She Magazine — February 2011 by She Magazine

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See you next month!

Tina Sordellini Managing Executive Editor

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When I was 12 years old, I made the choice to try living in New Jersey for a year with my father, step-mother and little brothers. Twelve was a year of big changes for me. Aside from the terrible home life, schooling up north was probably the best thing that could ever happen to me. Since the schools were so much more advanced, I was afforded the ability to learn to play an instrument two years earlier there than I would have been able to in South Florida. My father refused to let me play the drums, because he said he didn’t want all that noise in the house when I was practicing. So, I paid him back by choosing the play the trumpet instead. To this day I still snicker to myself about the little paybacks I got in that year with that trumpet in the bedroom right next to his. Hang on…I have to snicker a little. Anyway, twelve was also the year I hit puberty and let me tell you it hit me hard. I was truly torn between the crush I had on my band teacher, who was the most physically beautiful man I have ever known, and on my music teacher, who was a truly beautiful woman inside and out. So torn was I that I decided to do the next best thing to choosing either one of them… fix them up together. I came up with any excuse I could possibly find to get them into the same room together, both in school and out, until they finally fell in love and got married. By the time that was accomplished, my home life had gotten worse than words could tell, so it was time for me to come back to Florida. I kept in touch with them for about fifteen years and then life happened and we lost touch. Today, I am able to look back at twelve and find some good memories, feeling like twelve was a year I accomplished something great. She turns twelve today and in these twelve years we have accomplished a great deal. But we are not finished. There is so much more ahead of us, so many women we need to keep reaching, so many women still on our wish-list for interviews, so many stories to tell. As a community, we have come so far in twelve years and we still have more to go before we get where we truly deserve to be. We’ll get there. And She will be there every step of the way. Thanks to you, our readers and advertisers, for being there for She for all these years and for your continuing support. Thanks to all our contributing writers and photographers who have given us all this great material! And a very special thanks to my business partner, Maria Espinal. She’s been by my side since 1998, as first my wife and then my best friend. No matter what has happened, I have always been able to count on her to be there, right beside me. She is both my biggest critic and my biggest supporter, in all aspects of my life. We’ve seen each other through ups and downs, but I wouldn’t trade a minute of it for anything in this world. I couldn’t do She without her. And if I tried, it wouldn’t look nearly as good.

MANAGING EXECUTIVE EDITOR

Tina Sordellini PUBLICITY SHE ESPAÑOL EXECUTIVE EDITOR

Maria Espinal ASSOCIATE EXECUTIVE EDITOR

Sandee Birdsong ASSOCIATE EDITORS

Marissa Cohen M. Patti Moss Shawn Nicholson Christina Radish Denise Warner CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

Marissa Cohen Verónica Espinal Anna Lepely, M.S. PHD Wendy P. Phillips Christina Radish The Village Sage Jowharah Sanders Tina Sordellini Denise Warner Donna Woessner CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS

Verónica Espinal • Yadira Claralt Diane Bradford • Angie Sowers Juan Saco Mironoff • Jennifer Maria Cordoba SALES ASSOCIATES

Maria Espinal • Bette Esposito ads@shemag.com DISTRIBUTION

Robin Rotellini SUBSCRIPTIONS

www.shemag.com EDITORIAL OFFICE

6511 Nova Drive, #173 Davie, FL 33317 954.354.9751 office info@shemag.com www.shemag.com SHE: WOMEN OWNED, WOMEN OPERATED, WOMEN EMPOWERED! The ideas and opinions expressed in She Magazine do not necessarily reflect opinions of Shemag, L.L.C., She Magazine, or of editors or staff. Publication of the name or photograph of any person or organization should not be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of that person or organization. All advertising subject to approval by She Magazine. She Magazine/Shemag, L.L.C. is not responsible for unauthorized use or copyright infringement as present in camera ready, client provided ads, nor is it liable for any loss or suit arising from submitted advertisement, copy, photography, or artwork. Reproduction of She Magazine, in whole or in part, is strictly prohibited without the express written consent of Shemag, L.L.C.

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20 FEATURES

DEPARTMENTS

18 JUDY GOLD

08 DIRECTOR’S CHAIR

“Their stories changed my life and made me feel so proud to be a part of such...”

12 MULTIMEDIA

Movies, Music, DVDs & TV

20 ON THE COVER Wanda Sykes

16 IN THE NEWS

24 DO YOU NEED A SEX COACH?

17 WHERE TO GO

Interview with Felice Newman

28 WINTER PARTY IS HERE! Your guide to the women’s events

30 12 LESBIAN COUPLES She Magazine celebrates their love!

