QSaltLake Magazine - September 25, 2008

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Q World

Quips & Quotes

Court: Florida’s Gay Adoption Ban Unconstitutional

do not agree that ❝We [Southern Utah Pride’s]

BY REX WOCKNER

Florida’s gay-adoption ban is unconstitutional, Monroe County Circuit Court Judge David J. Audlin Jr. ruled Sept. 9. The law illegally singles out homosexuals for punishment, Audlin determined, according to the Miami Herald. It also violates the state constitution’s separation of powers by preventing family court and child welfare judges from determining what is in a child’s best interest. “The gay adoption ban operates as a conclusive or irrebuttable presumption that ... it is never in the best interest of any adoptee to be adopted by a homosexual,” Audlin wrote. The ruling came in the case of a Key West man who has raised a 13-year-old boy as a foster parent since 2001. The Herald said Audlin’s ruling is unlikely to function as legal precedent if it is not appealed, given that the adoption ban previously has been upheld by state and federal appeals courts.

Lesbian San Diego Councilwoman Marries

Out lesbian San Diego City Councilwoman Toni Atkins and her partner of eight years, Jennifer LeSar, were married Sept. 6 at the Lodge at Torrey Pines along the coast of the city’s north side. A May ruling by the California Supreme Court legalized marriage for same-sex couples. “It felt wonderful!” Atkins said in a Sept. 11 interview. “I feel completely different as a couple now. I wasn’t sure if we’d feel different afterwards as a married couple, after having been together for about eight years, although we didn’t live together until this year. But we both agree that it feels different. It feels more real, I guess I have to say.” “I felt my commitment was real before but somehow this feels ‘even more so,’ if that makes sense.” Atkins said “people cried, particularly Jennifer’s mother.” “She was very happy for us.” The ceremony, attended by “just a handful of very close friends,” was conducted by City Council President Scott Peters. The couple said the timing of their wedding was affected by the looming threat to same-sex marriage in California. On Nov. 4, voters will have a chance to amend the state constitution to undo the Supreme Court ruling and possibly prevent same-sex couples from marrying in the future, though gay activist lawyers are ready with an array of tactics to thwart the amendment’s coming into force should voters pass it. Three recent polls have found that between 51 percent and 54 percent of California voters oppose the amendment and between 40 percent and 42 percent support it.

Web site is worth what we were going to give them in print. We would make the exact same decision on any other business, organization or project in the community.❞ —St. George newspaper The Spectrum’s publisher Donnie Welch telling The Salt Lake Tribune why the newspaper pulled its logo from the festival’s Web site.

President Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva says that in Brazil, “there are men living with men, and women living with women” who “build a good life together.” But a proposed law that would give all same-sex couples rights equal to those enjoyed by married heterosexuals has been stalled in Brazil’s Congress for more than a decade.

Equality California Says It’s Passed 50 Pro-Gay Bills California’s statewide gay lobby group, Equality California, said Sept. 8 it now has passed 50 pro-gay bills through the state Legislature. “Partnering with the LGBT Legislative Caucus and allied lawmakers, EQCA has helped move California from a state with extremely limited rights for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people, to the state with the most comprehensive civil rights protections in the nation,” the group said. The 50-bill milestone was reached when all five EQCA-sponsored bills in the current legislative session passed both houses of the Legislature. The measures, including a bill establishing a day honoring the late gay activist Harvey Milk and legislation protecting seniors, foster youth and same-sex couples, are headed to Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger’s desk. “It’s easy to forget how far we’ve come in just 10 short years,” said EQCA Executive Director Geoff Kors. “A decade ago, LGBT people were not protected under California’s Fair Employment and Housing Act. Transgender people could be denied routine health care by their insurance providers, and same-sex partners were legal strangers.” EQCA helped create the country’s first domestic-partner registry, protect LGBT youth in schools and ensure that transgender Californians can secure employment. The group also helped make history in 2005 and 2007 when the California Legislature passed bills granting same-sex couples access to marriage, the only two times any state legislature has done so. Schwarzenegger vetoed those bills but in May of this year the California Supreme Court legalized same-sex marriage, and weddings began taking place June 16. “When I first came to Sacramento as an assembly member in 1994, California literally had no legal protections for LGBT people,” said Sen. Sheila Kuehl, D-Santa Monica. “We’ve completely turned that around. ... California now has the best, most

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comprehensive laws in place to protect LGBT people in every aspect of their lives.” “A decade ago, few people could imagine a California where same-sex couples would be able to marry,” said Assembly member Mark Leno, D-San Francisco, author of the marriage-equality bills. “Equality California’s strategic and tireless legislative work not only paved the way for this incredible victory in California, but it has also had a transformative effect on the rest of the country, giving hope to millions that the seemingly impossible can be done.”

Obama Answers Written Questions from ‘Washington Blade’ Barack Obama answered several written questions from the gay newspaper Washington Blade on Sept. 10. “Michelle and I have been blessed with many openly gay and lesbian friends and colleagues whom we have been close to for many years,” the Democratic presidential candidate said. “While that fact has made the issues facing the LGBT community more personal, the fundamental reasons I have for supporting equality are greater than any individual. ... We need to end the divisive politics of George W. Bush and pursue policies that treat all of us, regardless of identity or background, with dignity, equality and respect.” In response to another question, Obama said: “A college professor of mine helped me to see the lives of LGBT people from a different perspective. He was the first openly gay professor that I had ever come in contact with, or openly gay person of authority that I had come in contact with. And he was just a terrific guy. His comfort in his own skin and the friendship we developed helped to educate me on a number of these issues.” And Obama vowed, “If elected, I would call on Congress to enact legislation that would repeal DOMA and ensure that the over 1,100 federal legal rights and benefits currently provided on the basis of marital status are extended to same-sex couples in civil unions and other legally recognized unions.”

would be a big ❝Itpolitical liability [for southern Utah politicians to attend Southern Utah Pride]. I wouldn’t have any interest in supporting that movement.❞ —Washington County Commissioner Alan Gardner, who is running for re-election this November, telling The Salt Lake Tribune why he and many local politicians won’t be attending the Southern Utah Pride festival.

❝Depriving our [gay and lesbian] brothers and sisters of this most basic way to fill the very real need of physical affection is only part of what is denied when we deny them marital relationships. Marriage is about more than physical intimacy, it includes having someone to lean on, someone in your corner, a best friend to care for and someone who will take care of you. Marriage includes sharing all of onesself [sic] - heart, mind, body and soul, in an exquisite union.❞ —An administrative posting on the Web site MormonsforMarriage.org explaining why the group supports efforts to keep gay marriage legal in California.

❝AsSeptof15,5:0035%p.m.ofPST, all donors to protectmarriage.com are identified as Mormons, and their total contributions make up 29% of the total money donated. The percentages are growing everyday.❞ —An administrative posting to the Web site mormonsfor8.com, which tracks financial contributions by members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints to groups in favor of Proposition 8.


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SALT LAKE MEN’S CHOIR

t h g i l r a t S FROM THE

BALLROOM

RETURN TO THE 40s FOR A NIGHT OF MUSIC AND LIGHT FARE BENEFITTING THE SALT LAKE MEN’S CHOIR 1. t '3*%": 0$50#&3 KING ART CENTER, ROWLAND HALL-ST. MARKS SCHOOL McCARTHEY CAMPUS, 720 S. GUARDSMAN WAY

Salt Lake Men’s Choir transforms the King Art Center on the Rowland Hall-St. Marks School McCarthey Campus into the Starlight Lounge of the 1940s for one night only. Enjoy a hosted reception on the patio with a spectacular view of the city as the sun sets, the night lights begin to sparkle and a jazz trio fills the air with music. Featuring Beth Bruce. Then move inside for a performance by the choir featuring the music of Duke Ellington, Bing Crosby, Andrew Sisters and more. Everything from camp to torch, folk to swing. Incredible raffle prizes will help the choir raise funds for some vitally-needed items. 1940s attire encouraged. Join us Friday, October 3 at 7:30pm at the King Art Center, 720 S. Guardsman Way (1580 East). Tickets are $25 and are available by calling 801-913-7893 or by visiting saltlakemenschoir.org.   Sep te mber 25 , 20 08  |  issue 112  |  QSa lt L a k e  |  5


Q mmunity

Q Utah

QueeRead

Equality Utah Dinner Draws Over 1,300 by Michael Aaron

In an evening which could only be called slick and impressive, Equality Utah drew over 1,300 guests at its annual $100-per-plate fund raiser, the Allies Dinner. Candidates and elected officials from both major parties helped fill the Grand Ballroom at the Salt At the Equality Utah Allies Dinner (left to right): Equality Utah Executive Director Mike Thompson, GLSEN Executive Director Palace Convention Center. Kevin Jennings, Jane Marquardt, Sue Marquardt, Rev. Gene Robinson, Bruce Bastian While an attendance of 1,313 was short of its goal of 1,500 people, it was the group’s largest Laura Milliken Gray was also honored when students at Salt Lake City’s East High event since its 2005 inaugural dinner, which with an “Allies for Equality” award for her School tried to start their own alliance and drew 800. Last year’s attendance was 1,200. school officials banned all student clubs work in the community. She has dedicated Money raised by the dinner funds the much of her career to developing legal protecrather than allow the group to meet, as group’s list of endorsed candidates. This required by the Equal Access Act (which, tions for her gay and lesbian clients, working year, nearly 40 candidates were endorsed by within and around Utah laws restricting such interestingly, was a bill brought to the Senate the group. by Utah Sen. Orrin Hatch). rights. She is leaving her firm this year and will move with her wife, Agniszka Lesiewicz, After litigation by the Lambda Legal The dinner started off with a cocktail hour to London. Defense Fund and Salt Lake City attorneys and, as guests filtered into the ballroom, a Laura Milliken-Gray and Marlin Criddle, the Equality Utah lastly announced the 2009 Alvideo touting the theme of “The Power of lies Dinner, which will be held Aug. 19. school district allowed the group to meet. One,” was played on two huge screens flanking a large stage. The video had dozens of people telling what they had done, large and small, to make a difference in Utah’s gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender community. The sixth annual Southern Utah Pride Festimore” expected to join. Participants are The highlight may well have been Ruth and asked to check in by 11:00 a.m. to take their val will be held Sept. 26–27 in the cozy resort Kim Hackford-Peer’s 6-year-old son, Riley, places in the line. The parade will travel up town of Springdale, Utah. And organizers are with his curly red locks staring straight into Zion Park Blvd. and turn left on Lyons Blvd, predicting that this year’s celebration will be the camera and screaming, “Come on people funneling participants and watchers into the the biggest yet. — change the laws, why is it so hard?” festival grounds at Springdale Town Park. Festivities will begin Friday, Sept. 26 with Event co-chairs Jan Lovett and Brandie This year’s festival grounds will feature a what Southern Utah Pride Association PresiBalken welcomed guests and gave a brief number of activities, including a dance area dent Chris McArdle described as an addition history of the political action committee. open from 2:00–7:00 p.m. (presided over by to the programming to honor lesbian awareEquality Utah Chair Stephanie Pappas and DJ Pop ‘N Fresh), a number of vendors and a ness and lesbian participation in the event. executive director Mike Thompson took the health fair offering free HIV/AIDS and STD “We’ve decided to do a last-minute dyke stage and presented “Allies for Equality” testing. Organizations including the Utah march!” he said. Participants, he added, awards to Salt Lake City Mayor Ralph Becker Department of Health, the Utah AIDS Founshould meet at 7:00 p.m. at the intersection of and long-time allies Pat and Boyer Jarvis. dation, Planned Parenthood of Utah, ComZion Park and Lyons Blvds. (that is, the road Becker was chosen by the group for his domunity Counseling Center of Utah and the leading past the festival grounds at Springdale mestic partner registry, which was renamed Washington County HIV/AIDS Task Force Park). Participants will then march to the OC by the Utah State Legislature to the “Mutual will be present from 12:00–6:00 p.m. Tanner Amphitheater where they will open Commitment Registry,” as one of the first Salt Lake City drag queen extraordinaire the festival kick off dance at 8:00 p.m. The jam, actions of his term. He also played important Nova Starr will emcee performances on which will last until 2:00 a.m., will feature the festival grounds’ main stage, including roles while a state representative from 1996 tunes spun by local DJ Josh and globetrotting performances by color guard the Righteously until his election as mayor last year. DJ Dega, who has his roots in Salt Lake City. “I don’t know, I think ‘Mutual CommitAs in years past, SUP will also hold an ama- Outrageous Twirling Corps of Salt Lake City, local band Western Bone Cleavers and belly ment Registry’ just rolls off the tongue, teur drag contest on the Friday before the big dancers. Featured artists Liz Clark and Brian doesn’t it?” the mayor quipped. parade. Grand Marshal Dani Campbell (from Kent will perform later in the afternoon at Becker, as is his style, deflected the credit MTV’s bisexual dating show A Shot at Love 4:30 p.m and 6:45 p.m. respectively. A number for the success of the registry to his staff and with Tila Tequila) will crown the winners of gay and gay-friendly Utah politicians will those in the room. He became emotional as he — a king and a queen. The performance will also take the stage for a 2:15 p.m. flag ceremolisted those who came with him to celebrate start at 10:00 p.m. ny, including Sen. Scott McCoy, D-Salt Lake the award, including his mother and son. Saturday, Sept. 27 is an even busier day. City, Reps. Jackie Biskupski and Christine Boyer Jarvis spoke of being a “recovering Hungry festival goers can get breakfast at Johnson, D-Salt Lake City, and Democratic homophobe” and invited the other non-gay the festival grounds’ gazebo from 10:00 a.m.– gubernatorial hopeful Bob Springmeyer and allies in the room to “come out.” He said it noon. A microbrew beer garden will also be his Lt. Governor choice, Josie Valdez. was important that each person not quietly open throughout the day. Grand Marshal Dani Campbell will preside support the rights of gays and lesbians, but Another exciting last-minute addition, said over the evening’s events at the OC Tanner McArdle, is a motorcycle ride through nearby speak loudly “at work and at church and to Amphitheatre, including the introduction of Zion National Park allowing bikers to take your neighbors.” SUP’s King and Queen 2008, performances by advantage of the park’s free entrance day. The guest speaker for this year’s event was Nova Starr and the Salt City Kings, and a 9:30 Dubbed the Zion Thunder Bike Ride, it will Kevin Jennings, executive director of the performance by featured artist Ari Gold. The start promptly at 11:30 a.m. and end literally Gay Lesbian Straight Education Network. festival after-party will close the night. in front of the parade at 1:00 p.m. He spoke of the group’s efforts to enrich the Currently, the festival campgrounds are all The plan, said McArdle, is for the bikers to lives of young gay, lesbian, bisexual and but filled up, but hotel spaces in neighboring ride back to the parade and then lead it. transgender people, which began while he towns may be available. McArdle added that “Can you get the visual of the motorcycles was a gay teacher. One of his students, a festival goers bringing pets should be aware straight daughter of lesbian mothers, founded coming down the empty rode, vroom vroom, that animals are not permitted in the campand then the parade starts?” he said. the first Gay-Straight Alliance at Concord site, but can be housed in RVs. According to the event’s Web site, this Academy in 1988. year’s parade has 20 entrants with “many For info, visit southernutahpride.org. Attention was drawn to the group’s efforts 6  |  QSa lt L a k e  |  issue 112  |  Sep te mber 25 , 20 08

Southern Utah Pride Kicks Off

Starting in October independent Salt Lake City bookseller Sam Weller’s will host a book club for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender literature. October’s book will be Sarah Schulman’s Rat Bohemia. Copies, which will be available at Sam Weller’s at a 20% discount, will be in stock at the end of September. When: Oct. 22, 6:30 p.m. Where: Sam Weller’s basement, 254 S Main St Info: samwellersbookstore.blogspot.com

Book Festival The 11th Annual Utah Humanities Book Festival will again be held in October, featuring workshops, talks and film screenings centered on authors and readers. This year’s guests include Terry Tempest Williams, Honor Moore and Richard Peck. When: The week of Oct. 22 Where: Salt Lake City Main Library, 210 E 400 S, and other locations throughout the state. Cost: Free Info: utahhumanities.org/bookfestival.htm or Hikmet Loe at 801-3599670 or loe@utahhumanities.org.

Gay Bowl Pep Rally The organizers of Gay Bowl 8, an annual international flag football tournament that will be held in Salt Lake City this year, will hold a pregame pep rally and fashion show to kick off this year’s tournament in style. Cocktails will be available at the event, where the two teams from Salt Lake City will be announced. Bill Allred from X96’s popular Radio from Hell will also make an appearance. When: Oct. 5, 4-7:00 p.m. Where: Trolley Square Atrium, corner of 600 S and 700 E

I’m Coming Out The Utah pride Center will hold a brunch in honor of National Coming Out Day and Utah educators. When: Oct. 11, 10:30 a.m. Where: Salt Lake City University Park Marriott, 480 Wakara Way Cost: $25 per person or $250 for a table of ten. Sponsorships of $350 or more are also available. Info: utahpridecenter.org or Marina Gomberg at 801-539-8800.

