The Infinite arrives at the newly opened Blume Studios
News: Joan Higginbotham retraces her journey to space pg. 4
Music: Jason Hausman creates atmospheric soundscapes pg. 12
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BRIAN CETINA design@briancetina.com AD SALES EXECUTIVE RENN WILSON rwilson@qcnerve.com
MARKETING MANAGER
ALEX KASTANAS HOLLADAY aholladay@qcnerve.com
NEWS & OPINION
4 Shattering Ceilings by Annie Keough Former astronaut Joan Higginbotham retraces her journey to the stars
ARTS & CULTURE
6 Home Is Where the Art Is by Ryan Pitkin Bree Stallings discusses the opening of Blume Studios and its impact on local artists
8 The Writing on the Wall by Dezanii Lewis Of Earth & Sky returns for new public poetry installations 10 Lifeline: Ten Cool Things To Do in Two Weeks
MUSIC
12 Sound of the World by Jonathan Golian Jason Hausman composes soundscapes to lift installations like ‘Gaia’
FOOD & DRINK
the Optimist by Kayleigh Ruller
Hall’s loyal tenants help ring in five years of service
LIFESTYLE
Puzzles 20 Aerin It Out by Aerin Spruill
Horoscope
Thanks to our contributors: Aerin Spruill, Kayleigh Ruller, Jonathan Golian, Dan Russell-Pinson, and Dan Savage.
SHATTERING CEILINGS
Former astronaut Joan Higginbotham retraces her journey to the stars
BY ANNIE KEOUGH
Joan Higginbotham didn’t want to be an astronaut.
Despite her childhood affinity for math and science and her later prowess in aerospace engineering, the nowretired astronaut had no interest in space exploration at an early age.
Higginbotham credits the people throughout her journey who believed in her and pushed her to go further than she thought herself capable with helping her to make history as the third Black woman to ever go to space.
More than 20 years after her space flight, Higginbotham will return to space (or something like it) when she participates in the launch of Blumenthal Art’s upcoming immersive space experience, Space Explorers: THE INFINITE, set to open on Sept. 20.
Higginbotham will be there when Blumenthal helps launch every sixth grader in Charlotte Mecklenburg Schools’ into space with the help of virtual reality headsets, giving them first-person perspective into the day-to-day lives of astronauts on board the ISS.
The experience is as close as you get to going to space without leaving Earth, said Andie Maloney, Blumenthal’s vice president of education.
Higginbotham has also loaned some of her personal effects from her career in space travel to Blumenthal, including her flight suit, which will be on display in the exhibit along with a mockup of the shuttle and her childhood astronaut Barbie doll.
“For me, from an education standpoint, it really is just one of those learning opportunities that makes it tangible,” Maloney said. “Space is so ethereal and you do this and you’re like, ‘Oh, these are real people … I could be there and I could do this myself.’”
Higginbotham is living proof of that concept. She’ll be there to show the students that, although being an astronaut may seem like an out-of-this-world dream, each one of them are just regular people who may live right down the street.
Participants in the immersive experience will also view a pre-recorded video interview with Higginbotham in which she answers questions about her journey in becoming an astronaut and her experience in space.
Making inroads
As a child, Higginbotham excelled in and enjoyed math and science classes, but she never thought to turn that passion into a career until she was nearing high school.
It was after her eighth grade graduation in 1978 that Higginbotham began taking placement tests for prospective high schools. While attending an orientation for one such school, the students who had performed well on the math and science portion of the entrance exam were pulled into another room.
There, a representative of the INROADS Program introduced the students to its mission. The preengineering program supports women and minorities who may have an interest in going into engineering, familiarizing them with professionals in the field and what different jobs exist within the industry.
Before participating in the program, Higginbotham would’ve told anyone who asked that an engineer was someone who drove a train. It was through INROADS, however, that she started on her path, deciding to pursue a career as an electrical engineer.
After sticking with INROADS through her four years in high school, the program set Higginbotham up with interviews for potential internships. Two days after graduating high school, she started an internship with what was then known as Zenith Radio Corporation.
She spent her first summer with the corporation then went to intern with the International Business Machines Corporation, known as IBM, for the subsequent several summers. Higginbotham thought IBM would be her employer of choice after graduating college. She likened the corporation at the time to Google or Apple today, a place where engineers thrived.
The job they offered her, however, was in technical sales, something Higginbotham did not want to pursue.
While contemplating her IBM offer in her Southern Illinois University dorm room, Higginbotham received a call. A man from NASA’s Kennedy Space Center (KSC) asked her if she had any interest in coming to Florida to help launch space shuttles.
To Higginbotham, the offer was a potentially careerlimiting move.
On January 28, 1986, the space shuttle Challenger fractured 73 seconds into its flight, killing all seven members of its crew. Higginbotham received the call from the KSC in 1987, one year after the tragedy.
“The Challenger gave me pause when I was considering employment with NASA because I didn’t know how [much] longer they would be viable,” she said.
She flew down to Florida for an interview, though still skeptical of the agency at that point. While there, she saw the vast space shuttles and giant launch pads, which led to her decision to take a job there. She committed to five years with NASA, telling herself she would reconsider which path to take from there.
Her first role at the space center was a payload electrical engineer in the Electrical and Telecommunications Systems Division, working on the space shuttle’s electrical systems. Whatever the payload needed, whether it be heating, cooling or electricity, she had to provide the wiring for it.
Three years later, Higginbotham became an orbiter project engineer. Instead of owning one system, she owned the entire shuttle.
Still in her late twenties at that time, Higginbotham’s job was to tell the management during a flight readiness review why the shuttle was ready to fly based on her engineering know-how.
“At the time, I didn’t realize the gravity of my responsibilities and I think if I had it would have scared me out of my mind,” Higginbotham said in a broadcast from the Intrepid Museum’s Kids Week festival. “But I was having so much fun back then I didn’t realize how serious my job was.”
Dr. Mae Jemison made history as the first Black woman to go to space in 1992, while Higginbotham was working at the space center.
Although Higginbotham admired Jemison for breaking an incredible barrier, she hadn’t even considered becoming an astronaut herself. She was happy where she was, preparing the shuttles the astronauts got to fly.
“I will say that it was still a time where there were not a lot of African American women within NASA, be it in the astronaut corps or just as an engineer,” Higginbotham told Queen City Nerve.
“For most of the time that I was an engineer with NASA, I was the only Black female working on the shuttle hardware,” she continued. “So it was still kind of an anomaly… me being an engineer and her being an astronaut.”
Higginbotham’s stance on space travel shifted around eight or nine years into a stellar career with the space center. Having long surpassed her original self-imposed five-year deadline, Higginbotham’s boss convinced her to
PHOTO COURTESY OF JOAN HIGGINBOTHAM
JOAN HIGGINBOTHAM DURING HER NASA CAREER.
NEWS & OPINION FEATURE
apply for the astronaut corps. Though hesitant, her boss was not taking “No” for an answer, she recalled.
The year she applied, NASA received around 6,000 applications. When Higginbotham answered a call from Houston after a night shift at the space center, she thought the woman on the other line had made a mistake.
Higginbotham was one of just 120 applicants selected to fly to Houston, Texas, for a week-long interview process. After six months of background checks and sifting through medical data, Houston finally called to tell her the disappointing news: out of 120 finalists, 15 people were chosen to continue astronaut training. Higginbotham was not one of them.
The selection process had awoken something in Higginbotham, however, as the idea of going to space began to appeal to her more and more. She believes it was her own competitive spirit that drove her decision to keep going.
“I think the big part of it was I just never thought I’d be selected, you know,” Higginbotham said. “And the fact that I got an interview and came that darn close, I’m like, ‘Well heck, let me at least try to better myself, to see if that makes the difference.’”
Higginbotham asked the astronaut selection board what she could do to position herself as a more feasible candidate. She learned that her Bachelor’s of Science Degree in electrical engineering wasn’t considered technical enough, so she went to graduate school to obtain a Masters of Management from the Florida Institute of Technology in 1992 and a Masters in Space Systems in 1996.
Higginbotham reapplied to the astronaut corps along with 4,000 other applicants and was accepted into the class of 1996, nicknamed “The Sardines” as it was the largest class ever selected at 44 candidates.
Higginbotham packed up her things at the KSC and moved to the Johnson Space Center in Houston in 1996 to begin astronaut training.
Reaching new heights
Higginbotham underwent initial training as an astronaut candidate, or ASCAN, for between 16 to 24 months before she was deemed ready for space flight.
In 2002, Higgintbotham got a call from the head of the astronaut corps assigning her to Space Flight STS-117, scheduled for September 2003. But tragedy struck before that could happen.
In February 2003, the Space Shuttle Columbia disintegrated as it reentered the Earth’s atmosphere, killing all seven crew members, three of which were Higginbotham’s classmates. As a result of the accident, NASA stopped flying shuttles, delaying Higginbotham’s flight.
Despite the devastating loss of her classmates, the Columbia disaster did not make Higginbotham reconsider her decision to fly.
“I would think that they would want us to figure out what went wrong, to fix it and continue on with space exploration,” she said. “I know that’s what I would want if something happened to me.”
Nearly six years after being selected as an ASCAN and then coming so close to a space flight before seeing the program grounded, Higginbotham began to accept the idea that she would never get to go to space.
Though resigned to that idea, she continued training, taking a reassignment from STS-117 to Space Flight STS116, bonding with her new crew members.
Finally, on Dec. 10, 2006, Higginbotham and her crew departed from Earth en route to the International Space Station (ISS).
Her seven-member crew’s mission was to continue construction of the ISS outpost with Higginbotham as the robotic operator on the ISS arm. Her primary tasks
included setting up communications between the ISS and the ground and transferring about two tons of supplies and equipment as the load master.
Higginbotham developed a greater appreciation for two things during her nearly 13-day space mission. One of those things was the Earth itself.
