Apocalypse Yesterday: Zine Sample

A P O C A L Y P S E Y E S T E R D A Y

Zine Group Nov 2011-Jan 2012

What happened?

Government—there wasn’t enough structure. People were apathetic concerning politics—there were some crazy ass laws that passed. There was lack of regulation. The government knew the new generation (us) becoming registered voters, didn’t care and so they took the chance to make laws to control the world.

Martial law passed—the military took over, declaring a ―Federal Emergency‖—like WTO here in Seattle. You couldn’t walk backwards, couldn’t hitchhike with your back to traffic, couldn’t walk with an ice cream cone in your back pocket on a Sunday, couldn’t spit. You’d get thrown in jail for everything. There wasn’t just gun control, but weapon control—everything from knives to potato launchers.

We lost even more money and our economy got worse.

There was globalization with banks and shit. Money went out of communities, fucked things up, and our communities became less community oriented.

They got rid of illegal immigrants—deported them— and we had gaps to fill. And it wasn’t like ―Hey we all have jobs now‖; jobs just didn’t get filled. Yard work, house cleaning, picking fruit, construction work, dump sites. El Pollo Loco closed. Society started to freak out and stink.

We lit our trash on fire and that’s how massive fires started and got out of control. There were lots of rats because of the garbage.

Diseases were everywhere from all the rodents and the dead bodies that had been left out in the streets. People tried figure things out and started to believe that we we’re doomed and became hysterical, saying ―There’s no other way.‖ They weren’t thinking logically.

A man behind the curtain decided to pass laws so we’d eat each other alive—no bombs needed. It’s a good way to destroy someone if you didn’t want it traced back to you. It was like high school drama among adults with power. Children got eaten—their bones were still soft. We survived—our bones are now broken, but together.

Jack    

         

Before, I quietly accepted whatever I was told .

-Now, I question everything.

Before, I did whatever I could to keep others happy.

-Now, I come first.

Before, I let my talents go to waste.

-Now, I use them daily.

Before, I stayed out of the public eye.

-Now, I do whatever I want without caring about what others think Before, I just did whatever I was told to do.

-Now, I make my own decisions.

Before, I would just go with the flow.

-Now, I plan ahead.

Before, I was depressed.

-Now, I’m pissed off.

Before, I cared way too much about other people’s feelings.

-Now I can be a bitch if I so choose.

Before, I had no friends (except Albert).

-Now, I still don’t (except Albert), but that’s okay by me.

Before, I was a ―Good Citizen‖.

-Now, there’s nothing left to be a citizen of.

Before, I was compliant.

-Now, I’m a fighter.

Before, I was content being unhappy -Now, I fight for what I want or need to be happy.

Before, I gave up on many things, everything actually.

-Now, the only thing I have left to give up is my life.

Before, I was a spirit, held down and told I was nothing, by the mediocre minds that had infiltrated my world.

-Now I am free to be great.

Darren I wake up to destruction on an empty street. An aftermath of something. I was knocked out. Usually city streets are loud, it was quiet. An eerie silence made only stranger by the smell of burnt rubber, musty iron, and smoke. There’s a pleasant breeze blowing not-so-pleasant dust everywhere.

My head pounding, I slowly get up and cut my palm on a shard of glass in the process, it’s everywhere. I feel alone, I feel confused. Then like a flashback my memories flood back… People going crazy everywhere. These idiots spread so much hysteria, everyone started to riot. One shot to kill is FEMA’s model, I don’t have a single bullet hole in my body, some fear crazed moron knocked me out with a glass bottle, probably beer. They must of thought I was dead, why shoot someone who’s already dead? The realization comes, I’m living in a police state. They’re in control now. Nearby there’s a water fountain. I stumble over to see if it works, it does. When I start to drink I can’t stop. I keep drinking for at least 5 minutes. When I’m finished, I stop and think; for a long time.

