ten.

And finally – Chris Mortley really IS the hardest working press officer in showbusiness.

How I managed to live a normal and fulfilled life without knowing all that I have no idea!

Follow your favourite Rovers stars (and Wayne Thomas) via the following twitter addresses. Sample tweets included at no extra charge.

MF

“Secretly quite enjoying Mamma mia tho. Think I’m gonna take the little man to a musical in london!”

(Wayne Thomas)

@jasoneuell

“Well done today CAFC and SFC how did the AFC Wombles get on?”

(Jason Euell)

@jay6chambers

“Focus focus and a little more focus, if i want it that bad then thats what i got to do” (James Chambers)

@pasima1

@ryan_mason13

(Mustapha Dumbuya)

(Ryan Mason)

@s_gilly18

@chrismortley

“Sometimes i find it hard to look at my own feet”

“Usher time on the way to training. His Here I Stand album is seriously under rated” (Simon Gillett) POPULAR STAND; a football fanzine for the likes of Doncaster

“Ferne cotton gaggling milk... Kinda sexy hahaaa”

“So, what are fans up to this weekend? And which player do you think Rovers miss most through injury?”

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Keith West’s Championship Diary Thoughts of a Fanatical Rover

I’ve been reading the fanzine for as long as I’ve been going to the Rovers and thought it was about time I started offering my thoughts on things. I got in touch with Viva via the VSC Forum and he agreed to print my diary of recent games. Hopefully I’ll do it again in the new season. Hope you enjoy it. RTID. Tuesday 8th March Doncaster Rovers 1 Coventry City 1 Feared the worst when we went behind here, but eventually we fought back for a well deserved point. James Hayter’s just got that knack of getting a goal at the right time hasn’t he, can’t believe people have ever doubted him. That said we really should be beating teams like Coventry at home. It was also disappointing to see such a poor attendance, when I saw the goals back on Sky tonight after I’d finished watching the Barcelona v Arsenal game at home I was really disappointed to see so many empty seats. Its about time the town’s people got behind this club and started actually going to the games.

Saturday 12th March Nottingham Forest 0 Doncaster Rovers 0 Another hard fought point. I’ve said for a long time we’ll be OK, and on today’s defensive performance its not in any doubt.

Solid as a rock. George Friend and Shelton

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Martis are proving to be a quality centreback partnership, really excellent game from the both of them. Shame we couldn’t find the net, but we’re certainly turning the corner. Rovers‘til I Die. Saturday 19th March Doncaster Rovers 0 Queens Park Rangers 1 I thought we were unlucky in this one. Up against the league leaders we gave a good account of ourselves here just a shame we fell apart for their goal. What was Sam Hird doing, trying to play right back when he’s not a right back. That’s not good enough for this level. Still, as I say we were a bit unlucky not to get something from the game. It was a delight to see Warnock at work on the touchline. Now I like SO’D, but you have to be impressed by the passion Warnock shows on the touchline, whinging at the referee all the time and having a go at the 4th official constantly. It’s a great example he sets and I’d love to see him at the Rovers.

Saturday 2nd April Bristol City 1 Doncaster Rovers 0 Another defeat. Its just not good enough.

We’re being out battled and out muscled by teams because of the way we play and its got to stop. We need people to be laying bodies on the line for the club. SO’D need to be chucking tea cups round the dressing

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room not talking up the little things like performance, tactics and the technical side of the game. Oster was rubbish, you know I’ve never really rated him, even when he was playing really well last season.

Stock was useless, he’s never really done anything for us has he? We should have offloaded him the other year when we had the chance. I see Hayter has reverted to type, he’s never been a goalscorer. I knew all those goals earlier in the season were just a blip. I didn’t go today mind, but its clear that we’re being out-played by teams.

Saturday 9th April Doncaster Rovers 1 Cardiff City 3 Typical Donny! Throw it away. Just what we deserved today. I mean yes we had more possession and more chances but what else did we do? We get back level and then get greedy pushing for a win; we over commit men forward and leave ourselves short at the back. I’ve said Friend and Martis aren’t up to task for ages and today just proves that. Where were they on the second goal? Cardiff brought on Jason Koumas, an international midfielder, why isn’t O’Driscoll taking a leaf out of Dave Jones’book and doing the same? We are deep in the mire now, we need to show more passion and knock this tippity tappety football on the head. Why do we persist with this 4-3-2-1 formation or whatever it is?

