QSaltLake Magazine - Issue 313 - July 2020

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Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 313 | JULY, 2020

from the editor

Amplify Black Voices

BY MICHAEL AARON

While

the country, and the world, began protesting and rioting in the streets over systemic racism after the murder of George Floyd, I began writing a post of my thoughts.

Before I hit the “Post” button, I decided this wasn’t a time to hear from me — a Caucasian who only has a small sense of what it is like to live as a Black person in this country. That small sense comes from reading and hearing the voices of others who actually are Black and living in this country. I decided that, for me, it was a time to amplify

their voices rather than wax poetic on my own.

I think it was a post from Crystal Young-Otterstrom that made me change my mind.

“Fellow white people, if it’s your inclination to say something like ‘yes it’s our American right to protest but violence is not the answer’ — just stop. Stop and listen and learn how to be better.

All of us can be better. That’s our only job right now. Not judgment. Then, talk to your kids about racism. #blacklivesmatter.”

It’s time to listen and learn.

I posted a video of Coach Kenny Akers, confronting looters at the 7-Eleven downtown.

“Violence is not the answer,” he yelled. “Look at me in my face. I know the pain.

Do it right. Listen to me, as a Black man. This isn’t how you do it. Protest all you want.

We’re supposed to be in this together. We’re not supposed to be destroying each other.

This is want they want. They want us to fight each other.”

I posted an op-ed from Adrienne Andrews, chief diversity officer for Weber State University, calling for us to “See us: The rainbow of humanity.”

She quoted Black lesbian feminist poet Pat Parker, who wrote: “The first thing you do is to forget that I’m Black.

Second, you must never forget that I’m Black.”

I posted the words of author/activist and chair of the Utah Black Roundtable Darlene McDonald.

“I also fume over the attempted murder of Christian Cooper in Central Park when a white woman named Amy Cooper called the police on him. It was a timely display for all of us to see how privilege allows mainly white people, and especially white women, to weaponize the police.”

In this issue, there are several guest editorials from the voices of Black LGBTQ people. Please read them.

And please, sit down, open your ears and minds, and help amplify local Black voices. Q

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news The top national and world news since last issue you should know LA Pride March steps in it What was to be a “solidarity protest march” organized by the Los Angeles LGBTQ Pride to replace the COVID-19canceled June Pride Parade has turned controversial.

The organizers of LA Pride announced that its plan for a march relating to the nationwide demonstrations over the Minneapolis police slaying of George Floyd would be turned over to All Black Lives Matter, an advisory board of Black LGBTQ activists, and community leaders. LA Pride’s misstep was that the organizers sought to coordinate with the Los Angeles Police Department for the parade. The Twitter-mob pointed out it was insensitive of organizers to coordinate with the LAPD to ensure traffic control and safety for a demonstration to protest police activity and advocate for defunding the LAPD (as has been proposed by the city’s Mayor). The organizers declared, “We recognize systemic racism, implicit bias and privilege permeate this country, and this includes the history of our organization.”

for shouting a gay slur at a protester during an incident caught on video and went viral. After a police brutality protester apparently threw a traffic cone and barricade at an officer, the officer turned and shouted, “Bitch! Wait till I turn my back, you fucking faggot!” The Chicago mayor got involved holding a news conference and saying, “We will not tolerate profanity and homophobic comments that demean the badge, demean the honor of being a Chicago police officer, and demean the value of who we are as Chicagoans.”

Death takes a bigot, Rev. Lou Sheldon Reverend Lou Sheldon, who in 1980 founded the Traditional Values Coalition opposed to, among other things, homosexuality, has died at 85.

The group had a significant impact on anti-gay rights circles in the 1980s and 1990s.

In 2010 Southern Poverty Law Center tagged the Coalition as an anti-LGBT hate group.

Sheldon suggested forcibly, “Rounding up AIDS victims into ‘cities of refuge,’ like leper colonies.” He thought hate crime laws “protect sex with animals and the rape of children as forms of political expression.” He also proposed a famous porn fantasy that “homosexuals come to the door and if your son answers, they grab the son and run off with him and turn him into a homosexual.”

Gotta watch your mouth

Death takes a hero, Larry Kramer, RIP

It’s so mystifying that with all the cameras citizens carry on them that police officers don’t think before they act.

Even when it’s just mouthing off. Chicago’s police accountability board is recommending that an officer be disciplined

Larry Kramer, author and passionate AIDS activist, has died at age 84. The proximate cause of death was pneumonia, according to his husband.

Kramer lived with HIV and had undergone a liver transplant several years ago.

Kramer is best known as a founder of Gay Men’s Health Crisis — the first HIV/AIDS service organization — and of the direct-action group ACT UP, both in New York City. He was also a novelist and an Oscar-nominated screenwriter as the author of the Tony-winning play, The Normal Heart. Famous for his confrontational style, he was kicked out of the GMHC. On his exit he said the group was, “a sad organization of sissies.”

Kramer called Dr. Anthony Fauci, director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, a murderer and “an incompetent idiot” for the federal government’s slow response to HIV/AIDS. Fauci’s comment on Kramer, “Once you got past the rhetoric you found that Larry Kramer made a lot of sense and that he had a heart of gold.” Another like Kramer will not come along anytime soon.

LGBT D.C. offices trashed in riot Peaceful protestors on the weekend following the death of George Floyd in Minneapolis, trashed and set fire to some Washington D.C. office buildings. One of those buildings peacefully trashed and burned was the AFL-CIO headquarters. Housed in that building was “Pride at Work,” formed to represent queer people and allies with support from the labor movement.

The organization was formed in 1994 and become part of the AFL-CIO in 1997.

Connecticut loses to cisgender girls A letter from the U.S. Department of Education Civil Rights Office told the state of Connecticut its policy allowing transgender girls to compete against cisgender girls in high school sports violates

the civil rights of athletes who have always identified as female. The ruling was responding to a complaint filed last year by several cisgender female track athletes who argued that two transgender female runners had an unfair physical advantage. State policy allows the competition, but the Feds claim the policy is a violation of Title IX, the federal civil rights law that guarantees equal education opportunities for women, including in athletics.

Grenell steps down Former acting Director of National Intelligence, Richard Grenell, conducted the swearing-in of his successor as the permanent DNI and resigned as the U.S. Ambassador to Germany. Grenell was the first out gay man to hold a cabinet position in U.S. history. As DNI, he pushed initiatives in the intelligence services to reform recruitment and training of LGBT employees. During his two years in Germany, he led an international initiative to “decriminalize homosexuality” in countries where it is still criminalized. At the swearing-in of the new DNI, the president he worked for called him a “Superstar” and presented him with the traditional “cabinet room chair.”

Trump rolls back trans health protections The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services’ Office of Civil Rights moved to roll back Obama-era protections for transgender people under the Affordable Care Act, which bans discrimination in healthcare. Some health professionals fear the new HHS rule could make it more difficult to advance care for the transgender community. Q

QSaltLake replaces the trees we use.

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The paper mill we buy our paper from plants a new tree for every tree they use. But that wasn’t enough for us.

We have partnered with the National Forest Foundation to plant an additional tree for every tree used to produce QSaltLake Magazine.

So, for every tree we use, TWO trees are planted.

Fires, insects and disease outbreaks are jeopardizing the majestic trees that grow in our forests from Maine to California. That’s why we have joined the National Forest Foundation’s ambitious effort to plant 50 million trees across our National Forests by 2023.

The National Forest Foundation is investing in healthy forests for today and for future generations. With QSaltLake’s help, they will restore tens of thousands of acres of wildlife habitat, from the longleaf pine forests of Florida to the cedar groves of Alaska.

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Utah Pride Center announces second ‘restructuring’ The first week of May, the Utah Pride Center announced a restructuring, reducing their paid staff by 40 percent. On June 11 they announced a second round and a new vision for what their structure will look like moving forward.

“After the events of the last few days, weeks and months, and with the uncertain economic and social future we are all facing, we know that our world and our Center is not, and can never be, the same place that it was just a few months ago. Community spaces, like our Utah Pride Center, are all confronting this contemporary reality in different ways. One of the impacts of COVID-19 has been the need to carefully and deliberately consider the structure of the organization,” leaders wrote in a statement.

Under the new structure, several positions were eliminated — the Pride Festival director, which was held by Hillary McDaniel; donor development manager, held by Michael Bryant; and bookkeeper, who was Bek Birkett.

New positions include an associate executive director, and a youth and family services manager. There has not been an announcement on who will fill those positions.

The associate executive director will focus on the day-to-day management of the Center’s vision and strategy, according to the statement.

“This new role will focus on ensuring that we are a community-facing and serving organization, and will be tasked with measuring how we are meeting and evaluating both strategic and operational tasks of our departments, as well as help with our fundraising and sponsorship initiatives,” the statement read.

The youth and family services manager will focus on at-risk young people and assist the director of youth and family programs, currently Amanda Darrow, in developing youth programming and resources, particularly counseling and social services.

“The demand for our youth and family services has steadily increased. Our young people and parents need an expanded, qualified, and supportive team,” the statement read.

“Due to the changes in the [Utah Pride] Festival for 2020, and the opportunity to shift to the structure explained above, there will no longer be one Pride Festival director.

These duties will be shared by the new Executive Pride Festival Committee.

That committee will be made up of seven members, including UPC leadership, board

members and engaged community members who will drive the planning and decision making.

“This new structure draws on the more cooperative and collaborative way that the Pride Festival was planned in the past and yet positions the Center for the future in that it does not place the burden of the Pride Festival and fundraising on one person’s shoulders, and there is an increased ability to adapt to change,” the statement continued.

“In this time of COVID-19, we know that our financial health and wellbeing are paramount. The Center needs to ensure that our financial statements and reports are accurate, and adhere to professional accounting procedures. In the interim, the board treasurer [Chris Decaria] will be an ‘acting’ CFO for the Pride Center. They will oversee the transition and outsourcing of this important role to a CPA (or equivalent).”

Controversy The announcement is not without controversy. Social media posts are pointing to this and the earlier staff reductions as retaliation against those who have raised concerns about how the Center is managed.

“It made no business sense to cut the roles and fire the employees that had the strongest hand not only in serving the community but also in ensuring that much-needed money could continue flowing into our non-profit,” wrote Brim Custen, former marketing and media coordinator at UPC whose position was terminated in early May. “I knew that there was a history of personal bias between myself and the executive director [Rob Moolman], and I am certain that it had more than a little influence over the decision to terminate my employment. I know that similar biases motivated the termination of other roles in the organization as well.”

“But then the new restructure announcement came out today … I learned that every last fundraising and financial role had been terminated, along with the role of the festival director. I know that executive director also had tensions and personal reasons to fire the individuals who held those roles,” Custen continued.

At least one current employee came to the Center’s defense.

“Please understand the claims being made, shared, do not include all the facts,” counters Joni Weiss, who does web design and devel-

opment for UPC. “Take whatever you hear (including this) with suspicion. Just know that you don’t know the facts about these former employees. I work here at the Pride Center and I still trust board members (some of whom that I’ve known for years) and I have no reason to distrust Rob.” Moolman sent out a statement addressing the posts.

“The vital resources of the Utah Pride Center have to be ensured. The reaction to these decisions is understandable as the have caused much pain,” he wrote. “There is a perception that we are not fulfilling our roles as good guardians of the Center. It is in this period of uncertain and crazy time that that role is being taken more seriously than ever before.”

“I am, and have always been, available to anyone who truly seeks to hear and understand what has happened, and will always demand that we are a transparent and ethical organization,” he concluded.

A number of community leaders have supported the Center’s new plan. Those statements are available here.

Facebook group takeover Affected former employees went so far as to take over the Center’s Facebook group, Utah Pride Center Lobby which was created as a space for Center clients to virtually meet once it had to close because of the Coronavirus. They have relabeled it to the “Unofficial Utah Pride Center Lobby” and posted screenshots that depict executive director Rob Moolman removing posts and people from the group.

Pride Center staff said the removals were an unintentional mistake.

“The Utah Pride Center social media team was using the credentials of Rob Moolman, who was an administrator. There was initial confusion over altering members’ administrative access on the center page, which resulted in inadvertently removing them from the group,” a post on the Center’s Facebook page read. “We do not wish to silence any members of our community. We have worked to fix this error and will continue to strive to do better. Currently, the Utah Pride Center Lobby group is not owned or able to be administrated by the Utah Pride Center or its staff.”

As this story is published, a meeting between existing staff and volunteers and organizational leaders is taking place via Zoom, so Moolman and board president Mona Stevens were unavailable for comment. We will update this story as it develops.

The plan for the restructure can be found at utahpridecenter.org/upc-strategic-restructuring-plan/ Q

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Supreme Court rules LGBTQ workers are protected by the Civil Rights Act The Supreme Court issued a landmark decision June 15 that Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964 does, indeed, protect LGBTQ workers from discrimination. The ruling, written by conservative Trump appointee Justice Neil Gorsuch says that “An employer who fires an individual merely for being gay or transgender violates Title VII.” “Today, we must decide whether an employer can fire someone simply for being homosexual or transgender. The answer is clear. An employer who fires an individual for being homosexual or transgender fires that person for traits or actions it would not have questioned in members of a different sex. Sex plays a necessary and undisguisable role in the decision, exactly what Title VII forbids,” the decision reads.