Jack “They’re dead or long gone” I told myself, hoping for the latter, more than I would usually let myself care. I held the burnt teddy bear close and wiped at tears as they started to form. I found him in a child’s room, in a house that had all but been destroyed by fire. Now I’m sitting on the front porch, sobbing over a child that I didn’t even know, and the sun was going down. We had wasted a lot of time here. Albert whined and stared up at me, his head on my knee. Sometimes I think he’s smarter than me.

I know we should stay put, because wandering around in the dark is not my strong suit. We will probably get lost or run into trouble, and I can’t shoot when I can’t see. But I can’t stay here. I want to go home or to base camp or whatever. I want a bed and food and electricity and artificial light. Albert wants to stay here for the night. He knows we should.

If we stay, he can sleep on the couch. An old, burnt up couch, but a couch none the less.

What dog wouldn’t want that? But I simply can’t do it. I can’t sleep in the house, where this child lived and , most likely, died. I don’t have the heart. “I’m sorry Al.” I say as I pick up my bag and my shotgun. Albert stays by my side as we walk away from the house. I have no doubt that he’s thinking about how much I suck. I’ll probably let him sleep with me to make up for it. “You know Al, I used to want kids. A whole houseful of them. Now I think I’d rather die. I wouldn’t be a good parent and this world is no place for children.” Albert knows this. I’m convinced he knows everything, including that it will take a good couple hours to get home. It wasn’t our house before, but I’ve done a lot to make it homey. It’s not fancy, but we have electricity, a working refrigerator, and everything else we need to keep us safe. What more could we want?

Together We meet up while we’re searching.

Randomly running into each other.

We ran into James in a porno shop.

Jack in the Ammo store.

Braxton destroying the last remaining dub step records and crying, ―No one will ever know!‖ (Braxton hated dub step).

Darren ran into us at the Space Needle, looking for other people and waiting near the heater, powered now by wind generators in the desert.

Most people were held up in the Key Arena arguing about what was going on while there’s anarchy in the streets because people blow.

We think we should not be around mass amounts of people.

We decide to go out to Snohomish—a small town, next to a military base and a Search and Rescue operation base.

Rather than argue, we found a conclusion and left their bullshit.

Rather than waste time, we travel Rather than being stupid and playing with pointless Q-tips and arguing about who’s in charge, we walk away.

Together, we are a melting pot of various bad-assery. A crack team. We are the Z team—the last. The A team—the first.

Together we’ve gathered enough food and looted lingerie, so we can still have our delicates.

Together we’ve decided to find others surviving, wary of the trouble they might bring, and the advantage of having them as friends.

Together we can provide for our own without the leaders.

We can make it and find more people who want to make it as individuals.

Apart we won’t last as long. We won’t have fun. We see it more as a game, at this point.

Together, we might find out secrets about each other.

Together, we might find irritation, betrayal, someone inside screwing us over.

Together it will be harder for some of us( i.e. being a girl amid a bunch of boys.)

Together it will be harder working as a group. There will always be people tired of being told what to do.

But we just might become friends.

Follow Me Group Prompt, Zine Group Nov-Jan, 2012

―Follow me,‖ said the leader. ―Because I’m smart. I know something. Follow me because you need to know what I know.‖ ―Fuck you,‖ said Darren. ―Can you just tell me instead of me following you?‖ asked James. ―It’s better if you see it, but you have to give up your guns.‖ ―How can we trust you.‖ ―Yeah, we can’t just trust anybody. People are going crazy.‖ Then he flips out a badge. He’s part of the militia. ―I’m on the peoples’ side. But I need to know I can trust you.‖ ―Just tell us already!‖ ―I don’t know if you believe me.‖ ―I don’t feel like we’re making progress.‖ ―For me to follow a guy like you, I’ll be very wary. I’ll have my hand on my gun the whole time.‖ ―Well, I trust Darren. And if I trust you, I’ll give you my gun if David can keep his.‖ The leader agrees. ―I won’t give you mine, and I won’t trust someone who would ask me to.‖ Jack does not want to go with this creep. ―I’m not going. Y’all can stay if me if you want, if not…then maybe I’ll see y’all again sometime.‖ We follow.

