Queen City Nerve Issue 6_2019

FEBRUARY 13 - FEBRUARY 26, 2019 - QCNERVE.COM

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Charlotte’s Cultural Pulse

NEWS & CULTURE STAFF

PUBLISHER • Justin LaFrancois jlafrancois@qcnerve.com EDITOR-IN-Chief • Ryan Pitkin rpitkin@qcnerve.com

EDITORIAL

ASSOCIATE EDITOR • Courtney Mihocik cmihocik@qcnerve.com STAFF WRITER • Pat Moran pmoran@qcnerve.com

ART/DESIGN

ART DIRECTOR • Dana Vindigni dvindigni@qcnerve.com

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MARKETING MANAGER • Jayme Johnson jjohnson@qcnerve.com Queen City Nerve welcomes submissions of all kinds. Please send submissions or story pitches to rpitkin@qcnerve.com.

Queen City Nerve is published every other Wednesday by Nerve Media Productions LLC. No portion may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher.

Queen City Nerve is located in Advent Coworking at 933 Louise Ave., Charlotte, NC, 28204.

First Issue of Queen CIty Nerve free. Each additional issue $5.

6 Confronting the New Normal Community reacts to statewide ICE crackdown by Ryan Pitkin 4 Editor’s Note by Ryan Pitkin 5 The Scanner by Ryan Pitkin

SPORTS & FITNESS 10 Get Fit with Britt by Brittany Pereda 11 The Seeker by Katie Grant 12 NBA All-Star Guide 2019

ARTS

14 Ten Nights in Rio Local Carnival celebration rings in a decade by Courtney Mihocik

LIFELINE

16 How not to kill your social life

MUSIC

18 A New Wave for the Old School Player Made puts on for All-Star Weekend by Ryan Pitkin 20 Soundwave

FOOD & DRINK

22 Jobs Not Walls Charlotte company goes to the roots of the Honduran exodus by Pat Moran 24 The Buzz

Cover Design by Dana Vindigni

NIGHTLIFE

26 Tips From Last Night by Justin Zalewski 26 Sudoku 27 Crossword 28 Horoscope 30 Savage Love

Photo courtesy of NBA/Charlotte Hornets FEBRUARY 13 - FEBRUARY 26, 2019 - QCNERVE.COM

EDITOR’S NOTE WE DON’T REALLY type of PR disaster that convinced even some DESERVE THE conservatives to rethink HB2 and find a “compromise” that would bring an end to the ill-advised law.

ALL-STAR GAME And that’s what we got, at least according to the A reminder that HB2 never really died

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BY RYAN PITKIN

IT’S BEEN A wild ride, but All-Star Weekend is finally here. Let’s be honest, though: Charlotte does not deserve it.

In February 2016, Charlotte City Council passed a nondiscrimination ordinance that prohibited local businesses from discriminating against gay, lesbian or transgender people. Simple enough, right? Let’s all go about our business in a more inclusive city, right?

Not so fast. For every action, there is a reaction, and in North Carolina that usually means conservatives belligerently overreacting to a progressive decision by using fearmongering to stir their base into a frenzy.

In this case, they focused on the idea that transgender people would be allowed to use bathrooms based on the gender that they identify as (gasp!), claiming that this would lead to all sorts of debauchery and predatory behavior, despite all recorded evidence to the contrary. And that’s how we got the shitshow that was HB2.

Rather than focus on things that actually matter, North Carolina’s Republican lawmakers convened a special session on March 23, 2016, to pass the Public Facilities Privacy and Security Act, making it retroactively illegal for municipalities to expand upon existing nondiscrimination ordinances to make them more inclusive.

And thereafter followed a disaster the likes of which North Carolina has never seen before.

OK, I’m being a little over dramatic with that statement, but anyone who lived in Charlotte during 2016 can tell you that HB2 was a cloud that hung over the state for far too long.

Among the reactions to HB2 was NBA commissioner Adam Silver’s announcement that he would take the NBA All-Star Game away from Charlotte, as it was originally planned to be held in the Queen City in 2017 for the first time in 26 years.

This, perhaps more than anything, was the

headlines. On March 30, 2017, a full year and a week after the passage of HB2, the loathsome bill was finally repealed in a “compromise” that was widely heralded as an end to the madness.

But was it, though?

The repeal of HB2 was no compromise at all.

The new law was more a repeal of Charlotte’s nondiscrimination ordinance amendment than a repeal of HB2, and also prohibited towns and cities in the state from passing any such laws protecting LGBTQ people for the near future.

Silver acknowledged the fact that, while HB2 was technically gone, the lawmakers who passed it had won out in the end.

“While we understand the concerns of those who say the repeal of HB2 did not go far enough, we believe the recent legislation eliminates the most egregious aspects of the prior law,” he stated in a release.

In the end, Silver wasn’t about standing up for equal rights, he was about kowtowing to Michael Jordan, majority owner of the Hornets.

In his own release, Jordan unsurprisingly talked money, not civil rights.

“We want to thank Commissioner Silver for his leadership throughout this process and for the decision to bring NBA All-Star back to Buzz City,” he wrote. “AllStar Weekend is an international event that will provide a tremendous economic impact to our community while showcasing our city, our franchise and our passionate Hornets fan base to people around the world.”

To me, going back to where we were before is not leadership, it’s giving in. When progressive leaders back down, it lets the other side know that they can be easily manipulated to agree to “compromise” that is in fact capitulation. And now we find ourselves in a similar situation with the recent ramping up of immigration enforcement by federal authorities in our city, as I describe in this week’s news feature on page 6.

I only hope that McFadden and the Mecklenburg County Sheriff’s Office stick to their guns on this one, because the progressive community should not be looking for any more compromise.

RPITKIN@QCNERVE.COM

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THE SCANNER

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GINGERBREAD MAN A car thief in northeast Charlotte gave police one hell of a fight last week, and while officers were able to recover one stolen car, they did so at the expense of their own. According to the report, officers spotted the suspect driving a stolen car in the Belmont at Tryon apartment complex near the Cabarrus County border. The suspect ran when he saw police, and eventually fought them when they caught up to him. They were able to get him into custody, however, if only for a short time. Officers said the suspect did “significant damage to a police vehicle” — the electronics, specifically — to the tune of $400 in damage after being detained, then he was able to somehow escape custody while still in handcuffs.

DISCOUNT DOUBLE CHECK A 45-year-old New Jersey man was visiting Charlotte recently but went home without the safety net he came with. According to the man, someone broke into his car while it was parked outside of a hotel on Arrowood Road and stole a handgun, some power tools, a pack of Newport cigarettes, some cash and and a $6,000 check from State Farm that he had not gotten a chance to cash yet. The only question now is: Was the insurance money insured?

ALL BARK, NO BITE In a recently filed noncriminal report, a 25-year-old northwest Charlotte man told officers that he had misplaced his teeth. The man said that between 1 a.m. on Jan. 1 and noon on Jan. 2, he lost six HUNGER GAMES A 49-year-old man in 10-karat gold teeth, worth a total of $300. Not the Highland Creek neighborhood of north a good way to start the new year.

Charlotte fell victim to a crime that hasn’t been regularly reported since the pioneer days. The FREEZE! A Coulwood man was relieved of man told officers that someone attacked his his wallet while relieving himself near his home with a bow and arrow, resulting in $10 in home recently. The man told police that he damage to the frame of his garage door. was urinating outside on his own street when someone approached him from the rear and CONCHED OUT A 41-year-old man was put a gun to his head. The thief robbed the man hospitalized with minor injuries after being of his wallet, which had $50 inside, and an LG assaulted with a strange weapon in southwest phone, but the bright side is that he definitely Charlotte. The report only states that the did not piss his pants when a gun was pointed suspect “struck the victim with a weapon,” but at his head. the only evidence listed in the report was a “white seashell with victim’s blood on it.”

SHOE STRING BUDGET Police released photos of a man who went on a robbery spree in east HEAD IN THE GAME A 24-year-old man was Charlotte at a number of different department perhaps a little too focused on the pick-up stores, and it seems the man had an odd basketball game he was playing in recently at affection for shoe strings. According to one Cherry Park near Uptown. When the man got report, the man walked into a Payless Shoe done with the game, he realized that his car Source on Eastway Drive and implied that he was no longer where he parked it. He would was holding a gun under his jacket. In the end, later tell police that someone stole the keys all the man took was an unlisted amount of to his vehicle from where he had placed them money and a package of shoe strings. next to the basketball court, and then walked right over to the car that he had parked right in All reports are pulled from Charlotte-Mecklenburg front of the basketball court and drove off in it. Police Department files. Suspects are innocent until proven guilty.

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Hector Vaca (left) and other protesters stand outside the local ICE offices during a recent press conference.

PHOTO BY RYAN PITKIN

CONFRONTING THE NEW NORMAL

Community reacts to statewide ICE crackdown

O

BY RYAN PITKIN

N JAN. 7, a room full of law enforcement officers and community members looked on as a group of activists held a press conference in the Stancil Center of the Mecklenburg County Sheriff’s Office in Uptown Charlotte.

Leaders from organizations like SAFE Coalition, Comunidad Colectiva and the Latin American Coalition were there in support of new Mecklenburg County Sheriff Garry McFadden on his 30th day in office. They spoke about how McFadden was living up to his campaign promises

to end solitary confinement and resume inperson visitation at the jail upstairs, but mostly they talked about the end of 287g, the infamous program that for 12 years had allowed deputies in the jail to identify undocumented arrestees and enter their names into a national database.

“I commend Sheriff McFadden for sticking to his campaign promises to help stop family separations in Mecklenburg County by ending the 287g contract and making members of our community feel safer,” said Sebastian Feculak with the New South Progressives.

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Yisel Pomier (left) with the Latin American Coalition discusses volunteer opportunities at a recent gathering.

The press conference signaled a fresh start to the new year. At no other time in recent memory had a group of activists hosted an event in support of any law enforcement entity.

Stefania Arteaga with Comunidad Colectiva wrapped up the mood of the day with an optimistic tone.

“I think overall the message that we’re hearing is that together we’re standing in solidarity — not only standing in solidarity as a community, but we’re standing in solidarity with the sheriff that stands for our beliefs, that stands for our community and sees the bright future of Mecklenburg County,” she said.

When asked about comments from Immigrations and Customs Enforcement officials implying that the end of 287g would lead to an increased presence of immigration officials on the streets, Arteaga remained steadfast.

“There’s a misconception in the overall Mecklenburg County community, but ICE has always been out there,” she said. “This is not changing anything. It’s simply fearmongering.

They try to continue this rhetoric that they’re going to do something they never did before, however, they’ve always done so.”

Just a month later, however, ICE followed through on threats to intensify the enforcement of immigration laws with a sweeping series of arrests in Mecklenburg County and across the state that’s harmed local businesses and left many in Charlotte’s immigrant community scared to leave their homes.

Regional ICE director Sean Gallagher warned

PHOTO BY RYAN PITKIN

that the ramped up raids and arrests will be “the new normal” for counties like Mecklenburg and Wake, where new sheriff Gerald Baker has also ended participation in the 287g program. Now, area activists are mobilizing to confront federal authorities, pressure local officials in action and help families affected by the arrests.

The crackdown began with a raid at Bear Creek Arsenal, a gun manufacturing plant in Sanford, a town of about 30,000 people with a large Latinx and Hispanic population. Agents with Homeland Security Investigations showed up at the plant on Feb. 5 and began questioning employees in the break room. In the end, agents arrested 27 Bear Creek employees who they said used false documents and fake social security numbers when they were hired.

While that action was part of a separate yearlong investigation, it did kick off a week in which 200 people around the state would be arrested by ICE. At a press conference at the Charlotte Department of Homeland Security offices on Friday, Gallagher blamed McFadden directly for the increased intensity of ICE actions.

“The Mecklenburg County sheriff’s decision to restrict cooperation with ICE serves as an open invitation to aliens who commit criminal offenses that Mecklenburg County is now a safe haven for persons seeking to evade federal authorities,” he said. “ICE will now have no choice but to conduct more at-large arrests in local neighborhoods and at worksites, which will inevitably result in additional collateral arrests instead of arrests at the jail where enforcement is safer for everyone involved.”

Agents stand outside of the local ICE offices while a press conference takes place inside.

Gallagher also stated that the Mecklenburg County Sheriff’s Office has been releasing dangerous criminals back out onto the streets since doing away with 287g. About a quarter of the people arrested by ICE in the first week of February had criminal convictions.

A statement released on Feb. 10, the MCSO refuted Gallagher’s claims.

“The Sheriff does not set bail, and the Sheriff does not determine when individuals are eligible for bail,” the statement read. “For ICE representative Sean Gallagher to suggest that dangerous people are suddenly walking out of jail because of the termination of the 287g policy is engaging in cynical fear mongering [sic].”

