The Sentinella Málaga Edition No 108
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July 16
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The hokey cokey that's what... Advise the people in, advise the people out, IN OUT, IN OUT shake them all about!! The biggest question of our generation they say, think of your children and your grand children.. Either way the people will vote, but the question is, do we really know what we are voting for. This is not about patriotism - Great Britain, the United Kingdom, flag waving and anthem singing!! This is purely commerce. I find myself confused "but sure" in my choice. On the streets, a mixed view, a cocktail of 3 equal ingredients 1 part in, 1 part out and 1 part undecided. If we ask 10 people from each of the equal parts why they are convinced of their decision, its a sure bet that an impressionable percentage of those people will not have a valid theory on their reasons. It seems that many of.us are voting on instinct. I remember when my parents first bought their home and became property owners, their first step onto the property ladder cost an interest rate of approximately. eighteen percent! How many of us would own our own homes these days if interest rates returned to that astronomical height! The political figures are almost never trusted, the evconomists will always report forecasts of economic turbulence and the media spin doctors will always be spinning.. I personally feel that if you stand on the edge of a cliff 1000 ft high, fear can compel you to jump.
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Deposito Legal MA-226-2007 No part of this publication, including pictures may be copied, used or reproduced without our prior written consent. The Sentinella accepts no responsibility for alterations to events listed, claims made by our advertisers or information provided by our contributors.
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By the time our Costa del sol pioneering magazine hits the palm of your hand this July, these frivolous thoughts will be nothing more than history... Congratulations... If your vote came true ;) Have a cool July voters and non voters alike!
J.J. - The Ed
WhAT’S INSIDE ThIS MONTh? Page 10 Month Of July Page 23 Where Is Waldo? Page 30 Euro Wall Chart Page 33 Recipe Of Month Page 38 Countries Of The World Page 48 Paparazzi Page 49 Dear Louise Page 50 Amazing Animals Page 54 Film Review Page 55 Funny Pics Page 62 Top Tens Page 66 Useless Facts Page 67 FaceBox Page 68 Horoscopes Page 72 Jokes Page 74 Puzzle Pages Page 76 What’s On
Strange News Garden Swallowed By Sinkhole A family's entire back garden has disappeared into a giant sinkhole when a huge hole opened up outside their house. The garden’s walls and gate were also ‘eaten up’ after the gaping gash in the earth suddenly appeared up in Thetford, Norfolk. As a result police and council chiefs shut part of Earls Street, from the junction with Magdalen Street to St Giles Lane. Shell-shocked victim Fiona Rhind was at home with her partner watching television when they suddenly heard “a big rumble” as disaster struck out of the blue. Miss Rhind, who immediately alerted the emergency services, said: “We assumed it had come from a car accident or something, and we came outside and found that the driveway had collapsed. The hole, which measures about 15ft by 10ft and is 8ft deep, also destroyed a fence gate, part of a wall and some paving. The County Council are asessing the garden and water officials are going to see if it was caused by sewers.
Kids Say The Funniest Things, Don't They? There's a reason this expression exists. When it comes to the written word, their adorable mistakes can also be a great source of amusement. One four-year-old's attempt to send a nice message of appreciation backfired when she made an unfortunate spelling mistake.
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Random Jokes :) Patient: Doctor help me please, every time I drink a cup of coffee I get this intense stinging in my eye. Doctor: I suggest you remove the spoon before drinking. -----------------------------------------------------------Husband brings the child home from kindergarten and asks his wife, "He’s been crying the whole way home. Isn’t he sick or something?" "No," replies the wife, "he was just trying to tell you he isn’t our Frankie." Farting in a lift is wrong on so many levels! -----------------------------------------------------------Two police officers crash their car into a tree. After a moment of silence, one of them says, “Wow, that’s got to be the fastest we ever got to the accident site.” -----------------------------------------------------------How can they call it Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is you stand up and say, ‘My name is John and I am an alcoholic’? -----------------------------------------------------------What happens when you ask for help with an erection lasting more than 4 hours? I walked into a chemists and asked to talk to a male pharmacist. The woman I was talking
to said that she was the only pharmacist and as she and her sister owned the store, there were no male employees. She then asked if she could help me. I said that it was something that I would be much more comfortable discussing with a male pharmacist. The lady pharmacist assured me that she was completely professional and whatever it was that I needed to discuss, I could be confident that she would treat me with a high level of professionalism. I reluctantly agreed and began by saying, "This is tough for me to discuss, but I get erections every day that last more than four hours. It causes me a lot of problems and severe embarrassment, and I was wondering what you could give me for it." The pharmacist said, "Just a minute, I'll talk to my sister." When she returned, she said, "We discussed it at length and this is the absolute best we can do”. ... 1/3 ownership in the store, ... A company car, ... A king size bed and ... £3,000 a month in living expenses...
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Funny Pictures :)
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The Month Of July July is the seventh month of the year (between June and August) in the Julian and Gregorian Calendars and one of seven months with the length of 31 days. It was named by the Roman Senate in honor of the Roman general, Julius Caesar, it being the month of his birth. Prior to that, it was called Quintilis It is on average the warmest month in most of the Northern hemisphere (where it is the second month of summer) and the coldest month in much of the Southern hemisphere (where it is the second month of winter). The second half of the year commences in July. In the Southern hemisphere, July is the seasonal equivalent of January in the Northern hemisphere. In the Northern Hemisphere, "Dog days" are considered to begin in early July, when the hot sultry weather of summer usually starts. Spring lambs, born in late winter or early spring, are usually sold before July 1. July’s birth flowers are the Larkspur or the Water Lily. The birthstone for July is the ruby which symbolises contentment. The two zodiac signs associated with the month of July are Cancer and Leo. July 1st - National Postal Worker Day National U.S. Postage Stamp Day National Creative Ice Cream Flavours Day National Gingersnap Day July 4th - Independence Day (USA) July 1st, 1863 - Beginning of the Battle of Gettysburg during the American Civil War. July 6th, 1885 - Louis Pasteur gave the first successful anti-rabies inoculation to a boy who had been bitten by an infected dog. July 10, 1973 - The Bahamas gained their independence after 250 years as a British Crown Colony. July 10, 1991 - Boris Yeltsin took the oath of office, becoming the first popularly elected president in Russia's thousand-year history. July 14, 1789 - The fall of the Bastille
occurred at the beginning of the French Revolution. July 16, 1945 - The experimental Atomic bomb "Fat Boy" was set off at 5:30 a.m. in the desert of New Mexico desert, creating a mushroom cloud rising 41,000 ft. The bomb emitted heat three times the temperature of the interior of the sun and wiped out all plant and animal life within a mile.
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Celebrities’ Real Names They weren't the names they were born with. But we reveal the celebs real names in traditional Sentinella A - Z order! Alan Alda - Alphonso D'Abruzzo Woody Allen - Allen Konigsberg Muhammad Ali - Cassius Marcellus Clay, Jr. Julie Andrews - Julia Elizabeth Wells Fred Astaire - Frederick Austerlitz Chet Atkins - Chester B. Atkins Frankie Avalon - Francis Thomas Avalonne Lauren Bacall - Betty Joan Perske Anne Bancroft - Anna Maria Italiano Brigitte Bardot - Camille Javal Pat Benatar - Patricia Andrejewski Tony Bennett - Anthony Benedetto Jack Benny - Benjamin Kubelsky Tom Berenger - Thomas Michael Moore Billy The Kid - William H. Bonney Robert Blake - Michael Gubitosi Jon Bon Jovi - John Francis Bongiovi Bono (U2) - Paul Hewson Sonny Bono - Salvatore Phillip Bono David Bowie - David Robert Jones Boy George - George Alan O'Dowd
Charles Bronson - Charles Buchinski Albert Brooks - Albert Einstein Mel Brooks - Melvin Kaminsky George Burns - Nathan Birnbaum Ellen Burstyn - Edna Gilhooley Richard Burton - -Richard Jenkins More to come next month!
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Random Jokes Q: Why shouldn't Facebook have paid $1 billion dollars for Instagram? A: They could've downloaded it for free! -----------------------------------------------------------Q: What's the difference between England and a teabag? A: A teabag could stay in the cup for longer. -----------------------------------------------------------Does anyone remember the Swatch, a watch made in Switzerland? Thank god Croatia didn't come up with the idea first. Just imagine if someone were to ask you what
time is it? "Oh pardon me while I look at my crotch." -----------------------------------------------------------I decided to make my password "incorrect" because if I type it in wrong, my computer will remind me, "Your password is incorrect." -----------------------------------------------------------Golfer: "Do you think my game is improving?" Caddy: "Yes, you miss the ball much closer now."
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Childrens Science Exam Answers Children's Answers to Science Exam Questions Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar. Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink. A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists. Q: how is dew formed? A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire. Q: What causes the tides in the oceans? A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight. Q: What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on? A: If you are buying a house, they will insist
you are well endowed. Q: What are steroids? A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs. Q: What happens to your body as you age? A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental. Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty? A: He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery. Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes. A: Premature death. Q: What is artificial insemination? A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow. Q: how can you delay milk turning sour? A: Keep it in the cow.
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Childrens Science Exam Answers Q: how are the main parts of the body categorised? (e.g., abdomen.) A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E, I, O and U. Q: What is the Fibula? A: A small lie. Q: What does "varicose" mean? A: Nearby. Q: What is the most common form of birth control? A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium. Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section" A: The caesarean section is a district in Rome. Q: What is a seizure?
