UTAH SCHOOLS FORFEIT GAMES OVER TRANS PLAYER • PETUNIA’S FIRST DRESS
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BY CRAIG OGAN
In 1992, the Alabama Legislature banned the use of pharmaceuticals and hormones for transgender therapy for people under the age of 19. An injunction stopping the law from going into effect was ended by the 11th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals, and the case continued. During the trial, the volume of transgender healthcare services in the U.S. paid by the government and private insurance companies was revealed, showing that between 2019 and 2023, 13,944 minors were given puberty blockers, hormones, and surgeries; 5,747 minors underwent facial, breast, and genital surgeries; and 8,579 minors were prescribed 62,682 prescriptions of cross-gender hormones and puberty blockers — roughly seven separate prescriptions per patient. Private insurance, Medicaid, and Medicare were charged $119,791,202 for the therapies.
Hurricane Helene flooded the gay bar, DayTrip, in Asheville, North Carolina, in September. The owners, married couple Brandon and Davie Davis, opened the bar and coffee shop just weeks before Helene blew through the Southeast coast. The couple planned to use Day Trip to host LGBTQ+ fundraisers, shows,
dog adoptions, and other community events. Helene had other plans. The boys returned after the storm to find the building under 23 feet of water. A friend of the owners started a GoFundMe page and, so far, raised over $199,000 to rebuild the venue. The couple says they’ll use the money to rebuild and compensate employees who lost their wages. This is the proverbial silver lining to the real “dark cloud” of a destructive hurricane.
The “lawfare” against cake baker Jack Phillips, the Colorado Christian baker who stands on religious freedom grounds to deny making custom cakes for whomever his religion suggests is not cake-worthy, may be coming to an end. For the second time, the Colorado Supreme Court has ruled in his favor on a technicality. The first case where he wouldn’t do a same-sex wedding cake was thrown out on the basis that the enforcing agency showed animosity to Phillips’ religion. The second case, his refusal to bake a “gender reveal cake” for the reveal party of a transgender woman, has been thrown out of court on a technicality. The majority held the statute’s path for complaint was through the Colorado Civil Rights Commission, not the courts. Tithing miracle stories?
California Gov. Gavin Newsom has been sending mixed signals lately by signing some legislation and vetoing other bills supported by the California LGBTQ+ community. He signed SB-729 Health Care Coverage: treatment for In-
fertility and Fertility Services, mandating group health insurers provide IVF coverage to plan holders regardless of sexual or gender identity. He also signed AB1825, the California Freedom to Read Act prohibiting “libraries from banning books based on partisan or political reasons, viewpoint discrimination, gender, sexual identity, religion, disability, or on the basis that the books contain inclusive and diverse perspectives.” He vetoed AB-2442 and SB-1067, both dealing with procedures to fast-track licensing out-ofstate physicians specializing in gender-affirming care. The legislation was passed to make California a sanctuary state for transgender health care allowing treatment prescribed by MDs from other states, not vetted by California authorities, to be conducted in the state quickly.
GLSEN, the leading education organization dedicated to advocating for K-12 schools and learning environments for LGBTQ+ youth, will honor Emmy Award-winning actor Sheryl Lee Ralph with its Champion Award. The award is given to “a role model and an advocate” for LGBTQ+ youth. Previous honorees include Annette Bening, Julia Roberts, Zendaya, Idina Menzel, Billy Porter, Jessica Biel, Octavia Spencer, Ellen Pompeo, Tim Cook, and Kerry
Washington, among others. Ralph portrays Barbara Howard in ABC’s hit comedy “Abbott Elementary.” She won the Emmy for Outstanding Supporting Actress in 2022.
The outrage mob took on the National Women’s Soccer League’s newest team, Boston-based BOS Nation Football Club, for its introductory ad campaign. The club introduced its team with a city-wide ad campaign called “Too Many Balls,” making a whimsical word-play on all the “ball teams” in sports-crazy Boston. The social media video and billboards featured an array of Boston’s professional sports teams, namely the New England Patriots, the Red Sox, and the Celtics. Complaints on social media criticized the ads for emphasizing male athletes. “Why are we making our National Women’s Soccer League’s announcement about men?” a user wrote on X. Other users complained that the campaign assumes that only men have balls, arguing that it makes the campaign transphobic. The team apologized to “the LGBTQ+ community and to the trans community in particular for the hurt we caused. We fully acknowledge that the content of the campaign did not reflect the safe space we are trying to create.”
The Democratic nominee for Vice President is being smeared by conservative media and his political opponents with the gay-innuendo brush. At the annual “Al Smith” dinner in New York City, the Republican presidential candidate quipped that Democrats say men can have periods. Said the quipster, “I didn’t believe it, then I met Tim Walz.” There is a social media campaign suggesting that Walz had a relationship with one of his male students, which has gained little credibility. Now Tucker Carlson, former TV opinion show host, says Walz’s jazz hands are proof that Walz is gay. Carlson says Democratic
leaders are not letting Walz declare his homosexuality. Carlson showed a video of the nominee’s animated hand movements as proof of his gay bona fides. Can’t wait for this election to be over.
French futbol (that’s soccer in the U. S. of A.) fans have been warned not to chant “gay taunts” at opposing teams. The chants were directed at the Marseille team by Paris Saint-Germain supporters, who felt betrayed that the Marseille team had poached personnel from PSG. The chants have become so pervasive that some French fans have been banned from attending matches. In Great Britain, the Tottenham Football Club has warned fans not
to repeat unfriendly chants with a gay theme about a rival West Ham player. The chant most offensive praises one player but denigrates another. “Dom Solanke is f***ing class. Mik Arteta takes it up the a**. 60 million down the drain, Dom Solanke scores again.” Tottenham has security personnel outfitted with body cams to identify any fan chanting gay taunts in an unfriendly manner or shouting “rent boy” at team personnel. In Mexico, it is considered free speech to shout “maricon” or “chico de alquiler” during a match.
WorldPride DC 2025 has announced that global su-
perstar Shakira will headline the Welcome Concert at Nationals Park on Saturday, May 31, 2025. This marks the start of WorldPride festivities, which coincide with the 50th anniversary of DC’s Pride celebrations, running from May 17 to June 8, 2025. With an estimated three million visitors expected, the event will showcase the LGBTQ+ community’s rich history and contributions. Shakira’s performance will be part of her Las Mujeres Ya No Lloran World Tour, her first since 2018. Fans can access presale tickets via Shakira.com, with general sales starting October 25. VIP packages are available for an elevated experience. For more details, visit WorldPrideDC.org. —MA Q
Southern Utah University and Utah State University were the first and fourth institutions to forfeit women’s volleyball matches against San Jose State University without explanation. Boise State and the University of Wyoming have also opted to forgo matches against SJSU.
USU released a brief statement announcing the cancellation of the October 23 match, simply stating, “Utah State University will not participate in its scheduled October 23, 2024, volleyball match at San Jose State University. The University will abide by Mountain West Conference policy regarding how this match is recorded.”
However, the underlying issue appears to center around Blaire Fleming, a transgender female athlete on SJSU’s team, as reported by San Francisco’s KRON4.
The controversy first came to light when SUU canceled its September 14 match against SJSU, with Boise State and Wyoming soon following. None of the universities explicitly cited the participation of a transgender athlete as their reason for forfeiture, but public statements and growing political support suggest the issue of transgender inclusion in women’s sports is at the heart of the matter.
Utah Governor Spencer Cox, an alumnus of USU, made a statement on X, saying: “I stand with the students, coaches, and leadership at @SUUtbirds and @USUAggies in their decision to forgo their women’s volleyball matches against San Jose State. It is essential that we preserve a space for women to compete fairly and safely. Our female athletes are left grappling with this difficult issue because the NCAA has failed in its responsibility to protect female athletes and women’s sports.”
Utah State House Speaker Mike Schultz also applauded the universities for their actions, urging the NCAA to address the matter with urgency.
“It’s time for the NCAA to take action to protect our female athletes and preserve women’s sports,” he stated. The growing political support mirrors that of other conservative states where
government officials have pushed back against policies allowing transgender athletes to compete in women’s sports.
This controversy is part of a larger national debate surrounding transgender athletes’ participation in women’s sports, an issue that has ignited passionate responses from various sides. Earlier this year, a lawsuit was filed by a group of female athletes challenging the NCAA’s policies that allow transgender women to compete in women’s collegiate sports.
nority instead of the American sports fan.”
The lawsuit faces opposition from the American Civil Liberties Union and other human rights advocacy organizations.
