Queen City Nerve - March 20, 2024

Elegance A LEGACY OF

Costume designer Margarette Joyner shifts the narrative with new exhibit BY

DEZANII LEWIS

Music: Alexa Jenson calls in backup pg. 8

Food: Charlotte’s most gluttonous food challenges pg. 10

PUBLISHER

JUSTIN LAFRANCOIS jlafrancois@qcnerve.com

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

RYAN PITKIN rpitkin@qcnerve.com

DIGITAL MANAGER

RAYNE ANTRIM rantrim@qcnerve.com

STAFF WRITERS

PAT MORAN pmoran@qcnerve.com

ANNIE KEOUGH akeough@qcnerve.com

ART DIRECTOR

AIDEN SIOBHAN aiden@triad-city-beat.com

AD SALES EXECUTIVE

RENN WILSON rwilson@qcnerve.com

ADVERTISING MEDIA COORDINATOR

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TABLE OF CONTENTS

NEWS & OPINION

4 Life, Part Two by Ryan Pitkin

Cat Williams advocates for organ donation following lung transplant

5 Lifeline: Ten Cool Things To Do in Two Weeks

ARTS & CULTURE

6 A Legacy of Elegance by Dezanii Lewis Costume designer Margarette Joyner shifts the narrative with new exhibit

MUSIC

8 Songs for Living by Pat Moran

Alexa Jenson’s indie rock cuts straight to the heart

9 Soundwave

FOOD & DRINK

10 Down the Hatch by Annie Keough The Charlotte area’s most gluttonous food challenges

LIFESTYLE

12 Puzzles

13 Aerin It Out by Aerin Spruill

13 Horoscope

14 Savage Love

Thanks to our contributors: Grant Baldwin, Aerin Spruill, Dezanii Lewis, Alexa Viscius, Braydon Curry and Dan Savage

LIFE, PART TWO

Cat Williams advocates for organ donation following lung transplant

BY RYAN PITKIN

Two things are immediately apparent upon viewing the video, a close-up shot of Cat Williams speaking into the camera from her hospital room in December 2020: she is struggling greatly, but she is going to keep fighting.

In the video, shot shortly after Williams’ double lung transplant, she fights through tears to get her short sentences out.

“Hard day, tough day,” she says in something between a whisper and a whimper. “I did walk six laps today with a nurse … on a bad pain day. I’m shaking so much … But I progress. I’m gonna get out of here, and I’m gonna go home, and I’m gonna do all the things that I came in here for.”

When Queen City Nerve spoke with Williams in March 2020 for an article titled “A Look at the Life of a Resident at Risk,” just being able to film that video was a dream that felt so far away. COVID-19 had just led to shutdowns across the country, and Williams was unsure how any of it would play out.

A lifelong cystic fibrosis patient, Williams’ condition was worsening. She needed a transplant, though at the time she was not quite sick enough to be placed near the top of the waiting list. She found herself in an awkward limbo, not wanting to get more sick in order to be prioritized, but desperately in need of the operation.

In the months after our March 2020 interview, Williams would become sicker, which led to her being accepted as a potential transplant patient at Duke University Hospital — just the beginning of an exhaustive months-long process.

“I was basically just trying to survive. I was dying,” Williams recalls now. “I was on a lot of pill medication, tons of antibiotics, tons of side effects. I weighed, like, 92 pounds. I was on oxygen … You’d get tired halfway through a plate of food, or just trying to do any kind of basic anything. Walking the dog was hard, and I was living alone, and I was trying to take care of myself. And so the only way out for me was this lung transplant.”

On Dec. 17, 2020, Williams got the call: Duke had a pair of lungs for her. She had already moved to

Durham to be closer to the hospital as part of the pre-operation process, so she was nearby when the call came in. Her mother, who had moved with her as her primary caretaker, took her to the hospital but could not come in due to COVID-19.

Williams was alone.

They asked her what song she would like to hear as she went under. She picked Yo-Yo Ma. She woke up the next day, heavily sedated, not fully comprehending what had happened, but breathing through a new pair of lungs.

At that time, of course, she still needed plenty of help from machines, but over the next 51 days — twice the average hospital stay following a lung transplant — she fought through the bad pain days and relearning how to walk until she was discharged in February 2021.

Tough days were still ahead — continued pulmonary rehab, a rejection scare, depression and other obstacles — but Williams had received her second chance. Her lungs currently function at about 70% of their capacity compared to the 17% she experienced pre-transplant.

Now as she continues to clear some of those outstanding obstacles, Williams is looking forward to the next chapter in her life and speaking out about the benefits of organ donation.

‘We’ve been abandoned’

Even before COVID, Williams has long been a politically active person, though she didn’t speak much about disability issues until one incident inspired her to start.

As she remembers it, Williams was standing in line for food in a public establishment with an oxygen tank in tow, something that had only recently become a requirement for her as her condition worsened. That’s when a stranger approached her and told her, unsolicited, that she likely deserved her condition because she was a smoker. Williams, a cystic fibrosis (CF) patient since birth who has never smoked a single cigarette, was dumbfounded.

“It kind of radicalized me because I wasn’t really out about CF at all in my life,” she says. “And that’s when I became a sort of online activist, just deciding, ‘I’m not taking this bullshit.’”

The need for an oxygen tank had turned Williams’ invisible disability into a visible one, and she immediately saw a difference in how people looked at and treated her.

When COVID clamped down on America, she thought it would lead to a reckoning over disabled people and other vulnerable populations. For a short time, it did.

“At the height of COVID when everyone accepted we were in the pandemic and most people were masking and people were isolating, it kind of felt like, ‘Okay, we’re all in this together. You’re now seeing what a lot of disabled people go through, and we’re all in this together and things are changing,’” she says. “I really had hope that people were going to be more careful now.”

Rather quickly, masking became a politicized issue, and as time went on, even those who had originally been willing to make the smallest sacrifices began to refuse. In the years since her transplant, Williams has run into health care workers who refuse to mask, including a personal physical therapist who stopped working with her because Williams asked that she mask up.

With the virus still active, Williams has limited her trips mostly to the grocery store and pulmonary rehab and doesn’t engage much with other people during those visits. She adds that, in recent months, pressure has built for those few remaining people like herself who mask to unmask.

She points to a recent NPR article in which the spouse of a man who had suffered from a severe case of long COVID speaks about how much of a burden he is because he still takes precautions to protect himself from another bout of the debilitating illness.

“We’ve kind of been abandoned, but people constantly say either, ‘Well, you should just live your life, you’re just anxious,’ or they say, ‘Well, just live at home. Don’t go out,’ and it’s like, but we have to go to hospitals. We have to go to pharmacies. I’m lucky I don’t have to go on public transit. We should still, as a community, mask in places where our most vulnerable people still have to go.”

Visit qcnerve.com/cat-williams-transplant to read the rest of the story, including how “inspiration porn” negatively affected Williams’ recovery and her newfound passion for organ donation.

COURTESY CAT WILLIAMS

CAT WILLIAMS VISITS REP. JEFF JACKSON POST-TRANSPLANT TO DISCUSS DISABILITY ISSUES.

MEDIA LITERACY MATTERS: CURRENT LANDSCAPE, STUDENT ACTIONS, AND FUTURE DIRECTIONS

In a world where misinformation, disinformation, and deep fakes abound while a political movement paints the press as a hostile enemy, media literacy is as important as ever. Join faculty, students and researchers from UNC Charlotte for a half-day conference on how to use critical thinking and rhetorical reasoning to find, evaluate and create information in online environments. Queen City Nerve editor-in-chief Ryan Pitkin will kick things off as the keynote speaker, followed by a student showcase, a panel featuring members of the Niner Times managerial board, and faculty “lightning talks.”

