QSaltLake March 17, 2011

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Utah’s News & Entertainment Magazine for the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Community | FREE

Gay Wedding salt lake

PHOTOGRAPHY BY LAURIE

Issue 176 March 17, 2011

Issue

Our annual wedding giveaway was an elaborate affair Buttars Retires

Ogden Ordinances

Legislative Wrap-up

Oh Boy, George!


First Person

from the publisher Something beautiful and right by Michael Aaron

S

ometimes it takes just sitting at a wedding ceremony, watching two people profess their love to a crowd of friends and family, to remind you what may be right in this world. As many, including myself, who had spent the night with their eyes glued to

news reports of a catastrophe halfway across the globe, two men were fretting details about their big day only hours away. On that day, they would stand before hundreds of people — their parents, their fellow churchgoers, their close friends and their god — and perform a ritual similar to those done for hun-

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dreds of years by others before them. During that ritual, they would make promises to each other, among which, to do everything in their power to make their relationship work. And, while this particular ceremony was full of pomp — a choir, a quintet, two reverends and ancient rituals — it

was the most minute of things that made me choke back a bit of emotion — a father’s supportive hand placed on the small of his son’s back as he married the man he loved, the terrified face of a daughter processing down the aisle, glances between teenage boys as they watched two men kiss in public, a sibling brushing a tear from her face. Yes, the ceremony was grand. Easily the most grand I’ve attended. Having a choir sing softly during words from the minister and the couple’s vows to one another, followed by a rousing Alleluia Fanfare was, I’m sure, designed to strum the heart chords. And it did. While some may say the ceremony was controversial, none in that chapel were pondering such things. Most likely had walked out wondering about the normalcy of the event. And as the couple stressed about the tiny details of the day, the precise moments and the perfect words, it is only they who may remember all of that. Those watching will remember the grandiosity, the minutia and the emotion of the day. But those in attendance will also remember that something right and good happened that day. Even on a day that will be remembered in history by the rest of the world as the day thousands were affected by a tragic earthquake, and millions watched as technicians worked tirelessly in an attempt to avoid a nuclear catastrophe. Even on a day when the world fears a worsening economy because of rising gasoline prices, political uprisings and continuing wars. On this day, something simple, beautiful and right happened and I was among those lucky enough to see it happen. Congratulations to Manuel and Kamrin on their big day. And congratulations to those who were also lucky enough to see it happen.  Q

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The cast from Annie Baker’s Circle Mirror Transformation will present a scene from SLAC’s upcoming production at 7pm.

Q staff publisher Michael Aaron editor Seth Bracken arts & entertainment

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the sole o with the McAdams, Matt Spencer months o sales manager  Brad Di Iorio “The pr and tell office manager  Tony Hobday ing LGBT distribution  Brad Di Iorio, Ryan Benson, group’s p Michael Hamblin, Gary Horenkamp, he will fi Nancy Burkhart, Carlos Samayoa anywher publisher Salt Lick Publishing, LLC 1055 East 2100 South, ste 206 Salt Lake City, Utah 84106 The Eur tel: 801-649-6663 ruled Ma toll-free: 1-800-806-7357 European when it for general information: man from info@qsaltlake.com positive. for editorial queries: The ma editor@qsaltlake.com and they The rul QSaltLake is a trademark of dent in tw Salt Lick Publishing, LLC. people as Copyright © 2011, Salt Lick Publishing LLC. tal rights All rights reserved. No material may be tion, and reprinted or reproduced without written the status permission from the publisher. Copies of tory of pr QSaltLake are distributed free of charge Restric in 200 locations across Utah and in Idaho groups fa contributing photographers Ben

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International news

Italian PM: Gay unions will be kept at lower level

Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi said Feb. 26, “As long as we are in power, traditional marriage and gay ed unions will never ynn be on the same usseau, level.” th, Greg The national enline, LGBT group ArAnnalisa cigay denounced mear, the remark as Hunter “another ruthless hattuck, use of homosexu, als and transItalian Prime Minister Anne sexuals’ lives Silvio Berlusconi and feelings with the sole objective of restoring the alliance en with the Catholic electorate, disgusted by months of sexual scandals.” “The prime minister should look around and tell us which countries are treating LGBT people like he does,” said the n Benson, group’s president, Paolo Patanè. “Maybe mp, he will find out that this does not happen a anywhere in the civilized world.”

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Euro Court rules against Russia in HIV case

The European Court of Human Rights ruled March 10 that Russia violated the European Convention on Human Rights when it denied a residence permit to a man from Uzbekistan because he is HIVpositive. The man is married to a Russian woman and they have a child together. The ruling created European legal precedent in two ways: It recognized HIV-positive people as a distinct group whose fundamenshing LLC. tal rights are protected from discriminamay be tion, and it elevated HIV-positive people to written the status of a “vulnerable group with a hisCopies of tory of prejudice and stigmatisation.” charge Restrictions on the rights of vulnerable d in Idaho groups face the highest level of court scru-

by Rex Wockner

tiny and are presumed to be illegal from the get-go. The court said, “The mere presence of a HIV-positive individual in a country is not in itself a threat to public health.” Russia was found to have violated Article 8 of the European Convention on Human Rights, which concerns right to family life, and Article 14, which bans discrimination. Last October, the Euro Court ruled against Russia in the matter of Moscow’s ongoing bans of gay pride events. The court found that the nation violated guarantees of the European Convention in the areas of freedom of assembly and association, right to an effective remedy and prohibition of discrimination.

Sexual-orientation statement to be delivered at the UN A joint statement recognizing human rights violations based on sexual orientation and gender identity will be delivered at the United Nations Human Rights Council on March 21. The deadline for countries to sign onto it is March 18. At present, 58 nations have endorsed the statement. Gay activists who are involved in U.N. affairs are urging colleagues around the world to lobby their national governments to sign up. Among the nations being targeted are Bosnia and Herzegovina, Moldova, Turkey and Ukraine. The statement will be read out by the U.N.’s ambassador from Colombia.

Euro Parliament warns Turkey, Montenegro on gay equality Adopting resolutions on Turkey’s and Montenegro’s progress toward joining the European Union, the European Parliament on March 9 told both nations they will have to do better on LGBT equality if they want to be part of the EU. Turkey must “ensure that equality, re-

gardless of sex ... or sexual orientation, is guaranteed by the law and effectively enforced,” the parliament said. Ongoing problems include forced closures of LGBT organizations, the army’s classification of homosexuality as a psychosexual illness, murders of transgender people, and the withdrawal of sexual orientation from a draft anti-discrimination law, the parliament said. While Montenegro does ban anti-LGBT discrimination in employment and public services, the Euro Parliament said that discrimination persists “including on the part of state authorities.” The co-president of the parliament’s LGBT Intergroup, Ulrike Lunacek, said: “We demand that Ferhat Dinosa, minister for human minority rights, defend LGBT people’s human rights instead of displaying intolerance and insensitivity to these issues. This is the only way forward for Montenegro’s accession process.”

Lithuanian MPs want to ban gender-reassignment surgery Conservative members of Lithuania’s Parliament have proposed banning genderreassignment surgery via the Civil Code. They said the move would protect the nation “from any preconditions which create grounds for the appearance of claims against Lithuania at the European Court of Human Rights.” Lithuania lost an ECHR case in 2007 concerning a transsexual’s right to genderreassignment surgery. The court said the nation violated the individual’s right to respect of private life and ordered payment of damages in the amount of 40,000 euros, which Lithuania paid. The Civil Code currently allows for gender-reassignment surgery but the nation lacks necessary laws setting forth the conditions and procedures for surgery. The Lithuanian Gay League denounced the parliamentary proposal.

Euro Parliament blasts Iran on gays The European Parliament on March 10 adopted a resolution urging Iran to “stop discriminating against people on the basis of their sexual orientation” and denouncing “the inhumane and medieval practice of sentencing people to death for alleged offences pertaining to choice of partners or sexual practices.” The parliament also welcomed “steps taken by several Member States to provide shelter to those Iranian human rights defenders, dissidents, journalists, students, women, children and artists who are persecuted for their religious beliefs, opinions, sexual orientation, or other aspects of the exercise of their human rights.” Iran has the death penalty for consensual homosexual sex. While no such executions have been documented in recent years, it is widely believed they may have occurred. Executions are known to have taken place in recent years following convictions in cases of alleged nonconsensual sex between males.

British gay magazine launches Thai edition The wellk n o w n British gay magazine ­A t t i t u d e launched a Thailanguage edition in Thailand on March 9. According to local correspondent Douglas Sanders, it was full of fancy ads, including from Jean Paul Gaultier, Diesel, Puma, Giorgio Armani, Davidoff and Playboy eyewear.

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national news

Quips & Quotes

by Rex Wockner

No same-sex marriage this year for Maryland Maryland was widely expected to become the next U.S. state to legalize same-sex marriage but the plan crashed and burned March 11. The bill to legalize gay marriage had passed the Senate and had the governor’s support, but, at the last minute, after almost three hours of debate in the House of Delegates, supporters realized they did not have the votes there. The bill then was returned to committee by a voice vote. According to one report, key House opponents included African American legislators from Prince George’s County and conservative Democrats from the Baltimore area and the southern part of the state. “While we are disappointed the House did not vote to pass marriage equality today, we are confident we will win in the future,” Equality Maryland said in a statement. “It is best to delay this historic vote until we are absolutely sure we have the votes to win.” Same-sex marriage is legal in Connecticut, Iowa, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Vermont and Washington, D.C. In addition, same-sex marriages from anywhere in the world are recognized as marriages in Maryland, New Mexico, New York, Rhode Island and California (if the marriage took place before Proposition 8 passed) even though those states do not let same-sex couples marry. Meanwhile, in the run-up to the House of Delegates debate, Delegate Peter Murphy told the Washington Blade on March 9 that he’s gay. “I have never denied (being gay). I just presumed people knew,” he said. There are six other openly gay members of the Maryland House, and one openly gay senator.

California Legislature may demand military stop fining gays California state Sen. Christine Kehoe introduced a resolution sponsored by Equality California on March 9 calling on President Barack Obama, Congress and Defense Secretary Robert Gates to stop fining LGB servicemembers who were discharged under Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell. Said EQCA: “Although DADT has been found to be unconstitutional as a violation of the First and Fifth Amendments, and the U.S. Congress passed a repeal that was signed by the president, the military continues to demand that our brave soldiers who were unfairly discharged by this outrageous policy pay for their education because they were discharged.” EQCA Executive Director Geoff Kors called the demands for repayment, which have topped $75,000 in some cases, “beyond offensive.”

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I’m going to tell you where I stand and I don’t want to know where you stand. You may not agree with me but you’ll always know where I stand.” — Sen. Chris Buttars said about his governing policies when announcing his immediate retirement from the Senate. He represented his district since 2001

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Supreme Court OKs Phelps funeral pickets The U.S. Supreme Court ruled 8-1 on March 2 that Kansas’ Westboro Baptist Church has a constitutional right to picket military funerals carrying signs that say such things as “God hates fags.” The court said the church’s “speech” is “certainly hurtful and its contribution to public discourse may be negligible,” but the pickets are nonetheless protected by the First Amendment. “Speech is powerful. It can stir people to action, move them to tears of both joy and sorrow, and -- as it did here -- inflict great pain,” the court said. “On the facts before us, we cannot react to that pain by punishing the speaker. As a nation we have chosen a different course -- to protect even hurtful speech on public issues to ensure that we do not stifle public debate. That choice requires that we shield Westboro from tort liability for its picketing in this case.” The church had been sued by the family of a fallen soldier whose funeral its members picketed. Justice Samuel A. Alito Jr. disagreed with the court’s majority, saying, “Our profound national commitment to free and open debate is not a license for the vicious verbal assault that occurred in this case.” Most national gay organizations did not respond to the decision. Kate Kendell, executive director of the National Center for Lesbian Rights, was the exception. “What is striking about today’s decision is not the court’s legal analysis, which does not break new ground, but the spotlight this case shines on the despicable character and hate-

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fulness of anti-gay bigotry,” Kendell said. “Can you imagine fighting for the right to spew hatred at a funeral? What an appalling indictment of those who oppose our humanity and equality.”

Immigration Equality to sue federal government The LGBT group Immigration Equality is planning to sue the federal government over the Defense of Marriage Act because it prevents married U.S. citizens from bringing their foreign same-sex spouses to live with them in U.S. states that allow same-sex marriage or recognize same-sex marriages from elsewhere. The planned lawsuit follows President Barack Obama’s recent instruction to the Justice Department that it stop defending in court the section of DOMA that bans the federal government from recognizing states’ same-sex marriages. Immigration Equality said it believes there is a good chance the lawsuit will succeed, at least for legally married same-sex couples in states that allow or recognize same-sex marriages. Same-sex marriage is legal in Connecticut, Iowa, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Vermont and Washington, D.C. In addition, same-sex marriages from anywhere in the world are recognized as marriages in Maryland, New Mexico, New York, Rhode Island and California (if the marriage took place before Proposition 8 passed) even though those states do not let same-sex couples marry.

The production may attempt to entertain audiences for an evening, but The Book of Mormon as a volume of scripture will change people’s lives forever by bringing them closer to Christ.” — The Mormon Church’s official response to the new Broadway musical by South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone. The musical is called, The Book of Mormon. It’s received rave reviews from a variety of outlets including the New York Times, Vogue and the Salt Lake Tribune

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The Boy Scouts remain a flash point in the debate over gay rights, however. News media outlets regularly run stories with criticism of the Boy Scout policy.” — Tad Walch from the Deseret News explaining the top threats to so-called traditional marriage. The Boy Scouts were threat number seven

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Apart from the sex with men, I am a gay man.” — Late-night talk show host, Craig Ferguson told his openly-gay guest, Isaac Mizrahi The boar pendent S Momentum is Texas, gr building, and we think dents to f all of Colorado’s state ance (GS legislators ought to have the Liberties opportunity to vote on civil Nikki Pee unions. And we hope they permissio will approve this important Accord step toward relationship threatene equality for Colorado’s gay groups fr and lesbian citizens.” GSA to fo — A Denver Post editorial “It sho supporting the steps the Colorado this muc legislature is taking to legalize civil purpose i unions. The editorial also supports for all stu for the fir full marriage equality rights

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NY governor to push for same-sex marriage this year The new national group Equality Matters met with New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo on March 10 and reported that he’s eager to legalize same-sex marriage this year. “While our specific discussion today is private, what’s clear from our meeting with Gov. Cuomo is that he wants to get this done this year, as soon as possible, and that he is prepared to use his considerable power and influence to make it happen,” said EM President Richard Socarides. “What’s not clear,” Socarides added, “is how we get to the magic number of 32 in the Senate.” Equality Matters describes itself as a new campaign for full LGBT equality that utilizes strategic communications, research, training and media monitoring to strengthen efforts for full LGBT rights and to correct anti-gay misinformation. Same-sex marriage is legal in Connecticut, Iowa, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Vermont and Washington, D.C. In addition, same-sex marriages from anywhere in the world are recognized as marriages in Maryland, New Mexico, New York, Rhode Island and California (if the marriage took place before Proposition 8 passed) even though those states do not let same-sex couples marry.

DC sees doubling in marriage-license applications Marriage-license applications in Washington, D.C., jumped from 3,100 in 12 months to 6,600 in 12 months in the year since same-sex marriage was legalized. Though the district does not keep tallies of straight versus gay licenses, the number of applications per year usually varies very little, strongly suggesting that all of the increase since March 2010 can be attributed to gay people.

x with .” how host, penly-gay c Mizrahi The board of trustees of Flour Bluff Independent School District in Corpus Christi, Texas, granted permission March 8 for stunk dents to form a campus Gay-Straight Allie ance (GSA) club after the American Civil ave the Liberties Union intervened on behalf of n civil Nikki Peet, a student who had been denied they permission to start the club. ortant According to the ACLU, the school had ship threatened to prevent all extracurricular o’s gay groups from meeting rather than allow the ” GSA to form. t editorial “It shouldn’t have taken this long and Colorado this much struggle to start a club whose alize civil purpose is to make our school a safer space supports for all students,” said Peet. “We can’t wait for the first meeting.” lity rights

School to let gays meet

Celebrate Your Love ..Your Way

San Diego Calif. mayoral candidates Bonnie Dumanis, REX WOCKNER Christine Kehoe and Carl DeMaio

San Diego mayoral race has three gay/lesbian candidates The June 2012 election for mayor of San Diego, America’s eighth-largest city, could have three openly gay/lesbian candidates. Republican District Attorney Bonnie Dumanis and Republican City Councilman Carl DeMaio already have filed papers, and Democratic state Sen. Christine Kehoe is widely expected to file shortly. Kehoe, as the only Democrat in the group, probably would garner the most support from the city’s LGBT activists. Dumanis took immediate fire from local Democratic gay leaders as she announced her candidacy March 10, with the predominantly gay San Diego Democratic Club accusing her of being more loyal to the GOP than to her fellow LGBTs. The club said that in last year’s statewide elections, Dumanis supported Republican candidates for governor and attorney general who vowed to reverse the state’s policy of refusing to defend Proposition 8 in court. Those candidates lost, and Gov. Jerry Brown and Attorney General Kamala Harris have continued the nondefense policy. “Although I consider Bonnie a friend and believe she has been an effective judge and district attorney, there are significant policy issues where progressives disagree with her,” said SDDC President Doug Case. “Her loyalty appears to rest more with the Republican Party than the LGBT community as witnessed by some of her endorsements.” Prop 8, passed by voters in November 2008, amended the California Constitution to re-ban same-sex marriage. It was later struck down as unconstitutional by a federal judge in San Francisco. That decision is now on appeal at the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals.

Wyoming Senate kills anti-gay-marriage bill Wyoming’s Senate voted 16-14 March 2 to kill a bill banning recognition of same-sex marriages entered into in other states and nations. The bill was designed to counteract a state law that recognizes legal marriages from other states and countries. Wyoming lawmakers also recently killed a proposal to amend the state constitution to ban same-sex marriage.

