Baby's and Beyond - Issue Twelve - Jan to Mar 2017

babys beyond TM

and

a family lifestyle magazine

Rooibos: A gift from nature

Preparing children for

medical interventions

A tragedy on

Valentine’s Day January to April 2017 ISSN 2311-5467

9 772311 546706 www.babysandbeyond.co.za

Head trauma

in kids‌

Getting ready to go

back to school

INSIDE: Features Competitions Kicks for kids Recipes

Available at these retailers Available in selected Hamleys stores.

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Rhythm of the Reef RockerTM Pull and spin toy Classical melodies Vibration

Only available in Baby City stores

Rhythm of Reef Play GymTM Electronic Neptune 8 classical melodies Prop pillow

Rhythm of the Reef Prop PillowTM Real life Imagery Multiple textured fabrics Leaf shaped teethers

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babys beyond TM

and

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a family lifestyle magazine

CONTENTS FEATURES

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Rooibos – A gift from nature..................................................9 Rooibos – Sachet convenience..........................................10 Rooibos – Nature’s answer to life’s changes..................... 12 A tragedy on Valentine’s Day.............................................14 The importance of attachments.........................................18 Safe as houses.......................................................................20 Bedwetting vs potty training................................................24 Time to see a lactation consultant?...................................26 Planning a baby shower......................................................28 The perfect dance of birth hormones................................30 After divorce – putting the comfort back into family life.........................................................................32 Preparing children for medical interventions.................... 36 Look who’s talking................................................................39 Q&A with Sister Lilian.............................................................42

HEALTH

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Effective asthma treatment for children............................45 Getting to the root cause of tooth decay.........................48 Head trauma in kids..............................................................51 Pregnancy nausea or hyperemesis gravidarum?............. 54 A healthy pregnancy...........................................................59 Sustainable food principles in action.................................62 Navigating the minefield of toddler nutrition.................... 64

EDUCATION

Back to school: Time to tackle bullying by the horns....... 67 Back to school: Raising tomorrow’s effective leaders...... 70 Back to school: The importance of treating teens as adults...............................................................................72 Back to school: Back to school...........................................74 Toddler-appropriate chores build confidence................. 76 Choose your swimming coach with care..........................79

REGULARS

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Kicks for Kids: Fun puzzles and activities............................81 Grab Some Grub: Pulled pork shoulder with honey and soy crackling................................................................86 Mini ham and cheese quiches............................................87 Promising Products: Babe-Eeze silicone teething bibs, Rooibos on the go, Increased hydration for skin............... 88 Boost your first aid kit for summer........................................89 Maddy Magoo expands, Mimu’s baby cleaning range is born........................................................................90 Book Review: This edition’s recommended reading........ 95 www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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Baby’s and Beyond January - March 2017

CREDITS babys beyond TM

Editor: Emma Dawson editor@babysandbeyond.co.za

and

Editorial Contributors Abbotts College Centurion André van Niekerk Carey Haupt Claire McHugh Danielle Forsyth Eileen Xhakaza Elizabeth Steenkamp Gavin Sutton Gerald Kaplan Gillian Mooney Karen van Zijl Lynne Bluff Marlinie Ramsamy Megan Pentz-Kluyts Mindy Katz Nolene Rust Rene Brummage Rish Wheeler Sarah Hetherington Sister Lilian

a family lifestyle magazine

rooibos:

A gift from

nature

Preparing children for

medical interventions

A tragedy on

Valentine’s Day www.babysandbeyond.co.za

ISSN 2311-5467

www.babysandbeyond.co.za

in kids…

Content Manager: Melanie Taylor artwork@mediaxpose.co.za

Getting ready to go

January – March 2017

9 772311 546706

Head trauma

back to school

Design and Layout: CDC Design carla@cdcdesign.co.za

INSIDE: FEaTurES CoMpETITIoNS KICKS For KIDS rECIpES

Project Manager: Elroy van Heerden elroy@babysandbeyond.co.za

Pictures: 123rf.com

Advertising Sales Manager: Wendy Scullard wendy@babysandbeyond.co.za Advertising Sales: Lorraine Beneke lorraine@babysandbeyond.co.za Allison Davids allison@babysandbeyond.co.za

babysandbeyond

Chief Financial Officer: Shaun Mays shaun@mediaxpose.co.za

@babysandbeyond

Marketing & Online Advertising Coordinator: Maurisha Niewenhuys marketing@mediaxpose.co.za Distribution and Subscriptions: Janine Mays distribution@mediaxpose.co.za

Printing Paarl Media Paarl www.paarlmedia.co.za

Published By:

babys beyond TM

and

a family lifestyle magazine

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404 Commerce House, 55 Short Market Street, Cape Town, 8001 PO. Box 15165, Vlaeberg, 8018 Tel: 021 424 3625 Fax: 086 544 5217 E-mail: info@babysandbeyond.co.za Disclaimer: The views expressed in this publication are not necessarily those of the publisher or its agents. While every effort has been made to ensure the accuracy of the information published, the publisher does not accept responsibility for any error or omission contained herein. Consequently, no person connected with the publication of this journal will be liable for any loss or damage sustained by any reader as a result of action following statements or opinions expressed herein. The publisher will give consideration to all material submitted, but does not take responsibility for damage or its safe return.

www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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ED’S NOTE Wishing you a happy, healthy and fun-filled 2017

I

’ve recently moved to a small seaside town in the Cape and am sitting in my office listening to the distant sounds of locals and tourists on the beach enjoying the sun, sea, softserve ice-creams, and the start of our gorgeous long summer holiday. The holiday season is upon us!

However, while I cast my mind forward to when you will be reading this in January – when book bags are getting packed, routines are being re-established, and lunchboxes are once again a reality – I find myself pausing to reflect on 2016. While it was a challenging year for many of us, what stands out most for me are the people I met along the way and the old faithful’s who are always there with their steadfast support.

These people extend beyond my personal life into my professional life, too. To produce a magazine such as this, filled from cover to cover with outstanding educational and advice-based articles, is no small task and not one I undertake alone. We have a dedicated team who manage the advertising sales, online media, design, production, circulation, and financial aspects of our beautiful magazine, all of whom work tirelessly behind the scenes to make this magazine the success that it is. I love working with these talented people and applaud their unwavering dedication and professionalism.

As the only ‘editorial bod’ on the team, I also rely heavily on our advertisers and contributors who willingly share their knowledge and expertise to provide you with informative and qualified articles. As we begin another year, I extend my heart-felt thanks to you all, and especially to some of our more regular experts – Gavin Sutton, Elmarie Jensen, Nolene Rust, Carey Haupt, the extended team at ADvTECH Schools Division, Rene Brummage, Dr Adel Rossouw, Anel Annandale, Lynne Bluff, Jeanine Beukes, Wouter Fourie, Tracy Prowse, and many hugely-supportive PR professionals – all of whom help to bring you the most up-to-date and important information relating to your family’s well-being.

Baby’s and Beyond is all about education and providing our readers with helpful, accurate articles. As another year dawns, as new lives are welcomed into the world, and as our children grow and reach their milestones, we pledge to continue bringing you content you can trust.

I wish you all a happy, healthy and fun-filled 2017!

www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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FEATURE: ROOIBOS

Rooibos

– a gift from nature With widespread evidence of anecdotal health benefits and its complex and abundant blend of antioxidants, Rooibos truly is a gift from the gods.

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ndigenous to the Western Cape Region of South Africa, Rooibos is naturally caffeine-free, and therefore suitable for babies and infants, and breast feeding moms. It’s also reported to relieve allergies, sleep disorders, digestive problems and headaches; and many physicians, especially in South Africa, recommend Rooibos to soothe infant colic.

Research is still underway to confirm its topical benefits but, being naturally high in ascorbic acid, zinc and antioxidants, Rooibos is thought to offer protective benefits against damaging and ageing environmental factors, as well as for the treatment of eczema, psoriasis, dry and inflamed skin.

Here are some interesting tips from the SA Rooibos Council’s website:

Tea tips • Keep a fresh pot of Rooibos warm for hours; it won’t lose its flavour or taste.

• Keep cold Rooibos in the fridge for up to two weeks.

• Reheat cold Rooibos several times; it won’t develop a bitter after taste like black Ceylon teas.

Cooking with Rooibos • Rooibos is a natural meat tenderiser; use it as the basis of your chicken, beef or lamb marinade.

Give a tangy taste to stews or potjiekos by replacing the water with Rooibos.

• Rooibos adds extra flavour to sauces. Dissolve stock cubes in Rooibos for an aromatic taste.

• Rooibos can be used to substitute milk or water in almost any recipe.

• Soak dried fruit overnight in cold Rooibos. There is no need to add sugar when cooking the fruit.

• Add colour to your marmalade by cooking the fruit in Rooibos.

• Dilute powdered and frozen cold drink concentrates with Rooibos instead of water.

• Substitute coffee with Rooibos when making Irish coffee and serve as a caffeine-free alternative. www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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• Make delicious ice tea by mixing ice-cold Rooibos with sugar and lemon, or mixing it with your favourite fruit juice.

• Sweeten a pot of strong Rooibos with honey to taste. Stir well to make sure all the honey is dissolved. Leave in fridge overnight. Serve as an ice cold, refreshing drink.

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FEATURE: ROOIBOS In the garden and home

Rooibos is naturally caffeine-free, and therefore suitable for babies and infants, and breast feeding moms.”

• Use cold, leftover Rooibos tea and/or leaves to feed pot plants.

• Rinse your pet’s coat with a solution of Rooibos to relieve eczema and other mild skin problems.

• Use Rooibos to dye material – the strength of the tea and the soaking time will influence the colour.

Rooibos and first aid Rooibos has been used for years to treat a number of ailments and there is much anecdotal evidence about how well they work. While some of these treatments have not been proven in a lab, they are safe to use and worth a try: • Add a few Rooibos bags to your bath water to soothe a sunburned skin.

• Treat itchy skin by wiping the affected skin areas with a face-cloth dipped in a strong solution of lukewarm Rooibos. Press very gently to dry, as rubbing would make the problem worse.

• Apply strong Rooibos tea to the skin to relieve eczema, rashes and diaper rash.

• Treat hay-fever by taking lukewarm Rooibos in the cup of your hands and gently drawing the tea into your sinuses. Hold it for a few seconds, release it and blow your nose gently.

• Calm down digestive upset and colic in babies and adults with regular Rooibos drinks.

For more information, visit http://sarooibos.co.za/

Sachet convenience

By Emma Dawson

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rista

’m a huge Rooibos fan and was delighted when Café Enrista sent me a hamper containing its Instant Rooibos and Honey Tea to try.

I’m one of those shoppers who attempts to break my in-and-out-of-the-shops-as-fast-as-possible record every week, so there’s no surprise that I hadn’t seen Café Enrista’s products in store. But they’re definitely there (Pick n Pay, Spar, Checkers and Makro) – I’ve checked this out since my hamper arrived because I’m definitely buying this ultra-convenient product for our camping trips to replace our standard juice cordials.

Besides being caffeine-free, what’s fabulous about Instant Rooibos and Honey Tea is that it’s in a sachet and ideal for people on the go – you just pour the contents of the sachet into a cup and add hot (not boiling) water. Simple, and delicious.

The benefits of this product include: • Complete dissolvability – no leaves or residual.

• Superb flavour enhancement using the best pure ingredients.

Photo Cre dit: Café En

The benefits of Rooibos are vast and one of the best ways to exploit its health benefits is to drink it. I was spoilt with my own personal delivery of a Café Enrista hamper containing its Instant Rooibos and Honey Tea.

• Taste perfected through extensive consumer taste panels suited to the South African palate.

• Refreshing and calming with a pronounced taste of Rooibos complemented with the soothing notes of pure honey.

I’ve tried my Instant Rooibos and Honey Tea hot and cold and can’t decide which I prefer. However, while absolutely delicious, I must point out that this product does contain sugar – although somewhat less than the cordials in my kitchen cupboard!

Café Enrista has provided samples for you with this edition of Baby’s and Beyond so that you can try it for yourselves.

For more information, visit www.cafe-enrista.co.za. www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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FEATURE: ROOIBOS

Nature’s

answer to life’s changes

By Sarah Hetherington, Brand Manager, African Extracts

The radiance and glowing skin that famously comes with pregnancy can result from hormonal changes and increased blood flow, but many women do not experience this. For the not-so-lucky moms-tobe, a good quality tissue oil can protect, help to regenerate, restore and rehydrate skin and hair.

Photo Credit: African Extracts

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FEATURE: ROOIBOS

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he reality of pregnancy often means skin that’s dry, itchy or pimply, splitting nails, and hair that doesn’t behave. And then there’s those dreaded stretch marks. Much research has been done, but no-one really knows for sure why some women get stretch marks and others not. Family tendencies, being a younger mom-to-be, gaining a lot of weight quickly, subcutaneous tension on skin tissue, and hormonal activity are thought to play a role. The first marks appear as pink or purple lines that may itch on hips, thighs and your tummy, and then fade to become silver.

Keeping skin, hair and nails well-moisturised is the remedy for many of these troublesome pregnancyrelated issues, but creams and lotions can be greasy and leave you feeling hot and clammy – especially in summer.

Ironically, a better choice is a tissue oil – one that sinks rapidly into the skin and restores both the lipid and moisture balance in the skin. Look for a good tissue oil with natural base oils, such as grapeseed and almond oil, rather than mineral oil (which is an inexpensive by-product of petroleum), and with ingredients such as vitamins, antioxidants, and natural alpha-hydroxy acids. You’ll be amazed at how many ways you can use it.

As a South African, you’ll know how gentle and soothing rooibos is – even for babies – and it’s been used for centuries for treating skin problems too. It’s the not-so-secret ingredient in African Extracts Rooibos Tissue Oil. The bioactive Rooibos is extracted in the heart of the Cederberg mountains from fresh, green rooibos leaves. It is a rich natural source of antioxidants, vitamin E, minerals and alpha-hydroxy acids.

This multi-purpose oil is clinically proven to improve the appearance of scars, blemishes, stretch marks, uneven skin tone, dry and dehydrated skin, fine lines and wrinkles, brittle nails and cuticles, and dry, itchy scalps. In a handy spray bottle, you can pop it into your bag and use it twice a day or as often as needed for visible results in weeks.

Here are our top tissue oil tips for moms: • Spray onto nails and cuticle area and massage in.

• Add a few drops to a warm bath for all-over moisturiser.

• Apply to your hair as a deep treatment, wrap in a towel and leave for five minutes.

• Massage tissue oil into your scalp to relieve flaking and itching.

• Apply to dry skin on your elbows, knees, and heels.

• To help avoid or minimise stretchmarks, smooth onto hips, thighs, and tummy.

• Keep a bottle in the kitchen and bathroom to rub into hard-working hands.

• Rub a few drops into scars – especially if you have had a Caesarean – and blemish marks a few times a day.

For more information, visit www.africanextracts.com.

www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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FEATURE

A tragedy

on Valentine’s Day

By Mindy Katz

We were the perfect little family – two loving parents, one super-cute boy, and a baby on the way. Little did we know that just over a year later our lives would be turned upside down by a devastating tragedy.

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fter a healthy pregnancy, the day of our second child’s birth arrived. Everything went well and our little princess, Abigail Jane, was born. We were so happy but could never have known that this special soul would only be with us for 388 days.

Abi was a little firecracker and even at such a young age we were able to communicate with her and she let us know what she wanted. With Abi I did things totally differently from what I did with my son – I breastfed her for much longer, I let her sleep on us as much as possible, and she slept in our bed with us at night. I kept Abi close to me and held her as much as I could.

On Friday evenings, we have family dinner. At the last supper we all had together Abi insisted on having her dessert first. She loved it and had ice cream all over her face. It was a fun, happy evening.

Saturday, February 14, 2015, began as usual with my mom helping me with the kids while I got ready for work – I was a spa manager. That particular day we had any early client and I needed to open earlier than usual. Before leaving, I dressed Abi in her new blue dress she got for her birthday. At a year old she was a good walker and what I couldn’t know, looking at her in her new dress, was that in a couple of hours my life would take an earth-shattering turn.

Photo credit: Mindy & David Katz

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FEATURE I just knew My son, Robert, asked if he could ride his bike outside.

Normally, I wouldn’t allow this while I was reversing out but that morning I opened the door for him. I took my bags and said goodbye thinking that my mom, who was making breakfast for Abi in my kitchen, would hear. When I got my bag to leave, Abi was sitting on the floor playing with the laundry basket.

Rob and I walked outside and I left the safety gate open. I told Rob to wait next to the pot plant until I was out of the driveway. What I didn’t realise was that Abi was making her way out of the kitchen. I got into the car and reversed. I felt something but didn’t make anything of it until my mom ran out and then I knew. I could not get out of the car fast enough and didn’t even check to see if she was alive, I just knew she was not with us anymore.

My son witnessed all of this unfold. I didn’t attend to him immediately as I was focused on calling for help, which I wasn’t actually capable of doing because I was screaming. My neighbours came out to see what was happening. My husband was out running at that time and my mom left him a voice mail saying to come home immediately. I couldn’t stay inside my property and waited outside with my neighbour.

The police and ambulance were on the way and all I remember was hearing sirens, which still give me a nervous feeling and remind me of the accident.

My whole world crumbled Two thoughts went through my head – the first was: ‘How could I do this to my child, and how could I have been so irresponsible?’ The second was that my husband was going to reject me. I was in complete shock and numb, my whole world had crumbled. I eventually went to another neighbour’s home and just sat there staring, not knowing what to say or think. My husband arrived and I just said: ‘I am so sorry, I didn’t know.’ He hugged me and said, ‘I don’t blame you’.

