LIVE LEARN TEACH

By Talona Smith

Others may feel they experience what they deserve. People who received little or no affection in life or have been mistreated for so long don’t know how to feel anything else and tend to accept negative experiences as normal. At least, that is what their minds may lead them to believe.

Many people cope with life’s disappointment by burying what they don’t want to feel deep down on the inside. When in actuality, that strategy is only a temporary fix to a problem that could escalate to more severe problems. It can be an emotional volcano waiting to erupt and spill onto people who genuinely want to be a viable support system. Sometimes hurt, people hurt other people in hopes of transferring their pain onto them. That is not transferring pain from one to another. It is merely spreading pain amongst each other like a contagious disease.

Some even try to hide their true feelings from others because they feel that no one has the right solution to fix their problems, and encouragement can feel more irritating than helpful. They can feel stuck and do not know how to move forward. Another person’s opinion in a situation is only sometimes useful. When someone is struggling, they can’t always visualize the resolution that others outside of their circumstances may see. A person in emotional or mental pain sometimes goes out of their way to make loved ones happy…trying to prevent them from noticing how much they are hurting on the inside.

There are people who want to help you feel empowered genuinely. To believe in yourself and be the best version of yourself…one day at a time. The best version of yourself is not how society sees you. The best version of yourself loves yourself and honors yourself. Knowing that you are worthy, lovable, and valuable. The best version of you is working on your self-esteem, practicing self-love, and accepting self-compassion. Remember who you are while becoming the best version of yourself. Once you reach that goal, you can have the ability to handle situations that may arise.

If you feel broken, you don’t have to be alone. If you are silent or suspect someone else is, please reach out for help. No one may understand your pain, but some people desire to help you manage your pain. Reliving what you have imprisoned can be painful, emotional, stressful, and fearful. Sometimes getting past that first cry can be a start toward healing. Even if you don’t know what to do next, trained people want to help and support you.

To help lessen your problems. Let someone walk with you. We are our brothers’; and sisters’ keepers.

Growing up, fitting in always seemed like a struggle for me, and I felt like I had to change myself to fit into certain friend groups or to make me seem like less of a weird quiet kid. When I was younger, I was very much to myself and didn’t go out to hang out with other kids my age. I had extreme anxiety, which made me want to stay in the house most of the time. I would look at the other girls in school, thinking about ways to change myself so they would like me or think I was enough.

In elementary school, I always had a change of attitude that I thought got me somewhere in life, but it just made me miss out on real friends who just wanted me for me. That was always hard and confusing for me to handle. It was in middle school when I felt like my life had changed. It was a whole different change of space. At the age of 13, I started feeling depressed completely out of it and continuously having suicidal thoughts, thinking that no one could understand what I was going through and that everyone believed what I was saying was just me complaining or just repeating things I might see on social media, but that was how I actually felt so I just stayed quiet and kept to myself. I handled my pain on my own without any experience in how even to positively affect my mental health. I started to get mad at myself, crying every night and praying that God would lead me to the right path and make all these worries disappear.