Executive Retreat 2014 - 2015 Administration
EXECUTIVE
RETREAT SEPTEMBER 12 - 14, 2014
ST. G E O R G E I S L A N D, F L
Executive Retreat Attendees.................................4 What to Bring..............................................................5 Itinerary.......................................................................6 Goal Setting.................................................................8 Individual Group Discussion................................10 True Color Personality Quiz.................................11 Conflict Management Style..................................16 A Letter to Myself......................................................24 Notes...............................................................................25
EXECUTIVE
RETREAT SEPTEMBER 12 - 14, 2014
ST. G E O R G E I S L A N D, F L
Attending
Cabinet
President: Stefano Cavallaro
Jesse Marks
Vice President: Gerald Johnson
Doug Levinson
Treasurer: Jorge Rendon
Laurence Thompson
Chief of Staff: Andrew Wilson
Qaree Dreher
Deputy Chief of Staff: Jennifer Lucas
Amber Johnson
BSU Director: Rodney Moore
Kayla Burnett
AASU: Katrina Pitt
Chelsea LaPlante
WSU: Ashleigh Gregoria
Steven Palacio
HLSU: Cristian Guadamuz PRIDE Director: Rosanna Rizo CPE Director: Regina Joseph OEI Director: Dan Dispenziere OGA Director: Julianne Simson OSSI Director: Jessica Blackband SCURC: Amy Nicotra Union Board Chair: Rachel Sticco
4 • Executive Retreat
Advisor Advisor: Vicki Dobiyanski
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Comforta
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ble clothe
Hat for th
e beach Beach To wel Pillow/Bla nket Movie Candy/Sn acks Writing M aterials Toiletries Sunscree n Sunglass es Bug spray Spending money (o ptional)
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ictions? Any dietary restr ns? Any itatio Any physical lim e sent in email Concerns? –To b to Jennifer t before the retrea
Executive Retreat • 5
ITINERARY FRIDAY
2:30 pm -Meet at Oglesby Union, Crenshaw Round-a-bout
(Use flip chart and markers to post at retreat location.)
2:45 pm –Depart for St. George
Talk about retreat expectations between all members of executive branch.
5:00 pm –Arrive at Relax N’ Style. Settle in. Assign sleeping arrangements. 5:30-6:00 pm – Activities 6:00-6:45 pm- Set expectations for retreat
6:45-8:00pm – Prepare and eat spaghetti dinner (Spaghetti, garlic bread, cookies, soda, water) 8:00 pm: Goal Setting 9:00 pm> Free Time (games, movies, beach, relax)
SUNDAY 8:00 am –Breakfast (Muffins, yogurt, apples, bananas, coffee, cream, sugar, orange juice)
9:45 am - closing activities and closing statements.
9:00 am -9:45 am –clean house
10:30 am –depart from retreat back to Oglesby Union
6 • Executive Retreat
SATURDAY
8:00 am –Breakfast (Bagels, cream cheese, bananas, apples, breakfast bars, coffee, cream, sugar, orange juice) 9:00 am- Ice Breaker/ Team building activities Break up into two teams: Each team come up with team name. 10:30 am –Meet with Individual groups
Have all members write these things down. Talk about them. Share with one another. Offer advice. Collect their sheets so that the person they report to can keep them accountable. 12:00 pm –Lunch (Boxed lunches from Subway) 1:15 pm –Free time. Relax, enjoy the beach!
-Agencies meet together
4:30 pm – 1st half of Personal Reflection and Leadership Activities. True Colors and Spirit Animal Tests and discussion.
-Cabinet Meets Together
5:30 pm –snack and bathroom break
-Union Board/Campus Rec /Bureaus meet together
5:45 pm -2nd half and discussion to better understand your teammates. Discussion on communication style, open-ended circle discussion, and move-in move- out.
• • • • • •
What are issues our group faces? What do we need to work on in our personal/ professional lives? What are things we do well individually? Collectively? How can we support and collaborate with one another? What are our goals for this year? How can we best go about helping one another achieve these goals?
6:45 pm –silent reflection, letter to self, wrap up for the day 7:30 pm- Dinner at BJS and free time the rest of the evening
G N I T T E S L A O G What do you want to get out of this year personally? Professionally?
