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PRIDE Our Official Guide to Utah
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2018
RED BUTTE GARDEN OUTDOOR
Friday, July 20
RETRO FUTURA BELINDA CARLISLE ABC MODERN ENGLISH AND MORE
CONCERT
Thursday, August 9
LOST 80’S LIVE
A FLOCK OF SEAGULLS WANG CHUNG FARRINGTON & MANN MEN WITHOUT HATS
SERIES
Friday August 10
ANGELIQUE KIDJO’S REMAIN IN LIGHT
FEMI KUTI
& THE POSITIVE FORCE
W W W. R E D B U T T E G A R D E N . O R G / C O N C E R T S
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umfa.utah.edu
Organized by the Art, Design & Architecture Museum, UC Santa Barbara; generous support provided by the Terra Foundation for American Art.
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publisher/editor Michael Aaron
ASSISTANT editor Tony Hobday designer Christian Allred sales Craig Ogan, 801-997-9763 x1 sales@qsaltlake.com contributors Joshua Adamson Pickett, Diane Anderson-Minshall, Chris Azzopardi, Paul Berge, Jeff Berry, Paul Campbell, Laurie Bennett-Cook, Mikki Enoch, Jack Fertig, Greg Fox, Charles Lynn Frost, Oriol Gutierrez Jr., Ryan Haymore, Tony Hobday, Joshua Jones, Christopher Katis, Rock Magen, Sam Mills, Mikey Rox, Terri Schlichenmeyer, Gregg Shapiro, Petunia Pap Smear, Steven Petrow, Ed Sikov, JoSelle Vanderhooft, Ben Williams, D’Anne Witkowski distribution Bradley Jay Crookston,
RJ Graham publisher
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news The top national and world news you should know from last month Military leaders okay with transgender service members The Air Force Chief of Staff General Dave Goldfein told the U.S. Senate that he’s not aware of any adverse effects of transgender military service, joining the sentiment of the other chiefs. Goldfein agreed with Senator Kirsten Gillibrand’s statement: “In the last two weeks (other service chiefs of Army, Marine Corps, and Navy) General Milley, General Neller, and Admiral Richardson have told me that they have seen zero reports of issues of cohesion, discipline, morale as a result of open transgender service in their respective service branches.”
FX strikes a ‘Pose’ FX’s Pose, created by Glee and American Horror Story developer, Ryan Murphy, reputedly features the largest cast of transgender actors in a TV series and the most significant LGBTQ cast in a scripted series. Murphy has announced plans to donate all profits from the new 1980s-themed dance musical to LGBTQ
charitable organizations, especially transgender-focused groups.
PFLAG de-flags Joy-Ann Reid PFLAG pulled MSNBC host, Joy-Ann Reid’s “ally-ship” award due to a report of “homophobic” posts found on her old blog. Reid has apologized for old posts about Florida Congressman Charlie Crist. Yet, she says she didn’t write the newly revealed blog posts. “Nefarious actors planted them to damage my reputation,” she claims. Many media figures question her explanation. Plus, she hasn’t provided proof of “hacking.” PFLAG President Jean Hodges said they dismissed the Crist blogs but, “in light of new information, and the ongoing investigation of that information the organization must at this time rescind our award to Ms. Reid.”
No White House visit for Rippon, Kenworthy Choosing to honor the roar of the crowds at Dancing with the Stars and the GLAAD Media awards, out Olympians Adam Rippon and Gus Kenworthy skipped a historic White House visit by openly gay U.S. Olympic athletes. Rippon tweeted: “Olympians from the 2018 Games have been invited to go to the White House today. I will not be going. I will not stand with people who discriminate against those that they perceive as different.”
Need a lawyer who understands our community? Call Chris Wharton Law • Divorce and Custody • Name and Gender Changes • Adoption and Surrogacy • Criminal Defense • Wills and Trusts Chris is a leading advocate for individuals and families in our community
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HUD shakes a cane at gay bar The Underground Niteclub, a Buffalo, New York gay bar in operation since 1974, was forced to close by the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development over a noise complaint. Since the —Continued on next page
Chris Wharton Law, LLC
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10 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS
early 90s, the bar operated as the Underground or Buffalo Underground on the first floor of a federally-subsidized apartment building from which the complaints came. HUD stated, “While HUD recognizes the community sentiment surrounding the closure of The Underground, the department’s primary duty is to provide safe and decent housing for low-income seniors.”
Gay Grenell goes German Finally, the U.S. Senate confirmed a nominee to be ambassador to Germany. The Senate voted 56-42 to confirm Richard Grenell, filling the vacant position since January 2017. Grenell is a Republican foreign policy writer and commentator who was an aide to national security adviser, John Bolton. Grenell’s confirmation made him the highest-ranking openly gay
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June 2018
official in the Trump Administration.
Pizza at a wedding? Guffaw! An Indiana pizzeria that sparked uproar when in 2015 owners Kevin and Crystal O’Connor said they would sell pizzas to LGBT people but not cater to same-sex weddings. Gay men laughed at the idea of pizza at a wedding. The Indiana legislature passed a since-revised Religious Freedom Restoration Act, validating the pizzeria’s stand. However, Memories Pizza’s closing appears unrelated to the 2015 controversy as the O’Connors said they merely wanted to retire.
Conversion therapy ban in Hawaii Hawaii is the 12th state to ban “conversion therapy” for minors.
Kathy Phelps Equality Education Fund
CALLING FOR APPLICATIONS https://equt.org/2018scholarships
Any student entering or pursuing higher education courses are encouraged to apply. One outstanding student will be awarded a cash scholarship of $3,000, and two students will be awarded cash scholarships of $1,000 each.
SCHOLAR ACTIVIST
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VOLUNTEER
Winners featured in
LEADER
Temporary Pulse memorial opens in Orlando The onePULSE Foundation unveiled its interim memorial n May for the 49 people killed at Pulse nightclub in 2016. The memorial features panels that honor each victim, a collage of photos showing the numerous vigils held after the massacre and commemorative photos. Visitors can also sign their names in a guestbook or on the back of the Pulse sign. A remembrance ceremony will be held at the memorial Tuesday, June 12 — the second anniversary of the massacre. Plans for a permanent memorial and museum are in progress.
Kansas, Oklahoma pass anti-LGBT adoption rights The state legislatures of Kansas and Oklahoma passed legislation forbidding their governments from blocking any foster or adoption agency from participating in state programs solely because it refuses to adopt or place children with LGBT individuals. Kansas Governor Jeff Colyer has indicated he will sign the bill. And Oklahoma Governor Mary Fallin has signed the law allowing private adoption agencies the right to refuse LGBT parents adoption services based on religious beliefs.
SF approves gay, leather cultural district San Francisco has designated a gay and leather cultural district in the city’s South of Market neighborhood following a unanimous vote. The neighborhood, which is already home to many gay businesses and the world-famous leather festival Folsom Street Fair, has faced hiking
rent prices from recent gentrification. The San Francisco Board of Supervisors voted to preserve the neighborhood’s history from the ’70s and ’80s, a stark contrast to the technology business hub it has become. Another recently added LGBT cultural district is in the Tenderloin neighborhood in honor of the Compton’s Cafeteria Riot in 1966.
Milo Yiannopoulos heckled out of NYC bar Milo Yiannopoulos has remained under the radar lately but the former Breitbart editor found himself in the spotlight when he wandered into a Manhattan bar filled with Democratic Socialists of America members. In a video posted on Twitter, he can be seen on his phone while a crowd chants, “Nazi scum get out.” Eventually, he gathers his things and leaves. Yiannopoulos, who got married last year, posted on Instagram that he was afraid he would be “hurt or killed.” Q
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Be prepared. Your lung cancer can spread to your brain. Rose, age 59, Texas
Smoking caused Rose’s lung cancer. She had to move from the small town she loved to get the treatment she needed, including chemo, radiation and having part of her lung removed. Recently, her cancer spread to her brain. You can quit.
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12 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS
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Utah’s lesbian and gay candidates are seeking your support QSaltLake Magazine publisher Michael Aaron pounded the pavement seeking out LGBT political candidates in Utah. He asked these three probing questions of each candidate: What made you decide to run for office? How does being L, G, B, T, Q or + make you a better candidate for office? What would you like to tell QSaltLake readers?
DEBBIE VIGIL FOR HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES, DISTRICT 21 My decision to run for office is my love of politics. Also, I don’t feel that Tooele’s voice is being heard. So, I know I can make a difference. I feel I’m the better candidate because I’m part of the gay community. I have a personal experience that can relate to voters — fighting for our voices to be heard. To the QSaltLake readers, I’m offering my voice in the House of Representatives to advocate for LGBTQ rights, and I stand strong for District 21.
DEREK KITCHEN FOR UTAH STATE SENATE, DISTRICT 2
DEREKKITCHEN.COM, FB.ME/VOTEDEREKKITCHEN
I’m running for office to be an advocate for Salt Lake City residents. It’s most apparent that issues at the city level need a partner in the legislature. Representation matters. It’s important to have someone with an LGBTQ lived experience working with state lawmakers. I’d be a voice for the queer, marginalized, and underrepresented communities. As a Councilmember, I’ve seen firsthand the need for collaboration and bridge-building with the Utah State Legislature. I’m here to advocate for progressive causes like protecting public lands, increased funding for education, and legalized cannabis. I have the experience and the capacity to be a good partner for our city in the legislature. I hope I can count on your support.
LEE CASTILLO FOR HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES, DISTRICT 1
UTAHISFOREVERYBODY.COM, FB.ME/LEECASTILLO4CONGRESS
I was disgusted by our elected officials who failed to stand up for the Utahns Trump attacked — the same people that elected them. I also felt called to share the message with all my LGBTQ community that God loves them just as they are. As a gay Hispanic I have experienced discrimination, injustice, and inequalities. Those experiences helped me understand that the human experience for everyone is the same. We all want treatment of respect, equal opportunities to thrive. I believe that Utah is for everybody, including LGBTQ+ people; and that God is for everybody, including LGBTQ+ people. God wants us to know that sometimes humans get His message wrong and He loves us. And I’d love your support with my campaign.
STEPHEN PECK FOR HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES, DISTRICT 39
VOTESTEPHENPECK.COM
Deciding to run for office was a no-brainer. The inaction and complacency of our current legislation have proven to be a detriment to our well-being and are seriously jeopardizing the prosperity of future generations. Our land, our freedom, and our livelihood are under attack. As a father and a husband, I chose to stand up and say, “No more!” I don’t believe being gay makes me a better candidate. I do believe, however, being gay has instilled a unique understanding of other people. Based on my life experiences, I’m able to better understand the issues the LGBTQ+ community faces. Our fight forges on; it’s nowhere near being over.
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We have fought endlessly to preserve our freedoms, yet all aspects of them are under attack. Join me and the many other candidates across the state who are committed to providing an alternative to the political norm.
MARK CHAMBERS FOR UTAH STATE SENATE, DISTRICT 28
MARK28.COM
After serving on the Springdale Town Council for six years, I was highly encouraged to run for Senate District 28. With the concerns in Utah over our public lands, healthcare, education, and many other issues I’m compelled not to let the Republican incumbent go unchallenged again. Ironically, I’m finding it easier to run as an openly gay man in Southern Utah than as a Democrat. The people I have talked to thus far are supportive when I talk about my husband, but take a step back when I say I’m the Democratic candidate. Everyone needs to stay involved. Vote, sign up and encourage others to join “iwillvote.com”. Support your candidates, volunteer, donate and be active.
JAKE PENROD FOR UTAH STATE SENATE, DISTRICT 21
JAKE4UTAH.COM
I’ve always been interested in politics since I was in third grade. And I started this campaign by fighting for the rights of young politically motivated citizens of this great state. I was turned away twice; told I couldn’t run because of my age, due to a conservative interpretation of the state statute. But in the end, I won the battle. I have lived in District 21 since I was 8 years-old and I look forward to raising my own family here. I’ve always been actively engaged in making this community a better place. I’ve volunteered my time as McGruff the Crime Dog and taught self-defense classes to teachers, church groups, and LGBTQIA+ communities. I express my gratitude for this opportunity and hope you’ll never hesitate to contact me with any questions about my campaign or concerns about our community. I will work for you. Q
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14 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS
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Mormons lag behind country in acceptance of same-sex marriage, but lead in support of nondiscrimination laws BY MICHAEL AARON
Same-sex marriage support has steadily grown in the United States in the past decade and especially since the 2015 U.S. Supreme Court decision legalizing it. Support among members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, however, lags behind the rest of the country. In a study released in early May of
interviews of 40,000 Americans conducted in 2017, the Public Religion Research Institute shows 61 percent support samesex marriage while 30 percent oppose it. Though opposition to same-sex marriage among Mormons has dropped significantly in the past five years since the court decision, falling 68 to 53 percent, evangelical Protestants and Jehovah’s Witnesses join them in opposing samesex marriage. “Opposition to same-sex marriage is now confined to a few of the most conservative Christian religious traditions. Only about one-third (34%) of white evangelical Protestants support same-sex marriage today, while nearly six in ten (58%) are opposed, including 30 percent who are strongly opposed. And 40 percent of Mormons support same-sex marriage, compared to 53 percent who are opposed,” the report states. “Jehovah’s Witnesses, a racially-mixed religious group, are the exception. Thirteen percent support the policy, compared to 63 percent who oppose it. However, nearly
one-quarter (24%) of Jehovah’s Witnesses express no opinion on the issue. A slim majority of young Mormons, 52 percent, believe same-sex marriage should be legal while 32 percent of Mormon seniors agree. In contrast, 87 percent of young Democrats and 63 percent of senior Democrats support same-sex marriage, and 59 percent of young Republicans are in support, compared to 28 percent of Republicans over 65 years of age. Only Mormons and white Evangelicals support the refusal of service to samesex couples based on religious beliefs, the report states. “Most religious groups do not believe small business owners [can] refuse service to gay and lesbian people for religious reasons. Nearly nine in ten (86%) Unitarians and at least seven in ten Buddhists (73%), unaffiliated Americans (72%), and Jewish Americans (70%) oppose such a policy. And roughly two-thirds (65%) of black Protestants and about six in ten white mainline Protestants (60%), Hispanic Catholics (60%), white Catholics (59%), and Muslims (59%) also reject a policy allowing religiously based refusals to serve gay and lesbian people. Majorities of Orthodox Christians (57%), Hindus (56%), and Hispanic Protestants (55%) [oppose] the policy,” the study states. “Two major religious groups believe small business owners in their state [may] refuse service to gay or lesbian
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people on religious grounds — white evangelical Protestants and Mormons. Notably, they support this position at the same rate — 53%.” A majority of nearly all religions support nondiscrimination protections for LGBT people in employment, housing, and public accommodations. Sixty-nine percent of Mormons favor such protections. Half of Jehovah’s Witnesses agree, with 26 percent opposing. “Mormons are unique among religious Americans in their outlook on same-sex marriage and nondiscrimination protections for [LGBT] people. Forty percent of Mormons favor allowing same-sex couples to marry. Yet, nearly 69 percent support laws to protect LGBT people from discrimination in housing, public accommodations, and employment. Among no other major religious group is the gap [between] these two issues larger,” the study states. The last 10 years LDS Church leaders have been vocal in support of nondiscrimination policies in employment and housing. They have shied away from supporting nondiscrimination laws in public accommodations; yet, saying they support “religious freedoms.” They have filed briefs with the U.S. Supreme Court supporting a business’ right to refuse
service based on religious beliefs. Utahns in general favor laws protecting LGBT people against discrimination, more than all other states but Massachusetts at 80 percent.. Q
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International Affirmation Conference coming to Salt Lake LGBTQ+ Mormons from around the globe will gather in Salt Lake City, July 20–22, for the 2018 Affirmation Annual International Conference. The conference commences at the Salt Palace Convention Center and hosted by Affirmation: LGBT Mormons, Families, and Friends. The conference is like no other event in the world. Attendees will join with hundreds of LGBTQ+ Mormons who bring and share various perspectives of what it means for them to be LGBTQ+ and Mormon. No matter a person’s sexual orientation or gender identity; interest or activity level in the The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints; if they are an LGBTQ+ Mormon, a family member, a friend, or a church leader wanting to be supportive, this is the conference for them. Conference attendees will have several opportunities to meet together in affinity groups. The groups allow attendees to discuss similar backgrounds or circumstances. Affirmation affinity groups include active/believing Mormons, faith-transitioning/ ex-Mormons, millennials, mixed-orientation families, people of color, transgender
people, and others. Guest speakers announced for this year’s conference include British actress, Savannah Stevenson; non-profit founder focused on faith and diversity, Rev. Dr. Fatimah S. Salleh; and acclaimed Pixar Animator Emron Grover. Other speakers include the President, Senior Vice President, and Vice President of Affirmation, Carson Tueller, Francisco Ruiz, and Kimberly Anderson. Also announced is a performance by Jeffrey Scott Parsons. He will be performing his one-man autobiographical cabaret, “Comfy,” for conference attendees. The show has played in both Los Angeles and San Diego to glowing reviews. The 2018 Affirmation Annual International Conference early-bird tickets are available at $70 for individuals, $130 for couples, and $190 for families of three or more through June 1. After the early-bird deadline, tickets are $90 per person. For more information, the conference schedule, speaker and performer information, and to purchase tickets, visit internationalconference.affirmation. org. Q
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Utah Stonewall Democrats BBQ raising money for progressive candidates The Utah Stonewall Democrats is once again hosting its Dem Bones barbecue and pot luck fundraiser on Sunday, June 24th at Centennial Park, 5405 W 3100 South. Funds raised go towards helping the elections of progressive Democratic candidates. A suggested donation of $10 per person or $25 for families
requested. If you can contribute a pot luck item they would greatly appreciate it. All Democratic candidates are invited to use this time and space to distribute literature and yard signs as well as sign up volunteers. It’s potluck food, politics and fun. facebook.com/utahstonewalldems
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Utah County billboards show a company’s love for LGBTQ+ Utah County I-15 drivers were greeted with six billboards proclaiming a company’s love for LGBTQ+. Domo CEO Josh James ordered the signs “to use our position to continue promoting a community where everyone feels they belong and are loved.” His full editorial is printed on page 20 of this magazine.
New Utah scholarship aims to help LGBT and ally students BY JOSELLE VANDERHOOFT
A newly formed Kathy Phelps Equality Education Fund has joined with the Utah Pride Center, the Utah Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce, and Equality Utah to create a new scholarship for LGBT students and straight, cisgender allies seeking higher education
to advance LGBT causes. The scholarship is open to students aged 16 and older. It will award one student a $3,000 cash scholarship and two students a $1,000 scholarship. The scholarships are awarded based on student achievements in activism, leadership, scholarship, or volunteerism.
Rather than being based on GPA or need, as many scholarships are, Kathy Phelps said that this scholarship would be awarded based on students’ desire to “demonstrate how furthering their education will help bring about change.” Phelps, who regularly donates to state LGBT charities, said that she got the idea for the scholarship earlier this year when she realized the stress students were under “trying to further their education, work, and pay for school.” “I was a B and C student but was fortunate enough to have the resources to pay for my education,” she said. “With our current [presidential] administration, I think it’s more important than ever to fight for equality, whether that is by an LGBTQ student or as an ally.”
