Contents
July 2010 Volume I Issue 1
“Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.” Carl Bard
Columns...Articles...Stuff
Thought Taste Style Relationships Health Inspiration Advice
“To me, old age is always fifteen years older than I am.” Bernard M. Baruch
3
Publisher’s Letter
6
Conversation
16 The Wine Taste
Scotty Scott talks about his wine journey.
18 Appearing Youthful and Cool... Seven style tips for Boomers.
19 Relationships: The Dating Scene
page 20
Have No Fear!
22 Healthy Hearing
Features 12 Sandwich
20 Seven Laws of
Generation
Grandparenting
Stepping up to elder care for generational caregivers.
“It’s like being told you no longer have to eat vegetables...”
Departments
Dr. Borton on what we’re missing from hearing loss.
24 Lifelong Passion
23 Be Inspired
Doo-Wop Harmonies filled the air inside Back Street Kustoms.
“I can’t just sit at home and watch As the World Turns.”
26 About Getting Older
8 Serving Community
10 This and That
To use or not, a few tidbits of information.
The MANE focus and tips for volunteering.
Cover Girl & Guy Contest
28 12 Things
Something to do for active Boomers and beyond.
Win Tickets page 17
page 6
10 things to be thankful for.
27 Embrace Your Health Heart attack entrees with side orders of stroke.
30 Grumpy Old Boomer Advice for a retired teacher.
page 19
page 9
BOOM! magazine is published monthly by River Region Publications, 8637 Harvest Ridge Dr., Montgomery, AL 36116. The phone number for voice and fax is 334. 396.3073. Copyright 2010 by River Region Publications. No part of this publication can be reproduced without written permission from the publisher. Opinions expressed in BOOM! magazine are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the view of the owners, nor do they constitute an endorsement of products and services herein.
The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
July 2010
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publisher’s letter
Has it Been SIXTY YEARS ALREADY? The mission of BOOM! is to serve the folks of the River Region age 50 plus with information and ideas to inspire new experiences, better quality of life and new beginnings.
Publisher/Editor Jim Watson
jim@riverregionboom.com
Associate Editor Kelly Watson
kelly@riverregionboom.com
Research Editor Wendy McCollum
wendy@riverregionboom.com
Opinion Research Jo Newell
jo@riverregionboom.com
Contributing Writers Dr. Bettie Borton
Barbara Graham Rod Hagwood Suzanne F. McNeely Bill Reed Scotty Scott
Alisa Singer
Cover Photography Jamie Martin Photography
dave@davemartinphotography.com
Advertising
Jim Watson, 334.324.3472 jim@riverregionboom.com
Design & Layout Lake House Graphics
Distribution
Chris Johnson, Wendy McCollum, Amy Murray, Richard Ward, Lesa Youngblood
Printing
Publications Press, Montgomery, AL 334.244.0436
Please Recycle This Magazine, Share with a Friend!
I
t was a glorious day, January 31, 1950. My parents were very excited to have their fourth child and after three wonderful girls they finally had a beautiful baby boy, me. Little did they know at the time, my birth made me an exclusive member of the Baby Boomer Generation, born between 1946 and 1964. And if you’re reading this premier issue of BOOM you may be a Boomer, too. They’re here, there and everywhere. Boomers are the largest generation in U.S. history, with 78 million people nationally and more than 100,000 in the River Region communities of Montgomery, Prattville, Wetumpka and Millbrook.
BOOM was created to help local Boomers get the most out of their adventures, challenges and inspirations. We’re interested in your lifestyle and each of you approaches life differently depending on your lifestage. Some of you are Grandparents, Empty Nesters, Parents, Singles and Caregivers. The reality is you may be in many lifestages all at once. You may want to know about nurturing relationships with the grandkids or finding Mr. Right. You may want information on how to use your time to benefit others or pursue that entrepreneurial dream. You may want to finally pick up that guitar or provide the best possible care for your aging parent. Whatever your interests, BOOM wants to share information that will be helpful in your lifestage pursuits. Jim Watson, Publisher
Being a Boomer is about attitude. That’s why I don’t feel like it’s been 60 years since I was born. I want to remain relevant, especially to my grandchildren, so I try to seek what’s “cool” and avoid “fuddy duddy”, which is defined as old fashioned and fussy. Know anyone like that? Most Boomers do not see themselves as “Seniors” or “Getting Older.” Instead they are “Aging” and believe they have many “Good years left.” When we’re 60 we believe we’ll get to 100! Boomers own 65% of the net worth of all U.S. households which means they have the resources to reinvent themselves every 3-5 years through new experiences and a desire to add more memories to their young thinking brains. Let’s see, I’m 60, so does that mean I’m the new 50? Most of us try to think younger than our years, but sometimes a late night or a day with the grandkids will make you feel your real age and the related pains of aging.
When I arrived in Montgomery in 1981, I was greeted by Sim Byrd and Joe Mussafer. During my interview they said Montgomery was a good place to raise a family. That sounded good, so I accepted their job offer to help them build a new wine business; and my late wife, Marty, and I proceeded to raise a family. Since Marty passed away four years ago, I’ve been redefining my future and now want to share some new ideas with my community, including BOOM. Marty was a terrific ambassador for Montgomery and the River Region. She embraced the quality of life found here and shared it with as many people who would listen. She’s still a terrific model for promoting our community and BOOM will share her philosophy. This is our premier issue and I hope you like what we’ve done. Please give BOOM a good look and share your thoughts. Most importantly, help us produce a better magazine by sharing ideas on what information you want included in BOOM. If you want to participate as a writer, salesperson, photographer, etc., let me know. I also want to thank our advertisers for helping us launch this premier issue. They are our customers and we’ll bring passion, experience and expertise to help each one of our advertisers grow their business when they advertise to BOOM readers. We ask one favor; please share BOOM with friends, family and neighbors. Finally, thanks to the River Region community. It has always been a great place to call home.
Jim
jim@riverregionboom.com 334.324.3472 cell/text
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The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
Conversation... BOOM! is a community magazine and if you’re above the age of fifty, BOOM! is all about you and the quality of life we share here in the River Region. We want to have a conversation with our readers, our advertisers and our community at large. Please share your ideas, suggestions and comments. We like to listen, learn and grow. We appreciate your comments.
Want to Help? Let ’s just say you’re part of this generation and you want to participate with BOOM! Magazine in some way. We are looking for folks that want to write , submit some photographs or maybe
help businesses market their services with some of our advertising plans. If you’re curious or interested please drop an email to Jim Watson at jim@RiverRegionBoom.com.
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Readers
Please send ideas, suggestions and comments to Jim Watson, jim@ RiverRegionBoom.com. Call or text to 334.324.3472. Include contact information. We reserve the right to edit letters for clarity and brevity.
Community Organizations Please send press releases and photos to: editor@RiverRegionBoom. com, Deadline: 20th, We want more info not less, please include all contact info for possible followup.
Advertiser Inquiries
Learn about marketing to Boomers and beyond. Call or text Jim Watson, 334.324.3472 or email, jim@RiverRegionBoom.com. mailing address: BOOM!, 8637 Harvest Ridge Drive, Montgomery, Alabama 36116
The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
Do You Advertise...?
The Boomer Market is Too Big to Ignore
Boomers -- those individuals born between 1946 and 1964 -- the largest demographic segment in the United States, numbering 78 million, and leading the nation in spending at roughly $2 trillion annually! People over 50, collectively have $2.5 trillion in annual income and 2 times the discretionary spending power of any other group, are set to inherit between $14 trillion and $20 trillion in the next 20 years, and account for 60 percent of the spending on packaged goods. And then there are cars. The average American household buys 13 cars in its lifetime, but here’s the best part: Seven of those cars are bought after the head of household is over 50. New Empty-Nesters transitioning out of their child-rearing years, nearly 4 in 10 Boomers who have children are now empty-nesters, and report a new level of financial freedom as a consequence—with an additional $315 a month of disposable income.
BOOM! Magazine Delivers the Boomer Market
The Engstrom Institute
Take advantage of this new opportunity, contact Jim Watson, 334.324.3472 or jim@riverregionboom.com
The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
July 2010
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Serving Communit y ELLA
MANE
Montgomery Area Non traditional Equestrians
Horses and Hope
ELLEN
BEN
Therapeutic horseback riding provides important and effective intervention for people with a wide range of disabilities. As riders straddle the horse, an incredible amount of benefit accrues for muscles throughout their body. Instructors and therapists use the rhythmic motion of the horse to reduce spasticity, quicken reflexes, aid in motor planning, and strengthen muscles, joints, and tendons damaged by trauma or illness.