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FOR MORE INFORMATION ON CLASSES CATERING AND CULINARY PARTIES: www.EcoleDijonCookingSchool.com chefdrewe@aol.com 801-278-1039 M a r c h 1 7, 2 0 1 1   |   i s s u e 1 7 6   |   Q S a l t L a k e   |   7


Qmmunity

LOCal news

Ogden City Council to reconsider ordinances after threat of veto The Ogden City Council voted last week to pass two anti-discrimination ordinances that would protect against bias based on sexual orientation and gender identity in the workplace and housing. However, Mayor Matthew Godfrey threatened to veto the bills. The council did not have enough votes to override the veto, which is why the council reconsidered the ordinances on Tuesday night. As of press time, there was no consensus among the city council members and the fate of the ordinances was still undetermined. For up to date news on these ordinances and other stories, go to QSaltLake.com. The bills passed in a 4–3 vote and Godfrey said he would veto the ordinances unless there is an exemption for those that claim a religious belief while discriminating. He also said he would require that the city be exempt from the ordinances. Currently, there are exemptions for small businesses, landlords with four or fewer housing units and religious organizations. “This is a colossal waste of all of our time,” Godfrey said. “I’m sorry, but we just have a different opinion.” The city council would need five votes to override a veto by the mayor, which is why the ordinances were reconsidered on Mar. 15. The reconsideration of the bills is an opportunity to garner more support for

the bills and show all of Utah that the Ogden government wants to protect all of their residents, said Equality Utah Executive Director Brandie Balken. “The councilmembers are having a lot of discussions with all parties involved,” said Balken. “The ordinances are going to be reconsidered in order to give the city council another opportunity to give the ordinances more support.” Godfrey stressed that he has been clear about his opposition to the bills unless it exempts people that believe it is their religious right to discriminate. He said that people should not be fined by the government for expressing their religious beliefs. If exemptions are made to appease religious people, not just religious organizations, he said he could support the bill. “All the changes that were made (to the bills) were made in favor of the LGBT community and did not listen at all to the other side,” Godfrey said. “Good public policy is well rounded.” Councilmembers Bart Blair, Susie Van Hooser, Amy Wicks and Caitlin Gochnour voted to pass the ordinances in the first vote. Councilmembers Brandon Stephenson, Neil Garner and Doug Stephens voted against the measure in the first vote. Blair said that he supports the bills be-

cause he wants to help protect a young and growing workforce in Ogden. “This ordinance affects a talented and educated section of our community,” Blair said. “This ordinance is long overdue. I wish we could have done it sooner.” Stephens said that he could not support the ordinance for a variety of reasons, one of which is that landlords have the right to discriminate against people based on sexual orientation and gender identity. “I think they have a certain amount of privileges and rights with their property. I don’t think they need to discriminate but they do have the right,” Stephens said. Similar bills have been passed in 11 other Utah municipalities and the bills have been publicly supported by the Mormon Church. Godfrey would be the first Utah mayor to veto such a bill. The bill currently has exemptions for religious organizations, companies with 15 or fewer employees and landlords with four or fewer rental units. This is an election year for the mayor. Ogden residents will have the chance to elect a new mayor in November. Godfrey has not yet announced whether or not he will be running, however, the deadline to register for candidacy is not until later this summer. He has been mayor since 2000 and when he ran for reelection in 2007 he did not announce his candidacy until late in the campaign season.  Q Mayor Godfrey can be emailed at ­­mayor@­ogdencity. com. City Councilmembers can be contacted at ­citycouncil@ogdencity.com

Pride Softball League celebrates 17 years By Brad Di Iorio

Preparing for its 17th season, the Pride Softball League, Salt Lake City’s gay and lesbian softball league, is now forming teams and taking player registration for the 2011 summer season. Team registration closes March 21, and individual player registration continues March 17, at Club Try-Angles, and March 20, at Bonwood Bowl. Potential players that miss these dates may register for a team up to the middle of the season. “Every year we have people contact us too late in the season to get on a team,” said Jarrod Ames, one of three league commissioners this year. “The cost to register a team is $465. Additionally, there is a $10 ‘player fee’ to make the team eligible for anything sponsored by Pride Softball League.” Most teams will be returning including some of the new teams that were formed by players last year. Again this year, plans include three divisions; the Olympus, or ‘A’ division, the Wasatch, or ‘B’ division, and the recreational ‘C’ division, or Oquirrh. Depending on how many players participate this year, each division will consist of four to five teams that will play each other and other teams in the league. Ames says that there are 15 teams signed up right now. “Individual players seeking a team to play with need to e-mail us at psl@prideleague. com with the following information: name, sex, contact information and positions they

can play,” Ames said. “This information is placed on the Individual Player list and given to coaches who need to fill positions. There are generally enough individuals interested to form at least one [new] team to participate in the league.” Players are responsible for their own equipment, and attending practices leading up to their team’s games. Each team may also have team dues but each team is responsible for team uniform and hats. Opening day is tentatively April 10th, depending on weather. “The league has become so popular we no longer fit on Jordan Park’s single field,” Ames said. “This season we will be playing on the three fields at Sunnyside Park.” Sunnyside Park is located at 1600 E. 840 South, in Salt Lake City and games will be played on Sundays, as in the past. Everyone is welcome to play, regardless of ability and experience, gender and age. Teams will hold practices, and encourage and teach players the sport, if a potential player is new or hasn’t played softball in years. Team camaraderie and making new friends in a competitive or semi-competitive atmosphere are the benefits of joining the

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Film & Panel on Christianity and homosexuality The Cathedral Church of St. Mark’s Library Committee, Tull Lecture Series, will be screening of the documentary For the Bible Tells Me So. After the film, a panel will discuss the Christian interpretation of the Bible concerning homosexuality. The award-winning documentary follows the experiences of five American Christian families. The panel includes two people that have been in long-term gay relationships and other allies. They will discuss the challenges and observations of being gay in a conservative Christian community. WHEN: Film showing April 2, 6:30 p.m., panel discussion April 3, 1 p.m. WHERE: St. Mark’s Cathedral INFO: Camille Biexei; biexei@gmail.com

Oh No They Didn’t! The Utah Stonewall Democrats will host a panel discussion on the 2011 legislative session. The panel will include elected state Democrats. Appetizers and non-alcoholic beverages will be provided. The restaurant will also have special rates on house beer, wine and well cocktails. WHEN: March 26, 4–6:30 p.m. WHERE: Market Street in Cottonwood 2985 E. 6580 South COST: A suggested donation of $20. INFO: UtahStonewalldems.org

Pride Festival Needs Volunteers

league and participating in summer league play, Ames said. This year, Pride Softball League will participate in the Utah Pride parade and a surprise celebrity guest is scheduled to make an appearance with their entry. A new event is in the works tentatively called ‘Gay Day with The Salt Lake Bees.’ Sponsors of teams or the league are still needed. “Pride Softball League is selling vouchers good for the best seat available at any Salt Lake Bees home games, other than fireworks nights,” Ames said. “These are $10 each and can be purchased by contacting psl@prideleague.com.”  Q For more information, go to prideleague.com. The Pride League is a part of Salt Lake City Gay Athletic Association and checks need to be made out to this entity for team and player registration. Photo courtesy of Pride Softball Leauge

Volunteer leaders are instrumental in coordinating all aspects of the Utah Pride Festival. Leadership roles are needed for areas such as food, logistics and entertainment. Applicants should have previous volunteer and management or logistical experience. You must be over 21 for leadership positions. Apply: utahpridecenter.org.

20

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2011 legislative wrap-up By Seth Bracken

In a session of some possible threats to equal rights for gay and transgender Utahns, the legislative session was seen as a success by some. While no major ground was made, there have been some discussions and progress, said Brandie Balken, executive director of Equality Utah. “While the bills we supported were not passed, we’ve still made some great progress,” Balken said. While no great steps forward in gay rights legislation were made, there were also no anti-gay bills that were passed, she said. Some steps were taken to push for gay rights legislation that had never been taken in Utah, , 6:30 3, 1 p.m. such as introducing an anti-discrimination bill in the Senate instead of the House. al

gmail.com Anti-discrimination bill The push for a state-wide measure protecting employees and tenants against discrimirats will nation based on gender identity and sexual the 2011 orientation failed to even make it to a committee in the Senate. This was the first year nel will the bill was introduced in the Utah Senate. ocrats. The bill was stuck in the rules commitlic bevertee in the Senate for nearly three weeks beestauates on fore a vote was finally scheduled to move cocktails. it to the judiciary committee where public comment would be heard. The committee .m. voted 5-2 to keep the bill, and not allow a public hearing or comment. South “We have a process here where people on of $20. can create bills and then they are sifted. org We will not hear every bill,” Sen. Margaret Dayton, R-Orem, said. “There doesn’t seem to be the interest in rules committee to lift it out.” Bill sponsor Sen. Ben McAdams, D-Salt umental Lake City, appealed to the full Senate body of the to move the bill forward and open it up for ship such as public discussion. However, that measure failed in a 21-7 vote along party lines. nment.

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evious LaVar Christensen t or logis- At the beginning of the legislative session be over Rep. LaVar Christensen, R-Sandy, introduced three bills that were not labeled or g. explicitly targeted at the gay community. However, many gay-rights activists, lobbyists and other representatives saw these bills as a direct threat to gay rights. In what was deemed one of the biggest t behind victories for gay-rights legislation in Utah rder of a for the year, all three of these bills were part of later pulled by the sponsor. In 2004, Chrisleeh’ or tensen introduced the bill that later came to sculine be known as Amendment 3, which defined Lydia marriage as a union between one man and ssion af- one woman in the Utah constitution. ar-round The first bill he sponsored in this sesin gaysion added a religious exemption to antiema. discrimination bills. This would have attempted to usurp federal authority and it 6 E. 900 would have gutted the 11 anti-discrimination bills passed in Utah municipalities, said Balken.

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The second bill introduced by Christensen would have voided all contracts that are against public policy. While no clear intent was stated, the bill could have been interpreted to void wills and other contracts between same-sex couples, Balken said. The last bill Christen introduced stated that state agencies would have to focus on promoting families with a husband, wife and children. While this bill lacked any clear specifications as well, it could have been interpreted to block families with same-sex couples from participating in government programs, Balken said.

Second-parent adoptions One of the few gay rights bills that made it to a committee hearing, a measure to allow for second parent adoptions was killed in a 5-1 vote. The lone supporter, Sen. Luz Robles, D-Salt Lake City, was not the only Democrat on the committee. Sen. Pat Jones, D-Holladay, voted against the measure. “My own personal belief is that marriage should be between one man and one woman,” Jones said during the hearing. “I also believe that children are better with married couples.” Many gay rights activists criticized Jones for siding with her Republican colleagues. “Shame, shame, shame. You are a leader in the Democratic Party in the legislature — we expect more of you than Senator Buttars. Your reckless vote has hurt a lot of people to their very core,” wrote Equality Utah co-founder Jim Dabakis. Opponents to the bill said it was just one step closer to same-sex marriage. If Utah passes the bill, it is likely that gay-rights opponents could use it as an excuse to push for legal marriage recognition said Gayle Ruzicka, president of the Utah Eagle Forum. The bill would have allowed a parent to designate a second parent for their children and would not require that the two parents be married. This bill would have allowed same-sex couples to adopt children.

HIV Testing for alleged sex offenders A bill which would require alleged sex offenders to be tested for HIV passed through both the House and Senate with very little debate. The bill allows victims of sexual assault to request that their alleged attackers be tested for HIV before a conviction is made. The bill is designed to help a victim of sexual assault know whether he or she has been exposed to the HIV virus, said the sponsor of the bill, Rep. Richard Greenwood, R-Roy. It would allow the victim an opportunity to choose whether or not to begin taken drugs to stop the virus. These drugs can sometimes have adverse side effects such as nausea and fatigue. However, the ACLU of Utah strongly

opposes the bill based on constitutional issues. The bill would invade someone’s privacy and not only disclose that information to the police, but also to the public, said Marina Lowe, with the Legislative and Policy Council of the ACLU of Utah. The bill also could have some unintended consequences if the wrong person is accused and a full trial is unable to be conducted, Lowe said. “Just because a victim of sexual assault thinks a defendant is guilty, doesn’t actually mean that person is,” Lowe said. “If someone tests negative, and is later found to be innocent. The victim could have chosen to not take the medication while the real perpetrator is positive. This scenario could result in the unnecessary infection of a victim.” Also, many health officials have expressed concern because anti-body HIV tests are not always accurate. There is a six-month window between the time someone is exposed to the virus and when it will appear on a test, said Nicholas Rupp, the public information specialist for the Salt Lake Valley Health Department.

Liquor Law Changes A bill passed through the House and Senate with very little debate or opposition will bring more liquor licenses to restaurants,

change liquor service times in restaurants and eliminate the sale of mini-kegs. The bill also outlawed daily drink specials. The bill was designed to make people eat when they drink and discourage people from overdrinking, said the bill’s sponsor, Sen. John Valentine, R-Orem. The bill would add 40 available restaurant licenses; 15 full-liquor licenses and 25 beer and wine licenses. The measure also created an unlimited amount of licenses for restaurants that wanted to serve only beer. The bill, which is 174 pages long, also has many other stipulations, some of which include the following: • Drinks can be purchased by the glass in hotels from room service. • The bill prohibits events from selling or furnishing an indefinite or unlimited number of alcoholic drinks for a fixed price. This essentially kills the current functioning of the City Weekly Beer Fest. • Gives the governor the responsibility of appointing the chair of Alcoholic Beverage Control Commission. • Increases the number of officers to enforce drunken driving laws. The state budget also calls for major cuts to the Department of Alcoholic Beverage Control. The state will be closing 13 Utah liquor stores. The budget requires the DABC to cut $1.6 million and would also change store hours so they close at 7 and 8 p.m. instead of 10 p.m. Approximately 150 people will lose their jobs with the cuts. All of the stores that are closing reported earnings last year. Q

Vandals target openly gay candidate at SUU Campaign posters for an openly gay student-government candidate were vandalized with gay slurs on the Southern University of Utah campus. Payden Adams was running for the activities vice president position, which he lost by 12 votes. He was the first openlygay candidate running for a position on the Student Association Executive Council at SUU. However, Adams had been facing vandalism since the campaign began. The vandalism started early in the campaign said SUU’s Queer-Straight Alliance President Benjamin Smith. At first a few posters and fliers were shredded and taken down. But when vandalized posters were found with the words, “Fag” and “Homo” written in red ink, the vandals had gone way too far, Smith said. “This is obviously directed at (Adams) because no one else’s campaign materials were tampered with or vandalized,” Smith said. “This is madly disturbing and an obvious attack on Payden. He did not make his sexuality an issue in the campaign, but everyone who knows him knows that he is gay. Despite the attacks, Adams said he was

even more energized about the campaign. “This doesn’t discourage me at all. It makes me want to be stronger and makes me even more passionate about making SUU a better place,” Adams said. He told QSaltLake that he still had high hopes to win the election. “I don’t think I ever really felt physically threatened,” he said. “But it is scary not knowing who is doing all of this. I would much rather they approached me in the open.” This is not the first time bigotry has been an issue at SUU. Two years ago Queer-Straight Alliance posters were also vandalized.

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LOCal news

Buttars retires Sen. Chris Buttars, R-West Jordan, announced his immediate retirement from the Utah Legislature early Friday morning. Buttars made the announcement from the Senate floor shortly after the gavel fell and the 2011 session closed. He has had a variety of health issues in the recent past, and so has his wife. “I believe freedom must always be defended on every front, as there are people and ideologies that seek to undermine, devalue, and outright destroy our Constitutional freedoms,” Buttars said in his retirement announcement. “I only hope the next person fills this chair has the same fire of freedom in their belly.” Buttars sponsored many bills throughout his tenure as a legislator. However, one of his most well-known efforts, and victories, was when he helped Rep. La Var Christensen, R-Sandy, to sponsor Amendment 3, which defined marriage in the Utah constitution between one man and one woman. Perhaps Buttars’ most famous com-

ments came in 2009 when he was being interviewed for a documentary about the Mormon Church’s involvement with Proposition 8 in California. He referred to gays as “the meanest buggers I have ever seen,” and said they are “Probably the greatest threat to America going down I know of.” Before making the comments against the gay community, he also received criticism when he referred to a bill he didn’t like as this “baby is black, it is a dark and ugly thing,” Many critics saw his comments as racist and offensive. Buttars acknowledged that he has taken a tough approach to governance where he would tell his constituents where he stood on the issues, but he did not want to hear other people’s opinions. “It served me well, but I’ve been in a hell of a lot of trouble,” Buttars said. A close friend of Buttars and president of the Utah Eagle Forum defended Buttars’ legacy to the Salt Lake Tribune. “He’s one of the kindest people, but he took on the hard issues and when you stand that

Salt Lake City’s domestic registry falls out of style

By Seth Bracken When Salt Lake City Mayor Ralph Becker suggested creating a domestic partnership registry in Salt Lake City, he’d only held the office for a few days. The registry he suggested was designed to allow private employers the chance to provide benefits to same-sex partnerships. The city councilmembers agreed with him and unanimously approved the registry in February, 2008. The registry allows

sanctity of marriage Cedar City man pleads guilty to murdering wife A 25-year-old Utah man was sentenced to 15 years for murdering his wife, claiming he was trying to wrestle a gun from her. Police found the 19-year-old woman on the bathroom floor next to a cigarette with a lighter in her hand. She had been shot five times in the head.

Husband kills wife for not paying cable bill A New York City woman died from the injuries she sustained after her husband

access to all city facilities as if the pair was married. It also allows the partners visitation rights within all Salt Lake City health care facilities. However, before anyone could register to be domestic partners, the Utah Legislature jumped into debate whether or not that violated the Utah ban on gay marriage. Sen. Chris Buttars, R-West Jordan, introduced a bill which would have prohib-

beat her for not paying the premium cable channel bills while he was hospitalized. He was arrested on assault charges, but the charges were later upgraded to murder.

Michelle Ghent, filed for divorce. This was Howard’s third marriage, but second wife. He married Morrie McCommas twice and had three children with her.

FLDS man pleads guilty to sex charges in marriage to underage cousin

Salt Lake City man stabs girlfriend with Samurai sword

A St. George man was pleaded guilty to charges after he was “spiritually married” to his 14-year-old cousin. After pleading guilty to charges he was sentenced to probation.

Terrence Howard’s bliss lasted a year After only a year of marriage, actor Terrence Howard’s wife,

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Police arrested a 32-year-old man in Salt Lake City after his girlfriend was stabbed with a Samurai sword in the abdomen. She was in critical condition, but is expected to live. The woman called 911 and told responders she had been stabbed by her boyfriend. The paramedics found her lying in the street.

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Best to Money’s

  The Ot   Off Tra   Baylea

  ______

Best Aft

  Off Trax   The Pie   Baylea

  ______

Best Sou

  Red Igu   Rio Gra   Frida B   Loco Li

  ______ Sen. Chris Buttars during an interview with Reed Cowan for 8: The Mormon Proposition strong for what you believe in, he’s a very righteous man, so he’s a target,” Ruzicka told the Tribune. “He just always stood strong for moral values.” Republican delegates from his district ited Utah municipalities and counties from having any registry other than marriage registries. The bill would also invalidate any and all pre-existing registries. While Buttars acknowledged that the registry did not violate the Utah constitution explicitly, he said it violated the spirit of the laws. Of course, that was also the year that Buttars referred to an education bill as a “black baby” and called it a “dark, ugly thing.” What shreds of credibility he had left were not enough to push the bill through and instead a compromise bill was reached. The compromise bill said that the registries could exist, except the municipalities could not use the words “domestic partnership.” “The purpose of (SB299) is to reaffirm marriage under Amendment 3 and to prevent municipal registries from creating a marriage look-alike,” House sponsor Rep. Kevin Garn, R-Layton told the Salt Lake Tribune. Garn later resigned from the legislature after admitting to sitting nude in a hot tub with an underage girl. Becker and the city council chose to call the registry the Mutual Commitment Registry and it began taking applicants on April 17, 2008. The first couple to register was Brandie Balken, executive director of Equality Utah, and her partner, Lisa LeDuc. In the first year of registering couples, 43 partnerships signed up in the registry. However, after that, registration dropped off, said Christine Meeker, the Salt Lake City Recorder. In 2009, only 12 couples signed the registry and in 2010, 13 couples register with the city, she said.

PHOTO: DAVID DANIELS

Best Con Restaur

  Meditri will meet to select Buttars’ replacement.   Metrop Franck’ The selection will have to be approved by   Bamba the governor. However, it is very unlikely   that the Gov. Gary Herbert, a Republican,  ______ would oppose the chosen replacement.

