Sickness and in Health
Chuck and Bunny Armstrong
Loved in Sickness and in Health
When Chuck Armstrong vowed to love his wife, Bernadine (or “Bunny” as he affectionately called her), through sickness and in health more than 60 years ago, he meant it. Prior to her passing on Oct. 22, 2023, Chuck visited her daily in the Masonic Health Care Center for more than eight hours, and through it all, counted his blessings to be by her side in a beautiful home.
“It was important to both of us,” he said. “It was just this concept of ‘presence.’ As her Alzheimer’s disease took its toll, she lost her ability to speak. So, we lived our lives through presence. We just knew that we were there with each other. It was pretty powerful.”
Chuck and Bunny, from Mechanicsburg, spent five years searching from Colorado to Florida and up the east coast for a senior living community that met their needs. Their pastor recommended Masonic Village at Elizabethtown, and after one visit, they knew, “This is it.”
“I was lucky to walk in and see her smile. I was fortunate. She didn’t recognize anyone else, but she knew me.”
Bunny had been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease in 2015, and Chuck learned the campus had an excellent memory care neighborhood.
They initially moved into the Brown Apartments in 2019, and once the construction of the Sycamore Townhomes was completed, they moved into one of the buildings.
Bunny played piano, sang in two Sell Chapel choirs, and the couple enjoyed walking on campus as long as they were able.
In fall 2021, Chuck knew he could no longer care for her safely by himself, and Bunny moved to the memory care neighborhood in the Masonic Health Care Center.
The following fall, she was placed on hospice and moved into the new Evergreen neighborhood to receive end-of-life care. She was one of the first residents in this dedicated care area. Chuck walked, drove or took the campus shuttle from his townhome each day to be with her.
“Sometimes, you just do things because you know it’s the right thing to do, and that’s how it seemed to me,” he said. “I was lucky to walk in and see her smile. I was fortunate. She didn’t recognize anyone else, but she knew me.”
“This was home for both of us,” Chuck added of Evergreen. “It’s all-encompassing and provides life transition care. It’s also family oriented.
One of the greatest joys was seeing little children who came to visit their loved ones. That was a joy for all of us.”
As a daily visitor, Chuck appreciated what Evergreen had to offer, including a small chapel, library and patio where they could watch the cattle grazing across the valley to the South.
“I don’t know how you could do any better,” Chuck said of residing at Masonic Village. “They go above and beyond to take care of the residents. It gave me comfort.”
While staff were willing to help with all aspects of Bunny’s care, Chuck felt a sense of responsibility and fed her lunch and dinner each day.
“I brought her calmness,” he said. “She was comfortable, and it was two-sided. After 62+ years together, to hold my wife’s hand each day was a blessing.”
Family was everything to Chuck and Bunny. The two met in their home state of Montana at a restaurant. It was love at first sight for Chuck, and he was pleasantly surprised when one day this past September, she confessed it was for her, too. They have four sons.
“The last thing she said to me [before she passed], was she looked at me in the eye and said, ‘Thank you for being here with me.’ She knew I needed that. She was more concerned about me than herself,” Chuck said.
Chuck was a career U.S. Army officer, and his assignments took them to various states. His oldest son was born when he was stationed in Cambodia. Bunny traveled from Montana to Saigon by herself with their son so Chuck could meet and hold him for the first time. “It was an incredible moment,” he said.
Bunny had played the piano since she was 5 years old and majored in music in college. She taught music and piano lessons to children on the different Army bases, as well as led church choirs.
“She was always active with choirs,” Chuck said. “At one church, she orchestrated a play for more than 100 children. She was a great organizer.”
The couple eventually settled in Pennsylvania. With Bunny’s musical background, Chuck found one of the best offerings at Masonic Village is the music therapy program. They never missed the bi-weekly sessions offered on Evergreen. They were also blessed by volunteer Andy Anderson, who dropped by weekly to play spirituals on his harmonica.
“It was very enjoyable for her [Bunny],” Chuck said. “She listened intently and tapped her feet. She even sang me ‘Happy Birthday,’ and I was flabbergasted.”
Chuck also appreciated the spiritual care services, especially Pastor Erin’s Wednesday morning service.
“We never missed a service. It was a largely musical acknowledgment of God’s presence in our lives,” he said. “All the services provided peace and comfort and reinforced our beliefs. The sermons were marvelous.”