“Those who adopted the Civil Rights Act might not have anticipated their work would lead to this particular result.

Likely, they weren’t thinking about many of the Act’s consequences that have become apparent over the years, including its prohibition against discrimination on the basis of motherhood or its ban on the sexual harassment of male employees.”

“But the limits of the drafters’ imagination supply no reason to ignore the law’s demands,” Gorsuch continued. “When the express terms of a statute give us one answer and extratextual considerations suggest another, it’s no contest. Only the written word is the law, and all persons are entitled to its benefit.”

Justices Breyer, Ginsburg, Kagan, Roberts, and Sotomayor joined Gorsuch in the ruling.

Three cases that argued Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964, which bans job discrimination “because of sex” applied to LTBTQ people were heard by the Court in 2019.

Two of the cases, Altitude Express, Inc. v. Zarda and Bostock v. Clayton County, Georgia, involved discrimination against gay men and one, R.G. & G.R. Harris Funeral Homes v. EEOC & Aimee Stephens was brought by a transgender person.

Lawyers for the LGBTQ plaintiffs, as well as civil rights groups, argued that

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discrimination based on gender identity and sexual orientation involves discrimination because of sex, because a worker is getting treated differently for things that would be acceptable for someone of different sex.

The plaintiffs also argued that LGBTQ people defy sex stereotypes like “men and women marry people of the opposite sex” and “people assigned male or female at birth identify as men and women.”

The ACLU celebrated the decision.

programs. Congress must affirm today’s decision and update our laws to ensure comprehensive and explicit protections for LGBTQ people and all people who face discrimination.”

The Trump administration argued that Title VII does not at all address LGBTQ people and that the 1964 Congress did not want the bill to include LGBTQ people. They further argued that it should be up to Congress to pass LGBTQ discrimination protections.

Donald Trump opposes the Equality Act, which would amend the Civil Rights Act of 1964 to clearly provide consistent and explicit non-discrimination protections for LGBTQ people across key areas

“This is a huge victory for LGBTQ equality. Over 50 years ago, Black and Brown trans women, drag queens, and butch lesbians fought back against police brutality and discrimination that too many LGBTQ people still face. The Supreme Court’s clarification that it’s unlawful to fire people because they’re LGBTQ is the result of decades of advocates fighting for our rights. The court has caught up to the majority of our country, which already knows that discriminating against LGBTQ people is both unfair and against the law,” James Esseks, director of the ACLU’s LGBTQ & HIV Project, said. “Our work is not done.

There are still alarming gaps in federal civil rights laws that leave people — particularly Black and Brown LGBTQ people — open to discrimination in businesses open to the public and taxpayer-funded

of life, including employment, housing, credit, education, public spaces and services, federally funded programs, and jury service.

“The story of our nation is one of a relentless march toward greater justice and greater equality for all people,” former Vice President and presumptive Democratic presidential candidate, Joe Biden said. “Fifty years ago this month, the first Pride march took place in New York City as a protest — as a call for liberation. Today, by affirming that sexual orientation and gender identity discrimination are prohibited under Title VII of the Civil Rights Act, the Supreme Court has confirmed the simple but profoundly American idea that every human being should be treated with respect and dignity. That everyone should be able to live openly, proudly, as their true selves without fear.” Q

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Equality Utah celebrates SCOTUS victory, reminds of the work ahead “We are overwhelmed with joy today. The U.S. Supreme Court has ruled that companies no longer have the right to discriminate against LGBTQ Americans in the workplace,” wrote Equality Utah Executive Director Troy Williams in a statement. “Five years ago SCOTUS recognized what is self-evident — that LGBTQ Americans are entitled to equality. Today SCOTUS acknowledged that LGBTQ Americans are legally protected from employment discrimination.”

“As we celebrate this major victory, we recognize that it comes in the midst of a global pandemic and at a moment when our state and nation are grappling with both the legal and cultural systems of racism.

So yes, today we celebrate and cheer, and tomorrow we get back to work,” Williams continued. “While LGBTQ people across the country now have legal protections from discrimination at work, we still have a long way to go.”

Williams noted several things that still remain to end discrimination against the LGBTQ community.

“Last Friday the Trump Administration moved to strip protections for transgender Americans from the Affordable Care Act. This is an immoral and unconscionable act as COVID-19 continues to spike across the country. We must work to ensure that every member of our community can access medical care without fear of discrimination,” he wrote.

Williams pointed out that in Utah and in many states across the nation, it is still legal for stores, restaurants, and hotels to discriminate against LGBTQ people, because no public accommodations law exists.

He also noted that it is legal for federally funded programs, including hospitals, colleges,

and adoption agencies to discriminate against LGBTQ people. Transgender people lack the legal backing to use the restroom of their gender.

He also noted that, without an equal rights amendment for women, it is legal to discriminate against women in public accommodations and federally funded programs.

“Utah has made incredible strides forward, but 29 states still do not have basic protections,” Williams wrote. “We need Congress to fully protect LGBTQ people from discrimination and pass the Equality Act to ensure federal non-discrimination protections.”

He also addressed the issues of race that are the subject of rallies around the world.

“Yesterday, LGBTQ Utahns marched in solidarity with Black Lives Matter. We were honored to support the voices of Black Queer Transgender People of Color,” he wrote.

“Our state and our nation, at every level, needs to address the racism that perpetuates discrimination and violence against Black people — and all people of color, including those who are LGBTQ — even when such discrimination and violence are formally prohibited by law.”

“Even with today’s decision, Black LGBTQ people will still face disproportionate discrimination across their lives,” he continued. “Until our laws remedy systemic racism and inequality, and our culture catches up to those laws, our movement’s pursuit of LGBTQ equality is far from done.”

Williams noted that this victory is “sorely needed after a brutal four months” and is a tribute to the work of our community.

“Today is a powerful reminder of what we as a community can accomplish, and how much work is left to do.” Q

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Encircle ‘Love’ billboards launched on I-15 in Draper and Lehi Since June 1, messages of hope and love for LGBTQ people are being displayed on I-15 from Draper to Lehi after an incident where a banner with the words “No Sides, Only Love” was vandalized in Orem in January.

Encircle, a Utah organization supporting LGBTQ+ youth, launched the billboards in part out of concern that Utah’s LGBTQ+ youth may be feeling isolated these days.

In January, a man parked near the fence between a home and Timpanogos High School where two banners were hung, one from Encircle which read “No Sides, Only Love,” and the other a suicide prevention banner from the Trevor Project, reading “You Are Never Alone.”

In the wake of multiple suicides at their neighboring high school, Orem parents Brenda and Thomas had hung the banners to show support for their LGBTQ+ child, community, and friends.

The incident was caught on a surveillance camera but was not enough to identify the person who vandalized the banner.

“I wonder how often he has not felt accepted himself to be able to hate other people he doesn’t know,” Brenda told KUTV News at the time.

The couple also made headlines last summer when five of their rainbow Pride Flags were stolen from their yard near Timpanogos High School.

The parents then decided to do something positive about the most recent incident. They started a campaign to put the message of the destroyed banner on billboards throughout Utah.

The parents set up a fundraising campaign to raise $15,000 so Encircle could

put up billboards with the message.

Two banners were created by R&R Partners — “Imagine what love can do.” and “No sides, only love.”

ENCIRCLE BILLBOARDS LOCATIONS ALONG I-15

Five digital billboards will stream the messages along I-15. Northbound at about 142nd South near Boondocks in Draper, southbound at Point of the Mountain, southbound in Alpine across from the Adobe offices, north- and southbound in Lehi at about 800 North, and north- and southbound in Lehi at Pioneer Crossing/Main Street.

Two static billboards will also be visible southbound in Alpine on the east side of the freeway.

One donor, Jaden Christenen, said he wanted to be part of the campaign because Encircle helped him in his coming out process in Utah County.

“I was born and raised in Utah, and my coming out was rocky,” Christensen said.

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“Encircle supported me and helped me figure out who I was. They pointed me to resources like therapy and provided support groups.”

Christensen wanted to become more active and involved.

“All of that pushed me to get more involved in human rights and LGBTQ community, including LoveLoud and other events.”

The banner being vandalized in January deeply affected him.

“It hurt me because it’s really just a message of love. We’re not trying to overstep other people’s boundaries and beliefs,” he said. “Seeing that ripped down on her own property really hurt me. That school had experienced a number of suicides and she was offering up encouragement and support for the students.”

Christensen believes the phrase “No sides, only love” resonates with those in Utah County.

“I’ve had the opportunity to be in Utah County to see how really a phrase like ‘No sides only love’ invokes thought and separates people’s beliefs with treating people with kindness,” he said. “I’m looking forward to seeing how people will react.”

Christensen also believes that the banners may be coming at a particularly poignant time.

“We are in divided times right now and this message of love for all humans is a perfect way to address that,” he said. “No sides only love isn’t just for the LGBT community. It should be used for everyone. It isn’t just an LGBT issue on nonacceptance. People of color, people with disabilities. There’s a lot of hate in the world and I’m thankful these billboards are going up now.”

Maybe even most importantly, Christensen said, “I don’t think they will be able to take it down.” Q Encircle is at encircletogether.org

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IMC worker charged with sexual abuse of transgender patient A patient care technician at Intermountain Medical Center, 34-year-old Jonathon Paul Jankowski, has been charged with sexually assaulting a transgender patient.

Jankowski, of Saratoga Springs, was charged June 10 in 3rd District Court with object rape, a first-degree felony.

According to charging documents, an IMC patient needed to use the restroom and requested a bedpan and assistance due to an injury.

“Jankowski threw the bedpan on the floor and left it there stating it was not his job,” the charges state. The patient retrieved the bedpan and asked for assistance after using it. Jankowski refused, saying it was “disgusting,” according to the charges.

The documents say Jankowski eventually helped, getting fecal matter “all over” the patient and then yelling at them, “blaming him for the mess.”

Later, as the patient tried to sleep, Jankowski allegedly sat on the patient’s bed and asked if he could show them a small note. He then taped a pen to the patient’s leg, kissed the patient on the mouth, and inappropriately touched the patient’s genitals, according to charging documents.

IMC released a statement: “Intermountain is committed to patient safety and this type of allegation is taken very seriously. Upon learning of these allegations, Mr. Jankowski was immediately suspended and then terminat-

ed at the conclusion of our investigation. We are fully cooperating with law enforcement. We have zero tolerance for any kind of inappropriate contact.”

“It is scary and it’s alarming and it’s something we deal with way too often in our community,” Sue Robbins with the Transgender Advisory Council for Equality Utah said. “In a medical and healthcare environment, we shouldn’t be worrying about our safety when we are at our weakest. And we worry about our safety every day, so we need to change that.”

“According to the 2015 NTCE Transgender Survey, 47 percent of the respondents stated they had been victims of sexual assault at one time in their life, Robbins said.

“Based on what we were presented, we filed one count of object rape as a first-degree felony, which is a very serious allegation, and we feel very comfortable with the charges we filed,” Salt Lake County District Attorney Sim Gill said. “We will continue to gather information and we will continue to look at to see if there are any other allegations or anything in addition to that” “This should not happen to anyone, especially to a person who is transgender, and we want them to know that we will do our very best to hold the offender accountable,” Gill said. Q

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JULY, 2020

Utah GOP gubernatorial candidates talk LGBTQ with Equality Utah Before primary ballots were mailed to voters, Equality Utah held a candidate forum, interviewing the four Republican GOP candidates on LGBTQ issues. The 80-minute video is at the end of our story at qsaltlake.com.

To help you make your voting choice, QSaltLake Magazine has chosen moments during the forum.

Spencer Cox Williams: So everybody is on a journey; very few people are static in their beliefs and their views.

I’m curious about your personal journey, thinking about LGBT issues. Talk about your evolution.

Cox: So, I shared some of this publicly. This piece maybe not as much. A real important inflection point for me came when I was running for office eight years ago to get into the [Utah] House of Representatives. A friend of mine, a reporter — remember I come from a small rural place — came up to me and we had a very important conversation.

He said, since you’re going to get elected, you need to know something. He came out to me that night and said, “I want you to think very carefully about me when you are making

those decisions.” It was kind of a stunning moment for two reasons — one I didn’t know he was gay, and two, I hadn’t thought much about it from a policy standpoint. While the starting point [of his growth on LGBT issues] was much earlier, that was a leaping point.

Through this process of public service, I have had the opportunity to meet some just amazing people in the state who shared their stories with me. I think that is what makes it real, is part of that journey.

I’ve said before, on civil rights issues, you know people don’t wake up one morning and become a different race or have a child of a different race.

That takes time. People do wake up all the time and find out that someone they care deeply about, a family member or a friend or someone, is part of the LGBTQ community, and that starts to change their perspective. So it really is about relationships, for me and for most people.