NAMI Walk Another three mile walk to raise awareness of mental illness, dispel stigmas about these illnesses and foster hope for recovery will take place in September for the Utah chapter of the National Association for Mental Illness. Registrants can sign up as individuals or as a team, and the event is also in need of volunteers. When: Sept 27, 9:00 a.m. check in and 10:00 a.m. start Where: Franklin Covey Field, 77 W 1300 S Info: namiut.org, 801-323-9900


LDS Contribute Millions to Anti-Gay Amendment Members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints from California have donated nearly $4.5 million to a campaign to ban gay marriage in the state. The figures were collected by Mormons for Proposition 8, a group dedicated to providing readers with “as much information about the LDS church’s involvement in supporting California’s Proposition 8 as it can gather,” according to its Web site mormonsfor8.com. Californians will vote on the proposition, a constitutional amendment defining marriage as the union between a man and a woman, in November. The California Supreme court ruled the state’s ban on gay marriage unconstitutional on May 16. Voters passed that particular ban in a controversial 2000 referendum known as Proposition 22 and more popularly as the Knight Initiative after its author, then Sen. William Knight. Mormons around the country contributed millions of dollars to campaigns to pass this proposition. Last June, church leadership issued a letter asking California’s more than 770,000 Mormons to “do all [they] can” to support Proposition 8. LDS bishops across the state read the letter aloud during Sunday services. mormonsfor8.com tracked donations of over $1,000 by contributor name, city, state, date of donation and membership in the Mormon Church. A frequently updated spreadsheet on the Web site listed over 1,200 Mormons contributors (some donating as much as $100,000) whose money made up 29 percent of the estimated $15,869,613 supporters of Proposition 8 have raised. The site’s maintainers update the spreadsheet nightly. A handful of Mormons from other mostly Western states including Hawaii,

Idaho, Montana, Texas and Utah have also contributed sizeable donations. Some areas have yet to turn in their figures, however, and site organizers have not yet tallied or listed many smaller donations. Nadine Hansen, mormonsfor8.com’s maintainer, told the Daily Herald that she estimates “probably 80 percent of the money” donated to the proposition will come from individual Mormons by November. Hansen also said that she has used a variety of means to discover the LDS membership of donors, including examining blogs and talking to donors’ neighbors. “We didn’t know what kind of information we were going to get,” she said. “But we seem to be getting some very honest information from people.” Hansen, a member of the LDS Church who lives in Utah, declined to say whether she supports Proposition 8, stating that her Web site was “neutral” territory in the gay marriage debate. “We’ve had people from both sides think we are on the opposite side they are on,” she said. Hansen’s site includes links to gay Mormon support group Affirmation and the No on Proposition 8 campaign as well as pro-initiative groups ProtectMarriage. It also includes links to the California Secretary of State’s Web site that list large and small donations for 2000’s Proposition 22 by name, date and amount. Jennifer Kerns, the spokeswoman for ProtectMarriage, told the Daily Herald that while the LDS Church has lent significant support to the proposition, ProtectMarriage does not track donors’ religions. She added, however, that “a good portion” of the group’s 25,000 canvassing volunteers were Mormons.

‘The Gay Pages’ Is Printed After All Promised in January, then by March, then by Utah Pride, The Gay Pages, a phone directory of gay-friendly businesses (not to be confused with The QSaltLake Pages, published by QSaltLake), has begun hitting the porches of houses in Salt Lake City this month. A Salt Lake Tribune story in March reported that advertisers in the book were concerned that the publisher had skipped town. The addresses given for the company were a UPS Store mail box company and a Holladay office building where current tenants had never heard of the Pages. The house the publisher was living in was empty and up for sale and cell phone numbers had all been disconnected. The main number for the company rang to an automated voice message, but calls were not being returned, according to advertisers. Emails received the same response. A letter sent to advertisers at the beginning of the year explained the delay was caused by a burglary of Wright’s home of computers, with all advertising data, in December. The letter said that the company was working with its insurer to replace the computers and software and would post a publication date on its Web site “as soon as possible.” The Tribune reported that a report had been filed about a burglary at the home, but Wright and two female occupants of the home never returned phone calls by

sheriff detectives, so the case was closed. In response to the Tribune story, publisher Sean Wright said that his company was not out of business and that the books would be out “soon.” One possible reason for the delay may have been a problem in sales. Wright told FOX News in 2007 that he hoped for 300 advertisers for the 2008 edition. Only 126 businesses advertised in the book, a slight increase over the inaugural edition with 120 advertisers, according to Salt Lake City Weekly. QSaltLake and The QSaltLake Pages publisher Michael Aaron said he is glad the book has been published. “The last thing we, as a business, and we as a community need is for those trying to reach our community to get ripped off,” he said.

‘A Lullaby for Ryan’ to Raise Funds for PWACU Solo theatre artist Jade Esteban Estrada chronicles the last quarter century of the AIDS epidemic in the United States with stories of courage, strength and human triumph at a fund-raising event Sunday, Sept. 28 at 2:00 p.m. The event will take place at South Valley Unitarian Universalist Society, 6876 S. Highland Drive. Tickets are $20 and available at 801-4842205.

Sep te mber 25 , 20 08  |  issue 112  |  QSa lt L a k e  |  7

Downtown Farmers and Art & Craft Markets June 14- October 18, 2008 Saturdays, 8 am to 1 pm Historic Pioneer Park 300 South 300 West Downtown Salt Lake City Come downtown to shop at one of the country’s largest farmers markets. You will find fresh produce as well as local bakeries, native plants, cut flowers, Utah artists, certified organic growers, meats & cheeses, value-added products, and much more. Enjoy weekly entertainment in the company of your community. See you at the market!

www.slcfarmersmarket.org

Your source for downtown information, including these great markets.

VISIT THE QSALTLAKE BOOTH AT THE FARMERS MARKET EVERY OTHER WEEK ON PUBLICATION WEEKS

There’s Power in Our Pride.

Participate in the largest LGBT Community Survey in history, and help demonstrate the growing Power in Our Pride. Everyone who completes the survey by Sept 14, 2008 will be entered into a drawing to win one of FIVE iPod Shuffles or the Grand Prize of TWO free airline tickets from/to any of the participating airline’s destinations in the 48 continental U.S. States, plus Canada, Mexico and the Caribbean. Restrictions apply.

Please take the survey on our website today, and tell your friends!

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Tremendous strides toward full equality have been achieved by our communities over the past decade. There’s Power in Our Pride. Power to make a difference: • Gay and lesbian survey studies have opened doors (and minds) in leading corporations and organizations, which in turn have recognized the value of their LGBT employees through the establishment of equal hiring policies and domestic partner benefits. This has been a catalyst, leading to sweeping changes in political and social inclusivity. • Demographic reports also influence marketing investment. Virtually absent until recently, we now see a growing variety of products and services represented in gay media, celebrating our diversity. Ads keep LGBT publications and websites in business, serving their communities with independent news and information. • Beyond simply advertising, though, these companies support us in many ways, including sponsoring community events and funding community-based charities in order to earn our loyalty. • Taking an annual pulse on market trends through surveys helps demonstrate the LGBT community’s growing power, and influences positive change. We respect your privacy. All personal survey data is held confidentially by Community Marketing, Inc., an independent market research and communications firm based in San Francisco (founded 1992, and proudly 100% gay-owned and -operated) and will not be sold to third parties or used for marketing purposes. Thank you!

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www.CommunityMarketingInc.com


Q Utah Election 2008 Andrew McCullough’s ‘Obsession’ with Justice by JoSelle Vanderhooft

Libertarian attorney Andrew McCullough never envisioned making politics a career. That is, not until one of his friends ran afoul of the highway patrol. As McCullough tells it, an officer pulled the young woman over on her way to a picnic. Because of her slight speech impediment, he thought she was driving drunk or under the influence of drugs. The officer then arrested her, searched her car and booked her into the Davis County jail where she received a body cavity search. He found no drug paraphernalia in her car and a urine sample tested negative for illegal substances, yet the charge stuck. McCullough represented her in court. “This is years ago,” said McCullough, who can’t recall the case without tearing up. “It made me so mad that I filed [to run for] attorney general, and I did because I felt the attorney general’s office was jerking my client around. If I were attorney general and I’d seen someone who had been abused like that, I’d say lets talk about the size of the check. I’m still upset.” Upset enough to write to then-Attorney General Jan Graham explaining why he would not only decline to contribute to her campaign, but would actually oppose her. And upset enough to run against attorney general candidates of both main parties in the past four election cycles. This year, he said, will be his last attempt for the office. Although politics is a relatively new career path for McCullough, he has long made his living as an attorney, specializing in the First Amendment (specifically freedom of speech and assembly). His clients in this area include a number of Utah adult entertainment outlets, including Doctor John’s Lingerie boutique, strip clubs and escort services. “Needless to say, the government at various levels is always trying to regulate us to death,” he quips. “We think we provide a free speech service and they should leave us alone.” McCullough is also well-experienced in law cases pertaining to the Fourth Amendment of the Constitution, which guards against unreasonable searches and seizures by law enforcement and under which fall such issues as the right to privacy and protection from unlawful arrests. These include not only cases like that of McCullough’s friend, but cases of specific interest to gays and lesbians. The most recent was the 14th Street Gym’s suit against Salt Lake City. The suit alleged that police had unlawfully searched the gym, patroned largely by gay men, in 2004 and 2006 on suspicion that men were walking around naked and having sex in steam rooms. In 2004, the gym was temporarily closed and received a 90-day suspension of its business license for operating a

“disorderly house.” Two years later, the police searched the gym again and arrested two men for having oral sex in a steam room. They summarily closed the gym, and slapped its owners with public nuisance charges. In April, an appeals court ruled in the gym’s favor, stating that officers had no proof the owners condoned the sexual activity and that the sex was private activity. The second case, Provo City vs. Willden, involved a man accused of violating a city ordinance against soliciting sex in public by leaving a note in a Provo men’s restroom asking men to call him if they were interested in meeting up for sex. A policeman made an appointment with Willden and arrested him. In his brief, McCullough and his law partner at the time argued that such solicitations fell under the right to freedom of speech. After all, they argued, the Provo ordinance would not prohibit a man in a park from asking his wife to go home and have sex with him, or a man hitting on a woman. The Utah Supreme Court agreed, and declared the ordinance unconstitutional — so long as the sex was not for hire. The American Civil Liberties Union of Minnesota has cited this case in a brief supporting Republican Idaho Sen. Larry Craig’s appeal of his arrest for soliciting sex in an airport bathroom. “I’m very pleased and proud about that,” said McCullough, who sent Craig a letter after his arrest inviting him to publicly admit his sexual orientation and join the Libertarian Party. McCullough’s support for gay people has, he said, lead many to assume that he is himself gay, including one Salt Lake Tribune reporter in 2004. Although McCullough is straight, he said that he feels “a tremendous kinship with the gay community” because of the suspicion and discrimination he has faced as a single man “in LDS Society in particular.” “The assumption is that gay men are going to cause trouble, that if you don’t watch them they’ll fondle you or I don’t know what,” he said. “I’m damn tired of it.” He said he’s also tired of two more ways in which he sees the state acting as an “instrument of oppression:” Department of Child and Family Service workers removing children from their homes without solid proof of abuse or wrongdoing, and the war on drugs. He calls arresting people for marijuana use, for example, “absolute stupidity” and a big deterrent for addicts who won’t seek help out of fear of arrest. “We do it because we say they use substances that are dangerous to themselves,” he said. “I don’t think people should use substances that are dangerous to themselves, but if they do it’s not my business. I would pretty much end the war on drugs and in doing so I would cut the prison population by 30-50 percent. I’d also cut your need to pay the taxes — it’s expensive to lock people up.” Many Utahns seem to share McCullough’s disgust at the status quo. Indeed, several of them approached McCullough at the Libertarian Party’s booth during the 2006 Utah Pride Festival, asking him to run again and promising to donate to his campaign if he would. When they made good on their promises, McCullough also solicited donations. Al-

8  |  QSa lt L a k e  |  issue 112  |  Sep te mber 25 , 20 08

Q mmunity Suicide Prevention Walk The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention will hold its annual Out of the Darkness Community Walk to raise awareness of suicide and the people it leaves behind. Proceeds raised during the hour long walk will go towards local and national suicide prevention and awareness programs. Registrants can sign up as individuals or as a team and the event is also in need of volunteers. When: Sept 27. Registration starts at 8:45 a.m. and the walk begins at 10:00 a.m. Where: Wheeler Farm, 6351 S 900 E Info: outofthedarkness.org or Lori Pagel, 801- 949-6387 or afspslc@ gmail.com.

Gays for Obama

though he said his campaign is by no means wealthy, he added that he has amassed enough money “so I could be credible.” He said however he was “very, very disappointed” that Equality Utah was not among his political or financial supporters this year. Although the gay rights organization gave him a favorable mention, it endorsed Democratic hopeful Jean Welch Hill instead. McCullough criticized the endorsement in an open letter appearing in the Sept. 11 issue of QSaltLake, in which he accused Equality Utah of becoming “a captive of the Democratic Party” for endorsing only Democrats this year. Whatever the outcome of this year’s election, McCullough says he hopes to get candidates and the public talking about issues pertaining to individual freedom and what to do when the state wrongly interferes with those freedoms. “I want the state to stop hurting people,” he said. “I can’t do it by myself, but all anybody can do is his best.” McCullough’s campaign Web site is at andy4ag.com.

Poll Workers Needed for the November 4th General Election The Salt Lake County Clerk’s office is in need of dedicated individuals to serve their community as poll workers for the Nov. 4 general election. There are over 1,000 positions that still need to be filled. All poll workers are required to attend training prior to the election and will serve from 6:00 a.m. to 9:00 p.m. on Election Day. Poll workers will be compensated either $120 or $220 depending upon the position they serve. To serve as a Salt Lake County poll worker, you must be a registered voter residing in Salt Lake County. If interested in serving your community as a poll worker for Salt Lake County, please do not wait to contact the County Clerk’s office at 468-3477 during regular business hours Monday through Friday or visit the elections page on our website at www.clerk.slco.org.

The Utah LGBT for Obama group will hold a phone bank night to call local Democrats and independents and encourage them to vote. Training will be provided at each night and no experience is necessary as scripts and call lists will be provided. Food will be available, and participants are encouraged to bring friends to help. Patrick Hutchings will host each night. When: Every Tuesday until the November election, 5–9:00 p.m. Where: Obama Campaign Utah Offices, 780 E South Temple Cost: Participants are asked to contribute a few dollars to cover the cost of food.

Kickin’ ASS The Utah Stonewall Democrats will hold a Kickin’ ASS Party for locals to meet their endorsed candidates and enjoy an evening of good food and fun socialization. When: Oct. 16, 5:00 – 7:30 p.m. The public is welcome to attend. Where: The Market Street Oyster Bar – Cottonwood, 2985 E 6580 S Cost: $10 or more suggested donation. Memberships available.

OUTreach for Adults Formerly open just to teenagers, the OUTreach Resource Center of Ogden is now opening its doors for young adults. OUTreach invites adults ages 18–30 of all reaces, ethnicities, economic statuses, religions, sexual orientations and gender identities to come chat, socialize, play board games, or just relax with others. The Resource Center is located in the Unitarian Universalist Church of Ogden, but is not a religiousbased program. When: Thursdays, 4–7:00 p.m. Where: The Unitarian Universalist Church of Ogden (Lower Level, 705 23rd St. Ogden. Cost: Free Info: geocities.com/outreachogden


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Letters Pick the Person for the Job, Regardless of Sexual Orientation Editor, Equality Utah’s long-term goal of achieving the vision of a “Fair and Just Utah” is no easy task. It will take time, consistency and professionalism to change the current imbalance in our political system and the long-held biases against the LGBT community. Primarily, it will take a community of fair-minded individuals committed to the American value of equality. Equality Utah recently endorsed incumbent Representative Jennifer Seelig, a straight ally, for re-election. In doing so, the Board of Equality Utah did not endorse Seelig’s opponent, Gordon Storrs, an active and respected member of the LGBT community. This decision was made based on Rep. Seelig’s effectiveness within the legislature for both her district and for her support of LGBT issues. Rep. Seelig worked tirelessly during the last legislative session to promote, support and help pass HB325, which put statewide action on bullying and hazing in public schools and was one of Equality Utah’s primary legislative objectives. Our endorsement process is an indication of EU’s commitment to carry out its process without bias around any particular characteristics, including sexual orientation, gender identity, or political affiliation. One of our key goals is to get fair-minded individuals elected to change policy. Our work could easily be undermined by a message that sexual orientation “trumps” experience and demonstrated effectiveness. We must pick the best person for the job, regardless of their QSaltLake copyright © 2008. All rights reserved. No material may be reprinted or reproduced without written permission from the publisher. Copies of QSaltLake are distributed free of charge in 200 locations across Utah and in Idaho and Nevada. Free copies are limited to one per person. For additional copies, contact us at 801649-6663. It is a crime to destroy, throw away current issues or otherwise interfere with the distribution of this newsmagazine. Publication of the name or photograph of any individual or organization in articles or advertising in QSaltLake is not to be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of such persons.

sexual orientation. And, in politics, this includes factors such as incumbency, past leadership and electability. Equality Utah is a non-partisan organization that takes pride in endorsing a spectrum of candidates. It is true that a majority of our endorsed candidates have tended to align with the Democratic Party. Though EU continues to educate and work with all the major parties in Utah, the fact remains, that at the party level, our two main political parties have shown very different support for LGBT citizens of Utah. This fact is critical as we pursue our mission to secure equal rights and protections for all LGBT Utahns and their families. Politics can be a messy business, but it is critical for changing policy. Though not everyone in our community will always agree with EU’s strategies, we know that we all dream of a better Utah. Equality Utah will continue to focus squarely on achieving the vision of a Fair and Just Utah, with a conviction that in partnership with our entire community, we collectively are the powerful force of change. Executive Committee Equality Utah

Shoot Back

Editor, Salt Lake City Police Capt. Kyle Jones suggested 12 ways by which a gay Utahn might “keep ... safe” during criminal violence [“Staying Safe During a Shooting,” QSaltLake, Sept. 11]. His suggestions were good, but missed the target completely. Before violence happens, suggestions like his are good crime prevention. After violence happens, suggestions to punish the criminals appropriately are the kind of penalty enhancement that most hate-crime laws offer. Capt. Jones failed, however, to suggest the one thing that I’m certain he tells his officers to do “during a shooting” — shoot back. In fact, evidence gathered by the U.S. Department of Justice National Crime Victimization Survey continues to show clearly that a person who is confronted by a criminal is up to 2.5 times safer if the person resists with a firearm than without one. David Nelson Salt Lake City

10 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 112 | Sep te mber 25 , 20 0 8


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Sep te mber 25 , 20 08 | issue 112 | QSa lt L a k e | 11


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Ruby Ridge Firing Blanks by Ruby Ridge

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ust so you know, cherubs, while

writing this column I really struggled to not sound like a complete dick. So for better or worse, here it

goes. Over the last few months we have seen three savage beatings of gay men in South Salt Lake and Salt Lake City that have been ignored by prosecutors and buried by their respective police agencies. These are vicious crimes that didn’t occur in a small redneck town in Texas or Wyoming, but in a major metropolitan area with an established gay infrastructure and the largest population density of gays and lesbians in the state. So here is my question: Where oh where was the GLBT Public Safety Liaison Committee in all of this? Remember them? This was the committee that was designed to mesh gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgender people and public safety agencies together to promote crime prevention, and to provide a safe independent channel for gay folks to report crime without fear of reprisal. These were the guys charged with dispersing critical information to the gay community during

crisis. Yeah, where were they? Consider this, muffins: The attack on Dan Fair and DJ Bell occurred July 4 and the first sign of life from the GLBT Public Safety Committee was on Sept. 8 when Captain Kyle Jones of the SLCPD submitted an article to QSaltLake titled “Staying Safe During a Shooting.” Say what? Don’t get me wrong. I have always had a great respect for Kyle and his advocacy for our community, and there was some good information in the article should you ever get caught in the middle of a workplace shooting. And yes, I understand the logic about sitting facing a door at a restaurant so you can see who comes in (then again, watching an episode of The Sopranos could teach you that). But let’s face it, pumpkins, the odds of a mass shooting happening or of being caught in one are statistically tiny. I can’t help but wonder why when people commit actual harassment, hate crimes, assaults, drug-related crimes and property crimes against gay men does the Public Safety Committee come out from under the Cone of Silence to give us a primer on mall shootings? I

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was completely gobsmacked! The ugly truth, darlings, is that our gay sex drive, our affinity for a good time and our genetic predisposition for Long Island Iced Teas often places us in situations where we shouldn’t be. These are potential crime scenes waiting to happen. We are walking around parties and bars impaired, incapable of assessing our surroundings and risks. We are hooking up with strangers we meet on the internet in unsafe places and with little recourse if anything goes wrong. We turn a blind eye to the drug use that is all around us, despite the fact that many of us have had horrendous experiences with meth addicts. These things are the reality for those members of community who are at an elevated risk for victimization. Our crime prevention messages need to be aimed right at them and especially at our younger men who think they are invincible. We need to acknowledge that some of our folks operate in an area that is not black and white. It’s murky and subjective, and that’s why these folks are so hesitant to report crimes against themselves

or others. So my request to the GLBT Public Safety Committee is this: How about some really practical advice targeted specifically for our community. Like, how do I get from the bar to my car safely? How do I protect myself from former partners or roommates who are addicted to meth? How do I report a burglary or assault from a guy I met online? Where can I go for help with same-sex domestic violence? How and to whom do I report a robbery if I shared drugs with the guy? I understand these are not pretty topics. But I guarantee, honest responses would save lives, bring victims out of the shadows and send a message to criminals targeting the gay community that there are consequences, and they will be apprehended and punished. Maybe one day, even in South Salt Lake. Who knows! Ciao, babies!  Q

The ugly truth, darlings, is that our gay sex drive, our affinity for a good time and our genetic predisposition for Long Island Iced Teas often places us in situations where we shouldn’t be

Ruby Ridge has been writing for QSaltLake since Volume 1, Issue 1. She helps raise money for local nonprofits at 3rd Friday Bingo at First Baptist Church, 777 S. 1300 E. at 7pm. This month, it will be held Sept. 25.

