San Francisco Bay Times - October 31, 2019 Celebrity by San Francisco Bay Times

BAY TIMES S

LGBTQ News & Calendar for the Bay Area

CELEBRATING FOUR DECADES (1978–2019) October 31–November 13, 2019 | http://sfbaytimes.com

LaTonya Lawson of Celebrity Cruises Invites You to:

Soirée on the Bay II Benefiting the Richmond/Ermet Aid Foundation and Honoring Project Open Hand, AGUILAS, and The LGBT Asylum Project Wednesday, November 13 5:30 pm–8:30 pm Aboard the Celebrity Eclipse at San Francisco Pier 27

Thoughts from Evacuation Zone #6 of the Kincade Fire

The spread of the Kincade Fire on that day was kept mostly at bay thanks to the amazing efforts of first responders and firefighters. Like many, we have had to endure the power outages of which we are now in number 4. It seems that we have been out of power for half the month of October! From the Community Perspective

The Wildwood view over the Sonoma Valley as seen from the home of Paul Pendergast and Robert Zelenka near Kenwood in Sonoma County

From the Larger Perspective On the larger perspective, I resist the notion that horrific fires caused by the combination of climate change and poor management by PG&E is “the new norm.” As Governor Newsom said recently, this is California and we are known for our innovation and our ability to overcome challenges. We need to take our “California entrepreneurial spirit” and think outside the box to find long-term solutions to these issues. Addressing the poorly managed power infrastructure and delivery system should be the primary focus. California must bring together the greatest minds in engineering, power generation, energy delivery, and underground utility construction to the table to develop a

Guerneville evacuated

“Marshall-Like Plan’ to address our electrical and power generation needs. We must resist with every fiber of our being the current forces that are attempting to roll back California’s greenhouse gas initiatives. We have to do what we do best in California— use our incredible diversity and economic strength to create a new model of sustainability in the face of natural and man-made disasters.

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PHOTO COURTESY OF BECKY WILLMAN PHOTOGRAPHY

We have many LGBTQ friends here in Sonoma County who have been impacted by the Kincade Fire, and like in 2017, the LGBTQ network kicks into high gear to make sure that everyone is being taken care of. Having moved to San Francisco in 1989 and having lived through the early days of the AIDS crisis, I realize that our community knows how to band together, take care of one another, and make sure that no one is left feeling isolated.

Greg and his team have opened the doors of the Graton Resort to those who have been evacuated and they contribute greatly to the needs of the community with generous financial donations. The LGBTQ community is resilient and we are resourceful, so now is the time when good people become great.

Hacienda Bridge Beach, Guerneville

Paul Pendergast is the CEO of Pendergast Consulting Group, a past president of the Golden Gate Business Association, and one of the founders of Build OUT California, which is the world’s first LGBTQ Industry Association dedicated to the sustainable growth of LGBT owned and certified businesses, and our allies, in the fields of architecture, engineering, construction, real estate development, and related industries. For more information: https://tinyurl.com/y6ecccp4

Smoke from the Kincade Fire in the distance beyond Lytton Springs Winery & Tasting Room

Burning Man Principles Evident During Current CA Crisis Nearly all that remains of oncebeautiful and historic Soda Rock Winery in Healdsburg is Lord Snort, a fantastical sculpture of a boar commissioned for Burning Man by local artist Bryan Tedrick. Soda Rock’s owner Ken Wilson in 2016 purchased the piece, which still stands amidst the smoldering ashes. Unlike the controlled desert dream that is Burning Man, the ongoing fires, evacuations, power outages, and related problems of this month seem like a nightmare come to life. As of this writing, the horrors continue, threatening lives and property throughout the state, and in Northern California particularly impacting the Wine Country towns of Sonoma County. 2

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our inner selves, the reality of those around us, participation in society, and contact with a natural world exceeding human powers. No idea can substitute for this experience.”

The principles of Burning Man have become evident these past few weeks when many are without basics such as power, water, working phones, hot meals, and shelter. Consider the Burning Man principle of Immediacy: “Immediate experience is, in many ways, the most important touchstone of value in our culture. We seek to overcome barriers that stand between us and a recognition of O C TO B E R 3 1 , 2 0 1 9

The present conditions for many are more than challenging, but the face-to-face contact with neighbors, first responders, family, friends, and coworkers continues to soothe and lift our spirits while providing often life-saving connection. Then there is the Burning Man principle of Communal Effort: “Our community values creative cooperation and collaboration. We strive to produce, promote, and protect social networks, public spaces, works of art, and methods of com-

munication that support such interaction.” While the news during most months is full of stories of people harming others, these days we frequently learn about individuals who are going above and beyond their call of duty: the firemen who drove through flames to save entire towns, the gas station owner who brought in generators so that his customers had enough fuel to evacuate, and even the bar manager who kept his business open all night so that customers could calm their frayed nerves in community. Those of us who are LGBTQ tend to place tremendous value on community ties on any given day, much less during a disaster. Over the past

POSTED BY CRISTA LUEDTKE/FACEBOOK

While we find ourselves in Evacuation Zone #6, the Kincade Fire has stayed at a distance from our home. We, like everyone in the Bay Area, endured the hurricane strength winds on Sunday, October 27, and we lost several venerable old oak trees on our property.

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This Year’s Experience

Times like these bring out the best in people from our community, like Greg Sarris, who is the Tribal Chairman of the Federated Indians of Graton Rancheria who own the Graton Resort and Casino. He and others are examples of LGBTQ entrepreneurs from within our community who more than rise to the occasion.

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In 2017 the Tubbs Fire roared down to the west of us, and the Pythian Fire came within 100 yards of our home, but we made it through intact. Each day of the 2017 fires in Sonoma County was excruciating as many of our friends lost their homes in what seemed like a blink of an eye.

decade those ties have been questioned and we often hear statements like, “There goes the gayborhood,” “Gay neighborhoods are an endangered species,” “Gaytrification is pushing us out,” and more. We wish that it did not take a crisis, or even a desired event like Burning Man, to remind us of the importance of community ties, cooperation, and collaboration. “Participation,” yet another Burning Man principle evident now, remains key and perhaps was on the mind of artist Tedrick as he created Lord Snort, which has become an odd landmark in the Kincade Fire zone. As the timeless principle holds, “We make the world real through actions that open the heart.”

POSTED BY ELIZABETH GRIVAS/FACEBOOK

My partner Robert Zelenka and I live near the town of Kenwood in Sonoma County (in the mountains between Sonoma and Santa Rosa). Our place backs up to Hood Mountain State Park, so we have always felt that we are definitely “in the wilderness” on one of the most beautiful north slopes in the Wine Country.

PHOTO COURTESY OF DOMINIC LLOYD

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By Paul Pendergast

GLBT Fortnight in Review By Ann Rostow Paging Dr. Dolittle I don’t know where to start this morning, as my mind is filled with shards of insignificant story bits and pieces that lack any deeper meaning. What do I make, for example, of the headline: “Trans athlete claims lesbians are transphobic for not liking penises?” It seemed promising, but it’s just an oddball trans athlete with bizarre opinions, including the general notion that the only “moral” sexual orientation is pan sexuality, because everyone else is guilty of having “sexual genital preferences.” Okay then! Immoral it is. I also stumbled over the story of a British Member of Parliament, Dawn Butler, who gave what the Daily Mail described as an alarmingly meandering and sweary after-dinner speech for online LGBT newspaper PinkNews the other day. Butler was technically advocating on our behalf, but the tipsy Labour MP also reportedly went off on a rambling tangent about gay giraffes. “If you can teach gayness, then who speaks giraffe? Ninety percent of giraffes are gay. So who the hell speaks giraffe, what does that sound like?” Butler asked her presumably perplexed audience, waving her hands around to make her point. “You can’t teach it, and it’s not a disease either. Being who you are and your true, authentic self is not a disease.” Hear hear! By the way, an article from a few months ago explains that female giraffes are only fertile for a few days every year, so the male giraffes like to mess around with each other in the interim. Are they gay or just bored? Who can say, since as MP Butler correctly observes, none of us speak giraffe so we cannot ask them directly. Oh, and speaking of gay creatures, I have sad news out of the Berlin Zoo, where the egg that was tended by gay penguins Skipper and Ping broke a couple of months ago and turned out to have been a dud. Keepers had given an abandoned egg to the would-be parents, but had no way of knowing whether or not it had been fertilized. The two penguins, who had previously tried to hatch a rock and a fish without success, were extremely diligent in their nesting, but again to no avail. Well, I think you see my problem. Where’s the gestalt? What’s my purpose here? Where do I go now? Impeachment? The transphobia embedded in the marketing of feminine hygiene products? Some gay outreach from Kellogg’s cereal? Legal news? I’m literally at my wit’s end. SCOTUS Notice Okay, okay. Legal news it is! I have New York Law School professor Art Leonard to thank for the news that the High Court has denied review on a case out of New York, where the state appellate court gave primary custody of twins to the unmarried same-sex partner of their biological father. The two men had raised the kids together until they broke up, at which point the bio-Dad took the twins off to Florida without consulting his ex. You may recall the many legal dramas surrounding acrimonious lesbian breakups back before marriage became an option. Some biological mothers used the kids in a hostile tug of war with their former lovers, relying on the conventional legal wisdom that biological parents have a fundamental claim on their kids unless they are deemed unfit. Even-

tually, many courts recognized that the overarching emphasis on the best interests of a child should govern such disputes, and many courts in turn recognized that some ex-partners had formed deep bonds with their children that could not be severed without causing distress. After 2015, these cases became rare as same-sex couples married and as their divorces and custody battles became regulated. In this New York case, the recent precedents weighed in favor of the non-biological Dad. After the state’s high court declined to review the matter, the biological Dad (represented by some antigay lawyers) asked the High Court to take the case and basically renounce recognition of non-married parents as a rule. The High Court has not examined these kinds of parenting cases, and given the rightward slant of the current panel, we don’t particularly want them sticking their noses into the affairs of same-sex families. So it’s all good. Good Cop, Bad Cop In other legal news, a gay Missouri police sergeant has won some $20 million in damages after years of antigay discrimination on the job. A jury in St. Louis awarded Keith Wildhaber, 47, roughly $10 million in damages after he was turned down for 23 promotions in a six-year period, The New York Times reported. He was also awarded another $10 million after the force retaliated against him once he took the police to court. As the foreman told the Times: “We wanted to send a message. If you discriminate, you’re going to pay a big price.” Interestingly, the story was linked to a headline from last June: “Do the police belong at Pride? Marches face a difficult question.” I was vaguely aware that some Pride organizations around the country and in Canada had debated whether or not to allow police contingents in their parades, although I’m not sure that the cops were actively banned in any city with the exception of Toronto. Part of the rationale seems to stem from the fact that the Stonewall riots, which we celebrate at Pride, pitted the GLBT community against the New York City Police. I’ve always felt that the police contingents in our parades reflect the fact that, after half a century, we have healed that rift. Second, the idea that police are intrinsically hostile is not just sophomoric; it’s a stereotype and a generalization. Need we remind ourselves why stereotypes and generalizations are not our thing? Finally, there are gay police like Sergeant Wildhaber in those parade groups. I guess one city let the police join in as long as they didn’t wear uniforms. But where’s the fun in that? Running Up That Hill Count me on the side of Rep. Katie Hill, the bisexual Congresswoman who was essentially hounded out of office after her ex-husband took and posted sexy pics of Hill and a female campaign staffer on the Internet. Hill was also suspected of sleeping with Graham Kelly, her legislative aide, although she adamantly denied the tryst. But unlike the “me too” scandals, Hill has not been accused of any sexual abuse, pressure, or inappropriate shenanigans. So why did she feel compelled to resign? The answer is that what is fun and games for a straight male politician is a (continued on page 26) S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES

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Presidential Candidates Debate an Issue Crucial to the LGBTQ Community over what to do next.”

6/26 and Beyond Stuart Gaffney & John Lewis Hours into the October Democratic Presidential Debate, four of the twelve candidates (Biden, Buttigieg, Castro, and Warren) were asked whether they would favor adding justices to the Supreme Court to protect women’s rights in the event that the Supreme Court overruled Roe v. Wade. The composition of the Court is also of vital importance to the lives of LGBTIQ people and many other Americans as well. Here’s how the candidates responded to this crucial question that rarely receives the attention it deserves. Openly gay South Bend Mayor Pete Buttigieg took a leading role at the debate in advocating structural reform to the Court. Buttigieg is “committed to establishing a commission on day one” of his presidency to “propose reforms to depoliticize” the Court. “We can’t go on like this, where every single time there is a vacancy, we have this apocalyptic ideological firefight

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Buttigieg offered a proposal “to have a 15-member court where five of the members can only be appointed by unanimous agreement of the other 10.” But he emphasized that he was “not wedded to a particular solution” and would also consider possibilities such as term limits or rotating justices to the Supreme Court from the federal appellate bench. Buttigieg asserted that when he first proposed Court reform, “some folks said that was too bold to even contemplate.” But in urging nonpartisanship, Buttigieg did not call out Republican presidents for being far more ideological and partisan in their Supreme Court nominations (such as Robert Bork, Clarence Thomas, and Neil Gorsuch) than Democratic presidents. And he did not explicitly denounce the extraordinary measures Republican Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell undertook to block President Obama’s 2016 nomination of Merrick Garland to the Court and McConnell’s changing the Senate rules to install Trump’s pick Gorsuch. Massachusetts Senator Elizabeth Warren was noncommittal, responding: “I think there are a number of options. I think, as Mayor Buttigieg said, there are many different ways. People are talking about different options, and I think we may have to talk about them.” Warren, not one to shy away from proposing major policy changes,

did not explain whether she would make Court reform a priority. After her initial statement, she quickly pivoted to talk about the substantive issue of abortion, advocating that Congress should enact legislation codifying Roe v. Wade, a position that all four candidates took. Warren’s response did not address the myriad other issues in which the Court plays a decisive role and the problem that a conservative Supreme Court might rule that Congress lacks the power to guarantee access to abortion nationwide in the face of state laws severely restricting or forbidding it. Former Housing and Urban Development Secretary Julian Castro opposed adding additional justices to the Court, making the provocatively worded declaration: “I wouldn’t pack the Court.” Castro acknowledged that Buttigieg’s 15-member Court idea was “interesting,” but opined that “if” he were choosing from one of Buttigieg’s proposals, he would favor term limits for Justices or having justices rotate from the appellate courts. Castro, like all of the candidates, made clear that he would nominate justices “who respect the precedent of Roe v. Wade.” Former Vice President Joe Biden also employed the term “court packing” in firmly opposing adding additional justices to the Court. He reasoned that the Democrats’ adding justices when (continued on page 26)

Business Tips From GGBA Leaders

Inject Your Sales Strategy with Science

GGBA CALENDAR

By Michael Gunther You’ve probably heard plenty about the “art of selling”—the ability to reach your audience on an emotional level by building relationships. But that art is just one aspect of a solid sales strategy. What you don’t often hear about is the science that truly drives the sales effort forward. If you’re struggling to close sales, take time to review the science behind your strategy. When you track your efforts scientifically, you can determine exactly what you need to tweak. Here are four ways to inject science into your sales strategy: 1. Create client profiles. A failure to close sales could stem from targeting the wrong audience. Think about your top 10 clients, and analyze them via psychographic, demographic, and technographic tools. Then go through the same process with your 10 least favorite clients. You’ll soon notice which traits you favor over others. Use that information to create an Ideal Client Profile, and then work to seek out only those clients who fall into that profile. 2. Outline your processes. Every company’s process will be different, but the ultimate goal is to create a step-by-step outline for how you handle sales. That gives you the ability to closely review a single aspect when something isn’t working. For example, some companies benefit from redefining employee roles, while others benefit from changing specific tactics in the sales strategy.