The release went on to list ways in which the MCSO still cooperates with ICE, including sharing arrestee fingerprint records, honoring criminal warrants from ICE and verifying a person’s citizenship status for felonies and impaired-driving offenses.

“Sheriff McFadden is deeply committed to keeping the community safe and is committed to providing ICE access to the Mecklenburg County jail,” the statement read. “If ICE is interested in addressing violent crimes committed by all citizens and not just those committed by immigrants, Sheriff McFadden would embrace the opportunity to work with ICE to address violence at all levels in our community.”

By the end of the week, more than a dozen arrests had taken place in Charlotte, and Arteaga recorded calls into the Comunidad Colectiva hotline reporting arrests in Hickory, Gastonia,

PHOTO BY RYAN PITKIN

Huntersville and Concord. She and her team relay that information through text to a network of people so that undocumented immigrants can be made aware of places they should avoid.

If she’s nearby, Arteaga will drive to the spot where a traffic stop or other ICE action is reported to observe.

“I’ve been the one that’s been confronting ICE, so it’s been nerve racking for myself as an immigrant, and it’s been very scary,” Arteaga said.

“We’re really trying to make sure that we work with allies who have citizenship privilege to be out on the streets and report back.”

Adding to the fear was the CharlotteMecklenburg Police Department, which ran a “traffic safety saturation patrol” in the Eastway division on Feb. 6 and 7, using 25 officers from four different area departments to carry out 124 traffic stops in just four hours.

“You have a federal agency at home here impersonating you for some of these stops, so why are y’all still doing stops in these predominantly black and brown neighborhoods where people are already scared?” Arteaga asked of police. “How is CMPD trying to rebuild trust in a period where maybe they should lay low or call out ICE for using these tactics?”

On Feb. 8, CMPD released a statement acknowledging the ICE arrests in Charlotte and stating that CMPD officers “have not and will not participate in ICE immigration enforcement,” adding that they are not required to inquire about a person’s citizenship status or give any such information to federal authorities.

Nevertheless, the timing of the aggressive

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FILE PHOTO: IMMIGRATION AND CUSTOMS ENFORCEMENT

patrolling in an area with one of Charlotte’s largest Hispanic and Latinx population did not help put members of the immigrant community at ease.

Kimberly Perez, a teacher at Charlotte Bilingual Preschool, said half of her students didn’t show up for school on Feb. 7, as word spread of the heavy ICE and police presence in east Charlotte.

Manolo Betancourt, owner of the popular Manolo’s Bakery on Central Avenue, said his business dropped by 75 percent that same day. He said he doesn’t know what to tell his employees when they ask about ICE. “I feel three different kind of fears: the fear of my customers, the fear of my employees and the fear that I have to face myself,” Betancourt told a group of about 30 people who came to the Latin American Coalition offices on Thursday night to learn how they could help.

Jamilah Espinosa, an immigration attorney who attended the gathering, said that her first piece of advice for people dealing with ICE is to remain silent.

“The best thing that people can do is be quiet,” Espinosa said. “The question that I always get is, ‘Is that going to prevent them from taking me?’

No, that doesn’t necessarily prevent them from

detaining you if they have information already that you’re undocumented. But that preserves a lot of your rights, because the first thing that immigration has to do is prove that you are not a citizen of the U.S. or that you don’t have legal status here.

“They only know who you are based on what you tell them. So what happens is, they get all this information from you, where you came from or how you entered, they prepare that in a document, and it’s the very first thing that they present to an immigration judge, and that’s the first prong that an immigration judge needs to deport you, and you’ve met that burden for them. Being quiet allows them not to do that.”

Once someone is detained, Espinosa said, it can be impossible to figure out where they’ve been taken. She quoted a Telemundo report about the Bear Creek Arsenal raid that said it was “like the ground swallowed them,” because families had no idea how to even contact their loved ones, let alone connect them with a legal defense.

“One of the first things that happens is, basically people say, ‘They disappeared,’ because we can’t locate them. If you don’t have the right information, it’s very difficult,” Espinosa said.

“A lot of times I receive calls where people say, ‘My brother is named so-and-so and can you find him somewhere in the United States?’ No, unfortunately, even though we’re in the 21st century, immigration does not have a great system in place for me to just call and say, ‘Hey ICE, do you have so-and-so in your custody?’”

But the main goal for Espinosa and local advocacy organizations is to not let it get to that point, which is why she’s constantly reminding anyone that she can about their rights if confronted by ICE. For example, many people don’t know that possessing a valid identification or presenting one to law enforcement is only required by law in North Carolina if someone is driving a vehicle.

If you’re just walking down the street, you do not need to have or show ID. “We want the community to realize that they have constitutional rights,” Espinosa said. “The biggest thing for our community is realizing that preserving their rights is the best way that us lawyers can defend them. When I do the ‘Know your rights’ [posts] over and over and over on Facebook, sometimes I have people say, ‘You say this all the time,’ but you have to be a broken

record, because when people get nervous, that’s the first thing they forget.”

That’s why organizations like Action NC are hosting Know Your Rights trainings and publishing Immigrant Preparedness Action Kits to help people create an action plan that they can implement if they’re ever caught up in an immigration enforcement action.

Hector Vaca, immigrant justice director with Action NC, has been a longtime activist for immigration issues in Charlotte, but said ICE has become as aggressive as he’s ever seen them recently.

“The immigrant community has been very scared because the truth of the matter is, if you look up the dictionary definition of the word terrorism, ICE is doing exactly what the dictionary definition is, which is scaring a population with random acts around town. So people have been scared,” Vaca said. “We’ll be working with different groups around town to see in what way we can help with rapid response, but the point is just working from the grassroots up.”

And that’s where change will come from if the community is going to change the new normal.

RPITKIN@QCNERVE.COM

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MINDSET MASTERY

A no-bullshit guide to kickstarting your fitness and health goals

Pg. 10 Feb.13 - Feb. 26, 2019 - QCNERVE.COM

BY BRITTNEY PEREDA

AS A SELF-MADE fitness entrepreneur, personal trainer and fitness nutrition specialist with over five years of professional experience in the industry and almost a lifetime in athletics, I consider myself very blessed to have the platform that I do to reach so many people in need of help. Now, with my new Queen City Nerve column, I’ve got another platform to help folks navigate the trends of the fitness world — breaking down what’s good, what’s bad and what’s just straight up ugly.

My name is Brittney Pereda and I am the owner of South Charlotte’s premier fitness and nutrition company, eXtreme Body Benefits, and I promise this won’t hurt as much as one of my training sessions.

To start, I’ll say that any great fitness trainer or nutrition specialist will always strive to continue their education and be eager to learn in this ever-changing age of information. Just like many other industries, in the fitness and nutrition world there are always new trends emerging, new theories being brought to the forefront and new social media influencers on the rise, flooding your Instagram account and ready to sell you every hot new method or product that the market has to offer. What separates a truly great fitness trainer from the rest is — for lack of a better way to say it — cutting through the mainstream bullshit and knowing that one size does not fit all.

As I’m sure you’ve noticed, it’s not as easy as it seems on the ‘Gram to achieve physical greatness — and by greatness I mean totally conquering your goals and finally getting that body you have always dreamed of. What most people fail to realize is that it’s a process that takes time. You can’t just wake up on top of the mountain, you’ve got to climb it first.

When it comes to making a lifestyle change, one word you’ve heard get tossed around is motivation. The thing about motivation is it’s easier said than done. Just following your Instagram favs, it would be easy to believe that these people don’t have any issues with working their asses off and eating right 24/7, so it must not be too hard finding that motivation to lose a good 30-40 pounds, right?

Unfortunately, what may work for your favorite influencer won’t always work for you. In fact, social media has taken the entire human component out of this whole “fitness” thing you are seeing on your feed.

I wish I could write about how simple it is to conquer all your fitness and health goals, but I’d be lying if I said it was an easy task. My role is to cut out the bullshit and get as real with you as I can so that you can understand how finding the motivation to succeed really works. When it comes to real world application of the most basic fitness and health principals, mindset is at the forefront.

The first thing I’ll share with you is the “Mindset Mastery” that I instill in my clients and everyone I work with daily. These tools will help you find and keep the right mindset, even when things get hard and life does everything it can to get in the way of you achieving your goals.

There are four steps to this process, and if you focus on them — and remain focused — you can take yourself places you never thought you could go.

First, understand the difference between motivation and discipline. You see, you may be motivated right now in this very moment. You’re all fired up reading this, telling yourself it’s time to make the change and commit to yourself. What you must understand is when it comes to the real world, simply put, the motivation isn’t always

going to be there. In fact, your motivation will leave you in the blink of an eye. It will leave you the second situations put you in a tough place — whether it’s a Friday night and the kids are eating pizza while you’re trying to hit your macronutrient requirements or you’re leaving a stressful day at work, 6 p.m. traffic has you in a bad mood and all you want to do is go home and put your feet up instead of go it to the gym.

Well, that was fast.

Let’s cut through the fluffy Instagram food posts and motivational quotes. What about the days you don’t feel like doing the damn thing?

That’s when discipline comes in.

To get motivated, you will need to condition your mindset to know that this current motivation you’re seeking doesn’t just appear one day, pull you out of your seat and drag you into the gym.

It just doesn’t work like that! You have to create your own motivation. You have to get up, turn off the Netflix, get dressed and go push yourself through an intense workout at the gym or a boot camp. You have to make the choice of eating the nutrient-dense salad with chicken over the mouthwatering, fattening burger with fried onion rings. If you can’t wrap your mind around doing this daily, then you have to rethink your goals.

Which leads me to my second focus: goals.

Have you written them down anywhere? Are they realistically attainable for you and your lifestyle?

Have you defined and personalized your goals? An example of a bad goal is, “I want to lose weight and get strong.” I hear it all the time. You haven’t put a date on that goal, you haven’t set a particular amount of weight you’d like to see come off and you haven’t defined your strength (like being able to do a full pull up without an assist).

If you create unrealistic goals or goals that are too broad, you’ve already set yourself up for failure.

Being truly honest with ourselves is a huge part of this process. Don’t be so extreme when you’re starting out. You can plan for a large goal, but also prepare small daily or weekly goals that will add up to that one end goal that you have for yourself.

I can promise you that each time you reach one of these smaller goals, your motivation to succeed will increase even more because you are seeing results.

Your third focus should be on taking full responsibility for your screw ups. Splurges and times of weakness may be something you think only you do, but almost everyone messes up. The problem is when they then plas the blame game and makes excuses as to why they haven’t fulfilled a commitment to themself.

As a coach, I see this happen all too often. We want something so bad, but when it doesn’t happen overnight, we have something I like to call a “Fuck It Day.” That’s when your mind takes control, making you think that you haven’t made any progress, when in all actuality, you’ve made a ton. After this happens, we feel so bad about what we did that we end up blaming everyone and everything except for ourselves or making the lamest excuses as to why our screw up was no big deal.

It happens. We are only human. Sometimes we get impatient, moody and just so damn hangry! But the day that you can be real with yourself and say, “Okay, I messed up, it’s all good I’ll just get back on it tomorrow morning,” is the day you’ve made serious improvements with your mindset. Just be real with yourself and take full responsibility. It is no one’s fault but your own. No need to stress out about it, just keeping moving forward.

Fourth and finally, set yourself up for success.

Filtering out the negatives in your life could be life-changing for you. Scratch that. It will be. But it takes an extremely strong individual to do this.

Whether it’s a sister, father, best friend or coworker, we all know a Negative Nancy when we see one.

These are the people that will tell you that you have never been able to lose weight and won’t be able to do it now. These are the individuals who will see your progress — see that you’re doing better than they are — and they’ll try their very best to knock you down a peg or stop you from progressing any further.

I have always wondered about the psychology behind this. It happens all the time, and typically with the people closest to us. By surrounding yourself with good influences who support your successes, you are taking the right steps towards achieving a better you. Your friends and family should want to join you because you are so inspiring, not the other way around.

At the end of the day, motivation isn’t easy to acquire. It’s actually really damn hard. The key is to stay positive and change your mindset. Through all the challenging days ahead, you can now get yourself up and going with a better outlook.

Remember, Rome wasn’t built in a day. This will take time. Everyone has their own thing, so go find yours and stick to it.

Brittney’s column will be published monthly in Queen City Nerve. Until next time, follow her on Instagram at @_brittneyfit_ and check out her business at extremebodybenefits.com.