If I don’t recognise the formation from the stand what hope have the players got, and besides what have we ever achieved with it anyway? We’re in freefall and I can’t see where our next point is coming from.

Tuesday 12th April Doncaster Rovers 1 Preston North End 1 A hard fought point this, and one that had to come sooner or later the way we were playing. The lads really dug in to get this, but it was a scrappy game. If only we’d got it down and played more, moved the ball about we’d have had too much for the man with the tan and his Preston team. That said why O’Driscoll settled for the draw taking Oster off and putting Thomas on I don’t know, he should be committing us for a win, not playing safe.

An Appeal; Witnesses Wanted Popular Stand is appealing for witnesses to a unique event which is believed to have occured on Tuesday 1st March, 2011 at Pride Park, Derby. According to reports, at around 9:00pm when called upon to“give us a wave” by the Rovers crowd, manager Sean O’Driscoll actually did move his arm in a manner so as to suggest a wave. Were you there? Can you verify this? Had you been drinking? Had he?

(almost a wave, but not quite) POPULAR STAND; a football fanzine for the likes of Doncaster

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Blowing my own Trumpet Managerial Terms...

The rise of football messageboards and phone-ins, means that everyone has an opinion. Got a banal question? Well why keep it locked safely in your own mind when you can even interrupt the Football League highlights programme to ask it to the even more banal Leroy Rosenior? The thing is though, the more fans type their frustrations on a keyboard or text them to Alan Green the more they become framed by a distinct lexicon. The same soundbytes become used so often they are taken as facts and as actual terms of language, when more often than not they are just empty sentences. As an English Literature graduate (no really!) this interests me as much as it angers me, and so I felt it worth examining some of these terms and phrases a little more closely.

Lost the Dressing Room

This turn of phrase is normally trotted out when a previously strong team has started performing badly, with its star players noticeable primarily by the absence of their effectiveness. The manager is deemed to have lost the respect of his players, they no longer wish to perform for him. What is odd about this in my mind is that it is always labelled as the manager losing the dressing room, despite the signs more often than not showing something of a reverse. The manager hasn’t lost the dressing room, the overpaid self

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aggrandising young men around him have become bored and disinterested and decided to let the manager take the flack.

He only drives a Rover after all. What does he know about modern football? He’s never even been to The Ivy or hung out with desperate blonds in the little roped off bit of a gaudy Essex nightclub.

The fact of the matter is this, despite how often you hear the phrase, only one manager in history has ever lost the dressing room. That man was Michael Caine, in Escape to Victory, when at halftime against the Germans he did lose the Allies’dressing room... it fell through a hole in the bath into an underground escape tunnel.

Passion

Passion is the token thing that fans want to see from a manager. Particularly from fans of a team which is not doing too well. Passion in football manager terms however should not be confused with passion on the silver screen for example.

Supporters do not wish to see their team’s gaffer running in slow motion across a rain drenched technical area toward a piano backed embrace with the fourth official.

No, what the mean by passion is that in essence they want their manager to act like a bit of a cock.

You can be as technically proficient and as tactically astute as you like, but at the end of the day (another phrase used by the

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passion-seakers a lot) if you’re not displaying the signs of oncoming mental illness in front of your dugout then you’re not what folk are after. Remember the last time you crossed the street, or got off the bus four stops early to avoid a person you determined to be not of sound mind? Well all the traits that borderline psychopath displayed, are what constitutes ‘passion’in a football manager. Shouting and swearing. Pointing at nothing in particular with fierce insistence. A belief in an underhand conspiracy against them.

Hurling inanimate objects about. Berating any type of official present. And then duly pleading ignorance and disbelief that they have actually done anything untoward.

It’ll get you kicked out the first bar you set foot in on a Saturday night, but it’ll win you much moronic support as a football manager.

He’s a Character

Similar to the above in many ways... if a manager is labelled as a character then he’s actually an absolute wanker. See Neil Warnock, Billy Davies, Steve Evans, Phil Brown for further details.