“You’re looking down on Earth, 250 miles above it, and you can actually see the atmosphere, which looks like a very thin blue line,” Higginbotham said. “It made me realize just how incredibly fragile the Earth is and how much we need to be very cognizant of how we treat Mother Earth.”
She also took away a lesson about how people should treat one another. Higginbotham’s crew consisted of six other people, including one other African American astronaut, marking the first time in history two African Americans flew together.
The rest of the team was diverse, too: one astronaut of Jewish and Korean descent, one born in the UK with dual citizenship, one with parents from India, and another who was the first astronaut of Scandinavian descent.
The crew was met on the ISS by a Spanish-American astronaut, a German astronaut and a Russian cosmonaut.
“You’re looking down on Earth, 250 miles above it, and you can actually see the atmosphere, which looks like a very thin blue line ... “It made me realize just how incredibly fragile the Earth is and how much we need to be very cognizant of how we treat Mother Earth.”
Former astronaut Joan Higginbotham
Higginbotham called them the “United Nations crew” because they had a little bit of everything on board.
At some point during the mission, she was looking out the window at Earth, thinking about the discord and unrest in different regions of the world.
“I thought, ‘There are 10 of us here with a whole bunch of differences, if you will, and look how we can get along and work together for a common goal while we’re confined on this tin can of a spacecraft,’” she said. “And why can’t we do that on Earth where there’s just so much more space?”
When Higginbotham returned to Earth, she took on a role at the space station branch ensuring each module sent to the space station would fit with the existing modules on the station.
Then in late 2007, Higginbotham retired from NASA, having logged over 308 hours in space and actively participated in the launch of 53 space shuttle launches. She would go on to work in the energy business with Marathon Oil before moving to North Carolina, where she took a corporate job with Lowe’s then Collins Aerospace. She remains in the space travel industry, having opened her own aerospace consulting firm in 2022, working with organizations like Blue Origin, United Launch Alliance and the Pentagon on space-related programs.
And on Sept. 20, she’ll have a chance to revisit the space station she hasn’t seen in nearly two decades. But the most exciting part of the immersive experience for Higginbotham isn’t in reliving her glory days as an astronaut but in showing local children that they can set any goals they want, no matter how far in the clouds they may seem.
“The ultimate message that we want the students to take away from the exhibition is that with hard work and perseverance, you can accomplish whatever goals that you want,” she said. “Be it being an astronaut or whatever they aspire to be in life.”
INFO@QCNERVE.COM
PHOTO COURTESY OF JOAN HIGGINBOTHAM JOAN HIGGINBOTHAM
FINALLY IN BLUME
Bree Stallings discusses the opening of Blume Studios and its impact on local artists
BY RYAN PITKIN
Speaking to Bree Stallings, director of artistic experiences with Blumenthal Arts, in the days leading up to the launch of the 2024 Charlotte International Arts Festival, things were a bit hectic at Blume Studios.
Located at 904 Post St., in a former Charlotte Pipe & Foundry warehouse just outside of Uptown’s Third Ward, Blume Studios will serve as Blumenthal’s newest venue for continuing immersive experience series such as the Immersive Van Gogh show the organization hosted in 2021.
The new venue will kick off programming amidst the CIAF with Space Explorers: The Infinite, an immersive outer space adventure that will use VR technology to place visitors in various locations inside and outside the International Space Station.
With just two weeks until the premiere of Space Explorers: The Infinite, scheduled for Sept. 20, Stallings and her team emptied out the entire warehouse for a visit from the fire marshal, then waited for the folks with Five Studios in Montreal, Canada to arrive with trucks full of everything that was needed for the installation.
“[Five Studios] told us it’s a really quick install, and we’re like, ‘Okay, we believe you,’ and now it’s all happening,” Stallings said over the phone from Blume Studios. “So there’s a lot of hurry up and wait, and then when it’s time to go, it all happens at once.”
But the opening of Blume Studios didn’t all happen at once, it’s been in the works since January 2022 when Immersive Van Gogh ended its run at Camp North End. We talked to Stallings about that process and what impact the new facility could potentially have on the local arts scene.
Queen City Nerve: How is the facility coming along?
Bree Stallings: My job specifically has been to, as always, activate the local artist community. So we have this huge wall in the building that’s like 80 feet long and 34 feet tall at its tallest, and I had [local muralist] Cheeks just go to town on it. So he created this gorgeous cosmic mural for us as a backdrop to [renowned international installation] “Gaia.” And so it was just really sweet in this empty building to finally have something go up that feels tangible and permanent. And now, of course, all this stuff
is happening around it, but it was just this first denoted moment of being like, “Oh, okay, this is an artful place, not just a warehouse anymore.”
You mentioned your work in activating the local arts community around this event, as you did with Immersive Van Gogh. What does that work look like this time around?
We’re replicating what we did on a smaller scale with Van Gogh by having local artists come to help with selling merch. So we have the international sculpture pieces and the local artist merch, and then the way that we’ve artified the space, all of that’s free and open to the public. People can come get a drink or maybe buy something from the merch area. Maybe they’ll convert into ticket buyers, that’s the goal, but you don’t need anything to go to that space. You can just enjoy the space. I’m grateful that we get the opportunity to host this external exhibit again.
So with Van Gogh, we ended up licensing a bunch of [local artists’] work to go on to other cities. We hope to replicate that again with these shows, that they’ll take local Charlotte merch onto other places. And so my job is really to hold the hand of artists and act as a kind of client in that way. We explore those things.
And so my goal is that, through the years that I’ve been trying to do this, I’m softly working with these artists through these big, new, maybe scary opportunities for them, whether it’s making 10,000 stickers or to make this giant sculpture. They’ve never made anything like that before, but I can work as that kind, gentle client in between so that they can up-level to the next part of their career. That’s my goal. I see all of this almost like a video game. It’s like, let’s get to the next level, and we can do that for each other.
From the time when you first learned that Blume Studios was a possibility to now seeing it become a reality, about how long did that process take?
I know the exact date. It was when we closed Van Gogh [on Jan. 2, 2022]. We knew immediately that we wanted to keep doing this work. It’s part of the privilege
of my job that I get to travel and meet all these other immersive producing studios and see all these cool shows all around the world.
So you can feel this tangible percolation of all this stuff being made, all this content being made … it’s all happening at once, and people want a taste of it.
We knew that we wanted to continue to present these kinds of things, especially while the audiences were still interested. So it just took a really long time to find a building that fit our specs. We had a lovely real estate agent who worked with us, and we had all of these requirements and qualifications that we needed.
But even all these buildings that he looked through, it was hundreds of buildings, and we ended up touring like 25 to 30 with our team and with our board. And it was just this really long process, and we felt really hopeful and excited about a few of them. It was really close on some of
them, and then for whatever reason or another, it didn’t work out.
But then the folks at Charlotte Pipe & Foundry reached out to us and started that conversation, which is so funny that we were searching, searching, searching in that way, and this is the best fit, this warehouse is gorgeous, and they called us.
They own this prime real estate right there on Morehead [Street], across from the stadium that they’ve not given to anybody. They’ve not given it to the city or to [David] Tepper or anybody else. They have the power to make the choices about their land that they want, and they’ve been really incredibly thoughtful about what they want to do to develop that land to create generational change. And so it’s just really sweet to work with them and be a part of that process, too, because they really see us as Tenant No. 1 in this development process for what they want to do at the Iron District.
And they really feel strongly about it being anchored in the art. And so the fact that we’re the first thing to go there and to bring audience members into this space that people drive by all the time … It’s this huge plot of land right in Uptown. And so I think there’s a lot of curiosity about that space, but nobody ever really knows about it.
So the fact that we get to almost put our flag on the ground as the first thing and then they ask us, we’re part of these conversations about how the development should go and what makes something livable. How much green space should there be? How do we create festivals over there? How do we create programming that keeps multigenerational people excited about coming to this space? Or if they live there, what happens then?
Because all of that stuff’s coming. And so it just feels like an honor to be a part of that conversation while also seeing the first thing happening in that space.
COURTESY OF BLUMENTHAL ARTS
SPACE EXPLORERS: THE INFINITE OPENS AT BLUME STUDIOS ON SEPT. 20
ARTS FEATURE
A RENDERING OF SPACE EXPLORERS: THE INFINITE.
And what is it like for you to now be physically standing there after all that time searching and working to make this happen?
It’s joyful. I think that’s my job in general to be like, “All right, team, trust me. It’ll be cool. I can see the vision.” I fully understood what it would look like in the space as we were talking about these elements. And it’s the same way with the festival. I’m just like, “Come on, y’all. Six more months to go. It’ll be really cool, I promise.” And so there’s something about having an idea and then it coming into fruition.
I mean, that’s what an artist does, right? We think this thing up, and then it physically exists beyond our bodies. This is a very large-scale artistic process, and it’s just a joy to be on with my team, and just all this hard work, and it’s so abstract.
We’re on our computers, on our phones all day, and then there’s this tangible aspect to it and people get to come to enjoy these things. They get engaged at our venues or they’re making memories at the festival and they’re bringing their grandparents to Van Gogh. Just watching people enjoy and make sweet memories in this place that once only existed in our heads is just something that I can’t get enough of.
And you mentioned it already just a bit, but this was such a hot piece of property that has been speculated about for years. So what does it mean to you to get to win that contest and let this be an arts-activated space after so many rumors about what it would become?
We really owe that to Charlotte Pipe & Foundry and the guys there. They’re the ones who held out against all of them. Sure, that was very tempting to make those
big sales on that really precious land as they’ve watched Charlotte grow around that land for as long as they’ve been in business for all these generations. And so it’s cool to see that there’s people who have the power of patience to make a choice for the city, because I don’t know if that’s always the case.
