3 minute read
Is Curiosity The Secret To A Business Owner’s Freedom By Gry Tomte
I’ve been a member of a US virtual leadership group now for a few months. The very first week, we were asked to come up with a 90 day commitment. A quick 5 minute simple action that would propel us towards being the kind of leader we want to be.
I’ll be honest. I thought there’s no way a simple 5 minute daily task could do anything to further my leadership journey. But I played along anyways...
I decided my biggest pain point in becoming the leader I wanted to be and to have the freedom I wanted to have, was my very real tendency to need to control things. To “help”.
I’m pretty sure this is something most business owners can relate to. After all, it’s likely that attention to detail that made you the success you are today.
So why was it something I wanted to work on, you might ask.
Well, because if I ever wanted to a) have a week off without being glued to my phone, or b) create space for people to feel empowered to give a sh*t - then I had to change things up.
I realised that I was waaaaay too needed in my business.
In my effort to “rescue” those in need, I’d quickly jump in and give away answers like the tooth fairy gives away money.
Ie when someone needs help with the printer. Or if a challenging client requires extra input. you go on holidays (when we finally can again!) and the internet drops out...
So I made myself a commitment. Every day when I got asked a question, instead of rushing to give an answer I would approach the situation with genuine curiosity.
I’d give myself a couple of fall back questions like: “What are you thinking you might do?”.
Or: “what else can you be thinking about?”. Or: “what have you tried already that worked or didn’t work?”
When it comes to asking better questions though, there are a few common traps I’ve noticed myself falling into and that was the focus of my growth. There was 3 in particular:
1. Asking teaching/ leading questions. Asking questions as a way to “prove a point” and steer them to your solution. Because that’s very easy to do - in fact I think there’s very few things more painful to a control freak than seeing someone doing something wrong in slow motion but having the strength to let them make the mistake and not say “Aha!
I told you it wouldn’t work...”. Instead, ask learning questions. Learn a new perspective you maybe haven’t thought of before.
2. Asking why questions (“I think we should introduce a new treatment” You: “why do you want to do that?”. The implication is that you don’t think you should! 3. Asking stacked questions. You’re pretty much asking a question and giving away what you’re thinking the right answer might be all in the same go. For instance: “Do you think we should raise our prices? I mean, you know how important it is that we increase the revenue and the revenue is too low at the moment. Whats in the way of us raising the prices?”. See how that went? Stick to one question, then listen intently to the answer.
Slowly, as I started seeing the impact, I started realising that this genuine curiosity is actually a hidden super power!!
My team started problem solving, and sometimes they get it right and sometimes they get it wrong. When they get it right we celebrate the win/ achievement. When they get it wrong, we celebrate the lessons learnt in making the mistake.
That 5 minute commitment has been one of the most impactful things I’ve done as a leader.
The best thing that comes from approaching every situation with curiosity is the margin for growth is THAT much bigger. And you, my friend - can take time off knowing your business is in great hands.