Taken the Team as Far as He Can

This one is the term which bugs me most, because it’s a statement that can only truly be determined in retrospect. And on what criteria is this judged? On the messageboards after defeat to Hull City there were folk starting to suggest that Sean O’Driscoll had taken Rovers as far as he can. That is a suggestion determined only by your own criteria, as if you demand constant upward progression then perhaps you have a point. However, historically,

staying at this level as long as we currently have has only been achieved once before.

Finishing 20th or 21st for another five seasons would mean the club had enjoyed its longest unbroken spell at this level of the game. Rovers may not be‘doing a Blackpool’, but in their own terms it would be the best its ever been.

When John Toshack was sacked by Wales recently the term“taken the side as far as he can”was used. Under Toshack the side had dropped to 115th in the World rankings, but trust me he could have taken that side a lot lower. The term is used as a handy excuse to dispose of a manager when teams stand still. Football fans are no longer patient, they want progression and they want it now. Consolidation is not good enough. I can empathise, the follower count for the Viva Rovers Twitter feed has been hovering around the 450 mark for the best part of a fortnight. The pressure is on, I’ve tried to entice new followers with witty asides about Alan Knill looking like the person they’d get to play Sean O’Driscoll in a Crimewatch reconstruction, but sadly its proved to no avail... I’m stuck at 450. I’ve clearly taken the twitter account as far as I can go and should step down immediately, or... start showing some passion, by swearing and arguing with anyone who replies. True my tweets may not then be coherent or delivered with any kind of thought, but at least it’ll look like I care about them a bit more unstably. Maybe I’ll throw a tea-cup at the screen. Perhaps then I can turn it round and stop maintaining these respectable numbers.

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The View from the Clift Is there anything more desperate than writing about how you don’t really have anything to write about? Let me explain; I last wrote for Popular Stand nine years ago. At the time I was an obsessive Rovers fan and rarely missed more than a handful of games per season. All that trekking up and down the country to the likes of Nuneaton, Southport and Woking gave me plenty of Roversrelated material which I was able to skilfully interweave with silken threads of egotistical musings, poor puns and laboured metaphors to create a multi-layered lexical tapestry of… shit, I’m still doing the laboured metaphor thing aren’t I.

so angry at that poor man anyway. At the moment I consider them too young to attend home or away, even though other fans may not agree - particularly the father of the baby I witnessed being waved in the air at West Brom last season. My son is nearly four, his favourite teddy is called Sir Francis Tierney (I may have suggested that name) and I have high hopes that he’ll attend his first home game next season - provided he’s mastered standing up to have a piss by then; well it’ll save him having to join the half-time queue of desperate smokers waiting for a cubicle in the West Stand bogs.

So what’s changed in the last nine years?

What’s put me in a situation where I’m desperately scrabbling about for Roversrelated inspiration to enable me to write this article just because I promised Glen that I would? Well part of the reason is probably that I don’t go to away games any more; maybe one or two a season in the recent past, but none at all this season. Not one.

Why not? Well, funny you should ask, as I’ve decided that compiling a list of reasons for my lack of away game attendance might just go some way towards keeping Glen off my back until… well, until the next fanzine deadline I suppose:

Home of the world’s first official football club and a city of proud footballing heritage; a legacy spat upon, ground into the dirt, set on fire and the resulting ashes shat on by its two current professional sides, who see a football as little more than an object to be launched as far as possible into the air in the hope it might land on the head of a giant lumbering striker every so often. OK, so I didn’t move

Moving to Sheffield

Kids I now have two kids. When they’re older I hope they’ll both be coming to home games with me, if only so I can see my wife’s reaction when they come home after a match and ask her yet again why the referee was a fucking joke, and why does Daddy get

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to Sheffield for the Blades or the Owls.

However, it’s also Europe’s greenest city with 2 million trees, 83 parks and the Peak District on the doorstep. An excellent alternative to spending my Saturdays in Scunthorpe, Middlesbrough or Swansea. Of course, I still get out of Sheffield for Rovers’home games – there’s only so much of that ridiculous accent a man can take.