Best in P

  Bandit’ “We have a lot of companies in Utah that   Riverho Wahso offer domestic-partnership benefits and a   lot of times those companies want a cer-  ______ tificate to show the partnership,” Meeker Best Asi said. “However, the registry is only for   Sapa citizens of Salt Lake. If you live in Kearns,   Thai Ga J Wong or you live in West Valley, that’s not going    ______ to work.” Many gay people are not aware of the Best Veg benefits of registering with the city, said   Omar’s Kamrin Carver, one of the QSaltLake wed-   Sage’s   Evergre ding winners. “When we went downtown to register,  ______ the woman in charge helped us understand everything that we would benefit by having this registry,” Carver said. “I was shocked. I had no idea all of that was pos- Best Cup sible in Utah.”   Diva’s Mini’s Registering with the city and getting a   So Cup document that showed some sort of official   Schmid commitment was not only important to     Les Ma him, but also to his family.   ______ “We want our children to see that we’re a

food drin

family. We’re more than just two guys who Best Bre   Off Trax raise them,” Carver said. The Oth In order to qualify for the registry, the   Blue Pl couple must be in a committed relation-   ship, share a primary residence in Salt  ______

Lake City, be over the age of 18 and dem- Best “Ha SLP&P onstrate financial interdependence. The   Ruth’s dependence can be demonstrated by show-   Squatt ing three of the following qualifiers: A joint   The Do loan, a life insurance policy or retirement    ______ benefit account, a will designating the other partner as executor or primary ben- Best San Toaster eficiary, proof of shared responsibilities in   Robin’s a bank account, or a shared bank account.   Tin Ang The registration also has a $25 fee for pro-   cessing. Q

 ______


2011 fabby awards ballot This is your chance to vote for

restaurants Best to Get Your Money’s Worth   The Other Place   Off Trax   Bayleaf Café   _______________________

Best After Midnight   Off Trax   The Pie   Bayleaf Café   _______________________

Best South of the Border   Red Iguana   Rio Grande   Frida Bistro   Loco Lizard   _______________________

Best Contemporary O: DAVID DANIELS Restaurant

  Meditrina acement.   Metropolitan Franck’s proved by   Bambara unlikely   publican,  _______________________

ment.

who is the best in the state for our community!

Choose any of our nominees or write in your own favorite. Please complete a minimum of 10 categories and mail or fax it to us. One ballot per person please.

Best in Park City

  Bandit’s Grill Utah that   Riverhorse fits and a   Wahso ant a cer-  _______________________ ” Meeker Best Asian Food only for   Sapa n Kearns,   Thai Garden & Noodle House not going   J Wongs  _______________________ re of the Best Vegetarian/Vegan city, said   Omar’s Rawtopia Lake wed-   Sage’s Café   Evergreen House Café register,  _______________________ s underbenefit by d. “I was was pos- Best Cupcakes/Pastries   Diva’s getting a   Mini’s So Cupcake of official   Schmidt’s ortant to     Les Madeleines   _______________________ at we’re a

food & drink

guys who Best Breakfast Selection   Off Trax The Other Place istry, the   Blue Plate Diner relation-   e in Salt  _______________________

and dem- Best “Hangover” Brunch SLP&P nce. The   Ruth’s Diner by show-   Squatters rs: A joint   The Dodo etirement     _______________________ ating the

mary ben- Best Sandwiches Toasters bilities in   Robin’s Nest account.   Tin Angel e for pro- 

 _______________________

Best Pizza   SLP&P   Settebello   Stoneground  _______________________

Best Caterer

  Cuisine Unlimited   Le Croissant   Culinary Crafts  _______________________

nightlife

Best Place to Get Your Groove On   Metro   Pure   Club Try-Angles   Pachanga  _______________________

Best Place to Hook Up   Club JAM   Pure   Babylon  _______________________

Best Place to Sing Karaoke   Tavernacle   Trapp   Paper Moon   Club Try-Angles   Club JAM

 _______________________

Best Place to be Friday Nights   Pure   Club JAM   Club Try-Angles

 _______________________

Best Place to be Saturday Nights   Fusion at Metro   Club Try-Angles   Club JAM  _______________________

Best Afternoon Crowd   Club Try-Angles   Trapp   Paper Moon

 _______________________

Best Gay-Friendly Bar   W Lounge   Area 51   Tavernacle   Urban Lounge

 _______________________

Best Place for Drag Queen Sightings   Paper Moon   Third Friday Bingo   Cyber Slut Bingo   Studio 27

arts & culture

Best Local Theatre Company   Plan-B   SLAC   Pygmalion   Dark Horse Theatre   Pioneer Theatre  _______________________

Best Dance Company   Ririe-Woodbury   Odyssey   Repertory Dance   SB Dance

 _______________________

Best Play/Musical of 2010   Broadway-Avenue Q   Dark Horse Theatre-Reefer Madness   SLAC-Saturday’s Voyeur   Egyptian Theatre-Hair   SLAC-Angels in America: Millenium

 _______________________

Best Special Engagement Show in 2010   SLMC-Brothers & Sister feat. Sister Dottie   Plan-B-Radio Hour:Marathon   SLAC-Angels in America: Perestroika (reading)

 _______________________

Best Dance Program

  Sugar Space-After Dark   Odyssey-Shut Up & Dance   Repertory-Mystique   Ririe-Configurations   Sugar Space/SB Dance-Yoga Confidential

 _______________________

Best Art Gallery/Museum   UMFA   Phillips Gallery   A Gallery   Salt Lake Art Center   Utah Arts Alliance  _______________________

Best Local Visual Artist   Trevor Southey   Sandy Parsons   Troy Hunter   Derek Dyer  _______________________

shopping

Best Thrift/Consignment Clothing   Pib’s Exchange   Our Store   Decades

 _______________________

 _______________________

  Club Try-Angles   Trapp   Tavernacle

Best Thrift/Consignment - Furniture & Home Décor

Best Drink Prices

 _______________________

Best Adult Toy Store   Mischievious   Cahoots   Blue Boutique   All For Love  _______________________

Best “Elephant” Gift Store   Cabin Fever   Cahoots   Mischievious  _______________________

Best Flower Shop   Twigs   Flower Patch   Aunt Fannie’s Blooms  _______________________

Best Bookstore   Sam Weller’s   King’s English   Ken Sanders Rare Books  _______________________

Q fabulous Best QSaltLake Columnist

  Troy Williams   Ruby Ridge   Christopher Katis   Ben Williams  _______________________

Best Story of 2010   Trevor Southey’s Life in Art   My Last Shot   Living with HIV/AIDS in Utah  _______________________

Best Q Event in 2010   Fabulous Fun Bus   Annual Fabby Awards Ceremony   Cyndi Lauper in Wendover   Annual Q Lagoon Day   Q Day at Park Silly Market

 _______________________

people

Best 2010 Performance by Local Actor   David Fetzer / Boom (SLAC)   Alexis Baigue / Saturday’s Voyeur (SLAC)   Joe Debevc / She Was My Brother (Plan-B)   Luke Monday / Hair (Egyptian Theatre)  _______________________

Favorite Bartender/ Barback/Server   Jim Smith–Club Try-Angles   Brian Gordon–Club JAM   Jabe Hatch–The Trapp  _______________________

Favorite Leader of a Queer Organization

  Our Store   Now & Again   Abode

  Valaree Larabee-Pride Center   Brandie Balken-Equality Utah   Kari Beattie-sWerve   Allison Black-PFLAG Ogden

 _______________________

 _______________________

Favorite Local or State Politician   Peter Corroon   Ben McAdams   Ross Romero  _______________________

groups

Best Social Group   ROTC   Affirmation   Simply Social   Alternative Garden Club   Utah Male Naturists  _______________________

Best Political/Service Group   Equality Utah   Utah Pride Center   Utah Stonewall Democrats   PWACU  _______________________

Best Religious/Spiritual Organization   Unitarian Universalist Society   LDS Reconciliation   Queer Spirit  _______________________

Best Sports Organization   QUAC   PCSL   MWFFL   GoodTimes Bowling   Lambda Hiking Club  _______________________

services Best in Skin

  A New Day Spa   Skinworks   Dr. Douglas Woseth  _______________________

Best Massage   Pride Massage   Kevin Guzik   Massage Bodywork  _______________________

Best Real Estate Agent/ Mortgage Lender   Brad Dundas   Tony Fantis   Babs DeLay   Vernon Jemmott   Scott Alexander  _______________________

Best Tattoo/Piercing Parlor   Koi   Iris Piercing   SLC Ink Tattoo  _______________________

Best Attorney   Doug Fadel   Lauren Barros   Marva Match  _______________________

Best Pet Stylist/Daycare   Camp Bow Wow   Dog Show   Dog Mode   Dogs R Us  _______________________

Best Counseling Services   Pride Counseling   Don Austin   Linnea Smith Noyes   Terri Busch   Jim Struve  _______________________

Best Insurance Agent   Steven Fisher   Alexius Gallegos   Bella Moretti   Dan Rodriquez   Jon Jepsen

 _______________________

Best for Keeping a Roof Over Your Head   Aspen Roofing   Freedom Roofing   Wesley Green Roofing

 _______________________

other

Best Radio Station   KRCL   KCPW   X96

Best Photographer

 _______________________

  David Daniels   Brian Gordon   Laurie Kaufman-Red Dragonfly   David Newkirk  _______________________

  KUTV   FOX   KSL

Best Local News Station

 _______________________

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OURVIEWS

Question of the issue

The Legislature is out and spring is around the corner. What are you going to do now?

David Hamilton I’m going to focus on finishing my book and making it a point to make lots of “me time” this year! Camping, here I come! Boyd Petrie I’m going to submit as many GRAMA requests as I can for fishing expeditions followed by a quick trip to stock up on as much booze as I can before all liquor stores are

from the editor The nation isn’t ready for a gay president By Seth Bracken

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s the nation ready for an openly gay president? The New York Times recently posed the question in an editorial asking whether the nation would be able to consider a gay man or woman acceptable to the public. The editorial didn’t ask any questions about the preparedness of the candidate or provide any specifics about whether or not we could ever elect a gay man or woman to be president. My answer is a resounding no. If a gay president had a partner, it would be an insurmountable obstacle under the current systems of law. The union would not be recognized by the federal government. Even if the two were from a state where gay marriage is legal, the so-called Defense of Marriage Act, or DOMA, prohibits the federal government from recognizing that union. There is no way that we could ever elect a gay president. It simply is not possible. It’s not the diplomatic relationships or the complicated budgeting bills that would stop America from having a gay president. It’s the very minutia and mundane facts of everyday presidential life that would stop it. Would the president’s partner need to pay

rent to live in the White House? Would the president be able to use the tax-payer dollars to buy his partner dinner at a state event? How would the Secret Service handle a simple lover that meant nothing to the United States government in the legal sense? While these obstacles could be overcome after some extreme legislative change, it is not likely to happen in the near future. Although, President Obama took the right step in refusing to defend DOMA in appeals court after it has been repeatedly struck down by several lower courts in a handful of different cases. After the Obama administration announced that it would drop the defense of DOMA, newspaper editorial boards around the nation penned praise for the president. Also, for the first time ever, a reliable and trustworthy polling company reported that more people support gay marriage than oppose it. The poll found that 46 percent of Americans supported same-sex marriage while only 40 percent opposed it. And although popular opinion does not make truth, or even laws, it is demonstrative of how difficult it will be to earn marriage equality across the nation.

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shuttered when the Legislature reconvenes and realizes people are still drinking. After the DOMA announcement was made, the conservatives professed the pending doom of the United States. Our own Utah newspaper, the Deseret News, painted the Obama administration as the largest threat to their narrowly-defined definition of a family. Gay marriage is only legal in five states and Washington, D.C. Civil unions are recognized in seven states. There is almost no chance of same-sex marriage being recognized as an equal right in the near future. After attending QSaltLake’s same-sex wedding, the most outstanding aspect was that there really wasn’t one. The wedding had rings, vows, flowers and a reception. The cake was a delicious spice cake. The couple danced to Shania Twain. The friends and family members of the couple came to support them in their endeavors. The wedding was beautiful and executed magnificently. But it was extremely commonplace. If not for the fact that there were two tuxedos involved and no dresses, no one would have noticed anything remarkable about this ceremony. As soon as more people start seeing just how boringly similar gay couples are to straight couples, gay marriage will be as acceptable and mundane as hetero marriages. All the push around from the conservatives will be for naught and eventually gay marriage will be a norm, even in Utah. But until a kiss on national television between a male candidate and his partner after he wins the Iowa primary isn’t blurred or only shown on cable, we are stuck with straight allies in the White House. Q

Paul Johnson I’m going to Disneyland! (and I’ll stop at Trader Joe’s on the way home and illegally import cases of $3 buck chuck!) Mark Jenkins Hoping that I do not lose my job at the Liquor Store and spend many hours hik-

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Spring in Utah: life is good! Chad Taylor Going back to basics working on maintaining happiness and enjoying all the beautiful colors that spring will bring back.

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Queer gnosis

Peaceful Uprising: The Tim DeChristopher interview

re is g is rner. oing

By Troy Williams

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s environmental justice a queer issue? Of course! The time is soon coming when gay Americans will enjoy full federal equality in all 50 states. But what good is a gay marriage if we don’t have clean air or water? What good is the legal right to adopt if we don’t leave all our new gaybies with a sustainable, livable future? Climate change is a social-justice issue that should be woven in tandem with LGBT equality. With that, there is a lot we can learn from each other’s respective movements. And here in Utah we’ve got many firebrand climate activists within Peaceful Uprising, founded by the celebrated monkey-wrencher Tim DeChristopher. In December 2008 Tim famously disrupted a U.S. Bureau of Land Management oil and gas lease auction that would have sold public lands to private oil industries. He posed as “Bidder 70” and won 14 parcels near Arches and Canyonlands national parks for $1.8 million. But he didn’t intend to pay. He refused a plea deal and set out to put climate change on trial. However, Judge Dee Benson refused to allow the jury the opportunity to hear the motivations behind DeChristopher’s faux bids. He was recently found guilty of two felony charges and will be sentenced June 23. After the verdict I spoke with DeChristopher on KRCL’s RadioActive. Troy Williams: Describe how you felt when you heard the verdict.

Tim DeChristopher: Not particularly surprised. It was one that I was preparing myself for. Especially seeing the way things played out in the trial. The jury was never “The allowed to hear that the auction was overturned afterward because the government ughn admitted they weren’t following their own to enjoy laws. The jury was never allowed to hear that I did raise the money for the first paye from ment but the BLM refused to take it. The ture and verdict was a foregone conclusion at that ncenpoint because they were lacking so much ur yard. information.

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TW: Obama’s Department of Interior ultimately dismissed all the leases. TD: Right. Not because of my actions but because of the illegitimacy of the auction to begin with. They weren’t following their own standards. They didn’t do adequate environmental impact statements. It was later decided by a federal judge in Montana that the BLM was out of compliance with a

2001 law that would require them to consider the impact of climate change in natural resource development. That was why the auction was reversed but that was something we were not allowed to talk about. TW: You came out of the courtroom talking about the “finger and the fist.” TD: The ruling class promotes the view that we should look at ourselves as a little finger out there alone. That we can easily be broken. What they want us to forget is that we are not just one finger. We are connected to a hand with many fingers that can unite as a fist. What was happening inside the courtroom was an attempt to convince everyone that I was just one finger. But what was happening outside the courthouse, in the street, where people were singing all week, was a reminder that I was part of a fist. We’re not going to be broken by this. We’re not going to back down. People are not going to be intimidated into no longer fighting for a healthy and just world.

cut it. Our opponents profit from the status quo, they are very powerful and they are not going to give up with our easy activism. TW: The BP Deepwater Horizon oil spill last year devastated untold marine life and coastal livelihood, not to mention the 12 workers who lost their lives — and yet no one is being tried for that crime. Yet you have been convicted. That’s ironic. TD: Not really. The ruling class — the corporate interests that run the country — have the power to use the justice system to hold people accountable. We shouldn’t expect them to eat one of their own. They are not the force that is supposed to hold corporate tyrants accountable. (We) are the ones who are supposed to hold the ruling class accountable. It shouldn’t surprise us when one of us does something that undermines what the ruling class is doing that we are punished for it. But we should remember that it is our responsibility to turn around and hold them accountable for their attack on us. TW: You’ve built an incredible grassroots infrastructure with Peaceful Uprising.

What would you like to see happen to that organization after your sentencing? TD: There is an old Rumi poem that says “don’t go back to sleep.” There has been an awakening here. This whole process has woken a few people to the injustices of the system and to their own power to do something about it. Now don’t go back to sleep. Q (Podcast the entire interview at queergnosis.com. Get involved at Peacefuluprising.org)

TW: What impact do you think your actions have had on established environmental organizations? TD: Greenpeace and Rainforest Action Network were here to lend their support. We’ve received positive responses from 350.org. The hope is that this is stimulating discussion among the movement about what kind of risks we should be willing to take. A lot of the movement is looking for a new path. We are slowly moving toward more confrontational actions, greater levels of risk and more personal stories. A more human movement is the direction we are headed and I’m glad to see that. TW: Curtis Harring who blogs at Blueinredzion.com wrote: “The real issue is that the environmental community needs DeChristopher to be found guilty.” He continued, “The original movement has gone stale. What was easy to do has been done and the movement, to continue to be relevant, needs to continue to bring attention to the causes it feels are important.” TD: It’s certainly an unfortunate conclusion from my perspective. But I think there is a lot of truth to those statements about not just doing things that are easy. The predominant question among the environmental movement has been, “How do we achieve our goals without making real sacrifices ourselves?” That’s not going to

Speakers Panel:

David Litvak Ben McAdams Jackie Biskupski Joel Briscoe Saturday, March 26th

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LOVE We have a

OURVIEWS

the straight line The high road By Bob Henline

rose for that T

he recent Supreme Court decision in favor of the Westboro Baptist Church of Topeka, Kansas has added more fuel to the fiery debate surrounding this organization and their antics. In case you’re not aware, these are alleged Christians that protest military funerals with signs and slogans giving thanks to their god for Improvised Explosive Devices (IEDs) that claim the lives of American service personnel. The death of American personnel, they claim, is their God’s judgment upon America for the sin of homosexuality. Earlier this month the Supreme Court ruled 8-1, Justice Samuel Alito dissenting, that the actions of Westboro Baptist were protected under the First Amendment rights to free speech and assembly. I am likely to annoy more than a few of you with this statement, but here it goes: in this case, the Supreme Court of the United States did absolutely the right thing. The First Amendment is pretty damn clear on this; government shall not interfere with free speech. Over the past 200 years there have been a few limits placed upon speech, basically to preclude slander, libel and an incitement to violence or an illegal act. But speech is protected, and so is assembly. These people, while repulsive and disgusting, are acting within their Constitutionally guaranteed rights. Would I like them to shut up? Absolutely. Will I advocate some legal means to shut them up? Not at any cost. Respecting fundamental civil liberties means that we have to allow the bad with the good. Equality means everyone must have the same rights under law, and that those rights are more important than the capricious whim of public opinion. The bottom line (or the straight line, if you prefer) is that Westboro Baptist members have not violated the law. They have not incited violence or committed slander or libel. They piss people off. They piss a lot of people off. That, however, does not nor cannot justify placing limits on their freedoms. Legal measures to silence them will only make them martyrs and provide them