“We feel called upon to defend against extremist attacks on our trans sisters –attacks that weaponize and distort the language of women’s rights to justify discrimination and bigotry,” Shiwali Patel, a director at the National Women’s Law Center, said in a news release. “Women athletes from across the country have voiced support for the inclusion of trans
Among the plaintiffs is former collegiate swimmer Riley Gaines, who has become a prominent figure in the fight to restrict transgender athletes from women’s competitions. Gaines praised USU’s decision to forfeit, saying on social media: “Major kudos to @USUAthletics. The gender ideology house of cards is crumbling, and it’s a glorious sight.”
SJSU Women’s Volleyball teammate Brooke Slusser joined the lawsuit, stating, “If I have daughters and I had to sit there and watch them play against a male player, or be on a team with a male player, and knowing that I could have done something about it and didn’t, I think that would be a really hard situation for me to end up in,” according to the ultra-conservative Fox News-owned Outkick, which describes itself as “exposing the destructive nature of ‘woke’ activism,” and “the antidote to the mainstream sports media that often serves an elite, left-leaning mi-
college athletes, including the iconic Billie Jean King, Megan Rapinoe, Sue Bird, and the reigning champion NCAA Women’s Basketball Coach Dawn Staley.”
“This lawsuit is not only an attack on trans women and girls–it’s an attack on all women and girls,” said Jennesa Calvo-Friedman, staff attorney for the ACLU’s Women’s Rights Project. “Policing who is, or isn’t, a woman subjects all women and girls to intrusive and humiliating scrutiny. In states across the country, we’ve seen cis and trans girls alike subjected to invasive questioning and harassment because their hair is too short, or they perform too well, to be considered ‘real girls.’ Women’s sports are critical because they provide freedom from pressure to comply with expectations about how women should look and behave, but this lawsuit diminishes that freedom and joy.”
The NCAA’s transgender student-athlete participation policy, updated in May 2024, determines eligibility on a sport-by-sport basis, aligning with the International Olympic Committee’s guidelines. For volleyball, USA Volleyball regulations dictate that transgender athletes can compete if they meet specific testosterone level requirements. Despite this policy, the growing number of forfeitures suggests that not all schools are comfortable with the current regulations.
As of now, the Mountain West Conference, to which both Utah State and San Jose State belong, has yet to comment on the series of forfeitures. Under conference rules, the matches forfeited by SUU, Boise State, Wyoming, and now Utah State, will be recorded as losses, benefitting SJSU’s undefeated record.
NCAA defers to the rules outlined by USA Volleyball. Any athlete who wants to compete as a gender different than the gender they were assigned at birth “must notify USAV of their intent at least six weeks prior to the competition in which they wish to participate.
Sufficient documentation must be provided to permit the GC to determine that the applicant has taken the necessary steps to transition to their adopted gender.” Three submissions are required:
1) a statement that the athlete wants to compete as a different gender;
2) a statement from their treating physician with medical records showing that they have taken steps to transition their gender;
3) lab reports of testosterone levels.
For transgender collegiate volleyball athletes, “testosterone levels must not exceed the upper limit of the normal female reference range for their age group,” which specifically means testosterone levels must be less than 10 nmol/L for a minimum of one year prior to their application being submitted to USA Volleyball.
Equality California, an LGBTQ+ civil rights group, condemned the forfeiting universities’ decisions as politically motivated attacks from the right, unrelated to sports.
“Let’s be clear – this isn’t actually about sports; it is part of a coordinated nationwide attack on the LGBTQ+ community led by extremist right-wing politicians,” Equality California executive director Tony Hoang wrote. “School administrators’ decision to bow to pressure from extremists instead of allowing their student-athletes to compete harms all students involved. They are teaching fear-mongering and discrimination instead of fostering the camaraderie and competition college athletics should be about. Less than 2 percent of NCAA athletes identify as transgender or nonbinary. All trans athletes want to do is work hard and compete alongside their teammates — just like everyone else. Equality California stands with San Jose State University and appreciates their strong support for their student-athletes.”
SJSU implemented measures to ensure the safety of its women’s volleyball team as the program became a focal point in the broader debate over transgender athletes in sports.
According to SJSU spokesperson Michelle Smith McDonald, the team has been accompanied by additional security from university police for several weeks, both at home and on the road. McDonald highlighted that some social media activity targeting the team and university has been “unsettling,” emphasizing that student safety is the university’s top priority.
McDonald also clarified that while Boise State, Wyoming of the Mountain West, and Southern Utah forfeited matches against San Jose State, these are counted as victories by the conference but classified as “no contest” for NCAA Tournament purposes.
SJSU has 14 matches remaining in the regular season, plus the Mountain West tournament, and needs to play 19 matches to qualify
for the NCAA Tournament. If further forfeits occur, it could jeopardize their postseason eligibility.
SJSU team played against Colorado State on Thursday, Oct. 3, losing its first match of the season in straight sets.
The next team on the schedule, the University of Nevada-Reno, confirmed it will play the team, saying, “The University will continue to abide by the NCAA, Mountain West Conference and USA Volleyball rules and regulations as well as the laws and Constitution of the State of Nevada.” At press time, it was announced the game would be moved from Reno to San Jose “in the best interest of both programs and the well-being of the student-athletes, coaches, athletic staff and spectators,” the Mountain West Conference said in a statement. Q
A campaign of text messages is targeting Utah legislators who are running for re-election who voted “against Utah girls” by opposing anti-transgender bills in the past two legislative sessions.
The text sent to the phone of QSaltLake Magazine‘s editor reads, “Protecting women’s sports and our girls is common sense. Unfortunately, Rep. Jennifer Dailey-Provost continues to vote AGAINST Utah’s girls. Vote for common sense. Vote against Jennifer Dailey-Provost.”
The attached graphic lists Preserving Utah Values PAC as the text’s sender. A website for the PAC calls out certain Utah legislators who voted to allow: “males to use girls (sic) locker rooms,” “males to play girls (sic) sports,” and “irreversible transgender surgeries for minors.”
The legislators are Representatives Rosemary Lesser, Sandra Hollins, Jennifer Dailey-Provost, Angela Romero, Sahara Hayes, Doug
Owens, Carol Moss, Ashlee Matthews, Andrew Stoddard, Gay Lynn Bennion, Joel Briscoe, Brian King, and Mark Wheatley. Also listed are Senators Luz Escamilla, Kathleen Riebe, Karen Kwan, and Stephanie Pitcher. The site once listed Republican Senators Daniel Thatcher and Todd Weiler, but their names have since been removed.
“Whether you’re a Democrat, Republican or Independent, wrong is wrong,” the website continues. “Stand up for our daughters. Protect our children.”
It finishes with “Stay informed, Preserve Utah values, not dangerous nonsense.
The site lists no contact information or author but says it is paid for by the “Preserving Utah Values Fund.” No information on such a fund is listed with the state of Utah, but the Preserving Utah Values PAC is registered with the Utah Lieutenant Governor’s office.
The PAC’s filing shows
Thomas Datwyler as treasurer and primary officers. Datwyler is also treasurer of many conservative and ultra-conservative candidates, organizations, and election denial groups through his business, 9Seven Consulting. These include PACs run by Utah Sen. Mike Lee, the campaigns of Lee, Sen. Mike Kennedy, and Colby Jenkins, and the Green Dragon Society run by Lee’s chief of staff, Dan Hauser, that has the “noble objective of restoring and reaffirming the foundational principles of the American Republic” by “upholding the horizontal and vertical protections of federalism and separation of powers.”
Datwyler has several lawsuits directed at him, and his business and was tied up with former U.S.
Rep. George Santos. He has not responded to media inquiries about the suits.
Citizens for Ethics recently reported that a “super PAC supporting Sen. Mike Lee (R-UT) received hundreds of thousands of dollars from a group” called Liberty Champions, which is affiliated with Datwyler. Citizens for Ethics said that Liberty Champions spent more than $1.6 million on independent expenditures supporting Sen. Lee in his 2022 Senate reelection effort. It is not known if Lee or any of the other Utah legislators represented by Datwyler are part of the Preserving Utah Values PAC, as no other information but the name, address, and Datwyler’s name has been filed with the state.
Equality Utah, the state’s leading LGBTQ advocacy organization, will be moving its offices to a new location on Harvey Milk Boulevard on 9th South in Salt Lake City. The organization, which played a role in advocating for the street to be named after the late San Francisco supervisor and LGBTQ trailblazer, announced the move to the new multi-use building next year.
