BAR/BAT MITZVAH SERVICE OPTIONS AND OTHER COMPONENTS
Synagogue Service
Typical b’nei mitzvah service options include, but are not limited to, the following:
• Shabbat morning Monday and Thursday morning Torah services
• Women’s Tefillah
• Mincha/Maariv
• Havdalah at the conclusion of Shabbat
• Friday night services
• Siyum
• Rosh Chodesh
• Holiday services, for example:
• Reading of the Megillah on Purim (Esther) or Shavuot (Ruth)
• Candle lighting on Chanukah
D’var Torah
In addition, many children prepare a d’var torah to deliver at the conclusion of their service/ ceremony. These remarks may reflect on the importance of the weekly parasha, a chesed project, or other topics of relevance to the bar/bat mitzvah.
Siyum
You and your family may want to consider embarking upon a meaningful learning project to undertake together with your child, with the goal of making a siyum as a part of your celebration, or, perhaps in lieu of a party.
EDUCATIONAL PREPARATION
Each bar/bat mitzvah is unique and the manner in which you and your family choose to mark this milestone may be adapted to best suit your child. Below is a list of the aspects of the ceremony that students may opt to learn:
1. Tefillot (prayers)
2. Torah Trope
3. Torah Reading
4. Haftarah Reading
5. D’var Torah
Private Tutoring Options
Students who opt to read from the Torah often elect to work with a private tutor to prepare for their ceremony. Others have a family member or family friend who prepares with the student. Frequency and length of this preparation period can vary depending on the child but it is common to begin this process 12 months before the event.
Below are KJ clergy members who have experience working with Ramaz students.
Ashkenazi Tutors
Cantor Berson (KJ) cantor@ckj.org
Sephardi Tutors
Rabbi Meyer Laniado (KJ Sephardic) – rml@ckj.org
RESPECT FOR SHABBAT AND CHAGIM
We ask that you please remind your invited guests that the synagogue is a makom kadosh, a sacred space and the use of all electronic devices, including cell phones and cameras, are prohibited on Shabbat and Yom Tov. We also encourage families to share with their guests that wearing kippot for men and boys is a sign of respect for the service and the sanctity of the day. All married male guests are encouraged to wear a tallit. Married women are asked to wear a headcovering. It is common, although not required, for the bar/bat mitzvah family to provide kippot for men and head coverings for women.
TIMING OF SERVICES
On Shabbat morning, services begin promptly on time. Please urge all of your guests to arrive on time and remain throughout the service.
ISRAEL
Central to our Ramaz mission is our commitment to love and support the State of Israel. Marking your child’s milestone with a trip to Israel can be a meaningful way to celebrate, either in lieu of, or in addition to, a celebration closer to home.
LEARNING AND PREPARATION OPPORTUNITIES AT RAMAZ
Parent-Child Learning
Ramaz-KJ Father-Son Bar Mitzvah Program
• Fathers and sons (6th grade boys) have an opportunity to participate in experiential programs to explore what it means to come of age in Judaism.
• Topics to be explored are: tefillin, chesed, Shabbat, Torah learning and prayer.
• Please contact Rabbi Meyer Laniado at rml@ckj.org for more information.
MaTaN Mother-Daughter Bat Mitzvah Program
• Mothers and daughters (5th grade girls) have an opportunity to come together to meaningfully engage with Jewish learning and experiences in preparation for b’not mitzvah.
• Topics of study include: Torah study, women throughout Jewish history, chesed, Shabbat, and prayer.
• Please contact Rachel Kraus at rachel@ckj.org for more information.
CHESED OPPORTUNITIES
Engaging in a chesed project as your child works toward becoming a bar/ bat mitzvah is a tangible, meaningful way to celebrate one’s growth into adulthood and the taking on of mitzvot. Many organizations support our local or international Jewish communities, and others offer a broader range of contact by working with the wider world. These opportunities support our efforts to expand our students’ worldview, one of the four pillars of a Ramaz education.
Over the years, Ramaz Middle School students have participated in many wonderful chesed projects. Below is a sample of the meaningful projects that students from previous years have already undertaken. We hope these resources will inspire you and your family:
The Ariel Center
https://www.thearielcenter.org/
• Established in memory of Ariel Goldmsith z’’l (Ari), a dedicated IDF combat medic, the Ariel Center is a state-ofthe-art therapeutic sports and innovation facility being built in Southern Israel.