22 SHE GIRL 25 DID YOU FACEBOOK ABOUT 26 JUST FOR FUN Valentine’s Day Gift Guide

38 SCOPES

FOLLOW SHE

SHE ESPANOL 32 NOTICIAS 33 SOY MUJER

PICTORIALS 04 SHE SCENE 14 KIND OF A DRAG 3

FACEBOOK.com (Search: She Mag) TWITTER.com/shemagazine MYSPACE.com/she_magazine M.ISSUU.com (Search: Shemagazine) Download the application on your android phone today. iPhone app coming soon!

> YOU CAN READ OUR FREE DIGITAL EDITION AT WWW.SHEMAG.COM

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The North American release of 21, the eagerly awaited sophomore album from British singer-songwriter Adele, happens on February 22. 21, is the follow up to Adele’s critically acclaimed, award winning debut album 19. Before returning home to work on her sophomore album Adele headlined the newly incarnated VH1 Divas Live. This new collection of songs showcases the growth of this incredible artist, who at the very young age of twenty two, exhibits the poise of a seasoned veteran. Adele’s music takes some new direction while staying true to her signature style.

E! brings viewers another adventure, Kourtney and Kim Take New York, as Kourtney and Kim Kardashian set their sights on opening a DASH boutique in New York City and take advantage of all the glitz, glam and flirty fun the city has to offer! In addition to expanding their lucrative DASH empire, the ladies step out to pursue dreams on their own. A nervous and excited Kourtney makes her acting debut in the long-running ABC daytime drama One Life to Live, and Kim, who has kept her singing voice under wraps until now, records a single produced by The Dream.

Aretha Franklin is one of the giants of soul music, and indeed of American pop as a whole. This month Aretha releases, Great American Songbook. With these songs by America’s greatest composers, Aretha Franklin paved the path to her own greatness. From standards to bebop to gospel and blues, these recordings are indelible snapshots of a special time in the career of a musical legend; a portrait, if you will, of the artist as a young woman. This stand-alone CD features 18 classic songs by Cole Porter, Irving Berlin, the Gershwin Brothers, Oscar Hammerstein, Johnny Mercer, Hank Williams and more.

If you are into computer gaming, check out a little ditty called LifeQuest from Big Fish. While not necessarily the most advanced sim game out there, what we were most impressed by was the ability to choose the sex of your mate, making same-sex love, marriage and even having children together as simple as a click of the button. The game also allows you to create the character you want to be, butch, femme or anywhere in between. Along the way, you are challenged by people from your high school days to outdo them and their goals in life.

Pop-punkers, Sick Of Sarah, released their newest album, 2205, on February 1. The allfemale five-piece’s sound has garnered comparisons to The Breeders and Sleater Kinney. The album includes ten new songs, all of them alternating between wild punk rave-ups and super-catchy pop songs, but never sacrificing any of the band’s signature energy and enthusiasm. After touring with the band, singer and guitarist Susanna Hoffs of The Bangles had nothing but superlatives to say. Similarly, Nancy Wilson of Heart also had great things to say, “…This is a true working band who sing, write, and play for real…”

In the new legal dramedy, Harry’s Law, starring Kathy Bates, a curmudgeonly ex-patent lawyer is abruptly fired from her blue chip law firm, forcing her to search for a fresh start. She finds it when her world unexpectedly collides, literally, with a kind-hearted college student and a legal hotshot accidentally hits her while driving. Inspired by Harry’s no-nonsense understanding of the law, he decides to work with her. The three unlikely but kindred spirits, along with the help of Harry’s shoe-savant assistant, Jenna are now ready for whatever walks in through the doors of their unique establishment. Airs Mondays at 10pm on NBC.

[

NOT TO BE MISSED: FRANKIE & ALICE, starring Halle Berry, is a moving psychological drama based on the harrowing true story of Frankie Murdoch, a woman suffering with multiple personality disorder in early 1970s Los Angeles. Check around for screenings and upcoming DVD release.

