Sharp Women Central Alberta | May 2021 by SharpWomen

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COVER CREDITS: PHOTO CREDIT: INFINITY BRAND PHOTOGRAPHY VENUE: BAYMONT BY WYNDHAM HOTEL RED DEER MAKE-UP ARTISTRY: BOMBSHELL BEAUTY

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SHARPWOMEN

TEAM

RANCHELLE VAN BRYCE co-founder

DANIELLE KLOOSTER co-founder

RUBY COLE-ELLIS editor in chief

RACHELLE SCRASE director of photography

LUCI MORALES executive assistant

KELSEY EVANS administrative coordinator

RACHEL BRAUN assistant editor

THIS MONTH’S

GUEST CONTRIBUTORS

GRACE WONG business column

JILLIAN VUKOVICH finance column

SHARON MCMULLAN-BARON CHERYL MILLNER health & wellness column personal growth column

KARI LOTZIEN leadership column

CATHY FOSTER spirituality column

KIESSA KRANENBORG relationships column

JANICE HRUSHKA food column

MYLA TRENCHUK livin’ your best life

SHERI MACLEOD professional development column

KATRINA SHARPE great resources column

letter from the editor

MOTHERHOOD May 2021

“Motherhood: the state or experience of having or raising a child.” That’s it. That is what the dictionary says it is to be a mother. But motherhood is a little bit more complex than that, isn’t it? In this edition, we explore all aspects of motherhood. From the comical madness of what it is to be a mother in times of COVID-19, with Sheri MacLeod’s “The Balancing Act: Confessions of a Modern-Day Mother”, to Kiessa Kranenborg’s beautiful adoption story. We also dive deep into other less “conventional” types of motherhood by exploring a pawsome connection with “How I Became a Dog Mom”, by Myla Trenchuk. In addition, Cheryl Millner, in her piece “DINK: Dual Income, No Kids”, explores why she is childless by choice and what it truly means to be the best auntie in the world. I know I say it every month. But this issue is so special, and on behalf of the SHARP Women of Central Alberta team, I would like to dedicate this issue to all the moms out there! The moms at heart, all the kick-ass aunts out there, all the big sisters who helped their mommas in raising the younger kiddos, all the godmothers, and we can’t forget the role models like the wonderful teachers, mentors, coaches, and family friends! This issue is for mothers experiencing the grief of losing a child, the mothers who have stepped up and are raising their grandbabies, the mothers of miscarriage and the mommas waiting for their adoption to be finalized; the furry kid moms —whether it’s dogs or llamas—, the stepmoms and the in-law moms! And last —but definitely not least— this issue is dedicated to my momma, Gina! I wouldn’t be half of the strong-willed, ambitious, stubborn woman I am today without her. My mom is the most gracious and inspiring woman I’ve ever met. She is seriously my best friend. She has made me believe I can conquer the world in my lifetime and I don’t plan on letting her down! I hope you enjoy this issue as much as we did. Happy reading! With love, Ruby Cole-Ellis Editor-in-Chief Instagram: @rubycoleellis Photo by Infinity Brand Photography

This Month’s Articles 6 FROM THE CEO RANCHELLE IN THE RAW 10 A DATE WITH DANIELLE HOW TO DEAL WITH A-HOLES 12 LIVING YOUR BEST LIFE HOW I BECAME A DOG MOM 14 LEADERSHIP LOSE THE OLD WAYS 16 SPIRITUALITY MOON GODDESS, THE DEVINE FEMININE 18 PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT THE BALANCING ACT 20 RELATIONSHIPS MY ADOPTION STORY 24 PERSONAL GROWTH DINK: DUAL INCOME, NO KIDS 26 HEALTH & WELLNESS HEALTH MATTERS 28 BUSINESS 12 WAYS TO SPEED UP YOUR WINDOWS COMPUTER 30 GREAT RESOURCES ORGANIZE YOUR LIFE 32 FOOD HIDDEN VEGGIE MEATBALLS 34 PRINTABLES VISION BOARD 36 FINANCE REDUCING ESTATE UNCERTANTY 38 YOUNG ENTREPRENEUR MEGAN BUGARIN 42 FEATURE JACKIE KOBSAR 47 BUSINESS DIRECTORY

from the CEO

I FAILED! So, I did this thing starting in the first week of May. I decided to join something called 75 Hard. Andy Frisella, author and podcast host wrote the book 75 Hard, and when you go to his website this is what you will see:

THIS IS NOT A FITNESS PROGRAM 75 HARD IS A TRANSFORMATIVE MENTAL TOUGHNESS PROGRAM I saw those words and I got scared. I mean, shake-in-my-boots, how-can-I-do-this-fear. I have learned when I feel afraid to ask myself a few questions. Here they are:

Is this fear you are feeling or another emotion like excitement, anticipation, anxiousness, uncertainty, trepidation? If it’s a lower density type of energy like fear, anxiousness, etc, I ask myself:

What else is possible? What is the TRUTH in this? You see, very rarely do I ask myself WHY? I believe that “why” is a strange question. Our brains are wired to answer questions, and so when I ask myself why, I come up with all the reasons why I suck, not all the reasons why I can do something. As I started to unpack what I was feeling and what my beliefs were, I decided that I needed to do this challenge. Let me share the challenge with you.

Here are the rules of 75 HARD: 1. 2 x 45 minute workouts a day, every day. One MUST

5. Read 10 pages of non-fiction daily.

be outside and they can’t be done at the same

6. One progress picture taken daily.

time.

7. One gallon of water each day.

2. No alcohol.

8. If you don’t do the steps, you FAILED and you

3. No sugar.

start the next day, from the beginning.

4. Some sort of program where you are aware of what you are eating. Andy suggests counting macros. I recognized that voice inside of me right away. That voice is the smaller version of me. That voice is my “reasoning” and”logical” voice. That is the voice of limitations. That is the voice that wants me to stop. That’s the voice that wants me to remain small.

That’s the voice that wants to ensure that I don’t speak my truth. The truth is that she is always there with me. However, so is the stronger version of me. And her voice is louder now.

The voice that says: Of course you can do this. No thing and nothing can stand in the way once you commit. The voice that says, “a belief is just a decision”. The voice that says, “you have overcome so much in your life, this can happen”. The voice that says, “don’t try it, DO IT”. The voice that says, ‘failure is part of success”. Don’t avoid failure, embrace it.

The voice of TRUTH. So, I made the decision to start the challenge before the Sharp Women Event. I figured, if I could do this leading up to the event, I could do anything. I spent a few days prepping for it. I listened to Andy’s podcast, I joined the Facebook Group, and I made a grocery list. I also told Rob what I was doing so that I could have his support (he loves surprising me with my favourite foods). I also bought a huge water bottle, decided what supplements I would need, and then pulled the trigger. And here is what happened days before the Sharp Women Event... Part of the rules is to take a progress picture. Something so small, right? How hard is it to take a picture? The app even sends you a reminder. Guess what!? I FORGOT TO TAKE A PICTURE! I was on Day 10 and I forgot the picture! I couldn’t believe it. I cried, but not for the reasons you may think. On the app, when you don’t follow one of the rules, you have to hit the button that says “I FAILED”. This is when I cried. I cried because I didn’t want to hit the button. I cried because I was resistant to being honest with myself. I cried because how many times have I said I was going to do something, and something ‘came up’ and I made some sorry excuse and didn’t do it. I cried because I realized how I allowed my limiting beliefs to stop me from what I want. Then, I cried ugly/happy tears because I realized that I am progressing in my spiritual practice. That I am ready to fail, ready to try new things that scare me, ready to be all that I want, ready to have it all. Ready! So, I took a deep breath and made a new plan to start again. On May 17th. I started my 75 Hard challenge again. I added some new strategies because I discovered that it is the little things that make all of the difference. That each little thing adds up to a big thing.

Already this challenge has brought to me what was promised on Frisella’s website: 75 HARD IS A TRANSFORMATIVE MENTAL TOUGHNESS PROGRAM and I was reminded that how I do one thing, is how I do everything. At the time of this writing I am on round 2, day 4. Each day I have to talk myself into keeping my commitments. Each day I remind myself of why I want to do this and what the benefits are for me. The most important step that I have noticed is that each day, I RECOMMIT! I have my ah-ha moment; for me committing is making the decision daily. Who do I need to BE in order to live the life that I desire? Stay in the raw ladies, because this is where it gets real.