She then reached out to Equality Utah to create the award. Mindy Young, Equality Utah’s developmental director, said that the Utah Pride Center will distribute the scholarship because of its focus on youth services. A panel consisting of members of the Utah Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce, Equality Utah, the Utah Pride Center, and Phelps herself will read through applications in July and select their top 10 choices. Winners will be announced August 30. There is no fee to apply for the scholarship, which is open to applicants until June 30. Winners will be featured in QSaltLake Magazine. To apply for the scholarship, visit equt.org/2018scholarships, Q
Conference: Reducing Intimate Partner Violence
MAKE HD44 SALTY AGAIN Endorsed by the Stonewall Democrats
VoteAndrewStoddard.com
The LGBTQ Affirmative Psychotherapist Guild of Utah is hosting a conference that will present a broad overview of the diverse issues that impact interpersonal violence for sexually and gender diverse individuals and families. It is intended to prepare professionals and advocates to work with this range of issues. Hope and resilience will be an underlying theme for all
sessions, providing inspiration for expanding resources, organizers say. The conference qualifies for six CEUs. It will take place Friday, June 1 beginning at 8:45 a.m. at the Utah State Library, 250 N. 1950 West. The all-day conference is $40, or $25 for students and those with limited income, and includes lunch.Registration is available at lgbtqtherapists.com
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Coronation XLIII under the Big Top
On Friday is the PR Ball, titled Summer Nights, at the Radisson Hotel Wasatch Ballroom. Doors at 6 p.m. and show at 7 p.m. Saturday brings the Outof-Town show where those traveling into the state for the event can show their support for the current reign. Also at the Radisson with doors at 7 p.m., show at 8 p.m. Sunday is the huge Coronation event at the Radisson with doors at 5 p.m. and show at 6 p.m. Entrances by local and out-ofstate royalty will last for hours before the revealing of the new Emperor and Empress. Voting for the new reign takes place Saturday, May 19 at the Radisson Downtown, 215 W South Temple, from noon to midnight. Utahns 18 years and older who live south of Farmington may vote by showing a valid Utah State ID. For a full schedule of events and ticket prices visit rcgse.org/coronation-xlii-2.
National Choreographic Festival may 17–26, 2018
Highlighting the work of female choreographers and artistic directors. week 1: may 17–19
week 2: may 24–26
The Washington Ballet Richmond Ballet Ballet West
Charlotte Ballet Cincinnati Ballet Ballet West
balletwest.org | 801•869•6900
artists of ballet west | photo by beau pearson
The lusty month of May is a time for flowers, warmer weather and, of course, Coronation, the Royal Court of the Golden Spike Empire’s annual stepdown of the past royalty and crowning of the new. Each year, the reigning Emperor and Empress set Coronation’s theme. This year, Empress XLII Tiana La Shaé and Emperor XLII Johnny Disco chose Big Top Coronation. The Memorial Day weekend event begins Thursday, May 24 with the In-Town Show and Awards at the Sun Trapp at 8 p.m.
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quotes “Sometimes it takes more than shouting it to show your pride. It takes more than a sign, a fabulous outfit, or a month of parades. Pride has to resonate from within; shine out to everyone around you.” —Solange Nicole
“It is a testament to my parents that they never reacted negatively to the four-year-long pride parade that marched through their house.” —Tina Fey, Bossypants
“I pride myself on my personality and not my looks because one day, I will be old and crusty with a mustache, and someone is going to love me for my personality and not looks. So whoever is going to marry me is going to laugh till he dies.” —Nargis Fakhri
“It takes no compromise to give people their rights...it takes no money to respect the individual. It takes no political deal to give people freedom. It takes no survey to remove repression.” —Harvey Milk
“Somebody, your father or mine, should have told us that not many people have ever died of love. But multitudes have perished, and are perishing every hour — and in the oddest places —for the lack of it.” — Author James Baldwin
“The single best thing about coming out of the closet is that nobody can insult you by telling you what you’ve just told them.” —Rachel Maddow
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Issue 280 | Qsaltlake.com
guest editorial
Focus on the multitude of lives we represent BY JACKIE BISKUPSKI, SALT LAKE CITY MAYOR
A little
in this country, and has kept communities less than two years ago I came out. Surrounded by of color in poverty. They work to sepapowerful women on the steps of the Caprate us from each other, to define us as itol, I shared my story of being a survivor “single-issue” people, because they know of sexual assault — a piece of my history I together we are a force. thought, until that moment, I would not If we are to truly fight against our opshare publicly. pressors, we must fight against the status As an openly gay elected quo. As LGBTQ+ people — as official in a conservative state, champions for equality — we “There is no I am often asked what my have a responsibility to examsuch thing as greatest challenge has been ine our own movement and the a single-issue in getting where I am today. way we live our lives to search More often than not, my struggle, because for opportunities to dismantle answer tends to surprise the this construct. This includes we do not live interviewer: being a woman. against the casual, and single-issue lives.” fighting And as the mother of two often overt, racism, sexism, young boys of color, I never forxenophobia, and classism which get the awesome responsibility has crept into our community—from datI have to raise them in a society which too ing apps to representation and leadership often seems determined to hold them back roles in our community. because of the color of their skin. The LGBTQ+ community has a unique For me, Pride is a time to remember and responsibility to help lead the fight for reaffirm what activist Audre Lorde once civil rights. In many ways, for the last said: “There is no such thing as a sindecade, the LGBTQ+ rights movement has gle-issue struggle, because we do not live been synonymous with equality. We have single-issue lives.” claimed as our own, and even copyrighted, Pride will always be about celebrating the symbol which will forever be linked to and honoring who we are and the common the term. bonds which unite us. But, our commitBut, more importantly, ours is a movement to equity demands that Pride must ment of many. We are women, men, and also be a time where we find strength in non-binary individuals, we are immigrants our differences and in the unique experiand refugees, we are individuals with ences among us. disabilities, and we are people of every Over the past year-and-a-half, the faith, ethnic background and income LGBTQ+ community has once again felt level. To truly be successful in protecting the sting of hurtful rhetoric and damaging our families and ensuring the long-term policies designed to undo all we have acsuccess of the LGBTQ+ community, it is complished. We have learned, as many beimperative we focus our movement not on fore us have, that the fight for civil rights is a single-issue, but on the multitude of lives more than a moment, it is a movement. we represent. We have also seen clearly, that those As we celebrate Pride, especially during who work to undermine our lives as trying political times, let us remember LGBTQ+ people, do so in an attempt to that together we are a force. Let us find maintain power and preserve the stastrength in our differences and energy tus-quo. A status-quo which has kept in our diversity to not only resist, but to women out of the boardroom and halls of power, kept immigrants from opportunity rise. Q
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GAY WRITES
A DiverseCity Series writing group A program of Salt Lake Community College’s Community Writing Ctr. The group meets the 2nd and 4th Monday of each month, 6:30-8 pm, Salt Lake City Library Square, 210 E. 400 South, Ste. 8, Salt Lake.
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THE TRANSCENDING GENDER PROJECT T R A N S C E N D I N G G E N D E R .O R G CREDIT: @EMOPRETEEN
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guest editorial
CEOs should focus on LGBTinclusive culture BY JOSH JAMES, DOMO CEO
I’ve been
leading companies in Utah and therefore pitching our state while recruiting people to this community for over 20 years now. Much has transpired in that period of time. Like the rest of the country, our community is evolving. We are becoming more diverse, which necessitates greater awareness, acceptance and inclusion. Sometimes change makes people uncomfortable, but change often comes about for good reason. In a world dominated by capitalism, profits and returns, the impact of companies on their communities used to be last on the list
of priorities for shareholders. However, over the years, I’ve observed that our company’s social impact directly ties more and more to our ability to recruit and retain the best people, investors, and to acquire the best customers. An inclusive and diverse culture makes for a better company. I feel so lucky to call Utah home. There isn’t anywhere in the world I would rather work and live. I believe we have an accepting and loving culture, and I’m proud when visitors tell me how they think Utahns are so kind and nice. I totally agree! Because of that, I am saddened when I hear of any injustices,
Qsaltlake.com |
hate or prejudices that occur in our state. Even though I believe our state is primarily made up of wonderful people who love anyone and everyone exactly the same, there is no denying that we have a fairly homogenous state that by its very nature creates challenges that deserve a special focused effort in order to be countered. To that end, I believe we should go the extra mile. Earlier this year, I watched a documentary about LGBTQ+ in our community, and it is undeniably thought provoking. A point the film made is LGBTQ+ youth don’t feel accepted and that lack of acceptance is a major factor in the increased rate of teen suicide. While the extent of the impact on these numbers is sometimes debated, it is clearly not zero. As some of my friends have dealt with this topic personally or with their children, I’ve witnessed this definite feeling of exclusion. I feel a sense of urgency and an obligation to help. I started asking people who are close to the issue and asking parents of LGBTQ+ youth about how to make a positive impact. Through these conversations, it became increasingly clear that letting these teens know they are loved just as they are, and that they have support from others around them, is one of the most important things we can do. The more we talk about inclusion, the more equipped we will all be in communicating first and foremost that we love and care for each other as we all go through this struggle and experience we call life. Accordingly, this week, our six billboards along I-15, the main interstate corridor, will have a message for Utah’s LGBTQ+ population and the world at large. The message is that Domo loves them, and loves everyone for that matter, regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, age or any other factor that could make a person feel isolated. The billboards are not intended to endorse one population over another; our only intention is for Domo to
Issue 280 |
June 2018
use our position to continue promoting a community where everyone feels they belong and are loved. As communities become more diverse, we need to make sure our workplaces are welcoming and inclusive for everyone. Utah exists today because it was a refuge for people who were isolated and persecuted. I personally tie directly into that past, and while probably trivial by others’ standards, I definitely have experiences being mocked, misunderstood, belittled, attacked and even discriminated against because of who I am, what I believe, and how I was raised. Not surprisingly, I absolutely hate to see any person ever persecuted whether intentionally or unintentionally because of how they look, think, feel or act. I spoke with numerous people coming from many different backgrounds before arriving at this decision to put these billboards up, and I really hope the decision shows two things. First, Domo is committed to being inclusive. We want the best employees wherever they may exist and whatever they believe and whoever they are. And second, it extends the collective effort to show we are becoming even more loving and accepting of everyone. As a human being, a parent of six daughters (with a son on the way), and also as the CEO of a company with hundreds of employees, I feel there is a real opportunity for us to demonstrate that standing up and being overtly inclusive and welcoming is the right way for us to continue to represent our great state. To other CEOs and business leaders, I challenge you to find your own ways to build more inclusive communities. You don’t need billboards to do that, you just need to be willing to start the conversations that spur awareness and actions to make everyone feel included. Q Josh James attended Brigham Young University into his senior year, but did’t graduate. In 2010, he founded Domo, a software-as-a-service company based in American Fork, Utah.
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Issue 280 | Qsaltlake.com
guest editorial
LDS President Nelson can bring church into 21st Century BY FRED KARGER
2018 is
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proving to be a year of big change for the Mormon church. The passing of President Thomas S. Monson in January opened the way for Russell M. Nelson to become the 17th president of the church. During this month’s General Conference, Nelson made significant changes to the church. He announced the first Latino apostle as well as the first Asian-American apostle, adding diversity to the church’s top leadership for the very first time. He also announced the elimination of the home teaching and visiting teaching programs, and the building of seven new temples. One doesn’t have to look very deep to find some of the reasoning behind these changes. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints reported its slowest growth in over 80 years. Young people are leaving in droves. A recent survey reported that the No. 1 reason American millennials are leaving the church is the way that it treats its LGBTQ members, with tens of thousands of Mormons resigning from the church as a result. An official church document posted a year ago by Ryan McKnight’s MormonLeaks shows that 55,000 millennials left in 2005 alone. That was 13 years ago, well before California’s Prop 8, when search engines on the internet were pretty new and before a decade of terrible PR for the church. How many church members are actually resigning or becoming inactive now?
The church has been closing many of its administrative units in Europe. Growth in Latin America is stagnant. The church recently announced it was closing its Missionary Training Centers in Spain and Chile along with visitors centers in England, New Zealand and right here in Park City. The changing demographics of the church mean big trouble for another reason: money. American members and families, the church’s main source of tithing revenue, are leaving in droves. As U.S. growth declines, no number of foreign converts can make up for that. Nelson is facing a crisis for Mormonism and, at 93, he knows he does not have a lot of time to leave a lasting impact and right the ship before it takes on more water. After Monson passed away, his New York Times obituary strongly criticized his handling of human rights issues, especially on women and the LGBTQ community through all the church’s political activity under his leadership. The epidemic of suicides by Mormon teenagers continues to haunt the church and is reason enough to rescind its ugly November 2015 policy that bans LGBTQ Mormons and their families from the church. And right now, the Mormon church is in the middle of another major crisis. Survivors of sexual abuse perpetrated by high-ranking Mormon leaders are coming forward to tell their stories, beginning
what many are calling the #MormonMeToo moment. The case of McKenna Denson is getting more and more attention from national media. Her recording of her abuser’s confession has gone viral. Yet she is not the only one. Many other brave victims of sexual assault are telling their stories, as we saw recently in Martinsburg, W.Va., where nine former Mormon families sued the church for its cover-up of pedophile Michael Jensen. This represents a pattern within the LDS Church, where victims are silenced instead of empowered and perpetrators are protected. These are the times that call for action and the change that many hope the Mormon church will undergo. These are certainly challenges to the reputation and the credibility of the church, yet they also represent opportunities. Nelson can step up and work to right the wrongs made by the church and open it up to all. Real change won’t just benefit the church, but will help the state of Utah and the most vulnerable around the world. The time for change is now. It’s up to Nelson to decide whether he will continue to lead a wave of change or whether he will fight the current and keep the church stuck in its old ways. We hope that he will be remembered as the “prophet of change” and bring the Mormon church into the 21st century. Q Fred S. Karger was the first openly gay presidential candidate in a major political party and served as a senior consultant to the campaigns of presidents Ronald Reagan, George H. W. Bush and Gerald Ford. As founder of Mormon Tips he investigates The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints’ campaigns to repeal same-sex marriage laws.
In the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and sharing of pleasures. For in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed. – Khalil Gibran Serving in two Gayborhoods: East Harvey Milk District, 912 East Harvey Milk Blvd – 801-521-4572 1515 South 15th East – 801-484-9259 MAZZACAFE.COM
*Beer and wine only at 15TH & 15TH
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Issue 280 |
June 2018
mr. manners
Nothing says Pride
Know your history/herstory
As a
like Rainbow roses
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frequent viewer of RuPaul’s Drag Race, I am familiar with the saying which has made “mother” legendary. I’m reminded, as we prepare for Pride, of her telling the contestants to “Know your HERstory!” Although I’m no supermodel, it feels essential that we know our history and reminded who provided our ability to celebrate freely. So, how did it all start? The Stonewall Rebellion of 1969 is widely considered the beginning of the modern LGBT rights movement. The six-day riots began inside the Stonewall Inn in the Greenwich Village neighborhood of New York City. It was the breaking point of years of tensions between police and lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender street youth, and pedestrians. On the morning of June 28, the NYPD First District raided the bar. The drag queens and street youth fought back. There were reports of stilettos, bottles, coins, bricks, and debris thrown. The altercation finally spilled out into the streets and as word spread, more LGBT people from surrounding neighborhoods joined the riot. So, the rebellion marked the beginning of the modern LGBT rights movement. After Stonewall, many LGBT people — including those who didn’t witness the rebellion — felt inspired to contribute to the cause. Gay rights had entered the national spotlight. LGBT people began organizing, protesting, and mobilizing. As for Utah,
“Pride” began in 1977 when the Salt Lake Coalition for Human Rights sponsored a three-day conference. On June 27, 1990, the first Pride parade in the state took place at the Utah State Capitol Building. It began on the steps of the capitol, moved down Main Street, and ended on South Temple at the Utah Museum of Contemporary Art. Despite the many difficulties we face as LGBT people, especially in Utah, the past has been one of progress, and the future of LGBT equality has changed from the improbable to the inevitable. Progress is evolutionary, and when the force of LGBT activism is at its greatest heights then we achieve full equality. The diversity within the LGBT community is more known today than when the first transgender street youth threw her stiletto at an oppressive police officer. As Pride approaches, it’s time to celebrate the diversity within the ranks of LGBT people — to build a true community. We must be representative of the entire rainbow, of different likes, ideals, and hues, linked as a common colorful thread. Just as RuPaul says, “If you don’t love yourself, how in the hell are you going to love someone else” — I extend this to accepting all the colors in our LGBT rainbow. Take this month to celebrate our Pride history and involve everyone who plays a vital role in securing our future. We know the past, let’s write a better future. Q
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who’s your daddy
Celebrate Your Pride!
Winking Proudly BY CHRISTOPHER KATIS
Twenty
years ago, I worked at this small public relations firm in San Francisco called Access Partners. It was a whacky place. We held morning staff meetings seated at a round table so no one would be at the head and no one spoke until the “spirit” moved them. Sometimes we practiced our winking skills. The crazy juxtaposition to all this business peculiarity is because wealth managers and investment banks comprised our client base. I literally would go from practicing winking to working on getting my clients quoted in The Wall Street Journal. It was through one client that I met my friend, Jan. For whatever reason, we hit it off and — although we’ve never met one another in person — we have maintained a friendship for two decades. A handful of times a year I call Jan at her 200-year-old farmhouse on Cape Cod to check in and catch up. She starts and ends every conversation the same way: by telling me how proud she is of us. And that makes me proud. We are far from being perfect parents. The boys are far from being ideal children. Of course, no parent is perfect; no child is ideal. But I sometimes think gay parents push themselves and their kids to try to meet those standards. Maybe it’s the fact that we so often have to jump through seemingly unending hoops to become parents, or perhaps it’s a perverse need to prove naysayers wrong. Either way, I for one am proud of our efforts. Pride is about celebrating the accomplishment of living our lives openly, happily, and equally. Although we designate one weekend in June to gather together to revel in these accomplishments — in reality, pride is an everyday occurrence.