And I think it’s just really nice to see the arts and entertainment aspect, and we’re talking about this being an entertainment district and renaming this part of Uptown and thinking about that. It’s just really sweet to think that things are changing in that way, because I think for so long, we were just trying to cater to the banks and the workers for the banks, and it’s like, no, we have to create culture in the space to make Charlotte more cool and livable and interesting.
And so the fact that the development process can have the brakes pumped a little bit so we can be more thoughtful is, I think, just an overall good sign for everybody in the city.
I think, like it or not, this is something that I think overall has a positive return for everyone. It could be a model for other developers across the city to think, “Wait, let’s slow down a little bit and think. What do we really want? Who are we catering to?”
What do you think the impact of this new Blume studio’s opening can be for the local art scene?
It’s always this marrying of international and local artists. So the international show plus international installations plus local artists selling merch. I think the power of being around those things, I think It validates the international artist in a local context … and I think it also uplifts the local artist in an all-ships-rise way.
I’ve worked really hard over the last couple of years of being at Blumenthal to create opportunities for artists to learn these things together.
THE WRITING ON THE WALL
Of Earth & Sky returns for new public poetry installations
BY DEZANII LEWIS
The Charlotte International Arts Festival is renowned for its inspirational visuals, stunning performing arts, and thought-provoking exhibits. Each program offers attendees the opportunity to view a piece of the world through someone else’s eyes, and the ongoing Of Earth and Sky public art exhibit fits that mold perfectly.
Launched in 2021, Of Earth & Sky comprises a series of large-scale public art installations located in various parts of Uptown that feature poems with accompanying artwork by local creatives.
Bree Stallings, director of artistic experiences with Blumenthal Arts, curated the exhibit, and she told Queen City Nerve she’s excited to have the exhibit back this year, setting up a new round of fresh installations following a short hiatus.
Connecting locals with international artists
The idea for Of Earth & Sky didn’t start with the arts festival in 2021; it originated in the United Kingdom. Installation artist Luke Jerram curated an exhibit that was first commissioned by the Gloucester Culture Trust in 2020.
Stallings got to meet Jerram at his studio in Bristol earlier this year. Jerram’s Gaia exhibit, an installation featuring images of the Earth’s surface measuring six meters in diameter, is currently on display at Blume Studios as part of the festival.
The placing of each installation is intentional, forcing the poem and location to work in tandem – the poem is usually related to its location and the location influences the poem.
“I had a lot of fun curating that, thinking about the things in the spaces where they were, and wanted it to speak to the place or to the building or to the history of the streets,” she said.
When the exhibit launched in 2021, over 200 poems had to be sifted through in order to be whittled down to the 45 included in the installations. This year, 25 installations were chosen from 65 poems.
The poetic installations come in a variety of shapes and sizes — you might find them in the grass or plastered to windows, one is even activated by water and only visible when it rained.
“It’s a vehicle almost because they disrupt the landscape,” she said. “They’re just so big and you can’t miss them. Or some of them are very small. I’m installing a couple of ones that maybe you have to double take and they’ll catch your eye. I like playing with the landscape like that because even when we were installing some in the bushes, people can’t help but to stop and read them.
“And I think that pause that we can give people to look at their city a little bit differently and to reflect and read these words is something really special that only public art can do,” she added.
“Luke is just a fascinating character,” Stallings said. “He has these big, major things like ‘Gaia’ and the Moon, that there’s 50 of them going around tour all over the world at one time. That’s how he makes his money. Then he uses that to work on his more interesting projects. I think he’s really figured out this true balance of artistry.”
Having the ability to work freely on other projects allows Jerram to be available for this year’s festival. He’ll meet the poets behind the old and new installations during a poetry party scheduled for Sept. 19 from 6-8 p.m. on Levine Avenue of the Arts.
The gathering will give local artists a chance to meet with folks like Jerram who have made a good living as international artists.
Each year for CIAF, Stallings also hosts an Ask the Artist Anything panel. On Wednesday, Sept. 18 from 6-8 p.m., attendees will also have the opportunity to interact with Keith Tucker, director of Megafun, an Australian public art initiative.
“It’s not just like 101 questions,” she said. “It’s like 201. ‘How do you manage these fabrication studios in multiple cities across the world? Or what happened the first time you got sued?’ And stuff like that.”
Providing these opportunities for patrons to interact with international artists is part of the goal of CIAF: to bridge the gap between local and international artists.
“I think that it validates that relationship and helps to create a stronger network,” she said.
thinking big
When most think of poetry, they think about worlds written on a piece of paper or in a book. But in order to take in the pieces included in Of Earth & Sky’s latest round, folks are going to need to think big.
Stallings pointed out that one installation on the side of Knight Theater is 32 feet long and 6 feet high.
“If you’re in and around the festival locations, including our new Blume Studios, you can’t miss them,” she said.
Several of the installations can be found along Levine Avenue and in The Green across South Tryon Street.
In the past, installations stayed up for the duration
of the festival, with a few of them staying up longer. Stallings anticipates that being the case this year as well.
“There were some that stayed up on the Mint steps for over a year,” she said. “I think that that will probably still happen. Some will just remain.”
Allowing the pieces to remain as a permanent collection may have to suffice for future projects as Stallings isn’t completely sure that they will do this installation again. The first time Of Earth & Sky was featured in the festival, the world was still reeling from COVID, so this offered a different way for people to appreciate art while social distancing.
“We were trying to find ways to activate local creatives and to create programming,” she said. “So these virtual and in-person poetry workshops were a great solution to that because it really got people together to still safely talk about these things. And those forms were incredibly indicative of COVID times.”
“It’s not that it was a theme or that we were asking people to talk about it, but I think it’s just what was on everybody’s mind,” she continued. “And so that body of work all spoke to that. And so we wanted to do this again. We’re not out of COVID times, but the world has shifted and changed since then.”
With the change comes a different perspective on the installation itself. This year asked artists to ponder, “What do you think of when you think of space?” It’s a far cry from art centered on the pandemic.
With that in mind, Stallings hopes this can be a recurring installation because people will always respond in different ways to different circumstances.
“It’s been really interesting to see just how thematically different the bodies of work are,” she said. “I can see it being something that we repeat because the community responds differently at different times to different things. It’s almost like a little time capsule of what the Charlotte creative community was thinking about at a time. And so it’s really special to see.”
DLEWIS@QCNERVE.COM
COURTESY OF BLUMENTHAL ARTS
OF EARTH & SKY INSTALLATION AT THE ENTRANCE TO BALLANTYNE’S BACKYARD.
COURTESY OF BLUMENTHAL ARTS
ARTWORK BY COREY WILSON
UPCOMING EVENTS IN THE QUEEN CITY
9/19
A CONVERSATION ABOUT ANXIETY WITH AUTHOR HALEY WEAVER
This student-led discussion will feature Haley Weaver, author of the recently released illustrated memoir Give Me Space but Don’t Go Far: My Unlikely Friendship with Anxiety. The book follows Haley’s complicated relationship with her own anxiety, eventually realizing that anxiety’s true intentions were to keep her safe, allowing her to relearn how to live without constant worry and fear. Weaver showcases coping mechanisms she relies on, using pivotal moments in her life to share a modern story surrounding mental illness. Weaver and students will explore the topic of anxiety and share her experiences and what she’s learned, providing audience members with inspiration and practical advice.
More: Free; Sept. 19; 7 p.m.; Sarah Belk Gambrell Center, Queens University, 2319 Wellesley Ave.; tinyurl.com/haley-weaver
SLAM CHARLOTTE POETRY SLAM
Slam Charlotte is a nationally recognized organization that has for decades cultivated the slam poetry scene right here in the Queen City. The group was born under the vision and direction of Terry Creech, originally starting at the AfricanAmerican Cultural Center, now the Gantt Center, in 2003. Through Creech’s desire for continued growth, Slam Charlotte strives to promote poetic growth, performance enhancement and increased community among poets through their monthly slam competitions. The upcoming competition will be hosted by Young Static (@jordan_with_da_ poems) alongside SlamCharlotte’s slammaster Bluz to celebrate the art of spoken word and hone in on the best of the best.
More: $10; Sept. 20; 7:30-10 p.m.; Nine Eighteen Nine Studio Gallery, VAPA Center, 700 N. Tryon St.; tinyurl.com/slam-charlotte
9/25 9/21 9/20 9/26 9/26
SUGARTANK! FEST 2024
To celebrate the launch of SugarTank! Records, SugarTank! Fest will also mark the release of the LGBTQ-friendly label’s first project: Carolina Compost: Volume 1. The compilations features various artists throughout Charlotte and the Carolinas, many of whom will play at the festival, with shows happening across three locations: The Gordon Street Alley, Petra’s, and Snug Harbor. Artists like Natalie Carr, Woody, Kadey Ballard, Pretty Baby and Noir Noir are set to perform, introducing the new label with a bang. Founded by local musicians Nic Pugh and Nic Holman, SugarTank! will aim to push the boundaries and continue building Charlotte’s music scene to create more opportunities for local LGBTQ+ artists in the future.
Hailing from a basement in Philadelphia, bedroom/ garage-pop and indie-rock band Bristoltooth makes a stop at The Milestone. With a fine-tuned ear for arrangement, the band balances a perfect amount of professional sound with stripped-back production. It’s been a couple years since the band released their debut album Sapovnela, but the release remains popular with fans. Their music resembles feel-good indie rock with catchy hooks while interweaving feelings of angst and grunge within their guitar tones and vocal effects. Harkening to sounds from bands like Surf Curse and Joy Again, Bristoltooth delivers a compelling, familiar sound with a darkness that only Philly bands can capture.