Ranchelle Ranchelle@SharpWomen.ca *Be BIG *Be BOLD *Be BEAUTIFUL.

a date with danielle

H OW TO D E A L W I T H A - H O LES I N O N E E A S Y LES S O N by Danielle Klooster

A-holes. We all know them. We might even love some of them. We’re trying not to be one of them. Because we want to live our lives on point as Sharp Women, and because dealing with A-holes can really mess with our Zen, this month, I present for your consideration, some thoughts on how to deal with A-holes. You’re welcome.

Some ANALysis Dad joke! There are a variety of specific types of A-Holes, though some may cross over into more than one category. The Aggressive A-Hole: This A-Hole (AAH) is a bully. Their energy is intimidation and domination. They intend to impose their will and have their way at all times. The Dismissive A-Hole: Dismissive A-Holes (DAH) refuse to hear you, disregard your ideas, opinions, and feelings. They can put up mental blocks against any perspective or person that is either disagreeable to them or, in their view, not important enough. I have had DAHs literally turn and walk away while I’m in the middle of a sentence. Not cool. The Manipulative A-Hole: This A-Hole (MAH) might be more difficult to spot, especially if you’re the forthright sort that doesn’t clue in when you’re being manipulated.

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MAHs use whatever tactic works so that they can get their way. They might butter you up, or gaslight you, or become an AAH or even a DAH. This is a very special class of A-Hole.

It’s a Pain in the… There are likely more types of A-Holes, but these three are the main ones that I have experienced. What I do know is that it can be royal pain to try and deal with these folks, whether in a personal or familial relationship or professional. So, here’s the real question: why is it a pain? Why does someone else’s A-Holiness hurt, anger and/or upset me? It’s not all that interesting, or even important to my life, if someone is showing up in ass-ish-ess (a new word, my creation). What’s interesting is how I respond or react. Because, at the end of the day, I am only in charge of my

Here is what I am learning to practice when dealing with A-Holes: 1. Notice and observe the behaviour, and let the other person own all their thoughts and feelings. Their A-Hole ways are theirs to deal with and don’t belong to me. 2. Understand that they are afraid. Yup, it’s true. People don’t behave in primal ways unless they are stuck in primal thinking. They have chosen the A-Hole life because they think it will keep them safe. 3. Say this phrase inside yourself: “I am safe.” Honestly, when we are confronted by A-Holes, if we feel reactionary, we’re also in fear. We feel threatened. By telling myself, “I am safe”, I am reminding myself that there is nothing to fear. I can then step out of my own primal brain and choose a higher, more beautiful response. 4. Step into compassion. Once I understand that they are just afraid, I can be compassionate. I ask myself, “What does this person need from me at this moment?” See beyond the presenting behaviour to their fear. A compassionate response often diffuses that fear – or, at the very least, it confuses the heck out of it! own thoughts, feelings, words and behaviour. The behaviour of others is no reflection on me, but my response to it is…

Okay, so I may have lied in the title of this column… maybe it’s not an ‘easy’ lesson. But, I know this: the more I practice, the easier dealing with A-Holes gets!

If I am triggered, that’s a clue – I am in what is called a “pain body” or my “shadow self” or, as Ranchelle and I call it, I have stepped into one of my very own piles of poo.

Happy Poo It sounds very weird to say this, but I am actually learning to become happy when someone pokes or shines a spotlight on one of my piles of poo. I am so grateful! Why? Because it offers me an opportunity to heal, to learn and to grow. The more I face and deal with my piles of poo – my primal reactions that perceive potential threats – the more free I become. It’s like doing a cleanse! I do have some strategies for dealing with and responding to A-Holes when they cross my path. I must provide the disclaimer that I am practicing this stuff, soooooo I definitely don’t claim to have it all together at this point!

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livin’ your best life

HOW I BECAME A DOG MOM

#1of4

b y M y l a Tr e n c h u c k

A selfie livin’ with Charlie

I walked in the house to 3 of my 4 girls sitting at the dinner table chatting happily. My oldest was nowhere to be found. She had the task to take the puppy, Charley, out to “potty”. I heard him move. I looked up and noticed a trail of something brown in front of his leash. He had his leash on, ready to be taken outside, but instead he was happily sitting inside the house. I moved closer to inspect the “something brown”. As I did, a pungent smell shocked my senses! Holy beep! Was it what I thought it was? No, it couldn’t be... this is NOT happening! #thedogpoopedinthehouse The next hour’s events were a blur. I lost all loving control and yelled for my #1of4girls to come. Charley ran excitedly towards her, dragging his leash in the poo – spreading it all over my kitchen and living room floor! I was hysterical! The 3 younger girls were standing on the dining chairs to avoid the jumpy, excited puppy and I faintly heard a discussion that went like this: “Have you ever seen mom like this?”

“Nope, is she mad or is she crying?” “She looks really crazy!” My #3of4 girls pipes up, “Don’t worry, Mom... it’s going to be ok! Breathe! You can breathe through anything!” Yes, she was saying everything I taught her, but directing it to me in this chaotic moment only made me more irritated!

I was breathing alright, but not calmly. I frantically called my husband, a sobbing mess... Then my nose started to bleed! Seriously? My encouraging #3of 4 chimed up again, “Mom, look for the good... the poop is shaped into a heart!” Again, effective use of positivity as taught to them by me! But in that moment of craziness, good was really hard to find. Yes, that really happened and owning a dog is not something that I would have ever thought of doing in my life! Actually, I had stated that we were never getting a dog. Rewind to 2 years ago. We were goal-setting as a family and my oldest piped up: “I want a dog”. My response: “Nice, honey! You can get one when you move out”; was greeted with an eye roll. She was determined. Fast forward to 2020 – the year of let’s stay home. My daughter pleads her case regularly, armed with a notebook of pros, her bank statement, and a plan to start her own business in order to continue supporting the dog. WOW! As a Mindset Coach, I was so proud of her pitch. But I didn’t think it would be applied towards something that I greatly feared. Yes, I have a fear of dogs. A legitimate phobia. I cringe when I am around them. I cannot pet them. I cannot

fathom the idea of one living in my home. The thought of my daughter getting a dog was terrifying.

She began saying this everyday: “I’m so happy and grateful now that I have my dog Charley!” This is a case of when what you teach your kids backfires on you! She was daily affirming her goal to get her closer to achieving it. Brilliant, but not what I wanted to support... Ahhhh... What to do? As a mom, I wanted to support my daughter’s dreams. But I was clinging to my childhood experiences of #1of4girls with Charley, her goal achieved! being attacked and bitten by many dogs and I was terrified! Then, light bulb moment! This is what is meant by doing something that stretches us, that forces us to go beyond our comfort level, all for the love of our children. Wow. I am going to have to consent. Her case was solid. Was the idea crazy to me, yes, but I didn’t want to be the one holding my daughter back from achieving her goal. I agreed (to my husband’s shock). When you’re focused on what you want, what you want actually finds you! In November 2020, the exact dog she wanted showed up in a charity auction. After an exciting, yet nerve wracking online auction... she won! My daughter won the bid! Her grit and persistence was inspiring to watch!

And speaking of love... all the poo and pee I have cleaned up, the smelly dog treats, the five million dog toys and accessories all over has been so worth it as I watch the joy and love expand and radiate in our family. I’m especially proud of my #1of4girls achieving her goal! It has given her life through these times when she can’t be with her friends. It has lit her up and brought out skills that she didn’t know she had. Charley, as crazy as raising a puppy is, has completed our family! Cheers to many more crazy doggo adventures ahead, stretching me way out of my comfort zone, and daily creating moments of joy, love and nurture that will yield deeper connections for our family! And the story of how I am becoming a dog mom continues…

Mothers Day 2021

Current situation: Charley, 6 months old, has brought so much joy to our family. Is it a lot of mental and physical work? Yes. But has it been worth the pure joy, strengthened family connections, and personal growth we have all experienced? Yes, a thousand times yes! My daughters are learning so much from this addition to our family. They have become more responsible (training a dog is hard work!), they are communicating better (not perfectly, but improving), and there’s a better understanding of teamwork (most of the time). Have I learned too? Yes! I learned that having a puppy isn’t all the cuteness and cuddles you see on social media posts, haha! But I am also beginning to let go my fears and embrace the goodness that Charley is bringing good into our lives. It is a lot of effort, dedication and love for sure!