Williams asked about what Cox will do if elected governor to help with the suicide crisis, saying Utah’s suicide rate has risen 141 percent in 10 years.

Cox: The legislature has passed more mental health legislation over the past couple of years than probably the rest of the history of the state combined.

We’re putting real dollars toward suicide prevention.

The Safe Utah app has been a really important piece of that. The mobile crisis outreach teams that we’re working on, and then just changing the culture around these issues is going to do more than anything else.

When people feel included and when people have a

connection. I’ve often said the opposite of addiction is not sobriety. The opposite of addiction is connection. The same thing is true with mental health issues. Our LGBTQ communities, when they feel welcome when they feel like they have a place … that’s going to save more lives than really anything else we can do.

Williams: The Pulse massacre was devastating for our community, and to have an elected official [Spencer Cox] stand up and show empathy and compassion was huge. I had a friend in India who saw your speech on the news in India. So it had an impact across the globe, you know, that a Republican would step forward and show love and compassion toward the LGBT community then that’s beautiful.

Cox: Well, there are two sides to that. One is how crazy it is that a no-name politician from Utah, the lieutenant governor, would get that kind of attention from all around the world. We received messages from all over the world; from Chile, Great Britain, Russia, everywhere. These messages that were coming in were very positive and yet I think it gave license to people because what I heard over and over again was, “thank you for saying what I feel. I’ve just never figured out how to articulate them,” and those are the moments that matter.

I’ll tell you the best part

of that was after this speech, for like an hour and a half, people just came and shared their stories. And, they were heartbreaking, there were a lot of tears about people who had been rejected by their families or others, but most importantly, it was a moment of healing. We need more of those moments.

Williams asked about hearing transgender voices in a Cox administration.

Cox: My job as governor, the kind of person I am, is bringing everybody together and listening to their voices. I have had that opportunity with many in the transgender community to come and talk to us multiple times, and it’s really fascinating and heartbreaking at times to have those conversations and understand what they’ve gone through. And so yes, they’re part of our state. They’re an important part of our state, and they deserve to be brought to the table.

Williams asked if the Republican party will eventually expand to include LGBTQ people.

Cox: Absolutely. It’s not only in the future but in the past.

We do have members of the LGBTQ community who are Republicans. We haven’t done a great job of being inclusive and broadening the tent, but some of us are trying really hard, and there’s a reason for that. The Republican party is the party of civil rights. I mean, it’s the party of Lincoln. That’s where it starts. It’s the party of women’s

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suffrage. We’ve forgotten that.

The party of Lincoln stands for lifting the individual, giving an opportunity to everyone. I’m protecting those who are most vulnerable, giving a voice to those who don’t have a voice, and making sure that they can enjoy the American Dream. I would like nothing more than for the Republican party to be the place where the LGBTQ community feels comfortable, where they feel like they can have success, and where they feel like they can be represented.

Jon M. Huntsman, Jr. Williams: How did you get to the to a place where your heart opened to our community?

Huntsman: An overriding philosophy for me, as a human being and as an elected official, has always been equality under the law. So as a Republican, I thought that’s what Abraham Lincoln always stood for — equality under the law. Not for some but for all.

I grew up in North Hollywood, California, when my dad worked for his uncles in the egg business. You couldn’t help, even as a young kid, noticing the tectonic shifts that were happening socially within the LGBTQ community and the discussions that were ensuing.

It was a fertile time, politically, and I carry those impressions with me through life. And then you find yourself in a neighborhood in Salt Lake, and you have a gay neighbor — a friend

— who comes to you one day and says my partner died and I was not able to visit him in the hospital, and I was like, what is going on here? I had another friend, who was a name widely recognized, whose son passed tragically and he asked me to speak at the funeral, which I did. I had just been elected governor at the time, and I made mention publicly of him and his partner who were there in attendance, and the tears streamed because he had never heard those words. Particularly from a governor, and I thought it was just the right thing to do. You know, it is equality under the law.

I have a niece who’s gay. I have a running mate, Michelle Kaufusi, whose daughter is gay.

She actually married them in Provo. They are part of a family and a part of our community.

With each step along the way, I would look at the deficiencies in terms of how we treat some communities as compared to others, and it really grated at me as an American who believes in freedom and liberty for all and equality under the law. So that’s what informed me most of all in my journey, and I had the good fortune of having friends when I was elected governor.

One friend and I’ll name him — Gordon Storrs.

He became a great friend during the campaign. As we were campaigning, he and his partner came in and said, “We really want to support you,” and I said I’d love to have you.

“He then said, you know we’re gay.” and I said, “Come on in, we’re open to everybody.” He would come into my office as the newly elected governor, and take the time to sit, just one-on-one, and say, “I want you to understand some issues through my eyes. And I want you to understand my journey.

It was the first time that I really sat down, in a political context, and had that conversation with somebody like Gordon,

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and I’m forever grateful to him and the education he brought me. I just listened and learned, and I tried to put myself in his shoes. It was transformational, and it showed the power of information, knowledge, education, sharing stories, and experiences. I think that’s been an important part of the journey for all of us.

Williams asked Huntsman why, back in 2009, he supported Equality Utah’s Common Ground Initiative that provided protections for LGBTQ families, as well as civil unions. “This was six years before it actually passed in as law here in the state. That’s a political risk for you. Why did you do it?”

Huntsman: Because I felt it was the right thing to do and I had enough conversations and enough interaction with friends In the LGBTQ community to help me understand their journeys, their needs, and a heightened need for equality in our state. It bothered me, until we got to full equality, particularly on marriage. We were deficient and, although I couldn’t come right out and say marriage equality, I wanted to support a very important incremental step that would get people talking about it. And I thought, when a governor announces something, it opens the floodgates.

Some people say it’s never a positive thing to lead out on issues — everybody follows — because there’s a lot of pain that you have to endure. And I look back on the commentary and the hate mail I received. I remember what people in my own office, now in power, said about it. And I kept a couple of letters in my drawer that were the most hate-filled letters I’ve ever received. I tried to again put myself in the shoes of those in the [LGBTQ] community who have to endure this kind of thing and did, particularly in the early days and some still do, and I would pull the letters

out every now and again, from respectable people, and I would reread them just to be reminded of what hate can be. And it reinforced me. It gave me greater resolve to carry on and do the right thing. So I was alone. I didn’t have a lot of allies at the time, but I know in my heart it was the right thing to do Williams asked Huntsman if it surprised him to know that a poll showed Utah as being the second-highest state in the country to agree with LGBTQ protection laws.

Huntsman: It does not, because of the goodness of the hearts and souls of people in the state.

Once people understand, once there is a thorough discussion, people have big hearts.

Williams asked if Huntsman will meet with the transgender community, to get to know them, their lives, and their struggles.

Huntsman: Of course I will.

I will do exactly for the “T” community what I have done for all other communities.

It’s a listening ear, and it’s an ultimate goal and philosophy of equality under the law.

Greg Hughes Williams asked, “In 2015 we came to you and said, ‘Hey, we want some help passing a nondiscrimination law, and the LGBTQ community steps up, and you welcomed us into the house.

Hughes: Absolutely. And this is the issue — it was a very broad approach. I’ve tried to at least

16 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | VOTER GUIDE

not put people into categories, and if we were trying to get some good public policy accomplished, that could be broadly approached, and treat each other like a two-way street, just like the Golden Rule, I was excited to do it.

It was good to see that it was other people that had not typically wanted to come together to find common ground was doing it. So I jumped all over it.

I was happy to do it. And that was a big moment.

I’m actually surprised since we all came together that way, why we haven’t seen that as a stronger national template nationally, or even talk about it much in our state now. I wish we would because I thought there was a lot of unity that was felt.

Williams: Before that, when issues that really impacted the LGBTQ community were being debated, we were never really at the table. But that changed after 2015 and it’s been good since then as we work through other difficult issues like hate crimes.

We would hope to see in the Hughes Administration moving forward is the same relationship when issues impact our community, we’re at the table working through them together.

Hughes: And you would, because we’ve taken some very disparate groups, and it’s easy to be keyboard warriors in 2020, it’s easy to throw out insults or to kind of stay in your circle of people and maybe be disparaging. But when you get people in a room together and you get to start looking at what others, you know people start to be more respectful and then that’s where you start to find common ground.

Williams: What kind of policies and messages would you like to send out to young people who are struggling with suicidal thoughts?

Hughes: This is a tough one. So we did some things in the legislature with the Safe UT app,

and now we have principals of high schools reaching out to students, even on the weekend, if that app lets them know that there’s a student or child struggling. So we’re trying very hard to address this issue.

I’m struggling, as an old school guy. I’m having a hard time understanding what’s happening. Years ago I would have said just “you got to toughen up. If you’re going through this, it’s because you don’t have enough to worry about.” I had these ideas in my head that it was maybe society, that it’s too soft or too affluent. I know that’s wrong.

But what if it’s technology; if it’s these social issues that kids are grappling with? It scares me as a dad.

Williams: So say that there’s an LGBTQ kid who feels like a misfit. “I don’t fit in.” What message as governor do you want to send to that kid?

Hughes: Well, I tell them what I tell my friends that are gay.

I say, man, you are my friend.

That is the bottom line. We are about relationships and how we hold our relationships as people.

That’s the most important thing of all. Everything else is ancillary to that. If someone is going through issues in their life, it can’t get so scary or so dark that they think it would interrupt those family relationships or relationships with friends.

I think in 2020, we’re starting to understand those things.

We have to give each other space to have our faith, our religious beliefs. I believe if we all give each other that, and that’s a two-way street, I think we’re going to be okay.

Williams: Did you know that the US military is the single largest employer of transgender Americans in the country? Since 2017 they’ve been banned from serving in the military. So, as governor, would you go with me to the VA hospital and meet with transgender veterans and

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hear their stories and let them talk to you about their service?

Hughes: A hundred percent. So this goes back to the last question. The key is, they’re veterans.

They served their country. They served to protect the freedoms that we have in this country. I would never put different distinctions that would make one veteran different from another veteran. I want to reach out to all veterans. If you’re a veteran, I’m your advocate. I’m your friend, and that’s the beginning and end of it.

On a lighter note, Williams jokingly asked Hughes his favorite gay man crush between former Sen. Jim Dabakis or Tiger King’s Joe Exotic.

Hughes: “Argh! So here’s the deal: the premise of gay crush, so I’m still a little homophobic, I’m just a little old school here so, who do I admire the most?

Man, I just watched that Tiger King, and I could not be more amused. I just thought that was the funniest show. It was just so fun to watch him, but I gotta go with Jim Dabakis, Jim has been my pal. We’ve had so much fun working on issues together. We fight when it’s time to fight, but it’s never personal. I think we’ve done some important things together. So, he’s my guy.

Thomas Wright Williams: You were the Salt Lake County Republican chair during 2009–2011. We were at political odds, there were debates and protests, but what I remem-

ber about you at the time is that you were willing to kind of come forward to meet our community and actively engaged us. Why? Wright: Because I believe in equality. I believe that we’re all created equal, and we all have the right to pursue happiness the way that we see fit, and you know what? My greatest memories of being the Utah Republican party chairman was leaving the debate between Mia Love and Jim Matheson at KSL News radio, and I walked from there to the Salt Palace Convention Center and attended the Allies dinner. And remember when I walked in, everyone was kind of talking and whispering and there I was and it just never occurred to me that that that was a big deal.

I say this all the time: one of my best friends from all of my political services is Jim Dabakis. He was the Democratic chairman when I was a Republican chairman. We traveled the state together, made appearances together. Stephen [Justesen, Dabakis’ husband] and Caroline [Fuller, Wright’s wife] have become friends, and we’ve spent time together. And, you know, it’s very unlikely, but we’ve never had a cross word. We don’t agree on all the issues. We don’t agree on all the policies, but we’ve never had a cross word, we’ve never had that awkward moment because we just know what we each believe, but we’re very respectful of each other, and that’s what we need more of.

Williams: How do we do that?

How do we expand the Republican tent so that LGBTQ people feel comfortable being there?

Wright: Just love. Listening and love.

Williams: That’s a radical idea.

Wright: A little, maybe, but you know for me it’s about us loving people more than we love our political opinions.

Let’s start with people. Let’s try

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to meet people on their ground and say, “you know what? I want to understand you better.

Will you understand me better? Let’s listen to each other; let’s love each other. Look, Troy, life is short. During this pandemic, haven’t we learned what should be our priorities?

It’s given us an opportunity to reset and to really think about what’s important in our lives and those relationships that are really important. You’re not going to take your political ideologies with you, but kindness and love last forever.

Especially now, like look at the mental health challenges our state faces. The suicide rate, we’re number one in the suicide rate for teenagers. We need to stop and just talk to people, just hear them.

Williams: We do know that since 2011 suicide rates for young people have spiked 141 percent. We don’t have data on how many of those identify as LGBTQ, but we do know from national data that our community is disproportionately more likely to attempt suicide.