Troy Williams, executive director of Equality Utah, confirmed that the organization will occupy the top floor of a building currently under construction at 402–430 East Harvey Milk Boulevard. The building, which is expected to be completed by June 2025, will coincide with Salt Lake City’s Pride festivities. Williams expressed excitement about the move, noting the street’s significance in honoring Milk’s legacy and joining other civil rights advocates commemorated in the city.
“Salt Lake City is a very progressive town,” Williams said. He highlighted that five of the city’s seven council members identify as LGBTQ, further illustrating the city’s growing support for equality.
The relocation comes at a time when Salt Lake City is positioning itself as a hub for LGBTQ visibility. The stretch of Harvey Milk Boulevard, home to various LGBTQ-owned businesses, is evolving into a burgeoning community center. Williams mentioned that the area,
nicknamed the “Milk Block,” includes a nightclub named after Milk, as well as a mural dedicated to the gay rights icon.
The building’s developer, Kathia Dang, echoed Milk’s vision for community building, saying, “We believe in building community — in our case, one block at a time.”
Equality Utah will also launch the Harvey Milk Blvd. LGBTQ Neighborhood Visibility project, which aims to celebrate the stories of queer Utahans. Williams emphasized that the organization’s ultimate goal is to create a beacon of hope for LGBTQ youth in Utah, a state often seen as conservative
but which has made strides in advancing LGBTQ rights in recent years.
Despite its reputation, Utah has enacted several progressive measures, including LGBTQ-inclusive hate crime laws and a ban on conversion therapy for minors. Williams believes this progress should encourage young LGBTQ people to feel empowered to stay in the state and enjoy the equal rights and freedoms available to them.
The move marks a new chapter for Equality Utah as it continues to advocate for LGBTQ rights while establishing Harvey Milk Boulevard as a symbol of hope and progress. Q
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GOP responses to Log Cabin Republicans President Charles Moran after he tweeted “It’s official! The national GOP platform has been stripped of all anti-LGBT language! Inclusion won! Thank you @realDonaldTrump”
“You’re still disgusting”
@Dubflip
“You do know, when their takeover of America is complete, you’re going to be among the first against the wall right?”
@CadetBoneySpurs
“Imagine knowing what cock tastes like and expecting respect from normal people.”
@SquareKnotTC
“Pedophile sodomite we don’t want you. Find God and leave the party”
@ExiledAmphibian
“No it hasn’t. Everybody still feels the same about you.”
@ChaldeanGroyper
“Nope. I’m out. Traditional marriage.”
@kcorvo2
“You do not represent the party, the ideals, nor the theology of the right. Begone demon”
@PursueInfinite
“Charles T Moron”
@Jezzerat
“FAGGOTS! FAGGOTS! FAGGOTS! FAGGOTS! FAGGOTS! FAGGOTS! FAGGOTS! FAGGOTS! FAGGOTS! FAGGOTS! FAGGOTS! FAGGOTS! ... ”
@ThePiedPiper007
BY CHRISTOPHER KATIS
Years ago, I started a job where I was the first openly gay person that most of my colleagues had ever met. Wildly, this was in a San Francisco suburb. Apparently, they were all surprised to learn Kelly is a guy since I didn’t fit their stereotypical views of what gay men are like.
Although I felt a bit like a lab rat, I took it as an educational opportunity and encouraged questions. One of the weirdest conclusions they deduced was that I must be “the girl” because, back then, I did most of the cooking.
This reflected their own reality. In fact, although it has become more equitable all these years later when it comes to unpaid household labor, women still do most of the lifting, like cooking, cleaning, laundry, and childcare. That has everything to do with “traditional” gender roles. But, that uneven distribution of labor is not seen in LGBTQ+ couples. In fact, according to a study cited in The New York Times, gay male couples are the most egalitarian when it comes to divvying up household chores.
“In same-gender relationships, these traditional gender roles are less likely to be present, allowing for a more equitable distribution of unpaid labor,” said Sam Skye, ATR, LAT, LPC and practice owner of Full Spectrum Therapy, which provides LGBTQIA+ affirmative mental health services. “Couples in same-gender relationships are more likely to negotiate and communicate openly about the division of labor. This often leads to a more balanced and fair allocation of tasks, based on individual strengths and preferences rather than societal expectations.”
There’s a reason for this. Dr. Abbie Goldberg of Clark University, who wrote the book “Lesbian and Gay Parents and Their Children,” directed
me to a Financial Times story in which she commented, “same-sex couples normally have fewer preconceived ideas of how relationships ‘ought to be.’ Without traditional gender roles as a guide, gay couples tend to negotiate.”
This egalitarian approach extends to child rearing as well. A study by the Family and Work Institute cited in a New York Times story found that “same-sex couples were much more likely to share childcare duties.” In fact, we’re almost twice as likely to divvy up tasks associated with parenting. The study showed nearly 74% of LGBTQ+ couples “shared routine childcare and 62% shared sick childcare.” For straight couples, just 38% split childcare and 32% sick care duties.
Since Kelly stayed home with the boys when they were little — doing the heavy lifting — my childcare “jobs” included bath time, reading to them, and bedtime. Yes, I changed my fair share of diapers. No, I didn’t pull my weight when it came to potty training.
But we designed a system that worked for us as parents. In the FT story, Professor Goldberg added, “if we have the freedom to explore what we like and are good at, or at least don’t hate, then there is more room for enacting arrangements that are pleasing, or at least tolerable.”
I think our system had a lot to do with how we viewed the job of parenting; we were in it together. Indeed, Full Spectrum Therapy’s Skye added, “Viewing household responsibilities as a partnership rather than a set of tasks fosters a sense of teamwork and shared goals.”
I didn’t mind that those former colleagues decided I was the “girl” because I cooked. What bugged me was that I didn’t get any man points for being the spider killer in the house. Q
BY DANNE WITKOWSKI
have long had nothing but contempt for Log Cabin Republicans. But after reading LCR President Charles Moran’s opinion piece in Newsweek , my immediate response was, “Oh, fuck off.”
The Trump Administration was one of the most anti-LGBTQ+ administrations in history. Everyone from his Secretary of Education (Betsy Devos) to his Secretary of Health and Human Services (Alex Azar) were open opponents to LGBTQ+ equality. Trump appointed Supreme Court justices who were all too happy to overturn Roe v. Wade and will no doubt overturn 2015’s marriage equality ruling as soon as they get the chance.
And yet Moran warns that we shouldn’t “be fooled by Kamala Harris and Tim Walz’s attempt to reinvent themselves as moderate, pro-family, ‘not weird’ Democrats who simply stand for LGBT equality.”
The Harris-Walz ticket is the most pro-LGBTQ+ ticket probably ever. What, are they just TOO supportive of LGBTQ+ people?
Um, yes. According to Moran.
“Their agenda goes far beyond what our community has sought for decades, which is equality for LGBT Americans under the law,” Moran writes. “In reality, Harris and Walz are crusaders for a small but powerful cabal of the LGBT Left which wants to erase the concept of biological sex from society, expose young children to overtly sexualized and ideological content, and strip parents of their rights to make critical decisions about their children.”
Oh FFS. This kind of rhetoric, completely divorced from reality, is what I expect from the anti-LGBTQ+ right. Hearing it from a fellow gay is particularly disgusting.
If you’re not familiar with LCR, let me enlighten you. They’re predominantly rich, cisgender white men who are willing to embrace people who hate them in exchange for policies
that benefit the wealthy. They don’t reflect the majority of LGBTQ+ voters or support what is in the best interest of LGBTQ+ people in this country.
Moran continues, “To this radical sect, electing a Harris-Walz administration would be a crowning achievement. Make no mistake: If Harris wins in November, this wing of the LGBT Left wouldn’t just have a seat at the table. It’d be sitting at the head, free to quietly execute its agenda throughout the federal bureaucracy and the regulatory state with a stamp of approval from the Oval Office.”
Got it? If Harris wins, the gays are taking over. Based on no evidence other than right-wing fever dreams.
Of course, if Trump wins, the anti-LGBTQ+ right will, literally, take over. Based on Project 2025.
In a time of rampant anti-LGBTQ+ hate, especially for transgender people, LCR is saying, “Actually, the problem is transgender people existing and wanting to be treated with basic human dignity, not the people who want to legislate transgender people and queerness out of existence.”
Moran’s biggest issue is that of transgender youth, something that the right has decided is the biggest issue facing the nation. There’s a lot of talk, including by Moran, about children getting all kinds of gender-affirming surgery. You’ll remember that Trump himself said that children go to school and then come home a few days later having undergone such surgery — a thing that absolutely does not and is not happening. Children are not being operated on willy-nilly in service of “a small but powerful cabal of the LGBT Left.”