After several hours, I went home to my family. My husband had covered Abi but I could see her legs and feet, which were one of my favourite parts to kiss and touch. We couldn’t move her immediately as it was treated as a crime scene.

Slowly family arrived and I heard them crying. I asked them to not judge me and said that it was an accident. I remember my husband’s aunt just holding me tightly. My mother-in-law flew in from Port Elizabeth, and my sister drove back from the Kruger Park to be with us.

Finally, my husband came into the house and said they had taken her away. He was the one who put her into the van. And that was it, time ticked by so slowly for the rest of the day. We lit a candle and created a little shrine for Abi with everything she liked including her pyjamas, which were so valuable to us because they smelled like Abi and that was the last bit of her we had, and memories of course.

Everything was so surreal and I just wanted to run away. ‘How do you go from a perfect family to this?’

We arranged a service for Abi to celebrate her life with us. For my son’s third birthday we got balloons, which filled the car and Abi loved them. So, we got balloons to release for Abi and wrote messages on www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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them for her. The service was incredibly special and we all shared something about her. Tamara Dey and my brother-in-law, Vince, sang Over the Rainbow, which was the tipping point for me and, to this day, still makes me cry and takes me back to saying goodbye to her when I hear it.

We decided to cremate Abi. She is with us at home and sometimes we take her with us when we travel.

We love having her close to us.

The healing process Family and friends supported us on the day and, once it was over, we felt a little lighter – the anticipation of the day weighed on us all. We made a pact to go to the coast to get away from home, but we only stayed for three weeks – life goes on and we couldn’t run away forever. Sometimes we just need to face our life and deal with the trauma and healing.

When we returned, I found myself slipping away.

We began our counselling journey and met some amazing people. While I don’t know where we would be today without our counsellors, I also realised that because it is very expensive, sadly counselling is not readily available to everybody.

Reflecting on our healing process, it’s interesting to note that, in our relationship, we were never down at the same time. One of us was usually able to lift the other up on the bad days. While we’d always been a strong couple, this called for serious strength in our relationship. My husband is incredible. He has stood by me and supported me without blame. I am not sure I’d have been as supportive and forgiving if it was the other way around.

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FEATURE Nothing in our lives was the same anymore.

Everything was turned upside down and inside out. I describe it as taking a woman’s handbag, holding it upside down, and shaking it. That is what it felt like. We started seeing a trauma counsellor, relationship psychologist, and my son went to a child psychologist. These amazing people have helped us, and walked the journey with us. Without them, I don’t think we would be where we are now. We still see them on a weekly basis – our trauma has affected every part of our lives and how we deal with day-today activities, challenges and highlights. However, it’s also incredible how your body protects you against this trauma and guards you. I try and picture Abi, all her moments, and it’s a complete blur that I hope will clear in the future. If it wasn’t for photos, and videos that I still can’t watch, I would not be able to recall her.

Moving forward We chose to move forward as a family, to transition into healing, and to continue with our lives. I ask myself every day what Abi would want us to do? I feel she would want us to live our lives and be happy – which is what I would want if it were me that left.

Sometimes it’s not easy. You feel like you are not supposed to feel this way. But there is no handbook for this and you do what you need to.

The day Abi died, the first thing I said is that I wanted another baby – not to replace her but to fill the hole of longing and nurturing that Abi had left.

While we were keen to get pregnant, my state of mind and body were not ready. I wasn’t coping and was prescribed an anti-depressant, but I went off my sleeping tablets for something more natural and safer for planning a pregnancy. A few weeks later I realised I was pregnant. We were both happy and sad, and wondered how we’d cope.

Sparkles I was a bit worried up to 12 weeks, but all was good and we shared the news. Everybody was happy and suggested that this baby would be a big step in our healing process. I loved all my pregnancies and it was the same for this one.

At our 20-week scan we discovered we were having a girl. My son named her sparkles, which was so apt as she was the sparkle in our lives. On February 19, 2016, Emily Jane was born, healthy and very much loved by us all. While Emily has been an incredible healing power for our family, Abi is still so alive in us and we talk about her every day. At first it was hard. I wondered how I would cope if Emily looked like Abi, and what about all the milestones? But Emily is her own being

Sometimes we just need to face our life and deal with the trauma and healing.”

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Part of my heart is forever broken but Abi will always be part of our family.” and not for one minute do I feel she is a replacement for Abi. We love her so much and we see her sister in her. When I miss and think about Abi, I hold Emily a little longer and more tightly, and say thank you to her for coming into our lives.

We feel Abi was meant to leave this world, that she was an old soul, and came to do what she had to. I also feel she sent us Emily because she couldn’t be with us for too long. Looking back at photos of Abi in the weeks leading up to the accident, we actually see something in her eyes. I always remember my last night with her and feel she taught me such valuable lessons.

Finding a balance Through this trauma, I had to find me again and also be a mom – we tried to keep our everyday routines as normal as possible for my son so he would feel safe. He can talk to us about what he saw and how he felt that day, which gives me a sense of pride as we created that space where he feels safe to tell us anything. But, I still need to keep reminding myself that he is telling me what he saw and is not blaming me. The blame and guilt does not disappear, but you do move away from it and slowly it recedes. I also had to find myself in other aspects of my life, and that pushed me to begin beauty therapy again but with a different approach. I would like to do more healing work and maybe in the future counsel parents in my position or even do a talk about our journey.

Now, I am so aware when I leave home, and being around kids when I reverse sometimes scares me. When I reverse, or just drive over a stick, I get a nervous feeling. The day of the accident will be embedded in my mind forever.

Part of my heart is forever broken but Abi will always be part of our family. We celebrate her birthday and her ‘angelversaries’, we continue to do good for others, and she inspires us to love and be happy. She always reminds us in some way that she is here – a butterfly, song, or just a strong feeling of her presence. My husband recently got a tattoo of her on his arm and now she is forever with us. Our family is complete with her there, just not in real life.

I do not regret anything about her life except the day of the accident. Abi in Hebrew means to ‘give joy’ and that is exactly what she did. She was always a happy little girl.

Ed: Mindy has shared her family’s tragic, yet heartwarming story with Baby’s and Beyond as part of her healing process, and also to remind our readers that there’s always hope, love and light, no matter how hard the journey may be.

www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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FEATURE

The importance of

attachment

By Nolene Rust

Attachment is one of the strongest forms of bonding, characterised by the highest level of intimacy that can be experienced by two people.

It is one of the most powerful and important predictors of survival, safety, security, and fulfilment.

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he theoretical definition of attachment, as rendered by professionals, refers to an emotional bond between a baby and his caregiver that transcends culture and fosters a sense of security that contributes towards mental health and growth.

Professionals all agree that through a secure attachment, myriad positive developmental factors are set in place. It is through this that children develop social skills, equipping them to deal and interact effectively with others. These children can observe and interpret non-verbal communication appropriately, which is learnt through a physical close proximity to their attuned caregivers.

This little one then shows great social abilities and is usually the popular one among friends.

The attachment process releases endorphins as it speaks to the feelgood centre of the brain. So, when attachment happens, the brain can structure itself and function optimally. In turn, this stimulates brain development and the regulation of emotions happens more easily. This child will also be better equipped to deal with stress.

Another benefit of a secure attachment is that it is carried over trans-generationally. This means that a securely-attached child grows up to be a securelyattached adult and parent, playing a paramount role in laying down securely-attached neuron pathways for their children.

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Research also indicates the positive outcome that secure attachment has on living a long and healthy life. Securely-attached adults also show that they are more fulfilled in their marriages, making good relational choices, which elongates their life. These adults are also seemingly more fulfilled at work as their social skills contribute to sound relationships with colleagues.

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FEATURE How does the process of attachment work?

For little babies, we look at what we call the relaxation-arousal cycle. This cycle begins with a baby in homeostasis, being happy and having all his needs met. Then a new need arises, which causes the baby to protest, perhaps by crying. For this need to be met, the baby needs an attuned adult who is there and available, and who interprets this need and responds appropriately. This brings the baby to a place of homeostasis, setting the process of secure attachment in place and allowing for further development.

Over time as needs are met, time after time, babies realise to trust in the adult and their ability to meet the baby’s need. This helps the baby to navigate his own protest behaviours to a place where delayed gratification becomes easier and energy can be put towards growth and development.

Later, with older children, the process broadly looks the same, but both parties’ repertoire expands to such an extent that non-verbal behaviour, as a whole, is interpreted and responded to, keeping the attachment process in play. This is referred to as reflective functioning/mirroring. The parent utilises the child’s non-verbal cues and responds. This means that I will notice what my child is noticing, or guess what my child is thinking about, and be aware of what he is feeling. Reflective functioning is crucial throughout your child’s childhood, including the teenage years.

Fostering and maintaining a secure attachment It is impossible to maintain a secure attachment without spending time with our children. A wise person once said: ‘You are your child’s favourite toy’.

This statement holds a lot of truth because children need to know that we don’t only love them, but we also like them. And what a better way of conveying this message than by spending time together?

When looking at previous theories of attachment, the role of hugs and kisses was greatly emphasised.

However, now the concept of reflective functioning has helped us to understand there is more to attachment than just hugs and kisses. Thinking about what my child is thinking, thinking about what he is feeling, and engaging with him based on this seems to contribute the most to a secure attachment.

Again, spending time together helps a lot with this.

It is quite difficult to ‘hold’ a person in your thoughts and engage in this manner for an extended period of time without any other interruptions! Thus, small amounts of time at first is suggested.

Attachment is an enduring affective bond characterised by a tendency to seek and maintain proximity to a specific person.” – Ainsworth

The idea is to be with your little one and just notice him and his behaviour, and then respond to this. This can be done throughout the day as you go about your business.

Don’t forget the teenagers Just because teenagers’ needs differ from those of younger children, and because they seem to want to spend more time with their friends than with you, you should not shy away from still attaching with them.

Their need is still paramount, it’s just difficult for them to ask for it.

Without attachment, our poor teenagers are emotionally hungry and left to their own devices to get their emotional tanks filled.

What does a secure attachment look like?

What a secure attachment in childhood looks like just amplifies and carries over into adulthood. A securelyattached child feels emotionally safe and connected and can venture to explore and learn more about his world. This builds confidence and aids the child in growing more successful connections with others.

This securely-attached child then has a template to utilise when dealing with strange and new situations. This little one has the ability to regulate his own emotions early in life and also proves to have a wonderful ability to notice and understand other people’s emotions and respond to them appropriately.

If you are worried about the attachment you have with your child, consult a professional trained to understand attachment and attachment therapy to assist you.

Nolene Rust is a qualified forensic social worker and a registered counsellor specialising in play therapy. For nine years, she has worked with families and children in welfare organisations, hospitals, in schools, and in the private sector. Her work includes advocating for children’s rights and working with abused and neglected children in a child protection and counselling capacity. Nolene is a regular speaker on radio, presents seminars, is involved with Jelly Beanz (NGO), and is vice president of OPSSA. To contact Nolene, call 012 7526503 or email nolene.rust@gmail.com.

www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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2016/12/19 10:33 PM

FEATURE

Safe as houses Our homes, usually the place where we feel the safest, can be fraught with danger when you have a baby or toddler on the move. Emma Dawson considers some of the threats to your child’s safety at home, and provides tips for helping you to protect your family.

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ven before your baby begins crawling at around eight months, he’ll already be super curious and on the move. Before you get to that point, you’ll need to consider every eventuality and pre-empt what he’ll get into and where he’ll want to explore once when he’s crawling, walking and climbing.

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Water and pool safety

Every year, in our summer editions of Baby’s And Beyond, I publish articles about water safety. This is because, in South Africa, drowning is listed as one of the top causes of unnatural death in children. In 90% of these cases, children were under some sort of adult supervision.

www.babysandbeyond.co.za

2016/12/19 10:33 PM

FEATURE At home, be aware that a child can drown in swimming pools, ponds, ditches, reservoirs, bathtubs, toilets, washing machines, five-gallon buckets, sinks, portable ‘baby’ washtubs, portable kiddie pools, portable spas, fish tanks, animal watering troughs, mop buckets, food, rimless tires and dog bowls.

When it comes to pool safety there are a number of options – a safety net, a pool fence and lock, a pool cover, and a pool alarm. Each has its pros and cons, which is why a layered approach, together with vigilant adult supervision, is strongly advised.

For all the pool safety information you need, visit www.topstep.co.za.

Slips, trips and falls Falls are part of growing up, but there are some that can, and must be prevented.

• Never leave your baby alone on beds or sofas, in a highchair, on a changing table, or in any other spot that he could fall from.

• Ensure that your baby or toddler cannot get out of an open window. Use window guards, window stops, and cut looped window-blind cords or use blind cleats to prevent choking.

• Install gates at the top and bottom of stairs.

• Ensure all balconies and staircases have safety-rated banisters installed and block openings that your child could squeeze through.

• Non-skid pads under rugs are another good option.

Falls and collisions with furniture are another concern so you might want to add cushioned corner guards or edging to coffee and side tables, hearths, and any other sharp-cornered surfaces.

In the kitchen The kitchen is definitely a room where you don’t want your child to get into trouble if you turn your back for a second.

• If you have cleaning supplies, detergents, flammable material, alcohol, cigarettes, lighters and matches in low cabinets or drawers, rearrange your kitchen so that these are on a top, hard-to-reach shelf.

• Even if you have safety devices on your doors and drawers, bottom units should only contain items that are safe – such as pots and pans and plastic containers.

• Move plastic and paper bags (suffocation hazards) knives, breakables, heavy pots, and other dangerous items to hard-to-reach cupboards that have a safety latch.

• Don’t forget that once your baby can climb, your drawers make a perfect ladder and he will be able to reach just about anything.

• Unplug small appliances – irons, coffee pots and other kitchen equipment – when not in use, and never let the cords dangle over the edge of a counter top.

• Remove fridge magnets and other choking hazards.

• Turn pot handles away from the edge of the stove when cooking and, when possible, only use back burners. www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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Take one room at a time and consider everything that could be dangerous.”

• Don’t carry hot food or drinks and your baby at the same time.

• Keep hot food and drinks away from edges of tables and counters.

• Don’t hold your baby while cooking at the stove.

• Secure the oven door with a latch.

In the bathroom The bathroom poses another set of potential dangers and vigilance here is paramount. Remember, no safety device is a substitute for adult supervision.

• When bathing your baby, never turn your back for a second.

• Test water temperature on your wrist • Install a non-slip bath mat and perhaps a soft cover over the tap and knobs.

• Get a lock for the toilet • Move harmful products that could possibly poison your child

Other hazards • Move all electrical appliances (and their cords) out of reach (this includes in the bathroom) • Don’t forget that your handbag, or a visitor’s handbag, may contain medicines, toiletries, and other dangers. Move these out of reach of small hands.

• Bolt bookshelves to walls so they can’t be pulled over • Ornaments and candles are also items that could be dangerous or easily broken. Store these somewhere safe.

• Use child-proof covers for electrical wall points.

• Ensure any house plants (and those in your garden) are not poisonous.

• The garage should be off limits to infants and toddlers.

• Don’t put furniture, potted plants or any climbable objects near banisters, deck railings, or pool fences.

• Vitamins, minerals, and pharmaceuticals will look like sweets to your child. Keep them in hard-toreach places with a safety latch installed. Childresistant caps should not be relied on.

This is by no means an exhaustive list of potential hazards but rather a starting point to get you thinking about safety around your home. Take one room at a time and consider everything that could be dangerous – and don’t forget to get down on your hands and knees for a baby and toddler’s view of the world.

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2016/12/19 10:29 PM

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2016/12/19 10:29 PM

FEATURE

Bedwetting vs potty training

By Rish Wheeler, Pharmacist

Understanding why children wet the bed is the first step in dealing with this common childhood problem.

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hat is bedwetting? The medical term for bedwetting is nocturnal enuresis and simply means the involuntary discharge of urine at night while a child is sleeping.

Dispelling the misconceptions of bedwetting While 95% of boys and girls are potty trained by the age of four, still 40% of parents say their child between the ages of four and six wets the bed once a week. The secrecy about bedwetting makes the situation tougher for kids and parents alike, and wet beds leave bad feelings all around.

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Frustrated parents sometimes think their children are wetting the bed out of laziness. Kids themselves fear something is wrong with them and the worry of wetting the bed at a friend’s sleepover can create social awkwardness. Understanding bedwetting’s causes is the first step to dealing with this common childhood problem.

43% of parents think they can potty train their child out of bedwetting, but this is a misconception.

The usual bedwetting suspects While there is no single cause of bedwetting, here are some common reasons: www.babysandbeyond.co.za

2016/12/19 10:33 PM

FEATURE

43% of parents think they can potty train their children out of bedwetting.”

• There is a bedwetting gene – chances are, if you wet the bed as a child then don’t be surprised when your child does it too.

• Delayed bladder maturity refers to the brain and bladder communicating with each other during sleep and this takes longer in some kids.

• Low anti-diuretic hormone – this hormone tells the kidneys to make less urine and if less of this hormone is released during sleep, it means more urine and a greater chance of bedwetting.

• Deep sleepers are children that sleep so deeply that their brains don’t get the signal that their bladders are full.

• Smaller ‘functional’ bladder – it’s possible that an early signal is sent to the brain during sleep that the bladder if full.

• Constipation causes pressure on the bladder when the bowel is full and can cause uncontrolled bladder contractions during waking and sleeping. Bladder infections should also be ruled out.

Medical causes of bedwetting are nearly always uncovered by simply talking to the child and parents and performing an examination for confirmation.

Paediatricians don’t normally diagnose nocturnal enuresis until the age of six as the vast majority of kids have nothing medically wrong with them and there’s no cause for major concern.