Chuck has taken advantage of the monthly caregiver support group hosted on campus, which allows him to connect with others going through a similar situation. He appreciated the knowledge shared by staff, including Rick Schies, assistant director of nursing, who has extensive experience with dementia and Alzheimer’s disease, and Desiree Ecker, a social worker.
“I think it’s really helpful,” Chuck said. “It gave us a place to vent and discuss and share our thoughts. It’s a great program.”
Wherever Chuck and Bunny found themselves on life’s journey, nothing else mattered as long as they were together.
“Every day, I count our blessings,” Chuck said, “one of which is Masonic Village.”
His appreciation led Chuck to recently become a hospice volunteer, as well as a Mason.
“I feel a deep obligation to help people because of the care that she [Bunny] received. If I can reach out and help others, I’ll give it a try,” he said.
Chuck has established a support fund in honor of Bunny, which provides money directly under the control of the Director of Spiritual Care for support of Sell Chapel needs and ministries.
Granting Wishes to Make SPECIAL MOMENTS
The Masonic Village Hospice team is dedicated to maintaining the highest quality of life attainable for their patients, no matter where they may be on life’s journey.
Through the Special Moments program, hospice staff are able to do something meaningful for patients by making their end-of-life wishes come true, whether it be taking a golf cart ride around campus, going fishing or attending a family wedding.
Sonni Boyer, certified nursing assistant
Sonni once accompanied a patient to a wedding so he could experience being with family and friends on their special day.
“One of the social workers asked if anyone could drive a patient [to a wedding] in the Masonic Village van, and I volunteered since I don’t work weekends,” she said. “We drove 1 ½ hours, and I took him to the family for pictures, sat with him and helped him eat. The family really enjoyed [him being there], and appreciated it.”
The man passed away a week later, after being with his family one final time.
The joy on the faces of patients and families who experience a special moment is one of the best feelings in the world and something you can’t describe in words, Sonni shared. When she looks back at these moments, she still gets emotional.
You can help terminally ill patients complete their lives joyfully, as well as provide bereavement support for loved ones, with a gift to Masonic Village Hospice.
Do you want to make a gift from your IRA or a gift of stock? Call us today at 800-599-6454, and we can help.
“There’s a sense of gratitude and thankfulness to be a part of something I take for granted, like going shopping, attending a wedding, having a birthday cake or a delicious dinner,” she said.
“It really is the little things you don’t realize are big things in the eyes of our patients. Knowing they are on this end-of-life journey, and we’re making a difference by doing something small, it definitely makes me tear up.”
The special moments are unique because they are catered to each patient’s specific needs or requests upon admission. The team bands together to brainstorm ideas for things to do for their terminal patients.
“Our team is dedicated to personalizing each request from our patients and their families, and it’s a rewarding part of our careers,” Sonni said. “When we
Sonni Boyer
are surrounded by death and sorrow daily, seeing joy and happiness through this program makes it all worth it.
“I’ve worked for different hospices, and I’ve never heard of this type of program. I’ve never seen another hospice go above and beyond like Masonic Village Hospice does.”
Heidi
M. Young,
MSW, hospice bereavement coordinator
“Some special moments I’ve been a part of included painting a person’s nails, giving them their favorite snack or ice cream, sending flowers for birthdays or anniversaries, golf cart rides to visit friends and watching the Eagles game in honor of a loved one.
“The special moments program honors the person and gives us a glimpse of who these people are,” she said. “It puts us outside of our grief for a moment and allows us to celebrate their lives. It gives the person permission to find some happiness during a difficult time.
“It does not matter whether the special moment is big or small, as long as it’s just a beautiful gesture for patients and families to make them feel special,” she said. “It allows them to celebrate themselves and not be defined by their death, hospice admission, diagnosis, terminal illness or grief.”
Sara E. Jones, hospice RN case manager
“I only started in February, but one of my favorite moments is taking a patient out for his 90th birthday to Red Lobster because his favorite food is seafood,” she said.
“I like to be part of special moments because it gives our patients a
feeling of normalcy. Sometimes, they don’t have family to take them places, but we as staff are able to give them that experience.
“I feel joy and pure happiness when I think of these special moments. To take patients out and spoil them is an honor. To be part of what could be their last favorite thing they remember … the smile on their face makes it all worthwhile. Just because you’re on hospice doesn’t mean you don’t deserve joy and to feel loved and appreciated.”