What’s lost in the “debate” over transgender youth (or adults for that matter) is the fact that we’re not talking about abstractions. We’re talking about very real people and their very real lives. Transgender young people are being being used as scapegoats by Republicans across the
country who are passing laws that negatively impact their lives and their families’ lives. And it’s driving up suicide rates.
Furthermore, Moran talks about how Harris and Walz are opposed to “efforts to keep gender identity ‘lessons’ out of young children’s classrooms, keep
overly sexualized content out of school libraries, and keep parents involved with the education of their children.”
He goes on to praise Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis’s “Don’t Say Gay” law. A law that mandates the erasure of LGBTQ+ people and content from public schools, as if LGBTQ+ students and parents don’t exist. As a lesbian parent, how are such laws not an infringement on my rights?
Moran also talks about trans athletes and how we need to protect girls sports and wants us to somehow believe that the party that has banned abortion in state after state and wants to ban abortion nationwide is somehow the party that gives a shit about girls and women.
LCR is a fringe group of people who care only about themselves. Their support of Trump makes a sick sort of sense. Q
D’Anne Witkowski is a writer living with her wife and son. She has been writing about LGBTQ+ politics for nearly two decades. Follow her on Twitter @MamaDWitkowski.
BY BLAIR HOWELL
community continues to make significant strides to increase visibility through positive representations in media and society. While visibility is crucial and can lead to greater understanding, it is not enough — and it comes with real risks to their safety.
Transgender individuals are more than four times as likely as cisgender people to experience violent victimization, including rape, sexual assault, aggravated or simple assault, and even death. Meanwhile, we watch in dismay as states pass or propose legislation that restricts trans freedoms and rights, while senseless violence against the community persists.
Just as straight allies once assisted in advocated for gay rights, it is now up to gays to stand in solidarity with and support the trans community. Trans Americans — who are, or will become, our friends, neighbors, coworkers, and family members — deserve an equal opportunity to succeed and thrive.
While the stories of trans men and women from Utah featured here cannot represent the entire trans population, their experiences of decision-making, living, and loving offer a glimpse into the lives of our trans brothers and sisters.
Edited for length and clarity.
PRONOUNS: he; AGE: ageless;
AGE YOU TRANSITIONED: 8-10; OCCUPATION: airline agent, business owner, founder of Glitter Foundation.
It wasn’t a choice. I resented hearing the “she” pronoun, so I decided to start living as a boy at age 8. I took advantage of the opportunity that my family moved to Boston, and no one knew me so it was a fresh start. I started using the name Johnny. The boys liked me and I lived in fear that my parents would “out” me to them. My clueless, loving parents chalked it up as my tomboy personality.
I decided to be upfront and told [work colleagues] I was transgender. It was 2007. They didn’t know how to deal with transgender employees so they advised me that I was to use the ladies’ room. This was the most stressful thing I’ve gone through. No eating or drinking so I don’t have to go to the bathroom. This lasted for years. I look 100 percent male.
If a woman saw me entering [a ladies’ restroom], she’d tell on me, and I’m pretty sure I had to be outed to please her. At this same time, [my employer] Delta got awards and commendations for being an open-minded, inclusive airline. That’s my horror story that I cannot forget.
LOVING
I’m a very social person and love events, parties, and being where the cool crowd is. I have some exceptional male gay friends. I have been in a long relationship and feel now is my time. I am not ready to partner up unless I meet someone special. I talk freely about being trans if the opportunity presents itself or for educational purposes, visibility, or support. Once in a while I feel left out if I know I wasn’t invited to something because I’m transgender. I wish it wasn’t that way but it is. I have tough skin and pretend it away. Some of the LGB community still has far to go accepting transgender people. I think a lot of these people don’t see us as human.
Jeri Brummett
PRONOUNS: she
AGE: 60s
AGE YOU TRANSITIONED: mid 50s
OCCUPATION: retired IT executive.
DECIDING
I transitioned late in life, in my mid50s. I had lived a very macho life but was having significant physical health issues related to chronic stress that was literally killing me. The concept of gender dysphoria was introduced
and explored by my medical team. I had questioned my gender as a young child but simply dealt with it by trying to man up. Actually, I thought all boys and men questioned their gender, and society just expected men to man up.
The more I accepted my gender dysphoria, my stress hormone levels dropped toward normal. I chose to pursue a course of evidence-based, gender-conforming care, which included female hormone therapy, social/legal transition, and some gender-conforming surgeries over a period of about three years.
My life is really pretty good. I am blessed with family, friends, and opportunities to be of service in my community and state. Moreover, my spouse, family, and many long-term friends and acquaintances report that I am a nicer, calmer, person and much easier to get along with. I am more content within myself, and others report I am more comfortable to be around. So many natal women have freely offered me their friendship and support.
Often, just meeting, engaging, and getting to know a trans person like myself is enough to change perceptions. Hardcore bigots and haters, in my experience, are unwilling to meaningfully engage.
My experiences seem to be pretty positive, and I seem to be generally accepted in public situations in Utah. Being involved for many years prior to transition in Utah politics, I have had some really ugly experiences with some Utah political leaders both to my face and behind my back.
I developed deeper and more meaningful friendships. My romantic life is limited to my long-term spouse, and our marriage is stronger than ever.
I am more intrested in being seen as part of the larger LGTBQ+ community. I am concerned with attempts to drive wedges between the various letters. Historically, we have been hated and oppressed as a group. Our strength and future safety are dependent upon our solidarity and mutual support.
PRONOUNS: he/him
AGE: 45
AGE YOU TRANSITIONED: 39 / 40
OCCUPATION: program director, Utah House District 4 legislature candidate.
I grew up in small-town Wyoming. I was in the closet for a long time, married with a husband and two kids, when I first realized I was attracted to women. But I was not a lesbian, though I didn’t have the words yet to explain why that distinction mattered. I was dating a woman and realized that I felt as inauthentic in a lesbian relationship as I had when I was married to my husband because there was a disconnect between who I was and how I looked. All my life I had tried to make my brain conform to my body. I realized that I could instead have my physical presentation match my soul and my brain. I took my time transitioning, making sure each step was right for me, and exploring all explanations for what I was feeling. With each step I was able to relax further into myself, feeling less disjointed, growing more and more integrated.
Before I transitioned and before I came out as queer, I was living a numb life. I achieved the things I was supposed to achieve — family, house, career, savings — but I wasn’t really living. I was
hiding and going through the motions.
After transitioning — and simultaneously journeying to understand my faith — I feel more alive, I am experiencing more of life’s ups and downs, the joys, pleasures, and pains of really going after my dreams and living my life authentically with integrity. I have greater empathy for others going on their own journeys of self-understanding. We are all human, we all want to belong, to have purpose, freedom, and the ability to reach our dreams. I’m learning patience, first with myself, and also with others. It took me a long time to understand and give myself permission to take care of my own needs.
As humans, it can take us a while to process change, understand it, and make room for it. I’ve found when I’m patient and give people space and time to learn and grow, they often respond more positively than I could ever imagine or hope for. I am grateful for this experience of transitioning as it has made me more confident, patient, and compassionate. I hope that people can take courage from my story and use it to help themselves become the person they want to be.
It is so much easier to interact with people socially now, as I can relax into being myself instead of trying to fit into expectations that never worked for me. Online dating is a challenge, as I think it is for most 40-something parents post-divorce. I have a much clearer understanding of who I am and what I can bring
to a relationship, and I look forward to finding a partner to share in the adventures and the simple pleasures of life.
STAGE NAME: London Skie
PRONOUNS: she/her/goddess
AGE: 31
AGE YOU TRANSITIONED: Technically I think I came out at 23, but I’ve been transitioning all my life!
OCCUPATION: health benefit specialist.
Growing up LDS in rural Montana on the reservation, transitioning was not
something that was widely known about. I moved to Utah in 2012 and began my drag career, which really opened my eyes to the queer community as a whole. In 2015 I had a very tragic event in my life: I lost a family member to suicide, and that really was my catalyst as I realized I was not living my own truth. I started socially transitioning in 2015 and medically in 2017, although you could say I’ve been transitioning my entire life as it is a very introspective and bare truth kind of journey that once you look back, you go, “Duuuuuh, I was trans the whole time!”
Munroe Bergdorf, a transgender activist and model, once said, “To me, transness is divinity in its purest sense” and I agree with that wholeheartedly. Transitioning is a very personal and spiritual experience, you not only change physically but also mentally as well. It requires radical love and radical acceptance. Transitioning is my guiding star and saving grace. I never question it, and I never look back or regret my decision to be me unapologetically. You will experience the best and worst of people, but as long as you keep to your truth as your compass, you will never stray from the path of the life you were meant to live.