Myla Trenchuk, Mindset + Success coach empowers women to be a leader in all aspects of their lives by creating a winning mindset. Join her private Facebook group for free Masterclasses, mindset tools, and valuable tips:www.facebook.com/groups/mylatrenchuklive

leadership

LOSE THE OLD WAYS: IT’S TIME TO STEP UP by Kari Lotzien

“I pity women like you,” a sly smile crossed her lips. Her eyebrows raised, revealing this was a challenge. “Women like you will never know what they are missing. You won’t be there after school when your kids really need you. I am so grateful that I was there for my kids.” She stroked her perfectly styled hair from her face. Her movements were smooth, and her voice lilted while her words sliced through my chest and sucked the air from my lungs. I said nothing but stood there stunned. I wanted to tear her to shreds. My kids weren’t missing anything; they were seeing first-hand how a woman could follow her dreams and be a “good mom.” Moms don’t need any more guilt. We don’t need anyone to tell us that our kids are suffering because of our choices. We worry more than enough on our own. Flip the coin and many of us have been told we may never reach the heights of success simply because we were moms with “too many competing demands on our time and attention”. In the past year, many women navigated work, after school activities, and households with the additional

pressures of online school, unexpected quarantines, and working from home piled on. Many talented and brilliant women chose to leave the workforce when the balance just wasn’t working. I don’t believe we can risk the progress we have made. We can’t pile more on our plates, but we can change how we work and how we lead. Consider the following scenarios.

Scenario 1

The key to making this work is open communication. Work with your team to discuss their concerns and how you can support this flexibly.

The OLD WAY: “I am afraid I won’t be considered for promotions when I have kids. I keep quiet about my family plans and don’t talk about my kids so that my boss knows I am focused on the company.” Start at the beginning: How is news of a pregnancy received by management? Have you ever been told the “timing was terrible” or that maybe you could just “bring your baby to work”? These comments may sound harmless, but they relay a message that family creates tension.

The Opportunity: Many parents are inspired by freedom and flexibility. Does your workplace offer part time, full time, flexible hours, or project-based work? Are there opportunities to adjust schedules as family demands change over the years? Does your business employ students to build future prospects while allowing your team to enjoy a holiday or to take sick time without guilt?

Scenario 2 The OLD WAY: “My kid has been sick a lot this year. I am a single mom, and I don’t know anyone I can call on to help. I am afraid I will lose my job.” The Opportunity: Does your workplace have a clear system for when children are sick or something unexpected happens? Are there options to work from home temporarily? Does your company provide social opportunities to help this mom get to know people? Building a community and fostering long term relationships contribute greatly to the social and mental health of your team.

What this might look like... We are moving to home offices for the next few months. Tammy is quite new to the job. • • • •

Schedule a 15-minute touch point each day to review projects Assign someone to be available for questions and support as needed Discuss the needs for her home workspace to ensure confidentiality ·Discuss her concerns or distractions and how you might support (create space to discuss these openly)

Remember your mom’s advice: “Treat others as you would like to be treated”. Building companies that demonstrate trust and respect will connect your team and help you to go farther than you could have ever gone alone.

What are the procedures around flexibility for school field trips, sports or performances? Stating this in your company policy demonstrates that you care about your staff and realize they have lives outside of work. Does your company allow for a certain amount of paid time off, do you allow for flex time to make up hours missed?

Scenario 3 The OLD WAY: “You will be at the office from 8-5pm. You will get a 30-minute unpaid lunch and 2, 15-minute coffee breaks.” The Opportunity: Assign projects and a clear timeline for when they need to be completed. Develop a process for regular touchpoints to ensure projects are on track and to answer questions. The key to making this work is open communication. Work with your team to discuss their concerns and how you can support this flexibly. How can you ensure they are set up to succeed from home with clear expectations, and access to the information, data, technology, and support they need? Working from home takes time to settle into and is unique to each person. Some people work best with set hours, a designated office space and few distractions. Others work best early in the morning with a giant coffee or late in the evening. Setting priorities and communicating clearly will help set expectations and help avoid tension.

Kari Lotzien is a Leadership Coach and Occupational Therapist. She enjoys supporting Sharp Women to create businesses that support the “life you crave.” From growing your team to managing hard conversations, Kari will help you to embrace the path of true leadership. Book a complimentary discovery session at: https://calendly.com/kari-betheanchor/inquiry-call

spirituality

MOON GODDESS, THE DIVINE FEMININE by Cathy Foster

As we honor and celebrate the day of the Mother this month in May, I wish each and every Divine Feminine a Happy Mother’s Day, whether you are in the Maiden, the Mother, or the Crone phase of Life. The Triple Moon represents the definition of the Divine Feminine cycle.

and relaxing the body physically, it has no other choice but to begin the process of healing, as it is all connected. Combining that with the gift of the Moon Goddess phases positioning can bring clearer understanding and solutions in your healing journey.

I am Cathy Foster and I own and operate the Body to Soul Massage and Lymphatic System Therapy Clinic in Red Deer, AB. I provide Body to Soul connection therapy and I work with the energy of Moon Goddess and her Divine feminine energy to facilitate in body to soul healing. I am a science and energy based healing practitioner. As quoted by the famous scientist, Albert Einstein:

Understanding Moon Energy: Basics 101

“Everything is energy and that is all there is to it. Match the frequency of the reality you want and you cannot help but get that reality. It can be no other way. This is not philosophy, this is physics. Energy cannot be created or destroyed, it can only be changed from one form to another.” Connecting physically with massage therapy, the body’s energy field starts to shift and transform. Working with that energy frequency allows transformation and change from one form to another by increasing the vibration as it circulates. In releasing congestion, decreasing inflammation, increasing the energy flow,

Goddess

To understand the energy of Moon Goddess is to understand that She is there to guide us and to remind us that all things on Mother Earth have a natural cycle – Daily, Monthly, Yearly. We are born into this world, mature into adults, age and eventually pass on from this particular life. Each stage has its purpose, and so does each Moon cycle. Moon Goddess is connected to water, controlling the rains and the seasons. Physically, everything on Mother Earth is made up of a certain percentage of water. In particular, our bodies are made up of approximately 65-70% water. The moon’s energetic magnetic pull is responsible for the ocean’s tides and so, as it cycles from the New Moon, the Waxing Moon, the Full Moon, and the Waning Moon… and all that is in between. She also deeply affects us all, physically, emotionally, and mentally.

The Triple Moon The Triple Moon is like the three stages of a woman’s life cycle: the Maiden, the Mother, and the Crone. THE MAIDEN (childhood, young adulthood): The New Moon cycle represents birth, new energy and new beginnings. This cycle is symbolic of quiet time – the time before something begins. It is the time to make new plans or to think of what projects or desires you wish to set into motion. In the Waxing Moon phase, she is partially illuminated and is growing (young adult) from the darkness of the New Moon. She represents the progress and expansion time period and to plant the seeds of your project or desires. It is the time to stay motivated and consistent in your actions, strengthening your determination to follow through with it. As in life, it is the time to think about where you want to direct your life’s path moving forward daily, monthly, and yearly.

To understand Moon Goddess and her gifts she provides for us is to truly take on and to practice so we may learn, grow, love, trust, transform, and understand that She is here to guide us through all the things we experience on Mother Earth through all the natural cycles, whether it be daily, monthly, yearly.