A: A Roman emperor. Q: What is a terminal illness? A: When you are sick at the airport Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature? A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas. Q: What does the word "benign" mean? A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
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Summer Is Here! Funny Summer Quotes “If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do all the rest have to drown too? Steven Wright “Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you” Erma Bombeck “That awkward moment when you write a super long, heartfelt note in someone’s yearbook and they write ‘Have a Great Summer!!’” “Summer is the season when a man thinks he can cook better on an outdoor grill than his wife can on an indoor stove” “A lot of parents pack up their troubles and send them off to summer camp.” Raymond Duncan “Summer bachelors, like summer breezes, are never as cool as they pretend to be” Nora Ephron
“Deep summer is when laziness finds respectability” Sam Keen “A perfect summer day is when the sun is shining, the breeze is blowing, the birds are singing, and the lawn mower is broken.” James Dent “The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco.” Mark Twain “I wonder what the blood alcohol level is of all these mosquitos that keep biting me?”
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Asbestos - Have You Been In Contact?
In this edition, I thought I would look at a number of questions that often arise and that make people worried about the possibility of making a claim. My message is, if in doubt ask! I CANNOT REMEMBER WhERE I WORKED OR ThE COMPANY I WORKED FOR NO LONGER EXISTS. It is not unusual for companies that traded in the 1960’s, for example, to have long since stopped trading. With investigations I can trace insurers who provided cover for these companies and they are obliged to deal with the claims. Even if you are hazy about the exact name of a company or your period of employment with them, I can obtain your work history from HM Revenue & Customs and this provides confirmation of who you worked for all those years ago. I hAVE BEEN DIAGNOSED WITh AN ASBESTOS CONDITION BUT I DID NOT WORK WITh ASBESTOS. I always like to meet my clients and it is surprising how often, when you start talking about a persons work history, what they remember. Often, it turns out that even if a person did not actually work with asbestos, they worked alongside people who did and therefore came into contact with dust. Another possibility, and a particularly sad one in my experience, is a wife who comes into contact with asbestos from her husband’s work clothes. A RELATIVE hAS DIED FROM AN ASBESTOS RELATED CONDITION BEFORE MAKING A CLAIM It is not widely known that claims can be made even though the person affected has died (provided the claim is made within 3 years of death). The claim is made on behalf of the persons estate. DIAGNOSING AN ASBESTOS RELATED CONDITION There are a number of conditions that can be caused by exposure to asbestos, including lung cancer. The main issue is whether the breathing difficulties can be attributed to
asbestos. This is the point we have to prove in all respiratory disease cases, not just asbestos related but also, for example, silicosis – medical evidence is required to prove a link. Claims for breathing problems caused by exposure to asbestos can be complex but the quicker the claim is started the quicker these issues can be dealt with. So, if you are concerned about your particular situation or have any questions please do not hesitate to get in touch. I am happy to talk to you free of charge. I can be contacted on 00 44 1244 340560 at info@woodslaw.co.uk or alternatively you can visit my website at www.woodslaw.co.uk
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World’s Worst Predictions Famously Wrong Predictions Theoretically, television may be feasible, but I consider it an impossibility--a development which we should waste little time dreaming about. Lee de Forest, 1926, inventor of the cathode ray tube I think there is a world market for maybe five computers. Thomas J. Watson, 1943, Chairman of the Board of IBM It doesn't matter what he does, he will never amount to anything. Albert Einstein's teacher to his father, 1895 It will be years - not in my time - before a woman will become Prime Minister. Margaret Thatcher, 1974 This 'telephone' has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us. Western Union internal memo, 1876
We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out. Decca Recording Co. rejecting the Beatles, 1962 Who the hell wants to hear actors talk? h. M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927 640K ought to be enough for anybody. Bill Gates, 1981 Louis Pasteur's theory of germs is ridiculous fiction. Pierre Pachet, Professor of Physiology at Toulouse, 1872 Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons. Popular Mechanics, forecasting the relentless march of science, 1949 We don't need you. You haven't got through college yet. hewlett-Packard's rejection of Steve Jobs, who went on to found Apple Computers
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Where Is Waldo? This month where’s Waldo.... Last month’s answer on page 76
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Linea Directa - Great Idea! ROADSIDE ASSISTANCE - SAFETY FIRST Imagine a service that goes above and beyond, continually evolving and putting people first. Línea Directa have just launched an exclusive trial of their new Safety First service. If you’re a policy holder with Roadside Assistance cover and live in the province of Malaga, you should read the rest of this article. SAFETY FIRST Línea Directa knows that putting their customers safety first is above and beyond everything else. After dark, if you feel unfit to drive the return journey or you feel that driving further would be hazardous to you, your family and other road users, just call Línea Directa’s Roadside Assistance free-phone number on 900 120 123. hOW DOES IT WORK? There are two types of service you can choose either or both: Safety First People Línea Directa will transport via taxi the policy holder and their passengers to the policy holder’s home address or a destination specified by the policy holder at the time of requesting the service. The destination must be within a 25km (15.5 mile) limit from the current location. Only one drop-off destination is allowed, there can’t be a different destination for each passenger. The taxi driver will be booked and paid for by Línea Directa and will request confirmation of policy holder and vehicle details.
Safety First Car In addition to Safety First People, the policy holder can also request that their vehicle be transported to the same destination point. Simply indicate to the Línea Directa customer service operator that you also require Safety First Car. FREE OF ChARGE The service is totally free. It’s available 7 days a week, from midnight to 7am. The service is in English, and uses Línea Directa’s network of English speaking taxi drivers. This trial service runs from 1st May – 31st July 2016. IMPORTANT INFORMATION The policy holder must identify themselves as being insured by Línea Directa. Please ensure you carry your policy number and relevant ID (either passport or NIE number). On calling, the policy holder must indicate their current location and which services are required. The company will accept the transportation of the policy holder and their companions according to the number of seats available in the taxi. Only one taxi is provided for. This courtesy service can be requested up to 4 times per month for expatriate policy holders of all ages and is independent of the insurance product held. We hope the information provided in this article is of interest. If you would like to contact Línea Directa please call 902 123 165More information on Línea Directa online at www.lineadirecta.com
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Salto del Negro and La Molina, it is just 90 metres above sea level and sits amongst lemon groves just above the river. This small village has about 160 inhabitants and is situated between Benamargosa and La Zubia and below Cútar and Comares. In fact folkflore has it that Salto del Negro was named when the Moors refused to convert to Christianity and either jumped or were pushed off the top of Comares, landing in a place thereafter to be known as Salto del Negro or Black Mans Leap! There are other versions of this tale, three of which are listed on a plaque in the village, however the real naming has been lost in time. The old flour mill that has stood as a ruin for many a year on the bank of the river in front of the bridge was bought by the Mayor of Benamargosa a few years ago and has recently been totally renovated. I have asked around but no-one seems to know what it will be once the renovation is finished or who actually owns it now. So watch this space! Or if you know or find out please let me know!
If you want to take a lovely drive from the coast to visit it I suggest turning off the A-7 at Vélez-Málaga and driving inland to Bar El Cruce at Trapiche, turn left and drive through Triana and Benamargosa, when you get to Salto del Negro bridge the village is in front of you. There is now a pedestrian walkway running by the side of the road complete with rustic wooden rails to tempt you to walk safely from Benamargosa to the bridge. Good exercise and remember to take your water bottle and camera.
Salto del Negro belongs to Cútar along with La Zubia, Huerta Palacios, Monte e Los Frailes, Cuesta del Azúcar, Loma León-Peña de Hierro
Property of the Month
AS2535
Salto Del Negro
155,000€
This fabulous, bright and airy town house is situated in Salto De Negro, a small Hamlet close to Benamargosa and comprises 3 beds and 2 bathrooms. It has private parking, a dip pool and tip and tilt double glazed windows throughout. The lounge which has a wood burner stove leads through to the fully fitted kitchen with gas and electric hob. The kitchen leads through to the dining room and straight out to the garden and first terrace with shaded seating and mountain views. Below is a private sun bathing and parking area with gate to the street. The path leads up to a barbeque terrace which in turn leads up to the 2m x 3m dip pool. From here there is access to bed 1 which is 25m2 and comes complete with fitted wardrobes and ensuite shower room. Stairs lead down to the inner patio which is perfect for any weather! also located just off this patio are the utility room, family bathroom and doors back in to the dining room. Up another set of stairs to bed 2 with wooden floor, fitted wardrobe and door to patio with fabulous views and bed 3. Also included is a 4m x 10m allotment situated just off the plot containing many fruit trees including manderin, lemon, orange, plum, cherry and figs. The hot water is solar panel heated and extras include furniture, internet and hot/cold air con in bed 1. This property must been seen to be truly appreciated. This property has energy performance certificate.
WE hAVE CLIENTS BOOKED TO TOUR PROPERTY IN ALL AREAS. IF YOU hAVE PROPERTY TO SELL CALL US NOW ON 952436781, 626038851, 609436537 or email sally@axarquiaproperties.com
Sally harrison Owner / Agent
AS3062 175,000€ Comares
AS3061 299,000€ Benamargosa
AS3049 349,000€ Canillas De Aceituno
3 bed country home with pool and orchard
3 bed villa with pool on 5,480m2 plot
Country villa with distant coast and lake Viñuela and mountain views
AS2981 279,000€ Romo, Comares
AL008 60,000€ Benalmadena
5 bed 2 bath country villa with pool & a 2/3 bed, 1 bath Wood cabin with private dip pool
Leasehold for sale for not ONE but TWO very popular bars in the heart of Arroyo De La Miel
AS2907
129,950€ Triana
2 bed 2 bath townhouse with pool and 4 terraces
www.axarquiaproperties.com and www.spanishpropertyapp.com
Recipe Of The Month Bought To Us By Horizon Restaurant
7 Layer Salad Summer is well and truly upon us now!! So thought I'd give a lovely recipe for either a light lunch or to compliment a family bbq, which ever you choose I'm sure your guests will be impressed!