• The Center is dedicated to building resilience and empowerment and providing much needed therapies through sports throughout Israeli society, from youth to IDF reservists and their partners, as well as those on active duty.
Assure for the Children
https://www.assureforchildren.org/
• Assure for the Children is dedicated to providing support to the 40 children in Israel who were left orphaned of both parents during the horrific terror attacks on October 7, 2023.
• It is establishing trust funds for each child so that they can access the resources they need to traverse key life cycle events, such as Bar/Bat Mitzvahs, purchasing their first car, tuition for higher education and weddings.
Back on my feet
https://www backonmyfeet.org/
• They help homeless people get up again and help them find a job
• Students collected and donated sneakers and gloves for the homeless.
Beit Ruth
https://www.beitruth.com/
• Students raised money to build a professional space dedicated to music learning and therapy at Beit Ruth. Beit Ruth is a home in Afula, Israel, for 45 at-risk girls, ages 13 - 18, who have been removed from their family homes due to neglect and abuse.
• At Beit Ruth, girls from all different backgrounds and religions heal from past hardships, get a great education, and grow into healthy and empowered young adults. With a new space just for music education and therapy, the girls can discover hidden talents and practice skills they would otherwise never have the chance to uncover.
Belev Echad
https://belevechad.nyc/
• Provides emotional and social support for wounded IDF soldiers. They come on a trip to NY 4 times a year.
• Hosted Belev Echad soldiers to a Shabbat lunch and in Israel donated emotional support groups to help them heal.
• Participated in the fundraising bike ride “Bike 4 Belev Echad” by riding in a 25 mile bike race.
Beit Issie Shapiro
http://afobis.org
• Helps children with disabilities.
• Raised money so kids can learn to speak using eye gaze technology.
Bet Elazraki
http://www.elazraki.org/
• Children’s home for children who cannot live with their parents.
• Students raised money to redesign and refurbish of one of the recreation rooms for kids.
• Students ran a 12K to raise money to build a new sports center for Beit Elezraki children.
• Students went to Beit Elazraki and spent a few hours building a bond with the girls through jewelry making, singing, and more.
Friendship Circle
http://friendshipcirclenyc.org/
• Friendship Circle helps kids with special needs.
• Students created a Foul Shot Competition- for every shot that went in, $25 was donated to the friendship circle.
Haverut
http://www.haverut.org.il/
• Haverut works to promote a more healthy society in Israel by focusing on meeting the emotional and spiritual needs of those facing medical challenges.
• Haverut’s programming provides art, music and emotional support in hospitals throughout Israel as well as other populations in need.
• Students can raise money for art and music workshops in major hospitals throughout Israel.
• Students could come visit the art, therapy and music programs in Israel and work hands on at the hospitals or programs.
IDF Widows and Orphans
https://www.idfwo.org/en/
• IDF Widows and Orphans, a group that has been around for 30 some years helping to provide much needed services and support to widows and orphans of fallen soldiers.
• Specifically, they have recently launched a new bar/bat mitzvah project aimed at helping bar bat mitzvah age orphans or children whose parent has fallen with a variety of programming--support in school, a special camp that runs several times throughout the year, a trip to the US, access to tefillin and candlesticks, and more.
• They try to stay in the children’s lives from bar bat mitzvah age until those children themselves go off to the army.
• There are also opportunities for family members to volunteer in the recreational camps and interact with the kids.
Innovation Africa
https://www.innoafrica.org/
• We’re a nonprofit on a mission to bring innovative Israeli solar and water technologies to remote African villages.
• Money can be raised to bring running water, electricity, solar power and more to villages in Africa. One student went to Africa to watch the installation of a water source.
Israel ParaSport Center
https://israelparasport.org/mitzvah-projects
• The Israel ParaSport Center has been a pillar of physical rehabilitation for tens of thousands of Israelis since it was founded in 1960 in response to the polio epidemic. Over the years, it has evolved into a global leader in sport rehabilitation, offering a wide range of recreational and competitive adaptive sports to more than 3,000 individuals of all ages, annually.
• Participants engage in different sports, including swimming, dancing, and a variety of adaptive sports. Its programs cater to both recreational participants and elite athletes, with pathways to Paralympic training and international competition.