How will you work with your assistants, vice presidents, or cabinet members to fulfill your goals as a group?
What goals do you want to see happen as far as developing your Executive Board members? What programs and events must you accomplish?
What will define your success from this year?
8 • Executive Retreat
What will you do differently from last year’s “position holder”?
How will you reach out to different groups? What communities do you need to target to help your organization grow? How will it get there?
Where do you see your organization going? What action steps will you take to get it there?
What can the Executive Branch do to support you? Your leadership? Your organization?
Executive Retreat • 9
L A U D I V I IND scussion i D p u o r G What are issues our group faces?
‘What do we need to work on in our personal/professional lives?
What are things we do well individually? Collectively?
How can we support and collaborate with one another?
What are our goals for this year?
How can we best go about helping one another achieve these goals?
10 • Executive Retreat
TRUE COLORS
PERSONALITY QUIZ True Colors Personality Quiz Describe Yourself: In the boxes below are groups of word clusters printed horizontally in rows. Look at all the choices in the first box (A,B,C,D). Read the words and decide which of the four letter choices is most like you. Give that a “4”. Then rank order the next three letter choices from 3-1 in descending preference. You will end up with a box of four letter choices, ranked from “4” (most like you) to “1” (least like you). Continue this process with the remaining four boxes until each have a 4, 3, 2, and 1. Box One A _____ active opportunistic spontaneous
B_____ parental traditional responsible
C_____ authentic harmonious compassionate
D____ versatile inventive competent
Box Two E _____ curious conceptual knowledgeable
F_____ unique empathetic communicative
G_____ practical sensible dependable
H____ competitive impetuous impactful
Box Three I _____ loyal conservative organized
J_____ devoted warm poetic
K_____ realistic open-minded adventuresome
L____ theoretical seeking ingenious
Box Four M _____ concerned procedural cooperative
N_____ daring impulsive fun
O_____ tender inspirational dramatic
P____ determined complex composed
Box Five Q _____ philosophical principled rational
R_____ vivacious affectionate sympathetic
S_____ exciting courageous skillful
T____ orderly conventional caring
A,H,K,N,S C,F,J,O,R
orange = ________ blue = ________
B,G,I,M,T
BLUES
gold = ________
D,E,L,P,Q green = _______
Executive Retreat • 11
BLUE I need to feel unique and authentic Enthusiastic, Sympathetic, Personal I look for meaning and significance in life Warm, Communicative, Compassionate I need to contribute, to encourage, and to care Idealistic, Spiritual, Sincere I value integrity and unity in relationships Peaceful, Flexible, Imaginative I am a natural romantic, a poet, a nurturer In childhood… 9 I was extremely imaginative and found it difficult to fit into the structure of school life. 9 I reacted with great sensitivity to discordance or rejection and sought recognition. 9 I responded to encouragement rather than competition. In relationships… 9 I seek harmonious relationships. 9 I am a true romantic and believe in drama, warmth, and empathy to all relationships. 9 I enjoy the symbols of romance such as flowers, candlelight, and music and cherish the small gestures of affection. At work… 9 I have a strong desire to influence others so they may lead more significant lives. 9 I often work in the arts, communication, education, and helping professions. 9 I am adept at motivating and interacting with others. Leadership Style… 9 Expects others to express views 9 Assumes “family spirit” 9 Works to develop others’ potential 9 Individuals oriented 9 Democratic, unstructured approach 9 Encourages change VIA human potential 9 Change time allows for sense of security 9 Expects people to develop their potential Symptoms of a Bad day… 9 Attention-getting misbehaving 9 Lying to save face 9 Withdrawal 9 Fantasy, day-dreaming, and going into a trance 9 Crying and depression 9 Passive resistance 9 Yelling and screaming 12 • Executive Retreat
TRUE COLORS PERSONALITY QUIZ
GOLD I need to follow rules and respect authority Loyal, Dependable, Prepared I have a strong sense of what is right and wrong in life Thorough, Sensible, Punctual I need to be useful and belong Faithful, Stable, Organized I value home, family, and tradition Caring, Concerned, Concrete I am a natural preserver, a parent, a helper In childhood… 9 I wanted to follow the rules and regulations of the school. 9 I understood and respected authority and was comfortable with academic routine. 9 I was the easiest of all types of children to adapt to the education system. In relationships… 9 I am serious and tend to have traditional, conservative views of both love and marriage. 9 I enjoy others who can work along with me, building secure, predictable relationships together. 9 I demonstrate admiration through the practical things I do for the ones I love. At work… 9 I provide stability and can maintain organization. 9 My ability to handle details and to work hard makes me the backbone of many organizations. 9 I believe that work comes before play, even if I must work overtime to complete the task. Leadership Style… 9 Expects punctuality, order, loyalty 9 Assumes “right” way to do things 9 Seldom questions tradition 9 Rules oriented 9 Detailed/thorough approach - threatened by change 9 Prolonged time to initiate any change 9 Expects people to “play” their roles Symptoms of a Bad day… 9 Complaining and self-pity 9 Anxiety and worry 9 Depression and fatigue 9 Psychosomatic problems 9 Malicious judgments about yourself or others 9 Herd mentality exhibited in blind following of leaders 9 Authoritarianism and phobic reactions Executive Retreat • 13