Travelling by Road

Driving on the UK’s motorways requires you to have lightning-quick reactions and nerves of steel, or extreme patience. Either you’ll be stuck in an endless traffic jam desperately trying to ignore the growing need for a piss and pretending not to notice the coach load of school kids just in front of you trying to catch your attention with their charming raised middle fingers. Or you’ll be speeding along marvelling at the fact that every single one of those expensive BMWs passing you in the outside lane seems to have a faulty set of indicators and you need to establish some sort of telepathic link with the sales rep driving it if you want to have the slightest clue of exactly when the pinstriped fucker is going to make his inevitable decision to cut in front of you and force you to violently slam on the brakes.

Halfwits in the Away End

I tend to avoid voluntarily putting myself into situations where I’m likely to experience close proximity to gibbering idiots; the sort of people

too stupid to even realise that they’re stupid.

There’s a certain section of the footballattending demographic that seem to exist on such a hair-trigger temper that they spend their lives looking for a reason to take offence at anything or anyone, because the only relief they get from the simmering frustration of their wasted lives is when they can externalise their internal rage, using whatever reason they can find to project their burning hatred and resentment elsewhere.

Anyway, live and let live and all that shit, but I’m not prepared to spend thirty quid for the privilege of being cooped up next to one of these Neanderthals in a cramped away end, fearful that if I look at them in the wrong way I’ll be hurled across several rows of seats.

Stewards I think they’re called.

So do my circumstances and lack of away game attendance mean that I’m no longer a‘true’Rovers fan? I decided to put this to the test by visiting one or two of the footballrelated web forums out there to see if I could gain an understanding of what the consensus of feeling is amongst my fellow supporters. I discovered that there appears to be a perpetual online debate on this subject between people with too much time on their hands. My investigations led me to discover a whole spectrum of opinions from foolish people who I assume must need some sort of drool catcher permanently installed over their computer keyboards, and ultimately led me to the considered conclusion that I really didn’t give a toss what any of them thought anyway. If you have an opinion on this subject and are labouring under the mistaken belief that other people wish to know about it, you can probably contact Popular Stand or something.

MC

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Windmills of Your Mind

A Statistical Look at the Rovers from Dutch Uncle Though perhaps not the obvious choice given Rovers’current league position this edition of Windmills of Your Mind is focused on goalscoring.

Billy Sharp’s fifteen League goals at tier two this season has only ever been bettered on three occasions in Rovers’history. Reg Baines struck 19 times in 1935-36, Bert Tindill’s 17 goals in 1955-56 and Kit Lawlor also with 17 in 1953-54. However the 15 goal tally has been equaled on another six occasions, including by Billy himself last season.

Sharp’s goal against Leeds ensured he became only the 6th player to hit double figures for the club at tier two in two separate seasons. Perhaps unsurprisingly the other five all achieved the feat in the 1950s – Alick Jeffrey, Johnny Mooney, and Ray Harrison, plus Kit Lawlor who managed it three times and Bert Tindill who did so no fewer than seven times.

Billy also became just the tenth player in club history to score 15 goals for two seasons in succession, and the first since Peter Kitchen and Brendan O’Callaghan both managed it in 1975-76 and 1976-77.

The other seven players to do so were Alick Jeffrey (1964-65 and 1965-66), Colin Booth (1962-63 and 1963-64), Tony Leighton (three seasons from 1959-60 to 1961-62), Bert Tindill (three seasons from 1954-55 to 1956-57) Peter Doherty (1949-

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50 and 1950-51), Reg Baines (1934-35 and 1935-36), and finally, or perhaps most impressively Tom Keetley (an amazing six seasons from 1923-24 to 1928-29, in all of which he scored more than 20 goals).

In November James Hayter scored in five consecutive League matches - a feat achieved only 25 times in Rovers’entire history. The last occasion was of course Billy Sharp last year who went on to score in six consecutive League matches (only the 12th time that has happened in Rovers’ history), but prior to that such a goalscoring run had not been achieved since Ian Nimmo in 1980-81.

James Coppinger has scored five goals or more for the 6th successive season.

Strangely this has only happened on two occasions before, namely Bert Tindill, for 10 seasons from 1948-9 to 1957-8, and Tom Keetley, as mentioned above, for the six seasons from 1923 to 1929.

We currently (at the time of writing) have three players on the books with 30 or more first team goals to their credit; James Hayter (34), James Coppinger (33) and Billy Sharp (31). This is the first time this has occurred since 1984-5 when Glynn Snodin, Colin Douglas and Steve Lister were all at the club. In fact this has only happened eight times in our entire League history owing to the tendency for goalscorers to move on or be sold.