So what kind of policies will the Wright administration implement?

Wright: We have to declare war on mental health in the state of Utah. I’m not comfortable with Utah being number one for teenage suicide. I’m not comfortable with having too few mental healthcare professionals.

We have a real opportunity with 150,000 Utahns having filed for unemployment to retrain them. I know a lot of them would love to be mental healthcare experts. We need them in rural Utah, we need them in urban Utah, and we need to make sure that people can get help. There’s nothing wrong with having a mental illness. Nobody chooses it. You know, nobody chooses physical ailments. Nobody chooses mental ailments. We just need to get help, and we need to be treated,

and we need those professionals ready to go. That’s number one.

Number two, we need to let our young people know nothing’s wrong with them. We love them just the way they are. Just come to us as you are. We will accept you. As governor, I want to talk about mental health and LGBTQ issues, just to destigmatize them. Talk about them more, and I think the more conservatives talk about those issues that we find common ground and we can meet each other in a safe place, and we can tell our youth there’s nothing wrong with them.

Williams: Right. So if there’s an LGBTQ youth who’s struggling and looks to you as governor, what message do you want them to hear from you?

Wright: That we love them.

That they’re safe in Utah. That we want them here. That they are productive members of society that they’re no different than anybody else. And that I want to learn from them and I want to listen to them and that they don’t need to go anywhere else and they don’t need to be anybody different.

They just need to be who they are and that Governor Wright loves them.

Williams: Let’s talk about the Republican elephant in the room. You’re running mate is Rep. Rob Bishop. He has a zero percent rating on the HRC Congressional scorecard. If you win, there’s going to be a lot of LGBTQ Utahns who are going to be really really suspicious that they, perhaps, won’t be welcome in your administration.

Wright: Well, look, I’m going to be the governor. Rob is my running mate, and he’s lieutenant governor. Rob is a good man. He’s a decent man.

I’ve gotten to know him well, so I want people to know that about him. You know he has a record, and he should be asked those questions directly.

Those are fair game. But I’m

the governor. You know where I stand; you know I’m an ally.

You know how strong I am on these issues of equality and making sure that we see eyeto-eye and that we’re working together.

Wiliams: I’m curious, as the next governor of Utah, will you be willing to meet with transgender leaders, transgender youth and hear their stories and learn their struggles, and when issues arise related to that community, will you have them at the table with you?

Wright: Absolutely. That’s a great question. I think I said

H

earlier I want to be a governor for all, and that includes the “T.” And I mean that and when I’m governor, anybody would be welcome to come in and have a seat at the table and talk and let’s see what we can find in common. Let’s see what we can agree on, but let’s understand each other, and let’s love each other.

I really believe that love can change everything. Q The full video can be found at the end of this story at qsaltlake.com. Equality Utah has also interviewed Democratic candidate for governor, Chris Peterson, which will be in the next issue of this magazine. Equality Utah is at equalityutah.org.

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views

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quotes On the U.S. Supreme Court’s ruling that LGBTQ people are covered under the Civil Rights Act of 1964:

“There’s no place in our country for discriminating against an employee on the basis of sex,” he said. “Utah was a leader in outlawing workplace and housing discrimination against LGBTQ individuals and now the high court has ruled those protections are the law of the land.”

—Rep. Ben McAdams, D-Utah

“I wish that decision would have been reached by Congress rather than the court.”

—Sen. Mitt Romney, R-Utah

“This court decision only highlights the importance of my Fairness For All Act. Religious freedom is protected by the First Amendment, but isn’t addressed in this case.

LGBT Americans are now protected under Title VII, but not elsewhere. My bill tackles those tough issues and provides answers for all Americans.”

—Rep. Chris Stewart, R-Utah

“I disagree with the Court’s decision today for the same reasons outlined by Justice Alito” —Sen. Mike Lee, R-Utah

“Before today, in more than half of states, LGBTQ+ people could get married one day and be fired from their job the next day under state law, simply because of who they are or who they love.”

—Sen. Joe Biden

JULY, 2020 | ISSUE 313 | Qsaltlake.com

guest editorial

Fix your ancestors’ racist past

BY AKIL PATTERSON

On Monday,

June 1, I was working to protect my city from outsiders who wanted to see our city burn like so many others. Many of them were young white individuals looking to start a revolution in a black town that would then get labeled thugs and terrorists.

As we began to wrap up the program, a group of younger college people came up to us and began to yell about how could we not give space to LGBTQ people at this protest, and as I tried to interject I kept getting cut off. Each time these young college students kept telling me what I had to do. The shocking part is all I wanted to say to them is that we did have LGBTQ people speak and that I can introduce them to all of them. Sadly that was not the intention of this group. Like so many others, they only want to see themselves or hear themselves because, well, because they are angry with society.

Nearly everything in my life has been about service to others since I got off cocaine some 10 years ago, and I enjoy fighting for causes, but I am tired of struggling to go and fight. We are the LGBTQ community playing the oppression Olympics against one another because we instinctively feel safe in spaces to think about only us.

We must recognize the trauma that we may cause transgender men and women

who are often not heard or who are beaten within an inch of their lives, black men who are arrested, shot, or murdered, trans black men and women who are killed, and yet we talk about who has it worse when it comes to our narratives. So what do some of our black trauma look like? Most times, it is the person you do not want to have sex with; it is the person you walk past, not even asking how they are doing.

It is walking into a bar and feeling like white people look at you like you are a freak. It is getting DMs on Facebook from white men who want you to breed them, and older women ask to see that BBC, and every time we have to smile.

It is time for the white LGBTQ community to stop the never-ending assault on others, because we stood with them when they yelled for marriage.

White brothers, sisters, and siblings, we do not ask your permission to grow. We are demanding that you learn that you cannot ignore our narratives anymore. No longer will you take our ideas and throw us pennies and say, “We have to worry about the image.” We are your partners in these movements and when you whitewash our identities as you did in the film Stonewall, you ignore the history and trauma of six generations of black people, the slaughter of Native American tribes and the marginalization of pain when you stole the lands of people who are brown.

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We could not vote for these laws you made, we could not speak for the injustices you created, and we were not allowed education to come up. Just because you have one black friend who is sexually attracted to white men does not mean that you have blanket immunity from the issues your ancestors created.

When we speak about systemic racism in this nation, it is not an attack on an individual; it is an attack on your ancestors who created laws that did not value black and brown bodies as humans to start. A negotiation reached, so slavery was not written into law, but somehow we needed the 13th amendment to be a whole person? We had no voice and no choice in the formation of this nation’s laws. They only built this nation on the backs of free labor and oppression.

What can you do to help rectify these actions of your family’s past? End qualified immunity for police, and start the practice of allowing community policing.

Start by funding black organizations with ethical practices. Find people who have nothing and help them come up with you. Reach back and grow communities and spread the wealth, and you will see less crime. Because last I checked, rich people only take from one another’s bank account, they tend not to take someone’s TV so that they can feed a child.

We must create a better world after COVID-19 — this is that chance the god or gods you follow have given us to hit the reset button, and it comes when they have forced you to bear witness to the horrors that black and brown people have been telling you for years that happen. Q Akil Patterson is a community activist, former All-State Athlete, and former candidate for Baltimore City Council.

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Racism

BY D’ANNE WITKOWSKI

I’m writing

this on June 1, the beginning of Pride month. Simultaneously, across the country people are protesting and tensions are escalating over the issue of racism.

This is, of course, related to Pride.

Many cite the Stonewall Riots in 1969 as the pivotal moment in the LGBTQ rights movement. You can only oppress people so much, abuse them for so long before they start to fight back.

We’ve had a problem with racism in the U.S. for over 400 years. Many police departments began as an effort to protect the system of slavery. The roots of this problem are deep.

I don’t condone violence. I don’t condone destruction. But I definitely think that police murdering a Black man is a much bigger deal than a police cruiser on fire, and if you don’t, well, you might be a racist.

There is so much hurt and anger in this country. And sadly we have no leader at the highest level of government. We have a white supremacist Twitter troll masquerading as the president. And he’s

creep of the month just making things worse. He’s urging state governments to respond violently.

He’s promoting the idea of shooting looters. To say he is incapable of leading is true, but he also doesn’t want to. The more chaos he can create, the better his chances are of reelection.

Trump and far too many in America don’t see racism as a problem, they see Black people and allies rising up against 400 years of oppression and violence and intimidation as the problem. Everything was fine so long as everybody pretended that everything was fine.

Remember when Colin Kaepernick dared to kneel next to the football field during the National Anthem in order to protest police brutality against Black people? That was a peaceful protest. And racists lost their minds. Trump called him a “son of a bitch.” Mike Pence walked out of an NFL game because kneeling players upset him so.

And, of course, these same racists are losing their minds about the much less peaceful protests happening across the country.

Remember how the very phrase “Black Lives Matter” upset so many white people, even some who would swear up and down that they don’t have a racist bone in their bodies as if racism is something that lives inside of a skeleton rather than a perpetual vehicle of violence that is always active even when it is silent? “ALL lives matter,” they said. White people literally took a protest against Black people being murdered and made it about themselves.

Many of these white people would likely say, “I don’t see race,” as if race is some kind of spectral aura rather than a defining characteristic in a country that devalues brown and black bodies. This isn’t Halloween. This is a 365-day, 24/7

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haunted house that we ask Black people to walk through every day, multiple times a day. And if they dare complain about it? Then we crank up the fear factor. We give police departments with a history of violence against citizens military-grade weaponry and gear. We give them tanks.

We say to then, “Go out and hurt the people who are pushing back against the hurt. Go hurt them more.”

And there is no correct way to protest this. The way the message is delivered isn’t the problem. It’s the refusal of those in power to hear that message, to keep ignoring Black voices, to spell out “La la la, I can’t hear you” with tear gas.

It is heartbreaking to see these protests happening right now because there is still a highly contagious and potentially deadly virus sweeping across the country. And yet we have, as a country, pushed people past the brink. You can’t see a virus. You can see a police officer kneel on a man’s neck until he dies. You can see white people protesting against public safety lockdowns with assault rifles, threatening to kill elected officials and having the police do nothing. You can see the very real and every day aggression of racism.

And so we have yet another crisis on top of yet another crisis and a president who doesn’t see either crisis as a problem.

In fact, Trump no doubt is thrilled about the protests taking place because he gets to act like a tough guy and urge violence against “thugs” and hope that this is enough to distract the country from the fact that well over 100,000 people have died in a matter of a few months from COVID-19.

There were people who said they voted for Trump because they were tired of “the system” and wanted to burn everything down and start over. This was, of course, supposed to be a metaphorical burning.

And yet, here we are.

It will take a lot of hard work, a lot of soul-searching, a lot of real change to actually address racism in America. As a country, we’ve risen to many challenges.

But this one is sinking us deep. Q D’Anne Witkowski is a poet, writer and comedian living in Michigan with her wife and son. She has been writing about LGBT politics for over a decade. Follow her on Twitter @MamaDWitkowski.

JULY, 2020 |

ISSUE 313 | Qsaltlake.com

guest editorial

Race and gender equality go hand in hand for Black LGBTQ people

BY TIQ MILAN

During

President Barack Obama’s town hall, “Reimagining Policing in the Wake of Continued Police Violence,” on June 3, he mentioned Tony McDade, the Black transgender man who was shot and killed by police in Tallahassee, Fla. It was a somber moment, but also one where many Black trans men felt seen.

Too often, the violence against Black transgender people at the hands of the police is ignored when, in fact, transgender people are seven times more likely to experience physical violence when interacting with the police than nontrans people, according to the National Coalition of Anti-Violence Programs.

And, according to a 2011 report from the National Center for Transgender Equality, nearly half of all Black transgender people have been incarcerated. This is a direct result of Black transgender people being marginalized within our own community and beyond. This movement for Black lives must include us too.

Not only have Black transgender people borne the brunt of the violent police system, we’ve fought against it as well. Black queers, from the civil rights leader Bayard Rustin, who helped organize the 1963 March on Washington, to the co-founders of Black Lives Matter, Patrisse Cullors, and Alicia Garza, have helped shape and organize some of the most effective strategies and movements for the equality of Black people.

Race and gender equality go hand in hand for Black LGBTQ people. We can’t pick only one kind of justice because to examine them both is too complicated or makes some us look at our own complacency. Transphobia and sexism are part of white supremacy, and so it all must go.

Trans voices cannot be silenced at this moment.

This current civil rights movement has engulfed all 50 states and some 18 countries so far; the heartbreaking death of George Floyd on May 25 while in the

custody of Minneapolis police pushed an already fragile global society over the proverbial edge. It’s easy to understand why.

Just over a month ago, COVID-19 had already ravaged the globe, infecting over 5.6 million people globally and killing more than 350,000. In the U.S., we were about to pass 100,000 deaths, and Black Americans were dying at three times the rate of whites. This administration’s response has been chaotic as best, best characterized by misinformation and decisions that appear to be solely for political gain, leaving millions weary, scared, and frustrated.