The friends I have made since transitioning, the community, and the sisterhood I have found is simply transcendent in its connection. Romance is something else entirely due to the massive
stigma, homophobia, and transphobia that surrounds transgender women in the media. Finding a man in his divine masculine that rises above societal views and expectations is the holy grail for me, and I’m still searching. I think the most important thing is simply safety. However, it is my belief that although sometimes ignorant, most people are not intrinsically cruel but actually curious of how to interact with the beautiful daughters of the universe that transgender women are.
PRONOUNS: he/they
AGE: 44
AGE YOU TRANSITIONED: I came out as omni-gender at 23, identified as transgender at 27, and began my medical transition at 32. I don’t consider myself “fully transitioned” because I believe the journey continues until we leave this earth
OCCUPATION: BlendEd learning coordinator, freelance graphic designer, writer, leader/ advocate.
It wasn’t a straightforward or easy process — it was more about survival. I had faced some deep personal challenges and, through therapy, started to understand
myself better. One pivotal moment was when my therapist asked me to find a song that resonated with my feelings. I chose “Things Are What You Make of Them” by Bishop Allen. That song helped me realize that the “she” I had been living as for 23 years had endured enough and was ready to let the real me emerge.
Starting hormone-replacement therapy marked the beginning of finally seeing myself in the mirror. As I transitioned, I began to experience moments of joy that I will carry with me forever. I remember the first time I saw my flat chest after top surgery and finally feeling free, like a caged bird taking flight. Transitioning isn’t easy. It’s expensive, and we face significant gatekeeping. The hoops we jump through are exhausting, but the moments when we achieve something that brings us closer to our authentic selves are worth celebrating.
My transition has caused me to lose friends who couldn’t accept me for who I am. I’ve had to distance myself from toxic people, but it’s been necessary for my mental health. I’m rebuilding relationships with family.
Relationships are always work, whether you’re trans or not. I’m with someone who loves me for who I am. We both identify as pansexual, but the world often sees us as a straight couple. Our relationship is based on our love for each other’s hearts and minds, and that’s what truly matters. Q
Respect names and pronouns. Listen and trust trans people on their identities and experiences. Ask educated questions and do your own research.
Recognize your privilege and use it for good. Don’t worry about what rest rooms people use.
Follow thought leaders in the trans community.
Be careful about confidentiality and “outing.” Use gender-neutral, inclusive language. Challenge transphobia and don’t tolerate disrespect. Q
Transgender Day of Remembrance, also known as TDOR, is an annual observance on November 20 that honors the memory of the transgender people whose lives were lost in acts of anti-transgender violence.
Locally, transgender activist Dallas Rivas has researched and produced a list of transgender deaths in the United States. He also produces Utah’s TDOR memorial, now run by his The Glitter Foundation, to commemorate the lives of transgender deaths worldwide. This year the memorial will honor and read aloud the names and stories of 270 (at press time) victims,
Allen O Donnell
20 / BROCKPORT / N.Y. / OCT 1, 2023 / SUICIDE
Sylar Harrison
Reeves
30 / WASH., D.C. / OCT 2, 2023 / FOUND DEAD
Chyna Long
30 / MILWAUKEE / WISC. / OCT 8, 2023 / SHOT
Rani Baker
PORTLAND, ORE. / OCT 8, 2023 / SUICIDE
Cris Velazquez
37 / PHILADELPHIA, PA. / OCT 12, 2023 / SUICIDE
Dominic
Dupree
25 / CHICAGO / OCT 13, 2023 / SHOT
A’nee Roberson
30 / WASH., D.C. / OCT 14, 2023 / RUN OVER ESCAPING ATTACKER
River Paige
Olmsted
17 / LANCASTER, PA. / OCT 16, 2023 / SUICIDE
Lisa Love
Turman
35 / CHICAGO / OCT 17, 2023 / SHOT
London Price
26 / MIAMI-DADE, FLA. / OCT 23, 2023 / SHOT
Mya Finch
36 / BOSTON, MASS. / OCT 24, 2023
Naomi McNew
KOKOMO, IN. / OCT
30, 2023 / SUICIDE
Lola LaPerla Ebony McDaniels
NEWARK, N.J. / NOV 8, 2023
KeJuan
Richardson
21 / TOLEDO, OHIO / NOV 14, 2023 / SHOT
Amiri Jean Reid
21 / TOLEDO, OHIO / NOV 14, 2023 / SHOT
Shandon Floyd
20 / COLUMBIA, S.C. / NOV 14, 2023
Savannah Ryan
Williams
38 / MINNEAPOLIS / NOV 29, 2023 / SHOT
Madison
Montana
26 / LOS ANGELES / NOV 29, 2023 / SUICIDE
Care Hansen
21 / RIVERTON, UTAH / DEC 14, 2023 / SUICIDE
“Each day Care survived was a victory,” read her obituary. “and we are So. Very. Grateful. for each and every one of those days that we were blessed to have Care in our lives.” “Our amazing, beautiful, and so very
and celebrate the 25th anniversary of the transgender flag.
“They say you die twice. The one time when you stop breathing and a second time, a bit later on, when somebody says your name for the last time,” the event invitation reads, quoting Banksy.”
Details of the event will be on the group’s Facebook and Instagram pages.
Below, we show the names, faces, ages, locations, and cause of death of transgender victims of violence in the United States. We highlight three stories of Utah deaths.
loved first-born child, sister, grandchild, and friend was a warrior who valiantly fought a long, difficult battle with mental illness and tried so hard to stay with us as long as possible.”
Tripp Schultz
31 / SALT LAKE CITY / DEC 18, 2023 / SUICIDE
“To know Tripp was to immediately love Tripp. He had a smile that lit up the room, and a booming contagious laugh that instantly drew people to want to meet him. He was a fiercely loyal friend to anyone he met and would go to the ends of the Earth to help and protect those in need. Tripp was a strong advocate, participating in peaceful protests and shielding members of his community; He could be found joyously participating in LGBTQIA+ celebrations and advocating for the queer community.” (Obituary)
Amber Minor
40 / RAYTOWN, MO. / DEC 24, 2023 / SHOT
Meghan Riley Lewis
Lexus Walker
/ NORFOLK, VA. / DEC 30, 2023 / KILLED BY DRUNK DRIVER Kitty Monroe
/ PHOENIX,
Hill
35 / ATLANTA, GA. / FEB 29 / SHOT
Reyna Hernandez
54 / RENTON / WASH. / MAR 2 / SHOT
Diamond Brigman
36 / HOUSTON, TEXAS / MAR 16 / SHOT
Alex Franco
21 / LEHI, UTAH / MAR 19 / SHOT
“Alex was very strong willed, loved to laugh, which would light up the room with his beautiful smile. He was funny, a protector, and had a heart of gold. Alex’s personality shined from the inside out. He sure knew how to dress and make an outfit work from his hats to his shoes and finishing touches with his jewelry. Alex lived his life without fear and was compassionate about the people he loved. Alex has earned his place among the Franco men. This is a testament to his strength and sacrifice to the ones he loved unconditionally.” (Obituary)
Meraxes Medina
24 / LOS ANGELES / MAR 20 / SHOT
Yella Clark
45 / ANGOLA, LA. / APRIL 2 / KILLED IN CUSTODY
Tee Arnold
36 / HALLANDALE BEACH, FLA. / APRIL 3 / SHOT
River Neveah
Goddard
17 / STOW, MASS. / APRIL 5 / STABBED
Basil Brown
21 / LAFAYETTE, LA. / APRIL 7 / SUICIDE
Starr Brown
28 / MEMPHIS, TENN. / APRIL 19 / SHOT
Andrea Doria
Dos Passos
37 / MIAMI, FLA. / APRIL 23 / BEATEN
Allister
Matthews
17 / LOCKPORT, ILL. / APRIL 29 / SUICIDE
Darri Moor
23 / ST GENEVIEVE, MO. / MAY 1
Niomi Jenkins
SAN FRANCISCO / MAY 1
Kita Bee
46 / KANSAS CITY, MO. / MAY 3 / HIT AND RUN
Jazlynn Johnson
18 / LAS VEGAS MAY 6 / SHOT
Michelle Henry
25 / SAN FRANCISCO / MAY 15 / STABBED AND STRANGLED
Tayy Dior
Thomas 17 / MOBILE, ALA. / MAY 17 / SHOT
Saanti Bonét
Valentino
36 / CHICAGO / JUNE 1
Liara Kaylee
Tsai
35 / MINNEAPOLIS, MINN. / JUNE 22 / STABBED
Pauly Likens
14 / SHARPSVILLE, PA. / JUNE 23 / STABBED AND DISMEMBERED
Kenji Zemonta Spurgeon
23 / SEATTLE, WASH. / JULY 1 / SHOT
Shannon Boswell
30 / ATLANTA, GA. / JULY 2 / SHOT AND RUN OVER
Monique Brooks
49 / ORLANDO, FLA. / JULY 19 / SHOT
Dylon Gurley
20 / DENTON, TEXAS / JULY 23 / BEATEN, STABBED AND STRANGLED
Levi Castillo
15 / SPRINGFIELD, MO. / JULY 27
Vanity Williams
34 / HOUSTON, TEXAS / AUG 3 / SHOT
Tai’Vion Lathan
24 / BALTIMORE, MD. / AUG 4 / SHOT
Indiana Grayson
27 / WINTERVILLE, N.C. / AUG 23 / SUICIDE
Baxter Hawk
SAN DIEGO, CALIF. / AUG 31 / CARDIAC ISSUES
Kassim Omar
29 / COLUMBUS, OHIO / SEP 6 / SHOT
Barbie Iceland (Redd China)
CHICAGO / SEP 8 / SHOT
Chili Pepper CHICAGO / SEP 11
M. Tapia
52 / DENVER, COLO. / JUNE 23 / SHOT
REVIEW BY TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER
BY OLIVER RADCLYFFE, C.2024, ROXANE BOOKS / GROVE ATLANTIC, $28, 352 PAGES
Finding your own way.