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It is interesting to look at strike rates for these three current players. Billy has 31 league and cup goals in a total of 65 appearances (61 league plus 4 cup; of which two were as substitute) for a strike rate of 0.477 goals a game. Up until the home game with Preston this season, James Hayter had 34 League, Cup and Play-Off goals in a total of 142 appearances (of which 44 were as sub) for a strike rate of 0.239, and James Coppinger a total of 33 goals in 292 appearances (of which 37 were as sub) for a strike rate of 0.113. This would put Billy in a very creditable 9th place in the list of all time strike rates for players with 30 goals or more. A table detailing Rovers players’ all-time strike-rates (compiled at the end of the 2009-10 season) can be found overleaf on page 26.

Finally, Billy Sharp now has 30 league goals at tier two, which puts him in equal 6th place with Peter Doherty for goals at this level. However, he remains well behind the Rovers all time leading second tier scorer, namely Bert Tindill who has 101 goals, with Kit Lawlor a distant second having scored 46.

Caveat - no figures quoted in this article are official. Dutch Uncle uses man,y often conflicting sources including club handbooks, Rothmans/Sky annuals, and best of all the official Rovers history by Bluff & Watson. For definitive data the reader is referred to Tony Bluff and/or Barry Watson.

BW

Of course not all of those in the table are strikers, for example Fred Emery, Steve Lister, Paul Green and Glyn Snodin.

Others such as Colin Douglas and Alan Warboys started as strikers and later reverted to defenders. Others like Michael McIndoe and Jamie Paterson were more attack minded midfielders. Also, since the introduction of substitutes in 1965, a significant number of the appearances of latter day players may well have been less than 90 minutes, either coming on as a substitute or being substituted. Full details (e.g. the time of substitutions) are not available, but players with more than 10% substitute appearances, and as such are likely to have a strike rate noticeably better than those shown are Heffernan, Hayter, Green, Barnes, Blundell, Jones, Coppinger, Paterson and Nimmo POPULAR STAND; a football fanzine for the likes of Doncaster

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Doncaster Rovers Player Strike Rates DONCASTER ROVERS PLAYERS' STRIKE RATES (Qualification 30 Goals) Name Seasons T.Keetley 1923-28 C.Jordan 1946-47 C.Booth 1962-63 L.Sheffield 1965-66 & 69 R.Dodd 1933-36 P.Doherty 1949-52 R.Baines 1934-36 T.Leighton 1959-61 A.Jeffrey 1954-56 & 63-68 M.Kilhoury 1936-38 E.Perry 1936-38 A.Turner 1933-36 P.Kitchen 1970-76 P.Barnes 2001-03 R.Harrison 1949-53 B.O'Callaghan 1973-77 K.Lawlor 1950-54 I.Nimmo 1979-81 P.Heffernan 2005-10 P.Todd 1946-49 J.Fernie 1958-60 G.Blundell 2002-04 A.Hale 1962-64 M.Elwiss 1971-73 J.Paterson 2000-03 B.Tindill 1946-57 Gr. Jones 1993-95 S.Briggs 1968-72 W.Bott 1926-30 F.Keetley 1926-29 S.Burton 1932-38 E.McMorran 1952-57 M.McIndoe 2003-06 A.Warboys 1966-67 & 79-81 G.Watson 1966-72 J.Mooney 1953-58 R.Walker 1952-60 R.Gilfillan 1965-70 A.Broadbent 1959-65 G.Snodin 1977-84 & 98 R.Smith 1929-36 C.Douglas 1981-85 & 88-92 P.Green 2001-08 S.Lister 1978-84 F.Emery 1924-35

Appearances Lge Other As Sub 231 10 0 60 7 0 88 13 0 73 12 2 68 2 0 103 7 0 80 1 0 84 4 0 262 33 2 63 7 0 98 4 0 119 3 0 228 28 7 71 17 14 126 9 0 187 25 3 127 8 0 86 14 10 127 33 51 160 12 0 89 9 0 86 12 15 119 17 0 97 11 1 100 18 14 401 28 0 92 13 14 120 7 9 111 9 0 110 3 0 196 8 0 128 13 0 122 20 5 129 22 2 157 17 5 168 14 0 240 17 0 188 20 10 206 25 0 310 35 25 264 13 0 404 64 24 236 47 70 237 35 9 417 21 0