More: $10-$15; Sept. 25; 8 p.m.; The Milestone Club; themilestone.club
BRISTON MARONEY: ULTRAPURE TOUR PART 2
Briston Maroney, a 26-year-old singer-songwriter and multi-instrumentalist from Nashville who spent his childhood between Tennessee and Florida, began his musical career after placing as a semifinalist in American Idol’s 13th season at just 15 years old. He soon began playing house shows and refining his craft, leading to his first record deal with Atlantic Records. In 2018, he released his debut EP Carnival, which allowed his single “Freakin’ Out On The Interstate” to become platinum-certified. Today, Maroney continues to ride on the success of his indie-rock career with sold-out headline tours and standout singles like “Paradise” and “Oregon.”
More: $30 and more; Sept. 26; 8 p.m.; The Fillmore, 820 Hamilton St.; fillmorenc.com
LAUGH UNTIL IT HURTS
Crescendo Musical Comedy Improv is Charlotte Comedy Theater’s first music improv team, weaving humor and song to take you on a melodic journey of scenes and stories. Based on ideas from the audience, the quick-witted troupe finds its way to pull laughter out of any topic while still hitting all the high notes. Watch as they turn ideas and suggestions into songs, turning the mundane into musical melodies, and join in on the fun for this interactive show. It’s the last show in a run of four they’ve held throughout the city since August, so they’ll have sharpened their skills, but even if you saw one the previous gigs, the best part about improv comedy music is that each show is different. More: $7-$10; Sept. 26; 7 p.m.; Petra’s, 1919 Commonwealth Ave.; petrasbar.com
UPCOMING EVENTS IN THE QUEEN CITY
THIS IS MY BRAVE “THE SHOW”
This event series showcases stories of resilience from those who lived through experiences surrounding mental illness, substance abuse and community violence, utilizing the performing arts as a way to end the stigmas around mental illness with spoken word, poetry and music. Arkevious Armstrong, Gwendolyn Devins and Beth Gatlin will be the featured performers spotlighting individual struggles and the enduring sense of hope for others going through similar experiences. There will also be a resource fair before each show, allowing the audience opportunities to learn about programs and other helpful resources.
More: $15; Sept. 27, 7 p.m.; Sept. 28, 2 & 7 p.m.; The Parr Center, Central Piedmont Community College, 1201 Elizabeth Ave.; tinyurl.com/this-is-my-brave-the-show
ONGOING MON SAT
FTS MUSIC FESTIVAL
SUN
AFRIQUE EN CIRQUE
9/29
Created by Yamoussa Bangoura and inspired by daily life in Guinea, Afrique en Cirque shares the beauty, youth and artistry of African culture in a colorful show that goes beyond scenery, costumes and staging to make any theatre vibrate with energy, representing the strength, agility and joys of young Africans. Expect to see acrobats execute gravity-defying moves and human pyramids, accompanied by the contemporary sounds of live Afro-jazz, percussion and kora. The Montréal-based Kalabanté Productions mixed traditional Guinean and other African cultures with North American circus performances for this unforgettable show. “Explosive drumming and dance routines, the group delivered mind-blowing acrobatic sequences with extraordinary precision,” read one review in Vice Magazine. More: $15 and up; Sept. 29, 7 p.m.; Knight Theater, 430 S. Tryon St.; blumenthalarts.org
9/28
Hosted by For The Struggle, Inc., a local nonprofit dedicated to fighting systemic issues of racial and social injustice, the FTS Music Fest will bring a full day of soul music to Concord’s Route 29 Pavilion. Performers include Lyfe Jennings, Keke Wyatt, The Ton3s (formerly known as The Hamiltones), Curt Keyz, Venegas, DJ T.O., DJ Frosty, DJ Shaun Nyce, Leah Simone, Erin Blue, Money Train and AngieP. Aside from those performances, there will also be a range of cuisines from food trucks and bars available at the site, plus plenty of opportunities for community engagement and resources. Mr. Jay Woods and Power 98’s No Limit Larry will host the event, ensuring a high-energy atmosphere throughout the day.
For its 10th anniversary, the critically acclaimed comedy show that swipes through live dating app profiles is coming to the Queen City. If you aren’t familiar with the show, the audience gets heavily involved by voting on whether or not host Lane Moore should swipe left or right, as she provides her own blistering brand of social commentary throughout the night. Tinder Live regularly hosts special guests like David Cross, David Koechner and Jon Glaser, just to name a few. The show is celebrating its 10th year with improvised comedy, dating app dos and don’ts, eccentric profiles and more.
Jason Hausman composes soundscapes to lift installations like ‘Gaia’
BY JONATHAN GOLIAN
Dreamed up by the minds at Blumenthal Arts, the Charlotte International Arts Fair (CIAF) has become an annual celebration within the Queen City that dedicates several weeks of operation to imaginative visual arts, interactive displays, and captivating musical showcases, inspiring folks of all ages and providing real depth for folks with desire to explore the festival’s many angles.
Since the festival’s second year, local musician, sound designer and composer Jason Hausman has been at the center of CIAF’s axis, working together with Blumenthal to provide soundtracks to many of its bigger public installations.
Hausman began partnering with the festival in 2022 with the “Man” installation, a large-scale, inflatable and modernized interpretation of Auguste Rodin’s “The Thinker” sculpture, created by Australian artist Amanda Parer and set up in Ballantyne’s Backyard.
Musically, “Men” was composed of two opposite tracks — one that played during the daytime and another for night. Working with Derel Monteith, Hausman wove serene soundscapes into the installation, driven at times by keys and drums, but always moving back to a sea of atmospheric echoes that worked to pacify listeners, taking them to their own secluded imaginative places to ponder and wonder at the world around them.
Hausman returned in 2023 for a different type of exhibit: “Sky Of Bubbles,” which was displayed over Levine Avenue of the Arts. Looking up into the luminescent globes, during the day, one might be reminded of the
lighthearted moments in childhood, in chasing the blown liquid globes with neighborhood friends and family.
At night, the many parts of the display were lit up, covering the alleyway they occupied with bright shades of pink and blue. Hausman crafted the soundtrack to this piece with local artists Troy Conn (guitar), Emily Sage (vocals), and Monteith (keys), sending up an equally fluffy and uplifting collaborative piece that only adds to the jubilance of the exhibit.
From ‘Men’ to ‘Gaia’
Queen City Nerve joined Hausman in his Hot Sake studios on a recent afternoon to hear his next piece for inclusion within CIAF. He has created a soundscape this year for the installation of ‘Gaia,’ a large globe created by international artist Luke Jerram that may look familiar to Charlotteans as it has hung suspended over Founders Hall in years past.
“It’s a big, giant Earth, lit from within,” Hausman described. “[The piece will be] hung from the ceiling, and it rotates very slowly, so they wanted a space that just felt good.”
Hausman said he aimed for pensive vibes with uplifting moments spread throughout, similar to the history of the actual globe we’re all living on.
“[I wanted] to have a little humanity in it, heavenly even, those kind of moments,” he said.
Listening in, the draft of the soundscape does take on those elements and then some. There’s an ethereal quality to how the track is pieced together. Looking over
the long monitor sitting to the rear of his desk, hovering slightly over a slightly smaller one, I was guided through many of the layers that stretched on to various degrees.
For the heavenly quality, Hausman connected again with Sage, to add vocals. Admittedly, I had imagined Sage coming into the studio and singing certain notes, but I was shocked to see a more technological process at work. Hausman isolated Emily’s vocal layers for me, then started hitting a few notes on the keyboard, bringing forth different pitches in her voice.
“This is basically granular synthesis,” he described, “so I can basically go in and tweak how I want these things to sound through the pad, flutter, and reverb, I can add as much of [the qualities] I want and as less.”
Hausman had instrumentalized one of our best local vocalists to fit her into the soundscape. He moved through the layers again to present another surprise, grinning as he uncovered certain sounds hidden in the project’s depths.
“I took a blue whale sound and put it into a synth, and now I can perform it,” he said, carrying out the action as he described it.
“There’s a plug-in that I just go and mess with, and,” as he explained while pointing at different layers within the music program, “I can create random generation stuff here, and then I put it through Portals [another program], and if I turn off Portals alone, you’ll start to hear this more heavenly section.
Having heard the parts of the whole, nothing was lost in again immersing myself in the full final product. Presented with only a slight portion of the influences, the longform track gives off a sort of radiance to the mind in how the elevated tones hit the ears.
There are string pieces woven in, doused to the point where the sound is indistinguishable from its origin, and when placed alongside Emily’s voice, they come together in a minor but stunning collision that sounds viscerally religious.
There’s so much about Hausman’s “Gaia” composition that is subtle, but when opened up and dissected becomes mind-blowing. His soundscape is not just an ode to the exhibit at this year’s CIAF, it is an homage to the sphere we call home.
Following CIAF, audiences can watch Hausman at work as he plays with his band, The Shallow Sea, on Oct. 10 at Stage Door Theater.
