Rural Leader Magazine November/December 2015

Page 8

4 Levels of Communication That Ensure Understanding By Dr. Alan Zimmerman

Have you ever had someone say, "In response to your comment ... "I understand..."And you were quite sure they didn't? Of course you have. How did you feel at that moment? Most likely, not very good. Something was probably screaming inside you, saying "No, you don't," because you knew they were simply throwing out a cliché.   They didn't really understand you. Unless you realize there are four levels of communication, and until you know how to take people through those four levels, your conversations at work and at home will be littered with misunderstandings. And that is not acceptable -- if you want your team to function well, if you want your customer service to shine, and if you want your relationships to work.   So let's take a quick look at those four levels. (P. S. If you want an in-depth explanation and if you want to learn all the skills that go with each level, I suggest you

attend my "Journey to the Extraordinary" experience, which has a lot more time to deal with the issue than a brief tip could ever do.)   1. Cliché Level. This is the most superficial level of conversation and is limited to unimportant chit-chat. It includes comments such as: "How are you? ... Some weather out there .... See you around ... and ... Take care." This level of communication may feel safe because nothing is ever said that could be offensive. The problem is nothing is ever said that could be useful. If, for example, you are a salesperson talking to prospective customer, and if you stay on this level of communication, you miss an opportunity to understand your prospect's problem and help her solve it. You see this take place at restaurants everywhere. The server will come by after you have begun eating and ask "How is everything?" The typical customer responds with a cliché -- "Everything is fine." And

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the typical customer says everything is fine whether or not it is. If the food isn't "fine" but "not bad enough to send back," he simply decides ... privately ... that he'll never come back to that restaurant again. The server has failed to learn some very important information and the restaurant has lost a customer. But that's not all. The customer loses as well ... because he's had an unsatisfactory experience and may even feel like he wasted his money. So if you're hoping to build better relationships on and off the job, the cliché level won't do it for you. A little deeper communication would be the.   2. Fact Level. On this level, some basic information is shared. For example, if I was talking to you over the phone and asked "How's the weather at your end?" and you replied "Great," you would be giving me a cliché. But if you said "It's 73 degrees," you would be giving me a fact.


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