THE MOTHER (nurturer, married life and motherhood): The Full Moon is round, ripe, and completely lit up. The Full Moon Goddess represents the height of power, fertility, the realizations of your desires and the peak of clarity. It is the time to celebrate the fruits of your labor in all aspects of life. Take notes of your progress that you have made daily, monthly, and yearly. Full Moon Goddess also shines on everything and anything that cannot be ignored any longer that may be holding you back. Full Moon Goddess evening is great for recharging your energy and cleansing. Sit outside under her moonlight and Moon Bathe by letting her shine down on you and absorb her super-charged energy. THE CRONE (empty nest, grandkids, and retirement): From the experiences you’ve had in the Mother Phase, do not ever under-estimate the power of the Crone Phase. This powerful Crone moon phase represents a time of reflection, purging, and the decluttering of what wasn’t useful. This Waning Moon is taking all of life’s lessons, learning, experiences, and wisdom and knowing that it is the time to let go of habits, things, people, and ways of being that you may have tried to ignore or hide but now need to focus on. She shines her light on those very things that need to be addressed, changed, and released because they no longer are helping you and your plans, projects, or desires that you wish to attain in your life. The Crone Moon phase gives you the opportunity and the loving support and courage to realize and to live your true authentic self. She is made up of all the love, blood, sweat, and tears you have endured during the other phases. She is the culmination of it all. This last phase of the moon phases also provides you the time to rest and relax, as you truly deserve it.

Cathy is a RMT, a Manual Lymph Drainage And Combined Decongestive Therapy Specialist trained through the Dr. Vodder International School, and a Holistic Practitioner. Her passion and purpose is to be of service to others by helping facilitate and provide a safe space for her patients to achieve the freedom of a healthy and satisfying life, body to soul.

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professional development

THE BALANCING ACT: CONFESSIONS OF A MODERN-DAY MOTHER by Sheri MacLeod I don’t ever recall actually contemplating whether or not I would have kids. It just seemed like the natural thing to do. As a young(er) woman, I always saw my future self as a powerful business woman and mum. The idea of raising children and having a career never seemed in conflict; until the moment I held my son in my arms for the first time. My priorities shifted, just like that. As much as I enjoyed my career, I loved being a mum more. The thought of not being there for my son tore me up inside. But with no support from my then-husband to stay at home, I did what I felt I had to do. When I went back, working part-time was ‘frownedupon’ and working from home wasn’t an option. Worklife-balance wasn’t a common term. If you wanted to be taken seriously, you were available when the company called, regardless where else you were needed or who else needed you. My memories of those early years are almost hazy. I felt like I was running on empty; taking on the full responsibility of mum, cook, house cleaner, grocery shopper, wife, and employee. I often worried about getting fired for having to leave work on a dime to pick up my son for this reason or that, or for arriving to work late (if we ever meet, ask me about the time my son hid my car keys inside the seat of his ride-on!). And though it likely happened more than once, I vividly recall a time when I realized (near the end of the day) that I had put my shirt on inside out! The progress towards flexible work arrangements and support for working mothers since that time is staggering. While completely supportive of the movement, there is a part of me that feels totally ripped off that those options weren’t available to me, as a young mum.

Anyone who knows me, knows I don’t do anything halfassed. If I say I’m going to do it, I want to do it well. Work is no exception. I struggled with giving at the same level I did before kids, while being there for my family when they needed me. In the years since then, I have found myself on a constant merry-go-round of shifting priorities; ebbing and flowing with the changing needs of my family, my career, my personal relationships and myself. I’d be lying if I said I’ve got it all figured out. For a long time, I fought to find balance, tried to create boundaries and find a way to do it all. What I’ve learned is, you can’t do it all, yourself. Trust me, I’ve tried. I have been so fortunate to have the love and support of my parents who have saved the day more times than I can count; to have a life-partner who supports me in my pursuit of my Big Hairy Audacious Goals (BHAGs) and kids who, more often than not, are reasonably understanding of the juggling act that is my life. When they say “it takes a village” it’s not just about raising children. One of the hardest lessons I have learned is the importance of giving myself permission to make my own wants and needs a priority. For the better part of motherhood, I have failed miserably at this. To say I’ve got it down-pat now wouldn’t be true either, but I’m a work in progress. Since becoming a mum, everything I have done, every decision I have made has been for or with my kids in mind. I know now that being the best version of myself is a gift to them as well.

A A m A t a i U c a

Harmony doesn’t just happen. It takes conscious effort and mindfulness. Two wise women (yeah, you Ranchelle and Danielle!) recently taught me the importance of choosing how I want to show up, how I want to feel and interact with my world each day. This doesn’t just make me a better mum but a better, Sharp Woman as well.

A long-time resident of Central Alberta, Sheri MacLeod is married to her business partner, Andrew MacLeod. Together they are parents to four kids ages ranging from 10-15. Sheri is the Managing Director of Urban Errands Inc., a company created with busy families and professionals in mind!

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relationships

MY ADOPTION STORY by Kiessa Kranenborg

There were many sleepless nights and days spent crying in the nursery before Luca came along. We were already a family of choice before Luca came into our lives. A few years prior, me and my biological children chose a new life with my new husband. We were a complete family, but we all had a lot of love yet to give, and that is what started our journey. My husband almost hit the ditch when he heard the words. “Be prepared in case she asks you to meet Luca. Make sure your hearts are ready,” the social worker told us. The words seemed surreal. Only days before we got the call, we had finally settled on the name Luca for our new son, and Shelby, Kyra, and Laila’s baby brother. Looking back, we never even had a girl’s name picked out. Some may see it as a coincidence, but we see it as a miracle. Two mothers, half a province apart, choosing the same name for the baby boy they would both come to cherish more than anything. Luca came into the world on March 11, 2017, two weeks before we even knew he existed. His journey was just beginning, but ours was already well on its way. We had made the decision to

adopt after sitting down and speaking to our girls about why we wanted another child in our lives. After having three biological children of my own, the medical risks associated with my having another child were not worth it. Before we were even married, the conversation was one I had with my husband. I told him that if he wanted biological kids of his own, it would not be able to happen with me, and the conversation never came up again. We knew from that point that if we ever wanted another child, we would be adopting. What we didn’t know was that in the process of adopting a baby boy, we would also become part of an entirely new family. We didn’t really know anything about adoption before we began our journey, but we have since become advocates for the open adoption process that has changed all of our lives. We chose open adoption because we wanted our son to know where he came from, but also because we wanted his biological family to be able to see where his life would take him. Luca is loved by so many people. He knows he is loved, and, just as important, he knows he’s adopted. We have told him his story from the start, even before he knew what it meant. It was important to us as a family that he grew up

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knowing his whole story, and the open adoption process has made that so much easier. We knew it was important for his biological family to get to see him grow up to be the man he will one day become, and we knew it was important for us to have an open and honest line of communication for health information and family history. The open adoption process provides for all of these things, but in the end, none of these are the reasons why we chose the route we did. We chose open adoption for our son. The book of his life is just beginning to be written, and we have such a huge part to play in helping him write it. What we came to learn in all of this is that the book has so many authors besides ourselves. We will not know for a long time what that story will be. We will not know the plot or all of the characters who will come and go along the way. Our hope, as with all parents, is that we never live long enough to read the final chapters, but the greatest gift we will ever give our son is that he can flip back to the very first page and read the story right from the start. Open adoption has been that gift.