INFO@QCNERVE.COM
REWIND: CLT’S NEW MUSIC RELEASES
SINGLE
NERVOUS SURFACE - “SHUVVIT”
An incredibly fun, short single with a runtime of 1:40, “Shuvvit” is a song that screams to others, “I really couldn’t care less.” With a fast tempo, upbeat rhythm, and funky chords the single almost reads like a taunt of sorts. In its playful essence and the natural bounce of the track, I couldn’t help but want to chant “nana-nana-boo-boo.” Stream on Spotify
SINGLE
DAYTONA - “AUNT PHETAMINE”
With a strong foundation in the country genre, Daytona mixes the classics of the folky sound with beach-pop from the 1960s. You can’t help but bob your head to the groovy tune of the track, which features the sounds of steel guitar, a gritty tone, and treble-heavy guitar licks. Stream on Spotify
SINGLE
MY SISTER MAURA - “SURFING”
Raleigh shoegaze band My Sister Maura reels back their typical fuzziness in this stripped-back track. Serving as an A-side to a double single, “surfing” captures the crashing waves and serenity when walking along the shore. The haunting and low-key vocals carry the song forward, leaving you wanting more. Stream on Spotify
JASON HAUSMAN IN THE STUDIO
PHOTO BY JONATHAN GOLIAN
REWIND: CLT’S NEW MUSIC RELEASES
SINGLE
DYLAN INNES - “BRISTOL (BUSINESS VERSION)”
With a voice and sound similar to John Mayer, singer-songwriter Dylan Innes seeks to challenge the notion of what it means to be an authentic artist. “Bristol” is a song that Innes wrote about five years ago. This version is a remake that accurately displays Inne’s current sound. With hints of blues sprinkled throughout the track, the tasteful bass lines and rich vocal melodies make for a solid addition to the artist’s discography. Stream on Spotify
SINGLE
YESTERDAY’S CLOTHES - “MIND AT EASE”
Hailing from the scenic views of Asheville, Yesterday’s Clothes is a four-piece, alt-rock band that expresses a deep love for music and passion for the outdoors. Their ambient sound is littered throughout “Mind at Ease,” with twinkling tones and reverberated vocals that comfort the listener like a blanket from the night sky. Stream on Spotify
SINGLE
BLANKSTATE. - “THIS SPIDER’S THREAD IS MINE, WHO SAID YOU COULD CLIMB IT?”
Fully throwing themselves into the emo-adjacent genre, blankstate. embraces its new energetic, powerful sound with intricate guitar riffs, blaring drums, and heart-wrenching vocal melody. With a dynamic sound unlike others within the Charlotte scene, blankstate. is a band whose performance and constant reinvention is a force to be reckoned with. This single is a good indication of the band’s future success outside of NC’s borders.
Stream on Spotify
SINGLE
CIGARETTES @ SUNSET - “HUSKIES”
“Huskies” is a beautifully stripped-back country song that rides on the strumming of an acoustic guitar; the raspy voice of the band’s singer, Wells; and a graceful melody complemented by a violin. Drawing heavy inspiration from the Blue Ridge Mountains, Cigarettes @ Sunset interweaves the sounds of their hometown Boone in every note they play.
Stream on Spotify
SINGLE
VANESSA SCHEFF AND EMILY SAGE“HYPNOTIZED”
“HYPNOTIZED” is a stunning track drenched in the smoothness that soulful music provides. The vocal layering and harmonies provided by Scheff and Sage, combined with a jazzy melody from a trumpet, create a luscious track that will leave you in a daze. The pacing of the single takes you on a journey of tension, with a buildup that executes a satisfying resolution.
Stream on Spotify
SINGLE
GALLOWAY - “HEAT”
Described as an alternative, indie-pop band based out of Raleigh, Galloway delivers a pop-indie anthem with “Heat” as a perfect way to say goodbye to summer. The chorus is reminiscent of 5 Seconds of Summer’s 2015 run, highlighting bright guitar tones and heartfelt vocals that emphasize belting and borderline yelling to drive the angst home.
Stream on Spotify
SINGLE
LAWN ENFORCEMENT - “DUST STORM”
Utilizing the power of silence within music, Lawn Enforcement delivers a perfect slow-core song that’s reminiscent of bands like deathcrash and Duster. Their mix of post-punk, slow-core and shoegaze makes for a dynamic song. Capturing the calm that comes before the storm, the swirling of the guitar melody kicks up the dust that creates a whirlwind during the chorus.
Stream on Spotify
DISTRACTED EYES (TOP) AND WITH HASTE! AT SNUG HARBOR, 9/4/24
David Gillespie w/ Landon Byrd, Tylor Hill (The Milestone)
POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
La Brava w/ The Bleus, DapYP (Snug Harbor)
EXPERIMENTAL/MIXED-GENRE/FESTIVAL
Papa Srapa (VisArt Video)
COVER BANDS
Heart Breaker (Heart & Led Zeppelin tribute) (Middle C Jazz)
OPEN MIC
Singer/Songwriter Open Mic (The Rooster)
Singer Songwriter Meetup & Variety Open Mic Show (Starlight on 22nd)
THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 19
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Garcia Peoples w/ Country Westerns (Evening Muse)
Read-Only Time Travel w/ The South, The Cocker Spaniels, Hiroshi Jaguar (The Milestone)
Hootie & the Blowfish (PNC Music Pavilion)
JAZZ/BLUES
Kaleo (The Fillmore)
Mike Phillips (Middle C Jazz)
COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA
Blue Ridge Band (Comet Grill)
A Thousand Horses w/ Mary Kutter (Neighborhood Theatre)
HIP-HOP/SOUL/R&B
Montell Fish (The Underground)
FUNK/JAM BANDS
Coconut Groove Band w/ David Gibson (Goldie’s)
FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 20
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Augustana w/ verygently (Amos’ Southend)
Encre Noire w/ Bongfoot, Those Dogs, The White Horse, Once Below Joy (The Milestone) Moonshaker w/ Bath Party, Ego Death Machine (Petra’s)
Whores. w/ Thousandaire, King Cackle (Snug Harbor)
POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
Ivy Lab: Infinite Falling Part II (Blackbox Theater)
Damian C. w/ WAG (Camp North End)
Freaquency360 House Music Dance Night (Starlight on 22nd)
COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA
Virginia Man w/ Cinema Stereo (Evening Muse)
Cody Johnson (PNC Music Pavilion)
FUNK/JAM BANDS
Pluto 4 Planet w/ RC Roadshow Duo (Goldie’s)
The Council Ring (Smokey Joe’s Cafe & Bar)
JAZZ/BLUES
Noel & Maria feat. Ray Greene (Middle C Jazz)
SINGER-SONGWRITER/ACOUSTIC
Alec Benjamin (The Fillmore)
The Soundwave is Queen City Nerve’s comprehensive guide to live music happening in Charlotte every night of the week. This list is pulled together by our editorial team every other week from combing through Charlotte music venue calendars and separated by genre. None of these listings are paid advertisements. We understand that many non-traditional music venues offer live music like coffee shops, breweries, art galleries, community events and more.
This list may not have every event listed. To have a venue included in the editorial compilation of this list, please send an email to info@qcnerve.com with the subject “Soundwave.”
The Mark Rapp Quintet (Middle C Jazz) LATIN/WORLD/REGGAE
No Te Va Gustar (Neighborhood Theatre) ¡Tumbao! w/ Likkle Slave (Snug Harbor)
FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 27
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
The Lenny Federal Band (Comet Grill) Mikaela Davis Band (Evening Muse) KAZHA w/ Magg Dylan (Evening Muse)
Fleshgod Apocalypse w/ Shadow of Intent (The Underground)
Sacrificial Betrayal w/ Headcell, Charlotte Revival (The Rooster) JAZZ/BLUES
The Pedro Martinez Group (Booth Playhouse) Joanna Connor (Neighborhood Theatre)
Blue Dog Junction (Smokey Joe’s Cafe & Bar)
Keirsten Alexandria & Cory (Visart Video)
HIP-HOP/SOUL/R&B
Wake Moody w/ XOXOK (Camp North End) COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA
Bourbon Sons w/ Rod Fiske (Goldie’s) CLASSICAL/INSTRUMENTAL
Charlotte Symphony: The Wizard of Oz in Concert (Belk Theater)
POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
Medium Build w/ Annika Bennett, Josh Gilligan (Amos’ Southend)
Eazybaked (Blackbox Theater)
Dayglow (The Fillmore)
Sidequest: A Hardcore Rave Night (The Milestone)
Ultraviolet Sapphic Dance Party (Petra’s) COVER BANDS
September In The Park (Earth, Wind & Fire and Chicago tribute) (Middle C Jazz)
Tribute (Allman Brothers Band tribute) (Visulite Theatre)
The Grass Is Dead w/ Josh Daniel (Visulite Theatre)
SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 28
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Galloway w/ Emerson Bruno (Evening Muse)
America (Ovens Auditorium)
The Used (The Fillmore)
Family Video w/ Iamdynamite, Complaint Club (Petra’s)
The Red Pears w/ Ultra Q, The High Curbs (Snug Harbor)
JAZZ/BLUES
The Pedro Martinez Group (Booth Playhouse)
Tierney Sutton & Tamir Hendelman Duo (Middle C Jazz)
POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
Adventure Club (Blackbox Theater)
Digital Noir w/ DJ Spider (The Milestone)
The North Carolina Polka Time Allstars (Primal Brewery)
Beatfreaq (Starlight on 22nd)
COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA
Lyle Lovett and His Large Band (Knight Theater)
Taylor McCall (Evening Muse)
Noah Floersch (Neighborhood Theatre)
FUNK/JAM BANDS
The Broad Pickups (Smokey Joe’s Cafe & Bar)
SINGER-SONGWRITER/ACOUSTIC
Dave Desmelik (Birdsong Brewing)
Paul Bradley Atkinson (Comet Grill)
Simple Sole w/ Ryan Trotti (Goldie’s)
LATIN/WORLD/REGGAE
Southern Guitar Festival & Competition (Stage Door Theater)
La Santa Grifa w/ Dharius (The Underground)
The Soundwave is Queen City Nerve’s comprehensive guide to live music happening in Charlotte every night of the week. This list is pulled together by our editorial team every other week from combing through Charlotte music venue calendars and separated by genre. None of these listings are paid advertisements. We understand that many non-traditional music venues offer live music like coffee shops, breweries, art galleries, community events and more.
This list may not have every event listed. To have a venue included in the editorial compilation of this list, please send an email to info@qcnerve.com with the subject “Soundwave.”