Jack walks in the other direction, Albert at her side.

A good leader doesn’t want followers to be defenseless. A good leader wants to listen to people who follow him. He wants his followers to listen to each other.

It’s funny that bad leaders are good at leading— intimidating, convincing their followers they’re the only ones in power—the source of all the group can accomplish. But of course the group is the source— and bad leaders don’t want the group to realize that.

Good leaders let their presence be felt but allow free choice. Good leaders allow people to know they’re still in control—are of some significance.

That they lead themselves but look to the leader for encouragement and the leader is more focused on keeping the group together.

Bad leaders use insults to reinforce behaviors.

Bad leaders create an enemy for their followers to be against, which allows them to unite people—but only to fight against something else. Bad leaders use fear—fear of death.

I don’t like following. Because most leaders are just idiots and I think I could do better—controlling my life and I feel stupid and weak giving that control up. You don’t feel like a person.

A good leader trusts a group and a bad leader doesn’t. And it’s hard to trust the group. And it’s hard for the group to trust the leader. Because the group looks up to the leader and if the leader does something negative, the group could topple.

The same could be said of groups. A good group won’t follow blindly. Good groups will ask questions and good leaders will answer them truthfully. None of the ―Because I said so.‖ bullshit. There has to be an exchange of trust. Bad leaders are afraid of their followers and have no trust.

We Build a City We build a city in a mountain valley with rivers on top of the graves of our ancestors and an adequate supply of animals so we can eat them, and good soil for vegetables. We find where all the unicorns are living. Where it doesn’t snow—there’s global warming now. We build a city away from our old city and the silver spoon people (who are dead) and their bunkers (which are empty). We build it away from our old city and its messed up president. Its contentment in mediocrity, its cops and people who want to take control – those false leaders. Our new city will be run by an elected leader –the people. Decisions will be made by me and you.

In our city, people will dance in the street, naked –even fat people. People volunteer to do whatever they want to do in the city; look for food, care for the sick, teach the children, help people. People make bonfires, dance, gamble, and drink, listen to music, go loot abandoned houses, have competitions, physical activities, sports, like basketball and cagefighting to play out our aggression. We got another coliseum going on –build a new Rome. In our city we forbid violence outside the cage, murder, tyranny, growing up; there's a difference between being responsible and never having any fun. We forbid betrayal.

We want fairness, vibrancy, and prosperity. Our

city is sparsely populated, original, and fresh.

We share everything –money is obsolete. We share each other, words of wisdom, the land, and oxygen. When strangers come, and they are foreign, we’re suspicious. We send them to a counsel to see what their motivations are. We don’t know if there are people in the world with bad intentions. If the strangers are bad, we put them in the cage fights. If they are good, we welcome them and have a giant feast and go back to bonfiring, help them establish a new life together.

Because people are people, there could be an uprising, there could be jealousy, or a shortage of materials. If there’s an uprising, we’ll ask them who they’re uprising against. We’ll ask them to go out to a weaponless battlefield and they won’t be able to leave the battlefield until they’re tired of fighting. If people don’t like each other, we will do what the Eskimos did—put them around a fire to curse at each other until they get tired or start laughing.

If we run out of material, we’ll search pantries to find resources or pick up on tents and move and go south to New Mexico. We might have to accept our city will never be perfect, eternal or permanent. As individuals in our city, we might feel like a god, or we might feel like a pissed off gorilla or one of the dead unicorns.

Our city may continue to crumble, explode, burn, thrive, grow, and regardless, we’ll keep living, keep going and keeping on.

I want to make a positive change.

I want to screw everything up So there’s total chaos. Panic in the streets.

I’ll think it’s funny. Then I could help rebuild The fallen society Of what we used to call Earth….