Kiessa is a wife to Shaun and mother to Shelby, Kyra, Laila and Luca. She is also the proud pet mom of Finnegan, Juno, Molly and Octavia. When she is not working as a wife and mother, she works as an Educational Assistant and a Financial Representative.

personal growth

DINK:

Dual Income, No Kids by Cheryl Milner

When I first met my husband and we started dating, the conversation of children scared me. It was something we discussed very early, as we both believed that having children was not something that anyone should have to compromise on. Luckily, we both wanted the same things in life. This fall, we will have been together for eleven years and married for seven wonderful years, with our dog Yoshi and his meme-ready face. We love travelling, eating delicious food, and drinking in everything that life has to offer. We are DINKs (dual income, no kids) and are proud of it. Yes, you read that right. Some women feel that their biological clocks are always ticking and dream of being a mom and motherhood. I, on the other hand, have no interest in that. Instead, I have plans to travel and explore the world, see the sights and enjoy our lives. I think, therefore, I am. I truly believe that no matter what any woman’s dream is, they should always throw their personal passion into it. I believe they should do anything to make their dreams happen, no matter what anyone thinks of them for doing so. Being the oldest, I have always had a lot of hands-on experience being a “bonus mom”. Taking care of the kids and as a child, I thought I wanted kids because that is what you were supposed to do when you grew up as a nuclear family. However, as I grew older and wiser, my

values started to change my views on being a parent. The difficulty of traveling with a young child and the hard hits of raising one to your life ambitions were not for me. Although my reasons for not becoming a mother have shifted and changed over the years, my mind has not changed despite being told that it would. The best part is that although I do not want kids, I always get to be the fun aunt that goes on adventures, day trips, sleepovers and most importantly, provides a safe and loving place for the kids I take care of. I know full well how hard all my mom friends work, and I love being the person who is available to babysit so they can enjoy couple time with their spouse or take a needed break. They deserve that quality time, and I respect them for that. I am always the person who has flowers and wine on special occasions, and will provide my friends a soundboard when they need a shoulder to lean on. I have everything I could ask for, being the fun aunt and enjoying the best part of having children while getting to enjoy the freedom of not having kids! It does take a village to raise children. Moms need help and not always from other moms. Kid-less women can help too… and change the world! I am so blessed that I can pursue my passion as an

aesthetician and not have any guilt about putting in the long hours, evenings, and weekends to fulfill my dreams. I am a tiny bit of a workaholic while my husband is away driving the long haul. A salon is a place that anyone can come to recharge, relax, and enjoy adult conversation. People come together and beat as one united community, taking that much needed mental health break. The best part of my job is that I get to meet and help people feel good about themselves. I can do that because I have time at the end of each day to renew my energy, which I would not be able to do if I had to come home and mother. I have so much respect for the woman who can juggle both being a mom and career. I just don’t think I want that for myself. My parting message is that at the end of the day, I am a giant kid and being a DINK is my promised Neverland! My husband and I are DINKs by choice. You all change my life through laughing, dancing, and sometimes crying, and I owe it all to you. Thank you. Cheryl Millner is an Esthetician and Skin Therapist at Studio 11 Beautique. She is passionate about nutrition and encouraging others to live their best badass life.

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health & wellness

HEALTH MATTERS by Sharon McMullan-Baron

The sunrise this morning was a miracle filled with hope. The geese have returned in their crisp V formations with their travelling song high overhead. My young pup marvels at their shape and sound. Their honks mark their location to each other as they coordinate their position amid the V formation, preserving the integrity of the flock. The flock is a community that has survived a harsh winter, as have we. The return of the geese lifts our hearts as we embrace a new season. Spring! As we shed our heavy winter coats and footwear, set down our screens and experience the welcome caress of sunshine on our cheeks, we too can sing a joyous song of survival. That was a challenging winter! Bravo for getting through it. Last April, the playgrounds were silent, wrapped in yellow tape to prevent children from using the equipment. That was one of the many public health measures enacted to prevent further COVID-19 spread. Families tossed wistful glances as they paraded past the silent, empty playgrounds on their daily walks. So far, Spring 2021 is different. Children’s boisterous voices ring out as swings creak and teeter totters bounce. Children clamber over climbing towers and swoosh down slides. Parents lounge nearby with eyes locked on their phones. Back to normal, it seems. However, the health impacts of the COVID-19 pandemic are not over yet. Moods can swing up and down, changeable as the spring weather. Cognitive confusion may occur because we are overwhelmed by this pandemic experience. Practice patience and kindness. Mind your mind. Monitor your mood. Make the connections you need. Practice more patience and more kindness. Keep communicating what you need. Keep building the healthy resilience you’ve nurtured. It is this adaptive quality that has been a key to our survival. We are adaptive and resilient people. Have you considered the many unexpected gifts provided by this COVID-19 era? Painters, writers, and poets have put the solitary time to good effect. One gallery owner told me they had a warehouse filled with works from all 49 of their artists. It had been the most productive period she had ever experienced. Relieved of social obligations due to the lockdowns, artists could simply relax and focus on creating. What new activities have you explored or old interests been rekindled? Many of us have mastered new technology as a means of connection. I attended a virtual birthday party that featured a biologist in a Montana wildlife centre showcasing animals to children in Canada, Ireland and England. Hanging out after the session and chatting was heartening. The adoption of technology by all ages has been remarkable.

I often think of my grandmother who grew up with no telephone, television, or internet. She had ways of connection and adaptive skills to cope with the challenges of her times including the depression, world wars and their aftermath. Whether it was through the kitchen chores and talking, gardening and talking, assisting with the chickens and talking; the rhythm of manual work allowed stress to be released as everyone worked together for the common family goal. Routines that were rhythmic, nature based and collective were helpful. Over the course of her lifetime, she demonstrated her resiliency by developing new techniques. She’d learned to drive and wear pants. When I moved to another province, she and I visited over the telephone. Each generation finds its way through their challenges. Now, I’m a flexible grandmother. I’ve maintained family connections across the many miles, nurtured a love of reading, and gave my daughter a breather by reading storybooks to my toddler grandchild each morning online. This is a new way to do age old things – spend time with precious ones, laugh and love. I’m following in my grandmother’s footsteps and I know she would have done the same things! She liked sunrises, birdsong, and dogs too. And my grandmother would have loved how, through this pandemic, we learned new ways to be healthy and well by communicating and staying connected, accessing all the new techniques available to do the good old important stuff. Connection. Over the course of her lifetime, she demonstrated her resiliency by developing new techniques As we begin to plant our gardens, I invite you to choose to build a new normal. Make it one of better connections. Connect with yourself first. Choose wisely. Play more. Move more. Sing more. Talk more. Really talk. Be healthy. Be well.

Sharon McMullanBaron is an educator, yoga instructor, cancer survivor, literary and textile artist, leader and reader, wanderer and wonder-er who loves to volunteer building community. She is a daughter, sister, wife, mother, nana, and friend.

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business

12 WAYS TO SPEED UP YOUR WINDOWS COMPUTER

by Grace Wong

Nothing impedes the speed of a business like a slow PC. Your Windows computer can be old but still fast. Aging shouldn’t make it slow down. If that happens, whether it becomes slower than usual or keeps stopping at times, there is a reason. Here are tips you can apply to increase the speed of your computer.

Close Resource-Consuming Applications When our computers start to slow down, it is generally because there is something using up the CPU resources or precious disk space. Then, when other applications try to use or save data to the disk, the PC slows down. You can find these applications by right-clicking your taskbar and then selecting “Start Task Manager. Alternatively, you can press Ctrl+Shift+Escape to open the task manager, and select ‘End Process’ to close all. To sort the applications by how much resources each one is using, click CPU - Memory - Disk to sort the list by the applications using the most resources. You may want to close the individual applications that are resource hogs. To do this, right-click the application in the list and select the option for ending the process. In Windows 8/8.1/10, the new Task Manager has an upgraded user interface, which uses many resources to color-code applications.

Uninstall Apps You Have No Use For Your PC may have come with some bloatware or apps you had previously installed but no longer use. To uninstall such apps, go to Control Panel - Programs - Uninstall a program. Uninstall any applications you won’t be needing.

Disable Unwanted Startup Programs Some programs have been made to start automatically during start up. They’re designed to open in the background so that when you click on them, they open right away. This is great for programs you use regularly, but for others, it simply becomes a waste of resources and slows your PC down, which affects the time it takes to start.

Decide what programs you want to run at startup Any programs that run during startup are usually found in the system tray on the taskbar (bottom right corner, by the clock), so, check there for programs you want to stop from running automatically. The notification area may not show you all the applications that run as it is starting. To find out exactly what is running during start up in Windows 7, press the START button and type MSCONFIG in the search bar. Go to the Startup tab and disable any apps you don’t want to run at startup. In Windows 8/8.1/10, right-click on the taskbar and open the Task Manager. Go to the Startup tab and disable any apps you don’t want automatically running. This version is more robust than Windows 7, as it tells you the startup impact of the apps in question.

Defragment your hard disk Fragmentation gives your hard disk extra workload, which slows down your computer’s speed. You can rearrange fragmented data with the default Disk Defragmenter tool or you can schedule a defragmentation time for manual defragmentation (although in modern Windows versions, mechanical drives are defragmented automatically in the background so you do not need to defragment your hard disk manually unless you choose to).