Riders of all ages with limited mobility, as well as those with communicative, emotional or cognitive challenges can experience increased balance and muscle control, wider range of motion, improved language skills and a host of other benefits. Confidence and enhanced self-esteem are also positive by-products of therapeutic riding.
MANE’s 44 acre site is located at 3699 Wallahatchie Road in East Montgomery, and boasts a beautiful new complex including an outdoor riding ring, indoor arena, offices, 14 stall handicapped accessible barn as well as the “Field of Dreams” - a 3 acre state of the art sensory integration trail. MANE serves around 90 individuals weekly and is one of only four centers in Alabama to hold North American Riding for the Handicapped Association (NARHA) Premier Center status. The program seeks to maintain the industry’s highest standards in program, site, and administrative procedures and policies.
Spirit
Vo l u n t e e r s N e e d e d
At MANE our horses are valued partners in a relationship. MANE is highly selective when accepting horses into our program. Many of our horses are donated; however we do purchase animals when and where funds are available. When selecting a horse to participate in our program, we are looking for a horse or pony that is ideal and suitable for Equine Assisted Activities and Therapy. If you are interested in donating to the program, contact the main office at 334-213-0909.
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Volunteers are the heart and soul of the MANE therapeutic riding program. Anyone who has the desire to help, love, and have a wonderful time is welcome. The only other thing we ask is that you are not afraid of horses. Some of our volunteers are disabled, some are retired, some are students, and others are working people looking to make a difference. No previous experience is necessary. Our skilled instructors will teach you everything you need to know. Volunteers are mainly needed Monday through Friday from 8:00 – 5:00, with occasional weekend special events. Whether it’s an hour a week or several hours every day, we rely on your attendance to make classes go smoothly. Volunteers can assist in leading horses during lessons,sidewalking (walking alongside the horse to offer the rider support when needed), grooming horses, tacking up horses, cooling out horses, cleaning tack, horse care, helping with fund-raisers, participating in public relations, assisting with administrative duties, planning of special events, and anything else that needs doing!
If you can’t volunteer, please tell a friend, 334-213-0909 Ann Alan Jemison, Program Director aajemison@gmail.com, for more information visit www.maneweb.org
The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
10 Tips
Serving Commu n i t y
for Volunteering 1. Research the causes or issues important to you. Look for a group that works with issues about which you feel strongly. You might already be giving money to one of these organizations, and that might be a good place to begin your volunteer experience. If you can’t find such an organization, here’s a challenging and intriguing thought: why not start one yourself? You can rally your neighbors to clean up that vacant lot on the corner, patrol the neighborhood, paint an elderly neighbor’s house, take turns keeping an eye on the ailing person down the street, or form a group to advocate for a remedy to that dangerous intersection in your neighborhood. There is no end to the creative avenues for volunteering, just as there is no end to the need for volunteers. 2. Consider the skills you have to offer. If you enjoy outdoor work, have a knack for teaching, or just enjoy interacting with people, you may want to look for volunteer work that would incorporate these aspects of your personality. Many positions require a volunteer who has previous familiarity with certain equipment, such as computers, or who possesses certain skills, such as ability in athletics or communications. For one of these positions you might decide to do something comparable to what you do on the job during your workday, or something that you already enjoy as a hobby. This sort of position allows you to jump right into the work without having to take training to prepare for the assignment.
3. Would you like to learn something new? Perhaps you would like to learn a new skill or gain exposure to a new situation. Consider seeking a volunteer opportunity where you’ll learn something new. For example, volunteering to work on the newsletter for the local animal shelter will improve your writing and editing abilities - skills that may help you in your career. Or, volunteering can simply offer a change from your daily routine. For example, if your full-time job is in an office, you may decide to take on a more active volunteer assignment, such as leading tours at an art museum or building a playground. Many nonprofits seek out people who are willing to learn. Realize beforehand, however, that such work might require a time commitment for training before the actual volunteer assignment begins. 4. Combine your goals. Look for volunteer opportunities that will also help you achieve your other goals for your life. For example, if you want to lose a few extra pounds, pick an active volunteer opportunity, such as cleaning a park or working with kids. Or, The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
if you’ve been meaning to take a cooking class, try volunteering at a food bank that teaches cooking skills.
5. Don’t over-commit your schedule. Make sure the volunteer hours you want to give fit into your hectic life, so that you don’t frustrate your family, exhaust yourself, shortchange the organization you’re trying to help or neglect your job. Do you want a long-term assignment or something temporary? If you are unsure about your availability, or want to see how the work suits you before making an extensive commitment, see whether the organization will start you out on a limited number of hours until you get the feel of things. Better to start out slowly than to commit yourself to a schedule you can’t or don’t want to fulfill. 6. Nonprofits may have questions too. While most nonprofits are eager to find volunteer help, they have to be careful when accepting the services you offer. If you contact an organization with an offer to volunteer your time, you may be asked to come in for an interview, fill out a volunteer application, or describe your qualifications and your background just as you would at an interview for a paying job. It is in the organization’s interest and more beneficial to the people it serves to make certain you have the skills needed, that you are truly committed to doing the work, and that your interests match those of the nonprofit. Furthermore, in volunteer work involving children or other at-risk populations, there are legal ramifications for the organization to consider. 7. Consider volunteering as a family. Think about looking for a volunteer opportunity suitable for parents and children to do together, or for a husband and wife to take on as a team. When a family volunteers to work together at a nonprofit organization, the experience can bring them closer together, teach young children the value of giving their time and effort, introduce everyone in the family to skills and experiences never before encountered, and give the entire family a shared experience as a wonderful family memory.
8. Virtual volunteering? Yes, there is such a thing! If you have computer access and the necessary skills, some organizations now offer the opportunity to do volunteer work over the computer. This might take the form of giving free legal advice, typing a college term paper for a person with a disability, or simply keeping in contact with a shut-in who has e-mail. This sort of volunteering might be well
suited to you if you have limited time, no transportation, or a physical disability that precludes you from getting about freely. Virtual volunteering can also be a way for you to give time if you simply enjoy computers and want to employ your computer skills in your volunteer work.
9. I never thought of that! Many community groups are looking for volunteers, and some may not have occurred to you. Most of us know that hospitals, libraries, and churches use volunteers for a great deal of their work, but here are some volunteer opportunities that may not have crossed your mind: Day care centers, Neighborhood Watch, Public Schools and Colleges, Halfway houses, Community Theaters, Drug Rehabilitation Centers, Fraternal Organizations and Civic Clubs, Retirement Centers and Homes for the Elderly, Meals on Wheels, Church or Community-Sponsored Soup Kitchens or Food Pantries, Museums, Art Galleries, and Monuments, Community Choirs, Bands and Orchestras, Prisons, Neighborhood Parks, Youth Organizations, Sports Teams, and afterschool programs, Shelters for Battered Women and Children, Historical Restorations, Battlefields and National Parks. 10. Give voice to your heart through your giving and volunteering! Bring your heart and your sense of humor to your volunteer service, along with your enthusiastic spirit, which in itself is a priceless gift. What you’ll get back will be immeasurable! These tips for volunteering were made available by the Volunteer & Information Center, Inc, located at 2101 Eastern Boulevard, The Courtyard, Suite 322, Montgomery, AL 36117. If you would like to begin giving back to your community visit their website at volunteer-info.org or email volunteer@clickvic.org and you can call (334) 264-3335
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This & tHAT Friends For Life Contest The Montgomery Humane Society is proud to announce the twelfth annual pet photo contest and fundraiser! With such overwhelming success these past eleven years, we are certain that this year’s contest will be the best ever. With all proceeds raised by the event going to help feed
and care for over 12,000 animals that pass through the shelter’s doors each year, we know that they are the real winners. Of course the pet receiving the most votes will also be a winner, as our cover pet for our 2011 calendar.So get your friends, family, co-workers, even complete strangers to go out and vote for your pet. For more information on how to enter your “Friend for Life” call 409-0622, ext 207 or visit www.montgomeryhumane.com.
In response to the gulf oil spill, Legacy has created the Alabama Gulf Coast Environmen-
tal Recovery Fund for educational and research-based initiatives that will help Alabama’s gulf coast area. Legacy is planning to contribute 10% from every “Protect Our Environment” car tag purchased in the state through the end of 2010 to the Alabama Gulf Coast Environmental Recovery Fund. Those wishing to donate can simply visit their local Probate Judge or License Commissioner’s office and request the environmental tag. The tag is an additional $50, but is tax deductible and can be personalized for free. www.legacyenved.org.