Lge 180 48 57 41 38 57 43 45 127 28 45 51 89 31 48 65 46 29 36 50 31 28 42 31 34 124 26 34 32 28 50 31 28 32 33 32 47 35 39 59 36 53 31 30 30

Goals FAC FLC Other 6 0 0 2 0 0 3 2 0 1 6 0 0 0 1 3 0 0 0 0 0 0 1 0 8 4 0 5 0 0 0 0 0 1 0 1 9 7 0 2 1 2 3 0 0 2 10 0 2 0 0 2 3 0 4 4 10 8 0 0 2 0 0 2 2 0 2 0 0 3 1 0 2 0 1 9 0 0 2 1 1 0 2 0 1 0 0 2 0 0 2 0 2 6 0 0 3 4 0 3 1 0 2 3 0 4 0 0 1 2 0 2 1 0 1 2 0 1 1 1 4 0 0 4 5 0 0 1 3 0 1 0 1 0 0

Total 186 50 62 48 39 60 43 46 139 33 45 53 105 36 51 77 48 34 54 58 33 32 44 35 37 133 30 36 33 30 54 37 35 36 38 36 50 38 42 62 40 62 35 31 31

Str Rate 0.772 0.746 0.614 0.565 0.557 0.545 0.531 0.523 0.471 0.471 0.441 0.434 0.410 0.409 0.378 0.363 0.356 0.340 0.338 0.337 0.337 0.327 0.324 0.324 0.314 0.310 0.286 0.283 0.275 0.265 0.265 0.262 0.246 0.238 0.218 0.198 0.195 0.183 0.182 0.180 0.144 0.132 0.124 0.114 0.071

‘Other’includes goals scored in play-offs, division 3 north Challenge Cup, and group cup, but does not include goals scored in the Sheffield County Cup, abandoned matches or anulled matches.

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The Belles, The Belles Rovers’season may be coming to a close, but your chance to watch a team in red and white hoops in action on the football field is not set to end any time soon. The FA Women’s Super League, the country’s first ever semi-professional female football league, kicked off it’s inaugural season on Wednesday 13th April with the Doncaster Rovers Belles rightly one of the founding members.

campaign on Easter Sunday as they take on Chelsea at the Keepmoat. Belles manager John Buckley has assembled an impressive squad with an international flavour including Candian Kylla Sjoman, Irish forward Aine O’Gorman and the League’s first ever Swedish player Maria Karlsson. All that remains to recruit is the fans. So please, get yourself down to the Keepmoat and get behind the Belles

One of the longest established women’s football teams the Belles were formed in 1969 by the draw ticket sellers at Rovers’ Belle Vue ground, hence the club name.

Initially just a small-sided football team they grew over the years lifting the Women’s FA Cup three times in the 1980s to become founder members of the National League.

The Belles did the League and Cup double twice in the 90s and have remained at the forefront of the female game ever since.

Now known as the Doncaster Rovers Belles, having joined forces with the Rovers six years ago they are one of eight sides competing in the new Super League; Chelsea, Arsenal, Liverpool, Everton, Birmingham, Bristol Academy and Lincoln being the others. And it was Lincoln who provided the opposition for the Belles season opener on 13th April. In front of a decent crowd at Sincil Bank it was the Doncaster side who triumphed too, winning 1-0 through a goal from captain Vicky Exley.

Upcoming Fixtures Sun 24 April; home vs Chelsea 2:00pm Sun 1 May; away to Bristol Ac. 2:00pm Wed 4 May; home to Liverpool 7:45pm Sat 7 May; home to Arsenal 2:00pm Thu 12 May; home to Everton 7:45pm All home games played at the Keepmoat Stadium. Match tickets for Belles home games are priced £6 adults and £3 concessions. Season tickets are priced at £30 adults and £15 concessions For full details on the Belles and to keep up with their fortunes in the first Women’s Super League season go to their website; www.doncasterroversbelles.co.uk

GW

Whilst Popular Stand was away at the printers the Belles played their second league game at Everton, and now they get set to play their first home game of the POPULAR STAND; a football fanzine for the likes of Doncaster

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What if...?