I

have with additional sympathy and support. a Mo Personally, I think the best thing we, as a goo a society, can do is to let these idiots shout in an at the top of their lungs. The more they with each scream, the crazier they look and the fastabusive r er the more rational, moderate elements of I was cajo society will tune them out and stop paying after so attention. They have planted the seeds ofchange. A their own destruction, and those seeds willThe Mor continue to grow until this group becomesbecome a so marginalized as to rate not even a foot-a once-be note in the D-section of a local paper. In thehad depa process of doing so, they will push increas- When I ing numbers of rational, moderate peoplety, Calif. ground z in the direction of equality. If we abandon our fundamental values inmovemen such as t order to stifle the rights God, and of these bigots, what does few. Drug that say about us, as aized, coul people? What does that“turning say about how true weenlighten are to the values of lib-did not do erty and equality? Thisroll, if no nation was built upon themost of m ideals of equality and lib-in 1972. W erty, that we are all equalwar even under the law and that werevealed. the guns all deserve the same libwere still erties and the same prous that n tections. Love and No, we don’t alwayswas over hold to those principlesI had lost in our legal decisions, My gen nor do we do so in ourof a mov individual decisions asI think t members of society. History is replete withspiritual examples of discrimination and inequality.another a These battles are still being fought to thisthis time Harrison day, and will continue to be fought well Lord” and into the future. it In the S I can’t speak for everyone involved inTestamen the fight for equality, but I can say this forChristian myself. To me, equality means everyone.monk, an I don’t see how we can say that we standan LDS In for equality and liberty while attempting My aff fold. Firs to deny that right to others. I firmly believe that our society is onCypress the brink of fundamental change. The in-the fanta creased resistance and “fringe-lunatic”Lamanite a trip.” B behavior by certain elements only serves ism had a to show how desperate they really are. TakAs hairb ing the high road and demonstrating love, kids all s compassion, and a true commitment to aence that free and equal society is what will finallycertainly bring about that change. I urge you all toGod, not stay on that high road. Q and were

In this case, the Supreme Court of the United States did absolutely the right thing

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e

lambda lore I was Mormon, once By Ben Williams

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have a confession to make. I was once pport. a Mormon. I was 21 years old. It wasn’t ng we, as a good fit for me, or for them, but as ots shout in any bad relationship we had put up more they with each other; until I chose to end the d the fastabusive relationship. No matter how much ements of I was cajoled, threatened, or guilt-tripped, op paying after so many years, I was not going to e seeds ofchange. And I knew God was OK with that. seeds willThe Mormon Church for me had simply becomesbecome as Evlyn Waugh wrote, much like en a foot-a once-beloved wife for whom all affection per. In thehad departed. h increas- When I was a young man, Orange Counte peoplety, Calif., where I spent my youth, was ground zero for a hippie-youth revival movement. There were several factions values in such as the Jesus freaks, the Children of he rights God, and the Hara Krishna’s to name a what does few. Drugs, sex and rock ‘n’ roll, we realus, as aized, could only do so much. People began does that“turning on” to an inward form of spiritual true weenlightenment, much of it fueled by LSD. I es of lib-did not do drugs, but had plenty of rock ‘n’ ity? Thisroll, if not as much sex as I liked. But like upon themost of my generation, I was disillusioned y and lib-in 1972. We could not get Nixon to stop the all equalwar even after the Pentagon Papers were nd that werevealed. In fact, Nixon had even turned the guns on us at Kent State. Body bags same libwere still piling up. Charlie Manson taught ame prous that not all hippies were into “Peace Love and Happiness.” The Summer of Love t alwayswas over. The Beatles had broken up. And rinciplesI had lost at love. ecisions, My generation always wanted to be part o in ourof a movement greater than ourselves. isions asI think that defines Baby Boomers. The plete withspiritual revival of the early 70s was yet nequality.another attempt to change the world but ht to thisthis time by changing ourselves. George Harrison, former Beatle, sang “My Sweet ught well Lord” and Norman Greenbaum sang “Spirit In the Sky.” In college I began to take Old volved inTestament classes taught by a Rabbi, early y this forChristianity classes by a Greek Orthodox everyone.monk, and a Book of Mormon class from we standan LDS Institute instructor. tempting My affinity for Mormonism was twofold. First all the gay kids I had known at ety is onCypress College were Mormons. Second, e. The in-the fantastical world of the Nephites and -lunatic”Lamanites were, as we use to say, “such a trip.” Being a history major, Mormonly serves ism had a curious freaky attraction to me. are. TakAs hairbrained as it appeared, the LDS ting love,kids all seemed to have a Gnostic experiment to aence that I wanted for myself. They were ill finallycertainly not as cultist as the Children of you all toGod, not as annoying as the Jesus freaks, and were within the perimeters of my own

Christian heritage. Plus all the Mormons I had known in California were kind and good people. When I began to have LDS-missionary lessons I was hooked. I had no belief in the theology of Mormonism but I did have an immense attraction to the missionaries and the sincere naivety of these cute guys from Utah. I know I must have flummoxed them with questions like,“Does God have a bowel movement if he has a physical body?” But they just smiled, humored me, and gave me that much more of their undivided attention. I must admit that when I agreed to be baptized I chose the cutest of the pair to baptize me. The gay part of me knew I would see him naked afterward when we changed out of our wet duds. I guess I should have known then that I was not exactly what the church wanted in a neophyte. Perhaps the real reason I joined the Mormon Church was not a burning in my bosom, but rather a desire to extinguish the burning in my loins. I secretly hoped the “Mormon gospel” would be just-theticket for overcoming my more “grave and abominable” flaws. I was a conflicted young man. After joining the Mormon Church, and a stint as a youth counselor at a YMCA summer camp, I changed my name to “Ben,” meaning son, to reflect the new me. My family was less than thrilled that I had joined the Mormons. I was sworn to secrecy so as not to bring shame to the family. My former heathen friends laughed and eventually turned away from me as beyond redemption — lost to religious insanity. Looking back now, they were right. It was a form of insanity. So desperate was I not to be gay that I was willing to sublimate my former identity to an abusive dogma. I never do things in moderation. I am an extremist. Always have been. Always will be. So when my family and friends ostracized the fanatically new me, I had to leave. Like Mormon pioneers before, I put my shoulder to the wheel and moved along to Zion. Having only my BYU admission slip, a pillow and suitcase in hand, I boarded my Greyhound handcart expecting to have a “marvelous work and a wonder” waiting for me. After a 14-hour bus trip through all the hamlets and villages of Utah I reached Provo at 5:30 a.m. It was pitch black outside and bone-numbingly cold. It was Jan. 8, 1973. Stowing my stuff in a bus-station locker I proceeded out into the cold. Trudging up Provo’s icy sidewalks, as I encountered

people, I would ask “Is this the right way to BYU?” Finally after about a two-mile walk and climbing the steep escarpment, I set foot on the Brigham Young University campus for the first time. After saying a prayer of gratitude I asked for directions to the Wilkerson Center where I was to register, being as I was a day late. Finding a place to live would have to come later. The Wilkerson Center always smelled like cinnamon rolls and sex to me. It smelled inviting. Waiting for registration to open I wandered to the east of the building and nearly fell down as the sun peaked over the Wasatch and I saw the mountains for the first time! I never knew Utah had mountains. They were majestic, towering, breathtaking and formidable. As lack of sleep and road weariness caught up with me, I went and stood dutifully in line because that is what college students do most, stand in line. In my heart I was so overjoyed that I had the wherewithal to leave all that I knew behind to become a stranger in a strange land. That had to count for something. Standing in line however, I felt that “all was not well.” Two suited men in their mid 20s were pacing up and down the registration line. Hands clasped behind their backs they seemed to be searching for something or someone. Upon stopping at me, my heart

sank. Oh no! They have the power of discernment and they know my dark past. Beads of sweat trickled down my neck as one scowled at me, “You’re a borderline case.” Then to my utter relief he barked, “Your hair touches your ears. Get a haircut.” That was it? I gushed “I will! I will!” After them telling me where the BYU barbershop was, I rushed downstairs and paid for a BYU trim. My first purchase at BYU. Then I dutifully stepped back in line where I now was compliant. This was my first encounter with the guardians of BYU standards. It would not be my last. But so happy was I at the moment to belong to something greater than myself that I did not immediately realize the lesson learned that frosty morning. While God may look upon the inward heart, BYU was all about outward appearances. Like many other insulated young people attending BYU, I was too immature, too fragile, to sustain any sufficient scrutinizing of its emphatic rules. BYU, in 1973, was a LDS-religious institution maintained to support the dogma of the LDS in a tightly controlled LDS environment. Little did I know that BYU would become for me, and others like me, simply an institute of terror. Q

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’m sure glad my last name isn’t Santorum. For one thing, I wouldn’t want to be related to Rick Santorum. For another thing, his name means “The frothy mix of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex.” And that’s the first thing that pops up on Google. Santorum’s “Google problem,” as it has been dubbed in the media lately, is something he brought on himself when he compared gays getting married to manon-dog sex. Shortly thereafter, a reader of Dan Savage’s “Savage Love” column suggested coining “Santorum” as a sex term. Savage obliged. And “santorum” was born. In 2007 Santorum was voted out of his U.S. Senate seat and we didn’t hear much from him. But he’s back with his eye on being President Frothy-Mix-of-Lubeand-Fecal-Matter of the United States, and that making sure gays and lesbians aren’t allowed to marry is still one of his biggest concerns. Needless to say, President Obama’s recent decision to stop defending the Defense of Marriage Act in court because it’s unconstitutional has riled Santorum. In a March 4 column for the Des Moines Register, Santorum wrote, “Intellectually, morally, and constitutionally President Obama’s claim is absurd. And it is a dagger aimed at the heart of a core constitutional value: the free exercise of religion.” This is, of course, not true. The anti-gay right has been crying about how treating gays equally is akin to banning God and demanding everyone worship Perez Hilton. No one is advocating locking pastors up or turning churches into gay bars. What Santorum is really arguing for isn’t the freedom of religion; it’s the freedom to discriminate and the freedom to legislate using an anti-gay “morality” code based on religion. Oddly, to defend his argument he used the example of Catholic Charities in Boston who stopped doing adoptions be-

cause they didn’t want to grant adoptions to gays. According to The Boston Globe, “(Catholic Charities decided) to abandon its founding mission, rather than comply with state law requiring that gays be allowed to adopt children.” Mind you, the state wasn’t forcing Catholic Charitiesof my life to hand over all of the babies to a pil-brainwas Mormon laging gay mob. The state was saying, K. Packer “Look, you can’t judge a parent unfit just hateful w because he or she is a homo.” That was, als are obviously, too muchpedophil to ask, and the orga-nographe nization chose dogma“being h over kids who neededthe next w help. murder.” “With the redefini- So, on tion of marriage, re-ine my s ligious groups of alllion whe types will be forcedthis extr to make the sameentered type of choice — getreality, out of the businesstainted s of helping people orhistories compromise yourbroke me For ins constitutionally proI slept wi tected convictions,” I couldn Santorum wrote. somethin Let me get this cause we straight: if gays are treated equally thena dimens religions of all kinds will abandon socialI wanted services? Like the local church-run soupand espec kitchen won’t give out soup anymore The gu because they don’t want to give soup tofull-on pr gays? It’s as if the only thing between theand slept teachings of, say, Jesus and abject indif-walls of ference to human suffering and need isbut with homosexuality. So long as religious orga-experienc nizations can discriminate against gays,sequence all is right with the world. Makes perfect After l sense. In his column Santorum charitably added, “I believe if two adults of the same sex want to have a relationship that is their business. But when they ask society to give that relationship special recognition and privileges, then we should be able to have a rational debate about whether that is good public policy.” Aww, isn’t that sweet? Santorum thinks gays deserve to mind their own business. So long as they aren’t asking to be treated fairly, everything’s cool. As for the “have a rational debate” part, that’s pretty suspect coming from someone who thinks a man having sex with his husband is the same as a man fucking a dog. Q

‘Treating gays equally is akin to banning God and demanding everyone worship Perez Hilton’

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lipstick lesbian A Christian sexual rebellion

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By H. Rachelle Graham

doptions on Globe, y 20’s were full of sexual misabandon takes. n comply It might have something to ays be aldo with living the first 19 years you, the Charitiesof my life with Christian oppression and to a pil-brainwashing of the extreme kind — the Mormon kind. As Dallin H. Oaks and Boyd s saying, K. Packer clearly show with their vile and unfit just hateful words that they believe homosexuThat was, als are worse than oo much pedophiles and porthe orga-nographers, and that se dogma“being homosexual is o neededthe next worst thing to murder.” redefini- So, one can imagriage, re-ine my sexual rebelps of alllion when I got out of e forcedthis extreme cult and he sameentered the world of ce — getreality, but with all businesstainted shame-ridden eople orhistories, mine had e yourbroke me into pieces. For instance, when ally proI slept with a woman, ictions,” I couldn’t shake the feeling I had done rote. something wrong. With a man, I felt evil beget this cause we weren’t married but there wasn’t ally thena dimension that existed currently where on socialI wanted to marry a man, even in heaven run soupand especially not the Salt Lake Temple. anymore The guilt finally left me but turned into e soup tofull-on promiscuity. I became a wild-child ween theand slept with anything that moved. The ect indif-walls of a sheltered existence crumbled, d need isbut with my lack of sex education and life ous orga-experience, I didn’t seem to realize the connst gays,sequences. es perfect After learning of a woman I actually

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knew being diagnosed with HIV, I realized the disease wasn’t just for Third World countries and gay men. Even though she wasn’t someone I slept with, I was paranoid that I too, was infected. It took me three weeks of shaking with fear to get up the nerve to schedule an AIDS test. When I arrived at the clinic, a nurse brought me into a room and told me her name was Sue. She looked a lot more like another Angelina, and it wasn’t helping my nerves to have the second hottest girl in the universe asking me personal questions about my sexual past. “How many sexual partners have you had?” “Five,” I lied, leaning deeper into my chair and avoiding her fairy-blue eyes. I was the worst liar. The truth was I had stopped counting with fingers a few hands ago. I usually used protection, but there was a few times I got lazy and didn’t. I’d never forgive myself if I had infected someone. The nurse took a sample and left, but not before saying it would take 20 minutes. I wanted more than anything to get my hands on a time machine, as I paced back and forth in that tiny room. If someone had seen me fidgeting and hyperventilating, they would have sent me a few miles down

When I slept with a woman, I couldn’t shake the feeling I had done something wrong

to the psychiatric unit. Luckily, the doctor knocked to let me know she was coming in, so I was able to sit down fast and calm my restless legs. The doctor was average-looking, with a small belly and wire-rimmed glasses. Instead of giving me the results right away, she spent 10 minutes lecturing me on safe sex and why I need to always use protection. She even offered to demonstrate how to use a women’s condom. The offer was tempting, but I passed because I wanted to find out my result before I ran out of oxygen. “The test was negative.” Thank God. I wanted to leap out of that office and give the nurse a kiss right on the mouth.

Instead, I skirted out of the clinic, able to breathe easily for the first time in weeks. Lucky me! I vowed never again to be so careless with my body and health. As I started to use more caution with sex I spent more time alone. Oh, get your head out of the gutter. I meant I got to know the real me and learned to value myself. I became my own best friend. For the first time, when it came to dating, I focused on boundaries. Sex became an act of love and not a plea for touch and acceptance from anyone who paid attention. Sex even turned into an act that never made me feel guilty. For once in 30 years, my body became my own. Q

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haritably the same p that is ask sociecial rece should ate about cy.” antorum heir own asking to ool. debate” ing from ving sex as a man M a r c h 1 7, 2 0 1 1   |   i s s u e 1 7 6   |   Q S a l t L a k e   |   1 7


Gay WEDDINGISSUE

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For nearly t has been a food with o fantastic p outstandin

Raise a glass to the grooms It was a love for the fabulous, and perhaps most famous of all drag queens in the land, RuPaul, that started a young, burgeoning gay family. by Seth Bracken

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t the 2004 Utah pride festival, both Kamrin and Manuel went to see the fierce drag queen perform. The couple that met on that hot summer night had no idea at the time they would be sharing a life: Living together after three months, buying a house after a year and a half, and kids after three years. Not too many people can honestly say that RuPaul started, or saved their lives, but Kamrin can. “I don’t know where I’d be without Manuel,” Kamrin said. “He literally saved my life.” As the two pronounced their vows to one another, promising to commit to each other through the good times, and the bad, the couple culminated a series of promises, commitments and made a new set of promises. One of those promises was symbolized by 13 gold coins. “As I count out the 13 coins and place them in the groom’s hands they also represent different values that the couple desire to share between themselves: love, harmony, cooperation, commitment, peace, happiness, trust, respect, caring, wisdom, joy, wholeness and nurturing,” said Rev. Nicole Merges of the Oneness Center for Spiritual Living, who performed the ceremony. The couple celebrated their new level of commitment and unity. “We want everyone at the wedding to know how happy we are,” Manuel said. “We wanted the entire wedding to be a big celebration. It’s a party for us.” And party they did. The wedding program included a full choir, several musical guests and a string quartet. The wedding reception had multiple featured musical numbers and belly dancing performances as well as a professional disc jockey and a full catering service. The wedding rehearsal dinner was held at The Med for some of the family members and close friends of the couple. “This really was almost exactly how we dreamed it would happen,” Kamrin said. “We have been planning our wedding for years.” The wedding planning really began when Manuel purchased a set of matching rings before the happy couple ever met. “I knew that the man for me would fit this ring,” Manuel said, as Kamrin played with the ring on his finger. And in a way, the ring did become an engagement ring of sorts. On the evening the two decided to move in together, Kamrin and Manuel tried on the rings. And of course they were as good a fit as any jeweler-fitted set.

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Croissant d The compa more than events are are for tho long confe “We pre the smalle ties, we ha And we pu as we do in The com the Wasatc No matter can help p stomach-p “We foc “That was really when the relationship technically got started,” Kamrin said. “That was our “Happy cli standing p formal commitment, I suppose.” However, seven years after that modest ring exchange in a Salt Lake restaurant, with only To schedul the waiters and the passers-by as the witnesses, the couple stood in front of hundreds and exchanged two simple bands. As the two men stood in matching tuxedos, they were married. Not in a union that the city would recognize. Or the state. But for the two of them, that wasn’t the point. “I’ve been raised my whole life to live a certain way. Get married, have kids and raise a good, healthy family,” Kamrin said. “I love Manuel and the wedding was about our commitment to ourselves and to show our kids that we are more than just two guys who are raising them.” Throughout the wedding, the beautifully arranged flowers, the reception held at the Rice Eccles Stadium Towers and the rehearsal dinner, what stood out most wasn’t the outstanding décor or music; the most interesting part was the normalcy of the wedding. Like thousands of other couples, Kamrin and Manuel chose Shania Twain’s You’re Still the One. Like thousands of other couples, they danced to the Isley Brother’s Shout. They cut the cake. They shared a toast and did everything else thousands of other couples have done. “We really wanted to take the opportunity to show our friends and family how much in love we are,” Kamrin said. “We are just like everyone else.” Q

Photography by LauriePHOTOS BY DA


It took a village

Bell-Fair Interiors

Putting on a wedding of any sort takes the help of vast people and businesses. The following helped QSaltLake and the happy couple pull off one huge event. If you plan to tie the knot or have another kind of large event, please call them up!