DID YOU KNOW? Some people love the experience of smoking a quality cigar, others hate the idea...and the aroma. But if you’re one of those people who would like to experience cigar smoking we recommend Prattville Cigar Company, ask for Patsy. Patsy is one of the foremost cigar experts in the River Region and she will not steer you wrong, you can even enjoy a smoke in the store lounge. To know more about cigars ask Patsy, 365-9181 or smokin@prattvillecigarco.com. She also owns Zelda Cigar, which will soon offer a cigar lounge with adult beverages.
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Elvis: The Early Years featuring Scot Bruce at ASF
First Show Sold Out! Second Show Added! Tickets for second show ON SALE NOW! Scot Bruce’s critically acclaimed tribute concert to the King of Rock and Roll, Elvis Presley, at the Alabama Shakespeare Festival is sold out for August 16. Due to continued demand ASF has added a second show for Elvis: The Early Years on Tuesday, August 17 at 7:30 p.m. Tickets for the second concert range from $35 to $45 are on on sale now at the ASF box office. Tickets can be purchased by calling 800.841.4273 or by visiting on line at www.asf.net. The Alabama Shakespeare Festival is located at 1 Festival Drive in Montgomery’s beautiful Blount Cultural Park. Scot Bruce’s uncanny resemblance to the King of Rock and Roll as well as his ability to give an authentic and high energy treatment to Elvis’ classic tunes has wowed audiences from America to Japan. CNN raved, “The closest they can come to Elvis in the flesh busting out Shake, Rattle and Roll is Scot Bruce.” The Montgomery Advertiser exclaimed that Scot Bruce is “simply amazing!” Backed by a hot four piece band Scot Bruce will be performing classic Elvis tunes such as Jailhouse Rock, Suspicious Minds, Love Me Tender, Burnin’ Love and much more. All proceeds from this concert will go to benefit the Alabama Shakespeare Festival, a not-for-profit arts organization.
The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
Stepping Up To Elder Care
Sandwich Generation Generational Caregivers
By Suzanne F. McNeely, MSW, RG, CCF, President of Senior Planning Services
The First Step: Assessment The first step when considering caregiving in the home is to conduct your own assessment in a quiet and unobtrusive manner.
1. Ask without being patronizing. You’re likely to notice a general slowdown of activity and faculties - a cue to ask general questions. If you see specific things that worry you, talk them over. Explain your concern. Listen! Propose solutions if needed. Better yet, ask your loved one what he or she thinks the solution might be. 2. Observe carefully. If you notice that clothes are not as clean as they used to be, you might ask, “Mom, can I help with the laundry? I’m usually here on the weekends. How about I throw in a couple of loads for you?”
W
ith the struggles of today’s economy and the life expectancy of the population increasing, there are huge demands surfacing for caregivers of the elderly. A popular term and the primary demographic for senior caregiving is the “Sandwich Generation”, the adult children of seniors. The Sandwich Generation has been tasked with caring for their nuclear families as well as taking responsibility for their aging parents. Most feel stretched thin at best and are often left wondering how they can help alleviate the growing burden of caring for their parents.
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As an alternative to nursing homes or long term care facilities, many families are opting to keep aging loved ones in the home. While the senior in your life might love the idea of staying in the home, as a close family member, caregiver or friend there are many considerations and worries that go along with this decision.
The Sandwich Generation needs some relief from the stress of worrying about how to handle caregiving and what they can do to prepare. The following will allow you to create a working guide to making assessments, care plans and how to consider different options for aging in place.
3. Open the lines of communication. The biggest fear of the aging is losing their independence. If you notice your Dad’s refrigerator is often empty, your instinct might be to tell him you’ll be doing the shopping from now on. He may, reasonably, see that as an intrusion. Instead, talk with him. Try to determine why the fridge is empty. There are dozens of possible reasons. Perhaps he has little appetite. Maybe he is uncomfortable driving to the store because he needs new glasses. 4. Pay attention. Your loved one might tell you about a problem or concern. Although it’s not always the case, some older individuals are comfortable telling their family when they need help. You may
The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
feel you know just how to help if you’re Dad asks, “These eyes aren’t what they used to be. Would you look over my checkbook and bills before I mail them?” Perhaps helping with the bills and scheduling an eye exam is appropriate. Possibly, however, your Dad is not concerned about his vision; maybe he is worried that his mental alertness is deteriorating. Listening sometimes means reading between the lines. 5. Poll others. As you focus on the issues, it is a good idea to speak with other family members and friends about your concerns. They may be a good source of insight, especially if they see your aging loved one regularly. When you have a concern, it may be tempting to rush to intercede. It’s better, however, to avoid taking
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over. Try and come up with a plan together, that way your loved one will feel like they have a say in their care plan. If you come across some issues that just don’t seem like they are safe to handle on your own, consider involving the professional community - a primary care physician, a gerontologist, or home care specialist.
Step 2: Develop a Care Plan
The end goal of a care plan is to age SUCCESSFULLY in the home, meaning there needs to be a plan to address the individual needs of the aging family member. As the loved one’s caregiver, it is important to sit down with them to create a care plan that will contribute to successful aging in place. Whether you are going to enlist a professional caregiver or attempt to implement
the plan yourself, the following are steps you can take and adapt to your loved one’s specific care needs:
1. List the needs for support and additional care that you and others have observed. These will generally fall into the following areas: > Housekeeping - laundry, shopping, and household paperwork. Observe what seems to be slipping around the house and move this to the top of the list.
> Social and safety needs transportation services, companionship, and daily telephone checks. Ask your loved one what makes them the most happy socially. Make sure these things happen each week.
The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
> Nutrition - meal planning, cooking, and meal delivery. Have your loved one make a list of their favorite meals. Involving them in the process will make them more receptive to help.
> Health care - nursing, social work, physical and rehabilitative therapy, and medication monitoring. If there are pre-existing conditions have help come in, or make it as simple as taking a stroll around the neighborhood each day.
3. Make a list of specific help needed in the way of tasks. This will go a long way in taking out the overwhelming feeling from caregiving. Try to plan out a schedule so the tasks are fairly evenly distributed over the week. For instance, laundry on Monday, grocery shopping on Tuesday, house cleaning on Wednesday, etc. 4. Get specific commitments (e.g., Aunt Mary will do the grocery shopping every Saturday). These commitments need to include, as appropriate, a statement of who,
what, when, where, and how. Remember to ask for help to alleviate the entire care burden.
One of the most important decisions associated with developing a care plan is considering whether you and/or family members will be able to handle the responsibility. In some cases, you may want to consider seeking other forms of support; nutrition or preventive health services and caregiver support services. Keep in mind that many outside services are funded in part through the Older Americans Act and administered by the U.S. Administration on Aging.
For more information about local services, contact the Eldercare Locator at 1-800-677-1116 or visit www. B eldercare.gov M
© 2010 American Cancer Society, Inc.
> Personal care - assistance with personal hygiene, medical equipment, dressing, bathing, and exercise. If your mother seems to have trouble with buttons, replace clothes with zippered items. It really can be that simple.
2. Decide and plan for who can devote the necessary time/attention to provide support. To relieve some stress, try and spread out the responsibilities. Typically a relative, friend, spouse, professional caregiver or some combination of all.
Is it time for your annual mammogram? If getting a mammogram isn’t on your priority list, consider this: Research has proven that a regular mammogram is the best way to detect breast cancer when it’s most treatable. So in the unlikely chance there is a problem, you can do something about it. If you’re 40 or older, talk to your doctor about getting a mammogram. And contact us for a free information kit.
cancer.org | 1.800.227.2345
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The Wine Taste
by Scotty Scott
scotty @ tedthewineguy.com
Wine is a Journey
If you’re like many Americans, you have at least dabbled with “getting into” wine. I’d say most of us have succeeded in that venture, given that the old USA ranks third in the world in wine consumption…lagging only a little behind France and Italy. When you take the long history of wine-making in those countries into account, I’d say we’ve done pretty well in catching up! And not only are we getting the drinking done, we’re producing a whole lot of wine, too. The USA is the fourth largest wine producing nation in the world, and there is at least one winery in all 50 states. Oh, how times have changed since settlers first started producing Scuppernong wines near Jacksonville, Florida. My own wine journey began in 2000 when I was hired as a salesman at Caffco International. At the time I had been experimenting with wine and not enjoying the experience. I knew there had to be something better than the Merlot’s I’d been trying. Not to knock Merlot, but the wine-boom of the 90’s had created a monster. Merlot was hot and many brands were born pushing low quality juice on inexperienced people such as me. At this point, I’m pretty much thinking I couldn’t hack it as a wine drinker. But then one day a customer of mine from Kentucky comes down to Montgomery, and with him are a few bottles from his wine collection. The one I particularly remember was a French wine of considerable renown from the Rhone Valley: Beaucastel Chateaunuef du Pape (about $120). I
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have to give that customer (and now good friend) credit for that ah-ha wine moment! That was it for me…hook, line and sinker…I became a certified wine enthusiast.
