Immersive ‘Kudzu’ production explores impact of gentrification on communities
By Dezanii Lewis
overseas pg. 12
Food & Drink:
Brewery perseveres through turbulent first year pg. 16
Music: Anna Elise LaFrance finds success
Panzú
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF RYAN
ANNIE KEOUGH
akeough@qcnerve.com
DEZANII LEWIS
dlewis@qcnerve.com
ART DIRECTOR
BRIAN CETINA
brian.cetina@gmail.com
AD SALES EXECUTIVE
RENN WILSON rwilson@qcnerve.com
MARKETING MANAGER
ALEX KASTANAS HOLLADAY aholladay@qcnerve.com
NEWS & OPINION
4. Nerve’s Guide to CLT Tennis by Justin LaFrancois & Allen Gowin Where to play and what to expect
6. Beyond the Written Word by Matt Cosper Book Buyers celebrates 25 years in east Charlotte ARTS
8. The All-Consuming Growth by Dezanii Lewis Immersive ‘Kudzu’ production explores impact of gentrification on communities
10. Lifeline: Ten Cool Things To Do in Two Weeks
MUSIC
12. Jumping Continents by Jonathan Golian Anna Elise LaFrance finds success in theatre, launches music career in UK
12. Rewind: New Releases
13. Pause: PULSE Xperience
14. Soundwave
FOOD & DRINK
16. A Mint Hill Oasis by Annie Keough Panzú Brewery nears one year in business despite early struggles
LIFESTYLE
18. Puzzles
20. Nerve Endings by Pamela Grundy 21. Horoscope 22. Savage Love
Thanks to our contributors:
Matt Cosper, Jonathan Golian, Dan Russell-Pinson, Jeff Hahne, Kim Hardy, and Dan Savage.
THE NERVE’S GUIDE TO CLT TENNIS
Where to play and what to expect
BY JUSTIN LAFRANCOIS & ALLEN GOWIN
Yes, we know, you’re sick of hearing about pickleball. But did you know that, coming out of the Olympics and for years before that, the old-school game of tennis has also been on the rise?
The Williams sisters started a surge in popularity among women of color, helping to diversify what was once a lily-white sport, then COVID came through and boosted the demand even more.
According to the 2024 U.S. Tennis Participation Report, the percentage of the US population that played tennis at least once in the course of a year bounced from 5.8% in 2019 to 7.7% in 2023 (that’s 23.6 million people).
As part of our Need to Know series, in which we take questions from readers about any old thing that’s on their mind regarding city infrastructure, history and the like, one reader complained that there was no thorough resource for tennis players to know what sports were worth visiting. So we took it upon ourselves to compile just such a resource below — and yes, pickleball is included.
We enlisted the help of Charlotte City Tennis to compile this guide, so we thank them. Consider signing up with the organization for local recreational and skill level clinics from beginner through advanced. You can also check out more at bit.ly/mecktennis.
WHERE TO PLAY TENNIS IN CHARLOTTE
SUGAW CREEK PARK
941 W. Sugar Creek Road
Number of courts: 6
Lights: Yes, but only 1-3 work
Reservation: Yes
Rating: 3 out of 5
as the courts are used less frequently than other larger parks in the county. The courts don’t offer much shade as the sun crests to the west side of the park without much tree coverage until late afternoon; right-handed players will serve into the sun on the far side of the courts and left-handers on the near side (from the parking lot).
All of the nets are in fair condition but the courts are currently cracked most of the way through the service boxes and no-man’s land, with grass and weeds sprouting in some spots. The availability and accessibility of these courts on the north side of the city earn it a 3 out of 5, but the county could put some effort into the lighting situation and resurfacing. There are viewing benches outside of the playing area, but not in the bank of courts. A hitting wall is located on court 6.
FREEDOM PARK
1900 East Blvd.
Number of courts: 10 tennis courts, 6 pickleball courts
Lights: Yes
Reservation: Yes
Rating: 3.5 out of 5
Located in the heart of the city, Freedom Park has two banks of tennis courts and one bank of pickleball courts. One bank is on the corner of East Boulevard and Maryland Avenue with dedicated parking off of East. This bank is open for public reservation. It is also the bank of courts the county contracts to Charlotte City Tennis (CCT) to run junior and adult public tennis programs. CCT has donated benches on each bank, and there is a good amount of tree covering in the afternoon for shade. There are no bathrooms for the bank of courts. Players need to walk into the center of the park to access restrooms.
TENNIS HAS SEEN A RISE IN POPULARITY SINCE COVID HIT.
the park are located by the soccer fields and are accessible through the main entrance to the park off East Boulevard. These courts are not nearly as well maintained and have windscreen issues. They are available for walk-up play on a first-come, first-served basis. There are six pickleball courts here that are new and in very nice condition. They are available to be reserved.
PARK ROAD PARK TENNIS CENTER
6215 Park Road
Number of courts: 12 tennis courts
Lights: Yes
Reservation: Yes
Rating: 3 out of 5
Park Road Park Tennis Center is a 12-court facility located off of, you guessed it, Park Road. The entrance is across the street from the main entrance to Park Road. Eight courts are available for reservation online while four courts are available for walk-up play — first come, first to serve. USTA league play, school teams and public tennis programs offered through CCT all share use of the eight reservable courts. During the weeknights and weekend mornings, it can be very crowded with a long wait to access the free courts.
JEFF ADAMS TENNIS CENTER
1200 W. Tyvola Road
Number of courts: 13 tennis courts
Lights: Yes
Reservation: Yes
Rating: 4 out of 5
Located on Sugar Creek Road in north Charlotte, Sugaw Creek Park is a great place for a walkon game of tennis or pickleball
Jeff Adams Tennis Center is the tennis portion of Renaissance Park, located in southwest Charlotte. Courts 1-4 and 13 are available for walk-up play. Courts 5-12 are reservable online, but are sometimes reserved for USTA league play and instruction by CCT. The courts are in decent shape with minimal cracks, though the lines are starting to fade. Courts 1-4 have the most shade during the morning time.
This facility is not busy during the morning and early afternoon on weekdays. Weeknights and weekend mornings are popular for instruction, league play and walk-up play so getting a court can be tough. The bathrooms have been renovated, but the water fountain has been inoperable for months. This has potential to be one of the nicest facilities in Charlotte, but the neglect of facilities by the county prevents it from reaching its potential.
FIVE POINTS PARK
200 French St.
Number of courts: 2
Lights: No
Reservation: No
The courts are in good condition, but the windscreens need attention. The best times for walk up or reservation play are mid afternoon during the week and during the afternoon/evenings on weekends. The bank of four courts in
There is one teaching court surrounded by a fence that has adequate shade throughout the day. The remaining 11 courts can be exposed to the elements, and there is a lack of windscreens. The county maintains bathrooms, a water fountain, and a gazebo with picnic tables adjacent to the courts. Limited trash cans means trash gets left on the courts regularly.
Rating: 4 out of 5
Five Points Park is a quiet and tucked away park in the Five Points neighborhood between Rozzelles Ferry Road and Brookshire Freeway near Johnson C Smith University.
ADOBE STOCK
NEWS & OPINION FEATURE
There are only two courts at this park, but they are in rather pristine condition. There is great shade coverage in the afternoon on the court nearest the parking lot as the sun starts to set in the west behind large trees adjacent to the courts.
These courts are not reservable and are available on a first-come, first-served basis. There are no bathrooms at this location. There are no noticeable cracks through the courts and the lines are in fairly great condition. Sometimes you may come across pickleball lines that have been drawn in chalk and there is a lot of fallen leaves and dirt collected near the fences from run-off after the rain. There is only one bench near the courts and it is located outside of the playing area.
ALEXANDER STREET PARK
739 E. 12 St.
Number of courts: 6
Lights: No
Reservation: Yes
Rating: 4 out of 5
Alexander Street Park is a small neighborhood park located just off of I-277 near the Villa Heights and Belmont neighborhoods. There are six courts that have recently been resurfaced, but those get a lot of play at any time of the week, but we expect the lines to fade over time. There are no lights or restrooms at this park, and it can be difficult to find an open court for walk-on play at times. You can make reservations through the county website, though some courts are reserved on specific days for instruction.
Do not expect much shade during the daytime hours. The fledgling trees around the courts are not tall enough to provide any coverage. The sun crests on the southwest side of the park where there is no tree coverage at all.
Shade starts to come into courts later in the afternoon near the baseline on the parking lot side. A lot of pickleball players frequent this park and it can be loud with a lot of balls rolling onto neighboring courts during play. The fences extrude slightly on either side of the court to maintain tennis balls in your play area which can be helpful in avoiding running them down behind other players. These are very good quality courts and would receive a 5 out of 5 rating if not for the lack of lighting, shade and public facilities.
11220 Golf Links Drive
Number of courts: 20
Lights: Yes
Reservation: Yes
Rating: 5 out of 5
MASON WALLACE PARK
7301 Monroe Road
Number of courts: 8
Lights: Yes, but for only courts 1-4
Reservation: Yes
Rating: 4 out of 5
The two tennis court banks at Mason Wallace Park on Monroe Road near Matthews are completely surrounded by tree coverage, offering great shade in the mornings and afternoons for match play. The trees are large, mature and dense and offer a valley of relief from the heat of direct sunlight. Many of the more popular courts in the Charlotte area provide blue courts with green borders, but Mason Wallace offers green courts with a clay-red border, which provides a change of scenery, at least.
There are viewing benches outside of the fence surrounding the courts, with a grassy sloped bank for viewing if friends or family wanted to set up a picnic to watch your match. There are no benches inside of the playing area, though. Courts 1-4 are set up side-by-side with lights available and courts 5-8 are set up in two-bytwo quadrants with no lights available. The courts are pretty worn and with minimal cracks, though the crack repairs are visible throughout the play area and borders.