It’s a rite of passage for every young person, a necessity on the path to adulthood. You might have had help with it. You might have listened to your heart alone on the quest to find your own way. And sometimes, as in the new memoir, “Frighten the Horses” by Oliver Radclyffe, you may have to find yourself first.
If you had observed Oliver Radclyffe in a random diner a few years ago, you’d have seen a blonde, bubbly, but harried mother with four active children under age seven and a distracted husband. You probably wouldn’t have seen trouble, but it was there.
“Nicky,” as Radclyffe was known then, was simmering with something
BY SAM KELLEY-MILLS
ARIES March 20–April 19
The best way to feel healthy is to be healthy. Eat good food, think good thoughts, and surround yourself with supportive friends. The better you live, the better you’ll feel.
TAURUS Apr 20–May 20
Nothing is worse than forgetting to do something crucial. Make some lists for yourself to keep your agendas aligned. There’s nothing more satisfying than getting a grip.
GEMINI May 21–June 20
No matter where you come from, there is always a place among friends and family. Dive into some really good
that was just coming to the forefront.
As a young child, Nicky’d been raised in comfort in a family steeped in genteel British wealth, attended a private allgirl’s school, and never wanted for anything. She left all that behind as a young adult, and embraced the biker lifestyle and everything it entailed. The problem now wasn’t that she missed her old ways, it was that she hated life as a wife and mother. Her dreams were filled with fantasies of “exactly who I was: a man on a motorbike, in love with a woman.”
But being a man? No, that wasn’t quite right.
It took every bit of courage she had to say she was gay, that she thought constantly about women, that she hated sex with men. When she told her husband, he was hurt but mostly unbothered, insisting that she tell absolutely no one. They could remain married and just go forward. Nothing had to change.
But everything had already changed for Nicky.
Once she decided finally to come out, she learned that friends had already suspected. Family was supportive. It would be okay. But as Nicky began to experiment with a newfound freedom to be with women, one thing became clear:
conversations or have some amazing love-making sessions.
CANCER June 21–July 22
If there was ever a time for change, this is it. The world is finally starting to show a side that makes you pause and wonder what is happening. It’s time to make it work.
LEO July 23–August 22
An abundance of opportunity can open doors. Remember to prove your worth! There is always someone to compete with. Balance modesty and take pride in accomplishments.
VIRGO August 23–Sep 2
Priorities are good to have, don’t allow them to trap you in a method that isn’t working. Adapt and do what the moment requires. A relationship can bloom with some help.
having sex with a woman was better when she imagined doing it as a man.
In his opening chapter, author Oliver Radclyffe shares an anecdote about the confusion the father of Radclyffe’s son’s friend had when picking up the friend. Readers may feel the same sentiment.
Fortunately, “Frighten the Horses” gets better... and it gets worse. Radclyffe’s story is riveting, told with a voice that’s distinct, sometimes poker-faced, but compelling; you’ll find yourself agreeing with every bit of his outrage and befuddlement with coming out in a way that feels right. When everything falls into place, it’s a relief for both author and reader.
And yet, it’s hard to get to this point because this memoir is just too long. It lags where you’ll wish it doesn’t. It feels like being burrito-wrapped in a heavy-weighted blanket: you don’t necessarily want out, but you might get tired of being in it.
Still, it remains that this peek at transitioning, however painful, is essential reading for anyone who needs to understand how someone figures things out. If that’s you, then consider “Frighten the Horses” and find it. Q
LIBRA Sept 23–October 22
It is possible to fall and get up, but the pain of doing so should be avoided. There seems to be some confusion over what is important. Step back from a situation and assess.
SCORPIO Oct 23–Nov 21
What makes sense to you baffles someone else. Don’t let this discrepancy become an issue. Agree to disagree. Much can be learned from trying out multiple positions.
SAGITTARIUS
Nov 22–December 20
A task feels like pushing a hard rock uphill. Break up a burden and tackle it a little bit at a time. Examine a clear goal and make changes. You are the master of major destiny.
Dec 21–Jan 19
There is no perfect situation, no matter how amazing a change may seem at the time. Don’t be quick to go back to the old way. Embrace fluidity and get ahead of the game.
AQUARIUS Jan 20–Feb 18
Romantic feelings could develop with a casual friend. Not much has changed, but a little change in the heart can create a big difference. Put faith in feelings and enjoy the ride.
PISCES Feb 19–Mar 19
Don’t fear asking for help from a buddy. Learn new ways to accomplish goals. A financial situation takes a toll, so get your affairs in order. Put the goal first and adapt.
50 Organ pleasured by Bernstein 51 This way 52 Caesar’s 502
Ginsberg, who wrote “Howl”
of
Nautical
20 Start of a quote from 62-Across from his DNC
Sine non 54 Org. for Evan Wolfson’s peers 55 Deserves 58 Grecian vessel 59 Poet Angelou and namesakes
62 Secretary of Transportation Pete 64 Billie Holiday’s “God the Child” 65 Personal lubricant ingredient 66 Composer Thomas
Izzard of stand-up
Sal Mineo, in “Rebel Without a Cause”
Do-overs for Amelie Mauresmo
1 Steely Dan’s “___ Lied”
2 Spread out on the breakfast table
3 Like Mae West’s smile
4 Jack of “Some Like It Hot”
5 Erotic diarist Nin
6 S&M unit
7 Help with the heist
8 Degree for Andrew Tobias
9 Deep-toned woodwinds
10 Recesses for Rev. Michael Piazza
11 Stick it in again
12 A doily signals this
13 Queer, long ago
21 Stare open-mouthed
23 Fetish of a mauve hanky carrier
25 Bucks prefix
26 “Modern Family” family member
27 Latina writer Castillo
29 Arctic tool
30 “The Elements of Bridge” author
33 Tops of houses
34 Half of a Hollywood name
36 Round-buyer’s words
39 “Va-va-va-___!”