Bedwetting solutions Nearly half of parents agree that middle-of-thenight clean-ups are the most challenging aspect of bedwetting, and around 60% agree that a child is more confident after a dry night’s sleep.

www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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A dry night’s sleep is possible Bedwetting is a normal part of a child’s development and requires the right bedwetting management.

Night time bladder control can take some time to master. Whether it’s a few weeks or a few years, for almost all kids it will pass with time. Assure your child that bedwetting is common. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. Make sure siblings also understand and don’t allow them to tease the bedwetter. With this reassurance, support and patience, your child can look forward to dry nights ahead.

Rish is a mom of two beautiful girls – age 10 and 11. She has been practicing as a pharmacist for more than 16 years, and undertakes clinical work in the hospital sector as well as mentoring for a container medicine store project in Khayelitsha that aims to make healthcare accessible to all.

Rish’s passion is treating patients holistically by looking at the symptoms as well as the person and their lifestyle to come up with a complete treatment plan. She enjoys being creative, loves the outdoors, running, and being in the ocean as often as possible.

Photo credit: Rish Wheeler

Bedwetting is a normal part of a child’s development and requires the right bedwetting management.”

Here are some tips to help your child get through the night without an incident: 1. Encourage a routine of going to the toilet before bedtime.

2. Control fluid intake a few hours before bedtime and fully emptying the bladder before going to sleep. Drinks with caffeine, as well as cola or hot chocolate, should be avoided as they make you need to wee more.

3. Bladder training involves establishing a regular toilet routine, enabling the bladder to stretch and learn to hold onto the urine produced in the night. A vibrating watch alarm can help with this during the day to establish fluid intake intervals and toilet stops.

4. Bedwetting alarms sense urine and wake children so they can use the toilet.

5. Cover the mattress with plastic to ease the frustration of the clean-up.

6. And, as a last resort, medication. This is usually prescribed after the age of seven. Desmopressin is an artificial form of the hormone, vasopressin, and is taken just before bedtime. It works by concentrating the urine produced overnight.

After three months of treatment, the drug can be stopped for a week to see if bedwetting has resolved.

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2016/12/19 10:31 PM

FEATURE

Time to see a

lactation consultant?

By Carey Haupt RD(SA)

We introduce you to three lactation consultants and explain how they can help you to breastfeed your baby.

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ou’ve done your research and you know the benefits of breastfeeding. Together, you and your partner decided you were going to breastfeed. He has been great – helping at the hospital and bringing you your baby whenever she needed a feed. He has googled and researched how to latch better, but even he is now asking if this is worth continuing. You can see he is hesitant and not sure if he wants you to continue because he can see how much pain you are in. Maybe you

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are beginning to feel that you have failed in some way, and that you could be a better mom if you can just get this right.

You need to stop and realise that you are not the only family having difficulties. There are other mothers that battle with painful nipples, who worry about not having enough milk and how to get a pain-free latch, or are not sure who to listen to for help. If you have any of these thoughts or difficulties, maybe it is time to see a lactation consultant. www.babysandbeyond.co.za

2016/12/19 10:32 PM

FEATURE A lactation consultant can walk your breastfeeding journey with you. She is able to help you and answer questions, such as: ‘Can I make enough milk for my baby? Do I have Mastitis? Does my baby really have a tongue tie, or how am I going to express enough milk when I go back to work?’ Her goal is to help you and your family reach your breastfeeding goal – whether this is to breastfeed for the first month or three years.

Lactation consultants specialise in the clinical management of breastfeeding and are often medical professionals. Some also become lactation consultants through a clinical mentorship programme without being a medical professional. As a result, there will be a lactation consultant that will fit your needs and understand your path.

In South Africa there are two types of certified Lactation Consultants: the International Board Certified Lactation Consultant and the South African Certified Lactation Consultant. Both write an exam on breastfeeding management, undergo supervised practical management with mothers, complete specific educational topics, and participate in ongoing breastfeeding education. They have a passion for helping mothers to breastfeed and they have many hours of experience behind them to help you with your specific situation.

In South Africa, there are some 45 Certified Lactation Consultants – we’d like to introduce you to three.

Lizelle Payne Lizelle Payne is a dietitian who qualified as a SACLC and works with moms in her community. Working in the public sector for over 10 years, Lizelle realised that mothers need technical help with breastfeeding, not just positive breastfeeding slogans. She studied to become a certified lactation consultant and now breastfeeding support is one of the main aspects in her private practice. She believes that breastfeeding is an art and science, and that she is able to help mothers connect the two to help the mom reach her breastfeeding goal.

Her key advice is: ‘Breastfeeding is the most natural thing in the world but it may not come naturally. Just as we need help educating our children, we may also need help feeding them.’

One of the moms in Lizelle’s practice had a perfect pregnancy until she reached 34 weeks. She contracted a life-threatening bacterium and had to deliver her baby via an emergency C-section. Her baby received donor breastmilk while she as being treated but this mom decided as soon as she could she would start breastfeeding her baby. This was no easy road but Lizelle helped and supported her to express milk. One day, Lizelle received a phone call from the very tearful mom who had spilt 150ml of

A lactation consultant can walk your breastfeeding journey with you.” www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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expressed breast milk and was devastated. Lizelle says that they had developed such a strong bond that she also became tearful as she knew how hard this mom worked to express for her baby.

Laura Sayce Laura Sayce became an IBCLC by first being part of the La Leche League and running a support group for moms. She has helped moms with a variety of problems and realised that many moms may give up on breastfeeding before they receive the help they need. She would like mothers to know that even though breastfeeding may come with challenges, there is help out there. Your body is amazing – it grew your baby for nine months and is also able to make enough milk for the next two years or longer.

She fondly remembers a very dedicated mom who had a flat and cracked nipple but refused to give up on breastfeeding. She only had one breast as she had lost the other one to cancer. She really wanted to have an enjoyable breastfeeding relationship with her baby and, with the care and support form Laura, this mom is still breastfeeding more than a year later.

As part of Laura’s care for moms, she offers home visits for breastfeeding-related issues, pregnancy classes for couples, and offers a support group for breastfeeding moms.

Lara Torlage Lara Torlage is a nursing sister with an oncology background who knows the effects of little or no breastfeeding support in her community. As a firsttime mom without any close family members that were able to help her with her own breastfeeding journey, and with her own lack of knowledge at the time, Lara did not have a successful breast feeding experience.

However, years later Lara has become a certified lactation consultant (SACLC) and runs a well-baby clinic. With hindsight, she acknowledges that she was on the correct path to feeding her son but her lack of knowledge cost her dearly. Her goal is to help mothers in her clinic to not have the same regrets as she does.

Mostly, Lara would like to change the South African culture around infant feeding from a formula-driven one to one that allows mothers and families to experience the wonders of breastfeeding.

She believes that this can happen with correct breastfeeding education and exposing mothers to a breastfeeding culture. The first few weeks of breastfeeding can be very difficult and a lactation consultant can help moms develop the skills they need.

Lara provides multifaceted breastfeeding support, from antenatal and breastfeeding preparation classes, lactation consults, and breastfeeding support groups to an immunisation clinic.

You can find a Certified Lactation Consultant by looking for the abbreviations after their names – IBCLC or SACLC. South Africa’s lactation consultant association is LACSA. For more information, visit www.lacsa.co.za. La Leche League of South Africa is another wonderful resourceful voluntary organisation that provides breastfeeding support. For more information, visit www.llli.org/southafrica.html.

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2016/12/20 10:06 PM

FEATURE

Planning a

baby shower

Baby showers are all about spoiling mom with love and affection and helping her to prepare for her baby’s arrival. Emma Dawson provides a few pointers for planning a memorable event.

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hether the baby shower is a surprise or the mom knows when it’s happening, the aim is to ensure that as many of the special people in her life are able to attend as possible. If you’re planning a surprise, book the mom-to-be for a pamper session or brunch, for example, to ensure she’s available for the party.

Compile a list of the people the mom-to-be would like invited. This will be harder if the party is a secret, but ask friends to forward email addresses of others in their circles that you may not know. If VIP guest knows about the party, ask her for friends’ contact information.

A good time to host a baby shower is when the mom is about seven months pregnant. This gives her plenty of time to sort out the nursery, return duplicate gifts and buy last-minute items she may still need.

A budget, location and theme also need to be considered. The budget and location will depend on the number of guests, and it may be more cost effective to host the party at home or at a friend or family member’s house.

For your budget, consider venue hire fees, party favours, food and drinks. If you host the party at home, will you cater yourself, or will you outsource the catering? Because friends will probably be coming from different areas, consider a location that’s as central as possible.

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The days of a girls-only baby shower are gone and the new trend seems to be having both parents in attendance. Whether just girls or the guys too, pick a theme that suits the parents-to-be or the nursery’s theme.

Your invites should go out about six weeks in advance and should follow the theme of the party. If there’s a gift registry, be sure to include this information with the invitation.

If your shower is on a budget and being held at home, ask guests to bring a plate and bottle. Finger food is good and you can split sweet and savoury options between the guests for a good spread. If you’re doing the catering yourself, try to make food that you can prepare in advance so that you’re not stuck in the kitchen when you should be hosting the party.

Don’t forget to plan your table decorations, order your party favours, and decide on the party games.

Flowers should be booked in advance and, if you’ve made a reservation at a venue, don’t forget to confirm it.

Part and parcel of hosting a memorable event for the parents-to-be are photos of the special day. You will probably be busy tending to guests, so delegate this job to someone who’s a good photographer, or hire a professional.

www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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2016/12/19 10:37 PM

FEATURE

The perfect dance of

birth hormones

‘The Perfect Dance of Birth Hormones’ is the theme of this year’s Pregnancy Education Week (February 18 to 26) when childbirth educators, Bio-Oil, and hospitals around the country highlight how knowledge empowers expectant parents for better pregnancy, birth, bonding, and breastfeeding experiences. Childbirth education is proven to have many benefits for expectant parents and the newborn child.

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e advocate childbirth education because understanding the miraculous process of pregnancy and birth empowers parents to make informed choices,’ explains Lauren Macnab from Bio-Oil, the official partner for Pregnancy Education Week. ‘There is sound evidence that childbirth education builds confidence, reduces fear, and connects pregnant parents with one another for mutual support.’

Lynne Bluff, national co-ordinator of the Childbirth Educators’ Professional Forum, explains

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how antenatal classes can help to facilitate an understanding of the interplay of hormones before, after and during birth.

‘Our hormone system prepares us in the final weeks, days and hours for an efficient labour – they help manage the pain and stress, and ensure a safe birth. Hormones also give us a feeling of intense reward and pleasure as we meet our babies for the first time. For all this to happen in harmony, the birthing hormones need to work together in perfect synchronicity. At childbirth education classes, parents

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2016/12/19 10:37 PM

FEATURE

Childbirth education is proven to have many benefits for expectant parents and the newborn child.” learn these intricate steps. The knowledge and understanding they gain helps facilitate the “dance” for a better birth experience,’ Lynne notes.

‘Four hormones star in the show – oxytocin, endorphins, catecholamines, and prolactin.

Each brings its own style to the dance of labour.

Oxytocin takes the lead, guiding you with love and connection, while catecholamines excite and energise you. Endorphins help you navigate through the daring twists and turns, and nurturing prolactin is there at the dazzling finish to welcome your baby.’

Bluff explains several steps that expectant parents can take to best prepare for this perfect ‘dance’: 1. Most importantly, you need confidence that you can give birth to your baby so it’s important to choose a doctor or midwife who instils this confidence.

2. Learn the steps. Attend childbirth education classes and learn how the body functions so that you fully understand labour.

3. Exercise will prepare your body for labour and generates higher levels of endorphins that will lead to a shorter, less painful birth. Eating a healthy balanced diet will nourish mother and baby without excessive weight gain. Massaging oil into your growing body is soothing, and helps prepare the skin for rapid expansion, helping to prevent stretch marks.

4. Practice coping strategies such as visualisations, affirmations and massage. Use these during labour and also stand and move – movement and upright posture enhance endorphin release.

5. Give birth in a safe, private and relaxed atmosphere. A calm, supportive environment prevents labour being slowed down by the wrong hormones interacting.

6. Recruit a birth support team – whether it’s your partner, a doula, friend or mother. There are wide-reaching physical and emotional benefits to having loving support during the birth.

7. Allow birth to begin in its own time. When labour begins naturally, both mother and baby have the optimal number of receptors needed for birth hormones to best facilitate birth.

8. Skin to skin contact immediately after birth allows your baby to go through the nine instinctive stages naturally, and increases oxytocin levels for mom and baby, which supports breastfeeding success and enhances maternal-infant bonding. www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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The four main birthing hormones • Oxytocin – the love hormone • Endorphins – the pain-relieving hormone • Catecholamines – the stress, fight or flight, hormones • Prolactin – the mothering hormone that facilitates breastfeeding

Six good reasons to attend childbirth education classes 1. Expertise – Educators are experienced nursing sisters and midwives who have chosen to specialise in childbirth education because they passionately believe in it.

2. Knowledge – You learn about all the childbirth options available to you, and the pros and cons of each.

3. Tools – You’ll be given practical tips and techniques, such as breathing, relaxation, positions, massage and visualisation that can help you have an easier birth.

4. Confidence – You and your partner will feel more confident knowing what to expect and how to manage it.

5. Preparation – You’ll be taught about all aspects of pregnancy and birth, from stretch marks to caring for your newborn baby.

6. Connections – You’ll meet other expectant parents from your area. Lifelong friendships can be formed.

Facts and figures • There are in the region of 1.2-million births in South Africa each year.

• Between 100 000 to 120 000 births in South Africa are in the private sector.

• The Caesarean section rate within the private sector in South Africa has risen above the 70% mark.

• Over 280 private hospitals and clinics around the country are running special Pregnancy Education Week activities supported by Bio-Oil.

‘Birth is like a dance. Knowing the steps allows you to relax and accept the sensations, feel the rhythm, and confidently move to labour’s natural beat for a beautiful birth experience,’ Lynne insists.

To find a childbirth educator in your area and for more information on Pregnancy Education Week, visit www.expectantmothersguide.co.za, www.facebook.com/ExpectantMothersGuideZA, or #PregnancyEducationWeek.

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2016/12/19 10:38 PM

FEATURE

After divorce

– putting the comfort back into family life

By Danielle Forsyth, Educational Psychologist at Trinityhouse Heritage Hill

It’s no revelation that the breakup of your marriage is tough on your kids. It can be stressful, sad, and confusing. At any age, kids may feel uncertain or angry at the prospect of mom and dad splitting up. Yet, as a parent, you can make the process and its effects less painful for your children.

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elping your kids to cope with divorce means providing stability in your home and attending to your children’s needs with a reassuring, positive attitude. It won’t be a seamless process, but let’s discuss how to lend comfort, not confusion, to an already difficult situation.

There are many ways you can help your kids adjust to separation or divorce. Your patience, reassurance, and a listening ear can minimise tension as children

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learn to cope with new circumstances. By providing routines kids can rely on, you remind children they can count on you for stability, structure, and care.

And if you can maintain a working relationship with your ex, you can help kids avoid the stress that comes with watching parents in conflict. Such a transitional time can’t be without some measure of hardship, but you can powerfully reduce your children’s pain by making their well-being your top priority. www.babysandbeyond.co.za

2016/12/19 10:38 PM

FEATURE What to tell your children When it comes to telling your kids about your divorce, many parents freeze up. Minimise stress on both yourselves and your children by preparing before having this discussion. Be mindful of possible tough questions by dealing with your own anxieties ahead of time, and carefully plan what you will say so that you feel better equipped to support them in handling the news.

As challenging as it may seem, try to strike an empathetic tone and address the important points right up front. Give your children the benefit of an honest yet kid-friendly explanation.

Ensure you always tell the truth, as they are entitled to know why the divorce is happening. Using simple and honest explanations means less confusion.

You may need to remind them that while parents and kids don’t always get along, they never stop loving each other or get divorced from each other.

Always emphasise that they are loved, and mean it. However simple it may sound, knowing the facts still sends out a very powerful and heartwarming message.

Pre-empt their questions about change by acknowledging that some things will change but that others won’t. Tell them that together you will deal with each detail as you go.

Furthermore, it is essential to be honest with your children without prejudicing your spouse. This often poses a challenge, especially when there have been hurtful events, such as infidelity. But with a little diplomacy you can avoid the blame game.

Present as a united front by agreeing on explanations and sticking to them. Make plans to talk to your children before any changes may occur, preferably when your spouse can be present. Show restraint and be respectful of your spouse when giving reasons for the separation.

Listen and offer reassurance Support your children by helping them to express emotions, and commit to truly listening to these feelings without getting defensive. Your next job is providing reassurance, appeasing fears, straightening confusions, and showing your unconditional love.

The bottom line is that kids need to know that your divorce isn’t their fault.

For kids, divorce can feel like a loss. Help your children grieve and adjust to new circumstances by supporting their feelings. Listening and encouraging them to share their feelings allows passage for feelings of sadness, loss or frustration about things you may not have expected. With the acknowledgment of their feelings comes the development of a relationship based on trust and understanding. You may not be able to fix their problems or change their sadness to happiness, but it is important that you do not dismiss them. Expressing feelings is no easy task, but try to identify their needs and frustrations through their moods and talking. Sharing this openness with them encourages honest expression of feelings, even if they may hurt you personally. If they aren’t able to honestly share their feelings, they will have a harder time working through them. www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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Many kids believe that they had something to do with the divorce, recalling times they argued with their parents, received poor grades, or got into trouble. You can help your kids let go of this misconception by setting the record straight by discussing the real reasons for your decision. Treat your children’s confusion or misunderstanding with patience and reassure them that they are not the cause of your divorce, and that you will continue to love and care for them no matter what.

Children have a remarkable ability to heal when given the support and love they need. Your words, actions, and ability to remain consistent are allimportant tools to reassure your children of your unchanging love.