Free up your hard disk If there are unnecessary files on your computer, they are taking up hard drive space and slowing down your computer. By doing a disk cleanup, you can empty the recycle bin, remove temporary system files and other items that you no longer need. You don’t need any third-party software to do a disk cleanup – the default Disk Cleanup tool can do this for you. It can be accessed by going to Computer - right-click on the C: drive - Properties - Disk Cleanup. Then choose what you want to remove - Clean up system files.

Don’t run too many programs at once If you like to run different applications at the same time and open so many tabs and windows on your browser at once, would you be surprised if your computer slows down or comes to a halt? If you find your PC slowing down, you would do well to close applications and browser tabs or windows which you are not currently using. Practice using only a few apps and browser tabs at a time. Remove add-ons you don’t need in your browser. Avoid leaving many email messages open at once; it uses up space. Run only one antivirus program - doing otherwise can slow your computer down. Action Center in Windows 10 lets you know when you’re running more than one antivirus and can help fix the problem.

Power Settings Minimizing performance is good for saving electricity but not so good for computer speed. However, maximizing the system performance can boost your computing. If you care about this option, go to Control Panel > System and Security > Power Options > Create a power option > High Performance.

Restart your computer regularly If, like me, you use your computer all the time, restarting your computer at least once a week is a good way to clean up the memory so that speed can be maintained. It shuts down every application running on your PC - not just those running in the taskbar but also those running in the background.

to check your computer for such problems. You can use the default Windows Defender or other third-party programs. Prevent a virus attack by regularly running your antivirus software and keeping it up to date.

Reinstalling Windows If you have tried all the other methods of speeding up your computer and you are not impressed by the results, try reinstalling Windows. Yes, my eleventh tip is to turn it off and back on again. So there you have it, my top eleven tips for speeding up your computer, and as a result, increasing your efficiency and your business!

Whenever your computer suddenly develops a problem, restarting it can help fix it. Restarting saves you more time than manually troubleshooting. It can also solve strange performance problems when it is difficult to figure the problem out.

Add more RAM and/or an SSD to your PC This discussion wouldn’t be complete if I don’t mention this point. If your computer seems too slow, it could be due to inadequate RAM. To speed it up, add more RAM, at least 3GB. Swapping a physical hard drive with a Solid State Drive (SSD) can also work wonders to speed up any computer.

Virus and spyware Though not common as conventional wisdom dictates, virus and spyware could be the reason your computer is slowing down. Use a good antivirus or antispyware program

With 23 years experience in computer and mobile device repairs, Grace Wong has owned Apex Computer & Mobile Repairs for five years. She lives and works in Sherwood Park with her husband and 16-year-old son who she adores to the moon and back.

great resources

ORGANIZE YOUR LIFE

by Katrina Sharpe

We’ve all been there; starting an email with an apology for letting a task slip our mind, responding too late, or completely forgetting about an appointment/meeting. It happens! Disorganization can lead to a hectic lifestyle, causing you to feel in a state of panic, fearing you’ve forgotten something very important. I was not a very organized individual in my teen years or early adult life… But as I began my career as a social media marketer, my client list grew quickly. In the span of a year, my client list grew by 420%! My disorganization started taking a toll on my body physically, emotionally, and mentally. I lived in constant panic that I had forgotten a task, which kept me awake at night. Due to the fear, I spent an increasing amount of time double and triple checking my work to ensure everything was done. My productivity plummeted as a result, and I began working late nights and weekends just to keep up. If I wanted to continue growing my client list, things had to change. There was no way I could continue my career based off of a task list that lived solely in my head.

Proper organization put my career back on the right path Proper organization will drastically affect your life and reduce your stress. Once I found the right system to keep myself organized, my stress decreased. I spent more time on hobbies, I was more pleasant to be around (just ask my family!), and my productivity and creativity subsequently increased.

But how do you get started?! What are the most important things you fear forgetting? Write them down and make them a priority. If you write something by hand, complex sensory information increases the chances the knowledge will be stored for later. This means writing by hand forces your brain to process information in a more detailed way, which helps you successfully load that information into your memory. It sounds funny to be writing out task lists by hand in this modern digital age, but it will help you remember tasks, reminders, or appointments. A day planner is great for keeping yourself organized. I personally prefer a large whiteboard where I can check off tasks as they are completed. By checking off each task, I feel a great sense of satisfaction. I can track my productivity and no longer need to spend time double checking that tasks were completed.

Get organized A large whiteboard in your home or office is the perfect start to get yourself organized. Before creating your large task list, section in it off! Creating different sections on your board not only allows you to prioritize but leaves room for little things that pop up out of nowhere. My work whiteboard consists of four sections:

1. 2. 3. 4.

Weekly Tasks Monthly Tasks High Priority Tasks (change daily) Blank Space for the things that pop up!

My weekly and monthly task lists are very straightforward. I simply have the tasks written down in a section and leave room beside each task to be checked off. This way, I don’t have to recreate my board weekly, I can simply erase check marks and begin again. The high priority task list section is very important. This section is meant to help you prioritize your weekly/monthly task list by creating a day to day changing list. Have a close deadline for a task? Write it down in your High Priority section to be visible as a daily reminder until you have the task completed, then you can erase it. Lastly, your blank space is perfect for emergencies that pop up, client meetings, events, etc. You can even use this section to include any appointments. Seeing your entire work list for the week and/or month helps you plan and prioritize each and every day accordingly. You are reminded each day of what you have accomplished, giving you great satisfaction, and of what still needs to be completed for you to rest and relax!

Katrina began managing social media pages for small businesses in 2015, In 2020 she found her home with Cinch Communications as a Social Media Marketer, where her career continues to take off!

My whiteboard has given my life complete organization. Since implemented I feel less anxiety, I can sleep better, and enjoy my time off that much more and never stress about forgetting a task!

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food SPONSORED

HIDDEN VEGGIE MEATBALLS by

Janice Hrushka

Infinity Brand Photography

Ingredients:

Notes

• • • •

Serve with brown rice pasta, zucchini noodles, or spaghetti squash.

• • • • • •

• •

1 lb lean ground beef 1 lb ground pork 1/2 cup carrots, chopped 1/2 cup loosely packed zucchini (squeeze out and extra liquid) 3 cloves garlic (loosely chopped) 1 onion, chopped 1 garlic clove, chopped 1/2 tsp Italian seasoning 3/4 tsp sea salt 1 egg (or flax egg - 1 ½ Tbsps of ground flax seeds with 3 Tbsp of warm water. Then set aside for 3 to 5 minutes to thicken before using) ¼ cup almond flour 2 jars of marinara

Don’t like carrots or zucchini? No problem! Swap out for a finely chopped veggie of choice.

Instructions: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9.

Preheat the oven to 350 F. Use your food processor to chop up all the vegetables individually, then transfer to a large bowl. Add the pork, beef, egg (or flax egg), garlic, sea salt, and Italian seasoning to the bowl. Use your hands to mix all the ingredients. Use a cookie scooper to make the meatballs and roll them in your hands to make smooth. Place on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper. Bake in the oven for 20 minutes. Place the marinara in a large pan, along with the meatballs and cook over medium heat. Allow to simmer for 15-20 minutes.

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DOWNLOAD PDF HERE TO PRINT

finance

REDUCING ESTATE UNCERTAINTY by Jillian Vukovich

The topic of estate planning is very broad and can mean different things to different people. In my experience I find that many people think that an “estate plan” is simply a will kit they get online. But, an estate plan can in fact be composed of many more components. When I review your estate plan with you, I look at not just your will, but also at all your beneficiary designations, how you hold all your assets, your family structure, and your charitable intentions. Every situation is very different, and every estate plan needs to be customized to meet your personal needs. When structuring an estate plan, there are often several competing objectives, but here are some common goals.

Minimize income taxes and other costs You will see that we have used the term “income taxes”, not “probate fees”, since income taxes have the potential to take a much bigger bite out of your estate.