Method - make the dressing Add all ingredients to a blender and puree until smooth. Taste, and add more salt as needed. Set aside (refrigerate if making ahead).
7 layer salad with a creamy vinaigrette
assemble the salad General note: if your bowl is wide, ring your ingredients against the glass and fill the center with romaine lettuce as you build the layers. This creates a nice balance of greens to veggies when you spoon down into the bowl.
Ingredients for the dressing 1/2 cup Greek yogurt or coconut milk 1/2 cup your favourite mild or medium Salsa 2 tablespoons mayonnaise 2 tablespoons chopped fresh cilantro (coriander) leaves 1 tablespoon olive oil 1 tablespoon apple cider vinegar 1 heaping tablespoon chopped spring onions 1/2 teaspoon chilli powder 1/4 teaspoon salt for the salad 1 to 2 heads romaine lettuce, roughly chopped 1 can black beans, drained and rinsed 1 medium red onion, sliced or chopped, your choice 1/2 cup green olives, sliced 3/4 cup corn kernels (thawed from frozen or fresh - no need to cook) 1 avocado, stone removed, peeled and chopped 1 orange bell pepper, chopped 3 cups cherry tomato halved or quartered (about 2 cups after slicing) 1 tablespoon fresh cilantro, dill, and/or basil, chopped
In a medium glass salad bowl, spread a thin layer of romaine lettuce. Spoon black beans over the lettuce. Add red onions over the black beans, followed by a layer of olives, then corn, avocados, bell peppers, and top with cherry tomatoes. Sprinkle herbs over the cherry tomatoes.If you're not using romaine lettuce to fill the center of the bowl, serve lettuce in a separate bowl tossed lightly with extra virgin olive oil. Serve the creamy salsa vinaigrette dressing on the side.
Enjoy x
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The Spanish Language - We Say... They Say... As if the Spanish language wasn't difficult enough to learn already - Get your head around these!
like doughnuts) We Say…To get out of bed on the wrong side They Say…Levantarse con el pie izquierdo (To get up with the left foot) We Say…Much ado about nothing They Say…Mucho ruido y poco nueces (Much noise and few nuts) We Say…To cost an arm and a leg They Say…Costar un ojo de la cara (To cost an eye of the face)
We Say…Heads or tails They Say…Cara o cruz (Face or cross) We Say…To let the cat out of the bag They Say…Descubrir el pastel (Discover the cake) We Say…To sell like hot cakes They Say…Venderse como rosquillos (To sell
We Say…To be as thin as a rake They Say…Estar como el fideo (To be like a noodle) We Say…That's another kettle of fish They Say…Eso es harina de otro costal (That's flour of another cost) We Say…In a shambles They Say…Patas arriba (Paws above)
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Children... ...are such a blessing! 1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up. 2. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your own children. 3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young. 4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said. 5. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own. 6. We childproofed our homes, but they are still getting in. ADVICE FOR ThE DAY: Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing home one day AND FINALLY: If you have a lot of tension and you get a headaches, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: 'Take two aspirin and keep away from children’!!!
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Random Joke :) Two Crocodiles were sitting at the side of the River Thames. The smaller one turned to the bigger one and said, 'I can't understand how you can be so much bigger than me. We're the same age, we were the same size as kids - I just don't get it.' 'Well,' said the big Croc, 'what have you been eating?' 'Politicians, same as you,' replied the small Croc. 'Hmm. Well, where do you catch them?' 'On the other side of the river near the car park at Westminster' 'Same here. Hmm.....How do you catch them?' asked the big Croc. 'Well, I crawl up under one of their big Lexus, BMW or Mercedes cars and wait for one to unlock the car door. Then I jump out, grab them by the leg, shake the s*** out of them and eat 'em!' 'Ah!' says the big Crocodile, 'I think I see your problem. You're not getting any real nourishment. See, by the time you finish shaking the s*** out of a Politician, there's nothing much left but an a****** with a briefcase.'
net Inter T.V lled Insta
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es l d i r t n Wor u o C he Of T dia bo
, is list and Z d A orl rld wo the wy... e r h d t s in sto un ntrie nt hi o r e u r ou co ec in rest lent r 0 o 3 er po rbu m mb f the s a tu u Ca N e o ha on
Population - 14,805,000 Language - Khmer Located - SE Asia Capital - Phnom Penh Currency - Riel Religion - Buddhism Main Exports - Clothing Literacy Rate - 73% Life Expectancy - 63 years G.D.P. Per Capita - $1,035 Total Area - 181,035 km2 National Sport - Football
Famous for - Cambodia is home to what is commonly billed as the “Eighth Wonder of the World�. The magnificent temples of Angkor Wat date back from the 9th century and pull in millions of tourists each year. Interesting Facts - Estimates as to how many people were killed by the Khmer Rouge regime, range from approximately one to three million; the most commonly cited figure is two million (about one-third of the population). Cambodia is the world's only post-communist country which restored monarchy as the system of government. 35% of Cambodians live under the poverty line. In 2005, oil and natural gas deposits were found beneath Cambodia's territorial waters, and once commercial extraction begins later this year, the oil revenues could profoundly affect Cambodia's economy.
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Tube Talk These announcements were all actually made by crazy London Tube drivers:
4) "We can't move off because some idiot has their hand stuck in the door."
1) "Ladies and gentlemen, we apologise for the delay, but there is a security alert at Victoria station and we are therefore stuck here for the foreseeable future, so let's take our minds off it and pass sometime together. All together now.... 'Ten green bottles, hanging on a wall.....'."
5) "May I remind all passengers that there is strictly no smoking allowed on any part of the Underground. However, if you are smoking a joint, it's only fair that you pass it round the rest of the carriage."
2) "We are now travelling through Baker Street... As you can see, Baker Street is closed. It would have been nice if they had actually told me, so I could tell you earlier, but no, they don't think about things like that". 3) "Beggars are operating on this train. Please do NOT encourage these professional beggars. If you have any spare change, please give it to a registered charity. Failing that, give it to me."
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Student Report Cards These are comments made on students' report cards by teachers in the New York City public school system. All teachers were reprimanded (but boy, these are funny!) 1. Since my last report, your child has reached rock bottom and has started to dig. 2. I would not allow this student to breed. 3. Your child has delusions of adequacy. 4. Your son is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot. 5. Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them. 6. The student has a 'full six-pack' but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together. 7. This child has been working with glue too much 8. When your daughter's IQ reaches 50, she
should sell. 9. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.. 10. If this student were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week. 11. It's impossible to believe the sperm that created this child beat out 1,000,000 others.
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You’re Nicked! These are comments made by 15 Police Officers. The comments were taken off actual police car videos around the country: 1. "You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just went through." 2. "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while." 3. "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document." 4. "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired" 5. "Can you run faster than 1,200 feet per second? Because that's the speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you." 6. "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?" 7. "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?" 8. "Warning! You want a warning? O.K, I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket." 9. "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?" 10. "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat candy floss and hot dogs� 11. "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven." 12. "Just how big were those 'two beers' you say you had?" 13. "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we can."
14. "I'm glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail" AND THE WINNER IS.... 15. "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't.. Sign here."
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Dictionary...
Fantastic!
....for women’s personal ads
Great truths that little children have learned
40-ish ------------------------------------------------49 Adventurous -----------------Slept with everyone Athletic------------------------------------------No tits Average looking---------------------------------Ugly Beautiful--------------------------- Pathological liar Contagious Smile--------------Does a lot of pills Emotionally secure ---------------On medication Feminist---------------------------------------------Fat Free spirit---------------------------------------Junkie Friendship first--Former very *friendly* person Fun-------------------------------------------Annoying New Age---------Body hair in the wrong places Open-minded-----------------------------Desperate Outgoing-----------------Loud and Embarrassing Passionate----------------------------Sloppy drunk Professional-------------------------------------Bitch Voluptuous-----------------------------------Very Fat Large frame------------------------------Hugely Fat Wants Soul mate-----------------------------Stalker
1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptise cats. 2) When your Mum is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair. 3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person. 4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato. 5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food. 6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair. 7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time. 8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk. 9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
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The Difference WOMEN'S ENGLISH
MEN'S ENGLISH
1. Yes - No
1. I am hungry - I am hungry
2. No - Yes
2. I am sleepy - I am sleepy
3. Maybe - No
3. I am tired - I am tired
4. We need - I want 5. I am sorry - You’ll be sorry 6. We need to talk - You’re in trouble
4. Nice dress - Nice cleavage! 5. I love you - let's have sex now 6. I am bored - Do you want to have sex?
7. Sure, go ahead - Yo better not
7. May I have this dance? - I'd like to have sex with you
8. Do what you want - You will pay for this later
8. Can I call you sometime? - I'd like to have sex with you
9. I am not upset - Of course I am upset, you moron!
9. Do you want to go to a movie? - I'd like to have sex with you
10. You're very attentive tonight - Is sex all you ever think about?
10. Can I take you out to dinner? - I'd like to have sex with you
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Who Is Your Slinky? Amazingly simple home remedies 1. If you're choking on an ice cube, simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. presto! the blockage will instantly remove itself. 2. Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold the vegetables while you chop. 3. Avoid arguments with the females about lifting the toilet seat - use the sink. 4. For high blood pressure sufferers - simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure on your veins. remember to use a timer. 5. A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. then you'll be afraid to cough. 7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. if it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape. 8. Remember - everyone seems normal until you get to know them. 9. If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem. DAILY THOUGHT: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES - NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING, BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS
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Pa
zz a r pa
i
m llia i ie W b b Ro
s
Robert Peter "Robbie" Williams Born 13 February 1974 English singer, songwriter and actor. He was a member of the pop group Take That from 1990 to 1995 and again from 2009 to 2012. He has also had commercial success as a solo artist. Williams rose to fame in the band's first run in the early-to-mid-1990s. After many disagreements with the management and group members, Williams left the group in 1995 to launch a hugely successful solo career, which saw his first seven albums each reach number one in the UK. Williams also released seven number-one singles and found similar success across Europe. On 15 July 2010, it was announced he had rejoined Take That. The group's subsequent
Having Erosion Problems? We have a G RE EN SOLU TI ON! We are suppliers of a unique grass called Vetiver (Chrysopogon zizanioides). This grass is used in fighting erosion. The grass has an incredible root system. The plant grows to about 1.5 metres in height and the roots grow to 3-4 metres in depth. This grass needs no special soil, fertiliser or care, only water until they are established. Vetiver is normally planted about 30cm apart. A line 30 linear metres long will require approximately 100 plants depending on the level of erosion. Vetiver builds an
underground wall.