Ogden: Oct. 9 - 11 Browning Center, Weber State University 801-626-8500 www.weberstatetickets.com Provo: Oct. 10 - 11 Covey Center for the Arts 1-801-852-7007 Logan: Oct. 17, 18, 20 Kent Concert Hall, Utah State University 435-797-8022 http://boxoffice.usu.edu

“Odyssey’s production of “Thriller” was truly a thrill for the audience, which was at times breathless with laughter, at times fearful and amazed, but always totally entertained.” - Salt Lake Tribune

12  |  QSa lt L a k e  |  issue 112  |  Sep te mber 25 , 20 08

Salt Lake City: Oct. 15 - Nov. 1 Kingsbury Hall, University of Utah 801-581-7100 www.kingsburyhall.com St. George, UT: Oct. 24 - 31 Tuacahn, 800-746-9882 www.tuacahn.org

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Guest Editorial The Plight We’re In

by Mel Nimer, Log Cabin Republicans

This is a great year to be alive, isn’t it? We have seen tremendous changes taking place all across the world that benefit our community. We now have two states that totally recognize gay marriages. Numerous states, counties and cities including Salt Lake City have recognized our unions as something of value. And for the first time in history both presidential candidates are on the same side of the gay marriage debate: that its legalization should be up to individual states and the courts. In fact, there is a very large absence of any discussion of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender issues this year. Neither party has been gay-bashing. In fact, both presidential candidates have welcomed the support of their respective gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender political caucuses. What a change this is from elections of the past where our community has been the scapegoat of those seeking a strong conservative base — namely the Republicans. Even here in Utah, we have had very little negative discussion of gay issues in any campaign. And this past year saw a number of laws proposed that support various areas of concern to our community, and a couple of them passed. This happened in a Republican-dominated legislature, and thanks in no small part to our Democrat legislators. Unfortunately, within our community this attitude of openness and fairness seems to be headed in the opposite direction. For the first time, Equality Utah has decided that they are no longer a “nonpartisan” organization. They are now the voice of the Democrats in Utah and by their own admission have decided to put all of their efforts into electing only Democrats to offices within the state. While I applaud their desire to be more effective in supporting gay issues, their recent actions are a sad commentary on what “equality” really means within our community. It is all too indicative of the attitude that most people within the gay community have towards Republicans. While I totally agree that the Republican Party, in general, has been the bane of our community for years, nationally and locally, this behavior is no excuse to ostracize members of the Republican party within our community, or Republicans who support the needs and issues of gay people, especially in such a “red” state as Utah. If we are ever to achieve our goals of equality, respect and fairness we must become involved in both political parties and promote the equality and respect we all want within our own family. Neither party, by itself, can succeed in changing the attitudes and the laws that affect us. And with such an overwhelming Republican majority in all areas of state and local governments, we need good, strong Republican supporters to reach our goals. Even here in Utah we can bring about

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change. Right now we have one of the most gay-supportive governors in our state’s history, as well as a very supportive attorney general. What other governor, Democrat or Republican, has ever invited any official gay organization to sit down and talk about our issues, or invited us to their home for a private reception? Governor Huntsman invited the Log Cabin Republicans do to just this. We did not ask for this invitation. And Log Cabin reached out to all of our friends and what we thought were our allies, including Equality Utah, to join us in that historic event. We included both Democrats and Republicans to build bridges within our community and our local and state government. And most of the Board of Equality came — and then turned their backs on us afterwards. We still have no explanation why, except that they apparently only want to support Democrats. Isn’t that what the Stonewall Democrats are supposed to be doing? Equality Utah is, by their own admission, supposed to be a non-partisan, “equality-based” organization that supports all candidates of any political party who are willing to help bring about positive change within all branches of government. Unfortunately, because of their new position, only two Republican candidates even bothered to spend time with them in discussing gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender issues, and only one of those even got a mention in their official endorsement announcement. And he is not only a supporter of these issues, but a real live member of our community. We have the opportunity to elect an openly gay Republican to the state legislature this year, and Equality Utah has chosen to support a non-family member over one of our own, just because he is a Republican. Utah Log Cabin Republicans is on a quest to help bring true equality to this state and to our local counties and cities. Most true Republicans believe in individual rights, limited government and freedom from laws that restrict us from being who we are. We are grounded in support of the constitution and don’t believe in amending it at every whim. In fact, California and Massachusetts owe the fact that they recognize gay marriage to the very conservative, Republican-appointed, constitutionally-based judges who sit on their supreme courts. It will be those same constitutional judges in the U.S. Supreme Court who will eventually bring about the national recognition of gay marriage. And it will be fair-minded Republicans here in Utah who will eventually be able to abolish the anti-gay marriage amendment to our state constitution. Democrats, alone, will not bring about these changes. We will be announcing our Republican endorsements for candidates across the state within the next couple of weeks, and there are many fair-minded Republicans seeking office this year. We have a list of candidates and are currently interviewing them. If you have a supportive Republican candidate in your neighborhood, please ask him or her to contact us. We would like to visit with these candidates and get their take on our organization’s issues and goals. We will give our endorsed candidates all the support and encouragement that we possibly can. We need your support to succeed. Come join our efforts to promote true equality here at home.  Q

Sep te mber 25 , 20 08  |  issue 112  |  QSa lt L a k e  |  13

Snaps & Slaps SNAP: Southern Utah Pride The Spectrum yanked its sponsorship over what they call a former staff member’s unauthorized decision to grant it in the first place. Southern Utah politicians — yes, even the Democrats — won’t be seen within five miles of it, because expediency usually trumps doing the right thing in their line of work. Still, despite a whole lot of stupid from many of southern Utah’s non-gay population, the Southern Utah Pride Festival has soldiered on for six years, growing in popularity, influence and national

recognition. This year, they’ve brought in several well-known musicians (like Ari Gold) and are expecting record numbers of attendees from all over the world. In a community where gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people face levels of isolation and discrimination that are pretty much unknown in Salt Lake City, SUP provides an invaluable service. So drive down to Springdale and go party, ya’ll!

SNAP: Mormons for Marriage But it’s not just gay people who are supporting the good fight for marriage equality in the Golden State. In the past few months members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints formed MormonsforMarriage.com

to share their pro-gay marriage perspectives with other Mormons and to advocate for gay marriage remaining legal in California. “Just as progressive LDS Church members in the 1960s and 1970s had an opportunity to speak out on the denial of priesthood to blacks — this is our chance, in our day, to express our thoughts and feelings (respectfully) in support of gays within the LDS Church, and of gay marriage within the United States (and abroad),” the site reads. Allies come from all religious backgrounds, including those with leadership that call gay sex sinful. We would do well as a community to remember this as voting on California’s anti-gay Proposition 8 draws ever closer.

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Queer Gnosis McCain Will Win, Unless ‌ by Troy Williams

D

MCCAIN/PALIN SCARE YOU AS much as it scares me? Are you freaking out as November inches closer? Are you watching the polls with your stomach in knots? Do you read the papers and cringe at what’s happening again to our nation? If so, then GOOD! We all need to pull it together, and fast. We progressives thought we had the ’08 election in the bag. We thought eight horrendous years of George Bush had finally run their course. We believed the politics of fear had finally fizzled. We were all ready to rebuild our nation under the wise leadership of Barack Obama, who would no doubt win in a landslide. Ah, but America is not quite ready to wake up. In the supposed twilight of the neoconservative theocrats, enter Sarah Palin onto the stage of the Republican National Convention — and the nightmare chant returns: “USA! USA! USA!� And now there is a new one, too: “DRILL! BABY, DRILL!� The drunken frat boys have gathered for their fantasy gang rape of the planet. Underneath the extreme nationalism and extreme devotion to team and flag, there is an ugly, violent spirit that still has its fascistic grip on our nation. And it has no plans of releasing us soon. Are Americans as a whole, truly a fearful, war-mongering xenophobic irrational people? I’d like to believe otherwise, but it appears that over half our nation is gearing up to vote for yet another neoconservative, anti-science, anti-gay, anti-choice, pro-war presidency. Are we really going to trade eight years of an adolescent cowboy for a geriatric maverick? The latest polls say yes. And forget reality: The GOP spinmakers are skillfully adept at distorting reality for emotion. And that’s how they’ll win. It won’t matter that Palin is incompetent or that McCain lies. They have skillfully crafted the illusion that they are “just like us.� They are everyday Americans, while we, the amoral “liberal elite,� despise all that is wholesome and good. It’s a strategy designed by none other than Karl Rove. Strengths become weaknesses, weaknesses become strengths, and reality becomes irrelevant. Here is the hard lesson that we all had better figure out fast: This election is NOT in the bag. The inevitability of President Obama is not a sure thing. The far-right Christians are poised and energized for a massive comeback. And Americans are falling for it. Again. For example, the Log Cabin Republicans have endorsed McCain. What a surprise. Attention all queer Republicans: You were cute in the 80s when gay self-loathing was in, but in 2008 you’re just part of the problem. Get therapy, stop hating yourself and start supporting candidates that support you. OES

Ultimately, we must all remember that real change never comes from the top down. Should Barack Obama win (and I hope he does), he won’t be the savior we are looking for. No man or woman is. True change has to come from the bottom up. So as important as the presidency is, we must never lose track of the true work. If we want political change to happen it needs to be right here, in Salt Lake City, along the Wasatch Front, and throughout Utah. No matter who takes the reigns of power in January, we all need to take an active involvement in our home. Don’t let the dominant culture intimidate you. Progressives can and do make a powerful difference here, and you personally can make an impact. Take your fear and frustration and focus it into grassroots work. Are you passionate about queer rights? Volunteer for Equality Utah. Stressed out about our civil liberties being stolen? Give money and time to the ACLU of Utah. Are you worried about threats to our eco systems and environment? Join HEAL Utah, Save our Canyons, Tree Utah, or the Southern Utah Wilderness Alliance. Are you worried that McCain appointees to the Supreme Court may threaten reproductive freedom in America? Get involved with the Planned Parenthood Action Council. Tired of the Utah Legislature? Get involved in local campaigns with candidates you care about. Run for office yourself! Take time off work and go lobby at the capitol. And most importantly, be informed on the issues. Don’t let your conservative brother-in-law stump you with the half-assed “facts� he got from Rush Limbaugh. Educate yourself. Read a variety of news sources. Listen to progressive talk radio and pod casts! Know the issues backward and forward. And a word for all of you gay people who are still hiding in the closet: GET OUT! Let your families know who you are. The most powerful thing queer people can do is to be open, honest and public. Raise your voice. Write op-eds and letters to the editor. Talk to your friends, co-workers and elected leaders. Let them know who you are and what you believe. As children we were all taught the Pledge of Allegiance with its closing phrase, “Liberty and justice for all.� We don’t have that in this country. Not yet. Nevertheless, it is our national birthright. And we must take a stand and demand that all people have access to the American promise. We need to do everything in our power to create a more just, more peaceful and more sustainable civilization. Nothing less than the very survival of our species depends on our active involvement. Q

Take your fear and frustration and focus it into grassroots work.

1 4 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 112 | Sep te mber 25 , 20 0 8


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Literary Issue QSaltLake has received many stories over the years that, while we thought they were excellent writing, we haven’t been able to use because they just didn’t seem to fit in with the magazine. We’ve also always wanted to do a literary issue, but it just never happened. Well ... here it is. We have a great variety of stories, some fictional, some real, all great reads. Grab a coffee or your favorite cocktail, get in a cozy chair and settle into our first literary issue.

Morning

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by Scott Perry

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’m ten, and in the time it takes for the sun to show its face, my eyes open — slowly taking in the landscape of my room. Daydreams begin to take over where last night’s dreams left off and my gaze meanders from wall to ceiling and down the next wall. I study the patterns of woodgrain on the back of my door as though they are cloud formations, I am disappointed that I find the same image every morning. It’s a rabbit — sort of like Harvey, but visible. I focus on every aberration in the paint and plaster and come to rest blankly on the ceiling light fixture. It’s a square dish with a shiny silver nut that holds it in place; flowers and ribbons are etched around the edges of its frosted glass surface. “Doesn’t really fit a boy’s bedroom,”

sheets and blankets, my fetal position coils tighter. I adjust my pillow and wonder why I still wake up alone. Where is the sound of someone coughing? Why isn’t someone clattering in my kitchen? I want desperately to hear these sounds; but at this point in my life, I have to make them myself, which means getting out of bed where the sounds are most comforting. Most familiar. My mind drifts further. It dawns on me that the morning sounds of my childhood contained no conversation. No “good morning,” no “what’s up for today?” There was always a deafening silence at our breakfast table; yet very little peace. I reluctantly roll out of bed and head to the CD rack where Billie Holliday is ready and waiting. The clatter of the coffee grinder jolts my consciousness into place. The air is filled with a duet — Mr. Coffee and Lady Day. The duet becomes a combo as I twang the rubber band from the Tribune. I flip it across the room; sending my wild-eyed cat on a frenzied chase — his claws skitter across the hardwood floor.

I mouth silently, “better in a funeral home.” Ironically, lying inside it in a blanket of dust are the remains of two bugs, who will remain there until a bulb needs replacing. Little by little, our house begins to fill with the sounds of morning. Mom’s slippers make a sandy scratch as she shuffles like a somnambulist to the fridge and gurgles a splash of milk into her glass. She coughs, clears her throat then pulls the rubber band from the Tribune, making it strum like a paper banjo. The chair legs rumble across the linoleum as she settles into her routine. The pop! hiss! of a match ignites her first cigarette of the day. From the far end of the house, my brother’s bedroom door joins in with a clack of its latch and the creak of its hinges. In the kitchen, the magnets of the cupboard door snap open and shut. The sticky seal of the refrigerator door peels apart — releasing a chill into the air. Lucky Charms tinkle as they tumble into David’s cereal bowl. Clink, clink. Cough, cough. It’s morning on Pueblo Street.

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wenty years later, I’m still there but in a different bed, different walls, different home. The daydreams are the same, though. I still scan my room each morning; drawn to the spot on the ceiling where my paint roller missed. A picture on the wall that for some reason refuses to stay straight. Dusty crevasses in the clock radio. I take in the details of my room. But now, I don’t imagine them as other things; I don’t even see them for what they are. I just stare through catatonic eyes and listen for the sounds of morning. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. The only sound is the clock on the kitchen wall. Wrapped in a tangle of

hree hundred miles and many ­mornings down the road, I find myself in the guest bedroom of my parents’ desert home. I awaken to the familiar sounds of Mom. The shuffle, the cough, and the splashing of milk are all the same. She slides open the screen door. It rattles and skids as though it’s aluminum joints are not yet ready for morning. Stepping onto the deck, she lights her morning cigarette. It will be an hour or so before the morning paper arrives. I don’t wallow in bed much anymore. You miss a lot in the confines of an empty bedroom. I throw off the covers, pull on some pants, and step outside with my cup of coffee. The night’s rain has left a puddle on each of the patio chairs, so I lean against a damp wooden railing. A lone grey cloud lingers over Red Mountain. I turn my face to the sunrise and take a swig of morning desert air and watch Mom as she walks out to the brush — flinging a can of birdseed into the clearing. She’s still in her bathrobe. Her slippers are rust-colored from her mornings in the sand. She’ll get dressed eventually. Mornings just last longer in the desert. I slip a CD into the boom box. “Music Appreciation” has become one of our new morning rituals. Barber’s Adagio for Strings leads off today’s playlist and makes us cry every time. Stillness is wonderful, but sensory overload is rapture. One by one — until they number in the dozens — Mom’s birds arrive to the swell of violins. Doves, sparrows, finches, robins and the family of quail. Chirps, coos and the wafting of wings seem to say “Good morning” and “What’s up for today?” Mom laments about how the quail are disappearing lately — probably a coyote. And she’s not going to plant a garden this year — no one ever eats the stuff. I tell her that work is sending me into more panic attacks, and that my friends and I will all be down in a few weeks for our annual Easter Parade. As the music builds, the rabbits join in (they’re always there). They skitter in the dirt like Keystone Kops, then stop. Nose to nose. Frozen for a second. Then they spring so high they flail on the way down — barely sticking their landing. Balanchine bunnies. The CD ends. Mom takes a drag on her smoke and I sip my coffee as we take in the quiet — and the peace.  Q Scott Perry is a graphic designer (for money) and a writer (for fun). His essays have appeared in ­QSaltLake, Catalyst and Salt Lake magazine.