Kevin Jacoby, social worker
“We were blessed to take one of our patients to a Phillies game, and our trip also included driving through his old neighborhood. The Phillies also honored his service in WWII by putting his name on the scoreboard, and he enjoyed a pepperoni pizza and a beer. It was a great day for him, one he talked about right up to his death, and we were honored to be along with him!
“Being able to provide opportunities for celebrations and new memories is an honor and a blessing,” he added. “It’s
admittedly difficult to work in hospice at times, as the focus is on end of life. But these special moments allow us to focus on the ‘of life’ part and bring additional joy to our patients and their families.
“They are often very surprised that we’re able to provide these opportunities, and they typically express a deep sense of appreciation. These celebrations are often the last ones our patients will experience, and it is very humbling to be a part of them.”
Heidi M. Young
Sara E. Jones
Kevin Jacoby
“Now fly away butterflies, fly as high as you can go. We’ll always be right there with you, and you right here with us, no matter where we all may go.”
Annual Butterfly Memorial Release
On a crisp Sunday afternoon in September, Masonic Village Hospice held its annual Butterfly Release at Long’s Park to honor those who died on hospice services from July 2023 to June 2024. The event has been held since 2019 to honor, celebrate and connect with families who are grieving.
The Butterfly Release is an opportunity to come together with family members, extended family, loved ones and friends. It allows all ages to remember those we lost over the past year. It also is a safe space to mourn and celebrate our loved ones with the Hospice team and family.
The event included readings from Masonic Village Hospice staff; words of welcome by Maureen DolkMetcalfe, hospice director; a blessing by Pastor Nick Keeney; music by Maya Talarico; and a children’s corner.
Although our grief journeys look different and are unique to our own losses, the Butterfly Release allowed us to connect with our grief and how it continues to impact our journey. We share in your grief, your loss, your love and your memories.
2025 Schedule
Masonic Village Campus
Feb. 5, 8:15 a.m. - 12:30 p.m. Feb. 7, 8:15 a.m. - 12:30 p.m.
Manheim Township Library
595 Granite Run Dr. Lancaster, PA 17601
June 5, 8:30 a.m. - 3:30 p.m.
Masonic Village Campus
Oct. 8, 8:15 a.m. - 12:30 p.m.
Oct. 10, 8:15 a.m. - 12:30 p.m.
Intereseted in becoming a Masonic Village Hospice volunteer? Please contact Angela Ortiz at 717-367-1121 at ext. 33024
Make Dreams Come True
This Holiday Season
4 WAYS TO SUPPORT MASONIC VILLAGE HOSPICE
JOIN THE CORNERSTONE CIRCLE
PROGRAM – Authorize a specified amount of money to be electronically transferred directly from your checking account or credit card monthly. This is the easiest form of giving, and a year-end statement makes tax preparation easy. Call 1-800599-6454 or visit MasonicCharitiesPa.org to join.
QUALIFIED CHARITABLE DISTRIBUTION
(QCD) – If you are 70½ or older, you can use your IRA to support the mission of Masonic Village Hospice. Visit MasonicCharitiesLegacy.org to request our QCD planning kit or to connect with a gift planner by calling 1-800-599-6454.
CHARITABLE GIFT ANNUITY (CGA) –
Make a gift to a charity and receive a secure stream of income for the remainder of your life while earning a sizable current tax deduction. Rates of return range from 4.6% to 10%, based on the age of the donor. Visit MasonicCharitiesLegacy.org for more information on rates or call 1-800-599-6454.
BEQUESTS –
A bequest is a gift written into a Will that is fulfilled after your death. It costs you nothing today but will have an impact on the charity tomorrow. Visit MasonicCharitiesLegacy.org for sample language and more information about bequests or call 1-800-599-6454.
VILLAGE HOSPICE
Masonic Drive, Suite 101 • Elizabethtown, PA 17022
717-361-8449 • MasonicVillageHospice.org
Who We Are
Since 2009, Masonic Village’s trained, compassionate hospice staff have cared for thousands of patients and their families, focusing on the physical, emotional, social and spiritual needs of patients so they may complete their lives joyfully. Our hospice staff promote comfort and self-determination, enabling patients to participate in making decisions about their care.
Based in Elizabethtown, Masonic Village Hospice is pleased to offer services to patients in the comfort of their homes throughout Lancaster, Dauphin, Lebanon and Eastern York counties.