ORANGE I act on a moment's notice Witty, Charming, Spontaneous I consider life a game, here and now Impulsive, Generous, Impactful I need fun, variety, stimulation, and excitement Optimistic, Eager, Bold I value skill, resourcefulness, and courage Physical, Immediate, Fraternal I am a natural trouble shooter, a performer, a competitor In childhood… 9 Of all types of children, I had the most difficult time fitting into academic routine. 9 I learned by doing and experiencing rather than by listening and reading. 9 I needed physical involvement in the learning process and was motivated by my own natural competitive nature and sense of fun. In relationships… 9 I seek a relationship with shared activities and interests. 9 I like to explore new ways to energize the relationship. 9 In a relationship, I need to be bold and thrive on physical contact. 9 I enjoy giving extravagant gifts that bring obvious pleasure to special people in my life. At work… 9 I am bored and restless with jobs that are routine and structured. 9 I am satisfied in careers that allow me independence and freedom, while utilizing my physical coordination and my love of tools. 9 I view any kind of tool as an extension of myself. 9 I am a natural performer. Leadership Style… 9 9 9 9 9 9
Expects quick action Works in the here and now Performance oriented Flexible approach Welcomes change Expects people to “make it fun”
Symptoms of a Bad day… 9 Rudeness and defiance 9 Breaking the rules intentionally 9 Running away and dropping out 9 Use of stimulants 9 Acting out boisterously 9 Lying and cheating 9 Physical aggressiveness 14 • Executive Retreat
TRUE COLORS PERSONALITY QUIZ
GREEN I seek knowledge and understanding Analytical, Global, Conceptual I live by my own standards Cool, Calm, Collected I need explanation and answers Inventive, Logical, Perfectionist I value intelligence, insight, fairness, and justice Abstract, Hypothetical, Investigative I am a natural non-conformist, a visionary, a problem solver In childhood… 9 I appeared to be older than my years and focused on my greater interests, achieving in subjects that were mentally stimulating. 9 I was impatient with drill and routine, questioned authority, and found it necessary to respect teachers before I could learn from them. In relationships… 9 I prefer to let my head rule my heart. 9 I dislike repetition, so it is difficult for me to continuously express feeling. I believe that once feelings are stated, they are obvious to others. 9 I am uneasy when my emotions control me; I want to establish a relationship, leave it to maintain itself, and turn my energies to my studies, work or other interests. At work… 9 I am conceptual and an independent thinker. For me, work is play. 9 I am drawn to constant challenge in careers, and like to develop models, explore ideas, or build systems to satisfy my need to deal with innovation. 9 Once I have perfected an idea, I prefer to move on, leaving the project to be maintained and supported by others. Leadership Style… 9 Expects intelligence and competence 9 Assumes task relevancy 9 Seeks ways to improve systems 9 Visionary 9 Analytical 9 Encourages change for improvement 9 Constantly “in process” of change 9 Expects people to follow through Symptoms of a Bad day… 9 Indecisiveness 9 Refusal to comply or cooperate; the silent treatment 9 Extreme aloofness and withdrawal 9 Snobbish, put-down remarks, and sarcasm 9 Perfectionism due to severe performance anxiety 9 Highly critical attitudes toward yourself or others
Executive Retreat • 15
CONFLICT MANAGEMENT
S T Y L E Conflict-Management Style
In this section you will have the opportunity to examine your own conflict-management style and techniques you tend to use in conflict situations, particularly under stress. The exercises that follow will enable you to gain insight in to strategies you might choose to incorporate into your behavior in handling disputes and differences. Conflict-Management Style Survey* This Conflict-Management Style Survey has been designed to help you become more aware of your characteristic approach, or style, in managing conflict. In completing this survey, you are invited to respond by making choices that correspond with you typical behavior or attitudes in conflict situations. Section 1: Survey This survey identifies twelve situations that you are likely to encounter in your personal and professional lives. Please study each situation and the five possible behavioral responses or attitudes carefully and then allocate ten points between them to indicate your typical behavior, with the highest number of points indicating you strongest choice. Any response can be answered with from zero to ten points, as long as all five responses for a given situation add up to ten points, as shown in the following example: EXAMPLE SITUATION: In responding to a request from another for help with a problem, you would: A. Clearly instruct him or her how to proceed. 