Night Around Me by Eli Shipley

In a parking lot in L.A., ice-cream trucks sleep with their nursery rhymes turned silent, near houses whose barred windows guard those asleep inside. Nearby dyke clubs open; the Pinkbox, Milk; and from the Meow Mix, music seeps, spills out into the street, and the smog feels lower because of the city’s light pollution. I take it through my mouth and skin. Inside spotlights glint off glasses of beer, and I’m drowsing in the haze and fuzz of electric guitars, held by girls with short-cropped hair and tiny bow ties. Between songs, the clink of pool cues against balls pulses as metronomes, and all sounds move deeper in through my chest and arms, thighs, and groin. Later, between those parked trucks, easy as breath, my girl knows I can see myself inside her. Inside her eyes, where she watches me and I become silhouetted and small, simple as the shadow of a tear, a burntout matchstick, candlewick, thorn, a thorn I feel bite into my lip when she kisses me with her teeth. And her eyes close around me. Ely Shipley’s first book of poems, “Boy with Flowers”, won the 2007 Barrow Street Press book prize judged by Carl Phillips, and will be published this October. He is currently a PhD candidate at the University of Utah where he teaches creative writing, literature, and gender studies “Night Around Me” first appeared in Prairie Schooner and appears in “Boy with Flowers.”


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Politics and Art

Holy Cahoots, Jesus Saves!

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he giant golden sphinx leered above me as I stepped into the cavernous, whitetiled station, the wind in my hair as the BART train screeched away from me through the subway tunnel toward Daly City. “King Tut at the DeYoung Museum,� the massive billboard proclaimed. My reason for being in the city today. I stepped onto the escalator, my new maroon bell-bottoms making a satisfying swish as I leaned against the railing, and looked at the museum ticket that my mother had only hours ago decided not to use. She had muttered something about art being for the rich and entitled, and then putted off in her red Volkswagen Beetle, back to her volunteer work at the Oakland Literacy Project, her hip-suburbanwhite-woman-afro crushed against the ceiling of the car. I smiled at my good fortune now as I ascended toward the city to meet my father for the exhibit, out of school for the rest of the day, away from boring homework, away from the elbows and shoves and taunts of my classmates. The distinctive smells of the city surrounded me as the escalator rose to street level: roasting coffee, car exhaust, the ocean. A perfect urban perfume. My ears took in the cacophony of hundreds of tourists mobbing the cable car turnaround at Powell and Market, and the down-and-out San Franciscans trying to make a little cash, playing their guitars, preaching their gospels, or just plain begging. But something else was growing louder, drowning out the usual sounds, a chant, a song. The crowd in the plaza was packed so tightly I couldn’t move past it. I pushed through in the direction of my father’s office, knocking into shoulders and elbows, but there was no getting past the sea of people, so I gave up and drifted, and began to notice the people around me. These were not tourists, but longhaired men and short-haired women in faded jeans and tie-dyed skirts. “Hippies and queers,� my dad would have called them, if he thought my mother wasn’t listening. The chant became much louder, women’s voices, shouting something about children. I was jostled through the crowd to the front of the line, and found myself face to face with an organized horde: women with flat tops, women with afros, women in saris, women in leather jackets. Many had kids with them, and they were waving signs and singing, “Don’t take away, don’t take our children.� The woman directly in front of me waved her sign in my direction, and I read the words, “Lesbians Make Great Mothers.� A boy my age was walking along the front of the crowd handing out flyers. He had long brown hair and John Lennon glasses, and was wearing a red serape. He reached the place where I was standing, and I took the document from his

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hand meeting his gaze for a split second and seeing myself as I could only dream. “The California Legislature Wants to Take Children away From Their Gay Parents,� the flyer read on poorly copied red paper, followed by some jumble about calling your congressperson and standing up for gay and lesbian rights. I looked back into the crowd. The big woman with the “Lesbians� sign was looking at me. She had long blonde hair pulled back in a ponytail and she was wearing a denim dress. She smiled and waved her sign at me. “My son,� she mouthed over the din, and pointed to the

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boy who I’d just taken the flier from, now working his way down the crowd. I smiled back at her and waved my flyer to show her I’d gotten one, and she raised her other hand, the one without a sign, into the air, and clenched it into a fist. I stared into her eyes and I started to raise my hand like hers, but she turned and moved toward another part of the crowd, waving her sign and joining in the song again. I just stood there for a moment, hand raised, fist clenched, confused, yet exhilarated. But my father, the museum. Turning away from the rally, I pushed through the people blocking my way and left the plaza. Traffic buzzed and honked as I walked down to the corner, stepping into the busy street to wait for the light, the red flyer clutched tightly in my hand. As the light changed, I walked across Market, folding the flyer and shoving it in my pocket, dodging businessmen and secretaries rushing back to their offices, the chant still ringing above the street noise. I looked back over my shoulder at the throng of protestors and observers, and made a mental note to tell my father I had come straight from the station. Kent Quaney was raised in the San Francisco Bay Area, but relocated to Salt Lake City with his family during his senior year of high school. He holds a BA in English from Weber State, an MA in English Literature and a Master of Letters in Creative Writing from the University of Sydney, Australia. He has just completed his first novel. He is currently an adjunct professor of English at Westminster College.

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Jack and Sean by Keith Moore

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hat are you going to do about it?” said Sean’s uncle. “You can’t go on like this. Something’s got to be done.” “I’m not going to do anything about it,” Sean said, a touch peevishly. His uncle picked up on that nuance and was disturbed. This whole discussion — this elephantine issue — was now ruining the business trip, the older man reflected. Sean’s problem was getting too monolithic for comfort. It was starting to taint any fun in their relationship — and there used to be so much of that — “fun,” joking, banter, verbal play — but now it was all the problem. Jack was weary of it. Bored, actually — by now. Exasperated. Especially since nothing was changing. Jack Axton regarded boredom life’s worst sin. That stemmed from his “artistic side,” or “bent,” it was called. His business associates, customers, didn’t know much about this side, if at all. Jack Axton was by now at least a regionally known water-colorist — original — a recognizable style he’d worked hard at — and it satisfied connoisseurs and he fetched pretty good money from his landscapes alone. They were abstract, but he made sure “recognizable.” And cityscapes. Jack knew better than to limit his subject matter. But it wasn’t much money. Not an income. The mainstay was still Axton Butcher Supply, a strange, offbeat, and somewhat difficult business his father started, though it eventually made the family a good living. At that, they’d lately had to diversify — to restaurant equipment — in order to keep afloat. When chains wiped out the Ma & Pa grocers Axton Butcher Supply nearly went bellyup too. Jack wasn’t the only one to notice, and to say, it was surely a strange pairing, butcher equipment and watercolors. But

both pursuits kept working. Jack made them work. He was a go-getter, like his father Cedric Axton. Sean Brymer was his sister’s son. They’d long had a natural affinity, these two guys, age difference immaterial. The “afterthought,” at that, Sean was. That was Gloria’s own word. Gloria and Ted Brymer thought they were “through” — she used that word — but along came Sean twelve years later, later than a sister and four brothers, and surprised everybody. Surprised, and altered lifestyles. If Gloria hadn’t loved him so much, and Ted so much, she’d have called herself burdened — in her sixties. Well, hazardously near seventy. The fact is — it was difficult for Gloria Axton Brymer. But her upbringing taught her not to show it. Then when she grew to love the growing-up Sean — well, it was all worth it, every diaper of it. Every other hurdle as they came along. But this new one? In the adult son? Maybe not — maybe not worth it. No, don’t be silly, she told herself, don’t say that, don’t think that — but things were now truly clumsy. Gloria couldn’t deny that to people. It was obvious. It helped a great deal that Ted felt the same, that he had generous love for all of his family, Sean included. (Sean the most? Perhaps.) He had surpassing love for Gloria, never gave another woman a passing glance. He often said in his testimonies at church the thing he depended most on in the church, wanted the most from it, was his prospective eternal life with Gloria, that anything short would be literally hell. She felt likewise, didn’t voice it from the pulpit much, was more a private person than he. Their marriage was the envy of whole wards, whole stakes; they were rare that way. They were respected — but more generally, envied. They were discussing

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this one night, getting ready for bed, and Ted told Gloria, “It’s actually bad, honey. Envy’s a no-no, you know.” Gloria giggled and smiled as he disrobed, set her Ben Franklin reading glasses on the bedstand on a Maeve Binchy novel, and said, “Oh, forget it and just come to bed, I don’t think it’s such a sin. Really, honey.” “What’re we gonna do about Sean?” He hung up his maroon robe. “Ted! Don’t throw that at me at this hour of the night! We can talk about it in the morning. Just come to bed.” She paused. “Your robe fell.” He hung it back up and headed for his side of the bed. “Not sure we can do — much of anything — at this point in time.” She turned sideways on the pillow and looked sad. This must be the fortieth business trip Uncle Jack took him on. They were a famous pair in the family, for those trips, how much they enjoyed each other, seemed to have in common — conversationally — and the “fun,” the silliness, their own peculiar brand. But what the heck? It worked for them. Nobody questioned it. But Sean was twenty-eight now and home from his mission to British Columbia a piling-up number of years, not

married, not dating, and, well, it soon came out why. The why, of course, was Sean’s “problem.” Yes, that’s the political word everyone was now using, and it was obscure, perhaps even carried the weight of denial. Society had become ambiguous about these things, something Jack noticed but Sean didn’t, and didn’t want to. Jack Axton was tired of the pussyfooting. As they headed for St. Anthony to design the new restaurant and help the owner choose what stuff to buy, Jack had “had it” and started to get frank with his favorite nephew. “Look,” he said as he handled the wheel nonchalantly, “it’s half-up.” He meant the Rexburg Temple. “Look. It’s very conspicuous, isn’t it, Sean?”

“They want it to show good from the freeway,” said Sean, in the passenger seat, glaring at the steelwork jadedly. “Don’t be sarcastic.” “Well, look, Jack, they’ve even put a flag on top of the main spire — I mean, while it’s still only an outline — metal scaffold — they want tourists to see how patriotic — how American — we are.” He gripped the steering wheel with a certain new anger and stared ahead at the yellow line with intent. “You’re mixing your pronouns. They. We. When are you going to make up your mind if you’re one of us or not? Hm? Sean? What’s your answer to that?” Sean stared at a great field of potatoes growing. It seemed to his uncle he was looking at them, and not looking, not seeing them, as he waxed a mite sullen. He was a while answering. What was he thinking, Jack wondered. He’d like to know those thoughts — the important ones, the revealing ones. “By the way, Sean, this isn’t a freeway, it’s just a U.S. highway.” The young man turned with a dazed look. “Why are you splitting that hair? Lots of temples do show from freeways. You got my point.”

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hey were just out of Sugar City when Jack wanted to get serious. The urge gnawed till he couldn’t hold back. Sean squirmed, looked at him sidelong. “What is this, the Spanish Inquisition? In Fremont County in the twenty-first century?” He had phantom urges to light up a cigarette. It was a moment like this when he used to. “We’re still in Madison. I just think it’s time to do something,” Jack said, intent on staring at the yellow line, though they had the road practically to themselves. The countryside was serene — Western-horsey-rugged-serene and awesome, pregnant


with hints of the Creation beyond the horizons (even Sean Brymer sat contemplating this phenomenal beauty was made by God and even Sean Brymer liked that). Great stands of pine of that heavy, somber blackgreen were exponential on distant ranges, their details apparent on the nearby hills, and the rocky and gleamy creeks and runoffs were succulent. June was the month here. That Yellowstone look started here. The men mentioned that in warm tones. But it was soon broken. “I’m not going to do anything, Jack. How many times do we have to go over it?� “I’m worried — no, concerned — about your eternal life. I want you with me. So does Lorileene. You’ve always liked her. And she loves you. She’s told me dozens of times. All our kids love you. You surely want to be with Mother and Dad, I’m sure. Your grandparents loved you very much. Have you ever stopped to think — really think — how long eternal life is?� “Of course. It boggles the imagination. Don’t patronize me.� “Of course it boggles. I’m not patronizing — don’t get sharp with me. Please. We don’t have that kind of friendship. I’m saying this out of love, don’t you see that?� “Oh. Tough love?� “You could call it that.� “I don’t want anybody’s tough love —� “Times people need it, Sean. Tough love serves a need, for Pete sakes. And you want to live with the Lord too. Nobody wants to never be able to — to qualify to — associate forever with the Lord.� “Hey, that’s starting to sound like ‘nobody doesn’t like Sara Lee.’� “Listen! Cute — but I’m serious, Sean. Now listen to this. It’s an abomination. In His sight. Right in the Scriptures. Several times. Spoken by the ancient prophets. It’s in Isaiah. Isaiah was one who said it. It’s at the tail end of the Old Testament — Malachi or somebody. Ecclesiastes. It’s clear as a bell in Ecclesiastes. Genesis. It’s there too. And Paul too. Very plain in Corinthians. How about Matthew? I think the twenty-fourth chapter specifies it exactly. Quite clear.� “I was hoping we’d have a trip that wasn’t — a nice trip as always — that wasn’t church. You know, sermons.� “You need some sermons. Who’s going to do it if I don’t? What part of abomination don’t you understand? That’s spelling it out as far as I can see. Hell, Sean. Pardon the French, but this is getting to me. And yes — maybe I mean hell literally. Chew on that. I’m concerned for your salvation. Abomination means the Lord doesn’t like it. Hates it. Doesn’t want it, didn’t plan it, not in the design, not in the plan. Why? To be mean? A party-pooper? No. It’s for our own welfare. Our salvation. Happiness. Eternal, I might add. It’s for our happiness here too —� “I’m happy —� “What, with that Brett person? I don’t think so. And no family? Ever? I don’t think so. Now listen to me, don’t interrupt for a minute.� “You don’t know what I do with Brett —� “I’ve got a suspicion. Listen, Sean, it means it’s frustrating to the Lord. This

frustrates His whole purposes, plans, for us, it’s a slap in His face. I think that’s pretty serious stuff — our Creator? What do you think? Don’t answer right now, I’m not through. It’s against His whole plan, our creation, our souls. Don’t you think that’s pretty serious stuff? Cripes, I do. Don’t you think abomination is a damn good reason?� “Don’t have an accident.� “What? Hit a jackrabbit? Do you see a lot of congestion? I sure don’t.� “All of this is not the point, Jack.� “It isn’t? What is?� “My rights —� “Your rights. What crap. Sophistry. False crap —� “I thought all crap was false —� “Get serious!� “It’s my orientation —� “Oh, that damnable word. Orientation. That’s one of those new ideas of the devil. All this crap is of the devil, Sean, I thought you knew. Lifestyle. That’s another of those mealymouthed trick words of the devil. All these concepts are. They’re excuses — alibis out of all the crap people don’t want to work at, don’t want responsibility for, wanna blame. Blame is how it’s done now. Nothing’s your fault. You — we — people — don’t have to do anything any more, work against any problem, accept any challenge, and, no, don’t give me born with it, I’m sick of that one, and I don’t believe it, I don’t believe you were born with it — or anybody else. You were born with a problem, a challenge, like a lot of others, other kinds. And frankly, I don’t think you pulled the worst, either.� “I know you don’t, and you’re wrong. You’re just wrong, Jack —� “No, I’m not, I’m going by the gospel and the gospel’s never wrong —� “Well, that’s a handy way to live life too, don’t you think, then you’re always right and everything’s always peachy-keen. Right?� “Don’t be snotty. I’ll take it, then. I’ll take it as a handy out, then — over what you’re using for ’em — handy outs. I’ll take the Lord’s side of the line.� “Thank you, George Albert Smith.� “It was Joseph Fielding Smith, Junior, and that’s not the point. Now, do something for me. We’ve got to work now, we’re just about there. Get all those specs out of the briefcase for the Big Bear job and remind me of the big things he’s ordering, I wanna know how many ovens, hoods, filters, heat-lamps, workboards —� “Grills?� “Yes! Grills! I almost forgot. He wants two big ones. See how valuable you are to me? I need their exact measurements, I think he wants four deep-fryers, that’s a lot, and then look at the supplies, I think Johnston’s ordering the complete gamut, and a lot of it, and I need those itemized — here, use that legal pad — on the floor — you’ve got your feet on it — and then tell me — Sean, are you listening? — tell me what exit to take, this thing’s on Bridge and has an entrance on First North, we’ve —continued on page 20

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Jack and Sean Guitars Gibson

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got to go there, used to be a big video store, but that’s not popular here now, people’re getting everything in Rexburg or Idaho Falls, bigger selection, and they can get there fast nowadays, and, listen, I think Johnston’s ordering everything and I want it just right, this is a very big job, we were dang lucky to get it. He could have gone to that big outfit in Missoula and it’s just a dang lucky break for us he didn’t. I hope we have enough hoods. If we don’t we’ll just have to order ’em fast from St. Louis. You know, Apex. Started up in St. Louis over a hundred years ago, Dad knew ’em — personally. Vinson came out here many times. On the train. Became a good friend of Dad’s. Big Jew. All those rich guys back there are. Got quite impressed with the church, almost told Dad he wanted to join. Fine outfit. Make the best stuff in the country in our line. Apex put two Chicago outfits out of business, did you know that? Their stuff was inferior — those Chicago people.” Sean was hustling with the papers, writing things down, when he glanced up

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and said, “I’m not gonna have any more of this — third-degree stuff on this trip — you know, on the way back — or anything — am I?” Jack pulled up and parked the red Honda Civic angle in front of what was becoming the Big Bear. Construction men were bustling now right in front of them, planks and ladders and paint cans awhirl. “There’s Johnston,” he said to his nephew, “right on the button. You got all that done, didn’t you? Great. You did a great job. This is very important to us.” Suddenly as he opened the Honda door he put on a reflective look and said, “Sean, I can’t promise. Sean, if the spirit moves — if the spirit moves — well, do I have to say more?”

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t went well at the Big Bear. DeVard Johnston placed a whopping order. Axton’s would be making several trips back. Johnston came from a family who got rich in potatoes and sugar beets and now he and his old Ricks College buddy Maynard Doman wanted to try the luxury of the restaurant business — but do it big, “right,” or not at all. The Yellowstone traffic would be their shoo-in, they figured, along with what they intended to be the finest of a local reputation. Axton’s was very happy to be in on giving them a boost. The Axtons too had for three decades made a very big point of becoming successful. (Cedric Axton had the year before been interred in one of the most expensive caskets Deseret Mortuary sold.)

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It was barely warm enough for a little plunge when they settled into Motel 6 late that evening. They had to hustle it in at that. The pool closed at ten. Sean Brymer hadn’t liked his uncle’s continued “preaching,” however. Jack Axton had asked him some pretty frank things on their way south and it was obstructing his view of Idaho, which he’d heretofore enjoyed. It was then, leaving the room for the pool, they had their flap over the word “gay.” Just in the hour before, driving down, Jack had said “homosexual” and Sean was quick to say “Gay. It’s gay, Jack. We prefer gay.” (The limit was Sean’s insistence on “gaiety” for “homosexuality” — “Good lord, Sean, gaiety is colored balloons and ice-cream and cake and jitterbugging!” “Oh, we do that too,” Sean riposted.) At one spot — the semaphore at St. Leon Road — Jack had clutched the steering wheel to the point of knuckles whitening and gritted his teeth and said, “I’m not going to use that stupid word, it’s meaningless, and it’s coy, Sean, don’t expect it out of me,” and Sean said, “Now we are going to have an accident, Northgate Mile is congested, “ and then, halted for that infernal red light at Elva Street, Jack snapped,

“I’m not going to converse in euphemisms, Sean, and I’m not going to start saying that sappy word — no! — it doesn’t make me a homophobe — can that one too — that’s the damnedest stupidest word — concept — to come out of the whole damn mess! What a handy alibi — call people homophobe and you’re excused of everything. Automatically. He gripped the wheel and got stuck again at the Lomax Street light and said, with quite a pinched expression now, “Good heck, Sean! I’m also a rattlesnakeo-phobe — and — and — a train-comin’-atme-at-ninety-per-o-phobe!” So it was just after nine-thirty when Sean got into his trunks and they left the room for the pool. Jack was in his trunks too, a towel over his shoulders, when he made the spontaneous mistake of saying, “You’ve got a marvelous physique. I didn’t realize. I’m jealous.” They were going through the door. “And you’re worried about me being gay! Whaddaya think that sounds like comin’ from you?” Jack checked the door again and barked, “Dammit, Sean, it means I noticed you’ve got a dang good physique, why does it mean anything else, frankly, I think you’re obsessed, prepossessed, all you guys ever think about is sex, isn’t it, everything boils down to sex — “ “What! You’re tellin’ me it doesn’t with you?” “Yes, that’s what I’m tellin’ ya. It doesn’t. I’m not thinking about it every minute — and — and — lookin’ at every

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good-lookin’ thing that goes by and — well, undressing ’em — oh, come on, don’t kid me — I’ve got eyes — I’ve watched you — I’ve watched your eyes.” “Well! Hmph,” Sean said, and they went out and it didn’t come up again during the swim. But the swim was quite brief, of course. They were the only people in the pool. “I hate all these lights,” said Jack. “All this light isn’t needed, it’s obscene, ruins the effect of night-time.” “I couldn’t agree more,” said Sean. His maple hair was wet and streaked over his tan forehead. He gazed at the large building. “A Motel 6 can only be in towns of over fifty thousand, Jack.” “I’ve seen ’em in smaller — ” “It’s about that,” Sean said. “They do studies. It’s all calculated.” “Has more to do with driving distances. Especially in the West. I think.” Jack scratched his crotch under the water. Sean wasn’t unaware of how hung Unc was.

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hey were having the marvelous breakfast at Smitty’s Pancake & Steak House on Broadway and Jack Sanka, of course, and he had the politeness to say nothing about Sean’s coffee. It wasn’t coffee that upset Jack Axton. It was “gaiety.” Jack set down his Sanka and said, as they waited for the superb pancakes, “Did she bring us everything, have we got all the flavors of syrup?” and Sean said he thought so, no problem, he used maple only anyway, and then Jack said, “We’re getting a good start. I figure we’ll get to Lewiston in plenty of time to study the Joe’s job and get his order all lined up — properly — and then we ought to get in at a pretty good hour, well before sunset, I’d say.” “Lewiston?” Sean took a swig of iced water, plunked down the glass. Then he tested the coffee for temperature, blew on it. “Joe’s what?” “Joe’s Bar, of course. That’s all it says on the sign, Joe’s. All those towns, Trenton, Richmond, all of ’em, they can’t have the word ‘bar’ in a sign out front.” “What?” He sipped the coffee. It was still too hot. “That’s right, they have to kiss up to the city fathers around there if they wanna do business.” “Who are they kidding?” He tried the coffee again. “You mean Lewiston doesn’t know it’s a bar? —” “They know, Sean. Of course they know. But you’ve got to play your cards right in that country down there. Up here in places, too.” “That’s hypocrisy.” “Of course it is, but if you wanna stay in business —” “And another thing,” and the cup went down onto the saucer with audibility, “who are you kidding, Jack, with kiss up? You’re not allowed to say that, are you?” “Why? What’s wrong with it?” “It’s against the church.” “What? Where is that written?” “It’s a vulgarity, Jack. Quite a serious one.” “Heck, Sean. Who says? I don’t think so.” “They say it, Jack. The authorities.” “Bullshit.” The stacked waitress came with their order, left. “Now see, you didn’t even glance at her — chest — did you?” “Chest? I thought you said you didn’t speak in euphemisms.” Little more came up to displease Sean Brymer for quite a few miles, hours; in fact, they discussed modern poetry —continued on page 22


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Jack and Sean —continued from page 21

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through three counties starting with B, Bonneville, Bingham, Bannock, but then Sean was a bit disturbed because his uncle brought up something a bit more annoying than sexuality. Work. Life’s career. Plans. That fearsome, sandpaper crap he hated. Sean gazed at the volcanic cones way off to the west, remarked on the haze around them, how far away they looked from I-15, and how exciting it was when you actually drove there and saw them close-up. And they both remarked on the beautiful green fields west of the freeway, all that summer loveliness north of Chubbuck, the way the land swoops down in green and misty and hay-smell folds and drifts out way west and beyond, engendering veritable excitement in the fact of the West, the exact normality of this state, and how the nice warm sun floods it, the good arid feeling, and they remarked on the sunflowers, and Sean quipped (though Jack took it as firmer than a quip), “What would your business buddies think of your noticing sunflowers, Unc? Frankly, you’re making me a bit — uncomfortable.” They took good grins at each other. Sean was thinking he was home-free. But right after Red Rock Pass Jack got on it again and it lasted to the state line. “Because it’s sophistry, Sean. Political sophistry. Every civilization has gone under — that’s — what? — honored it — put it on a pedestal. Sean, it’s not homosexuality itself — sodomy — and there’s one — the first — that went down with it — hence the word — but political love, acceptance —” “Crap. That’s crap, Jack. Hell, we’re taking over. Get used to it.” “I will not. That’s the very sophistry I’m talking about. No, don’t tie it in with race, that’s the biggest crap of all. It’s not race. It’s not the same as pigmentation! Nothing like it! That you’re born with — you are born with — and you can do nothing about it. Do nothing, Sean. That — pigmentation, Sean — is not the same as a problem, a challenge —” “Oh yes it is, have you talked to any — minorities?” “You’re missing my point. Homosexuality, Sean, is a problem, challenge, one of the many ways we can come into this world with a — a hurdle — a thing we’ve got to conquer — expected to overcome, master — somehow — like, well, missing limbs, blindness, what? Down’s syndrome. Cerebral palsy. I don’t know why we have these things, Sean, but — the gospel sort of teaches it’s a — an assigned problem — we might have had it assigned in our pre-life. And how we conquer it, or manage it, what we make of it, is our test, it’s why we’re here — and, frankly, you’re expected to do something about homosexual yearnings too. They’re simply not natural, they’re a kick in the face of God, His plan for you, and you’re expected to conquer it. Like — well, have you noticed Earl? How Earl lives his life —” “Oh, you mean like a little old maid, with cats, and that prissy lemon face he wears all the time and has no life?” “He’s perfectly content as a concert pianist — and successful at it — and his teaching — and happy, from all I can see.” “That’s the trouble — you can’t see it all. Hell. What’s he doing with his life? Besides that. I mean, his private life — personal — is that what you want for me, for all of us, wither up like little old-maid

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prunes and — never know the pleasure of the physical side of life, sexual, what it is to be devoted to a partner — him devoted to you — and all that implies?” “That’s what’s wrong, Sean. It implies too much.” “Well, I’m not going to be an Earl. Crap. You call that living? Happiness? Don’t you know gay couples can adopt — kids who’d have no other life — they give us lots of Afros, Hispanics, all kinds of minorities white people don’t want — they’re easy to adopt — and so are Caucasians in some cases — and cripes, Jack, isn’t that a better way to live, aren’t you doing more, more real, noble good on this earth — making someone else happy, a life for someone else — who otherwise wouldn’t have a chance, any chance? —” “No. No good can come of two parents of the same sex. It’s absurd. And very wrong. And very damaging to any child.” “Bull.” “What percentage of fags adopt? Dykes?” “Don’t use those words! Those — epithets! That’s prejudice — homophobia! See, how can we get to first base on anything with that attitude? —” “What percentage?” “It’s not many —” “That’s what I mean. Sean, it’s a selfish world, you people, self-centered, superficial, wrong. Temporal and temporary —” “Gay couples are together as long as lots of straights —” “Don’t use that sappy word, straights is the sappiest word to come out of the whole thing. Sean, this is not sexual. It’s societal. It has to do with the goodness and the — fiber — and the whole cast of a society, culture, nation. You put this thing on a pedestal, and you start making laws that tell you you have to love it and honor it, and they get all their selfish little rights — hell, you can see from those Gay Pride parades they’re a bunch of fools, sponsored by the devil — hell, Sean — that’s all ugliness and folly — and all ugliness and folly — and monotony — is of the devil — that’s his whole m.o., it’s all he knows. And now we’ve got politicians, Washington, D.C., everybody in power, tellin’ us we’ve got to love ’em and give ’em their sweet little rights — it’s no different from being a Negro — well, it is different, plenty different, it’s a problem and you work it out, you conquer it, you overcome it somehow, you live your life celibate —” “No, Jack, that’s what’s of the devil, how the cripes you gonna expect people to do that? And it’s not ‘Negro’ any more, where have you been? Now I think you’re being the foolish one in this. Crap. People can’t live celibate.” “They can and they do. They sublimate —” “Oh! Sublimate! You talk about dirty words!” “And don’t give me that junk about we’re not hurting anybody, not harming, what we do in the bedroom is our business and it’s not affecting you or changing your life in the least bit. It is. That’s all a fallacy — a huge fallacy of sophistry — and politics. It affects everybody. The whole country. The nation. It eats away at the fiber of the nation. It’s a cancer. A socially approved cancer. Terminal. It drops all standards. It even promotes crime and corruption —” “Come on! —” “Doesn’t seem like it to you, I know, don’t I know it, but it does, it’s destroying the nation — and that’s treason — and frankly I think you should be mad at yourself for being part of it. Don’t worry, that’s

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all I’m going to say. I’ve had this coming a long time. I’ve known a long time we can’t go on talking small talk on these trips. I’m not a superficial person. Not forever, Sean. I don’t want you destroying your life. This one — and the forever one to come. There’s something you can do about this. I didn’t say it’s easy. It’s not. It’s very very hard. But do it. Start. Make a start. That’s all. And I don’t mean stay with Brett Dahl, either. Or any other guy. He’s not good for you. I’ve seen that all along.” “I can’t discuss it any more, Jack. I’m exhausted.” “Please put that back up. You don’t need it, you’re not driving. I can’t stand the visors lowered, it loosens them forever. Detroit’s never figured that out yet. They give us every blasted detail under the sun but they’ve never made a car where the visors stay tight once they’re used. Just one use loosens ’em permanently. I drive with the sun in my eyes because of that and there’s no reason a passenger ever needs one. Women! Every woman I have in the car yanks down that visor — even if it’s for a minute or two — on a cloudy day — and it’s never the same.” “You’ve never had a man that did?” “Didn’t say that. Them too. Women don’t have a monopoly on shit.” “That’d make a good title, for an article in Ensign, ‘Women Don’t Have a Monopoly on Shit’ by Brother Jack Axton.” “Genuinely cute, Sean, now shutup and listen. And while we’re on it, please take that stuff off the dashboard. Papers and junk reflect in the windshield. I keep the dashboard pristine. I can’t stand a mug or utensils or stuff up there. Reflections are distracting and cause accidents. A heck of a lot of people don’t care and have crap on the dashboard all the time. Most people’s look like Fibber McGee and Molly’s closet. I can’t stand so much as a toothpick up there. And no coins. I hate coins strewn around. Now, that’s where I’m not like my sex, Sean, I can’t stomach the way men slop coins around on every surface there is. I can’t stand them on a bureau drawer or a table in the house. Coins are filthy. People have them out around food. I can’t stand that. Ballpoint pens are filthy too, I can’t stand them around food either. Oh, and rubber bands! Used rubber bands! Don’t get a used rubber band anywhere near me. They’re the filthiest things on earth.” “You’ve got enough hangups you could be gay — did you know that?” “Are you picking your nose?” “No! I’m scratching it. Even if I were, so what?” “I don’t want a bugger in the car.” “Now — I could make a joke —” “Don’t. Not funny … McGee.” “Did you know men can touch their noses on TV? Women can’t. Carson, Leno, Letterman, Tom Cruise, all the gorgeous actors and celebs — they can touch their nose — but women can’t, they can touch their neck or ears or their hair, but never the nose — it’s gross — unladylike. But with men it’s macho — as long as it never approaches picking — that’d kill ’em, of course. A good example is Alec Baldwin, he’s a big nosetoucher and gets away with it. Women think it’s sexy. But he has an extremely hairy chest too. He’s bared it on ‘Saturday Night Live.’ It looks like a thick sweater.” “You do too, don’t you? Think it’s sexy.” “When did I say that? Give me some credit, Unc.”

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hey spent half an hour at Joe’s. Joe Pitcher gave them another big order, new countertops, bar stools, booths, all the small stuff — glasses, silverware, all of

it. It was a profitable stop and Jack Axton was happy for it and so was Sean Brymer, obliquely, he knew where his bread was buttered, and the sun was slanting and would soon be shimmery on Willard Bay, a thing they always enjoyed together. “You’ve let me have my little say,” he said from the passenger seat — it was Sean’s turn to drive. “I appreciate it more than I can tell you. You’re a good person, Sean — uh-uh, no! That’s not patronizing, I mean it! Listen to me. That’s the very reason I had to say it — ‘cause you’re a good person. One of the best I know. Don’t say it. Don’t say anything. Just let me tell you that, you need to know that, too — “ “Okay, but did you have to get on me again about a living? I’m going to stay at the library — forever, probably — and Brett’s got his beauty parlor on Cactus Street and it’s doing fine —” ‘If times get bad, if we have a disaster, or another depression, I mean a real one, you need to be in something where there’s a need. You need to be in the food or funeral business, they’re dependable. If times get rough, and they’re going to, the first thing to go’ll be reading, and the second’ll be hairdressing.” Why did he have to get on this annoying, sandpaper subject that was ruining the trip, he thought. He was so insecure about it himself that he couldn’t stand anyone else bringing it up. “I’m too old to go back for a degree, Jack — and too broke, I haven’t got the money —” “You’re not too old, definitely not too old, and what if I put up the money?” “I’d never expect that, and I wouldn’t accept it if you did, that’s too humiliating —” “It’s not humiliating in the least degree, and I’m going to. It’s settled. Get ready to register this fall.” “What!” He stared at him and then quickly at the railroad tracks marking the south end of Logan. A farmer had a load of hay right there, horsedrawn, and they remarked on that happily. The Wellsville Range brooded as always. “The money? Is it conditional?” “Don’t insult me! It’s unconditional. Look — he nearly nipped us, what an ass. That’s the advantage of a red car, people see you. I do admire your driving. You’ve got your wits about you all the time, I’ve noticed. Conditional? Listen, you know me better than that. I want you settled into a decent career — that’ll support you — that’s secure. Libraries can fold any minute. I promise to lay off this topic the rest of the way, as soon as we hit the Wasatch Front. I had to say it — north of the mountains — and that’s where we’ll leave it. Okay?” He was deft at the wheel, actually a calmer driver than his uncle. He glanced over with a smile. “I don’t suppose I could get the — grace mileage of no more than after Mantua Reservoir, could I?” “Grace miles? Interesting. Okay. I’ll tell you what. I’ll go you one better. I promise no more talk of it after Sherwood Forest.” “Sherwood Hills.” Jack screwed up his mouth, almost winked, turned to him and said, “You got my point.” “Touché,” Sean replied. “Do you think we’ll still be friends after this trip?” “I don’t let things cut off friendship, Sean. It’d have to be something — pretty — damn — bad.” “You think I’m bad.” “Absurd! Not in a million years. Get that out of your head. It doesn’t matter whether you make any changes or not — you probably won’t — woops, sorry to say it, not positive of me — I retract it — but I had to

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say it this trip, Sean. I want to thank you for letting me. Putting up with me. You’re too valuable, important, to let it go unsaid. You can cut me out of your life now, or not, or whether whatever —” “You’ve said enough, Jack, now don’t insult me, I’m never cutting you out. And we won’t mention any of it — the family, I mean.” “Sean. I think the family pretty much got the picture the day you staged that ceremony. With Brett Dahl.” “We didn’t invite anybody to that.” “Oh — true — but you think they didn’t get the picture? They’re that stupid? You live together. In that cruddy apartment on Third Avenue. You think people are blind? How do you hide an elephant?” “We’re making it uncruddy, Jack.” “Well, bully!”

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hen Sean walked in Brett said, “How’d it go?” “Pour me a drink, just pour me a drink, quick. I’m shot. I don’t think I’m ready to talk about any of it.”