Even though the physical circumstances of the family unit has changed, they can continue to have a healthy loving relationship with both parents. Let them know that it won’t always be easy, but that it will be okay. This then provides incentive for your children to give the new arrangement a chance.

Offering physical closeness – in the form of hugs, pats on the shoulder, or simple proximity – has a powerful way of reassuring your child of your love.

When kids raise concerns or anxieties, respond truthfully. If you don’t know the answer, say gently that you aren’t sure right now, but you’ll find out and it will be okay.

When kids raise concerns or anxieties, respond truthfully.”

Provide stability and structure While it’s good for kids to learn to be flexible, adjusting to many new things at once can be very difficult. Help your kids to adjust to change by providing as much stability and structure as possible in their daily lives.

Remember that establishing structure and continuity doesn’t mean that you need rigid schedules or that mom and dad’s routines need to be the same. But creating some regular routines at each household and consistently communicating to your children what to expect will provide your kids with a sense of calm and stability.

The benefit of schedules and organisation for younger children is widely recognised, but many people don’t realise that older children also appreciate routine. Kids feel safer and more secure when they know what to expect next. Knowing that even when they switch homes, dinnertime is followed by a bath and then homework, for example, can put a child’s mind at ease.

Maintaining routine also means continuing to observe rules, rewards, and discipline with your children. Resist the temptation to spoil kids during a divorce by not enforcing limits or allowing them to break rules.

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FEATURE Care for yourself The first safety instruction for an airplane emergency is to put the oxygen mask on yourself before you put it on your child. The take-home message: take care of yourself so that you can be there for your kids.

If you are able to be calm and emotionally present, your kids will feel more at ease. The following are steps you can take toward improving your own wellbeing and outlook: • Exercise often and eat a healthy diet. Exercise relieves the pent-up stress and frustration that are commonplace with divorce. And, although cooking for one can be difficult, eating healthily will make you feel better, inside and out, so skip the fast food.

• See friends often. It may be tempting to hole up and not see friends and family who will inevitably ask about the divorce. However, the reality is that you need the distraction. Ask friends to avoid the topic – they’ll understand. Talk to friends or a support group about your bitterness, anger, frustration (or whatever the feeling may be) so you don’t take it out on your kids.

• Keep a journal. Writing down your feelings, thoughts, and moods can help you release tension, sadness, and anger. As time passes, you can look back on just how far you’ve come.

• At the very least, divorce is complicated and stressful, and can be devastating without support.

Never vent negative feelings to your child.

Whatever you do, do not use your child to talk it out like you would with a friend.

• Keep laughing. Try to inject humour and play into your life and the lives of your children as much as you can. It can relieve stress and give you all a break from sadness and anger.

• See a therapist if you have feeling of intense anger, fear, grief, shame, or guilt to help you work through those feelings.

Work with your ex Conflict between parents – separated or not – can be very damaging for kids. It’s crucial to avoid putting your children in the middle of your fights, or making them feel like they have to choose between you.

Remember that your goal is to avoid lasting stress and pain for your children, so use tact, be nice, and focus on everyone’s strengths and well-being.

It’s the oldest rule in the book: If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. So be

You can powerfully reduce your children’s pain by making their well-being your top priority.” polite in your interactions with your ex-spouse. This sets an example for your kids and will cause your ex to be gracious in response.

Make it a priority to develop an amicable relationship with your ex-spouse as soon as possible, especially when it comes to rules and discipline.

Watching you be friendly can reassure children and teach effective problem-solving skills.

If you can keep long-term goals – your children’s physical and mental health and your independence – in mind, you may be able to avoid disagreements about daily details. Think ahead to stay calm.

Know when to seek help Some children go through divorce with relatively few problems, while others have a very difficult time. It’s normal for kids to feel a range of difficult emotions, but time, love, and reassurance should help them to heal. If your kids remain overwhelmed, you may need to seek professional help.

If things get worse rather than better after several months, it may be a sign that your child is stuck in depression, anxiety, or anger and could use some additional support. Watch for the warning signs of divorce-related depression or anxiety: 1. Sleep problems 2. Poor concentration 3. Trouble at school 4. Drug or alcohol abuse 5. Self-injury, cutting, or eating disorders 6. Frequent angry or violent outbursts 7. Withdrawal from loved ones 8. Refusal of loved activities Discuss these or other divorce-related warning-signs with your child’s doctor, teachers, or consult a child therapist for guidance on how best to cope with these specific problems.

ADvTECH Schools Division, www.advtech.co.za.

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2016/12/19 10:39 PM

FEATURE

Preparing children for

medical interventions

By Dr Karen van Zijl, Child Life Specialist and Play Therapist

We all have them … those dreaded memories of some form of medical procedure that still sends shivers down our spines. For some, it’s the thought of an injection, for others it’s a trip to the dentist …

V

isits to the doctor or dentist can be very stressful for children for many reasons; the medical world is like an alternate universe where all the rules of social engagement change. People dress funny, they use strange words and terms, they touch me without asking, and even Mommy and Daddy seem scared of these strange people. It is no wonder that children feel threatened by this unfamiliar environment with its strange smells and sounds. But it does not have to be that way, we can minimise the negative associations of visits to the GP, dentist or even the hospital.

Research proves that children who are prepared for healthcare experiences in a manner that is developmentally appropriate, show more positive outcomes in their behaviour, recovery, and their ability to cope with stressful events (Thompson, 2009).

The goal with preparation for medical procedures is to give the child a sense of control and predictability in the unknown environment with the least amount of distress as possible.

As parents, you know your child the best and therefore play a pivotal role in preparing your child for medical procedures. Here are some suggestions on how to go about this:

Be prepared If at all possible, visit the doctor’s office, dentist or hospital a few days before the scheduled procedure.

Explain to your child that this is where you will be coming. Go in and meet the receptionist and, if at all possible, the doctor or dentist. This will help your child to feel more comfortable on the day of the planned intervention because she will be more familiar with the surroundings. Talk about what the room looks like,

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what she can hear, smell and feel. You can even take photographs of your child in the room with the medical personnel to view afterwards.

Know the facts Get the basic facts from your healthcare professional. The more information you have about what to expect, the calmer you will be. Ask about the why, what, who, where, and when of the planned procedure. Then you can convey that information to your child in a way that she understands. Give lots of sensory information. Children learn through their senses so they need information about what it will smell like, what they will hear, feel and see. Will there be other people there? What will they look like? They will also need information regarding the sequence in which the interventions will take place.

Use simple language When explaining medical interventions to our children it is very important to use language that they understand. Children are concrete in their understanding, so when we say something like: ‘The nurse will draw your blood’, they might think ‘draw a picture of my blood with pencils’. We should rather say: ‘The nurse will make a very small opening and take a bit of your blood in a tube so that the doctor can find out what your body needs to get better’.

Words such as ‘shot’ for an injection may scare children because it might bring images of a shot gun to mind. Rather say: ‘They are going to put the medicine under your skin’. www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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FEATURE

About the Organisation for Paediatric Support in South Africa (OPSSA) Hospitalisation and other healthcare experiences can be very distressing and traumatising for children. During healthcare interventions children are subjected to an environment that they do not understand, nor have any control over. They are faced with many unfamiliar sights, sounds and smells, and they have to undergo frightening and often painful procedures.

Across the world there are various organisations that promote the psychosocial support of children in healthcare. The Organisation for Paediatric Support in South Africa (OPSSA) is a non-profit, public-benefit organisation that strives to promote local paediatric psychosocial support.

OPSSA’s objectives are to empower children and their families in all areas of the healthcare system and to promote quality healthcare for children in South Africa in both the private and public healthcare sectors. To do this, OPSSA liaises with the National Department of Health to advocate for child-friendly healthcare in South Africa, educates healthcare professionals, provides instrumental support, such as the availability of devices (for example, distraction items and devices to reduce pain during procedures), as well as training in the paediatric healthcare sector.

OPSSA provides and supports actions that can be confirmed by scientific evidence to have value towards empowering children in the healthcare sector.

For more information, visit www.opssa.org.za.

Use pictures

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Dr Karen van Zijl is a Certified Child Life Specialist and Play Therapist. She is also the president and co-founder of an NPO – The Organisation for Paediatric Support in South Africa (OPSSA). Karen completed her P.hD. in Educational Psychology with a CANSA scholarship in 2016. She received her Masters degree in Play therapy in 2009, and was the first South African to become a Certified Child Life Specialist in 2014.

She completed her Child Life academic training and internship in Canada at the University of the Fraser Valley, as well as BC Children’s hospital in Vancouver. Karen has worked with paediatric patients since 2005 in hospital settings and in private practice.

Photo credit: Karen van Zijl

Before interventions such as X-rays, ultrasound, a CT scan or an MRI scan, you can have a look online to find photographs to show your child what the machine looks like. Your child will also like to know whether the machine will touch her or not. If she is having a sonar, explain that there will be gel on her skin that will feel cold and slippery. Give as much sensory information as possible. It is very important to give a little bit of information at a time and then check what your child understood to prevent misconceptions.

There are apps that you can download that will help your child to prepare for medical interventions such as X-rays, CT and MRI scans. For example, there is an app called OKEE in Medical Imaging.

Developed by The Royal Children’s Hospital in Melbourne in Australia, this free app for IOS or Android provides games and short video clips for

various procedures, and explains the equipment that will be used, what it looks, how it works, and the sounds it makes.

To summarise – before any medical intervention you can do the following: • Explain that the medical personnel are there to help her • Help her understand what will happen and why • After you have explained what is going to happen, ask her to explain it back to you to ensure there are no misconceptions.

Part of preparing your child is the implementation of coping skills. Before the planned medical intervention, suggest things that can help her to cope, such as listening to music, blowing bubbles, reading a book, or playing a game while the procedure is done. This way her attention is diverted away from the medical procedure. Help her to pack a distraction bag for the day of the planned intervention. The bag’s contents can include a comfort toy or blanket, a book she loves, some bubbles that she can blow, a balloon she can blow up while waiting – this encourages deep breathing that will calm her down. You can also pack some games that will hold her interest and distract her during the procedure.

After the medical intervention, help her to express her experiences, thoughts and feelings through play.

You can: • Provide the opportunity for her to play with pretend medical equipment, puppets and dolls.

• Pretend to be the patient while she is the doctor or dentist. Ask her what is happening and what you should do as the patient.

• While playing, listen for any fears, concerns or misconceptions that she might have. Within the play you can give information or clarify these misconceptions.

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FEATURE

Look who’s

talking

By Rene Brummage, MD, Mothers and Miracles

Hearing your baby’s first word is probably one of the most anticipated and exciting of all her milestones and, while all babies develop at their own pace, you can expect the babble that you’ve been hearing to transform into ‘ma-ma’ or ‘da-da’ between eight and nine months old.

L

anguage development is life changing for you and for your baby, and the start of a miraculous journey of communication, bonding, learning and sharing that will last a lifetime.

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FEATURE Engage in a meaningful way Your baby will be eager to learn from you. Use every opportunity to use rich, descriptive language to describe what you’re doing throughout the day. Be sure to respond to your baby’s attempts at communicating with you. Point to objects and name them. Ask questions. Make eye contact during conversations, and repeat yourself – babies learn through repetition. Talk slowly and clearly, and avoid baby talk.

Typical language skills From birth to six months, your baby will: • Communicate (cry) when hungry, tired or experiencing discomfort (wet nappy) • Make noises to express satisfaction or displeasure • General cooing and babbling To nurture your baby’s language skills: • Converse with your baby at every opportunity using descriptive and expressive language • Sing songs • Read to your baby From six to 12 months, you baby will: • Wave goodbye • Respond to her name • Understand names of familiar objects • Show interest in picture books • May say her first word • Pay attention to conversation • Chatter expressively as if in conversation To nurture these skills: • Teach your baby her name, other family member’s names, pet’s names, and familiar objects in her environment • Talk to her about what you’re doing: ‘I’m cooking pasta’, ‘I’m making tea’, ‘I’m feeding Spot’, ‘the carrot is orange’, ‘listen to the rain’ • Use expressive language • Read books with your baby From 12 to 18 months, your baby will: • Identify family members and familiar objects • Point to a few body parts • Follow simple (one-step) instructions • Say two or more words • Imitate familiar noises (birds, bark) • Look at the person who is talking • Point and ask for something • Identify an object in a picture book

Language development is life changing for you and for your baby.”

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Use every opportunity to use rich, descriptive language to describe what you’re doing throughout the day.”

• Use expressions such as ‘oh-oh’ • Says ‘hi’ or ‘bye’ if reminded To nurture these skills: • Teach your child the names of people and items in her environment • Make the sounds that different things make • Read books with and to your baby • Make a scrap book with bright pictures of familiar objects • Use descriptive words, speak clearly, avoid ‘baby talk’ From 18 to 24 months, your child will: • Have a vocabulary of about 50 words but understand many more • Echo single words spoken by somebody else • Talk to herself and jabber expressively • Say names of toys and familiar objects • Use two to three word sentences • Sing simple songs • Listen to short rhymes • Use words such as ‘bye-bye’, ‘hi’, ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ when prompted To nurture these skills: • Reading should be a well-established daily routine • Encourage your toddler to repeat short sentences • Give simple instructions for your child to follow • Introduce rhymes with actions • Use expressive and descriptive language From 24 to 36 months your toddler will: • Probably identify up to 10 objects in a picture • Use simple phrases and sentences • Respond when called by name • Respond to simple directions • Probably use plural and past tense words • Enjoy simple stories, rhymes, and songs • Use two to three word sentences • Point to eyes, ears or nose when asked • Repeat words spoken by someone else • Expand vocabulary up to 500 words To nurture these skills: • Use expressive and descriptive language during conversation with your toddler • Continue your daily ritual of reading to and with your toddler • Teach your child simple songs and nursery rhymes.

For more information, visit Mothers and Miracles at www.mothersandmiracles.co.za.

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FEATURE

Q&A with Sister Lilian Parenting and Pampers Institute expert, Sister Lilian, answers some mother’s questions about breastfeeding and immunisation.

Q: My baby is a month old and he’s constantly crying. I’m not sure what the problem is. My friends and family say the cause may be that he’s not full.

How can I tell if my baby is getting enough breast milk?

Lerato, Bryanston A: This is a very common concern of breastfeeding moms. However, it is more likely that your anxiety about this is being carried over to your baby, rather than that you don’t have enough milk. Remember, babies reflect their moms’ emotions.

Small babies need very little milk at any one feed – they are designed to drink little bits often as part of their best survival strategy. Don’t time your baby at the breast, and don’t schedule feeds – simply go with your baby’s hunger cues – (restless behaviour, turning his head from side-to-side looking for your breast, and starting to breathe faster are early signs that his little tummy needs another nursing injection. If your baby has at least five to six wet nappies (including the soiled ones) a day and is growing steadily, this is proof that quantity is not the problem. Believe in your body, your baby, and your breasts, and that confidence will carry over to your baby.

Q: I’m a working mom and am soon going back to work. I’ve been breastfeeding my baby and I’m worried that I have to wean him off breast milk.

What are your thought on breast milk and formula?

LM, Berea

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A: It can be a challenge to wean a breastfed baby onto a bottle, and he’ll probably put up quite a fight regardless of whether it’s formula or breast milk in the bottle. However, going back to work doesn’t necessarily mean the end of breastfeeding.

It’s possible to work half days and still breastfeed your baby exclusively from when he’s five months old, switching to working full days from eight to ten months old because then you’ll be able to get by on supplementing breast milk with solids and the occasional healthy drink for thirst. However, most moms go back to work fulltime sooner than this but it still doesn’t mean that it’s bye-bye breast. Start building up a ‘bank’ of your milk now and store it in the freezer; negotiate to be able to feed your baby once or twice during your work day (after all, the law is on your side about this matter), and make peace with feeding your baby more often at night.

However, if your circumstances make this difficult, here are some weaning tips to help you introduce partial formula feeding (the next best thing to exclusive breastfeeding): • Start the weaning process two or three weeks before you go back to work – be careful not to wean baby too far ahead of time though, as the longer he’s able to breastfeed the better.

• Persevere – your baby will eventually give in to hunger and accept a bottle.

• Don’t worry if you’re dual bottle and breastfeeding and your baby refuses all feeds during the day; you’ll be able to make this up at night. www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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FEATURE • Be patient – your baby should settle and become used to the bottle within a week or two.

• Cradle your baby close when you bottle feed him and give him lots of emotional care – feeding is just as much about nurturing as it is about nutrients.

• Don’t try to stick to a feeding schedule; just let your baby feed when and for as long as he wants to – this often takes the form of smaller feeds more often.

• Let someone else bottle feed your baby during the weaning process if he won’t take a bottle from you.

• Consider a feeding cup if your baby rejects a bottle – this can be slower and a bit messier though.

Q: I’m pregnant and reading a lot of books and magazines on pregnancy and babies. None that I have read answer the most important question – how long should I breastfeed for?

Confused, Free State A: Babies are physiologically designed to breastfeed for at least two to three years. That’s the short, true answer. Before you think ‘oh, no’, take this into account: As your baby grows, feeds become quicker, shorter, and further apart, and so nursing doesn’t remain a constant activity for all of those years. It requires a lot from moms in the early months (though it gives just as many rewards if you will just allow it to unfold naturally). However, from five months onwards, it becomes a piece of cake in almost all experiences.

By one year, babies often don’t suckle much during the day and this pattern continues for the rest of the nursing experience. The happy, healthy baby you will have will also save you lots of time.

Q: Please advise how soon my baby will get her vaccinations?

Anonymous, email

Q: In the first year, what foods should I give to and avoid for my baby?