3. Track measurements. Measurements allow you to determine the strength of a sales strategy. Tracking can be as simple as an Excel spreadsheet or a more in-depth Customer Relationship Management tool. Either way, determine whether you need to measure your sales efforts by day, week, month, or quarter, and then track the details of what’s happening with your sales leads. 4. Obtain client feedback. Every time you finish a project, ask your client for feedback on your performance. From their end, there could be things that you just simply don’t see. Review your processes through your client’s eyes to shed new light on client interactions. Bottom Line When sales are flailing, create a hypothesis and test it out. Evaluating your processes and skills from a scientific viewpoint will help you to determine the soft spots in your sales strategy. Continue to measure and fine tune monthly until you are implementing the strategies that will allow you to achieve consistent sales growth. Remember the old sales adage, “sales is either an easy, low performing role or a hard, high performing role”—to grow consistently requires solid effort, hard work, and positive energy to achieve your goals Michael Gunther is a Board Member of the Golden Gate Business Association and leads Collaboration Business Consulting, which is a team of highly skilled business professionals who are dedicated to assisting proactive individuals in building scalable, profitable businesses.

New Member & Ambassador Orientations November 12 Covo 981 Mission Street, SF 5:30 pm–6 pm For more information: events@ggba.com https://bit.ly/31XZCG5 Make Contact Mixer Real Estate Spotlight November 12 Covo 981 Mission Street, SF 6 pm–8 pm Free for Members and Partners; $25 for NonMembers and Non-Partners https://bit.ly/2Py3o6u Make Contact Mixer Insurance Spotlight December 10 Location TBD 6 pm–8 pm Free for Members and Partners; $25 for NonMembers and Non-Partners For more information: events@ggba.com https://bit.ly/2WmspTH

Five Easy Ways to Volunteer with the GGBA Most of us are on overdrive these days with busy schedules, but you can still benefit yourself and your career by getting more involved with the LGBTQ+ business community. Golden Gate Business Association (GGBA) Membership Co-chair Dr. Krystle Drwencke recently shared five easy ways in which you can achieve that goal.

Volunteer for the New Member Orientation and you’ll also get into the Make Contact for free. Attend an orientation yourself on Tuesday, November 12, from 5:30 pm–6 pm at Cova, 918 Mission Street. Register at https://ggba.com/

Krystal Drwencke

1. Help the GGBA to curate monthly events. Each month we highlight a different industry vertical within our membership. This is a great opportunity to highlight new venues, partner with aligned organizations, and bring industry leaders into focus. Each theme can be viewed on the GGBA online calendar: http://business.ggba.com/events/calendar Find an event that speaks to you and reach out to vp@ggba.com to see where that event is in the planning stage. 2. Co-lead a new member orientation. Meet our new members and help them to obtain the tools that they need to engage their membership. New Member Orientations are 30-minute events and take place once each quarter, directly before our monthly Make Contact event.

3. Lead a Member Roundtable. Start the conversation! Member Roundtables are 30-minute events that occur quarterly before our monthly Make Contacts. This is an opportunity to hear feedback from our membership on our current and future programming and what they would like to see the GGBA accomplish. 4. Become an Ambassador. Become familiar with our members and introduce them to others at events. Through helping to facilitate events and programming, you will in be in touch with unique businesses and people! Ambassadors help to tie everything together and help to offer unique insights when they serve on different committees in the organization.

will be ‘Diversity,” and we need your skills, talent, and energy to bring this event to life. Ready to join the GGBA as a volunteer? Reach out to Dr. Krystal Drwencke at VP@ggba.com

5. Be a part of GGBA’s largest event of the year! Power Lunch VI and the Power Pitches is coming soon! The Power Lunch is the GGBA’s flagship event. The next one will be held on March 6, 2020, at the fabulous W Hotel. The theme

GGBA October Make Contact The October Make Contact mixer was held on Tuesday, October 8, at FIDO Systems. A focus of the evening’s Speed Networking was to highlight nonprofit members of GGBA and to acknowledge the important role of organizations in the LGBT community. Prior to the start of the networking mixer, a member roundtable was held where members were encouraged to discuss GGBA’s current programs and services and to suggest future offerings to assist members in achieving business goals.

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Spooked for Change at 1600 Transylvania Avenue Join the BID to WIN!

Now is the time to get involved. Visit Caltrans’ SB1 web site, www.rebuildingca.ca.gov, and learn more about planned improvements. Review Caltrans’ online “look ahead” reports of upcoming construction and architectural and engineering contracts to identify potential opportunities for your business. Attend contract-specific outreach events, that include pre-bid meetings and pre-proposal conferences, and meet with prospective bidders/proposers. Learn about Caltrans contracting requirements at a free training or workshop.

Caltrans needs your help to repair and rebuild California’s transportation system. We are looking for qualified contractors, consultants, suppliers, truckers, and service providers to help fix our roads, freeways, and bridges. Construction look-ahead report: http://www.dot.ca.gov/hq/esc/oe/contractor_info/12_month_ Advertising_Schedule.pdf Architectural and Engineering look-ahead report: http://www.dot.ca.gov/dpac/ae/doc/lookahead.pdf Caltrans Events Calendar: http://www.dot.ca.gov/obeo/calendar.html

For more information, contact Caltrans’ Small Business Advocate at smallbusinessadvocate@dot.ca.gov.

Cross Currents Andrea Shorter

Children at the White House Halloween celebration October 28, 2019

Boo! As I write this, Halloween is upon us, and on the good citizen aka political junky calendar, that means we are but a few days before another election day on Tuesday, November 5. On the surface, this off-year election cycle appears rather hum-drum compared to the palpitating pace of the 2018 mid-term election that delivered the blue wave Democratic majority takeover of the House of Representatives, and restoration of the gavel to second time round Speaker Nancy Pelosi.

or in satirical drag of your favorite political foe. You likely are reading this after Halloween, having seen many venting adults donning Trump or Guiliani masks. Sadly, Halloween has often brought out misguided villains in guise to cast violence and terror onto unsuspecting, innocent partygoers and street revelers. For the LGBT community, we know all too well how a great party can be infiltrated and turned tragic by those who intend harm under the cover of darkness.

The surreal yet very real drama unfolding around the impeachment inquiry of Donald Trump and his (not impeachment related) baffling call and turnabout to pull U.S. troops out of Syria overshadows nearly all other political goings on, including, in part, the Democratic Primary race, which is sucking up much of the air around much less dazzling local, and spots of congressional, elections on Tuesday’s off-year ballot.

Masking as Donald Trump for just a few hours on one evening, likely with cocktails and a few laughs with friends, is frightening enough, and perhaps not nearly as imaginative as one might think. The true horror is a self-proclaimed stable genius whose absurdities and vampirish ways literally suck the life out of everything touched by him.

Still, turnout for local races for your local mayor, district attorney, sheriffs, public defender, city treasurer, city attorney, city council, county supervisor, and other seats throughout California’s municipalities remains a focal point for entrenched local political activists and concerned citizens. My personal endorsements for SF Mayor London Breed, Interim District Attorney Suzy Loftus, County Supervisor Vallie Brown, and Treasurer Jose Cisneros are widely known—not to mention consistent with my crack analyst and sister San Francisco Bay Times columnist Lou Fischer. As usual, Lou’s analysis is spot on, and if you are an SF voter, I highly recommend that you re-read her size-up of the provincial lay of the land in this paper’s previous issue. Of course, vote early if you can. Back to the nightmarish state of affairs known as Daylight vs. Donald Trump and his cast of goons and ghouls. (Read: What happened to you Rudy? You were bad enough, but this? Really?) A major part of Halloween fun is dressing up or masquerading in costume for one night, maybe as your favorite comic book or literary hero

I guess it takes a stable genius not only to claim as a candidate for president that his popularity was so strong that he could shoot someone on 5th Avenue in broad daylight and not be held criminally responsible for assault, but also to—as a president under investigation towards impeachment—convince his attorneys to actually present that absurd argument in a court of law. The argument goes that he, as president, could shoot someone on the street, preferably on 5th Avenue in front of Trump Tower, for no apparent reason, and then not be charged, tried, or jailed because of some imaginary self-imposed diplomatic immunity. WTF? So, if that’s the case, does this mean that a sitting president has immunity to shoot people who didn’t vote for him, or lawmakers who don’t agree with his policies?

and more daylight is cast upon the rot of his self-interested dirty dealings as president through the exorcism aka the impeachment inquiry, the wooden stake is not far behind. Gruesome imagery for sure. Far more gruesome is the sprawling bloody mess he continues to make during his delusional trip through 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, and the cleanup the next president will have to do to restore some semblance of decency and trust in the presidency with what’s left of tattered global alliances. I agree with Mayor Pete: it’s not about going back to normalcy. It’s about going back to a semblance of sanity. This Prince of Darkness must be dragged before the searing glow and glare of daylight. Pray tell before next Halloween, the Democratic nominee will hold the stakes in hand to rid us all of the Nightmare on Pennsylvania Avenue. Andrea Shorter is a Commissioner and the former President of the historic San Francisco Commission on the Status of Women. She is a longtime advocate for criminal and juvenile justice reform, voter rights and marriage equality. A Co-Founder of the Bayard Rustin LGBT Coalition, she was a 2009 David Bohnett LGBT Leadership Fellow at the Harvard Kennedy School of Government.

Yeah, that’s where we are. Can you imagine a candidate Pete Buttigieg, Kamala Harris, Cory Booker, or Amy Klobacher making the same claim? There would be rioting in the streets. Trump is a vampire. He is obviously not the sparkly, glow-y, pretty Edward kind in Twilight. Edward and his kin could survive in daylight. He’s an old school, straight up will die in the sunlight vampire. As more

PHOTO COURTESY OF WHITEHOUSEPHOTOS.COM

Children attending the annual White House Halloween celebration

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PHOTO BY HANNAH DEKKER

California Senate Bill 1 (SB1) will provide $54 billion over the next 10 years for state and local transportation projects. This creates additional opportunities for all small businesses, including businesses owned by women, minorities, disabled veterans, LGBT, and other disadvantaged groups, to participate on public works projects with local and state transportation agencies.

PHOTO BY HANNAH DEKKER

PUBLIC NOTICE: ACCESS TO CALTRANS UPCOMING CONSTRUCTION AND ARCHITECTURAL & ENGINEERING PROJECTS

Dedicated Softball Player Establishes Women’s League in the East Bay

Photos courtesy of John Chen

Sports John Chen In a short three-year span, Wendy Gershow’s vision of establishing a fun and supportive women’s softball league in the East Bay has come to fruition in a big way. Gershow, a native of the San Francisco Bay Area, started playing fastpitch softball in elementary school. Like most players, she eventually transitioned to slow-pitch softball as an adult. She told me for the San Francisco Bay Times: “The transition was fairly easy since the games are similar with one major exception. The ball takes much longer to get to the hitter.” Gershow’s passion for softball stemmed, not just from the game itself, but from the lifelong friendships made and the support gained that kept her in the game and kept her feeling young. “Now that I am older, I have become a mentor,” she says. “I am now able to do for others what my mentors did for me. When I was new to the GSL (Gay Softball League) women’s division, I had great mentors like Tom Vindeed and Bob Docca, guys who had big personalities, got things done, and supported the [LGBT] community like you wouldn’t believe. When you look at my mentors and their mentors, you believe in the passion for the game and the passion in your community.” Living in the East Bay, specifically Alameda, Gershow learned that women mainly played co-ed

softball because there was no women’s league. Although San Francisco has a historic and successful LGBT women’s league, players from the East Bay coming as far as Antioch must make that long commute and conquer the dreaded “maze” just to get to the city. Starting a women’s league in Alameda made a lot of sense due to such a playing gap and because the City of Alameda had been extremely supportive in providing the necessary and all-important fields. The opportunity to give back to the LGBT softball community and to do what her mentors did for her became the main driving force that led Gershow to start the Alameda Women’s Softball League in 2017. Through countless and tireless hours of putting up flyers, posting on social media, and talking to women during co-ed games, Gershow was able to recruit enough women to form a four-team inaugural league with two seasons, Spring and Fall, per year. “Our league is founded on the principles of sportsmanship, fun, mentorship, and passion for the game,” she explains. “Our experienced players help and teach players wanting to learning the game. Our managers and leaders implement rules to help level the playing field. Our league is about having a great time. And just as importantly, we bond as women who love softball.” Poppy Ammon from Castro Valley had been playing in various co-ed leagues for the last 12 years. When she first joined the Alameda Women’s Softball League, Ammon didn’t know what to expect. “The first thing I noticed was how supportive everyone was,” Ammon told me. “If I got a good hit, the other teams

Take Me Home with You!

would cheer and if I did something [that could be corrected], they would take the time to help me improve my game.” Ammon was also very complimentary of Gershow: “Wendy works her butt off so that we (women) can have our own place on the field. She’s constantly recruiting. She umpires all the games. She’ll do just about anything for us to be successful!” At the end of the day, all of Gershow’s hard work has paid off. In just a short three years, the Alameda Women’s Softball League has grown to eight teams, hosts a 10-team tournament, fundraises, and became a member of ASANA (Amateur Sports Alliance of North America), dedicated to the “promotion and participation of LGBTQ+ women in amateur athletics.” (continued on page 26)

Fitness SF Trainer Tip of the Month Brandon V. & Garrett - Fitness SF Mid-Market “Here are four things that you may not know about the Dead-Lift exercise: it contributes to overall better posture, it’s safe because you’re not holding any weight above you, it can be dropped down to the floor if too heavy, and doing regular sets can actually increase your hormone levels.”