And then the real fun began! Armed with suggestions from my wine-savvy friend I began scouring the shelves of wine shops, eager to try something new…maybe a new region, maybe a new grape variety, maybe…horror of horrors…a white wine! Some I enjoyed and some I didn’t, but I at least knew I was trying good stuff. Now, nearly 10 years later, my palate has developed and changed and I find that I enjoy wines that are vastly different from the ones I used to drink. Cabernet, Pinot Noir and Malbec are all close friends now. But I do a little flirting on the side with Champagne and Chardonnay. That’s the really cool thing about wine; there’s always something else to try! If you’ve run out of ideas, allow me to make a few suggestions: If you like full bodied wines such as Cabernet, try the Italian wines from Piedmont: Barbera or Barolo. Are you a fan of Chardonnay? Try Semillon or Viognier. Do you like Merlot? You should try a bottle of Malbec from Argentina.
I could go on and on with the suggestions! But I hope that wherever you are in your own personal wine odyssey that you still make the effort to taste new things, still reach for that bottle with a hard to pronounce name. You never know, you might just find your new favorite wine! Until next time, Scotty Scott Wine Guy
Scotty Scott is a local wine consultant and co-owner of Ted “The Wine Guy” & Co. He welcomes your wine questions at scotty @ tedthewineguy.com
The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
MONTGOMERY DOWNTOWN The Montgomery Performing Arts Centre
Frampton Concert August 1st 7:30 PM Ticket Giveaway Winner Announced July 26th Must Be
Talkin’ Bout My Generation
Fifty Plus to Enter Text 324-3472 or email jim@RiverRegionBoom.com
Submit One Sentence Why You Should Win
www.mpaconline.org
The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
July 2010
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a ppearing
youthful
and
cool
Seven st y l e t i p s With another book that gently guides Baby Boomers from dowdy to wow-y, Sherrie Mathieson has made a career out of wardrobe advice for middle-age moda mavens.
In light of Mathiesen’s latest how-to tome, “Steal This Style: Moms and Daughters Swap Wardrobe Secrets,” we asked the style consultant and former costume designer for her best style tips for older women. The basic trick is to combine classic core pieces with current accents and accessories. For more information, visit SherrieMathieson. com. Here are her lucky seven universal truths and tips. For instance, did you know that:
S The older you are the more natural
your look should become. “Women need
to understand that minimalism is not boring and is a very modern twentyfirst-century concept. Too much obvious artifice will age you.”
S Crossing the threshold of boomer-
marketed shops will instantaneously age you. . . . Poof! You’re a senior. “Segregating this age group by concentrating on elastic-waisted, non-wrinkle, and overly embellished clothing that looks either boringly dowdy or flamboyant ends up alienating women who want to look modern, ageless and youthful.”
S Women should spend more on their
“investment” accessories than on total outfits. “Your accessories define your look. An authentic bracelet from Morocco, a superb pair of designer shoes, a gorgeous coral necklace, or a bag that is extremely well made and/or has an exquisite design, can be worn forever and inherited by future generations. These items may be expensive, or sometimes
not, but the cost amortized through the years will prove well worth it.”
S The sportier your image, the less
‘lady-like’ the more vibrant and energetic you’ll look. “(Those) ladies-wholunch, wearing knit suits and matched ladylike outfits look more fragile, and curiously unproductive, than women who adopt modern and stylishly mixed sporty looks.”
S Wear a big (men’s size), masculine
silver or gold watch. It’s a youthful look. “Something as basic as the watch you wear daily tells everything about your personal style, more than any outfit or accessory. Are you ultraconservative? Are you very daintily feminine? Are you about showing affluence? Are you very active and sporty? Are you into quality? Are you hip and modern, or the opposite? Your watch provides the best clue.”
S People can’t perceive quality as much
on a totally black outfit, nor notice its details. “Conventional wisdom says that black is always ‘in’ and practical, surely a safe haven. People might falsely assume that persons dressed in all black are artsy or sophisticated. Or...black can provide an unforgiving harsh contrast next to aging skin and that black is rarely a real standout.”
S Personal style is often confused with
fashion. “Fashion is only a component of the larger context, style. You need to learn to ‘walk’ in terms of style so that you can ‘run’ well with fashion. This knowledge allows you to be confident in what you are doing and present yourself skillfully to the world. Happily, it’s never too late to learn.”
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By Rod Hagwood, Sun Sentinel___ (c) 2009, Sun Sentinel. Distributed by McClatchy-Tribune Information Services.
The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
Baby Boomers And The Dating Scene
T
Relationships
Have No Fear
here are many Baby Boomers who are single as a result of the death of a spouse or a divorce. They may have been alone for years for a number of reasons, but one of the most compelling reasons is that they are afraid to get ‘out there’ and date again. For many, it’s been decades since they’ve last had to dress to impress and feign interest in the most boring subjects. They’ve lost confidence and think they would not be able to pull off a date and furthermore things have changed much since they last dated. Here are seven tips to take to get you back on the dating train before you know it.
Make sure you are ready. For most, this is probably the hardest first step. After losing your partner of so many years, how can you even think about looking for another to possibly replace him/her? It is almost inconceivable, right. If you think this way, you’re probably not ready. On the other hand, you may say: My spouse is not coming back and I have to get on with my life. What we had was truly special, but now it’s over and while I cherish those memories, I would like to make new ones with another special person. This is a great sign that you’re ready to start dating. Don’t go looking for your partner. It’s very easy to compare people you meet with your former partner, don’t do it. This is not a healthy way to start a relationship and, in the end, you’ll be very disappointed as you’ll never
find him/her. Try to approach the person with an open mind and look for characteristics that you like rather than that are alike your former spouse’s. If you’re unable to do so, you might not be ready for the dating scene. Stick with your peers. Young people make everyone around them feel young as well. For this reason, some Baby Boomers may be very attracted to someone much younger than themselves. While there is nothing wrong with this per se, be sure that you’re doing this for the right reasons. This person should be placed under the same scrutiny your older neighbor underwent before you decided not to take him/her up on the lunch offer. If you simply want to feel young, may I suggest a new, exciting hobby like mountain climbing, speed racing or motorcycling?
Go looking for a date in familiar places. If you don’t usually go to bars, do not go to bar to find a date. Chances are you’ll find someone who is nothing like what you expected and the whole experience might but a damper on your enthusiasm for dating. If you go to the library, then look for a date there. You know already that you share at least one similar interest and this can be the subject of the ice breaking conversation. Choose a familiar location for the first date. Going on a first date is stressful enough for anyone, so you don’t want to add to the stress load by being in unfamiliar surroundings. Go to someplace that’s
relaxing and not too noisy. If you and your date live in the same neighborhood, go to a local sidewalk café for brunch or lunch. This way you’ll feel more at home and not half as self-conscious as you’d normally feel.
Stay in the now. Do not try to analyze your date or his/ her behavior before the night’s over. Take time to give him/her a fair chance at winning you over. Listen keenly and ask pertinent questions that show that you understand what’s being said. Don’t get too far ahead of yourself. Enjoy the moments.
Look for a friend not a spouse. Do not go on a date looking for another spouse. Try to find a friend first. The person you date may not end up being your spouse, but could make a very, very good friend for many years to come.
Dating can be as much fun as it is scary. It really depends on your attitude towards it. Keep a positive mindset and make sure you know something about the person before going on a date with him/her. Do not make your first date a blind date. It will prove an added source of stress that you really don’t need. Find your own date and go for it. If it doesn’t work out, at least you will have had a good time and possibly gained a good friend. Distributed by McClatchy-Tribune Information Services.
The Boomer Market is Too Big to Ignore. The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
July 2010
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“It’s like being told you no longer have to eat vegetables, only dessert...and really only the icing.”