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orileene put the plate on the table and said, “It’s the meatloaf warmed over and I hope that won’t bother you tonight, Jack —” “Don’t be ridiculous, honey, I love it.” “How’d it go?” “Huge success. We got two big orders in the bag — Big Bear and Joe’s — best trip I’ve made in years. And I got it all said to Sean too, that’s a load off my back —” “Think it’ll do any good? — here, I’ll warm up that Pero, hand me your cup.” “It might. I really think so — this time. I offered to put him into college in September.” “Can we afford that, dear?” “I think we can — this time. I’m going to

...Lands! I’m giving all my

give it a try.” She sat with him and had a cup of Pero herself. “By the way, I went over your head while you were gone and lined you up to hang at the Kimball in August —” “You did what! How dare you —” “Sibylla called and reminded me you haven’t had a show up there in four years —” “There’s nothing to show, Leene, I haven’t done anything new in years — what the heck? —” “What about The Back of Timpanogos, that’s new and it’s terrific, and you’ve got a lot of new abstracts, you saw how popular your abstracts were the last time up there — Jack! People in Park City have got money, you know that. You don’t seem to remember your last show brought in three thousand.” He plunked down his cup noisily. “You committed me to a show in August? To Sibylla? That’s a death sentence. Cripes, you can’t worm out of anything with that woman.” “I think you can make five thousand this year.” “This is quite tasty, what were you worried about, hon?” “I added a braised onion.” “Of course. That’s the difference, Leene. Of course.” “A red one.” “No wonder, Lorileene. Delicious.”  Q

Keith Moore is a graduate of the University of Utah, where he majored in music and English. He served two years in the military as stenographer to Seventh Army Headquarters at Stuttgart. He has taught English at College of Eastern Utah and at Utah State University. He has taught piano and worked on a body of fiction and poetry for several decades, with a variety of publications.

on ix D . S ie t t o D r e t is S -

tithing to fight Prop 8 in California... AND ta suppart my favorite radio station KRCL. I hope you’ll join me!

Fall Radio-athon!


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The Art of Performance by Kent Quaney

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THIS MONTH: SEPTEMBER 26!

o what do you do for a living?” Brendan leaned back against the bar, surprised by the personal question. The asker of the question, a shirtless muscle-head named Jack, had been babbling on for the last twenty minutes about the tragic demise of the leather scene in the newly integrated San Francisco. “I’m an arts reporter for the Chronicle.” Jack raised an eyebrow. “Really. That must be fun, to do something so frivolous.” Brendan frowned at the other man’s word choice. Frivolous? Really? Careful there, buddy. He took a sip of beer as he surveyed the

crowd. It was slim, even for a Monday. A few heavier-set guys surrounded the pool table, a handful of older men sat at the bar, and a group of shirtless troublemakers in their twenties were in a huddle in the corner doing God knows what. This guy was pretty much his only option. He kept his thoughts to himself. “I’m a clinical psychologist. I have a couples therapy practice in the Castro,” Jack said. “I specifically work with couples who are experimenting with dominance and submission, helping them to establish healthy sexual interactions and to have the courage to own their needs and their lifestyle publicly.” He paused and smiled at Brendan, waiting for some praise or acknowledgement. Brendan nodded but said nothing. “I do S & M performance art as well,” Jack continued. Brendan was just drunk enough that he spit beer trying to hold in a laugh. “Seriously?” Jack leaned back and made a show of wiping off his muscular chest. “Sorry man.” Brendan wiped his mouth on the front of his t-shirt and shrugged. “What the hell is S & M performance art?” Watch it, O’Brien, piss him off and you’re not going to get laid. The man rose from his seat, his face flushed. “It’s a celebration of the exchange of sexual power and energy,” he said, his eyes narrowing slightly. Oh Lord, is this guy for real? “I’ve done a show at Dore Alley for several years now. I get whipped and bled while tied with torn American flags. It’s

very intense and inspiring.” Great, another attention-seeking San Francisco dip-shit. “Um, sounds interesting.” “It is interesting, very, but I’m wondering if this is really your scene. I’d like you to come over, Brendan, but only if you’re going to be enrolled in being absolutely dominant and verbal, and fucking me in the sling. That, and you have to assure me that you won’t come for at least an hour.” Brendan shook his head, holding his hands up innocently, and pulled out his usual last defense, his boozy, gosh-golly frat boy grin and mumble. “I’m not so good at memorizing lines or fucking standing up,” he said. “Why can’t we just get naked and see what happens?” He leaned in conspiratorially and put his hand on Jack’s arm. “I’m sorry, but I have to be assured that my needs are going to be met.” Jack’s eyes grew wider with insistence, and Brendan felt the muscle in his forearm tense up. “I assure you you’ll have a good time of course,” he added. Brendan looked at the guy’s ripped body, and thought through the situation. He chuckled to himself again. Oh Jesus, this is too much. “I’m not so sure about that,” he said, taking his hand off Jack’s arm. “Seems I’ll be too distracted by the script and the rules to have a good time. I think I’m going to have to take a pass.” He took another drink and watched Jack’s eyes narrow again. Oh what the hell, let him have it. He continued. “You know, maybe you should chill out with all the crazy specifics and just learn to relax. You might have a little bit better luck in these situations.” “Are you calling me crazy?” Jack’s eyes bugged out like the resident of an asylum. “You know, I have a serious issue with your attitude. Forgive me for owning my sexual energy and being unafraid to state my needs.” His arms were folded across his chest now, his chin held higher than it was a moment ago. “By that you mean being unafraid to demand that we only do what you want to do? The hell with me?” Brendan asked. “That’s not what I’m saying.” “Sure sounds like it to me.” Brendan chugged the last half of his beer down, slightly gagging on the warm backwash, and stood up. “Good luck with your S & M dancing, then.” He slammed the bottle down onto the bar. “It’s performance, not dancing!” Jack shouted at him, clearly not ready to see any humor in his claims of artistry. “Of course.” Brendan enjoyed seeing the other man’s face grow red and frustrated. The Bay Area was full of over-earnest dip-shits, and this guy was no different. Picking them off was too easy. San Francisco was getting boring. He turned and walked toward the bathroom. This is a chapter from Kent Quaney’s recently completed first novel, “The Last Bonfire,” the story of a self-styled punk rock outsider navigating the treacherous waters of the gay community in San Francisco. Kent holds a BA in English from Weber State, an MA in English Literature and a Master of Letters in Creative Writing from the University of Sydney, Australia.

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Coming Out by JoSelle Vanderhooft

Coming out is not a tableau. The closet where I hid among the sweaters does not burst into feathered orange flames as if life were a Frida Kahlo painting. There is no single moment when I crossed the threshold into the light eyes squinted, hair thrown back against the wind, free from Plato’s Cave at last. That stifling architecture follows me, hot breath on my neck at midnight, sweat along my fate lines every time I shake new hands hello. Rusty hinges flutter through my ribs just below my collar bone, and I scream out of burning dreams. The new moon peers through my window, resting on my shoulders like a cloak as I remember: the closet is a sneaky, hungry thing, mouth wider than a suicide, teeth sharp as hell and ignorance. Even when you’re free, it growls from the foyer ready to snap you back into the lies and the terror and disgust of lying. Sometimes I have to brace myself against its lintels so the world, its politics and fears won’t shove me back in and lock the door. Sometimes, I think it will. From “The Memory Palace,” a poetry memoir forthcoming from Norilana Books Jan. 1, 2009.

Transgendered Teens on D.C. Street by Eli Shipley August 12, 2002 for Stephanie Thomas and Ukea Davis

That night they lay huddled as if in sleep inside a car. Corner gas station. Out for cigarettes. It looked as if their heart—singular, shared, and too big for either chest, burst. Blood at first sat in spots, buttons sewn across a blouse, sudden and undone. Each shot more than ten times in the face. I believe the undiscovered assailant could not bear their bodies the way they must. All their life lived inside a ghetto within a ghetto. If only I could be just a passerby on their street, glancing up at their brownstone porch, not down at their shared headstone, and listen to a scrap of laughter over traffic, heat, and what they might have been saying to each other above the everyday and through exhaled smoke. “Transgender Teens on D.C. Street, August 12, 2002” appears in Boy with Flowers.

Moth

by Ryan Hollist

I watched a moth try to escape through my bedroom window. In an instinct driven frenzy, it battered the curtain, seeking sunlight – its wings furiously flapping like a tiny, awkward hummingbird. Hours later it sits on the curtain rod – a drab colored butterfly flexing its wings – resting, waiting to try its futile efforts again. Ryan Hollist began feeling the need to write just before turning 26 when he began exploring who he is and what he has experienced. At 28, he is still working it out. He is not sure who is more surprised: accounting instructors when they learn of his writing or English instructors when they learn he is an accounting major.

Heartbroken Insomnia by Ryan Hollist

I spend the sleepless nights remembering How holding you in my arms felt the best, Hearts together as I lay on your chest. I never thought there would be an ending. But you chose another life for yourself, “I love you” was more than you could handle. Avoiding malice or any scandal, You took your things and left me to myself. This insomnia turns my mind to stone, I cannot stand to face our bed alone.

Sep te mber 25 , 20 08  |  issue 112  |  QSa lt L a k e  |  25


Save the Date

Q Arts The Gay Agenda

Major Events of the Community october 10–12

Remembering Giants: Judy, Bing and Sammy

SLC GayBowl VIII mwffl.org october 11

by Tony Hobday

In honor of QSaltLake’s first literary issue I’d like to share a short poem with you: Ashes to ashes, Dust to dust — If it weren’t for boys, our dicks would rust. Of course when we would recite as kids around the campfire, it was gender-different, but my version packs more of a punch, don’t you think?

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THURSday — Ririe-Woodbury Dance commemorates its 45th Anniversary with TOWER, a newly reconstructed work by theatre wizard Alwin Nikolais. This brilliant multi-media dance, created in 1965, uses architectural elements to form a microcosm of society and is notable for the incessant, often hilarious verbal commentary by the dancers. Said to be an “indictment of the American babble,” Tower is “fast, funny and evocative.” 7:30pm, through Sunday, Jeanne Wagner Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. Broadway. Tickets $30, 355-ARTS or arttix.org.

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live orchestra, now’s your chance to be “over the rainbow.”

8pm, through Saturday, Abravanel Hall, 123 W. South Temple. Tickets $27–58, 355-ARTS or arttix. org.

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SATURDAY — Having grown up in the Catskills, Gavin ­Degraw’s tempered backwoods/ trucker look makes him all that more sexy. The 31-year-old singer-songwriter has wooed many with his pop-rock hits including “Chariot,” “I Don’t Want To Be” and more recently “In Love With A Girl.” 7:30pm, Murray Super Theater, 4916 S. State Street. Tickets $17, 467-8499 or smithstix.com.

Q Sugar Space Studio for the Arts is a multidisciplinary arts center that seeks to present and produce innovative dance, theater and visual arts while creating programs that support the development of the next generation of creators and independent thinkers. But they also just want to have a good time — hence, Barefoot Boogie, a community dance with no agenda. Damn! This isn’t an underground protest in a rural Utah silo? Where’s the justice? 7–9pm, Sugar Space, 616 E. 2190 South. Donation $5–20, voluntary sliding scale, thesugarspace. com.

FRiDAY — Utah’s only improvisational dance company, Movement Forum presents Zodiac Tattoo. Performers consider the meaning and myths of zodiac signs and horoscopes to explore aspects of human behavior and relationships. Audience members may witness moments of tenderness, sarcasm, poignancy, foolishness and enlightenment. Watch Movement Forum transform an ordinary dance concert into a one-of-a-kind experience through skill and spontaneity.

7:30pm, through Saturday, Black Box Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. Broadway. Tickets $12, 355ARTS or arttix.org.

Q Join the Utah Symphony on a trip down memory lane as they accompany live multimedia performances of Judy Garland in concert. She’s one of the biggest historic gay icons since her stint as Dorothy in the 1939 version of The Wizard of Oz, and if you thought you would never hear Judy perform with a

26  |  QSa lt L a k e  |  issue 112  |  Sep te mber 25 , 20 08

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SUNDAY — The history of HIV/AIDS in America is chronicled in A Lullaby for Ryan. Sponsored by PWACU, this solo performance by Jade Esteban Estrada accounts stories of courage, strength and human triumph. Characters include “Boobs” aka the Bubonic Plague, Jimmy, a real estate agent in New York in 1981, movie star Rock Hudson, Miss Protease Inhibitor 1996, Bill McPhil, a Texan cowboy and LaShonda Johnson, a housewife in south side Chicago. 2pm, South Valley Unitarian Universalist Center, 6876 S. Highand Drive. Tickets $20, 484-2205 or pwacu.org.

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THURSDAY — Since this is our Literary Issue, I thought I’d include the Community Writing Center’s Haiku Event, which includes readings from the Haiku-A-Thon Contest winners, a guest speaker and a silent auction. You all know Haikus — Japanese style poems — Of five-seven-five. Did I do that right? 6:30pm, The Art Barn, 54 S. 1325 East. Tickets $10–20, 957-4992.

Q The University of Utah’s Performing Dance Company presents their Fall Concert. The performance dives into the

Coming Out Day Breakfast utahpridecenter.org october 20–24 UofU LGBT Pride Week sa.utah.edu/lgbt december 12–14 Salt Lake Men’s Choir Holiday Concert saltlakemenschoir.org january 7–11, 2009 Utah Gay & Lesbian Ski Week, Park City ­ gayskiing.org january 15–25, 2009 Sundance Film Festival, Park City ­ sundance.org June 6–7, 2009 Utah Pride ­ utahpride.org June 20, 2009 HRC Utah Gala ­ hrcutah.org July 24–26, 2009 Utah Bear Ruckus utahbears.com Email arts@­qsaltlake.com for consideration to be included in Save the Date.


complexities of being human — both in solitude and within our desire to connect to others. The evening will be filled with visceral works created by faculty members Abby Fiat and Eric Handman and guest choreographers Gabri Christa and Charlotte BoyeChristensen. 7:30pm, through Oct. 11, Marriott Center for Dance, 330 S. 1500 East, UofU. Tickets $7–10, 581-7100 or dance.utah.edu.

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FRIDAY — Returning to the 1940s (when many of the choir members were born), the Salt Lake Men’s Choir performs the music of Duke Ellington, Bing Crosby, Andrew Sisters and more live from the ­Starlight Ballroom. Everything from camp to torch, folk to swing, these talented, energized and truly “spring chicken” babes will have you “swinging” something in the wind. 1940s attire encouraged. 7:30pm, King Art Center, 720 S. 1580 East. Tickets $25, 913-7893 or saltlakemenschoir.org.

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SATURDAY — There’s no better place to be if you’re looking for some hot blonde lesbians in dirndl skirts and playful on beer than sWerve’s annual Oktoberfest. This is one of the most anticpated fundraising parties of the year, so don’t miss it. The 2009 scholarship recipient will also be announced. 7pm, Utah Pride Center, 361 N. 300 West. Tickets $7 or 3 for $15, 539-8800.

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TUESDAY — From what I understand this tethered threeway was more than just a friendly bond, but hanging out with Shirley Maclaine a lot would probably make just about anyone hop the fence a time or two. Anyhoo, The Rat Pack returns to the Sands Hotel where the big band is swinging, and those gorgeous Burelli Sisters are singing, and of course Martin, Sinatra and Davis Jr. bring their inimitable magic to the finest music ever recorded. 7:30pm, through Oct. 12, Kingsbury Hall, 1395 E. Presidents Circle, UofU. Tickets $25–52.50, 5817100 or kingtix.com.

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WednesDAY — Westminster Theatre Department presents Hands of Sodom, a psychological drama and ‘work-in-progress’ that deals with what it’s like to come out as lesbian in Mormon culture. In two acts, the story examines the experience of being lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender or questioning in a religious culture and aims to awaken people’s minds about the choices they make and the thoughts they have in relation to LGBTQs. 7:30pm, through Oct. 11, Dumke Student Theatre, Westminster College, 1840 S. 1300 East. Free, westminstercollege.edu/culturalevents.

UPCOMING EVENTS

OCT. 20 David Sedaris, Abravanel Hall OCT. 28 Jason Mraz, E Center Nov. 16 One Republic, Las Vegas Nov. 21 Celine Dion, ES Arena Nov. 22 Coldplay, ES Arena JAN. 9 Suzanne Westenhoefer, Rose Wagner

Beauty Lies in the Eye of the ‘Pageant’ By Tony Hobday

“It is our intent that the contestants in the Miss Glamouresse Pageant be played by men because women wouldn’t do it the same way.” This note from playwrights Bill Russell and Frank Kelly is certainly undeniable because if the roles in Pageant were played by women, it would just be the same ear-bleeding boredom of watching Miss America, Miss Universe, Miss Earth, Miss Teen, Miss Milky Way, Miss Sweetheart USA, Miss Grand Junction, Colo. or World Queen of Banana (yes, in Ecuador) contests live. Egyptian Theatre Company’s production of Pageant opens at the Miss Glamouresse 2008 regional finals — six contestants remain: Miss Texas, Miss Deep South, Miss West Coast, Miss Bible Belt, Miss Great Plains and Miss Industrial Northeast but only one can win ... well, at least for one night. During each nightly performance a new winner is crowned Miss Glamouresse by unwitting audience members. The “ladies” are put through rounds of rigorous competition including the allimportant “how do my TNA look” swimsuit competition. However, unlike most “real” beauty pageants, the contestants for Miss Glamouresse have less cumbersome talents ... except for maybe Miss Bible Belt (Wayne Burton) ... her talent’s about as inspiring as the Bible. Crowd favorite, the robust Miss Texas (Doug W. Irey) looks good on a hobby horse and handles a gun like Dick Cheney. Miss Industrial Northeast (Jacob Johnson), a latina with a name seemingly as long as what’s under her skirt, plays a mean accordian. Miss Deep South’s (Dallin Garber) deep southern

drawl adds fuel to the fire of her hysterically funny ventriloquist act. Unfortunately what is cumbersome about Pageant is the awkwardly staged beauty product endorsements. Although such endorsements are pivotal to the success of “real” male-dominating beauty pageants, Pageant’s satirical jabs are slightly ill-humored. Endorsing a large designer bottle of perfume (for bigger ladies) that Barbara Eden could comfortably live in is a bit juvenile, ignorant and in bad taste. Phillip R. Lowe once again pinpoints the perfect costumes. From dull one-piece swimsuits and cover ups with just enough sheerness to make you strain your eye to fabulously tasteless gowns not worn since The Lawrence Welk Show, Lowe truly knows his stuff. Kudos to director Kirstie Gulick Rosen-

Salt Lake Men’s Choir Live at the Starlight Ballroom Salt Lake Men’s Choir takes to a whole new stage Oct. 3 and returns to the ’40s for its annual fall benefit concert. “Few people know that Rowland Hall-St. Marks School has a campus up on Guardsman Way,” said choir president Wesley Brady. “It has a beautiful art center with panoramic windows and patio overlooking the valley. It’s the perfect setting for this evening.” “SLMC Live from the Starlight Ballroom” will start out with a jazz trio out on the plaza as the sun sets and the city lights come up. Light fare and your “beverage of choice” are included in your ticket price as the growing choir attempts to loosen you up to possibly help them raise funds for necessary items, such as new risers, through a raffle. The show then moves inside for a performance by the choir of a fun variety of songs, from camp to torch, folk to swing. Songs by Duke Ellington, traditional folk songs, and a comedic vocal version of the William Tell Overture will likely delight the audience. The group’s small ensemble, Guys Like

Us, will perform “Hit Me with a Hot Note” and “Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy.” “You’re going to love this show,” said the choir’s artistic director, Dennis McCracken. “The ’40s had its own style, its own rhythm. The choir is enjoying the challenge of swing and blues and jive.” The choir will also be joined by Sweet Adelines’ Beth Bruce, whose beautiful tenor voice has won her many vocalist awards, both in barbershop quartets and as a soloist. She is also in the Mountain Jubilee Chorus and the Cathedral Chorus of First Baptist Church. “Beth is a treasure,” said McCracken. “She has assisted the choir for the past few years and the audience is going to adore her.” Salt Lake Men’s Choir Live at the Starlight Ballroom takes place Friday, October 3 at 7:30pm at the King Art Center, 720 S. Guardsman Way (1580 East). Tickets are $25 and include light fare and your favorite beverage. They are available by calling Garrett Smuin at 801-913-7893 or by visiting ­saltlakemenschoir.org.

field for really understanding the ins and outs of beauty pageants. She not only senses the two-faced contestants’ motives, but she also captures the eerie essence of old cronie beauty pageant hosts. Frankie Cavalier (played disgustingly well by Jason Tatom) is sexist, sheepish and constantly salivating. Rosenfield also knows when the contest should be over — in less than 90 minutes, Miss Glamouresse 2008 is crowned, and while the contestants are entertaining and the contest is adequately ridiculous and satirical, there’s only so much woman a man can take, even if the woman is really a man. Pageant runs through Oct. 18 at the Egyptian Theatre, 328 Main Street, Park City. Tickets $16–34, call 435-649-9371 or visit parkcityshows. com.