4 2 B. Enjoy the strategizing and the challenge. 3 C. Help him or her take responsibility for the problem. 1 D. Find it unnerving but agree to help. E. Avoid the invitation at all costs. 0 10 TOTAL Please choose a single frame of reference (e.g., work-related conflicts, family conflicts, social conflicts) and keep that frame of reference in mind when responding to all the situations. And remember, as you complete this survey, that it is not a test. There are no right or wrong responses. They survey will be helpful to you only to the extent that your responses accurately represent your characteristic behavior or attitudes. 16 • Executive Retreat
And remember, as you complete this survey, that it is not a test. There are no right or wrong responses. They survey will be helpful to you only to the extent that your responses accurately represent your characteristic behavior or attitudes. SITUATION 1: Upon experiencing strong feelings in a conflict situation, you would: _____ A. Enjoy the emotional release and sense of exhilaration and accomplishment. _____ B. Enjoy the strategizing involved and the challenge of the conflict. _____ C. Become serious about how others are feeling and thinking. _____ D. Find it frightening because you do not accept that differences can be discussed without someone’s getting hurt. _____ E. Become convinced that there is nothing you can do to resolve the issue. TOTAL *Based on Jay Hall’s Management A Survey of One’s Characteristic Reaction andterms Handling Conflict Between Himself and SITUATION 2:Conflict Consider the Survey: following statements and rate themtoin ofofhow characteristic Others (The Woodlands, Texas: Telemetrics International 1969)>
they are of your personal beliefs:
The Leadership Washington State University _____Center A. At Life is conquered by those who believe in winning.
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_____ _____ _____ _____
B. C. D. E.
Winning is rarely possible in conflict. No one has the final answer to anything, but each has a piece to contribute. In the last analysis, it is wise to turn the other cheek. It is useless to attempt to change a person who seems locked into an opposing view. TOTAL
1
SITUATION 3: What is the best result that you expect from conflict? _____ A. Conflict helps people face the fact that one answer is better than others. _____ B. Conflict results in canceling out extremes of thinking so that a strong middle ground can be reached. _____ C. Conflict clears the air and enhances commitment and results. _____ D. Conflict demonstrates the absurdity of self-centeredness and draws people closer together in their commitment to each other. _____ E. Conflict lessens complacency and assigns blame where it belongs. TOTAL STIUATION 4: When you are the person with the greater authority in a conflict situation, you would: _____ A. Put it straight, letting the other know your view. _____ B. Try to negotiate the best settlement you can get. _____ C. Ask to hear the other’s feelings and suggest that a position be found that both might be willing to try. _____ D. Go long with the other, providing support where you can. _____ E. Keep the encounter impersonal, citing rules if they apply. TOTAL SITUATION 5: When someone you care for takes an unreasonable position, you would: _____ A. Lay it on the line, telling him or her that you don’t like it. _____ B. Let him or her know in casual, subtle ways that you are not pleased; possibly distract with humor; and avoid a direct confrontation. _____ C. Call attention to the conflict and explore a mutually acceptable solution. _____ D. Try to keep your misgivings to yourself. _____ E. Let you actions speak for you by indicating depression or lack of interest. TOTAL SITUATION 6: When you become angry at a friend or colleague, you would:
Executive Retreat • 17
distract with humor; and avoid a direct confrontation. _____ C. Call attention to the conflict and explore a mutually acceptable solution. _____ D. Try to keep your misgivings to yourself. _____ E. Let you actions speak for you by indicating depression or lack of interest. TOTAL SITUATION 6: When you become angry at a friend or colleague, you would: _____ A. Just explode without giving it much thought. _____ B. Try to smooth things over with a good story. _____ C. Express your anger and invite him or her to respond. _____ D. Try to compensate for your anger by acting the opposite of what you are feeling. _____ E. Remove yourself from the situation. TOTAL SITUATION 7: When you find yourself disagreeing with other members of a group on an
The Leadership Center Washington State University important issue, youAtwould:
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2
_____ A. _____ B.
Stand by your convictions and defend your position. Appeal to the logic of the group in the hope of convincing at least a majority that you are right. _____ C. Explore points of agreement and disagreement and the feelings of the group’s member, and then search for alternatives that take everyone’s views into account. _____ D. Go along with the rest of the group. _____ E. Not participate in the discussion and not feel bound by any decision reached. TOTAL
SITUATION 8: When a single group member takes a position in opposition to the rest of the group, you would: _____ A. Point out publicly that the dissenting member is blocking the group and suggest that the group move on without him or her if necessary. _____ B. Make sure the dissenting member has a chance to communicate his or her objections so that a compromise can be reached. _____ C. Try to uncover why the dissenting member views the issue differently, so that the group’s members can reevaluate their own positions. _____ D. Encourage the group’s members to set the conflict aside and go on to more agreeable items on the agenda. _____ E. Remain silent, because it is best to avoid becoming involved. TOTAL SITUATION 9: When you see conflict emerging in a group, you would: _____ A. Push for a quick decision to ensure that the task is completed. _____ B. Avoid outright confrontation by moving the discussion toward a middle ground. _____ C. Share with the group your impression of what is going on, so that the nature of the impending conflict can be discussed. _____ D. Forestall or divert the conflict before it emerges by relieving the tension with humor. _____ E. Stay out of the conflict as long as it is of no concern to you. TOTAL SITUATION 10: In handling conflict between your group and another, you would:
18 • Executive Retreat
of the impending conflict can be discussed. _____ D. Forestall or divert the conflict before it emerges by relieving the tension with CONFLICT MANAGEMENT STYLE humor. _____ E. Stay out of the conflict as long as it is of no concern to you. TOTAL SITUATION 10: In handling conflict between your group and another, you would: _____ A. Anticipate areas of resistance and prepare responses to objections prior to open conflict. _____ B. Encourage your group’s members to be prepared by identifying in advance areas of possible compromise. _____ C. Recognize that conflict is healthy and press for the identification of shared concerns and/or goals. _____ D. Promote harmony on the grounds that the only real result of conflict is the destruction of friendly relations. _____ E. Have your group submit the issue to an impartial arbitrator. TOTAL SITUATION 11: In selecting a member of your group to represent you in negotiating with
The Leadership At Washington University another group,Center you would chooseState a person who:
3 Knows the rationale of your group’s position and would press vigorously for your group’s point of view. B. Would see that most of your group’s judgments were incorporated into the final negotiated decision without alienating too many members of either group. C. Would best represent the ideas of your group, evaluate these in view of judgments of the other group, and then emphasize problem-solving approaches to the conflict. D. Is most skillful in interpersonal relations and would be openly cooperative and tentative in his or her approach. E. Would present your group’s case accurately, while not making commitments that might result in obligating your group to a significantly changed position. TOTAL
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_____ A. _____ _____ _____
_____
SITUATION 12: In your view, what might be the reason for the failure of one group to collaborate with another? _____ A. Lack of a clearly stated position, or failure to back up the group’s position. _____ B. Tendency of groups to force their leadership or representatives to abide by the group’s decision, as opposed to promoting flexibility, which would facilitate compromise. _____ C. Tendency of groups to enter negotiations with a win/lose perspective. _____ D. Lack of motivation on the part of the group’s membership to live peacefully with the other group. _____ E. Irresponsible behavior on the part of the group’s leadership, resulting in the leaders’ placing emphasis on maintaining their own power positions rather than addressing the issues involved. TOTAL Section 2: Scoring Step 1 When you have completed all items in Section 1, write the number of points you assigned for each of the five responses for the twelve situations in the appropriate columns on the scoring Executive Retreat • 19 form (figure 26). Add the total number of points for each column, then check that the totals for