VETERANS PARK
2136 Central Ave.
Number of courts: 6
Lights: Yes
Reservation: Yes
Life Time is a private club in the Ballantyne area with membership running around $300 per month or $100 for a day. This place feels like a resort and offers 10 indoor and 10 outdoor tennis courts. Outdoor courts are a mixture of hard courts and clay courts and everything is wellmaintained with coolers of water available throughout the space and shoe cleaners for when you get done with your match or practice on the clay courts.
If you can find a member to play with, you can access the indoor courts for a guest fee of $15 and the outdoor courts for free. There’s also a shop on site. The outdoor courts do not offer much shade during the daytime hours since the courts face north/south and the sun moves right overhead without many trees on the east/west sides of the court banks. There are covered benches at each court for some relief during the day.
Rating: 4 out of 5
Veterans Park in the Plaza Midwood neighborhood is a very popular park for tennis in Charlotte. The county keeps these courts surfaced well and the nets are in fair condition. The courts are reservable online through the county website and courts 1 and 2 are often reserved for instruction after school hours.
The courts face north/south so the sun comes directly overhead most of the day with no tree coverage on the east side of the courts, though there is good tree cover on the north and west sides. The lights make play easy into the night hours before the park closes. Each court has a long bench for storage and rest between sets and there is a hitting wall on court 2 for practice.
Visit qcnerve.com for a more comprehensive list that includes pickleball courts, businesses, groups and lessons. INFO@QCNERVE.COM
LIFE TIME
PHOTO BY JUSTIN LAFRANCOIS
THE FIVE POINTS PARK TENNIS COURTS
BEYOND THE WRITTEN WORD
Book Buyers celebrates 25 years in east Charlotte, becoming a community hub along the way
BY MATT COSPER
Richard Rathers has been many things: a rehab counselor, a coal miner, a teacher here in the United States and abroad. But for most Charlotteans, at least those with a literary bent, he is known as the owner and operator of Book Buyers, which is among the last of the proper used book shops in Charlotte.
And as of August, he’s been filling that role for the last 25 years. Right by his side the whole time has been his daughter Lee Rathers. In terms of local, homegrown literary culture, the Rathers’ are indispensable. And, quite befitting the proprietors of a bookshop, they are a couple of characters.
When we met recently to chat about the store’s history, Richard was dressed in an understated Hawaiian shirt (is such a thing possible?) and his affect was laconic but firm. He has the confidence of a classroom teacher, of a man used to organizing, encouraging and convincing people.
Lee is the more energetic of the two, with curls and big spectacles topping an easy smile. She lets her father take the lead in our conversation, but stays connected and engaged the whole time, offering points of clarification or diverting us toward an anecdote from the store’s history — or from Richard’s lifelong journey toward becoming, in his own words, “an ideal book seller.”
Lee’s mother, Pam, died just shy of Lee’s first birthday, so the story of the Rathers has been a father-anddaughter adventure, with Lee following Richard through the Deep South, broken up by stints in New Jersey and Utah (that’s where the coal mining took place) as well as a year spent in East Anglia, England.
They landed in Charlotte in the 1990’s. Richard taught physical science at Harding University High School in west Charlotte. During our conversation, which took place a few doors down from the shop at Cafe VisArt, he said, “I was looking for something to do on the weekends, as if I didn’t have papers to grade, and I ran across a book called How to Start and Run a Used Bookstore. I read it — and I read it again.”
He spent much of his free time thereafter hitting up yard sales and auctions wherever he could find them, collecting about 10,000 books over a two-years span.
Book Buyers opened their doors in Plaza Midwood
at the corner of The Plaza and Central Avenue in August 1999. The Rathers quickly found that the neighborhood was hungry for a book shop. Before they’d even had their grand opening, while still setting up the shelves and stocking inventory, people would knock on the door and ask when they could come in.
You’ve just got to love book people.
Over the next 20 years, the Rathers duo became foundational to the neighborhood, a resource for bibliophiles and cat lovers alike. The shop’s cats are wellknown and beloved. Currently there are three: Junior, Inky and Deena.
Those three are generally friendlier than the original shop cat, the late great Paige, who was donated to the shop as a kitten by a gentleman living in the alley out back. Paige was gorgeous but not exactly cuddly and, despite a very clearly worded warning sign at the front of the shop, she took more than her fair share of blood tribute from shoppers who tested her good will.
In 2011, Lee opened a shop within a shop at Book Buyers. The Greener Apple consists of a small section toward the front of the book shop and offers vegan goods, things to eat and things to wear.
While they share physical space, they are two separate businesses. This detail seems important to the Rather clan when we talk, whether that’s for tax reasons or issues of familial boundary-setting is anyone’s guess. If only someone had thought to ask them in the context of an interview…
But I digress, and as I am entirely unqualified to judge the merits of vegan goods, I won’t. The snacks seem nice and are displayed in an aesthetically pleasing fashion. If you have questions you should go in and ask Lee. You just might find yourself wondering the halls three hours later asking yourself how you got there.
Forced to move
The unfortunate thing about doing something special and cool in a neighborhood where other imaginative and hardworking people are doing cool things is that eventually the vultures show up and begin the oh-soimportant work of extracting every last possible cent of
value from a given territory in the name of our lord and savior: Capital.
As it goes in South End and NoDa, so it goes in PlazaMidwood. Some businesses manage to hold on, and some get priced out.
While I wasn’t in the least perturbed to learn of the departure of a certain dreadful sushi restaurant (sometime can we please talk about how that place must have been a front for heroin operations, because there is no way a sushi joint that bad could stay in business for that long), but I was genuinely upset when I learned toward the end of 2021 that Book Buyers wouldn’t be able to stay in their Plaza Midwood home. I feared the worst.
Happily, the Rathers team — Richard, Lee and the
integral Virginia O’Riley, who’s been there nearly since the beginning — is one made up of resilient navigators. With the help of an army of volunteers and a fleet of trucks, they landed on their feet.
They opened the doors at their new location in Eastway Crossing in February of 2022. Nestled in the Coolest Strip Mall in America™ amongst a motley crew of local businesses including VisArt Video, Tommy’s Pub and Open Door Studios, Book Buyers has weathered the storm by focusing on the essentials: The Books, The Cats, The People.
Amazon accounts for roughly half of all book sales in America in 2024. Their dominance has even laid waste to big brick-and-mortar chains like Borders or WaldenBooks; it’s been even rougher for the small independent
PHOTO BY RYAN PITKIN
THE BOOK BUYERS TEAM (FROM LEFT): VIRGINIA O’RILEY, RICHARD RATHERS, LEE RATHERS
PHOTO BY RYAN PITKIN
A HOMEY NOOK IN THE BACK OF THE SHOP.
NEWS & OPINION FEATURE
operations. However, they do have a secret weapon that the big guys don’t: Customer loyalty for a place like Book Buyers can be fierce
When asked about online sales, Richard Rathers seems flatly uninterested. Based on Amazon’s ability to underprice books they have effectively cut other sellers out of the game. There is no way to make it profitable. But this doesn’t seem to be the real reason for the lack of interest.
It’s an issue that simply doesn’t seem to be what interests the Rathers (or, for that matter, Richard’s long time companion Virginia, whose design and mastery of its labyrinthine layout is unquestioned). It’s about people coming into the store and discovering what they need, maybe even what they didn’t know they needed. After all, you can never pet a cat on Amazon.
It’s a more relaxed and organic experience than much of our algorithmically entrained daily lives and it’s good for us; it scratches a certain dormant hunter-gatherer instinct. There is exquisite pleasure to be found in letting one’s eyes wander over the spines of the books, the background chatter of other customers a sort of incidental music to accompany the pursuit of that obscure object of desire: the book that is looking for you just as you are looking for it.
This is the magic of bookstores. You don’t have this experience online. You can only have this experience in person. In real time. In the real world.
Much like that other ancient and storied source of pleasure, the brothel, used book stores know they can always count on those customers who might be described as Specialists. Richard describes with relish acquiring caches of books on engineering, programming, and other niche topics like a treasure hunter might discuss the horde of Agamemnon or Tutankhamun’s Tomb.
Talking about one recent acquisition, he mentions a “shelf full of books on chess.” At this, Lee jumps in with a smile: “Oh, we love chess. Just two days ago a guy bought a stack of those chess books. When I priced them I said, ‘They are not going to stay for very long,’’ and sure enough… They know they better buy them now because they aren’t going to stick around.”
As someone who has a group chat with friends to alert each other of new arrivals at Book Buyers, I can relate to Chess Guy.
More than just books
On one recent visit to the store I spoke with another customer, a professor of Greek and Latin whose tastes straddle the line between the arcane and the mundane.
During our conversation, Dr. Johnson provided what seems like a typical Book Buyers customer profile: “I’ve been going since I moved here in 2017, back when they were in Plaza Midwood and I probably go three or four times a month. First I head straight to classics, then crime, then general fiction, then sci-fi. I know I’m probably
going to walk out of there with multiple books even if I swear I’m just going to browse.”
Regular customers and the community they create are what keep the doors open. During the same visit when I spoke with Dr. Johnson, I heard multiple distinct groups coming in and discussing the store’s book club — books
they’d read, what they were reading next, and how much they’d enjoyed the conversation.
It was a fascinating testament to the community magnetism of a good bookstore. These were wildly different people, at least at first glance, and it seemed like the only thing they really had in common was Book
Buyers.
Even though it has been baked into the shop ethos since the beginning, as Lee has taken more and more responsibility for the store she seems to be leaning into Book Buyer’s role as a community center. Since moving to Eastway Crossing, the shop has been hosting more events.
In addition to the book club there have been author readings, including a pair of grand opening events in June 2022 featuring the luminous Amy Bagwell and fellow poets Xavia Miles, de’Angelo DIA and novelist Jeff Jackson.
The Rathers have also cultivated a successful partnership with WDAV, through which Book Buyers plays host to the radio station’s pop-up record sale. The next one is scheduled for Aug. 24 from 10 a.m.-2 p.m. There is a real center of gravity to Book Buyers, and one gets the impression that in an unpretentious and ultimately very grounded way, Richard and Lee understand that at this point, after 25 years, Book Buyers is an institution.