GayBowl8 Events Oct. 5th Pep Rally & Fashion Show Trolley Square, 4–7PM Oct. 9th Registration Mixer Port O’Call, Event Pass required for free entrance or membership Oct. 10th Gay Bowl VIII Party Club Sound*, Event Pass honored from 9–10:30pm only for free entrance or membership Oct. 11th Gay Bowl VIII Party Babylon*, Event Pass required for free entrance or membership Oct. 12th Championship game at Murray Field, 1:30pm Oct. 12th Awards Dinner at Rice Eccles, followed by party at Trolley Sq., Event Pass required for free entrance only! *PRIVATE CLUBS FOR MEMBERS

Sep te mber 25 , 20 08  |  issue 112  |  QSa lt L a k e  |  27


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Review Desert Star’s ‘Scary Poppins’ is Deliciously Over-the-Top

Reviews by Tony Hobday

Jason & deMarco ‘Safe’ Release Date Oct. 7

by Michael Aaron

D

Star, known for its localflavored parodies, is now running Scary Poppins, a play on both Mary Poppins and Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, written by their own Ben Millet and directed by Scott Hollman. Millet’s story, set in 1910, revolves around widowered Prof. Henry Peabody, played by Justin Berry and Corey Bradenburger (each role is double-cast since the show runs nine times a week for 11 weeks), and his plight in raising two young children while busy inventing such things as the cell phone (a telephone with a 5,000-foot cord) and diaper alarm. The children, Jack (Miles Broadhead and Tod Huntington) and Jill (Chelsea Hubbard and Kellina Norby) conspire to invite Marry Poppins to be their nanny, but because of a mishap, end up with her sister, Scary (cue slasher music) Poppins (Mary Parker Williams and Marissa Poole). Baron Nogoodnik (Ed Farnsworth and Ben Millet) kidnaps the children since the professor would not hand over the formula for his invention — asphalt. The professor’s butler, Jeeves, turns turncoat and assists the baron. And, of course, you have to throw in a dash of awkward romantic interest between the professor and his maid, Prudence (Melody Baugh and Julie Blatter). The actors play their parts deliciously over-the-top, as you would expect in a esert

parody. You can tell each thoroughly enjoys their job, even though they play it over four times a week. Mary Parker Williams’ performance as Poppins was Broadway-worthy. Her facial expression and slapstick movement were delightful. A favorite moment, which you never know if planned, was a missed slasher-music cue when her name was uttered, so she injected a vocal “screechscreech-screech” to fill in. This is Broadhead’s return to Desert Star after 10 years and his enthusiasm spills to the audience. He plays the 11-yearold Jack (almost) believable — injecting a subtle gayness to the character. One of the biggest laughs in the show is when Broadhead is hovering several feet off the floor (“You better stop eating those crumpets or you’re going to turn into a blimp and fly away”) and his sister and Poppins are trying to coax him down by thinking of sad things, like dead puppies (drop), gas prices (drop), an over-nighter at Michael Jackson’s house (rise ... oops). Berry is also strong in the lead, with

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28  |  QSa lt L a k e  |  issue 112  |  Sep te mber 25 , 20 08

his booming baritone voice, impeccable comedic timing and the fact that he’s not too difficult to look at. Accompanist Mike Stewart is also a joy to watch. You can imagine him at 90 still being at the same piano with his goofy grin. Desert Star knows their audience and walks a line to ensure they don’t offend their regulars, yet throw enough risque lines in to keep it funny. (“Who’s your nanny?”) You won’t be rolling in the aisles for the full 90 minutes, as the story — and particularly the songs — could be better written. It puts a lot of pressure on the actors to keep the audience engaged. Luckily they succeed. I, for one, am looking forward to Home School Musical and American Fork Idol. Oh, and I’m hoping Nutcracker, Men in Tights is true to its title. This looks to be a strong season for the ever-expanding theater company. Scary Poppins runs through Nov. 8. Showtimes, tickets and more information are available at their Web site, desertstar.biz or by calling 801-266-2600.

I R E C TO D N A I B AY & LE S UTA H ’S G

RY

w Pages o l l e Y n a i b and Les y a G nity y u l n m O m s o ’ C h e a t h t U nity, For u m m o C ross the c e a s n By th o i t a c t 200 lo a e l .com b s a e l i g a a v P Q e is a h and at T t n o r F h c t a Was SM

The pop duo’s (and five-year couple’s) fifth full-length CD Safe continues their quest for revelations — and for many fans — a high degree of hope and inspiration. On the 14-track album, there are new versions of their older songs including “It’s OK,” “Just in Time” and “Where the Sun Meets the Sea.” Also, they cover Simon & Garfunkel’s “Bridge Over Troubled Water” with a bouncier, more gospel inflection, and deMarco sings a powerful spanish-language rendition of “Ave Maria.” The album-titled single “Safe” is the most beautifully arranged track on the CD, and “All I Long For” could very well become many, many couples’ “our song” — lyrically romantic and uplifting, bringing the desire for love into reality. For some though, Jason & deMarco may be a bit too much “angels trumpeting from heaven” — repetitive lyrics like “you’re just in time to save my life,” “a heart once made of stone has now found the answer” and “he was trying to find his own song to sing” could push some to wish they’d learned how to tie a slipknot. But overall — and which is what I believe to be their goal — the duo once again inspires, elevates hope and encourages honesty. Waves on Waves ‘Self-titled’ Bringing back the European art-rock genre, Nashville, Tenn.-based Waves on Waves could become a huge underground hit. Said to be a hybrid of Morrissey and Tears for Fears, there also seems to be a hint of Modern English and General Public in the songs “Modern Man” and “A Lighter Load.” But what really caught my attention while I listened were memories of The Beautiful South and Poi Dog Pondering, two of the most vocally eclectic groups of the 80s. The very attractive trio of men that make up Waves on Waves, lead by gay lead vocalist Kevin Thornton, doesn’t necessarily knock your socks off with their debut album, but do shine a modern light on quirky retrospectives.


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Q Horoscopes

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ARIES (Mar 21 - Apr 20) Re-value and reassess any one-to-one relationship. You can now easily charm those who can do the most for you in life. Even loving partners are more accepting of your pecadillios. Any of your less than stellar behavior is forgiven and forgotten. For those gay Rams still on the hoof, you can run with the fast crowd and win. Just be sure you are roaming in the right herd.

LIBRA (Sep 24 - Oct 23) Stand back world; Proud Libra is taking center stage. You have so much confidence that it seeps out in a variety of ways. Meet (with a capital “ME�) and press the flesh. Not only are you able to get your point across, you make inroads into any personal project. This is the time to make an excellent first impression. No, not in the living room couch cushions. Get going!

TAURUS (Apr 21 - May 21) Your day to day job seems to go more smoothly so get to work! And this effort can mean a variety of things - your actual job or exercise and diet or even deep psychological ponderings and revelations. Queer Bulls toss out any psychological baggage that lowers their confidence. Forget that self flagellation, unless of course you like it that way.

SCORPIO (Oct 24 - Nov 22) Queer Scorps entertain an enticing psychic thought or two now. Polish up your crystal ball and see what and who you see. Good things come from your gut reactions, especially if you are helping out others in the process. While you are at it, help yourself. Unlock and open your closet. Step out into the fresh air. Freedom at last! Ain’t life grand?

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p

GEMINI (May 22 - Jum 21) Luck is on your side in whatever direction you decide to turn. Use it to your advantage. Your passion for fun, creativity and romance with a special someone is highlighted. So take your latest squeeze by the hand and demonstrate why pink Twins are soooo flirty and delightful. And your creativity hits a high note this time of year, even if you can’t sing.

[

CANCER (JUN 22 - JUL 23) Sun in Libra helps you get your house in order. May I suggest a little “spring cleaning� in autumn? There is opportunity for you to conquer any lingering home based project with verve and efficiency no matter how messy it is. Gay Crabs can more easily deal with family issues now too. Be your dear queer self and let others adjust. You may be surprised at how smoothly it goes.

]

LEO (Jul 24 - Aug 23) Proud Lions are more talkative than usual. Why not use this time to take a cause one step forward? You communicate well and have the artistic flair and diplomacy to draw people’s attention and win their hearts and minds. Get involved in great movements and reach out to friends and neighbors for help. If you take it to the streets you will have followers.

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VIRGO (Aug 24 - Sep 23) Money issues come into focus. Queer Virgos have a clearer sense of what fiscal responsibility means and even consider saving for a rainy day. The most important thing is to do careful research into what is and is not feasible. Think about your long term goals and toss out what no longer gets you there. Oh heck - just make several million in the market and retire!

SAGITTARIUS (Nov 23 - Dec 22) Friends and social groups are even more important to you than usual now. Surround yourself with affirming friends, gay Archer. Compadres are there for you and vice versa as you fit well into the group dynamic. Make the most of this time - the friendships that you forge now have long term benefits and bring you to a new social level. Err is that higher or lower?

CAPRICORN (Dec 23 - Jan 20) Pink Caps can finally see the professional playing field clearly and accurately. Thank the stars for this light on your corporate path and for pointing out the better strategic opportunities. Play the politico while your charm sizzles and climb one more rung on the corporate ladder. Remember to be kind and generous to those of us that you step on on your way up. Ouch. AQUEERIUS (Jan 21 - Feb 19) Aqueerians happily plan an exciting vacation in the coming months. Will you try something exotic or relaxing? Maybe a combination of both. And try some judicial balance in any long lingering legal fights or entanglements. You are more willing to compromise and be diplomatic. Not only can you reach an accord you can also rest your case... How about in Paris!

Each Sudoku puzzle has a unique solution which can be reached logically without guessing. Enter digits 1 through 9 into the blank spaces. Every row must contain one of each digit, as must each column and each 3x3 square. Qdoku is actually five separate, but connected, Sudoku puzzles.

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PISCES (Feb 20 - Mar 20) Your sexual drive is whipped into a frenzy. Guppies can’t resist adding a few nuts and hot sauce to their sundae. You are in the drivers seat so rev your engines and start moving. Prepare for a romance that has the legs (among other parts) to go the distance through the winter. Look below the surface though and don’t just settle for a pretty face.

Get Up Early on Saturday and get the Latest Issue of QSaltLake at the Farmers Market at Pioneer Park GE T High Speed Cable Internet NOW AND GE T

Alternating Saturdays the week of our publication date.

$100.00 Cash Back $19.99 per month, free cable modem, free wireless router, free digital music and videos.

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  Sep te mber 25 , 20 08  |  issue 112  |  QSa lt L a k e  |  33


Q Scene

P E O P L E The organizers of GayBowl8 teamed up with David Daniels Photography and Hunk Du Jour to get the ... word ... out about their upcoming event. Here are some of the yummies who will be huddling on the fields. If you’re not a fan yet, maybe you will be after you look at these.

3 4  |  QSa lt L a k e  |  issue 112  |  Sep te mber 25 , 20 08

More shots are available at daviddanielsphotography.com GayBowl 8 events run from October 5 through 12 at various locations throughout the valley. Games will be played at the Murray Athletic Park at 5300 S. State Street. More information on GayBowl 8 can be found at gaybowl8.org


Q Health Sex with God? by Lynn Beltran

I once asked a patient why so many men engage in sex with men while high on methamphetamines. He gave me this answer: It’s like having sex with God, and once you have sex with God why would you do it any other way? Interestingly, after talking to this patient I have had other discussions with men who use meth who say they are unable to get an erection while high, and that’s only one of many sexual problems they have while taking the drug. Since there’s a pretty big gulf between sex with God and a limp rod, I think it is reasonable to surmise that meth has a wide range of effects on its users. Whether or not it enhances or prohibits sexual enjoyment varies by individual. But no matter how using meth makes you feel during sexual activity, research indicates that using it leads to riskier sexual behaviors and reduced condom use — two behaviors that increase the risk of getting an STI. Of course this article is not meant to discuss how meth use affects sexual intercourse, but rather to provide a little more insight into why people use the drug. Understanding is particularly important because meth use is one of the biggest driving forces behind the increasing STI rates in Salt Lake County’s gay community. In my discussions with patients, many men reveal they do not necessarily like the fact that they are using meth, and wish they had not started or wish they could stop. Many say that using has already interfered with their job or relationships or worry that it will in the future. Frequently these patients also admit that using meth

negatively impacts their self-esteem. They would like to stop, they say, but they do not feel that a traditional treatment program is appropriate for them. Keep in mind that what likely brought the client to me was testing positive for an STI or being exposed to such an infection through risky sex. In trying to identify ways to remain sexually healthy, the conversation often drifts toward the intersection between patients’ meth use and the STI they have acquired. Now while I am certainly not a licensed therapist, I can also add that our conversations often drift toward an emotional recognition on the patient’s part. For example, she or he often realizes that meth and sexual addiction often become a destructive cycle: that meth use rapidly becomes an addiction and is often the fuel for sexually addictive behaviors. The cycle is truly devastating when you consider the consequences. Antibiotic treatment for an STI, if that is even an option, provides only a temporary relief if the meth use continues — and it often does. Most clients will find themselves sitting in our clinic multiple times a year. It is truly heartwrenching to see so many members of this community engaging in behaviors that are causing distress and having a negative impact on their selfesteem and overall health. Fortunately, there are professional services available to men who are engaging in risky behaviors related to sexual activity or drug use that go beyond the traditional treatment options. If you are interested in learning more about these services, please call the Salt Lake Valley Health Department at (801) 534-4601. Q

Meth use rapidly becomes an addiction and is often the fuel for sexually addictive behaviors

Straight Boys Kissing *

Sep te mber 25 , 20 08  |  issue 112  |  QSa lt L a k e  |  35

*

*

*Private Clubs for Members


Q Puzzle

C’est Si Bong

45 Place of the first fig-leaf codpiece Add letter g to words to cre- 46 Mild oath of a metroate new phrases. sexual? Across 49 Cross-dressing Twelfth   1 Bit of salt, for Stephen Night character Pyles 51 Earhart’s medium   5 Hayes of Will & Grace 52 Member that needs no reruns lube?   9 Like an ACT UP protester 57 Flies like a falcon 14 Wine region of 58 Fruit cover Michelangelo’s land 59 “___ do anything better 15 Isle of exile in Brando’s than you” Desiree 61 Rainbow maker 16 Word that may follow 62 Suffix with prefer sperm or organ 63 Chip’s partner 17 Lindsay Lohan’s ___ Girls 64 Up ___ (with one’s ass in 18 Santa’s got a long one a sling) 19 Make up 65 Stag party? 20 Well-endowed barbarian? 66 It’ll spice up your meat 23 Caligula’s arts Down 24 Composer Copland 25 Billie Jean’s successor?   1 Lesbian’s latex   2 Where to find Moby Dick 29 “Nuts!”   3 9 inches, e.g. 33 Bonehead   4 Prick one’s curiosity 34 Time for cowboys to about shoot off   5 Has a bottom line of 35 Tinkerbell, e.g.   6 East of Eden director 36 Bi plus mono Kazan 37 R.E.M.’s former record   7 You can do it to avoid label sexually transmitted 38 Gay pickup spot disease 40 He knocked out many   8 Lane of The Producers men   9 My Own Private ___ 41 Joan of Arc keepsake 10 The Capitol dome is its 43 City where Dick Button top won gold 11 Soon, to Shakespeare 44 Number of gay men under a centurian? 12 Half of a pair for grabbing

Cryptogram A cryptogram is a puzzle where one letter in the puzzle is substituted with another. For example: ECOLVGNCYXW YCR EQYIIRZNBZN YZU PSZ! Has the solution: CRYPTOGRAMS ARE CHALLENGING AND FUN! In the above example Es are all replaced by Cs. The puzzle is solved by recognizing letter patterns in words and successively substituting letters until the solution is reached. This week’s hint: H = G

Theme: Part of a quote by famed author George Orwell.

Krbpvxphcklof xe pjtf bp va bcrebag yoaj xb camakte epqaboxjh gxehckdasrt.