www.vetiverspain.com Sayalonga Tel: David 692 288 657 info@vetiverspain.com
album became the second fastest-selling album in UK chart history and the fastest-selling record of the century at the time. Williams has sold more than 75 million records worldwide, making him one of the best-selling artists of all time. He is the best-selling British solo artist in the United Kingdom and the best selling non-Latino artist in Latin America. Six of his albums are among the top 100 biggest-selling albums in the United Kingdom. Williams has received a record seventeen Brit Awards and has been certified for 18.9 million albums and 5.6 million singles in the UK as a solo artist.To date Williams has announced that he was working on a new album after signing with Sony Music. It is rumoured to be worth ÂŁ150 million.
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Dear Louise - Agony Aunt Dear Louise My girlfriend aged 26 is gorgeous and great in bed but she never cleans the bathroom, puts out the rubbish or tidies up after herself. Her clothes are left on the floor. Her make-up is ground into the carpet and there are mugs and plates all over the place. The other day I came home from four nights away on business and thought that I had been burgled. My once immaculate flat was totally trashed. She had obviously eaten nothing but cereal and takeaways. There was curry sauce on my new velvet sofa, milk puddles on the kitchen floor and greasy pizza boxes on the end of my bed. I was devestated, we had our first row. I called her a slob and she accused me of having OCD. Colin aged 33 Dear Colin My gut feeling is this lady is far too immature for you. Yes, I get it that she’s great in bed and looks good, but she isn’t house-trained. She doesn’t know how to conduct herself and doesn’t give a hoot for your feelings or comfort. I suggest you sit her down and explain that this current arrangement simply isn’t working. You need house rules. She’s not a kid and shouldn’t be behaving like one. Make it clear that you’re not getting heavy or having a go, but you need her to understand that chaos and filth are not an option. If something comes out, then it needs to go back again. Spell out exactly how you’d like things done (so that she knows where she stands) and ask her to meet you halfway. Then, give yourself a mental time limit. If she hasn’t stopped acting like a student in her first term at university, then maybe you will have to rethink this arrangement. She is 26 years of age. She cannot be a burden.
Louise x
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Random Jokes While volunteering in a soup kitchen, I hit it off with a very attractive single man. It was a relief, since my mother and I always laughed because the men to whom I was drawn were inevitably married. So, optimistic about my chances, I asked my new friend what he did for a living. He replied, “I’m a priest.” -------------------------------------------------------------My high school assignment was to ask a veteran about World War II. Since my father had served in the Philippines during the war, I chose him. After a few basic questions, I very gingerly asked, “Did you ever kill anyone?” Dad got quiet. Then, in a soft voice, he said, “Probably. I was the cook.” -------------------------------------------------------------The steaming jungles of Vietnam were not my husband’s first choice of places to spend his 21st birthday. However, the mood was brightened when he received a birthday cake from his sister. It was carefully encased in a Tupperware container and came with this note: “Dick, when you’re finished, can you mail back my container?” -------------------------------------------------------------Just before the final exam in my college finance class, a less-than-stellar student approached me. “Can you tell me what grade I would need to get on the exam to pass the course?” he asked. I gave him the bad news. “The exam is worth 100 points. You would need 113 points to earn a D.” “OK,” he said. “And how many points would I need to get a C?” -------------------------------------------------------------One of my friends is pregnant. And I’m really excited. Not for the baby but because she’s one of my skinniest friends.
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g n i z fe s a i m L A ine uda Mar rrac Ba
Barracudas are snake-like in appearance, with prominent, sharp-edged, fang-like teeth, much like piranhas, all of different sizes, set in sockets of their large jaws. They have large, pointed heads with an underbite in many species. Their gill covers have no spines and are covered with small scales. Their two dorsal fins are widely separated, with the anterior fin having five spines, and the posterior fin having one spine and 9 soft rays. The posterior dorsal fin is similar in size to the anal fin and is situated above it. The lateral line is prominent and extends straight from head to tail. The spinous dorsal fin is placed above the pelvic fins and is normally retracted in a groove. The caudal fin is moderately forked with its posterior edged
double-curved and is set at the end of a stout peduncle. The pectoral fins are placed low on the sides. Its swim bladder is large. In most cases, a barracuda is dark blue, dark green, white, or gray on its upper body, with silvery sides and a chalky-white belly. Coloration varies somewhat between species. For some species, irregular and unorganised black spots or a row of darker cross-bars occur on each side. Their fins may be yellowish or dusky. Barracudas live primarily in oceans, but certain species, such as the great barracuda, live in brackish water.
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The Journey To OlĂŠ! Matrimony The in-laws arrived, right as Feria week in Alhaurin was starting, which meant entertaining people was covered and something we didn't have to worry about. It was the first time we were all meeting face to face, rather than over Skype... maybe that's why I wasn't so nervous? A week spending excessive money you haven't got, on nights out, meals in restaurants, lunch dates, breakfast dates, I felt not only was the wedding costing canceling out my future retirement, but also was my spending habits with the in-laws. Alhaurin feria came and went along with Simons parents and a week off from organising a wedding was now back in full swing. Still chasing people for confirmations, still trying to organise the Mirador etc... etc... All was ok on the bridesmaid front, no boats had been rocked apart from our Scottish bud Marie had taken a fall in her cat rescuing duties and broken her leg. 1 cast and 1 operation later, she trooped into the salon for the girls final dress fittings and will hopefully have a fully functioning leg by August. Ex bridesmaids still linger in the background, and have made contact with my maids, unsure of why they are no longer part of the wedding... Hmmm I wonder! We spent our anniversary sat at the Mirador with many other brides and grooms to be, menu tasting!! Now this wasn't just little bits here and there, this was full meals and all the wines! 4 starters, 4 mains, 6 palette cleansers, 6 desserts... and I forgot to mention the hot and cold cocktail starters.. My world that day is a food and wine blur and I returned home to spend the rest of the evening in bed asleep, awaken some time later the following day, still full! We were finally in the swing of wedding bliss... Everything was organised and ready with a few little bits left to do... Small decor, table plans and our PAPERWORK!! With now only 2 MONTHS until we say "I do" the courts rung, our paperwork was ready for collection.
Traveling to the courts unsure of what the outcome was, had they declined, was there a big fat NO across our years worth of hard work and paperwork? Was Spain going to turn us away with England being on the verge of leaving the EU? Or was there a saint dealing with our papers in the high courts that would pass our marriage request and the wedding was to go ahead? As I sat waiting for the paperwork, I knew either way, come the 20th August, I would be marrying Simon regardless, somehow and somewhere. Reality and nerves were slowly starting to settle into our lives... A few tears whilst planning and hundreds of thoughts running wild in my mind and the "to do" list... “REBECCA�, I was interrupted in wedding thought. My name was called for the court room... Me and Simon looked at each other, and a nervous solicitor lingered in the hall... This was it, were we accepted to Marry??......
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Who Is Taking Bets?... ...by Mark Rickard at Smart Currency Exchange
remaining loyal to 'our' side over a Spanish team.)
Last week on my return to the UK for the A Place in the Sun Live! Exhibition at Olympia I met a very interesting chap at the bar.
I sat next to a chap on my right, who was perpetually on his phone, while watching the match and commenting throughout in English. I took up my usual airport hobby of people watching, and kept an eye on the match.
The journey started so well. I caught the forty minute bus from Marbella to the Airport, the driver had the Real Madrid vs. Man City match blasting the crazy Spanish commentator throughout the bus. Luckily for the passengers on board, it remained nil-nil in the first half - I was worried if Madrid had scored we would have been subject to the driver jumping out his chair at the cry of GOOOOOOOOOOAL! And turning to his public (the passengers) celebrating, while leaving the bus to steer itself! After clearing baggage control in under 5 minutes, I had my boarding pass on my phone and just hand luggage. I sat at the bar for the second half of the match, naturally wanting City to win, despite being a Chelsea supporter. (Us Brits are good like that...
Once the game was over, the chap who sat beside me was off the phone. I asked if he was a City supporter talking to his family in the UK. He laughed and said no, he was from Sheffield, and was the 'price maker' for a BIG bookmakers in Gibraltar. His lengthy phone call made sense now! We talked briefly about his job and mine, and inevitably we met slap bang in the middle Brexit and Currency. He was concerned that his wages and possibly status in Gibraltar would be affected, and I was waxing lyrical on the episodes that sterling had encountered in the last few months.