Le Croissant Catering

For nearly two decades, Le Croissant Catering has been a Utah staple. More than just fantastic food with only the freshest of ingredients and a fantastic presentation, the company focuses on outstanding customer service, said owner and manager Kelly Lake. “Our first and most important priority is to give our clients an event that they can be proud of,” Lake said. “We want them to be excited about the event even years after it happens.” But Le Croissant does much more than just weddings. The company has provided catering services to more than 1,000 different events. Some of the events are for small company gatherings. Others are for thousands of guests attending a weeklong conference. “We pretty much do it all,” Lake said. “From the smallest gatherings to large corporate parties, we have experience in all kinds of events. And we put just as much love into box lunches as we do into our large parties.” The company offers their services all along the Wasatch Front, Utah County and Park City. No matter the size of the gathering, Le Croissant can help plan and serve visually-pleasing and stomach-pleasing food. “We focus on a few factors,” Lake said. t was our “Happy clients, fabulous ingredients and outstanding presentation.” ith only To schedule an event or for more information go ds and to LeCroissantCatering.com.

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hotography by LauriePHOTOS BY DAVID DANIELS

David Daniels Photography Most photographers learn to take photos and then editing them is somewhat of an afterthought. While editing is important to some photographers, it definitely takes a back seat to the art of

taking the photo. For David Daniels, his photography emerges from his extensive background in photo editing and design. “When I take a photo, I am always thinking about how people could use it,” Daniels said. “When I see a great photo opportunity, I always think of the practical application.” His background in design helps him understand what a designer might look for in a photo. Also, he has a degree in psychology from BYU, and he said it helps give him an interesting perspective in taking photos. It helps him take a unique approach to photography. Daniels has been involved in photography since he first discovered Photoshop in 1995. “I sort of worked backward,” Daniels said. “I started out editing the photos and realized I would be able to start taking my own photos. I knew exactly how I would want photos to be edited, so I started to take some of my own photos.” Daniels has experience photographing everything from the most basic portrait shots, to full wedding albums. He also has photographed same-sex weddings, commitment ceremonies and many other gay-themed events. “As a gay man, I feel I need to be true to myself and my friends around me,” Daniels said. To see examples of his lifestyle and journalistic photography, go to his website, www.DavidDanielsPhotography.com. For examples of his work with weddings and same-sex ceremonies, go to DavidWeddingPhotography.com.

Tuxedos by Lee Tuxedos by Lee offers much more than the equivalent to renting your dad’s tuxedo. Every five years, these locally owned and operated stores replace their entire inventory said Meghan Roberts, the general manager. “Every one of our tuxedos is in great shape with fantastic color and they are all of the highest quality,” Roberts said. “Because we get all new inventory every five years we stay on top of all the latest fashion trends and looks.” The selection of tuxedos is enormous. With just about every color and style imaginable, there are options for everyone’s taste, Roberts said. There are two locations for Tuxedos by Lee, and within those two stores the company manages and stores their entire inventory. Many other tuxedo rental stores have to order products from out of state and other locations, Roberts said. This allows the company to accommodate large parties as well as last-minute rentals. “We keep everything here on the premises ready to go,” Roberts said. “We never have a

delay in renting a tuxedo to someone because it is not available in our stores.” “We’ve done several gay weddings and ceremonies before,” Roberts continued. “And we hope to do many, many more. Gay people can feel very comfortable when they come to our store.” For more info and pricing, TuxedosByLee.com.

Tuxedo Junction Tuxedo Junction is one of Utah premier provider of formal wear. Whether it’s for a marriage or a sleek look for that night out on the town, Tuxedo Junction has a large selection of the finest tuxedos in Utah. With a large selection of styles and fits, each tuxedo is top of the line and guaranteed to fit the customer perfectly. The company is so confident that the customers will enjoy the fit of the tuxedos, if it doesn’t fit you perfectly, the next rental is free. For more info, go to TuxedoJunctionSLC.com.

You have chosen the perfect day… now choose the perfect caterer

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David James (D.J.) Bell is much more than just a simple run-of-the-mill decorator. In fact, he is a trained architectural interior designer. And beyond graduating from one of the top interiordesign colleges in the United States he is passionate about what he does. “I got into the industry about seven years ago with some friends,” Bell said. “I decided to do it right and get an education because I felt so strongly about what I do. I love it.” Bell specializes in home interior design and helping his customers get a high-quality result without paying the high prices. He is the owner and operator of Bell-Fair Interiors. “I work with the customers to get wholesale prices and I do not charge retail fees,” Bell said. “I pass on every savings to my client.” There is no job too small or too large for Bell-Fair Interiors. From painting a room to removing walls and remodeling kitchens, Bell has experience with almost all home-design jobs. Continued on next page

This is your special day. It can happen your own special way. I am here for you Reverend George Garff

801-502-5456

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Gay WEDDINGISSUE

It took a village Continued from page 19

Also, as a trained architectural interior designer, he can help with floor plans and other technical aspects of all your remodeling needs. “I have great relationships with other contractors and specialists so that you can get the best prices while still receiving fantastic products and services,” Bell said. While he does not do all the work himself, such as painting and all electrical work, he has partnerships with other dependable companies and individuals. To contact Bell for pricing and other information, go to his website BellFairInteriors.com.

Photography by Laurie Laurie Bray has been involved in photographing same-sex weddings in Utah about as long as anyone. She took the photos of the first gay wedding announcements to appear in the Salt Lake Tribune. “It was enormously controversial at the time,” said Bray, who owns and operates Photography by Laurie. “The photo and announcement appeared in the Tribune in 1994, and it was the first one in Utah. It was amazing that the newspaper agreed to run it.” Bray, who was one wedding photographer at the wedding, has been taking photos for more than 30 years. “It really started because my dad used to take so many photos,” Bray said. “I didn’t realize it at the time, but those photos came to be so important to me later.” Bray began taking photography classes freshman year of college where she excelled and received high praise from her professors. “I finally found an art form I was good at,” Bray said. “I love finding a way to show the beauty in people. Everyone is beautiful and sometimes they don’t see it. I find a way to show them their beauty.” Bray offers her services for weddings, portraits or just about any other photography need. She also offers photography for tasteful intimate shots such as artful nudes and lingerie photos. “I feel very strongly about creating images that my customers love,” Bray said. “I want everyone to have photographs that reflect just how magical and beautiful the moment is. I want to help boost everyone’s self esteem so they can see their own beauty.” For more information, samples of her work and pricing go to PhotographyByLaurie.biz.

Carrie’s Cakes Carrie’s Cakes are more than just the top-of-theline, highest-recommended award-winning and visually stunning cakes. These wedding cakes actually taste phenomenal. “Besides a fantastic design, I make sure that all of our cakes taste as good, or better than they look,” Carrie Biggers, owner and manager. “We’re family owned and operated and you will get an intimate feeling when you come and meet with us,” Biggers said. “We like to meet with each customer so that their cake becomes as important to us as it is with them.” Biggers has been baking for most her life and helped her Salt Lake City store become known nationwide for the elegant and intricate designs. She even was a featured contestant on the TLC program, Ultimate Cake Off, where she brought home the top award for the taste competition. She was also featured in another TLC program, Outrageous Kid Parties. In addition to working well with the couple to be wed, Biggers said she has a fantastic reputation with caterers, photographers and everyone else involved with the wedding. Because the wedding cake is the center of most receptions, it’s vital that it be visually pleasing for the guests and for the other wedding participants. “We’ve worked really hard to earn and maintain that reputation of excellence,” Biggers said. Carrie’s Cakes focuses on high-end cakes and provides only the best service and quality products, Biggers said. The company specializes in butter cream and fondant cakes. For more information, visit carriescakes.com.

DJ Pauly For Paul Helms, being a disc jockey is much more than a hobby. The St. Louis native has been honing his craft since 1989 when he began working as a professional deejay. “We have an advantage over other companies,” Helms said. “We’ve performed at weddings all over the nation. We don’t do cookie-cutter receptions. We help create a great experience, not just for the couple, but for everyone there that night.” DJPauly Entertainment, owned and oper-

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ated by Helms and based in Salt Lake, provided their services at the QSaltLake wedding reception. But Helms is no stranger to being involved in the gay community and he often performs at gay weddings and ceremonies. “We’re part of the community,” Helms said. “We work with our clients to provide an atmosphere that’s fun, elegant and comfortable for everyone, regardless of sexual orientation. We don’t tell cheesy jokes or make people wear silly hats and do the YMCA. Our motto is One Day, One Party, One Dream-Come-True.” Although his main focus is on weddings, Helms also provides music and entertainment for company parties, birthdays and other special events along the Wasatch Front. He is a member of the American Disc Jockey Association and a frequent guest at the Mobile Beat DJ convention in Las Vegas. He moved to Salt Lake City in 1998 and continues to provide entertainment at events all over the United States. “Because Utah is such a beautiful state, we get a lot of calls for destination weddings,” Helms said. “And our clients appreciate that they can customize the music, announcements and introductions to their taste. We help create a fun, interactive wedding experience that their family and friends will never forget.” To book Paul or to find out more info, about DJPauly Entertainment, see DJPaulyWeddings.com.

Brown-Forman Since 1870, Brown-Forman has grown to be one of the largest liquor retailers in the United States. The company markets and sells a large variety of different well-known brands including Jack Daniel’s, Southern Comfort, Finlandia Vodka and Korbel California Champagnes. Brown-Forman is one of two wine and spirits companies listed on the Human Rights Commission Equality Index. The HRC gave the company a perfect 100 rating. Along with assisting in the QSaltLake wedding, Brown-Forman has supported many gay events around the nation including the HRC National Dinner, the White Party and various gay rodeo events. The management at Brown-Forman is committed to providing an inclusive environment for all their customers as well as their employees, according to a press release. “Our focus is on increasing our level of corporate contributions to programs and services that enhance the quality of life for ethnic minorities, LGBT, and women,” is written on their website. For more info, go to Brown-Forman.com.

First Baptist Church The First Baptist Church is extremely welcoming and accepting of people from all walks of life. The American Baptist Church, which has been in Utah since 1883, prides itself on accepting people from all different diverse backgrounds, said the church administrator, Dennis McCracken. “We just don’t make a big deal of it,” McCracken said. “We are very welcoming of everyone. Gay, lesbian or transgender, you’ll be welcome here.” The First Baptist Church hosted the QSaltLake wedding and has been hosting same-sex ceremonies for six years. The church building has been in its current location since 1951 and has two available Cchapels for weddings. The smaller, more intimate chapel, M was paid for by the Skagg family and donated Y only on the condition that everyone is allowed to be married there, McCracken said. The CM Skagg Chapel can hold about 150 people and the larger MY chapel can hold about 900. CY “The building and grounds are beautiful and perfect for any wedding,” McCracken said. CMY In addition to hosting weddings, the First K Baptist Church holds regular Sunday services, a variety of fellowship activities and other events throughout the year. Gay, lesbian and transgender people can feel very comfortable attending these events McCracken said. The church also hosts the Third Friday Bingo at with QSaltLake’s own Ruby Ridge and her Matrons of Mayhem. For more activity information or to book a chapel, go to FirstBaptist-SLC.org.

Premier Corporate Events After Janice Boes started Premier Corporate Events more than a decade ago, she noticed a hole in the Salt Lake City market. “I was planning all these weddings and events, and I could never find a venue to rent that was really urban-chic,” Boes said. “We really didn’t have a place that was like Los Angeles or New York, and I felt like as I designer, I needed that to help my own creativity.” And that’s where Pierpont Place comes in. The stylish and upscale venue that can be rented for weddings, corporate events, parties or any other occasion opened in 2006. “We really use this as an avenue for our clients,” Boes said. “Everything about the venue is customizable and we really want to help our clients find the best design and location for their events.” However, if the customer does not want to Continued on page 22 PHOTOS BY DAVID DANIELS

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The Tower at Rice-Eccles Stadium boasts an unparalleled view of Salt Lake City. Our spacious reception and meeting rooms provide ample space for nearly any event. The pleasant, yet understated decor, was specifically designed to compliment whatever atmosphere you choose. Each of our reception rooms features a west-facing wall of windows that provides for a break taking view of the city and awe-inspiring sunsets a beautiful backdrop for your reception, seminar, banquet, meeting or party. With its open space and stunning sight lines, the Olympic Cauldron Park at the south end of the stadium is an impressive and unique alternative to the tower. The 2002 Visitor Center’s intimate setting, along with the ability to expand outside into the park, provides a location like no other in the valley.

The Tower at Rice-Eccles Stadium 451 South 1400 East, Suite 600 Salt Lake City, Utah 84112-0320 Phone: (801) 581-5445

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Gay WEDDINGISSUE

Continued from page 20

hold the event at Pierpont Place, the Premier Corporate Events offers catering, planning and bar services. “We not only help our clients Janice Boes, Premier Corporate Events find other venues, we will help them plan the events, bring all the necessary tables, chairs and tablecloths and provide all the food and drink services necessary,” Boes said. Premier Corporate Events provided the liquor service for the wedding. “We really want to provide a location and a service that caters to a diverse and eclectic crowd,” Boes said. For more information, visit premiercorporateevents.com.

From humble beginnings more than 20 years ago in a hotel-lobby jewelry shop to being one of Utah’s premier jewelers, Charley Hafen Jewelers established a legacy of fantastic customer service, competitive prices and phenomenal pieces. “All the pieces in the store are designed and made in the store,” said Charley Hafen, owner and operator. “We’ve never bought a line of jewelry from another designer.” With an enormous inventory of everything from diamond necklaces and earrings to antique 7th century beads, the store is quite literally a work of art. And aside from the collection of pieces already in the store, Hafen will help design a piece to fit a customer’s taste. “Some customers come in with small ideas of what they want, and some come in with the entire piece in mind,” Hafen said. And whether it’s building a customer piece or simply expanding his line, Hafen said he has a unique style of jewelry. The line is not quite artdeco, but it is inspired by art-deco. “It’s really difficult to place a time period on my design, which is what helps make the pieces timeless,” Hafen said. “I like to mix eras in jewelry design to help keep the pieces from getting outdated. Many would describe my designs as

First Baptist Church Not that kind of Baptist church

future-deco.” Hafen participates in the community frequently. He donated rings to the happy couple. He also loves to help emerging artists in Utah. He participates in the gallery stroll and hosts different pieces of art from Utah artists every month. And he does not collect any commission or fees on any art that is bought from his store. “I really feel it is important to help emerging and young artists,” Hafen said. “I like to help them build a resume and a portfolio.” For more info go to charleyhafen.com.

Twigs Flower Company For more than 20 years, Raymond King has been creating outstanding floral arrangements for every occasion imaginable. He started Twigs Flower Company and has focused on delivering only the highest-quality products to his customers. “I think what sets us apart from others is our attention to detail,” King said. “When it comes to a wedding, or any other event, each petal has to be in pristine condition. I don’t let a flower out of my shop unless it is in perfect condition.”

PHOTO: DAVID DANIELS

It took a village

Charley Hafen Jewelers

Sax-Romney Floral Design From the everyday flower occasions, to weddings and corporate events, Sax-Romney Floral Design is a full-service company that can tailor orders to the needs of each customer. The mission statement is to deliver an excellent customer experience, and help the client deliver a beautiful and unique flower arrangement, said Edward Kubicek, owner and operator. “We are just different than your average and everyday floral design company,” Kubicek said. “Our style is unique and eclectic. From standard and tasteful designs to very forward and unique designs, we match our flowers to the customer’s taste and needs.” Sax-Romney opened more than a decade ago and has been providing flowers for every occasion including holidays, birthdays, weddings and anniversaries, Kubicek said. “We are very detail-oriented and focused on delivering only the best and highest quality products,” he said. The employees pride themselves in taking a different approach to design, said Kubicek’s business partner, Holly Johnson. “We have vision and courage in our designs, we really think outside of the box,” Johnson said. “We also have a true passion for equality in Utah and we are very inclusive and support the diversity of all our clients.” For additional information, go to saxromney.com.

We are Baptists who worship an inclusive Christ — one who invites all people, regardless of color, gender, sexual orientation or station in life, to be on their journey of faith, exploring what it means to follow Christ together. We deliberately work to make room for many different perspectives and life experiences; young and old, different cultures, different faith experiences all coming together and sharing the richness of our faith with one another. 777 South 1300 East • rstbaptist-slc.org • 801-582-4921 • Sundays at 11am

While delivering some of the most beautiful flower arrangements available in Utah, King said he focuses on providing locally grown and organic flowers. On the occasion that he needs to order flowers from out of the country, he will only purchase fair-trade flowers. “We’ve been in business in Utah for more than 20 years and in that time we’ve won numerous awards,” King said. “There’s a reason for that.” Also, this event certainly wasn’t his first samesex commitment ceremony; King said he has provided flowers for more than 30 gay ceremonies. Along with weddings and other events, Twigs Flower Company has a large selection of holiday, birthday and other flower arrangements available for purchase. For more information and pricing, go to TwigsFlowerCo.net.

Specialty Linens With more than 50,000 pieces of linen available in 60 different colors, Specialty Linens has one of Utah’s largest selections available for rental. From weddings to small family gatherings, Specialty Linens has all the different colors and sizes necessary. “We really try to match the needs of the customers with our large supply of linens,” said Bruce Bevan, owner and manager. “While we don’t have a limitless supply, we usually find a way to help out with last-minute orders.” To browse all the different sizes, styles and availability, go to SpecialtyLinens.us. And while it is advisable to reserve the tablecloths and seat covers a few months in advance, even last-minute orders are accepted.

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PHOTOS BY DAVID DANIELS


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M a r c h 1 7, 2 0 1 1   |   i s s u e 1 7 6   |   Q S a l t L a k e   |   2 3


Wedding was a full-fledged event Having their wedding be an event, a celebration and something everyone would talk about after the ceremony were very important to the QSaltLake wedding winners, Manuel Niszsien and Kamrin Carver. “We wanted the event to be a huge event,” Carver said. “We wanted it to be something everyone would dress up to attend. We’ve always wanted it to be this way.” Dreaming about having a concert at a wedding is much easier than putting together full choirs, individual performers, collecting sheet music and having everything go off without a hitch. Which is another reason why this wedding was so spectacular, Carver said. The individual performers all donated their time and services to the wedding, and the outcome was phenomenal. The funding to purchase the sheet music was provided by Home Health and Hospice.

orchestras for more than a decade. After graduating from Ashland University and performing with its symphony he moved to Utah to pursue a technology career. However, since arriving in Utah he has performed with, and helped, direct a variety of groups including the Davis County Symphony and the Ogden Concert Band. www,facebook.com/shaundavis

Photography by Laurie

Gay WEDDINGISSUE

Gary Stoddard

McCall Erickson McCall Erickson has been touring the country blowing away her audiences with her sultry voice and introspective lyrics for the past five years. She performs at clubs, weddings and at other events. She is also a well-recognized song writer and will lend direct her muse to whatever occasion a customer needs. She will not only perform her music, but she can write music and lyrics for any occasion; weddings, love, loss or just because. She helped Kamrin write a touching musical number for Manuel. www.mccallerickson.com

Most artists would feel content mastering one medium. But Gary Stoddard has been passionate about all different types of artful expression. He has studied visual arts, music and the theater since a young age. He is in a band called Slickrock Gypsies. His paintings can be seen at galleries throughout the Intermountain West, and he created four murals for the Marriott hotel chain. He also recently directed a musical called Whatever You Imagine, which was performed at the Rose Wagner Center in Salt Lake City. www.garystoddard.com

much as the passion and feeling that she puts into her music. She is available for weddings, back-up and lead vocals, and she is also a professional life coach.