Maintain control from beyond the grave If you will be leaving a significant amount of money to your children, then you should consider how to properly distribute those funds among them. If your children are adults when you die and you don’t specify otherwise in your will, they will receive their full inheritances at that time, even if you feel they’re too young to receive a large sum of money. In some jurisdictions, if your child is still a minor when you die and you don’t specify otherwise in your will, then your personal representative may be required to transfer the funds to government control until your child is eligible to receive the inheritance at the age of majority. In most cases, we recommend that

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funds for young children be left to them via a trust, and distributed in stages over a period of time. If you want to protect your estate, you should first ensure that none of your children are listed as direct beneficiaries or joint owners of any of your assets, and then leave their inheritance to them in trust. Although “fair doesn’t always mean equal”, I will say that when it comes to dividing an estate between children, if you don’t leave them the exact equal amount, they won’t see that as fair. One mistake that some parents make is to get too specific in their will about who will receive what. We generally recommend against making specific gifts because it is impossible to know what you might actually own at the date of death, and how much each asset may be worth. For example, one asset that often causes family disputes is the family vacation property. Leaving a vacation property to a specific individual is not usually

recommended, since it’s impossible to know how much the property will be worth when you die (or if you will even own that same property when you die). For the most part, unless you specifically want to treat your children unequally, it is usually recommended that you simply divide your estate in equal parts (e.g. if you have two children then they would each receive half of the after-tax value of your estate; if you have three children, they would each receive one third, etc.) and let them pick and choose what they will each take from the estate.

Guardianship Arguably the most important time to have a will in place is when you have young children. You will need to designate a guardian in your will (along with an alternate) so that someone is prepared to take custody of your children if you (and the child’s other parent) die before they’ve grown up. You should speak to your proposed guardian in advance of including them in your will to ensure they are prepared to take on this obligation. If they choose not to accept the responsibility after you pass away, they could leave your children in a difficult position and potentially expose them to a custody dispute.

Choosing a personal representative / executor One very important function of a will is to designate the person (or persons) who will administer and distribute your estate once you pass away. This person is sometimes referred to as an executor, liquidator or estate trustee, depending on your province of residence. If you do not appoint a personal representative, the court could appoint one for you and it may not be the person you would have chosen. For this reason, it is vital that you appoint an appropriate personal representative in your will. When choosing a personal representative, consider: are they willing and able to do the job? Speak with your proposed personal representative before appointing them in your will, to ensure that they are prepared to accept the position and are capable of carrying out their duties. If you have extensive assets or business interests, be sure to choose someone with sufficient business acumen to manage your assets after you are gone. Not everyone is suited to the role. In short, estate planning is not as simple as many assume. To be prepared, speak to a Financial Planner and they will be able to assist in the set up of your estate.

Jillian is a Financial Advisor and Division Director with IG Wealth Management. She takes pride in her proven ability to create strong, meaningful, and long-term relationships. Her philosophy and scope of practice focuses on educating and empowering her clients to achieve financial success.

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young entrepreneur

MEGAN BUGARIN: Creator at Heart

by Ruby Cole-Ellis

She is a wife, mother and entrepreneur. She was born August 16, 2002. Yes, you read that right. Megan Bugarin is only 20 years old. But in her short life, she has accomplished things people don’t do in a lifetime.

A Tough Start Megan was born in and raised in Red Deer. After being bullied badly in high school, she would move to Blackfalds with her mother. “Bullying happened all through middle school and then high school. On top of that, I had a lot of stuff going on at home with family life. I grew up in a religious family where mental health was almost taboo; things were just swept under the rug and not talked about. So, when I started struggling (with mental health), no one really took my issues seriously. That led me to not take them seriously as well.” she shares. “In Grade 9, everything hit the fan. My relationships with my family were suffering and I was mentally and physically destroying myself and everyone around me. Eventually, I got to the point where my undiagnosed anxiety and depression was leaving me in my room sick all day, everyday. I knew something had to give. All of these kids are living their lives and I was not. I got the diagnosis and all the medication, and then I started thinking, ‘I’m getting a little bit better’. But it wasn’t until I took myself out of the situation that my overall well-being improved. Going to a new school with new people and leaving Red Deer was probably the best decision.” Megan adds.

The Silver Lining Reminiscing about those difficult years, Megan does some self reflection: “Looking back I must admit I wasn’t a very nice kid myself, and obviously it turned around on me. I also did things that made a lot of people not like me. I used to think that all those things and those people didn’t matter. I thought that it was just middle school, it was just high school. But, they do matter and all of those relationships that I ruined, have affected me to this day. The world —and Central Alberta— is such a small place. I burned a lot of bridges when I was like, 12 years old! I was just too young and stupid to realize the value of networking. Looking back, I have some regrets but have learned so much from my experience.” In addition, the difficult transition allowed other opportunities to arise. “Throughout it all, I developed a strong attachment to my mom, to the point that just being away from her made me really nervous. My attendance started fading, as I never really went to school. The school personnel reached out to me about this project that they had, where you can basically

take all of the learning curriculum and self-direct your learning at your own pace. I thought to myself, ‘I can do that!’. So, I did every single course for Grade 11 and 12 in one summer. I graduated when I was 16. It was really my anxiety that pushed me to be able to do that.” Megan shares.

An Unexpected Turn of Events Megan always knew she wanted to do something with her hands and to help others. “I think I always wanted to be a mechanic of some sort. I always liked the idea of working with my hands and problem solving… I also never really liked the idea that women were taken advantage of in the industry. So I thought to myself, I’ll learn how to do things so my mom will never be tricked into getting a new oil filter ever again”, Megan recalls. Megan took mechanics throughout high school, and enrolled in Red Deer College and apprenticed in cars and trucks, and then heavy duty mechanics (oilfield equipment), where she worked for the next two years. While studying for her trade, through one of her brothers she met her now husband, Zane. They instantly became close. “We just clicked, right away I knew he was the one. It wasn’t long before we moved in together. Things were really good.” she adds.

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Megan’s world would be turned upside down when she found out she was pregnant. “I was only 17 at the time, and Zane was 25 years old. Being a teen mom was the last thing I had on my mind. I didn’t much care about missing out on partying and stuff like that because I never had much of an interest in it. But, the self-image was something I had a hard time wrapping my head around. Growing up, you saw all the movies and shows about teen pregnancy. I remember saying to myself ‘How did that even happen? How can these girls be so careless? So irresponsible?’... And then, it happened to me. I felt as badly about myself as I had judged other people”. Zane and Megan decided to explore all their options before making a final decision about the pregnancy. “Together we went to a facility in Red Deer called Central Alberta Pregnancy Center. [...] They gave the facts and all my options. But the one thing that stuck with me was the fact that at six or seven weeks into the pregnancy, everything about that baby was already decided; their hair color, their gender, their eye color. From that moment on —myself more so than Zane— we developed an attachment to the baby and we decided from there that we were going to go ahead and hope for the best.” she shares. Avery was born August 22, 2018. Megan put her schooling at Red Deer Colleg3 on hold to take care of Avery fulltime. As much as she enjoyed being a mom, she also had a hard time adjusting to her new reality. “After I had the baby, I just lost any sense of myself that I had. I just had no identity to myself and I had no hobbies. I felt like I just had this baby crying all the time, which made me feel like I wasn’t a good mother” she shares.

Finding Her Creations

Passion:

Megan’s

Almost a year later Megan and Zane got engaged. Megan started doing DIY decorations for her upcoming wedding. “I got my machine that cuts out all the vinyl from my grandma to make wedding decorations and then, COVID-19 hit. Just like that, there were no decorations to be made anymore. So, I just started making other things like t-shirts and stickers for mugs and cars. I made a Facebook page not so much as a selling platform, but so I could build a portfolio of all the stuff that I was doing and keep it all in one place. I just invited my friends to like the page so they could see what I was doing. I didn’t expect anything out of it. Soon, I started getting orders from friends and family.” she explains. Things would quickly grow from there. “Soon after, I did a bit of advertising locally within Buy-and-Sell

Groups and things just exploded! I never, never thought I would be able to do something like this... It was just so unexpected... I can’t even draw a stickman (laughs)! That is how Megan’s Creation was born.” Since then, Megan’s Creations has expanded their product line. With the acquisition of a sublimation press, Megan is able to offer dishwasher safe mugs and tumblers. With the ink press machine, she can offer custom air fresheners and pop sockets for cell phones. She absolutely loves creating new designs, exploring her creativity, and helping her clients create truly meaningful keepsake

The Bright Future Ahead Far from the relationships she had experienced just a few years prior in school, connecting with other fellow entrepreneurs and businesses, Megan discovered the power of community: “My business took a turn when I started connecting with other local businesses and I realized that I’m not alone. I can make friends with these people and truly get helpful insight without resentment. Society and social media raise us to be jealous and compare ourselves to other people. The truth is farthest from that. You can truly be excited and happy for other people. You do good to others, it comes back to you tenfold. The energy of people I have met through referrals is just mind-blowing!