THE SEEKER REIKI BREAKY HEART

Rested, restored and ready for more

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BY KATHERINE GRANT

FOR SOME, the anticipation of doing absolutely nothing brings forth a shockwave of unease. For me, on the other hand, any opportunity to turn off is key for my mental well-being. In my recent efforts to do exponentially less, I’ve been dipping my toes into the realm of restorative yoga.

For the newcomer, restorative yoga can best be described as a passive practice incorporating supportive props like blankets, bolsters and blocks.

The objective is to help the practitioner ease into relaxing asanas, or poses, designed to relieve the effects of bodily stress.

Restorative poses are held longer than your usual asana. It’s like taking a yoga nap; ideal for calming the sympathetic nervous system, which controls the fight-or-flight response, leading to a much-welcomed sense of mind, body and emotional-spiritual rejuvenation.

In my recent restorative practice class at NoDa Yoga, I explored the combination of both yoga and reiki, a form of healing based on energy. According to The International Center for Reiki Training, the word reiki is comprised of two Japanese words — “rei,” which means “God’s wisdom or the higher power” and “ki,” which is “life force energy.” Put together, reiki means “spiritually-guided life force energy.”

Similar to restorative yoga, reiki works on all levels of physical, emotional and spiritual elements to help reduce stress, anxiety and other ailments.

Our reiki master introduced herself as Alison Pulito, and followed up by introducing the four other reiki practitioners in the room. Together they would move seamlessly around the room, applying reiki to yogis individually throughout the session.

She then lead us through a guided meditation that was so calming, I asked for permission to take a picture of it after class for my own personal practice. She obliged.

She then initiated our hour-and-a-half-long restorative practice by allowing us to rest in supta baddha konasana, also known as reclined bound angle pose. It’s a deeply relaxing yoga position that’s achievable for students of all levels. Bonus points for being able to use a bolster and pillow, making it feel extra therapeutic. The thought of no texts, emails or

student loan spam calls for the next 90 minutes was extra comforting. I settled into my mat ready and willing to be lulled into a yoga reverie.

Once the meditation concluded, I peeked out of one eye as a reiki guide hovered her hands over my neighbor’s ears. She stayed there for about three minutes, then made her way in my direction.

Energetically speaking, I’m convinced I could feel her open palms above my head. I know from reading about reiki that the recipient can sometimes feel sensations during a session, which makes me think the soft throbbing I felt was completely normal. It was certainly not unpleasant.

From our reclined position we transitioned into a bolster-supported supine twist. Here they held their hands above the upper portions of our backs.

I didn’t feel the throbbing sensation again but my shoulder felt warm. I like to imagine this was the practitioner’s energy radiating through me, bursting through my emotional blockages. Sorry, not sorry, to my baggage. This year I’ve resolved to release all of the burdens I’ve encumbered for good.

We moved through a few more poses, with Mountain Brook being our second-to-last. This pose was new to me, but I immediately fell in love.

By placing a blanket under the neck and head, another blanket under the thoracic spine and bolster under the knees, this pose opens up the chest cavity. Considering I sorely suffer from tech neck, any kind of heart opener appeals to me.

Once in Savasana, also known as corpse pose, Alison took it to the next level of new-age wonder by complimenting our final resting pose with Tibetan singing bowls. These beautiful little bowls are not only aesthetically pleasing, their reverberations invoke a deep state of relaxation, healing and chakra balancing.

We concluded our 90 minutes together with a collective “om.” It was suggested that we close our practice with some drinking water to keep things flowing, so it was only logical to wrap up my lazy afternoon with a beer at The Company Store down the street. Beer is 90 to 95 percent water after all, so the math makes sense. Consider me rested, restored and ready for more.

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IT’S ALL FUN AND GAMES

Pg. 12 Feb.13 - Feb. 26, 2019 - QCNERVE.COM

Your guide to All-Star Weekend in Charlotte All-Star Weekend in Charlotte is going to be like CIAA 2.0 — or 10.0 rather.

Local officials have said it compares more closely to the 2012 Democratic National Convention in terms of the sea of people descending upon our fair city. At CIAA, for the most part, 90 percent of the people coming into town are doing so for the parties. But with the NBA All-Star Game, we expect the actual basketball to be as popular as the related nightlife. Not to worry, though, we’ve got you covered on both ends. Here’s a rundown of what to expect in terms of competition, then on the next page you can figure out where to throw down before and after the games. Visit allstarweekendcharlotte. com to see where prices are at leading up to any of these events.

CELEBRITY ALL-STAR GAME

There will be plenty of celebrities in Charlotte for All-Star Weekend, but there’s only one chance to see them compete on the court.

The recently announced rosters include plenty of Carolina ties, perhaps the most intriguing being former Carolina Panthers wide receiver Steve Smith.

We can’t wait to see the shit-talking that takes place on that court every time Smitty squares up with somebody.

Other Carolina connections include John Collins, PF, Atlanta Hawks singer Chris Daughtry, rapper Rapsody Jaren Jackson Jr., PF, Memphis Grizzlies and comedian/actor JB Smoove.

Kyle Kuzma, PF, L.A. Lakers Jayson Tatum, SF, Boston Celtics Home Team Donovan Mitchell, SG, Utah Jazz Steve Smith, former Carolina Panthers Kevin Knox, PG, New York Knicks great De’Aaron Fox, PG, Sacramento Kings Chris Daughtry, musician Trae Young, PG, Atlanta Hawks JB Smoove, comedic actor Rapsody, rapper World Team Jason Weinmann, hero of Hurricane Florence Deandre Ayton (Bahamas), C, Phoenix Suns Terrence J, former host of BET’s 106 & Park Lauri Markkanen (Finland), PF, Chicago Bulls Famous Los, influencer OG Anunoby (England), SF, Toronto Raptors Dr. Oz, host of The Dr. Oz Show Luka Doncic (Slovenia), SF, Dallas Mavericks Mike Colter, Luke Cage Rodions Kurucs (Latvia), SF, Brooklyn Nets Bo Rinehart, member of Christian rock group Cedi Osman (Turkey), SF, Cleveland Cavaliers Needtobreathe Bogdan Bogdanovic (Serbia), SG, Sacramento Kings A’ja Wilson, WNBA player Josh Okogie (Nigeria), SG, Minnesota Timberwolves Jay Williams, Duke great, college basketball analyst Shai Gilgeous-Alexander (Canada), PG, L.A. Clippers Ben Simmons (Australia), PG, Philadelphia 76ers Away Team Quavo, Migos rapper More: Feb. 15, 9 p.m.; televised on TNT; Spectrum Hasan Minhaj, comedian, host of Patriot Act with Center, 333. E. Trade St. Hasan Minhaj ALL-STAR SATURDAY James Shaw Jr., Waffle House hero The Dunk and 3-Point contests and are pretty selfAmanda Seales, comedian explanatory. The former is always a fan favorite, Ray Allen, NBA Hall-of-Famer even if the lack of big names has decreased the A.J. Buckley, SEAL Team excitement around it in recent years. Still, with Bad Bunny, reggaeton musician Hornets small forward Miles Bridges in the mix, the Stefanie Dolson, WNBA player hometown crowd has a dog in the fight.

Marc Lasry, Milwaukee Bucks co-owner Adam Ray, comedian Dunk Contest: Miles Bridges, SF, Charlotte Brad Williams, comedian Hornets; John Collins, PF, Atlanta Hawks; Hamidou Ronnie 2K, 2K Sports Diallo, SG, Oklahoma City Thunder; Dennis Smith Jr., More: Feb. 15, 7 p.m.; televised on ESPN; Bojangles’ PG, New York Knicks Coliseum, 2700 E. Independence Blvd.

3-Point Contest: Kemba Walker, PG, Charlotte RISING STARS CHALLENGE Hornets; Devin Booker (defending champ), SG, A fun game for xenophobes, this game for NBA’s Phoenix Suns; Seth Curry, SG, Portland Trail Blazers; up-and-coming stars pits American-born players Stephen Curry, PG, Golden State Warriors; Danny against those who came from out of the country.

Green, SG, Toronto Raptors; Joe Harris, SF, Brooklyn Watch the Queen City Nerve social media channels Nets; Buddy Hield, SG, Sacramento Kings; Damian for live posts from this game, but if we hear a single Lillard, PG, Portland Trail Blazers; Khris Middleton, “Build the wall” chant, we’re fucking out of there.

SF, Milwaukee Bucks; Dirk Nowitzki, PF, Dallas Not to sound un-American, but we’ll probably Mavericks be rooting for the team who has a guy literally named OG. More: Feb. 16, 8 p.m.; televised on TNT; Spectrum U.S. Team Center, 333 E. Trade St. Jarrett Allen, C, Brooklyn Nets Marvin Bagley III, PF, Sacramento Kings

68TH NBA ALL-STAR GAME

The NBA ended the East vs. West theme last year and brought things back to the playground, allowing two captains to pick teams from a roster of starters then reserves to fill our their teams. This year’s captains are Lebron James of the L.A. Lakers and Giannis Anetokounmpo of the Milwaukee Bucks.

The most exciting part of the big game on Sunday is that hometown boy Kemba Walker, arguably the best Hornets player to ever play, finally got the nod as a starter. At the All-Star draft on Feb. 7, however, Walker was the last starter picked. Here are the rosters in order of how they were picked: TEAM LEBRON

Starters Lebron James Kevin Durant Kyrie Irving Kawhi Leonard James Harden Reserves Anthony Davis Klay Thompson Damian Lillard Ben Simmons LaMarcus Aldridge Karl-Anthony Towns Bradley Beal Dwayne Wade TEAM GIANNIS

Starters Giannis Anetokounmpo Steph Curry Joel Embiid Paul George Kemba Walker Reserves Khris Middleton Nikola Jokic Russell Westbrook Blake Griffin D’Angelo Russell Nikola Vucevic Kyle Lowry Dirk Nowitzki More: Feb. 17, 8 p.m.; televised on TNT; Spectrum Center, 333 E. Trade St.

PARTY TIME

Where to get down when everyone’s in town FEBRUARY 14

All-Star 2019 Weekend Charlotte Party Passes What: Fitzgerald’s is throwing a party every night with DJs and celebrity guests to celebrate the All-Star Game.

More: $100; Feb. 14-17; Fitzgerald’s Charlotte, 201 E. 5th St.; tinyurl.com/AllStarFitz All-Star Weekend Party Pass What: Another all-weekend party pops up at the Gantt Center for the event, with tickets available for day and night parties.

More: $50 and up; Feb. 14-17; Harvey B. Gantt Center, 551 S. Tryon St.; tinyurl.com/AllStarGantt Welcome to Charlotte Block Party What: Welcome Floyd “Money” Mayweather to the Queen City, just don’t pick a fight with him.

More: $25-8,000; 9 p.m.; Bland Street Station, 200 E. Bland St.; tinyurl.com/NBABlockParty Valentine’s Day All-Star Weekend Kick-Off What: DJ Electro Global’s Latin-Caribbean tunes.

More: $25-250; 10 p.m.; Bakadi Lounge, 4205 Monroe Rd.; tinyurl.com/AllStarBakadi Unified Souls All-Star Weekend What: Grammy and MTV award-winning DJ Kemit blows into the Queen City at Crown Station for a pop-off to the All-Star Weekend.

More: $20; 9 p.m.; Crown Station Coffee House & Pub, 3629 N. Davidson St.; crownstationpub.com

Pg. 13 Feb. 13 - Feb. 26, 2019 - QCNERVE.COM

FEBRUARY 15

Welcome to the City: All-Star Edition What: The two-level club is hosting DJs Kid Capri and Daddy D for a welcome-to-Charlotte party in the city’s music hub.

More: $50-75; 8 p.m.; Club One, 950 NC Music Factory Blvd.; tinyurl.com/ClubOneNBAParty All-Star Weekend w/ Tokyo Jetz What: Up-and-coming brash and abrasive — but truthful and heavy-hitting — rapper Tokyo Jetz is flying into CLT for a performance at Tropix.

More: $15-100; 10 p.m.; Tropix, 4701 N. Tryon St.; tinyurl.com/AllStarTokyoJetz

All-Star Weekend Day Party What: Before the night’s festivities, camp out at The Rabbit Hole for DJ Polo and Keith Murray.

More: $20 and up; 11 a.m. - 6 p.m.; The Rabbit Hole, 1801 Commonwealth Ave.; therabbitspot. com/the-rabbit-hole Looniey Entertainment ASW Party What: Looniey is bringing in local talent including Deniro Farrar and Jayway Sosa.

More: $17.31 and up; 9 p.m.; The Rabbit Hole, 1801 Commonwealth Ave.; therabbitspot.com/ the-rabbit-hole Jeezy All-Star Celebrity Tip-Off What: This one is posted as “an event so big we had to create a luxury experience.”