Terrell Wickham

Reception Performance

All of Terrell Wickham’s performances have a common theme. All of her life and music reflect the love for life and others that she feels. The venue of performance does not matter to her as

The wedding reception was bumping with the great mixes from DJ Pauly and performances from Belly Dancing by Thia. But one of the highlights was the performance of “Single Ladies”

by Loleni Nu’usila (with Premier Productions), Craig Clifford and Torrence Wimbish. Premier Productions has been helping train young Utahns in dance and vocals since 2004. The team at Premier Productions prides itself on sharing high-quality singing and dance performances. The costumes were generously provided by Spark. The cutting edge clothing outlet focuses on European fashion and has one of the largest collections of designer underwear in the state.

‘Making it Legal’ is the essential guide book for every gay couple

Cremme

By Seth Bracken

The quintet Cremme has been performing professionally for five years. After meeting in the West Valley Symphony, the group has been recognized as one of the musical groups of its kind in the state. They have been featured performers for a variety of concerts and events including the state legislature dinner and at weddings around Utah. The group took its name from the first letter of all the performers’ names: the Carter Van Noy, Ryan Larsen, Eric Kartchner, Mike Fugal and Mike Vreeland Ensemble. cremmemusicstudios.com

Shaun Davis

David Daniels

Shaun Davis has been performing both the trumpet and French horn with symphonies and

With civil unions, domestic partnerships and mutual commitment registries, the options for gay relationships are extremely complex. Even in states where gay marriage is not legal, there are differing laws and regulations for gay relationship recognition that can vary by county and city. Salt Lake City, for example, has a mutual commitment registry that is similar to domestic partnerships. Civil unions are now legal in seven states and gay marriages are legal in five states and in Washington, D.C. However, there are three other states that recognize, and grant rights to, marriages performed in other states. With such a diverse set of laws, each relationship can bring a different set of requirements and legal differences, which is why the latest book, Making it Legal: A Guide to Same-Sex Marriage, Domestic Partnerships & Civil Unions, is an essential guide for all gay couples. Whether you are currently in a relationship or hope to be involved in one someday, this book is an essential guide for gay men and women. “This book is perfect for anyone who is looking to be involved in a relationship,” said Frederick Hertz, the author of the book. “The book helps to not only map out the entire relationship, from partner selec-

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tion to the wedding ceremony.” Hertz is also the author of the definitive legal guide for all gay relationships called, A Legal Guide for Lesbian & Gay Couples. He said many gay people have a different perspective on long-term relationships than many straight people. “When you sit around with a bunch of straight women talking about their dates, you often hear them say things like, ‘He’s just not marriage material.’ I don’t think you hear that very often with the gay community,” Hertz said. One of the main purposes of the book is to help gay people realize that marriage is not just a way to gain benefits from a partner’s employment, it’s a responsibility, Hertz said. “Marriage eventually will reach all 50 states, even Utah,” Hertz said. “Now is the time to start thinking about a relationship and working toward that goal. Marriage isn’t going to be a political statement. It will be a right. And one that should be taken very seriously. The book can be read from cover-tocover, or it can be used as a specific guide, just following the table of contents. It is extremely simple to look for a specific guide on your state or area.

The book is a comprehensive history of gay marriage and relationships in America and it outlines each battle through the state legislature and the courts. While working through the history, different state’s positions on same-sex marriage are outlined. As changes are made to the laws around the country, the book’s website is updated to reflect those changes. Also, a new edition is released every two years. The latest edition was released in January 2011. The book will help answer some of the most difficult questions for gay couples. Some of the most useful questions answered include the following: •  What’s the difference between a civil union and a domestic partnership? •  What are my state’s specific rules? •  Will my marriage be recognized in another state? •  How do I file for a divorce? •  How do I file my federal taxes? •  If I am married, will I still need a will or a living trust? •  How do kids change anything in my marriage? “Making It Legal: A Guide to Same-Sex Marriage, Domestic Partnerships & Civil Unions” is available through nolo.org.

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restaurant review An evening at Sea Salt

vinaigrette. And then came a wood-fire pizza topped with grilled winter squash. We drank the Prosecco throughout. The next two courses were just fantastic: cheesy risotto croquettes and then a platter of seafood and pasta with mussels, clams and crab. The pasta was mixed in with the seafood and all the juices plus white wine, garlic and tomatoes. The broth was fragrant and delicious, served up on a huge, rustic platter. I loved it. These plates were served with Alois Lageder Pinot Grigio. By Chef Drew Ellsworth Pork shoulder came next. Nicely roasted with wonderful thing about being a herbs and a lot of black peppercorns. The flavor culinary writer is that from time to time was delicious and then Eric appeared from the you get invited to a truly wonderful and kitchen with a large pot, scooping up braised fun event. I had such an opportunity fennel, browned then simmered in stock. It was last Wednesday night at the new Sea Salt (1725 a creamy and savory addition to the pork. E. 1300 South). Let me tell you about it. Two very nice side dishes were served with The owner of Sea Salt, Eric de Bonis, invited the pork: a plate of simple but delicious white some great wine people to Utah and took the cannellini beans, and a dish of zucchini in opportunity to prepare a full-on, rustic, Italian tomato sauce topped with feta cheese and dinner paired with both Italian wines and herbs. Both were perfectly prepared and added California Zinfandels brought in by Will Bucklin of Bucklin Wines. Francis Fecteau, Utah’s hustle- so much to the savory pork. The pork entrée was bustle wine broker was on hand too to help out. I paired with two red wines, an Italian Carmenere knew the minute I was invited that this would be and a Bucklin Juvenile Zinfandel called Bambino. I liked the dry, yet fruity Carmenere. But the most something very special. fun wine of the night was the Bambino, which Sea Salt, if you haven’t been, is the most after a few minutes in the glass opened up into a beautiful space I’ve seen in a new restaurant in floral beauty, full of violets and lavender. quite some time. The décor is ultra contempoThe last course, also on a large platter, was rary with a lot of white walls and accents, interroasted duckling in a sauce which I would call spersed with hardwood floors, white benches Caciatori with large pasta nooand Italian, wooden chairs. All dles. The duck was succulent and the counters open to the kitchen Sea Salt I wish I hadn’t been so full by the are white marble and there’s tall seasaltslc.com time it came because I could only and open ceilings. I thought I was 1725 E 1300 S eat a bite. This dish was made in in Del Mar or on Rodeo Drive in M–F 11 am–2:30 pm a yummy sauce with tomatoes, California — gorgeous. M–Th 5–9:30 pm F–Sa 5–10 pm mushrooms, parsley and topped While waiting to be seated, we CHEF DREW’S SCORE: with excellent cheeses. These were served small flutes of Adami 91 Prosecco, a fruity sparkling wine dishes were accompanied by a from Italy. The state carries three Tenuta Garbi Ripassa Valpolicella different Adamis so you need to and a Bucklin Old Hill Zinfandel. go to your favorite wine store and check them All the wines were nicely chosen and truly a treat out. I loved the bubbly which had just a touch of for me because it was the first time I had tried sweetness in the finish. many of them. When we sat down, the first course appeared: At the end, we were served a tiny wedge of lightly wilted, long, radicchio leaves topped homemade torte, a rich cake baked over pears with mild white anchovy and a lemon and chive and topped with whipped cream laced with

A

134 W Pierpont Ave, SLC – 801.519.8515 – christophersutah.com

QSaltLake Tweets @QSaltLake 2 6   |   Q S a l t L a k e   |   i s s u e 1 7 6   |   M a r c h 1 7, 2 0 1 1

Frida B Sophis cuisine 545 W. 801-98

Loco L Serious since 19 Junction 1612 U 435-64


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orange blossom water. A very nice ending to the night. To be fair, I have to say that I wasn’t crazy about the pizza and had it been me, I’d have made the duck in a different treatment, although it was delicious. I thought it was too much like the seafood dish and also, my least favorite wine of the night was the Pinot Grigio which I thought was too flavorless to hold up to all the hearty flavors in the food.

The risotto balls were to die for and the pork was my favorite. All the dishes, in fact the entire evening, was like being in Italy in someone’s home. Home-cooking all the way and good home cooking to boot! I know Sea Salt is still new and working out some kinks, but my experiences there have been fun and I love the atmosphere. I rate my evening at Sea Salt 91 points.

dining guide

Off Trax Café Coffee, wi-fi and pool 259 W 900 South 801‑364‑4307

Frida Bistro Sophisticated Mexican cuisine, wine and spirits 545 W. 700 South 801-983-6692

Omar’s Rawtopia Restaurant Organic live food 2148 S. Highland Dr. 801‑486‑0332

Loco Lizard Cantina Serious mexican food since 1999 at Kimball Junction. 1612 Ute Blvd., Park City 435-645-7000

Sage’s Cafe The freshest and healthiest cuisine possible 473 E 300 South 801‑322‑3790

Tin Angel Cafe Local food, music, art. Serving lunch, dinner and Saturday brunch 365 W 400 South 801‑328-4155 Trolley Wing Company We’re Back! Open daily noon to 11pm 550 S 700 East 801-538-0745 Vertical Diner Vegetarian restaurant open seven days a week 10 a.m.–9 p.m. 2280 S West Temple 801‑484‑8378

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ARTS&Entertainment

gay agenda

Pla out

Gaga for shoes and horses

By Tony Ho

A

by Tony Hobday

If you were to go into my closet — let me tell you it’s worth it — you would find the following shoes for men: lizard-skin and rabbit-hair cowboy boots and a pair of Sperry Top-Siders. For women: rabbit-hair cowboy boots, four pairs of turquoise (the color really brings out my eyes) leather Wedges, nine pairs of lace-up boots of varying heights, 17 pairs of stilettos, five pairs of sandals with little plastic flowers, a pair of Birkenstocks (for when I’m feeling butch) and one pair of flats (unfortunately they make my ankles look puffy). So see, when you come out of my closet, you feel super gay and fabulous.

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martial art of Capoeira, innovative contemporary dance and fire dance.

2pm, Club Try-Angles, 251 W. 900 South. Free, 801-364-3203 or clubtry-angles.com.

QQ The closing weekend of the Royal Court of the Golden Spike Empire’s AIDS Awareness Week includes: Red Party, tonight at Püre; Coffee Glutch Poker Run & Chili, Saturday at The Trapp; and Live for Life Show, Sunday at St. Paul’s Episcopal Church. This annual weeklong fundraising event supports the HIV/AIDS community in Utah.

thursday — In celebration of St. Pat-

rick’s Day, I’d like to borrow a quote from an Irish man, such as myself. “I am a drinker with a writing problem.” – Brendan Behan. Fitting, don’t you think? Anyhoo, celebrate this day of green and clovers with friends over corned beef and cabbage at Club Try Angles. Gene Naté will be wearing a kilt just as nature (literally) intended. Aaaagh!

QQ Shut up! ... These shoes are three-hundred fucking dollars. Yes, I’m stealing lyrics from Kelly’s “Shoes,” but I can Betch! Anyhoo, if you love shoes as much as I do then you don’t want to miss the shoe-inspired art exhibit The Perfect Fit: Shoes Tell Stories. There’s a pair of ceramic shoes with a painted monkey called “Let’s Stay Together;” a pair of fabulous boots made from scratch tickets, dental floss, canvas, cardboard and velvet (all things you can find under my mattress); and a pair of platform shoes made from painted wood, plastic and papier maché; plus much more. To die for! Hours vary, through April 3, Kimball Art Center, 638 Park Ave., Park City. Free, 435-649-8882 or kimballartcenter.org.

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friday — The story of Anne Frank is one

of the most moving and timeless pieces in world history. She’s a renowned victim of the Holocaust, specifically because of the diary she had kept from the age of 13 to her death at the age of 15. Her story was published, called The Diary of Anne Frank, a movie was made in the 1950s and stage productions have enthralled, angered, saddened and maybe inspired audiences for years. 7:30pm, through April 2, Pioneer Theatre, 300 S. 1400 East, UofU. Tickets $24–42, 801-581-6961 or pioneertheatre.org.

QQ Nationally touring music and dance company Samba Fogo is proud to present Fogo Na Cabeça (Fire In The Head) ... oooh! been there, it buurrrns! Oh sorry ... anyhoo, this live music and dance concert will feature Brazilian and Afro-Brazilian music and dance, the Afro-Brazilian 2 8   |   Q S a l t L a k e   |   i s s u e 1 7 6   |   M a r c h 1 7, 2 0 1 1

7:30pm, through Saturday, Jeanne Wagner Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. Broadway. Tickets $15–20, 801-355-ARTS or arttix.org.

9:30pm tonight, 11am Saturday & 6pm Sunday. For more information visit rcgse.org.

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saturday — She’s finally here! Lady

Gaga is in the house, donned in a fishing-lure wetsuit and a catfish tied to her head. That’s freakin’ stinky! No ... wait, donned in a wicker-basket skirt, a cantaloupe bra and fruit bowl hat ... chachacha! Oh lord, my friends will be there in fringed lampshades, fishnet stockings and heels — going as the leg lamp on A Christmas Story. That’s freakin’ brilliant!

8pm, Energy Solutions Arena, 301 W. South Temple. Tickets $49.50– 175, 801-467-8499 or smithstix.com.

QQ The sprite women of sWerve have kissed the Blarney Stone so many times they could flatter the muumuu right off Gayle Ruzicka. So I can only imagine what kind of trouble they’ll get into at their post-St. Patty’s Day Party. There will be dancing, drinking and a wee bit ‘o snacking. Bronwen Beecher performs. 7–11pm, Lucky 13, 135 W. 1300 South. Tickets $13/at the door, swerveutah.com.

QQ Lesbian performer JD Samson (Le Tigre), Michael O’Neill and Ginger Brooks Takahashi comprise MEN, a Brooklyn-based band and art/performance collective that focuses on the energy of live performance and radical potential of dance music. MEN speaks to issues such as wartime economies, sexual compromise, and demand-

cc S o M in the LDS Members: faithful to comfortab eringly sup Eric Sam the head o Brigham Y “Borderlan which is “ ture — ste are, telling Produce Equus directed b See March 24 characters Dave, a do interested ing liberties through lyrical content and an exciting stage gay nephe Topher show. 9pm, Urban Lounge, 241 S. 500 East. Tickets $10, 801-746-0557 or says of the 24tix.com. gay-Morm Tuesday — Just like I am, Bon Jovi is ways, a no teenager. slippery when wet, and in that good way! But I don’t “give love a bad name,” although, parents ar like when I had Fire In The Head, I’ve been in a “blaze of resents th glory.” On that note, the veteran rock band hits the Utah outspoken stage tonight, and frontman Jon Bon Jovi will be singing me “a love song.” Ryan Star opens.

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7:30pm, Energy Solutions Arena, 301 W. South Temple. Tickets $16.50–500, 801-467-8499 or smithstix.com.

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thursday — Westminster is pleased to present a production of Equus. Peter Shaffer’s drama is well-known for its hard-hitting and controversial examination of religion and sexuality. The play explores the case of Alan Strang, a 17-year-old boy ritually obsessed with horses, and his interaction with his psychiatrist, Martin Dysart, who is struggling with his own purpose and meaning. FYI ... it does not star Daniel Radcliffe. 7:30pm, Courage Theatre, Westminster College, 1840 S. 1300 East. Tickets $10, 801-832-2457.

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friday — The Utah Symphony presents Mozart Symphony No. 40. Swiss conductor Matthias Bamert will delight you with a trio of Mozart masterpieces in one evening including The Magic Flute Overture, Clarinet Concerto, and G Minor Symphony. 8pm, through Saturday, Abravanel Hall, 123 W. South Temple. Tickets $25–85, 801-355-ARTS or arttix.org.

UPCOMING EVENTS APR 16 APR 20 JUL 16 JUL 25 AUG 13

Lily Tomlin, Kingsbury Hall David Sedaris, Kingsbury Hall Lisa Lampanelli, Wendover Katy Perry, ESA Josh Grobin, ESA

sav da

March sWerve Party swerveu

April 1 Day of S dayofsil

April 1 Queer P utahprid

April 2 Rocky M Compet rockymo com

April 2 PWACU pwacu.o

May 14 Gay Day tinyurl.c


Plan-B Theatre Co. coming out as a Borderlander? By Tony Hobday

A

ccording to a 2006 article in Sunstone Magazine — a publication offering open and frank discussion on Mormonism — there are four “groups in the LDS orbit,” one of which is Borderlands Members: those who consider themselves faithful to and part of the Church but don’t fit comfortably in Group 1 (true believers, unwaveringly supportive, the acceptable.). Eric Samuelsen, local playwright and the head of the playwriting program at Brigham Young University, explores fictional “Borderlanders” in the play Borderlands, which is “about ‘coming out’ in Mormon culture — stepping forward, admitting who you are, telling the uncomfortable.” Produced by Plan-B Theatre Company and Equus directed by Jerry Rapier, the show relates four arch 24 characters: Phyllis, owner of a used car lot; Dave, a down-and-out car salesman; Gail, an interested consumer; and Brian, who is Gail’s ng stage gay nephew and the lot’s mechanic. Topher Rasmussen, who portrays Brian, -0557 or says of the character: “Brian is a 17-year-old gay-Mormon car mechanic. He is, in many ways, a normal (if maybe a little bratty) ovi is teenager. He’s been sent to Utah because his way! though, parents are worried that he’s gay. Part of him laze of resents this, so he can be a bit ornery, and he Utah outspoken. Though he is a smart ass, he is inging

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save the date March 19 sWerve’s St. Patty’s Day Party swerveutah.com April 15 Day of Silence dayofsilence.org

spiritually mature, and has a strong relationship with God. The fact that there is no place for him in the Mormon Church is very sad, but he accepts it and does what he can.” Borderlands opens March 31 at the Rose Wagner Center, and runs through April 10. Playwright Samuelsen shares the inspiration for this exploration; his obsession, perhaps, with used cars; and of whom he is an unfortunate fan. Describe the inspiration(s) for your writing of Borderlands. My initial inspiration came from reading the Borderlands column in Sunstone Magazine. I think they’ve got an archive of old Borderlands columns on their website. Anyway, I found the stories in that column immensely inspiring and interesting, and I was taken with the idea of exploring that territory, the interstitial spaces in our culture. I don’t really see myself as a Borderlander myself, but I have a number of friends who are, and I thought the whole thing was fascinating. As the setting is a car lot, what is the significance of the title? I love used car lots. I love the process of buying a car. It’s the one space in American commercial life that’s contingent. You buy a gallon of milk at Albertson’s, you pay what they charge. But in a car lot, the listed price is merely the starting point for a

May 26–27 Hey Look Us Over, Salt Lake Men’s Choir, saltlakemenschoir.org June 3–5 Utah Pride Festival utahpridecenter.org June 11 HRC Gala Dinner hrc.org

August 4–7 Park City Arts Festival kimballartcenter.org August 7 QSaltLake Day at Lagoon qsaltlake.com August 12–14 Utah Rebellion utahrebellion.com

June 17–19 Damn These Heels! Film Festival damntheseheels.org

August 14 QSaltLake Day at Park Silly Mkt parksillysundaymarket.com

June 23–26 Utah Arts Festival uaf.org

August 20 Equality Utah Allies Dinner equalityutah.org

April 24 PWACU’s Spring Fling pwacu.org

July 30 QSaltLake and Pride Softball Day at the Bees prideleague.com

December 1 World AIDS Day

May 14 Gay Day at Hogle Zoo tinyurl.com/gayhogle

August PWACU River Trip pwacu.org

To get your major event

April 16 Queer Prom utahpridecenter.org April 22–23 Rocky Mtn Olympus Leather Competition rockymountainolympus. com

worldaidsday.org

included on this list, e-mail arts@qsaltlake.com

negotiation. I love that. It’s a play about liminality, about contingency in general. And so I thought a car lot was the perfect setting for it. I also loved the irony of sitting in an ‘honesty car’ in a used car lot. Car salesmen have a popular reputation for dishonesty, though I have to say, I think that’s a bad rap. It’s the one handshake business I know. Is your message universal, as in for those who are non-Mormon — will they get it, appreciate it? I hope so. I think most people want to present themselves to the world in certain flattering ways, and that there comes a point where we have to ruefully admit that we’re not, perhaps, quite what we present ourselves as being. I think we come out all the time, in all sorts of ways. Just the other day, I had to quaveringly admit to my son that I am (gulp) sort of a fan of Sarah Palin. Not, I hasten to add, that I think she’d make a good president or anything. But I think she has an authenticity most politicians lack. But in our family, admitting to an admiration for a tea party candidate is . . . akin to apostasy. As head of the playwriting program at BYU, what has been the biggest hurdle, and

what has been your greatest accomplishment? Far and away the biggest challenge we face at BYU — and it’s a challenge we share with the University of Utah and Utah State and Utah Valley University -- is geographic isolation. Live theater has to be seen where it happens, when it happens, and we live in Utah — it’s hard to see the best off-West End ground-breaking new plays. That’s why our study abroad programs are so central and important. I think my biggest accomplishment has been the wonderful young writers we’ve produced, who are in MFA programs and who are working professionally. Teaching is about working with great young students, and we’re just starting to see the fruits of our program, with wonderful young writers like Mattie Rydalch, Matthew Greene, Robert Gibbs, Elizabeth Leavitt — I could go on and on. Q Borderlands was first read publicly at the 2009 Affirmation National Conference in Salt Lake City, and Plan-B is honored that the preview performance on Wednesday, March 30 at 7 p.m. is a fundraiser for the Salt Lake Chapter of Affirmation: Gay & Lesbian Mormons. For tickets call 801355-ARTS or visit arttix.org.