EXPERIMENTAL/MIXED-GENRE/FESTIVAL
Make Peace Fest (The Rooster) FAMILY
The Jolly Lollies (Camp North End) COVER BANDS
Shot Thru the Heart (Bon Jovi tribute) (Amos’ Southend)
SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 29
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Hunter Roots w/ Fo Daniels (Neighborhood Theatre)
Extreme Metal Mass (The Rooster)
HIP-HOP/SOUL/R&B
Wale (The Fillmore)
Joeyy (The Underground)
JAZZ/BLUES
Omari & the Hellhounds (Comet Grill)
Pride ensemble feat. H. Wade Johnson (Middle C Jazz)
POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
Hazy Sunday (Petra’s)
Soul Sundays feat. Guy Nowchild (Starlight on 22nd)
LATIN/WORLD/REGGAE
Matute (Ovens Auditorium)
Southern Guitar Festival & Competition (Stage Door Theater)
SINGER-SONGWRITER/ACOUSTIC
Andy Ball (Goldie’s)
MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 30
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
The Beaches (The Fillmore) JAZZ/BLUES
The Bill Hanna Legacy Jazz Session (Petra’s) COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA
Charlotte Bluegrass Allstars (Smokey Joe’s Cafe & Bar)
OPEN MIC
Find Your Muse Open Mic (Evening Muse)
TUESDAY, OCTOBER 1
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Red Rocking Chair (Comet Grill)
Jinjer w/ Hanabie, Born of Osiris (The Fillmore)
Mike Baggetta & Peter Distefano w/ w/ Thousand Dollar Movie (Snug Harbor)
POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
ZHEANI (The Underground)
COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA
Clem Snide w/ Rye Valley (Neighborhood Theatre) COVER BANDS
BEAT (King Crimson tribute) (Knight Theater) OPEN MIC
Open Mic Night feat. The Smokin J’s (Smokey Joe’s Cafe & Bar)
VISIT QCNERVE.COM FOR THE FULL SOUNDWAVE LISTING
EVER THE OPTIMIST
Optimist Hall’s loyal tenants help ring in five years of service
BY KAYLEIGH RULLER
Optimist Hall — Charlotte’s first food hall situated in a revamped 1892 cotton textile mill — celebrated its fiveyear anniversary in August. In Charlotte time, that’s kind of a big deal.
Hyped as Charlotte’s first modern-day food hall when it opened in 2019, it’s clear that management is doing something right. During its five years in operation, the tenant retention rate at the mixed-use development has remained at nearly 100%.
Against the backdrop of a Charlotte food and beverage scene that is constantly turning over, Optimist Hall stands proudly — all 20-plus food stalls, three dine-in restaurants, and 60,000 square feet of it.
Andres Kaifer, the Charlotte chef behind beloved Elizabeth eatery Customshop, is set to open the Spanish small-plate stall Marina’s Tapas in Optimist Hall this fall. He said the hall “just makes sense.”
To him, it’s seamless and clean with a good flow.
“It’s got a very diverse and very unique offering from a food hall perspective,” he said, calling Optimist Hall the opposite of “stagnant.”
With space for 650 people indoors and outside, free WiFi and free parking for the first hour and a half of any visit, the massive structure in an old gingham mill in north Charlotte’s Optimist Park neighborhood has become a goto for appeasing lunch cravings, hitting happy hours, and showing off to out-of-town visitors.
The diverse food lineup includes Mediterranean options with Mezeh, a New York-style Jewish deli with Schreiber’s on Rye, Cuban food from Suarez Bakery, Indian at Botiwalla, Ethiopian at Enat, a range of Asian cuisine from Zukku Sushi to fan-fav (and Kaifer fav) Dumpling Lady, and soon Spanish with Marina’s.
Even with the abundance of choices, returning guests aren’t often playing a guessing game when they walk in. They’ve already done the roaming, trusting where their palate will guide them.
The guest perspective
One regular we spoke to, Diamond Johnson, known by friends and clients as “Diesell,” has honed her own Optimist Hall ritual.
Johnson said she always goes straight to the Spindle Bar, orders the Miami Vice (a mixed strawberry daiquiri and pina colada drink) then picks up the chicken miso
ramen from Bao and Broth. She’ll sit down at a picnic table on the outdoor patio and do her work as a wardrobe stylist, founder of Styles by Diesell.
“I come in to do style boards with my clients,” she described. “Even seeing people here is motivating. I see the way people dress.”
This makes sense; Optimist Hall was voted by Queen City Nerve’s readers as the Best Spot for People Watching in 2023.
Peak people-watching occurs because it’s, quite simply, a bustling, busy spot for all types of people. Corporate-core tech guys from Duke Energy come for lunch. Freelancers freelance. Foodies eat. Drinkers drink. Kids kid.
With the plethora of refreshingly eclectic cuisine options, it’s an obvious spot to take big groups (each with their stubborn personal preferences) and out-of-towners.
“It’s always one of the first places I take people when they come to visit… It’s a good intro to Charlotte,” said Johnson, who was dining with her brother who was in from out of town when we spoke to her. “There’s literally something for everyone here … Ethiopian, Indian food … I love the diversity of it.”
It’s nice to have a place to show off Charlotte, like a slight cultural flex. “Look here Person Visiting Charlotte, we have really cool, really diverse food vendors and oh, look, it’s all walkable and you can sit outside and you can even get a cocktail.”
Optimist Hall itself has a long and storied history in Charlotte. Built in 1892, it operated for decades as a textile mill and pantyhose factory, heavily reliant on Black labor. Having continued to operate at some level until 2015, White Point Partners and Paces Properties purchased the property in 2016 with plans to transform the site.
According to Merritt Lancaster, an Optimist Hall partner, balancing the historical context with modern goals “was an incredibly complicated process. Not only were we taking an old manufacturing facility and turning it into a food hall and office, but we also used historic tax credits to offset the cost. This meant that aside from the inherent complexity of the conversion, everything we did had to be approved by the National Park Service,” he said. With a hope that the building lasts another 100+ years, Lancaster believes the development “captured and preserved the beauty of the old building and gave it a new lease on life.”
Alongside the actual guests with diverse backgrounds that find themselves buying from one of the two dozen food stalls, there are sanctioned events like Eat, Gay, Love, an annual Thanksgiving dinner launched by Billy Sunday and Queen City Nerve that has taken place at Billy Sunday’s Optimist Hall location in recent years.
“It’s very gay friendly, which is super good for me,
coming from a city where it’s super open,” Johnson shared, having recently relocated from DC to Charlotte with her partner.
The customers may also see their non-cooker-cutter selves and tastes reflected in the food options. “I think people want to support the smaller businesses that are trying to tell their stories,” Kaifer said.
As both an upcoming tenant and an avid Optimist Hall guest himself, Kaifer said he’s drawn to Optimist’s commitment to local, small-business tenants with stories.
The tenant perspective
“A lot of independent operators opened up their first business out of Optimist Hall. To me that was attractive,” Kaifer said. “It gives people an outlet to give something a shot without as much risk as a brick-and mortar … They gain traction and popularity and are able to grow as business owners.”
Harriet’s Hamburgers, serving up one of Kaifer’s favorite burgers in town, is one of those joints that leaned into Optimist Hall as a promising starting point then expanded.
Harriet’s — with its pared-down menu of stunning smashburgers — opened in 2020, the COVID times, hailing from the same team behind neighboring Papi Queso, a melty grilled cheese stall that started as a food truck and has been a staple of Optimist Hall since 2019.
“Optimist Hall is the perfect place to launch a new brand. It’s a more controlled environment,” said Shelley Odom, one of the stall’s founders. As of August 2024, Harriet’s has a shiny new standalone location at the Bowl at Ballantyne, busy with both a new and loyal following from Optimist.
But, Optimist Hall is also a great place to move into for already existing culinary leaders like Kaifer. To start,
AN EVENING ON THE LAWN AT OPTIMIST HALL
PHOTO BY THE PLAID PENGUIN
LARRY SCHREIBER PHOTO BY ANDREW THOMAS LEE
FOOD & DRINK FEATURE
opening a 400- to 600-square-foot spot is much more approachable — and affordable — than endeavoring to open a whole restaurant, according to Odum.
“It wasn’t a very difficult decision. We knew the business would be there,” Kaifer said. “We just have to execute at a high level.”
That is the standard that seems to seep through with each of the tenants we spoke with: an emphasis on high-level execution and individual brand identity that complements and blends with the curated, somewhat formulaic mosaic of food stalls.
Curating those tenants is a huge aspect of Optimist’s work, according to Lancaster. “We spend a lot of time on the front end of our leasing process identifying the type of tenant we want, ones that we believe will add value to the overall experience and in turn benefit from being part of Optimist Hall,” he said.
Sharing the load
With aligned tenants, the Optimist leadership team takes care of a large chunk of PR and marketing and event efforts, like hosting pop-ups with The Charlotte Vintage Market or even just scattering corn hole set-ups for guests. Ultimately, these efforts bring in a consistent crowd.
Even expanding retail options like dreamy gift-andhome shop The Merchant or Archer Paper Goods are promising ways to keep people strolling in. One of the best plant shops in Charlotte, Paradiso, is tucked away in the back corner.
Larry Schreiber, who owns both Bao and Broth and Schreiber’s on Rye, said, “Optimist Hall is the destination.” He’s a voice to trust, having been open from the very start — August 1, 2019. Bao and Broth was one of two savory spots available on opening day, with a line so long he says his “Yelp hasn’t recovered.”
The nature of Optimist Hall being a “destination” has benefitted him over the years, helping to eliminate the heavy lifting of individual marketing efforts or pulling teeth to get customers through the door. The weight is partially off the shoulders of chefs and business owners so they can focus on the product and the customers.
“I see every customer coming up,” said Schrieber, a long-time chef used to being in the kitchen. “You don’t get that in a restaurant.”
The thousands of people, or as Schreiber would call “a lot of eyeballs,” are what make the steep rent — which can be well above South End prices and includes paying both a base rent and a percentage rent — worth it. It was enough to convince im to open his second stall, Schreiber’s on Rye, in December 2023.