_____ E.
Irresponsible behavior on the part of the group’s leadership, resulting in the leaders’ placing emphasis on maintaining their own power positions rather than addressing the issues involved. TOTAL
Section 2: Scoring Step 1 When you have completed all items in Section 1, write the number of points you assigned for each of the five responses for the twelve situations in the appropriate columns on the scoring form (figure 26). Add the total number of points for each column, then check that the totals for each column add up to 120. Step 2 Transfer your column total scores onto the form showing the ideal order (figure 27). Situation
Response
Response
Response
Response
Step 3 A B C Transfer the style names, in order of the highest score 1first, on the figure 28, which shows your order, and then enter the scores in the adjacent blank spaces. 2
D
Respo
E
3
Step 4 4 Record your scores in the appropriate blanks on the Conflict-Management Styles Scoring Graph 5 6 (figure 29). (You may wish to refresh your memory by reviewing the material describing the 7 five conflict styles presented earlier in the subsection entitled A Two-Dimensional Model of 8 Conflict.) 9 10 The Leadership Center At Washington State University 11 Response Situation Response Response Response Response Total D:\My Documents\Websites\lead\library\resources\RESOURCES\Conflict Situation Response Response ResponseResolution\Conflict-Management Response Style.doc Total 12Response A B C D E 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 TOTAL:
A
B
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12
C
D
E
10 10 10 10 10 10 Figure 26. Scoring form. 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 STYLE Score 10 10 10 1. Collaborator 10 (Column C) 10 2. Compromiser 10 (Column B) 10 3. Accommodator 10 (Column D) 10 4. Controller 10 (Column A) 10 5. Avoider (Column E) 120 TOTAL: 120 TOTAL:
TOTAL:
Figure 26. Scoring form. Figure 26. Scoring form.
STYLE
STYLE
Score
1. Collaborator (Column C) 1. Collaborator (Column C) 2. Compromiser (Column B) 2. Compromiser (Column B) 3. Accommodator (Column D) 3. Accommodator (Column D) 4. Controller (Column A) 4. Controller (Column A) 5. Avoider (Column E) 5. Avoider (Column E) TOTAL: TOTAL: Figure 27. Ideal order. Figure 27. Ideal order. 20 • Executive Retreat
4
Score
Choice 1st 2nd 3rd 4th 5th TOTAL:
Figure 27. Ideal order.
Style
Score
Figure 28. Your order. The Leadership Center At Washington State University
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CONFLICT MANAGEMENT STYLE Conflict Management Styles OWL Collaborating
I win, you win
Owls highly value their own goals and relationships. They view conflict as a problem to be solved and to seek solution that achieves both their goals and the goals of the other person. Owls see conflicts as a means of improving relationships by reducing tensions between two persons. They try to begin a discussion that identifies the conflict as a problem. By seeking solutions that satisfy both themselves and the other person, owls maintain the relationship. Owls are not satisfied until a solution is found that achieves their goals and the other person’s goals. They are not satisfied until the tensions and negative feelings have fully resolved.
Turtle Avoiding I zig, you zag Turtles withdraw into their shells to avoid conflicts. They give up their goals and relationships, they stay away from the issues over which the conflict is taking place and from the persons they are in conflict with. Turtles believe it is easier to withdraw from a conflict than to face it.