Ashley, Randburg A: Breast milk is the best food for the first six months of life (or even if your baby is on formula, solids should preferably not be introduced before this time). The very best guidelines for introducing other food is to take it simply and slowly. Be led by your baby’s palate and preferences, and to only ever

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Q: Is it true that babies have nipple confusion when given both bottle and breast?

A: Yes, this does often happen, although sometimes it is really more about the mom’s confusion. If you don’t feel sure of your ability to breastfeed your baby, and you constantly question yourself and give top-ups just to feel sure that your baby has had enough, you can instil insecurity in your little one that will become a trigger for a vicious cycle.

Sucking a breast and bottle teat is also vastly different, and of course mother’s milk and formula milk are two totally different things – there’s lots of potential to complicate a baby’s simultaneously very sophisticated and very straightforward nutritional physiology. Mixed messages are never the best messages – just as mixed feeding is never best. You and your baby are built for breastfeeding – go for it because you will forever reap the benefits.

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For more information, visit www.pampers.co.za.

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A: You will be given an immunisation card when you are discharged after the birth of your baby, or at your first clinic visit. This will stipulate the recommended times for each vaccination. The schedule changes from time to time, but the basic programme is as follows: • At birth – Polio, BCG (TB vaccine) • 6 weeks – Polio, DTP (Diptheria, whooping cough, tetanus), Hib (HaemophilusInfl B), Hepatitis B • 10 weeks – Polio, DTP, Hib, Hepatitis B • 14 weeks – Polio, DTP, Hib, Hepatitis B • 9 months – Measles vaccine • 18 months – Measles vaccine, DTP, Polio • 5 years – Polio, DT (Diptheria, tetanus)

offer healthy foods in the first year (and preferably longer). Ripe, seasonal fruits and veggie-fruits (marrows and squashes) are the best first foods for most as they are best tolerated, easily digested, and least likely to cause allergies. Baby cereals often cause constipation, bloating, mucus, and skin rashes, and it is better to introduce them after ten or twelve months. Some babies will never react well to processed cereals. When your baby starts grasping for food and can manoeuvre a finger of medium soft pear or mango to his mouth, or picks up a round of lightly-steamed carrot, or dips his finger into your avocado, then you know he really is ready to eat foods – that’ll often be when he already has a few teeth. Babies are a lot like adults – their taste buds vary, so don’t make the common mistake of thinking that one approach fits all.

Parenting and Pampers Institute expert, Sister Lilian.

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HEALTH

Effective

asthma treatment

for children

By AndrĂŠ van Niekerk, Paediatric Pulmonologist, Department of Pediatrics and Child Health, University of Pretoria, and private practice

Photo credit: Aspen Pharma

Inhaled controller and reliever medications are used to treat asthmatic children of all ages. However, while aerosol medication is tricky to use and does not offer any benefit if used incorrectly, spacer devices make administration simple and effective.

A tight-fitting mask should be added to a spacer device for children who are younger than three to four years old, and a spacer without a mask should be used in older children.

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HEALTH

A

sthma is one of various causes of a wheezy chest, or chest tightness in children. It often begins in early life and is a common chronic childhood disease that may result in reduced quality of life, hospital admission, and even more serious complications.

Many children will outgrow their asthma over time but asthma cannot be cured. It must be well managed to improve quality of life and to avoid complications.

Modern asthma medication is very effective and offers excellent control when the diagnosis of asthma is correct, and when parents are confident of comprehensive management.

The correct diagnosis of asthma relies on ‘objective proof of episodes of variable airflow limitation’ through the airways of the lungs. Your doctor will look for objective evidence of episodes where the airflow is reduced and that can be improved with the administration of an inhaled bronchodilator. This can be easily done with lung function tests in older children, but may be more difficult to confirm in younger children.

Treatment The effective management of asthma includes a comprehensive management approach.

This approach addresses the identification, and appropriate avoidance of asthma triggers, treatment for other conditions that may interfere with asthma control, regular follow-up visits to monitor control, good education, and the correct prescription of controller and reliever medications.

Controller medications must be taken on a daily basis. They prevent asthma symptoms and asthma attacks. Reliever medication only assists with improved airflow during asthma attacks and must only be used when symptoms are present.

Controller and reliever medications are available as aerosols for inhalation. Inhaled medications can be used in children of all ages. They are more effective and offer less side effects than medications in syrup formulations. The only problem with aerosol medication is that it can be tricky to use, and does not offer any benefit if used incorrectly.

Common devices Effective inhaled treatment relies on medicine molecules that are ‘packed’ into aerosol droplets that must be inhaled as deeply as possible down into the small airways of the lungs. Different devices are used to create these aerosols. The more commonly used devices include nebuliser machines, asthma pumps (pressurised metered dose inhalers), and inhalers that generate fine dry powder particles.

While nebuliser machines are very popular, they are unfortunately not very effective in the treatment of chronic asthma and should rather not be used.

The medication used in nebuliser machines is more expensive, takes longer to administer, more goes to waste, and there are technical reasons why they often fail to deliver effective inhaled treatment.

Additionally, nebulisers generally produce bigger aerosol droplets that cannot travel all the way down into the smaller airways effectively.

The asthma pumps (or pressurised metered dose inhalers) offer smaller and more favourable droplets

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Spacer devices slow down the aerosol plume to afford the child enough time to inhale the aerosol effectively.”

to reach the smaller airways. They are also cheaper and quicker to use. Asthma pumps are the delivery devices of choice in young children but these unfortunately release their aerosol droplets at a higher speed. This is a big disadvantage. The aerosol plume collides with the child’s palette and throat if it is simply squirted directly into the mouth. A skilled older child may be able to use an asthma pump effectively but we should assume that most children will not be able to use them effectively if we do not also attach a holding chamber, or ‘spacer device’, to the asthma pump.

Spacer devices Spacer devices are specifically designed to slow down the aerosol plume of the asthma pump to afford the child enough time to inhale the aerosol effectively. Not all of these spacer devices are the same. They vary in size and some are made of plastic while others have a metal lining on the inside. The disadvantage of plastic spacers is that they may become electrostatically charged, which then traps some of the aerosol droplets inside the spacer. A metal lining allows more effective delivery of the aerosol as it is not static and keeps the aerosol available for longer to be inhaled. Spacers also come with different types of valves and masks. A tight-fitting mask should be used for children who are younger than three to four years old, and a spacer without a mask should be used for older children. Your doctor should choose the most appropriate holding chamber and parents should maintain and use them according to the manufacturer’s instructions.

The dry powder inhalers are generally effective and do not need a spacer device. However, they cannot be used for children younger than five to six years old.

The most effective asthma controller medication will almost always contain a corticosteroid. The modern asthma corticosteroids are very safe, and very effective when we use them as inhaled medication. We can advance their safety and efficacy even further by simply keeping to the correct dosing, administering them with an asthma pump and attached spacer, and by rinsing the mouth after inhalation.

Care-givers and patients should always be well educated in all aspects of their management and the correct use of their asthma inhalers and spacers. www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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HEALTH

Getting to the root cause of

tooth decay

By Dr Gerald B Kaplan, Prosthodontist at Dr Gerald B Kaplan

Unlike diapers, they are free and designed to last through childhood and into early adolescence. Even though they’re replaced by permanent teeth as your child grows, baby teeth are important.

T

here are 20 baby teeth followed by 32 permanent teeth. All 20 baby teeth are replaced by permanent teeth in an amazing sequence of growth and development.

At birth, there are usually no teeth, which only begin to cut from between four to six months, and sometimes even later. In fact, the later they appear the more resistant the teeth will be to dental decay.

Teething

When a teething child becomes niggly, possibly also running a fever, massaging the gums with

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wet gauze or cotton wool may help. While this is a stressful time for parents, it’s also exciting to see new teeth breaking through the gums – usually the two lower front teeth followed by the two upper front teeth. Don’t be alarmed if you see a space between the two upper front teeth. This is a good thing. It may obviate the need for orthodontic treatment at a later stage in life as it is holding adequate space for the permanent teeth when they appear.

The remaining baby teeth continue to appear until approximately two years old.

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HEALTH Caring for baby teeth It is imperative to look after these baby teeth with proper brushing. This should be done by a parent and not by the child as proper cleaning is required to keep teeth free of plaque.

An absolute no-no is giving a child a bottle of milk or juice at night – stick to water. Milk and juice promote rampant tooth decay and cause a condition called baby bottle syndrome. The teeth become grossly decayed and may even have to be extracted prematurely.

Also, remember not to transfer a dummy from your mouth to the child’s mouth. Dental decay is a bacterial disease that can be transmitted from parent to child.

Damage to baby teeth Mobile toddlers will fall, and sometimes injure their upper baby teeth. This can be quite alarming because of the profuse bleeding that occurs from the gums and lips. A mild knock may just traumatise the soft tissue, or even loosen the tooth slightly. This shouldn’t be of concern. However, with the passage of time the tooth may darken in colour.

If the baby tooth is completely knocked out this should also not cause concern because it will not affect the development of the permanent tooth.

I believe that sucking a dummy is just one of those things. Just let it be. It may happen that the teeth become skew but with early withdrawal of the sucking habit, the teeth will reposition themselves.

Thumb sucking is also a habit that should be broken over time and with sensitivity. Don’t force the issue.

The need to suck is probably emotional so just give lots of love and emotional support. It is easier to straighten crooked teeth then straighten an unsettled emotional problem.

It is nearly impossible to prevent children from eating sweets. However, the intake of sugar and sweets should be limited and perhaps given close to mealtimes. The idea is not to have the baby teeth exposed to the sugars over a long period of time during the day. After eating sweets, a good rinse with water is recommended.

Permanent teeth The permanent teeth begin to appear at the age of six or seven. Your child will become aware of loose front teeth, and it’s time to let the tooth fairy know that there will be a collection soon.

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The six-year-old molars are the first of the permanent back teeth to appear. Because these erupt into the mouth at such an early age, they are vulnerable to the ravages of tooth decay. So many adults present with dental problems that can be traced back to the poor care of the six-year molars.

Regular fluoride treatment and fissure sealants should be considered.

Regular dental check ups Many adults hate visiting the dentist because of an unpleasant childhood experience. Don’t let this happen to your child. Take children to the dentist from an early age just to get them used to the environment of the dental office by having a ride on the chair. The visit should be fun and your dentist can blow a gentle stream of air on your child’s face, which tickles, and may offer a sticker or other gift as a reward for their confidence and bravery.

Parents’ negative attitudes are easily conveyed to children. The whole experience should be positive and encouraging. Tooth decay is preventable with effective brushing and flossing and, as parents, you are responsible for this.

How wonderful it is to have a child leave the dental chair and exclaim, ‘Look Mom, no cavities!’

Dr Gerald B Kaplan, B.D.S. (RAND) M.S.D. (BOSTON) qualified in 1970 as a dentist at the University of Witwaterstand. He spent four years in general practice in Johannesburg before advancing his studies at the Boston University School of Graduate Dentistry (BUSGD).

He completed his studies there with a Certificate in Advanced Graduate Study and a Master of Science in Dentistry. For more information, visit, www. prosthodontist.co.za.

Photo credit: Dr Gerald Kaplan

An absolute no-no is giving a child a bottle of milk or juice at night – stick to water.”

Many adults hate visiting the dentist because of an unpleasant childhood experience.”

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HEALTH

Head trauma

in kids

By Gavin Sutton, COO, Be Safe Paramedical South Africa

Photo credit: Dawn Endico

The human brain is an absolute marvel. It allows us to rapidly respond to danger, it’s our centre of conscious and sub-consciousness, it allows us to feel empathy, love and compassion, and controls the crucial processes in our bodies that ultimately keep us alive. For these reasons and more, I rate any injury to the head at the top of the list of things that most terrifies parents.

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HEALTH

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often get calls from friends and colleagues in an absolute panic because one of their kids took a knock to the head and they are worried that there could be some serious damage. Most everyday bumps to the head are fortunately quite minor in nature. The brain is a busy bee and therefore requires the lion’s share of oxygen-rich blood 24/7. Because of this high blood flow to the brain, any bump to the head will usually swell quite dramatically. It’s usually very visual, and things that look bad don’t go down well with parents. I believe that the ‘horror factor’ parents experience when their kid is injured is a highlyevolved compensatory mechanism built into parents that allows us to better protect and care for our kids.

There has never been a doubt in my mind that our intrinsic desire to act in the best interests of our children has saved their lives more times than we know.

the layers that include a helmet, or neck and face protection. These should understandably be nonnegotiable for kids, irrespective of how ‘uncool’ they think it looks. As a dad, I’ve heard all the excuses under the sun. ‘I look like Shrek in a helmet. I look like a dork in a helmet. But I’m only skating in the driveway’. And then the best one of all, ‘Dad we live in a democracy, this is an infringement on my rights’. My response: ‘Yes, but in a healthy democracy we will always have a strong opposition and I’m opposed to you skating without a helmet’. Pow! Nothing beats experience.

As a rule, I never allowed my kids to ride a skateboard, bicycle or rollerblades without a helmet.

Simply put, no helmet no fun. End of story, no negotiations. Consider how advanced some of our kids’ ‘toys’ have become, and the speeds they can reach also seems to be increasing every year. Kid with no helmet + speed = head injury. This is a simple equation and one that I believe can save your little one from a potentially fatal head injury if you follow it as a general rule.

Photo credit: SEER Development

Meninges of brain

Protecting the brain As the numero uno organ in the human body, the brain has some impressive security features. Firstly, it is surrounded by three layers of specialised membranes called the meninges – the Pia mater, Arachnoid and Dura mater. The function of the meninges is to protect the brain and to cover the blood vessels that supply the brain with blood, nutrients and oxygen.

In addition to this, we also find cerebrospinal fluid in between the Pia mater and Arachnoid. The cerebrospinal fluid acts as a shock absorber and protects the brain from bumps and jolts.

Now, here’s a really interesting fact regarding cerebrospinal fluid; the mass of an adult brain is around 1 400g. A two-year old child’s brain is about 80% the mass of an adult brain. However, the net mass of the brain while suspended in cerebrospinal fluid is equivalent to only 28g. So, what this means is that the brain exists in a state of neutral buoyancy. This allows the brain to maintain its density without being impaired by its own mass. Is that not simply incredible?

Finally, the brain is enclosed in the very rigid skull – one of the least deformable structures found in nature. It requires around one ton of force to reduce the diameter of the skull by 1cm. This gives you an indication of just how important the brain is. The skull to me is the ultimate life insurance policy, for free.

The insurance layers I like to think of any additional layers we add ourselves to protect the brain as ‘insurance layers’. These are

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Head trauma in children Statistically, pedestrian-related motor vehicle accidents account for the highest number of paediatric head injury hospital admissions in South Africa. The peak admission age is six, more boys than girls are admitted, with the majority of admissions over weekends.

This is not a very good record at all. This is in contrast to the USA where the majority of paediatric head injuries are as a result of falls.

Head injuries can take on several forms in children and I’ll briefly touch on the most common injuries without getting too technical.

Blunt trauma to the head Blunt trauma from a fall or sporting event, resulting in no direct brain injury is probably the most common injury we see. The injury site may often swell beyond what you would expect and may become quite discoloured. The bump (egg) that forms on the scalp is called a haematoma. When an injury occurs, one of the first things to happen is an increase in blood flow to the injury site. This is a natural response and the main function is to remove damaged cells and to saturate the surrounding tissue with oxygen-rich blood. This causes swelling. This swelling can be minimised by applying an icepack wrapped in a towel to the injury site. The ice cools the area down and causes the small blood vessels beneath the skin to constrict. Constricted blood vessels reduce bloodflow and ultimately minimise additional swelling.

Lacerations to the scalp Lacerations to the scalp are also very common in kids. However, they are a little more complicated to assess. Because of the rich blood supply to the head, even small lacerations can appear to be really nasty.

Small superficial lacerations that don’t appear to require stitches can be managed by applying direct pressure with a sterile dressing until the bleeding subsides. If you are unsure, rather err on the side of caution and have your little one checked out. It will put your mind at ease and, if anything more serious is present, it will be picked up during the examination. www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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HEALTH

Any wound that goes all the way through the scalp or seems to be gaping should be assessed by a healthcare professional. Paramedics pay careful attention to the mechanism that caused the laceration as it often gives us a good indication of what could be happening below the scalp. Expect to be asked a lot of questions about this. If the mechanism causing the injury involved quite a bit of force, there is always the possibility that the energy may have been transferred all the way through to the skull, causing a fracture. Fractures can only really be confirmed by means of an X-ray.

Skull fractures range from uncomplicated simple fractures needing little to no care to extremely dangerous high-risk fractures. I wouldn’t expect you to be able to know how severe a potential skull fracture is but there are a couple of external features to watch out for.

If your child develops any bruising around both eyes (racoon eyes) or behind the ears (battle sign) following a hard fall or head knock, and if these signs are accompanied by any change in your child’s mental status, it could be indicative of a really dangerous fracture to the base of the skull. If these signs or symptoms are suspected, please get your child to hospital or contact the emergency medical services urgently. This is not a common injury as it usually involves a huge amount of force. However, it is important to mention that the ‘racoon eyes’ described above are different from the common ‘blue eye’ most kids get from a direct bump to the eye. The major difference being the change in mental status and the amount of force applied.

Photo credit: Jay D Fisher, Medical Doctor

Fractures to the skull

Bruising around both eyes (racoon eyes) or behind the ears (battle sign) could be indicative of a dangerous fracture to the base of the skull.

• Any loss of consciousness, even if briefly • Your child won’t stop crying • Your child complains of head or neck pain or becomes increasingly difficult to console (younger kids) • Vomits several times • Won’t awaken easily • Clear fluid draining from the nose, ears or mouth following an injury involving the head • An obviously bad head wound You should trust your parenting instincts and respect your comfort zone. If you are concerned, it is a good indication that something is wrong. As parents, we are all exposed to different things and therefore have different levels of experience. While I have attended to thousands of minor head injuries, I have also seen an endless list of really bad head injuries involving kids. My understanding of minor and severe will therefore differ considerably to yours.