The power of fun
One undeniable aspect about Optimist Hall is a simple one: It’s just fun. The food is fun, events are fun, tenants are generally jazzed to be there.
“We really all root for each other … when one business is shining, it shines light on all of us,” Odum said. From her standpoint, tenants aren’t dragging their feet; people want to drive business forward and they want to be an active, energized part of what’s happening.
That translates into the guest experience.
“I do think that there is a want for more delicious, more accessible food … something more creative and fun for people. And I think Optimist Hall is a great outlet for that,” Kaifer said. “We can serve delicious things on little paper boats and nobody cares because you’re at a food hall.”
But, it’s not just the food and the tenants that give Optimist Hall a more playful air.
For one, the brand messaging is clear. It’s Instagram profile photo is a smiley face, lighthearted and magnetic. Smiley faces run rampant at Optimist Hall — in shades of yellow, pink, blue and green. The name is literally Optimist.
Getting slammed by COVID while not even through its first full year, the Optimist team took a grim situation and turned their new development into “Charlotte’s biggest drive-through,” according to Odum.
They also employed the cleaning staff to “to help run food from each of the tenants down to the circular drive,” instead of pursuing lay-offs, Odum shared.
Optimist Hall took a traditional idea of a food hall, modernized it, revamped, or rather, adaptive reused it, and arguably set a trend — or a gold standard — in the Queen City. But, it’s not the only food hall in town anymore.
Food halls like Monarch Market, circa November 2023, and Urban District Market, opened in April 2023, have popped up following Optimist Hall’s opening. Other mixed-use, adaptive-reuse developments have sprung up as well, like Lower Tuck in Wesley Heights and Camp North End.
More recent development announcements include Charlotte Pipe and Foundry Co.’s Iron District, with retail, residential and office space between Uptown and South End, and the West End’s upcoming Savona Mill.
“We have a lot more competition now with other food halls, versus having zero when we opened,” Schreiber expressed. “I would like to stay consistent.”
Optimist Hall doesn’t plan on falling back into the shadows, however. As Optimist Park and the surrounding neighborhoods — Belmont, Villa Heights, NoDa, etc. — continue to develop around the food hall, Lancaster predicts an upcoming need for “hospitality, senior housing, and perhaps some more boutique office spaces … We have the opportunity to develop some of our surrounding property in the future.”
For now, there are no immediate plans, though, except to “continue to strengthen our current tenants and when possible add new categories and operators.”
Hopefully, even with potential growth on the horizon, Optimist Hall can still feel like home for the Charlotteans like Diamond “Diesell” Johnson who shape the space.
INFO@QCNERVE.COM
LIFESTYLE PUZZLES
SUDOKU
BY LINDA THISTLE
TRIVIA TEST
BY FIFI RODRIGUEZ
CROSSWORD
1. GEOGRAPHY: Mount Vesuvius overlooks which modern Italian city?
2. MYTHOLOGY: What kind of creature is half bird and half woman with an alluring song?
3. SCIENCE: What is a common name for iron oxide?
4. FOOD & DRINK: What kind of pastry is used to make baklava?
5. MOVIES: What is the name of Elle’s chihuahua in “Legally Blonde”?
6. MEDICAL: What is a common name for bruxism?
7. LITERATURE: Prospero is a character in which of Shakespeare’s plays?
8. ASTRONOMY: How many stars make up the Big Dipper?
9. U.S. STATES: Which state’s nickname is The Sunflower State?
PLACE A NUMBER IN THE EMPTY BOXES IN SUCH A WAY THAT EACH ROW ACROSS, EACH COLUMN DOWN AND EACH SMALL 9-BOX SQUARE CONTAINS ALL OF THE NUMBERS ONE TO NINE.
10. ANIMAL KINGDOM: Which is the only continent without bees?
When my high school bestie left me a FaceTime voicemail asking if I wanted to be her +one for a charity event, I sat on the invitation for over a month.
Am I the only introvert who immediately hears “networking” and “stuffy” when someone says “fundraiser?” The invitation, luckily enough, painted quite a different picture:
“You are invited to immerse yourself in an evening of intrigue and elegance at our Garden Party in White in the Garden of Good and Evil.
‘Truth is stranger than fiction,’ and on this enchanting night, we invite you to be part of a tale woven with charm and mystique’...
By invitation only: Garden Chic in White attire
We anticipate a night filled with whispered secrets and southern grace, just as in Savannah’s fabled squares.”
White after Labor Day and an exclusive peek into the garden of Eden that is the who’s who of the Queen City and beyond? It was giving peak Brat summer finale and a warm welcome to a very demure, very revolutionary fall.
Just like that, my interest was piqued. Like Eve, I had to take a bite of the apple.
If you know you know, but if you don’t it’s because you weren’t invited (for 40 years!). Every year, in September, the Farewell to Summer (FTS) Foundation hosts the largest LGBTQ+ fundraiser in North Carolina.
In true rebel spirit, the all-white dress code pays homage to the event’s subversive roots, blending non-conformist elegance with a bold commitment to advocacy and a dash of mystery.
My dark Halloween heart craved a chance to dress up like Valak, the sinister nun wearing all black in The Conjuring. I opted to be a “good girl” and squeezed into what I described as a “hot little white jant,” a backless maxi.
But my Spanx said, “Tell the truth, shame the devil,” as I attempted to conceal the decadent lifestyle of the Greek goddess I tried to embody. Pillowy princess in white and gold it is.
As we entered the roundabout at the Mint Museum on Randolph Road during sunset, I felt an excitement akin to entering the pearly gates. High-energy rhythms pulsed, strobe lights danced, and bubbles swirled into the sky as we stepped out of our Uber and into the Garden of Good and Evil.
In the center of the massive museum lawn, a giant posh tent waited patiently for the swelling crowd of partygoers clad in cream and “theme” to indulge at the open bar. The shared energy of fly-as-hell attitude, gratitude and, of course, servitude — which could be immediately felt and permeated every nook and cranny we walked toward.
Speaking of servitude, this year’s beneficiaries were two Charlotte-based nonprofits, RAIN (Reaching AIDS Information Network), which is dedicated to supporting individuals affected by HIV/AIDS; and Time Out Youth, a safe space and organization that offers programs, services and support for LGBTQ+ youth.
My girlfriend introduced me to her plug, Jamie Hildreth, a childhood friend. As fate would have it, he was also the chair of the Social and Beneficiary committees for the FTS Foundation, and I had 1,000 questions!
Much like every fairy tale has heroes, villains, and marginalized figures, my new friend Jamie gave me the BTS on the FTS Foundation and its story of how a radical few turned grassroots activism into a million-dollar revolutionary ritual that you can only experience if you make the list!
Me: How did this event come about?
Jamie Hildreth: This event started in response to the AIDs epidemic. People were suffering and no one was doing anything about it. So the gay community came together to try and solve [the problem]. The first garden party was in 1984. A group of friends [began hosting casual] backyard [fundraisers] each September [encouraging] their guests to wear white. Three years later the group decided to formalize the event, officially establishing the Farewell to Summer Foundation…Since then, the event has grown in size and popularity [raising a million dollars for beneficiaries selected by the FTS Board].
Why white?!
Wearing white began as a cheeky response to the fashion trend of not wearing white after Labor Day. It was a small but symbolic way of [resisting] the mainstream societal restraints against the LGBTQ community at the time.
How does one get invited?
It’s a strict invitation-only private event. One is invited to the party by one of the board of directors who pay for 100% of the organization’s operational costs. In return, the guest is encouraged to donate to one of the selected nonprofits at the event. This also means that 100% of the donations from the event go to the selected charity.
If your invite got lost in the email (again) this year, start putting in work connecting with peeps who made the list before next year. It’s truly one of the most magical fundraisers I’ve ever attended.
P.S. The theme for next year isn’t out yet, but if you get the urge to embrace the extreme, do it! I stalked both a demon wearing horns with head-to-toe red body makeup and a white Venus fly trap oddly doubling as a visual representation of ”forbidden fruit.”
INFO@QCNERVE.COM
WEARING WHITE AFTER LABOR DAY IN PROTEST
PHOTO BY AERIN SPRUILL
FAREWELL TO SUMMER PHOTO BY AERIN SPRUILL
A PEAK INSIDE THE INVITE-ONLY AFFAIR
PHOTO BY AERIN SPRUILL
ARIES (March 21 to April 19) Careful, Lamb. Taking on too many tasks at one time can cause you to create more snarls each time you try to work your way through the tangled mass. Best to handle one job at a time.
TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) Making bold moves is what Bovines do. But the best moves are made with lots of data to provide backup, just in case you charge into an unexpected complication. Meanwhile, a new relationship shows promise.
GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) Sharing credit for a job welldone is easy for you to do, but this is not necessarily the case for your partner. But fair is fair. Don’t let yourself be denied the right to have your contributions recognized.
CANCER (June 21 to July 22) Communication is important to help bridge a gap that can lead to problems at home and/or at the workplace. Find a way to get your points across before the breach becomes a chasm.
LEO (July 23 to August 22) Relationships, whether business or personal, need to be watched carefully for signs of trouble. Any negative indications should be dealt with before they become too burdensome.
VIRGO (August 23 to September 22) Congratulations! A more positive aspect highlights much of the Virgo’s week. You should find others more receptive to your suggestions and more likely to act on them.
LIBRA (September 23 to October 22) All work and little play could wear down the Libra’s usually positive attitude. Take some much-needed time off. Perhaps a short jaunt with someone special is the way to go.
SCORPIO (October 23 to November 21) This is a good time to expand your view from the known to the unfamiliar. Confronting new situations could be challenging, but they could ultimately be extremely satisfying.
SAGITTARIUS (November 22 to December 21) Giving advice to those who just want validation for what they’re doing can be unsettling. So, back off and save your counsel for those who really appreciate it.
CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 19) Cultivating a more positive attitude not only makes you feel better about yourself, but it also has an upbeat effect on those around you, especially a certain someone.
AQUARIUS (January 20 to February 18) Keeping the lines of communication open and accessible is the key to establishing the right foundation to build an important and meaningful relationship. Stay with it.
PISCES (February 19 to March 20) Before agreeing to act on a request, consider using your perceptive Piscean talents to see what might lie hidden beneath the surface and possibly cause problems later on.
BORN THIS WEEK: You’re a friend who, if you err at all, does so on the side of concern for those you care about.
ARIES (March 21 to April 19) After much traveling this year, you’re due for some relaxed time with family and friends. Use this period to check out situations that will soon require a lot of serious decision-making.
TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) Keep that keen Bovine mind focused on your financial situation as it begins to undergo some changes. Consider your money moves carefully. Avoid impulsive investments.
GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) You’ll need to adjust some of your financial plans now that things are changing more quickly than you expected. All the facts you need haven’t yet emerged, so move cautiously.
CANCER (June 21 to July 22) Personal and professional relationships dominate this period. Try to keep things uncomplicated in order to avoid misunderstandings that can cause problems down the line.
LEO (July 23 to August 22) That elusive goal you’d been hoping to claim is still just out of reach. But something else has come along that could prove to be just as desirable, if only you would take the time to check it out.
VIRGO (August 23 to September 22) This is a good time to get away for some much-needed rest and relaxation. You’ll return refreshed and ready to take on a workplace challenge that awaits you.
LIBRA (September 23 to October 22) Confidence grows as you work your way through some knotty situations. Watch out for distractions from well-meaning supporters who could slow things down.
SCORPIO (October 23 to November 21) Consider spending more time contemplating the possibilities of an offer before opting to accept or reject it. But once you make a decision, act on it.
SAGITTARIUS (November 22 to December 21) You’re in a very strong position this week to tie up loose ends in as many areas as possible. Someone close to you has advice you might want to heed.
CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 19)
Congratulations! This is the week you’ve been waiting for. After a period of sudden stops and fitful starts, your plans can now move ahead without significant disruptions.
AQUARIUS (January 20 to February 18) You’re in an exceptionally strong position this week to make decisions on many still-unresolved matters, especially those involving close personal relationships.
PISCES (February 19 to March 20) The week starts off with some positive movement in several areas. A special person becomes a partner in at least one of the major plans you’ll be working on.
BORN THIS WEEK: You work hard and get things done. You also inspire others to do their best. You would do well heading up a major corporation.
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UPCOMING SPECIAL ISSUES
OCTOBER 16 | ELECTION GUIDE
NOVEMBER 13 | BEST IN THE NEST
DECEMBER 11 | NEW YEAR’S GUIDE
DECEMBER 25 | PRINT BREAK
SAVAGE LOVE ROLE PERVERSAL
Exploring kinks two decades in
BY DAN SAVAGE
After 19 years together, my husband and I have finally managed to have a really good conversation about our desires. We both struggled to nail down what it is we want — he is a long-term Catholic guilt sufferer — but got to talking about what porn he likes. Turns out he’s into these coercive type scenes, things like, “I caught your shoplifting, eat me out or I’ll call the cops!” and “You can’t make rent? Let me fuck you and we will call it even!” type stuff. He says it’s less about what the action actually is (the sex acts themselves) and more about the power exchange going in either direction (sometimes he fantasizes about being coerced, sometimes he fantasizes about doing the coercing).
Now that sounds hot as hell to me — I’m more of a reader of erotica and I tend to go for free use/MFM stories — but we have a few issues to deal with:
1. He doesn’t find the idea of treating me badly hot because he loves me, whereas in the fantasy situation he doesn’t care what the other party thinks. I hate the Madonna/whore thing, so that was frustrating to hear.
2. Neither of us enjoys role play. We’ve tried it but the effort of playing a character and improvising really takes us out of the moment. Obviously, it’s hard to play any of the type of scenes we’re talking about without getting into role play.
Is there anything we can do to take this dynamic and play with it as ourselves? We’ve got two young kids at home so our time for anything spontaneous is very limited.
RECENTLY EXPLORING NEW THINGS
“It takes a lot of guts to express a new sexual desire 19 years in, and I want to congratulate them for putting it all out in the open,” said Claire Perelman, a licensed therapist who works with couples seeking to improve their sexual connections. “The possibility of feeling rejected by our lovers — or ourselves — can make it so challenging to be that vulnerable. RENT and her husband are a great reminder that you never know how excited your partner might be about trying something new!”
I agree with Claire because of course I agree with Claire: It’s great that you two are finally having this conversation… but I gotta say… this was a conversation you should’ve had 18.5 years ago, RENT, six months into your relationship. (I
checked with Claire about this, and she agreed with me.)
You’re not alone in putting this convo off; a lot of us avoid having honest conversations about our desires and/or kinks early on because we fear derailing a promising new relationship. But these conversations get harder the more time passes, not easier, because being rejected by someone we’ve fallen love with is scarier than being rejected by someone we just met. Now, very few people wanna be with someone who blurts out all of their kinks on the first date/hookup (not even other kinky people), RENT, but by the six-month mark — ideally — those kink cards should be face-up on the table.
Okay, RENT, so you’ve finally had this conversation — you now know about your husband’s kinks (does he know about yours?) — but these aren’t fantasies you can realize together. Not just because your husband has one of those annoying Madonna/whore hangups, but because realizing his fantasies would require you to engage in role play, and that’s not something either of you enjoys. And since this is a fantasy scenario that can be ethically explored through role play, your husband — who can’t do role play — has accepted that this fantasy of his can never be realized with anyone, ever.
So, where do you go from here?
“When engaging in kink, it’s helpful to understand what about the kink excites you,” said Claire. “RENT’s husband identified that it’s not about the sex acts, it’s about the power exchange. There’s lots of ways to play with power dynamics outside of role play, degradation and humiliation.”
In other words, RENT, you can’t explore your husband’s very specific “but you must pay the rent!” fantasies, but you might be able to explore and enjoy other sex-undera-mutually-agreeable-degree-of-duress scenarios that work for both of you.
“First, RENT and her husband could try watching the porn he enjoys together,” said Claire, “playing with the fantasy before playing with each other. They could also negotiate ‘free use’ scenes that include both their interests. If they agree on a set time frame where RENT’s husband can make sexual demands, they could incorporate the transactional nature of the sex he fantasizes about while accommodating the scheduling constraints of parenthood. For example, they could agree that after RENT’s husband helps the kids get to sleep,
RENT can’t refuse her husband’s demand for a blowjob that helps him to get sleep. There are a lot of creative avenues for this couple to take that aren’t Madonna or whore, but an entirely third path that they can figure out together.”
Follow Claire Perelman on Instagram and Threads at @ sexclarified.
I’m a 28-year-old woman who reads your column out loud every week with my 24-year-old hottie Italian boyfriend. We feel like you’ve been answering a lot of grim questions lately about sad relationships! So, we’re writing in with something fun! I love to be tied (don’t use “tied up,” Dan, it’s just “tied”), and my vanilla boyfriend encourages me to get that need met in our rope community. I’m a yoga instructor and have the stamina required to endure really elaborate Shabari suspension scenes. I want my boyfriend to get suspended with me sometime! We would make a beautiful and very sexy work of bondage art! While I engage in some light sexual play with the men who tie me (“forced” orgasms mostly, sometimes oral service), bondage doesn’t have to be sexual, which means my boyfriend doesn’t have to pretend it’s a turn on for him or do anything sexual if he were to get tied with me — but if he was inspired to do something sexual (or allow something sexual to be done to him), that would be great — he just has to hold (or be held in) the position (which he’s good at because he practices yoga, too) while photos are taken. He says he’s “indifferent, not opposed,” but has refused to give me a definitive yes or no answer. But he said he would do it if you told him to. So, Dan, please tell him to!
BOYFRIEND ONLY NEEDS DAN AMAZINGLY GENTLE ENCOURAGEMENT
P.S. We also listen to your podcast!
My first impulse was to ask why your boyfriend didn’t treat your request like an invitation to play? Not “play” in
the sense of sexual adult game (not role play, not kink play), but “play” in the sense of childhood games like Cops & Robbers or Cowboys & Indians. But then it occurred to me that adults your age didn’t grow up playing Cops & Robbers (with plastic handcuffs) or Cowboys & Indians (with improvised lassos), as those aren’t games kids with helicopter parents would be allowed to play. They’re also not games kids should play (pernicious copaganda, racist tropes), and they’re not games kids who grew up with smartphones and those far less problematic first-person shooter games were even interested in playing. Anyway, in the spirit of play — and in the spirit of indulging his girlfriend — I think your boyfriend should get suspended with you, BONDAGE, provided he doesn’t have an unstated aversion to being slowly hoisted into the air with hemp ropes by a man with tattoos and topknot who’s wearing Peruvian draw-string pants. (I follow a bunch of Shabari practitioners on Instagram, BONDAGE, I know the look.)
But you have to promise — once your boyfriend is off the ground — that you won’t try to initiate anything sexual. Even if you think your boyfriend is aroused. You will also make sure the person doing the tying understands that this is a non-sexual/non-sensual session, which means no avoidable touching in your swimsuit areas and no suggestive banter. You’re clearly hoping your boyfriend might find that he enjoys bondage in the same way you do, BONDAGE, but if you don’t want his first bondage experience to be his last, don’t try to take this from bondage + photo shoot to bondage + “forced” orgasms. If your boyfriend winds up enjoying the experience in a sexual and/or sensual way, you can explore that the next time he agrees to get tied with you. But if you initiate something sexual the first time — even if he becomes aroused — he may wind up feeling manipulated and/or violated after it’s over (refractory periods can be unpredictable), BONDAGE, and there won’t be a second time.