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IN THE NEWS >REP. RANDOLPH FILES BILL TO END EMPLOYMENT DISCRIMINATION IN FLORIDA Representative Scott Randolph (D-Orlando) filed a bill that aims to bring jobs to Florida. The Florida Competitive Workforce Act (H.B. 361) would prohibit all forms of discrimination in the workplace, including sexual orientation and gender identity. Major corporations have long known that diversity is good for business. Today, eighty-seven percent of Fortune 500 Companies include sexual orientation provisions in their anti-discrimination policies and nearly half include gender identity and expression. “In a time of serious economic hardship, it is imperative that we do everything we can to encourage economic growth and investment,” Representative Scott Randolph said. “This bill promotes smart business practices that will attract employers to our state and create jobs. The Florida Competitive Workforce Act seeks to move Florida forward.” In Florida, Pepsico, Wells Fargo, JetBlue, BlueCross BlueShield of Florida, and other billiondollar corporations have joined with Equality Florida in the Equality Means Business project, an effort to spotlight major employers in Florida that have adopted comprehensive non-discrimination polices and have demonstrated their commitment to valuing and pro-actively including all employees. "Passage of this bill will dramatically improve Florida’s national and international reputation as a welcoming and inclusive place to live, work and visit." said Mallory Wells, public policy director for Equality Florida. "We're proud to work with Rep. Randolph, one of our strongest champions in Tallahassee, to promote the Competitive Workforce Act," Florida law currently fails to protect all Floridians against workplace discrimination. The Florida Competitive Workforce Act will not only ensure equal protection for all Floridians, but it will also demonstrate that Florida understands that diversity brings the skills, perspective and other assets that are essential to establishing a competitive workforce.

To endorse the Florida Competitive Workforce Act visit eqfl.org/competitiveworkforce.

HRC: DADT IMPLEMENTATION PLAN MUST BE EXECUTED EXPEDITIOUSLY HRC called on the Pentagon to expeditiously carry out the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” repeal implementation plan laid out on January 28 by Under Secretary Clifford Stanley and Gen. James Cartwright. It appears that training could begin in a matter of months, consistent with President Obama’s timeline commitment of months, not years. HRC also noted that some issues remain unaddressed that will impact the lives of gay, lesbian and bisexual service members including benefits parity and equal opportunity protections. On benefits issues, the memo does not go far enough in calling for parity in benefits that could be accomplished through revised regulations that add same-sex committed partners to the definitions of “dependent,” “family member,” or other similar terms. Such a step would be consistent with President Obama’s June 2009 memorandum that all federal agencies take steps to extend benefits equally to lesbian and gay employees, where permitted by law. The memo also states that the Military Equal Opportunity program will not be amended to prohibit discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation, which has been essential in successful equal opportunity policies for other types of discrimination.

“GAY CHARACTERS HAVE GONE FROM ONE-TIME GUEST STARS, WHISPERED TRAGEDIES, AND SILLY SIDEKICKS TO NOT JUST AN ACCEPTED BUT AN EXPECTED PART OF TEENCENTRIC TELEVISION. THE CHANGE REFLECTS REAL TEENS’ LIVES: THE PERCENTAGE OF SCHOOLS WITH GAY-STRAIGHT ALLIANCE CLUBS IS UP FROM 25 PERCENT IN 2001 TO 45 PERCENT TODAY, INDICATING THE INCREASINGLY VISIBLE ROLE THAT GAY KIDS ARE PLAYING IN THE HIGH SCHOOL LANDSCAPE. WITH THE AVERAGE COMING-OUT AGE NOW 16 (DOWN FROM 19–23 IN THE ’80S), ACCORDING TO THE NATIONAL GAY AND LESBIAN TASK FORCE, IT ONLY MAKES SENSE FOR TEENS ON TV TO TACKLE THE ISSUE. ‘WITH OUR MILLENNIAL AUDIENCE, IT’S WHAT THEY EXPECT TO SEE,’ SAYS ABC FAMILY EXEC VP OF PROGRAMMING KATE JUERGENS. ‘DON’T ASK DON’T TELL WAS SUCH A VESTIGE OF AN OLDER GENERATION.’ THANKS TO GLEE AND ITS 14.1 MILLION VIEWERS, GAY TEEN CHARACTERS ARE NOW REACHING MORE EYES THAN EVER, AS KURT’S RUN-IN WITH BULLYING HAS DOMINATED THE FIRST HALF OF THE MUSICAL’S SECOND SEASON.” —Part of Entertainment Weekly’s Special Report on Gay Teens, Jan 28th issue.