O
n the one hand, it was so simple. There was a new baby, Isabelle Eva, and there was nothing to do except love her. That was the one hand. The other hand, belonging to her parents, they held all the cards. I soon learned that I could love my granddaughter fiercely, but I had no say, in anything. She was mine, but not mine. Although this is perfectly natural and should not have shocked me, it did. (OK, I admit that on occasion the word bossy has been used to describe my behavior. Still.) For many parents used to being in charge, deferring to the rules and wishes of our adult children and their partners is humbling. I ended up editing a book on the subject to help me get a handle on my new role. Here are a few guidelines that, so far, have kept me out of hot water.
1. SEAL YOUR LIPS. Even if you’re an expert who has written 13 bestsellers on parenthood, your adult sons and daughters will assume you know nothing about childrearing. Your advice and opinions will not be welcome, unless directly solicited. (Even then, it’s iffy as to whether the new parents really want to hear your answer.) Tread lightly. As Anne Roiphe laments in “Eye of My Heart,” “Ah, my poor tongue is sore from being bitten.” 2. YOU MAY LOVE THY GRANDCHILD AS THINE OWN, BUT NEVER FORGET THAT HE OR SHE IS NOT THINE OWN. I was confused about this in the be-
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The 7 Laws of Gra ginning. I was at the hospital when Isabelle was born and I thought we were all one big happy family. Not. I had to win over her parents. They loved me _ I knew that _ but did they trust me? In the early days I felt as if I were auditioning for the part of grandparent. Did I hold Isabelle properly? Didn’t I know that you never put a newborn down on her stomach? It took me a few blunders to secure their trust _ which must be renewed every so often, like a driver’s license.
3. ABIDE BY THE RULES OF THE NEW PARENTS. The dos and don’ts of childrearing change with every generation. If I had listened to my mother, I would have held my son only while feeding him (every four hours) _ and not one second longer, lest he turn into a “mama’s boy.” These days, with the crush of childrearing information online, most new parents are up to speed _ and beyond _ but we grandparents most definitely are not. Baby slings? The Mutsy Slider Stroller? Who knows what these things are, or how to operate them? The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
baseball game: You’re on the bench until your adult children call you up _ and then you must do as they say if you want to stay in the game. (We’ve already covered this, but I think it’s key.)
5. DON’T BE SURPRISED IF OLD ISSUES GET TRIGGERED WHEN YOUR CHILD HAS A CHILD. Don’t be surprised if old issues get triggered when your child has a child. For many people, feelings of competition with their grandchild’s other grandparents provoke By Barbara Graham traumatic flashbacks to junior high school. This is especially true now, given the proliferation of divorce and 4. ACCEPT YOUR ROLE. stepfamilies. Not only that, some If you’re the mother of the new grandparents are able to lavish the father, you may not have the same kids with expensive gifts, while othaccess to your grandchild as the ers live much closer to the children maternal grandmother, at least in than their counterparts. Still, a the beginning. In most families, little goodwill goes a long way. The new mothers are the primary careheart is a generous muscle capable takers of babies and they tend to of loving many people at once, and lean on their mothers for support. most of us are able to get past the This is not a problem _ unless you initial rush of jealousy to find our think it is. Your grandchild will love special place in the new order. (Yes, you too. Anyhow, all grandparents _ of course we still secretly hope that whether on the maternal or paterour grandchildren will love us more nal side _ are at risk of being shut than those other people. We are, out if they fail to observe any of after all, human.) these commandments. Try to think of yourself as a relief pitcher in a
andparenting
The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
6. GET A LIFE. Sometimes I’ve become overly embroiled in my concern for my son and his family; at other times my desire to be an integral part of their lives has taken precedence over things I needed to do to maintain my own sense of well-being _ and I’ve paid the price. Hence, my mantra: “I have my life, they have theirs.” We are close and connected, yet separate. Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries. 7. LET GO OF ALL EXPECTATIONS When Isabelle Eva was born she was living around the corner from us, but when she was two months old her parents moved her overseas. Not only was I heartbroken, my expectations about my involvement in her life were turned upside down. Yet, once I was able to let go of my agenda _ which took some doing _ I found that I still felt deeply connected to Isabelle and vice-versa. Now my husband and I visit her as often as we can and, in between visits, we Skype and talk on the phone. There are bound to be unpredictable plot twists in every family narrative, but, unless you are raising your grandchildren, your adult children are writing their own story. (See No. 4: Relief pitcher, on the bench.) Who knew that grandparenthood would offer so many new opportunities for personal growth? Ultimately, the good news about becoming a grandparent, and not being in charge anymore, is that nothing is your fault, either. As Roxana Robinson writes in “Eye of My Heart,” “It’s like being told you no longer have to eat vegetables, only dessert, and really only B the icing.” M
Barbara Graham, a Grandparents.com columnist, is the editor of the anthology, “Eye of My Heart: 27 Writers Reveal the Hidden Pleasures and Perils of Being a Grandmother” (Harper, $14.99), which tells “the whole crazy, complicated truth about being a grandmother in today’s world.”(c) 2010, Grandparents.com Distributed by McClatchy-Tribune Information Services.
July 2010
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Healthy Hearing
by Dr. Bettie Borton Au.D. bchampion1@aol.com
NOW HEAR THIS, The Consequences of Untreated Hearing Loss... There’s a saying that I keep posted in the lobby of my audiology practice:
Dr. Bettie Borton Au. D.
“A hearing aid is less conspicuous than your hearing loss”.
If you’ve ever had a family member who struggled with an untreated hearing problem, you’d probably agree. Many people are aware that their hearing is not what it once was, but are reluctant to seek help. Perhaps they don’t want to acknowledge the problem, are embarrassed by what they see as a weakness, or believe that they can “get by” without using a hearing aid. In our youth oriented culture, hearing loss and hearing aids have long been associated with aging process. However, in today’s noisy world it probably comes as no surprise that today, noise exposure is rivaling aging as the number one cause of hearing loss in this country. We’ve all enjoyed too many rock concerts, lawn mowers, shotguns, blow dryers, etc. You name, we listened to it. The result? LOTS of hearing loss. The average person waits seven years from the time they first suspect they have hearing loss until they time they purchase hearing aids. Unfortunately, waiting years, even decades, before getting treatment for decreased hearing, can be a costly decision.
Research has repeatedly demonstrated the considerable negative social, psychological, cognitive and health effects of untreated hearing loss . . . with far-reaching implications that go well beyond hearing alone. In fact, those who have difficulty hearing can experience such distorted and incomplete communication that it seriously impacts their professional and personal lives, at times leading to isolation and withdrawal.
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Studies have linked untreated hearing loss to: irritability, negativism and anger fatigue, tension, stress and depression avoidance or withdrawal from social situations social rejection and loneliness reduced alertness and increased risk to personal safety • impaired memory and ability to learn new tasks • reduced job performance and earning power • diminished psychological and overall health • • • • •
Studies also reveal that postponing the use of hearing aids can actually result in making a bad situation worse. For those with hearing impairment, delaying the use of amplification can actually compromise speech understanding – even later when hearing aids are used!.
Hearing loss is not just an age related ailment. It can strike at any time and any age- remember Rush Limbaugh’s dilemma? Hearing loss even affects infants and children. For the very young, even a mild or moderate hearing loss can cause difficulty learning, developing speech,and building the language based interpersonal skills necessary to succeed in school and life. There are a number of websites available to help educate consumers about hearing loss and promote the importance of prevention and treatment. One such site is www.doctorshearingclinic. com, where basic information about hearing loss, hearing aids, noise protection, and local services and products is available. In the past decade, a tremendous number of advances in diagnosis and treatment of hearing loss, hearing aid technology, and aural rehabilitation have been made. So, if you think you or a loved one suffers from hearing loss, don’t delay another day. Today’s technologies offer a whole new world of better hearing. Visit an audiologist for hearing evaluation and take the first step toward a world of better hearing. If you have questions or comments email to doctorshearingclinic@gmail.com Dr. Bettie B. Borton is a licensed audiologist in Alabama, was the first board certified audiologist in Montgomery, and recently served as National Chair of the American Board of Audiology. She and her husband, Dr. Tom Borton, are the only audiologists with ABA certification in the Montgomery area.
The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
Who says an old dog can’t learn new tricks? L.C. Greene, a 76-year-old retired lieutenant colonel and Montgomery native, has taken classes through AUM’s Senior Guest Program since 2000.
“I do it for fun, and I learn something in the process,” said Greene. “So far, I’ve made one B. The rest have been As.”
Offered through the AUM Records Office, the Senior Guest Program allows seniors 60 and over to take courses at no cost. Senior Guests are not obligated to turn in assignments or take tests. Since 2000, Greene has taken Spanish, Political Science and Information Systems classes at AUM. “I believe I’ve exhausted all of the Spanish classes,” said Greene.