Pork Chop

”My name is Pork Chop, and I’m a big ol’ hunk of love! I enjoy meeting all sorts of new people. One of my favorite activities is taking long, leisurely walks and saying hello to everyone I see. If you’re ready to spice up your life with a social butterfly by your side, come and introduce yourself!” Pork Chop is presented to San Francisco Bay Times readers by Dr. Jennifer Scarlett, the SF SPCA’s Co-President. Our thanks also go to Krista Maloney for helping to get the word out about lovable pets like Pork Chop. To meet Pork Chop, as well as other pets seeking their forever homes, please visit: San Francisco SPCA Mission Campus 250 Florida Street San Francisco, CA 94103 415-522-3500

Dr. Jennifer Scarlett and Pup

Aside from major holidays, the Mission Campus adoption center is open Mon–Fri: 1–6 pm and Sat–Sun: 10 am–5 pm. Free parking is available for those wishing to adopt! For more information: https://www.sfspca.org/adoptions 8

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Tore Kelly, Director of Creative & Social Media for Fitness SF, provides monthly tips that he has learned from professional trainers. For more information: https://fitnesssf.com/

Safeguarding a Strategy to Fund More Affordable Housing in Oakland It is vital that we take steps to ensure that funds are accounted for properly, distributed timely, and used effectively by local nonprofits to develop the affordable housing that our community so desperately needs. Councilmember At-Large Rebecca Kaplan was elected in 2008 to serve as Oakland’s citywide Councilmember; she was re-elected in 2016. She also serves on the Alameda County Transportation Commission (ACTC). Follow Councilmember Kaplan on Twitter @Kaplan4Oakland ( https://twitter.com/Kaplan4Oakland ) and Facebook ( https://www.facebook.com/Kaplan4Oakland/ ).

Out of the Closet and into City Hall Oakland City Councilmember At-Large, Rebecca Kaplan Our region is facing a skyrocketing homelessness crisis, with rates rising over 40% in Alameda County over the past couple of years. Meanwhile, even as we work to strengthen shorter-term solutions, we know that we must dramatically expand our supply of permanently affordable housing.

their process to plan ahead and project upcoming impact fees. In addition, they did not have up to date information about funds received. We have continued to work on and research this issue, and are proposing changes to our impact fee laws in order to guarantee accurate tracking and regular reporting of the funds received, and timely deployment of

the funds for affordable housing purposes. Now, these proposals and reports are scheduled to come forward on Tuesday, November 12, to the Community and Economic Development Committee of the Oakland City Council, which meets at 1:30 pm at Oakland City Hall.

Several years ago, Oakland adopted a strategy to fund more affordable housing production by creating an “impact fee” charged on market rate housing, to create an additional funding mechanism that would be used to fund affordable housing development. Last spring, during Oakland’s budget process, I and others asked for information about the amount of money that has come in, and the amounts projected still to come in from those impact fees so that we can deploy them in a timely way to create more affordable housing. Unfortunately, at that time, the Oakland administration did not provide that information, and expressed that it was not

Real Estate

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California’s New Emotional Support Line the Legislature to help even more people.

Assemblymember Phil Ting “They listened with empathy and helped me through my stress. That alleviated my anxiety about the present and future.” That’s testimony from a Californian who called into the San Francisco Peer-Run Warm Line, which has been offering free, non-emergency emotional support via telephone or online chat since 2014. The person was not in crisis, but just needed someone to talk to after finding that other services lacked transgender cultural competency. Suicide hotlines have been around for years, but services such as the “warm line” for people who are not at that stage are less prevalent. The Mental Health Association of San Francisco (MHASF) filled this gap with its Peer-Run Warm Line. After seeing the positive impact this resource was making in the local community, the organization set their sights on making it available statewide and requested funds from

I was proud to work with State Senator Scott Wiener (D-San Francisco) and Governor Newsom to secure $10.8 million over three years in this year’s state budget to broaden the Warm Line’s reach. On October 7, the California Peer-Run Warm Line made its debut—just three days before World Mental Health Day. The number is 1-855-845-7415, and help is also available via online chat at www.mentalhealthsf.org One in six Californians experiences a mental health challenge, with numbers likely higher in the LGBTQ community. According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, LGBTQ individuals are at a higher risk than the general population for suicidal thoughts and attempts, with adults more than twice as likely to experience a mental health condition. The Warm Line complements the current mental health care system by providing another way to save lives and preventing the need for more expensive, crisis-based interventions, like hospitalization. Adding to the program’s success is peer-topeer engagement. The person on the other end of the line, a peer counselor, has gone through similar mental health challenges and can relate with the struggles. Some of the top concerns discussed on the Warm Line include relationship issues, depression, loneliness, drug/alcohol abuse, and homelessness. These problems can reach a crisis point without ongoing support.

While it won’t address all of our mental health needs, the Warm Line can help take pressure off other local programs as they serve more people. For now, it’s staffed every day beginning at 7 am. The call center closes on weekdays at 11 pm, Saturdays at 3 pm, and Sundays at 9 pm. The goal is to ramp up to 24/7 service by the end of the year. About 25,000 calls are expected to come in every year. The state has also made other investments to address the mental health needs of its population. While many of our programs are operated at the county level, they’re funded by a portion of the state sales tax and the Proposition 63 millionaire’s tax allocated through the state budget. I am especially proud of our Housing and Homelessness Package in this year’s state budget, which includes a wholeperson care initiative, incorporating comprehensive mental health services to help get people off the streets. The California Peer-Run Warm Line is off to a great start with nearly 600 calls in the first week. Those numbers highlight not only the need for emotional support, but also a craving for it. I truly believe that when addressing issues surrounding health, the conversation must also include emotional wellness. I’m committed to looking for more ways to boost our mental health system. Phil Ting represents the 19th Assembly District, which includes the Westside of San Francisco along with the communities of Broadmoor, Colma and Daly City.

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Domestic Violence able solutions to relationship problems. But what is there to negotiate when you’re being beaten? If you were being mugged by a stranger on the street, would the solution to your “problem” be for the two of you to sit down and “discuss your differences?” Of course not. Why should it be any different with a partner?

Roland Schembari and Bill Hartman, Co-Founders Randy Alfred, Founding News Editor 1978 Kim Corsaro Publisher 1981-2011

2261 Market Street, No. 309 San Francisco CA 94114 Phone: 415-601-2113 525 Bellevue Avenue Oakland CA 94610 E-mail: editor@sfbaytimes.com www.sfbaytimes.com The Bay Times was the first newspaper in California, and among the first in the world, to be jointly and equally produced by lesbians and gay men. We honor our history and the paper’s ability to build and strengthen unity in our community. The Bay Times is proud to be the only newspaper for the LGBT community in San Francisco that is 100% owned and operated by LGBT individuals. Dr. Betty L. Sullivan Jennifer L. Viegas Co-Publishers & Co-Editors

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CONTRIBUTORS Writers Rink, Sister Dana Van Iquity, Ann Rostow, Patrick Carney, Kate Kendell, Alex Randolph, Heidi Beeler, Gary M. Kramer, Dennis McMillan, Tom Moon, Tim Seelig, Cinder Ernst, John Chen Rafael Mandelman, Jewelle Gomez, Phil Ting, Rebecca Kaplan, Kin Folkz, Leslie Katz, Philip Ruth, Peter Gallotta, Bill Lipsky, Karen Williams, Donna Sachet, Gary Virginia, Zoe Dunning, Marcy Adelman, Stuart Gaffney & John Lewis Brandon Miller, Jamie Leno Zimron Michele Karlsberg Lyndsey Schlax, Randy Coleman, Debra Walker, Howard Steiermann, Andrea Shorter, Lou Fischer, Karin Jaffie, Brett Andrews, Karen E. Bardsley, David Landis Photographers Rink, Phyllis Costa, Jane Higgins Paul Margolis, Chloe Jackman, Bill Wilson, Jo-Lynn Otto, Sandy Morris, Abby Zimberg, Morgan Shidler, JP Lor ADVERTISING Display Advertising Standard Rate Cards http://sfbaytimes.com/ or 415-503-1375 Custom ad sizes are available. Ads are reviewed by the publishers. National Advertising: Contact Bay Times / San Francisco. Represented by Rivendell Media: 908-232-2021 Circulation is verified by an independent agency Reprints by permission only.

Examined Life Tom Moon, MFT (Editor’s Note: Tom Moon is on vacation/hiatus. This is one of his more popular past columns.) Q: My partner dislocated my shoulder last week in an unprovoked attack. He hit me for the first time about two months after we met, and it stunned me so much that I didn’t say a word. Since then it’s gotten worse and worse. At first I kept my friends from knowing, but now I can’t hide the black eyes, broken nose, and bruises from them. I’ve tried to get him to get therapy to find out why he’s so angry, but he says he doesn’t need help. I really love this man, and I want to save our relationship. Can you refer me to a good couples counselor who can help us? A: No, I’m afraid I can’t. The purpose of couples therapy is to negotiate mutually accept-

The Excelerate Foundation, a private grantmaking organization that supports charities addressing problems and opportunities in American communities, has bestowed its Leadership Award on Dr. Karyn Skultety, Executive Director of Openhouse. “Excelerate Foundation created this award to recognize outstanding progress and leadership in social change and community development,” said J. Alex Sloan, Chairman and President of the Foundation. “We reserve this award for the few who are making a palpable difference in the communities where they live and work, and we feel Karyn Skultety is actually helping change the landscape of LGBT aging in San Francisco.” This is only the second time that the Excelerate Foundation has presented the Leadership Award in 11 years.

Dr. Skultety joined Openhouse as Executive Director in 2017. Since then she has almost doubled the size of the only organization in Northern California exclusively serving LGBT seniors with housing, housing assistance, social services, and community engagement. Prior to Openhouse, she served as Vice President of Health Services at the Institute on Aging in San Francisco. She holds a Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology from the University of Massachusetts, specializing in geriatric psychology. Under her leadership, Openhouse opened California’s first LGBT-welcoming affordable housing development for LGBT seniors at the organization’s Laguna Street campus, which now includes 119 units of affordable housing as well as activity and office space. Openhouse services have expanded under her leadership, including the launch of an innovative partnership with On Lok to open a first-of-a-kind program aimed

approved by the Board of Supervisors, is the largest affordable housing bond in city history.

Aging in Community A critical measure on the November ballot will fund new affordable homes and housing for LGBTQ youth and seniors, veterans, low income working families, teachers, and first responders without raising taxes. Proposition A, co-sponsored by Mayor Breed and Board President Norman Yee, and unanimously

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If you need to move out, temporarily or permanently, then do it. Don’t hesitate at all to involve the police or to obtain a restraining order, if necessary. If friends can help, don’t think twice about involving them, and don’t try to protect your partner by hiding the truth from them. If you’re not sure how to proceed, find a counselor in your area with an expertise in domestic violence.

Maybe this isn’t the kind of advice that you want to hear. One of the most common characteristics of victims of domestic violence is a wholly unwarranted sense of responsibility for the violence they’re enduring. Sometimes it seems as if the basic instinct for self-preservation has been short-circuited, so that, instead of feeling outraged when attacked, they feel guilty and ashamed. Some are more concerned with “helping” the abuser than with protecting themselves, and the idea of leaving the perpetrator feels like an unthinkable act of disloyalty.

A book that might help you to think more clearly about your situation is Men Who Beat the Men Who Love Them, by Patrick Letellier and David Island. It’s full of intimate knowledge of the issue, because one of the authors was himself a victim of prolonged domestic violence. This book can help you to think more clearly about your real responsibilities in this situation, and it will provide some valuable advice about how to proceed.

All too often the abusers have the opposite psychology. Instead of feeling guilty and overly responsible, they resist assuming any personal responsibility for their actions. They don’t “own” their internal states, but see their feelings, especially their disappointments and frustrations, as caused completely by external factors. Many actually see themselves as the innocent victims of the partners they beat. Their fundamental problem is usually not anger, as you seem to believe, but control (which is why placating

Don’t imagine that you’re doing your partner any favors by enduring the abuse. When you put up with it, you’re probably validating his insane belief that you deserve the treatment you’re getting. Your partner has a serious problem, and it’s his responsibility to recognize that fact and to get help for it. Your responsibility is to yourself—to defend your basic human right to physical safety. Tom Moon is a psychotherapist in San Francisco. For more information, please visit his website http://tommoon.net/

Karyn Skultety, PhD

Excelerate Foundation board members with Openhouse's Karyn Skultety

at reaching LGBT seniors at risk of nursing home placement. In early 2020, Openhouse will open its new two-story community center at 75 Laguna, expanding capacity to serve up to 5,000 seniors with onsite services and programming.

strong intergenerational community with LGBTQ older adults at its center, and combat ageism wherever it marginalizes seniors and makes them feel invisible,” Dr. Skultety said, accepting the honor at the Foundation’s recent Leadership Award Luncheon.

“I am so honored by this recognition from the Excelerate Foundation and for the opportunity to work with Alex and Excelerate’s board to build a

The award comes with a $5,000 prize for the recipient and a $5,000 grant for the organization.

ket is nearly impossible to find. And if they sleep on the streets or in shelters, LGBTQ youth are in harm’s way, exposed to the trauma of exploitation and harassment, at best.

to have children than heterosexual older adults. These factors contribute to LGBTQ older adults having fewer resources and supports to help them age or to continue to age well in their home and in their community.

Vote Yes on Prop A

Dr. Marcy Adelman

I suggest that your first order of business should be to make a commitment to yourself that you’re never going to allow yourself to be beaten again, and then put a stop to it. How do you do that? I don’t know enough about your situation to advise you on all of the steps that you need to take, but the first step is for you to decide that you’re willing to do whatever you have to do to ensure your safety.

an enraged batterer doesn’t help). They dominate and attack their partners as a way of getting some sense that they’re in control of themselves. That’s why they’re often the most dangerous when the partner threatens to leave. Losing a partner endangers their fragile sense of self.

Excelerate Foundation Honors Openhouse Executive Director with Leadership Award

You might not like to hear your partner compared to a mugger, but the fact is that he’s mugging you repeatedly. What you’re describing is battery. Criminal behavior and gross violations of your basic human rights are not items that should be on the table for negotiation.

Once you’ve established your personal safety, couples counseling may make sense. But the first order of business should be to settle the question of whether your partner can have a relationship with you without beating you. If he can’t, then you’re better off living without his “love.”

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It won’t solve the housing crisis. But it will keep many low and middleincome residents from displacement. Over the next four years, San Francisco would use the funds to build some 2,800 affordable housing units, repair existing public housing, and provide subsidies to upgrade rental housing for low-income individuals and families. Prop A is a $600 million affordable housing bond and it needs a twothirds vote to pass. Your vote really would help to secure affordable housing for thousands of San Franciscans. LGBTQ youth make up almost half of San Francisco's homeless youth population. Leaving unsupportive families or abusive situations, they seek a safe harbor, acceptance, and a place where they can be themselves. But safe and affordable shelter in San Francisco›s inflated housing mar-

Young trans women are especially vulnerable. They are more likely to be targets of discrimination and violence. Prop A will provide safe, stable, and supportive housing for LGBTQ youth. With your vote, Prop A will pass. Another community in dire need of housing assistance in San Francisco consists of seniors, 30% of whom live in poverty, and struggle to access needed service and affordable housing. In comparison with their heterosexual peers, LGBTQ seniors face additional difficulties, such as diminished informal support networks and fewer housing options due to persistent discrimination. San Francisco LGBTQ seniors are twice as likely to be single and to live alone, and four times more likely not

LGBTQ seniors feel that they have few safe housing options. National and local studies have shown that the majority of LGBTQ older adults feel it would be unsafe to be “out” in senior care facilities. The data (continued on page 26)

Alegre Home Care is proud to support Dr. Marcy Adelman’s Aging in Community column in the San Francisco Bay Times.