Head injuries should never be underestimated and things can go wrong very quickly. If there is ever any doubt, always seek medical attention…

Concussion Concussion is defined as a temporary loss of brain function from a hard knock or jolt to the brain.

It is considered a traumatic brain injury and for this reason all suspected concussions should be evaluated in a hospital. Repetitive concussions can cause permanent injury to the brain and should never be considered to be minor.

Adults and children with a concussion will usually not remember what happened immediately before or after the injury, and may appear very confused. A concussion can affect memory, judgment, reflexes, speech, balance, and muscle coordination. If you suspect concussion in your child, please seek immediate professional medical assistance.

Gavin is a paramedic and previous head of training for the Western Cape Emergency Medical Services. He is currently the chief operating officer at Be Safe Paramedical South Africa. www.be-safe.co.za

This is the question most often asked by parents. All those other bits of information are really interesting but when do I really need to worry? This is a tricky one to answer because kids are all so unique and they respond in very different ways to trauma. So what I usually tell parents is this: You know your child better than anyone so if following any injury involving the head you notice any change in your child’s behaviour, rather have him assessed.

In addition to this, any of the following signs and symptoms could indicate that a head injury is more serious than originally thought: www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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Photo credit: Gavin Sutton

When should you worry?

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HEALTH

Pregnancy nausea hyperemesis or gravidarum?

A common pregnancy symptom is nausea, and for most women this subsides after the first trimester. However, for some, severe nausea and vomiting occurs – referred to by your doctor as hyperemesis gravidarum. This can easily result in dehydration, weight loss (5% or greater), as well as nutritional deficiencies.

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yperemesis can begin as early as weeks four to six of pregnancy, though it most commonly occurs between weeks eight and 12. For some women, hyperemesis continues until after their babies are born but for the majority, there is a significant improvement by week 20.

It is thought that women who experience hyperemesis are less likely to miscarry – an elevation of pregnancy hormones causing the nausea is an indication that perhaps their pregnancy is more stable. The true cause for hyperemesis is still not clearly understood, although fluctuating hormone levels undoubtedly play a role. The only guarantee is that there is almost complete relief from nausea and vomiting after the baby is born.

In mothers who are experiencing hyperemesis, many worry that their babies will not be receiving the nutrients they need to grow and develop optimally.

But in the majority of cases, the baby does just fine.

Nature has designed them to be very proficient in obtaining what they need first, so more commonly it is the mother that is the one who misses out. In situations where a mother is unable to keep any fluid or food down, hospitalisation becomes necessary.

Risk factors for hyperemesis gravidarum • Multiple pregnancy where a mother is carrying two or more babies • Gestational diabetes • Hyperthyroidism – this is a condition where the thyroid gland is overactive and not functioning as it should be • In mothers who have a history of hyperemesis gravidarum in a previous pregnancy

Signs and symptoms of hyperemesis gravidarum • Severe, continual vomiting • Dehydration and a decrease in urine output

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HEALTH

Hyperemesis can begin as early as weeks four to six of pregnancy, though it most commonly occurs between weeks eight and 12.”

• Sleepiness, lack of energy, fatigue and inability to focus on anything other than the feelings of nausea • Headaches, feeling confused and faint or lightheaded

What’s the point of it?

Some researchers believe that morning sickness is a protective built-in mechanism preventing the mother and the foetus from contracting food-borne

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illnesses. Common aversions are to raw meat, raw or uncooked fruit and vegetables, or foods with a strong odour. While this is all fine, in hyperemesis, it’s as if the body has taken this little message to the extreme.

Intractable vomiting, dehydration and feeling miserable are common signs.

Treatment for hyperemesis gravidarum • Occasionally hospitalisation and rehydration with intravenous fluids is necessary. This is commonly done with a solution of water, salts or electrolytes and glucose. Correcting electrolyte imbalance is the objective of treatment.

• Supplements may become necessary for women who have developed low potassium levels, and these are administered as an additive through an intravenous fluid drip.

• Some women require feeding via a nasogastric tube. This is a fine, silicone tube that is inserted through one of their nasal passages, over the back of the throat and down into the stomach. Energydense, easily-digested, highly-fortified solutions are slowly ‘drip’ fed directly into the stomach.

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HEALTH • Vitamin B6 Pyridoxine can be prescribed and is effective in alleviating nausea. Folic Acid and other vitamin, iron and mineral supplements are also necessary if these nutrients are not being absorbed because of continual vomiting.

• Antacids are also an option and reduce the acid production in the stomach. Occasionally medication to hasten stomach emptying is also prescribed.

• Anti-emetic (nausea and vomiting) drugs are commonly prescribed. These may be given as injections or via a drip.

• Anti-histamines are another commonly prescribed family of medications.

• Avoidance of foods that start the vomiting cycle.

Often cold, bland foods are better tolerated than hot food. Heating food generates more of a smell and this alone can be sufficient to start the cycle of vomiting again.

• Referral to a dietician who specialises in obstetric care and treatment. Dietary planning around maximising kilojoule and nutrient intake through foods that are more palatable and less likely to lead to vomiting is the goal of dietetic management.

• Sometimes lifestyle changes are necessary. For women who work in the food industry, who live or work where the smell of food is a constant trigger, or whose lifestyle is based around food generally, changes or modifications may become necessary.

• Psychological support is often necessary. Continual nausea and vomiting can lead to feelings of depression. Short periods of nausea can make anyone feel miserable but when it is continual and does not abate, this wears down the most optimistic of people. Anti-depressant medication is only considered if the risks to the mother or her baby of her hyperemesis continuing are greater than the potential side effects of taking medication.

• For some women, combination therapies of traditional Western treatment with alternatives, such as acupuncture and/or acupressure, have been found to be useful. Though from an evidence-based perspective, there is little science to support their usefulness.

Intractable vomiting, dehydration and feeling miserable are common signs.”

• Ginger in all forms – tea, soft drinks and beverages, biscuits, sweets, crystallised and in cooking – can bring relief to some women.

• Hypnosis, deep muscle relaxation, positive imagery and visualisation can be effective. But none of these can help with rehydration – only coping with feelings of nausea and, hopefully, improving the mother’s ability to retain food and fluids.

• Sucking on ice-cubes, chips of ice or sips of iced water may be all that can be tolerated at times.

Electrolyte replacement solutions, when prepared as per manufacturer’s recommendations, are a useful, short-term option to replace the body’s electrolyte balance when vomiting has been continual.

• Eating crackers, dry toast and very bland easily digested foods in small amounts will help to maintain blood sugar levels and combat nausea.

What’s important about hyperemesis gravidarum is that it is not just passed off as ‘one of those things’ during pregnancy. It can become a serious health issue and compromise the health of a mother and her baby if left untreated.

To feel nauseated is relatively normal in early pregnancy, but it almost always settles towards the second trimester. Hyperemesis is more than this and causes real misery for pregnant mothers.

Ed: Thank you to Huggies for this highly-informative article. For more interesting reading, visit www.huggies.co.za.

What’s the difference between

pregnancy nausea and hyperemesis gravidarum?

Normal pregnancy

Hyperemesis gravidarum

Feeling nauseous, occasional vomiting

Feeling nauseous the majority of the time

Sometimes the nausea is accompanied by vomiting but not always

Nausea accompanied by severe vomiting

Feelings of nausea come and go – there is some respite

Continual feelings of nausea, which continue for most of the day and night – little relief

Some retention of food and fluids – ie not everything taken into the stomach is vomited back up

Vomiting so severe it means that no foods or fluids are being retained; everything is coming back up

Occasional vomiting, which does not have an effect on the mother’s hydration levels

Vomiting to the point of fluid compromise; signs of dehydration become present

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HEALTH

A healthy

pregnancy For so many reasons, a healthy pregnancy is essential for both you and your baby. The excitement of discovering you’re pregnant is quickly followed by many questions – is this really true? Where do I start? And, how do I change or adapt my life?

Lynne Bluff, a registered nurse and midwife, offers this advice.

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hat wonderful heady feeling of having just done a pregnancy test and the results are positive. Oh wow! There’s great excitement, mixed emotions, and a lot of questions about what comes next. Here are some important basics you should know.

for brain development – in fact, just launched is a new test that reveals your body’s omega status with a finger prick to ensure adequate levels in your body. Remember foods to avoid – sushi (sorry!), blue cheeses, and raw meats.

A healthy diet

Lifestyle changes

You need to nourish your body well and make sure your baby gets all the important nutrients to build a healthy body and brain. So, what does a healthy diet look like? In a nutshell, eat different colour foods prepared in different ways. This will go a long way to ensuring you are having a balanced diet.

No, you don’t have to eat for two, but definitely for more than one. A good maternity supplement is essential, as well as folic acid. Omega 3 is important

You must now consider your baby first. Smoking and second-hand smoke is totally out. Smoking increases your baby’s risk of being small, health issues, prematurity, and SIDS, among others. No alcohol is the safest option to give your baby the best start in life. Dad, support her in this and both of you can cut it out for the next nine months. No recreational drugs at all. Make sure you are not exposing your baby to environmental hazards or chemical hazards at work.

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HEALTH Exercise Your body is preparing for labour. Labour means hard work – you wouldn’t consider running a marathon without adequate training. The same goes for training for labour – preparation is wise. Walking is a wonderful form of exercise and accessible to everyone. Swimming is wonderful in summer – it helps to keep you cool and eases the weightiness of pregnancy. Make sure you don’t overheat during exercise as this is dangerous for your baby. Avoid contact sports. You can still attend the gym but modifications of exercises are important, particularly those abdominal muscles.

Medication Do not take any medications unless prescribed by your doctor. Don’t use over the counter medications as a first line of action for something. If you have a headache, don’t reach for the pill box, rather go and lie down, have something to eat and drink, and see if you can’t get over it that way first. If you are HIV positive and are on ARVs – those must be taken – that is best for you and your baby.

Sleep Sleep is something that is so important yet often elusive to a pregnant mom. A pregnant body is working so hard and taking enormous strain, so sleep is more important than usual. It is during sleep that your body recovers and heals. Try to build your pillow base around your body as your pregnancy advances so your body gets as much support as possible. But remember nature prepares you for those sleeplessness nights of babydom by getting you up umpteen times a night to got to the loo and change position.

Relieving aches and pains Your body is experiencing massive changes as it adapts to being pregnant. Relaxin, a hormone circulating in your body during pregnancy, causes your joints and muscles to relax. But this results in your joints sometimes feeling a bit rickety and unstable.

Your back can ache as it tries to compensate for the change in your centre of gravity. Pelvic tilts are particularly helpful for this. Pelvic floor muscle exercises are important to do every day to keep those muscles under control and for you to have control of your urine flow, particularly when laughing, coughing and sneezing.

dreams about your new family together. Dad, be involved from day one, together with her, it is so worth it!

Getting educated Even with all the information available online, childbirth education classes or antenatal classes are still as essential as ever. Ensure you attend a good programme where the educator teaches informed decision making and chats about all options available for pregnancy and birth. Be selective as to which classes you attend – do your homework wisely in this regard so you know you will definitely benefit from them. Being able to ask all sorts of questions from a professional who is unhurried to answer them is priceless. She is also able to put things in a balanced perspective. Dr Google definitely doesn’t do this, and you might be reading all sorts of old fashioned ideas and concepts rather than hearing about the latest evidence-based medicine. As a midwife working with labouring moms, you can definitely see the difference between someone who has been to great classes and is well prepared for labour and birth, and someone who isn’t. The calm balanced way a mom goes through labour when fully prepared and enlightened is something so beautiful to be part of.

Watching that couple work together and bringing their preparations for birth to life is awesome indeed.

The next nine months are such an exciting time – be well prepared and give your baby the best start in life by making informed decisions. Have fun on this lifelong journey ahead and enjoy every step.

Lynne Bluff is a registered nurse and midwife, an internationally-certified childbirth educator, editor of the Expectant Mothers Guide, national coordinator of the Childbirth Educator’s Professional Forum and a mother to Jason and Tamii. To find a childbirth educator in your area, visit www.expectantmothersguide. co.za or www.facebook.com/ ExpectantMothersGuideZA.

Relationships

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Photo credit: Lynne Bluff

Relationships can be all over the place during pregnancy. Moms are aware of their bodies changing on a daily basis and find their pregnancies totally consuming. On the other hand, Dad knows you are pregnant and is pleased you are, but that is where it ends for him. His everyday life goes on unaffected. His processing of this pregnancy is on a different timeline to mom, and different issues come to the fore for him. The best solution is to talk about it together so you each know how the other is feeling and what your individual needs are. This can bring you closer together as a couple as you share your

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HEALTH

Sustainable food

principles in action

By Megan Pentz-Kluyts

Anywhere along the food supply chain – from farm to fork – food can be wasted. However, you can give your family a more sustainable food source and simultaneously make a positive contribution to society, the economy and the environment.

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here are five key principles for planning a more sustainable family menu: 1. Aim for at least one meat-free day a week.

2. Peas, beans and lentils are sustainable and versatile in meals and snacks.

3. Serve oily fish twice a week and buy from sustainable sources.

4. Cut down on processed foods (ready-made confectionary, processed meats, such as sausages and pies, and ready-made sauces).

5. Plan menus around in-season produce.

Growing Encourage children from an early age to find out where food comes from and how it grows. Start a vegetable garden or a window-box of herbs. This can lead to more interest about the food on their plates and has been shown to be helpful in encouraging your child to eat a greater variety of fruits and vegetables.

Recycle food waste to provide compost and nutrient-rich soil to grow food from.

Buying Buying food in bulk is a good way of cutting down on the number of shopping trips, providing food can be stored safely and used by sell-by dates.

Check for a ‘box scheme’ in your local community and buy fresh local fruit and vegetables. By doing this, children can enjoy a range of seasonal produce.

Cooking We can reduce the amount of energy we use by thinking about the most efficient method of cooking.

Serve some parts of meals raw or use minimal heat to cook. Many children like the crunchy texture of raw or lightly steamed vegetables.

If you are cooking something on the stove, use the steam to cook vegetables by placing a colander over the pan and covering it with a lid. Stir frying, one-pot cooking, and using a pressure-cooker are also efficient and quick methods.

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Storage Having the fridge set either too warm or too cold can waste energy and spoil food, so regularly check it is at the correct setting – between 0 and 50°C.

Suitable food portions Prepare food with portion sizes in mind. If we all stop wasting food that could have been eaten, the benefit to the planet would be the equivalent of taking one in five cars off the road.

For more information, call Laurika Swartz at Rialto Foods on +27 021 555 2160/1/2. www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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HEALTH

Navigating the minefield of

toddler nutrition

By Claire McHugh, Infant & Child Nutritionist, and Pampers Institute Expert

When your baby is about six months old, she is ready to start trying food and liquids other than breast milk or formula. While you want to know that she is eating the right foods to ensure her development is on track, the amount of conflicting information about children’s nutrition, and the large variety of baby food products available can be overwhelming.

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he good news is that, contrary to what baby food marketers will try to tell you, babies and children do not need special foods to keep healthy. In fact, as long as you follow a few simple nutritional guidelines, and blend or cut up their food, your tot can eat a similar diet to yours, which can make your life much easier.

Plan ahead Being well prepared can take a lot of the worry out of mealtimes. It is therefore a good idea to plan your family’s meals for the week or month ahead and then make a shopping list. Buy more of the staple foods (breads, cereals, fruit, vegetables, rice, and dairy) that provide the most nutrients. These tend to last longer through the week and form the basis of your meals.

Prepare meals and snacks from all five food groups Although not every meal or snack that you prepare for your toddler must include all five food groups, ensure that her daily diet has a good mix of these five. The main food groups are: • Carbohydrates – give your child a variety of starchy food as they are the body’s primary energy source. Try to get in five servings a day.

Some examples include cereal, bread, potatoes, rice, crackers, couscous and mielie meal.

• Vegetables and fruit – these are rich in vitamins and minerals. Incorporate a wide variety and aim for five servings a day. To avoid unnecessary food wastage, you can buy frozen, canned or fresh to get the same nutrients.

• Protein – meat, fish, chicken, eggs and nuts (ensure they are chopped) are all good sources of the one to two servings of protein youngsters should have a day. Most children prefer softer cuts of meat such as chicken, minced meat, sausages, paté or slowly baked meat. For a bit of variety, opt for beans and lentils.

• Dairy – your toddler should have two to three servings of full-fat milk, cheese and yoghurt a day to help her build strong bones and teeth. You can also supplement these servings with breast milk.

• Fat – young children need more fat than we do for their development, but be sure not to replace other food groups with fat. Healthy fats include avocados and olive oil. Remember, though, that much of your toddler’s fat requirements come from full-fat protein and dairy products, so it is not really necessary to buy special foods. Limit the fried food, cake and biscuits.

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Aim for one tablespoon per year of your child’s age for each dish.”

Keep your baby hydrated The best drink for your toddler is plain and simple water. Six to eight drinks a day (about 120ml per serving) should be enough, unless your toddler is very active and the weather is really hot. Avoid sugary and fizzy drinks and tea and coffee. If you do want to occasionally give your child fruit juice, dilute it with lots of water. Move away from bottles and use beakers and cups instead.

Don’t overfeed Many parents get anxious that their children are not getting enough nutrients and tend to overfeed them, making them overweight and unhealthy. Your child only needs small quantities of different foods a day, which can be divided into three meals and two snacks. Aim for one tablespoon per year of your child’s age for each dish (about two or three dishes per main meal). For example, a two-year-old child should receive two tablespoons each of carrots, rice, and mince.