And for LGBT parents, our kids help make that true. Kids make gay parents lead a life that is open and proud. We have no choice but to come out to a myriad of people whether we want to or not. Over the past 15 years that Kelly and I have been dads, we’ve had to come out to other parents, coaches, teachers, doctors, Scout leaders, neighbors — you name them, and we’ve outed ourselves to them. Kids make gay parents challenge the status quo. Standing awkwardly while the front desk person at a pediatrician’s office tries to decide which of the two men standing in front of her should be listed as the boys’ mother was worth getting the office to change their forms. Sometimes we get surprised. Like Gus’s first Sunday school teachers, who took it upon themselves to ask him whom he wanted to make a Mother’s Day gift for, and gave him options. And there was a Cub Scout leader, who long before the ban was lifted, said she didn’t care what the “rule” was, a gay dad was just the same as a straight dad when it came to assistant leaders…and in everything else. The reason I’m willing to go through all this is simple: I’m very proud of my family. My kids are amazing. Kelly is an awesome dad. And me? Well, I have more faults than the California Coast, but I try. I admit that I’m my toughest critic. I go to bed every night wishing I had been a better dad that day. But kind words of encouragement from family and friends help me go on. I’m incredibly thankful that my friend Jan is proud of us. I’m proud of us too. And she hasn’t even seen me wink! Happy Pride, everyone! Q
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June 2018
lambda lore
The start of AIDS activism in Utah BY BEN WILLIAMS
Only two
AIDS informational and support groups existed in Utah at the beginning of 1986. They were the AIDS Project Utah and the Salt Lake AIDS Foundation. Both were fledgling organizations having been formed independently of each other in the fall of 1985. APU Director Duane Dawson organized workshops based on the Shanti program which became the organization’s focus. APU hoped to provide in-home and onsite patient “emotional and practical support” for people dying from symptoms associated with AIDS. In 1986, AIDS activist John Lorenzini joined APU after serving in AIDS organizations in Los Angeles and San Francisco. Lorenzini was also past co-chair of the National Association of People With AIDS for three years. His abilities and knowledge of the politics of AIDS significantly strengthened APU resources. Before coming to Utah, Lorenzini had chained himself to the doors of the United States DHHS in San Francisco to protest the department not releasing AIDS funds. He acted alone, and arrested while wearing a T-shirt stating “I am a person with AIDS.” His action was the second recorded instance of AIDS civil disobedience, and he was the first AIDS activist arrested for protesting against the government. Lorenzini and registered nurse, Elizabeth Van Der Burgh, who served on the APU Board of Trustees, began training sessions for the Utah Department of Social Services. Eventually, she trained over 700 department employees. In December 1986, Lorenzini and Van Der Burgh were presented a special award by the Department of Social Services and signed by Governor Norm Bangerter for their AIDS training sessions. Lorenzini eventually left APU and returned to California where he died in 1990 from symptoms associated with AIDS.
Dawson resigned Aug. 5, 1986, suffering from burn-out. However, he stated: “I think we’ve built up a rapport with the medical community to the point that all newly diagnosed patients are referred to us. So we must be doing something right.” The Board of Trustees of APU then selected Richard Cochran as its new director. Cochran was the first director of an AIDS service organization in the United States diagnosed with AIDS. APU stated they were sponsoring an “AIDS Awareness Week” for the end of October 1986. Salt Lake Mayor Palmer DePaulis and
Funding was an ongoing concern for both APU and SLAF as no financial help was forthcoming from the state. Utah’s Health Department had received a grant of $117,286 from the CDC to develop programs aimed at AIDS prevention. However, Dr. Craig Nichols, the state epidemiologist, refused to print safe-sex guidelines. Utah Governor Norm Bangerter had declared the last week in October as AIDS Awareness Week. Cochran, however, was unaware that the Royal Court had two previous fundraising AIDS Awareness Weeks. His lack of experience with the greater gay community would eventually lead to his resignation. At the end of September 1986, RCGSE Emperor X Scott Stites, and Emperor XI Robb Bullock, hosted the Royal Court’s AIDS Awareness Week and raised nearly $4,600 for AIDS education and services. Nearly all the funds raised to assist people living with AIDS was generated by, or through, the RCGSE.
On Oct. 24, 1986, AIDS Project Utah sponsored — as part of their AIDS Awareness Week — a fundraiser called “That’s What Friends Are For: A Gala Benefit Event”. The benefit was held at [Abravanel] Symphony Hall and featured comedienne Roseanne Barr. She was at the time barely starting out in her career as a stand-up comic known for her Domestic Goddess routine. Barr’s brother Ben was a member of the APU Gala planning committee. Some 900 people attended the gala; however, Cochran created a faux pas at the end of the program when he expressed his gratitude for this “the first AIDS Awareness Week”. Many in the community took offense at what appeared to be a slight to the Court which eventually caused a rift between it and APU. After the APU’s gala, Cochran stepped down due to health reasons and the rift in the gay community he inadvertently created. The APU Board of Trustees then appointed former assistant director Ben Barr as Cochran’s successor. Barr’s initial affiliation with the group was as an emotional-support volunteer. Barr immediately began smoothing out hurt feelings and made APU a part of the community and not a separate entity. The other AIDS organization going through growing pains in 1986 was the Salt Lake AIDS Foundation. Dr. Patty Reagan was the founder of SLAF. She was a popular University of Utah associate professor of health and had returned to Utah in May 1985 from a sabbatical at the UC Berkeley doing post-doctoral work. The Bay Area was at the hub of the AIDS crisis on the West Coast. Plus, UC Berkeley had a million-dollar grant for AIDS epidemiology study. Upon returning to Utah, Dr. Reagan stated, “My concern coming back to Utah was that no one was doing anything as far as AIDS education. I’ve discovered individuals and groups, a lot within the gay men’s
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community, are doing everything from collecting money to providing emergency food and housing, to forming AIDS support groups.” Dr. Reagan said that because of the stigma of AIDS, gay men faced a whole new set of social stresses due to the loss of jobs, loss of housing, and loss of support in and out of the gay community. She stated, “It’s my job as a sex educator to help eliminate or eradicate the AIDS myths.” Part of what the foundation did was through an AIDS support line providing “accurate health information and referrals”. Previous to the SLAF’s information line, the only resource for AIDS information in Utah was a national 800-number, limited to certain hours of the day. The AIDS information line originated out of donated space within the Wasatch Women’s Center. Dr. Reagan paid $70 a month to maintain the phone line. Dr. Reagan said regarding the role of women during the AIDS crisis, “Women are at a unique place to turn their energy and personal resources against AIDS.” Additionally, she stated, “Women are playing a special role in the AIDS crisis. Not because we are biologically nurturers, men are that too. Women are the best possible ones physically and emotionally to deal with AIDS. We are at the least risk.” Funding was an ongoing
concern for both APU and SLAF as no financial help was forthcoming from the state. Utah’s Health Department had received a grant of $117,286 from the CDC to develop programs aimed at AIDS prevention. However, Dr. Craig Nichols, the state epidemiologist, refused to print safe-sex guidelines. He stated, “We will probably cover every area except the Safer Sex area… Most of the material produced is too graphic for a state health department publication.” Dr. Nichols felt that explicit discussion of the risks of AIDS from sex must come from the gay community itself, saying, “I don’t feel like we bear the total responsibility. And so we’ll do things we know we can do and are acceptable. And other groups will have to fill in where they think there’s a deficit.” Dr. Reagan argued with Nichols about the lack of funding. She reported to him “how badly we needed the help because the gay community was working hard to help itself.” “If the gay community can help itself, I don’t see why the health department should be doing anything else,” Dr. Nichols told her. Q Sen. Jim Dabakis calls Ben Williams the “best damned historian alive today.” Join Ben at the Salt Lake City Public Library Marmalade Branch, 280 W. 500 North, on the first Wednesdays of the month for the Utah Stonewall Historical Society Lecture Series.
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First Wednesdays at 7pm at the Marmalade Branch Salt Lake City Public Library 280 W 500 N Info at bit.ly/UGHS_Lecture Read ‘This Day in Gay Utah History’ at benwilliamsblogger.blogspot.com
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Robert Oscar Lopez
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Issue 280 |
BY D’ANNE WITKOWSKI
Hey
gentlemen, if you’re a gay and want to become a heterosexual, you can do it today in 10 easy steps with this one weird trick called self-hatred and denial! Well, that’s two weird tricks, but still. At least that’s what blogger Robert Oscar Lopez wants you to believe. He was raised by lesbians and it apparently ruined him to the point where he has become the expert on ex-gaying. On the Barb Wire website (tagline: Barb Wire dot com: We print all the garbage that gets stuck to the fence) Lopez has posted, “Rebuking the Big Lie: Ten Tips for Ex-Gay Happiness.” And if you’re wondering, “Hey, can I really be ex-gaypy (that’s ex-gay happy, obviously) in just 10 steps? Well, no. Lopez has a lot of “10 Tips” type blog posts on his website for the ex-gay curious. Perhaps he learned how to blog from Clickbait (But Not In A Gay Way) University. So once you add “Ten Dating Suggestions for Ex-Gay Men in Pursuit of Women” and “Ten Things to Love About Heterosexuality,” not to mention “The Ex-Gay’s Strategy on Women: Many Top Tens In One,” we’re talking about a lot of steps. Needless to say, Lopez has some, er, really messed up ideas about this whole gay thing. First of all, he seems to think that men (and his focus is on gay men here, sorry lesbians) become gay after being tricked into it. “[G]ay activists can flood
you with stimuli and arousal techniques to make you curious or interested in homosexuality,” Lopez writes. “Once you try it or find yourself thinking about it, cultural messages and cues all around you mess with your head and convince you that this is who you are, you have to make yourself sexually available to other guys.” Now if he were describing heterosexuality this might make some sense. Since the majority of people are heterosexual, we are surrounded by images of heteronormativity. In fact, if you want to get “flooded” with gay “stimuli and arousal techniques” you pretty much have to seek it out. Otherwise that flood is more like an occasional trickle (see Will & Grace, the gays on Modern Family, Ellen, et al.). He then writes, “I don’t have much more time before…” and I’m thinking, ‘Oh no, is he going to die?’ But he continues, “Before the law makes it illegal for me to share the ten tips I will share in this blog.” There’s no law against sharing dumb lies on the internet, or Donald Trump would be in prison where he belongs. Lopez warns that leaving gay life is hard. “There are certain perks about being gay that you are going to miss,” he writes. “For instance, if you identify as gay, people pity you and give you less responsibility for being a jerk.” Oh man, wait until he hears about Milo Yiannopoulos. Lopez continues, “The world feels small and cozy
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because everywhere you go, you can go to the gay bar and have instant community.” Okay, wait a minute. There are gay bars everywhere? That is news to me and will likely be news to millions of gay people around the world who live (checks map) near no gay bars. But I guess Lopez sees every bar as a Homosexual Cheers, “where everybody knows you’re gay.” “Once you commit to not being gay anymore, things will get hard,” he writes. “In the gay world, you may have competed from time to time for the attention of men with nice physiques; now, you will be fighting against men with even more well-developed physiques, trying to achieve victory over them in order to win for yourself a coveted prize: a virtuous and desirable wife.” Aaaaaand fuck off. Women
are not prizes. Women are human beings who have value and worth outside of whether or not they are somebody’s wife. “Soon you will see how much harder life is for straight guys,” laments Lopez. And he’s probably right that life is harder for him now that he’s “straight.” Self-hatred and denial are a bitch. But straight guys in general? Nah. They’ve been riding roughshod over all of us and continue to do so. It’s my hope that Lopez will one day write a “Top Ten Reasons Not to Hate Your Gay Self.” But until then, I wonder if he’ll put “riding roughshod” on his “Top Ten Gay Stimuli and Arousal Techniques.” Q D’Anne Witkowski is a poet, writer and comedian living in Michigan with her wife and son. She has been writing about LGBT politics for over a decade. Follow her on Twitter @MamaDWitkowski.
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June 2018
the yodeler
Selfie Animalia, part 4: The follies of fowls BY RYAN HAYMORE
I certainly
hope the Woodland Spectrum wasn’t too much for anyone to handle. I hope we all have tufts of hair and a butt that lurches into the world and acts as a carnivorous orchid — you know, the man-eating ones, wink, wink! Thus, the world of selfies is proving to be more vast than we ever imagined. And I bet you’ve been looking differently at or at least paying more attention to the way you’ve been snapping your selfies as of late. Therefore, we must move onward and keep capturing
COUPLES
and identifying these selfies. We must learn that we’re not bound to one selfie type, nor one selfie type exists in a social media environment. We aren’t a slice of Wonder bread; we’re diverse, gorgeous specimens of men and women, set forth to make eyes divert and minds consider the possibilities of our many boudoir-specific talents. However, when it comes to the illustrious, there also stands the Pigeon selfie-taker. A Pigeon selfie is one in which the person holds a big, blank stare. The face looks
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like someone smeared numbing cream all over it from chin to brow. The Pigeon selfie-taker usually isn’t one to take a selfie alone. He will capture his paralyzed face with people posing with him or in the background. For some, the Pigeon selfie is a stare only the most crossfaded of sinners gives Jesus wearing a rainbow wig. To others, the Pigeon selfie is one that demonstrates the contours of the face when not smiling. I say to each his own, but it gives a new meaning to the phrase “feed the birds, tuppence a bag.” The next selfie-taker is one that is opposite of the Pigeon. The Darling Dove is the selfie-taker that takes selfies, of which look nice, with different significant others every other week. He changes significant others before he changes bedsheets. Kudos must go to this selfie-taker. It isn’t easy convincing someone to pose with the Darling Dove for a profile picture knowing that last week his profile picture included someone else. Is a couple’s selfie a doomsday gift to the relationship? It seems the Darling Dove, while taking gorgeous selfies, is doomed to repeat the ever-changing scenery of significant others. His selfie may give a view into the cemetery of his past relationships or that his selfie skills are as diverse as last month’s partners. While the Darling Dove is a bit flighty with significant others, the Hummingbird self-
ie-taker is flighty with natural scenery. The Hummingbird is the selfie-taker who snaps that perfect shot in front of a different world landmark every other month. It may seem as though this selfie-taker is either jet-setting around the globe or has life-like backdrops in the basement. Either way, the Hummingbird manages to pair his face with the world’s landscapes like a versatile fine wine. The Hummingbird is likely pictured in front of a landmark, enjoying a bizarre meal, or with a group of strangers. The Hummingbird is fast but will have memories that last for 13 lifetimes. To ask where in the hell all that money for food and airfare, or what he does for a job remains a scientific mystery. So, whether casting a blank stare upon the immediate horizon, posing with a different turtle dove every other week, or flittering about the world as if it was your backyard, the follies of fowl selfie-takers are quite dynamic. What is the Pigeon looking at? Who is the Darling Dove going to be with tomorrow? Where in the world is the Hummingbird selfie-taker? The answer to these questions? The world may never know — that is until they post more selfies and we see exactly what, who, and where. And it’s that specific sense that comes from brainpower and vision in tandem that separates us from the animals Q.
June 2018 |
Issue 280 | Qsaltlake.com
VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 29
young, old, gay, straight, bi, trans, married, partnered, single, divorced, looking, sinner, saint, s e e k e r, doubter, believer, agnostic, spiritual but not religious, native, immigrant, citizen, alien, got-it-all-together, life-long screw up, black, brown, white, pink, pacifist, militarist, addicted, convicted, conflicted, recovering, discovering, life-long member, just walked in the door, strong, weak, scared, confident, parent, child, male, female, not sure, loner, cool-kid, geek, tree hugger, jock, rich, poor, in the middle, republican, democrat, green party, tea party, young, old, gay, straight, bi, trans, married, partnered, single, divorced, looking, sinner, saint, seeker, doubter, believer, agnostic, spiritual but not religious, native, immigrant, citizen, alien, got-it-all-together, life-long screw up, black, brown, white, pink, pacifist, militarist, addicted, convicted, conflicted, recovering, discovering, life-long member, just walked in the door, strong, weak, scared, confident, parent, child, male, female, not sure, loner, cool-kid, geek, tree hugger, jock, rich, poor, in the middle, republican, democrat, green party, tea party, young, old, gay, straight, bi, trans, married, partnered, single, divorced, looking, sinner, saint, seeker, doubter, believer, agnostic, spiritual but not religious, native, immigrant, citizen, alien, got-it-together, falling apart. not sure
Jesus didn’t turn people away
Neither do we.
First Baptist Church Not what you expect, but maybe what you are looking for.
www.firstbaptist-slc.org 800 S. and 1300 E.
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Qsaltlake.com |
Issue 280 |
June 2018
allies in business
Mark Miller Subaru wins national ‘Love Promise’ award in part for LGBT support BY MICHAEL AARON
Mark Miller Subaru calls itself “Salt Lake City’s LGBTQ-Friendly Subaru Retailer,” says the director of marketing Mike Aguilar. And now they have won a top award from Subaru corporate in part because of their efforts to support our community. Aguilar was the president of the board of the Utah Pride Center when hired by Mark Miller Subaru. He helped create a campaign, along with Kim Turner, titled “We See You We Love You” with financial help from the dealership. The wristband campaign went global. “The wristbands were meant to invite a conversation. So we asked people that when they wear the bracelet, to have that conversation — to open up a dialogue with someone who might not understand the struggles of an LGBTQ person,” Aguilar explained. MMS has also been a major sponsor of the Utah Pride Festival, in fact being one of the longest running locally owned sponsors of the festival. They’ve also donated to the Utah Pride Center itself, the Utah AIDS Foundation, and Volunteers of America in support of LGBT homeless youth. This year Subaru of America recognized Mark Miller Subaru as its 2018 Love Promise Retailer of the Year, an honor awarded to one dealership each year and is part of its “Love. It’s what makes a Subaru, a Subaru” campaign. Subaru also noted that MMS helped Volunteers of America provide 9,475 overnight stays and 56,940 meals for homeless youth in 2017 alone, as well as helped rescue 125,000 homeless animals from the Navajo Reservation in partnership with Nuzzles & Co. “We want to make sure that the homeless youth are taken care of,” said Jeff Miller, general manager of MMS. “There’s a lot bigger focus on that in the LGBT population. It’s many, many kids kicked out of their homes. And what they do for these kids is, they save their lives.” “Nearly 40 percent of homeless youth who live on Utah’s streets are LGBTQ, according to the VOA,” Aguilar said.