In a city where the tension between organic culture and corporate simulacra is palpable, I don’t feel I’m overstating my case when I say that Charlotte needs Book Buyers.
INFO@QCNERVE.COM
PHOTO BY RYAN PITKIN
THE NEW LOCATION OPENED FEBRUARY 2022
PHOTO BY RYAN PITKIN
GRAB SOME MERCH ON YOUR WAY OUT.
ALL-CONSUMING GROWTH
‘Kudzu: A Story of Belonging’ explores the impacts of gentrification on communities
BY DEZANII LEWIS
The housing crisis is a topic that almost every demographic can relate to in some context. Whether directly or indirectly, most people have been affected by it and have much to say about it.
And while that remains the case, it’s people of color and other vulnerable communities who are most impacted by this wide-reaching and ever-growing issue.
With its new production, Kudzu: A Story of Belonging, local Black-led artist collective Mixed Metaphors Productions explore what it means to call Charlotte home, combining theatre, music and art to inspect the intersection of housing justice and home.
Mixed Metaphors Productions (MMP) is the same company that brought FixaPlate and SwimCap to Charlotte’s introspective theatre patrons, constantly experimenting with nontraditional, immersive ways to better draw the audience in and engage with a subject rather than allow themselves to be passive observers.
Partnering with QC Family Tree (QCFT), a neighborhoodbased community development organization located in Enderly Park, where members and allies strive for social justice, Kudzu takes just 10 attendees per showing through and around the QCFT house on Parkway Avenue, exploring the many sides of the housing justice issue.
“They will encounter characters that represent the different facets and realities of ‘Charlotte’s housing crisis,’ which we always air quote because the term crisis makes it sound like it’s this thing that came out of nowhere, and we didn’t know, and we don’t know what’s happening, and it’s like, it doesn’t come out of nowhere,” MMP cofounder Kat Martin explained to Queen City Nerve.
“It comes out of historical realities. It comes out of policy. It comes out of choices,” Martin continued. “We can actually trace how we got here. We hope that by exploring this Enderly Park home, immersing themselves in each of the rooms is like its own installation because the home was built in 1930, so it’s just a big loop.”
Attendees will move through the house encountering characters like The Person Packing, who has been given 90 days to vacate their home, or The Flipper, who knows how to spot “good bones.”
The choice to host the production at the Enderly Park home offers more than just symbolism, placed in a historically Black neighborhood that has recently become
a hot spot for real estate agents and house flippers like those portrayed in the play.
According to Martin, it also provides a certain closeness that helps audience members engage.
“For our work, intimacy is key,” she said. “Because of the immersive nature where we really are dropping you into the story, the immediacy that happens in hyperintimate settings is really key to activating people.”
Putting on the production in an actual home offers a more profound adventure for attendees.
The fact that the home is part of QC Family Tree, an organization that helps challenge the housing crisis here in Charlotte, adds another layer to the production, Martin said.
“You are going to see an actor that is performing a piece, but they’re going to be in a room that’s giving Jumanji vibes,” she said. “The ability to tie together performance and full installation, that’s what we are always trying to do. We feel like this is maybe one of the best examples of our work and of our community partnerships.”
The vine that ate the South
True to their name, Mixed Metaphors Productions drew the title for the production from the history of the kudzu vine, an invasive plant that was introduced to the US from Asia in the 1930s.
“It became the vine that was going to save the South,” Martin said. “The government actually paid people to plant kudzu to help to fight against soil erosion. Everybody thought that cows and everybody’s going to just eat it up. They’re going to love it. People were using almost religious terms that the South was going to be saved and borne from this kudzu plant.
“Then it grows about a foot a day, and cows and things don’t really want to eat it,” she continued. “And it had this shift going from the vine that’s going to save to the South to the vine that ate the South.”
As with any invasive species, there’s a push to eradicate it, then a shift in narrative. What was once lauded becomes shunned. This was true for the kudzu vine, however, it recently has experienced another shift: People are starting to use it as an authenticator.
“Bakeries, print shops, boutiques — there are so
PHOTO COURTESY OF MIXED METAPHORS PRODUCTIONS
CECILIA MCNEILL AS ‘THE FLIPPER’ IN ‘KUDZU.’
PHOTO COURTESY OF MMP
SUNNEE GOODWIN AS ‘THE PERSON PACKING.’
many things that are called ‘kudzu,’ and the proprietors, the people, use that to guarantee its authenticity and its Southernness,” she said. “So for us, that’s the metaphor for the 113 people that move [to Charlotte] every day at the same time that eviction rates are up by 36%.”
The kudzu vine simultaneously belongs, due to its ubiquitousness in the South, and doesn’t belong, since it has become labeled an invasive species. Martin felt that this metaphor was an effective way to tell the story they wanted to tell while simultaneously asking the question of what it means to call Charlotte home.
The production aims to force people to wonder how much one can truly belong if they weren’t born somewhere, but ousted the residents who had been there all along.
A play that lives inside you
The topic of inflation, wage theft, and affordable housing has been discussed to death, to the point where it’s so normalized it’s become the punchline of a joke for some, but for many, it’s a harsh reality. In recent years, more than 50% of millennials became homeowners, according to an Apartment List report, but it took them much longer than previous generations to achieve that milestone.
Many people know this, but few talk about it. That’s why MMP is bringing front and center.
“People are talking about displacement,” Martin said. “I just saw 12 memes this morning about how millennials and Gen Z is never going to own a home. We know this, but there’s a difference between knowing this and knowing it in your gut, experiencing it. And we think that that’s the key.
“So we always want to be taking these Charlotte-based issues,” she continued. “We want to explore them. We want to pull a whole onion apart. We want to deconstruct
how we’re talking about these things because we talk about these things, language creates reality.”
By bringing the audience face-to-face with the reality of the situation, Martin expects attendees to have a more visceral experience as opposed to if they just read about it somewhere or attended an run-of-the-mill stage play.
She felt the act of moving through a space, as opposed to sitting down, would be more impactful. There is no reason to be constantly checking your phone when your actively engaged in a production like Kudzu.
Martin explained that she wants the play to live inside people.
“We don’t want to get the glaze. We’re not competing with Netflix. We’re not competing with staying at home on the couch and watching a movie. That’s a great night,”
she said. “We wanted to be an experience, and we think that that movement is a part of what makes it this other art form.”
In addition to spreading awareness on a surface-level, MMP will be doing it on a deeper level. Forty percent of the ticket sales from the production will go to QC Family tree to support the work that they’re doing in the community.
“It’s not the artist’s job to show up in a community with answers,” she said. “It’s the artist’s job to show up with questions and creativity and digging.”
MMP isn’t trying to answer the question or solve the problem; they simply want to highlight an existing issue and encourage others to begin to solve the problem and they want to do it in a poignant way.
Though all of this may seem intense, Martin wants to remind people that it doesn’t have to be all bad.
“There is always joy,” she said. “There is always humanity. And the more that we can lean into that and lean away from numbers that just make you go numb and a billion reports on the same issue from five different agencies, for us, the key to unlocking these conversations and to activating our community is its humanity. The art is always the way to do that. So it’s got to be joyful, too. And you’re definitely going to have some joyful moments inside of this piece.”
Kudzu: A Story of Belonging will run from Aug. 22 to Sept. 1 at QC Family Tree’s Big Blue House, 2916 Parkway Avenue in Charlotte. DLEWIS@QCNERVE.COM
PHOTO COURTESY OF MMP
BEHIND THE SCENES OF CREATING THE ‘KUDZU’ SET.
PHOTO COURTESY OF MMP PART OF THE ‘KUDZU’ SET.
PHOTO COURTESY OF MMP
‘KUDZU’ REHEARSALS.
PHOTO COURTESY OF MMP PART OF THE ‘KUDZU’ SET.
8/21
BOTANICAL MEDICINE MAKING FOR GUT HEALING
Ivy Integrative’s herbal workshop takes place at the point where conventional and alternative medicine meet. Dr. Chelsea Birch, a naturopathic doctor, will join licensed nutritionist Elena DiPerri to lead a discussion on gut health, the connection between the gut and the brain, diagnostic approaches to healing and holistic treatment options. Participate in a seminar and an interactive workshop in which you will create your own herbal infusion tincture for improved gut health made of herbs such as gentian, marshmallow, cramp bark, chamomile, fennel, ginger. Learn how gut health impacts anxiety, depression and hunger cues, as well as the common signs of gut imbalance such as gas, bloating, indigestion and food sensitivities.
More: $25; Aug. 21, 6:30-7:45 p.m.; Pranayama House Healing Center; 1511 Central Ave, Suite A; tinyurl.com/IVYIntegrative
UPCOMING EVENTS IN THE QUEEN CITY
wed sat
ONGOING Thur
8/22 - 9/1
‘MYSTERY OF IRMA VEP’
Inspired by classics like Wuthering Heights, Alfred Hitchcock’s Rebecca, and Universal’s horror movies of the 1930s and 4’40s (think Frankenstein, Dracula and The Mummy), Charles Ludlam’s farce is set in mystical Gothic England. Two actors play all the roles in this rollicking camp classic, in which vampire attacks, werewolf sightings and the resurrection of an Egyptian princess make for an exciting start to married life for Lady Enid. PaperHouse Theatre will hold seven performances of the play in the intimate screening room behind VisArt Video, making for an immersive performance unlike anything you’ll catch in Charlotte’s larger venues.