41 Have to have
42 Part of YSL
43 Fruits with navels, maybe
44 Like a Traci Des Jardins dish on fire
45 Coarsely jocular
46 Gave the thumbs-up
47 Susie Bright, once
48 Word after quick or dim
BUSINESS
LGBTQ+ Affirmative
Therapists Guild
lgbtqtherapists.com
* jim@lgbtqtherapists.com
Utah LGBTQ+ Chamber of Commerce
utahlgbtqchamber.com
* info@utahgaychamber.com
Utah Independent Business Coalition
utahindependentbusiness.org
801-879-4928
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
National Domestic Violence Hotline
1-800-799-7233
YWCA of Salt Lake
ywcautah.org
322 E 300 S 801-537-8600
HEALTH & HIV
Planned Parenthood
bit.ly/ppauslchiv
654 S 900 E 801-322-5571
Salt Lake County Health Dept STD Clinic
slco.org/health/ std-clinic/
610 S 200 E, 2nd Floor
Walk-ins M-F 8a-5p Appts 385-468-4242
UAF Legacy Health
uafhealth.org
150 S 1000 E 801-487-2323
Weber-Morgan Health
Mon., Weds 1-4:30p 477 23rd St, Ogden Appt 801-399-7250
HOMELESS SVCS
VOA Homeless Youth Resource Ctr, ages 15—21
880 S 400 W 801-364-0744
LEGAL
Rainbow Law Free Clinic
2nd Weds 6-7:30pm Olpin Student Union, Panorama East probono@law.utah.edu
POLITICAL
Equality Utah
equalityutah.org
* info@equalityutah.org
376 E 400 S 801-355-3479
Utah Libertarian Party
129 E 13800 S #B2-364 libertarianutah.org 866-511-UTLP
Utah Stonewall Democrats
utahstonewalldemocrats.org
fb.me/ utahstonewalldems
SPIRITUAL
First Baptist Church
firstbaptist-slc.org
11a Sundays
777 S 1300 E 801-582-4921
Mt. Tabor Lutheran Church
10:30a Sunday worship
175 S 700 E 801-328-0521
mttaborslc.org
Sacred Light of Christ
slcchurch.org
823 S 600 E 801-595-0052
11a Sundays
The Divine Assembly
thedivineassembly.org
10am Sunday worship
389 W 1830 S, 11am meditation, 12pm 532 E 800 N, Orem SOCIAL
Alternative Garden Club
utahagc.org/clubs/ altgardenclub/
1 to 5 Club (bisexual)
fb.com/ groups/1to5clubutah
blackBOARD
Men’s Kink/Sex/BDSM education, 1st, 3rd Mons.
blackbootsslc.org
blackBOOTS Kink/BDSM
Men’s leather/kink/ fetish/BDSM 4th Sats.
blackbootsslc.org
Dudes Movie Night
Fourth Thursday Dinner and Social fb.com/ groups/312955669422305/
Mindfully Gay
mindfullygay.com
OWLS of Utah (Older, Wiser, Lesbian Sisters)
bit.ly/owlsutah
qVinum Wine Tasting
qvinum.com
Seniors Out and Proud
fb.me/soaputah
* info@soaputah.org 801-856-4255
Temple Squares Square Dance Club
templesquares.org
801-449-1293
Utah Bears
utahbears.com
fb.me/utahbears
* info@utahbears.com
6pm Weds Beans & Brews
906 S 500 E
Utah Male Naturists
umen.org
fb.me/utahmalenaturists
* info@umen.org
Utah Pride Center
utahpridecenter.org
* info@utahpridecenter.org
1380 S Main St
801-539-8800
Venture OUT Utah
bit.ly/GetOutsideUtah
Cheer Salt Lake
cheersaltlake.com
QUAC — Queer Utah
Aquatic Club
quacquac.org
* questions@ quacquac.org
Salt Lake Goodtime
Bowling League
bit.ly/slgoodtime
Stonewall Sports SLC
fb.me/SLCStonewall
stonewallsaltlakecity. leagueapps.com 385-243-1828
Utah Gay Football League
fb.me/UtahGayFootballLeague
Venture Out Utah
facebook.com/groups/ Venture.OUT.Utah
SUPPORT
Alcoholics Anonymous
801-484-7871
utahaa.org
LGBT meetings: Sun. 3p Acceptance Group, All Saints Episcopal Church, 1710 Foothill Dr
Tues. 7p Live & Let Live, Mt Tabor Lutheran, 175 S 700 E
Wed. 7p Sober Today, 1159 30th St , Ogden Wed. 7p Bountiful Men’s Group, Am. Baptist Btfl Church, 1915 Orchard Dr, Btfl Fri. 7p Stonewall Group, Mt Tabor Lutheran, 175 S 700 E
Crystal Meth Anon
crystalmeth.org
USARA, 180 E 2100 S Clean, Sober & Proud Sun. 1:30pm Leather Fetish & Kink Fri. 8:30pm
Genderbands
genderbands.org fb.me/genderbands
LifeRing Secular Recovery
801-608-8146
liferingutah.org
Weds. 7pm, How was your week? First Baptist Church, 777 S 1300 E
Sat. 11am, How was your week? First Baptist Church, 777 S 1300 E
LGBTQ+ Affirmative Therapists Guild lgbtqtherapists. com
* robin@lgbtqtherapists.com
YOUTH/COLLEGE
Encircle LGBTQ Family and Youth Resource Ctr
encircletogether.org
fb.me/encircletogether
91 W 200 S, Provo, 190 S 100 E, St. George 331 S 600 E, SLC
Gay-Straight Alliance Network
gsanetwork.org
OUT Foundation BYU
theout.foundation
fb.me/theOUTfoundation
Salt Lake Community College LGBTQ+ slcc.edu/lgbtq/
University of Utah LGBT Resource Center
lgbt.utah.edu
200 S Central Campus
Dr Rm 409, M-F, 8a-5p 801-587-7973
USGA at BYU
usgabyu.com
fb.me/UsgaAtByu
Utah State Univ. Inclusion Ctr
usu.edu/inclusion/ Utah Valley Univ Spectrum
linktr.ee/ spectrumqsa
uvu.edu/lgbtq/ * lgbt@uvu.edu
801-863-8885
Liberal Arts, Rm 126
Weber State University
LGBT Resource Center
weber.edu/ lgbtresourcecenter
Shepherd Union Suite 323 Dept. 2117
801-626-7271
Westminster Student Diversity Center
Bassis 105, M-F 8a-5p
bit.ly/westdiversity
Our Vision is to reduce social isolation and loneliness, improve the health and well-being of older adults and to empower them to lead meaningful and connected lives in which they are engaged and participating in the community. Our Mission is to reimagine aging by empowering older adults to live life to the fullest potential guided by these five pillars:
• Cherish the Journey
• Encourage the Body
Recent events: Snowshoeing, Bingo, Valentines Pot Luck & Dance, Movie Night, Walking Groups, Theater groups
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‘We all need a Will’
Will Ferrell and his longtime friend Harper Steele, who came out as trans in 2021, discuss how their road-trip movie aims to inspire allyship
BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI
Theinfluence of softhearted straight male allies for the LGBTQ+ community is gaining momentum in the era of Tim Walz. We can now count universally beloved comic actor Will Ferrell among those heterosexual men who, confident in their own identities, use their platforms to support and uplift marginalized groups.
Ferrell leads by example in “Will & Harper,” a documentary that emerged after his friend of 30 years, Harper Steele, came out as transgender in 2021 after decades spent in the closet. Ferrell and Steele met while working on “Saturday Night Live” — Steele as head writer for four years, and Ferrell as a main cast member from 1995 until 2002. Eventually, the two worked together at Funny or Die, where Steele was creative director, and Ferrell acted in two films she co-wrote: the Spanish-language comedy-western “Casa de mi Padre” and 2020’s “Eurovision Song Contest: The Story of Fire Saga.”
Now, in “Will & Harper,” directed
by Josh Greenbaum (“Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar”) and coming to Netflix on Sept. 27, the two set out on a cross-country road trip, where Steele seeks to explore her identity in a country that doesn’t always embrace her. “I love it so much,” she says early in the film about the U.S. “I just don’t know if it loves me back right now.”
Meanwhile, Ferrell, who told Variety earlier this year when the film debuted at Sundance that he had “zero knowledge” about the trans community, aims to deepen his understanding of his friend’s journey. On their own, the widespread appeal of Ferrell’s films such as “Old School,” “Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy” and “Step Brothers” suggests that “Will & Harper” could attract a diverse range of potential allies who may be unsure where to begin. If there’s a lesson here, it might be that allyship can start in something as simple as a station wagon.
In a video interview with Ferrell and Steele during the film’s premiere at the
Toronto International Film Festival, Ferrell was genuinely moved just knowing he might make a difference. “Oh, that’s so nice,” he said, after I mentioned the significance of him being a queer-supportive straight guy who models sensitivity and unconditional love, admitting I felt like I was lacking men like him growing up. But it was Steele who truly understood: “We all need a Will,” she added, leaning into her buddy during our interview, their decades of friendship on display in one brief, heartfelt embrace.
As of now, Will, how aware are you that this film might influence your fans’ perspectives and foster compassion toward trans individuals? Will Ferrell: I think we’re getting a sense of that. I mean, it’s something, once Harper said, “OK, you know what? Let’s do it,” that was probably the second part of the conversation — that she articulated the fact this is something that will help [her], but she brought up the great point of exposing that part of my audience that maybe wouldn’t be inclined to even investigate anything like this. I think that’s really exciting. I think that’s really exciting that that is a potential. And yeah, I’ve already gotten feedback that, I would say, a surprising segment of my audience that you wouldn’t have thought would have any interest
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is really interested in watching this. Considering how some of your fans may feel about the trans community, did it feel like a risk to make this film? Harper Steele: I don’t think Will cares about that sort of risk. That’s what I think. I brought that up early. Again, I brought up many times that Will is a brand as well as a human being. Bud Light did not fare well when they associated themselves with a trans person. But I don’t think that enters into Will’s mindset at all, really.