“Shunned from their families and literally kicked out of their homes because of their sexuality. And statistically, LGBTQ gay youth more likely face sexual assault on their first night of homelessness. Some resort to prostitution in exchange for shelter, warmth, and food. They are engaging in unsafe sexual acts some-
times just for food to survive. And most alarming to me, 58 percent of these kids attempted suicide at least once, and over a quarter of them tried a minimum of three times.” “So many kids are disowned … from their family, from their communities, from support systems that should have been there for them,” Aguilar said in a Subaru-produced video on the award. “I could have been one of the youth who lived at the VOA — I could have been.” When Aguilar talked with Jeff and Mark Miller about these numbers, it startled them, Aguilar said. So they selected to partner with the VOA. “We are helping save homeless LGBTQ kids every day,” Aguilar said. “This is why we do what we do.” The Millers believe strongly in Subaru’s
“Love Promise” campaign, Aguilar said. “The Love Promise means being more than a car company. It’s Mark Miller Subaru’s vision to show love and respect to all people at every interaction with Subaru. Our dedication is making the world a better place,” Aguilar explained. Former Utah Pride Festival sponsorship manager Monica Owen said that MMS was
a life-changer for Utah’s LGBT community. “They have sponsored and supported many of our events, helping us to raise awareness for our organization and the unique issues within the LGBTQ community,” she said. “Their commitment ‘to be a positive force in something bigger’ is making a significant impact in our LGBTQ community. Their passion for giving is making a huge difference in ALL communities.” “Being able to help like that…” owner Mark Miller said in the video as he became overcome with emotion, “… pretty good.” “You have a responsibility to do good,” said Jeff Miller. “You have a responsibility to take care of the planet and take care of people.” Q markmillersubaru.com
June 2018 |
Issue 280 | Qsaltlake.com
ALLIES IN BUSINESS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 31
allies in business
Coffee Garden turns 25 BY MICHAEL AARON
Alan Hebertson losing his job in 1992 may have been the best thing that happened to him, and a great thing to happen to the East Liberty Park neighborhood and, indeed, Salt Lake’s LGBT community. He and his husband Dieter Sellmair decided to go into business for themselves and Coffee Garden was born on the northwest corner of 9th and 9th in May 1993. The neighborhood was a hippie haven from the late 60s when Cosmic Aeroplane opened its music and head shop there. Nature’s Way Kite and Sandwich Shop was still running when Coffee Garden opened, a final holdout from the days of blacklight posters and sprout sandwiches. The Tower Theatre, of course, was there as well. At the time, you could get a bottomless cup of coffee for a quarter at the Nordstrom Cafe,
but that was about to change because of some coffeehouses in Seattle. Hebertson and Sellmair drove to Seattle and saw the burgeoning businesses and knew they were going to sweep the nation. They took advantage of the fact that Starbucks didn’t see good-ol’ Mormon Salt Lake City as a viable market. In fact, the couple approached Starbucks about opening a location in Salt Lake but were laughed out of the offices. They did, however, say they could sell their coffee. They sold Seattle’s Best coffee in a warm, cozy atmosphere that included a corner for Ray King’s Twigs Flower Company. The vibe was casual and relaxed. You never feared being kicked out for wanting only to use the restroom — a feeling that still exists today. As Starbucks locations spread across the country, they finally saw Salt Lake
City as a viable market. They approached Coffee Garden in 1996 to buy them out. The couple declined, and Starbucks opened kitty-corner to them, but eventually closed when corporate turned the focus on locations with drive-thru windows. In 2003, when Starbucks acquired Seattle’s Best, the couple decided on Caffe Ibis from Logan, which they continue to sell. Having a long, close relationship with Caffe Ibis, they loved the idea of using coffee that was sustainably and organically grown and uses fair trade practices. In 2006, Hebertson and Sellmair moved the coffee shop across the street to its current
location. Cahoots, a few doors west of Coffee Garden, moved into the other half of the building at the same time. They also opened a location on Main Street downtown. The clientele followed the coffee shop, Hebertson says, because of his employees, whom he loves like family. Many people come for a specific barista to make their favorite coffee. Hebertson also says that the neighborhood — a walkable, tight-knit oasis — has contributed to Coffee Garden’s success. Others might say, however, that Coffee Garden has contributed to the walkable tight-knit oasis of a neighborhood. Q
Congratulations to the people of Mark Miller Subaru, 2018 Subaru Love Promise Retailer of the Year. The Mark Miller Subaru family lives by the motto “Leave a Mark.” And in Salt Lake City, there are not many places where they have not. Committed to Their Customers It starts in their store, where customer after customer raves about being treated far better than they would have ever expected From the concierge delivery program that helps drivers better understand their new vehicles to a full-service café for waiting customers, the staff at Mark Miller Subaru makes the experience comfortable and memorable. As recipients of the Subaru Love Promise Customer Commitment Award from 2012 through 2018 and the 2016 Utah Ethical Leadership Most Ethical Business Award, their commitment is indisputable. Committed to Their Community It is no surprise for them that doing the right thing goes beyond running a car business. Whether helping homeless teens find a safe place to sleep and have a meal, or rescuing stray animals, the Miller family’s community commitment is unwavering. Overall, they have donated 9,475 overnight stays for homeless youth through Volunteers of America. And in partnership with Nuzzles & Co., they have helped save 125,000 homeless animals roaming the nearby Navajo Reservation. In recognition of excellence in customer experience and extraordinary commitment to their community, along with $7.4 million in charitable donations over the past seven years, it is our honor to name Mark Miller Subaru the 2018 Subaru Love Promise Retailer of the Year. Love. It’s what makes a Subaru, a Subaru.
A very heartfelt congratulations to Mark Miller Subaru, the 2018 Subaru Love Promise Retailer of the Year.
Find out more about the Subaru Love Promise at subaru.com/love-promise.
JUNE 2018 | ISSUE 280 | QSALTLAKE.COM
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LET IT FLY. Delta is proud to serve you for Utah Pride and beyond, no matter who you love.
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Friends, On behalf of everyo ne in Salt Pride 201 Lake City 8! ,I
want to e xtend a w arm welc The Capit ome to all al City is those cele once again Pride, wh brating U PROUD ich grows tah to bigger an host this ing suppo d brighter week of c rt for equ ulture, co each year, ity and div ura has becom ersity in th e a symbo ge, and commitme is State a After a tw nt. Utah l n d of our co a o-year ren round the mmunity ovation, a country. Pride Fest ’s unwave ll of us w ival back rith Salt L to ALL o Washingto ake f Washing n Square ton Square City are especiall Park has who foun y excited P been whe d refuge o to welcom re our com ark. Since the beg n this spo at festiva e the Uta inning of munity ha t, to welc ls like Pri h o ur State’s s o c m de—this ome toge ing the w history, is the pla th o e rl r— d in fr o 2 c m 0 e 0 fo th 2 , r e to celebra family an This year ting arts a earliest pioneers d fun! we are als nd culture o celebra than 25 y ti each year n ears, the C g the ope ning of th enter has to come. e new Uta been a pla I want to h c extend m dream a re y persona e of healing and ho Pride Center in Sa ality, part lt La l p th e , a traditio a ic n k groundwo ularly outs to all th n which w ke City. For more rk for a n ose in the going Ex ill conti ew future ecutive D c o m munity w irector Ca for the U ho helped nue for years tah Pride ro l G So, let the n mak a d e, whose Center. party beg tireless eff e this in. My w you throu orts laid th ife ghout the e week as w Betty and I, along home. with our e celebrate tw o all that is unique an sons, look forward d beautifu to seeing Please en l in the pla many of joy the tim c e we are lu e out there. with your cky to ca friends, fa ll milies, an d visitors in Salt La From my ke City. A family to nd of cou yours, an rse, stay sa d on beha fe lf of every Happy Pri o n e in Salt La de! ke City:
Jackie Bis kupski Mayor
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QSALTLAKE.COM | ISSUE 280 | JUNE 2018
Pride Interfaith
Kick off this year’s Pride Festival with the annual Pride Interfaith worship service. Many faiths and traditions come together for this service and this is the first time the event is hosted at a Lutheran church.
7pm at Zion Lutheran, 1070 Foothill Dr / Free,
FRIDAYJUNE1 Pride Spectacular
The PRIDE SPECTACULAR will help ring in the 2018 Utah Pride Festival as we celebrate the past, present, and future of our beautifully diverse community, and recognize the recipients of the 2017 Dr. Kristen Ries Community Service Award, Pete Suazo Political Action Award, Breaking Barriers Award, and Lifetime Achievement Award. 6pm at Union Event Center / $110 235 N 500 West
Youth Pride Dance The second annual Youth Pride Dance will once again be held on the Pride Festival Grounds — a dance for all LGBT-friendly youth, hosted by RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 7pm at the Pride Festival Grounds — Washington Square and Library Plaza (Enter at 300 E 500 S) Tickets available at the door $5
KIMORA BLAC teeters between two divergent personalities: “The Boujee Barbie” and “The Kim K of Drag.” The two are so opposite from one another it’s like a split personality — the two faces of Eve, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. “The Boujee Barbie” is always colorful, bubbly and ebullient; she sparkles like crystal. Dressed in sexy, seductive catsuits layered in jewels, diamonds, and gold, a few iconic features of “The Boujee Barbie” are gems, sexy knee-high boots, big boobs, and of course, a lot of ass. “The Boujee Barbie” is the vixen of drag! She loves high-energy songs, sexy lip-sync lyrics, and loves to party with everyone. On the other side of her psyche lurks “The Kim K of Drag”. She’s muted, chic, indifferent...an unflappable, ohso-cool, and unbothered. She loves wearing shades of nude, hues of military and olive greens mixed with staples, pieces of greys blacks and whites. Iconic features of “The Kim K of Drag” are: expensive designer stilettos, Celine sunglasses, a diamond choker, and an over-sized jacket draped over her shoulders; she makes being incognito sexy and always in style.
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SATURDAYJUNE 2
OUTdoors & Proud 5K
8–11am, Jordan Park & Peace Gardens 1060 S. 900 West. Yoga in the Peace Gardens, fitness challenges, volleyball in the park and other healthy lifestyle activities. 5K $40 online registration closes May 26. Onsite registration $45 at 8. Race at 9.
Pride March & Rally
Gathering at the south stairs of the Utah State Capitol Building, we’ll rally, then march to Pride Festival Grounds. Come out and celebrate, agitate, and stand united! 6pm at he Utah State Capitol / Free. Rally Begins 6:45pm March steps off and heads down State Street to South Temple, east to 200 East, then outh to the Festival Grounds.
PRIDE FESTIVAL
Gates are open, vendors are eager to meet you, food is cooking, and the entertainment is bangin!
1–11pm at the Festival Grounds $8 online at utahpridecenter.org/festival and $10 at the gates
Main Stage
Based in Salt Lake, TOTEM CITY began with high school friends Luke Leetham (vocals, synths) and Nick Nord (guitar, production). After graduation, Luke met Aaron Jeffers (drums) while attending a local community college and invited him into the band. Later that year, Luke invited Ascari Lucero (bass) from another project to join the band, thus completing the lineup. Totem City blends genre elements of electronic, rock, and indie pop for a spicy original sound. 20-year-old DALLAS WAYDE brings you a familiar Top-40 sound at the crossroads of upbeat melodies and emotional lyricism. His first full-length studio album “So Young and So Damaged” landed early his year, and it brought in about 50k digital streams in its first month — a tipping point for Dallas and his team, “The Broken Hearts Club.”
Pride Speakers and Films
Free & Open to the Public at the Salt Lake City Main Library, 2–9 p.m. Join Utah Pride for a series of speakers, panels, workshops, and films on topics related to LGBTQ+ life. Everything from Drag Workshops to Queer Sex Ed to the film Toderick Hall: Behind the Curtain.
In song or as a speaker, you can find SHEA FREEDOM advocating for foster youth, human rights, and environmental issues. Born in Los Angeles Freedom was raised in California’s foster care system where he was subject to 28 different placements. Like 68 percent of foster youth, Freedom emancipated into homelessness. No doubt the early instability would prepare him for the fast-paced life on the road. He has found his home on stages across the nation and has traveled solo all over the U.S. via thumb and motorcycle. Freedom was awarded the 2016 Rising Star Award by Black Trans Men Inc
Kiran, who performs as MADAME GANDHI, is an electronic music artist and activist based in Los Angeles. She studied mathematics at Georgetown University and worked as the first ever data analyst at Interscope Records before going on to receive her MBA from Harvard. Having gained recognition as the former drummer for artist M.I.A., Madame Gandhi now produces music that elevates and celebrates the female voice. In 2016, she released her first EP Voices and in 2017, she toured as the opening act for Ani DiFranco. She is currently working on her debut full-length album.
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400 S
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EXIT
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THE AGENDA
PRIDE MARCH ROUTE
FRIDAY
SUNDAY
YOUTH PRIDE DANCE MAIN STAGE 8 pm Kimora Blac
FESTIVAL OPENS 11 am Washington Square
DJ/SPOKEN WORD STAGE 1:10 pm Peculiar Journal 5 pm DJ Schwanny 9 pm Pulse Regime
DJ/SPOKEN WORD STAGE Noon When She Speaks I Hear the Revolution 3:15 pm Skittish and Bus 5:15 pm DJ Legs aka Shireen for Congress FESTIVAL CLOSES 7 pm Washington Square
UTAH PRIDE PARADE MAP
100 S
400 EAST
REDROCK STAGE 1:10 pm Mr. Bonetangles and the Tuna Can Ramblers 3:20 pm Toby 4:25 pm Early Successional 5:35 pm Opaline 6:15 pm Fists in the Wind 6:55 pm The Secret of Mana 8:05 pm Shecock & The Rock Princess 9:10 pm Utah Vaudeville and Burlesque Collective 10:10 pm Debi Graham Band
REDROCK STAGE Noon Maka MaMas 1:10 pm Dee-Dee Darby-Duffin 2:20 pm Somebody, Anybody 3:30 pm Sister Wives 4:40 pm Ginger and The Gents 5:40 pm Phobia The Greatest
300 EAST
MAIN STAGE 1:05 pm Music and Art Collective 3 pm The Performer Studio 5:10 pm Totem City 6:20 pm Dallas Wayde 7:30 pm Madame Gandhi 8:30 pm Shea Freedom 9:10 pm Underground Pop
200 EAST
FESTIVAL OPENS 1 pm Washington Square
STATE STREET
PRIDE MARCH & RALLY 6 pm Utah State Capitol
MAIN STREET
OUTDOORS & PROUD 5K 8-11 am Jordan Park & Peace Gardens 1060 S. 900 West
MAIN STAGE 12:15 pm Salt Lake Acting Company 12:45 pm SONNEI 1:25 pm Salt Lake Men’s Choir 2 pm Cheer Salt Lake 2:35 pm Talia Keys and The Love 3:45 pm Samba Fogo 5 pm Jason Maek & Zaena
WEST TEMPLE
SATURDAY
UTAH PRIDE PARADE 10 am Second South from West Temple to 4th East
200 WEST
PRIDE SPECTACULAR 6 pm Union Event Ctr 235 N 500 W
PRIDE 5K ROUTE
200 S
LEGEND TICKET GATES
EXIT GATES
FOOD
DRINKS
CENTER ZONE
PORT-OPOTTIES
KIDS ZONE
INTERACTIVE ZONE
MAIN STAGE
RED ROCK STAGE
MEMBER GARDEN
PUBLIC GARDEN
FIRST AID
FREE WATER
VOLUNTEER GATE
VENDOR OFFICE
DANCE STAGE
KARAOKE STAGE
VIP LOUNGE
ATM
INFO KIOSK
PRIDE STORE
LOADING ZONE
BIKE VALET
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Pride Parade
The Pride Parade begins in the same location as last year, West Temple and Second South, heading east on Second South to Fourth East.
10am / Free, Second South downtown
Pride Festival Opens
Gates are open, vendors are eager to meet you, food is cooking, and let the entertainment begin!
11am–7pm at the Festival Grounds $8 at UtahPrideCenter.org/festival/ or $10 at the gates SONNEI combines poetic lyrics and silky-smooth vocals with infectious melodies to create a fresh sound reflective of their identity. With a stage show inspired by pop icons, Sonnei brings choreography and a vibrant androgynous aesthetic to highlight the music, celebrating gender non-conformity and queer pride with every performance.
TALIA KEYS is a genre-crossing, multi-instrumental “musical powerhouse” with her brand of soul-funkrock ‘n’ roll, unique vocal stylings, and a storytelling flow. As a Salt Lake City native, she keeps herself busy playing regionally since 2010, Europe in 2011, and touring nationally for the past four years with her solo project Gemini Mind. A full electric solo live looping show that captivates and captures the hearts of good people everywhere. TK & The Love have been playing shows together for the last two years. From music festivals to music venues, original music to fullblown tribute shows, TK & The Love are high energy, engaging and unique. JASON MAEK & ZAENA have become one of the fastest
rising American electronic music duos. Their signature sound mixes indie, dance, and pop into a chart-topping sound that spawned hits like “Birthday” and “Get Up”. Bending the boundaries of electronic, their productions delicately blend a unique skill set of harmonic vocals and hard-hitting rap lyrics. Their live shows are becoming the most sought after in electronic music. Their wild antics, hilarious personalities, and addicting productions have fans interacting with them nonstop and running to see them live every chance they get. The duo is preparing for the release of their sophomore album titled Freshman which already has support from BBC Radio.
JUNE 2018 | ISSUE 280 | QSALTLAKE.COM
UTAH PRIDE GUIDE 2018 PULL-OUT SECTION | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 43 Salt Lake City’s PHOBIA THE GREATEST, an upand-coming artist, is bringing a whole new sound to the music industry, with her 2017 single, “$auce God” and 2018 single, “Blue Band$.” The Greatest has much more to offer. Find her on all social media accounts to stay updated with new releases.
CHEER SALT LAKE is an adult cheerleading group of all ages, body types, races, religions, genders and sexual orientations who serve and raise money for people with lifethreatening conditions. Born in the “Charm City” of Baltimore, DEE-DEE DARBY-DUFFIN has been delighting audiences with her mixture of jazz standards, R&B, soul, and funk for a quarter of a century. While making sweet sounds she also discovered the acting bug and has performed in countless regional theater productions and discovered her love of jazz while performing to sold-out shows in the lead role in Lady Day At Emerson’s Bar & Grill for Pygmalion Theatre. Folks have been lining up to see her ever since.
SALT LAKE MEN’S CHOIR is “Utah’s Other Choir” — one of the state’s oldest membersupported arts organizations. Started by 13 men in 1983, the choir has a history of giving a variety of choral music to Utah. Now 90 members strong, under the Artistic Direction of Dennis McCracken, accompanied by Aaron Flood, the choir produces two to three top quality concerts per year.
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MORE ENTERTAINERS The DEBI GRAHAM BAND consists of three extremely talented, highly energetic musicians seasoned in their field, each with a unique style, combined to make an illuminating collective. They have opened Fiona Apple, Lucinda Williams, Sara Bettens (of K’s Choice), Sierra Swan, Mozella, Kinky, The Samples and many more. The trio has performed at the Sundance Film Festival. Throughout their years of touring the Northwest, West Coast, and Southwest regions, they have managed to create an extensive, rapidly growing fan base with cult-following loyalties. DJ LEGS AKA SHIREEN FOR CONGRESS Shireen Ghorbani is running for the United States House of Representatives in Utah’s 2nd District and she knows how to deliver what’s best for people — whether that is shaking it all on the dance floor or accessing affordable healthcare.
MANA is an Iranian American MC. She was born in the U.S., raised in Iran, and traveled throughout the world. She raps in English and in Farsi. Her music is upbeat, cut-throat, and melodic. Through her passion, she also started Lipstick Revolt, a women empowerment organization that highlights and promotes women. Her music is inspiring people to reach their goals and to keep a positive attitude. Mana’s music talks about issues that the media ignores and gives voice to those who aren’t but need to be heard. Her style is unique and refreshing in a period where passion is rare. Mana is guaranteed to hit the heart.