Shark Competing I win, you lose Sharks try to overpower opponents by forcing them to accept their solution to the conflict. Their goals are highly important to them, and relationships are of minor importance. They seek to achieve their goals at all costs. They are not concerned with the needs of others and do not care if others like or accept them. Sharks assume that conflicts are settled by one person winning and one person losing. They want to be a winner. Winning gives sharks a sense of pride and achievement. Losing gives them a sense of weakness, inadequacy and failure. They try to win by attaching, overpowering, overwhelming, and intimidating.
Teddy Bear Accommodating I lose, you win To Teddy Bears, the relationship is of great importance while their own goals are of little importance. Teddy Bears want to be accepted and liked by others. They think that conflict should be avoided in favor of harmony and that people cannot discuss conflicts without damaging relationships. They are afraid that if the conflict continues, someone will get hurt and that would ruin the relationship. Teddy Bears say “I’ll give up my goals and let you have what you want, in order for you to like me.” Teddy Bears try to smooth over the conflict out of fear of harming the relationship.
Fox Compromising You bend, I bend Foxes are moderately concerned with their own goals and their relationship with others. Foxes seek a compromise; they give up part of their goals and persuade the other person in a conflict to give up part of their goals. They seek a conflict solution in which both sides gain something; the middle ground between two extreme positions. They are willing to sacrifice part of their goals and relationships in order to find agreement for the common good. Adapted by Crystal Terhune from: http://www.ncta-testing.org/conferences/2007/sessionmaterials/6D-Conflict%20Management%20Styles.doc Executive Retreat • 21
Competing/Controlling is assertive and uncooperative – an individual pursues his or her own concerns at the other person’s expense. This is a power-oriented mode, in which one uses whatever power seems appropriate to win one’s own position – one’s ability to argue, one’s rank, economic sanctions. Competing might mean “standing up for your rights,” defending a position which you believe is correct, or simply trying to win. Accommodating is unassertive and cooperative – the opposite of competing. When accommodating, an individual neglects his or her own concerns to satisfy the concerns of the other person; there is an element of self-sacrifice in this mode. Accommodating might take the form of selfless generosity or charity, obeying another person’s order when one would prefer not to, or yielding to another’s point of view. Avoiding is unassertive and uncooperative – the individual does not immediately pursue his own concerns or those of the other person. He or she does not address the conflict. Avoiding might take the form of diplomatically sidestepping an issue, postponing an issue until a better time, or simply withdrawing from a threatening situation. Collaborating is both assertive and cooperative – the opposite of avoiding. Collaborating involves an attempt to work with the other person to find some solution which fully satisfies the concerns of both persons. It means digging into an issue to identify the underlying concerns of the two individuals and to find an alternative which meets both sets of concerns. Collaborating between two persons might take the form of exploring a disagreement to learn from each other’s insights, concluding to resolve some condition which would otherwise have them competing for resources, or confronting and trying to find a creative solution to an interpersonal problem. Compromising is intermediate in both assertiveness and cooperativeness. The object is to find some expedient, mutually acceptable solution which partially satisfies both parties. It falls on a middle ground between competing an accommodating. Compromising gives up more than competing but less than accommodating. Likewise, it addresses an issue more directly than avoiding, but doesn’t explore it in as much depth as collaborating. Compromising might mean splitting the difference, exchanging concessions, or seeking a quick middle-ground position.
The Leadership Center At Washington State University
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CONFLICT MANAGEMENT STYLE
10 9 8 7
• •
Accommodator – 3 (Yield-lose/win) *Score:____________ Low goal orientation High relationships orientation
6
Concern for
5 • •
relationships 4 3 2
• •
Collaborator – 1 (Win/win) *Score:____________
• •
High goal orientation High relationships orientation
Compromiser – 2 (Mini-win/mini-lose) *Score:____________ Negotiated goal orientation Negotiated relationships orientation
Avoider – 5 (Leave-lose/win) *Score:___________
Controller – 4 (Win/lose) *Score:____________
Low goal orientation Low relationships orientation
• •
High goal orientation Low relationships orientation
1
0
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
Concern for personal goals
Executive Retreat • 23
A Letter to Myself
24 • Executive Retreat
NOTES
Executive Retreat • 25
NOTES
26 • Executive Retreat
NOTES
Executive Retreat • 27
EXECUTIVE
RETREAT SEPTEMBER 12 - 14, 2014
ST. G E O R G E I S L A N D, F L