More: $60 and up; 8 p.m.; Graham Street Station, 2020 N. Graham NBA All-Stars Black Food Truck Friday What: This is most likely the only family-friendly event in town, so grab the kids and enjoy an evening of games, jams, visual art and much more.

More: Free; 4-10 p.m.; Recess CLT, 832 Seigle Ave.; tinyurl.com/AllStarBlackFoodTruck All-Star Art Showcase What: NoDa is doing All-Star Weekend the only way they know how, with art and alcohol.

Salud Cerveceria will host the All-Star Weekend Showcase, a collection of art created by Vinnie Candalore of VC2art.

More: Free; 7-10 p.m.; Salud Cerveceria, 3306-C North Davidson St.; tinyurl.com/vc2art Rehab: Friday Day Party What: DJ King and DJ Paradime hold down the fort to spin tunes all day before you head back out into the city for more parties past 7 p.m.

More: $15-20; 1-7 p.m.; Lucky’s Bar & Arcade, 300 N. College St.; tinyurl.com/LuckysAllStar

FEBRUARY 16

All-Star Bar Crawl What: It’s a bar crawl, what do you think is going to happen? You’ll probably get fucked up by the third bar and someone will have to drag your

semi-conscious body through the rest of the crawl.

Enjoy the weekend, ya’ll.

More: $30-1,000; 12 p.m.; Multiple locations; tinyurl.com/AllStarBarCrawl2019 Grown & Sexy All-Star Weekend Party What: Just like the price, it’s 25 and up only. You have to be a “real” adult to get into this shindig.

More: $25 and up; 8 p.m.; Londa’s Events and Catering, 1520 West Blvd; tinyurl.com/ GrownSexyAllStar LaDiDaDi Day Party What: Venues, please stop writing event descriptions in all caps. Anyway, this is another clusterfuck of a party spanning four venues with live artists and DJs, a go-go band and all that extra stuff.

More: $50-2,500; 12-8 p.m.; Oak Room, 200 E. Bland St.; tinyurl.com/LaDiDaDi2019 The Crossover — NBA All-Star 2019 What: Founders Hall is throwing a VIP bash with live performances, a premium open bar and celebrity DJs. We don’t know who’s in the lineup for the performances, or who the celebrity DJs are, but an open bar is enough to keep the party going regardless of who’s singing or spinning tracks.

More: $150-$500; Founders Hall, 100 N Tryon St.; tinyurl.com/crossoverclt LOL Live All-Star Weekend What: Kevin Hart’s Laugh Out Loud for the All-Star Weekend will feature comics Jay Pharoah, Jess Hilarious and DC Young Fly. Get away from the glitz and parties around the city and enjoy a night of laughs instead.

More: $55-99; 7 p.m.; Belk Theater, 130 N. Tryon St.; blumenthalarts.org

FEBRUARY 17

Gucci Mane: All-Star Weekend — Trap Gala What: Gucci Mane and special guests DJ Mark Da Spot are closing Charlotte’s All-Star Weekend out with a bang at Vine nightclub (attached to Ink-NIvy) this weekend.

More: $60-$100; 10 p.m.; Ink N Ivy, 222 S Church St.; tinyurl.com/guccimaneclt

Henny & Waffles Charlotte All-Star Weekend What: Unlimited mimosas, brunch buffet and $10 Hennessy cocktails? Uh, count us in. The menu has mac and cheese, waffles, crab balls and more. This is probably the only party worth going to.

More: $40; 1-8 p.m.; Oak Room, 200 E. Bland St.; hennyandwaffles.com All-Star Weekend Finale with Luis “Trikz” Da Silva Jr. What: Dress to impress at this event, as actor Luis Da Silva, Jr will be there to hang out after at the end of the weekend’s parties. Finger food and appetizers will be available when you need a break from gettin’ down on the dance floor.

More: $25-600; 9 p.m.; Recess CLT, 832 Seigle Ave.; tinyurl.com/AllStarFinale Day Dreams Day Party All-Star Weekend Grand Finale What: DJ Phife and DJ ENVY are kicking off Sunday parties with a grand finale day party, followed up by yet another party that evening. Hang out, maybe see an NBA All-Star player if they decide to show up.

More: $45-1,240; 1 p.m.; Loft & Cellar, 305 W. 4th St.; allstarmainevents.com NBA All-Star Weekend Day Party What: Gift bags, music, performances and food grace the venue for this grandstand finale event at Bar Louie. It’s probably the cheapest Sunday party out here, so that itself makes it worth the trip up to University.

More: $10; 4-8 p.m.; Bar Louie, 8760 J M Keynes Dr.; tinyurl.com/BarLouieNBA All-Star Brunch by Will’s Social Bistro & Lounge What: Waffles, chicken, eggs and mimosas.

Perfect end to a long weekend of partying. Treat your alcohol-soaked bodies with more alcohol and high-end brunch food. Yum. More: $30-45; 11 a.m. - 3 p.m.; Explicit Bistro & Lounge, 1000 NC Music Factory Blvd.; tinyurl.com/ AllStarNBABrunch

TEN NIGHTS IN RIO

Local Carnival celebration rings in a decade

W

Pg. 14 Feb. 13 - Feb. 26, 2019 - QCNERVE.COM

BY COURTNEY MIHOCIK

A NIGHT IN RIO

$15; Feb. 23, 7 p.m.; Neighborhood Theatre, 511 E. 36th St.; riocharlotte.com

A costumed samba dancer performs at 2018 Night in Rio.

PHOTO BY EDWIN DAVILA

E ALL NEED a night to let loose, Carnival is just the perfect time to do it.

While the pre-Lent celebration of Carnival is observed in countries ranging from Spain to the Netherlands, it’s biggest in in Rio De Janeiro, Brazil. The celebration of culture, history and dance draws tourists from around the world for a parade featuring thousands of dancers, performers and vocalists snaking down the Sambadrome.

For 10 years, Charlotte’s been celebrating its own version of Carnival called A Night in Rio, thanks to organizers Iya Silva and Tony Arreaza.

Though Silva and Arreaza tell different stories about how the celebration originally started, what we know is that A Night in Rio has kept its home at Neighborhood Theatre for 10 years, last year even featuring its own line of dancers weaving its way down North Davidson Street.

In addition to dance and celebration, A Night in Rio also includes authentic foods and treats from a Brazilian baker in Charlotte. Participants should look for empanadas, pastilles and other light pastry appetizers that showcase the country’s rich culinary tradition.

Silva, a lifelong dancer professionally trained in Brazilian styles, met Tony Arreaza, cultural events director for Latin American Coalition in Charlotte, in 2009 and the two have worked together to organize the event ever since.

Arreaza became interested in Brazil during his honeymoon with his wife, Ailen. After falling in love with the culture, food and music of the country, he knew he had to throw a Brazilian Carnival event back home. He had already been heading up the long-running Latin-American Festival, so zooming in the lens for a more directly focused celebration was a logical next step.

Silva had celebrated Carnival with her dance company in California since the mid-1990s, even earning the title of Queen of Carnival in San Francisco’s Carnival Ball in 2003. Throughout her career, she has also flown to Brazil multiple times to participate in Carnival and train professionally.

When she moved to Charlotte in 2008, she wanted to organize a Carnival event to continue the tradition.

Arreaza’s expertise in organizing events

coupled with Silva’s understanding of Carnival and Brazilian culture made their meeting kismet.

Arreaza has taken measures to ensure that the event is authentically Brazilian, inviting Brazilian musicians and dance companies trained in choreography like capoeira and samba. He even formed a Brazilian advisory group to help him keep A Night in Rio real. “[Silva] helped me find Brazilian people and I formed a community advisory of Brazilians, because I wanted it to be real authentic,” Arreaza said.

Without authenticity, Silva explained, the Brazilian community of Charlotte would be hesitant to come. One friend told her that they had stopped attending events billed as “Brazilian Carnival” because hosts would play a couple Brazilian songs and switch to a broader range of Latin music.

Since its inception in 2009, A Night in Rio has grown into a enormous and diverse celebration of Carnival and Brazilian dance and music.

Before Silva and Arreaza brought A Night in Rio to Charlotte, visibility was low for the city’s burgeoning Brazilian community.

“I feel like this event put their culture on the map,” Arreaza stated.

Not only has his attention to authenticity attracted homesick Brazilian immigrants, but all types of people who have come to love the annual party at Neighborhood Theatre.

“The beautiful thing, out of all the events that I organize, A Night in Rio is the one that is more diverse,” Arreaza said. “You’ll see Brazilians, but you see Caucasians, African-Americans, Latinos. It’s beautiful.”

While the Brazilian culture remains the focal point, it’s important to Arreaza that the community joins the celebration as a way to learn more about the city’s diverse population and revel in a night of festive music and dance.

“This event, it’s a bridge between the general Latinos, Mexicans, Central Americans, South Americans, to the general public in Charlotte,” he said.

The dancers, albeit not completely Brazilian, work in the time leading up to the event to be able to properly showcase the culture through samba dance. Silva, who is no longer an organizer but attends every year, sees the respect that the dancers have toward Brazilian culture through

“IT’S A BRIDGE BETWEEN THE GENERAL LATINOS, MEXICANS, CENTRAL AMERICANS, SOUTH AMERICANS,TO THE GENERAL PUBLIC IN CHARLOTTE.” Tony Arreaza, A Night in Rio organizer

Pg. 15 Feb. 13 - Feb. 26, 2019 - QCNERVE.COM

Samba dancers perform on stage in 2018’s Night in Rio.

their performances.

“I’m really proud of the dancers today. They’re putting in a lot of commitment. They understand the history, the passion, the culture and they’re respecting it, and they’re putting a lot of energy and time in it,” she stated. “Every year they get better and better and better.”

One of A Night in Rio’s most popular attractions is the capoeira performance, an impressive Afro-Brazilian dance consisting of martial arts and acrobatics. Performers with the International Capoeira School in Charlotte pull off mesmerizing flips and kicks, simulating a choreographed battle among dancers.

The intense performance is just one of many ways A Night in Rio reflects the high energy and all-day fun of the main event in Rio de Janeiro.

“The energy always needs to be high, because it’s Carnival, you don’t want to put people to sleep,” Silva said.

And she’s not one to tire easily. Silva is used to dancing in companies that would perform for five hours, switching between 70 different styles of dance choreographed to a live band. While A Night in Rio doesn’t require samba dancers to perform that long, the energy remains high, Arreaza said.

The feather-clad dancers can be seen in their intricately beaded two-piece costumes and heels,

PHOTO BY EDWIN DAVILA

sashaying and grooving in dance lines that last year led out the doors of Neighborhood Theatre and onto East 36th and North Davidson streets.

“It’s very energetic in a way that the dancers are really colorful, in authentic costume they either brought from Brazil or they made their own costume,” Arreaza said. “They’re very passionate about it and I think when you are seeing a show and you see people with that much passion, you get that energy.”

That energy is contagious, Arreaza and Silva agreed. Those who think they just came to watch can’t help but be swept up in a whirl of passion, and often begin dancing and celebration. It’s a great way to get all of your vices out of your system before the 40 days of Lent begin.

“Do all your craziness,” Silva said with a bright smile. “Fall in love with somebody. It’s for Carnival time. People get drunk, they do everything that’s crazy right before they have to do Lent.”

Last year was the first year the celebration spilled out into the streets of NoDa for a parade.

It was difficult to get the neighborhood to agree to it, Arreaza said, and will not be possible for this year’s event. But things will surely only get hotter with all that energy contained inside. There will also still be a mini-parade around the theater.

Arreaza hopes to one day move the event

to an outdoor space — but he’s not sure of the plausibility.

“I would love to outgrow it and do it in an outdoor space, because we got the people, the problem is that we still want to do it in February because that’s when they celebrate Carnival,” he explained. “So doing it in an outdoor location in

February is a no-no.”

Regardless of where it ends up, and regardless of whether you’re looking for a taste of home or want to learn about an unfamiliar culture, the best way to get a taste of Brazilian Carnival is to spend one night getting lost in Rio.

CMIHOCIK@QCNERVE.COM

#ShapingCLT:K(NO)W JUSTICE K(NO)W PEACE

WEDNESDAY FEB. 20, 2019

6:30-8:30pm

Join us for a discussion of the Charlotte Uprising two years later.

Featuring City council representative Braxton Winston and Greg Jackson with Heal Charlotte..

TICKETS:http://bit.ly/ShapingCLTKJKP

WEDNESDAY, FEB. 13TH PATTI LABELLE

What: Afrofuturism wasn’t officially a thing in the ’70s, but Patti LaBelle was already at the forefront of the movement with funky, glam rock-flavored hits like “Lady Marmalade.” Her career encompasses girl group pop, smooth R&B, adult contemporary ... and pies.