M a r c h 1 7, 2 0 1 1   |   i s s u e 1 7 6   |   Q S a l t L a k e   |   2 9


ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

Oh Boy!

age it, so e gay they ju hope it go

You’re a li go away.  lucky. I’ve ’80s pop icon on getting clean,My dad is having a kid and why he’s an ‘alien’when I cam reaction. I By Chris Azzopardi and my da surprising lot has been written about Boy George in the but they ca last 10 years, but not much of it’s pointed to what made the icon a pop phenomenon. Drugs, jail and an escortYou were p run-in are what kept the not-so-boyish star in the head-with style lines, completely overshadowing his influence on music. That’sthink new changing, however, with his first album in a decade, Ordinaryfor social who brigh Alien, and an upcoming Culture Club reunion in 2012. difficult fo But the 49-year-old doesn’t ignore his past, and in our interview he chatted about having an “underlying desire to be she’s a wo sane,” how the LGBT community is to blame for its image and don’t know wonderful why he won’t be the next gay celebrity to adopt a baby. and that’s How are you, Boy George?  Lovely, thank you. about diffe Does the title Ordinary Alien have anything to do with being think, “Oh gay  Maybe. It’s based on the fact that there’s so much written like Gaga a about me that’s either untrue, partly untrue or not quite true. applauded always the (Laughs) In a way, what I’m saying is I know that I’m odd — and yet there’s a part of me that’s kind of quite ordinary. It’s Both Gaga important to have both. When it comes to practical things in life,one of the being a bit ordinary is very useful. you look u

A

ficult ques because a tive and op Gay men everywhere are taking note right now. Are aliens people. Th popular in the gay community?  (Laughs) what I wan How does it feel knowing you paved the way for other queer been distr performers?  Everything is part of a kind of “daisy chain.” When now that I I was growing up, there were a lot of characters on TV who were of be inspi obviously gay and camp and playing with the boundaries, and I to myself n think all of those people shaped who I am. So, I think everythingprobably a comes from somewhere. When wou Even though David Bowie wasn’t necessarily gay, I think that self?  (Lau he had a huge influence on me as a kid. When you’re a kid you document don’t really have many reference points. There are more now, out. But on but not back then in the ’70s when I came out to my family. I have said was 15, so the process of coming out to the people that I love quite joyfu started a long time before it became something I had to do and I think publicly, and people still have very wrong ideas of what it is to always had be a gay man or a gay woman. I’ve been t Otherwise, you’re an alien?  I’m definitely the alien. But I’m the kind of alien you can bring home to meet your mother.

How so?  People just think of you as a sexual being; they don’t realize that you have pets and bills and jobs and families. They just don’t understand that. And I think we as gay people don’t really do much to help ourselves in that department. If you look at any gay magazine, it’s all nipple rings and butts. So I think people don’t understand; they just look at everything you do as a kind of sexual thing and they don’t see beyond that, and that’s a shame.

my life, bu desire to b winning ou

How do yo drug addic person, it’ in the way municate. when I was

Why do you think we’re looked at as sexual deviants?  For a lot of us, the first time we have any sense of who we are is What are s when we have sex with another man or another woman. That’s tions?  I e when we’re defined, and so it’s no wonder that there’s a kind of exercise a strong physical element tied to gay culture. which is re It’s sad in a way, because even if you’re a straight kid and you positive at don’t have demonstrative parents and you don’t have a good relief, reall family life, at least you have lots of social references. So you very powe have an idea of how things work. But when you’re gay, who tells faith in hu you? There’s this attitude that if you talk about it you encour-

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y!

age it, so even if a parent knows their kid is gay they just don’t really talk about it; they just hope it goes away, and of course it rarely does.

You’re a living example that it doesn’t just go away.  Absolutely! But you know, I’m very lucky. I’ve always had the support of my family. clean,My dad is dead now, but my dad was amazing ‘alien’when I came out. I was really surprised by his reaction. I thought I was going to be killed, and my dad was great. So families can be so surprising, and people can be equally ignorant rge in the but they can be also amazing. what made d an escortYou were pushing all sorts of boundaries the head-with style and gender in the ’80s. Do you sic. That’sthink newer artists are pushing far enough , Ordinaryfor social change with their art?  Anybody who brightens the horizon has my support. It’s . difficult for someone like Lady Gaga because our ire to be she’s a woman and she’s straight, I think. I age and don’t know her well enough, but I think it’s wonderful that she’s supportive of gay people . and that’s to be applauded. Sometimes I read about different people, like Justin Bieber, and th being think, “Oh my god.” (Laughs) So I think people h written like Gaga are a blessing and they must be te true. applauded for their support — because it’s not always the case. dd — ry. It’s Both Gaga and Adam have referenced you as ngs in life,one of their idols. If you were them, would

you look up to yourself?  That’s a very difficult question. (Laughs) I think now I would, because at this point in my life I feel very positive and optimistic and I think I want to inspire aliens people. That’s where I am right now, and that’s what I wanted to do when I started. There’s er queer been distractions along the way, but I feel right in.” When now that I have a responsibility in a way to kind who were of be inspiring and, yes, maybe I would look up ies, and I to myself now. Not always, but I think now is everythingprobably a good time. (Laughs)

But I’m her.

When wouldn’t you have looked up to yourself?  (Laughs) They’ve all been pretty welldocumented. I don’t think I need to point them out. But on my current record, a lot of people have said that the record’s really optimistic and quite joyful and has a certain kind of serenity, and I think that’s always been part of me. I’ve always had a strong sense of optimism. Yes, I’ve been terribly self-destructive at points in hey don’t my life, but there’s always been this underlying ies. They desire to be sane. At the moment I’d say that’s le don’t winning out, and that’s a good thing. f you look How do you feel now that you’ve kicked your I think drug addiction?  The difference in me as a you do person, it’s phenomenal, and that’s reflected at, and in the way people treat me and the way I com-

hink that a kid you re now, mily. I at I love to do at it is to

municate. People used to withdraw from me when I was an addict. s?  For are is What are some of your healthier addicn. That’s tions?  I eat pretty well. I’m pretty healthy. I s a kind of exercise a lot now. I’ve given up the smoking,

which is really the last vice. Things are really d and you positive at the moment, and that’s such a a good relief, really. I go to NA, and it’s had a very, So you very powerful effect on me. It’s renewed my , who tells faith in humanity, and I think having a spiritual ncour-

program is really useful. I pray every night and every morning, and even if I’m only speaking to myself, I think it’s a really healthy thing — to just have that moment in your day where you just say something positive about yourself and about the world. All these gay men — Ricky Martin, Clay Aiken, Neil Patrick Harris and now Elton John — are raising kids. Do you feel the urge to have a boy George?  I don’t personally feel the urge, but I think if it’s something you really desire then that’s fine. I think it’s totally acceptable. My mother’s generation really raised their kids on their own. My father was like a lot of men: He was never around, and he really left the child-rearing to my mother. It’s a life-changing thing, and I was really amazed, because I’m friends with Elton, and I didn’t know at all that he was doing that. (Laughs) But it’s something he’s always wanted. So you’re not interested?  I’m not maternal, no. I have two dogs, and one of them is very needy. (Laughs) It’s not something you take lightly. I know that Elton will have a lot of help, but still, it’s a big emotional investment. And I’m not one of those people who think gay people shouldn’t have kids. I also think you don’t make a child gay by raising it. My parents were straight, my brothers are all straight, we all drank the same water, ate the same food. People need to realize that’s not how it works. (Laughs) Tell me about the Culture Club reunion.  We’re going to do a big showcase in October to announce what we’re doing and hopefully around that time we’ll start recording or writing, and in 2012 we’re going to celebrate our 30th anniversary and do a huge tour and hopefully come to America ... if they’ll let me in. At the moment I’m banned, so I’m hoping. I’ve got people working on that right now. It’s really important that we play America; it’s going to be amazing. It’s been a long time since you have.  Speak to Obama for me. Have a word. I mean, he’s guesting on my album (on Yes We Can), so I’m sure he’ll be cool. (Laughs) What inspired the 30th anniversary reunion?  We did something about 13 years ago, which was quite random but it was a lot of fun at the time. But we get along better now. We’re all a bit more grown up and quite focused. And a lot of it is me. If I’m in a good space it really affects everybody around me. I have a really good relationship with the guys in the band now. I’m really good friends with Jon (Moss) now. There was a long time when everything about him used to drive me crazy, as it does with ex-partners. It’s all about growing up.

cry on my shoulder and I’m very good at telling them what they’re doing wrong, but then when you try to apply it to yourself, it’s a lot harder. I think relationships — whether they’re gay or straight — are very difficult and I hope that with age they become easier. I mean, I’m not in a relationship right now. You’re not interested in one either, are you?  No, I’m not really looking. I’ve never really been someone who needs a partner. If somebody amazing comes along and blows me away, then great, I’m open to it. But I’m not going to put up with anything. I’m not one of those people who needs to be involved; I need to be with someone that I — particularly at this stage in my life — kind of really respect and someone that’s not really overly concerned with what I do and someone who can really cope with the baggage that comes with being me, even though a lot of it is

kind of imagined. People who don’t know me read a lot of crap about me and they base their kind of idea of me on what they’ve read, and sometimes that can be a good thing — because people are always saying to me, “You’re nothing like I thought you’d be.” I don’t know what people expect, but I guess that’s one of the ills of being in the public eye and having so many contradictory things written about yourself. You’ve said you’re finally growing up, and I’m wondering if it’s enough to warrant a name change: Boy George to Man George?   (Laughs) I don’t think I’ll ever escape that moniker, and I’m not the up-my-own-assI’m-gonna-change-my-name-in-a-bid-to-betaken-seriously type. Boy George is a stage name and it suits me, and I think it’s just gonna stick. (Laughs) Let’s not complicate things by changing my name. Q

The 2011 QPages will be published in May 2011. Call to get rates

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Your relationship with Jon caused a lot of tension in the group. Speaking from experience, do you have any advice for inter-office romances?  (Laughs) Oh my god! Well, no, I don’t actually. I don’t think I’m qualified to give relationship advice to anyone. Advice is very easy to give, but it’s not so easy to put into practice. A lot of my friends come to me and M a r c h 1 7, 2 0 1 1   |   i s s u e 1 7 6   |   Q S a l t L a k e   |   3 1


FUN & GAMES

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That’s a Fact, Jack Across   1 Bride and bride’s vehicle   5 The d. of k.d. lang   9 Rock costar 14 Declare openly 15 Nastase of the net 16 Standing up straight 17 Character in 63-Across 19 Kind of blitz 20 Hit in the family jewels 21 Caesar’s final reproach 23 What an octopus shoots off 24 Actor who played 17-Across 28 Come out on the beach 31 Tear up 32 AZT, e.g. 34 Break for Heather’s mommies 35 Made less difficult to bear 39 With 41-Across, actor who played 51-Across 41 See 39-Across 43 Ventriloquist Bergen 44 Bottom line 45 Village People hit 46 Plant collections 50 Crazy like a fox 51 Character in 63-Across

55 HMO concern 56 “Like ___ not” 57 “There Is Nothing Like a Dame” fruit 61 Sacred song 63 Upcoming movie based on a Jack Kerouac book 66 Write “The Hot’l Baltimore” 67 Moliere’s mom 68 Six Feet Under character 69 Smooths 70 Where the last ferry leaves 71 Antony of Shakespeare in Love Down   1 Be deficient in   2 Russian John  3 Oliver! request   4 One of the little hooters   5 Soft in the head   6 Home state of J. Nabors   7 Bug a phone   8 At the head of the line   9 Showed reluctance 10 Stuff from your shaft 11 Took advantage of a decorator 12 Danish topper 13 Vampire vanquisher 18 Nose activator

22 Sung syllable 25 Pre-kiss insert, perhaps 26 Chose not to swallow 27 Pisa place 28 Beat barely 29 Pitt of “Inglourious Basterds” 30 Hamlet 33 Poet Judy 36 Bottom lines 37 Letter abbr. 38 Time of decision 40 Isolated individuals 41 Greek queen of heaven 42 Islamic leader 44 Cover for locks 47 “Poppycock!” 48 Hag transport 49 Where to look, in “Misty” 51 Coins featuring Eleanor’s husband 52 ___ Gay 53 Husband of a Duke 54 Fish stories 58 Guy that cruised with a pair of bears 59 Concert receipts 60 Baltic Sea tributary 62 Announcer Hall 64 “I’m a trisexual, I’ll ___ anything once” 65 Put the whammy on Puzzle answers on page 37

Q

T Club Tr ●

251 W 9 801-364

●J JAM

751 N 3 801-891

anagram An anagram is a word or phrase that can be made using the letters from another word or phrase. Rearrange the letters below to answer:

What’s the name of Lady Gaga’s current tour.

tall mens orb _______

h am ic U fantasy or something Indigo Girl puts us in call lesbia tent, or at for us, jus hobby, the lifestyle be familiariza in Utah) w involved a common o My obje on our cou applaud fe munity. I’ll hubs, cove duct an in humble co unaware o To provi tion, I was and have l couple pre a bartende school. Wh to enjoy liv variety of c colorful wi limit the c age or soc

____

PUZZLE SOLUTIONS ARE ON PAGE 36

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K KARAMBA ●

1051 E 2 801-696

V TAVER ●

201 E 30 801-519

R THE TR ●

102 S 60 801-531

B = Bear/Leather


honor roll

she culture A great year for lesbians by Annalisa Millo

T

here’s a common misconception among those I encounter when the topic of female homosexuality comes up. Usually it either conjures an unrealistic fantasy or the stereotype of an outdated norm — something similar to a flannel-clad tribe with the Indigo Girls as their leader. Obviously, neither puts us in the most flattering light. Some would call lesbian culture in Utah a paradox, non-existent, or at least not very fondly regarded. Luckily for us, just like a fine wine, good music, or any hobby, the subtleties within the alternative lifestyle become more apparent to anyone with familiarization. There are many of us (yes, even in Utah) who are more style-conscious, socially involved and culturally aware Sapphics than the common opinion dictates. My objective with this column is to elaborate on our countless sub-cultures and highlight and applaud female members of our own LGBT community. I’ll visit daily and nightly less-friendly hubs, cover current trends and events, and conduct an interview or two. This column is my own humble contribution to hopefully educate the unaware of our ever-growing and lively culture. To provide a bit of background information, I was born and raised in Salt Lake City, and have lived here my whole life except for a couple preschool years in Seattle. Currently I’m a bartender at a local martini bar while I finish school. While slinging drinks at work I’m lucky to enjoy live jazz almost every day and meet a variety of characters, who always become more colorful with the more drinks I pour. I try not to limit the company I keep by gender, orientation, age or social class. I live with my lady-friend and

a couple roommates in a loft downtown, just like so many reality shows but sans the chaos. I’ve never owned a Barbie, I appreciate the outdoors as much as the next Utahn, and enjoy dressing up (or not) and going out on the town just as much as I enjoy my unhealthy relationship with my Netflix account. In my own experience, and I can only imagine how many others have similar stories, growing up as somewhat a tomboy is a common characteristic for many of us. Of course there was the insistence by family members to wear more dresses and cover our dirty and scraped up knees. They suggested participating in scrapbooking and playing with dolls but my stubborn, not-so-dainty nature resisted. Then came maturity, not only in behavior and self-awareness, but in the improvement of a chosen style that fits ever-so with a personality to match. Now I’m not quite lipstick, not quite chapstick, neither fish nor fowl, as they say. There are certain days for high heels and makeup, and others for sneakers and a T-shirt. But I’ve been quickly learning that in the end that’s the beauty of living in today’s up-and-coming generation. New fondness for diversity has surfaced and our unique qualities are now embraced. The freedom of creativity beyond the stereotypes of the past is limitless. We are the generation of icons like Ellen, k.d. lang, Samantha Ronson, La Roux, Peaches, Kate Moennig, Daniela Sea, Leisha Hailey, those adorable Quin sisters, Tegan and Sara, and the list goes on. We are the modern generation of fashionable and savvy lesbians. As recently as a couple decades ago there was butch and there was femme. There were

those few who were out and obvious about it, and there were many more who weren’t, fearing public and familial scrutiny. Now, with further acceptance of androgyny and alternative living in mainstream culture, the facets of lifestyle differentiation are countless. Even in the past few years I’ve observed such optimism of lesbian portrayal evolve within mainstream media. I like to think that it started with the groundbreaking episode of Ellen’s character coming out in her sitcom Ellen in 1997. This unprecedented event on national television yielded the term “After Ellen,” which is now loosely expressed but fittingly applied. In 2003 was the musical performance of Madonna, who twisted the gender norms by appearing in a tuxedo. After which of course, was the immortal kiss that she shared with Britney Spears. Since then has been Katy Perry’s “I Kissed a Girl” and Marge Simpson’s sister Patty Bouvier coming out as lesbian on The Simpsons. There’s this year’s Oscars with Anne Hathaway’s gender-bending donning of a tuxedo, and the nominated Black Swan and The Kids Are Alright. This year’s awards were unmistakably ridden with lesbian undertones throughout the entire broadcast. Not to mention the champion of lesbianism in modern media, The L Word aired from 2004 to 2009. It may have been glamorized, however universally relatable in one way or another among just about every lesbian, bisexual or transgender female I know. The days of Doc Martens and flannel plaid shirts are behind us (unfortunately). No longer shall we fear scrutiny or public critique, as they are slowly but certainly an obsolete notion of the past. Women are becoming increasingly comfortable with coming out, dressing and behaving how they please, and resisting societal pressure to conventionalize their way of life now more than ever. Written into Anne Hathaway’s dialogue of this year’s Academy Awards was the statement that this really is “a great year for lesbians.” I couldn’t agree more. Q