Pride Day at Cal to Take Place on November 9 Cal Athletics, in partnership with the Gender Equity Resource Center, is sponsoring a Pride Celebration where the Golden Bears football team will host Washington State at California Memorial Stadium on Saturday, November 9. The kickoff time will be announced once TV selections are made.

ences and similarities alike.

Demonstrating an unwavering commitment to diversity, equity, and inclusion in every part of their organization is one of Cal Athleticsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; strategic priorities. This extends from recruiting student-athletes, to hiring and retention practices, and to the culture of respect that exists within the department. Cal Athletics strives to celebrate, recognize, and value differ-

Fans can participate in Pride Day at Cal by purchasing a special ticket for $35, which includes a complimentary pride t-shirt. The ticket is available through a special online link: https://www.fevo.com/edp/PRIDE-Celebration--Cal-vs-Washington-State-6Cee4hF Fans will be able to pick up their shirts at Tailgate Town, which will open three hours before kickoff and is located on Maxwell Family Field, directly north of Memorial Stadium. Fans should bring a confirmation email as proof of purchase. Details on other specific events and activities around the game will be announced after the game time is determined. The Pac12 will announce the kickoff time and TV network by no later than Sunday, November 3. For any questions or additional information regarding tickets, please contact Audrey Murray at 510-642-2671 or amurray4@berkeley.edu

Billy Curtis, Director, UC Berkeley Gender Equity Resource Center

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This Old Bag BCEF 15th Annual Handbag Auction

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LGBTQ News & Calendar for the Bay Area CELEBRATING FOUR DECADES (1978–2019)

The Fairmont San Francisco was the glamorous setting for the annual Breast Cancer Emergency Fund (BCEF) benefit affectionately titled This Old Bag with the subtitle “The Power of the Purse.” Media personality Liam Mayclem served as emcee and auctioneer for the event, which attracted LGBT community members and allies as well as sponsor representatives. Celebrities donating items this year included Sharon Stone, Linda Ronstadt, Ayesha Curry, Mindy Kaling, Julian Lopez, Chelsea Handler, Kristen Bell, Debbie Harry, Minnie Driver, Allison Janney, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, and more. Congratulations to the entire staff and volunteer team on the success of this year’s This Old Bag, including Executive Director Karen Edwards, Board Chair Cynthia Hester, and a special nod to admired LGBT community supporter and BCEF staff member Joanie Juster.

PHOTO BY RINK

HRC San Francisco Bay Area 35th Annual Gala & Auction HRC-SF’s much anticipated Annual Gala & Auction was held at the Hyatt Embarcadero on Saturday, October 19. Preceded by a festive reception and followed by a lively after party, the dinner and program featured keynote remarks by HRC President Alphonso David. Honorees included Levi Strauss & Company, HRC Corporate Equality Award, accepted by Executive Vice President and President of Levi Strauss America Roy Bagattini; performer, producer and writer Eugene Lee, HRC Visibility Award; and John Lake, Charles M. Holmes Community Service Award. Congratulations to the staff and volunteer team and special thanks to longtime HRC national and local leader Frank Woo. https://www.hrc.org/local-issues/community/san-francisco

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PHOTO BY RINK

PHOTO BY DAVID PERRY PHOTO BY RINK

PHOTO BY DAVID PERRY

PHOTO BY RINK PHOTO BY RINK

PHOTO BY RINK

PHOTO COURTESY OF KELLY RIVERA HART

PHOTO BY RINK

https://bcef.org/

Photos by Rink

By Donna Sachet

f you’ve never participated in Litquake, make a point to do so next year! Founded 20 years ago by Jack Boulware and Jane Ganahl, a couple of friends, it has quickly grown from a local curiosity, supporting books, literature, and those who love them, to a national model, replicated across the continent. We joined a panel on one of the last nights of the ten-day event at the San Francisco Center for the Book, 375 Rhode Island Street. We offer the address because it is well worth a visit for anyone interested in printing, both historically and technically; the huge iron printing presses on display evoked a time when printing revolutionized public education. The topic was Mason Funk’s The Book of Pride, featuring a cross-section of out individuals who have played some part in the history of our civil rights movement. Scott James, published journalist and frequent contributor to The New York Times, led the panel of Mason, Terry Baum, and Kitty Tsui, and this humble columnist. Each of us was given the opportunity to present our own story and the discussion was lively. Watch for Litquake next year to participate in panel discussions, readings, and the single day of Lit Crawl, taking place at various locations all over town. It is a must for lovers of the written word! As a member of the Board of Directors of the Rainbow Honor Walk, responsible for the bronze plaques you see in the sidewalks of the Castro neighborhood recognizing LGBTQ trailblazers, we were happy to join in a celebration dinner last week at Catch, saluting David Perry’s ten years of leadership on this board. Most of the board was there to thank David and to send him off with gratitude and confidence in the continued work of Rainbow Honor Walk. Watch for new plaques to appear this spring, including Gladys Bentley, Leonard Matlovich, Maurice Sendak, Sylvia Rivera, Vito Russo, Quentin Crisp, and Divine! This Old Bag, benefiting the Breast Cancer Emergency Fund, is a truly unique annual fundraiser where handbags are the item of the night, both silent auction and live auction. This year’s event was a hit, newly located to the less used Pavilion of the Fairmont Hotel, so that patrons entered down a long hall lined with handbags in the silent auction, each with a story, either donated by a prominent retailer or celebrity or given in memory or tribute to someone who has experienced breast cancer. The variety was so tempting that bidding by phone began immediately! We chatted with Joanie Juster, Cal Callahan, Neil Figurelli, Gary Virginia, John Weber, and many more. Once in the Pavilion, a splendidly warm night invited guests to take cocktails out onto the garden area where fabulous City views beckoned and friends mingled amiably. On the handsome arm of Michael Loftis, we joined Gus & Bahya Murad, Judith Branch, Jan Wahl, John Newmeyer, Jack Ryder, John Rosin, and many others. After a few hours of vigorous silent bidding, the live auction began, skillfully orchestrated by Liam Mayclem, The Foodie Chap, and more funds were raised with enthusiasm, including during a fund-a-need section. From the smiling faces and shopping bag toting attendees, This Old Bag found new success this year and their important work providing emergency assistance to those impacted by breast cancer will continue. The final Daytime Disco atop the Virgin Hotel was a rollicking success with DJ Wayne G and Brian Kent pulling in a tremendous, capacity crowd for fun in the sun! Watch for new and exciting events here as Virgin Hotel joins the list of LGBTQ friendly hotels offering new experiences to our community.

–David Friedman, composer & lyricist

Calendar a/la Sachet Every Sunday Sunday’s a Drag! The Starlight Room Sir Francis Drake Hotel 10:30 am Brunch, 11:30 am Show $75 inclusive https://starlightroomsf.com/sundays-a-drag Through November 10 Terror Vault Peaches Christ’s annual haunted house experience Old Mint, 88 Fifth Street 6:30 pm–9:30 pm $62 https://www.intothedarksf.com/terror-vault Wednesday, November 6 Safeway Holiday Ice Rink in Union Square Opening Union Square Celebrity appearances, special performances 9:30 am Free! https://unionsquareicerink.com/san-francisco-events/ Thursday, November 7 Cirque du Soleil’s Amaluna Oracle Park Parking Lot 7 pm $54 & up https://www.cirquedusoleil.com/amaluna Wednesday, November 13 Celebrity Soirée on the Bay Richmond/Ermet fundraiser on a Celebrity cruise ship THE event of the season $100 www.reaf.org PHOTO BY RINK

Donna’s Chronicles

“We can be kind. We can take care of each other. We can remember that deep inside we all need the same thing.”

This column is notably shorter, not for lack of events happening all the time, but due to our own relocation, involving that dreaded packing and unpacking that we have all experienced and most likely hated. Fortunately, it will soon be behind us and we’ll be out there more often once again. Until then, imagine finding closet space for 20 wigs, 40 cocktail dresses, 30 gowns, etc., etc., and take pity on this beleaguered drag queen. We’ll be back very soon! Donna Sachet is a celebrated performer, fundraiser, activist and philanthropist who has dedicated over two decades to the LGBTQ Community in San Francisco. Contact her at empsachet@gmail.com

Donna with San Francisco Bay Times contributor Brett Andrews, PRC Executive Director, at the San Francisco Fairmont Hotel on October 5 for the Horizons Foundation Gala. PHOTO BY SHAWN NORTHCUTT

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Celebrity Cruises and REAF to Host Second Annual Soirée on the Bay Charity Event On Wednesday, November 13, Celebrity Cruises will host the second annual Soirée on the Bay, a charity event aboard their luxurious Eclipse ship benefiting the local LGBTQ community. Celebrity Cruises celebrates Love and Diversity all year long and across their fleet and has been honored as Most Gay-Friendly Cruise Line. This year’s Soirée on the Bay will continue to excite guests with an onboard preview of their award-winning culinary offerings, wine list, craft cocktails, and unique entertainment. The event will benefit the Richmond Ermet AID Foundation (REAF). Also returning this year as a sponsor is LGBT community media partner the San Francisco Bay Times. “Celebrity Cruises prides itself on giving back to the communities it serves. As the first cruise line to host a same sex wedding, a partner of MeetMeOnboard ( https:// MeetMeOnboard.com ), and winner of the annual CRUIZIE award among others, we continue to uphold our devotion to our LGBTQ guests. It has been our honor to partner with charities like REAF to raise funds and awareness in the San Francisco Bay Area. We look forward to hosting everyone on our gorgeous ship, The Eclipse,” said Scott Clifton, Area Market Director of Celebrity Cruises.

As the Co-founder of The LGBT Asylum Project (along with Adam Sandel), he helps LGBT individuals to find legal asylum here. They often have fled from other countries where they would either be imprisoned or put to death for being gay. Sengun will be joined by two clients whom the Asylum Project recently helped to gain asylum from their home country of Myanmar. The evening will include underwaterthemed entertainment, live music, dancing, and special guest appearances/performances including Franc Franc D’Ambrosio D’Ambrosio. Bestknown for his impressive portrayal of the lead role in Andrew Lloyd Webber’s Tony Awardwinning musical The Phantom of the Opera, D’Ambrosio performed as the famed masked man more than 2,100 times. Affectionately known as the “Iron Man of the Mask,” he held the title of “The World’s LongestRunning Phantom” for more than a decade after bringing over five million theatre-goers to their feet in a 6-1/2-year run.

will present them with recognition awards. They include AGUILAS—in recognition of their 25th anniversary this year—and Project Open Hand—in recognition of their 34th anniversary. AGUILAS provides HIV education and outreach to the Bay Area Latino community. Project Open Hand provides meals with love to people disabled with HIV, or other critical illnesses, as well as to homebound seniors. “We are excited to be the beneficiary of this event for the second year in a row and proud to have Celebrity Cruises as our ongoing official cruise partner,” said Ken Henderson, Executive Director of REAF. “Last year, Celebrity went all out to make sure this soldout party was first class all the way and our guests have not stopped talking about it. The fact that we can use this party to also bring attention to the 3 other charities we will be recognizing is just icing on the cake.” The emcees will be award-winning journalists Dion Lim and Dan Ashley of ABC7 News. Mayor London Breed has confirmed attendance and will San Francisco Mayor give remarks at the London Breed event.

What: Soirée on the Bay II aboard the luxurious Celebrity Eclipse® Where: San Francisco Cruise Terminal, Pier 27, San Francisco When: Wednesday, November 13 Time: 5:30 pm to 8:30 pm Why: Several LGBT organizations will be honored including: AGUILAS and their 25th anniversary, Project Open Hand, and The LGBT Asylum Project Beneficiary: Proceeds benefit the Richmond/Ermet Aid Foundation (REAF), which funds HIV services, nutritional programs, and programs that help homeless youth. Tickets are $120 per person Purchase Tix: https://bit.ly/2ovTeZ7 More Info: https://www.reaf-sf.org/ Celebrate onboard the luxurious Celebrity Eclipse®, with exquisite culinary offerings and engaging entertainment. Please note that for security reasons, all ticket purchases and media RSVPs must be received/purchased by November 3 to allow for ship manifest verification.

Celebrity Edge private jacuzzi

REAF will also announce two agencies as beneficiaries of their ‘Help is on the Way for the Holidays XVIII” concert & gala, and

“The Boy in the Bubble” at Soirée on the Bay I aboard Celebrity Solstice (2018)

In January of 2018 aboard Celebrity Equinox, Captain Dimitrios Manetas officiated the first ever same-sex marriage at sea for the happy couple, Francisco Vargas and Benjamin Gray. 16

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PHOTO BY JP LOR PHOTOGRAPHY

PHOTO COURTESY OF CELEBRITY CRUISES

PHOTO BY MICHEL VERDURE

Honored guests will be Okan Sengun, Founder of The LGBT Asylum Project. Sengun immigrated to San Francisco from Turkey 10 years ago, completed law school here and is the founding attorney of Okan

Immigration Law Group, a private law group that handles marriage-based green card and naturalization applications as well as asylum cases based on political opinion, race, nationality, and religion.

Honoring LaTonya Lawson: LGBTQ Ally and Advocate

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LGBTQ News & Calendar for the Bay Area CELEBRATING FOUR DECADES (1978–2019)

LaTonya Lawson of Celebrity Cruises is a remarkable ally and advocate for the LGBTQ community in the San Francisco Bay Area region as well as nationally and internationally. Her local advocacy work includes supporting numerous nonprofits, such as the Richmond Ermet Aid Foundation (REAF), the Academy of Friends, the San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus, and others.

Internationally, she helped to make possible the first ever same-sex marriage at sea. This historic event took place in January 2018 aboard the Celebrity Equinox, where Francisco Vargas and Benjamin Gray exchanged vows. She also helped to make possible the largest Pride celebration at sea. Celebrity’s Pride at Sea event now happens each June.

PHOTO BY ELIZABETH HERREN

Nationally, she ensures that Celebrity Cruises keeps the LGBTQ community and its concerns at the forefront of Celebrity’s efforts to promote diversity both within the company and for the benefit of guests. Celebrity’s LaTonya Lawson and Spritz PR’s Beth Schnitzer in the SF Pride Parade (2017)

Thanks in large part to her tireless efforts, Celebrity was named the LGBTQ+ Friendly Travel Company of the year in 2016 and this year received the coveted CRUIZIE Award for Best Large Ship Cruise Line for LGBTQ+ Passengers.

PHOTO BY RINK

PHOTO COURTESY OF CELEBRITY CRUISES

Lawson helped to make possible the Soirée on the Bay, an annual local event that was launched last year. For the 2019 Soirée, Project Open Hand, AGUILAS, and The LGBT Asylum Project will be honored. With beauty and grace, she has honored and benefited countless others over the years.

Celebrity’s LaTonya Lawson (right) with Beth Schnitzer and Lenny Broberg at the Richmond/Ermet Aid Foundation One Night Only Benefit Cabaret (2018)

LaTonya Lawson aboard the San Francisco Bay Times VIP Gray Line tour vehicle in the SF Pride Parade (2017)

Celebrity Solstice executives welcomed guests aboard the ship at Soirée on the Bay I (2018).