FISTS IN THE WIND is a Salt Lake Citybased queer punk screaming DIY sadness party. Matttheratt & PrttyxPrtty play lyrical ukulele rants about salt, social scenes, truck drivers, and friendship. No frills, just gritty rock ‘n’ roll, with a whole lot of soul to blow your hair back, hit you in the gut, and pluck on your heartstrings. GINGER AND THE GENTS puts a contemporary spin on the classic story we know as rock ‘n’ roll. It’s a little salty and a little sweet, but it ain’t no appetizer. It’s the main course, crafted to put meat on your bones. We hope you’re hungry. It’s supper time. MAKA MAMAS are a magical musical duo with strong, and tangible acoustic rhythms; and dynamic vocals that are spiritually inspired and heartcentered. Together their music is a high vibrational, organic, earthy, tribal, kirtan medicine for the soul!
of puppetry the show weirds you out and makes you dance. MUSIC ART COLLECTIVE is committed to fostering an environment of support, teamwork, and friendship, where kids can feel safe to find their voice. Through music, art, mindfulness and community involvement they believe confidence and tools to successfully navigate life can be learned. OPALINE is an artist based in Salt Lake City. Their music and lyrics resemble the myriad of colors and luminescence of an opal. The focus of the songwriting is confessional poetry interwoven with sonic texture and presented in various genrebending structures. PECULIAR JOURNAL is a queer literary journal showcasing prose, poetry, art, and photography. With roots in the Mormon stronghold of Provo, peculiar began as a way to recognize the creative talents of the often-overlooked queer community within Utah’s unique culture. They have published five issues since 2015, and several of those talented wordsmiths will read poetry during the Festival.
DJ SCHWANNY has been playing music since he was a preteen and made the switch from the bass in various pop-punk and metal bands to honing his craft as a DJ in 2013. He aims to combine elements from multiple genres to provide mixes that are bass heavy and make you want to dance. With a special place in his heart for remixes don’t be surprised to hear some oldies with a new twist to them. He brings a stage presence you seldom see with EDM. The passion he brings and the involvement he shares with the crowd makes his sets one of a kind. Tamarra Evans-Sluga, Sabra Schlyter, and Hillary McDaniel make up folk music trio EARLY SUCCESSIONAL. They each have a unique take on folk music, that when put together becomes a distinctive blend of strings, keys, harmonies, and catchy beats. Each stays true to folk form with story-telling lyrics with a rustic edge. They embrace they’re queerness and never shy away from expressing their true selves on stage and in song.
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MEL SOUL AND THE MESSENGER Mel Soul is a local singer and songwriter from Orem. In 2009, she had the great opportunity of singing with the Provo High School Chamber Singers for an exclusive concert at Carnegie Hall in New York City. Then, 2012 was when her love of songwriting began. Since then she has worked with songwriter professionals such as Rich Parkinson, Shane Adams, Johnny London and most recently, Natasha Bedingfield. Her goal as a songwriter and performer is to inspire her fans to love themselves, to love everyone else. Everett Lavell Spencer, The Messenger, has been in the entertainment business for 25 years. He is a talented professional musician. This past year his performances included The Caribbean Christmas Concert for Audio West in Orem, Kamas Valley Christmas Concert Christmas, and a live television performance with featured artist Marj Desius. Performing a bizarre Vaudevillian variety act, MR. BONETANGLES AND THE TUNA CAN RAMBLERS are a ragtag group of swingin’, washboard-scratchin’, bass-thumpin’, puppet-stringpullin’, music-playin’ drifters who got together in Salt Lake City with the same vision of making folks dance along with foot-tapping marionettes. Combining an old-time sound with the ancient art
SALT LAKE ACTING COMPANY is celebrating Utah’s wildest summer-long party with the 40th Anniversary of Saturday’s Voyeur. Pack a picnic and enjoy this irreverent romp through 40 years of Utah’s politics and culture. Running June 27–Sept. 2. Shows are like wine, some turn to vinegar but Voyeur gets better with age! Drawing on rich cultural traditions and mythology, SAMBA FOGO offers high-energy drumming and dance programs that bring the joy, celebration, and history of Brazilian Samba to life on stage and in the classroom. Lead by Artistic Director Lorin Hansen and Musical Director Mason Aeschbacher, Samba Fogo is a versatile company that performs and teaches in a multitude of settings, from outdoor arts festivals to proscenium theaters, schools, summer camps, clubs and community events. Samba Fogo’s highenergy performances and educational programs offer the local community a unique opportunity to experience a deep-rooted culture, infectious enthusiasm, and the celebratory spirit that makes Brazil famous. SHECOCK & THE ROCK PRINCESS Shecock is a power trio filling the gaps of rock, pop, punk, and grunge, breaking boundaries of gender and genre. Exhibiting powerful messages of being transgender in the modern world, The Rock Princess’ deep raspy vocals, unapologetic lyrics, and wailing guitar will pierce your mind and soul. Backed by hard-hitting drums and groove-heavy basslines, Shecock is sure to satisfy but leave you with the desire for more. More Shecock!
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The SISTER WIVES band are a rocking assortment of blues musicians, each with a diverse musical background. The Wives’ started in January 2003 playing numerous regional festivals, clubs, live television, and private shows in Utah, Idaho, Washington, Oregon, California, and Nevada. The band was named one of the Best New Bands of the Year in the SLAMMY’s. Two of their favorite gigs are The Pride Festival and the Women’s Redrock Musical Festival. Join them on “tourcation” this summer over the 4th of July in the San Juan Islands. We’re a married Salt Lake City DJ and producer duo, SKITTISH & BUS! We play all kinds of events, clubs, and festivals, but being part of SLC Pride is extra special. The passion, empowerment, and expression in our community is
UTAH PRIDE GUIDE 2018 PULL-OUT SECTION | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 45 something amazing to belong to. We love sharing our energetic passion for dance music. While we’ll admit that DJ-ing is super fun, what drives us is our addiction to a good, positive dance floor. Thinking about how great SLC Pride is at dancing and expression, makes us go weak in the knees. Expect dancy summertime vibes, remixes of those songs you sing in the shower, and fun takes on the classics. Connect with us wherever you’re social @ skittishandbus.
live performance truly is a treat. Toby is passionate, raw, and powerful, with a mix of soul, blues, folk, rock and a splash of gypsy hick.
From the heart of the promised land, SOMEBODY/ANYBODY has been blasting SLC with their high-energy, good vibes since 2015. The five-piece indie rock crew creates an explosion of retro riffs, rooted in a modern rock style that sounds fresh and yet makes you feel like you’ve been listening to their music your whole life. Reaching across genres, Somebody/Anybody crafts poetic joy that can be loved by pals of all ages. Not only is their music magically delicious, but the message is so hopeful and positive.
A variety of artists, performers, dancers, musicians, and lovers of one-of-a-kind acts comprise the UTAH VAUDEVILLE AND BURLESQUE COLLECTIVE. Formed by Utah Burlesque community member, their hope is establishing an open-door hiring process for often underrecognized and underserved performers. The UVBC joined forces with the Art Factory for open rehearsal space every Tuesday. In addition, they work closely with numerous venues and other art collectives to serve all Utah variety performers.
West Australian Blues/roots/indie artist TOBY is so much more than your average singer-songwriter. She powers through each live performance with her lyrical talent and fierce, dynamic vocals. Audiences revel in the genuine and honesty of both her songwriting and performance. Her compelling vocals and the way she captures audiences can’t be explained but just needs to be heard and seen. Her
WHEN SHE SPEAKS I HEAR THE REVOLUTION is a monthly open mic that highlights and celebrates the voices of women, queer, transgender, and PoC creators. The open mic includes poetry, prose, improv, music, and more. When She Speaks is open to creatives of all types. We believe that the most important thing we can do is share and elevate our voices.
UNDERGROUND POP is a collaboration based project, with the main intention to bring underground artistry onto a mainstream platform. With the use of performance art, pop music, clothing, visuals, etc., Underground Pop is here for you, inspired to make you feel one thing — pure emotion.
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SPONSORS
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ANNUAL EVENTS The Gina Bachauer International Piano Foundation presents the XVII Gina Bachauer International Artists Piano Competition, June 11–23. The event marks 42 years of Bachauer competitions inviting the world’s most elite pianists to Utah to compete for cash, prizes, and fame. Chosen from 216 applicants through a universal screening process, 36 international pianists, ages 19–32, compete for more than $105,000 in prizes. Well, that’s random, like Melania’s daily stipend. Since there are no requirements of repertory, competitors can display their personal artistry in the music of their choice.
Tony’s 11 Gay Agenda DANCE
MONDAY — GINA BACHAUER INTERNATIONAL ARTISTS PIANO COMPETITION Abravanel Hall, 123 W. South Temple,
times vary, through June 23. Tickets vary per week, competition passes, $150, arttix.org
BY TONY HOBDAY
SB Dance presents “Something Really Big”, a new series that will pop up in different mediums over the next few years. This June, “Part II: Ergo Decipiatur”, is a theater production — and second episode (look for the upcoming online release of “Part I: Same Old”). “Ergo Decipiatur” is best described as an 11-person play with dance and song. It weaves a Weimar-era detective, cutthroat club owner, hard-luck yoga teacher, inspirational speaker, boutique chef, Gestapo agent, and other characters into a time-traveling tapestry of stories about people looking for something really big. The show is performed street-art-style, with live music by MiNX.
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SATURDAY — SOMETHING REALLY BIG: PART 2 Black Box Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, 8 p.m., through June 19. Tickets $20, arttix.org
CONCERTS The Flaming Lips are an award-winning ‘80s band that hasn’t burned out like Jesse’s playlist at Try-Angles. Just sayin’! So, Kesha and Macklemore are more than you can fry on a hibachi, but they are sexy, sweet, and filling at every moment. That’s what they want, and they know how to hook their fins ... oops, fans! Metronomy, like gingerbread cookies, perform sights unseen with the so-hoped gay Cold War Kids; their hostility and passion comes out in bunk beds ... again, oops, bunkers! Singer-actress Janelle Monae came out late April as pansexual. And damn good for her. She told Rolling Stone: “Being a queer black woman in America — someone who has been in relationships with both men and women — I consider myself to be a free-ass motherfucker.”
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SATURDAY — JANELLE MONAE The Complex, 536 W. 100 South, 6:30 p.m. Tickets $38.50 adv/$50 day-of, smithstix.com
MOVIES Jewel’s Catch One documents the oldest Black-owned disco in America and establishes the legacy of businesswoman, activist, and healer, Jewel Thais-Williams, who stood up against hate and discrimination for 42 years. The story of Jewel and “The Catch” celebrates four decades of music, fashion, celebrity, and activism that helped change the course of our country by breaking down racial, social, and cultural barriers. One of the original safe spaces for both the LGBT and Black communities, The Catch, the “unofficial Studio 54 of the West Coast”, also served as a refuge for many during the AIDS crisis. Hearts Beat Loud is a remarkably fresh multi-racial film where the lesbian lead character (played by out actress Kiersey Clemons) is not struggling with her sexuality, her love relationship, or her acceptance of her father (Nick Offerman) and friends.
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FRIDAY — JEWEL’S CATCH ONE Tower Theatre, 876 E. 900 South, times vary. Tickets $6.75–9.25, saltlakefilmsociety.org FRIDAY — HEARTS BEAT LOUD Broadway Centre Cinemas, 111 E. 300 South, times vary. Tickets $6.75–9.25, saltlakefilmsociety.org
SPECIAL ENGAGEMENTS Planned Parenthood Action Council presents Liberty Laughs and Libations with Tig Notaro. This one-night performance featuring the Emmy- and Grammy-nominated comedian Tig Notaro, along with special musical guests, benefits Planned Parenthood’s political work in Utah. The pre-show reception includes a live performance from local crowd favorite Pixie and the Party grass boys while you enjoy a signature cocktail, drinks, and snacks. Is party grass on the ballot for legalization?
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THURSDAY — LIBERTY, LAUGHS, AND LIBATIONS WITH TIG NOTARO Delta Performance Hall, Eccles Theater, 131 S. Main St., 8 p.m. Tickets $50 or $75 to include the reception at 6:30 p.m., arttix.org
THEATRE
& AE
THURSDAY — THE FLAMING LIPS Ogden Amphitheater, 343 E. 25th St., Ogden, 5 p.m. Tickets $10, 24tix.com
SATURDAY — THE ADVENTURES OF KESHA AND MACKLEMORE USANA Amphitheatre, 5150 Upper Ridge Rd., WVC, 7 p.m. Tickets $30.50–120, smithstix.com THURSDAY — METRONOMY AND COLD WAR KIDS Ogden Amphitheater, 343 E. 25th St., Ogden, 5 p.m. Tickets $10, 24tix.com
In Jean-Paul Sartre’s classic black comedy, No Exit, three strangers are brought to a room in hell where they will spend eternity together. While they struggle at first to admit to themselves and each other the reason for their damnation, they eventually learn to be honest and come to hope for some salvation. But their hopes are dashed when they realize, “hell is other people.” It is the first production from Sisyphus Theatre Company, patreon.com/ sisyphustheatre.
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THURSDAY — NO EXIT Studio Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, 7:30 p.m., through Saturday. Tickets $10, arttix.org
UPCOMING EVENTS
July 20–22, DAMN THESE HEELS FILM FESTIVAL, utahfilmcenter.org July 28, LOVELOUD FESTIVAL, smithstix.com Aug. 9, JACK WHITE, ticketfly.com Sep. 21, CULTURE CLUB AND THE B-52’S, maverikcenter.com Sep. 22, BECK, smithstix.com
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The 15th Damn These Heels screens in July The longest-running LGBTQ Film Festival in the Mountain West will return to the screens at the Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center July 20–22. Organizers say the event provides a “safe, supportive environment that celebrates our community’s diversity by sharing LGBTQ history, culture, ideas, struggles, and triumphs through film.” DTH presents award-winning independent, documentary, and foreign films from around the world. The full line-up will be announced in Late May, but we were able to get a sneak peek at some of the films:
QUIET HEROES — OPEN NIGHT FILM
USA / DIRECTOR: JENNY MACKENZIE, CO-DIRECTORS: JARED RUGA, AMANDA STODDARD
Post-film discussion with directors and subjects In Salt Lake City, Utah, the socially conservative religious monoculture complicated the AIDS crisis, where patients in the entire state and intermountain region relied on only one doctor. This is the story of her fight to save a maligned population everyone else seemed willing to just let die.
ALASKA IS A DRAG
DIRECTOR: SHAZ BENNETT (SLC NATIVE) CAST: MARTIN L. WASHINGTON JR., MAYA WASHINGTON, MATT DALLAS
Tough, but diva fabulous, Leo’s dreams of superstardom are hard fought, stuck working in a fish cannery in Alaska. Based on the short film of the same title which played at the 2013 Damn These Heels.
CLOSE-KNIT
JAPAN / DIRECTOR: NAOKO OGIGAMI CAST: RINKA KAKIHARA, TOMA IKUTA, KENTA KIRITANI, MIMURA
After being neglected by her mother, a little girl is taken in by her uncle and his transsexual girlfriend, who create a loving home for her.
AN IDEAL HOME
USA / DIRECTOR: ANDREW FLEMING CAST: STEVE COOGAN, PAUL RUDD, KATE WALSH, ALISON PILL
An extravagant gay couple (played by Coogan and Rudd) get an unexpected surprise when a 10-year-old boy shows up at their front door claiming he is the grandson of one of them.
Special Events 48-HOUR FILM PROJECT “OUT” Just launched LGTBQ version of the popular contest in which teams of filmmakers are assigned a genre, a character, a prop, and a line of dialogue, and have 48 hours to create a short film containing those elements. Films will be made the weekend before the Festival and will screen at Damn These Heels. Tickets are on sale now as well as film packages, including a Film Lovers Pass that includes single admission to Opening Night film and 10 tickets to your choice of films plus priority entrance and discounts on local restaurant fare, transportation, and DTH merchandise. Early Bird Special price is $50. A Film & Party pass adds cocktail receptions and special perks at the opening nigh party. Silver VIP passes are good for two people and Gold VIP are good for four. To see more films that will play and to learn more about the Festival visit utahfilmcenter.org
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Boise Men’s Chorus will join Salt Lake Men’s Choir for a free Pride concert The Boise Men’s Choir heads to Utah to join SLMC in a free Broadway-themed Pride joint concert Saturday, June 2. The following weekend, SLMC travels to Boise to help kick off their Pride Week with a joint concert there. Each choir will sing four or five Broadway songs, and the two choirs will join together on four songs, including “This is Me” from The Greatest Showman. The concert takes place at First Baptist Church, 777 S. 1300 East, beginning at 7:30 p.m. The following weekend, SLMC stops in Twin Falls, Idaho to sing at the Ascension Episcopal Church starting at 2 p.m., on Saturday, June 9. The same joint concert continues Sunday, June 10 at 3 p.m., at the Boise State University Special Events Center. The Salt Lake Men’s Choir last month celebrated their 35th anniversary.