The Situation

A cold December night at Belle Vue. A League Cup Quarter Final between Doncaster Rovers and Arsenal. Arsene Wenger’s cosmopolitan collective are up against it, a world away from the marble halls of Highbury they’re having a horrible night and haven’t fancied it much since Robin Van Persie tried to control a ball on the edge of the box and was hit with all the force of a Welsh mountain, or as we know him Stephen Roberts. Now, as the match enters injury-time at the end of extra-time they find themselves 2-1 down to these League One Northern upstarts thanks to a disastrous (yet hilarious) deliberation on the goal-line by Philippe Senderos. They need a goal, and yet the ball is all the way in the far corner of the field at Paul Heffernan’s feet. What hope have they got?

What Happened Next

Heffernan elects not to wind down the clock, but instead puts in a tame cross which Arsenal are able to hack clear and away over to the right flank where Emmanuel Eboué exchanges passes before escaping down the right wing. As he approaches the area Eboué puts in a low cross which is agonisingly beyond the reach of Roberts and Gilberto manages to hook it past Jan Budtz and into the bottom corner to level the scores. With Rovers deflated, the final whistle goes shortly afterwards and the Gunners win the resulting penalty shoot-out 3-1.

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Arsenal go on to lose in the League Cup semi-finals to Wigan, but end their season on something of a high as they reach the Champions League final. However, despite taking the lead they lose 2-1 to Barcelona. They secure fourth place on the final game of the season, to secure the final Champions League qualifying spot from rivals Tottenham. For Rovers it’s back to League One action with a bump by way of a 4-0 loss at Nottingham Forest, but the team eventually regain form to finish in eighth place.

But it might not have been that way...

What if Heffs had just booted the ball in Asda Car Park?

With Rovers leading 2-1 and the Carling Cup Quarter Final approaching injury time Nick Fenton intercepts a throw-in and pokes the bal towards Paul Heffernan who duly dribbles the ball toward the corner flag.

With the Pop Stand urging him to hoof the ball into Asda car-park he does just that, flicking it up neatly before volleying it high over the Rossington End fence. Eventually a replacement ball reaches Manuel Almunia, but his goal-kick is nodded back upfield by a towering Stephen Roberts header and with the ball back in Almunia’s area Phil Dowd blows for full-time.

Belle Vue erupts, for the first time in their history Rovers have reached a Cup semi-

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final, and a joyous pitch invasion ensues with winning goalscorer Paul Green carried shoulder high from the field. In a bizarre post-match interview Arsene Wenger claims not to have seen any of the match at all, insisting he’ll not accept the result until he has watched the whole game back later. Dave Penney meanwhile is too busy still jumping up and down in the technical area with a look of disbelief permanently etched across his face. In his absence John Ryan handles the press, and media, and goes on to do so right through Christmas... and January... and the Spring.

And so to the semi-final and a two legged tie with Premier League newcomers Wigan Athletic. Over 6,000 Rovers fans make the trip to the JJB Stadium, and the club’s support is swelled even further by glory-hunting Wigan supporters who on their first trip to the stadium for a match that isn’t Rugby League presume the red and white hooped side to be that of their town.

The unrest in amongst the home support extends onto the team and incredibly Rovers take the lead through former Latic Neil Roberts. Wigan equalise through Paul Scharner, but Rovers, thanks to some heroics from Jan Budtz who saves one point blank effort from Jason Roberts with his oversized quiff, hold on for a 1-1 draw in the 1st leg.

For the return match Belle Vue is sold out and despite the presence of television cameras Rovers fans can be spotted, as they were for the Division 3 promotion game in the nearby trees, on the roof of Asda , and on ladders against the fence behind the Pop Side. The full-house

roars on the Rovers, the match is tense and fraught and ultimately settled by one goal scored in the final minute. Michael McIndoe getting to the left byline, whips in a cross which flashes across the six-yard box and cannons into the roof of the net off the arse of Leo Fortune-West, the forward having bent down to tie his shoelace. Belle Vue erupts, another pitch invasion and another victory, Rovers are in the Carling Cup Final.