Megan and Zane eloped in 2020 in an intimate ceremony in British Columbia, as their wedding dreams got postponed by the global pandemic. Their relationship continues to grow stronger every day. Even though the big celebration is TBD, there are still so many things for them to look forward to… As we speak, Megan shares she is 36 weeks pregnant with baby #2! Megan hopes to work hard to finish her projects and orders so she can enjoy some well-deserved time with the new baby. In five years, she looks forward to being a mom-preneur, helping her family financially and continuing to express her creativity through her creations. You can check out all of Megan’s Creations and follow her mom adventures on Instagram @creationsmegan

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feature

JACKIE KOBSAR: LIVING WITH INTENTION by Rachel Braun

When I was preparing to meet Jackie Kobsar over Zoom, I knew I’d be meeting someone with a colourful life history. I knew a little about her time as a model, world travels, and present career as certified colon hydrotherapist. What I didn’t know, however, is that these are just the headlines to her story. From health issues as a child in an abusive home to comforting emotional patients during a colon hydrotherapy session, Jackie’s story is one of strength, self-love, and the power of “flushing out” negativity.

An intentional life Jackie lives in Red Deer with her husband, teenage son, and dog. Jackie first moved to Red Deer when she and her husband had been dating for a year and soon after became engaged. Jackie recalls, “My husband and I have been friends since we were 12. We dated when we were 14 and then again when we were 20… I’m not going to lie, I married my best friend. He is my person in every way. Where I lack, he excels, and where he lacks, I excel. We’re just a crazy good team”. Today, Jackie is the Founder, Owner, and Main Practitioner of Internal Synergy Inc, where she runs her colon hydrotherapy practice. For the uninitiated, Jackie explains, “colon hydrotherapy is a gentle infusion of purified water in the colon that helps the body get rid of accumulated waste. It strengthens the colon muscle walls and improves the body’s natural Paracelsus so the colon can function better on its own”. People typically come to Jackie feeling low energy, being unable to sleep, or like her childhood self, experiencing painful stomach aches. Jackie describes, “This treatment

saved my life. When I was 16, it was the only thing that was helping me get healthier and be without pain. I say to everybody, you know how you feel after a good evacuation? Imagine doing that up to 15 times in one hour. It’s unbelievable what can hang out down there”. Listening to Jackie describe her work, it’s clear that there’s more to it for her and her clients than the outputs of a routine session. To find out, we had to dive deeper. Jackie recalls her youth with cool clarity, “I did not have a good childhood. I came from an abusive home”. Growing up in Edmonton just blocks away from West Edmonton Mall, Jackie remembers her daily routine from school to the food court. “I ate A&W and McDonalds every day when I was 13. When I was home, I ate hot dogs. No fruits or vegetables. [On top of that], I was living in a stressful situation. I was just holding tight all the time. I just never knew if I was going to get hit or what was waiting for me around the corner. I couldn’t control anything”. Consequently, Jackie suffered painful stomach aches daily. By the time Jackie was a teenager, her condition had become debilitating. “I had a lot of digestive issues,” Jackie recalls, “Anything I ate upset my digestive tract…

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Everything was difficult. I couldn’t leave the house, couldn’t get to school, couldn’t keep a job… I had been to all sorts of doctors and hospitals, and then one day, a family friend recommended colon hydrotherapy. I went to a session, and it changed my life”. Jackie reflects on this moment as a liberating one, “For the first time, I could say to myself ‘start here’ and then move forward”. After high school, Jackie set forth to travel the world and begin her modelling career. “I was an international model for a while but quit after I got married. We started a family early (age 22) and I wanted to be home with him… I also knew that I wanted to do something to stay healthy and to get healthier. I kept thinking: there’s no one in Red Deer who does this. Why not me?” A few years and certifications later, Internal Synergy Inc was born.

“We all deserve to thrive, not just survive” Throughout the years, Jackie has reflected on her experience in relation to those around her. Jackie shares, “I see a lot of sick people every day. Sometimes they’ll start to feel better and then they’ll stop coming to sessions, and I think it comes down to that they don’t think they deserve to feel better. [I mean, even with my childhood struggles], I kept going. I kept thinking, ‘I deserve to be healthy; I deserve to be healthy…’ and

I asked myself, why was that? I think [it comes down to the question], do I want to live, or do I want to cope? And I believe we all deserve to thrive, not just to survive. Coping wasn’t enough for me. If I was going to thrive, I had to adapt”. For Jackie, thriving looks like being the healthiest she can be, so she can help others be the healthiest they can be. This is intentionally aligned with her values of living over coping. “I know people look up to me,” Jackie reflects. “There is at least one person who has an emotional release in my clinic every day, minimum. And I love that! I love that they trust me, and they can be vulnerable with me. But I see people all the time who say, ‘this person did this to me’, or ‘I had this happen to me’, but we all have had stuff happen! There are people that have had it way worse than I have, and I’ve had it way worse than other people have, but who cares? My mountain may be someone else’s molehill and vice versa, but we all have some mountain to climb. Let’s just do our best to reach the summit and look to someone else who has passed that mountain before us”. In pursuit of her health, Jackie is continuously adapting the food she makes. “Disney World is one of my favourite places on the planet,” Jackie exclaims. “I won’t eat the Dole Whip in the park, but I’ll eat my own Dole Whip at home! I learned how to do it all myself with healthy food. I can still have all the treats and not miss out. And some people like my food more than the store-bought stuff!” Jackie is currently self-publishing a cookbook of her favourite snack recipes.

But where does Jackie’s self-assertion of all the health she (rightfully!) deserves come from? The answer: years

of reading, listening, and learning. “I am telling you; I do a lot of work. I read and listen to positive materials every day to keep growing. When you are told you are worthless or you are nothing or any other cliché of an abusive home, you believe that. I’ve heard the saying, ‘you spend your whole life getting over your childhood’ and it’s kind of true”. Some of her favourite daily inspirations include the work of Tom Bilyeu, Jamie Kern Lima, Sarah Blakely, Rachel Hollis, Jenn Sincero, and Mel Robbins. Jackie explains, “For me, I’m driven by the quote by Tracy Anderson, ‘If you aren’t improving

every day, you’re either staying the same or getting worse’. I want to keep improving. To keep growing. I’m just constantly getting better and improving myself so I can help others get there, too. We all deserve to be happy and healthy, and that’s what it comes down to”. In the future, Jackie sees herself in so many places. Currently, Jackie and her husband are building a camper van so they can travel the world next year, so long as COVID restrictions have been lifted. No matter what, Jackie is committed to living the life she knows she deserves. “Since losing my friend in November, I am all about living life to its fullest because you never know what will happen to you. I am going to travel, and I am going to live life in a camper van with my husband and my dog. I might hate it and it may only last a year, but I might love it and we will travel for 10 years! I don’t know what the future has in store, but I love that”. During this time, her colon hydrotherapy practice will adapt to virtual health coaching.

What does it mean to live your life on point? “Being the best I can be! Always improving! As Tracy Anderson always reminds me, who wants to stay the same or get worse?”, Jackie exclaims.

Jackie currently lives in Red Deer Alberta living life to the fullest with her family. Together they love experiencing adventures from roller coasters and bungee jumping, to hiking mountain peaks. Along with www.internalsynergyinc. com Jackie also started www.jackiekobsar.com to help others switch to a healthy diet and lifestyle, because everyone deserves to thrive and not just survive. Keep an eye out for her upcoming snack Ebook on her websites!

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