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OurTownSF Nonprofit Expo 2019

Photos by JP Lor

The San Francisco LGBTQ resource fair, organized annually by OurTownSF, was held on Saturday, October 19, at the Eureka Valley Recreation Center. The event brought together more than 150 groups focused on diverse topics, including arts, community, fundraising, health, legal, political, recovery, spirituality, and more. Entertainment was provided by the San Francisco Lesbian/Gay Freedom Band and Vanessa Bousay, plus a blessing conducted by the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence. Book signings featured authors Cleve Jones, Toni Newman, Jim Provenzano, and Anand Vedawala. Congratulations to Paul Margolis and the entire team of volunteers and supporters on the success of this year’s event. http://www.ourtownsf.org

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LGBTQ News & Calendar for the Bay Area CELEBRATING FOUR DECADES (1978–2019)

Halloween, Gay High Holy Day

PHOTOS BY RINK

TLC: Tears, Laughs and Conversation Dr. Tim Seelig

Halloween has a very crooked road and very mixed metaphors. It’s not unlike the confusion at the holidays surrounding Christmas: the manger and the North Pole fighting for top billing. Or Easter with the cross, colored eggs, and bunnies. Yes, indeed, Halloween has lots of twists and turns: pagan and Christian. Reading about it, I can see that there is no wonder that evangelical folks do not allow their children to celebrate Halloween. Growing up, our church held “Harvest Celebrations” at the church. No costumes. No candy. No witches or devils, for god’s sake. No debauchery or human sacrifices. Just applebobbing, Cornhole, and prayer for the heathen children dressed up and raking in treats unimaginable. OK, I digress. But that’s the truth. 2,000 years ago, the Celts celebrated their new year on November 1.This day marked the end of summer and the harvest and the beginning of the dark, cold winter, a time of year that was often associated with human death. Celts believed that on the night before the new year, the boundary between the worlds of the living and the dead became blurred. On the night of October 31 they celebrated Samhain, when it was believed that the ghosts of the dead returned to Earth. To commemorate the event, Druids, Celtic priests, built huge sacred bonfires, where the people gathered to burn crops and animals as sacrifices to the Celtic deities. During the cel-

ebration, the Celts wore costumes, typically consisting of animal heads and skins, and attempted to tell each other’s fortunes. Enter Christians stealing the fun. On May 13, 609 A.D., Pope Boniface IV dedicated the Pantheon in Rome in honor of all Christian martyrs, and the Catholic feast of All Martyrs Day was established in the Western church. Pope Gregory III later expanded the festival to include all saints as well as all martyrs, and moved the observance from May 13 to November 1. Then it jumped the Atlantic. Borrowing from European traditions, Colonial Americans began to dress up in costumes and go house to house asking for food or money, a practice that eventually became today’s “trick-or-treat” tradition. Young women believed that on Halloween they could divine the name or appearance of their future husband by doing tricks with yarn, apple parings, or mirrors. This is one tradition that the gays should definitely revive. Confused with the path our Halloween took along its way? Me too. But here we are. We now celebrate the harvest by dressing in fabulous and outrageous costumes. We gather in a variety of places. We still go from door to door of bars. We linger in the streets as if it were the Easter Parade. Over the years, those dressing up have decreased in number such that we now see lots of lookie-loo’s who don’t want to go to the trouble to dress up, but who instead just gawk at those who had the courage, for one night a year, to become someone else! And what is really confusing is that we do not celebrate Halloween on October 31. We celebrate it on the Saturday before the 31st, to avoid school nights. If Halloween is a High Holy Day for the gays, San Francisco provides a smorgasbord available in no other city in the world. Certainly a world away from the Harvest Celebrations of my youth. “Saints and Spinners” Spinning with the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence. “Daytime Disco T-Dance” at the Virgin Hotel.

Cliff’s Variety store window (2019)

Saturday before Halloween on Castro Street (2018)

“Drop Dead Sexy at the Kabuki Hotel.”

in Snickers for Godiva. But the hills.

olate. Vegan. Lactose intolerant. Gluten free.

“Nightmare on Van Ness,” which is actually trying to drive on that.

So, Clara’s Dad will join with the other parents in scouting out whatever the girls want to do— decided at the very last minute. We don’t yet know what her generation will be called since we already used Z! But if Generation Z makes plans last minute, this new one may just never make a plan.

And yet, she loves it so much. As do her friends. They have no idea what they are missing from the “olden days,” except for what I will most definitely tell her! For Halloween, her rock band the “Kawaii Pomeranians” gave a concert—playing both of the songs they know. The attendees were all dressed up for Halloween. The parents (and grandparents) got to have beer!

“Scare Grove,” “Bootie SF” at DNA Lounge, ”Halloween Cruise” on the Hornblower. “Cabargay” with the San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus. Reading that list, I do not see one Celtic bonfire. No animal skins or sacrifices. No crops burned.

They will not be going door to door for bread. They will not be going door to door for Martini’s. They will not be going door to door for a variety of things that we used to get, such as homemade popcorn balls, caramel apples, cookies, brownies. No more. Even well wrapped candy gets an eyebrow from some. Small toys or tchotchkes are good. We hated people who gave us erasers instead of peanut M&M’s.

What I do know is how an 8-year-old celebrates Halloween in San Francisco. I know it firsthand. Clara has been planning her costume for months. She and her girlfriends have wavered. They are too young for the cartoon characters. We used to grab three cardboard boxes, paint them silver, and be a robot; or find an old sheet and become Caspar the Friendly Ghost in about 2 minutes. But, no. When I asked if she wanted me to take her costume shopping, she simply replied, “No thanks. Amazon!” How about Sponge Bob? “Really, Bop Bop?” Last year, she was Rey from Star Wars. That’s so 2018. They are going as either doughnuts or witches. And what will they do? They live in nice neighborhoods, so they may Trick or Treat near home. But they have also heard of a neighborhood in Mill Valley with the best treats in the Bay Area! Seriously. Pac Heights also has great treats—trading

Clara will come home with a plastic pumpkin full of “treats” that have been swept with the care of a TSA agent. They will be made with great concern to avoid all allergies, keeping in mind that there will be children who are allergic to most of the things that we used to eat. No nuts. No dairy. No choc-

At the end of the day, Halloween is a fun holiday. I’m not sure the Druids would approve. It’s a long way from animal skin costumes to the Dominatrix or Sexy Nurse! I am absolutely certain Pope Gregory III would be pissed off. Our Colonial Forefathers would be very confused. The evangelicals are still afraid of the witches and devils. And now we grandparents just say, “Kids today …” and indulge their every wish. Am I dressing up? Haven’t decided. I’ll let Clara decide and make sure that she orders me a strawberry glazed doughnut costume—with sprinkles—in Adult XL.

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So, I went to the History Channel ( https://www.history.com/ ) to get an idea of the origins. Oh my. If you have time, go look it up. I am not a historian, but there were some amazing discoveries. I’ll summarize: Halloween is perhaps our oldest shared holiday. It’s older than Christmas! Sorry, baby Jesus.

Sister Dana leading the Children’s Halloween Parade on Castro Street (2013)

Hope you have a blessed holiday however you choose to celebrate it. Dr. Tim Seelig is the Artistic Director of the San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus.

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Today’s article comes out on October 31. It’s Halloween! Of course, this brought me to thinking about the holiday, how I observed it as a boy, how Clara (my granddaughter) celebrates it today and what everyone is doing to commemorate a holiday for which no one really knows the “Why?”

COM THEOCCULTMUSEUM.

SCENTBASE.CO

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Historic Halloween images (early 20th Century)

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Sister Dana Sez: Words of Wisdumb from a Fun Nun Idol finalist Effie Passero performed at the event.

Sister Dana sez, “Happy Halloween (or HallowQueen to some of us)! Orange used to be my favorite color for Halloween; but now the Orange Oligarchic Ogre in the White House has ruined that for me. I guess it’s back to black.” Mayor London Breed and District 2 Supervisor Catherine Stefani hosted a ceremony on October 17 commemorating the 30th anniversary of the 1989 LOMA PRIETA EARTHQUAKE. First responders recounted their experiences during and after the magnitude 6.9 earthquake, and held a formal commemoration at 5:04 pm, the exact moment that the earthquake struck. It killed 67 people, including several in San Francisco, injured thousands, and caused more than $5 billion of damage around the Bay Area. Since the Loma Prieta Earthquake, San Francisco has invested $20 billion to seismically strengthen critical lifelines, facilities, and emergency resources. In addition to the ceremony, City departments and partners presented a COMMUNITY PREPAREDNESS FAIR with emergency preparedness training, a display of first responder apparatuses, and an earthquake simulator. THE GREATEST SHOWQUEEN was a very special program of Tom Orr singing his hilarious parodies at Martuni’s, accompanied by pianist Russell Deason, and so fitting to do the new show on October 13, the anniversary of being sainted by the Russian River Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence! He told his story— both good and bad, happy and sad, but always entertaining, including the props and costume changes. Bless you, Saint Orrcopalypse, and long may you live to inspire us!

Sister Dana sez, “Mitch McConnell, Trump’s most powerful ally, has been running campaign ads on Facebook pledging to block any impeachment attempt for as long as he remains in charge of the Senate. We know Moscow Mitch will rig any impeachment trial in Trump’s favor, so let’s make sure he can’t rig his own election next year!” How could I possibly resist the “PAPASAN AND PATRIK: Together again and it feels StO-li good!” event?! Well, here’s how I was invited to the party: “Many years ago, two friends were torn apart by an evil sorcerer who cast a powerful (and completely not-fabulous) separation spell in the kingdom of Stoli. Yet resilience and valor to find a way out of the darkness remained, and today at last the curse has been reversed; all the Lords and Ladies of the Castro may rejoice!” Well of course Sister Dana just HAD to attend and—as one of their most loyal friends—help celebrate the reunion of YOUNG’S MARKET COMPANY (Michael “Papasan” Daniels) and STOLI vodka (Patrik Gallineaux, National LGBT Manager/Global Ambassador) in the high castle of The Lookout in the Castro. Patrik and Michael have been longtime providers at many an LGBTQ fundraiser that I have attended. THE RICHMOND/ERMET AID FOUNDATION held a fun fundraiser, TRICKS & TREATS, a Halloween Party at the Edge in the Castro, on October 22 with GoGo Boys in costume, raffle prizes, Jello shots, and a special show by Empress Mercedez Munro as well as fabulous performances by members of the House of Munro. And what a treat to see REAF Executive Director Ken Henderson as Batman! I went as a gay recruiter nun.

The 35TH ANNUAL SAN FRANCISCO BAY AREA HRC GALA DINNER & AUCTION was held on October 19 at Hyatt Regency San Francisco. It was a time to celebrate our victories and double-down on our work to advance equality here locally, and to protect the gains that we’ve made BREAST CANCER EMERGENCY nationally. Producer, actor and “Try FUND held their 15th annual fundGuys” member Eugene Lee Yang raiser, THIS OLD BAG: the Power was the recipient of the HRC Visibility of the Purse, on October 25 at the Award. Yang came out earlier this year Fairmont. Every bag sold gave life and in a powerful video, “I’m Gay - Eugene spirit-saving financial assistance to lowLee Yang,” which he wrote, directed, income people battling breast cancer. and choreographed. Alongside Yang, Emcee and auctioneer was my good HRC honored LEVI STRAUSS & friend Liam Mayclem. I had my CO. with the Corporate Award and eye on a red Georgio Armani fanny John Lake, Vice President, Multiculpack, but it got swept away. Many cartural Strategy and LGBTQ Segment ing people snapped up designer bags. leader for WELLS FARGO, with the BTW please don’t call this old nun “this Charles M. Holmes Community Serold bag.” Thankew. vice Award. In addition to the honor(continued on page 26) ees, this was HRC President Alphonso David’s first appearance at the San Francisco Bay Area Gala. We learned how to further mobilize in our fight for equality. David noted that as one of the largest civil rights organizations working to achieve equality for LGBTQ Americans, the Human Rights Campaign represents a force of more than 3 million members and supporters nationwide—all committed to making HRC’s vision a reality, a world where queer people are embraced as full members of society at home, at work, and Dennis McMillan (aka Sister Dana) with Don Grant at the recent in every community. For live Horizons Foundation Gala held at the Fairmont San Francisco entertainment, TV’s American on Saturday, October 5. 20

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PHOTO BY PAUL MARGOLIS

By Sister Dana Van Iquity

OURTOWNSF NONPROFIT EXPO 2019 took place noon to 4 pm on October 19 at Eureka Valley Rec Center. This was the largest LGBTQ resource fair ever in EssEff with over 175 groups serving our community participating. It was the 4th annual resource fair of arts, community, fundraising, health, legal, political, recovery, service & spiritual groups for a day of fun and community building in the Castro. https://www.facebook.com/ourtownsf/

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LGBTQ News & Calendar for the Bay Area CELEBRATING FOUR DECADES (1978–2019)

San Francisco Transgender Film Festival Features Brave Filmmaking and Imagination Film fans rejoice: the San Francisco Transgender Film Festival (SFTFF) returns to the historic Roxie Theater November 7–10 with an expanded festival. This year’s festival includes 2 programs with ASL interpretation and closed captions for Deaf and hard-of-hearing audiences. Founded in 1997 as the world’s first transgender film festival, SFTFF continues to lead the pack when it comes to innovation, risk-taking, and imagination. “Our goal has never been to become a giant, glossy festival; we don’t aspire to join corporate Hollywood,” explains SFTFF Artistic Director Shawna Virago. “In fact, it’s quite the opposite. We’re proud of the complex, intersectional trans and gender-nonconforming lives, histories, and communities we showcase.” Virago continues, “We reject corporate assimilation; instead, we joyfully embrace under-represented voices, DIY-aesthetics, and are proud to present truly brave filmmaking, super-queer quirkiness, and wild imagination.” Festival Director Eric Garcia agrees: “This year’s filmmakers are incredibly brave—and inspiringly innovative. One of the many beautiful things about SFTFF is that we center films and stories that more mainstream LGBT festivals shy away from.” This year’s festival features 6 different programs—all at The Roxie Theater—that illustrate trans and gender-non-conforming communities’ magic, street smarts, sass, resilience, sexuality, community organizing, friendship, and courage. From falling in love to building a movement, from animation to hard-hitting documentaries, the 2019 SFTFF has something for everyone. Unlike most other festivals, SFTFF prioritizes and presents films that are made by trans and gender-nonconforming directors and filmmakers. “It is profoundly important that trans people tell our own stories, instead of cisgender people telling our stories for us—and getting it wrong,” explains Virago, “In an era when so many cisgender people are getting funding to making films about trans people, and when so many cisgender actors are ‘playing trans’—a dangerous and

Honor Black Trans Womxn! – Screens Sunday, Nov. 10, at 6pm

KIT’N KITTY’S

QUEER POP QUIZ

Transfinite – Screens Thursday, Nov. 7, at 7pm – ASL Interpreted

harmful practice—SFTFF continues to celebrate work by and from trans communities.” StormMiguel Florez, SFTFF’s Access Coordinator says, “We’re really in love with this year’s films: they’re visually stunning, emotionally powerful, and there’s a great balance of humor, heartbreak, and inspiration.”