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THE FIRST OF ITS KIND NOW OPEN TO THE PUBLIC IN SAN FRANCISCO Internationally renowned as a center for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender culture, San Francisco now welcomes yet another groundbreaking queer institution: The GLBT History Museum. A project of the GLBT Historical Society, an archives and research center established in 1985, the new museum opened on January 13th and it is the first of its kind in the United States. “A quarter century after the founding of the GLBT Historical Society, we’re proud to open a museum to showcase our community’s history,” said Paul Boneberg, executive director of the Historical Society. “The GLBT History Museum is in the heart of the Castro, a neighborhood visited not only by locals, but also by tens of thousands of tourists every year who come in search of queer culture. At our museum, they’ll discover treasures from our archives that reflect fascinating stories spanning nearly a century of GLBT life. We have gone all out to create a museum as rich, diverse and surprising as

the GLBT community itself. Visitors are sure to be moved, enlightened and entertained.” Located at 4127 18th St., San Francisco, the museum includes 1,600 square feet of gallery and program space built to the specifications of the Historical Society, with custom fixtures, lighting and multimedia installations reflecting professional standards. Funding has come from Levi’s, the City of San Francisco, Castro district merchants, and numerous other sponsors and individual donors. The museum will feature two debut exhibitions: In the main gallery, “Our Vast Queer Past: Celebrating GLBT History,” curated by historians Gerard Koskovich, Don Romesburg and Amy Sueyoshi; and in the front gallery, “Great Collections of the GLBT Historical Society Archives.” Regular hours for The GLBT History Museum are Wednesday through Saturday, 11A to 7P, Sundays noon 5P. Admission: $5; free for members. For more information visit them online at www.glbthistory.org.

WHAT

GLBT HISTORY MUSEUM

TO DO TO GO

WHERE

RENAISSANCE FESTIVAL Feb 12 - Mar 13 Quiet Waters Park 401 South Powerline Road Deerfield Beach • 954.776.1642 COMMIT2LOVE COMMITMENT CEREMONY & VALENTINE’S RECEPTION AND DANCE Feb 13 • 6P Jungle Island • 1111 Parrot Jungle Trial Miami Beach • 305.400.7239 commit2love.com FORTITUDE WEEKEND Feb 17 - 21 Various Locations • Ft. Lauderdale, FL fortitudeweekend.com AMOUREUX: PHOTOGRAHS BY RENÉE JACOBS • GRAND OPENING February 18 • 7 - 10P Artspace Magq Gallery Miami, FL 33176 • Runs through Mar 20 305.282.9154 • Artspacemagq.com FT. LAUDERDALE LGBT WEDDING EXPO Feb 20 • 1P - 4P Hyatt Regency Pier 66 2301 SE 17 St • Ft. Lauderdale, FL samelovesamerights.com TASTE OF THE BEACH Feb 23 • 6P - 9P • Lauderdale-by-the-sea 954.776.1000 • lbts.com SOUTH BEACH WINE & FOOD FESTIVAL February 24 - 27 sobewineandfoodfest.com • 305.348.9463 VINTAGE SHOW Feb 26 - 27 Convention Center • 650 Okeechobee Blvd Palm Beach, FL 33401 • 561.483.4047 OUT GIRLS MOVIE NITE Feb 25 • 7P And Then Came Lola Stonewall Library • 1300 E Sunrise Blvd Fort Lauderdale, FL 33304 954.763.8565 • stonewall-library.org WOMEN'S WINTER PARTY March 2 - 7 Various locations • Miami Beach, FL winterparty.com

? LEFT TO RIGHT: Museum front • Part of the main gallery at the GLBT History Museum. On display: “Our Vast Queer Past: Celebrating GLBT History.” • As an example of the institution’s textiles collection, the museum features the pantsuits worn by pioneering lesbian activists Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon when they became the first same-sex couple to wed when California briefly legalized such marriages in 2008. • The “Great Collections From the GLBT Historical Society Archives” show includes a selection of the personal belongings of Harvey Milk, the first openly gay elected official in San Francisco. Milk was assassinated in 1978. All rights reserved by GLBT Historical Society SHE -

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BY: DONNA WOESSNER

JUDY GOLD WILL BE HEADING TO SOUTH FLORIDA FOR THE FORTITUDE WEEKEND’S “FORTLAUGH” COMEDY NIGHT ON FEBRUARY 19, 2011. FOR INFORMATION AND TICKETS, VISIT FORTITUDEWEEKEND.COM.

When you hear, “Lesbian, Jewish, stand-up comedienne,” only a very few women come to mind. Add in, “Actress, Daytime Emmy Award winner,” and, “tall,” and one immediately thinks of Judy Gold. We have watched Judy’s career take her from small comedy stages, to behindthe-scenes on The Rosie O’Donnell Show, as writer and producer, and in front of the cameras on Margaret Cho’s All American Girl. It was fun to watch as she interviewed unsuspecting moviegoers on HBO at the Multiplex. Yes, that WAS her! