4. A Recurring Nightmare by Annie Keough Organizations work to protect the city’s most vulnerable populations in lead-up to second Trump administration
6. Lifeline: Ten Cool Things To Do in Two Weeks
ARTS & CULTURE
7. Fact to Fiction by Pat Moran Veteran Charlotte journalist pens Tar Heel murder mystery
MUSIC
8. A Brutal Siren by Pat Moran Girl Brutal’s electronic rage attracts metalcore fans
9. Soundwave
FOOD & DRINK
10. Old Buildings, New Concepts by Ryan Pitkin
Leluia Hall carries on Tonidandel-Brown’s penchant for preservation
LIFESTYLE
12. Puzzles
12. Horoscope
14. Aerin It Out by Aerin Spruill 15. Savage Love
Thanks to our contributors: Grant Baldwin, Aerin Spruill, Dan Russell-Pinson, and Dan Savage.
A RECURRING NIGHTMARE
Organizations
ruling party, hates their existence. It’s a topic that comes up often during counseling sessions at TOY’s community center on Monroe Road.
The fear is valid, as nearly one in five hate crimes recorded since 2020 have targeted people for their sexual orientation or gender identity, according to the FBI. Anti-transgender incidents alone increased by 40% from 2021 to 2022.
emphasized to Queen City Nerve that many people including herself still have a lot of trauma associated with the first Trump administration.
“There’s a lot of fear, there’s a lot of concern on what’s to come after January 20,” Arteaga said. “And one of the things that we’ve been trying to ground folks on is that, to a degree, we already know what’s going to happen.”
administration
work to protect the city’s most vulnerable populations in lead-up to second Trump
BY ANNIE KEOUGH
Following the election of Donald Trump to the presidency for the first time in November 2016, Queen City Nerve editor-in-chief Ryan Pitkin, at the time a reporter for Creative Loafing, spoke with a number of local organizations serving vulnerable populations that found themselves the target of Trump’s most incendiary rhetoric.
The weeks leading up to Trump’s first term in office were marked by fear of the unknown — fear that proved justified in 2017 as increased ICE raids split families apart and kept the immigrant community on edge while the Trump administration rolled back Obama-era nondiscrimination protections for LGBTQ people.
The unknown now known, the sentiments and issues discussed in Pitkin’s 2016 story are back front of mind for those with the most to lose during a second Trump administration.
As Trump promises mass deportations and even stricter immigration policies during his upcoming term, which begins on Jan. 20, with a Project 2025 transition plan that proposes all new threats to LGBTQ+ rights, we spoke once again with leaders at local advocacy organizations Time Out Youth (TOY) and Carolina Migrant Network (CMN) as they prepare for President Trump 2.0.
Protecting young folks at Time Out Youth
The team at Time Out Youth (TOY), a Charlotte-based organization that provides resources and support to LGBTQ+ people aged 13-24, took a half day on Nov. 6, the day after Trump was elected to a second term, to come together and discuss their fears.
The TOY staff comprises mostly women and people of color, making them multiply impacted by the feared outcomes of a second Trump administration. Their main concern, however, lay with the youth they work with every day — specifically the transgender youth, a group that has become a favorite target of Trump and his followers.
The TOY team questioned what it will mean to be trans under this administration. If someone hasn’t had their name legally changed, will they be able to? Will those on hormones be forced off of them? Will those who have yet
to receive hormones ever be able to get them?
One question stuck with TOY’s Chief Executive Officer Sarah Mikhail. A young person asked her, “Will it be illegal to be trans?”
It was a fair question. The Trans Legislation Tracker reported 669 anti-trans bills introduced across the nation in 2024 that would affect trans people’s access to health care, education, sports, public bathrooms and their legal recognition.
Mikhail said she has two main concerns with Trump taking office again. First, there’s the effects on the courts, with more federal judges appointed by Trump and sending more cases to the Supreme Court, already stacked by Trump during his first term, setting new precedents that take more rights away from trans and queer people.
Her second concern is with the uptick in hateful rhetoric that comes from Trump’s supporters once he takes office, emboldened by his electoral victory and convinced that their exclusionary ideology has been vindicated.
While most adults remember what it was like to live under Trump’s first administration, a majority of the children that TOY serves were too young to recall the experience.
For Mikhail and her team, the threat is all too real. They are hyper-focused on protecting the youth they serve based on their knowledge of what Trump and his followers are capable of. However, in her 20 years of working with young people, Mikhail has learned that you can’t say you know something for sure if you don’t.
“As we prepared to talk to our youth, we wanted to be able to give them any certainty or assurance we had, but not make promises,” Mikhail said.
As reported by the Brookings Institution in 2019, FBI data showed that Trump’s election brought an anomalous spike in hate crimes concentrated in counties where Trump won by larger margins. It was the second-largest uptick in hate crimes in the 25 years for which data are available, second only to the spike after Sept. 11, 2001. Though hate crimes are typically most frequent in the summer, in 2016 they peaked during election season with the new, higher rate of hate crimes continuing through 2017.
Mikhail spoke on the deeply human, emotional impact it has on a community of young people to be hyperaware that a certain segment of the government, especially a
Mikhail said many of the youth her team works with are also concerned with how divestments in federal funding will affect access to gender-affirming care through Medicaid and if current protective legislation will be taken away.
Though it restricted access for people under 18 from receiving hormones or puberty blockers, NC House Bill 808 did ensure that those already accessing hormones or puberty blockers wouldn’t have them taken away.
Mikhail reminds young people that we have a Democratic governor in North Carolina that openly
Carolina Migrant Network offers pro-bono legal representation for people targeted by the Department of Homeland Security and Immigration (DHS). They plan to learn from the lessons of the first Trump administration and shape their plan accordingly for the second time around.
Under Trump 1.0, residents in east Charlotte saw more ICE activity, as that area is historically one of the larger immigrant hubs in the city, Arteaga said. Agents from the Charlotte ICE office would park outside neighborhoods, apartment complexes and trailer parks in the area
supports and protects LGBTQ+ rights. November’s election did away with the Republican Party’s supermajority, and Mikhail feels confident that any queer protections left up to the state will stay safe.
Mikhail also said TOY relies on a diverse stream of grants and philanthropy and will remain operational even if all federal funding is stripped.
In the meantime, the organization will continue to offer numerous programs and services to queer youth, including virtual name change clinics, resource days featuring hormones and blockers, hosting sexual health discussions and more.
Carolina Migrant Network wants you to know your rights
“The presidential election results reopened a deep scar many of us had yet to fully heal from,” read an email from Stephanía Arteaga, co-founder of Carolina Migrant Network (CMN), to supporters and clients on Nov. 7.
Speaking in the lead-up to Inauguration Day, Arteaga
beginning early in the morning simply to intimidate community members.
According to Arteaga, agents would detain individuals seemingly at random, oftentimes settling for “collateral,” or people who happened to be there at the wrong time and were not targets for deportation.
Episode 4 of Netflix’s six-part immigration enforcement documentary series Immigration Nation, which highlights the work of Arteaga and others around the country during the first Trump administration, depicted this intimidation tactic in play, showing officers hiding behind the CVS on Central Avenue and agents pulling over unmarked vehicles filled with work crews.
In December, following Trump’s second election victory, CMN held a Know Your Rights clinic, for which 130 people showed up to prepare for similar situations in the years to come.
“We just want to make sure that people are informed, while also ensuring that we can train people to also create networks of defense in their neighborhoods, where they can be in communication with their neighbors around
COURTESY OF CMN
CAROLINA MIGRANT NETWORK HOSTS A KNOW YOUR RIGHTS WORKSHOP IN DECEMBER.
NEWS & OPINION
what type of activity that they’re seeing,” Arteaga said. It’s not just undocumented people who have to be concerned with the effects of Trump’s second administration. As is the case with staff at Time Out Youth, Arteaga and her team know that Trump’s influence over like-minded folks also emboldens them, giving them the green light to behave in intolerable ways.
In fact, Arteaga has already seen how this plays out, as people have questioned her own sibling’s immigration status solely based on the color of his skin.
Trump’s election has left immigrants — those already in the US and those outside our borders — doubting their decision to move to or stay in the country after Jan. 20. Arteaga knows folks who are considering a move to Canada rather than face the uncertainty of the next four years.
Some people may not be leaving on their own terms, however. Trump has touted his strict immigration enforcement policies since his re-election campaign began, promising to carry out the “largest deportation effort in American history.”
CMN has had countless conversations with community members who are trying to get their affairs in order in case of deportation. For example, some are enlisting the help of her organization to establish power of attorney so that, should they be detained, their US citizen children would go to a trusted individual instead of Child Protective Services.
“You can have your country back, you can have your future back, you can have your state back,” Miller said during a Trump rally in Salem, Virginia, as reported by NPR. “You can look your children in the eye and say, ‘We did it, we saved America, we saved this republic. We didn’t let it get stolen from us.’”
The aftermath of Trump’s immigration agenda is not only completely void of any sense of humanity, Arteaga said, it’s also economically implausible.
In 2019, the New American Economy and the American
Stephen Miller, a leading player in family separation efforts as Trump’s senior advisor in his first term, will now take the role of White House deputy chief of policy during the upcoming administration while also working as the president’s homeland security advisor.
The position will grant Miller, someone who has long pushed the white supremacist Great Replacement Theory, the power to write and enact Trump’s immigration agenda.
Immigration Council reported 274,200 immigrant residents in the Charlotte metro area, with 83.4% of foreign-born workers considered to be working age. One of the top industries with the highest share of foreignborn workers is construction.
CMN reported that unauthorized immigrant workers make up nearly 65% of North Carolina farmworkers. Agricultural loss data taken from Georgia, a comparable agriculturally intensive state with a similar share of
unauthorized immigrant workers, showed that NC could lose up to $140 million in agricultural losses without immigrant workers.
The city of Charlotte owes its ability to develop and grow the local economy to immigrant workers, Arteaga emphasized.
“We can’t ignore that in certain industries, immigrant labor is needed,” Arteaga said.
The threat of mass deportation and restricting
immigration for both lawful and unlawful immigrants will negatively impact North Carolina’s economy, stripping the Charlotte area of $2.7 billion in taxes paid by immigrants and $7.4 billion in immigrants spending power that supports local businesses, according to the New American Economy.
The next four years will be emotionally and financially taxing, but Time Out Youth, Carolina Migrant Network and countless other Charlotte-based organizations will continue to work and remind folks that they still have autonomy.
“We’ve been around for … almost 35 [years], [through] different administrations, so we’re just reminding our young people that we’re here, we’re not going anywhere,” Mikhail said. “We’ll tell you what we do know, and we will be with you as we fight for the things we don’t know that are coming down the pipeline.”
Arteaga pointed out that the fear of deportation and family separation never went away, and while that risk may be increasing in the coming years, she and her team will continue to do the work they’ve always done to protect the rights of our city’s most vulnerable.
“The more folks are aware of what their rights are and the tactics that ICE has used in the past,” she said, “the more we can have an organized network of community members ready to fight back.”
Carolina Migrant Network will hold another Know Your Rights clinic on Jan. 11. Follow @carolina_migrant_network on Instagram for updates.
AKEOUGH@QCNERVE.COM
COURTESY OF TOY TIME OUT YOUTH’S COMMUNITY CENTER AT 3800 MONROE ROAD.
COURTESY OF CMN
CMN FOUNDERS BECCA O’NEILL (LEFT) AND STEFANIA ARTEAGA.
BECHTLER 15 YEAR BASH
Named after Charlotte resident and mid-century modernist art collector Andreas Bechtler, the Bechtler Museum of Modern Art opened on Jan. 2, 2010. Fifteen years later, the Uptown institution celebrates its own birthday with a DJ set by Charlotte creative Dammit Wesley and an interactive station where you can craft your own Bechtler B-day card. Guests can also explore the museum’s current exhibits — Surrealism: Then and Now, which showcases radical dreamlike works by Max Ernset, Joan Miró and others; and Clare Rojas: Past and Present, a revue of a multifaceted artist whose works veer from surrealism to abstraction.
More: Free; Jan. 8, 5 p.m.; Bechtler Museum of Modern Art, 420 S. Tryon St.; tinyurl.com/Bechtler15
‘MAESTRA’ SCREENING AND TALKBACK
This inspiring documentary follows the fortunes of women competing in an annual orchestral conducting contest in the male-dominated world of classical music. Five conductors are spotlighted, including an American balancing her professional ambitions with her desire to have a child, a Ukrainian trying to focus on her art as Russia invades her homeland, and a French immigrant returning to trauma from her past. Maestra marks the directing debut of documentary producer Maggie Contreras, who will be on hand for a Q&A following the screening.
Don’t Sweat It Inc., a nonprofit that fosters local music, presents two nights of performances at the Tom S. Gettys Center Courtroom in Rock Hill. Artists
UPCOMING EVENTS IN THE QUEEN CITY
include Charlotte alternative progressive rockers
Once Below Joy, hardscrabble South Carolina altcountry singer-songwriter Ryan Lockhart, rowdy Rock Hill rockers Space Daddy & the Galactic GoGos, percussive trap rapper/producer Yomi Blkk, Palmetto State post-rock combo Read-Only Time Travel, driving indie-pop purveyors PTSD Radio, raucous synth thrash band Complaint Club, and the list goes on. We’re not here to judge, but anyone who misses this weekend romp in the Courtroom will be found guilty.
More: $10 per night; Jan. 10 & 11, 7:30 p.m.; Tom Gettys Center Courtroom, 201 E. Main St., Rock Hill; facebook.com/dontsweatitinc
IV MONTANA W/ ZAC, ZAY GRASTLEY, HOLY BOY, TRUKK, B-VILLAINOUS
From the whirlpooling guitar that kicks off “Way With the Money” to the gravelly flow of regretlaced dis track “Windows Tinted,” Gastonia native IV Montana entwines eclectic genres in his blend of trap and R&B. On melodic tracks like “Wildfire,” North Carolina’s Zay Grastley conjoins rap and outlaw country. On cuts like “Pick a Side” and “Fuck You,” producer/rapper Trukk tackles violence and the pursuit of money. Multitudinous voices escape from the prismatic mind of B-Villainous on his creepyfunny EP Cartoon Tracks. Rapper ZAC and Christian hip-hop artist Holy Boy complete the bill.
More: $15; Jan. 11, 7 p.m.; The Rooster, 334 W. Main Ave., Gastonia; theroostergastonia.com
BREAKING BREAD
After producing and writing immersive pop-up plays in Chicago, Kellee Stall moved to the Queen City where she is a set dresser, casting director, actor, acting coach, stage director and co-founder of Charlotte Conservatory Theatre. An installation based on the theme of hope, Breaking Bread draws from true Charlotte stories of two people conversing over a meal. Several tablescapes capture the precise moments when differences are exposed mid-meal, yet the exhibit holds onto hope that we can understand those who think, believe and feel differently than ourselves. Stall will be on hand for the Jan. 12 opening to discuss her creative process with patrons.
With gritty vocals, confessional lyrics and an oldschool sense of swing, Grammy-nominated singer, songwriter and producer Syleena Johnson is a hiphop and R&B powerhouse who broke through as the inimitable voice behind the chorus of Kanye West’s 2005 hit “All Falls Down.” In 2017, Johnson collaborated with her father, R&B producer Syl Johnson, on the Rebirth of Soul LP, recorded with top-tier soul and Chicago blues artists. Her latest LP, Woman (2020), draws on spoken word and orchestral highlights to impart a message of reliance and empowerment. She’s an artist rooted in the soul tradition yet dedicated to moving it forward.
Fleeing Liberia’s seven-year civil war in the late 1990s, Janjay Lowe adopted the name of his homeland’s capital city of Monrovia as his writing/ performing moniker. Since 2020, the Chattanoogabased artist has perfected his intensely personal brand of Afro-Appalachian folk music. With hiphop accents plus a blend of acoustic and electric instruments, Lowe tackled healing and trauma on his debut LP Dark Continent. A pair of 2023 EPs, Act 1: The Wandering and Act 2: Trials, couple aspirational lyrics with lilting ukulele-driven melodies on songs like the latter’s title track “Trials,” which alludes to the Greek myth of Sisyphus.
More: $30; Jan. 17, 8 p.m.; The Underground, 820 Hamilton St.; fillmorenc.com
HOPE NICHOLS’ 65TH BIRTHDAY PARTY
Snug Harbor hosts a birthday blowout honoring the Queen City icon who founded, sang and wrote classic songs with Fetchin Bones, Sugarsmack and Snagglepuss before fronting (from behind, on the drums) her current band It’s Snakes. (She’s also co-owner with husband Aaron Pitkin of funky/chic boutique Boris & Natasha.) On the bill is rowdy, radical and tuneful guitarist/songwriter J. Roddy Walston, who draws equally from gospel and Leon Russell; San Diego-based thrash/doom metal duo Savage & the Witch; the Pylon-meets-James Brown grooves of Nichols’ own project It’s Snakes; and sounds by Shiprocked! maestro Scott Weaver.
According to Wikipedia, Kevin Hart’s first stand-up performance, which took place at The Laff House in his native Philadelphia under the name of Lil Kev, did not go well. If so, that may be the last time the four-time Emmy nominated comedian, movie star and entrepreneur has bombed. With a standup style that draws on his insecurities, Hart has lampooned himself on the faux-reality TV show Real Husbands of Hollywood while touring arenas and appearing in what feels like dozens of movies every year. Fittingly, the comedian’s Acting My Age Tour comes after he became the youngest ever recipient of the Mark Twain Prize for American Comedy in 2024 at 45 years old. At the time of this writing, the Jan. 17 and 18 shows are sold out, so act quickly to see him on his last night in the city.
What kind of future do you want? On the day a convicted felon, adjudicated rapist and avowed authoritarian takes the oath of office in Washington D.C., the Gantt Center honors two men who are the antithesis of Donald Trump and his wholly owned Republican party. The first is civil rights icon Martin Luther King, Jr., while the second is NC native Floyd McKissick, who helped create Soul City, a selfsustaining community in Warren County designed to provide equal opportunity for Black Americans in the early 1970s. This year’s MLK Day celebration honors McKissick’s visionary legacy with arts workshops, discussions, performances and more.
Veteran Charlotte journalist pens Tar Heel murder mystery
BY PAT MORAN
In Nancy Stancill’s more than 30-year career as an investigative reporter, she’s exposed wealthy men delaying divorces to punish their ex-wives, unveiled credit card companies luring consumers into crippling debt, documented shockingly high tobacco use among high school and middle school students, and profiled a strip club owner who later bribed former Charlotte mayor Patrick Cannon.
Over a decade into her second career as a crime novelist, the now-retired local journalist published her latest thriller, Deadly Secrets, on Dec. 12. The Charlottebased writer will take part in a Q&A and sign copies of her new novel, one of three featuring reporter/sleuth Annie Price, at Park Road Books on Jan. 9 at 7 p.m. The conversation will be facilitated by a colleague of Stancill’s, former Charlotte Observer reporter and Money Rock author Pam Kelley.
Stancill’s latest fictional tale is just as compelling as the stories she covered as a reporter. In Deadly Secrets, the dogged and indomitable Price solves a string of murders involving a charismatic pastor who has established a right-wing Christian state in the western North Carolina mountains.
After writing for the Houston Chronicle and other papers in Texas, Stancill worked 10 years for the Charlotte Observer before retiring in 2009. She says the Price series, which launched in 2013 with Stancill’s debut novel Saving Texas and continued with Winning Texas in 2016, is the result of the author staying in her lane.
“We write what we know, and I know newsrooms and reporters,” says Stancill, who published her memoirs, Tall: Love and Journalism in a Six-Foot World, in 2020. She adds that she’s not above embellishing the documentarystyle realism of her crime fiction with a few touches of glamour.
“I wanted a heroine who was 6 feet tall like me,” says Stancill. “But who was cuter, had better clothes, and a more exciting love life.”
The plot of Deadly Secrets is not exactly ripped from today’s headlines, but the story holds up a recognizable mirror to America’s political landscape in which religious zealots are working to steadily deconstruct the wall separating church and state.
In the novel, minister King Avery persuades state and federal authorities to establish the 51st state of Westcarolina. Avery becomes its first governor, determined to impose his evangelical beliefs on what he calls “the first Christian state.” Aided by ruthless secessionist Rob Ryland as lieutenant governor, Avery
grabs every opportunity to curtail his constituents’ civil liberties while lining his pockets.
Meanwhile, The Charlotte Press hires Texas reporter Price to expose Avery and his God’s Gift Church. This explosive situation soon becomes a backdrop to murder.
With her mystery novels, Stancill says she tries not to be too partisan with her own political views but adds that she staunchly supports the separation of church and state: “No ‘godly state’ for me.”
She notes that the novel’s first chapter describes the bombing on an abortion pill factory and that readers might infer from the sequence that she is pro-choice.
For those seeking a message, Stancill directs readers to the book’s front cover blurb from BestThrillers.com: “Crackling with immediacy and suspense, ‘Deadly Secrets’ is an unforgettable political thriller about murder, corruption and personal freedom.”
“I think this country is deeply divided,” Stancill says. “That’s probably why this novel seems believable.”
To those who know her, it’s no mystery that Stancill loves western North Carolina, where her third novel is set. She grew up in the nearby mountains of eastern Tennessee, plus some time in Virginia.
In the wake of the devastation wrought by Hurricane Helene and the long recovery process it has engendered, Stancill is devoting half her proceeds from Deadly Secrets to Asheville-based charity Hearts with Hands.
In a Dec. 24 post on NovelMasterClass.com, Stancill noted that she has a long and emotional connection to the mountains of western North Carolina, quoting a passage from her novel that describes the region and the tourists drawn to its scenery: “She knew she was looking at the Blue Ridge Mountains. Their blue haze, a reflection of the blue-green fir and balsam forests that grew there, was distinctive. Leisurely drivers flocked to the gorgeous Blue Ridge Parkway in autumn to see red, yellow and orange fall colors. In the spring and summer, tourists could look forward to the healthy foliage sprinkled with wildflowers.”
The tourists that flocked to the mountains won’t be there this winter — or possibly for a long time, Stancill writes in her post.
“Roads are badly damaged, and many restaurants and hotels won’t be open … How will the region’s fragile economy recover without tourism?” she continued.
Despite the corruption and murders that thread through her mountain mystery, Stancill says she hopes that residents of the region won’t be offended by the plot, instead seeing Deadly Secrets as a tale well told, albeit a cautionary one.
“I love that area,” she says. “I certainly don’t wish for it to have an evangelical minister at the helm.”
Highlights from a reporter’s notebook
Stancill’s approach to journalism was inspired by her late father Godfrey Wells Stancill, who worked as editor and publisher of the Radford News Journal and the Suffolk News-Herald in Virginia.
“I’ve never seen anybody work harder than he did to put out the truth in a good paper,” Stancill says.
Godfrey Stancill could do everything, she recalls — write stories and editorials, sell ads, and take pictures at children’ s ballgames.
“If somebody didn’t get their paper, he would get up from dinner and go deliver it,” Stancill says.
After graduating from the UNC Chapel Hill with a journalism degree, Nancy worked for newspapers in Texas for 15 years, much like her fictitious alter ego Annie Price. In 1993, she moved to Charlotte and started her stint at the Observer.
A 1994 story titled “Desperate Wives Settle for Less” reported on wealthy, powerful men delaying divorce settlements, in one case nine years, through unscrupulous lawyers.
“One of these poor [ex-wives] was living out of her car,” Stancill says, pointing to the results of her investigation. “Essentially, the judges were ashamed that they did not notice [the long delays, and] the legislature was appalled.”
Stancill’s reporting inspired new legislation that punished unreasonable delays while judges began sending most divorce cases to a more streamlined dispute resolution process
Another one of Stancill’s stories involved a Gastonia couple that owed more than $180,000 in credit card debt.
“The husband was making $20,000 a year and his wife was disabled,” she recalls. The couple lived on credit cards, and the credit card companies just kept signing them up for new cards.
“That was a dramatic example of how credit card companies were just savaging the consumers,” Stancill says.
The town of Robbinsville in western North Carolina came to Stancill’s attention when a survey conducted in the municipality revealed that 70 % of its high school kids smoked – and that the percentage of smoking among middle school kids was almost as high.
“It was tragic,” Stancill says. “I interviewed a 12-yearold boy that said he had been dipping snuff since he was 5 — and his parents bought it for him.”
The story took Stancill to an international smoking conference in Beijing, where the Chinese government admitted that it was selling cigarettes to children.
In retrospect, Stancill says reporters in her generation didn’t know they were living in a golden age of journalism.
“I remember 1994 and 1995 as the years of big raises,” Stancill says. “[But] you could see things slowly going downhill.”
Falling circulation was a warning bell, followed by diminishing ad sales with Craigslist beating out local classifieds for advertising dollars.
“When I came in 1993, there were 250 people in the newsroom,” Stancill says. “They created the investigative team, and they had all these bureaus.”
Now the Observer’s newsroom staff listing totals less than 50 people.
While living in London in 2010, Stancill wrote Price’s first adventure, Saving Texas. The plot was inspired by reporting Stancill did about a corrupt community college in Texas, and on the state’s longstanding secessionist movement, which also informed Price’s follow-up mystery Winning Texas
Annie gets shot at the end of the second book and is recovering as Deadly Secrets opens, and while Stancill has never found herself under literal fire for her reporting, she is certainly no stranger to second chances, as the journalist turned novelist has found a groove in the world of fiction.
Like a nighttime artillery barrage, stuttering strobe lights flash over electronic noise punk trio Girl Brutal. Clad in bunny ears, clownish Joker makeup and thong underwear over her tights, Grace Nelson stalks the stage, stomping, screaming, squatting and rolling on the floor as drummer Music Knight lays down chaotic, pummeling beats over Jarrett Mintz’s ear-splitting air-raid-siren synths.
The YouTube video of the band performing its most recent single “Poison” at The Milestone is from Girl Brutal’s Aug. 27, 2024 show, commemorating Nelson’s 24th birthday. It’s a parody of Bacchanalia, a raucous rave in hell, but Girl Brutal’s lyrics, delivered in a machine-gun staccato by founder, frontwoman and songwriter Nelson, provide a message amid the maelstrom:
“Why do I lie when you boys make me dry/ What a bore to see you talk shit … Ya milky sticky grainy brain you thinks I’m gonna sue ya/ You’re a loser poser shithead copy cat I like it too ya...”
“Poison” is a response to people in the local music scene shit-talking and wallowing in drama, Nelson says.
“I was seeing poison within the community when we’re supposed to be coming together and being reasonable adults,” she continues. “It felt like I was back in high school.”
Girl Brutal is hardcore music for people who want to let their anger out, Nelson states.
“I definitely cater … towards feminine rage,” she says. But the band does have a softer side.
In the single “Serenade,” which dropped in July, Nelson tackles her own insecurity. Here a bubbling 1980s-style synth horror soundtrack underlays Nelson’s whispered vocals, which allude to Shakespeare’s Love’s Labour’s Lost
“Put my pain on your shoulder and I expect you to let it out/ Take care of me, rid it for me/ I can’t feel it anymore and my love’s lost, hate won...”
Nelson explained to Queen City Nerve that “Serenade” is about her childhood struggles with an eating disorder.
“I wrote it [about] a relationship that I have with my body and my appearance,” she says. “But other songs are [about] calling out hypocrites and things that I see that I’m not happy with.”
The flip side of “Serenade” illustrates Girl Brutal’s take on social issues. A shouted manifesto bolstered by grinding pneumatic drill beats, “GBHC” (Girl Brutal Hates Cops) is an outraged howl in reaction to the murder of George Floyd and police brutality as a whole.
“Try to beg for my life in a fucking chokehold/ Every word that I speak doesn’t get heard...”
The trio brings its cacophonous yet alluring sonic assault to The Milestone on Jan. 10, then to The Rooster in Gastonia on Jan. 18,
Musical theatre leads to digital noise
Instead of alienating audiences with its jagged shards of noise and stark messaging, Girl Brutal has been on a roll, gaining enthusiastic fans with every show.
As Nelson’s layered and witty lyrics illustrate, the band has a playful side, bolstered by Nelson’s theatrical and sometimes satirical performance, which is where the bunny ears come in.
“I wear [the bunny ears] for their playful innocent appearance,” Nelson says. The attire ironically plays off Playboy bunnies, iconic symbols of the sexualization of women.
Onstage, Nelson supplements her assaultive approach with overblown sexy gyrations, as much a parody of femininity as Playboy publisher Hugh Hefner’s famed bunnies.
“A lot of times I do sexual movements or something a little more risqué,” Nelson offers.
It’s meant to mock what people expect of a woman performing onstage, she says, noting that she’s screaming and being creepy while she’s gyrating.
“When she’s being sexy, it’s for the girls,” says Knight, who has been dating Nelson since early 2022.
Nelson concurs. She says the faux-sexy antics are a shared secret message with women in the audience: This is the shit guys expect from us.
Much of Nelson’s captivating stage presence is instinctual, but she’s also drawing on her past as a performer and theatre kid.
“Originally, I’m a piano player. I used to do concert recitals,” Nelson says.
Attending high school in Mint Hill, Nelson became besotted with musical theatre. She cites rock opera Jesus Christ Superstar as one of her favorites at the time. She was drawn to the music’s dark and dramatic qualities, but now she considers it a guilty pleasure at best.
After graduating from high school, Nelson started attending local shows. Her explorations sparked an interest in electronic music, including the electrohardcore of Machine Girl and the experimental hip-hop of Death Grips.
“Digital noise can be whatever you make of it. You will hear the craziest tingly noises,” Nelson says. “It’s just so experimental and wide-ranging. It can’t be put into a box.”
Deciding to combine multiple eras of the things she had done, like performance art and electronics, Nelson devised the concept of Girl Brutal. She originally opted for a solo act, but when she joined the uncompromising Charlotte hardcore band Wastoid as its bassist and befriended guitarist Jarret Mintz, her plans changed.
Drawing upon their shared passion for electronic music, Nelson and Mintz launched Girl Brutal as a duo, playing the band’s first show at The Milestone on Feb. 11, 2024. By that time, Nelson was dating Knight, who has played drums for Charlotte bands True Lilith and Ink Swells. The couple also played together in nu-metal trio Cosmic Twynk.
“[I realized] I have this incredibly talented drummer that I’m dating, and I figured [he] could help elevate our sound,” Nelson says.
Knight initially had doubts about joining the combo, feeling that their sound was already full, but he recognized that Girl Brutal was sharing stages with similarly heavy acts that successfully incorporated drummers into their lineups. He joined Girl Brutal in June.
“A lot of the Girl Brutal songs have specific sounding industrial drums,” Knight says. “Sometimes I will overlay that.” But at other times, Knight says he can freestyle, completely losing the rhythm because the track already has electronic drums that anchor the song.
In a relatively short time Girl Brutal has made an impact on the local music scene. In July, the trio expanded its audience when Welcome to the Family show promoter Jake Woodard asked Girl Brutal to play a secret set at an otherwise metalcore show at The Milestone.
Knight believes Girl Brutal is inviting people to encounter a type of music they’re less familiar with, as Nelson’s “screaming vocals” and his and Mintz’s metal chops and tendencies captivated the metal-forward crowd during Welcome to the Family. Electronic music is hardly new, he acknowledges, but there is a shortage of original electronic acts in Charlotte, so Girl Brutal is in a unique position to influence the local music scene.
“I love a good guitar, bass, drums and singer band,” Knight says. “There’s nothing wrong with it. But it’s good to show people that there are alternatives and they can be local.”
Nelson says she’s flattered that, after seeing Girl Brutal play, a few fans started their own band called Yrdsale.
“I love sharing music with people and I like inspiring people,” she says. “People love a party. They’ll come [to our shows] and they’ll wear bunny ears and cool, crazy outfits. I can tell that [we are] something that’s fresh and new for the average music enjoyer.”
With people getting involved in the harrowing whirlwind of sound at the trio’s shows and finding encouragement to start their own projects, Girl Brutal’s confrontational, committed and self-reflective frontwoman is just getting started.
PMORAN@QCNERVE.COM
GRACE NELSON PERFORMS WITH GIRL BRUTAL AT THE MILESTONE.
Girl Brutal w/ Shawn Garlic, Ashley!, January Knife, Hiroshi Jaguar (The Milestone)
The Great Indoors w/ Creatures of the Sun (Petra’s)
Haymaker w/ Vehement, Alaya’s Curse, A Separate Piece (The Rooster)
Zeta w/ BloodRitual, Art Star, Masse Critique (Snug Harbor)
JAZZ/BLUES
Willie Bradley (Middle C Jazz)
COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA
Bryan Martin (Coyote Joe’s)
Griffin House (Neighborhood Theatre)
SINGER-SONGWRITER/ACOUSTIC
Jason Moss w/ Alana Gibson (VisArt Video)
CLASSICAL/INSTRUMENTAL
Charlotte Symphony: Bach & Mozart (Knight Theater)
POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
Bingo Loco (Blackbox Theater)
Gimme Gimme Disco (The Underground)
EXPERIMENTAL/MIXED-GENRE/FESTIVAL
Modal Citizan w/ IIOIOIOII, Solemn Shapes, DJ Spider (Tommy’s Pub)
COVER BANDS
The Dave Matthews Tribute Band (Amos’ Southend)
Bad Romeo w/ Ryan Trotti (Goldie’s)
Songs from the Road Band w/ Eternally Grateful (Visulite Theatre)
SATURDAY, JANUARY 11
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Karmachain w/ Grindhouse (Evening Muse)
Reviler w/ Gimmick, Alpha Strain, Jiu-Jitsu (The Milestone)
Abyssal Frost w/ Desolus, Nganga, Dr. Blood’s Orgy of Gore (Snug Harbor)
The Soundwave is Queen City Nerve’s comprehensive guide to live music happening in Charlotte every night of the week. This list is pulled together by our editorial team every other week from combing through Charlotte music venue calendars and separated by genre. None of these listings are paid advertisements. We understand that many non-traditional music venues offer live music like coffee shops, breweries, art galleries, community events and more.
This list may not have every event listed. To have a venue included in the editorial compilation of this list, please send an email to info@qcnerve.com with the subject “Soundwave.”
POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
Orbit @ Cue (Blackbox Theater)
Ultraviolet Sapphic Dance Party (Petra’s)
Requiem: Goth Night w/ DJ Velvetine, DJ Sanity Ana, DJ Vam Poison (Tommy’s Pub)
Tycho (The Underground)
SINGER-SONGWRITER/ACOUSTIC
Jake Haldenvang w/ Simple Sole Duo (Goldie’s)
Michael Tracy (Primal Brewery)
HIP-HOP/SOUL/R&B
IV Montana w/ ZAC, Zay Grastley, Holy Boy, Trukk, B-Villainous (The Rooster)
COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA
Yonder Mountain String Band (Neighborhood Theatre)
CLASSICAL/INSTRUMENTAL
Charlotte Symphony: Bach & Mozart (Knight Theater)
COVER BANDS
Dead Letter Office (R.E.M. tribute) (Amos’ Southend)
Coconut Groove Plays Steely Dan (Middle C Jazz) Runaway Gin (Phish tribute) (Visulite Theatre)
SUNDAY, JANUARY 12
CLASSICAL/INSTRUMENTAL
Charlotte Symphony: Bach & Mozart (Knight Theater) COVER BANDS
Justin Varnes: The Music of Miles Davis (Middle C Jazz)
Ashes of the Priest (Lamb of God tribute) (The Rooster)
MONDAY, JANUARY 13
JAZZ/BLUES
The Bill Hanna Legacy Jazz Session (Petra’s)
POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
See Bird Go w/ DJ Glory, De$ Dollar$, Love Ley (Snug Harbor)
OPEN MIC
Find Your Muse Open Mic feat. Big Bay Allen Blues (Evening Muse)
TUESDAY, JANUARY 14
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Red Rocking Chair (Comet Grill)
POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
Dark ‘n’ Dirty (Snug Harbor)
OPEN MIC
Open Mic Night feat. The Smokin J’s (Smokey Joe’s Cafe & Bar)
WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 15
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Under High Street w/ Groove Skeletons, Jackson Fig (Snug Harbor)
Self Made Monsters w/ Girl Brutal, Cyanide Suspension, Marianne Toilet & the Runs, Punk Angels (The Rooster)
It’s Snakes w/ J. Roddy Walston, Savage & The Witch, DJ Scott Weaver (Snug Harbor)
POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
Digital Noir w/ DJ Spider, Dead Cool (The Milestone) Hot & Fresh with J. Overcash and Friends (Salud Cerveceria)
FUNK/JAM BANDS
Joe May’s Month of Mondays (Visulite Theatre)
CLASSICAL/INSTRUMENTAL
Charlotte Symphony: Gershwin’s Magic Key (Knight Theater)
Charlotte Symphony: Disco Fever (Knight Theater) COVER BANDS
The Breakfast Club (Amos’ Southend)
Minutes & Years w/ Bald Brothers (Goldie’s) Jay D. Jones: Musical Salute to The Isleys (Middle C Jazz)
SUNDAY, JANUARY 19
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Silverstein (The Fillmore)
JAZZ/BLUES
Omari & the Hellhounds (Comet Grill)
Russell Thompkins & the New Stylistics w/ Blue Notes (Knight Theater)
Karen Linette (Middle C Jazz)
POP/DANCE/ELECTRONIC/DJ
Hazy Sunday (Petra’s)
Soul Sundays feat. Guy Nowchild (Starlight on 22nd)
MONDAY, JANUARY 20
JAZZ/BLUES
The Bill Hanna Legacy Jazz Session (Petra’s)
OPEN MIC
Find Your Muse Open Mic (Evening Muse)
TUESDAY, JANUARY 21
ROCK/PUNK/METAL
Red Rocking Chair (Comet Grill)
Miranda & the Beat w/ Comino, Designer (Snug Harbor)
HIP-HOP/SOUL/R&B
Nocap (The Fillmore)
OPEN MIC
Open Mic Night feat. The Smokin J’s (Smokey Joe’s Cafe & Bar)
VISIT
QCNERVE.COM FOR THE FULL SOUNDWAVE LISTING
OLD BUILDINGS, NEW CONCEPTS
Leluia Hall carries on Tonidandel-Brown’s penchant for preservation
BY RYAN PITKIN
Walking through the 110-year-old Dilworth church that will soon be home to Leluia Hall early one January morning, I got the sense that Jamie Brown could see things that I couldn’t.
Where I saw ladders, buckets, tool boxes, bags of quick-set compound, bottles of caulk, extension cords and a slew of supplies strewn about an unfinished bar area, she saw a dining room complete with tables, seats, server stations, stools at the finished raw bar, and silverware settings.
At least that’s what I imagined she saw.
“I think in any of these restoration projects, it’s a game of faith,” she said. “You’ve got to just keep moving forward. It does not always look pretty. This is one of those moments. It’s the chaos that happens right before you go to open.”
This process is nothing new to Brown, who cofounded Tonidandel-Brown restaurant group with her husband Jeff Tonidandel in 2009 with the opening of NoDa’s Crepe Cellar. They landed in that prime location by happenstance after searching for any space a property owner was willing to lease two aspiring restaurateurs with no experience in the midst of the Great Recession.
And yet, as the pair of Davidson College graduates have continued to grow their company, opening more establishments along the North Davidson Street corridor — Growler’s Pourhouse, Haberdish, Ever Andalo, Reigning Doughnuts — before expanding to Plaza Midwood with the opening of Supperland, one thing has remained constant: each of their restaurants are located in old and sometimes historic buildings.
The two insist that preservation was never part of their mission when they launched Tonidandel-Brown, though it does play into their goals involving community.
“We are interested in the neighborhoods and having a presence in the neighborhood that we’re going into,” Tonidandel explained. “I think that leads us into some of these old buildings. We really want to be part of the neighborhood. It makes a little more sense to go into some building that’s been here for 100 years rather than jumping into a new build where you don’t quite feel like you’re really part of the neighborhood.”
“I think we’ve gravitated towards interesting spaces
that are kind of like a very natural bedrock on which to build,” added Brown. “It’s not just this white room. It already has character, so it actually makes our jobs a lot easier. We always joke like, ‘We probably aren’t very good
at the latest, Tonidandel and Brown look to continue building their legacy as two of Charlotte’s most impactful restaurateurs, not only for their great food and dining experiences but for the legacy they are building — if accidentally — as two of Charlotte’s most important preservationists.
The big move
“Somehow it is 2023 and I find myself here as a restaurateur in front of city council fighting to save a 1903 building,” said Jamie Brown during a Sept. 18, 2023, Charlotte City Council meeting, clearly somewhat frustrated. “That’s not where I expected to be.”
Brown was there to gain support for a rezoning hearing at the Leleuia Hall site, located at 1823 Cleveland Avenue. While the historic church on the site was already zoned for th use they needed — renowned restaurant Bonterra operated there for more than 20 years before moving in 2021 — Tonidandel-Brown wanted to take things further.
“Dilworth was meant to be developed around mass transit and walking people. It is really not set up for the type of single-occupancy-vehicle traffic that most of its residents participate in today,” said then-Mayor Pro Tem Braxton Winston.
“We should ask ourselves which history we are trying to preserve,” he continued. “Are we trying to actually preserve the makeup of the neighborhood or do we want to preserve a gentrified version of the neighborhood, which exists today?”
The process was about more than business for Brown and Tonidandel, who are Dilworth residents raising their children in a home just a few blocks away from the Cleveland Avenue site.
“There were definitely frustrations or concerns around how are we really trying to grow in Charlotte?” said Brown. “But also, I live in this neighborhood and I’ve got children. I know what it’s like not to want change. A lot of people don’t want change. You’re happy where you are. So I can understand why people can feel upset or worried. That’s the last thing we want to do is create change for
at what we do. It’s just the old space that offers that up already.’”
Safe to say that both Brown and Tonidandel are good at what they do, as they’ve proven time and again with their popular eateries. It appears that with each new establishment, the team grows stronger.
Building on the strong buzz behind Haberdish, the Southern-styled restaurant that opened in late 2016, the team’s 2021 opening of Supperland gained national recognition. The Plaza Midwood steakhouse, also located in a historic church, landed at No. 15 on Esquire’s list of Best New Restaurants in 2022.
Now with Leluia Hall, a steak-and-seafood restaurant set to open sometime in January or by winter’s end
Their plan was to move the Leeper & Wyatt building, Dilworth’s oldest surviving retail building that had been slated for demolition, from where it sat on South Boulevard to the lot on the church’s property on Cleveland Avenue.
The plan saw pushback from a handful of neighbors who were concerned that placing the building in what was supposed to be Leluia Hall’s parking lot would only exacerbate issues with parking in the neighborhood, adding more traffic while taking away parking spots.
The September hearing inspired a debate among council members about what it looked like to “preserve the character” of a neighborhood dubbed Charlotte’s oldest streetcar suburb.
the worse. We want it to be a beautiful place for people to enjoy.”
The rezoning petition was eventually approved and the couple moved forward with relocating the Leeper & Wyatt building, a process that proved far more complex than any restoration they had carried out at their other establishments. There were dozens of considerations to be made before the big move could take place, from city permitting to ensuring the streets could hold the weight of the building to raising power lines and trimming tree branches to working the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Historic Landmarks Commission.
“Jeff did all the legwork on that move,” Brown acknowledged. “The number of parties that had to come out here. There were days we’d have a meeting
LELUIA HALL WILL OPEN SOON AT 1823 CLEVELAND AVENUE.
PHOTO BY GRANT BALDWIN
FOOD & DRINK FEATURE Adapt and reuse
and there’d be 25 people out here just talking, all from different teams.”
In September 2024, a crowd of Dilworth and South End residents gathered to watch workers move the 120-yearold building 750 feet down the street from 1923 South Blvd. to 1823 Cleveland Ave.
Brown said she has kept in contact with some of her neighbors who had opposed the move in an effort to reconcile any differences the two parties may have had.
“I think some of the ones that weren’t in support of it are now seeing the vision,” Brown said. “They’re okay with it and excited for us to open and have been very accepting. I think we’re turning the corner. We’ll be excited to have all of them here, even if they were the people that stood up in front of the city council and spoke out against this project here. It’s okay. It’s all good.”
Tonidandel and Brown still haven’t finalized plans for
With each of Tonidandel-Brown’s establishments carrying a slightly different variation of the family-style, shared-dining experience that runs through all of the restaurants — Southern fried chicken at Haberdish, Italian at Ever Andalo, steaks at Supperland — Leluia Hall marks the company’s first foray into seafood.
While Growlers Pourhouse offers up an enticing oyster program, Tonidandel, Brown and executive chef Chris Rujinski, who’s moving over from Supperland, are expanding on that for Leluia Hall’s raw bar, offering oysters and a range of ceviche options.
According to Tonidandel, citrus will be the root from which the raw bar’s menu items branch out.
“We have this huge knowledge base of things that we can do culinarily with citrus,” he said. “Right now we have the ability to take the acid content, take the sugar content of all the different stuff that goes into the cocktails, and we’re doing that for our ceviche as well to keep the consistency going.”
the Leeper & Wyatt building, all they know is that it will be another restaurant separate from Leluia Hall with a glassed-in solarium on the rooftop patio.
With 1,500 square feet on each of the building’s three floors, Brown said her next job will be to find out how to best activate that limited space on each story.
Design is Brown’s strength, as Haberdish was recognized twice in 2017 by the American Institute of Architects, earning the AIA NC Award and AIA Charlotte Honor Award for its design and atmosphere.
She’s likely to find plenty to do with the historic building that now sits next door to Leluia Hall, but for now the focus is on getting their first Dilworth restaurant opened.
That includes taking some “tricks” that have worked wonders in their other establishments’ bar programs such as acidifying pineapple juice until it more resembles lime juice, then using that in the ceviche. They’ll also be working yuzu and other lesser known citrus fruits into some recipes.
Brown said each new concept for the company can often be tied to where the couple are in their own lives together. Ever Andalo was born of Jeff’s efforts to get more connected with his Italian roots, bringing the family there and even obtaining Italian citizenship.
Supperland was inspired by Brown’s experience with late-onset food insensitivities, which found her patronizing more steakhouses because they had menus she could work with more easily.
As for the menu at Leluia Hall, it will more closely resemble what Brown and Tonidandel like to cook at home.
“There are a lot of things at home that we do that are maybe a little bit more unusual than the way the standard American diet is,” she said. “We use a lot of coconut milk and cream at home. We use a ton of avocado and more meat and vegetable or seafood and vegetable type of approach, so that’s definitely influenced what we’re doing here.”
The restaurant will offer three seating options, with the main dining room on the ground floor, partially private dining on the upper mezzanine, and a private dining table in the basement, where diners will be surrounded by 1,200 bottles of 200 different varieties of wine, all temperature controlled.
With the name paying homage to the roots of the building — Leluia Hall is a mash-up of the word
“Hallelujah” — the two hope to foster an environment that feels celebratory. They’ve worked toward that goal with every little touch from the stair risers to the overhead lighting.
“Yes, people are coming to eat, but they’re also coming to experience and spend their time and enjoy their time,” Brown said. “This being an old church, we just go to that. We just want this whole place to feel like a celebratory place and really fun.”
When they do open their doors, that will surely be the case, because regardless of their running joke, these two are good at what they do.
RPITKIN@QCNERVE.COM
JEFF TONIDANDEL (LEFT) AND JAMIE BROWN INSIDE LELUIA HALL.
PHOTO BY GRANT BALDWIN
INSIDE LELUIA HALL AS A RENOVATION PROJECT.
PHOTO BY GRANT BALDWIN
THE SOON-TO-BE-BAR AT LELUIA HALL.
PHOTO BY GRANT BALDWIN
HOROSCOPE
JAN.
8 - JAN. 14 JAN. 15 - JAN. 21
ARIES (March 21 to April 19) The New Year brings challenges that can change many things in your life. You need to be prepared not only to confront them but also to deal with what happens afterward.
TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) You have what it takes to set your goals quite a bit higher this year. Learn what you need to know and put what you learn into your efforts. A partner offers loving support.
GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) In true Gemini Twin fashion, you’re conflicted about a decision you know you’ll have to make in this New Year. Best advice: Get the facts before you make any commitment.
CANCER (June 21 to July 22) A friend offers you an exciting opportunity for this New Year. Although your positive aspects are strong in most respects, caution is advised. Investigate before you invest.
LEO (July 23 to August 22) You can make this New Year a roaring success! Start by readjusting your goals to reflect the changes in the economy. Your den-mate offers both wise and loving support.
VIRGO (August 23 to September 22) The New Year brings new opportunities for change. But you need to be ready to move away from the comfortable status quo to the challenging unknown. It’s up to you!
LIBRA (September 23 to October 22) Your most important New Year’s resolution should be to work out problems with a family member in order to avoid continuing misunderstandings. Do it soon for both of your sakes.
SCORPIO (October 23 to November 21) The New Year has much to offer the intensely determined Scorpian, who isn’t afraid to take on challenges and stay with them until they surrender their rewards.
SAGITTARIUS (November 22 to December 21) You’ll have many fine opportunities in this New Year. But be warned: Reject offers of “help.” You work best when you’re free to be your own creative self.
CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 19) The New Year offers changes that you might feel you’re not quite ready for. Best advice: Deal with them one step at a time until you’ve built up your self-confidence.
AQUARIUS (January 20 to February 18) Travel is a dominant aspect of the New Year. This could mean relocating to another city (or even another country) in connection with your education or career.
PISCES (February 19 to March 20) This New Year brings news about a change you’ve been anticipating. You might have a problem persuading a loved one about your new plans, but they will soon go along with your ideas.
BORN THIS WEEK: You have a gift for making people feel safe and protected. You would make an excellent youth counselor.
ARIES (March 21 to April 19) It’s a good time to take a much-needed break from your recent hectic schedule and spend some time in quieter surroundings. Important news could arrive early next week.
TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) The Taurean traits of reliability and thoroughness could be well-tested when decision-makers consider your proposals and/or requests. Be prepared to answer some probing questions.
GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) A sudden attack of boredom leaves you with some tasks undone. It’s OK to take a short respite, but get back to work by week’s end so that you have time for other projects.
CANCER (June 21 to July 22) Avoid prejudging a situation just because it looks bad. Facts could emerge that can make your position uncomfortable, to say the least. Meanwhile, a relative has interesting news to share with you.
LEO (July 23 to August 22) This is a good time to begin reassessing some of your recent decisions about your long-range goals to see if they still have merit. In addition, spend more time with loved ones this weekend.
VIRGO (August 23 to September 22) An unsettled situation at home or on the job early in the week could drain your energy levels, making it difficult to get your work done on schedule. But things improve by midweek.
LIBRA (September 23 to October 22) A temporary setback could give you time to go over your plans to find weaknesses that you might have overlooked before. Also, a romantic getaway with a special person is favored this weekend.
SCORPIO (October 23 to November 21) Professional and personal situations benefit you once you set a positive tone in getting things off to a good start. Honest dialogue smooths over any occasional display of balkiness.
SAGITTARIUS (November 22 to December 21) A problem with workplace colleagues or family members seems to defy even your sage counsel. But be patient. Your words will eventually lead to a resolution.
CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 19) Don’t just wait out an unexpected and unexplained delay in your career move. You could gain added respect if you ask why it happened and what you can do to move things along.
AQUARIUS (January 20 to February 18) Although your workplace strategies are usually accepted, you could be challenged by someone who isn’t so favorably impressed. Be prepared to defend your positions.
PISCES (February 19 to March 20) Your friendship circle expands with new people coming into your life at this time. Welcome them warmly, but don’t neglect cherished longtime personal relationships.
BORN THIS WEEK: You love to search for knowledge and share it with others. You would make an especially fine teacher!
LIFESTYLE PUZZLES
SUDOKU
BY LINDA THISTLE
TRIVIA TEST
BY FIFI RODRIGUEZ
1. TELEVISION: Which popular spinoff series originated with the drama “Breaking Bad”?
2. HOLIDAYS: What is another name for Three Kings Day, celebrated on Jan. 6?
3. LANGUAGE: What does the Latin phrase “bona fide” mean?
4. MOVIES: In the movie “Babe,” what kind of animal is the title character?
5. MEASUREMENTS: How many grams are in a kilogram?
6. GEOGRAPHY: Which strait separates Saudi Arabia from Africa?
7. SCIENCE: What are the three layers that make up the Earth?
8. FOOD & DRINK: Which breakfast food is associated with the retro series “Stranger Things”?
9. MEDICAL: What is the common name for muscae volitantes?
CROSSWORD
PLACE A NUMBER IN THE EMPTY BOXES IN SUCH A WAY THAT EACH ROW ACROSS, EACH COLUMN DOWN AND EACH SMALL 9-BOX SQUARE CONTAINS ALL OF THE NUMBERS ONE TO NINE.
10. LITERATURE: Which poet wrote a six-volume biography of President Abraham Lincoln?
Exploring NA options about town on the first weekend of the new year
BY AERIN SPRUILL
The moment Jeremy Radio slid the non-alcoholic version of the Astro Zombie (just $10 with the booze) across the bar in a very on-brand enamel sharkhead mug, I knew Uncle Jerry’s Tiki Sundays at Tommy’s Pub was the ideal kickoff for our dry-ish Sunday Funday.
The first sip only confirmed that kismet.
The refreshing flavors of grapefruit and lime hit my lips first, but it was the tingly combo of cinnamon syrup and seltzer bubbles that delivered a warm, fuzzy mouth feel that convinced me Uncle J must’ve forgotten to exclude the dark rum and pernod. It was the first time I could imagine day drinking without actually drinking.
“I think I actually prefer yours,” Boo admitted, taking a second sip of his traditional Dark and Stormy ($8). I didn’t believe him at first, but before I knew it, he was reaching for another sip of Baby Shark. Hmmm, maybe we are capable of dry-ish January after all.
Every December, I flirt with the idea of jumping on the Dry January bandwagon. But before the figurative resolution pen even touches mental paper — or dares escape my lips for anyone to hold me to it — New Year’s Eve rolls around.
The thought of facing Charlotte’s nightlife — or any social situation, really — sober, while still in the malaise of New Year’s Day’s poor decisions, convinces me I’m mentally unprepared to follow Gen Z down the mindfuldrinking path.
That’s right, millennials: Surviving Y2K, two economic crises, and drowning our unpacked childhood trauma has paved the way for Gen Z to set healthy boundaries with alcohol.
But in all seriousness, research has shown that, for reasons that are tough to pinpoint, Gen Z seems less inclined to follow J-Kwon’s OG mantra: “Everybody in the club gettin’ tipsy.”
And that simple first sip at Tommy’s piqued my sober curiosity a week into the new year, as the warmth of the tiki mocktail lingered in my mouth and we headed over to NoDa on the hunt for NA options that could keep the party going.
You might know Haberdish for their fried chicken, but it was their surprisingly delicious punch bowls that made a lasting impression on my once-naive taste buds, back in 2016 when I was still hooked on vodka Red Bulls.
So it only made sense to stop in and try their spirit-free
and legally “green” cocktails (because who says you can’t be “high” on life and still stay sober-ish?).
Snoop Nogg ($15) featuring the hemp-infused NA spirit Calmezzi, was sold out so I went with the New Best Friend ($14) featuring Calmezzi original, amethyst lemon serrano NA spirit, lime simple syrup and soda. Boo opted for the CBD-infused California Sober ($11).
Though I’m usually not one to pine for a spritzer, my New Best Friend was bubbly, light, and showed off just the right amount of balanced flavor to set her far above her Aperol spritz, White Claw, or seltzer water counterparts in my rotation.
But don’t let her free-spirited, carefree nature fool you, her Calmezzi fey is fierce.
“Do you feel anything?” Boo asked as I realized the day had turned to night and I was only a third of the way through my cocktail. I chuckled with quiet confidence
that I was feeling no more than a placebo buzz while simultaneously searching “NA mocktail recipes, boozefree activities, bottle shops near me with NA spirits, and what happened to Charlotte’s Counterculture Club?”
Then, suddenly, I was hungry.
“I don’t think so, but should we close out and head over to Copperhead to place a to-go order and a nightcap?”
“…or Zambies,” Boo said.
“Or what if we go to Copperhead, place a to-go order, have a beer while we play Simpson’s bowling, then place a pick-up order at Zambie’s for late-night?” I replied with a huge grin and raised eyebrows.
When he smiled and didn’t immediately veto, I knew that Haberdish had delivered on sending us home in high spirits without the buzz and our only regret would be that we’d forgotten to stock up on Pepto.
A couple blocks closer to Uptown, across the street from the Heist Brewery corner, Copperhead Social Club sat waiting for us to warm up one more time before making our way back home.
In the middle of what was supposed to be a quick catch-up with a girlfriend, quietly savoring her Best Day Brewing Kölsch-style NA beer, I realized my New Best Friend was charming her way into my psyche like a mischievous sprite.
Before I knew it, I was doing the one thing I can’t stand for other people to do: overstaying my welcome.
My time-turner on dry-ish Sunday funday was running out and I needed two Copperhead burgers and one order of Copperhead-style fries to go stat … the ‘za would have to wait.
INFO@QCNERVE.COM
PHOTO BY AERIN SPRUILL
SAVAGE LOVE QUICKIES
No mo’ pronouns needed
BY DAN SAVAGE
Would you be willing to share my list of proposed gender-free pronouns with your readers, listeners and followers? I’ve enclosed a graph listing them that details how they should be used. They are very liberating.
Sorry, but I’m unwilling to share your list of new pronouns with my readers, listeners and followers as there are currently more than enough gendered pronouns, non-gendered pronouns, and neo-pronouns in circulation. I don’t see any point in adding more to the mx.
Should I get on Grindr?
“Every gay man should know how to use Grindr but we all need to remember that it’s just like any social media app: useful, addictive, toxic and it should never, ever replace real-life interactions,” said queer author and filmmaker Leo Herrera. “The apps are simply one tool in a huge sex arsenal that we’ve developed for hundreds of years. And right now, gay men of all ages are walking away from the apps and embracing tradition: picking up strangers in bars and bathhouses and parks. So, before you download Grindr, learn the basics of analog cruising — traditional cruising — so you’re not dependent on Grindr.”
Leo Herrera is the author of the book Analog Cruising, a great resource for younger gay men who never learned how to pick someone up in person and older gay men who forgot how after the apps came along. Follow on Instagram and Threads @herreraimages.
How can I meet you, Dan?
You can meet me in person — in the flesh — when I host the Part One premiere of the HUMP! 2025 Film Festival in Seattle on Feb. 14-15. I’ll also be hosting screenings in San Francisco from Feb. 20-22 and Berlin on April 22-23. To find out more about the amazing films in HUMP!’s 20th anniversary season — and to get tickets to see HUMP! in a theater near you — go to humpfilmfest. com.
How do you get over the proverbial one who got away?
You know what they say: “The fastest way to get over someone is to get under someone new.” And it turns out they — the proverbial they — were on to something. In a 2023 piece for The Atlantic defending rebound
relationships, Faith Hill cited research done by Amy Hackney, a psychology professor at Georgia Southern University, which found that the sooner heartbroken people started dating— the sooner they got under someone new — the faster they healed from their heartbreak. So, if you haven’t already gotten under someone new, go throw yourself under someone ASAP!
Would you please talk about the movie Babygirl, Dan!
Writer Rebecca Woolf will be joining me on the Lovecast to talk about Babygirl, the new film starring Nicole Kidman as a powerful corporate executive who gets into a D/s relationship with a hot male subordinate. Woolf wrote a (spoiler-packed) essay about the film on her website that I can’t wait to discuss with her on my show!
What’s the best way to describe DP?
Two men enter, one man cleaves.
I fell in love with an unhappily married man in an open relationship. He ultimately decided to divorce his wife to be with me. When he told her he wanted a divorce, she told him she was three months pregnant. They had an agreement to not have kids for the time being, given their issues. Now he says he feels stuck. This was messy before the pregnancy and it’s extra messy now. It’s hard because I’ve never loved someone so much and he says the same about me. I can’t imagine moving on from him. He won’t consider getting a divorce and co-parenting with her and I’m not sure why. What should I do?
You have two (legal) options: You can wait for this man to divorce his wife — a wait that will probably never end — or you can get under someone new.
It seems reasonable to ask (given who’s returning to the White House) that you revive your ITMFA campaign? My ITMFA buttons and t-shirts are a little tattered and I could use a fresh stash for handing out. Please?
I raised hundreds of thousands of dollars for the ACLU, Planned Parenthood, and the International Refugee Assistance Project selling ITMFA (“Impeach the Motherfucker Already”) buttons, t-shirts, lapel pins and
mugs after that man entered the White House in 2017. I believed at the time that impeaching him might save the country. But seeing as that motherfucker was impeached twice — and indicted dozens of times — and it didn’t make a damn bit of difference, I don’t think calling on him to be impeached a third time is going to help. We’re going to need new strategies, new candidates and new merch.
Is there anyone in the Montreal area who can safely inject saline into a man’s scrotum?
Scrotal inflation is a niche kink — not many people are into it — but Quebec wouldn’t be Canada’s kinkiest province if it weren’t for the critical mass of kinksters who call Montreal home. So, I’m guessing there’s probably at least one pervert in Montreal who can safely blow your sack up to the size of a basketball. But that particular pervert isn’t in my list of contacts, which means you’ll have to find them yourself.
When my girlfriend eats my pussy, there’s no problem! When my husband eats my pussy, I invariably get a yeast infection. It’s actually starting to piss him off. Help!
Wait, your husband is giving you yeast infections — or his epidermal microbiome is — and he’s pissed off? Aren’t you the wronged party here? Maybe a dermatologist could help and/or maybe your husband could go down on your girlfriend a few times in the hopes that her epidermal microbiome re-seeds his. But if your husband can’t go down on you without giving you a yeast infection, then he doesn’t get to go down on you. I had a serious boyfriend who was allergic to my semen (that’s a thing) but loved facials. I couldn’t come on his face, but other guys could. And did I whine about it? Did I get pissed off? No and no. I arranged for other guys to come on his face right after I came on theirs.
May I ask a personal question? What is your relationship like with your husband’s boyfriend? I can only imagine that it must be complicated. My relationship with my husband’s boyfriend is a lot less complicated than my relationship with my husband.
Could you please recommend a lube that doesn’t irritate vulvas/vaginas?
Some women swear by water-based lubricants, others swear by silicone-based lubricants. Water-based lubes can get tacky and need to be reapplied but are easily washed off; silicone-based lubes stay slick a lot longer and require fewer reapplications but they’re harder to wash off. Individual results/preferences vary.
Me and my new partner — great sex begins at 49 (and after divorce!) — do a lot of pretend breast feeding, which is intimate, erotic, matronly, and so sexy for both of us. But the guilt after sucks. How do I not feel guilty about this?
As perversions go, your kink barely registers as a kink. I mean, who doesn’t enjoy sucking on their partner’s nipples? Most of us aren’t consciously invoking (or acting
out) pretend breast-feeding sessions, but on some level we’re latching onto distant sense/sensual memories. And even if this is weird, which it isn’t, who cares? You enjoy it, she enjoys it, it gets you both off, and you’re not forcing anyone to watch or participate who doesn’t want to watch or participate. And if it makes you feel better, there are far worse kinks out there. Enjoy your partner’s tits and thank your lucky stars you’re not into coprophilia or crypto.
What cautions should I take as a gay Dom to prevent consensual kink and pain play from being misconstrued later as abuse or assault? One of my subs wants to be slapped, trampled and fat shamed. Do I need some sort of contract?
“Communication is the best caution we Doms can take,” said The Funny Dom, a kink educator, author, and content creator who lives and dominates subs in Australia. “Things can’t be misconstrued if they’ve been plainly and specifically discussed and planned — and safewords agreed to — before they’re carried out. But absolutely he could look at drawing up a ‘contract’ that they both read and sign as a way of really formalizing consent and making sure they’re literally on the same page.”
The Funny Dom and I both wanted to emphasize that slave contracts or play contracts aren’t legally binding — because of course they’re not — and your sub is free to withdraw his consent at any moment. If you keep going after he uses his safeword or tells you to stop, you will have crossed the line that separates kink play from abuse and assault.
Follow The Funny Dom on Instagram and Threads @ TheFunnyDomReturns. The third installment of The Funny Dom’s Guide to Kink is out now!
How many times have you seen Wicked?
Just once — but I plan to see it again, the same day that Wicked: Part Two is released, because I’m only getting gayer.
When and how do I bring up when a stranger smells bad when meeting for a hookup?
Before you ask them to shower — assuming you want them to stay — or after you tell them to leave if they ask for a reason and you feel safe sharing the real reason.
Is using a dating app cheating?
A single person wouldn’t be asking me this question — for obvious reasons (no one to cheat on) — which means you’re not single. And if your partner was a stag or a cuck or your relationship was open and you were allowed to be on the apps, you wouldn’t be asking me this question. So, in your case, using a dating app is definitely cheating.
Got problems? Yes, you do! Email your question for the column to mailbox@savage.love; or record your question for the Savage Lovecast at savage.love/askdan; podcasts, columns and more at Savage.Love.
7, 2024
THANK YOU TO THE HUNDREDS OF PEOPLE THAT BRAVED THE COLD TO CLOSE OUT 2024 WITH US! CATCH IT AGAIN NEXT YEAR.