Across, Beyond and Over – Screens Saturday, Nov. 9, at 9pm

SFTFF 2019 HIGHLIGHTS This year’s Opening Night Film is TRANSFINITE (Thursday, November 7 @ 7 pm – ASL Interpreted). Making its highlyanticipated Bay Area premiere, this sci-fi omnibus feature film is composed of seven standalone magical short stories where supernatural trans and queer people from various cultures use their powers to protect, love, teach, fight, and thrive. Directed by Neelu Bhuman. I-57 (Saturday, November 9 @ 7 pm) - A mother tries to support her son and his gender identity by inviting a stranger to dinner. Featuring Pasean Wilson (F Word Documentary, Gotham, Striptease) and Cess Jones (Orange Is the New Black). Directed by Livia Huang. Carving Space - Screens Sunday, Nov. 10, at 6pm

To Be With You (Saturday, November 9 @ 9 pm) - Alex is in Los Angeles for 24 hours to reclaim their father’s ashes. Along the way, Alex finds an old love, a beauty in the city, and a final connection to the past. Directed by Elliott Feliciano. This Is For Us (Saturday, November 9 @ 9 pm) - A choreographed visual film of resilience that centers Black Queer Femme radical joy and intimacy between friends. The film expresses cultivated magic and healing through tea, glitter, whiskey, and a good belly laugh. “Come celebrate with me that every day something has tried to kill me and has failed.” Directed by Shanel Edwards. Tender (Sunday, November 10 @ 4pm) - Tender tells the story of three black trans women, their inextricable connections to San Francisco’s Tenderloin neighborhood, and the tensions caused by San Francisco’s gentrification and housing crisis. Directed by Daryl B. Jones. RUN! (Sunday, November 10 @ 6 pm) - is a mythography of nuclear technology, pesticides, and the question of transgender people fighting in the U.S. military. Filmed at the Trinity Site where the first atomic bomb was detonated, along the edges of the Los Alamos

Feeling Like An Orchid – Screens Saturday, Nov. 9, at 7pm

National Laboratory, and at the abandoned Black Hole Museum of Nuclear Waste. Directed Malic Amalya. The 2019 San Francisco Transgender Film Festival runs Thursday through Sunday November 7–10. Program details and tickets are available at: http://sftff.org/ Thursday, November 7 @ Roxie Theater: 7 pm Opening Night - ASL Interpreted Friday, November 8 @ Roxie Theater 8 pm - ASL Interpreted Saturday, November 9 @ Roxie Theater: 7 pm Saturday, November 9 @ Roxie Theater: 9 pm Sunday, November 10 @ Roxie Theater: 4 pm Sunday, November 10 @ Roxie Theater: 6 pm WHERE: Roxie Theater: (3117 16th Street @ Valencia, San Francisco) TICKETS: $12–15 sliding scale INFO: http://sftff.org/

WE NEED A HERO San Franciscan Mark Bingham helped to thwart United Airlines Flight 93’s hijackers so that the plane crashed here: A) PA B) CA C) GA D) WA ANSWER ON PAGE 26

Karin Jaffie, aka Kit/Kitty Tapata, won the title of Mr. Gay San Francisco in 2011 and has earned many other honors since. Connect with Jaffie via Facebook at: https://www.facebook.com/pg/ktapata

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Vestvali the Magnificent

Photos Courtesy of Dr. Bill Lipsky

and many a husband had reason to be jealous of the beautiful, chivalrous Romeo.”

Faces from Our LGBT Past Dr. Bill Lipsky Not for nothing was prima donna assoluta and acclaimed actress Felicità von Vestvali known as the Magnificent. Born in Poland and trained for the opera in Italy, she achieved her greatest celebrity playing men—Figaro, Petruchio, Orpheus—including two of the most famous dramatis personae in English literature: Romeo and Hamlet. Critics were divided about her abilities, but the public adored her, filling halls and theaters in Europe and the Americas for performance after performance.

Vestvali was also a particular favorite of President Abraham Lincoln, who attended four of her appearances in Washington, D.C., in early 1864. The Evening Star reported that for her opening night performance of Gamea or, the Jewish Mother on January 25, the theater was “overflowingly filled.” Vestvali, the paper proclaimed, was “as usual, magnificent and brilliant.” Mary Lincoln, deeply moved by the production, persuaded her husband to attend a second presentation of the play on January 28. They returned to the theater the next night for Vestvali’s performance as the dual characters of Allessandro Massaroni and the Count de Strozzi in The Brigand, a musical drama. Five nights later, the President saw her as Captain Henri de Lagardere in The Duke’s Motto. As imposing as Vestvali was in these roles, she could be just as formidable off-stage. On March 23, 1864, waiting for her entrance during the third act of The Duke’s Motto at the Brooklyn Opera House, two merchants, admitted backstage, stopped her in the wings. One of them, “affecting to admire her appearance in men’s clothes, laid his hand upon her person.” Then, according to the Daily National Republican, he “called her a ‘bully boy.’”

The secret of her success? Contemporaries noted her great talent, her commanding presence, “her statuesque physique and radiant beauty.” Those were important, of course, but Rosa von Braunschweig, Vestvali consida longtime ered his words friend, wrote “an ungentlein the Yearbook of manly, if not Intermediate Sexual absolutely vulgar, Types (1903) that “it was expression.” Drawing mostly due to her Uranian the sword she was wearFelicità von Vestvali nature that she knew how ing for her role, the indigto overcome all obstacles nant diva attacked him, cutting with masculine energy and that her him severely before he fled. Next boundless striving allowed her to she turned on his companion, but achieve the goal to which her genius unwilling to share the same fate, “he had predestined her.” skedaddled.” She “then resumed her She was born Anna Marie Staegemann in Stettin in 1829 or Warsaw in 1831. In childhood she wanted to be a priest, but eventually a life in the theater became her singular desire. With her family opposed, she ran away wearing boy’s clothes, finding work as a singer with a traveling company. Eventually she made her way to Leipzig, where she joined the local opera society, appearing in Norma, The Daughter of the Regiment and as Agathe in Der Freischütz. Regional success was not enough for her. She enrolled in the Paris Conservatory, where she received “thorough voice training” and where “a friend enlightened her about her Uranian inclination.” From then on, wrote Braunschweig, “her lively nature craved the joy of love,” although she “considered love merely a flower which decorated her life’s path.” Further training followed in Italy. In 1853 she debuted at Milan’s La Scala as d’Azucena in Trovatore, winning “a threefold triumph as woman, as actress, and as singer.” Vestvali was immediately invited to London, where, informed The Musical World, she “created an immense sensation, was vociferously applauded in everything, and absolutely pelted with bouquets of all shades and colors, flowers, herbs, and shrubs.” From London she went on to triumph in Paris, so captivating Emperor Napoleon III that he presented her with a solid silver suit of armor for her performance as Romeo in Bellini’s Romeo and Juliet. He was not alone. During her twoyear stay in the city, “many beautiful women competed for Vestvali’s favor 22

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duties before the footlights.” Such was her fame that newspapers everywhere reported the incident. Vestvali made her San Francisco debut on September 11, 1865. The Daily Alta California was ecstatic, writing that with her performance in Gamea, “Mlle Vestvali achieved the greatest lyric triumph known to California, and proved to an appreciative audience that she had fully earned the title of ‘magnificent,’ for this is the only word that can fully convey the idea of her acting and singing.” Thomas Maguire, impresario of the city’s Opera House, had promised to pay her for 100 performances across

Maguire’s Opera House, San Francisco

Vestvali in San Francisco September 1865

130 days. When he did not, she sued him for $30,000. A war of words began. He called her a “hussy,” she claimed, a “damned fiend under the mask of a woman,” and threatened her with physical harm. Eventually all charges were dismissed. According to Braunschweig, “from this time also dates her friendship with a Miss E. L., a German actress” who became her principle heir. There were other romances as well, including Jessie MacLean, a New York actress. Using coded language, the Daily Alta told its readers in 1880, the year she died, that “Vestvali took a fancy to her and carried her off to Europe [for] several years of wild adventure.” Many of her intimacies endured. During her last illness, she was “nursed by a Miss G,” her last love, as well as Miss E. L., “who came to nurse her also.” Although Vestvali “never emphasized her Uranian nature,” wrote Braunschweig, who also remained a dear friend, she “belonged to those exceptional beings in art as well as in life whose uniqueness can be understood only by those who understand homosexuality.” Bill Lipsky, Ph.D., author of “Gay and Lesbian San Francisco” (2006), is a member of the Rainbow Honor Walk board of directors.

Felicità von Vestvali as Hamlet (top left), as Romeo (top right), as Orpheus (bottom left), and Vestvali circa 1873 (bottom right)

Ozon’s New Film Tackles the Church Abuse Scandal in France

Film Gary M. Kramer By the Grace of God, opening November 1 in the Bay Area, is out gay director François Ozon’s riveting drama about the church’s recent child abuse scandal in Lyon. The film chronicles the efforts of several victims of pedophile priest Bernard Preynat (Bernard Verley) to bring the situation to light François Ozon and to demand accountability from the Catholic church. Several stories unfold, starting with Alexandre (Melvin Poupaud), who takes a respectful approach to confronting the church and its hierarchy. He eventually files a complaint that sets a chain of events and disclosures in motion. François (Denis Ménochet) is one victim who goes to the media to inform the public and forms an association for other sufferers. One of the most moving stories is Emmanuel’s (Swann Arlaud), a young man who is still haunted by what happened to him as a child. The ripples that the abuse have on the men, their families, and loved ones are artfully handled as the victims seek justice, not revenge, and hope to change the statute of limitations about such cases as men are encouraged—and find the courage—to speak out. This is an absorbing film made with considerable empathy and righteous anger. Ozon’s concerned approach never allows By the Grace of God to become too melodramatic or histrionic. The director recently chatted with me for the San Francisco Bay Times about his outstanding film. Gary M. Kramer: What prompted you to tackle this subject in a film, and why now? François Ozon: I had never had the subject of pedophilia in mind. I have made many films about strong

women, so I wanted to make a film about strong men. I was looking for a subject and I discovered these testimonies of abused children. I was moved. When I met the victims, they told me their story, and I decided to make a film.

tims spoke for the first time. When you are abused, you think you are alone, and when you share your suffering and fight together, you realize you are not alone. In the film, Emmanuel is reborn. This [activism] helps him survive.

Gary M. Kramer: It is very difficult for people who have been abused to share stories of their abuse. It’s more than just shame; it’s a loss of trust and faith. It’s about feeling weak and vulnerable. What are your observations on the impact of this?

Gary M. Kramer: Please share more about how your film was received in France and by the church.

François Ozon: When I met the victims, it was moving to hear the survivors telling me the intimate stories of their families when they decided to speak out. I saw that an abused child is a ticking time bomb. Their [trauma] affects everyone in the family. The parents, the brothers, and sisters, and even their children feel guilty. The film is about the repercussions of abuse for all members of the family. Gary M. Kramer: You tell the story, first through letters, then through actions, documenting how the cases each unfolded. Can you discuss your approach to the sensitive material? François Ozon: The approach was suitable for each character. Alexandre was sober and very polite. François is looking to fight, and Emmanuel is suffering. The mise-enscène is close to the soul of each character. I wanted to be with each man and share his emotion. When I introduce a new character, I give audiences two minutes with him to create an emotional link. Gary M. Kramer: By the Grace of God encourages victims to speak out. Can you talk about that? François Ozon: I hope it does. In France, the film was successful and had a big influence. People came out and spoke out. I know some new vic-

François Ozon: The church was afraid before the release, but when they saw the film, they were nice to me because they understand I respected the faith. I was earnest. There was nothing new; there were always items about [the scandal] in the paper. The film shows the point of view of the victims and the [church] discovered how much these men suffered. In the end, the film was supported by the Catholic community; they came to see it. Many Catholics are upset by the situation, and they thanked me. They want things to change. Gary M. Kramer: What has changed? François Ozon: Many things. After the release of the film, [Cardinal] Barbarin was condemned, and the priest [Preynat] was defrocked. People realize how much pedophilia can be a crime. Change is slow, but it is happening. Gary M. Kramer: Do you think it’s possible for victims to find closure or healing? François Ozon: It takes time. It’s a long fight but some are able. It depends on social background. For some, it destroys them for their entire life, and some victims commit suicide. © 2019 Gary M. Kramer Gary M. Kramer is the author of “Independent Queer Cinema: Reviews and Interviews,” and the co-editor of “Directory of World Cinema: Argentina.” Follow him on Twitter @garymkramer

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Canela Bistro 8th Anniversary Photos by Audrey McCann Photography A standing room only crowd celebrated Canela Bistro’s 8th Anniversary on Saturday, September 19, at the popular Castro restaurant. The gourmet menu of Spanish tapas developed over the past eight “delicious years” was enjoyed by the attending friends and devotees who also appreciated live music and free-flowing beverages. District 8 Supervisor Rafael Mandelman was on hand to represent the City of San Francisco and to congratulate Chef Mat Schuster and his partner Francisco Cifuentes on the realization of their dream of creating a neighborhood restaurant that would be a local destination featuring the culinary tastes of Spain. http://www.canelasf.com

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Dining with Dogs

LGBTQ News & Calendar for the Bay Area

CELEBRATING FOUR DECADES (1978–2019)

Gaston: Next up, who doesn’t love a burger and BBQ—all at outdoor picnic tables? When you dine at 4505 Burgers and BBQ on Divisadero, hope that a big chunk of that juicy hamburger flies out of Dad’s hands onto the ground. There’s even a #4505patiopups hashtag on Instagram. Alphonse: Woof! Gaston: Since we both have French names, we’re always partial to French cafes, and what better place to enjoy la dolce vita than Bistro Central Parc in NOPA? It’s on Central Street and less of a scene than Divisadero Street. When those crispy fries come bouncing our way, we’re in dog heaven. Alphonse: Oui!

The Gay Gourmet David Landis This week’s column is guest written by Gaston and Alphonse, The Gay Gourmet’s adorable pound pups. Gaston: Why is it when Dad goes out to eat, we just have to sit there quietly? We’re hungry too, for gosh sakes. Well, we’ll show them. We’ve put together some of the best places in San Francisco where when food falls to the floor, dogs win. Alphonse: Woof!