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Who Is Taking Bets?... Once I had finished my market commentary, he talked with conviction about a recent office wager on Brexit and the effect on sterling. I am not a betting man - I have been working too long in the currency markets - but the office sweepstake was: Staying IN Europe was 90 percent and Sterling was up 7 percent on June 23rd (source being a 'chap at the bar'!) Many of us on the coast will hope he is right. Bookmakers usually are... However, a currency broker's role has always been to protect their clients from the potential downside of economic and political events like the referendum during their transaction. So, we cannot be subject to speculation, 'or the chap at the bar'. This is where it really pays for those making international transfers to talk to a currency expert, to steer you through all the speculation and focus on the
important part - protecting you and your money from the risks of exchange rate fluctuations in uncertain times. Call into the office today in the centre of La Cala de Mijas, call 951 401 921 or email joanne@smartcurrencyexchange.com
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Film iew r Revding Do
el u q e eS h yT
Fin
The new movie begins with Dory (Ellen DeGeneres) pretty much right where we left her: happy, but also extremely forgetful, constantly dealing with her short-term memory loss. Living with Marlin (Albert Brooks) and Nemo (Hayden Rolence), she has certainly found a home for herself, and while she manages to occasionally frustrate those around her, she is constantly surrounded by others who care about her. Still, there is the lingering sense that something is missing, and it's while serving as a chaperone with Nemo's fish school that she realises that it's a connection to her past and a relationship with her parents. After an accident manages to jog her
memory, Dory finds herself determined to make across the ocean to the Marine Life Institute in California, where she extremely vaguely remembers growing up and having a relationship with her mother (Diane Keaton) and father (Eugene Levy). She makes the trip alongside Marlin and Nemo, but the two parties wind up getting separated during their adventure -- leading Dory to team up with a seven-armed octopus named Hank (Ed O'Neil) to help find her parents; and the father-son Clown Fish duo stressing to reunite with their Blue Tang pal. Like some other Pixar titles before it, high expectations take their toll, but ultimately it is a fun bit of summer entertainment. Star Rating ***/*****
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Funny Pictures
www.playamarproperties.com / info@playamarproperties.com
Formerly Dreamtime Properties Inmobiliaria
Office in Playamar, Torremolinos, C/ninive Local 3, next to Prince of Wales
TORREMOLINOS
LOS ALAMOS
Semi detached villa, 2 bed, 2 Bed, 1 bath, lounge, 2 bath, 84m2, covered dining room, kitchen, Porche. Spacious plot, 80m2, 172m2 plot. parking. Roof terrace. Beautiful complex Immaculate thoughout, with pool, 200m2 to stunning garden, beach 215.000€ storeroom 199.950€
PLAYAMAR
Tel: 952 38 40 46
PLAYAMAR
2 bed, 2 bath Type C apartment, reformed 123m2, parking, 2 pools & tennis
4 Bedroom 2 bathroom flat, 140m2, 2 terraces, sunny west facing, 2 pools, gym, tennis.
249.000€
250.000€ neg.
PLAYAMAR 2 bed, 1 bath stunning apartment, large terrace, air con, front patio, MORE PROPERTIES NEEDED FOR parking space 165.000€ WAITING CLIENTS ANYWHERE IN LOS ALAMOS 1st line beach Semi detached 4 bed, 3 bath, lounge, big kitchen, utility room, large 2 TORREMOLINOS. games room, garage & driveway. Large balcony, terraces, 256m built. private pool 520.000€ neg LA CAPELLANIA - BENALMADENA 3 bed, 3 bath villa, stunning location & views, 225m2 built, NEW PROMOTION 6 NEW APARTMENTS & 1 1300m2 plot, needs reform, project - 450.000 euros neg LOCAL COMERCIAL IN BAJONDILLO BENYAMINA-PLAYAMAR - 2 Bed, 1 bath apartment, 60m2, pool, sea view, excellent condition EXCLUSIVE TO PLAYAMAR PROPERTIES. and parking 105.000€ 1 & 2 BEDS & PENThOUSE DUPLEX LOS ALAMOS Independent Villa 3 bed, 2 bath, 100m2, roof terrace, plot 209m2. Pool. 240.000€ PRICES FROM 79.000-170.000 EUROS PLAYMAR II COMPLEX 3 bed, 2 bath 137m2, type D 268.000€ CALL FOR INFO
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Whoops! Regretable Tattoos
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To advertise call 696 116 552 or email sentinella.malaga@gmail.com The Top Ten Most Popular Cats Names in the UK...
en s , T ,2, p 3 o , T ,4 ,5 6 , ,7 ,8 0,9 1
1. Lucy 2. Smokey 3. Bella 4. Charlie 5. Tiger 6. Oreo 7. Daisy 8. Molly 9. Max 10. Midnight
1
The Top Ten Most Popular Dogs Names in the UK... 1. Buddy 2. Max 3. Daisy 4. Bella 5. Lucy 6. Molly 7. Charlie 8. Jack 9. Sadie 10. Rocky
Algarrobo Costa 135,000€
ALGARROBO COSTA Ref: AS2893 Light & bright, well appointed, 7th floor 2 bed 1 bath apartment 3rd line from the beach with optional underground parking space. The2 19m2 lounge has air conditioning and door to the 8m , south facing terrace with sea views, fully fitted kitchen with granite surfaces, breakfast bar, built in washing machine,dishwasher,fridge freezer & microwave and lots of storage, Bed 1 has air/con, bed 2 with fitted wardrobes. There is an underground parking space included in the price. The property is in a prime location walking distance to the sea, shops, bars, restaurants & all other amenities.
TEL: (0034) 696116552
Velez Malaga
77,500€
Velez Malaga
Ref: R2687525 (4219) Build 70m2 Nice apartment in the Centre of Vélez, close to schools, bars and shops. Consists of a spacious living room, a kitchen with access to a patio with a laundry room, two bedrooms and a bathroom with bathtub. Just 7 minutes from the beach with easy access.
EMAIL: sentinella.malaga@gmail.com
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Random Jokes The photographer was positioning my new husband and me for our wedding photos when he asked, “Have you ever modelled?” My cheeks instantly turned red. “No, I haven’t,” I said. “But I always thought …” The photographer interrupted me: “I meant him.” ------------------------------------------------------------Logic: “If you fall off that swing and break
your neck, you can’t go to the store with me.” humour: “When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.” Justice: “One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you. Then you’ll see what it’s like!”
Celebrating 30 Years!
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Health Watch - Sciatica Sciatica is the name given to any sort of pain that is caused by irritation or compression of the sciatic nerve The sciatic nerve is the longest nerve in your body. It runs from the back of your pelvis, through your buttocks, and all the way down both legs, ending at your feet. When something compresses or irritates the sciatic nerve, it can cause a pain that radiates out from your lower back and travels down your leg to your calf. Sciatic pain can range from being mild to very painful. Causes of sciatica A slipped disc is the most common identified cause of sciatica, but in some cases there is no obvious cause. Less common causes include spinal stenosis (narrowing of the nerve passages in the spine), injury, infection or a growth in the spine. When to see your GP Most people find their sciatic pain goes away naturally within a few days or weeks. However, see your GP if: • You experience any other symptoms together with your back and leg pain, such as weight loss or loss of bladder or bowel control • You experience increasingly more pain and discomfort • Your pain is too severe to manage with selfhelp measures.
Treating sciatica Most cases of short-term (known as acute) sciatica will pass without the need for treatment. A combination of things you can do at home, such as taking over-the-counter painkillers, exercise and hot or cold packs can usually relieve the symptoms. For persistent sciatica (known as chronic), you may be advised to try a structured exercise programme under the supervision of a physiotherapist. In very rare cases, surgery may be needed to control the symptoms. Preventing sciatica There are some steps you can take to minimise your risk of a slipped disc or back injury that could lead to sciatica. This includes: • Better posture and lifting techniques at work • Stretching before and after exercise • Simple, regular exercises to improve flexibility
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le e s U
ts ss c a e ss F usel
e ! y ar azing e h T am but
1. The state of Florida is bigger than England! 2. Dolphins sleep with one eye open! 3. In the White House, there are 13,092 knives, forks and spoons! 4. Recycling one glass jar, saves enough energy to watch T.V for 3 hours!
9. Q is the only letter in the alphabet that does not appear in the name of any of the United States! 10. 166,875,000,000 pieces of mail are delivered each year in the US. 11. Bats always turn left when exiting a cave. 12. The praying mantis is the only insect that can turn its head.
5. Owls are one of the only birds who can see the colour blue!
13. Daffy Duck's middle name is "Dumas".
6. Honeybees have a type of hair on their eyes!
14. In Disney's Fantasia, the Sorcerer's name is "Yensid" (Disney backwards.)
7. A jellyfish is 95 percent water!
15. Walt Disney holds the world record for the most Academy Awards won by one person, he has won twenty statuettes, and twelve other plaques and certificates.