More: $28; Aug. 22-Sept. 1, times vary; VisArt Video, 3104 Eastway Video; paperhouseplus.com
SAPPHO SPHERE
8/22
From the folks who brought you monthly sapphic dance meet-up Ultraviolet, Sappho Sphere is a sapphic showcase featuring live performances from local musicians Saint Josie, Maggie Lowe and Wild Recluse. Saint Josie is a hyper-pop, electronic artist whose music is infused with raw human emotion. As a trans artist, Josie writes from a place of authenticity and seeks to be the representation she wished she had when she was growing up. Coming off a recent Charlotte Pride performance, Maggie Lowe is a singer-songwriter with stripped back production and folksy tunes. Wild Recluse is a captivating multi-disciplinary artist who fearlessly dives into the realms of love, pleasure, and perceived chaos, oftentimes mixing her work from other mediums into her musician performances.
New York psych-pop band Crumb catapults listeners into a soundscape full of hypnotic sounds, existing at the crossroads of psychedelia, pop, jazz and rock. The swirling sounds of guitar fill the atmosphere as the four-piece transports fans into another realm.
Touring for their newest album, ANAMA, Crumb’s most recent project is a culmination of their work together for the last decade mixing poetically abstract concepts with directly confessional ones.
L’Rain is the musical project of Brooklyn-based multi-instrumentalist, composer and performer Taja Cheek. Discovery Zone is the experimental pop project of musician and multimedia artist JJ Weihl, who says he’s inspired by corporate culture and the uncanny valley.
More: $47.50; Aug. 24; 8 p.m.; The Underground; 820 Hamilton St.; fillmorenc.com
Queen City Nerve spoke to Sweet Spine about their rise to viral fame in November 2023 as they found themselves in the grips of TikTok trends with their single “Darkness,” a melodic yet haunting, melancholic rock song echoing the sound of the ’90s greatest alt-punk hits. The South Carolina band will rip on The Milestone stage alongside The Clear Coats, a North Carolina punk/grunge band; Girl Brutal, a Charlotte-based digipunk/scream-rap duo; Litter Kitten, a three-piece band with a particular expertise in noise; and Jelly Diver, billed as a Y2K glitchbreak/breakcore/jungle artist.
More: $10-$15; Aug. 27; 8 p.m.; The Milestone; 3400 Tuckaseegee Road; themilestone.club
SAINT JOSIE WILL PERFORM AT SAPPHO SPHERE
Courtesy of Saint Josie 8/22
UPCOMING EVENTS IN THE QUEEN CITY
wed 8/28 thurs
BLACK CAROLINA ARTIST RESIDENCY RECEPTION
The Gantt Center invites neighbors to help celebrate its first Black Carolina Artist Residency cohort, featuring five Black artists from North and South Carolina who will showcase their newly created works made during a six-month residency at the museum in this small exhibition. The first cohort heavily leans Queen City, featuring four Charlotte artists: Dammit Wesley, de’Angelo DIA, Georgie Nakima and Monique Luck joined by fourthgeneration needle worker and quilt maker Torreah “Cookie” Washington out of Charleston. The reception is a great opportunity for the community to both connect with the Black Carolina Collective (BCC), an intentionally curated community of Black artists from the Carolinas whose members receive exclusive development opportunities.
More: Free; Aug. 28, 6-9 p.m.; Harvey B. Gantt Center, 551 S. Tryon St.; ganttcenter.org
8/29
JONATHAN SCALES FOURCHESTRA
It’s a non-description that has become a cliche at this point, but suffice to say that the whimsically named Jonathan Scales Fourchestra defies all labels. The power trio of electric bass (E’Lon JD), drums (Maison Guidry), and steel pans (Jonathan Scales) combines elements of jazz, classical and prog rock peppered with Latin rhythms and soulful outbursts of funk. Having toured the world as cultural ambassadors for the US Department of State and backed up Béla Fleck for his NPR Tiny Desk Concert, it’s been said that the Fourchestra is now finally truly embracing their identity as a group as it nears the release of its eighth studio album.
Spend Labor Day weekend in the town of Matthews’ Stumptown Park. The four-day celebration will include games, rides, food, a parade, arts, crafts and a petting zoo along with free entertainment. More than 160 regional artisans will gather in the Small Shops Pavilion to sell their unique items. Friday includes shag dancing to Carolina beach music, Saturday brings one of the largest Labor Day parades in the Southeast, Sunday features live music performances on the main stage, and Monday provides a chance to ride the rides you haven’t experienced yet and get in any last-minute shopping.
More: Free; Aug. 30-Sept. 2, times vary; Stumptown Park, 120 S. Trade St., Matthews; matthewsalive.org
8/31
SOUTHERN SOUL BOOTS & DUKES
Rapping doesn’t begin and end with hip-hop, and this hybrid collaborative event from Southern Soul Boots & Dukes is here to prove it. The Rooster’s Gypsy Outlaw Music Festival combines country rap, gospel rap, rock rap, hip-hop and more for a truly unforgettable night. The family-friendly event hosted by Luna Love will engage the audience with a mixture of music performances, comedy acts and DJs. The festival will feature guests including country artists Zay Grastley and Brennan Myers, gospel artists DTQ, Southern soul artist TC, country rapper Yuccie Banks, rap/rock Artist Alphabettik, comedian Rayahfoo, with guest DJs DJ-DTEC and MTB. Doors open at 5 p.m. and the show starts at 6 p.m.
More: $10-15; Aug. 31, 6 p.m.-11:30 p.m.; The Rooster, 334 W. Main Ave., Gastonia; theroostergastonia.com
KOKEDAMA WORKSHOP
9/1
Into botanicals but not necessarily interested in their healing properties? We still have a workshop for you. Discover the ancient Japanese art of kokedama as you select from a variety of lush plants and learn to create your own botanical masterpiece. With guidance from the knowledgeable PlantHouse Charlotte crew, attendees will plant and shape their soil ball, wrap it in moss and secure it with twine, resulting in a stunning and eco-friendly display piece. Alcoholic and non-alcoholic beverages will be available for purchase to fuel your creativity. Visit the plant shop early or stick around after to shop the retail plant shelves with a special discount.
More: $17.50-$25; Sept. 1, 1:30 p.m.; PlantHouse, 2452 Park Road, Unit D; tinyurl.com/KokedamaCLT
JONATHAN SCALES FOURCHESTRA Courtesy of JSF 8/29
JUMPING CONTINENTS
Anna Elise LaFrance finds success in theatre, launches music career in UK
BY JONATHAN GOLIAN
As the saying goes, “There is no place like home.” After all, home is the place where we feel the most comfortable, the area where we know every corner, and, in the quieter moments, we look to when needed.
Sometimes in order to truly grow, however, it is necessary to leave the comforts of the towns and cities we know best, and for Anna Elise LaFrance, it took traversing from the Queen City over the Atlantic to a new continent for her to learn just how far her creativity can go.
After graduating from Northwest School of the Arts in 2017, LaFrance made her way to London to study at the Rose Bruford College of Theatre & Performance, then The Royal Central School of Speech & Drama.
She has since seen success in UK theatre, and more recently branched out to start her music career, releasing her debut single “It’s All Happening” over the summer.
One of LaFrance’s biggest accomplishments in the UK was to produce and star in KJ Hinterland’s Pretend for London’s Etcetera Theatre in March 2024.
Following the lives of Sophie, Holly, Zoe, and finally Cat, Anna’s character role, Pretend revolves around the friend group’s experiences in the theatre scene of London’s West End.
As described by Etcetera, “The story revolves around the close-knit friendship between Sophie, Holly, Zoe, and Cat, aspiring actresses who have dreamed of making it big on stage since childhood. As they land coveted roles in a highly anticipated production, they are euphoric at the prospect of realizing their dreams together.
“However, their debut is fraught with challenges,” it continues. “Each woman must confront personal demons and grapple with betrayals and secrets threatening their unity. After a devastating truth is revealed, they come
together to help Sophie in a life-threatening battle against her body following an unintentionally injurious procedure.”
Poised as a queer drama and taking place amongst backstage dressing rooms, the play is a hyper-focused exploration of the complexities regarding female friendship and romance, the pursuit of success, and the harsh realities of living in the spotlight by night while facing everyday challenges when the curtains close.
Anna attributes a lot of her success in producing the play to what her hometown had done for her as an artist and creative, directly linking Charlotte’s ability to nurture its own through its venues and the opportunities they bring to those starting out.
“Charlotte will always hold a special place in my heart,” Anna shares, “and I will always return home to visit and encourage the artistic scene that helped me get to where I am today.”
From one stage to the next
This year has been a big one for LaFrance on more than one stage, as she recently showed off her multihyphenate side when she released her debut single, “It’s All Happening,” in July.
The single features LaFrance’s energetic vocals with vibrant keys sprinkled over drums and soothing eclectic guitar, a casual yet upbeat celebration of finding and enjoying new life experiences.
Anna invokes mountain landscapes, moonlit locales and city lights — “Courtside seats/ easy streets/ newfound beats/ Santa Barbara…) as a way to cast a bit of magic for listeners, drawing pictures for our imagination and adding in a bit of color with her cheerful vocal inflections.
The poppy feel of the song draws the listener in and gives an unseen inspiration to go find what’s worth seeking, all while LaFrance speaks from a first-person point of view.
“The inspiration behind this song originated from an incredible experience I had on Lookout Mountain in Laurel Canyon — a place steeped in rich musical history. As you may know, this magical area was once inhabited by iconic artists like Joni Mitchell, Jim Morrison of The Doors, Carole King, and Gram Parsons. Walking the same
paths and breathing the same creative air that fueled these legendary musicians greatly inspired me.”
Though she explicitly cites the West Coast as the inspiration for the song, one can’t help but link the warm track with LaFrance’s experiences overseas, including in theatre. Since leaving Charlotte, she has struck out for herself as a creative in an entirely different country, something that’s hard enough to do in your hometown — or continent.
“It’s All Happening” isn’t just the name of her first track, it is the experience that this multi-talented 25-year-old is going through in this moment, as the small worlds around her open up to her ambitions.
Given the extra dimensions of her own story so far, the song is a wonderfully hopeful message for anyone looking to include something more upbeat and inspirational to their playlists.