It’s important that you never force feed your child.

Instead of focusing on a clean plate, encourage eating until they’re full. Don’t make a big fuss when the child refuses a particular food. Wait a little bit, and try a few days later with a positive attitude.

Remember that it can take a toddler up to 20 times of trying a certain food to decide whether or not she actually likes it.

Make mealtimes fun Bear in mind that it’s not just what babies eat that’s important for their development – how they are exposed to food also helps shape their brains. You should encourage them to use all their five senses to explore the foods they are eating, such as grabbing the food with their hands, or watching you feed them with an ‘aeroplane’ spoonful of sustenance. Think of mealtime as playtime, so you focus less on the mess and more on the fun your toddler is having while she learns.

For your child to grow, develop and explore, she needs a balanced diet with lots of different foods that do not need to be ‘baby-specific’ foods. Don’t worry if you don’t always manage to feed your child a nourishing diet every day. As long as your toddler eats well most of the time, she will be getting plenty of nutrients.

For more information, visit www.pampers.co.za.

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Available at selected Pharmacies and Medirite stores.

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EDUCATION: BACK TO SCHOOL

Time to tackle

bullying

by the horns

The increase in the number and severity of bullying incidents in South African schools calls for urgent and sustained intervention, insists education expert, Gillian Mooney.

‘A

lmost every week we hear of another desperate learner or parent having to deal with the physical and emotional trauma of bullying, yet society and the authorities’ responses continue to be reactive and unsuccessful in addressing the bigger issue,’ says education expert Dr Gillian Mooney, Teaching and Learning Manager at The Independent

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Institute of Education, South Africa’s leading private higher education institution.

‘The cases making it into the media represent only a fraction of the mistreatment many children experience. However, the devastating consequences of bullying are leaving a lasting mark on the lives of countless youngsters, and the problem

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EDUCATION: BACK TO SCHOOL

Both boys and girls are the targets of physical bullying.”

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Dangerous misconceptions about bullying FALSE – Adults should stay out of it when children are bullied. Adults must become involved. Teachers can monitor bullies to deter bullying behaviour. Principals can discipline. Parents can report to schools.

FALSE: Boys are the most likely victims. Both boys and girls are equally susceptible to bullying, although perhaps in different ways. Both boys and girls are the targets of physical bullying. Girls are more likely to experience relational, sexual and cyberbullying.

FALSE: Children should just toughen up. This myth is a hangover from ideas such as ‘boys will be boys’, and that children will ‘work it out’. Bullying can cause real harm and should not be ignored.

FALSE: Bystanders should stay out of it when they witness bullying. Evidence suggests that bystanders are also affected by witnessing bullying. Observers also give bullies the audiences that they crave, and legitimacy if they do not sanction the behaviour.

Children can be taught to reduce bullying by noticing, reporting and intervening.

FALSE: It is easy to spot a bullied child. Children do not report everything that happens in their lives to their parents. Adults need to find ways to make reporting bullying easier for children, and to follow up effectively when they do.

Dr Gillian Mooney is the teaching and learning manager at The Independent Institute of Education (IIE). The IIE focusses on quality teaching and learning practices in which access to tertiary education is actively promoted. The IIE offers 90 CHE-accredited qualifications and includes diverse tertiary spaces, namely Varsity College, the Design School of South Africa, Rosebank College and Vega. Gillian currently works closely with the individuals responsible for curriculum design and implementation. For more information, visit www.iie.ac.za or www.theworldofwork.co.za.

Photo credit: The Independent Institute of Education

will continue growing unless an effective strategy is developed and consistently enforced,’ she insists.

Gillian notes that national and provincial education departments throughout South Africa do have policies and procedures in place, albeit to varying degrees, on how schools should respond to bullying behaviour. ‘But more needs to be done to consistently support and educate learners, parents, and schools to ensure the safety and wellbeing of everyone on the school grounds,’ she adds.

She acknowledges that the challenge is enormous, and says that the crisis of bullying relates to more than just schools. ‘Society has become a virtual fight club with examples of bullying behaviour abounding on social media, for instance. People feel free to behave appallingly, to the degree that anti-social behaviour has become almost accepted practice.’

She explains that bullying is centrally about trying to gain power, which means that a rise in bullying can be expected in societies where citizens feel disempowered.

‘Bullying has a ripple effect – the bully, the victim, and the bystander are affected. Problematic home circumstances – domestic abuse, divorce, or the death of a parent – could also provide a context in which the bully seeks to gain power through negative behaviour.’

Gillian believes it is important that high-profile and easily-accessible structures and processes are put in place to help schools deal with bullying – teachers often feel their hands are tied and victims of bullying feel that they have no voice. Additionally, bullies themselves should receive adequate support and counselling.

However, most importantly, methods of addressing the prevailing power imbalance must urgently be found to enforce that bullying will consistently have clear and structured consequences for perpetrators.

‘Some provinces have gone some way to establish structures and processes, but even in those instances, more must be done to communicate these interventions and systemically enforce anti-bullying processes.’

Gillian acknowledges that bullying in schools does not stand independently of the mindset and zeitgeist in which we find ourselves as a society. ‘While there is no quick fix for either the malaise in broader society or indeed within our schools, we have a duty to ensure that the most vulnerable among us are better protected, and feel empowered to know that they can speak up and rely on the adults around them to prevent them from physical and emotional harm as far as possible,’ she notes.

‘When we have a situation in our schools where known bullies continue to wreak havoc upon the

lives and futures of others, knowing that the system is slow and ineffectual in responding to anti-social behaviour, we are doing the victim and our society as a whole a great injustice.’

www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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EDUCATION: BACK TO SCHOOL

Raising

tomorrow’s effective

leaders

Marlinie Ramsamy, CEO of FranklinCovey South Africa, discusses ways that parents can teach their children the skills they need to become credible leaders.

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EDUCATION: BACK TO SCHOOL

T

he choices we make as adults and our attitudes toward life are often a reflection of our upbringing and the values ingrained in us by our parents. From the career path we choose to the person we decide to marry, the home environment sets the tone for what a person will go on to achieve in later years, which is why establishing a strong set of principles that govern your family is so crucial.

Research shows that children who spend more one-on-one time with parents receiving positive attention and care in their formative years, become more effective leaders and are more likely to achieve success in later years. However, modernday life presents a new set of challenges (TV, console games, tablet computers and mobile phones) for parents to navigate.

There needs to be a measure of self-discipline to help children achieve the goals that are important to their development. Successful athletes and entrepreneurs are great examples of the type of focus and determination it takes to achieve great things – a bit of TV may seem harmless, but mindless hours of television is a time robber that takes the attention away from bigger, more important life goals.

Parents need to take responsibility for their families and the direction in which each member is heading to ensure good leadership qualities are instilled and nurtured in children from a young age. Parents should be constantly asking themselves how they are shaping the moral compass of their children, developing their ethical behaviour, and promoting credible leadership. Do their children know what they stand for as a family? Do they know what they stand for in their personal capacity?

On a mission Most organisations, regardless of size, develop a mission statement. However, the most important institution – the family – very rarely has a mission statement or even a vision statement. Work on building a structured framework to guide your family, which includes the following considerations: • Develop a family vision with your and your children’s dreams in mind. This helps them to learn that they need not be trapped within their circumstances. Change and growth start with a vision for your life.

• Create a family mission statement that details the specific goals that everyone would like to achieve in three, five and 10 years’ time. A company takes great care in formulating mission statements to achieve business objectives, and the same principle applies to families.

• Be more conscious of your children’s needs. This can be difficult when you’re juggling a busy schedule, but understanding the issues affecting your kids and the goals they would like to achieve means that you are in a better position to help them solve problems or maintain focus throughout the year. This encourages confidence in children and the security of knowing that you’re there to coach them through the tough stretches.

• Have a set of values that applies equally to every member of the family. If honesty is a core www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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Work on building a structured framework to guide your family.” value in your family, then do not hide important information or lie to your children as they are more likely to copy your behaviour than heed your words. If you want your kids to buy into the values you’ve set out then you need to be consistent – not only with them, but with yourself.

• Get to know their friends. Speaking to their friends and developing an open relationship with their peers provides insight into what they are thinking, how they make friends, and their decisionmaking capability – it will provide insight into what they value in relationships.

• Keep lines of communication open. Try to create an ‘open door’ environment at home where children feel comfortable enough to speak to you about anything that is bothering them.

Regardless of how you feel about the situation, don’t interrogate them. Let them tell you what they want to. Keep your opinion to yourself.

• Seek first to understand. I’ve seen how ego and pride can cause a complete breakdown in communication between husband and wife, and it has the same impact on your relationship with your children. There’s nothing worse than feeling unheard and dismissed, especially among family.

First, listen to what your child has to say and give her the opportunity to say everything she wants to before formulating an opinion. Your response needs to be cognisant of your values, her feelings, and the issues she faces. It is by modelling good communication that you teach your kids about what it takes to be a leader because only a good communicator can be a great leader. Be a good listener – listen with your heart, your eyes and your mind.

I’m also mindful that circumstances differ for every parent – someone who struggles to make ends meet might not have the luxury of spending more than an hour or two of quality time a day with their children because they are working multiple jobs or travelling long distances to work. Even so, parents can still use the time they have to steer the family in the right direction and ensure that every member feels valued, loved and protected.

The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Families programme offers parents a systematic and holistic way to approach family life, allowing you to build the life that you all want – at work, at school and at home. It guides you on how to show your children that they are a product of their choices, and not their circumstances.

For more information, visit http://franklincoveysa. co.za/.

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EDUCATION: BACK TO SCHOOL

The importance of

treating teens as

young adults

By Ina Engelbrecht, Abbots College Centurion

Have South Africa’s teachers taught our children to approach life in a mature, responsible way that encourages constructive communication and problem-solving skills? Here’s why Abbots College believes in treating its teens as young adults.

I

n general, teachers tend to teach in the same way that they were taught by their own teachers.

However, taking into account the generation gap between teachers and learners, this has led to the use of out-dated teaching methods. For decades, children were not allowed to have an opinion or think for themselves, but did this attitude produce a generation of critical, creative, and reflective thinkers that accept responsibility and believe in accountability?

Students all over the country have been rioting and demanding free education. They assume that having a free education will open up the world to them and put them on their way to a better, brighter future. Were these students provided with the critical thinking skills that is necessary to evaluate the assumption that ‘free’ education will not necessarily mean ‘quality’ education that will produce the leaders we need for building a prosperous future?

Did teachers in general produce a young generation that has the ability to communicate effectively and appropriately about an issue such as university fees without vandalising and demolishing the same infrastructure that must be used to make them lawyers, doctors, or teachers?

Where must a teen learn and practise how to be a responsible adult if the school environment does not

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treat them like young adults and it is not expected of them to act accordingly?

At Abbotts College, we believe in treating our teens as young adults because we believe that if we challenge them, they will rise to the occasion.

Teens can be guided to handle the challenges and responsibilities of adulthood only if they function in a school environment where it is expected of them to behave like young adults with the associated rights and responsibilities. They are treated with respect and care but must also act with respect and care towards their teachers and peers. They are given realistic boundaries and, if needed, appropriate intervention is taken. By treating them as young adults we strive to instil in them a strong work ethic, resulting in personal responsibility and accountability.

Effort ratings teach them that hard work does pay off and even if you do not obtain distinctions, you have shown yourself to be dedicated and positive in your approach to your academic challenges.

The words of John Maxwell say it all: ‘People rise and fall to meet your level of expectations for them. If you express scepticism and doubt in others, they will return your lack of confidence with mediocrity. But if you believe in them and expect them to do well, they will go the extra mile trying to do their best.’

ADvTECH Schools Division, www.advtech.co.za. www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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2016/12/19 11:01 PM

EDUCATION: BACK TO SCHOOL

Back to

school

The holidays are coming to an end and the new school year looms …

Emma Dawson provides some tips for getting back into the swing of things.

M

ost importantly, plan ahead for the new school year. Children follow their parents’ lead and if you’re organised, your children will be too.

Don’t leave buying school uniforms and stationery until the last minute. You’ll need to label uniforms and cover books – time-consuming jobs that shouldn’t be left until the night before.

The year-end break is long and, in many families, the rules are somewhat relaxed over the holidays.

Bedtime is a little later than normal, homework routines are out the window, and meal times vary according to holiday activities.

But now, it’s back to school and back to routine.

Here are some tips for getting everyone back into the swing of things: • Use the last week of the holidays to re-establish bedtimes.

• Hopefully not, but if you’ve let story time slip over the holidays get back into reading with and to your children every night before bed.

• Get the household up and moving at the time you’d normally start getting ready for school to avoid a stressful rush for everyone.

• Start eating regular meals – breakfast, lunch and supper, as well as snacks – at similar times to your children’s school breaks.

• Plan lunchboxes and shop ahead of time for healthy, nutritious lunchbox fillers.

• For children going to school for the first time, start nurturing confidence by explaining exactly what school will be like, and get your child to practice writing his name and tying his own shoe laces.

• For older children, nurture independence by letting your child make lists of what he’ll need for his school day, including sports clothes for extra-mural activities, and ensuring that he has his stationery and books packed and organised.

• At home, establish a place where your children will put their book bags, lunchboxes, and hang their uniforms and sports clobber. This will ensure there’s no last-minute rush in the mornings to search for missing soccer boots or books.

• Make homework part of your daily routine.

Establish a specific place and time for homework, and try to make yourself available as much as possible to help – especially for younger children.

• Make a family calendar to put on the fridge, or somewhere everyone can see it. Keep the

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calendar updated with extra-mural activities, project deadlines, friends’ parties, play dates, school outings, concerts, and anything that needs some degree of forward planning. This will drastically reduce last minute panics and will help children to learn to be organised.

• If you and your partner work fulltime, try to establish a backup plan in case your child gets sick and can’t go to school. Can you call Granny and Grandpa to help, or do you have a trusted babysitter, or network of friends’ Moms who can help? Having a sick child is stressful enough without also adding an unhappy boss into the mix. www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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2016/12/19 11:02 PM

EDUCATION

Toddler-appropriate

chores

build confidence

By Elizabeth Steenkamp, Principal of Junior Colleges Castillian

At birth, each of us is entirely reliant on others. It therefore stands to reason that childhood is an apprenticeship that gradually prepares us for adulthood. From infancy, children reach out to the world beginning with their mothers and fathers. As that bond is cemented, children seek more triumphs and competence.

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s a parent and educator, I know that living in the 21st Century means a demanding and dynamic lifestyle – at home and in the classroom. It is therefore important to instil a sense of ownership and pride within our children from a young age. By assigning responsibilities (chores), we are teaching them to build their self-esteem, teaching self-help skills, and encouraging their independence so that they too will one day cope with society’s demands.

By asking our toddlers to help with tasks not only ‘lifts the load’ for parents and teachers, but also teaches empathy by sharing responsibilities and becoming more self-confident when they accomplish their assigned tasks, particularly with little or no guidance. Chores are great tools to establish routine, which may reduce opportunities for confusion or disagreements among siblings or other toddlers if in a classroom environment.

Remember, each child develops at his own pace, so some children may be ready for chores that have been assigned, while others will only be able to perform tasks with support. Begin with one or two chores – it is important to only start with a few tasks at a time. You definitely don’t want to overwhelm your toddler or make them feel pressured. The main aim in giving your toddler chores is for them to feel capable, not overwhelmed.

As children approach chores, it’s guaranteed they’ll do things differently, and more messily than you! But as children gain finesse through trial and error, they’ll achieve mastery and build pride.

Don’t expect perfection or correct the work that he has done. There is plenty of time for that later when he is more competent at the task and has more confidence. What you want to focus on now is rewarding his effort. Your patience and gentle guidance will mean a lot.

In addition to simple chores, toddlers should also include attending to their own cleanliness, grooming, clothing, and toys.

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EDUCATION These chores will help you to foster an independent and confident toddler: 1. Pick up toys and books and put them in their suitable place (you must first assign clear places for your child’s belongings).

2. Put dirty clothes in the laundry basket – this can be done after bath, in the morning, and before bedtime.

3. Wipe the table after meals – not only is this an easy task, but children will love doing it!

4. Dusting and wiping – make it fun! Buy a bath hand puppet to use when dusting or wiping to ‘collect all the dust bunnies’.

5. Unload the groceries – after a grocery trip, let your toddler hand you items from the bags for you to pack away.

6. Help set the table – just be sure to only give your toddler safe, unbreakable objects.

7. Let him help you make the bed – do this chore together and squeeze in a little bonding while you work.

8. Clean up spills and messes with paper towel, a sponge, or a child-sized broom.

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9. Water plants – for this chore, provide measuring cups and a bucket of water and then let your toddler delight in pouring it into the pot and feeding the plant.

10. Sweeping – use a toddler-size broom and dust pan. While this is one chore that generally creates more work for you, they love helping and sweeping the dirt back and forth.

11. Pushing buttons – if there are buttons that need pushing (elevators, dishwasher, microwave, washer, dryer, even the coffee maker) let your toddler do it.

Toddlers love buttons! This chore, that isn’t quite a chore, is still teaching little ones to follow directions.

It also teaches them that they are capable, they can do it, and when possible, you will let them.

12. Help in the kitchen – there are so many ways toddlers can help in the kitchen, from stirring to pouring and washing fruit.

Chores enable your toddler to contribute to the family, and care for themselves and their personal belongings. It is a standard plan in an apprenticeship for adulthood.

ADvTECH Schools Division, www.advtech.co.za.

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EDUCATION

Choose your

swimming coach with care

By Eileen Xhakaza, Education & Training Manager at Swimming South Africa

Ensuring that your child attends an accredited swimming school, with an accredited and registered swimming teacher, is essential for his safety and confidence in the water.