• Whether for a preschooler trying an adaptive sport or an adult training for the Paralympic Games, the Israel ParaSport Center is committed to helping each individual achieve their personal best, both on and off the field.
Met Council
https://www.metcouncil.org/
• Packed camp backpacks for kids who were getting scholarships to go to sleepaway camp.
MSAWI
http://MSAWI.org
• This organization makes care packages for Jewish American soldiers.
• Students organized that their grade packed 70 Shabbat/Chanukah boxes for Jewish soldiers abroad.
Mt. Sinai Kravis Children’s Hospital
https://giving.mountsinai.org/site/TR?fr_id=1091&pg=entry#start-fundraising
• This organization provides relief for children during long hospitalization.
• This program helps young patients cope with their fears by offering fun activities that meet their needs during long or stressful hospital stays. Some of the activities offered are play, art, school, and socializing with peers. For example, they have a Teen Art & Literary magazine that allows the teenagers in the Mount Sinai Kravis Children’s Hospital to have their original creative writing and artwork published.
Rising Heroes
https://rising-heroes.org
• Rising Heroes is dedicated to empowering reserve combat soldiers during their active service by equipping them with essential tools to process trauma and build mental resilience.
• Founded in response to the events of October 7, Rising Heroes seeks to prevent the development of PTSD and other traumas so that Israel’s heroes can continue their service with confidence and successfully reintegrate into civilian life.
Save a Child’s Heart
https://www.saveachildsheart.org
• It’s an Israeli organization that takes children from less privileged countries that can’t afford or don’t have the resources for heart surgery, regardless of race, gender, or religion, brings them to Israel, and performs life saving surgeries on them. They also get doctors to go to other countries and train people there to do heart surgery and give them resources for it.
• Student had a charity baseball game. People paid to play and at the game, they also sold Save a Child’s Heart merchandise and other fun things to help raise money for the organization. Later, the student had the privilege of meeting these kids (who were brought to Israel and had heart surgery performed on them) which was a really touching experience that they’ll never forget.
Shaare Zedek Medical Center
http://www.acsz.org
• Students baked challah weekly for 6 months. In honor of their baking, people made donations to the hospital. Challah was given to donors and also to the ill.
Shavei Israel
http://www.Shavei.org
• This organization works with descendants of the Jewish people around the world (India, China, Southern Russia, the lost children of the Holocaust) helping them feel connected to the Jewish community and in many cases, to make aliyah.
• This student raised money for the Bnei Menashe community of India - believed to have descended from the lost tribe of Menashe. Some 4,000 have formally converted and moved to Israel and 7,000 more remain in India and hope to make aliyah
The Special Children’s Center
http://www.thecenternj.org/
• An organization that helps and supports families who have children with mental delays such as Down Syndrome. They have an after school program, camp, and they take the kids on trips throughout the year.
• Student made a carnival for the children and invited them to the carnival with the rest of her grade.
Sruli4minim
sruli4minim@gmail.com
https://shir-hadash.networkforgood.com/ projects/133101-arba-minim-for-idf-soldiers
• In coordination with the IDF this organization has designed a program which will supply the almost 5,000 active and reserve soldiers, men and women, interested in receiving an arba minim set, with one for Sukoth.
Team Chai Lifeline
https://www.teamlifeline.org/
• Students raised money to run a 5k, 10k, half or full marathon and the money raised goes to a charity to send children with cancer to summer camp.
Thusanani
https://www.thusanani.org.za
• Thusanani supports underprivileged children living in children’s homes in South Africa. It helps young children receive therapy and other medical needs.
• Students raised money for Thusanani by baking Chocolate Espresso Cupcakes with Caramel Buttercream, Parve Vanilla Cupcakes, and Peanut butter Chickpea Blondies (Healthy option). People could buy real or virtual cupcakes. Students baked them and if the customer wanted delivery and they lived near the student then they would deliver.
UJA Federation - Do a Mitzvah, Give a Mitzvah Program
http://www.ujafedny.org
• Students went monthly to an agency of UJA Federation and did an art project with about a dozen kids.
WIZO
http://wizousa.org
• Second largest social network provider in Israel after the Israeli Government. Provides day care centers, youth villages and schools, programs for the elderly and battered women’s shelters located all over Israel.
• Students provided sports equipment/facilities for the kids in one of the youth villages.