8. In Bangladesh, kids as young as 15 can be jailed for cheating on their finals!
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Age Concern Fuengirola June 15th 2016 will be a source of wonderful memories for 80 clients and friends of Age Concern Fuengirola y Mijas. On this day the extended family that is the Charity came together to celebrate the 90th birthday of Queen Elizabeth 11 The venue was the Masonic Lodge in Los Boliches and the room had been colourfully decorated with Union Jacks and bunting. Doors were due to open at 2.30pm but such was the crowd of early party goers and the hot weather that it was decided to let people come in from 2.00pm. There was a great atmosphere with old friends meeting up again and the opportunity to meet new ones. As we sat down to a superb tea provided by Lodge staff it was soon clear that a lot of the guests wanted something a little stronger to drink and in short order the bar was at least three deep with thirsty guests. It wasn´t long before the entertainment began. Everybody was treated to a magnificent performance by one of the Coasts favourite sons Ricky Lavazza. Ricky was joined on stage by the amazing singing talent of Mark Llewelyn. The range of songs and the beautiful voices had some guests
literally in tears. It was fantastic and fully deserved the standing ovation. A raffle was held to raise money for the charity and the quality of the prizes had not gone unnoticed by our guests. We would like to thank everyone who generously donated gifts. Ricky and Mark gave their time and talent free of charge and in keeping with tradition guests happily put cash in a bowl to thank the boys. However, in a magnificent gesture the two singers refused to take the money donating it back to the Charity. This brought about another standing ovation. What a great afternoon. Age Concern Fuengirola y Mijas was established to provide help, advice, support and friendship to all English speaking expats over 50 in our geographical area regardless of nationality. All clients and guests are welcomed as part of an extended family. If you would like to join Age Concern as a Sponsor, Donor or Volunteer or know of someone who may need help please call the Lifeline on 652 537 615 or check out the website ageconcern.org.es and go to the link for Fuengirola y Mijas
EMERGENCY NUMBERS Local Police : 092 - Guardia : 062 - Fire : 080 ...In our own random order! Bus Times Alhaurin de la Torre - 952 410 444 Alhaurin el Grande - 952 491 010 Benalmadena - 952 441 545 Coin - 952 453 587 Fuengirola - 952 471 000 Malaga - 952 327 950 Torremolinos - 952 380 600 Taxis Alhaurin de la Torre 952 410 444 Alhaurin el Grande 952 491 010 Benalmadena 952 441 545 Coin 952 453 587 Fuengirola 952 471 000 Malaga 952 327 950 Torremolinos 952 380 600 Weekly Market days Tuesday - Antequera, Fuengirola Wednesday - Alhaurin de la Torre, Arroyo de la Miel, Rincon de la Victoria, Saydo Hotel Mollina, La Cala de Mijas Thursday - Alhaurin el Grande Freia ground, Pizarra, Torremolinos Recinto Feria Ground. Friday - Arroyo de La Miel, Cartama country Farmers market, Cartama Feria Ground, Mijas Costa, Rincon de la Victoria Saturday - Coin, Fuengirola, La Cala de Mijas, Ojen, Caratracca car boot. Sunday - Benagalbon, Coin La Trocha, Estacion de Cartama, Fuengirola, Malaga next to Football Stadium, Pizarra car boot, Torremolinos by crocodile park.
Shops 10am - 2pm - 5pm - 8:30pm (generally) The municipal market (fruit and veg) and the weekly markets are only open mornings. Cinemas - Showing English Films Coin - La Trocha 951 315 039 Fuengirola Cinesur Miramar 902 221 Intenational Dialing Codes Uk 0044 Gibraltar 00350 USA/Canada 001 Ireland 000353 health Centres Alhaurin de la Torre 952 410 426 Alharin el Grande 952 595 000 Alora 952 498 100 Benalmadena 952 440 305 Cartama 952 424 042 Central health Service 955 018 000 Coin 952 453 336 Fuengirola (Los Boliches) 952 460 036 Fuengirola (west) 952 468 835 health 24 Hr Response 902 505 060 Mijas (La Cala) 952 492 150 Mijas (Las Lagunas) 951 062 247 Torremolinos 952 386 484 Water Supplies Malaga: 952 135 013 Bank hours Usually 8:30am-2pm except Sundays, Bank holidays and Fiestas. Please note, the majority of banks will not accept bills to be paid (ie: electric, phone, rates) after 11am..
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EMERGENCY NUMBERS Ambulance : 061 - Water : 952 540 662 - Electricity : 952 540 662 Tourist Information Coin 952 822 818 Fuengirola 952 467 457 Consulates UK Opposite the main bus station Edif, Eurocom Bloque Sur C/Mauricio Moro 2-2º- Malaga 902 109 256 or 913 342 194 Ireland Avda, de los Boliches, Nº15 Fuengirola 952 475 108 Netherlands/Dutch Avda, Palma de Mallorca, 57 Edif. Castillo San Louis, bajo 29620 Torremolinos 952 380 888 Germany C/Mauricio Moro 2, Malaga 952 363 591 Sweden 952 604 383 France 952 226 590 / 952 214 888 Belgium 952 559 159 Denmark 952 211 797 Luxembourg 952 857 197 Airports Malaga 24-hour information 952 048 484 Arrivals T2/3 952 048 844 Arrivals T1 952 048 845 Departures 952 048 804
Airlines www.easyjet.com www.ryanair.com www.thompsonfly.com www.flymonarch.com www.flybe.com www.bmibaby.com Railway Stations Malaga 952 360 202 Granada 958 271 272 A1 Andalus Service952 537 227 Coastal Service 952 360 202 RENFE Tickets 902 240 202 Town halls Alora 952 496 100 Benalmadena 952 579 800 Campanillos 952 722 168 Coin 952 453 018 La Cala de Mijas 952 493 208 Fuengirola 952 589 300 Malaga 952 135 000 Rincon 952 402 300 Torremolinos 952 379 400 hospitals Carlos haya 951 030 100 Civil hospital 951 030 300 Maternity hospital 951 030 200 Costa del Sol hospital 952 102 112 hospital Clinico University 952 649 400 Telefonica Dial 1002 to report a fault on the line. For general enquiries dial 1004
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) : a h a Jokes h A 7-year-old boy and his 4-year-old brother are upstairs in their bedroom. The 7-year-old is explaining that it is high time that the two of them begin swearing. When his little brother responds enthusiastically, the 7 year old says, "When we go downstairs for breakfast this morning, I'll say HELL and you say ASS. The 4-year-old happily agrees. As the two boys are seating themselves at the breakfast table, their mother walks in and asks her older son what he would like to eat for breakfast. The 7 year old replies, "Ah hell, Mum, I'll just have some Cheerios." WHACK! The surprised mother reacts quickly. The boy runs upstairs, bawling and rubbing his behind. With a sterner voice, the mother then asks the younger son, "And what would YOU like for breakfast?" "I don't know," the 4 year old blubbers, "but you can bet your ass it's not gonna be Cheerios." -----------------------------------------------------------This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years. The only friction in there marriage was the husband's habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke. The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air. Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick. He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out. The years went by and he continued to rip them out! Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts and a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and, gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back
the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts. Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bathroom. The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned she had got him back pretty good. About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his blood stained underpants with a look of horror on his face. She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter. He said, "Honey, you were right. All these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you." "What do you mean?" asked his wife. "Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened. But by the grace of God, some Vaseline, and two fingers, I think I got most of them back in." -----------------------------------------------------------Cats have nine lives. Which makes them ideal for experimentation. Jimmy Carr -----------------------------------------------------------A man walks into a bar, orders the bartender for two beers. He continues this for several nights and the bartender got a bit curious. The bartender walks up to him and asks "Sir, why do you always ask for two drinks?" the man replies, "I used to come here with my best friend but now he's dead. And I'm drinking the second beer on his behalf." A few days later, the man orders only for 1 beer. Curious, the bartender asks him," why only 1 beer now sir?" man replies, "I have given up drinking!" -----------------------------------------------------------Q: If fathers have Father's Day, and mothers have Mother's Day, what do single guys have? A: Palm Sunday.
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Jokes h a ha :) A man asked his wife what she'd like for her birthday. "I'd love to be eight again." she replied. On the morning of her birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl of Coco Pops, and then took her off to the local theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park: * the Death Slide, * the Wall of Fear, * the Screaming Monster Roller Coaster, * every thing there was. Five hours later she staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down. Right away, they journeyed to a McDonald's where her loving husband ordered her : * a Happy Meal * with extra fries * and a refreshing chocolate shake. Then it was off to the movies: * the latest Star Wars epic, * a hot dog, * popcorn, * all the Coke she could drink, * and her favourite lolly, M&M's. What a fabulous adventure! Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed exhausted. He leaned over his precious wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, Well, Dear, what was it like being eight again?" Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed. "I meant my dress size, you f***** tulip!! The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he's gonna get it wrong. -----------------------------------------------------------A new guy in town walks into a bar and reads a sign that hangs over the bar... FREE BEER! FREE BEER FOR THE PERSON WHO CAN PASS THE TEST! So the guy asks the bartender what the test is. Bartender replies "Well, first you have to drink that whole gallon of pepper tequila, the WHOLE thing at once and you can't make a face while doing it. Second, there's a 'gator
out back with a sore tooth... you have to remove it with your bare hands. Third, there's a woman up-stairs who's never had an orgasm. You gotta make things right for her." The guy says, "Well, as much as I would love free beer, I won't do it. You have to be nuts to drink a gallon of pepper tequila and then get crazier from there. Well, as time goes on and the man drinks a few, he asks, "Wherez zat teeqeelah?" He grabs the gallon of tequilla with both hands, and downs it with a big slurp and tears streaming down his face. Next, he staggers out back and soon all the people inside hear the most frightening roaring and thumping, then silence. The man staggers back into the bar, his shirt ripped and big scratches all over his body. "Now" he says "Where's that woman with the sore tooth?" -----------------------------------------------------------A man travels to Spain and goes to Pamplona during the great "running of the Bulls" festival. After his first day there, he goes out late for dinner at a restuarant in the centre of the town. He orders the house special and he is brought a plate, with potatoes, corn, and two large meaty objects. "What's this?" he asks. "Cojones, senor," the waiter replies. "What are cojones?" the man asks. "Cojones," the waiter explains, "are the testicles of the bull who lost at the arena this afternoon." At first the man is disgusted, but being the adventurous type, he decides to try this local delicacy. To his amazement, it is quite delicious. In fact, it is so good that he decides to come back again the next night and order it again. This time, the waiter brings out the plate, but the meaty objects are much smaller. "What's this?" he asks the waiter. "Cojones, senor," the waiter replies. "No, no," the man objects. "I had cojones yesterday and they were much bigger than these." "Senor," the waiter explains, "the bull does not lose every time."