While the disease ran rampant through Black communities, we all watched in horror when, in early May, a video went viral that showed Ahmaud Arbery’s horrific killing in Brunswick, Georgia, in February; the two white men who killed him weren’t even charged until the video was released. On March 13, Breonna Taylor was shot in her bed by Louisville, Ky., police officers entering her house on a no-knock warrant seeking more evidence on a man already in custody. And then, May 25, there was George Floyd, begging for air and pleading for his mother, under the knee of a white police officer for 8 minutes and 46 seconds.

Black America snapped. White folks could no longer look away.

Then, as the world took to the streets, a recording of Iyanna Dior, a 23-year-old Black trans woman, being brutally attacked after a minor car accident on June 1 surfaced. The irony is that it happened in Minneapolis — the heart of the latest protest for Black lives. They didn’t attack her just because she is Black; they clearly attacked her because she’s transgender.

And it is was eerily similar to the case of Muhlaysia Booker, who was assaulted in Dallas, Texas by a group of men in 2019 after a car accident. A month later, she

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 21

was found shot to death; a different man was arrested.

This is the time for our progress to be intersectional and intergenerational; if not all of us, then none of us. All Black people deserve to be heard and be seen in this movement, and the Black identity of LGBTQ people isn’t exclusive of our trans and queerness. There can be no hierarchy created to determine which Black lives are more valuable than others.

All systemic violence and discrimination against Black people have to be examined.

We also have to be vulnerable enough to confront the ways in which transpho-

bia within the Black community sets the stage for violence and trauma. Too often, transgender people have been silenced when it comes to conversations about our lived experience with state-sanctioned violence, policing, and racism. The time to approach social justice in broader, more honest terms is now.

The murder of George Floyd was the last straw on top of countless losses and deep grievances for Black America.

We’re marching and demanding change, accountability, and racial equality ± all of which has long been overdue. But we can’t stop there. The change has to include the needs and voices of Black LGBTQ people, or we risk repeating the mistakes we’re rallying against now. The hope is that we get to the other side of the era of COVID-19 and global Black Lives Matter protests, better than how we came into it. But we’re only better together. Q Tiq Milan has been an advocate in the LGBT community for over a decade. He is also a writer and consultant who carved a niche for himself as a media advocate and one of the leading voices for transgender equality. He has a TED talk and a 2-year-old daughter.

22 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | SEX

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 313 | JULY, 2020

sex and salt lake city

Allies are sexy

Did you

BY DR. LAURIE BENNETT-COOK

consider that being an ally is sexy? I have, and I do. However, while I may be partnered with a person of color, I am still a white woman and I am feeling quite strongly that my voice isn’t the one to be heard right now, but rather that of a person of color who interacts intimately with white people. I have called on a friend of mine whose insights I’ve well regarded over the years. Please meet Erin Tillman — a colleague and friend who has some wise words to share with those of us who interact intimately with people of color.

Growing up in an all-White town, I was the only Black person in my grade for most of my schooling, and one of a handful of minorities in my entire school.

Even on Homecoming Court, I still didn’t have a date for that or any other school dances. I thought there was something wrong with me, maybe I wasn’t as pretty as my White classmates. Years later, I came to learn, there were actually many who wanted to ask me out but their parents wouldn’t allow it because I was Black. This wasn’t the 1950s, this was the 1990s.

Many Black people I know have the common experience of being seen as ‘other’ when it comes to standards of beauty; parents approving or disapproving of an interracial relationship, or feeling fetishized by people we are dating and by society as a whole.

I have dated several cisgender White men. Some developed into deep relationships. Others admitted they wanted to date me because they had never dated a Black woman and sadly, that would often shift into full fetishization that would take the form of wanting me to become a caricature of a societal stereotype. This was totally demoralizing.

I’d be lying if I said that I haven’t been extra selective when dating White men. It’s necessary.

It’s not, “Oh he’s cute,” it’s also a matter of, “Do I feel safe,” and “Does he respect me, and also my race?”

I know I’m in the midst of a true ally if they engage with someone when they hear a racist comment — even if it’s from a friend or family member. Also, if there is behavior that displays their pride of and solidarity with Black people in their life, that is also extremely sexy.

I think some of my exes would have trouble accepting the “Black Lives Matter” movement. Not because they don’t believe in it, but because they are afraid of talking about it. It’s absolutely heartbreaking to have someone care about you when the sex is good, but retreat when real issues come up. That’s when you really see if someone is truly in your corner or not. If someone makes the effort to understand and stand beside you even when things are tough…that allyship IS absolutely sexy.

I am fortunate to be in a beautiful relationship now. My partner is White and a fierce ally. When we met over a year ago, I knew that I could only be with someone who wasn’t afraid of having tough conversations about race. He grew up around Black and Brown people and had dated Black women before he met me, so having frank conversations about race was not new to him. Those conversations, difficult at times, ultimately made him irresistibly sexy!

Earlier this year, after brunch, we had a stranger approach, call me a Nigger and spit at both of us. My partner snapped into action and put his body between this

person and me. Thankfully, that scared him off. It was a terrifying experience not to know if this person was going to try to harm us in some way. At that moment, I knew my partner was indeed an ally. He was enraged, and his instinct was to protect me. Imagine the conflict of having sex with someone who is on the fence about being outspoken about your safety.

Imagine if my partner stood there and did nothing while this stranger threatened me? It would’ve been disheartening and scary at the least. Allyship is one of the sexiest things a partner can do.

Many interracial couples are having these deep conversations and societal experiences for the first time. Black people need a soft place to fall, especially right now; a safe place to be able to enjoy deep intimate connections without feeling like we are seen as “other.” What’s happening now will undoubtedly make us more selective with whom we choose to enjoy sex. Those who share a genuine appreciation for who we are, including our culture, is a great place to start. If my partner can listen and care about what I have experienced, that is the biggest turn on there is! Q Erin Tillman is an inclusive dating empowerment coach, speaker, TV/radio host for over 10 years, and author of The Consent Guidebook. She can be found at thedatingadvicegirl.com. A recent video where Tillman talks about her biracial relationship alongside her partner, Jet, can be found here.

Dr. Laurie Bennett-Cook is a Clinical Sexologist with a private practice in Salt Lake City who loves June Pride Month. During this pandemic she is seeing clients virtually on a “pay what you can” basis. She can be reached at: DrLaurieBennettCook@gmail.com

JULY, 2020 | ISSUE 313 | Qsaltlake.com

guest editorial

HRC: We must elect Joe Biden

BY ALPHONSO DAVID, PRESIDENT OF THE HUMAN RIGHTS CAMPAIGN

Almost

five years ago, as dusk hit our nation’s capital on a warm Friday summer night, lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer people gathered among both loved ones and strangers to celebrate a historic moment for our community — the Supreme Court decision legalizing marriage equality for same-sex couples nationwide. Alongside parents and friends, partners, and allies, we watched what was unthinkable just a few years earlier come to fruition.

We saw allies emerge at every level of government. We saw LGBTQ equality change their minds and become our partners. We saw the White House — the symbol of American leadership — light up in the colors of the rainbow.

While significant work remained in the fight for equality, it was a moment of almost unparalleled hope for our community and a profound step in our country’s march toward a more equal and perfect union.

But today, that evening can feel almost a world away.

In the years since the Obama-Biden administration left office, we have witnessed cruel attacks on the rights and dignity of LGBTQ people, especially our transgender siblings, by the current occupant of the White House.

Donald Trump, Mike Pence, and their cabal of anti-equality extremists have targeted LGBTQ workers, loving same-sex couples, transgen-

der troops, LGBTQ kids, and LGBTQ people seeking health care. Their attacks on women, people of color, people living with disabilities, and immigrants have particularly harmed those of us who live at the intersection of multiple marginalized identities. And in the age of coronavirus, a pandemic made worse by this administration’s willful negligence and notorious ineptitude, those in our community are disproportionately struggling to make ends meet, get the care they need or isolate with an unaccepting family that makes them much more vulnerable.

The LGBTQ community, and millions more across our country, cannot afford four more years of Donald Trump and Mike Pence. Our safety, economic security, health and lives are quite literally on the line. Now more than ever, we need a pro-equality president — and in Joe Biden we have that leader.

Where Donald Trump has sought to roll back our community’s historic progress under the Obama-Biden administration, Joe Biden will not only protect it, he will expand and build on it.

Where Donald Trump and his administration oppose the bipartisan Equality Act and its lifesaving nondiscrimination protections for LGBTQ people, Joe Biden is a vocal champion and has called the bill a top priority for his first 100 days. Where Donald Trump and Mike Pence have appointed anti-LGBTQ ex-

tremists to the federal bench and administration positions, Joe Biden’s cabinet and court appointments will be filled with compassionate leaders who understand that our nation’s diversity is our greatest strength. And where Donald Trump governs from a place of heartlessness and self-interest, Joe Biden will lead with the empathy and compassion that he’s exemplified through both personal tragedy and public service.

The LGBTQ community knows Joe Biden. We know that he will be a president who stands up for all of us.

And we at the Human Rights Campaign, the nation’s largest LGBTQ civil rights organization, are proud to stand with Joe in this fight and ready to mobilize our more than three

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 23

million members and supporters to work day and night to ensure that he is the next president of the United States.

We can once again have a president that honors our diversity and stands up for all of us, but only if we work for it, fight for it, and vote for it. And when we do, I know that soon enough we will gather together — safely — to celebrate another major step in our fight for equality when President Joe Biden signs the Equality Act into law.

It is within our power to feel the same hope and promise that so many of us felt on that Friday night in June of 2015. It takes electing Joe Biden as president this November to get there. Q Alphonso David is president of the Human Rights Campaign. Follow him on Twitter ­­ @alphonsodavid.

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Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 313 | JULY, 2020

who’s your daddy

Choosing my religion

BY CHRISTOPHER KATIS

One of

the biggest arguments Kelly and I ever had was over what the caterer would serve at Gus’ post-baptism party. He wanted it to be a vegetarian affair; I was concerned the Greek community would find that tacky, and therefore my parents would be embarrassed. It got so bad, I finally excused myself from the conversation and had him deal with my mom.

We may have fought about the food we wanted to serve, but we never fought about which religion the kids would have. I wanted our boys to be raised in the same religious tradition that I observe, the same faith my family has had for literally more than 1,500 years. Kelly couldn’t have cared less.

Our decision wasn’t unique. As leading LGBT expert Kryss Shane, the author of The Educator’s Guide to LGBT+ Inclusion notes, “Parents aren’t typically choosing a religion, often they are raised in one and they are determining whether to remain members.”

But for many LGBTQ+ parents, deciding what — if any — faith to follow can be confusing. It’s important to find a fit that’s right for you.

Rabbi Mark Sameth, the author of The Name: A History of the Dual-Gendered

Hebrew Name for God, and a New York Times op-ed piece, “Is God Transgender?” says, “Learn as much as you can about your religion’s global, national, and local policies in respects to LGBTQ issues. The website churchclarity.org is a recommended resource for learning about specific Christian churches’ policies.”

And don’t be afraid to ask questions of the church’s leaders. Shane notes, “Asking questions about how many members are LGBT+, watching for body language and tone of voice can offer clues about how the leadership feels about LGBT+ people.” She also suggests asking about marriage equality and how trans people are accepted.

“Does a more accepting and affirming house of worship exist for your family to join?” asks Sameth. “Does your preferred religion or denomination have a local or national affinity group from which you could learn about the range of responses to doctrinal issues? Groups like Mormon Spectrum, Dignity USA (Roman Catholic), More Light (Presbyterian), and Keshet (Jewish) are some of the many groups which provide support.”

There’s something else to remember: scripture is in the eye of the believer.

Sameth adds, “Some clergy and houses of worship — within the same religion or denomination — will interpret doctrine in such a way as to be more accepting and affirming than others.”

Rev. David Key, an ordained Southern Baptist minister (you read that right) says, “I would say that gay parents need to convey to children that there are different ways to interpret scripture. They need to highlight how social context has impacted the way Christians have practiced their faith over the centuries. Even the English translation from Greek and Hebrew limits the meaning of words, especially in relation to sexuality.”

He goes as far as to argue, “Homosexuality should never have been included in the scriptures. The modern concept was not imagined in ancient writings.”

No matter which, if any, religion LGBTQ+ parents choose for themselves and their children, issues with other family members may arise. If that’s the case, the experts agree: always be respectful, be secure in your reasoning, address their concerns, and set boundaries to ensure dignity for everyone involved.

In the end, my mom won — we served chicken at the baptism luncheon. Thankfully, Kelly forgot to raise his sign declaring MEAT IS MURDER! This family, comprised of three Greek Orthodox Christians and a Buddhist, believes #BlackLivesMatter. Q You can contact Kryss Shane at ThisIsKryss.com; Rabbi Mark Sameth at rabbimarksameth.com; and Rev. David Key at davidthebaptist@gmail.com.