_____________ __ ____ __ __ _______ ____ __ _______ _________ ___________.

C

13 It may come before long 21 Queer, in a way 22 Work unit 25 Part of a cathedral name in gay Paree 26 Follower of lop or dog 27 Dossier about Uranus? 28 Cold-cocks 30 Gay rodeo accessory 31 The Wizard of Oz scorer Harold 32 Active in B and D 35 Like pansies, perhaps? 38 Biter of Marc Antony’s girlfriend 39 Poisonous bush 42 How Countee Cullen wrote 43 Like a rainbow of colors 46 First note sound, in The Sound of Music 47 Oscar Wilde’s partner Douglas 48 “Tin men” of sci-fi 50 “C’est Moi,” to Lancelot 52 Legal wrong 53 Film exposing Treat Williams 54 Fairy tale start 55 Trojans’ org. 56 Balls of brass 57 Cruising area 60 Where to find lesbianation.com

Anagram

An anagram is a word or phrase that can be made using the letters from another word or phrase. Rearrange the letters below to answer:

Author of ‘gay saga’ novels Deep Dish and Deeper Dish.

grams rehab charr ____ ___________ PUZZLE SOLUTIONS ARE ON PAGE 38

3 6  |  QSa lt L a k e  |  issue 112  |  Sep te mber 25 , 20 08

O

M

I

C

S


HOMES FOR SALE

Q Classifieds REAL ESTATE FEATURED PROPERTY:

CAPITOL HILL/MARMALADE

ROOMMATE WANTED — $375 with utilities and internet. $300 deposit. 2 vacancies. Rose Park Fairpark area. Bedroon in house. Call Rob 801-688-4925.

HELP WANTED

345 REED AVENUE, Salt Lake City UT 84103, $229,900, 2 br 1 ba 1,300 sqft, Single-Family Home. Beautiful Victorian era detailiing in the contrasting brick arched headers above the windows. Less than a block from Salt Lake’s newest gay bar. Cathy Mooney Real Estate, 486-9200, cathymooney. com MLS ID: 818254

FUN JOB! Now hiring 18-23 guys & girls to work + travel. Travel expenses paid in full, other expenses paid 1st month. We train! Call now! 1-866-857-9284. ALL KINDS of jobs available. Temp, temp to hire. Immediate need. All pay ranges. Contact Steve Whittaker 801-463-4828.

CLEANING SERVICES

WE CLEAN houses, apartments, offices and more. One-time, weekly or monthly schedules. We’ll come to you for a free estimate and provide references. We use our own cleaning supplies. Great work ethic. Call Juanita or Manuel at 801-759-9305.

Service Guide ACCOUNTANTS

Heart-Song & Erickson

A Bookkeeping, Payroll & Tax Service

(formerly Heart-Song Enterprises, Inc.)

801-484-3941 brook@heartsongaccounting.com tom@heartsongaccounting.com

ATTORNEYS

PERSONAL TRAINING

MARMALADE TUDOR

247 W Reed Ave (750 North) Charming Marmalade tudor on a quiet street! Extrordinary space, hardwood floors, formal dining, large kitchen, basement is a walk out w/great ceiling height — this is a great home! Great neighbors! Half block from the city’s newest upscale gay bar — JAM at the Marmalade. 3 bedrooms, 1½ baths in this 2,352 square foot house.

$275,000 The Bringhurst Group Real Estate | www. slchouses.com

Kathy McCabe

801.897.5390 / kathy@slchouses.com MLS ID#816020 FEATURED PROPERTY:

214 REED AVENUE, Salt Lake City UT 84103, $179,900, 2 br 1 ba 804 sqft, Built in 1886. Less than a block from Salt Lake’s newest gay bar. Marie Ginman, 4660678, Allpro Realty Group. MLS#: 825849

339 REED AVENUE, Salt Lake City UT 84103, $237,000, 3 br 1 ba 1,090 sqft, Updated single-family home built in 1890. Newly refurbished. Less than a block from Salt Lake’s newest gay bar. John Armstrong, Ari Realty, 915-6595.

GLENDALE

LOOK HOT this summer! Be the best you can be. Find your inner and outer strength with Steven Walker, personal trainer, NASM certified at 688-1918 or PMKirt234@yahoo.com. Call for your free body composition analysis and full body workout.

MASSAGE

PRIDE MASSAGE Your preference male or female therapist. Individuals, couples, groups. Warm, friendly, licensed professionals. Call 486-5500 for an appointment. Open late 7 days a week. 1800 S West Temple.

HEALING HANDS Body and Energy Work by Christian 654-0175

christianallred.com MITYME MASSAGE Call Kevin 801-792-8569. Taking appts. from 6–10pm

PERSONALS

WHERE LOCAL GUYS MEET Browse & Respond FREE! 801-5950005 Use Code 5705. Also Visit MegaMates.com, 18+

FOR SALE

AWESOME remodeled 3 bed, 2 bath Glendale home Stainless Steel appliances, maple kitchen, bamboo floors and more. 1553 W. Indiana Ave MLS# 787787 $155,900, Kerry Sanford, Service First Realty, 801-201-0665 or visit me online @ KerrySanford.com.

SUGAR HOUSE

MARMALADE SQUARE Fantastic Remodel on these 1- and 2-bedroom units. New central air, hardwoods, tile, windows, fixtures, full appliance package. Fully fenced private backyards available. Enjoy the lifestyle this community offers. Pool, spa, & gym. Pets are welcome! Condo living on West Capitol Hill, Downtown for under $200,000 – unheard of! Now represented by your favorite real estate agent – Julie Silveous.

Call Julie today at 502-4507 Stop by to take a look at 244 West 6th North M-F Noon-6pm, Sat 11a-6pm, Sun 1-6pm

MISC.

UTAHGAYDATE.COM HAS free chat, an interactive webzine, Dating Advice, and free profiles. Join utahgaydate.com.

SUGARHOUSE. Desirable location. 2567 sq ft w/ finished basement. 3 bdrm 2 full bath, large backyard, freshly painted, ready to move in and make your own. 259,900. 2524 S. Dearborn, SLC. mls#726482. Contact Mary at 6613175, Keller Williams South Valley Realtors. FOR RENT ADS are just $10 per issue. Call 801-649-6663 to get yours in the next issue.

ROOMMATES

Advertise in the QSaltLake Classifieds by calling 801-649-6663 Today

1996 ISUZU Trooper 4x4 Limited Edition. 3.2 liter engine, automatic drive. Includes sunroof, power windows and seats, side-mirror defrost, heated leather seats, overdrive, headlight wipers, 20CD player and A/C. Gray/dark blue. Low mileage. Interior/exterior in great condition. $4100 obo. Call Manuel at 801-759-9305.

1 BEDROOM + bath in avenues home. $550/month + utilities. House has fully furnished living room, kitchen and dining area. Looking for someone to stay for at least 6 months to 1 year. $250 deposit required. Anticipated move-in date asap. Must be 21 or older; no pets. Call 792-5969 to schedule appt.

QUEER TV. Comcast not giving you what you need? Sign up for DirecTV through this gayowned and operated business. UtahSat.com ENTERTAINMENT BOOKS — Get one meal when you buy another, free arts tickets and more. EntertainmentUtah.com TAKE A Friend to Lunch, Save 60%. $25 certificates to Salt Lake restaurants for just $10 or less. Give as a gift or use for yourself. SLRESTAURANT.COM GET HIGH SPEED CABLE INTERNET NOW AND GET $100.00 CASH BACK $19.99 / mo, free cable modem, wireless router, music, videos. UTAHCOMCAST.COM

What a great combination! Classifieds run for $5 per line (30 characters), 4 line minimum. Specials: Roommate ads $5 for 5 lines

ELECTRICIANS

LIVE WIRE SERVICE 278-1155 / 466-9555

BUSINESS PRINTING

FLORISTS

500 BUSINESS CARDS / $50 500 POSTCARDS / $80

the art and craft of floral design

3345 S Main St • 322-2671

801-649-6663

PUBLISHER OF QSALTLAKE

CLEANING SERVICES

INSURANCE

WE CLEAN houses, apart-

Steven R Fisher Insur Agcy Inc

ments, offices and more.

Steven R Fisher,

Agent, Sandy UT 84070

One-time, weekly or month-

801-561-1438

ly schedules. We’ll come to you for a free estimate and provide references. We use our own cleaning supplies. Great work ethic.

LIKE A GOOD NEIGHBOR, STATE FARM IS THERE®

Call Juanita or Manuel at

Providing Insurance and Financial Services State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company – Bloomington, IL. State Farm Fire and Casualty Company – Bloomington, IL.

801-759-9305. P067001 01/06

COUNSELING

OFFICIANTS

Ready for Healthy Changes and New Beginnings?

Rev. Leesa Myers

PRIDE COUNSELING

Commitment Celebrations/Weddings, Baby Blessings, Seminars, Retreats, Spiritual Counseling 801-824-0774 leesahp@msn.com

Gay and Lesbian Mental Health Services • Gay Men’s Support Group • Individuals, Couples, Group Counseling • Gay Men’s HIV/AIDS Support Group • Substance Abuse Support Group 231 East 400 South, Salt Lake City

801-595-0666 pridecounseling.tv

Terri Busch, LCSW Empathy is a radical act

Individual, Couples and Family Counseling. Life Transitions, Gender/Sexual Identity, Women’s Issues

264-9048

4PVUI &BTU t 4VJUF Salt Lake City, Utah

Interfaith Celebrations

www.interfaithcelebrations.com

PERSONAL TRAINING

ONE TRAINER ONE GOAL ONE ULTIMATE YOU

For free consultation, call Steve at 688-1918

ADVERTISE IN THE QSALTLAKE SERVICE GUIDE Call 801-649-6663 today.

Sep te mber 25 , 20 08 | issue 112 | QSa lt L a k e | 3 7


Support the Businesses that Support You

Q Tales

These businesses brought you this issue of QSaltLake. Make sure to thank them with your patronage.

Jacin Tales Episode 7:

A New Day Spa. . . . . . . . . 272-3900

Our Phoenix

Area 51. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 534-0819 Aaron Butler. . . . . . . . . . . 554-4723

By A.E. Storm

J

George approach him on the Trax platform, a large smile gleaming. He held his arms out ready to hug George, and as they connected George evaporated – a chilling mist engulfed Jacin and his heart plummeted. He pivoted left to right searching for George, then realized the platform was completely empty of passengers and the night air dead silent. Fear overtook him, and as he started to run, he realized he was inside a large, transparent gerbil’s runabout ball. It rolled off the platform and continued rolling along the track until it dropped into an endless green sea. The sun roared into being and beat down on Jacin, warming the trail of blood trickling from his right temple. Standing barefoot and motionless on the desert floor he stared across a valley of Pinions, the occasional apex of a cabin peeking over the trees. Silently from behind knotted trunks — like skilled hunters — emerged George, Eddie, Josh, Leticia, Kat and Jody, each in the nude. They grouped and gingerly approached Jacin. Through his peripheral vision, Jacin picked up knee-high black patent stiletto boots filled with a woman’s legs that led to a black patent mini skirt, bare navel and black patent bustier. The full body materialized into pop diva Rihanna. She was holding a large cardboard Publisher’s Clearing House check made out to Jacin Reese in the amount of acin watched

Beehive Bail Bonds. . . . . 328-3329 two million dollars, and was singing an operatic version of “Disturbia.” Jacin’s friends, mud swallows, hummingbirds, jack rabbits and mule deer gathered around Rihanna and joined in verse like seen in a Disney film. Shimmering in a gold leotard, Jacin was being whipped around on Lagoon’s Wicked ride, his head painfully vibrating against the back of the seat. Around and around the ride took him, never-ending, ad nauseam. In the third rotation the vehicle jerked to a halt 70 feet up the 110-foot tower. Jacin peeled open his eyes focusing in on the slate blue sky. From deep within the flat, lingering clouds — looking down at him like mythological gods — were his mother, father and twin brother Jeff. They were whispering to each other, but Jacin could not hear nor understand what was being said. But what he could hear in the distance was a faint humming, and several seconds later a yellow and red PT-17 Stearman biplane came into view. The pilot — clad in a brown bomber jacket and matching flying cap, goggles and white silk flying scarf — waved at him as he flew overhead. Jacin then realized it was Eddie, and in the seat behind him sat Snoopy, dressed similarly and flashing a MetLife flag. Puffs of smoke billowed from the rear of the plane forming a message. When Jacin read the first few words, he recognized it as a poem that Eddie had written for him several years ago while dating. The sky read:

Puzzle Solutions Marc Harshbarger

QDoku

6 8 5 7 1 3 9 4 2

3 7 2 9 4 6 8 5 1

9 1 4 5 8 2 3 6 7

9 3 7 8 1 5 4 2 6 2 9 8 6 3 4 7 1 5

4 5 2 3 6 7 9 8 1 1 5 3 2 7 8 6 9 4

1 8 6 2 9 4 5 3 7 7 4 6 1 5 9 2 3 8

5 6 1 8 9 7 4 2 3 9 6 5 8 7 1 5 3 2 6 4 9

8 3 9 4 2 1 5 7 6 1 4 8 2 9 3 6 4 1 8 7 5

4 2 7 3 6 5 1 8 9 3 2 7 5 6 4 9 7 8 2 1 3

6 9 4 7 5 3 1 8 2

3 1 2 8 9 6 7 4 5

8 5 7 4 1 2 6 3 9

2 7 3 6 1 5 9 4 8 2 7 1 3 5 6 7 1 2 4 8 9

9 8 5 4 3 2 7 6 1 5 3 4 9 2 8 3 4 5 7 1 6

6 4 1 7 8 9 2 3 5 6 8 9 4 1 7 8 9 6 2 3 5

2 7 3 9 6 1 5 4 8 3 6 9 5 7 8 4 1 2

1 4 9 5 8 7 3 6 2 1 5 8 9 2 4 3 7 6

6 8 5 4 2 3 1 9 7 4 2 7 3 6 1 5 8 9

7 9 1 6 5 4 8 2 3 5 1 4 8 9 7 6 2 3

8 3 4 2 7 9 6 5 1 8 9 6 2 4 3 1 5 7

5 6 2 1 3 8 9 7 4 7 3 2 1 5 6 8 9 4

3 8  |  QSa lt L a k e  |  issue 112  |  Sep te mber 25 , 20 08

3 4 8 7 5 6 1 9 2

Crossword

Anagram:

7 1 5 4 2 9 3 6 8

Autobiography is only to be trusted when it reveals something disgraceful.

6 2 9 1 8 3 7 5 4

Cryptogram:

The Beer Nut . . . . . . . . . . . 531-8182 Bliss Nightlife. . . . . . . . . . 860-1083 Blue Boutique . . . . . . . . . 485-2072 Cafe Med . . . . . . . . . . . . . 493-0100 Cahoots . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 538-0606 Club Try-Angles. . . . . . . . 364-3203 Dennis Massage . . . . . . . 598-8344 Reborn again our Phoenix has risen in Magnificent design; His envious idealism Color his feathers in boundless elegance. His wicked eyes Emulate a renewed youthful humor. His beak conspicuous, Yet earnest in character. This renowned being, unwavering in conviction Is embodied in the souls passed flight over. And each year and decade to come, With each immolation, our Phoenix will rise Stronger and more beautiful in our eyes. And in centuries to pass, long after we are gone Our Phoenix will be reborn in the generations of our kin. Jacin’s eyes filled with emotion, forcing him to blink — pusihng a tear out and rolling off his cheek. The god-like image of his mother reformed, but this time he could hear her say, “He’s crying.” Then Jacin’s chest turned heavy and his body temperature increased to a prickly warm. The bar that restrained him in the vehicle suddenly unlatched. His body, weightless and hot, floated upward. Frightened and uncomfortable, he flailed for something concrete. From the distance a fiery mass, like a meteor, plummeted towards him. But instead of annihilating him, it enveloped him like a blanket. Jacin suddenly felt safe, revitalized and at peace inside the magenta, gold and red flames. Like a movie trailer of his life, he could clearly see himself and George being legally married in Utah, then a black man in the Oval Office, then himself in New York City taking photos of the Freedom Tower and oddly, then himself accepting a check for an undisclosed amount from Rihanna. To be continued…

The Dog Show. . . . . . . . . 466-6100 Egyptian Theatre. . . 435-649-9371 Gossip!. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 328-0255 Healing Hands. . . . . . . . . 654-0175 John Diamond Law . . . . . 274-3621 Justify’d . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 495-5062 Kathy Elton Consulting. . 230-8437 KRCL-FM. . . . . . . . . . . . . . 363-1818 LastMinuteCruisePro.com Michael Picardi . . . . . mpicardi.net MegaPhone. 595-0005, code 4621 Moab Folk Festival. . . . . . . . . . . . . . moabfolkfestival.com Odyssey Dance Theatre . . . . . . . . . odysseydance.com Paper Moon. . . . . . . . . . . 713-0678 Pride Counseling. . . . . . . 595-0666 Pride Massage. . . . . . . . . 486-5500 TheQPages. . . . . . . . . . . . 649-6663 Red Iguana. . . . . . . . . . . . 322-1489 Sage’s Cafe. . . . . . . . . . . 322-3790 Salt Lake Men’s Choir. . . . 581-7100 Salt Lake Pizza & Pasta. 484-1804 Salt Lake Valley Health. . 534-4666 Sam Weller’s Books . . . . 328-2586 SkiOut Utah. . . . . . skioututah.com Julie Silveous Realtor. . . . 502-4507 The Tavernacle. . . . . . . . . 519-8900 The Trapp Door . . . . . . . . 533-0173 Tuacahn Amphitheatre.tuacahn.org Utah Humanities Council.359-9670 Utah Symphony/Opera. . . usuo.org W Lounge. myspace.com/wlounge We Train You Obtain.877-968-6282 Jeff Williams Taxi. . . . . . . 971-6287 Dr. Douglas Woseth. . . . . 266-8841


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Q

e g a P k c a B

Is it time for a change?

Make it happen with Body Electric. October 11 and 12. 801-699-7044.

“Body Works” by Dennis www.dennismassage.com (801) 598-8344

Calling all musicians

Send tracks to Utah Free Media. Grassroots broadcasting lives online.

Utahfm.Org

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In Over Your Head? In debt? We can help. Free, private consultation.

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Look Hot this Summer! Shed those extra pounds with Steven Walker, NASM-certified personal trainer. Call for your free body composition analysis and full body workout. 801-688-1918 or PMKirt234@yahoo.com

LOGO TV IS GAY TV Sign up for DirecTV and get MTV’s LOGO and a donation goes to a gay cause.

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HEALING HANDS Body and Energy Work by Christian

• Deep Tissue • Swedish • • Relaxation • Increased Immunity • • Reduced Heart Rate • Improved Blood Pressure • Reduced Pain • • Reduced Anxiety, Depression •

christianallred.com

654-0175


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