Flying the coop
LaFrance’s journey is her own, but it’s far from unique to the Charlotte scene, as locals have recently been successful in expanding beyond the borders of the Southeast and even the country.
Whether it’s Elijah Von Cramon’s Paint Fumes touring North America with Australian DIY punks The Chats and blazing their own headlining tours across Europe or, more recently, math-rock unit Cloutchaser’s Japan excursion in July, Charlotte artists are breaking out in full force, letting folks know the strength of the Queen City scene.
With the constant construction happening within our city each year, bulldozing cultural touchstones of the Queen City like Tremont, The Chop Shop, or even Crown Station’s old intimate location in Elizabeth, it can feel like the city’s culture crumbles a little each day.
While that is partly true, I take an alternate view to pair with it: Charlotte’s gone from being just an incubator of talent to becoming an exporter of it.
In the most punk way, our artists are taking over other locales with everything they learned and honed here, and with LaFrance’s story to reflect on as the most recent example, I lean on that as why Charlotte can be seen as a rising force in music and arts on the East Coast.
INFO@QCNERVE.COM
MODERN MOXIE - ‘TRIPPING THE LIGHT FANTASTIC’
Modern Moxie executes a fantastical and magicalrealism LP with hauntingly beautiful melodies by taking a moment to question how we create our own realities and how societal expectations influence our human experience.
Release date: Aug. 30
ALBUM
DYLAN GILBERT - ‘WHEN DID EVERYTHING CHANGE’
The final installment of a trilogy of albums that began with the theatrical electronica of I’LL BE THE LAKEBED in 2020, the final album is about looking back, featuring lyrics that deal with the experience of loss and grief as well as the monumental shifts that have taken place in the past few years.
Release date: Aug. 30
ALBUM
BIG BACKYARD - SELF-TITLED
This Charlotte-emo trio has fully returned with four previously released tracks alongside three new songs that have never even been performed live yet. The band describes the LP as representing their last four years of growth, as they are humbled by the community’s embrace of the band’s rebirth.
Release date: Aug. 31
PHOTO BY KIM HARDY
ANNA ELISE LAFRANCE
REWIND: CLT’S NEW MUSIC RELEASES
SINGLE
DOWNHAUL - “ROOTBOUND”
A mix between emo and indie rock, Downhaul delivers an emotionally compelling single with regretful lyrics and a catchy guitar lick. We seem to let time pass, waiting for the “perfect moment,” until we realize we lost something and that it wasn’t worth it.
Stream on Spotify
SINGLE
LYNSEA - “HORMONES”
A newcomer to the Charlotte music scene, Lynsea delivers refreshing pop with fusions of country and ‘90s rock. The single explores how our bodies react to the circumstances around us, particularly when we find ourselves falling for someone.
Stream on Spotify
SINGLE
LEAVING FOR ARIZONA -
“SCARY
DOOR DOLLAR STORE”
A certified head-banger, Leaving for Arizona provides the perfect dance break — or a pit opening you can dive headfirst into. A proper feel-good song, the single offers a perfect opportunity to satiate your need for early-2000s post-punk music.
Stream on Spotify
SINGLE
TAI - “WHAT’S THE POINT?”
With unmatched star power as a female punk artist, Tai Popple is a live act to be reckoned with. Her stage presence permeates through her recorded tracks like “What’s The Point?” with compelling and complex melodies that carry that song through feelings of frustration and pure human emotion.
Stream on Spotify
EP FAYE - ‘APATHY’
Comprising members of beloved local favs Alright, Quad and Secret Hospital, Faye returns with their two-song EP, Apathy. Their twist on fuzzed-out indie presents itself with a moodiness complimented by softened noisiness that creates a cloudy haze all around you. “Furrows” is a standout track that pairs well with “Apathy,” and shines through its use of dynamics and grungy guitar.
Stream on Spotify
SINGLE
LADY DIE -
“FEEL DIFFERENTLY”
It’s not an understatement to say that your life will actually feel different once you take a listen to this heartwrenchingly beautiful song. A slow burn of sorts, the plucking of guitar is like a second hand of a watch ticking to every beat — waiting for all the pressure building up to boil over into a cry that rings for many moments after the song ends.
Stream on Spotify
SINGLE
WEEKEND FRIEND - “HURTS SO GOOD”
With a hint of angsty vocals and sounds reminiscent of beach rock, Weekend Friend creates music that hurts so good you can’t help but bang your head and rock out to. The single pulls at your heart strings with their catchy chorus with the sentiments of waiting for the moment you can finally move on.
Stream on Spotify
BY RYAN PITKIN
Taking place over two days at Blackbox Theater, PULSE Xperience will feature more than 50 BIPOC artists, designers, and small business entrepreneurs from Charlotte and around the Carolinas with the goal of bridging divides in local creative scenes while fostering unity and sparking essential conversations.
“We created PULSE to unite and celebrate the incredible creatives in Charlotte and the Carolinas,” said organizer Khalif Guiden, also known as rapper-producer Royal City LiF. “My team and I recognize the power of collaboration to elevate each other and our communities. The goal is to provide a space where emerging and
established artists, brands, and creatives can connect and be celebrated. Through PULSE, we aim to create an immersive, annual event that builds interest, anticipation and excitement for the future of art, music and culture in Charlotte and surrounding areas.
Charlotte-based rapper Deniro Farrar will headline the first night, as Walterboro, South Carolina native Nick Grant bookends the festival on Sunday. Other Charlotte performers include ReeCee Raps and soul singer De’Semaj. Also check for short film screenings, an LC Immersive Fashion Xperience, a Kulture Klash dance segment, and at least one freestyle cypher.
Natalie Carr at Petra’s 8/9/24
Photo by Dan Russell-Pinson
Coheed & Cambria at Skyla Amphitheatre, 8/17/24
Photo by Jeff Hahne
Layzi at Petra’s 8/9/24
Photo by Dan Russell-Pinson
DENIRO FARRAR WILL HEADLINE DAY ONE OF PULSE XPERIENCE.
PROMOTIONAL PHOTO
WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 21
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Dollar Signs w/ Those Dogs, Peach Rings, Saint Logic (The Milestone)
30 Years Of Grace: A Jeff Buckley Tribute (Petra’s)
Radio Source (Smokey Joe’s Cafe & Bar)
The Soundwave is Queen City Nerve’s comprehensive guide to live music happening in Charlotte every night of the week. This list is pulled together by our editorial team every other week from combing through Charlotte music venue calendars and separated by genre. None of these listings are paid advertisements. We understand that many non-traditional music venues offer live music like coffee shops, breweries, art galleries, community events and more.
This list may not have every event listed. To have a venue included in the editorial compilation of this list, please send an email to info@qcnerve.com with the subject “Soundwave.”
SINGER-SONGWRITER/ACOUSTIC
Pluto Duo (Goldie’s)
COVER BANDS
Noel Freidline, Maria Howell & Joe Gransden Honor Tony Bennett (Middle C Jazz)
MONDAY, AUGUST 26
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Green Day (PNC Music Pavilion)
Bush (Skyla Amphitheatre)
JAZZ/BLUES
The Bill Hanna Legacy Jazz Session (Petra’s) FUNK/JAM BANDS
PAKT (The Milestone)
COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA
Charlotte Bluegrass Allstars (Smokey Joe’s Cafe & Bar)
OPEN MIC
Find Your Muse Open Mic (Evening Muse)
TUESDAY, AUGUST 27
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Sweet Spine w/ The Clear Coats, Girl Brutal, Litter Kitten, Jelly Diver (The Milestone)
Crown the Empire (The Underground)
The March Violets w/ Rosegarden Funeral Party (Snug Harbor)
POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
Kikuo (Neighborhood Theatre)
CLASSICAL/INTRUMENTAL
Burnt Reeds (Birdsong Brewing)
OPEN MIC
Open Mic Night feat. The Smokin J’s (Smokey Joe’s Cafe & Bar)
WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 28
SINGER-SONGWRITER/ACOUSTIC
Russell ‘n’ Woods (Goldie’s)
Yosemite in Black w/ Cleansing of the Temple, Ultimatum, Mass Critique (The Milestone)
Jam Garden w/ Sky & Bobby (Goldie’s) Runaway Gin (Phish tribute) (Visulite Theatre)
SUNDAY, AUGUST 25
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Mike Strauss Band (Free Range Brewing)
Conebuds w/ Earth That Was (The Milestone)
Scotty Austin (The Rooster)
POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
Soul Sundays feat. Guy Nowchild (Starlight on 22nd)
Sha La La Sunday feat. DJ Fat Keith Richards (Petra’s) JAZZ/BLUES
Omari & the Hellhounds (Comet Grill)
HIP-HOP/SOUL/R&B
Snow Tha Product (The Fillmore)
Wilde Green w/ The Olde Guard, Tiny City, DJ Fat Keith Richards (Snug Harbor) COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA
William Matheny w/ Darrin Bradbury (Evening Muse)
JAZZ/BLUES
Jazz Nights @ Canteen (Camp North End)
The Chris O’Leary Band (Middle C Jazz)
POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
Beats @ Birdsong (Birdsong Brewing)
Imagine Dragons (PNC Music Pavilion) OPEN MIC
Singer/Songwriter Open Mic (The Rooster) Variety Open Mic Show (Starligt on 22nd)
THURSDAY, AUGUST 29
JAZZ/BLUES
Marcus Adams (Middle C Jazz)
Jonathan Scales Fourchestra (Petra’s)
Dizasterpiece w/ Alpha Strain, Absent Colors, Two Stroke Smoke (The Rooster)
CREATIVE COMMONS
MIKE DIRNT (LEFT) AND TRE COOL OF GREEN DAY WILL BE AT PNC ON AUG. 26.
The Soundwave is Queen City Nerve’s comprehensive guide to live music happening in Charlotte every night of the week. This list is pulled together by our editorial team every other week from combing through Charlotte music venue calendars and separated by genre. None of these listings are paid advertisements. We understand that many non-traditional music venues offer live music like coffee shops, breweries, art galleries, community events and more.
This list may not have every event listed. To have a venue included in the editorial compilation of this list, please send an email to info@qcnerve.com with the subject “Soundwave.”
HIP-HOP/SOUL/R&B
EXPERIMENTAL/MIXED-GENRE/FESTIVAL
Ken Carson (The Fillmore)
Gauxstman w/ Fatman Key (Snug Harbor)
Pulse Music Festival (Blackbox Theater)
Charlotte, Music City: An Art Show (Petra’s)
SINGER-SONGWRITER/ACOUSTIC
Karla Davis (Evening Muse)
Southern Soul Boots & Dukes (The Rooster) FUNK/JAM BANDS
Den of Wolves w/ Hellfire 76, Raviner, The White Horse, Manic Society (The Rooster) JAZZ/BLUES
Jonathan Butler (Middle C Jazz)
SINGER-SONGWRITER/ACOUSTIC
Lisa De Novo w/ The Abbey Elmore Band (Camp North End)
POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
Shadow Play (Crown Station)
Gimme Gimme Disco (The Underground)
Queer Coded Club Noir presents: CHUPA (Snug Harbor)
COVER BANDS
Bullet the Blue Sky (U2 tribute) (Amos’ Southend)
Gump Fiction w/ Rod Fiske (Goldie’s)
Abbey Road Live! (Visulite Theatre)
SATURDAY, AUGUST 31
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Mucho Gumbo (Comet Grill) SINGER-SONGWRITER/ACOUSTIC
Elonzo Wesley Band (Primal Brewery)
SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 1
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Subvertigo w/ Lockstep, Bluegill, Scrlett, Troubleshoot (The Milestone)
Avril Lavigne (PNC Music Pavilion)
HIP-HOP/SOUL/R&B
JT (Neighborhood Theatre)
JAZZ/BLUES
Omari & the Hellhounds (Comet Grill)
Jesus Molina (Middle C Jazz) POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
Hazy Sunday (Petra’s)
Soul Sundays feat. Guy Nowchild (Starlight on 22nd) FUNK/JAM BANDS
Celestial Company (Free Range Brewing) EXPERIMENTAL/MIXED-GENRE/FESTIVAL
Pulse Music Festival (Blackbox Theater) COVER BANDS
Big Fun w/ Shorty & Leisure (Goldie’s)
MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 2
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Once Below Joy w/ Nospun, Venus Invictus, Falllift (The Milestone)
Falling In Reverse (Skyla Amphitheatre)
JAZZ/BLUES
The Bill Hanna Legacy Jazz Session (Petra’s)
TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 3
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Angie Aparo (Evening Muse)
Chris Taylor & the Rumor w/ Bald Brothers (Goldie’s)
Red Rocking Chair (Comet Grill) OPEN MIC
Modern Moxie w/ Willa Mae, BrizB (Snug Harbor) JAZZ/BLUES
Jonathan Butler (Middle C Jazz)
Tosco Music Open Mic (Evening Muse)
POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
K-Pop Bash w/ DJ Rusty (Amos’ Southend)
Open Mic Night feat. The Smokin J’s (Smokey Joe’s Cafe & Bar)
Beatfreaq (Starlight on 22nd)
VISIT QCNERVE.COM FOR THE FULL SOUNDWAVE LISTING
Sidequest 1-Year Ann’y feat. DJ RPG, DJ NPC, FZXXX, DJ B3DH3AD, Bri (The Milestone)
COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA
American Aquarium w/ The Watson Twins (Neighborhood Theatre)
A MINT HILL OASIS
Panzú Brewery nears one year in business despite early struggles
BY ANNIE KEOUGH
Opening the Caribbean-inspired Panzú Brewery was anything but a smooth, refreshing process for siblings Johan Marte and Rosa Marte de Pacheco. Every step from the start of the business’s conception was hard-fought, but the co-owners owners were determined to honor their father through a family-run business, as they had always dreamed to do.
Through construction setbacks, fights with the bank, pandemics, fires and an overrun market, the pair have proved true to their intention to stick things out at their location in Mint Hill, where in September they’ll observe their one-year anniversary.
A rough start
The name Panzú came from the nickname that Johan and Rose — and their own children after them — called their father: “Papá Panzú,” which translates to “big beer belly guy.” The brewery’s logo, a bearded man wearing glasses and a hat while holding a full pint of beer (no beer belly in sight), was modeled in honor of him.
“Without him, we wouldn’t be here,” Johan said. “Everything that we had and are is because of him. We have the same values from him, we wanted to honor him.”
Papá Panzú was an entrepreneur himself, owning a fruit pulp production company for 37 years in the Dominican Republic, of which the siblings were shareholders.
Johan moved to the U.S. in 2000, living and working in Boston, New York and New Jersey before settling in Mint Hill in 2008. Rosa followed five years later.
Having worked together within their father’s company, Rosa and Johan decided to continue their partnership in Mint Hill. After their dad passed in 2016, the siblings wanted to memorialize him with their upcoming business.
With Papá Panzú’s love for beer, Rosa’s knack for the restaurant business and Johan already brewing 5-gallon buckets of beer in his backyard, a brewery just made sense.
After looking through several locations, Johan came across one small plot in the heart of Mint Hill, which was originally meant for his other business. When he called Rosa to check it out, they both immediately saw the
vision for their future brewery.
They started on a business plan almost immediately and then got to work building the place from the ground up, with Johan’s construction company taking over the job after an issue with another contractor and their bank set them back eight months.
After four years — two years planning and two years building, all in the middle of a pandemic — Panzú Brewery celebrated its grand opening on Sept. 15, 2023.
That accomplishment was quickly sidetracked by a small fire in the kitchen that closed the brewery down for ten days a month later.
In an attempt to maximize the space in the kitchen, a stove was pushed close to a metal plate on the wall that heated up after a five-hour empanada preparation. Though there were no actual flames, the pair came too close to losing their establishment.
“I was here that day,” Johan recalled. “I’m looking at the smoke and I say ‘I can’t believe that after all this freaking time that we actually put hard work on it, it’s gonna go in flames.’”
Although the brewery is safe from incineration, now that six Charlotte breweries have closed within the past six months, there’s still more that goes into not letting themselves get burned on their investment and passion.
Viva Latino
In April’s Beer Issue, Queen City Nerve talked with local craft beer writer Matt McKenzie about the state of the Charlotte brewery.
Drawing on his 15 years of local expertise, McKenzie believes the businesses that will stay around are neighborhood breweries that embed themselves into a community for the sole purpose of providing locals a place to enjoy beer.
A definition could no better fit a business than McKenzie’s one fits Panzú.
“We are very connected with the community,” Rosa
said. “Mint Hill is part of us and we are part of Mint Hill. I don’t think it’s just another brewery, [Panzú] is like Mint Hill’s clubhouse.”
The duo picked the location in Mint Hill to set themselves apart from the competition Uptown and in the neighborhoods surrounding the city’s center. From the beginning, they wanted to be a town brewery. A place where people can come and enjoy their beer in a safe place that is unlike the others.
As the only brewery in town and one that prides itself on brewing a Caribbean-style beer that anyone can drink, they are well on their way to achieve that goal.
THE PANZÚ PATIO BEFORE OPENING.
PHOTO COURTESY OF PANZÚ BREWERY
PANZÚ BREWERY PHOTO COURTESY OF PANZÚ BREWERY
THE EMPANADAS ARE A FAVORITE AT PANZÚ.
PHOTO COURTESY OF PANZÚ BREWERY
The aesthetic of the location provides an oasis, a beach getaway smack in the middle of a bustling downtown area.
Johan said it’s his mission to expand the palettes of his clientele. He works with Panzú’s brewmaster to convince even the most devout pilsner-drinker to enjoy an IPA, or vice versa.
Johan’s own wife is a testament to this. The IPA skeptic’s favorite beer at the brewery is Panzú’s most popular drink, the Pint of Sunshine Hazy IPA.
Many Latino breweries chose to contract their beer instead of brewing their own, Johan explained. He
believes Panzú is the only Latino brewery in Charlotte that brews its own beer, if not the only one in town.
Rosa also pointed out that Panzú is not just a brewery but a restaurant, which gives them an advantage. Because of the extra requirements and expenses, most breweries opt to serve food through food trucks rather than an in-restaurant kitchen.
“We do have our own kitchen because we wanted to have something different,” Rosa said. “And we didn’t think we were going to get the Caribbean flare and flavors that we wanted with just getting regular food trucks.”
According to Johan, there are only three breweries
run by Dominicans in the entire country. Despite this, the siblings didn’t want to make their brewery solely Dominican, choosing instead to categorize the business as “Caribbean.”
“We wanted to be an inclusive brewery,” Johan said. “It was designed that way because we wanted to enhance our Latino and Caribbean heritage.”
The number of BIPOC-owned breweries in Charlotte is sparse, and the siblings wanted to provide people with a welcoming environment to learn about their culture. The kitchen serves food with Venezuelan, Puerto Rican, Dominican Republic and Haitian-inspired flavors.
“There’s no place in Charlotte that you can get the food that we have here,” he added.
Rosa also lends credit to the Mint Hill and Charlotte craft beer communities for their support. Although they are a new business, the older, more established establishments have taken them in during their tribulations.
“We have been blessed with a community like us,” said Rosa. “We have never felt that we are any different than any other brewery or craft brewery that we have worked with … We are proud of what we have accomplished here. We hope to be able to replicate Panzú on other towns.”
THE PANZÚ PATIO GETS HOPPING OFTEN.
PHOTO COURTESY OF PANZÚ BREWERY
PANZÚ HAS GREAT FOOD OFFERINGS & GAMES.
PHOTOS COURTESY OF PANZÚ BREWERY
THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 28
LOCATION TBD 2-5 P.M.
An event for LGBTQ+ Charlotte residents or anyone without a place to celebrate!
LEARN MORE
LIFESTYLE PUZZLES
SUDOKU
BY LINDA THISTLE
TRIVIA TEST
BY FIFI RODRIGUEZ
1. GEOGRAPHY: Where is the Parthenon located?
2. TELEVISION: What game are the younger characters in “Stranger Things” playing at the start of the series?
3. MOVIES: Who was the first African American actor to win the Academy Award for Best Actor?
4. LITERATURE: What is floo powder used for in the “Harry Potter” book series?
5. U.S. CITIES: Which U.S. city’s nickname is Beantown?
6. AD SLOGANS: Which rideshare company’s slogan is “Move the way you want”?
7. ART: Which artist painted a work titled “The Potato Eaters”?
8. MUSIC: Who wrote the song “God Bless America”?
CROSSWORD
PLACE A NUMBER IN THE EMPTY BOXES IN SUCH A WAY THAT EACH ROW ACROSS, EACH COLUMN DOWN AND EACH SMALL 9-BOX SQUARE CONTAINS ALL OF THE NUMBERS ONE TO NINE.
9. HISTORY: Who became U.S. president after Abraham Lincoln was assassinated?
10. ANIMAL KINGDOM: Which animal can hold its breath for up to five minutes underwater?
A tiger swallowtail glides above my backyard creek, held up by yellow wings with coal-black tiger stripes. It heads toward a clethra bush festooned with spikes of nectar-filled pink flowers. It settles and sips. I never tire of watching.
Late summer is butterfly season here in the North Carolina Piedmont. Since butterflies love sun and heat, late August and September are ideal times to watch for them. Tiger and Black Swallowtails, lemon yellow cloudless sulphurs, bright orange Gulf fritillaries, dozens of tiny skippers and many, many others spend their days nectaring, mating and laying eggs. Monarchs will soon pass through, traveling to their hibernation grounds in Mexico.
Creating butterfly gardens has been one of the great pleasures of my life. Fifteen years ago, when my son attended Shamrock Gardens Elementary, I worked with other parents to fill the school’s courtyards with butterfly plants. We looked after nectar plants whose flowers fed adult butterflies, and host plants whose leaves fed caterpillars. A dazzling array of butterflies showed up. A few years later, every Shamrock classroom had a caterpillar-raising cage, filled with caterpillars we found in our own gardens. The students were enchanted. We lost those gardens when our beautiful building was demolished to make way for a new one. But I still grow many of the same plants in my yard, and the butterflies have found them. If you plant it, they will come. With a sunny patch of ground, or even just a couple of pots, you can create your own butterfly haven. Free yourself from those sterile, high-maintenance, chemicallaced lawns! Butterfly gardens are more beautiful, better for the planet and easier to maintain.
A couple of new books can help you get started. Butterfly Gardening in the Carolina Piedmont, written by yours truly and beautifully designed by Little Shiva, describes some common area butterflies and offers suggestions about planting for them. It’s currently available from Amazon and Park Road Books, and can be read for free on the Nerve’s Issuu site. It should be in other local shops soon, with a Spanish translation also in the works.
If you’d like to dive more deeply. UNC Press has just published a terrific new field guide, Butterflies of North Carolina, South Carolina, Virginia, and Georgia. Put together by the region’s most enthusiastic and knowledgeable butterfly enthusiasts, it has pictures of most of the 202 species sighted in these four states — swallowtails and fritillaries; sulphurs and skippers; buckeyes, painted ladies, hairstreaks and so many more.
It also includes detailed descriptions of each species, overviews of the region’s butterfly habitats, maps that show where each species can be found, and the months in which each species is likely to appear. If you want to go out butterflying, this is the book for you.
There are plenty of good butterflying sites in Mecklenburg County. Latta Prairie at the Latta Nature Preserve and McDowell Prairie at the McDowell Nature Center and Preserve are great places to start. The Carolina Butterfly Society, including its Greater Charlotte chapter, sponsors field trips and other events. Also look for moths. While butterflies get most of the attention, moths are far more abundant. Some, such as the ethereal green lunas, are larger than butterflies, and just as gorgeous. Many moths are small and brown, but a close look at their wings reveals remarkable patterns.
In summer, organizations that include the North Carolina Wildlife Federation and the Nature Resources Division of Mecklenburg Park and Recreation holds Moth Nights, with lights and bait that draw dozens of different moths. There’s a Moth Night coming up on on Aug. 22 at Reedy Creek Nature Preserve. There is so much out there in the dark.
Planting for and watching butterflies draws you closer to the natural world that surrounds us. You’ll come across many other fascinating creatures. I love to watch big, furry native bees, who live alone and make nests underground.
If you see neat circles cut into the edges of leaves, that’s a leafcutter bee gathering material for a nest. They’ll hang out in flowers all night long, then get up late. If you get out in the garden early you’re likely to find flowers full of sleepy bees. They’ll only sting if you grab or squish them.
You’ll also learn more about the workings of our planet. Animals, insects and plants have developed close, complex relationships. Most caterpillars eat only one or two kinds of leaves — basically because their ancestors won the evolutionary battle for that particular plant. Monarch caterpillars, who only eat milkweed, are a prime example, but plants also nourish other creatures.
In addition to feeding monarch caterpillars, milkweed beds host a varied interdependent community — aphids suck sap, ladybugs eat aphids, milkweed bugs eat milkweed seeds, assassin bugs eat milkweed bugs. As they eat and grow, caterpillars transform the leaves they eat into food for birds and other creatures.
The plight of monarchs and honeybees have been well publicized, but many other species need help as well. The same pesticides and rampant development that have sharply reduced the monarch’s milkweed supply have also affected hundreds of native plants that nurture a wide range of other caterpillars. North Carolinians don’t see nearly as many butterflies as we used to — I’ve noticed the difference in the fifteen years I’ve been looking.
If you want to start a butterfly garden, look first for native perennial wildflowers. Plant them in groups to create masses of bloom. To feed the greatest number of butterflies, you should have flowers blooming from early spring through late fall.
Prepare your garden in full or partial sun — butterflies love sun! Include flowers of different colors, shapes, heights and bloom seasons. A variety of plant species will attract a variety of butterfly species. Fill in with annuals that have long bloom times.
Natives work especially well because they’re adapted to the area and because they also nurture other creatures, but plants from other places can play starring roles in your garden as well. Zinnias, marigolds and lantanas are all native to Mexico, but they bloom all summer, feeding butterflies with their flowers and birds with their seeds.
You should also plant host plants for caterpillars: spicebush, parsley, senna, paw paw, passion vine, coral honeysuckle, on and on. Since most caterpillars eat only a specific kind of leaf, a female butterfly must find the right plant to lay her eggs.
If you see a butterfly flitting from one leaf to another,
it’s probably a female looking for a host plant. Many butterflies have scent glands in their feet; they judge a leaf’s suitability by giving it a gentle tap.
You can start with just one or two host plants — parsley, the host for eastern black swallowtails, is the easiest. But the more host plants you grow, the more caterpillars you’ll discover. I’m always looking to add new host plants and raise new cats.
I’ve shaped my gardens through trial and error, trying out all sorts of different plants to see how they’ll fare. I’ve also had help from local butterfly enthusiasts.
Braedon Shelton and Bailey Griswold run Bring Back the Butterflies, a backyard nursery where they focus on butterfly-friendly plants. They periodically have a stall at the Saturday Uptown Market and I’ve added lots of things from them to my garden, including coneflowers, a hard-to-find Dutchman’s pipevine and most recently a Chickasaw plum tree.
Will Stephens has a small gardening business, Grow Better: Gardening and Eco Landscaping, that focuses on native and butterfly-friendly plants. He’s recently helped me spruce up and improve my garden. He’s also the son of my dear friend Beth Henry, whose enthusiastic love for butterflies and other creatures has inspired me since I first started down this path. I still grow many of the plants she shared with me, and the butterflies still love them.
There are plenty of other resources on the web. Back in 2013, Angel Hjarding shaped a Butterfly Highway program for North Carolina. It was subsequently taken over by The North Carolina Wildlife Federation, which sponsors a useful website.
Located in New Hampshire, The Caterpillar Lab has amazing pictures of caterpillars and sells beautiful educational materials. The companion website to my book, ncswallowtail.org, also has more information as well as educational materials.
It’s not quite time to start planting; it’s better to wait until the heat subsides. But it’s a swell time to start planning. Be sure to look out for the fall plant sales held by Wing Haven and the UNC Charlotte Botanical Gardens — they sell all sorts of native plants.
Happy butterflying!
INFO@QCNERVE.COM
HOROSCOPE
AUG. 21 - AUG. 27 AUG. 28 - SEpt. 3
ARIES (March 21 to April 19) A previous misunderstanding continues to taint the atmosphere to some extent during the early part of the week. But cooler heads prevail, and the situation eases by the week’s end.
TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) While the artistic aspect of the Divine Bovine is well-served this week, your practical side is also getting the sort of recognition that could lead to a new and well-deserved opportunity.
GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) With home-related matters taking on more importance this week, now could be the time to make some long-deferred purchases. But shop carefully for the best quality at the best price.
CANCER (June 21 to July 22) Congratulations! While a family problem might still rankle, it should be easing, thanks to your efforts to calm the waters. Also, a workplace situation seems to be moving in your favor.
LEO (July 23 to August 22) The Big Cat’s energy levels should be rather high these days, and you might do well to tackle any tasks that still need doing. This will clear the way for any upcoming projects.
VIRGO (August 23 to September 22) Someone’s criticism might not be as negative as you perceive. Actually, it could be helpful. Discuss the matter with your critic, and you both could learn something valuable.
LIBRA (September 23 to October 22) A business matter could cause some friction among your colleagues. But once again, that logical mind of yours comes to the rescue. And the sooner it does, the better!
SCORPIO (October 23 to November 21) There still might be some heated temper flare-ups out there. But your sensible self should advise you to stay out of these situations until things cool down and calm is restored.