OBITUARY | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 25

JULY, 2020 | ISSUE 313 | Qsaltlake.com

obituary Kestin Page ‘Be brave enough to be kind’ JUNE 14, 1990 — JUNE 9, 2020 KESTIN RICHARD PAGE passed away in his sleep on Tuesday, June 9, 2020. He was born in Ogden, Utah, the son of Wendy Naylin and Ronald Page.

Kestin attended school at Country View Elementary, Rocky Mountain Jr High, Fremont High School, and Weber State University. In high school, Kestin was editor of the newspaper and enjoyed performing in plays.

He enjoyed music, watching musicals, Star Trek AND Star Wars, going to movies and Pokemon Video games.

Kestin’s knowledge of history was astounding, he could remember an event and date at any time. His intelligence was amazing, he was able to analyze and come up with a solution that was always spot on.

Kestin’s ability to engage in dialogue with an open heart and mind made him one in a million. He had a unique ability to convey his convictions while not being condescending and allowing for give-and-take discourse.

His witty sarcasm and “nerdy” references dropped casually in conversation weren’t missed and were appreciated by those who “got it.”

Kestin had wisdom beyond his years

which led him to work tirelessly for the rights of all individuals and was always advocating for social justice. He was kind, intelligent, supportive, and had a giant heart.

Some of Kestin’s accomplishments included three years as president of Gender and Sexuality Alliance at Weber State University, president of WSU Democrats Club, student senator for WSU housing, LGBT Resource intern, member of the Psi Phi Psi Fraternity, and was involved in many other activities.

He was awarded the Young Democrat scholarship from Weber County Democratic Party. Kestin was currently working at the Internal Revenue Service.

“Be brave enough to be kind” was Kestin’s mantra. “I love you as big as the sky, my boy,” Mom. He was loved and admired by many!

Kestin is survived by his mother Wendy (Jodi) Naylin, father Ron Page, stepfather Stuart Mattson and sister Kensley (Jason) Moss, stepbrothers Trent (Brooke) Dykster and Bryson (Anne) Dykster, nieces, Aniston and Avery Moss, Brynnlie, Zoey and Berklee Dykster; nephews, Owen Moss and Karsyn Dykster; uncles, Alan Reeder and Scott (Dorothy) Naylin and special family friend Annette Terry.

He was preceded in death by his adoring grandmother Carol Naylin, grandfather Richard Naylin, uncle Randy Naylin and great-grandmother Mae Reeder.

Graveside services were held Tuesday, June 16, at Lindquist’s Washington Heights Memorial Park, 4500 Washington Blvd.

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26 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | GLOBAL PRIDE

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 313 |

JULY, 2020

Black Lives Matter will be centered in Global Pride event Global Pride leaders say they will amplify Black voices, acknowledging the international response to the death of George Floyd and the unprecedented demand for racial justice by working with founders of the Black Lives Matter movement.

“As a Black woman in the LGBTQIA+ community, I feel we must confront the systemic racism and violence facing my Black brothers, sisters, and non-binary siblings, in the larger culture and within the

LGBQIA+ community. I could not think of a larger platform than Global Pride to do this,” co-chair of the Global Pride organizing committee, Natalie Thompson said.

“I am proud to work beside so many diverse colleagues from around the world. Our community knows well that we must confront hate and prejudice head-on. We have been watching an epidemic of violence against trans people of color — mostly women — in the past decade and this

larger discussion must be inclusive and all-encompassing.

All Black Lives Matter.”

Organizers promise Global Pride to be the world’s largest-ever LGBTI+ Pride event.

Singer, songwriter, actor, and director TODRICK HALL will host the all-day event Saturday June 27 featuring a long list of appearances from the world of music, entertainment, advocacy, and politics.

Former U.S. Vice-President JOE BIDEN, Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives

Park City, Heber City banners celebrate June Pride Month Two Wasatch Back cities are celebrating June as Pride Month by displaying banners on their Main Streets.

The Park City Council passed a resolution in their May meeting declaring June as Pride Month in the city to increase “awareness and acknowledgment of the LGBTQ+ community by celebrating equality, inclusion, and empowerment for every member of Park City’s LGBTQ+ community.”

“Park City has a dedicated history of creating and supporting policies and programs that stand against discrimination and promote equality and opportunity for all members of the

LGBTQ+ community,” the resolution states. “Pride Month is a reminder of how much we have to celebrate and should prompt us to never let up in our efforts to ensure full equality, inclusion, and empowerment for every member of our LGBTQ+ community.”

Park City will hang their rainbow-themed “Love Where You Live” banners along Main Street.

Heber City also installed their banners that caused a bit of controversy last year. The banners have rainbow flag stripes over snow-capped mountains with “Pride on the Wasatch Back.”

NANCY PELOSI, Canadian Prime Minister JUSTIN TRUDEAU, Irish Prime Minister LEO VARADKAR and artists LAVERNE COX, ADAM LAMBERT, and KESHA are among those participating.

Global Pride is a 24-hour stream of music, performances, speeches, and messages of support, hosted by Todrick Hall on his YouTube channel on June 27, as well as on iHeartRadio’s YouTube channel and on the Global Pride website.

All content has been curated

JULY, 2020 |

GLOBAL PRIDE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 27

ISSUE 313 | Qsaltlake.com

guest editorial

Pride has no finish line

As I write

by Pride organizations across the globe who came together to organize Global Pride after the COVID19 pandemic caused the cancellation or postponement of more than 500 Pride events worldwide.

Other announced performers are ADAM LAMBERT, THE VILLAGE PEOPLE, MEL C, LEANN RIMES, PUSSY RIOT, CALUM SCOTT, NATASHA BEDINGFIELD, and MARY LAMBERT. Speakers from the world of entertainment include PUSSYCAT DOLLS, RITA ORA, BEBE REXHA, STEPHEN FRY, LESLIE JORDAN, and JOANNA LUMLEY. In late May Costa Rica legalized equal marriage, and the country’s president, CARLOS ALVARADO QUESADA, will be part of the event. Also participating are the Prime Ministers of Norway, ERNA SOLBERG, and Luxembourg, XAVIER BETTEL, and PRINCE MANVENDRA SINGH GOHIL of India. All were approached

by Pride organizations in their own country and agreed to be part of the festivities.

More than 500 Pride organizations submitted more than 1,000 pieces of content for Global Pride, and the volunteer production team is now editing the content to pull the 24-hour stream together.

“Fifty years ago, grassroots organizations came together to plan the first Gay Liberation Day that changed the world, including the Daughters of Bilitis, Gay Liberation

Front, Mattachine Society, and Lavender Menace. The production of Global Pride has been planned in the same grassroots manner, but with a 21st-century technological twist. LGBTQIA+ people from around the world will come together virtually during this crisis of racial injustice and a pandemic,” said executive producer for Global Pride, Michelle Meow.

“By taking Pride online, not only are we making sure that LGBTQIA+ people everywhere can still experience the joy and community of Pride, but we also for the first time are enabling people to take part in Pride wherever they are. This means people who aren’t out, or who are living in socially conservative countries, can take part. The support will mean so much to marginalized people everywhere.” Q Moreinformation at globalpride2020.org

BY BEN WINSLOW

this, people are gathering on Capitol Hill for another day of demonstrations. People are speaking out, sharing their struggles and pain of oppression and systemic inequality, and getting support from allies as they push for societal change.

Reflecting back on the history of the modern LGBTQ+ civil rights movement, there are a lot of similarities here.

I tell your stories and report at an arm’s length on many of these issues, so it’s a little uncomfortable for me to share my feelings or thoughts on the “Pride” season. Like a lot of you, my journey to self-acceptance and living authentically as a gay man is a long one, with no finish line.

Pride is believing in yourself, knowing that you have value and worth, and knowing that you belong here. Sometimes you have to remind yourself of that fact constantly. Sometimes you find that

reminder among your friends, co-workers, chosen family, and even with total strangers in the community.

There’s no parade or festival this year to have a public affirmation of Pride (thanks, COVID-19!). We are in times where we feel more distant and disconnected than ever before, even on a Zoom call with 40 other people. But when the parade has passed by and the party’s over, there’s still a community we’re in and we have a shared humanity.

Today, it’s my turn to remind our community: You belong here. Oh, and stay safe, wash your hands, wear a face mask when social distancing is not possible, make sure you’re registered to vote, and don’t be afraid to contact your lawmakers on issues that are important to you! Q Ben Winslow is a multi-platform journalist for FOX 13 News, breaking news on a number of platforms. He has covered some of Utah’s biggest news stories in a 20-year journalism career working for newspaper, radio, television, and digital mediums.

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28 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

Qsaltlake.com |

ISSUE 313 |

JULY, 2020

The 17th Damn These Heels Queer Film Festival is on for 2020, virtually, from July 10 through 19. Produced by the Utah Film Center, the Festival showcases fiction and non-fiction films from around the world that explore LGBTQ issues, ideas, and art.

Though this year’s festival is being presented online, the festival will continue to provide a selection of short and feature films, filmmaker Q&As and opportunities

for group conversations, organizers say.

“The dramatic events of the past few months have forced us to re-imagine how we operate and offer our programs,” Patrick Hubley, executive director for Utah Film Center, said. “For us, not presenting the Festival wasn’t an option, and based on the feedback we received directly from past Festival attendees, our community agreed with us. Though we aren’t able to

gather in person, we hope that this year’s festival will help us understand, heal, and celebrate the human capacity for innovation and perseverance, together.”

Hubley says that the Festival is the longest-running LGBTQ Film Festival in the Mountain West and has presented more than 248 thought-provoking and entertaining films over the years. Q

USA | DIRECTED BY JEN RAININ

USA | Directed by Dave Lindsay In 1988, two ex-convicts kidnapped, beat, raped, tortured and murdered Gordon Church, a gay college student from a rural Mormon community in southern Utah.

USA | DIRECTED BY MOLLY HEWITT

The story of one of the most influential women in lesbian history you’ve never heard of and the impact her work continues to have today.

USA | DIRECTED BY MIKE MOSALLAM

Mo, a practicing Muslim living in West Hollywood, is learning to navigate life post heartbreak. Enter Kal, an All-American guy who surprises Mo by offering to break fast with him during the holy month of Ramadan.

CHILE | DIRECTED BY PABLO LARRAÍN SPANISH WITH ENGLISH SUBTITLES

A couple deals with the aftermath of an adoption that goes awry as their household falls apart.

Festival info: utahfilmcenter.org/damntheseheels/dth2020/

When Trinity, an independent, sex-positive Dominatrix in Chicago, discovers a newfound (and drug-induced) talent for speaking to the dead, she consults a colorful series of spiritual advisers to harness ability.

USA | DIRECTED BY DANIEL LAABS

A young woman develops a bond with the man who rescued her from a car accident.

Winner of the Grand Jury Prize at Outfest.

JULY, 2020 |

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 29

ISSUE 313 | Qsaltlake.com

struggles.

USA | DIRECTED BY POSY DIXON

USA | DIRECTED BY ELEGANCE BRATTON

After his 1986 album is rediscovered, a black trans musician recounts his life, from the lonely 60s to the joy of witnessing the present.

Three gay and transgender youth of color who have become, like the director once was, homeless on the same street the Gay Rights Movement began so long ago.

USA | DIRECTED BY JOHN L. JACKSON, JR. & NORA GROSS

CHILE | DIRECTED BY SEBASTIÁN MUÑOZ

Chronicles the journey of southern-born, black gay researcher and performer, E. Patrick Johnson, as he travels home to North Carolina to come to terms with his past, and to Georgia, New Orleans, and Washington, D.C. to reconnect with six black gay men he interviewed.

A ’70s-set homoerotic prison drama based on a low-circulated pulp novel, tracking the sexual, often-violent and eventually murderous experiences of 20-something narcissist Jaime.

BRAZIL | DIRECTED BY THEODORE COLLATOS, CAROLINA MONNERAT

MEXICO / SINGAPORE | DIRECTED BY MAK CK

An observational documentary that tells the intimate story of a male rape survivor. Erick’s innermost thoughts, fears,

Larger-than-life actress, cabaret performer, activist, and proud sex professional since the age of eleven, Luana Muniz — one of Brazil’s most recognizable transgender personalities.

JAPAN | DIRECTED BY GRAHAM KOLBEINS JAPANESE WITH ENGLISH SUBTITLES

Trailblazing artists, activists, and everyday people from across the spectrum of gender and sexuality defy social norms and dare to shine in this kaleidoscopic view of LGBTQ+ culture in contemporary Japan.

USA, BRAZIL, MEXICO | DIRECTED BY MADDY PURVES AND ZOIE YOUNG

Same-Sex Attracted follows a handful of LGBT & SSA students over the course of an academic year at LDS-owned Brigham Young University as they live and grow at “the Lord’s University.”

These incredible individuals experience not only the regular day-to-day of being college kids, but also the unique trials that come with being LGBT at a Mormon school, grappling with questions of faith, sexuality, gender, family, love, and life.

Combined, the students’ stories paint an elaborate picture of what is going on in the trenches of the “Mormon and Gay” conversation.