Greene said his favorite class most
The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
recently has been adjunct instructor Patricia Gunn’s Political Science class.
“I told her she made me study more than I wanted to. I read the whole book and did extra research,” said Greene. “She made the class interesting. She didn’t just read from the book. She taught from up here (pointing to his head),” said Greene. Greene said he worked his fanny off, but he aced Gunn’s final exam.
“I have a horror of having Alzheimer’s,” said Greene. “I take classes so that maybe it will help me from getting it. I can’t just sit at home and watch As the World Turns.” As for how Greene feels about getting along with college students in the classroom, “I love it. There’s a great bunch of kids here. We get along fabu-
Be Inspired ! lous,” said Greene. “The workers are fabulous, too. Tom in the Taylor Center computer lab showed me how to set up projects and where to go on the internet to help me out.” Greene said he’s benefited from being in class with typical undergraduate students, and he believes they have benefited from having him in their classes as well.
What’s next for Greene? He’d like to take Math courses. This fall he plans to take Algebra or a basic Math course to refresh his memory from his high school days in hopes of helping his B grandchildren with their homework. M Senior Guest Program Auburn Montgomery welcomes senior adults to enroll in many regular college
courses as guests of the University through our Senior Guest Program. This unique program allows seniors 60 and over to take courses at no cost. Don’t miss this opportunity to pursue learning for its own sake. You benefit from the chance to continue learning; our more traditional students benefit when you share your ideas, experiences, insights and commitment to lifelong learning. Get started today! Tell a friend! For more information on this program, please visit www.aum.edu and enter search term “senior guest program” or contact the Registrar’s Office at 334-244-3796.
July 2010
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Lifelong Passion
“Now, I’m the guy that I always talked about. People say, ‘There goes that old guy with the chopped Merc.’” By Bill Reed (MCT)
DOO-WOP HARMONIES
filled the air inside Back Street Kustoms, and 70 years of automotive history crowded the floor , a mishmash of whitewall tires, beautiful curves, sparkling chrome and pure muscle. Custom car icon Dave Pareso turned down the volume on Lil’ Mo and the Dynaflos and gave a tour of the five vehicles parked in the garage: a 1936 Dodge truck, a 1951 Mercury, a 1957 Studebaker truck, a 1957 Chevy and a 1979 El Camino. Pareso, of Fountain, Colo., has churned out hundreds of pieces of drivable art in his day and won hundreds of awards at car shows. He’s even been recognized among the ranks of the elite customcar builders with his inclusion in the book “Old School Customs: Top Traditional Custom Car Builders,” by gear-head journalist Alan Mayes. The book, which hit shelves last
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summer, features a small group of the top builders around the country and “dozens of chopped, sectioned, shaved, decked, flamed, frenched, nosed, lowered and striped Caddies, Mercs, Buicks, Chevys, Oldsmobiles, shoebox Fords and bubbletops.” Pareso was shocked to be included. “My question was, ‘Dude, why me?’” he said. “Most of these are guys I look up to. You just don’t figure yourself one of them.” Pareso fell in love early, with the Little Deuce Coupe.
His parents divorced when he was 10. Pareso moved near Pittsburgh with his mom, and they rented out the garage behind their house to a local car club. In 1963, when he was 13, the club bought THE Little Deuce Coupe, the ‘32 Ford coupe that had been transformed into a hot rod and ended up
on the cover of The Beach Boys album “Little Deuce Coupe.” Pareso knew exactly what they got. After school, he would sit in that beautiful car, possibly the most coveted car in the country at the time. The spell was cast. The guys in the car club took Pareso to car shows all over the East Coast, he said, where they would show off the Little Deuce Coupe. He had a whole crowd of dads, and he loved what they loved, custom hot rods and drag racing. Nearly a half-century later, Pareso still enjoys cruising around the country to shows with his car buddies. Pareso’s mom got him a job with a car customizer when he was a teen. Pareso did grunt work, shedding blood from all the metal-flake paint jobs that went through the shop. Pareso moved to Colorado Springs in 1970, when he was 20, and became
The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
a welder and fabricator in a machine shop for the city. He always worked on cars on the side, and was a drag racer for many years, flying down the track on the weekends. “I miss that,” he said. In 1991, a bulldozer smashed his arm, and he took disability retirement from the city. That’s when Pareso opened Back Street Kustoms and his hobby became his profession. It’s still custom cars that spark his motor. Pareso is a solid man, with thick silver hair and an easy smile. He loves to talk about cars, listen to them growl, and point out details such as the ‘57 Chevy hood rockets that line the custom grille of his Studebaker shop truck. As he points, the tattoos on his forearms are revealed, a Mercury shooting out flames, the logo of the Lonely Knights Kustoms club, and a pinup girl who he swears is a depiction of his wife. Luckily for him, she’s a car lover, too.
His tour of the vehicles in his shop also tells the story of his passions. There’s the 1936 Dodge truck. Once settled up to its fat fenders in dirt in a Wyoming field, it is now looking good, except that at the time it was collecting dust as Pareso hunted for original parts so he could finish it off. Pareso likes the truck, but he isn’t as turned on by searching for original parts for purist projects as he is about unique creations. Sure, he dreams about finding beautiful old cars like this tucked away in farmhouse sheds. But once he gets his hands on them, he’s more like Dr. Frankenstein putting disparate parts together to create new life than a museum curator bent on keeping every detail as it was. “Dave can do it all,” said customer Larry Losasso, of Monument, Colo. “But I think his forte is paint and custom body work.” Losasso should know. He owns the gorgeous silvery ‘57 Chevy that Pareso has labored over, off and on, for more than three years. The Chevy looks sleek and classic on the outside. But it’s even more The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
impressive under the hood, where its Space Age guts are completely chrome plated. The car has been thoroughly modified, accompanied by custom changes to the body. Losasso has put about $200,000 into this car, and it shows.
The 1979 El Camino tells a very different story. A soldier at Fort Carson took the car to Pareso, in the hopes he could turn raw muscle into a sweet custom. Pareso saw the car as one more sign that car culture isn’t going away, even if the car is 30 years younger than his own, the young guys still love cars and custom jobs. “They’re more into the hot rod and speed side of things,” he said. “But I don’t think the old cars will go away.” His only complaint is that many young guys in the custom-car business think they already know everything. He’s suspicious of guys who didn’t go to the old school, believing the only way to learn is to shut up, listen and bleed a little, until you know the secrets. One of the hardest things to do is to chop a car, cutting and lowering the back to make its lines more sleek, and that is Pareso’s specialty. “I love customs. I love to chop Mercs and stuff like that,” he said. “How could something so ugly be so beautiful when you’re done?” That brings the Back Street Kustoms tour around to his 1951 chopped Merc, once a blazing-orange, flamed, fire-belching beauty that Mayes called “as familiar as most any Mercury in the country.” Chopped Mercurys are big among car fans. But cutting the car, changing its lines, and putting it back together again with custom parts is easy to screw up. Doing it right takes knowhow and a good eye for the right curves. “Dave is one of those guys that has a good eye for what it’s supposed to look like,” Mayes said. “He could chop 100 cars and they’d all look good. It’s
an artistic sense really.” That’s why Mike Arbaney, an engineer in Crested Butte, Colo., came to Pareso when he found a 1950 Mercury that he said had been sitting in the same spot for 30 years. “It looked like a rock,” Arbaney said. “There were lichens growing all over it.”
Pareso helped him restore and modify it. Arbaney figured that since Pareso drives a chopped Merc, he was the man to see. And he wasn’t disappointed. “He chopped it for me and it turned out awesome,” Arbaney said. “It’s looking pretty sweet now.” Arbaney’s Mercury might be the dream job for Back Street Kustoms. Pareso believes in doing affordable custom cars that his customers actually drive. He loves to get out the welding torch and put his own stamp on a project. And he likes to tinker around with the final product, to make a machine he can be proud of.
In fact, Pareso’s Merc had been stripped of its trademark flames and orange paint, and sat naked, awaiting a new outfit. That’s the funny thing about an obsession, the work can never be done. And that drive is what makes Pareso so good at what he does. It’s the answer to Pareso’s question, “why me?”
The ardor he felt for those cars parked behind his house as a boy hasn’t wavered. His car-fueled childhood dreams are still fresh in his mind. “There was a guy who lived down the street, an older guy, who had a chopped Merc. He’d drive by real slow, with his arm out the window. And I just kept thinking, ‘Man, look at that car,’” Pareso said. “Now, I’m the guy that I always talked about. People say, ‘There goes that old guy B with the chopped Merc.’” M Distributed by McClatchy-Tribune Information Services.