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GINA BACHAUER INTERNATIONAL ARTISTS PIANO COMPETITION 2018 JUNE 10th to the 23rd
ROSE WAGNER PERFORMING ARTS CENTER / ABRAVANEL HALL BACHAUER.COM
LGBT-themed ‘Next Fall’ laying in Provo One of the best-reviewed Off-Broadway plays of 2009 was playwright Geoffrey Nauffts’ comedy-drama Next Fall, about two gay men — one an atheist, one a devout Christian — who fall in love and struggle to reconcile their differences. Now An Other Theater Company stages the Tony-nominated hit about the clash of faith, family, friendship, and gay love. “Next Fall, ultimately, is about Adam and Luke, an atheist and a Christian who meet and fall in love and navigate their differences over a five-year period until a terrible accident happens and their two worlds completely collide,” said Nauffts in a 2010 interview. “In my mind what I was setting out to do was an exploration of faith in this day and age. That said, I love the way that you phrase it: it’s a comedy, a romance, a tragedy. I think that it sneaks up on you, whatever it is. And that was sort of my intention.” When: Fridays & Saturdays through May 26, 7:30 p.m., Provo Towne Centre Mall, 1200 Towne Centre Blvd., Provo Tickets: $15 at the door or www.anothertheatercompany.com/tickets. Q
40 WORLD-CLASS PIANISTS 2 WEEKS OF INTENSE COMPETITION 2 EVENINGS WITH THE UTAH SYMPHONY
THE BACHAUER. WE SET THE STAGE FOR BIG DREAMS. TICKETS at ARTSALTLAKE.ORG or 801.355.ARTS
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The World Swipes Right on
Adam Rippon
America’s favorite out skater on finding his gay power, sex-inspired costumes and his post-Olympics clapback for Tinder ghosters BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI
“Yes, this
is an interview,” a schoolgirl-giggly Adam Rippon deadpans to fellow figure skater Charlie White who, naturally, is curious about the current topic of conversation: sex and harnesses, and how both come together to inspire his uniquely nontraditional collection of on-ice ensembles. Rippon is chatting while putting on his performance makeup in a locker room inside a Rhode Island arena, about to serve a graceful two-song solo during a Stars on Ice stop, featuring his Olympic peers. “(Charlie is) like, ‘I’ve never done an interview like this before,’” Rippon tells me. “He said he’s never been honest and open.” Rippon takes a long, very “Adam Rippon for dramatic effect” pause, the kind you know and love if you’ve been obsessing over every fabulous, filterless turn of phrase our self-proclaimed “glamazon bitch” has turned: “You should try it out!” No kidding: The 28-year-old ice champion leads by example, proving with unapologetic defiance — he fiercely came at the vice president of the United States for his anti-gay rhetoric — and iconic Folsom elegance, like the S&M gear he wore during the Oscars this year, that being yourself can take you places. If you’re Rippon, who’s from Scranton, Pennsylvania, it can take you to Pyeongchang, South Korea, where Rippon set fire to the ice during the 2018 Winter Olympics, becoming the first openly gay U.S. male athlete to win a (bronze) medal in a Winter Olympics. Rippon’s mere existence as a brazenly gay global inspiration with a tongue as sharp as the blades on his skates has been celebrated for his “faggy magic,” as coined by journalist Peter Moskowitz. And at a recent Stars on Ice show in Detroit, Michigan, he elicited the wildest applause, from suburban moms to girl tweens and a squadron of genuinely proud queers. Reese Witherspoon loves him. So does Elmo. And like any good mother, Sally Field tried to set him up with her gay son. My roommate was starstruck even before Rippon rang me, so nervous just knowing Adam Rippon would be calling
that she left our Airbnb apartment. I share this with Rippon, who’s, again, all giggles: “It’s a really high compliment that your roommate needed to leave.” (Later, during our goodbye, he playfully says, “Tell your roommate I said ‘hi.’”) Rippon would make his Dancing with the Stars debut weeks after our call, slaying a vogueing cha-cha to RuPaul’s “Sissy That Walk.” But before he competed against Tonya Harding with partner Jenna Johnson during the ABC dance-off, the skater opened up about how booze kills his wit game and what he tells guys on Tinder who want a second chance with him and inspiring suicidal queer youth, all the while, being his irresistible self. That’s all you can really ask for — and in Rippon’s case, want. I want to give you a phone hug and say thanks for giving this 35-year-old man a new level of realness to aspire to. I’m hugging you back. You stood next to Britney Spears at the GLAAD Media Awards recently for a pic. I heard she liked the way you smelled. Yes, she did. It’s just, like, weird — you’ve seen somebody your whole entire life, and then you walk up to them and you’re like, “Oh, you’re real.” But she was really nice. We just congratulated her on her award and she was like, “You smell really nice,” and I was like, “Thank you so much, ’cause that’s so important to me.” Is it weird that now I want to know how you smell? I smell nice. Like primrose? Yes. And that night was special because gay Olympian Gus Kenworthy kissed you on stage. How exactly would you describe your relationship with Gus at this point? Umm (laughs), so, I mean, we’re just friends, obviously. His boyfriend was backstage laughing at him, and so he was just trying to be funny. Gus is a nut. But you’re so close. And both of you being gay Olympians, it seems you’ve really bonded. Oh, absolutely. We’re just like brothers. I guess brothers who kiss. But
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no, I love him, he’s so nice, and we’re very good friends.
office and he lent it to me. I’m obsessed with Jeremy. He’s amazing.
You seem like the kind of person who likes a few nice things in his dressing room. What is on your "Stars on Ice tour" rider? I try to keep it super simple so I don’t forget a lot of things. So, when I am traveling I literally just have my skates, my costume, and that’s basically it. I try to keep it so super simple or I’m gonna lose all my shit.
Do you get to keep these costumes? I keep my own costumes. Because, like, I bought them, outright. But the Oscars outfit was for the runway — from the carpet back to the office.
Don’t you have people who can remember this stuff for you? An entourage? It’s getting there. Slowly. But I still want to, like, be able to be self-sufficient, you know what I mean? For a while, at least. At least for the rest of the month. I think that’s a lofty goal. You know, dream big. So, “Dancing with the Stars”: Can you even believe that you’re competing against Tonya Harding? (Sighs) Ah, I cannot. What is that like? It’s not a super big deal, but I think she’s got a lot going on, so I’m just gonna let her do her own thing, probably. Probably best. You’ve met? I did meet her. She’s very pleasant. Team Tonya or Team Nancy? Well, I mean, Tonya tried to kill someone, so I’m Team Nancy, probably. Honestly think that’s probably the safe choice to make. I think it’s probably the right choice. What did you think of I, Tonya? I loved it. I thought Margot Robbie [who played Harding] was great. Amazing. Who would you cast as Adam in I, Adam? Well, Margot did so well, so maybe just Margot Robbie is a safe bet. Who inspires your on-ice style? The skating world inspires it a little bit, and then… you’re just gonna know that I’m trashy. I look at like, um, sex stuff and stuff people wear — harnesses and stuff — and the design is quite amazing. I will bring them to my costume designer and we will make them more appropriate for a competition. For a PG audience? Yes. But actually, it’s not for that audience. But I make it for them. That harness you wore to the Oscars in March: Where is it? It’s in [fashion designer] Jeremy Scott’s office. The suit was by Moschino, and so it was from Jeremy’s
Hard to give that up. So many opportunities to wear something like that. I know! Like to a wedding. Or a funeral. Yeah, anything. The grocery store. What’s the biggest difference between 12-year-old Adam Rippon and the Adam Rippon I’m talking to right now? I think the biggest difference is all of the things that I’ve been through. I think now I have a better idea of who I am, and I think I had a lot of self-discovery to go through when I was young. I was just as trash — but now I’m just older. More comfortable with the trash? Yeah, I’m just more comfortable being trashy. Were you a sassy kid? I don’t think I realized how sassy I was till I was at the Olympics and people were like “Ahahaha, you’re so sassy” and then I was “Ahahaha… you think so?” And they’re like, “Oh yeah, you’re, like, SASSY.” And I was like, I just thought I was fresh. Like, “No — you’re sassy.” Oh. OK. Who inspires your sassiness? The person who inspires me to be sassy is my mom. So it’s in the blood. (Laughs) Yeah, it’s definitely in the blood. It’s something I can’t control. You know how you’re born — you sometimes have curly hair or blue eyes, and I have curly hair, but I don’t have blue eyes. But I also have my mom’s sassy attitude. Born this way. Born this way, for sure. Genetics. Your future: What’s off the table? Where do you draw the line? Like, I’m not gonna do porn. That’s drawing the line, I guess. A reality show? I don’t think I would do a reality show — I mean, I’m doing Dancing with the Stars. That’s a reality show. I’m not gonna do, like, Big Brother or anything. Are you getting a lot of offers? Yeah, I’m getting a lot of offers to do stuff. A lot of it’s ghetto. What percentage of these offers are you turning down? I’m talking a little bit to everybody, and honestly my schedule’s so
15 great concerts
20 minutes north of Salt Lake at the beautiful Kenley Amphitheater SAT, JUNE 9
The Five Browns FRI, JUNE 15
Terry Fator WED, JUNE 20
Twisted Broadway
STARRING BLUE JUPITER SAT, JUNE 23 AN EVENING WITH
Jenny Oaks Baker, Lexi Walker, & Nathan Pacheco SAT, JUNE 30
Night Ranger SAT, JULY 7
British Rock Royalty
THE MUSIC OF LED ZEPPELIN, PINK FLOYD, QUEEN, & THE WHO THU, JULY 19
Arrival From Sweden THE MUSIC OF ABBA SAT, JULY 28
Melissa Etheridge SAT, AUG 4
Simply Three TUE, AUG 14
The Secret Sisters SAT, AUG 18
GENTRI
WED, AUG 22
The Lettermen SAT, AUG 25
Jim Messina WED, SEPT 5
Boz Scaggs SAT, SEPT 8
One Night In Memphis TICKETS @ DAVISARTS.ORG FOR MORE INFO call
801-546-8575
KENLEY AMPHITHEATER 403 N WASATCH DR. LAYTON, UT
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crazy right now I don’t even know who. I barely even know where I am right now. You’ve been asked to do a lot of things you may not have done if it weren’t for the Olympics, such as getting custom-made condoms from Thrillist because you thought the condoms in South Korea were “generic.” The “New York Times” also basically wrote an entire feature on your abs. What is the most ridiculous request that’s been asked of you? I don’t know if I’ve had a super ridiculous request, one that I can really think that I took seriously. I think people have asked me to do crazy things and I’m like, “Hahaha. And then I forgot about it a minute later.” The media loves getting you drunk. Here’s the thing: I don’t drink a lot. Barely anything. And so everyone’s like, “Haha, come on the show and just have drinks!” And I’m like, “OK.” So, I’ll have one or a little bit, but I feel like I’m way funnier not drunk. I’m not as sharp, I’m not as witty; I’m not myself when I’m drunk. I mean, I feel like I like to be in the moment, and if I’m in the moment, I can focus and then I can be quick and witty. This wild ride: If you could relive any part of it, which part would that be? I don’t know, because I still feel like I’m in the middle of a wild ride. I haven’t had a moment to really be like, “This Olympics experience is over,” ’cause right now I’m still skating a bunch with Stars on Ice, and I think when I finally have a day off, I’ll be like, “Oh, wow, there’s a lot going on.” But I haven’t had a day off, which I actually think is amazing and great, and I’m trying to enjoy
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June 2018
every single second. I think one thing that saved me is, I don’t really know what my schedule is. I just kind of plan a few days in advance; I don’t feel overwhelmed. I’m just having a good time with it.
der for just fun. You know how if you’ve ever been on Tinder you swipe left and right and it basically turns into this game?
How will you spend that day off? Um, probably napping.
It’s like the new Hot or Not. It’s absolutely that. So we just started chatting and basically I was looking for some — my criteria for a good boyfriend would be somebody who has passion. Passion is super important to me because no matter what you do, if you have passion for it, then that’s kind of what life is all about — that you have passion for something. I think that it’s important to stay motivated, to always want more for yourself — yeah. I’m being serious. Usually when I get asked this question, I’m like, a job, goes to the gym — which is also important.
The whole day? The whole day. Anything you haven’t been able to do since you’ve been on this all-consuming ride? Honestly, the only thing I haven’t been good at doing is sleeping. There you go: a 24-hour nap. A recharge, yup, exactly. Reese Witherspoon is one of your biggest fans. Which Reese movie do you most identify with? Legally Blonde. It’s true. It’s the first Reese movie that I ever watched and how I always still think of her, which isn’t fair cause she’s done so much. But yeah, I adore her. What is it about the character of Elle Woods you most identify with? That she just thinks she can get into Harvard and it’s not gonna be a big deal, and she does. And I, in my life, am like, “It’s not a big deal, I can do it, and I can make it happen.” You have a new man, named Jussi-Pekka Kajaala. He’s very good-looking. I do. He’s super cute, but more than that, he’s super nice and funny and everything that everybody should be. Before you met, what criteria did you have for a boyfriend? So, I’ve known him for a little over half a year, and really wasn’t looking for anybody. I mean, I was on Tin-
Oh yeah, I have Tinder. So you know the game.
When you were on Tinder, how many people actually thought you were really Adam Rippon? I think when I was on Tinder nobody really gave a shit that I was Adam Rippon. But I can tell you that everyone I’ve ever matched with who’s ghosted on me has messaged me since the Olympics. My favorite is, “Oh, it’s been a while. How ya doing?” And I’m like, “Bye.” You give them more than they deserve, honestly. Usually I don’t answer. What’s a place you wish you could go where you wouldn’t be recognized? I don’t mind being recognized at all. I don’t mind it. But if I could go somewhere right now, I would wanna go to Maui. Just a vacation. Get some sun. Doing Dancing with the Stars, it definitely changed my skin tone — due to, like, sprays, not sun.
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June 2018 |
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Do you expect there will be a day when an openly gay figure skater can just be a figure skater? Yeah. And I think more than that, I hope there’s a day that an openly gay Olympian will just be an Olympian. But I think that right now it’s important to share your story. It’s important for everybody to share your story, especially in a day and age when an athlete can go to the Olympics and you can be like, oh, let me know a little bit more about that athlete. You go on their social media page, you know what their likes are, you know what they’re doing, you know where they are, you know what their interests are; you can just so easily find out information about everybody that I think it’s important to show the world who you are, what you stand for, and what’s important to you.
For me, it’s not being gay that I share — I share my coming out because it was really liberating for me, and when I came out, when I was able to share that, that’s what I found so much power in. It wasn’t like, “Oh, I’m gay and I’m powerful” — which is, like, so true — but it was my coming out experience of when I started to really own who I was and that’s where I found a lot of power. I was always me, but I didn’t always own it. And when I owned it, that’s when I found that I was my strongest. Have you had any particularly moving exchanges with young queer fans? Yes. There have been many. I’ve run into a few young people who told me that they tried to kill themselves at one point, which is incredibly hard to hear, especially from
really young kids. It’s incredibly bizarre to be thanked for just being who you are, and for someone to tell you that you really helped them. It’s incredibly humbling, but I can tell you that I was not expecting that kind of response after the Olympics. Is there a responsibility or pressure on you to act or be a certain way because of that? No more than the way that I’ve been acting. Good. To end, which Golden Girl are you? Probably Blanche. Isn’t everyone Blanche? And I’m a little — OK, I’m mostly Dorothy. It’s the snark. It is the snark. Q As editor of Q Syndicate, Chris Azzopardi has interviewed a multitude of superstars, including Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey and Beyoncé. Reach him via his website at chris-azzopardi.com and on Twitter (@chrisazzopardi).
58 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FOOD & DRINK
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June 2018
restaurant review
Shiny new eateries BY JOSHUA JONES WITH STEVE FINAU
Who
doesn’t want that tight, gyrating go-go dancer? The titillating feel of newness with cat-like prowess? It’s true whether you’re talking about lovers, or cars, or restaurants — our DNA is triggered by the current and contemporary … it’s part of being creative, sentient beings. As much as we’d like to talk about new cars, or what’s trending with the twinks, this is a restaurant column, and Michael has reminded us to keep it on-point. (Especially after last month’s column that gazed over Luan from CHAKRA LOUNGE a bit too long). The restaurant scene in Salt Lake is like WeHo trade boys — there is something fresh coming along every
time you turn your head. A partial list of the new and shiny includes: AVENUES BISTRO from the folks behind FIRESIDE ON REGENT; LAST COURSE; KIRAAAK where COPPER BOWL used to be; HAMACHI PESCATARIAN; NOMAD by the airport; the new ALAMEXO CANTINA at 9th & 9th; THE DISPENSARY is hitting home runs in the Ballpark neighborhood; a few blocks over, FRIDA made the transition to RICO COCINA Y TEQUILA BAR this month; and finally, PRETTY BIRD CHICKEN, whose big breasts are the talk of the town. Coming soon: 16 POST OFFICE PLACE from Takashi, where KRISTAUF’S used to be; FRESHIES, the award-winning lobster roll cracks open a 9th South location; ESTE DELI expands to Main Street; and a little farther down, where short-lived SOCO got fried, the owners of PLEIKU strut their stuff with LONDON BELLE. (This is a partial
list, Michael doesn’t pay us enough to be comprehensive!) And, this is only downtown, it doesn’t consider the bevy of culinary delights opening daily outside of our little but liberal island. With all the fresh things to gawk over, it’s easy to forget the stalwarts of the community which laid the path for these virgins to plant their seed in the culinary landscape. For instance, places like CANNELLA’S (204 E. 500 South), whose recent remodel and a mild menu update have made a 40-year establishment seem new again. The Brussel Sprouts and Kale Salad ($12) with sliced apples, pecans, and a maple vinaigrette is a master class in how to make kale delicious. If it isn’t Pride season, take a fork to the towering Lasagna ($15), like grandma used to make. MEDITRINA (165 W. Harvey Milk Blvd.), whose sangria alone is worth a visit, has been slogging it out for a decade. First by the ballpark, and now in the up-and-coming Central Ninth neighborhood; I don’t
believe the owners have ever received the attention they deserve. They were doing tapas long before anyone else in Salt Lake, and continue to elevate the trend, long past its trendiness. Additionally, their Lobster Beignets ($13) with charred scallion remoulade is delightful, and the Tempura Frog Leg ($12) is spicy, daring, and imaginative. One of my favorite forgotten gems is EM’S (271 N. Center St.). You’ll receive delightful service on their spectacular patio, or inside the candlelit, intimate interior. Many items on the menu have been there since opening, and for good reason — they are original and delicious. I return to the Leek-stuffed, Wild Salmon Roulade over creamy cabbage ($26) and the Tamales ($12) stuffed with goat cheese on a bed of chipotle con crema. Like Meditrina, a table would leave happy if they stick to the small plates menu, especially the Smoked Salmon Crab Rolls ($16) with avocado, sesame seed vinaigrette, and cilantro oil.
June 2018 |
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DINING GUIDE Most Fabby in Park City
There are dozens of places in this vein. Places whose sheen has worn thin, but talent runs deep. We admittedly haven’t patronized any of these places in a while,
because (again) there are many new places to evaluate. Who has been to TRIO recently? OASIS CAFE? BLUE IGUANA or RIO GRANDE CAFÉ? Alternatively, HIMALAYAN KITCHEN and CEDARS OF LEBANON? We are guessing many of you have moved on from the tried and true to the sexy sizzle of some sassy new sinewy snack. But just remember the older fellas know how to sizzle a sausage, and put a bun in the oven just as well as the newbie down the street. Q
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60 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | COMICS
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June 2018
June 2018 |
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62 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | MUSIC
hear me out
Qsaltlake.com |
Issue 280 |
June 2018
I found love at a Lorde concert — just not the kind I was expecting BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI
The
soundtrack of my love life as a full-grown gay man was written by a 21-year-old woman. I’m 35, so this is slightly concerning to my queer confidante. He doesn’t think I need to try to make myself any more available to the Snapchat demo who adorn their faces in cat whiskers and dog snouts. He demanded I “get off Grindr” at a recent Lorde concert in Detroit, rightfully fearing I may end up part of the broken hearts club — been there, done that; he knows — thanks to what Lorde has aptly deemed the “L-O-V-E-L-E-S-S generation.” My first Lorde concert was a sea of rainbow after a glitter storm; the Motor City’s queer collective appeared to have been summoned by collective Grindr heartbreak, shared interest in defiant Lorde-like dancing, and the New Zealander’s basically perfect album, Melodrama. Her follow-up to 2013’s Pure Heroine spoke to me as a hopeless romantic who has turned, thanks to our modern dating era (or whatever we’re calling it now) and its ADD culture, into a love cynic. The frustrating pangs of an opera grad student who won’t commit to in-person hangs but lingers from a distance with Grindr taps and messages, even though he has my actual phone number. Or the “emotionally unavailable” one. Or the one I kissed too soon. Lorde’s Melodrama album actually has nothing to do with these, or any of my latest dating fails. But Lorde knows when it comes to love, I’m
the problem, she’s the problem, you’re the problem. We’re all the fucking problem. Lorde in concert is a triumph of spirit and solidarity, with hordes of cool people (cool because they also like Lorde) collectively reveling in a wise-beyond-her-years musical mastermind who just last year, in June, released the Modern Love Bible. AT THE AGE OF 21. She wrote an entire anthology on why love’s a little bitch (except when it’s not). The songs she sung that night in Detroit spoke to 8,000 people who have lived the very deeply felt lyrics Lorde once typed into her iPhone Notes app. In the context of the show, “I think that you might be the same as me, behave abnormally,” a line from the show’s opener, “Homemade Dynamite,” resonated with a fresh sense of unity in a space where queers came to fume together, cry together, and move on together. For me, “Supercut” called to mind memories of last year, when I met a man in Palm Springs and took a whirlwind trip to Seattle to see if our budding romance could bud further (it didn’t). Lorde danced on stage, my mind danced back to that bittersweet bop being the theme for the weekend and its every fleeting moment. “Liability” presents dating woes with even more glaring matter-of-fact clarity: “The truth is I am a toy that people enjoy till all of the tricks don’t work anymore and then they are bored of me.” You know she knows she’s not alone. Watching queers hang their arms over their friends’ shoulders during “Perfect Places,” with Lorde — again, just 21 —
lyrically contemplating our endless quest for the magic answer to contentedness in life and love, was pure exhilaration. Affirmation, even. If perfect places are created by those in them, this was such a place. “But when we’re dancing, I’m alright,” she assured, dancing. Earlier, she performed a cover of Frank Ocean’s own ode to human connection, “Solo,” as if to emphasize the significance of finding our people — or a person. I think I found mine that night, as romantic love and the weight it holds on Melodrama took a backseat to all the other ways — lasting ways — love can blossom. I didn’t know it, however, until I was letting myself feel everything in a mix of freestyling queer men and women, some older than me, most younger. Suddenly, the album’s heartbreak seemed less heartbreaking; here I was in a buoyant not-so-loveless space with people (other Grindr users even!) who’ve all felt Lorde’s pain on her morose elegy “Writer in the Dark” and wandered aimlessly through love, waiting for our green light, and then, yes, kept going. That night, I came to get my heart broken. But instead, the maddening thought of romantic love evaporated, and loving gestures surrounded me. With the Melodrama album singing me home, I left enveloped in them — dancing, and feeling alright. Q Chris Azzopardi is the editor of Q Syndicate, the international LGBT wire service. Reach him via his website at www.chris-azzopardi.com and on Twitter @chrisazzopardi.