30 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | COMICS

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 313 | JULY, 2020

PUZZLES | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 31

JULY, 2020 | ISSUE 313 | Qsaltlake.com

Larry on Love

Each Sudoku puzzle has a unique solution which can be reached logically without guessing. Enter digits 1 through 9 into the blank spaces. Every row must contain one of each digit, as must each column and each 3x3 square. Qdoku

Q doku Level: Medium

3 9 5

1 2 6 4 7

4

5 2 1

8 9 1 3 8 4 5 6 2

8

1 7 6 9

3 7

4

9 3 5 1 8 6 6 1 2 4 6 2 4 6 7 8 9 1 3 2 7 8 5 7 8 4 6 8 3 6 5 1 1 2 5 3 2 6 9 8 4 8 5 3 5 4 9

6

7

7 9 2 3 7 5 5 8 6

9 3

5

8

6

1

8 1

9 5 1 8 9 6 2 7

6 3 2 9 8 9 4 7

7 1 9

3

3

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41 Scores for Patty Sheehan 42 Hold dear ACROSS 1 Mercury and Saturn 44 Neck of the woods 46 Clean up Sarah but not Uranus Schulman’s Bohemia 5 Branches of a family 47 Like a Mapplethortree pe photo 10 Fey villain in The 48 Adriatic seaport Lion King 49 See 20-Across 14 Big-time defeat 15 Shakespearean title 55 Bizet opera title character start 57 Cut of meat 16 Q to a Scrabble 58 Estimator’s phrase player 17 Pay your share, with 59 Fashion designer Jacobs “up” 60 Top 18 Bishop’s hat, in 61 Backdrop for Aida Bristol 62 Blowjob filmer War19 Of a rear entrance hol 20 With 35- and 63 Satisfied fully 49-Across, a com64 Perfect serves from ment about love Mauresmo

by Larry Kramer (1935–2020) DOWN 23 Talking bird 1 One place to stick it 24 Committed to pene- 2 Top drawer tration?

3 Sex Dr. 27 All thumbs 4 Show boat, for 29 Like some programs example in gay studies 5 Sing the blues 31 Make noise in bed 6 “___ boy or girl?”

32 Go to the bottom 7 Greek tale 33 Physical opening?

8 Inside diameter 34 Chemical suffix 9 Former New York 35 See 20-Across Liberty player 38 Contemporary of 10 American Idol conBela testant’s goal 39 Gay Bob, for exam- 11 Fairy tale with ugly stepsisters ple PUZZLE SOLUTIONS ON PAGE 33

12 Home st. of Harper Lee 13 Theology subj.

21 Laid-back sort 22 Xtra’s prov.

25 Have oral sex at a restaurant?

26 Woodworker’s tool 27 Protected from the elements 28 Blithe Spirit playwright 29 Ana’s Nin account 30 Obligation, in court 31 Come slowly 32 “Beat it!”

36 Ted Allen and others 37 “If ___ Would Leave You” 40 Closet tendency 43 “Grey’s Anatomy” character named for a state 45 Tyler of Lord of the Rings 46 Went lickety-split 48 Keep moist in the kitchen 50 Marlene’s role in Blue Angel 51 The way you walk 52 McCormack in a reboot 53 Man, as a cruising goal 54 Ballet supporters 55 “Yankee Doodle Dandy” start 56 Word that connects Dick to Dyke

32 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | MARKETPLACE

deep inside hollywood Justice Smith just queered up Jurassic World Rising star Justice Smith (Pokemon: Detective Pikachu) just came out alongside his boyfriend, actor Nicholas Ashe (Queen Sugar), over social media, just in time for Pride Month.

They’re adorable together — an Instagram picture of them brushing their teeth side by side is the sweetest thing, truly — and since Smith’s statement on the matter included the perfectly composed and forthright, “… if your revolution does not include Black Queer voices, it is anti-black,” it’s just all the more satisfying. Smith also has some career news, some cinematic content coming down the road.

First, a psychological thriller called The Voyeurs. Then a high school dramedy about kids exploring their sexuality titled Generation. And a little indie feature co-starring Chris Pratt called Jurassic World: Dominion. Now, there was a time when an upand-comer would be forbidden from even thinking about joining a blockbuster mega-franchise and then risking it all by coming out of the closet. But that was five minutes ago; the kids are doing whatever they damn well please now. Isn’t it great?

Riverdale’s Lili Reinhart just came out Betty Cooper is bi. Well, OK, it’s actually Lili Reinhart, who plays Betty on Riverdale — and who, lest we forget, also lit up the screen in the superfemme crime hit Hustlers — that just went public about being bisexual.

We love it when this sort of thing happens, because the B in LGBT is too often overlooked,

and we’re always thrilled when charming young celebrities casually drop that information into the world. We especially like it when they do it in the publicity run up to a new movie.

The movie Reinhart’s got coming up is called Chemical Hearts, from director Richard Tanne (Southside With You), and it’s about a disabled teen journalist who finds love working on the school newspaper. Based on the novel Our Chemical Hearts by Krystal Sutherland, the film co-stars Austin Abrams (Euphoria) as the boy who earns his place in her emotional chem lab. If the movie theaters are in open by August, you’ll get to see this one there.

Otherwise, check for streaming.

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 313 | JULY, 2020

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Theron plays an immortal mercenary who leads a team of similarly gifted never-dying warriors to protect humanity, all the while confronted by villains who’d corrupt their ancient ways. The film is based on the graphic novel by Greg Rucka and features Chiwetel Ejiofor, Matthias Schoenaerts and KiKi Layne (If Beale Street Could Talk).

But here’s the bonus: a same-sex romance — one that’s been hot for centuries — between two members of the team, played by international actors Luca Marinelli and Marwan Kenzari. We’ll take it, the delicious queer icing on Theron’s Furiosa cake, when it drops on Netflix July 10. Q

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MARKETPLACE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 33

JULY, 2020 | ISSUE 313 | Qsaltlake.com

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34 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | QMMUNITY

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LGBTQ-Affirmative Psycho-therapists Guild of Utah  lgbtqtherapists.com * jim@lgbtqtherapists.com Utah Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce  utahgaychamber.com * info@utahgaychamber.com LGBT & Allied Lawyers of Utah  lgbtutahlawyers.com * lgbtutahlawyers@gmail.com Utah Independent Business Coalition  utahindependentbusiness.org 801-879-4928 DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233 YWCA of Salt Lake  ywca.org/saltlakecity 322 E 300 S 801-537-8600 HEALTH & HIV

Peer Support for Mental Illness — PSMI Thurs 7pm, Utah Pride Ctr Planned Parenthood 654 S 900 E 800-230-PLAN Salt Lake County Health Dept HIV/STD Clinic 660 S 200 E, 4th Floor Walk-ins M–F 10a–4p Appts 385-468-4242 Utah AIDS Foundation  utahaids.org * mail@utahaids.org 1408 S 1100 E 801-487-2323

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Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 313 | JULY, 2020

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Encircle LGBTQ Family and Youth Resource Ctr  encircletogether.org fb.me/encircletogether 91 W 200 S, Provo, 331 S 600 E, SLC Families Like Ours (ages 2-10)  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/youth-familyprograms/ Gay-Straight Alliance Network  gsanetwork.org Salt Lake Community College LGBTQ+ 8 slcc.edu/lgbtq/ University of Utah LGBT Resource Center 8 lgbt.utah.edu 200 S Central Campus Dr Rm 409 801-587-7973 USGA at BYU  usgabyu.com  fb.me/UsgaAtByu Utah State Univ. Access & Diversity Ctr  inclusion.usu.edu/ lgbtqa Utah Valley Univ Spectrum  facebook.com/ groups/uvuspectrum Weber State University LGBT Resource Center  weber.edu/ lgbtresourcecenter 801-626-7271 Youth Activity Night ages 10-14, 14-20  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/youth-familyprograms/

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BOOK REVIEW | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 35

JULY, 2020 | ISSUE 313 | Qsaltlake.com

the bookworm sez REVIEW BY TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER

Confessions of a Gay Priest

BY TOM RASTRELLI, C.2020, UNIV. OF IOWA PRESS, $19.95 / 328 PAGES

You spent days examining your life.

Sins: that’s what you were looking for How had you displeased God? How many lies, covets, dishonors? What have you done since — oh, when was your last confession, anyhow? They say the sacrament is good for your soul, and in Confessions of a Gay Priest by Tom Rastrelli, there’s a lot to tell.

Though he’d always known that he liked boys, little Tommy Rastrelli pretended the opposite when he was in gradeschool because marriage was what good Catholics did.

q scopes JULY

BY SAM KELLEY-MILLS

ARIES March 20–April 19

No one is having a lot of great times at the moment despite what the calendar says. Simple pleasures are defining life right now so find fun small things that pack a big punch.

Everything you’ve been working for is paying off slowly but surely. Take a positive outlook on life.

TAURUS Apr 20–May 20

Even if you’re having some trouble, there are some great solutions in-store. The way back to normal is a bumpy one covered with a lot of good intentions. Set some boundaries and even some “safe words” when dealing with friends you don’t trust.

Your decisions matter most.

GEMINI May 21–June 20

When things heat up, they really heat up. Whether you like it or not, the world is trying to get you engaged with some intense deals. Get out there and enjoy what you can with

His family was devout and Rastrelli never questioned God’s love. Not even after, he says, he was repeatedly molested by a doctor in his Iowa hometown.

For several reasons, he never told his parents about the abuse, enduring it for years until he’d convinced them that he was too old for a pediatrician. That God hadn’t saved him from a predator made Rastrelli slowly lose his faith and his self-respect.

He stopped attending Mass and began questioning the Church’s teachings.

But then God called a shocked Tom Rastrelli to the priesthood.

It happened while he was at college, and the whole idea quickly consumed him. Gone was the plan to major in theatre; instead, Rastrelli began to explore a world steeped in mystery and ritual, but overlaid with fear. Always believing that testimony against the doctor could save others from

the same abuse, Rastrelli took legal action, knowing that scandal could ruin his chance to attend seminary.

There were many things undiscussable, in fact, and the court case was only half of it. As he progressed in his journey to ordination, the secrets included priestly kisses, caresses, and soft lies that a “backrub” was just a backrub.

At nearly every gathering, Rastrelli was approached for sex or touched inappropriately, led to believe that celibacy had wiggle-room, plied with alcohol or favors, and left to deal with it alone.

He fell in misguided love.

And then he fell into a deep depression, with only one real way out...

Confessions of a Gay Priest is a hard, hard book to read — it’ll make you squirm, it’ll make your eyebrows raise, you’ll want to toss it on the street and let semis run it over and yet, it’s stay-up-all-

anyone you can. The parties are hopping and the lulls are relaxing. Engage your friends and loved ones.

and don’t fret compromise.

CANCER June 21–July 22

Pondering the biggest questions is vital right now. There are no better answers than the ones you come up with on your own. Seek a path where the goal is to pleasure yourself in ways you’ve never considered before.

Where there’s a will, there’s a way in the realm of self-realization.

LEO July 23–August 22

Take a chance with a friend or lover with a crazy idea. Nothing can be gained by playing things safe.

The surest way to have a good time is by throwing caution to the wind. But be aware that dangers do exist, and sometimes it’s worth a little sacrifice in order to keep the party going.

VIRGO August 23–Sep. 2

Long before the dust clears, some kind of conflict is bound to emerge in an ongoing battle. It could be a personal or work-related matter. But whatever happens, try to be fair. Nothing can be gained if the truth isn’t the first principal. Try to be the diplomat

LIBRA Sept 23–October 22

In the blink of an eye, the world could present you with a great opportunity. Taking advantage may seem automatic but take a moment to weigh in on all options. Some things are too good to be true, but be willing to find the stepping stones to a better life.

Look twice and jump once Libra!

SCORPIO Oct. 23–Nov. 21

A one night fling could lead to some sting. Don’t be careless with a personal encounter even if your heart is telling you how to feel. Protect what really matters and don’t be afraid to lay down the law. At the end of the day, there is a great reward that presents itself in the form of love.

SAGITTARIUS

Nov. 22–December 20.

The time has come to see a child or loved one for the grown-up they’ve become. No one has been more protective than you, but you both need space to get your bearings right now.

Even if you don’t have full control, you are gaining much more than you realize: a sense of accomplishment.

night compelling.

Beginning with his ordination (so you know-don’tknow the end of the story), author Tom Rastrelli tells a tale that will further shock Catholics already reeling from church-related scandals. This book, however, is not written in the same manner as is a diocesan document: Rastrelli is sometimes extremely graphic, both in the bedroom and in his various emotional states.

He doesn’t pull back the curtains on his experiences, he rips them down and burns them. He used pseudonyms, but tells details before softening his harshness with beautiful language, strong faith, and poetic distractions that play with a reader’s sympathy.

You can’t beat a book like that, though its graphic nature needs to again be underscored.