FERRELL : This is the advantage when you’re at the tail end of your career and you’re just coasting. [Laughs.]
STEELE : [Deadpans.] He wouldn’t have done it, I guess.
FERRELL : [Sarcastically joking] Oh, no. Even a year ago, two years ago, I wouldn’t have done it. I was hot! I think in the most healthy way, once I make a decision, I don’t look back. Whether that’s a bizarre comedic premise or, whatever it is, even in my day to day. This was another case of, OK, there’s going to be a positive response and a negative response. Whatever potential fallout that could be directed my way, I’m not really concerned. I’m not concerned at all. To me, you are like the Tim Walz of cinema. We’ve got Will and we’ve got Tim standing up for the LGBTQ+ community. Harper, I was wondering if you could talk about how you feel about men like Will, and even Gov. Walz, both of whom embody a positive example of tender masculinity that challenges the traditional notions of toxic masculinity.
STEELE : I’m not positive that it’s a new phenomenon. In fact, I almost think toxic masculinity is a newer phenomenon. I think people are threatened by trans people, by queer people, by women, and so
this sort of toxic nature has grown a little bit out of this. I think the basic component is men who are not threatened by something they’re hiding themselves maybe, or something that they’re afraid of, or that is unknown. They are generally good people and they don’t either care about me or they’d like to meet me and talk to me. Almost all of the men in my life who are straight cis men are the kinds of people who are comfortable with being themselves. I’m not going to say this about every toxic male, that they’re not comfortable being themselves. I do think that that kind of mentality, as women’s rights grew and as more queer people became present, the unknown and the scariness of that seemed to ratchet up.
How do you think telling stories like this one can shape American attitudes toward trans individuals and potentially impact pro-trans versus anti-trans legislation?
STEELE : For us, I think it’s just a hope. I’m not sure we are confident that we can. But for me personally, and I won’t speak for Will, to lead by example is the way to get to that change. I’m not super strident, though I can be. I think this is a great example of allyship. And it’s a funny movie, so maybe we can bring people in with that laughter and illustrate that allyship.
FERRELL : We talk about the email that Harper sent where she came out, and then there was a follow-up in which she said, “Look, I’m not a very political person, but just by nature of being trans, I’m now a political person in a way. I just ask you as my friends to stand up for me. Do your best to, if I’m misgendered, just speak up on my behalf, that’s all I ask.” This was the light bulb moment for me: “Oh, if I’m really going to walk
the walk here, maybe this is a way to do that and we could have a great time, and it would also be educational for me.” Just be that — lead by example. Show that civility still exists out there, not only between ourselves, but in the way we’re engaging with the world.
If there were to be a sequel, where do you envision you’d go together next?
FERRELL : I mean, where do you want to go? Saint-Tropez or something?
STEELE : Saint-Tropez, or I was thinking space.
FERRELL : Oh, space. Maybe space! Maybe we get stuck in space the same way these two astronauts’ eight-day trip has now turned into 80 days, or something like that.
STEELE : Yeah, we’ll be up there.
Looking back on the beginning of your friendship, is there a specific “SNL” sketch that you both worked on together that significantly strengthened your bond and brought you closer together?
STEELE: It’s a fraught environment. He was always fucking my sketches up.
FERRELL : On purpose. I [was] like, “I’m going to fix your wagon.”
STEELE : I was like, “This dumb actor.” No. [Laughs.]
FERRELL : You have to remember, there’s so much failure on that show that the bonding really comes from trying stuff at the rewrite table and getting the laugh in the room, but the host hated it, so it never got picked.
STEELE : Yeah, all the bonding happens with, like, “I love your sketch.” “I love yours.” Neither one of us is doing those sketches.
FERRELL : But let’s all go have a beer. I don’t think there was that lightbulb moment, that one sketch where we both were like, “That was so great.” But you get to know and trust and love each other through the process. Q
Chris Azzopardi is the editorial director of Pride Source Media Group and Q Syndicate. He has interviewed a multitude of superstars, including Cher, Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey, and Beyoncé. His work has also appeared in The New York Times, Vanity Fair, GQ and Billboard. Reach him via X @chrisazzopardi.
BY PETUNIA PAP SMEAR
road to the high school musical is fraught with danger and excitement. Participating in school plays was my escape from toiling in the potato fields. It was a way for me to envision the vast world that I suspected must exist beyond the mountains that surrounded our valley where I wouldn’t have to shovel sheep shit, hoe weeds, and move miles and miles of sprinkler pipe. But first and foremost, it was a somewhat socially acceptable reason to avoid being on the football team. Thus, in my junior year, I was cast as the lead character in our production of Where’s Charlie, a musical version of the play Charlie’s Aunt. The play is set in the 1890s when a young man needs a chaperone to date a girl. The chaperone aunt doesn’t arrive, so I must play the aunt to act as my own chaperone. Slapstick hijinks ensue. Since mine was a small high school of only 150 students, we did not have much of a budget for theater. We didn’t even have an auditorium, only a stage at the end of the gymnasium. We did not have a costume department, so my mother, who just so happened to be the Ward Relief Society president, made the dress I would wear in the play. Imagine that. My very religious Mormon mother made my first dress! But it was for school, so it must be okay. In this play, I was essentially playing two different characters — the young man and the chaperone aunt. The script required that I make 15 costume changes in and out of that dress. The director assigned one of the other cast members to be a dresser for me so that when I would come off stage, he would be holding the dress out for me, and I could just step into it. Then, while he fastened the back of my dress, I grabbed the wig and bonnet and tied them on my head. After much rehearsal, we figured that I got in and out of that dress about 180 times.
Thank goodness that glitter was not involved! Eventually, we were able to make a full costume change in 45 seconds. A skill that, later in life, I may or may not have found to be quite handy. Only my husband knows for sure. I was very nervous on opening night because this was my first time in a leading role. I was waiting in the wings for my cue in the first scene. Just as they delivered the line for my entrance onto the stage, my nerves got the better of me, and I felt a deep rumbling in my stomach. I began to wretch. You know, just like when you meet a guy in a dark alley and dive in to tickle his gizzard, and he hasn’t cleaned himself properly for weeks! Or so I’ve heard, wink, wink, nudge, nudge. I struggled to subdue this vomitous urge. I began to hurl. In desperation, I grabbed a vase that was a prop for the following scene and my dinner made an encore presentation into it. How very undignified for a princess in training. Late for my entrance, I finally stumbled out onto the stage and delivered my lines. All the while feeling very queasy and as if I might do an additional “technicolor yawn” on stage.
When that scene was finished, as I stepped off stage, the drama teacher rushed up to me in a panic and asked if I could continue. I said I think so. She told me to soldier on and that if I felt like I was going to spew chunks again, to just turn and walk off stage. They would close the curtain and call it a scene change. We resumed. But the vase containing my barf remained onstage, and every time I passed by it and caught a whiff of its contents, I very nearly tossed my cookies again. By the end of the third scene, someone had procured a bottle of paregoric, which any mother worth her cookies kept in their medicine cabinets to settle upset stomachs. I hastily grabbed the bottle and took a huge swig directly
from the bottle, probably at least four or five doses worth of the nasty stuff. Now, for those of you who are unfamiliar, paregoric is an opium-based medicine, unregulated at that time.
I began to feel some relief. After the next scene, I still felt a little queasy, so I took another gulp of the poppy potion. By the second act, I began to feel much better. In fact, quite giddy. Who knew that an overdose of this dreamer’s delight could cause you to get high? By the end of the third act, I had forgotten all about the vase and the smelly chunks it contained. I was higher than the proverbial kite. Miraculously, we all made it through to the curtain call. We received a standing ovation. Afterward, castmates regaled me with stories of my theatrical antics. Apparently, I was able to stay on script, but with much added silliness. The next night, without me being high, we did not get a standing-O! WELL, SHIT!
This story leaves us with several important questions:
1. What kind of zippers or buttons must I have to be able to change dresses in 45 seconds?
2. Are all the quick dress changes why I can’t decide what to wear?
3. How much slower would the changes have been if breasticles had been involved?
4. How can I acquire someone to be my dresser these days, and would I need to “put out”?
5. So, was it the dress or the narcotics that caused me to like drag?
6. Should I carry Narcan in my purse?
These and other eternal questions will be answered in future chapters of The Perils of Petunia Pap Smear. Q