Gaston: There’s something for everyone at Off the Grid, the big food truck extravaganza outdoors at the Main Parade Ground in the Presidio. Culinary offerings range from Argentinian to Indian to Mexican to Filipino and more. Since many folks eat standing up, it means better eats for the dogs. And best of all, after our tasty lunch, Dad takes us across the way to Crissy Field, where dogs can run leash-free on the beach. Check the website, as hours and locations vary due to the seasons. Alphonse: Woof! Gaston: For something elegant, there’s nothing quite like Le Colonial on Cosmo Alley (off Union Square), which is celebrating 21 years in business. This institution has an iconic standing in San Francisco’s dining history. It used to be the home of Trader Vic’s, where the “see and be seen” crowd gathered to imbibe. There’s a beautiful covered patio where dogs are welcome. We love the fusion of French and Vietnamese cooking. Dad always orders their Mai Tai, which is good for us because then the crispy rolls (Cha Gio Tom Cua) tend to easily slip out of Dad’s hands to the floor. Alphonse: Dung! (That’s “yes” in Vietnamese.) Gaston: We haven’t been there yet, but we’re hearing good things about the Berkeley Boathouse at the Berkeley Marina. You can dock your boat and then dine at this waterfront eatery. The burrata plate with fried basil pesto and marinated heirloom tomato balsamic glaze sounds right up our canine alley. Dogs can dine with their human companions on the deck/patio—or even hang in the courtyard where there are bocce ball courts and fire pits. Alphonse: Woof! Gaston: For dining with a view, there’s nothing like Mission Rock Resort, just a couple of blocks from the new Chase Center. You have unobstructed views of the Bay from the second floor balcony dining area; even dogs have a view! We love the Dungeness crab that sometimes drops unknowingly into our mouths. Alphonse: Woof! Gaston: For an upscale seafood experience with a view of the Bay Bridge, book an outdoor table at Waterbar. Dad loves their oysters; I’m not convinced they’re a doggie culinary delight. But we love the fritto misto with bay shrimp. Yum! And afterwards, it’s always fun to walk along the Embarcadero with the great smells from the Bay. Alphonse: Double Woof! Gaston: For a great casual weekend brunch, there’s nothing quite like the tropical ambiance of the Palm House on Union Street. They always bring bowls of water for the pups on the patio and Dad thinks it’s like a trip to Hawaii or the Caribbean. We like the sweet potato fries that magically fall from the sky. Alphonse: Woof! Gaston: If you’re in the Castro (one of our fave neighborhoods), the place to see and be seen is the back courtyard at Starbelly. Dad likes the wines by the glass, but we vote for the house-made chicken liver pate. What’s not to like about meat?

Gaston: First up—Mer Sea, a casual café/restaurant in reused containers with outdoor seating on Treasure Island. It boasts a one-of-a-kind view of the city’s skyline, and a great path for dog-walking postnoshing. My favorite fall-tothe-ground snack? Crispy tacos with chicken at their popular weekend brunch. Go early. Alphonse: Woof!

Alphonse: Woof! Gaston: Homemade dog milk bones and the breakfast pizzas reign supreme at Rose’s Café on Union Street in Cow Hollow. We like the Steiner Street side patio because it’s more private and quiet—and you can score big with non dogowners who drop food willy nilly. Alphonse: Woof! Gaston: If you’re in North Beach, it’s too bad that dog-friendly Washington Square is closed for the foreseeable future due to renovations. But Original Joe’s, a great Italian-American throwback to the 50s, is still a classic. Grab one of the outdoor patio tables either on Union or Stockton and while away the day. Dad likes the classics here: spaghetti with meatballs, a glass of Chianti, and zabaglione. The portions are huge, which means more for dogs, yay! Alphonse: Woof! (continued on page 30)

Dog Day on the Bay Hosted by Hornblower Cruises & Events on November 3 Partnering with Petco; Portion of the proceeds benefiting Friends of Oakland Animal Services Hornblower Cruises & Events, the charter yacht and dining cruise company, has announced Dog Day on the Bay sponsored by Petco that will take place on Sunday, November 3, with em”bark”ation at Pier 3 in San Francisco beginning at 3 pm with a cruising time of 3:30 pm. The “Pet Cruise Director” will be dog-training expert Darris Cooper. A portion of the proceeds will benefit local nonprofit Friends of Oakland Animal Services and a donation drive on their behalf will be hosted with adult-sized bath towels, fleece throw blankets, Kong rubber toys, and treats for dogs or cats being sought. Pier 3 is located on the Embarcadero, north of the Ferry Building and close to the Embarcadero BART station and the Muni F line, making this two-hour cruise an accessible option for a weekend excursion with a favorite furry friend. Human guests can enter their companion in costume and trick contests to show off their dog’s favorite moves or their cutest outfit while the four-footed set can peruse the doggie treat buffet sponsored by Petco and then visit the “relief” area on the Sun deck. Tickets are available to purchase: https://www.hornblower.com/san-francisco/dog-day-on-the-bay-petco/ or from the reservation call center at 415-788-8866. Dogs cruise for free. The cruise tours the San Francisco Bay with views of some of San Francisco’s top sights. Highlights include traveling under the Golden Gate and Bay Bridges and around Alcatraz Island. Snacks prepared on board by Hornblower’s chefs plus libations from a full bar will be available for purchase while cruising. There will also be musical entertainment from a local DJ. S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES

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LEWIS & GAFFNEY (continued from page 4)

ROSTOW (continued from page 3)

they had the power to do so would result in Republicans doing the same and further undermine the “credibility” of the Court.

humiliating scandal for a bi female. Sorry, Katie.

In an attempt to appear assertive, Biden promised that if next year one of the justices left the Court as happened during the 2016 election year, “I would make sure that we would do exactly what McConnell did last time out. We would not allow any hearing to be held for a new justice.” But how could Biden possibly ensure that McConnell and the Republican majority in the Senate would not get such a justice confirmed as they did with Gorsuch and Kavanaugh? Biden presently holds no political office, and if he could stop McConnell, why didn’t he do so back in 2016 when he was Vice President and thus the titular “president of the Senate”? Taking a long-term view of the possible ramifications of changing the structure of the Supreme Court is a legitimate and perhaps persuasive argument. The Court has had nine Justices for the last 150 years, although the number of Justices before that varied from 6 to 10. But the argument fails to respond to the

immediate threat to the well being of millions of Americans, including LGBTIQ people, that the current Supreme Court poses and the nakedly partisan strategy that the Republicans have pursued over the past 50 years to shape the ideological stance of the Court. None of the other eight candidates on stage interrupted to assert their position on the question. In addition, Harris, Klobuchar, Booker. and Gabbard all chose not to advocate reforming the Court when asked what they would do if recent state laws severely restricting abortion were upheld in the courts. Stay tuned. We will continue to report on this critical issue as the campaign unfolds. John Lewis and Stuart Gaffney, together for over three decades, were plaintiffs in the California case for equal marriage rights decided by the California Supreme Court in 2008. Their leadership in the grassroots organization Marriage Equality USA contributed in 2015 to making same-sex marriage legal nationwide.

CHEN (continued from page 8) Gershow shared these final thoughts: “It is my hope that the younger and new players we mentor in our league today would become the mentors and leaders of tomorrow. It’s the quality of women we have that makes our league strong, fun, and positive. I want to thank all the team managers for their dedication in leading the success and the future of our league.” For more information on the Alameda Women’s Softball League, please visit their Facebook page ( https://www.facebook.com/awsl2016/ ) or contact Recreation and Parks, City of Alameda: https://bit.ly/369W1bn John Chen, a UCLA alumnus and an avid sports fan, has competed as well as coached tennis, volleyball, softball and football teams.

ADELMAN (continued from page 12) on housing and sexual orientation and gender identity discrimination supports these concerns. So even though a San Francisco ordinance, The LGBTQ Long Term Care Facility Bill of Rights (which was passed in March of 2015), made it illegal to discriminate in long-term senior care facilities on the basis of sexual orientation, gender identity, and HIV status, compliance has been less than optimal. To facilitate compliance, just this October, the Department of Aging in partnership with Openhouse (an LGBTQ serving nonprofit) rolled out a handbook to help long-term senior care facilities comply with the legislation. The handbook is a clear and simple guide on how to implement the ordinance and how to make LGBTQ older adults and people with disabilities feel comfortable and respected. While this handbook is a much-welcomed tool to create more LGBTQ affirming senior housing and senior care facilities, the fact is that LGBTQ seniors have too few housing options. Prop A will help to build much-needed LGBTQ welcoming senior housing. But you have to vote yes on Prop A to ensure it passes. Vote YES on Prop A. Dr. Marcy Adelman, Co-Founder of the nonprofit Openhouse, oversees the Aging in Community column. She is a psychologist and LGBTQI longevity advocate and policy advisor. She serves on the Governor’s Alzheimer’s Prevention and Preparedness Task Force, California Commission on Aging, the Board of the Alzheimer’s Association of Northern California and Northern Nevada, and the San Francisco Dignity Fund Oversight and Advisory Committee.

KIT’N KITTY’S

QUEER POP QUIZ ANSWER (Question on pg 21) A) PA

Bingham, along with other passengers, formed a plan to retake the plane from the hijackers, and led the effort that resulted in the crash of the plane into a field near Shanksville, Pennsylvania, thwarting the hijackers’ plan to crash the plane into a building in Washington, D.C., most likely either the U.S. Capitol Building or the White House.

That said, why does anyone allow another person to take “intimate” photos to begin with? What’s the point of them? To relive the magic moment when you’re alone? To share the happy memories together down the road? To save money on porn purchases by creating your own personal anthology? I mean seriously. Why? I guess in this case we had a third party behind the camera, which makes more sense logistically, but again. To what end? Frankly, I’m not a big fan of memorializing every precious detail of one’s life to begin with. I suppose it’s a generational thing, but I prefer to keep my recollections in my own head and bring them out when appropriate so my friends can benefit from my exaggerated version of events. Back in the day, a camera shot was planned to the extent that you could smile or toss your hair before the moment froze for posterity. And then when the film came back you might have had a chance to grab unflattering images and destroy them before they found their way into some scrapbook. I still have not forgiven a certain family member for Facebook-tagging a shot of me asleep on the couch looking like a beached whale, which was then remarked upon by dozens of high school friends whom I hadn’t seen in decades. (It had an adorable child in the picture, and the family member in question mistakenly thought the tableau was cute. It was not.) Ah, Pamela Enough of that subject. I just read a touching article in The New York Times about a well-known Harvard Law Professor with Alzheimer’s named Charles Ogletree and his wife of many years, Pamela. Why did I read this article, you ask? Well, do you remember that Trump had a rally in Minneapolis a few weeks back? I guess some activists

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“The Saloon has lost my business.” This Pamela Ogletree is a little old lady with gray hair who hails from Olivia, Minnesota, population 2,500. Among the responses to her huffy announcement was the terse reply: “It’s a gay bar, Pamela.” That became a meme, and now you can even buy yourself a t-shirt adorned with the phrase. I’m sorry, but you can just imagine Pamela Ogletree of Olivia, Minnesota, pursing her lips as she scrolls through a feed on the giant PC monitor that her grandson Bryan set up in her kitchen last year. Pamela frowns as she reads about the Trump baby blimp. How disrespectful to our president! That “Saloon” place is never getting a dime from me! Dollars and cents. Now that’s something they can understand. I might even let them know. Give them something to think about. She harrumphs under her breath and types out her comment. At any rate, I was looking for more information about “It’s a gay bar, Pamela” when I found several other nice-sounding Pamela Ogletrees, including the Harvard Pamela. Sad story. Here Comes the Judge Speaking of parents, I would imagine you could sell a made-for-TV movie based on the case of the seven-year-old child of Anne Georgulas and Jeffrey Younger, whose marriage was annulled after four years in 2016. The couple had twins, and one of the twins identifies as a transgirl, Luna, with her mother and a boy, James, with his father. Their custody battle seemed resolved when an 11–1 jury sided with the mother on October 22. Two days later, a judge in charge

of reviewing the decision decided that both parents should share custody and hash out the child’s future between them. Oh, thanks for that, your honor. Very helpful. I know I’m biased, but from what I’ve read, Georgulas, who is a pediatrician, is not deliberately trying to force her son to become a girl. No one does that. Younger, on the other hand, seems clearly driven to make sure James outgrows this silly transgender nonsense. His claim that James loves being a boy when he’s with Dad makes perfect sense as well. What seven-year-old from a broken home wouldn’t try to please both parents? Indeed, when interviewed without parents, Luna told a social worker that she would like to be a girl and that Dad forces her into boy’s clothes. Texas officials have gone nuts over this story, insisting that no child that age should be forced into a life altering gender change. But of course no one is suggesting that Luna take hormones or undergo any medical treatment, only that the kid be allowed to grow up in a welcoming atmosphere and explore gender roles in age appropriate ways. Lord knows what will happen now that the lengthy custody fight has ended in a draw. By the way, do you remember the bizarre case of the Minnesota woman who sued her estranged trans-daughter, along with several institutions, after the girl transitioned without Mom’s permission? The girl managed to emancipate herself at age 15, in a process that was respected by her school and the county health services. Her mother launched legal action, but lost her case in federal court and again before the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Eighth Circuit. The mother, Anmarie Calgaro, petitioned the Supreme Court to review the situation, but happily, the Court rejected the case the other day. Calgaro’s daughter is now over 18, so the case is moot. arostow@aol.com

SISTER DANA (continued from page 20) THE SISTERS OF PERPETUAL INDULGENCE threw a sensational SAINTS & SPINNERS HALLOWEEN PARTY on October 26 at Spin. We nuns had a funfilled, spooky night of dancing with DJ Juanita MORE! spinning for us, amazing pop-up drag performances by Alex U. Inn, Mutha Chucka, Tara Dactyl, Honey Mahogany, Bella Donna Summer, & Roxy-Cotten Candy, unlimited ping pong, and FUNdraising. I was delighted to co-judge the costume contest with Sister Roma. The winner was the witty woman in a huge peach costume with a sign: “IM-PEACH!” Sister Dana sez, “Make a note. Plan to vote. Queer the Vote on November 5th!” A federal judge has struck down parts of a federal law that protects transgender patients. Judge Reed O’Connor in the Northern District of Texas ruled on October 15 that protections for transgender patients in the Affordable Care Act (ObamaCare) violate the religious freedom of health care providers. Unconscionable! Sister Dana sez, “Let’s talk turkey: there are a lot of great events coming up way before Thanksgiving.” For the month of November, STRUT, 470 Castro Street, is exhibiting the paintings of Serge Gay,

managed to obtain one of the Tump baby blimps for the occasion, and they set it up to drift over the roof of The Saloon bar. The story got onto social media, where another Pamela Ogletree remarked in the comment section:

Jr., an incredibly talented artist. He is a Grammy nominated Creative Director and Art Director. Also a Painter, Illustrator, Graphic Designer, currently based out of San Francisco. His art infuses inspiration from living in cities from coast to coast. Influence in his work can be found from the culture sociology of his homeland of Haiti, New York, Miami, Detroit, and EssEff. “My work shows layers and strokes to predict what a person, place, or thing should look like from the creator’s mind to reality,” he says. http://sergegayjr.com/index.html The next CASTRO ART WALK is November 7, 6 pm–9 pm. As always, it is free to the public and is a reception by 14 venues in the Castro. Venues are: Apothecarium, 2029 Market Street; Art Attack SF, 2358 Market Street; Blackbird, 2124 Market Street; Blush! Wine Bar, 476 Castro Street; Dog Eared Books, 489 Castro Street; Flore, 2298 Market Street; Local Take, 3979 17th Street; Norden Living, 3618 17th Street, Ruby’s Clay Studio & Gallery, 552A Noe Street; Spark Arts, 4229 18th Street; The Artist’s Gallery, 4406 18th Street; The Detour, 2200 Market Street; and TIN Rx Castro, 2175 Market Street. LIVING ANGELS is a group art show curated by Thomasina DeMaio depicting caretakers in our community. They were on the front lines during the 1980s until now taking care of people and their needs.