More: $24.50 and up; 7:30 p.m.; Belk Theater, 130 N. Tryon St.; blumenthalarts.org

THURSDAY, FEB. 14TH ‘MEGA TIME SQUAD’ SCREENING

What: Comedy meets crime meets time-traveling. Back Alley Film Series presents this flick about a small-time criminal in New Zealand who uses a stolen amulet to tamper with time and help him pull off money-grabbing heists. But as always, there’s consequences to messing around, temporally speaking.

More: $5-10; 7:30 p.m.; C3 Lab, 2525 Distribution St.; c3-lab.org

FRIDAY, FEB. 15TH

LIFELINE

Pg. 16 Feb. 13 - Feb. 26, 2019 - QCNERVE.COM

FEB. 13TH- FEB. 19TH

AN INTIMATE EVENING WITH SARAH MCLACHLAN

What: Folks of a certain generation only recognize Sarah McLachlan as the lady from the sad animal commercials, but those of us who were around in the ’90s remember the Lilith Fair founder at her peak, and how we could not help but be touched by her ’97 single “Angel.”

More: $25 and up; 8 p.m.; Belk Theater, 130 N. Tryon St.; blumenthalarts.org

SATURDAY, FEB. 16TH PETRA’S MARDI GRAS

What: Forget Bourbon Street, Mardi Gras is coming early this year at Petra’s. Come get down N’awlins style by enjoying music from Zydeco Ya Ya, Carolina Gator Gumbo and Molly Brown Kim on the trombone.

More: $8; 9 p.m.; Petra’s, 1919 Commonwealth Ave.; petrasbar.com

SUNDAY, FEB. 17TH THE FOXIES

What: This sly grunge rock outfit deceivingly mixes its sound with pop to create a devilishly addicting wave of music. Based in Nashville and headed by frontwoman Julia Lauren Bullock, The Foxies are on their way up, and it’s worth leaving your fox holes to see ’em.

More: $10-12; 8 p.m.; Neighborhood Theatre, 511 E 36th St.; neighborhoodtheatre.com

MONDAY, FEB. 18TH

NICKELUS F.

What: Between Player Made and Knocturnal, Snug Harbor has become the no-holds-barred champion of live hip-hop in Charlotte, and Knocturnal continues to attract solid acts like Nickelus F., who gained fame as Nick Fury on 106 & Park Freestyle Fridays before going on to build an impressive career.

More: $7-10; 9 p.m.; Snug Harbor, 1228 Gordon St.; snugrock.com

TUESDAY, FEB. 19TH ANDERSON .PAAK

What: Fresh off the release of his third studio album, Oxnard, Anderson .Paak is headed to The Fillmore to inject some funk and groove into your week. Paak’s energetic combination of rapping, singing and drumming makes this show the perfect pick-me-up for a Tuesday night.

More: $55; 8 p.m.; The Fillmore, 820 Hamilton St.; fillmorenc.com

Social Calendar a little light?

Check out

QCNERVE’S LIFELINE

for cool events happening in the queen city!

PHOTO BY CHRIS HOOPER

Pg. 18 Feb. 13 - Feb. 26, 2019 - QCNERVE.COM

The Player Made team (from left): A-Huf, Elevator Jay and Jaboi B-rab.

A NEW WAVE FOR THE OLD SCHOOL

Player Made is ready for All-Star Weekend

O

BY RYAN PITKIN

N ONE SUMMER night in 2017, James Blackmon, better known as Elevator Jay, was fresh off the release of his new album, Ain’t Nothin’ Finer. From the stage at Snug Harbor, where he was celebrating the two-year anniversary of the monthly Southern hip-hop party he launched in 2015 with friends Shane Coble and Aaron Hufstetler, Blackmon

peeked out the window to see a line stretching all the way down Gordon Street.

“I always look outside to see what’s going on, to see what it’s lookin’ like,” he recalls, “and there was a line from the front all the way down past Sherwin-Williams, and I was like, ‘Damn, we did this shit?’”

It was then that Blackmon fully realized that

Player Made: An Ode to Southern Rap had become a true staple of the Charlotte hip-hop scene. But he didn’t get long to revel in it, because Hufstetler, who DJs as A-Huf, started spinning the opening beats to the title track from Ain’t Nothin’ Finer.

Blackmon wasn’t expecting to perform, at least not in that moment, but he knew what had to be done.

“They kicked off ‘Ain’t Nothin’ Finer,’ I think A-Huf played it out of the blue, forced me to do it,” he says. “He’s always doing stuff like that, he will set it off, so then we just performed it. Everybody was chanting. I was just like, ‘Damn, this shit crazy, man.’”

Blackmon and Hufstetler are in the offices of Kevin Taylor, aka Radar, who has been designing graphics and printing merchandise for Permanent Vacation, the team responsible for Player Made, since before the monthly Player Made party was ever dreamed up. They’re here to pick up some special tees Taylor printed for what might be Player Made’s biggest party yet: All-Star Weekend.

The party is on Feb. 15, which isn’t the usual Player Made slot on the second Tuesday of the month, but it only made sense for Blackmon to work it out so he could put on a show representing the Queen City while the crowds were in town. He’ll be performing that night, and he’s bringing in Atlanta DJ Sofa King Evil to join on the ones and twos, plus a few “heavy hitter” surprise guests to share the mic.

Other than that, though, it’s just like any other night for Blackmon. He’s never been one to buy into his own hype, after all.

“It was a situation where I just felt like, at the time I came up with the idea, it’s All-Star Weekend, I ain’t got no shows, I’m always the person to go make my own show. I’mma book myself,” he says, his heavy drawl dripping with Southern grease.

“Let me book myself for All-Star Weekend, and do it like that. And along with that, let me call the homies and tell them to be a part of the show with me. Let’s do it like a regular Player Made night, except it’s All-Star Weekend.”

It’s nothing new for Blackmon to want to put on for his city. He’s been doing it since a teenager at West Charlotte High School, when he recorded an entire album on a Hewlett-Packard computer rapping through a mic that wasn’t even a mic, just a pair of headphones that he broke in half and plugged into a microphone jack.

He burned his songs onto a case of blank CDs and handed them out at school. Songs like “Blankin’ Hard” struck a chord with folks on the Beatties Ford Corridor where Blackmon was born and raised.

“A lot of people was digging it, because it spoke to the people, because they could relate to it,” he says. “It was like some Charlotte stuff, you feel me?”

Fast forward about 14 years, and Elevator Jay is a name that any Charlotte hip-hop fan will tell you is at the top of the list of rappers who represent Charlotte in everything that they do. But like anyone else, he gets along with a little help from his friends.

Pg. 19 Feb. 13 - Feb. 26, 2019 - QCNERVE.COM

PLAYER MADE ALL-STAR WEEKEND EDITION Feb. 15, 10 p.m.-2 a.m.; $5; Snug Harbor, 1228 Gordon St.; snugrock.com

In 2011 Blackmon met Shane Coble, who then went by Stranger Day but now goes by Rapper Shane. The two clicked immediately, and Blackmon quickly joined in with Coble’s Permanent Vacation crew, which is how he met Hufstetler.

The group grew a reputation for throwing sick parties, most notably the annual summer Squirt parties. Later, when Coble and Blackmon started DJing on the side, the two came up with the idea for Player Made while on a road trip back to Charlotte from the beach in 2015.

“He was getting into DJing, I was getting into DJing, I was like, ‘Man, let’s just throw a party. We can play anything we want to,’” Blackmon said, “Both of our favorite genres was Southern rap. So we were like, ‘That’s all we want to play.’”

To hear him explain it that way, it sounds like any conversation two stoned twenty-something dudes on a road trip might have. What was different was these guys had the experience to pull it off, and perhaps more importantly, the passion to see it through.

To hear Blackmon speak about Southern rap is like hearing an evangelical talk about Jesus.

“That’s me, I don’t know nothing else,” Blackmon says when I ask how important the Southern rap culture is to him. “I know music, and I’ve been inspired by other parts of the map, but at the same time, man, from me first being turned on to music, one of my first groups came from the South: Kriss Kross. Then I started listening to 36 Mafia, UGK, Outkast, stuff like that. It’s important to me.”

It’s a culture that Blackmon sees dying before his eyes. For all the popularity of trap music and the mainstream success of rappers from the South, Blackmon fears the original sound is being forgotten.

Every song he records, every Player Made party he throws, is a way of keeping that alive.

“I don’t want it to be like a lost art,” Blackmon says. “I’m trying to keep that going. That’s like if somebody culture started to fade out, you don’t want it to die. Prime example: A lot of Charlotte history, don’t nobody know what it is because they don’t like to keep it, they always trying to rebuild. Only thing you know is what somebody tell you, you can’t see it.

I don’t want Southern rap to get to a point where it’s like that. That’s where my music come in.”

For Hufstetler, the magic of a Player Made party is in the playlist. He says it’s his favorite gig to spin

at, because it offers him more room to work than other shows.

“To me, it’s always interesting trying to figure out what avenue of Southern rap we haven’t explored yet,” Hufstetler says. “There’s so many niches, like do we play enough Miami bass, do we play enough NOLA bounce, are we reaching back to things? Those are always in my mind. The things that I don’t get to do in the normal, everyday gig. I get to play 2 Live Crew tonight and nobody’s going to say anything, or I can play every UGK record I want to, or every Gucci Mane record I want to. I can play every Outkast B-side record I want to and they’re not gonna be mad at it.”

Hufstetler, raised in the Derita area of Charlotte, says he didn’t have anything like the Player Made parties when he was coming up in Charlotte. That’s one reason he and Blackmon — who would bring on Brandon Trammel, aka Jaboi B Rab, to fill out the Player Made crew when Coble moved to Portland, Oregon — feel it’s not only important to showcase the classic sounds of Southern rap, but to highlight local talent as well.

Over the years they’ve brought in up-andcoming rappers who they think deserve more shine to perform short sets at Player Made. For Blackmon, who’s always lifted up fellow Charlotte rappers, being able to spotlight new talent has been an important aspect of the monthly party.

He sees it as a way of uniting the scene, rather than make it more cliquey and competitive.

“Instead of bashing and debating about who breaking records and who ain’t, forget about all that man, we’re gonna put it to action. You ain’t gonna hear no whole concert, but you can come hear one, two, three songs from somebody we think is hot in the streets,” Blackmon says. “We like to get those people from the neighborhood that you might not know about. They brand new. You never heard of these people before ever.”

One rapper who was still on his way up in the local scene when he performed at a Player Made party in 2016 is Ismael Abdallah, known as Brio. He still remembers the experience as a pivotal moment for him in his music career, if not for the exposure alone than for the perspective it gave him.

“It really gave me a different outlook on other people accepting the music here, and just the diversity that it creates in the community as well,” Abdallah says. “I really appreciated that time because it gave me a different outlook on what I was doing, who my music was touching, who I was reaching out to and just seeing how it can affect different people.”

The diversity of attendees is what makes Snug

PHOTO BY JAYME JOHNSON

“WE LIKE TO GET THOSE PEOPLE FROM THE NEIGHBORHOOD THAT YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW ABOUT. THEY BRAND NEW.” -Elevator Jay

Elevator Jay works on his upcoming EP in the studio he shares with Black Pearl.

Harbor such a valuable commodity as a home to hiphop. The venue has long hosted a weekly hip-hop and b-boy party called Knocturnal on Monday nights.

It’s one of the rare venues in Charlotte that opens its arms to the local hip-hop community, but the fact that it also hosts a wide range of genres on any given night makes for a diverse crowd of walk-ins.

Add to that the fact that every Player Made party is “Free as Fuck,” (save for All-Star Weekend) and it’s one of the more inclusive and accessible regular events in the city.

Hufstetler says he’s been seeing a change in the Charlotte scene, and believes the reluctance around hip-hop in Charlotte venues is beginning to wear — maybe due to the success of Snug Harbor, but also because there isn’t really a choice.

“I think more clubs are getting accustomed to hip-hop because it is Top 40,” he says. “If you look at the Top 40, the Top 100 Billboard, it’s going to be 90 percent hip-hop, and I think Charlotte is having to adapt, which is a good thing.

“When we go to Atlanta, it’s like there’s no place in Atlanta where you can’t play hip-hop, from old to new, and I think it’s going to be the standard in Charlotte, too, like you’re going to walk in and hear Outkast, you’re gonna hear A Tribe Called Quest and that’s gonna be the playlist for a restaurant that’s serving 5-star dinner. That’s classy music now.”

Hufstetler’s comparison brings Blackmon back into a historical state of mind. His appreciation for the past frames the way he sees the future when it comes to Charlotte music and his role in it.