SAGITTARIUS (November 22 to December 21) Changing your mind could be the right thing to do if you can’t resolve your doubts. You might want to discuss the matter with someone whose advice you trust.
CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 19) The Sea Goat’s merrier side dominates this week, and this means that despite your usual busy schedule, you’ll be able to squeeze in parties and all sorts of fabulously fun times.
AQUARIUS (January 20 to February 18) An educational opportunity could offer a lead to something other than what you had planned. But keep an open mind, and before you decide to turn it down, check it out.
PISCES (February 19 to March 20) The Piscean wit and wisdom you have helps you work through a situation that might have been accidentally, or even deliberately, obscured. What you unravel could prove to be very revealing.
BORN THIS WEEK: Loyalty is important to you. You demand it, but you also give it generously and lovingly.
ARIES (March 21 to April 19) Impatience with those who don’t keep up with you can cause resistance, which, in turn, can lead to more delays. It’s best to be helpful and supportive if you want good results.
TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) A surprise announcement from a colleague could put you on the defense. Gather your facts and respond. You’ll soon find the situation shifting in your favor.
GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) The time spent away from a project pays off with a new awareness of options that you hadn’t considered before. Weigh them carefully before deciding which to choose.
CANCER (June 21 to July 22) Consider confronting a personal conflict while there’s still time to work things out. A delay can cause more problems. A longtime colleague might offer to mediate.
LEO (July 23 to August 22) Some emerging matters could impede the Lion’s progress in completing an important project. Best advice: Deal with them now before they can create costly delays.
VIRGO (August 23 to September 22) Your aspect continues to favor an expanding vista. This could be a good time to make a career move, and taking an out-oftown job could be a good way to do it.
LIBRA (September 23 to October 22) Disruptive family disputes need to be settled so that everyone can move on. Avoid assuming this burden alone, though. Ask — no, demand help with this problem.
SCORPIO (October 23 to November 21) Patience is called for as you await word on an important workplace situation. A personal circumstance, however, could benefit by your taking immediate action.
SAGITTARIUS (November 22 to December 21) Don’t lose confidence in yourself. Those doubters are likely to back off if you demand that they show solid proof as to why they think your ideas won’t work.
CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 19) A temporary setback might cause some unsettling moments for the usually sure-footed Goat. But keep going! The path ahead gets easier as you move forward.
AQUARIUS (January 20 to February 18) There’s welcome news from the workplace. There could also be good news involving a relationship that has long held a special meaning for you.
PISCES (February 19 to March 20) You still might need to cut some lingering ties to a situation that no longer has the appeal it once held. In the meantime, you can start to explore other opportunities.
BORN THIS WEEK: Your sense of what’s right can inspire others if you remember not to push too hard to make your case. Moderation works best for you.
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DECEMBER 25 | PRINT BREAK
SAVAGE LOVE WHAT’S EATING YOU?
No butts about it
BY DAN SAVAGE
I’m a queer cis woman in my late 30s with a problem: I don’t like having my pussy eaten. This isn’t about me being uncomfortable with the way my pussy looks or smells or tastes. I just don’t like the sensation. At best, I get close but eventually plateau, which is frustrating. At worst, it feels slimy, like a slug exploring my genitals. Also, being on my back with my knees up reminds me of being at the gynecologist, which is not sexy. In the end, it’s just not my thing. But the actual problem for me is modern men. They are obsessed with eating pussy and get very pouty when you don’t think it’s the best. I like plenty of other things — being held and talked dirty to, light teasing with their mouths, fingering, etc. — but they all want to get me off orally. I get a lot of, “You just haven’t had it done right,” or, “Wait until I do it for you,” and then they get mad when (surprise!) I don’t like this thing I don’t like. I tried dating a couple of men who “don’t eat pussy,” but those men didn’t seem to care at all about getting a woman off. And while I’m queer, it feels like cunnilingus is even more important when you’re hooking up with other women/AFABs. Honestly, I feel like faking it with new partners and enjoying my actual orgasms alone would be easier than opening about this to new people. Being treated like a freak has turned sex, which is supposed to be fun, into something that makes me feel bad about myself.
Any advice would be appreciated. At the very least, Dan, maybe you could make a public service announcement telling people that being GGG for a cis woman doesn’t just mean eating her pussy, it means showing a genuine interest in who she is as an individual sexual being.
WISH I LIKED LICKS
Let’s get that PSA out of the way: Not everyone likes receiving oral! There are cis men who don’t like having their cocks sucked! There are cis women who don’t like having their pussies eaten! There are trans men who don’t like having their pussies eaten or their neophalluses sucked and trans women who don’t like having their cocks sucked or their neovaginas eaten and enbies who don’t like having their genitals — whatever form they take — licked or sucked! People are allowed to dislike things! Even things you’re good at! Even things most people like! Being GGG means listening to people when they tell you what they
like! And doing those things! If they’re things you like too! It’s really not hard!
I hope that helps, WILL, but since PSAs never reach 100% of their target demo, you’ll still have to tell new partners you dislike receiving oral sex. That means, if you don’t wanna spend the rest of your life faking orgasms before sneaking away to get yourself off (which sounds worse than having to explain that receiving oral isn’t what you want), you’re gonna have to use your words.
Pro-tip: Don’t string weak-ass words together into mealy-mouthed statements like, “Sometimes I get close from oral but I’ve never gotten off from oral and there are other things we could do if that’s okay?” The kind of guys you wanna fuck — who are, ironically enough, the kind of guys who do wanna eat pussy — are highly likely to interpret a statement like that as a cry for help. Many of them may have been with women in the past who were uncomfortable with their own genitals and/or had never been with a guy who loved eating pussy, WILL, and thanks to their persistence — in offering oral over and over again — dozens or hundreds of other women overcame their hangups and discovered that they loved being on the receiving end of oral sex. That is how it sometimes goes down.
But that’s not how it’s gonna go down for you.
You don’t have issues with how your pussy looks, smells, or tastes and you’ve been with plenty of men who loved eating pussy. You’ve give it a try — again and again and again — and it’s not for you. So, when you’re with a new sex partner, WILL, you need to hammer that point home with a clear and emphatic statement like this: “You’re one of the good guys — I hate straight guys who don’t go down on women — but plenty of people who were really good at eating pussy have gone down on me and it does nothing for me. Not only doesn’t it turn me on, it turns me the fuck off. And that’s not what either of us is here for. So, about those fingers of yours…”
Zooming out for a second, WILL, you say you’re frustrated by modern men who seem to believe eating pussy is synonymous with meeting a woman’s needs — and you’re proof that isn’t true for all women — but you’ve found that retrograde men who loudly refuse to eat pussy are worse, as those men don’t care about getting a woman off.
I have some good news for you, WILL: Your choices aren’t limited to guys who won’t shut up about how much they love eating pussy and guys who won’t shut up about how much they hate it. Because mixed into the pile of
modern men who seem obsessed with eating pussy, WILL, you will find a small number of modern men who are only pretending to be obsessed. And in that pile of queer women (and AFABs) you might wanna fuck or date, WILL, you will find a small number of women (and AFABs) who enjoy everything about sapphic sex except the eating pussy part.
The kind of partner you want is someone who goes through the motions of pushing back when you say you don’t want to receive oral sex (“Wait until I do it for you!”) but who doesn’t push back for long. In other words, WILL, you want someone who’s relieved to learn they don’t have to eat your pussy but whose relief isn’t obvious. If you can own that — if you can admit to wanting a partner who either wants to eat your pussy but doesn’t insist on it or someone does a very good impression of someone wants to eat your pussy — you’ll have an easier time tolerating the pushback you’re inevitably going to receive when you share this fact about yourself.
Because that pushback is good sign, WILL — a sign that this person is worth the time and effort required to convince them that, no, you really and truly don’t want to receive oral sex.
My partner and I have been dating for almost a year, and everything’s been amazing — this is the best relationship I’ve had in a long time. We have a Dom/sub dynamic, and he really wants me to get into anal play, something I’m new to. Early in our relationship, we tried, but I was on a medication that made me nauseous, so it was unpleasant, but I’m no longer on that medication. He hasn’t pushed the subject since, until the other day when he tried to insert a plug without much warning. I told him I need more comfort and preparation before we dive into that kind of play, especially since I’m a novice at anal. I also confessed I’ve been dealing with some GI issues. He made it clear that he eventually wants
exploration with plugs). And while he hasn’t been forceful, he mentioned that not progressing with anal could be a dealbreaker for him. Is that fair? Can anal really be a dealbreaker? How do I navigate this without compromising my comfort while still being a good partner?
ADVICE NEGOTIATING ANAL LEEWAY
Anal can be a dealbreaker — anything can be a dealbreaker — and Liz Lemon never said dealbreakers had to be fair. But dealbreakers do cut both ways, meaning your partner is free to say, “I’m gonna break up with you if I can’t fuck your ass with my giant dick,” ANAL, but you’re free to say to him, “If you pressure me to do things that don’t feel good — and trying to shove a plug in my ass without warning did not feel good — I’m gonna dump your ass before we can figure out whether your dick feels good in mine.”
As prices of admission go, ANAL, having butt sex that doesn’t feel good is too steep a price to pay. Going without anal sex, on the other hand, is a price many have paid to be with someone they loved. If your “amazing” new partner with the giant dick isn’t willing to contemplate going without anal for you — if he can’t even entertain paying that price of admission — he probably doesn’t deserve your ass.
P.S. To make someone feel excited about exploring anal sex — to get them to open up — you have to make them feel physically and emotionally safe. Shoving a toy into someone’s ass without warning is great way to make them feel physically unsafe; threatening to break up with someone if they can’t take your giant dick up their ass is a great way to make them feel emotionally unsafe. If your boyfriend can’t see that he’s doing this all wrong, ANAL, it’s not just your ass he can’t be trusted with.
Got problems? Yes, you do! Email your question for the column to mailbox@savage.love; or record your question for the Savage Lovecast at savage.love/askdan; podcasts,