Entertainment with Tango dancing, music and art. An artful evening. Join them to celebrate some caring people. Eureka Valley Recreation Center, 100 Collingwood Street, November 9, 5:30 pm–9 pm. shorturl.at/qDQY6 THE SAN FRANCISCO TRANSGENDER FILM FESTIVAL will present a stellar collection of transgender films from around the globe. This year’s festival takes place at The Roxie Theater, 3177 16th Street, November 7 at 7 pm–November 10 at 8 pm. shorturl.at/dprV9 BAY AREA MUSICAL’s production of GYPSY runs at Alcazar Theatre, 650 Geary Street, November 9–December 8. I will give my review in the next column, but I just know us theater fags will be totally queer for this! “Everything’s coming up Roses!” SOIRÉE ON THE BAY II is an annual festive fundraiser for THE RICHMOND/ERMET AID FOUNDATION (REAF) on Wednesday, November 13, 5:30 pm to 8:30 pm, on the docked “Celebrity Eclipse,” Pier 27. https://www.reaf-sf.org/ Sister Dana sez, “Have you ever in your life heard the phrase ‘QUID PRO QUO’ used so so sooo many times, day after day after day?! Ugh.”

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BAY TIMES S

LGBTQ News & Calendar for the Bay Area CELEBRATING FOUR DECADES (1978–2019)

COMING UP

CALENDAR OF UPCOMING EVENTS http://sfbaytimes.com/ Compiled by Blake Dillon

31 Thursday

benefit for REAF hosted by Mark Rhodes. 7pm. http://www.castrotheatre.com

Haunted Kiki Ball @ Strut, 470 Castro Street. The event includes multiple categories of costume competitions with prizes plus snacks and candy. 5-9pm. The Haunted Kiki Ball on Facebook

Madonna @ Golden Gate Theatre, 1 Taylor Street. Broadway SF welcomes the Madame X Tour for three nights through November 5. 10:30pm. https://bit.ly/2ppZJx5

Creatures of the NightLife LIVE @ California Academy of Sciences, Golden Gate Park, 55 Music Concourse Drive. For this evening - one in a popular ongoing series, with food and beverage options along with DJs, live music and dancing - you are invited to come in costume for the annual Halloween bash and drag show featuring Heklina and more. 6pm. http://www.calacademy.org

3 Sunday

HALLOWEEN

Rocky Horror Picture Show @ Victoria Theatre, 2961 16th Street. Ray of Light Theatre Company’s production of the cult classic is a Halloween season favorite. 8pm; runs through November 2. https://bit.ly/2NndYe0

NOVEMBER

1 Friday Ebabes TGIF with Ruby’s in Town @ The Terrace Room, Lake Merritt Hotel, 1800 Madison Street, Oakland. Join DB, Lynn, Jen and many others for this longstanding mixer for women. 6pm. Ebabes on Facebook Día de los Muertos @ The Grand, 520 4th Street, San Francisco. Hosted by Holy Cow Nightclub. Free admission before 11pm. https://bit.ly/2WrnJvJ Performance, Protest & Politics: The Art of Gilbert Baker @ GLBT History Museum, 4127 18th Street. The Opening Night of a new exhibit using textiles, costumes, photographs and ephemera based on the work of Gilbert Baker. 7-9pm. http://www.glbthistory.org Opening Night: The Apollo @ Castro Theatre, 429 Castro. Presented by SFFilm, this special event will include a musical introduction by Fantastic Negrito and appearances by the director and producer. The film about Harlem’s iconic Apollo Theater uses pivotal moments in black civic history with interviews and performances by a parade of riveting celebrities including Aretha Franklin, Patti LaBelle, Smokey Robinson and more. 5:30pm. http://www.castrotheatre.com

2 Saturday Emperors Night Out 2019 @ The Cafe, 2369 Market Street. Join The Brotherhood of Emperors San Francisco as they produce the annual Emperor’s Night Out event with the Reigning Emperor. 4-7pm. http://www.imperialcouncilsf.com Kathy Griffin’s A Hell of a Story @ Castro Theatre, 429 Castro. Following the screening of comedian Griffin’s new film, Kate Kendell will interview Griffin at this 28

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Creation Spirituality @ East County Shared Ministry, 200 E. Leland Road, Pittsburg. Rev. Will McGarvey continues the Creation Series with a celebration of All Saints Day. 10am. https://bit.ly/36l7GUL Swagger Like Us @ El Rio, 3158 Mission Street. An afternoon of booty dropping hip hop, cookout with DJs and live performances each first Sunday. 2-8pm. http://www.sfaf.org Unleash! Dance Party @ Ivy Room, 860 San Pablo Avenue, Berkeley. Join DJ Mysdefy and DJ Rockaway for this 1st Sunday dance party. 3:30pm. http://www.ivyroom.com Release Party for Nightmareland: Travels at the Borders of Sleep, Dreams and Wakefulness @ Dog Eared Books Castro, 489 Castro Street. Author Lex “Lonehood” Nover will read from and sign his new book exploring sleep disorders and unusual dream states. http://www.dogearedbooks.com

4 Monday Gallery of Illustrious Queers: Portraits by Jordan Reznick @ Hormel LGBTQIA Center, SF Main Library, 100 Larkin Street. Photographer Jordan Reznick and curator Margaret Tedesco’s exhibit exploring how trans people’s embodiments and life experiences build movement for transgender pride and liberation. Through January 16, 2020. http://www.sfpl.org Paint Nite: Sky Full of Blossoms @ Flore, 2298 Market. The event is one in an ongoing series on Mondays where you’ll be provided with paint, canvas, brushes, easels and a professional guide leading you in painting and you’ll take home your own masterpiece. 7-9pm. http://www.yaymaker.com

appearances by collaborators including Dollly Parton, Emmylou Harris, Bonnie Raitt and Jackson Browne. 7:00pm. Desolation Center follows at 8:50pm. http://www.castrotheatre.com STOMP @ A.C.T.’s Geary Theater, 415 Geary Street. The explosive Broadway show is an unforgettable experience for all ages. Check times for multiple shows through November 10. http://www.actsf.org

6 Wednesday Castro Farmers Market @ Noe Street, 16th and Market. Every Wednesday from March through November, the street next to Flore and Lookout is abloom with fresh fruits and vegetables, rain or shine. 5-8pm. http://www.pcfma.org Rental Housing Clinic @ SF LGBT Center, 1800 Market Street. Connect with housing counselors to get application assistance for City affordable rentals and ownership opportunities. 6-8pm. http://www.sfcenter.org

7 Thursday Dee’s Keys Piano Bar @ Beaux Castro Cocktail Lounge, 2344 Market Street. Join Dr. Dee Spencer for drinks, music and singalongs every Thursday for Happy Hour and there’s no cover. 4-8pm. http://www.beauxsf.com Castro Art Walk @ Multiple Castro businesses and Jane Warner Plaza. Merchants, artists and musicians present an evening of free fun on first Thursdays. 6-9pm. http://www.castroartwalk.com

8 Friday SEE NIGHT Benefit Concert for Planned Parenthood @ Manny’s, 3092 16th Street. The SF indie rock band will perform a string trio set. 8:30pm. http://www.wlecometomannys.com The Hot Boxxx Girls @ Aunt Charlie’s Lounge, 133 Turk Street. Every Friday and Saturday night, this popular bar presents a wild drag show that “warms the sequin cockles of your heart.” 10pm. http://www.hotboxxxgirls.com

5 Tuesday

9 Saturday

Manny’s One Year Anniversary and Defeat Donald Trump Party @ Manny’s, 3092 16th Street. Watch election results and help launch a year-long effort to defeat Trump, with emcee Honey Mahogany and reps from 2020 Presidential campaigns plus live music, local change makers, civic leaders and artists, and much more. 6:00pm. http://www.wlecometomannys.com

Lavender Seniors Silver Anniversary @ Eve’s Waterfront Restaurant, 15 Embarcadero West, Oakland. Emcee Peggy Moore welcomes Oakland Gay Men’s Chorus, VOICES Lesbian A Cappella for Justice and Mothertongue Feminist Readers Theater for a memorable evening also featuring a served meal. 11:30am-3:30pm. http://www.lavenderseniors.org

Double Feature: Linda Ronstadt: The Sound of My Voice and Desolation Center @ Castro Theatre, 429 Castro. The documentary celebrates the artist with performance footage and

David Sedaris @ Cal Performances, Zellerbach Hall #48001, Berkeley. Master of satire and hilarious commentator David Sedaris brings his beloved stories and essays to vivid life onstage. 3pm. https://secure.calperformances.org

10 Sunday Sunday’s A Drag @ Sir Francis Drake Hotel, Powell Street. Hosted by Donna Sachet, the event features a brunch and a troupe of entertainers. Described as “The Greatest Drag Show in San Francisco,” we agree that it is great! 11am. http://www.startlightroomsf.com Salsa Sunday with Mazacote @ El Rio, 3158 Mission Street. An afternoon party of live Salsa, Merengue and Cumbia bands on the patio every 2nd and 4th Sunday supporting nonprofit groups. 3-8pm. Beginners class at 3:00pm. http://www.sfaf.org

11 Monday Do Ask Do Tell @ SF LGBT Center, 1800 Market Street. A weekly support group for LGBTQ+ community members who were in the military. 6-7pm. http://www.sfcenter.org Pubquiz at Virgil’s Sea Room @ The Big Queer Pubzquiz, 3152 Mission Street. This 90-minute quiz, based on current events and general knowledge with a special theme round, includes five rounds in ninety minutes with free drinks and weird prizes every Monday night. 7:309:30pm. nosportstrivai@gmail.com

12 Tuesday Smart Drinking Group @ Strut, 3rd Floor470 Castro Street. A weekly drop-in group with no requirements and all goals supported.5:45-7:45pm. http://www.strutsf.org Kimberly Dark Author Talk: The Daddies @ SF Main Library, 100 Larkin Street. The Daddies is a story about love and grief--how it hurts to change, even when change is needed. 6-7:30pm. https://bit.ly/31VMxgB

13 Wednesday GAPA Volleyball - Open Play! @ Betty Ann Ong Chinese Recreation Center, 1199 Mason Street. Make new friends, learn the basics or play competitively. 6:30-8pm. http://gapa.org San Francisco Opera’s Manon Lescaut @ War Memorial Opera House, 301 Van Ness Avenue. The opera that skyrocketed Giacomo Puccini to success tells the story of giving up true love for luxury and then wanting it back. Runs through November 26. 7:30pm. http://www.sfopera.org

14 Thursday GLIDE Annual Holiday Jam Dare to Love @ The Masonic, 1111 California. Live Nation presents this annual event supporting GLIDE’s Daily Free Meals program and will feature vocalist and songwriter Lisa Fischer with the GLIDE Ensemble and The Change Band. http://www.sfmasonic.com Who’s Your Mami Comedy with Marga Gomez @ Brava’s Cabaret, 2773 24th Street. Brava’s monthly standup series presents Karinda Dobbins with Nato Green, Natasha Muse, Michael Foulk and Natasha Vinik. 8pm. http://www.margagomez.com

15 Friday Friday Night Party @ White Horse Inn, 6551 Telegraph Avenue, Oakland. This every Friday event features drink specials, dancing and live DJs. 9pm-2am. http://www.whitehorsebar.com S AN F R ANC IS C O BAY T IM ES

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SF Sketch Randy Coleman Randy Coleman hails from New York, but has lived in San Francisco since 1975. Coleman shares that before moving to the Bay Area, he studied Art History and Architecture at Boston University while working as a resident artist for architectural rendering at a Massachusetts historical society. “All of my life I’ve been an artist,” Coleman says. “To know me is to know that I have a passion for art and architecture. I love this project for the San Francisco Bay Times, and hope that you enjoy my sketches.” © Randy Coleman, 2019

LANDIS (continued from page 25) Gaston: If you’re headed out to Ocean Beach, first check the dog rules there; they keep changing. Last we heard, it’s “dogs on leash”—which doesn’t make us happy. But for a dining repast, it’s fun to head to the Park Chalet. The backyard patio has ample space for dogs and the American fare takes center stage. The fried chicken sandwich is delicious. Alphonse: Woof! Gaston: For a great burger in the Marina, Causwell’s is the place. It’s a retro double thin-patty burger with American cheese, but Dad says they also have a great wine list. Our favorite is their onion rings, but they’re not always available throughout the day. Sit outside on the Chestnut Street sidewalk and you’ll see some cute poodles pass by. Alphonse: Woof! Gaston: For the best pizza in town, head to Delfina. The California Street pizzeria location is near our dog park (Alta Plaza), but the 18th Street full service restaurant is much more trendy. Dogs are considered rock stars at Delfina, and if they have it, don’t miss the seasonal cherry pie—it’s a pizza with cherry tomatoes. Alphonse: Don’t I get to talk? David Landis, aka “The Gay Gourmet,” is a foodie, a freelance writer and a PR executive. Follow him: @david_landis, email him at: david@landispr.com or visit online at: www.gaygourmetsf.com

As Heard on the Street . . . What is your favorite Castro District restaurant and your favorite dish?

compiled by Rink

Terry Asten Bennett

Donna Sachet

Sandra O. Noshi DI'N'T

Christopher Berini

Win Pham

“The Anchor Oyster Bar's open face crab sandwich or crab salad."

“I like Catch restaurant's fish and chips."

“My favorite is Orphan Andy's chicken fried steak."

“Lark restaurant's burger does it for me."

“Catch restaurant for white wine.”

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Round About - All Over Town Saturday Night in the Castro Before Halloween - October 26 Photos by Rink

Castro Street and surrounding ones were alive with costumed characters trying out their Halloween gear on Saturday evening, October 26. The Fairies’ “Glow in the Streets” block party crowd on Noe Street and the parade of pedestrians between Market and 18th consisted of neighbors, friends, and out of town guests enjoying the weekend prior to Halloween on October 31.

CASTRO STREETCAM presented by

For many who arrived from outside of the area, the festive night provided a welcome break from evacuations, power outages, and other problems caused by the PG&E Public Safety Power Shutoff and fires still blazing throughout the state.

http://sfbaytimes.com/

items of the week Ooni Koda Outdoor Pizza Oven Your time is precious, so make it count. Ooni Koda fires out jaw-dropping pizzas in 60 seconds flat. No assembly, no mess, no fuss. Cooking outdoors with gas has never been so simple (or so beautiful). In stock now at Cliff’s Variety.

Frieling Black Cube Frying Pans If you’re one of those people that can destroy any non-stick frypan, this is the pan for you. Frieling has created a nearly indestructible hybrid pan. The PFOE free non-stick surface sits in a stainless steel hexagonal lattice that allows you to use metal utensils without the risk of scratching the surface. Durable and beautiful!

n times of economic uncertainty, it is more important than ever to shop local. It keeps San Francisco fun and interesting and directly supports our local economy.

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