For a month Cup Final fever grips the town. The Asda adjacent to Belle Vue unveils a bronze football statue, cited in the exact place Heffernan’s hoofed clearance against Arsenal landed in their car-park.

However the supermarket is forced to remove the monument within a week after it trips half a dozen unaware Doncaster pensioners, and a further twenty-five adult males suffer broken toes having been unable to resist attempting to boot the ball across the tarmac.

(Leo; inadvertant semi-final hero)

POPULAR STAND; a football fanzine for the likes of Doncaster

issue 52

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Sean Thornton takes the opportunity to resurrect his rapping career by launching the Rovers’Cup Final single, a retake on a Sir Mixalot classic title“I Like Jan Budtz and I Cannot Lie”in honour of the keeper’s heroics at the JJB Stadium. The record goes platinum... sorry, not platinum. It goes flat and then some. Rovers’progress to the final is not completely without disappointment though as the January transfer window sees McIndoe leave the club for Premier League Portsmouth.

Over 30,000 Rovers fans (well at least for the day) travel to Cardiff for the final, but it is a disastrous day for the team as Manchester United cruise to a 7-0 victory with Ruud Van Nistelrooy and Wayne Rooney each grabbing a hat-trick; Cristiano Ronaldo scores the other. The only bright point for Rovers fans comes late in the game when Fortune-West, on as a substitute inadvertently wipes out Gary Neville whilst appealing for a throw-in.

Rovers now return to the league where, with minds distracted by the Cup dates, their form has slipped to leave them looking nervously over their shoulders at relegation. However, the team rallies in the coming months to finish 15th. In the summer Dave Penney moves north to replace new England manager Steve McLaren at Middlesbrough and takes Paul Green with him to the Riverside. Keen to capitalise on the extra fans which followed the club’s Carling Cup progress John Ryan goes after a big name manager to succeed Penney and brings Kevin Keegan to the club.

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Keegan makes a couple of big name signings, bringing in both Billy Sharp and Andy Keogh from neighbours Scunthorpe and Rovers look to be on course for promotion. However, the club loses its grip on second place in the closing weeks of the season and after a defeat at Yeovil in the penultimate match Keegan goes into a bizarre rant about Bristol City manager Gary Johnson on Radio Sheffield claiming that“they’ve still got to go to play Rotherham and get something, and I tell you what I would love it, love it if we beat them.”City do get something against Rotherham... promotion and Rovers crash out in the play-off semi-finals to Blackpool.

As for Arsenal, the humiliating repots of their Cup exit to Doncaster spread and they subsequently fail to capture the signing of Emanuel Adebayor. Without the presence of the Togolese forward Arsenal can only finish the season in fifth place and to add insult to injury Tottenham claim the fourth Champions League spot. This disappointing end to their final season at Highbury means the pressure is on Arsene Wenger going into the following season.

The failure of the Gunners to reach the UEFA Cup knock-out stages after defeats away to Besiktas and Bayer Leverkusen is seen by many as the final straw and Wenger is sacked in December... a year to the day after that defeat at Belle Vue.

POPULAR STAND; a football fanzine for the likes of Doncaster

GW

issue 52

Its the return of...

Trumpet Man’s Song Book Now in its 8th or 9th or possibly even 10th year

S.O.D.

to the tune of The Beatles; Let it Be When I found myself in League One mid-table, Sean O’Driscoll came to me, Speaking words of wisdom, S.O.D. And in our hour of darkness as we dealt with losing Dave Penney, Speaking words of wisdom, S.O.D. S.O.D, S.O.D, enjoys a decent, cup of tea, Whispers words of wisdom, S.O.D. As shown to broken hearted Leeds fans crying when at Wembley, There will be an answer, S.O.D. Though often disregarded we are still here in the second tier, He has been the answer, S.O.D. S.O.D, S.O.D, enjoys a decent, cup of tea, Doesn’t care for press rooms, S.O.D. And when our form is patchy, there is still a light, that shines on me, We’re his Barmy Army; S.O.D. He’s not been tempted by offers from, Sheff United or Burnley, You cannot fault his wisdom, S.O.D. S.O.D, S.O.D, enjoys a decent, cup of tea, Delivers words of wisdom, quietly.

POPULAR STAND; a football fanzine for the likes of Doncaster

issue 52

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