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s e g a P Puzzle Get Quizical
Hey Diddle Riddle
1. What would you add to lead to make pewter? 2. Which of the Wombles shares his name with a South American river? 3. George Stubbs is renowned for paintings of which animal? 4. Fly Agaric is which type of plant? 5. Name the author of Gulliver's Travels? 6. Diamond is the birthstone for which month? 7. Who was Moses' elder sibling? 8. What is the more common name of the plant Hedera? 9. Who won the Formula 1 World Championship in 1992?
1. Two men are facing each other alone in a large room. There is a clock on the wall. One man, who thinks of himself as a prophet, says to the other, "In five minutes you'll be stabbed in the back."The other man is very distraught and stares at the clock. After five minutes he is stabbed in the back. What happened? 2. Countless blades that bend with a touch, exploited by kids who want to make a buck. What am I? 3. A man who lives on the tenth floor takes the elevator down to the first floor every morning and goes to work. In the evening, when he comes back, on a rainy day or if there are other people in the elevator, he goes to his floor directly. Otherwise, he goes to the seventh floor and walks up three flights of stairs to his apartment. Can you explain why?
4. One absentminded ancient philosopher forgot to wind up his only clock in the house. He had no radio, TV, telephone, internet, or 10. Who played Godber in the sitcom any other means for telling time. So he 'Porridge? traveled on foot to his friend's place few miles down the straight desert road. He stayed at 11. Kelp and Wrack are types of what? his friend's house for the night and when he came back home, he knew how to set his 12. The Galapagos islands belong to which clock. How did he know? country? Answers on page 80
Sudokus Easy
Tough
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Puzzle P ages
Crossword Across 1 Small bed on rockers (6) 4 Breakfast container (3,3) 9 Be glad (7) 10 Bright — fast (5) 11 Head as a skeleton (5) 12 French dramatist, Jean d. 1987 (7) 13 Eye protection in the polar regions? (4,7) 18 Landmass formed by two continents (7) 20 Indian prime minister 1947-64 (5) 22 Feed in a pasture (5) 23 Floating mass (of lettuce?) (7) 24 Free from liability (6) 25 Spin (6)
Down 1 Cherry red (6) 2 Old province of the Loire valley, an English possession 1154-1204 (5) 3 Stricken (4,3) 5 Gadget (5) 6 Whim (7) 7 Princess beloved by Cupid (6) 8 Delusion about one’s own power (11) 14 Tell (7) 15 (Use of) heavy weapons systems (7) 16 Eater of no animal products (6) 17 (Make an) embarrassing mistake (6) 19 Without the bounds of moderation (5) 21 Dog-like carrion eater (5)
What’s on in your area this month? Every Wednesday The Malaga Picasso Museum is offereing free guided tours in English which is included in the price of admission. Starts 11.30am. Every Friday Bootsale at Los Arcos on the road Cartama - Coin. Come and sell your unwanted things + brick a brac. Market Days Monday - Marbella, Torrox, Alora & Riviera del Sol Tuesday - Fuengirola, Marbella, Benihavis, Algeciras & Tarifa Wednesday - Arroyo (flea market in paloma park) La Cala & Alhaurin de la Torre Thursday - Torremolinos, Alhaurin el Grande, & San Pedro Friday - Arroyo, Tivoli & Paloma Park, Mijas Costa & Marbella Saturday - Puerto Banus, Mijas Costa, Coin, Istan, Estepona,Ojen Pueblo, & Fuengirola Flea Market Sunday - Fuengirola(nr Mosque), Torremolinos Flea Market, La Trocha Boot Fair, Coin, Estepona, San Roque & Sotogrande, Mijas Hipodromo Boot Fair, Calypso Calahona. Shelagh 'J' Line dancing. Every Monday morning 10.30am till 12.30pm at Los Arcos on the Coin to Cartama road. Step by step for beginners / intermediate also every Friday morning 10.30am till 12.30pm at La Masia Villafranco. Step by step for beginners intermediate. Good exercise with a warm and
friendly atmosphere. Call: 952 963 122 or mobile 685 649 944 Email: shelaghjcollins@hotmail.com Shaggys Bar at Fuengirola Port Open Wednesday to Saturday from 8pm till late. Sunday afternoon open from 1pm till late with live music and later Karaoke. Every Friday and Saturday from 10pm live music and Wednesday and Thursday Karaoke. The Shaggy’s Team like to entertain you, so what are you waiting for! Call: 676 194 537 The monthly Quiz Night at The Olive Tree, Coin, Calle Maria Zambrano, will take place on 8th June starting at 8 o'clock. All proceeds will go to the RAF Association to help in their vital welfare work assisting ex members of the RAF and their families. Come and join in with the fun; your support is very much appreciated. To reserve a table call: 952 452 554 Patchwork and Quilting Exhibition June 21st - July 7th. Centre Cultural y Deportivo, Bulevar, La Cala, Cala de Mijas. Free entry Raquetas de Mijas has a summer club running in July and August from 8am until 2pm (or 5pm). Cost is €15 per day (or €20 until 5pm); €70 per week (or €85) and €220 (or €290) for the month. Lunch menu is an additional €6. Activities include padel, tennis, karate and crafts, zipline, pedaloes, trampolining.... Open to ages 4-15 years old. Location: Urb La Torre Cala Hills, C/Tomillo de la Torre, Mijas Costa 29650 Tel: (0034) 951 001 111 Email: info@raquetasdemijas.com
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AIR CONDITIONING
CAR HIRE
wFor Air Conditioning call Mark at Esola, 616 119 007, Torre del Mar wAir conditioning repairs new installations. Coin meters to help with consumption costs. Solar repairs. Swimming pool heating. Nerja to Sotogrande and inland. Airflow 952 443 222 airflowspain@live.com
wLow Cost Car hire - Car hire at competitive prices, free delivery & collection, airport collection & return. Weekly & monthly rates. Long term from just 50â‚Ź per week. No credit card req. Call: 622 122 000 www.countrycarhire.info
AIR CON & DEHUMIDIFICATION wEuropean Coolers Ltd - Keep cool and comfort-
able this summer. We are a British based air treatment online retailer offering only the best products and service to our customers. All our prices are inclusive of VAT and full warranty, NO hidden extras, buy from us with total confidence. Visit us at www.europeancoolers.co.uk e-mail europeancoolers@gmail.com Tel: 01606 44888
BARS & RESTARURANTS wFestival Cafe Cafeteria, Internet, Gelateria, English Breakfasts, hamburgers, pizza and pasta. La Trocha, Coin. Call: 951 315 206
BEDS wThe Bed Warehouse New larger showroom, top
quality British Beds and mattresses at unbeatable prices. Call: 600 633 986 / 634 187 700 www.bedwarehousespain.com bedwarehousespain@hotmail.com
CARS BUY & SELL wCars Wanted - Cash Waiting, any age/registration/condition/embargoed or financed. Motorbikes/cars/caravans etc.. Anything considered. We collect. All areas. Call: 687 049 592 / 622 156 022
COUNSELLING wKestrel Counselling. Professional, confidential, qualified counselling service. Face 2 Face, skype or online. Experienced with all age groups including children. www.kestrelcounselling.com Email: kestrelcounselling@hushmail.com Tel: 636 588 697
DENTISTS wAlhaurin Dental Centre World class dental care, licensed, insured and provides high quality, word class dental care to the whole family since 2001. Call: 654 996 026
DRIVING SCHOOL
BEERS & WINES
wEnglish Driving School, over 25 years experience. Officially recognised driving school. Call: 651 771 879
wLos Zarcillos hos & Grapes A Shop with Spanish Wines and international Craft Beers. Gift Baskets etc. Are you a bar owner? Ask for our price list! Located opposite the Fuengirola Town Hall. www.LosZarcillos.com 626 771 735
ELECTRICIANS
BOAT TRIPS wBoat Trips - Caleta Cruise Club (Torre del Mar) Tel: 650 193 777 www.AbsoluteAxarquia.com/attractions/ccc.htm
wDomoelect All electrical Works, Bulletins, Projects, Complete rewires, Fault finding, Emergency 24/7 callout. Tel: 687 660 366 www.domoelect.com wDomestic & Commercial for all your electrical installation. All works carried out by a qualified timeserved craftsman. Fully insured and all work guaranteed. Call David, 952 567 765 / 608 864 683
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A-Z Directory ENGINEERING/SYSTEMS
HOLIDAY APARTMENTS
wKiano All types of machining, engineering and development. Call: 638 735 747
wPalm Beach Club Holiday apartments & Studios. Special long let prices. Call: 952 370339
ESTATE AGENTS/REAL ESTATE
HOME SERVICES
wAxarquia Properties S.L Call: 626 038 851 or 952
436 781 www.axarquiaproperties.com Email: sallyharrison@axarquiaproperties.com
wPlayamar Properties Call:952 384 046
www.playamarproperties.com info@playamarproperties.com wAlexander Lord Properties: 951 48 00 24 or 634 331 215 www.alexanderlordproperties.com Email:info@alexanderlordproperties.com Coastal and Inland properties. Promoting your property in the UK and across Europe.