“The difference between us and Atlanta is them people got history, music that hip-hop was birthed on,” Blackmon says. “We talkin’‘bout blues and soul and all that stuff, Georgia been had that. North Carolina had a little bit of it, but in Charlotte, we’re coming off a scene where that history — when it comes to music — ain’t visible to everybody like that. So we really starting from scratch trying to tell people this the movement.”

When I sit with Blackmon in the west-side studio owned by his longtime friend and engineer Black Pearl on a recent Thursday afternoon, he’s back to work on solidifying that movement, mixing tracks for a new EP he plans to release in spring, Though he’s mum on most of the details, he plays me a track that would make any Elevator Jay fan hype at the thought that he’s got 10 more like it ready to go.

When I ask more about the new project, he’s reluctant to share, as he admits he’s “really not into teasing things,” but he eventually gives me the name. It couldn’t be a more fitting one, considering his career in the local music scene.

It’s called For Y’all.

RPITKIN@QCNERVE.COM

SOUNDWAVE ROCK/PUNK/METAL

Shana Blake and Friends (Smokey Joe’s) Steady Flow (Heist Brewery)

FEBRUARY 15 ROCK/PUNK/METAL

ring in the new year WITH THE GLORIOUS SOUNDS OF

VINYL

Junkyard, Charles Bonnet III & the Folkin’ Gasholes (Neighborhood Theatre) Litz, Akita, Tomatoband (Skylark Social Club) Michael Tracy Band (Evening Muse) Sinners & Saints, Blue Cactus, Vilai Harrington & The Hamptone (Petra’s) Bloodworth Project (Smokey Joe’s) The Remarks (Hattie’s Tap & Tavern) Darsombra, Damiyama, Nite Gallery (Tommy’s Pub) Thirsty Horses (RiRa) Bergenline, Charles Walker, Lonely Jones (Milestone) JAZZ/CLASSICAL/ INSTRUMENTAL

Taj Mahal Trio (McGlohon Theater)

LOTS OF CDS, TAPES, & TURNTABLES TOO

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tons of new & used vinyl needles, sleeves, frames, boxes, cleaners, all of your record needs shop local!

voted creating loafing “best RECORD STORE” 2012-2018

lunchboxrecords.com 825 CENTRAL AVE. CHARLOTTE, NC 704-331-0788

FEBRUARY 14

COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA

Jordan Middleton (RiRa) Kris Atoms (Comet Grill) Caleb Lee Hutchinson (Tin Roof)

COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA

Pierce Edens, Dirty Grass Players (Evening Muse) Drake White (Coyote Joe’s) Brad Vickers & His Vestapolitans (Thomas Street Tavern) Lenny Federal Band (Comet Grill) RAP/HIP HOP/SOUL/FUNK/R&B

Pluto For Planet (Tin Roof)

FEBRUARY 19

RAP/HIP HOP/SOUL/FUNK/R&B

Rising Stars Day Party & Concert Showcase (Evening Muse) King Myers, Valley Gawd, Lil Wo, Thurdii, Splash Gang Entertainment (Evening Muse) The Golden Era of Hip Hop: Chubb Rock, Special Ed, Positive K, Monie Love (McGlohon Theater)

Open Jam w/ the Smokin’ Js (Smokey Joe’s) Azotador, Perpetual Warfare, Nemesis, Morganton (Milestone) Jesse Lamar Williams & the Menastree Jazz Jam (Evening Muse) Telltale and Happy (Skylark Social Club) Uptown Unplugged with Ellie Morgan (Tin Roof)

COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA

COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA

Erin Enderlin, Brooke McBride (Evening Muse) Courtney Lynn & Quinn (Hattie’s Tap & Tavern) Caroline Keller Band (Summit Coffee House, Davidson)

Michael Glabicki of Rusted Root, Dirk Miller (Neighbor-

FEBRUARY 17

FEBRUARY 20

Metal Church Sunday Service (Milestone) Omari & the Hellhounds (Comet Grill) The Foxies (Neighborhood Theatre) The Spongetones: Post Valentine’s Day Relationship Songs (Evening Muse) Jason Moss and The Hosses (Tommy’s Pub) Black Hearts Ball (Heist Brewery)

February Residency: Hectorina w/ Gardeners, Brut Beat (Snug Harbor) Nightly (Neighborhood Theatre) Karaoke Wednesdays w/ KJ Michelle Ma Belle (Tommy’s Pub) Diva Sweetly, Heckdang, Rowdy leaf, Alright (Milestone) Quincey Blues (Smokey Joe’s Café) Rehab Jukebox (Evening Muse)

ROCK/PUNK/METAL

RAP/HIP HOP/SOUL/FUNK/R&B

Bone Snugs-N-Harmony (Snug Harbor)

Deniro Farrar, Jayway Sosa, Vegas McClain, DJ Mr. Incognito (Rabbit Hole)

FEBRUARY 18

FEBRUARY 16

Aaron Carter, Justin Stone, Rookie of the Year (Neighborhood Theatre)

ROCK/PUNK/METAL

4th Ave, Rayla, Aja9 (Neighborhood Theatre) Big Mama’s House of Burlesque: Valentease Burlesque (Visulite) Mike Strauss Band (Comet Grill) Maggie Valley Band (Thomas Street Tavern) Negulators, Skynoceros, The Day Drinkers (Tommy’s Pub) Aether Realm, Wilderun, All Hell, Rites to Sedition (Milestone) Moses Jones (Smokey Joe’s) Game Face (Mac’s Speed Shop, Matthews) RJ Acoustics (RiRa) Restless Carolina (Tin Roof)

ROCK/PUNK/METAL

POP

ROCK/PUNK/METAL

In Flames, All That Remains (Fillmore) Find Your Muse Open Mic: Kevin Tobin (Evening Muse) Jail Socks, Oragami Angel, Commander Salamander, Dollhands (Milestone) RAP/HIP HOP/SOUL/FUNK/R&B

Jazz Jam w/ Ocie Davids, Troy Conn (Crown Station) Knocturnal presents Nickelus F & Michael Millions (Snug Harbor) YNW Melly (Underground)

hood Theatre) Red Rockin’ Chair (Comet Grill)

ROCK/PUNK/METAL

FEBRUARY 21 ROCK/PUNK/METAL

Songs From the Road Band (Evening Muse) Shana Blake and Friends (Smokey Joe’s Café) Open Mic Night w/ host PK (Tommy’s Pub) Uncle Buck, Superbody, Glimpses (Petra’s) Angry Earth (Milestone) Lisa DeNovo (RiRa) POP

Randy Culbertson & Friends (Summit Coffee House, Davidson) Music Open Mic (Crown Station) COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA

Moses Jones (Comet Grill) RAP/HIP HOP/SOUL/FUNK/R&B

ThouxanbanFauni (Underground)

SOUNDWAVE Big Sam’s Funky Nation, Africa Unplugged (Neighborhood Theatre) JAZZ/CLASSICAL/INSTRUMENTAL

Adrian Crutchfield plays Grover Washington Jr. (Stage Door Theater)

FEBRUARY 22 ROCK/PUNK/METAL

Who’s Bad (Fillmore) Demons, Sunday Boxing, Merit Badge (Milestone) VOLK w/ The Veldt, Biggins (Snug Harbor) Starrider (Smokey Joe’s) Mike Doughty, Wheatus (Visulite) The Dan Staton Band (Hattie’s Tap & Tavern) No Anger Control CD Release Party w/ The Commonwealth, Grandeu (Tommy’s Pub) Underground Owls (Mac’s Speed Shop, Matthews) Rusty Knox (Summit Coffee House, Davidson) Wicked Powers (RiRa) The Jump Cut (Tin Roof) COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA

Time Sawyer, Dane Page (Neighborhood Theatre) Dead Horses, The Brother Brothers (Evening Muse) Tucker Beathard (Coyote Joe’s) Lenny Federal Band (Comet Grill) ROOTS/INTERNATIONAL

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Bakalao Stars, Pepe P & the All Star Latin Band (Evening Muse) JAZZ/CLASSICAL/INSTRUMENTAL

Neal Caine Plays Charles Mingus (Stage Door Theater)

FEBRUARY 23 ROCK/PUNK/METAL

Typesetter w/ Late Bloomer & BitterHeart (Lunchbox Records) Gasp w/ Sangre Cabrona, Professor, Brass Boussa (Snug Harbor) Off With Your Radiohead (Underground) Brangle Bros Band w/ Vertical (Tommy’s Pub) Matone (Mac’s Speed Shop, Matthews) Little Bird, The Business People (Evening Muse)

Asheville Circus (Smokey Joe’s) Groove Fetish (Thomas Street Tavern) Heroes at Last (RiRa) Cooper Alan (Tin Roof) COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA

Caroline Keller Band, Sugar & Steel (Evening Muse) Dylan Scott, Seth Ennis (Fillmore) Rick Spreitzer & the Antique Babies (Summit Coffee House, Davidson) Big Al (Comet Grill) Nate Randall Band, Ellie Morgan Band (Heist Brewery) JAZZ/CLASSICAL/INSTRUMENTAL

Neal Caine Plays Charles Mingus (Stage Door Theater) ROOTS/INTERNATIONAL

Su Casa (Petra’s) A Night in Rio: 10th Annual Brazilian Carnaval Experience (Neighborhood Theatre)

FEBRUARY 24 ROCK/PUNK/METAL

Metal Church Sunday Service (Milestone) Omari & the Hellhounds (Comet Grill) Arborlea, Soul Press, Shin Guard, Stress Fractures, Rat Poison (Milestone) Capital Vices, Makena, No Rope, Winters Gate, Hall of the Elders (Skylark Social Club) Fleetwood Mac (Spectrum Center) RAP/HIP HOP/SOUL/FUNK/R&B

The Dream (Underground) COUNTRY/FOLK/AMERICANA

Woody Woodworth with Jade Moore (Petra’s) ROOTS/BLUES/INTERNATIONAL

Bluegrass Open Jam w/ Greg Clarke & Friends (Tommy’s Pub) JAZZ/CLASSICAL/INSTRUMENTAL

Ron Brendle Quartet CD Release, Tryon Conn, Keith Davis, John Spurrier (Evening Muse)

JOBS NOT WALLS

Charlotte company goes to the root of Honduran exodus

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W

PHOTO BY NAHUN RODRIGUEZ

Unripe coffee on Simeon Ventura’s farm.

BY PAT MORAN

HEN MATT HOHLER brought

samples of his company’s Honduran coffee to fairs and festivals in rural areas outside Charlotte, he was surprised by some of the reactions. A handful of people took issue with the coffee’s country of origin.

“They said Americans don’t want Hondurans coming over here,” Hohler remembers. “They asked why Hondurans didn’t stay on their side of the border.”

Such attitudes are directly at odds with his company’s commitment to justice, he adds, a purpose that’s been baked into the business’ DNA since day one. In 2014, Hohler and his partner Robert Durrette launched Farmers First, a Charlotte-based coffee company dedicated to giving farmers a fair shake. The company partnered with two, and eventually three, Peruvian farmers, offering the growers a 50-percent bonus above market value for their coffee beans.

In 2018, Durrette and Hohler expanded their operations to include two new farmers from Honduras, Simeon Ventura from Santa Elena and Ana Santos from El Pedernal. So when Santos’ and Ventura’s coffee spurred a handful of negative comments, Hohler took it in stride.

The company’s goal then and now is to afford its farmer partners a dignified return for their crop. In 2018, Durrette and Hohler expanded their operations to include two new farmers from Honduras, Simeon Ventura from Santa Elena and Ana Santos from El Pedernal. So when Santos’ and Ventura’s coffee spurred a handful of negative comments, Hohler took it in stride.

His reply to the bigoted folks in towns like Lexington and Concord wasn’t the shot heard ‘round the world, but it was equally on target.

The comments provided an opportunity to have a conversation about the hardships Hondurans face, Hohler says. “[Many Americans] don’t realize that these people don’t want to leave their homes,” Hohler maintains. “Can you imagine if the best option for your family is to walk across three countries so they can survive?”

When Hohler frames the issue this way, he often sees recalcitrant customers soften, he

continues. “Half the time, when we hear a stronger remark, we ask the customer to take a free bag of coffee home.”

The fact remains, he continues, that asylum seekers from Honduras will keep coming to the U.S. despite any deterrents that authorities throw in their way, including draconian measures like separating children from their parents.

“There’s just an abundance of opportunity here,” Hohler explains, “jobs Hondurans are happy to do that most Americans won’t even touch.”

Last summer, Johnelle Causwell, citizen diplomacy director at International House in Charlotte, met Hohler at a summit on economic development and entrepreneurship. The summit, hosted by International House, focused on global connectivity and how it drives economic development. Hohler was one of the presenters.