June 2018 |
Issue 280 | Qsaltlake.com
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64 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | SEX
Qsaltlake.com |
Issue 280 |
June 2018
Kink up your boots for the inaugural Utah Leather Pride Festival May 20 BY TONY HOBDAY
Michael Sanders, a chief organizer of the Utah Leather Pride Festival, said the idea of a leather pride fest surfaced three years ago following a disruption by some “uptight gay men” over the Utah Pride Committee allowing a smaller leather festival within Utah Pride. Sanders said the “uptight” men emailed Pride Festival donors, calling the inclusion of a leather section would be inappropriate and like a “Folsom Street Fair exhibition.” The idea subsequently was yanked. Though the Pride Committee offered to
try to get it in the next year, Sanders said, “No thank you. I’ll do this myself.” “I believe this segment of LGBTQ population is misunderstood and misrepresented, though a lot of our traditions have intersected with the gay community,” he said, adding, “Our community does have its problems, but the openness of our sexuality is kind of a big deal here in Utah.” Hence, May 20 launches the First Annual Indoor/Outdoor Utah Leather Pride Festival, celebrating the diverse LGBTQ and pansexual leather/kink/BDSM community in Utah. The one-day celebration features
community groups, local and national vendors, a full bar, entertainment, a sandbox, bootblacks, giveaways/prizes, and more.
MR. LEATHER SLUT TITLE AND MS. LEATHER SLUT TITLE COMPETITIONS Following the festival, the annual Mr. and Ms. SL♥UT competitions commence at 8:30 p.m. The mission of the contests is to promote leather culture among the Salt Lake City community. “We are looking for leather men and women who will act as ambassadors to work with various segments of both LGBTQ community and multiple layers of the radical sex communities.” Additionally, titleholders are passionate about activism, charity, and community building. They can articulately express their platform and excite those around them to get involved. To enter the competitions, apply at mrleatherslut.com or msleatherslut.com. Sanders is the current Mr. Leather SL♥UT master, and though stepping down in May, he will participate in the IML event later this year in Chicago. His legacy as Mr. Leather includes being a dynamic HIV/AIDS prevention crusader, including the testimonial of PrEP, which helps prevent HIV infection — he currently manages PrEP Talks, an initiative dedicated to educating on the wonder treatment. Over the last year, he traveled the state speaking about the leather community and HIV/AIDS, including BDSM symposiums to Westminster College students.
Sunday May 20th 12 pm: Festival doors open 8 pm: Festival doors closed www.msleatherslut.com 8 pm: Mr / Ms Leather SL♥UT Competition Doors Open 8:20 pm: Mr / Ms Leather SL♥UT Competition Starts 11:30 pm: Competition Ends More information at utahleatherpride.net
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sex in salt lake city
Timeline to a Happy Pride BY DR. LAURIE BENNETT-COOK
My all-time
favorite greeting is “Happy Pride!” I first heard it while I was attending my first Pride event. That was several years ago in San Francisco. Now years later, I like to reflect on how far the movement has come. In the midst of all the festivities, one may quickly forget that the ability we have to be so open is a relatively young one. Most are aware of the Stonewall riots 49 years ago this June and the Christopher Street Liberation March the following year that would become known as the first Pride Parade. We’ve accomplished a lot since, but here are highlights of some of the milestones over the past 25 years. 1993 — Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell is signed into law making it illegal for openly gay people to serve in the military. By stating it would also prohibit harassment of those who choose not to disclose their sexual orientation, justifies the law. 1995 — The Violent Crime Control and Law Enforcement Act includes the Hate Crimes Sentencing Act. It permits a judge to place harsher sentences to those who single out victims based on sexual orientation, religion, gender, disability, race, color, or nationality. Until this time, there were no harsher punishments for hate crimes anywhere in the U.S. 1996 — Defense of Marriage Act is signed by President Clinton which bans same-sex marriage and defines marriage as “A legal union between
one man and one woman as husband and wife.” — Three months after DOMA, a judge in Hawaii ruled that the state does not have a legal right to deprive same-sex couples of marriage. It makes Hawaii the first state to recognize same-sex couples the same rights as heterosexual couples. 2000 — Vermont adopts ‘Civil Unions’ which legalizes the union between same-sex couples. 2003 — Utah no longer deems homosexual activity illegal. Up to this point, if one was found guilty of sexual interaction with another of the same sex, it could be punishable with imprisonment. 2005 — California legislature passes a bill allowing marriage between same-sex couples providing rights and benefits regardless of orientation. 2008 — Voters in California approve Proposition 8, making same-sex marriage illegal. 2010 — A federal judge overturns Proposition 8, finding it unconstitutional for voters to determine who should have the right to marry another consenting adult. Same-sex marriage is once again permitted. 2011 — DADT is repealed, ending a ban on homosexual men and women from serving openly in the military. 2012 — President Obama becomes the first sitting president to state support of samesex couples to marry publicly. 2014 — The Supreme Court denies reviewing several cases, including one from Utah, legalizing same-sex marriage in
five states. 2015 — The Supreme Court legalizes same-sex marriage in all 50 states. 2016 — The Pentagon announces a lift of the ban on transgender people serving openly in the military. 2017 — DC residents become the first permitted the gender-neutral marker “X” on driver’s licenses and ID cards. — U.S. Department of Defense places a six-month delay on all transgender military applicants, followed one month later by the sitting president stating transgender individuals no longer may serve. — The State of Virginia elects an openly transgender candidate to the Virginia House of Delegates becoming the first transgender person to serve on state legislature in American history. — The Pentagon announces immediate processing of transgender military applicants
as two federal judges ruled against the prohibition of transgender individuals ability to serve. FEBRUARY 2018 — The first openly transgender person signed a contract to serve in our military. We’ve come a long way, but there is still work to do. There are communities still conducting conversion therapies and pushing for recognition as being viable. We still have many facing workplace discrimination because of their gender and orientation. And yet, to this day, gay men are denied the right to donate the life-saving resource of blood and plasma. With the current administration in place, more than ever there’s a need to make our voices heard. Let’s get to it! HAPPY PRIDE! Dr. Laurie Bennett-Cook is a Clinical Sexologist and Director of Sex Positive Los Angeles. Find out more at about.me/ kinkucation or email JustLBC@yahoo.com or Dr.LaurieBennettCook@gmail.com
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66 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | RELATIONSHIPS
the frivolist
5 things to do before giving your rocky relationship the kiss-off You can BY MIKEY ROX
take the easy way out when the going gets tough in your relationship (and you should if you don’t love your partner anymore), but there’s plenty of value and payoff in sticking the hard times out and trying to make it work. How you do that is up to you — there’s no right or wrong way — but these tips on putting the pieces of shattered partnership back together again are a great place to start.
1
CHECK YOURSELF FIRST
When we’re not connecting with our partners in a positive way, it’s easy to concentrate on their negative behavior — where they’re falling short and letting you down (and annoying the hell out of you while they’re at it) — instead of focusing on how we’re contributing and perhaps affecting the situation with our own behavior. “The trap within this mindset is that it focuses on what the other partner is doing or failing to do, but doesn’t make the individual accountable to their own choices and behaviors,” explains Anna Osborn, a licensed marriage and family therapist in California. “Doing a gut check on how you as an individual are showing up in the relationship and being willing to admit it can have a profound positive impact on the relationship. Doing this can also help couples make communication safer by demonstrating that each person can admit their mistakes and work together to create change without it being held against them.”
2
REVISIT WHAT EACH OF YOU VALUE
Most couples consider calling it quits because their feelings for one another change, but what they don’t realize is that feelings are supposed to change; none of us are the same at the beginning of a relationship as we are just a few years later. But common values, like affection, 6 4 8 5 7 9 1 3 2
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PUZZLE SOLUTIONS
quality time, fiscal responsibility, and loyalty, are what hold a healthy relationship together, and when couples work together in pursuit of these values, they’re more likely to re-experience positive feelings toward one another. Clinical psychologist Dr. Jill Gross says, “When couples feel out-of-sorts, it’s because either their values are changing and they aren’t talking about it with each other — sometimes because they aren’t aware of these changes themselves — and/ or because they are not spending time consciously living their values.” If this sounds like what’s going on in your rocky relationship, Dr. Gross recommends a few strategies: Find a list of values (this can easily be found online with a Google search, she says), sit down together to review and talk about the list while each of you circle his/ her top five values. Of the top five values, identify one or two that you two have in common. Once these values are identified, brainstorm together something you can do together in service of these values. “For example,” says Dr. Gross, “if [you] both notice that affection is on the top of your values list, I encourage [you] to get creative about setting aside a regular, prescribed amount of time dedicated solely to the practice of giving and receiving affection.” If you find you have no common values in your respective top five lists, Dr. Gross encourages you to seek outside assistance (relationship coaching or couples counseling) to help you dig a little deeper for creative ways to pursue your common values together.
3
MAKE AN APPOINTMENT WITH A COUPLE’S THERAPIST
Not all couples can fix their issues on their own — and there’s absolutely no shame in that. An unbiased, highly trained third party mediator may be just what you need to make progress toward healing old wounds, especially if your attempts at home end up in arguments where nobody walked away appreciating what the other was
Qsaltlake.com |
Issue 280 |
June 2018
trying to express. For this to work, however, you both have to be willing to take your sessions seriously while recognizing how helpful therapy can be and how crucial it may be to your relationship’s survival. To make the most of your time and money (couple’s therapy isn’t a drop in the bucket financially), go in with open minds and listen to what each other is conveying during the sessions rather than assuming attack positions right off the bat. The latter won’t accomplish anything except building more resentment at $100-plus an hour.
4
PLAN A GETAWAY TOGETHER
Whenever my boyfriend and I aren’t seeing eye-to-eye (or just getting on each other’s nerves on a more frequent basis than usual), I like to plan a getaway where we can forget about whatever’s going on at home and work and spend a couple days reconnecting. Our fighting doesn’t mean we don’t love each other anymore — quite the opposite, in fact; our moments of heated passion mean we love each other enough to spar about whatever’s driving us crazy about the other — and sometimes a few days unplugged and focused on our relationship help get us back on track.
5
STOP TALKING AND START LISTENING
Many of us — gay men, especially — like to talk at instead of listen to our partners. We think we’re right about everything (seriously, what’s that about?), but by and large, we’re probably not (and a lot of times we know it), so why don’t we give our partners an honest chance to tell us what they’re feeling? The mending process will move along much faster if we just shut our mouths every now and again. “Ask your partner what they need, and tell them what you need,” advises relationship expert David Bennett, who owns the relationship coaching company Double Trust Dating and Relationships with his twin brother. “Be honest and tell them they can be honest. In many cases, even couples who have been together for a long time have no idea what each person really needs to do to make things work. It could be as simple as listening more, offering to help out more around the house, or even giving the other person more alone time — which, by the way, research shows is very important to the health of a relationship. If neither partner can make an effort to work on meeting the needs, then it’s time to break up. However, a couple may find saving the relationship doesn’t take that much work.” Q
Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and LGBT lifestyle expert whose work has been published in more than 100 outlets across the world. Twitter @mikeyrox.
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Issue 280 | Qsaltlake.com
A new normal BY DOUG WOODALL
When
I was growing up, I didn’t know my mom was pretty. She was a fixture in my life, and she was severely nearsighted. Familiarity and her glasses hid her beauty from me. Now when I look at pictures of her from the 1960s and ’70s, I see a woman with a pretty face, dark hair that’s nearly black, and deep brown eyes. She’s petite — though she never thought she was, and she has a straight smile, but with slight gaps between her teeth. In 1964, my pretty mom was 34-years-old, and she found a lump in her left breast. That wasn’t a good time to have a life-threatening disease. I know it’s never a good time, but in my mom’s case, she had six children at home. The oldest was 11, and the youngest was six-, maybe nine-months-old. When she went to the hospital to have a biopsy, her surgeon had her put to sleep; he took the biopsy, found out she had cancer, and then performed a radical mastectomy. My mom didn’t know what her surgeon did to her until she woke up in her room and found out on her own that her breast was gone. She cried inconsolably. And that was just the start of the physical and mental pain my mom had to face to live. My mom was treated for cancer three times, and during her second bout, she had one more baby. From the time I was 7 until nearly 12, everyone at my house was anxious and stressed. Yet, I have some fond memories of that time. When my dad had to be Mr. Mom, he talked to us in a measured and tender way. When my mom was home recovering, we managed to keep a sober quietness. When we had to stay with our aunts and uncles, everyone treated us well.
gay writes
And in time, the horrors ended, and a new normal started. Yes, my mom was burned with radiation, her body horribly scarred, and instead of her left breast, she had a prosthesis. I wonder if you’ll take half a minute to try to understand what it meant for my mom to wear a prosthesis. The thing wasn’t a part of her body. It was strapped on and pushed into her chest. It got sweat on it, and it got dirty. When my mom was in public, she always wore it, but when she was home, she often pulled it out and laid it down wherever she was. It opened the door to some unusual situations. I’d sit on one of the chairs, and in a short time, I’d find I was sitting with my mom’s breast. When I’d take a nap on one of the couches, I’d wake up to find I’d been sleeping with my mom’s breast. I’d take a seat at the table to eat breakfast, and I’d find it was with me — a bowl of Wheaties and my mom’s breast. Then I had some problems when friends came to my house. One time, my mom was working on a quilt, and her breast was sitting on top of it. My friend said, “Hey! My mom makes quilts, too.” He picked up my mom’s breast and added, “And she’s got a pincushion like this.” “I bet she doesn’t,” I said. “No, really she does.” “That’s not a pincushion.” “It’s not? What is it?” “That is my mom’s breast.” “What!” He dropped it, and said, “They come off?” I said, “Just leave my mom’s breast alone. OK?” My mom misplaced her breast and outright lost it a few times. When she misplaced it, we all stopped what we were doing and searched the house until we found her breast. When she lost it, she had to buy a new one, but prostheses are somewhat expensive. One time, we were returning home from a camping trip. My mom said to my dad, “Honey, I don’t have my prosthesis.” “You’re kidding. Do you think it’s at the campsite?” my dad said.
“That’s the only place it could be.” “Shit! We’re 200 miles away.” “You know, I should just make my own. I can make a covering. I just need to find the right thing to put inside.” “That’s not a problem,” my dad said. “There’s a 10-million-dollar industry making that stuff.” In a short time, five reams of what I’m calling “educational catalogs” filled our mailbox, and several stacks of products sat by my mom’s sewing machine until she found the right one. And she made 10 breasts.
A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 67
My mom’s life was decidedly easier, but not mine. Now, when I sat in one of the chairs, I had a greater chance of sitting with one of her breasts. If I took a nap on the couch, I was more likely to sleep with two of my mom’s breasts. When I sat down to have breakfast, it was me, a bowl of Wheaties, and three of her breasts. And I had more friends who said, “My mom makes quilts, too.” Q Gay Writes is a DiverseCity Series writing group, a program of SLCC’s Community Writing Center. The group meets the 2nd and 4th Mondays of each month, 6:30–8 p.m., 210 E. 400 South.