July 2010
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Win
If you’re a grandparent born between 1945 and 1965, you’re a Baby Boomer grandparent, and I’ve got news for you, you’re all now officially middle-aged. You can expect (or have already experienced) hair loss for men and hot flashes for women, but there’s good news, too. Recent research finds there’s a host of things that actually get better as you get older and they all help you become better grandparents, too.
4 Rounds of Golf for you and your friends! Must be 50+ and admit it!
E n t e r To d a y ! I n c l u d e y o u r n a m e a n d c o n t a c t i n f o t o :
jim@riverregionboom.com
By Georgia Witkin (MCT)
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10 great things about getting older 1. Clearing Up #1 Your skin is drier so you can worry less at least about the dermatological effects of eating pizza and chocolate when you’re out with the kids. 2. Second Honeymoons If you’re happily married, expect to stay that way. In general, marital happiness increases with every year after the first 25, which makes your home a terrific environment for grandchildren. 3. Fewer Headaches Migraines become less frequent as you get older, and some of you will outgrow them completely, so the noise of birthday parties, “The Wiggles” or “Wii Rock Band” won’t drive you to a dark room. 4. Clearing Up #2 Allergies become milder as you age. In fact, experts say that if you don’t have allergies by now, you’re probably never going to have them. So go play outside with the kids. 5. Mellow Out Have you always been an aggressive, assertive, Type A personality? Don’t be surprised if you start to mellow out now, because you have less adrenaline to fuel the fire. This is why many grandparents have more patience for their grandkids than they had for their children. The secret to why grandparents are so lovable? Chemistry! 6. Toughen Up On the other hand, if you’ve always been a relatively passive personality, you might find yourself growing more assertive now. Recent studies have found that people with your personality-type become more outspoken as they get older, especially when dealing with doctors, nurses and teachers. Could it be because those professionals are mostly younger than you are now? 7. Take a Bite Out of Life Your teeth will become less sensitive because as you age, your nerve-and-blood supplies shrink a little, so you can set a good example for kids when it’s time for a dental visit. 8. Kinder Cuts Expect less scarring when you get cuts. This is also due to shrinkage of nerve-and-blood supplies, so you can show a brave face in front of the grandkids when you’re wounded. 9. New Vision Expect nearsightedness to improve, until, of course, far-sightedness takes over. Try to get better at reading the tiny cartoons in the kids’ bubble gum packages. 10. Sound Minds Finally, if you’ve never suffered from manic depression or psychosis, you can probably feel assured that you never will; not even your grandkids or their parents can drive you crazy now. The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
Embrace Your Health
A diet high in salt (sodium chloride) is a major cause of heart disease and stroke. Despite pleas from government and other health experts over the last quarter-century to reduce salt consumption, Americans are consuming more—not less—salt.
Unsafe levels of sodium chloride, or salt, in chain restaurant meals increase one’s chance of developing hypertension, heart attacks, strokes, and kidney disease according to the Center for Science in the Public Interest. The nonprofit food safety and nutrition watchdog group is exposing chain restaurant meals with dangerously high levels of sodium and is renewing its call on industry and government to lower sodium levels in foods. Ahoy, matey! Red Lobster’s Admiral’s feast, with creamy lobster topped mashed potato, Caesar salad with dressing, just one of the complimentary Cheddar Bay Biscuits, and a lemonade: At 7,106 mg of sodium, it is one of the saltiest restaurant meals in America.
sodium. A lifetime of eating much more than the recommended amounts of sodium presents an increased risk of disease in the long term. But for some, particularly the elderly, consuming 4,000 mg or more of sodium in a single meal can present an immediate risk of heart failure or other serious problems. CSPI researchers examined 17 chains and found that 85 out of 102 meals had more than a day’s worth of sodium,
and some had more than four days’ worth.“Who knows how many Americans have been pushed prematurely into their graves thanks to sodium levels like those found in Olive Garden, Chili’s, and Red Lobster?” asked CSPI executive director Michael F. Jacobson. “These chains are sabotaging the food supply. They should cut back and give consumers the freedom to decide for themselves how much salt they want.”
“More than 70 percent of older Americans have hypertension and are especially vulnerable,” said Dr. Mel Daly, a geriatrician and associate professor of medicine at Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine. “Many elderly eat frequently at these restaurants because of convenience and cost. But the high sodium levels in many of these meals can lead to a spike in blood pressure and even precipitate heart failure in some individuals.” Hypertension experts have estimated that reducing sodium levels in restaurant and packaged foods by half could prevent at least 150,000 premature deaths per year in the United States. For more information visit www.cspinet.org
People with high blood pressure, African Americans, and people middleaged and older—70 percent of the population—should consume no more than 1,500 mg of sodium daily, according to the government’s dietary advice. Others should consume no more than 2,300 mg of sodium per day. Yet it is almost impossible to get restaurant meals with reasonably safe levels of The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
July 2010
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JULY 2010
{12 Things} for active boomers and beyond
TALLASSEE
MONTGOMERY
Tallassee Homecoming
ARMSchair Concert Series
The Alabama Roots Music Society is bring-
Saturday, July 17, bring the grandchildren
Old Alabama Town. Gates open at 6:30 mu-
from Montgomery. The festivities get started
and experience one of Alabama’s unique
ing live, quality music to BOOM! readers,
small towns, Tallassee, only 20 minutes
Sunday, July 15 at the Kiwanis Park at The sic at 7 p.m. Admission is $2, bring your
lawn chairs refreshments, good friends and make a new memory on the cheap. The
Charles Walker and the Dynamites
lassee Tiger, Rufus from Reeltown, T-Roy
of straight-up, deep funk and super soul!
from Troy University and Tuskegee Golden
Charles “Wigg” Walker is a veteran soul
Tiger. Not confirmed: Aubie & Big Al. Bring
man, having recorded many sides in the ‘60s
your cameras. Also, Creek Indian dances
and ‘70s for classic labels. All kinds of music
and tours of the Confederate Armory. Many
lovers will enjoy this concert! Call 240.4500 www.alabamarootsmusic.com
Lagoon Golf Championship
MONTGOMERY
fifty-two works of art from the Norton Mu-
Lagoon Park Golf Championship
presents a cross section of works in many
The 32nd annual City golf championship
media united by the genre of still life, en-
Objects of Wonder
senior golfers to participate. It’s great way
rangement of inanimate objects: flowers,
to compete with other seniors and test your
fruits, game, plants and other materials. Ac-
skills. Entry fee is $180 and includes break-
complished and prominent artists such as
fast & lunch, cart all 3 days, dinner and cock-
Henri Matisse, Georgia O’Keeffe, Andy War-
tail party Friday, unlimited range balls, gifts,
hol, Edward Weston, and Claes Oldenburg,
prizes Friday night. Tell your buddies and
contribute works in a variety of media to
July 2010
course. It’s a 54 hole format and they offer Sadie, Director of Golf operations invites all
life is generally a depiction of a diverse ar-
28 BOOM!
will be held July 16-18 at Lagoon Park Golf
a Senior Division for ages 55 and up. John
Dynasty of China to the early 2000s. A still
Call 240.4333 or visit www.mmfa.org
Vineyards Wine tasting. For more
MONTGOMERY
seum of Art in West Palm Beach, Florida. It
this exhibition. July 3 through October 10.
Night Street Dance” and a Whippoorrwill www.tallasseechamber.com
Objects of Wonder includes approximately
over four centuries, dating from the Ming
more activities like the “Sweet Summer information and complete schedule visit
Objects of Wonder
compassing works from many cultures and
the Mascots and Popsicle Party” at the City
Eagle, Alabama State Hornet, Tally the Tal-
Dynamites. The Dynamites are 10 pieces
visit
day with many activities including a “Meet
Court Room. Mascots confirmed: Faulkner
musical group is Charles Walker and the
or
at 7 am with a Farmer’s Market and go all
plan to compete in this year’s championship. jsadie@montgomeryal.gov or 240.4050
Tallassee Homecoming
The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
MONTGOMERY
MONTGOMERY
MONTGOMERY
Performance on the Green
Peter Frampton Concert
Elvis: The Early Years
Performance on the Green is Friday July 16th
Peter Frampton concert Sunday, August 1 at
Second show added for Elvis: The Early
Cultural Park. Bring your picnic & blanket!
ton remains one of the most celebrated art-
Rock and Roll as well as his ability to give
and Saturday July 17th. Come enjoy a lovely evening of ballet at the beautiful Blount
This event is attended by thousands each year and was named a Top 20 Event by the
Southeast Tourism Society. The Montgomery Ballet will be selling catered picnics for
$30 a person Friday night to benefit the
2010-2011 Season. Call 409.0522 for more information or to reserve your picnic
dinner! Visit www.montgomeryballet.org
MONTGOMERY
Montgomery Film Festival 2 Are there any Boomers and beyond that
dabble in short film? Here’s your chance to feature your work or maybe explore other
7:30 p.m. in The Montgomery Performing
Arts Centre at the Renaissance Hotel. Frampists and guitarists in rock history. Raised in
London, Frampton taught himself to play
guitar while still in single digits. He studied at the Bromley Technical School with classmate David Bowie. At 16, he was lead singer and guitarist for British teen band, the Herd.
At 18, he co-founded one of the first super
groups, seminal rock act Humble Pie. His fifth solo album, the electrifying Frampton Comes Alive!, is one of the top selling live records of all time. Ticket info at
www.mpaconline.org or 1-800.745.3000. {See Page 17 to win tickets}
filmmakers stuff at The Montgomery Film
Fellow Boomers you may want to grab a nap
if you intend on experiencing this happen-
ing. Around 9:30 on Friday nights at Ham and High, ladies and lads start slipping in the bar through an exclusive entrance and
are whisked away to a different era. Liba-
tions such as the Gangster Gimlet and H&H Dark and Stormy are secretly served in the
dark as visitors enjoy Chef’s top secret latenight menu, live music with Jonathan Bloom
and the company of Chef Jon Sanchez himself. Tell the hostess “Jerry sent you” for another secret surprise! No reservation necessary. Ham and High at Hampstead. For more information, 239.9982
The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
classic Elvis tunes such as Jailhouse Rock, Suspicious Minds, Love Me Tender, Burnin’
Love and much more. The Alabama Shakespeare Festival is located at 1 Festival Drive
in Montgomery’s beautiful Blount Cultural Park. For tickets call the ASF box office at 800.841.4273 or visit www.asf.net.
BIRMINGHAM
Flip Burger Boutique
is that whatever we call a burger has to be
you’re an aspiring filmmaker and are look-
MONTGOMERY
piece band Scot Bruce will be performing
only have two rules,” said Chef Blais, “One
horror, documentary, animation, etc.) So, if
Ham and High Speakeasy Night
from America to Japan. Backed by a hot four
grease bomb into an edible work of art. “We
als in a number of genres (comedy, drama,
www.montgomeryfilmfestival.com
Elvis’ classic tunes has wowed audiences
humble hamburger is transformed from a
missions from amateurs and profession-
ture film. For more info call 322.8508 or visit
an authentic and high energy treatment to
recently dining in this restaurant. At Flip, the
Theater in Old Cloverdale. They accept sub-
than welcome to submit a short and/or fea-
Bruce’s uncanny resemblance to the King of
A friend shared her experience with us while
Festival 2, Saturday, July 24th at The Capri
ing to showcase your work, you’re more
Years, Tuesday, August 17 at 7:30 p.m. Scot
ground. It can be another meat or it can be Peter Frampton Live
WETUMPKA BIG RIVER
Wetumpka Depot Players will perform Big River August 5-7, 12-14, 19-21 at 7:30 p.m.
Aug 8 and 15 at 2 p.m. Mark Twain’s timeless
classic sweeps us down the mighty Missis-
sippi as the irrepressible Huck Finn helps his friend Jim, a slave, escape to freedom at the
mouth of the Ohio River. Their adventures
vegetable or it can be seafood. The other rule
is it has to be served on a bun.” With chorizo,
lamb, and crab sharing menu space with Wagyu beef, the restaurant fully lives up to its
slogan “Fine Dining Between Two Buns.” Try flavored milkshakes like Krispy Kreme and
Nutella with burnt marshmallow. The Sum-
mit, Birmingham, AL. Call 205.968.2000 or www.flipburgerboutique.com
MONTGOMERY Blogs
along the way are hilarious, suspenseful and
River Region blogs can be interesting and
winning score from Roger Miller, the king of
http://midtownmontgomeryliving.wordpress.com/
heartwarming ,bringing to life favorite characters from the novel. Propelled by an award
country music, this jaunty journey provides a brilliantly theatrical celebration of pure
Americana. Located at 300 South Main Street in Historic Downtown Wetumpka.
Call 868.1440 or www.wetumpkadepot.com
informative and funny. Below are just a few
that have come to the attention of BOOM! http://lostinmontgomery.wordpress.com/ http://lunchinthegump.blogspot.com/
Please submit any events/pictures to jim@riverregionboom.com July 2010
BOOM!
29
Alive and Kicking by Alisa Singer
Dear Grumpy Aging Boomer,* I’m 55 years old and thinking about retiring soon from my teaching job. After three long decades of bratty, bored kids, unappreciative, complaining parents, miserly salaries and out of touch and indifferent administrators, I’m so ready to be done, but I keep hearing about people starting new, exciting careers after finishing the old ones. The truth is, I have no idea of anything else I’d like to do. I’ve worked long and hard for 30 years and think I’ve earned the right to do absolutely nothing. But these stories about people recreating themselves are making me feel guilty. What do you think – do I really need to put on my to do list: lose ten pounds and reinvent myself? Signed, Pooped
Dear Pooped, Well, since I don’t know you I can’t say for sure if ten pounds is enough, but as for reinventing yourself, yes, that’s exactly what you’re expected to do. You should feel free, of course, to take a very brief intermission following the end of your first career. But after that the audience (I refer, of course, to family, friends and anyone whose opinion you value) will fully anticipate you to re-emerge onstage with an exciting and meaningful second act performance. It doesn’t matter how long and hard you struggled in your “first act”, or how successful you were, because as we all know, if the second act’s a dud the whole play’s a bomb. So unless you are willing to suffer the disdain of all you know, you’d better surrender your fond dreams of a future spent watching Seinfeld reruns, enjoying early bird dinner discounts and dodging your kids’ requests to babysit, and instead convert some frivolous hobby or pastime (i.e., your true passion) into meaningful committed work. You see, just as the feminist movement succeeded in making stay-at-homemothers feel inadequate, the “bonus
30 BOOM!
July 2010
years” that boomers supposedly get (because fifty is the new forty) translate into a whole new set of pressures designed to make the stay-at-home retiree also feel like a failure. Words like “reinvention” and “giving back” are all code for “get off the couch, and start trying to impress people again”. Even a doctor’s note indicating a terminal illness will not be considered an acceptable excuse. (Reference the “Bucket
List” where Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson felt compelled to complete a lengthy to-do list of frightening and uncomfortable adventures even though they had less than a year to live.)
Now let me be clear about a few things, Pooped. As far as “giving back” is concerned, a few hours a week shelving books at your local library or volunteering at the community hospital isn’t going to cut it. In fact, anything short of single-handedly educating the female population of a small country or creating a new global food bank won’t even justify a line item on your new resume. And as for concerns about inadequate pay, no problem, you probably won’t get any at all. Nor should you, considering all the psychic rewards you’ll be receiving (not to mention the medical and dental benefits).
But take heart. You’re about to discover that your career opportunities did not end with your last job. Far from it, because these new challenges will create new and different opportunities to fail which will surpass anything you’ve experienced over the last 30 years. You see this time you will be expected to succeed in a completely new venture without the benefit of education, training or youthful energy. And you will be delighted to learn that your new bosses and co-workers, tikes only slightly younger than your own children, will consider you (and your decades of experience) about as welcome and relevant as smoking in airplanes and instant coffee. But not to worry, just let your true passion for your work carry you through. And if you’re not sure what that might be I can tell you that many people at your time of life take up teaching. Maybe that’s something you can consider. Good luck with that, G.A.B.
*Any resemblance to real persons, living or deceased, is strictly coincidental, by which I mean to say that I made this up. I did this for two reasons: first, nobody would actually seek my advice; second, the thought of sifting through reams of letters about who should stand up at the wedding, is it ok to lock grandma out of the house if she smells like cheap liquor, would not be fun.
About the author Alisa Singer Alisa Singer’s humorous essays have appeared in a variety of print and online newspapers and magazines across the country. She is the author of My Baby Boomer Memory Album, an album to memorialize the first grand child, social security check, chin hair and other milestones of the second half of the boomer’s life. You can learn more about her work by visiting her website: www.AlisaSinger.com or contacting her at ASingerAuthor@gmail.com.
The River Region’s 50+ Lifestage Magazine
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