Like Hohler, Causwell believes that many Americans aren’t hearing the entire story on Honduran refugees. Outreach efforts with the local community have done much to combat perceptions that the caravans consist of gang members and rapists, Causwell says, but there is still much to do.

“The narrative has become warped and distorted,” says Causwell. International House serves the local Honduran community, though none of the organization’s Honduran students and clients agreed to comment for this story.

As reported by CBS journalist Maria Jose Burgos, between 5,000 and 7,000 Hondurans and other Central Americans set out on foot toward the United States last October, hoping for asylum.

The caravan fueled a tide of racist rhetoric in the run-up to the U.S. midterm elections. In January, a new group of men, women and children fleeing systemic poverty and violence left Honduras for the American border.

Popular perceptions of the Honduran caravan, and of the kind of people joining the mass exodus from the impoverished Central American country, lie at the base of the controversy surrounding Trump’s divisive border wall. Conflict over the wall’s funding prompted the longest government shutdown in U.S. history, but Caswell still finds reason to hope.

PHOTO BY NAHUN RODRIGUEZ

Pg. 23 Feb. 13 - Feb. 26, 2019 - QCNERVE.COM

Simeon Ventura.

PHOTO BY NAHUN RODRIGUEZ

“Ever since the administration has taken on this divisive, hateful rhetoric against immigrants, I’ve seen a dramatic outpouring of warmth, giving and kindness [toward immigrants] from the local community,” Causwell says.

It will take time to solve our immigration issues, Causwell says, but in the meantime we all have to come together.

“We have to stop building walls,” she concludes.

“We have to start building bridges.”

But how to build that bridge? Durrette and Hohler may have an answer.

“Job creation is critical,” Durrette says. He’s speaking by phone from his other business, the D&D Brewery, Lodge, and Restaurant, located in the rural village of Los Naranjos in the Lake Yojoa region of central Honduras.

Durrette came to Honduras in 2009 and, except for a year-long sabbatical in Peru, he has lived there ever since. His experience with a private nonprofit convinced him that Honduras’ widespread poverty, of which the American-bound caravans are only a symptom, can be addressed with steady employment.

“Don’t get me wrong, a nonprofit building a community a water tower is a good and noble thing,” Durrette says. But if people don’t have long-term employment and the income that comes with it, they won’t be able to maintain community improvement, he continues. Countless projects built by nonprofits like Durrette’s former employer are simply falling apart because Hondurans can’t afford to maintain them.

Ana Santos at her farm in El Pedernal.

Durrette decided to open a business that would employ Hondurans, so he turned to one of the country’s most valuable resources: its aweinspiring natural beauty. Durrette notes that there are caves, a giant natural lake, 20 waterfalls and two national parks, Cerro-Azul Meambar and Santa Barbara Mountain, all within an hour’s drive of his lodge.

D&D was an existing business when Durrette took it over in 2011. He rebranded it as a brewery, lodge and restaurant. Now 40 percent of his customers are Hondurans, members of a smallyet-growing middle class. Many of these young professionals come to D&D from the city of San Pedro Sula, 44 miles away, often depicted as a hotbed of Honduran crime.

“I’ve lived in this country 10 years and I’ve never been robbed,” Durrette maintains. “I’ve never had a single issue.”

He feels the country’s crime rate continues to be overstated, both by xenophobic right-wing American media outlets and by sasylees seeking refuge and desperate to be admitted across the border.

Durrette stresses that his controversial viewpoint isn’t meant to trivialize the plight of those in the caravan.

“The reason why you are a refugee shouldn’t matter,” he says. “It’s a shame that they have to say they fear for their lives because of violence, when in reality they fear for their future because they have lost hope, and often don’t have enough to eat.”

Ana Santos’ farm in El Pedernal.

Durrette’s business currently employs 14 people in a country where full-time jobs are scarce. Much of the population — reports put the percentage between 80 and 85 — are paid under the table, Durrette says. Many of those people work in the coffee trade, which comprises close to 10 percent of the economy. Durrette knew little about the crop except that local farmers were not getting a fair price.

“There are acres and acres of coffee plantations, but these farmers weren’t making any money,” Durrette says. “It didn’t make any sense.”

In the meantime, Durrette met Hohler, who stayed at the lodge as a guest. Hohler shared Durrette’s views on economic inequality in the coffee business, so the two decided to launch Farmers First. Compared to the lodge, the coffee company is more likely to affect meaningful change, Durrette maintains.

“Farmers First has a lot more potential in the long term to be able to employ more Hondurans,” he says.

Results from the company’s two initial Honduran farmers thus far are encouraging, Hohler says. In her inaugural growing season with Farmers First, Santos has garnered a 62-percent boost in income after receiving her bonus. She’s currently constructing a brand new home on her farm. After his bonus, Ventura has netted a 118-percent boost in income. He now plans to send his son Ronmel to colleges.

Here in Charlotte, Hohler remains undaunted, even though he realizes that Farmers First is just

PHOTO BY NAHUN RODRIGUEZ

one small company trying to alleviate a complex socioeconomic problem.

“We’re going to keep growing, making more noise and helping as many people as possible,” Hohler says.

So far, he and Durrette are reaching receptive ears in Charlotte. At International House, Causwell finds that local business leaders are receptive to solutions to Honduras’ woes when she stresses an economic approach.

“The U.S. economy cannot function on its own,” she says. “It needs markets to sell goods, and natural resources to make its goods. We’re all connected.”

Durrette suggests that the connection should go even further to create a win-win situation, where alleviating poverty would also create opportunities for entrepreneurs.

“Imagine we had a multi-million-dollar fund, a grant to Americans and Hondurans to start up businesses in Honduras,” he says.

The businesses would bolster the Honduran economy, make a profit for investors and help bring people out of the poverty prompting the exodus for the U.S. border. In the meantime, our reaction to the caravans speaks directly to our own country’s agriculture roots, Hohler says.

“This is about who is picking our crops, and whether we’re taking care of them,” Hohler states.

We can no longer argue that we should only take care of our own, and ignore others on the wrong side of the border,” he continues. “These people are our own.”

PMORAN@QCNERVE.COM

DILWORTH BAKERSFIELD

Monday: $3 Jack Daniels Tuesday: $3 Tres Generaciones, $10 Don Julio 1942 Wednesday: $3 Bulleit Bourbon Thursday: $3 Espolon Friday: $3 George Dickel No. 8 Saturday: $3 Lunazul Sunday: $3 Larceny Bourbon 300EAST

Monday: 1/2 off wines by the glass Tuesday: 1/2 off beer cans and glasses of Italian reds Thursday: $3.50 local drafts & $8.50 Matilda Wong cocktails Sunday: 1/2 off wine bottles, $5 mimosas & bloody marys, $6 Bellinis BAD DADDY’S BURGER BAR

Monday: 20-oz. draft for 16 oz. price Tuesday: $5 specialty cocktails Wednesday: $3.50 local drafts Saturday & Sunday: $5 bloody marys and mimosas

DILWORTH TASTING ROOM DILWORTH NEIGHBORHOOD GRILLE

Monday: $4 Crown & Down Tuesday: $4 drafts, $12 pitchers, $5 flights of North Carolina drafts Wednesday: 1/2 price wine bottles and martinis Thursday: $12 domestic buckets, $18 import buckets Friday: $3 craft drafts, $5 flavored vodka Saturday: $5 mason jar cocktails Sunday: $4 bloody marys SUMMIT ROOM

Tuesday: $4 drafts Wednesday: 1/2 off glasses of wine Thursday: $7 Summit cocktails

SOUTH END COMMON MARKET SOUTH END

Monday: 1/2 off select pints Tuesday: Free beer tasting 5-7 p.m.

Wednesday: $2 off select pints, wine tasting 5-7 p.m.

Tuesday: Free charcuterie board with purchase of wine flight Wednesday: 1/2 off Toki highball Thursday: 1/2 off pinot noir bottles Sunday: $8 Blue Panther cocktail when Panthers are winning BIG BEN PUB

Monday: $5.50 20-oz. NoDa craft beer, $2.00 off vodka Wednesday: $5.25 20-oz. Spaten, 1/2 price wine bottles Fri: $5.50 20-oz. Crispin & Guinness, $5 Dale’s Fireball shot Sat: $5.50 20-oz. seasonal beers, $5 mimosas and bloody marys Sun: $5.25 20-oz. Boddington, $5 mimosas and bloody marys MAC’S SPEED SHOP

Monday: $3 pints, $5 Titos Tuesday: 1/2 price wine, $3 mystery draft Wednesday: $4 tall boys, $5 Lunazul Blanco Thursday: $3 mystery cans & bottles, $4 Jim Beam Friday: $1 off brewery of the month (Ballast

Point), $5 Fireball Saturday: $1 off North Carolina pints, $6.50 vodka Red Bull Sunday: $4 bloody marys and mimosas GIN MILL

Monday: $5 Titos & New Amsterdam, $4 craft beer Tuesday: 1/2 price wine Wednesday: $4 draft beer Thursday: $2.50 PBR, $5 Jack Daniels & Titos

UPTOWN THE DAILY TAVERN

Wednesday: $5 whiskey Thursday: $4 pint night Sunday: $4 Miller Lite, $6 bloody marys WORLD OF BEER

Monday: $2 off NC drafts and spirits Tuesday: 25 percent off bottles and cans, $5 mules Wednesday: 1/2 priced wine, wheats and sangrias Thursday: $4 old school, $4 well, $4 signature shots

Friday & Saturday: $3 shot of the week Sunday: $2 mimosas, $3 bloody mary and beermosas

NODA CABO FISH TACO

Monday: $5 el cheapo margarita Tuesday: $3.50 Tecate and Tecate Light, $5 Altos silver tequila Wednesday: $7 Absolut Lime Moscow mule Thursday: $1 off neighborhood beers on draft Friday & Saturday: $8 margarita special Sunday: $5 mimosas, $6 Absolut Peppar bloody mary, $7 Absolut Lime Moscow mule JACKBEAGLE’S

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Monday: $5 Cuervo margaritas Tuesday: $3 drafts, $5 vodka Red Bull Wednesday: $1 off whiskey Thursday: $6 Deep Eddy’s vodka Red Bull Friday: $5 Fun-Dip shots, $5 Crown Black Saturday: $5 Gummy Bear shots, $5 big mimosa, $6.50 double bloody mary Sunday: $5 big mimosa, $6.50 double bloody mary

SANCTUARY PUB

BILLY JACK’S SHACK

Monday: $7 Bulleit & Bulleit Rye, $3 Yuengling and PBR APA Tuesday: $6 Tuaca, $6 Tullamore Dew Wednesday: $3 Birdsong, $5 Sauza, $6 Espolon Thursday: $2 Bartender Bottles, $6 Crown Royal Sunday: $3 Birdsong, $3 Tall or Call

Monday: $1 off moonshine and moonshine cocktails, $3 domestics Tuesday: $1 off all drafts, $7 Jameson Wednesday: $1 off bottles and cans Thursday: $4.50 wells Friday: $5 Fireball, $1 off local bottles and cans Saturday: $4 mimosas $5 Brunch Punch, $5 Fireball Sunday: $4 mimosas, $5 Brunch Punch, $5 Fireball, $10 champagne bottles

NODA 101

Monday: $4 Ketel One Lemon Drop, $4 well liquor, $5 Camerena Tuesday: $6 seasonal cocktails, $6 Jameson, $4 Grape Gatorade Wednesday: $1 off whiskey, $5 Green Tea Shot, $6 Blue Balls Thursday: $5 Jagermeister, $6 vodka Redbull, $6 Oxley Gin Cocktail Friday: $5 Fireball, $6 vodka Red Bull, $6 Jameson Saturday: $6 Tito’s, $5 Fireball, $6 vodka Red Bull Sunday: $5 Deep Eddy Flavors, $1 off tequila, $5 White Gummy Bear shots $4 Draft special every day!