For a reader who can endure a panoply of squirms, Confessions of a Gay Priest is worth deep examination. Q

CAPRICORN Dec 21–Jan 19

Believe a friend who is telling you the truth about a convoluted situation. The best way to overcome the lies you’ve been hearing is to confront those who you suspect and act accordingly.

There is nothing wrong with some healthy confrontation but try to keep emotion out of the conflict.

AQUARIUS Jan. 20–Feb. 18

Take care of money matters during this time. The desire to spend on quality is never a bad thing.

But there comes a time when going with a little less is bound to provide a better future down the road. Spend some time with the comforts you already know. Hold a BYOB gathering.

PISCES Feb 19–Mar 19

Process information that you are hearing about yourself but draw your own conclusions. There is no better person to figure you out than yourself. Even being a little lost right now, the truth of what you stand for is right in front of you. Go solo for a bit and take matters into your own hands. Q

36 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | Q&A

Indigo Girls Let Loose

Amy Ray and Emily Saliers talk pandemic life, Trumpera inequality and how Pride can help heal the country’s divisions

BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI

The day

before I got on a call with Amy Ray and Emily Saliers, famously known as the Indigo Girls, the longtime folkrock duo and LGBTQ activists were playing a set for fans during a Facebook Live concert.

They had planned on performing in public venues, but their set of scheduled dates were canceled due to the pandemic.

Before the livestream performance, Ray and Saliers had been quarantining separately, long enough to feel they could safely and comfortably perform six feet apart in their manager’s empty, sterilized office. They were gearing up to release their 16th album, Long Look, which was released on May 22. A departure from the work they’ve created since the release of their 1989 breakout album, Long Look finds the Indigo Girls lyrically and musically untethered.

During our conversation in early May, Saliers and Ray discussed artistic freedom, intensified inequality during the Trump era, and honoring the true legacy of Pride.

PHOTO: JEREMY COWART

Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 313 | JULY, 2020

How are you holding up right now? SALIERS: Well, so there’s homeschooling to be done.

Amy has a young child and I have a young child, so that occupies a lot of my time. I’m sort of splitting it up with my wife and she’s working remotely, and then Amy and I are doing promo for the album. And then we do the live streams and stuff like that. And there’s a lot of catching up on other life that wasn’t able to be managed while on the road. And just keeping in touch with whom we can reach out to. Helping friends. Staying in communication. It’s been actually a very, very busy time.

How do you like doing these virtual concerts? RAY: I think they’re super fun. It’s challenging because it’s a whole different way of trying to engage. I mean, we’ve done a lot of live streams from the studio or from soundcheck, just kind of spontaneous things, and we’re just trying to keep things engaged; luckily, we have this awesome community of people who tune in and they sort of talk to each other. They kind of create a whole community around it, so they’re so engaged and we know that that’s happening when we see the comments, so it really helps us really do the songs and do them honestly and with energy and have a lot of feelings around it. And we get a lot out of it too. It’s definitely a kick in the butt. It’s good for us to stay on our toes.

Has quarantine been a creative time for you? SALIERS: I have found that it’s a creative time, but there’s not a lot of time to create. It’s challenging for me to have a 7-year-old home all the time; that’s a very different thing. So my wife and I are just kind of going back to the drawing board and carving out the things that we need to try to keep our personal lives in balance, which includes personal time away from each other, work time away from each

other, family time, schooling.

So, I haven’t been practicing Indigo Girls as much as I’ve been feeling very creative and working with my recording software. But actually finding the time to complete anything like I usually can in normal life has been impossible.

Going into this, everyone thought they’d have all this time to do everything. RAY: I was trying to analyze that, because I’ve been hearing other people from all walks of life — from my neighbors, who kind of work normal construction jobs, to people who have no kids — and everybody is experiencing it differently. But one thing people seem to be saying is, “I thought I’d have all this time, and now we’re just making meals and doing dishes and cleaning all the time.” I think it makes us understand how much we kind of eat out and get our meals in these really convenient packaged ways instead of that less wasteful way of eating at home and eating what you have.

There’s an eerily prescient line on the album’s title track: “Everyone I know can sense Armageddon.”

I’m not sure that you knew this is what Armageddon would look like, but when you sing a line like that now and reflect on where you were when you wrote it, what comes to mind? SALIERS: Well, the Armageddon that I’ve been experiencing is the day that Trump got elected president and the country’s divisions were magnified. And it’s not that the problems didn’t exist before, the systemic problems like racism and social inequality and all of the things that we’re aware about. But I believe they’ve gotten worse. I see the schisms in this country, and social media platforms don’t really help. There’s a lot of access to information and opinions that’s really not helping anyone and most of us engage in that in one way or another, so there’s sort of a societal illness that’s tied into social media.

And when I say illness, I also believe that the earth is so sick and she’s pissed. The natural world is the leader. And so we think we’re so important and we’ve achieved all these things and blah, blah. And it’s nothing when mother nature gets pissed. I believe that’s what’s happening, and we can sense that, and that leads to feelings of unrest and the thought of Armageddon.

Armageddon is a very extreme word to use, but it was indicative of the social malaise: unrest, no answers. And now, of course, the unknown causes most everybody I know a great deal of anxiety: How long will the virus last? What happens when there are outbreaks of it? When am I ever gonna work again?

Are you wrestling with those questions yourself? SALIERS: I’m very privileged, so I’m not wrestling with, “Where’s my next meal gonna come from?”

But because I’ve read a lot of history, and there are patterns that happen when there’s a complete lack of leadership, I see the writing on the wall for what happens to nations and civilizations where that continues. I think about it in a prophetic way based on what I know about history, and that’s kind of depressing. I seek my joy in human communication and people who are resilient over difficulties. So my joy comes in little things, and my despair comes in big things.

When you look back at recording your first album, how do you compare that experience to recording Long Look? RAY: This was a really special, standout time for us because it was the reunion of the group of people we met back in the late ’90s when we played Lilith Fair. There was a band backing Sinead O’Connor that we became friends with and we all sort of hung out together and then we started playing music together. They’re all from England and Ireland, and their musicality was incredible.

JULY, 2020 |

ISSUE 313 | Qsaltlake.com

DINING GUIDE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 37

DINING GUIDE Then we made a record called Come On Now Social and recorded it in 1999, and this band is the reunion of that band, without Sinead.

They’ve kind of been our musical compass all these years, but we haven’t gotten to make a whole record with them and have everybody together in one place; it’s been here and there.

It was a great experience. We were in England at Real World Studio near Bath and we lived there, and it was a short thing.

We just worked every day and ate meals together.

Because Long Look explores how the past shapes us, what did you learn about yourselves while making it? And did you learn anything new about each other in the process? SALIERS: There’s a song called “Sorrow and Joy” I wrote about some very personal things that happened in my family. When my sister died, there was a time when it was an impossible thought for me to think that I could ever write about that, even though that was stuck in the center of me and I couldn’t break it up. So, I learned that. Didn’t learn it but it was a reminder of, things shift. And it was a reminder of, whenever I get a feeling like I’m never gonna be this way, or I can’t do this, that things shift over time. So it just was very interesting to me that I went to a subject matter that I could never talk or write about to something that I could.

The older I get the more I draw on the past for what to write about, even though Amy and I are very much centered in the present with wanting to create music and play shows and feeling like we are still a working band. We just know what it takes to keep our balances and stay creative. I don’t know if I’ve learned anything new about us. I know we went into recording the album not having a ton of time to prearrange everything. I’m not saying we went into it blindly, but

we went into it thinking we were gonna go into the studio and just see what happens.

If I look back on our career, at the very beginning, of course, we were much more controlling about what happened and what the arrangements were and what we would or wouldn’t have on the album. Now I know that we can just sort of float in this freedom of, “Something cool is gonna happen,” because we’re with the right people and we know what to do with each other, and so that was really cool.

What do you hope Pride might look like this year? RAY: This is just a monumentally different time than we’ve ever had in our lives, so how do you deal with that? I think as time goes on we want to get out there, and Pride is one of those times. You want to see your friends; it’s a very celebratory time because we like to celebrate queer people.

So I hope people can understand that we still need to hold back from that and think of other ways to celebrate. I think the creative community is so innovative and there are so many rich things to access that people are doing, so that of course can carry on during Pride.

Maybe we can reach out as a gay community and help communities that are really suffering right now, and within our own community making sure that we’re helping the people who need food and need shelter and are homeless or are dealing with a lot of stuff that is really hard to deal with during these times.

Maybe we can reach out and take care of our own and make sure our family at large is doing OK. Pride to me is not just about a big party. It’s also: How can we continue this legacy and truly have Pride and give people the dignity they deserve that they don’t have? Q As editor of Q Syndicate, Chris Azzopardi has interviewed a multitude of superstars, including Cher, Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey and Beyoncé. His work has also appeared in The New York Times, Vanity Fair, GQ and Billboard. Twitter @chrisazzopardi.

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Qsaltlake.com | ISSUE 313 | JULY, 2020

the perils of petunia pap smear

A tale of driving Miss Petunia

BY PETUNIA PAP SMEAR

The road

to the potato field is fraught with danger

and excitement.

As you may know, when I was just a little princess in training, I was raised on a potato farm in Idaho. Way back during the Jurassic Period, kids on the farm learned to drive quite early in life.

By the age of 10, I had graduated from riding my tricycle to slowly driving the hay-hauling truck between the rows of hay in the field while my dad and some hunky shirtless farmhands hoisted the heavy bales onto the truck. Because I was too small to reach the pedals, dad would set the throttle at a slow pace. Therefore all I had to do was steer the truck so as not to run into any of the hay bales and watch the rippling muscles of the farmhands glistening with perspiration as they became more and more tan.

Several times I got so busy watching the boys that I would run the truck into the occasional bale. When chastised, I would claim that I couldn’t help it because I could not see over the dash, which was quite literally true. And they bought it, especially if I let my lower lip quiver a little. This is where I learned the value of well-timed tears, although I had yet to discover eye make-up and the tragedy of tear-stained running mascara.

There were occasions when I needed to stop the truck, and that required that I stand on the clutch with both feet until the truck would coast to a stop. About every fourth time I stood on the clutch, my feet would slip off the pedal and the truck would lurch forward, often sending the farmhand who was stacking the hay on the truck flying. The resulting “discussions” are where I learned a very impressive and colorful vocabulary.

This was all good training for Driver’s Ed. Oh, how I longed for the day when I would get to drive my dad’s sky-blue Buick Electra 255, which was only four inches shorter than the hay truck, on the road. Later, after graduating from college,

I bought my own sky-blue Buick Electra and named it Queertanic.

We inherited an old red 1964 Chevy pickup truck from my grandfather. It had about 300,000 miles on it. The radio was broken. The heater didn’t work. The glove box had been stuck shut for years. But it ran.

One day my dad loaded me and four hunky farmhands into the back of the truck and drove us all about a mile from the house to check the irrigation ditches in the potato field. Back in the day, we could ride in the back of a truck with no concern, and I was ever-so-happy to be back there with the handsome farmhands.

Dad instructed each brawny farmhand to patrol separate sections of the ditch bank and search for leaks while working their way back toward the house, then everyone would meet for dinner. I was instructed to inspect a short section of the ditch and return to the truck.

I inspected my section of ditch quickly because I was hungry and wanted to eat soon. I lingered in the truck for what seemed like an eternity. No one came back. I was left alone, listening to the sounds of the crickets and the growling of my stomach while daydreaming about pot roast with mashed potatoes and gravy.

I decided that I had been abandoned, and if I wanted dinner, it was up to me to get back to the house on my own. So, I put the transmission into second gear and turned the key, while pushing my foot on the gas. Low and behold, the truck lurched to a start, and I drove it all the way home in second gear. Unbeknownst to me, my dad and all the farmhands were standing on the front lawn of the house, trying to decide who should fetch me when they noticed the truck begin to move ever so slowly up the road. When I pulled into the farmyard, I didn’t know what to do, so I just stood on the brake

until the engine killed. Such was my first foray in driving.

Since I had now driven on the road, I felt ready for Driver’s Ed. I had seen a movie in which a very glamourous woman had worn opera-length gloves to drive. I was enamored with that image.

Obviously, my initial primal queenly instincts were just beginning to surface.

I decided that I needed a place to store

some opera-length driving gloves of my own. So, I was cleaning out the red pickup and decided that I was going to open the glove box that had been stuck shut for at least 10 years. I got a crowbar and forced the door of the glove box open for the first time in ages. I was horror-struck at what I saw inside. There, sitting loosely, jiggling around with every bump in the road, were five sticks of dynamite, sweating in the heat. I ran away. We ended up calling and explosives expert to come and remove them. He said that we were extremely lucky not to have blown up years ago.

This story leaves us with several important questions: 1. If I had started to wear high heels earlier; might they have helped keep my feet on the clutch?

2. Do I drive the large Queertanic in hopes of filling it with hunky farmhands?

3. Is this where my fear of dying while lying in a ditch somewhere originated?

4. If the truck had exploded with me in it, would that have been the world’s largest glitter bomb?

These and other eternal questions will be answered in future chapters of The Perils of Petunia Pap Smear. Q