More: Free; March 21, 8:30 a.m.-12:45 p.m.; UNC Charlotte’s J. Murrey Atkins Library, 9201 University City Blvd.; tinyurl.com/MediaLiteracyMatters

YOUNG DEATH GOD, MC HOMELESS, MIKAL KHILL, B-VILLAINOUS, RED JESSE

Young Death God spits righteous venom over chainsaw grindcore on manifestos like “Pissin Me Off.” Rapper MC Homeless’ tracks range from indie funk to dystopian musique concrete. On his vHanity IV EP, Mikal kHill turns from his golden age hip-hop work with The TroubleShooters to evocative internalsoundtrack instrumentals. Multitudinous voices escape from the prismatic mind of B-Villainous on creepy-funny EP Cartoon Tracks. As Red Jesse, Charlotte MC Jesse Boykin Kimmel pivots to personal acoustic indie pop on EP Blue Green: Love Me Still. More: $12; March 21, 8 p.m.; The Milestone, 3400 Tuckaseegee Road; themilestone.club

ART AFTER DARK: SOUTHERN DIGITAL

The Gantt Center celebrating one year of its digital arts studio, MODA — the Mecca of Digital Arts. Southern Digital is a collection of experiences that highlight Southern digital content, influencers, music, and other areas that reflect the future of Southern Black culture. Catch a screening of Carolina Noise, Nigel Malone’s exploration of the unique hiphop contributions coming from NC, and a slew of other installations, activations and exhibitions like Kalin Renee Devone’s “Everyday Items” installation, which turns the grocery shopping experience into a visually stunning vibe.

More: Free; March 22, 6-10 p.m.; Harvey B. Gantt Center, 551 S. Tryon St.; tinyurl.com/SouthernDigital

QUEERLY: A VARIETY SHOW

This celebration of the local queer creative scene will include drag performances, stand-up comedy and live music in the heart of Plaza Midwood. Featured comic Shane O’Laine is a local trans man who has helped uplift his peers through the launch of AQRONYM Entertainment, which helps find work for LGBTQ+, female-identifying and BIPOC artists. Formed from the ashes of four-piece Dust & Ashes, Americana duo Carolina Down Boys dropped their 5011 EP last August, featuring solemn songs that reminisce on growing up queer in the rural Bible Belt.

More: $7; March 23, 9 p.m.; Petra’s, 1919 Commonwealth Ave.; petrasbar.com

OPEN WIDE THE DOOR EXHIBIT OPENING

Charlotte Museum of History is set to unveil the firstever museum exhibit about Mary Cardwell Dawson, a North Carolina native who founded the nation’s first successful Black opera company in 1941. Born two hours north of Charlotte in Madison, Dawson was a trailblazer in the world of classical music, launching the National Negro Opera Company in 1941. The exhibit includes rarely seen photographs of the company and historical documents as well as original costumes from the company’s productions. Through videos and audio stations, the exhibit also provides viewers with a broader look at the world of opera and the contributions of people of color to the art form.

More: Free with admission; March 26, ongoing; Charlotte Museum of History, 3500 Shamrock Drive; charlottemuseum.org

WILLIAM FITZSIMMONS, BAERD

With his quietly passionate vocals and deeply personal lyrics, William Fitzsimmons evokes the shade of intimate and somber English singersongwriter Nick Drake. Fitzsimmons guards the meaning of his songs, and his delicate, dynamic finger-picked guitar figures bolster Fitzsimmons’ mysterious intensity. On “It’s All Happening Now,” Boston progressive-folk band BAERD weave meditative guitars, world music beats and hushed husky vocals into a skein of folk, Americana, R&B and the acoustic melancholia of Led Zeppelin. More: $25-28; March 26, 7:30 p.m.; Evening Muse, 3227 N. Davidson St.; eveningmuse.com

FETCH TIGER, WILLINGDON, LEONARDO SOLIS/DINGZUI

On “Fighter,” which kicks off Fetch Tiger’s debut LP Walking to Camera, the Brooklyn/London duo weaves crooning vocals, subliminal synths and guitars ranging from plangent to fuzzed-out to craft a melancholy indie-pop gem. Charlotte’s Willingdon tills a similar emotional furrow on “It’s Not Over,” an indie prog-rock epic featuring a spoken-word collage, heavenly synths, emotive vocals, chugging guitars and a coda of mysterious, majestic noise. Leonardo Solis is best known for crafting ethereal soundscapes for wife Kellie’s sensual pop songs in Solis. Here he unleashes his sonic wizardry in solo guise.

More: $7; March 28, 9 p.m.; Petra’s, 1919 Commonwealth Ave.; petrasbar.com

RATBOYS, DUCKS LTD.

On “It’s Alive,” Chicago indie-rockers Ratboys spin a wary guitar jangle that recalls Tanya Donnelly and Belly. With a voice like pealing bells, Julia Steiner wistfully sings about witnessing and accepting change. “I feel it all, frozen in my house/ All around, it’s in the stars/ It’s speeding toward the sign…” Meanwhile, Dave Sagan’s fiery guitar fills are laced with decaying reverb. Toronto indie-rock duo Ducks Ltd. craft frenetic guitar-driven indie rock that’s both anxious and breezy. Sounding similar to 1980s English indie outfit The Housemartins, the duo sings about coping while everything collapses around them.

More: $17.50; April 1, 8 p.m.; Snug Harbor, 1228 Gordon St.; snugrock.com

IF ONLY YOU KNEW: THE EXPERIENCE OF BEING AN IMMIGRANT TEACHER

Astrid “Emily” Francis found herself as the head of household in Guatemala at age 13, supporting and raising her siblings after her mother migrated to the United States. Eventually she guided her siblings through the arduous journey north, arriving as unaccompanied and undocumented minors who spoke no English. At the time, Francis had a 6thgrade education. Now, she is a dual alumna of UNC Charlotte and a nationally-recognized teacher who speaks at venues nationwide to raise awareness of the challenges faced by many children who are new to the United States.

More: Free; April 2, 4:30-5:30 p.m.; UNC Charlotte’s Fretwell Building, Room 113, 9203 Mary Alexander Road; tinyurl.com/WitnessInResidence

THE FLAMINGO REVUE PRESENTS: GREATEST HITS

As reported in our Spring Guide issue in early March, The Flamingo Revue started as a way for friends to have fun together back in April 2019, but has since turned into a post-pandemic catalyst for the revival of burlesque in Charlotte. The Greatest Hits show will feature some of the Flock’s most beloved acts from the last several years — from classic to gritty, dinosaurs to pizza, and everything in between. Look for performances from Anita Tool, Bettie Bupkiss, BoomBoom Bathory, Danger Angel, Dark N’ Stormy, Delilah d’Isceaux, Dravyn, Ducky Delight, Ebony Delight, Edie Edison, Ellie Cerceaux, Jayne Bangs and more.

More: $20-$25; April 6, 9 p.m.; Visulite Theatre, 1615 Elizabeth Ave.; flamingorevue.com

FETCH TIGER Courtesy of Fetch Tiger 3/28

RATBOYS

Photo by Alexa Viscius 4/1

A LEGACY OF EL EGA NCE

Costume designer Margarette Joyner shifts the narrative with new exhibit

BY D EZANII LEWIS

When people think of Black history, African history, or the like, they tend to gravitate to the horrors of said history.

While learning about the atrocities that occurred during past time periods remains important, other stories exist. In fact, it’s just as critical to spread those narratives that depict Black people as more than being enslaved.

It’s those untold stories that Margarette Joyner seeks to explore in her exhibit, A Legacy of Elegance, currently showing at the Projective Eye Gallery at UNC Charlotte’s Dubois Center in Uptown.

“A lot of people think that African American history began with slavery,” Joyner said. “It did not. We are a royal people — always have been, still are, always will be.”

Joyner’s exhibit showcases 12 articles of clothing that she designed alongside archival photos from the 19th century. The pieces are meant to highlight the ways in which Black people have lived a life of elegance over the years.

Joyner, a professor who teaches costume design at UNC Charlotte, combines historical designs with African fabrics to illustrate a story that differs from those shared in many schools.

“My idea was to take our past and merge it with the present,” she explained. “That’s why I used African fabrics and merged them with contemporary fabric to show that we come from royalty. Then I embellished all the costumes with cowry shells because that’s very important in our culture. It’s a sign of wealth and prestige.”

Historically, cowry shells were used as currency in various countries throughout Africa. Though they are no longer used as such, their significance remains an important facet of Black and African history.

The 12 pieces showcased in A Legacy of Elegance took about a month each for Joyner to make, with the exhibit coming together over the course of a

year. Some pieces took longer than others — the cowry shells alone took a month to sew on to the costumes.

Joyner said she got her inspiration for the costumes from lesser known history stories such as that of Joseph Bologne, Chevalier de Saint-Georges, a French-Caribbean musician and composer, and Sarah Forbes Bonetta, a formerly enslaved African girl who was brought to Queen Victoria’s court and became her goddaughter.

“When I saw [Bonetta] and she was dressed in beautiful, regal garments, I was like, ‘That’s what I want to see. That’s what I want to display,’” she said. “Then I saw the movie about [Chevalier de SaintGeorges]. I was like, ‘That’s part of who we are.’”

The symbolism afforded by the carefully curated blends of cowry shells, fabric, and design elements come together to serve as the basis for a deeper dive, informing attendees of a history they may not have otherwise known.

Elegance defined

The vintage Victorian styles in Joyner’s costumes are coupled with vibrant African prints — splashes of reds, yellows, blues, pinks, and purples adorn each piece, creating a moving combination.

Much like her creations, the stories that have inspired them are powerful, such as the story of an enslaved man named Nat who would walk a full day from his plantation to see his wife and children, then a day back.

“That’s some powerful love, you know what I mean?” Joyner said. “I like to tap into the beauty of us, the humanity of us. And that’s part of the reason for this exhibit: to show that we’re an elegant, royal, beautiful people. Folks focus in on the horrors and the tragedy of enslavement, which it was, it was disgusting. It was one of the most horrendous things that was ever invented.

“However, we also, even in the midst of all that oppression and all that hate and all that pain, we still loved, we still cared about each other,” she continued. “We still had dignity, and we found ways to deal with all of that by loving on one another, by embracing our culture.”

While the vision is clear now, Joyner said she didn’t know why she started making the pieces in the first place.

“I am a strong believer in gifts from the universe,” she said. “When I first started this, I had no idea why I was doing it or what it was for, but I felt a calling to be able to do this and then it evolved.”

The vision came into focus when Joyner learned about Bonetta and Chevalier de Saint-Georges. Her inspiration to use African fabrics came from the knowledge that both of her muses would often revisit Africa whenever they were sick in order to be nursed back to health.

Joyner sources most of her fabrics from Richmond, though plenty came from her own personal collection, accumulated over the years from various sources.

Once she selects the fabrics, she’s no longer in charge, she explained of her process.

“Once I have the fabrics and patterns I let them speak to me, letting me know what they want to be,” she said.

Now that it’s all come together, Joyner said she hopes that her exhibit will be successful in telling the story she wants to tell.

“I hope when anybody, little boys and little girls or anybody comes to see this, they can see themselves as part of that royal heritage,” she said.

An educational role takes its toll

Though Joyner, currently a visiting assistant professor of Costume Design in UNC Charlotte’s Theatre department, resides in Gastonia and said she has “fallen in love” with Charlotte, like so many others in the city, she was not born here.

Joyner hails from Richmond, Virginia, where she gained a wealth of knowledge from her previous experiences. She taught at Virginia Union University, an HBCU in Richmond, as an assistant professor of Theatre, working as a “department of one,” as she put it.

“That meant that I taught the classes, I produced the shows, I directed, I wrote, I designed; I did everything,” she said.

After six years at Virginia Union, the school underwent organizational changes that didn’t work for Joyner, so she decided to leave. She wasn’t sure of her next direction initially, but she quickly got her answer after she put out several applications and got a reply from Colonial Williamsburg.

PHOTO BY GRANT BALDWIN

MARGARETTE JOYNER

ARTS

There, she portrayed an enslaved Black woman named Mama Succordia. The experience had a profound effect on Joyner, who said she found both good and bad in it.

“It was beautiful and horrible,” she said. “It was beautiful because I got to give voice to people who didn’t have one, even though I was censored as to what I could say because I was literally portraying an enslaved person. Whenever I wrote a program for a solo performance as Mama Succordia, I could say what Mama Succordia could have said and then people had to listen.”

Joyner took what she learned through her lived experience at Colonial Williamsburg to put toward other projects. In Charlotte, she worked with the Historic Rosedale plantation in November 2023, designing costumes for folks performing African American Ring Shout, a tradition historically rooted in Africa and created by enslaved people in the Carolinas and Georgia.

There were, of course, more troubling aspects to portraying an enslaved woman day in and day out, made worse by the ignorance of some patrons.

“One of the most common questions was, ‘Did you have a good master?’” she said. “And can you imagine representing this enslaved person and I have to explain to these people that you cannot put the word ‘good’ and ‘master’ in the same sentence?”

She would often have to debate guests, as they

would feel that, because the people who enslaved Mama Succordia clothed her and may not have physically abused her, they weren’t necessarily bad people.

“I would have to explain, I’m dressed this way not because I choose to, but because I’m representing his wealth,” she said. “No, they don’t beat me, but I cannot leave when I want to. No, I can’t speak out in public unless I get their permission. So that’s not a good person. A good person would not own another person. A good person would not deem me property, put a price tag on me, buy and sell my children at will, even if they’re being nice about it. That’s not a good person. So that was the hard part, is folks wanting us to make them feel better about history.”

After three and a half years reenacting the life of the enslaved, Joyner had enough. She left Colonial Williamsburg and applied for a job at UNC Charlotte.

Today, Joyner still struggles with just how little she knew about Mama Succordia beyond her apparent value to white traders: 10 pounds. Aside from that, all Joyner knew was her name, her owners’ names and that she was an elder.

“That’s it; there was nothing else,” Joyner said. Because our stories were not important. But they are important — they weren’t important to [enslavers].

So I want to show in probably all of the work that I do that there’s more to us than slavery, there’s more to us than oppression, even though we deal with it daily. There’s far more to us than just that.”

PHOTO BY GRANT BALDWIN

PIECES FROM JOYNER’S UNC CHARLOTTE EXHIBIT

SONGS FOR LI VING

Alexa Jenson’s indie rock cuts straight to the heart

BY PAT MORA N

A swell of gospel organ breaks against a crag of jangly guitars, just as Alexa Jenson’s gale-force vocals wheel in like a storm front.

“I know you think I’m a mystery tonight/ But tomorrow you’ll be gone / At the slightest peek of daylight...”

Jenson’s 2018 single “Daylight” cradles your emotions and commands your attention. Amid a danceable pop melody, a rocking groove and boldly vulnerable lyrics, Jenson’s supple voice ranges from powerful declaration to free-falling alt-country lilt.

“I can let you go leave you on the shelf/ No you won’t fuck with my mental health/ You’re only doing this to yourself...”

Despite its origins in a teenage romance that crashed and burned, “Daylight” isn’t a heartbreak song, Jenson insists.

“It’s kind of a ‘Fuck you’ song,” the 24 year old singer-songwriter says. “I would like to feel that way all the time, justified in my feelings, and not caring what someone else has done to me ... It’s not always that way, so I write in a wishful way. It’s the way I want to feel.”

Jenson performs her vulnerable yet empowering songs on April 4 at Petra’s. Though she launched her career at age 16 as a solo performer, the vocalist and guitarist will be joined onstage by drummer Matt Conte and bassist/synth player Josh Rosales.

Jenson, who has not dropped new music since 2018, says the set will contain some new songs including a “fun and energetic” tune entitled “Just You Wait,” scheduled to be released as a single in May.

“It’s one we’ve been playing for several years as a band,” Jenson says “It’s my teenage late ’90s/early 2000s indie pop band dream. It’s my favorite.”

What life sounds like

“High school is objectively hell,” Jenson says.

She’s not talking about any unending torment she experienced attending Cox Mill High School in Concord. Instead, Jenson’s high school hell was more like an endless waiting room, an antechamber that didn’t seem to connect to adulthood.

“I had a bad attitude about it,” Jenson remembers.

“I was like, ‘I’m too cool for school. I don’t need to be here. This isn’t real life.’”

She also didn’t resonate with what teachers and students deemed important.

“Once kids in high school got their cars, they were touring colleges, applying [to universities] and getting ready for the SATs,” Jenson says. “I got my license, and I was driving to open mics in the city every night.”

hazy memory where only Jenson’s vocal seems immediate. She is powerful yet controlled, emotive yet coo; Jenson’s performance feels poised on the cusp between revelation and meltdown, recalling country music’s high priestess of heartbreak and picking yourself back up, Patsy Cline.

In a way, “Fool in Love” acts as a culmination of Jenson’s childhood dreams and ambitions while pointing the way forward to the next stage in her life and career. Jenson was always singing as a child. She fell in love with pop music at age 5 when her mother took her to see a performance of the ABBA musical Mamma Mia. They bought the soundtrack on the way out of the show and Jenson sang the entire score in the minivan on the way home.

“I thought, ‘Wow, this is what life sounds like,’”’ Jenson says.

Singing became her creative focus, with the full support from her parents.

She recalls staying out until 2 a.m. at the Evening Muse’s Find Your Muse open mic then driving to school at 7 a.m. the next day.

High school was also where Jenson started pursuing songwriting in earnest. She had dabbled with writing songs at age 12, but when her virtual music production class required an original song as an assignment, she recorded her debut single “Fool in Love” on her iPhone and put a rough GarageBand mix of it up on SoundCloud.

Jenson remembers someone stopping her in a Harris Teeter parking lot to compliment her for the song.

In a version remixed by drummer/producer Timmy Fasano, “Fool in Love” is rendered as a gauzy,

“Growing up, becoming a young adult, and just dealing with life, [music] became an incredible outlet for me,” Jenson says.

Jenson first picked up a guitar when she was 12. After a few lessons, she struck out on her own, using the guitar as a tool to facilitate her songwriting.

“I realized, ‘I can sing. I can write my own thing, and I can put a melody to it and play it on guitar. This is magical,” Jenson says. “I consider myself a lyricist first, a singer second and guitarist last.” She participated in talent shows, sang in middle school choir and did some theatre in high school. Along the way, her tastes turned from ABBA to Billy Joel, then again to British pop group The 1975, after exhausting all the musical electives that sparked her

interest, Jenson withdrew from school activities and started playing solo at open mics.

In the process, she’s befriended and received immeasurable help from Joe Kuhlman, Don and Laurie Koster, owners of Evening Muse, where Jenson has built up her craft since those long nights at Find Your Muse when she was still in high school. Jenson also gives shout outs to singer-songwriter Dane Page, pianist/tattoo artist Elisa Sanchez, and Dollar Signs’ Erik Button and Dylan Wachman for their friendship, help and inspiration.

Becoming a band leader

After remixing Jenson’s “Fool in Love,” Fasano convinced her to record and release her five-song self-titled EP in 2018. The disc, produced by Fasano and Brandon Berg, features Jenson on guitar and vocals, Fasano on drums, and Berg on bass, keyboards and backing vocals. The project pairs “Fool in Love” and “Daylight” with three other tunes, the ethereal “Unrequited,” the plaintive yet restless “Mr. Curiosity,” and the deceptively jaunty-sounding country-punk tune “Roses,” which Jenson says was sparked by a nostalgic, bittersweet and brief reunion with an ex-boyfriend.

“And in July you moved away/ There was nothing that I could do to make you stay/ It doesn’t help that your parents don’t like me/ So I watched your U-Haul drive away...”

Right now, Jenson seems poised for another stage in her career. Although she appreciates the Queen City’s music scene and her place in it, she’s excited by her band’s first out-of-town gig in Richmond, Virginia this spring. She hopes to play more shows outside Charlotte in the coming year.

Jenson says she still plays solo gigs with her acoustic guitar, but prefers to rock out with the band these days.

“I have always loved a classic rock band,” she says. “Being on stage sometimes is so scary. It’s nice to have someone up there with you who knows exactly how you’re feeling.”

How her audience reacts and feels is important to Jenson too.

“The one thing that I love about pop music … is that you can [reveal] your truest emotions, and if you put a nice melody to it and give it a good beat, people will love it, even though they have no idea what it’s about,” Jenson says. “Then, one day someone will listen to the lyrics and [think], ‘Oh wow, that … actually makes me feel less alone.’ I hope that my music makes people feel not alone.”

PMORAN@QCNERVE.COM

ALEXA JENSON PERFORMS WITH HER NEW BACKING BAND

PHOTO BY BRAYDON CURRY

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 20

ROCK/PUNK/METAL

Ed Schrader’s Music Beat w/ Telepathetics, DRMOFO (Snug Harbor)

JAZZ/BLUES

Jazz Nights @ Canteen (Camp North End)

POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ

Beats @ Birdsong (Birdsong Brewing)

LATIN/WORLD/REGGAE

Drifting Roots w/ Two Burnt (Evening Muse)

Kristy & Friends (Goldie’s)

OPEN MIC

Singer/Songwriter Open Mic (The Rooster)

Variety Open Mic & Songwriters Circle (Starlight on 22nd)

THURSDAY, MARCH 21

ROCK/PUNK/METAL

I Hate Dave w/ Squirt Vile, SpaceDaddy & The Galactic Gogos (Petra’s)

Cherubs w/ Bog Loaf, Nerve Endings (Snug Harbor)

COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA

Josh Morningstar (Visulite Theatre)

Nicholas Jamerson & The Morning Jays w/ Justin Clyde Williams (Evening Muse)

POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ

Party 101 w/ Matt Bennett (The Underground)

TimaLikesMusic: That’s 90s Love (Neighborhood Theatre)

FUNK/JAM BANDS

Shana Blake’s Musical Menagerie (Smokey Joe’s Cafe & Bar)

HIP-HOP/SOUL/R&B

Ledisi (Ovens Auditorium)

The DOAP Concert: Women’s Edition (Crown Station)

Young Death God & MC Homeless w/ Mikal Hill, B-Villainous, Red Jesse (The Milestone)

OPEN MIC

The Potluck: An Open Mic and Safe Space for Creatives (Heist Brewery NoDa)

FRIDAY, MARCH 22

ROCK/PUNK/METAL

The Lenny Federal Band (Comet Grill)

Stigmata Flex w/ Digital Dolls, Auroras Hope, Caldera, Cigarettes at Sunset (The Rooster)

POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ

Jon Batiste (The Fillmore)

Sidequest w/ DJ B3DH3AD, DJ RPG, Summy, FZXXX (The Milestone)

Global Grooves feat. See Bird Go, Domii, DJ Extraa, Zzzzaappp (Snug Harbor)

JAZZ/BLUES

Sy Smith (Middle C Jazz)

COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA

Aaron Lewis (Ovens Auditorium)

Cody Webb w/ Matt Tucker Band, Out of the Blue (Coyote Joe’s)

Eliot Bronson w/ Mando Saenz (Evening Muse)

Kendell Marvel (Evening Muse)

FUNK/JAM BANDS

Ben Gatlin Band (Smokey Joe’s Cafe & Bar)

CLASSICAL/INSTRUMENTAL

Charlotte Symphony: Wagner & Strauss (Knight Theater)

SATURDAY, MARCH 23

ROCK/PUNK/METAL

Cody Parks & The Dirty South w/ Lil Skritt, The Loose Lugnuts (Snug Harbor)

Read-Only Time Travel w/ Ashley Virginia, Groove Skeletons (Starlight on 22nd)

COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA

Driftwood w/ Fox and Bones (Evening Muse)

Liam Purcell w/ Cane Mill Road (Heist Brewery NoDa)

Haley Heynderickx w/ Sheers (Neighborhood Theatre)

POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ

Waterparks (The Fillmore)

Be Our Guest: Spinning ’90s & ’00s Disney (The Underground)

HIP-HOP/SOUL/R&B

Tamia & Joe (Bojangles Coliseum)

JAZZ/BLUES

Sy Smith (Middle C Jazz)

Last Minute Blues Band (Smokey Joe’s Cafe & Bar)

LATIN/WORLD/REGGAE

Vadim Kolpakov Group w/ Sincopao Flamenco (Canteen, Camp North End)

CLASSICAL/INSTRUMENTAL

Charlotte Symphony Youth Orchestra Spring Concert (Knight Theater)

Charlotte Symphony: Wagner & Strauss (Knight Theater)

SUNDAY, MARCH 24

ROCK/PUNK/METAL

Noahfinnce (The Underground)

Blankstate. w/ Jay Hoff, Rosary, Big the Cat (The Milestone)

The Red Mountain w/ And I Become Death, Skulls & Whiskey, Lo (The Rooster)

Betty White Bronco (Tommy’s Pub)

POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ

Soul Sunday feat. Guy Nowchild (Starlight on 22nd)

SINGER-SONGWRITER/ACOUSTIC

Allison & Jake w/ Tommy Keys (Goldie’s)

HIP-HOP/SOUL/R&B

The FRXSH Experience (Neighborhood Theatre)

A CAPPELLA

Kings Return (Booth Playhouse)

MONDAY, MARCH 25

JAZZ/BLUES

The Bill Hanna Legacy Jazz Session (Petra’s)

COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA

Charlotte Bluegrass Mondays (Smokey Joe’s Cafe & Bar)

OPEN MIC

Find Your Muse Open Mic feat. Ryan Lockhart (Evening Muse)

TUESDAY, MARCH 26

ROCK/PUNK/METAL

Red Rocking Chair (Comet Grill)

Encre Noire w/ Cadaver Delende, Chill Panic, Lo & Yung Burg (The Milestone)

Nicki Minaj (Spectrum Center)

POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ

Julian Lage (The Underground)

COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA

William Fitzsimmons w/ BÆRD (Evening Muse)

EXPERIMENTAL/MIXED-GENRE/FESTIVAL Channeling Granny: Literally Music (3102 VisArt)

FUNK/JAM BANDS

Futch Brothers (Goldie’s)

Jenn Ford w/ An Archaic Agenda, Aaron Chance Wilson (Tommy’s Pub)

OPEN MIC

Open Mic Night feat. The Smokin J’s (Smokey Joe’s Cafe & Bar)

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 27

ROCK/PUNK/METAL

Otoboke Beaver (The Underground)

Litter Kitten w/ Girl Brutal, Solemn Shapes, Bleak, DJ

NPC ( The Milestone)

Restless Spirit w/ Temple of the Fuzz Witch, Cosmic Reaper (Snug Harbor)

SINGER-SONGWRITER/ACOUSTIC

Ellie Morgan (Goldie’s)

JAZZ/BLUES

Jazz Nights at Canteen (Camp North End)

POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ

Beats @ Birdsong (Birdsong Brewing)

OPEN MIC

Singer/Songwriter Open Mic (The Rooster) Variety Open Mic (Starlight on 22nd)

THURSDAY, MARCH 28

ROCK/PUNK/METAL

Between You & Me (Amos’ Southend)

Discoveries w/ Snake Father, Divisive, Violent End, Refelct//Refine (The Milestone)

Fetch Tiger w/ Willingdon, Dingzui (Petra’s)

Tyrant w/ Dysplacer, Night Attack, Neverfall (Skylark Social Club)

SINGER-SONGWRITER/ACOUSTIC

Garrett Huffman Band w/ Bourbon Sons Duo (Goldie’s)

POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ

Sound Makers Social Vol. 2 (Crown Station)

HIP-HOP/SOUL/R&B

Arin Ray (The Underground)

FUNK/JAM BANDS

Shana Blake’s Musical Menagerie (Smokey Joe’s Cafe & Bar)

Sam Fribush w/ Sonny Miles (Snug Harbor)

FRIDAY, MARCH 29

ROCK/PUNK/METAL

The Lenny Federal Band (Comet Grill)

Tourneforte w/ Riley!, Summerbruise, Nervouse Surface (The Milestone)

GWAR (The Underground)

Patois Counselors w/ Public Circuit, sayurblaires (Petra’s)

JAZZ/BLUES

Keiko Matsui (Booth Playhouse)

Pat Metheny (Knight Theater)

Lee Ritenour (Middle C Jazz)

COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA

David Graham & The Eskimo Brothers (Evening Muse)

Wayne Hancock w/ Adam Lawrence (Neighborhood Theatre)

POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ

Inzo (Blackbox Theater)

Deep Fried Disco (Snug Harbor)

SATURDAY, MARCH 30

ROCK/PUNK/METAL

Milestone Prom: Petrov, Peach Rings & more (The Milestone)

The Bleeps w/ Saluda, Skewer Rat (Tommy’s Pub)

SINGER-SONGWRITER/ACOUSTIC

Celestial Company (Birdsong Brewing)

Clay Johnson & the Hard Promises (Primal Brewery)

David Gillespie w/ Landon Byrd (Starlight on 22nd)

JAZZ/BLUES

Peter Karp & Bob Margolin (Evening Muse)

Lee Ritenour (Middle C Jazz)

POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ

Dirty Loops (The Underground)

HIP-HOP/SOUL/R&B

Alan Charmer w/ Shows, Boy A/C (Snug Harbor) COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA

Sam Barber (Amos’ Southend)

Wheeler Walker Jr. (The Fillmore)

Palmyra w/ Elonzo Wesley, Low Groves (Petra’s)

FAMILY

The Jolly Lollies (Camp North End)

SUNDAY, MARCH 31

HIP-HOP/SOUL/R&B

Nascar Aloe (The Underground)

JAZZ/BLUES

Omari & the Hellhounds (Comet Grill)

COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA

Jack Bird w/ Rowland Taylor, Kelby Clark (Tommy’s Pub)

POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ

Matt Hansen (Neighborhood Theatre)

Hazy Sunday (Petra’s)

Soul Sunday feat. Guy Nowchild (Starlight on 22nd)

VISIT QCNERVE.COM FOR THE FULL SOUNDWAVE LISTING.

DOWN THE HATCH

The Charlotte area’s most gluttonous food challenges

BY A NNIE KEOUGH

All the way back to 1867, when a reporter in Illinois documented Dr. Henry Harmes’ disturbing feat of ingesting five dozen raw eggs in one 30-minute sitting, Americans have been consumed with food challenges.

OK, that may be a little extreme, but there has for many years been a certain subset of overzealous restaurant patrons who take pride in completing food challenges, egged on only by the restaurants that supply them and maybe a few troublesome friends. Amateaur and competitive eaters alike seek the specialized glory earned by finishing several pounds of food within a predetermined time limit for prizes and/or bragging rights.

According to Benny Pennello’s, an amateaur eater is considered anyone who has not entered into a competitive eating contest nor won a cash prize for a food challenge and is not training for a competitive eating event, while a professional eater is a competitive eater (sponsored or non-sponsored), an aspiring competitive eater or anyone who has won a food challenge with a cash prize.

Most challenges follow the same general rules: no bathroom breaks, no vomiting on the premises during or after the competition, no sharing the food with another person and no leaving the table area.

With that in mind, we have compiled a list of Charlotte-area food challenges ranked from the quickest, meaning patrons are given the least amount of time to finish, to the longest.

JackBeagles “Wicked Challenge”

TIME LIMIT: 15 minutes

CRITERIA: Contestants must finish 1 pound of mac & cheese, 1 pound of waffle fries, 1 pound of pulled pork, and 1 pound of coleslaw all topped with JackBeagles’ Wicked hot sauce.

PRIZE: Winners get the meal free, a T-shirt and a spot on the Wall of Fame.

LOCATIONS: 3213 N. Davidson St.; 1404 W. Morehead St.; 125 S Main St., Mt Holly

Benny’s “The Benny’s Challenge”

TIME LIMIT: 28 minutes

CRITERIA: Contestants must sign up for the

challenge and pay a $35 entry fee before competing. There are no dietary substitutions. Contestants must eat an entire 28-inch pizza within the time limit. If you’ve never been to Benny’s before, you may want to take a gander at what a 28-inch pizza actually looks like before you make any big commitments; these things barely fit in most cars.

PRIZE: Competitive eaters are eligible to win $100. Amateur eaters are eligible to win $280. Winners will also receive a “Benny’s Challenge” T-shirt, have their photo posted on Benny’s social media pages and have bragging rights.

NOTE: Benny Pennello’s told Queen City Nerve that between its two Charlotte restaurants (Benny Pennello’s in NoDa and Benny Ferrovia’s in South End) only four or five people have successfully completed the Benny’s Challenge. The record to beat is 11.5 slices in 10 minutes, set at Benny’s 2022 Invitational Pizza Eating Competition in Virginia.

LOCATIONS: Benny Pennello’s, 2909 N. Davidson St., Suite 100; Benny Ferrovia’s, 340 W. Tremont Ave., Suite 120

Jukebox Pub Deli Grill’s “Fat Biatch”

TIME LIMIT: 30 minutes

CRITERIA: Contestants must eat three Fat Biatch sandwiches within the time limit. The Fat Biatch has

nacho cheese, beer-battered onion rings, crinkle-cut fries, a mix of bell-peppers and jalapenos, chicken strips and shaved-steak on a bread bun.

PRIZE: Winners receive a $50 gift certificate to put toward the $40 meal.

LOCATION: 5801 W. Highway 74, Indian Trail

Hwy 55’s “Hwy 55 Burger Challenge”

TIME LIMIT: 30 minutes

CRITERIA: Contestants must finish around three and a half pounds of meat on a burger bun with at least four toppings, a side of fries and a 24 oz. soft drink.

PRIZE: Winners get the $34.99 meal on the house. LOCATIONS: 4859 Old York Road, #104, Rock Hill, SC; 683 SC-9 Bypass, Lancaster, SC

Morgan’s Dairy Bar’s “Cow Pile” Ice Cream Sundae Challenge

TIME LIMIT: 30 minutes

CRITERIA: Contestants must finish 25 scoops

of ice cream with a maximum of eight flavors, which equals right around 5 pounds of ice cream. Contestants must also choose five different toppings.

PRIZE: Winners get the $49.99 meal for free.

LOCATION: 194 E. Dallas Road, Stanley (Gaston County)

Go Burrito’s “Monster Burrito Longboard Challenge”

TIME LIMIT: 30 minutes

CRITERIA: Contestants must schedule this challenge 24 hours in advance. Contestants must finish five burrito tortillas filled with two scoops of four different meats (steak, chicken, shredded beef, marinated pork) on top of two scoops each of white rice, brown rice, pinto beans and black beans. The burrito is filled with lettuce, pico de gallo, a spicy habanero salsa, sour cream and topped with queso cheese sauce and red enchilada sauce, all weighing in at around 6 pounds.

PRIZE: Winners get the $30 meal free, a T-shirt and a spot on the Wall of Fame. Losers get a spot on the Wall of Shame. The challenge is offered at most Go Burrito locations.

LOCATION: 115 W Fisher St., Salisbury (Rowan County)

COURTESY BENNY’S

BENNY’S PIZZA

COURTESY HWY 55

THE HWY 55 BURGER

COURTESY MORGAN’S DAIRY BAR

THE COW PILE

COURTESY GO BURRITO

TWO MONSTER BURRITOS

COURTESY CINNAHOLIC MONSTER STACK

FOOD & DRINK FEATURE

Cinnaholic’s “Monster Stack Vegan Cinnamon Roll”

TIME LIMIT: 1 hour

CRITERIA: Contestants must eat 6 pounds of vegan cinnamon rolls topped with six big scoops and two smaller scoops of chocolate chip cookie dough.

PRIZE: Winners get the $95 meal free, a t-shirt and a spot on the restaurant’s Wall of Fame.

LOCATIONS: 6461 Old Monroe Road, Suite F, Indian Trail; 915 South Point Road, Suite F, Belmont; 3050 Derita Road, Suite 20,Concord

Mac’s Speed Shop’s “Fatboy Challenge”

TIME LIMIT: 1 hour

CRITERIA: Contestants must finish a 5-pound sandwich of red slaw, fried pickles, pulled pork, beef brisket, burger patties, applewood-smoked bacon, pimento cheese, queso blanco and 3 ounces of their spicy Mac’s Burnout Sauce all inside a 1-pound sourdough bun and served with a half-pound side of macaroni and cheese.

PRIZE: A winning contestants’ $77 meal is free and they receive a shirt and a place in the restaurant’s Hall of Fame.

NOTE: Popular UK YouTuber BeardMeatsFood, also ranked as the 15th best competitive eater in the world, completed the challenge at a Mac’s in Greensboro, finishing in just over 22 minutes. Don’t let his impressive time fool you, though; the challenge has also been failed 76 times, with each loser commemorated on the Wall of Shame.

This challenge is offered at all Mac’s Speed Shop locations.

LOCATIONS: 2414 Sandy Porter Road; 2511 South Blvd.; Concord Mills, 8021 Concord Mills Blvd., Concord; 142 E John St., Matthews

Bad Daddy’s “Fat Daddy Burger Challenge”

TIME LIMIT: 1 hour

CRITERIA: Contestants must eat 7 pounds worth of burgers, comprising five stacked 10-ounce burger patties layered with nine different types of cheese, tomatoes, lettuce, pickles, onions, three types of bacon (eight jalapeno, eight Applewood smoked, eight breaded and fried) and topped with a 3-ounce slider. The burger also comes with seven sides including regular fries, sweet potato fries, fried

pickles, onion rings, tater tots, fried deviled eggs and Bad Daddy’s fried homemade chips.

PRIZE: Winners receive the $75 meal free, a T-shirt and a photo on the Wall of Fame.

NOTE: Randy Santel, another popular YouTuber and competitive eater, filmed his successful attempt at the challenge, finishing just over 58 minutes. Only select Bad Daddy’s locations participate in this challenge.

NEAREST PARTICIPATING LOCATION: 2211 E. Franklin Blvd., Gastonia

Whether you think the price of devouring a considerable amount of food is worth a T-shirt and a free meal or not, these challenges are in and around Charlotte, waiting to be conquered. Good luck and happy eating.

AKEOUGH@QCNERVE.COM

Adv tise With Us

COURTESY MAC’S SPEED SHOP

MAC’S FATBOY

COURTESY BAD DADDY’S

FAT DADDY BURGER

AREIN’ IT OUT OM G, OMA KASE

A fake birthday double date to remember

BY AERIN SPRUILL

“We’ve got a birthday tonight, is that right?”

I could feel the embarrassment rushing to my cheeks as I lifted my head and realized the question was directed at me. I’d forgotten that my girlfriend thought it would be funny to say we were celebrating my birthday when she secured our resy for an omakase experience. And of course, me and the boo were the first to arrive.

Having forgotten her prank in the most critical of moments, I short-circuited. Stumbling over my words, I finally mustered the courage to say, “Um yes, me, it’s my birthday.”

I flashed a glance over my shoulder to take mental note of the unimpressed look on my boyfriend’s face. The awkwardness was made all the more sweet by a stranger lifting their glass in a toast: “Happy birthday!”

I turned to my giggling bestie, only 16 courses and roughly two and a half more hours left to keep up this charade. Whoever said double dating wasn’t fun?!

Did you know that tucked inside Menya Daruma, a quaint ramen spot in Elizabeth, there’s another restaurant concept called Kappo En? Behind an unsuspecting door at the rear of Menya, a 10-seat speakeasy-style omakase experience delivers a sophisticated juxtaposition to the casual comfort and humility of ramen.

Chefs Tsuyoshi Ono and Yasuhiro Tabita stand behind the counter at the ready with a quiet confidence that reinforces omakase’s English translation: “Chef’s choice.” Their silent poise and reverent nature give “Get ready to go to sushi church!” vibes.

The moody, minimalist, and modern ambiance provides the perfect backdrop for the bright pops of amuse-bouche color and flesh slices of fish to come.

I never thought I’d be the double-dating type. As an introverted only child, the thought of having to entertain not just one but three other people in an intimate setting always seemed like what nightmares were made of.

And yet, at that moment, I realized that double dates are really just an excuse for the ladies to get more face time while also hanging out with our boyfriends. Two birds, one stone? I kid, but strategically placing the guys on the outside, did create the perfect space for uninterrupted gabbing.

Shortly after everyone settled, the synchronized dance of slicing, garnishing and plating began. Wagyu tartare paired with yuzu and honey served on the smallest of taro chips — love at first bite. Nasu nibitashi; I don’t even like eggplant, surely this one won’t be for me? Wrong — love

at second bite.

That’s the thing about omakase: Even the tiniest of bites have the power to change your mind. Each course is a progressive challenge in texture, simplicity and balance.

Four courses in, I leaned over to whisper the question that many frown upon but everyone’s thinking into my bestie’s ear, “Is it bad that I’m already thinking about what I’m going to eat later?”

“Nope, we barely ate anything today.”

Her boyfriend leaned forward, “I’m already planning.”

See babe? That’s the kind of support I like to see.

By the time we reached course 13, anago, I realized my eyes were bigger than my stomach as I looked at a healthy chunk of grilled salt-water eel set over more perfectly cooked rice.

Every time boo and I go to dinner, he jokes about my inability to finish a good-sized meal, to which I stubbornly respond, “I’m super hungry today though.” My eyes caught his eyes, “Don’t force it,” he said with a smirk.

I may have relinquished a good portion of rice on that round, but force it I did, as I claimed the last bite of A5 Wagyu on course 15. I let out a sigh that would rival the physical act of undoing the button of your pants, instantly wishing I’d listened to boo when he suggested bringing a couple of Tums from home.

I’ve never been a fan of dessert, so waving my white flag, throwing the towel in and sticking a fork in me didn’t feel like giving up until the matcha monaka was placed in front of me. Matcha ice cream, red bean paste and strawberry sandwiched between two delicate wafers created the ultimate Japanese ice cream sammy.

Tasting menus rarely nail dessert for the sweet tooth averse. But this one, a rare work of art, was too tempting to forfeit a bite.

“Okay, now which is your favorite?” I probed our omakase-loving partners in crime one last time. For three, it was the intricately sliced simplicity of the hotate (scallop) nigiri topped with seaweed-infused salt (course four) while one remained firm on course 10: shima aji (striped jack) nigiri.

I think it goes without saying that it was one of the best fake-birthday double-date meals I’ve ever had from the roota to the toota.

*No freebies were gained under false birthday pretenses. But in our defense, my birthday is in a month!

MARCH 20 - 26 MAR. 27 - APR. 2

ARIES (March 21 to April 19) You’re correct to want to help someone who seems to need assistance. But be careful that they aren’t pulling the wool over those gorgeous Sheep’s eyes. You need more facts.

TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) The Bovine’s optimism will soon dispel the gloom cast by those naysayers and pessimists who still hover close by. Also, the good news you recently received is part of a fuller message that is yet to come.

GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) Feeling jealous over a colleague’s success drains the energy that you need to meet your own challenges. Wish them well and focus on what you need to do. Results start to show up in midMarch.

CANCER (June 21 to July 22) You’re likely to feel somewhat crabby these days. So, watch what you say, or you could find yourself making lots of apologies. Your mood starts to brighten by the weekend.

LEO (July 23 to August 22) Your pride might still be hurting from those unflattering remarks someone made about you. But cheer up — you’re about to prove once again why you’re the Top Cat in whatever you do.

VIRGO (August 23 to September 22) A misunderstanding with a co-worker could become a real problem unless it’s resolved soon. Allow a third party to come in and assess the situation without pressure or prejudice.

LIBRA (September 23 to October 22) Call a family meeting to discuss the care of a loved one at this difficult time. Don’t let yourself get pushed into shouldering the full burden on your own.

SCORPIO (October 23 to November 21) An upcoming decision could open up a path to an exciting venture. However, there are some risks that you should know about. Ask more questions before making a commitment.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 to December 21) Personal matters need your attention during the earlier part of the week. You can start to shift your focus to your workaday world by midweek. Friday brings news.

CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 19) You’ve been going at a hectic pace for quite a while. It’s time now for some much-needed rest and recreation to recharge those hardworking batteries.

AQUARIUS (January 20 to February 18) This is a good time to upgrade your current skills or consider getting into an entirely different training program so that you can be prepared for new career opportunities.

PISCES (February 19 to March 20) Keep a low profile in order to avoid being lured away from the job at hand. Focus on what has to be done and do it. There’ll be time later to enjoy fun with family and friends.

BORN THIS WEEK: You can be a dreamer and a realist. You dream of what you would like to do, and then you face the reality of how to do it.

ARIES (March 21 to April 19) The last lingering days of winter leave the rambunctious Ram more restless than usual. Put all of the extra energy into strengthening a long-neglected relationship.

TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) The clever Bull will ignore outward appearances and dig a little deeper to find important hidden facts before making a decision. Meanwhile, a friend needs you.

GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) It’s a good time to reorganize around your home and on the job. Missing items will seem to magically reappear once you discard the clutter.

CANCER (June 21 to July 22) Tame that skeptical nature of yours. Be open to well-intended advice from a family member. A co-worker also has a suggestion that can be beneficial to the both of you.

LEO (July 23 to August 22) A so-called bargain could turn out to be a mite more risky than you thought. Keep your purse closed for now. A better deal is just down the line.

VIRGO (August 23 to September 22) A sudden romantic overture emerges out of the past and catches you off guard. Respond with your usual honesty. This is not the time for coyness.

LIBRA (September 23 to October 22) Romantic aspects are especially favorable this week. A career move also holds positive potential. Check out possible drawbacks before making a final decision.

SCORPIO (October 23 to November 21) You dislike changing plans, but it could be a wise move to be a little more flexible than usual. The reason will become apparent very soon.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 to December 21) A loved one may feel left out of your life as you pursue your objectives this week. Take time to offer reassurances that your priorities haven’t changed.

CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 19) This is a good time to stop nursing your wounded pride and start repairing a strained friendship. Take the first step now and let the healing process begin.

AQUARIUS (January 20 to February 18) Expect good news about a particular health problem. Then go out and celebrate with friends and family. There’s good news about your financial health as well.

PISCES (February 19 to March 20) A state of confusion marks the early part of this week, but explanations will come in time to clear things up for you. Be cautious about making promises.

BORN THIS WEEK: You love being with people, whether it’s a crowd or the company of just a few friends. You have strong family loyalties and can be counted on in crisis situations.

TRIVIA TEST

SUDOKU

BY LINDA THISTLE

BY FIFI RODRIGUEZ

1. LITERATURE: What is the name of the kingdom in “The Princess Bride”?

2. GENERAL KNOWLEDGE: In British royalty, what is King Charles’ family name?

3. TELEVISION: Which TV sitcom features Sheldon’s catchphrase “Bazinga!”?

4. U.S. STATES: Which U.S. state is home to the Awatovi Ruins, a national historic landmark?

5. HISTORY: According to a WWII government slogan, what sinks ships?

6. GEOGRAPHY: What is the name of the small principality that lies between Spain and France?

7. ANATOMY: Which part of the brain controls hunger?

8. LANGUAGE: The Latin word “caput” refers to what part of the human

CROSSWORD

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SAVAGE LOVE POWER MOVES

Out of control

BY DAN SAVAGE

I have a history of dating men I’m not attracted to physically or emotionally. I always found it weirdly comforting to know my boyfriend was obsessed with me while I had minimal feelings for him. I have explored this in therapy and chalk it up to lack of selfconfidence. But a month ago I started hanging out with this guy and it’s the first relationship I’ve been that isn’t one-sided. It’s also the first relationship I’ve been in where the guy wasn’t pushing me to “define the relationship” after a month. This has led to me feeling quite vulnerable and afraid. For the first time in a long time, I’m dating a guy that I not only like but find very attractive and now I’m terrified it will end. This fear has led me to keep my feelings to myself. In previous relationships where I was the one with the upper hand, I found it easier to speak up because I felt in control and didn’t really care if it ended. I am now in a place where I’m afraid to speak for fear of saying the wrong thing. I want to know what his intentions are, but I don’t want to place undue pressure him either. I’m craving more validation than I’m getting from him because I got used to being smothered with validation in all my previous relationships, but I don’t know how to bring this up without making it seem like I am trying to DTR. Any advice?

NAKED AND AFRAID

I wouldn’t chalk up the choices you’ve made in the past — only dating men you weren’t attracted to, only dating men you could take or leave, only dating men you held in what sounds like contempt — to a lack of self-confidence. Frankly, I’m a little mystified that your therapist endorsed that interpretation. You either had one of those therapists who thinks it’s their job to help clients construct self-serving rationalizations for their shitty behavior — explanations that center their client as victims — or you came up with that rationalization on your own and your therapist never

got around to challenging you on it. So, I’m going to challenge you.

I don’t think you have self-confidence issues, NAA, I think you have control issues. You only dated men you didn’t care about — you only dated men you weren’t attracted to physically or emotionally — because you wanted to have “the upper hand.” You wanted all the power, all the leverage, and all the control. You not only dated only men you could take or leave, NAA, you seemed to go out of your way to find men who couldn’t leave you. That is not the weak-ass move of a person who lacks selfconfidence, NAA, that’s a cold-hearted power play executed by a control freak. I’m glad you got into therapy and it seems to have done you some good — you’re currently dating someone you’re attracted to and for the first time experiencing feelings most human experience when we meet someone we like — and if that shallow pseudo-epiphany you had in therapy (“I lack self-confidence!”) helped you make different and better choices, NAA, then it did you some good. But I think you have more to unpack, perhaps with a different therapist.

Zooming out for a second: Lots of us have been there. We were dating someone we could take or leave and realized that person was falling in love with us. When that happens — when someone we could take or leave is a lot more invested in the relationship and wants to have those DTR convos — we need to ends things as quickly and considerately as possible. But if we only date people we could take or leave, one after another, then we’re leading people on and, even worse, we’re stealing from them; we’re stealing time and energy they could’ve invested in finding a person who cared about them and wanted to take them. A good person doesn’t do that sort of shit — not to people they care about, not to people they don’t care about, not to anyone.

Alright, NAA, what’s going to happen with this new guy? It’s only been a month, so you don’t know him that well, and most new relationships peter out after a month or two. So, there actually isn’t that much at stake

here, at least not yet. Most of what you have is hope; you like this guy and you’re hoping you continue to like him as you get to know him better and you’re hoping he likes you too. But if it doesn’t go anywhere — if you have that DTR convo a month or two from now and you learn he’s not as into you as you are him — you may wind up with a broken heart. But getting your heart broken is proof you have one. Whatever happens, NAA, don’t return to your old, shitty, and heartless modus operandi. It wasn’t good for the men you dated, and it wasn’t good for you either. Being open to love means being open to pain. You’re open now. Stay open. It’s better this way. You’re better this way.

My boyfriend, who is a 72-year-old man, wants to gift our personal trainer, who is younger and hotter than me, an expensive piece of jewelry. I felt jealous and insecure when he brought this up and I voiced my concerns to her. She told me that she sees the gift as a token of friendship and nothing more, then added that, as her friend, I should want what’s best for her. My boyfriend is a multimillionaire many times over and maybe I don’t understand how rich people give gifts, as I’m not “from” money, but it seems strange. My boyfriend told me to think of it as a bequest — he’s making bequests in his will to 50 or so people after he dies — but the thought of him asking for her permission to give this gift to her without first asking me makes me uncomfortable. It makes me wonder how long he was fantasizing about giving her this gift and why exactly he wants to give it to her so badly. I need a second opinion here.

GIRLFRIENDLY INSTINCT FLAGGING THIS

This man is not your husband, he’s your boyfriend; his millions are not your millions, they’re his millions. I can certainly see why thinking about this gift makes you uncomfortable, GIFT, but I don’t see an upside for you in trying to talk your boyfriend out of giving his personal trainer a gift he’s already promised her. The only leverage you have over him is the threat of a breakup, GIFT, but where will issuing that threat get you? Best-case scenario: Your boyfriend rescinds the offer but resents you and your personal trainer, whom you consider a friend, feels jerked around by both of you and distances herself. Worst-case scenario: You wind up single and written out of the will — assuming you’re among the fortunate 50 or so — and your personal trainer gets that expensive piece of jewelry and possibly more.

If I may, GIFT, I’d like to address the elephant in the

room/question/gym: You’re worried your boyfriend is only making this gesture because he wants to fuck her. I can confidently assure you that your boyfriend absolutely, positively, without a doubt wants to fuck his personal trainer. Because no one in the long, sordid history of personal trainers has ever hired a personal trainer they didn’t wanna fuck. But just because someone wants to fuck their personal trainer doesn’t mean they would fuck their personal trainer. Your boyfriend can wanna fuck his personal trainer and give her a gift that essentially says, “I would if I could,” and still wanna honor the monogamous commitment he’s (presumably) made to you. While legitimately concerning, these two things — your boyfriend signaling to someone else that he would fuck them if he could and your boyfriend remaining faithful to you — are not mutually exclusive.

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PUZZLE ANSWERS

10. Tequila.

9. Red.

8. The head.

7. Hypothalamus.

6. Andorra.

5. Loose lips.

4. Arizona.

3. “The Big Bang Theory.”

2. Mountbatten-Windsor.

1. Florin.

Trivia Answers