a date with danielle
AM I DISQUALIFIED? by Danielle Klooster When we see problems, we have the urge to fix them. But are we qualified? In recent days, I’ve been part of a few conversations about how one can be of help to marginalized or traumatized people. In one of the discussions, a group of good and sincere men were grappling with how they can make a difference in the issue of violence, domestic or otherwise, toward women. The other was related to our colonial approach and systems, the impact on Indigenous people, and how we non-Indigenous folks can and should show up for them.
There are Problems I’m told there are three kinds of problems: complex, complicated, and chaotic. These big social and societal issues are all three kinds. As such, there are no simple solutions. Although the scourge of violence against women has become much more spotlighted in recent years than ever before, it certainly doesn’t seem to be diminishing. Recent shootings in the US are a clear indicator that there are many men who blame women and feel victimized when they don’t receive the attention, submission and satisfaction to which they feel they’re entitled. As a sexual assault survivor, and a person who has been trained in recognizing signs of domestic abuse, I was asked what insight I could offer as to what men could and should ‘do’ to impact the culture of silence and tolerance around men’s violence toward women. Of course, the obvious thing to do is speak out. Some men have made a commitment to do that and are posting their thoughts on social
8
|