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aby swimming is what Swimming South Africa (SSA) refers to as Tod Swim, which focuses on 12 to 48-month old babies and toddlers. The Tod swim programme allows parents and toddlers to develop toddlers’ swimming ability at the same time that they are learning to walk. Tod swim teachers adapt the earliest possible water survival skills to toddlers in a fun, loving way that ensures they are safe and continue to love water for years to come.

Generally, toddlers do not have a fear for water and unfortunately drowning statistics are estimated to be three times higher than any other age group.

Teachers who teach toddlers must have a Swimming South Africa Tod swim qualification. The Tod Swim Instructors’ Course is three days and offers a basic theoretical background to toddler teaching and instructions for the practical application of twelve swimming skills that toddlers can perform. Parents or caregivers accompany their toddlers in the water until toddlers reach a certain measure of independence.

LTS is for children from the age of four, and covers water safety education, water familiarisation, floating and movement skills, application of principles of movement in water and introduction to strokes. LTS teachers also undergo a three-day SSA LTS course that equips candidates to teach swimming.

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Benefits of swimming, particularly for children, include: • Swimming is a life skill • If children are able to swim they can save themselves and others • Swimming is fun, relaxing and enjoyable • Swimming forms the basis of any other water sport • It has health benefits – for example, asthmatics are encouraged to swim to strengthen their lungs • Swimming can help to reduce weight • Physical benefits, such as better blood circulation, endurance, balancing, and it builds body mass • Psychological benefits, such as building confidence, and swimming can be used as an emotional outlet • Social benefits – it develops relationships, can allow for community integration, and an opportunity for recreation • It’s a sport that we can be involved in from a very early age until old age.

• Fighting the scourge of drownings in South Africa.

It is very important for parents to ensure that when they take their children to swimming centres/schools that they ensure the facility is SSA accredited and that the teachers are accredited and registered with the SSA. For more information, visit www.swimsa.org.

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KICKS FOR KIDS

babys beyond and

a family lifestyle magazine

Back to school Sadly, the holidays are over but going back to school is exciting.

You’ll meet your teachers, make new friends, see old friends, play the sports you love, and learn lots of interesting new things.

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KICKS FOR KIDS

Crossword

a

b

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puzzle

Use the pictures to help you find the names of these farm animals and then colour in the pictures.

Trace the lines Trace the lines to finish the shapes and then colour in the shapes.

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KICKS FOR KIDS

c

Find

d

Spot the differences

Help this kitty get to his bowl of milk.

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the route

Can you find the 12 differences between these two pictures?

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2016/12/19 11:05 PM

Grab some grub

Pulled Pork Shoulder with Honey and Soy Crackling Method

The butcher will gladly loosen the skin over the shoulder for you and cut the fat remaining on the meat into a diamond pattern. Preparing pulled pork requires little effort, but lots of time. The delicious result is well worth it. We are cooking the pork in the oven, whereas traditionally, it is smoked over a slow fire.

You will need

3kg bone-in, skin-on pork shoulder 3T (45ml) Ina Paarman’s Braai & Grill Seasoning 2 onions, cut up into biggish chunks 2 cups (500ml) boiling water 2 x 25g Ina Paarman’s Liquid Chicken Stock 1 x 200ml Ina Paarman’s Honey & Soy Coat & Cook Sauce 1 sour dough bread

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If the rind has not been loosened, proceed as follows: Cut through the skin of the pork shoulder with the tip of a chef’s knife. Slide the knife blade just under the skin and work around to loosen the skin while pulling it off with your other hand. Cut a diamond pattern into the remaining fat on the meat.

Rub the pork generously with the Braai & Grill Seasoning, pat the Seasoning into the meat and fat.

Drape the skin back over the meat.

Wrap the shoulder tightly in plastic wrap and refrigerate for a minimum of 8 hours or overnight, up to a maximum of 48 hours.

Chop the onions and pile into a roaster with a lid, or a deep oval cast iron pot, barely bigger than the meat. Add Chicken Stock to boiling water and pour in on the side. Adjust the oven rack two slots below the middle and preheat the oven to 140°C, for a fan oven and 150°C, for a regular oven.

Unwrap the meat (keeping the skin on top) and place on the bed of onions. Cover with a tight-fitting lid or foil. Roast for 5½ hours. Uncover and lift off the skin.

Turn the oven temperature up to 200°C. Squeeze half of the Honey & Soy Sauce over the meat. Cut the skin into strips, season with Braai & Grill Seasoning and place on a separate baking tray. Put the skin into the oven with the meat. Roast open for 15 minutes.

After 15 minutes, brush meat with remaining sauce and roast the meat and skin for a final 15 minutes.

Rest meat for 15 minutes.

Dip slices of sour dough bread into the sauce or spoon sauce over the bread. Top with shredded pork and serve with salads of your choice. Coleslaw is a traditional must have.

Pull cooked pork apart with two forks for serving.

www.babysandbeyond.co.za

2016/12/19 11:07 PM

Grab some grub

Mini Ham and Cheese Quiches Sliced buttered bread spread with Sun-dried Tomato Pesto, makes a perfect container for a delicious filling. Serve warm for supper with a salad, or cold in lunch boxes the next day.

You will need Butter knife Pastry brush Fork Muffin pans Grater Measuring cup

Ingredients

12 slices of toaster bread, crusts removed ± 125g butter, melted for brushing over 1 x 125g Ina Paarman’s Sun-dried Tomato Pesto 125g thinly sliced sandwich ham (12 slices) 2 eggs, lightly beaten 2T (30ml) full cream milk ½ cup (40g) cheddar or gouda cheese, grated 1t (5ml) Ina Paarman’s Garlic & Herb Seasoning

Method

Adjust the oven rack to the middle position. Preheat oven to 180°C. Brush both sides of the bread slices first with melted butter and then spread Tomato Pesto on one side.

Press bread into 12 well buttered muffin hollows. Bake for 8 to 10 minutes, tomato side up, or until golden.

Line each baked bread case with a slice of ham.

Place the egg, milk, grated cheddar and Seasoning in a measuring cup and beat with a fork to combine. Pour and spoon the mixture into the bread cases and bake for 15 minutes or until puffy and golden.

Gently ease mini quiches out of the muffin hollows.

Serve with a salad or pack cold into lunchboxes.

Recipes and pictures courtesy of

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promising products

Babe-Eeze silicone teething bibs

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Photo credit: Babe-Eeze

abe-Eeze has extended its baby teething products by adding a range of practical, fun silicone teething bibs.

Babies who are teething constantly need something to chew on, they drool continuously, and Babe-Eeze teething bibs are perfect for this. Babies can chew on the non-toxic, silicone end of the bib while the bib helps to keep the chest dry. The bib is reversible and uses two clever snap buttons at the back of the neck that allow for expansion as your baby’s neck grows.

As well as being practical, Babe-Eeze silicone teething bibs are stylish and come in pink and blue with bright coloured prints on a soft cotton fabric with a plain fabric backing.

The bibs are soft and comfortable, so won’t hamper baby’s sleep pattern, and they don’t need any special care when washing.

All Babe-Eeze products are free from BPA, PVC, Phthalates, cadmium, and lead. They are available from Dis-Chem and select Pharmacies for around R149 each.

Rooibos on the go

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Photo credit:Café Enrista

afé Enrista’s Instant Rooibos and Honey Tea is an ultra-convenient, drink for adults and children on the go. It is refreshing and calming with a pronounced taste of Rooibos, complemented with the soothing notes of pure honey.

The beauty of this rooibos tea is that it comes in a sachet – just add hot water. Besides being caffeine-free, other benefits include its complete dissolvability (there are no leaves or residual), it is superbly flavour enhanced using the best pure ingredients and, through extensive consumer taste panel testing, the taste is perfected for South African palates.

Café Enrista has provided samples for you with this edition of Baby’s and Beyond so that you can try it for yourselves. For more information, visit www.cafe-enrista.co.za.

Increased hydration for skin

T

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Photo credit: Epi-Max

he Epi-Max Baby & Junior range, now in new packaging, is ideal for little ones suffering from eczema, sensitive skin conditions, or simply as a treat for your newborn’s skin.

The Epi-Max Baby & Junior Cream and Lotion can be used as a soap substitute that doubles up as a moisturiser. It is gentle and mild enough to use from birth.

The Epi-Max Baby & Junior Bathe is the perfect addition to any bath-time ritual. It contains evening primrose oil, vitamin E, and pure lavender essential oil to soothe your baby’s skin. These products are available at DisChem, Clicks, and selected pharmacies. Prices range from R25 and R62. For more information, visit www.epimax.co.za.

www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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promising products

Boost your first aid kit for summer

Photo credit: BuchuLife

Here are five tips to keep in mind when preparing a first aid kit for summer: Never underestimate the sun Remember you and your children need constant sun and heat protection both inside and out.

Dehydration is one of most common causes of summer illness, and it is easily prevented by drinking clean water often.

Ensure that everyone has adequate skin protection – sunscreen and protective clothing.

Sunscreens should be applied 30 minutes before sun exposure to allow the ingredients to fully bind to the skin. Reapplication of sunscreen is just as important as putting it on in the first place, so reapply the same amount every two hours. This is particularly important if you are swimming.

Properly support joints Good quality, supportive hiking shoes for every member of the family helps to avoid joint injuries.

However, rambling over rough terrain can easily take its toll no matter how good your shoes are, and it’s important to know how to deal with a sprain. The RICE treatment method is usually recommended – get rest, use ice to reduce inflammation, apply compression if necessary, and elevate the foot.

Don’t get burnt You are more likely to be cooking over open coals or gas flames during summer. Especially where children are concerned, it is important that they are aware of the hazards of fire. Always follow proper precautions and ensure that children keep their distance around fires, hot braai equipment, gas lighting and candles.

Soothe insect bites and skin irritations Mosquitos and other biting insects can compromise your comfort so it’s a good idea to invest in safe, natural insect repellents, and keep the family well-covered. Irritating stings and bites need to be treated as scratching can lead to infections.

Treat grazes, scratches and other wounds Injuries that break the skin, however slight they may seem, need to be properly looked after. The first

step is to stop bleeding, and then thoroughly clean the wound. Use clean drinking water for proper and safe wound cleansing. Topical ointments with antibacterial properties will help to protect the wound and support healing.

So, what is the perfect addition to any first aid kit?

Because space is always an issue, look for multipurpose products and meds. A great example is BuchuLife First Aid Gel, a topical gel infused with the oil of the indigenous Buchu plant. It boasts proven anti-septic, anti-fungal, antihistamine and antiinflammatory properties that makes the product versatile in its uses. BuchuLife First Aid Gel can be used to effectively treat burns, insect bites, skin rashes, and open wounds, soothe sunburn instantly, reduce muscle and joint inflammation, and bring instant relief to itching. It has no harmful side-effects and is safe for use on babies and children. For more information, visit www.buchulife.com.

To find out more about getting your product listed in this Promising Products section.

contact: Elroy van Heerden on 021 424 3625 or elroy@babysandbeyond.co.za

www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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promising products

Maddy Magoo expands

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Tips for children who hate getting their hair cut: • Take your child to the hairdresser first thing in the morning or just after they’ve had a good nap to ensure they’re not tired and grumpy.

• Refrain from calling it a ‘haircut’ as most children associate the word ‘cut’ with pain.

Rather tell toddlers they’re going to get a ‘trim’.

• Create a game to introduce your child to getting her haircut. Use kitchen tongs to help her get used to hearing noise close to her ears, and seeing something shiny moving around her head. Drop shredded paper around her head to imitate falling hair.

• Let her watch other people get a haircut first, especially a friend or family member. This will make her curious and help her realise the process isn’t scary.

• Make the trip fun by stopping at the play park or going for an ice-cream or milkshake first.

• Sit on the hairdresser’s chair with your child on your lap (even during the haircut), and explain what all the equipment is used for.

• Take a favourite toy or blanket for comfort.

For more information, visit www.maddymagoo.co.za.

Photo credit: Kids Emporium

addy Magoo – a revolutionary children’s hair salon that focuses on innovative hair care, cuts and styling – was specifically designed for children from all ethnic backgrounds. After successfully creating a strong presence in Gauteng, Maddy Magoo launched in Pretoria, and the Western Cape and KwaZulu-Natal are next.

Maddy Magoo was founded by Lauren de Swardt – the same successful mumpreneur who created Kids Emporium. ‘I realised the need for a child-friendly salon after my then four-year-old son refused to go to the hairdresser. It dawned on me that hair salons can seem very frightening to a young child. I was also amazed that there were no hair salons that catered for people from all ethnic backgrounds under one roof,’ Lauren explains.

‘What makes Maddy Magoo distinct is that each salon is fun enough for little ones, but cool enough for tweens. The salons use a variety of child-friendly products, and hairdressers are trained to work with children and to cut and style all hair types,’ Lauren adds.

Maddy Magoo is a fun-filled experience for toddlers with activities including before and after photographs, a personalised Certificate of Bravery for the first haircut, and a lock of hair as a keepsake. Glamour parties that cater for six to 20 girls, from the age of five, are also on offer. The birthday girl receives a CD of photos to remember the special occasion as well as a Maddy Magoo voucher as a birthday gift.

Mimu’s baby cleaning range is born

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Photo credit: Mimu

imu has arrived! South Africa’s first naturally-safe cleaning range formulated specifically for cleaning baby items and mess.

Mimu’s products include Hypoallergenic Laundry Liquid, Stain Remover, Bottle and Dish Wash Liquid, Toy Cleaner, Bath Cleaner, Floor Cleaner, and a Dummy Sanitizing Spray.

Products are formulated to specifically perform the tasks they are designed to do. Those little rings that form in the bottle from milk proteins – the bottle and dish washing liquid gets rid of them, as well as other baby-type dirt out of bottles, sippy cups, and little bowls.

The laundry liquid and stain remover are hypoallergenic, safe for babies’ sensitive skin, and developed to remove all the regular baby-related stains.

Mimu’s floor cleaner doesn’t leave a sticky or slippery residue, ensuring your floors are safe for playing and exploring.

These products are kind to the environment, vegan, and are never tested on animals.

All products are free of dangerous toxins and chemicals, including SLES, parabens, phosphates, formaldehyde, dyes and fragrances. Even the packaging is BPA free.

For more information, visit www.mimu.co.za.

www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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Did you know you’ll spend nearly a third of your life sleeping?

So make sure the bed you sleep on won’t only help you sleep more soundly, but will last a long, long time, keeping you in comfort whatever your size or your age. And who better to give you everything you need in a mattress than Edblo?

For nearly 90 years South Africans have trusted Edblo to give them the quality rest they need – visit an Edblo stockist near you and find out why!

“Why Edblo” statements:

• Developed and manufactured in South Africa since 1927 • Manufactured with tried and tested components • Great value for money • Excellent comfort • Trusted South African bed for more than 80 years • A good night’s sleep starts with Edblo

To locate your nearest stockist, contact Edblo on 011 309-4000 or visit

www.edblo.co.za

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How to improve your fertility We offer a range of fertility products, tools and information which are not just affordable, but also of the highest quality to assist you on your journey to conception of that little baby boy or girl of your dreams.

Here are some of the products we sell:

• Various fertility supplements for men and women • Ovulation predictor monitors and microscopes • Pre-Seed sperm friendly lubricant • SpermCheck fertility home test for men • Basal Body Thermometers (BBT) with free temperature chart • Softcups • FertiliTea for women • Naturone, a natural progesterone cream • Various pregnancy tests

. . . and more!

For more information visit

www.bouncingbean.co.za

or email us at info@bouncingbean.co.za Follow us on Twitter or our Facebook page to be instantly updated on specials and stock arrivals.

www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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BOOK REVIEW

Roald Dahl’s Marvellous Colouring-Book Adventure Roald Dahl Penguin Random House South Africa | R230.00 Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory, Charlie’s glorious golden ticket, the BFG’s magical dream jars and many other classic Roald Dahl scenes are all inside this beautiful, intricately illustrated colouring book.

With 45 stunning images to complete, all based around Dahl’s most beloved stories, this exquisite colouring book is perfect for children and adults alike.

Winnie-the-Pooh: The Best Bear in all the World AA Milne Penguin Random House South Africa | R240.00 Celebrate 90 years of Winnie-the-Pooh with The Best Bear in all the World, the official sequel to the original stories by AA Milne. With brand-new stories from Paul Bright, Brian Sibley, Kate Saunders and Jeanne Willis – each will transport you back into the Hundred Acre Wood for more adventures with Winnie-the-Pooh. With decorations by Mark Burgess, in the style of EH Shepard.

Knowledge Encyclopedia: Animal!

Penguin Random House South Africa | R330.00

Photo credits: Penguin Random House South Africa

From the wings of the almighty albatross to the deadly facts of the great white shark, Knowledge Encyclopedia: Animal! transports you into the jawdropping, heart-thumping, pulse-racing world of the animal kingdom. Exploring everything from habitats and ecosystems to senses and respiration, Knowledge Encyclopedia: Animal! is easy to follow and full of fun facts for kids. Bursting with amazing 3D images, the animals are brought to life, from the tiniest of crustaceans to the mightiest of mammals, in a brand new, all-encompassing animal expedition.

Bridget Jones’s Baby Helen Fielding Penguin Random House South Africa | R240.00 For the Moms out there! What a laugh! Bridget is back and doesn’t disappoint – she’s just as hilarious, and chaotic, as she careers towards her baby deadline and battles her loudly-ticking biological clock.

When she finally finds out she’s pregnant, in true Bridget style, nothing is straightforward – cheesy potato cravings, chaotic birth scans and childbirth classes, joy and despair, and a massive shadow hanging over her with one rather awkward question – ‘who is the father?’ www.babysandbeyond.co.za

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