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Q bar guide Weekly Bar Events T Club Try-Angles ●

251 W 900 S • D M N 801-364-3203 • clubtry-angles.com

SUNDAYS

MONDAYS

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SATURDAYS

Karaoke $1 DRAFTS

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Karaoke

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DART TOURNAMENT 7PM DJ D

DJ D

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BEER BUST BBQ AT 4PM BLOODY MARYS

K KARAMBA ●

LATIN GAY NIGHT DJ FRANK GO-GO DANCERS

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B = Bear/Leather | D = Dance Floor | F = Food | K = Karaoke Nights | L = Mostly Lesbian | M = Mostly Gay Men | N = Neghborhood Bar | T = 18+ Area | X = Mixed Gay/Straight Or Gay Certain Nights

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Food&DRINK

cocktail chatter Heads in the clouds: The Aviation Will Lady Gaga ‘drag’ herself to Salt Lake City bar on Saturday? performance of her own songs. Following two of her most recent concerts, the If the trend continues, Lady Gaga herself infamous diva and fashonista, Her Majesty could be showing up at a gay bar near you. So, Lady Gaga, stopped by local gay bars to give impromptu live performances. Will she continue which Utah bar would she grace with her presence? her trend in Salt Lake City on March 19? Club JAM is hosting an after-Gaga party. The Her most recent appearance, in a Dallas gay Complex will have a performance by Gaga’s club called the Round-Up Saloon, the Mother DJ, Lady Starlight. Club Try-Angles is hosting Monster hopped on stage and gave a fantastic Manhunt underwear night and The Trapp is only rendering of her most recent single, Born this Way, complete with backup dancers. The perfor- a block away. And of course, Club Metro will be bouncing on Saturday night with all the little mance was unannounced and unplanned. monsters coming from the show. Before her Dallas performance, she surprised Which club do you think Gaga will visit this the performers at a local drag show by climbSaturday? ing on stage and joining the drag queens in the Each Sudoku puzzle has a unique solution which can be reached logically without guessing. Enter digits 1 through 9 into the Each Sudoku puzzle has a unique solution whichone can of beeach reached logically blank spaces. Every row must contain digit, as must without guessing. Enter digits 1 3x3 through 9 intoQdoku the blank spaces. Every row each column and each square. is actually five Level: Medium must contain one of each digit, as must each column and each 3x3 square. puzzles. Qdokuseparate, is actuallybut five connected, separate, butSudoku connected, Sudoku puzzles. Level: Easy

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Cryptogram

9

5 4

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Anagram

By Ed Sikov

‘S

o, mutatis mutandis, the LGBT community ...” Ted was lecturing about marriage equality from his podium on our living room couch. “What?” I blurted. Cocktail “hour” was pushing 90 minutes. I should have served the lamb stew and couscous already, but I couldn’t get out of the chair. “The gay community must shift its praxis from the dystopic to the ...” “No, before that. You said ‘mucous mucandies.’ What the hell does that mean?” “You have a Ph.D. and you don’t know what mutatis mutandis means?” He was appalled. “Fuck you,” I explained. We’ve been doing this for years. We’re all academics or ex-academics. Dan has three degrees: B.A., MBA, and Ph.D. — all from Harvard. I have a Ph.D. from Columbia; Ted has one from Princeton and teaches at NYU; his partner, Eric, has an M.F.A. from Columbia and taught at Wellesley but now writes screenplays that actually are made into movies. You may have caught the farcical Brainiacs on cable; Eric wrote it. This dinner party demonstrated where he got his material. We were flying on Aviations. I was in avast liquor emporium on the Upper East Side last week — I rarely go up there, since I’m deathly allergic to cashmere sweaters and simple strands of pearls — and saw Creme de Violette on the shelf with a little printed recipe for the Aviation. Maraschino, was nearby. I bought both. By Maraschino, I don’t mean the syrup in which innocent cherries are drowned in artificially flavored, carcinogenically colored sugar water so children can have their first drug rushes. I mean the clear cherry liqueur, which Italians make from Marasca cherries and their crushed pits. Et la Creme de Violette? Yes, it’s really made

Cryptogram

from violets and thus wins the title of The Gayest Liqueur Ever, there being no Creme de Pansy. I played around with the recipes I found online at the marvelous blog www.sippetysup.com, where I learned that the drink has the reputation of being a 1930’s cocktail, but it actually dates from 1916, when only a few people ever saw an airplane, let alone flew in one. In those days, flying into the sky in a technological wonder seemed miraculous. The Aviation celebrates that magic. It has by far the loveliest color of any cocktail I’ve ever seen: watercolor-pale lavender. And it’s extraordinarily luscious. Now that air travel is like taking the bus, except that the bus is on time, the aeroplane’s early thrill is long gone. Unless, of course, you make yourself and your smarty-pants friends Aviations, in which case you’ll all quickly be even higher than your IQs.

The Aviation (a variation on the classic) Note: Martini glasses are much larger now than they were in the early 20th century. This recipe fills one 2011 glass or two old-style glasses. Half-cup of Beefeater gin 1 tablespoon lemon juice 1 tablespoon Maraschino 1½ teaspoon Creme de Violette Half-teaspoon “really” simple syrup – mix equal parts sugar and water in a jar and shake until the sugar dissolves Chill the martini glass(es). Put all ingredients into a cocktail shaker and chill in the freezer for five or 10 minutes. Take glass(es) and shaker out, add a few ice cubes to the shaker, and shake as though your life depended on it. Strain into the frosty glass(es) and hope that a few shards of ice rise to the top. Q

A cryptogram is a puzzle where one letter in the puzzle is substituted with another. For example: ECOLVGNCYXW YCR EQYIIRZNBZN YZU PSZ! Has the solution: CRYPTOGRAMS ARE CHALLENGING AND FUN! In the above example Es are all replaced by Cs. The puzzle is solved by recognizing letter patterns in words and

successively substituting letters until the solution is reached.

This week’s hint: H = R, Theme: Quote by Colorado Sen. Pat Steadman on the state’s possible civil-union bill.

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español exprés First date rollercoaster By Gus Herrero

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etting the first date is a big step in assuring an interesting and exciting night. As many of us know, the first date is about a first impression. The other person will notice things that go from how you did your hair to what shoes you are wearing, so be ready to look fabulous. I have come to the conclusion that many us of expect that the guy who has asked the other out, not only has planned everything about the date, but also prepared accordingly. Here a few tips that we all should remember:

Be courteous, never pushy Don’t ever forget your etiquette, be sure that he will be keeping an eye on who you are, and perhaps more importantly on the things that you aren’t really doing. Those little details that you might think don’t matter make a huge difference. Say something good about your date First of all, we all like to hear compliments, so why not give one to your date? Many of us forget to notice and compliment our date’s appearance. There must be something about his or her outfit, hair or cologne that you like.

La primera cita, Help us keep bringing you una montana Utah’s Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Rusa de Transgender News and Entertainment. emociones By Gus Hererro

THANK your advertisers for supporting us. puzzle solutions

Cryptogram: These are protections no family should be without.

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l conseguir la primera cita es un paso importante al asegurarnos una interesante y emocionante comienzo de una relación. La primera cita es todo sobre una impresión rápida y precisa. Tu cita notara todo, desde como te peinaste ese día hasta los zapatos que usas, entonces estate listo para lucir fabuloso. He llegado a la conclusión que muchos de nosotros esperamos que el que nos ha invitado a salir, no solo haya planeado todo, sino que también se haya preparado de acuerdo con nuestras expectativas. Aquí, algunos tips que debemos de tener en cuenta: Se cortes, nunca insistente No te olvides de usar tu etiqueta, el estará siempre poniendo atención en quien eres, y tal vez muchos mas importante que eso, en las cosas que tu no haces. Estos pequeños detalles que tal vez tu pienses no son importantes hacen una gran diferencia. Di algo bueno acerca de tu cita Primero que todo, a todos nos gusta que nos den cumplidos, entonces por que no dar uno a tu cita? Muchos de nosotros olvidam-

Ask questions, but remember you are not a journalist I know that you’ll be wanting to make sure that you are better and why not, more original than the previous guy. And sometimes this can mean that you’ll spend a lot of time talking about things that you have accomplished while forgetting to ask your date about his or her interests. I know its important to keep the conversation flowing but please you are not playing the journalist role, so get over yourself right now. Ask your date about him; just don’t turn it into an interview with his bishop.

Always have a plan B

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By Jack Fer

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When I say plan B I don’t mean have another date just in case the first one doesn’t work out. What I mean is if your plans don’t work out; relax (you are cool). You can always trust in your plan B to make the most of what might have been should be a wasted night. Your date will be impressed by your creativity. Don’t forget that any backup least, and option is better than no option at all. Just don’t gets of se take your date home and try to get in his pants, this is not that kind of date, or is it?

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Go get them tiger!

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I strongly believe that with these few tips, one tive. In the can score. You’ll not only impress your date but record of g also exceed all his expectations. Just remember one more thing, be sincere and For your h thoughtful and, of course, have the control of all extend yo the details. He will totally be craving more by the GEMI end of the night.

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M a os de hacer notar y dar cumplidos a nuestras the world citas. Debe de haber algo sobre tu cita que to live in a puedes usar. Haz preguntas, pero recuerda que tu creative e children in no eres un periodista Tu querrás asegurarte que eres mejor y C mucho mas original que el tipo que salio anT tes con tu cita. A veces esto puede significar que puedas tomar mucho tiempo hablando y de cosas que tu haz conseguido, olvidánroots, let g dote acerca de los intereses de tu cita. Se and sexua que es importante el llevar y mantener una conversación fluyente, pero por favor, tu no are very ca

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eres un periodista, no preguntes demasiadas cosas. Pregúntale muchas cosas, pero eso si no olvides que tu no eres su Obispo.

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LEO M a Ten siempre un plan B Cuando digo ten un plan B no significa que grossly exa best way o estés guardando un haz bajo la manga y tengas a otro tipo esperando por ti. A lo que — What W me refiero es que si tus planes no funcioyour “Rick nan, relájate, ( tu eres cool). Puedes estar tively. tranquilo y confiar en tu plan B para que tu cita sea excelente y no sentirte que la noche VI se malgasto. Tu cita se sentirá impresionada If por tu creatividad. No te olvides que un plan c B es mejor que no tener ningún plan. Por tions at w favor no lleves a tu cita a tu casa y trates de “coger” esta no es ese tipo de cita o si? thing serio honey cou Por ultimo! Ve y conquístalos tigre! Creo firmemente que con estos simples tips, LIB uno puede conquistar a quien sea. No solo Cr impresionaras a tu cita sino que asimismo excederás todas sus expectativas. a

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Q scopes You can do it, Pisces! By Jack Fertig

Neptune and Saturn remain in hard aspect, confusing boundaries of logic/science and religion/art/fantasy. Venus and Jupiter can usually be counted on to improve most situations, but they’re also in hard aspects complicating negotiations while boosting selfrighteousness and misguided optimism. Don’t sugarcoat difficulties. Deal with them!

nother work out. ARIES (March 20–April 19) k out; relax Standing up for yourself can strain your plan a partnership. Advice from friends e been should be taken very carefully. Listen at essed backup least, and be polite. There may be some nugust don’t gets of sense you can work with. is pants,

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TAURUS (April 20–May 20) People offering to promote you may be more well-meaning than effecps, one tive. In the end you can only trust your own date but record of good work and your own instincts. incere and For your health’s sake be careful not to overntrol of all extend yourself.

ore by the

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GEMINI (May 21–June 20) Most arguments are a waste of time and energy, especially now. Imagine nuestras the world you would want future generations cita que to live in and let that dream inspire your que tu creative efforts. Learn what you can from the children in your life. or y CANCER (June 21–July 22) salio anTo meet the great opportunities significar ablando you face now, find strength in your vidánroots, let go of fear and distractions. Charm ita. Se and sexual charisma can work for you if you ner una or, tu no are very careful not to overplay them.

masias, pero Obispo.

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LEO (July 23–August 22) Misunderstandings with your partner are inevitable. Playing them into fica que grossly exaggerated caricature may be the best way of getting to the root of them. WWLD nga y A lo que — What Would Lucy Do? Unlike Lucy, talk with uncioyour “Ricky” and play out the farce cooperas estar tively. a que tu la noche VIRGO (August 23–September 22) esionada If there’s diabetes in your family, e un plan check your own risk factors. Flirtan. Por tions at work or the gym can grow into somerates de o si? thing serious. Be careful, though. That new honey could incur some hard expenses! tigre! ples tips, LIBRA (September 23–October 22) No solo Creative efforts aimed at improving mismo a relationship are likely to go awry.

Your usual brilliance at anticipating others’ desires is on strike now. That’s OK. They’ll love it when you ask.

p

SCORPIO (October 23–Nov. 21) Volunteer work in your community could be a disillusioning experience. So who need illusions? Growing up and getting real can be harsh, but it makes you more effective. You can still keep your ideals alive even with a clearer, more aware perspective.

[

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22–Dec. 20) The fun and games don’t seem to stop, but what purpose do they serve? Are they helping you toward your longrange goals? Some diversion and relaxation is necessary, but don’t get carried away!

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CAPRICORN (December 21–Jan. 19) You’re at a career peak, but wondering what’s the point? That’s always a good question as long as you’re really looking for an answer. Look deep and hard at where you came from to get a clearer sense of where you’re going.

q

AQUARIUS (January 20–Feb. 18) Trying to reconcile opposing viewpoints can cheat you of the perspective that you will get from understanding each on its own merits. Before you try to master overarching ideas, start with the basic details and work your way up.

w

PISCES (February 19–March 19) Worrying about money is too easy. Meditate and focus on intuiting how and where to build your resources. Yes, it will take hard work, and some of those “intuitions” will have to be filtered through hard, cold reality. It may not be easy, but you can do it!  Q

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esse and I have an unusual friendship — one that requires a fiery tongue and a layer of hard shell. Our other friends and, sometimes, mere strangers look at us like we either hate each other or have it bad for each other. Neither is true ... we simply find verbally bashing each other a relaxing pastime. Yes, sometimes it can turn a bit scathing, which in turn can become physical — usually a single dead-arm punch, sometimes two, which leaves the arm feeling like a rag doll’s. Jesse is ten years my junior and like a little brother to me. He’s been what’s called an orphan for the last fifteen years, having lost his parents to “the big, blue sea.” That’s all he’s ever shared about their deaths. The last three years he’s been sharing a mansion — two wings, ten bedrooms and seven bathrooms — with six other gay guys on the East Bench. Obviously, even with that imaginable square footage, situations can sometimes build to Mommie Dearest-wire hanger proportions between roommates. I once witnessed, during a Christmas party, a screeching fit between two of the roomies after one caught the other kissing his boyfriend on the house’s rooftop patio. The decibel was near glass-shattering, and I had assumed at the time, that such a feat could only be accomplished with a large mouth, like that of Chad Overstreet’s. After the screeching had peeled most of the paint from the walls, party guests were dodging objects that started, in a rash of violence, circumnavigating the room. So in an effort to actually be nice to Jesse, whenever I leave town to see JB and John in West Hollywood or to my brother’s place in San Antonio, I ask Jesse to house-sit my loft: water and talk to my philodendrons and spider plants, and look after the place. Not that I’m worried about leaving the loft empty for an extended period of time, the house plants are hearty; I do it for Jesse as an escape from the beauty-pageant brawls that is often common among gay men who are confined like rabid squirrels. Last week happened to require such a favor. Jesse was, of course, thrilled to flee his home for a few days. However, in my unexpected early return, I happened to find Jesse in, what can only be described as, a compromising position. As the lock clicked gaining me entrance to my loft and then pushing the heavy double-iron door I had a clear view, as always, of the entire living space which includes the bedroom area — a 147-square foot area separated by only a single, free-standing, eight-foot wall of thick, beveled squares and circles of glass intermittently snuggled in cement; a partition I call a life-size tictac-toe game. Behind the glass-game pieces, human shadows were hopping and scurrying about, bumping into each other like ants on the job. I gave a quiet laugh, slipped the key from the lock and said lightheartedly, “Jesse, you little slut!

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Show Utah’s Dist Ove

I hope you plan on buying me new sheets ... actually, let’s just make that an entire new bed.” Jesse emerged from behind the partition with a look of intense guilt, like he’d just killed a puppy. Following him, out stepped my current interest, Billy, who was earnestly slipping an arm through the sleeve of a t-shirt; I immediately noticed a fresh hickey, bruising the milky skin a millimeter below his right nipple, just as it fell out of sight 704 under the shirt being draped over his torso. My mouth dropped open, not in shock, but more in a muted whimper, as if I was the slain ( puppy. My luggage slipped from my hand, www.m thumping on the floor and breaking the awkward silence. “I guess I really do need that new bed,” I accused. “Tommy, I’m sor ...,” Jesse began an apology and stopped when I motioned my head in a don’tClean y even-bother adjuration. Before I even realized what I was doing I began 8 screeching insults and expletives like a 12-yearold girl who needed her mouth washed out with 4UR4P soap. “I Come Finally regaining a smidgen of composure, I decided to flee the situation before I found myself throwing objects at them in another bout of fury. I was shocked to find that my arm felt like a rag doll’s when I attempted to reopen the heavy door, and even more shocked when I slammed into it, Forecas giving myself a shiner. I stumbled backward, tripping over the bag and landing flat on my ass. Like Your Life’s $20 I wasn’t already humiliated enough! It felt like only mere seconds, but when I had shed the pained stupor I found myself lying on the couch with a Ziploc baggie of ice resting on my eye, my head propped on a pillow. Jesse was sitting in a chair across from me. When my good eye focused clearly on him, I thought it would make me sick to even look at him, but it didn’t in faceb the least. It occurred to me that in the few weeks that Billy and I had been going out, I learned very little about him. Before the day’s incident — I call it an incident, it’s somewhat less humiliating — I wasn’t sure how I felt about Billy or our relationship. At least now he made that easy for me. “Where’s Billy?” The question scratched the back of my throat. I removed the ice from my eye. “He left a few minutes ago,” Jesse replied. “He said bye to you, don’t you remember?” Brigh I nodded my head, the bruise over my eye Ogde sweeping across the pillow. “Ow!” I began to laugh uncontrollably — it being as contagious as a Provo yawn, Jesse also burst into laughter. “Let’s go get a beer,” he managed to get out as the laughter reduced to intermittent chuckles. For oth “I can’t go out with a black eye.” He removed the pair of sunglasses propped on his head, “Here, wear these.” Meg I hesitated for a moment, “What the hell, let’s 24/7 Friendly do it. But you get the door.” Q

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