FURNITURE wFurniture Land Quality Secondhand Furniture with bargain low prices. Alhaurin el Grande Tel: 633 666 098 www.furniture-land.webs.com
GARDEN IRRIGATION wGarden irrigation: automatic irrigation, free and fast quotation. Fixed price. Six guarantees. Tel: 952 931 558 Email: fpingenieros@gmail.com
wRich Shine homecare Total care for your home! Home & Window cleaning, Gardens a & pools. Environmental friendly products. For a professional & reliable service contact us! 634 436 532 Email: richshinespain@gmail.com website richshinehomecare.com wGeneral cleaning, gardening and petcare services in the Alhaurin / Coin area from 8€ per hour. Call Robert on 608 041 447.
HOTELS whotel Tamisa Golf The jewel of Mijas Call: 952 858 988 reservas@hoteltamisagolf.com
INSURANCE wService-Center Calypso Your perfect place for all types of Insurance. We collaborate with the biggest companies to provide you with the best quote. Call 952 939 068
INTERNET TV
GARDENS
wIPTV with up to date TV service. set top boxes with 14 day catch up. Call: 951 242 435
wLa Concepcion Historical and Botanical Gardens Call: 952 252 148
KENNELS
GLASS CURTAINS wNeoGlass Glass Curtains and Roofs. Call for quotation or visit our showroom Calle Rio Benamargosa No. 7, Opp. the BP Gargae on Camino de Coin, Mijas Costa. Call: 951 775 214 www.neoglass.es wDiamond Windows & Doors High quality workmanship, value for money, the best team in the business – ask our customers. www.diamondwindowsanddoors.net. Call 952 665 022 All areas covered.
w Cat and Dog World kennels and cattery, fully licensed, first class facilities, collection service, Low cost neutering clinic. Tel: 952112978 / 630196435 www.cat-and-dog-world.com
LAUNDERETTES wAnna’s Laundry - Service Wash, Dried & Folded, Ironing Service, Dry Cleaning Service. Down the ramp in Plaza Ibensa Benalmadena Mon - Fri 09.30 -16.30 no siesta. Tel: 952 560 914 www.annaslaundry.com
LAWYERS
HOBBIES wYunīku Bonsai is for beginners, hobbyists or experienced collectors. Authentic bonsai trees, pots, tools and accessories. Help, advice and workshops. Tel: 615960305 www.bonsai-spain-espana.com
wDe Cotta Law Spanish and English Lawyers, spe-
cialising in Business Law, Debt Recovery, Company Start-Ups and more. Multilingual. Mijas Costa/Calahonda. Tel: 952 931 781 mijas@decottalaw.net
To advertise in the Sentiyella Pages Email: sentinella.malaga@gmail.com Or Call: 696 116 552
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To advertise call 696 116 552 or email sentinella.malaga@gmail.com
A-Z Directory LOCKSMITH wEmergency/Appointment. Doors opened without destruction, Locks changed, Patio Doors & Windows Secured, 24 hour service Call Paul 657 466 803
MOBILE HOME PARKS wMobile home Parks Interested in living on a residential park or a family holiday park? We deal with new homes and resale homes. Please call us 0034 682 192 576
PAPERSHOPS wPapeleria Cristina Large selection of cards, newspapers, magazines and stationary. Offex postal service, PO boxes, internet & mobile top ups. Tel/Fax: 952 594 108 Email: papcristina@hotmail.com
POOL TABLES/VENDING MACH. wProfit share - No outlay required: Pool Tables, MiniVending, Boxing Machines, Football Tables, Juke Boxes also New/Secondhand Domestic Pool Tables & Accessories. 629530233 www.superpoolspain.com
PROPERTY RENTALS wOwners - Thinking of renting out your property? Clients - Looking for long term, lengthy or holiday rentals? Contact www.solfinders.com or phone 952 930 459 wLong term / Short term rentals - Studio apartment Benalmadena - Gamanol area. Long and short term holiday lets, 5 min walk from beach, beautiful communal gardens and pools. Suit 2 adults & 2 children, English TV. Tel: 0034 658 583 817 or 00353 858 735 394
PARTIES
REMOVALS
whave a Paint Party! Follow along on canvas. Have
wRoy Trevor Removals The professional worldwide movers, weekly services between UK, Spain & Portugal. Call: 951 311 118 Mijas Costa
PC/LAPTOP/MOBILE REPAIRS
wFetajo Rent A Car Your quality local company in the
PLANT HIRE
ROOFING & GUTTERING
a drink, socialise and have fun. At your home or your chosen venue. All Art Materials provided. Also Childrens Parties , Corporate Events, Team building, Private Art Lessons Whatsapp Suzy 634324690
RENT A CAR
Costa del Sol -Free delivery & collection at Málaga wPC & laptop repairs. iPads, tablets, broken screens,Airport without any queue or Courtesy Minibus and phones, motherboards, water damage. Starting fromwe don´t charge for fuel -Bookings on: 952 939 738 or 952 934 412 - www.fetajorentacar.com 35€. Call 952 591 071. Electronbox & PC Doctor
wWebb & Sons Plant hire Suppliers of river stone, sand, gravel, turf & top soil. Call: 649 526 922 / 647 880 816 based near Alhaurin el Grande
PLUMBERS wSimply Plumbing: For all your plumbing needs, from leaking tap to complete reform, from decalcifying to safe drinking water. Telephone 634 257 718 or for English afternoons only 665 507 429
wAll Types of Roofing & Guttering work undertaken in all aspects of the job. For a no obligation quote please call: 607 441 959 / 654 184 424
SATELLITE SYSTEMS wTechTechno-Vision, Satellite & IPTV Systems. We also offer high speed 4g Internet. Mob: 657 066 782 & 649 915 289. Web: www.techno-vision.es Email: info@techno-vision.es
POOL SHOPS wSplash Swimming Pool S.L The biggest pool shop in Mijas. Pool maintenance, pool analysis, special offers always available. Call: 952 591 053 info@splashpoolshop.com Get Quizical Answers 1. Tin, 2. Orinoco, 3. Horse, 4. Fungus, 5. Jonathan Swift, 6. April, 7. Aaron, 8. Ivy, 9. Nigel Mansell, 10. Richard Beckinsale, 11. Seaweed, 12. Ecuador Riddle Diddle Answers 1. After five minutes the man turned round to make sure no one was there and his friend, the prophet, stabbed him in the back, 2. Grass, 3. The man is of short stature. He can't reach the upper elevator buttons, but he can ask people to push them for him. He can also push them with his umbrella, 4. Clocks can measure time even when they do not show the right time. You just have to wind the clock up and...(We have to suppose that the journey to the friend and back lasts exactly the same time and the friend has a clockshowing the correct time. Where’s Waldo Answer June
This Month’s Crossword Answers
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A-Z Directory SECURITY
WATER WELLS
wPERFECT Alarm S.L. High quality security systems, video surveillance, alarm systems, perimetric protection, home automation. Worldwide surveillance of your property. We speak English and German. Call Mr. Martin: 608 517 661
w Water Well Pump Services and Supply. Agricultural Engineer Sandra Franzetti. Based on scientific knowledge. Special 3" submersible pump in stock. Free and fast quotation. Tel:952931558 Email: fpingenieros@gmail.com
SIGNS w Sign D Sign, Specailising in, Shop signs, Window signs, Vehicle signs, A boards and large format printing, Tel 603 464 582 info@signdsign1.com www.signdsign1.com.
SWIMMING POOLS wLEAK-TEC specialist pool leak detection company. Please visit our website www.leak-tec.com for more information, or call Calvin on 666 659 876 (part of Axarquia Pools)
TELEVISION REPAIRS wTelevision Repairs Specialists in Plasma, LCD, LED TV’s, can collect. Call: John 600 706 201
UPHOLSTERY wRosanna’s Soft Furnishings Everything you need for a complete makeover. Upholstery, Curtain Making, Blinds, Cushions and more. Alhaurin El Grande Tel: 657 369 343 rosannacarmella@hotmail.com
To advertise in the Sentiyella Pages
WINDOWS & DOORS wDiamond Windows & Doors High quality workmanship, value for money, the best team in the business – ask our customers. www.diamondwindowsanddoors.net. Call 952 665 022 All areas covered.
WINDOW TINTING wWindow Tinting Solscreen - Your Local Coastal Window Film Company - Installing Window Films along the coast since 1999, Solar Control, Privacy, UV Protection, all Professional Grade Window Films. www.solscreen.com 670 765 742 wMobile Service ITV legal Solar reflective tint for glass curtains, balconies, yachts stop fading, heat glare, save money on cooling, make living in the sun comfortable. 958 496 571 / 644 546 176 solarshadetinting@gmail.com
WEB SITES wWebsite hosting for as little as 5€/month. Full website designs and applications for as little as 50/€ month. Call 952 591 071.
WEDDING CARS Email: sentinella.malaga@gmail.com Or Call: 696 116 552 12 months = 49 euros plus IVA
w Wedding Wheels Andalucia - Tel: 650 193 777 Webpage:www.AbsoluteAxarquia.com/services/wed ding_car.html.
WIFI TV w Unifide Group Espana SL - Providing unlimited connection to your life so you can live. IPTV 3G, 4G, computer service online plus many other services. Call: 951 242 435