68 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | MARKETPLACE
AC C O M M O DAT I O N S
marketplace C AT E R I N G
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70 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | QMMUNITY
Qmmunity Groups ALCOHOL & DRUG
Alcoholics Anonymous 801-484-7871 utahaa.org LGBT meetings: Sun. 3p Acceptance Group, UPC, 255 E 400 S Mon. 7p Gay Men’s Stag (Big Book Study), UPC, 255 E 400 S 8p G/Q Women’s Mtg, Disability Law Center (rear), 205 N 400 W Tues. 8:15p Live & Let Live, UPC, 255 E 400 S Wed. 7p Sober Today, 375 Harrison Blvd, Ogden Fri. 8p Stonewall Group, UPC, 255 E 400 S Crystal Meth Anon crystalmeth.org Sun. 1:30pm Clean, Sober & Proud LGBTQIA+Straight USARA, 180 E 2100 S Thurs. 1p Unity In Sobriety, 175 S 700 E LifeRing Secular Recovery 385-258-3788 liferingutah.org Sun. 10am Univ. Neuropsychiatric Institute, 501 Chipeta Way #1566 Mon. 5pm, First Unitarian Church, 569 S 1300 E Tues. 7pm, 6876 S Highland Dr Wed. noon, 2319 Foothill Dr, #120
Weds. 6:30 pm, Univ Neuropsych Institute, 501 Chipeta Way #1566 Thurs. 5:30pm, USARA, 180 E 2100 S, #100 Fri. 7pm, 2212 S West Temple #29 Sat. 11am, First Baptist Church, 777 S 1300 E BUSINESS
LGBTQ-Affirmative Psycho-therapists Guild of Utah lgbtqtherapists.com * jim@lgbtqtherapists.com Utah Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce utahgaychamber. com * info@utahgaychamber.com Vest Pocket Business Coalition vestpocket.org 801-596-8977 DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233 YWCA of Salt Lake ywca.org/ saltlakecity 322 E 300 S 801-537-8600 HEALTH & HIV
Peer Support for Mental Illness — PSMI Thurs 7pm, Utah Pride Ctr (when reopened) Planned Parenthood 654 S 900 E 800-230-PLAN Salt Lake County Health Dept HIV/STD Clinic 660 S 200 E, 4th Floor Walk-ins M–F 10a–4p Appts 385-468-4242
Qsaltlake.com |
Utah AIDS Foundation utahaids.org * mail@utahaids.org 1408 S 1100 E 801-487-2323 Weber-Morgan Health Mon., Weds 1-4:30p 477 23rd St, Ogden Appt 801-399-7250 HOMELESS SVCS
Volunteers of America Homeless Youth Resource Ctr, ages 15–21 880 S 400 W 801-364-0744 Transition Homes:
RELIGIOUS
First Baptist Church firstbaptist-slc.org * office@firstbaptistslc.org 11a Sundays 777 S 1300 E 801-582-4921 Sacred Light of Christ slcchurch.org 823 S 600 E 801-595-0052 11a Sundays Wasatch Metropolitan Community Church wasatchmcc.org 801-889-8764 Sundays, 11a at Mestizo Coffee, 631 W N Temple
Young Men’s
SOCIAL
801-433-1713
1 to 5 Club (bisexual) fb.me/1to5ClubUtah The Bonnie and Clyde’s Social Group bit.ly/BonnieClydeSG Alternative Garden Club bit.ly/altgarden * altgardenclub@gmail.com blackBOARD Men’s Kink/Sex/BDSM education, 1st, 3rd Mons. blackbootsslc.org blackBOOTS Kink/BDSM Men’s leather/kink/ fetish/BDSM 4th Sats. blackbootsslc.org Gay Writes writing group, DiverseCity 6:30 pm Mondays Community Writing Ctr, 210 E 400 S Ste 8 Get Outside Utah bit.ly/GetOutsideUtah Men Who Move menwhomove.org OUTreach Utah Ogden outreachutah.org
Young Women’s 801-359-5545 LEGAL
Rainbow Law Free Clinic 2nd Thurs 6:30–7:30pm UofU Law School, 383 S University St POLITICAL
Equality Utah equalityutah.org * info@equalityutah.org 175 W 200 S, Ste 1004 801-355-3479 Utah Libertarian Party 6885 S State St #200 888-957-8824 Utah Log Cabin Republicans bit.ly/logcabinutah 801-657-9611 Utah Stonewall Democrats utahstonewalldemocrats.org
OWLS of Utah (Older, Wiser, Lesbian. Sisters) bit.ly/owlsutah Queer Friends queerfriends.org qVinum Wine Tasting qvinum.com fb.me /QVinum/ Sage Utah, Seniors fb.me/sageutah sageutah@ utahpridecenter.org 801-557-9203 Temple Squares Square Dance Club templesquares.org 801-449-1293 Utah Bears utahbears.com fb.me/utahbears info@utahbears.com Weds 6pm Raw Bean Coffee, 611 W Temple Utah Male Naturists umen.org info@umen.org Utah Pride Center utahpridecenter.org info@ utahpridecenter.org New location soon 801-539-8800 SPORTS
Pride Community Softball League fb.me/utahpride. softballleague pcsl@prideleague.com Q Kickball League fb.me/qsaltlake. kickball Sundays, 10:30, 11:30, Sunnyside Park QUAC — Queer Utah Aquatic Club quacquac.
Issue 280 |
June 2018
questions@ quacquac.org Salt Lake Goodtime Bowling League bit.ly/slgoodtime Stonewall Shooting Sports of Utah fb.me/stonewall. sportsofutah Venture Out Utah facebook.com/groups/ Venture.OUT.Utah
YOUTH/COLLEGE
Encircle LGBTQ Family and Youth Resource Center encircletogether.org fb.me/encircletogether 91 W 200 S, Provo, Gay-Straight Alliance Network gsanetwork.org Salt Lake Community College LGBTQ+ 8 slcc.edu/lgbtq/ University of Utah LGBT Resource Center 8 lgbt.utah.edu 200 S Central Campus Dr Rm 409 801-587-7973 USGA at BYU fb.me/UsgaAtByu Utah State Univ. Access & Diversity Ctr usu.edu/ accesscenter/lgbtqa Utah Valley Univ Spectrum facebook.com/ groups/uvuspectrum Weber State University LGBT Resource Center weber.edu/ lgbtresourcecenter 801-626-7271
org
BUT WITH A CAPE
Embracing the health & resilience of our community Utah’s Inclusive Aquatic Club since 1995 BEGINNERS WELCOME EVERYONE’S INVITED
umen.org
June 2018 |
Issue 280 | Qsaltlake.com
QMMUNITY | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 71
72 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | PETS
Qsaltlake.com |
Issue 280 |
June 2018
Pet Month of the Harriet
7 years old, female, domestic longhair, diluted calico
Is your dad man enough?
Harriet is a lady who like things her way. She’d be content being a companion to adult people in a mellow household, as she can get overstimulated. Her favorite spot to relax is in her cubby bed where she can snooze the day away. Harriet does have kidney disease and needs to continue her special diet in her new home.
This Father’s Day, bring home a cat.
$0 adoption fees* on cats, June 11–17 All pets are spayed or neutered, microchipped and ready to go home. Best Friends Pet Adoption Center 2005 South 1100 East Monday – Saturday, 11 a.m. – 7 p.m. Sunday, 11 a.m. – 4 p.m.
For more information, go to Best Friends Animal Society–Utah, 2005 S 1100 East, or call 801-574-2454 or go to bestfriendsutah.org
*Offer applies to cats four months and older
bestfriendsutah.org
q scopes JUNE BY SAM KELLEY-MILLS
ARIES March 20–April 19
A failure in communication with a friend can cause some problems. Remember that we are all human, and the failings of others are mistakes, not assaults. More likely than not, a friends carefree attitude is simply their way of dealing with their problems. Take a moment to do the same and simply chill out for a bit.
TAURUS Apr 20–May 20
Feeling that things could be going better right now? Likely this feeling comes from boredom rather than failure. There is always a higher conquest and a goal to accomplish, but only because you want more than you have. Look for some new adventures but don’t lose sight of how good things are right now either.
GEMINI May 21–June 20
Running away from a problem will make it worse. Find creative solutions and everything will turn out for the best. Inspiration will flow from meeting with a good friend or lover. The longer you wait to take action,
the worse the overall results could be. Get it over and done with. Spend time working on the things that matter.
CANCER June 21–July 22
Get used to having your way when things are going well, but don’t lose a sense of objectivity. A hard time is always possible, and leading astray is a real possibility if consideration for the absurd is lost. Have a wild time and get your head clear and in the right place. Only then will the outside stimuli become null and void.
LEO July 23–August 22
your mind and let it go of preconceptions.
LIBRA Sept 23–October 22
There is plenty of room at the table for extra guests, so welcome those who show respect and courtesy. Not everyone is worth your time, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t worth to be found. Keep learning as much as you can about the people you know, and find a sense of place that has been recently absent. Life is complex.
SCORPIO Oct. 23–Nov. 21
Don’t let your voice go unheard. But don’t be so loud that you can’t hear others. A workplace conflict can be avoided if fairness in communication can be followed. Obtain something valuable and don’t let it go until it is no longer useful. Life is all about gaining and giving up. Find balance, and validation will always follow.
The quality of a new toy will amaze you beyond belief. Don’t worry if others are jealous, but don’t share with those who are simply looking to take advantage. There is no need to look too deep into a personal situation that has been causing a rift in your belief system. Instead, prioritize and focus on the things you enjoy now.
VIRGO August 23–Sep. 22
Nov. 22–December 20.
A vision of beauty has become the standard for potential lovers, but don’t let it hold you back from seeing others on their own terms. Don’t lose the human element of a personal relationship, but instead realize that not all difficulties are challenges, but simply different perceptions. Expand
SAGITTARIUS
Be wise and advise a friend who is looking for comfort. The consequence for turning away could be dire, so be the friend you know you can be. There is a question in your heart regarding the future of a personal relationship with a family member. Keep interactions light and unity will
become a defining trait in all you do.
CAPRICORN Dec 21–Jan 19
The need to flex the muscle of authority could be a turn off to others. Don’t be so impressed by your accomplishments that it undermines the efforts to gain respect. A friend or lover is finding an obsession rather weary, but don’t let this get you down. Find satisfaction through casual fun and lay off the need to prove yourself.
AQUARIUS Jan. 20–Feb. 18
The closer you get to the truth of a matter at work, the better you’ll feel about the daily grind. There are a time and place for gossip, or so you are led to believe. In reality, choices are to be made over whether you should say something to a trusted friend or simply keep a secret. Information is power, and discretion is vital.
PISCES Feb 19–Mar 19
A fellowship of friends and lovers is going to lead to nice times. Enjoy what you can and do your best to stay safe. There could be drama, but that is to be expected. No one is trying to bring you down, despite some suggestions. Allow good feelings to be channeled into the work you are doing. It never hurts to feel inspired. Q
June 2018 |
PETS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 73
Issue 280 | Qsaltlake.com
WE’VE GOT EVERYONE’S BACK
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*Offer valid for first visit only. Initial visit includes consultation, exam and adjustment. Please present offer at the time of redemption. © 2017 The Joint Corp.
74 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | EVENTS
Qsaltlake.com |
Aja and Willam coming for Pride after-hours JRC Events and Metro Music Hall present SLC PRIDE 2018 or a nightlife addition to Utah Pride events, featuring headlining performances by RuPaul’s Drag Race’s Aja and Willam, June 1 and 2, respectively.
FRIDAY 6/1: AJA Hosted By: Cartel Chameleon Beats By: DJ Justin Hollister and DJ Eddy V Aja, who took her drag name from the 1982 Bollywood film Disco
Issue 280 |
June 2018
Dancer, has over 800,000 followers on her Instagram @ajathekween and was a Season 9 favorite on Ru Paul’s Drag Race. She was the youngest queen, at 22, to be in RuPaul’s Drag Race: All Stars on and has been doing drag in Manhattan since she was 16. Her bio says she is a “unique polymerization of sex, 90’s ballroom culture, & kawaii harajuku inspiration. From queer events to bars/clubs/holes in the wall to even a TV near you, this queen will leave you mesmerized with her precision, wit and eclecticism.” This drag extravaganza includes performances by Feral, Chelsea Siren, Mercury Adams, Lilia Maughn, Georgia Coldwater, Terra Flesh, Aphrodeity, and Eva Chanel Stephens.
SATURDAY 6/2: WILLAM
UTAH’S BEST BURGER Winner
2013 Fabby Awards
“Best Burger Joint”
Winner
2014 Fabby Awards
“Best Burger Joint”
Winner
2015 Fabby Awards
“Best Burger Joint”
Winner
2016 Fabby Awards
“Best Burger Joint”
Winner
2017 Fabby Awards
“Best Burger Joint”
LUCKY13SLC.COM
135 W. 1300 S. | 801.487.4418
Hosted By: Gia Bianca Stephens Beats By: DJ Shutter and DJ Justin Hollister Night two brings Willam — a pussyfootin, bigmouth model/actress/mattress who makes the dicks hard & avoids dairy. She was in RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 4 and is the only queen ever disqualified from the series. She is a prolific YouTube personality with almost 850,000 followers. Includes fabulous performances by Indi Skies, London Skies, Molly Mormon, Kay Bye, The Whore of 94, Xaina, Lisa Dank, and Austin Bakaric. The doors for both nights open at 9 p.m., Metro Music Hall, 615 W. 100 South. Tickets $20 GA/$40 VIP at jrcslc. com, 21+ only.
June 2018 |
Issue 280 | Qsaltlake.com
EVENTS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 75
Just one of the guys
june 21-24 library square uaf.org
Get your mind off ED.
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76 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E
Qsaltlake.com |
Salt Lakers Stockton McBride (left) and Johnny Hebda are creating monthly circuit-like events
Duo to bring monthly circuittype dance events to Salt Lake BY BLAIR HOWELL
White Party in Palm Springs. Masterbeat in Los Angeles. The Chapel in West Hollywood. And now, SKYFALL in Salt Lake City.
Issue 280 |
June 2018
Combining talents for live performance and circuit-dance events, two SLC businessmen introduce monthly California-style circuit nights to Wasatch Front nightlife. Stockton McBride and Johnny Hebda feel that SLC’s vibrant gay community is ready for a local circuit night, where guests convene to bond socially, sexually, and musically. “I heard that Sky SLC management was interested in launching a ‘gay-friendly’ night to their variety of events,” Hebda says. Hence, the premiere of SKYFALL. “This is something Utah needs and doesn’t have,” he continues. “My buddy Stockton and I shared this vision, and felt that between our passion and unique backgrounds, [we could] make something happen in SLC.” “What’s exciting about a circuit night is a combination of music, dancing, sexy men, and enjoying the night with your friends at this distinctive gay-targeted event,” adds McBride. “It’s the atmosphere and feeling comfortable in a space that was intended for the LGBT community just to be ourselves and have fun.” Promising to be perfect mark-your-calendar themed evenings, SKYFALL takes
4th Annual Ogden Pride Festival 3 Days of Family Fun for the Whole Family
August
2nd - Soiree Dinner 3rd - Youth Drag Show
4th - Pride Festival watch for more details @
ogdenpride.org
Ogden Amphitheater 12-8 pm
June 2018 |
A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 77
Issue 280 | Qsaltlake.com
place at Sky SLC, the last Friday of each month. The premiere event is June 29, designated with a red theme, following a traditional element of AIDS awareness. “We are putting forth great efforts to bring out-of-state DJs, dancers, and performers, along with teaming up with a very talented team of creators to help us with content, marketing, and visual content. It will have a similar professional look and feel as those West Hollywood and Vegas clubs,” continues Hebda. “Carrying forward with the image and feel that Sky SLC has established, the spin-off on the name should suit well and tie into the look and feel of other popular circuit nights.” “What makes circuit night an attractive event, is awesome music and great energy that creates an upbeat mood. As well as a venue that flows
Sky SLC at The Gateway will be home to SkyFall monthly circuit party-like events
well and covers many people’s interests,” says McBride. “SKYFALL is the first circuit night in SLC, so that makes it unique and appealing to the community.” While circuit is a unique phenomenon to emerge from
over the past few decades, the international circuit scene is enormous. Ever-more-elaborate décors and entertainments, and marquee events attract thousands of circuit devotees to travel across the country to attend. Beginning
in 1974, Chicago’s White Party is possibly the granddaddy circuit party, but similar events take place across the country and hundreds more around the globe. Q More info at facebook.com/SkyfallSLC
78 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FINAL WORD
Qsaltlake.com |
Issue 280 |
June 2018
the perils of petunia pap smear
A tale of a throne fit for a queen BY PETUNIA PAP SMEAR
The road
to the Pride Festival is fraught with danger and excitement. Gay Pride Day is one of the biggest highlights of my year. I love all the excitement, of getting ready for the parade. I usually spend six months planning on what to wear. But the Pride Parade and Festival have specific dangers for a drag queen that may not be obvious to the average Muggle. I usually arrive at the parade assembly area super early. I help put the finishing touches on a float; then I wander around looking at the other floats and, of course, pausing for photos. Many folks come to me offering bottled water or other drinks which I feel I must politely decline. It’s not that I’m not thirsty, it’s because I fear that if I drink anything, I may have to visit one of the many “Gotta-Go Potties” lining the parade route and festival grounds. Several years ago, while at the festival, I needed to “drain the radiator.” I joined a long line of fellow Pride revelers, impatiently waiting to “shake hands with the vicar.” The line progressed ever so slowly. Consequently, I ended up crossing my legs and hopping about while trying to prevent a premature “tapping of the kidney” only to discover to my dismay that when I reached the door, my beehive hair and breasticles wouldn’t fit. Apparently, the average “Doodie Calls” booth isn’t designed to accommodate a drag queen in her finest pride regalia. OH, SHIT!
7pm, May 18 and June 15 First Baptist Church, 777 S 1300 E fb.me/matronsofmayhem
Hurriedly, I enlisted the assistance of a couple of friends who helped me remove my hair and twirly breasticle nipples, and held them while I did my business. Upon entering, a wave of heat immediately slammed into me. That “Wizard of Ooze, Ltd” booth had been baking in the hot sun all day. It must have been at least 120 degrees with no air circulation. Instantaneously, I started sweating buckets. I was wearing a 7-layer crinoline skirt over panties and pantyhose. By facing nine layers of protection, there is no quick access to “Admiral Winky” — only to patiently lift one skirt at a time, counting them, so as not to leave a layer to act as a shower curtain retaining the “squeezing of the lemon juice.” Not only could I barely count to nine, when I realized that with my breasticles in the way, but there was also no possible direct line of sight to “Homo Erectus” nor the target “Tanks A Lot“ urinal. It was only blind faith and my belief in the power of Maybelline waterproof mascara that helped me kind of aim and shoot. Oh, the pain of salt in my eyes. Once I finished “Sprinkling Holy Water,” it was all I could do to put myself back together enough to open the door. My friends used their bodies as a shield so that I could restore my beehive hair and twirling nipples. We wouldn’t want the Muggles to see how the magic happens, would we? For the next several years, I didn’t eat or drink anything on Pride, for fear of a repeat. Over the course of the next several years at Pride, I only suffered heat exhaustion three times. One time Michael Aaron took one look at me and led me by the hand to the shade of the VIP section, sat me by the large water dispensers, and left me there for two hours until I regained my senses. I was always careful when eating food at the festival. One, because the logistics of getting food to my mouth around the breasticles is difficult. Two, the fear of the “Nuclear Poo”— kind of poo that
comes as a complete surprise at a time that is either inappropriate, i.e., during lovemaking or a root canal or you are nowhere near pooing facilities. Therefore, I would triple dose on Imodium on Pride Day because I certainly didn’t want to think about what it would take to “Go Boom Boom.” My worst nightmare is a “Wet Poo” — where you wipe your ass 50 times, and it still feels unwiped. So you end up putting toilet paper between your ass and your underwear to alleviate dreadful skid marks. I’m sure that I was beginning to develop a case of “POOZOPHERENIA.” A fear of pooing — that can be fatal! It was only two years ago that I was promised that I could, if needed, use the facilities at The Leonardo. Oh my goodness, with this newfound freedom, I drank water along the parade and had lunch at the festival. How cheery was I. Subsequently, I discovered that I could fit into one of the handicap “Plop Jon” portables. Truly a throne fit for a queen. This story leaves us with several important questions: 1. What do you call a fairy using the toilet? Stinker Bell? 2. What do you call a bathroom Superhero? Flush Gordon? 3. Should I have tipped the friends who held my hair and boobs? 4. Are “Willy Make It” booth accidents the beginning of water sports? 5. Was it because of self-induced constipation that I was sometimes a wee bit cranky? These and other eternal questions will be answered in future chapters of The Perils of Petunia Pap Smear. Q
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