PLAZA MIDWOOD WHISKEY WAREHOUSE

Monday: $3.50 George Dickel Lemonade Tuesday: $3 Michelob Ultra, $6 classic cocktails Wednesday: $4 drafts, $3 sparkling rosé Thursday: 1/2 price wine, $3 Truly cans Friday: $5 remix classics, $4 Corona & Corona Light Saturday: $2.50 Miller Lite bottles, $3 Dos Equis drafts Sunday: $2.50 Bud Light, $5 Tito’s Saturday-Sunday: $2 mimosas, $4 bloody

mary bar, $5 Tito’s , $2.50 Bud Light HATTIE’S TAP & TAVERN

Monday: $6 Pabst & Paddy’s Tuesday: $5 Fireball Wednesday: $3 mystery craft beers Thursday: $6 margaritas Friday-Saturday: $5 well drinks Sunday: $10 domestic buckets

ELIZABETH CASWELL STATION

Monday: $2 domestics, $4 well drinks Tuesday: $3 pints, $5 Deep Eddy’s Vodka Wednesday: $3.50 NC Drafts, $5 Bulleit, 1/2 price bottles of wine Thursday: 1/2 price signature cocktails, $2 Tecate cans, $3 Dos Equis & Modelo Friday: $3 Yeungling drafts, $6 Crown Apple Saturday: $3.50 pub cans, $6 Jameson Sunday: $2 mimosas, $4 bloody marys, $10 domestic buckets

“Showing privates — male and female.”

“Offered me $200 for my number.”

LIQUID COURAGE

Bartenders share stories of love

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BY JUSTIN ZALEWSKI

IF ONLY SOMEONE could have transported me from 2009 — when I was just a young, testosteronedrenched buck in my mid-20s — into a day when I would be able to get on my phone and flip through some pictures to judge potential mates by looks alone until, BOOM, I found a match, I would have been like a kid in a candy shop. To be clear, I’m off the market (sorry, ladies) but my younger self would be in awe of how the dating scene has changed.

With the arrival of Valentine’s Day, what better time to talk about the bizarre, “Are you fucking kidding me, did that really just happen?” dating shenanigans that take place in a bar.

For this column, I hosted a roundtable discussion with bartenders from across the city. The all-star panel consisted of a mix of four men and four women, so as to get both sides of the coin. We have Erin Carter and Blaine Thomas of Blind Pig; Bethany McKenna and Julie Abdelrahman of SIP; Dustin Moates of Taboo; the now-retired Maggie Poske and Brettlee Blair; and Jon Murto of Vault and Murto Made Vodka.

What you are about to read will only give you a fraction of an idea of what it is like to bear witness to what can only be described as a nightly National Geographic documentary on the mating habits of the humans under the influence of the courageenhancing liquid known as alcohol.

What is the worst pick-up line you’ve heard?

“Is that your hair? We should hang out.”

“There’s something wrong with my phone. It doesn’t have your number in it.”

“Can you touch my hand? I want to tell my friends I’ve been touched by an angel.”

“Did you just fart? Because you blow me away!”

“I’ve lost my teddy bear! Can I sleep with you instead?”

What is advice you would give someone trying to pick you up?

“Do it when you are sober! And when the bar isn’t slammed.”

“If you are bold enough to leave your number on your receipt, at least leave a damn tip.”

“Don’t ever touch me!”

“Be genuine and not too aggressive.”

“Don’t wait until I am off work.”

Since I didn’t have a column in the previous issue, the cover story for which included a slew of “Tinder Terror” stories, I’d like to wrap this one up with the worst story I’ve heard resulting from online dating. Talking with a friend of mine a few weeks ago, she shared a story about a Tinder night gone nuclear. This friend of mine went on a date with her mystery man to the EpiCentre. The date started off what could be considered normal. Casual, semi-awkward conversation followed with shots and drinks to loosen the grip of wondering, “Am I on a date with Ted Bundy or Greg Brady?”

As the liquid confidence took hold, Mr. Bundy showed his true colors. He started to act out of sorts and pushed another patron who bumped into him.

My friend asked if they should leave the crowded bar to go somewhere less busy. Fight-or-flight was starting to work its way through her body. “Do I continue this date or tell this clown that my grandma has diarrhea and I need to tend to her bedside?”

My friend pushed through and went to the next bar. This is where everything went to shitsville. She went to the bathroom to freshen up — splash water on her face and hope the night would continue in a What is the most ridiculous thing a patron has somewhat normal fashion. Upon her return to the bar, done in an attempt to pick you up or get your she was greeted with Mr. Bundy yelling at the female attention? bartender and then throwing a pint glass at her. This is “‘Here is a 20 [dollar bill]. How much to get you the when my friend decided to make a run for it. rest of the night?’”

And with that, I’ll leave you with the same “Asking for my number and when I said, ‘I am sorry, advice I leave you with every month: Don’t forget to no,’ he left zero tip and continued to stare all night tip your bartenders! long.”

LILLY SPA 704-392-8099 MON-SUN 9AM-11PM EXIT 37 OFF I-85

WE ACCEPT ALL MAJOR CREDIT CARDS

SOUTH ON BEATTIES FORD THEN FIRST RIGHT ON MONTANA DRIVE (LOCATED 1/2 MILE ON THE LEFT 714-G MONTANA DRIVE

FEBRUARY 13 - FEBRUARY 19

FEBRUARY 20 - FEBRUARY 26

ARIES (March 21 to April 19) Doing something nice for others is typical of the generous Arian. But be prepared for some jealous types who might try to question one of your more recent acts of kindness.

venture might need more of your attention than you are able to provide. Consider asking a trusted friend or family member to help you work through this time crunch.

ARIES (March 21 to April 19) Some unsettling facts about a past situation could come to light. And while you’d love to deal with it immediately, it’s best to get more information to support your case.

TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) You’re eager to take on new responsibilities. But before you do, you might want to check out exactly what would be required of you so that you don’t face any “surprises” later.

SCORPIO (October 23 to November 21) A morepositive aspect helps you get a clearer focus on how to handle your time so that you can deal with several responsibilities that are just now showing up on your schedule.

TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) A straightforward approach to a baffling situation is best. Don’t allow yourself to be drawn into an already messy mass of tangles and lies. Deal with it and move on.

GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) It might be best to put off an important decision until a fluctuating situation becomes more stable. Recently received news could help resolve a long-standing family matter.

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CANCER (June 21 to July 22) If you still have a problem getting that information gap closed, you might consider asking a higher authority to resolve the matter, leaving you free to move on to another project.

LEO (July 23 to August 22) A family matter needs to be dealt with at the start of the week. Once it’s resolved, the Big Cat can devote more attention to that new opportunity that seems to hold so much potential.

VIRGO (August 23 to September 22) Pay attention to those niggling doubts. They could be warning you not to make any major decisions until you’ve checked them out — especially where money matters might be involved.

LIBRA (September 23 to October 22) A business

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 to December 21) A very close friend (you know who that is!) has advice that could help you work through a confusing situation. So put your pride aside and ask for it. You’ll be glad you did.

GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) Don’t be discouraged or deterred by a colleague’s negative opinion about your ideas. It could actually prove to be helpful when you get around to finalizing your plan.

a legal matter, regardless of whom you support.

Leave that to the lawyers.

SCORPIO (October 23 to November 21) An awkward situation presents the usually socially savvy Scorpian with a problem. But a courteous and considerate approach soon helps clear the air and ease communication.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 to December 21) A calmer, less-tense atmosphere prevails through much of the week, allowing you to restore your energy levels before tackling a new challenge coming up by week’s end.

CANCER (June 21 to July 22) Ignore that sudden attack of “modesty,” and step up to claim the credit CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 19) A you’ve so rightly earned. Remember: A lot of workplace situation could turn a bit tense. The best people are proud of you and want to share in your way to handle it is to confront it and deal with it achievement. openly. Doing so can help reveal the underlying reasons for the problem.

LEO (July 23 to August 22) A financial “deal” that seems to be just right for you Leos and Leonas AQUARIUS (January 20 to February 18) A could be grounded more in gossamer than colleague’s remarks appear to be especially substance. Get an expert’s advice to help you check cutting. But don’t waste your time or your energy it out. trying to deal with the situation. You have more important things to do.

VIRGO (August 23 to September 22) Don’t ignore that suddenly cool or even rude attitude from PISCES (February 19 to March 20) Support for someone close to you. Asking for an explanation your work comes as a surprise from someone you could reveal a misunderstanding you were thought was critical or, at least, indifferent. completely unaware of.

CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 19) Your approach to helping with a friend or family member’s problem could boomerang unless you take time to explain your method and how and why it (usually!) works.

BORN THIS WEEK: Your spiritual strength often acts LIBRA (September 23 to October 22) Unless you as an inspiration to help others make decisions have sound knowledge, and not just an opinion, it’s best not to step into a family dispute involving about their lives.

BORN THIS WEEK: You have a way of seeing the best in people and helping them live up to their potential.

AQUARIUS (January 20 to February 18) Someone who gave you a lot of grief might ask for a chance for the two of you to make a fresh start. You need to weigh the sincerity of the request carefully before giving your answer.

PISCES (February 19 to March 20) Too much fantasizing about an upcoming decision could affect your judgment. Better to make your choices based on what you know now rather than on what you might learn later.

2018 KING FEATURES SYND., INC.

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THE DOLL

Everyone deserves a good time

BY DAN SAVAGE

I am a 56-year-heterosexual man, and I have lived with ALS for the past six years. I am either in a wheelchair or in a hospital bed, and I have very little motor ability in my limbs. Like most or all male ALS patients, I still have full sensory ability, including a fully functioning penis. Are there safe websites or groups I can connect with that deal with helping paralytics like me find people who are interested in hooking up?

I’m talking about people who have a fetish for paralytics. I know that some people have a thing for amputees; I imagine there’s a fetish for any number of diseases or afflictions. When I was healthy, I was into light bondage. That seems like a redundancy now, but I can still get into dress-up and role-play. I would be cool if someone was into the whole bathing, grooming, dressing thing and whatever baby-doll fantasy they might have. Hell, I’d be happy if someone just wanted to give me a pity fuck!

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REALISTIC ABOUT GETTING DOMINATED OR LUSTFULLY LAID

“I struggled to find any specific online groups with respect to ALS and sexuality,” said Andrew Gurza, a disability awareness consultant and the host of Disability After Dark, a terrific podcast that explores and celebrates the sexual agency and desirability of people with disabilities. “But what RAGDOLL is looking for might not be directly related to his specific disability. It sounds like he is looking to engage with a community of people called ‘devotees.’ These individuals are attracted to people primarily because of their disabilities, and that might be what he is looking for. I know a couple

who used a devotee website to find each other, who dated and eventually married.”

If you’re open to playing with a devotee, RAGDOLL, Gurza suggests checking out Paradevo (paradevo.net), a website for “female devotees and gay male devotees” of disabled men.

“Many disabled people have also set up profiles on sites like FetLife to explore not only their fetishistic sides, but also how their disabled identities can complement and play a role in that,” said Gurza.

Now, many people, disabled and otherwise, look down on devotees, who are often accused of fetishizing disability and objectifying disabled people. But people who are exclusively attracted to the able-bodied and/or the conventionally attractive are rarely accused of fetishizing the able and ambulatory or objectifying the facially symmetrical. Which is why it has always seemed to me — and Gurza agrees with me on this point — that if being with someone who is turned on by your whatever-the-fuck is good enough for the able-bodied, it’s good enough for people with disabilities. Provided of course that, able or disabled, we’re appreciated for everything we bring to the table or the chair or the bed.

Ryan Honick, a disability advocate and public speaker, doesn’t think you should limit your search to websites aimed exclusively at the disability community.

“It’s estimated that one in five people have a disability,” said Honick. “And when I think about how challenging dating can be anyway — disability notwithstanding — my immediate thought is that RAGDOLL shouldn’t exclude 80 percent of the population from his search.

So I would encourage him to use some of the

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e BEST American Spa in Charlooe! mainstream apps — like Tinder, OkCupid, Bumble or Match — and put what he’s after front and center.”

Honick would caution other disabled people that putting your disability front and center — even on mainstream dating apps — is likely to attract the attention of devotees.

“RAGDOLL doesn’t seem like he would mind being with a devotee,” said Honick. “But those of us who do mind need to be a little more discerning.

I’ve inadvertently attracted a fair number of people with a devotee fetish, and it honestly squicked me out.”

Zooming out for a second: Safety is always a concern when inviting a stranger over for sex, RAGDOLL, even for the non-disabled. In addition to attracting the attention of a few good and decent people, devotees or not, your relative helplessness could attract the attention of a predator. So before

inviting anyone over, get their real name and their real phone number. Then share that information with a trusted friend — someone who can check in with you before and after a date — and let your potential new fuck buddy know you’re sharing their info with a trusted friend.

Second to last word goes to Honick: “Another option, if it’s available to RAGDOLL and he’s open to it, would be hiring a sex worker.”

And the last word goes to Gurza: “RAGDOLL shouldn’t resign himself to the idea that he’s a ‘pity fuck.’ His desires as a disabled man have full value and worth. And I want him to know, as a fellow disabled man, that he can have a fulfilling sex life and that someone out there does find him attractive.”

Follow Andrew Gurza on Twitter @ AndrewGurza, and follow Ryan Honick on Twitter @

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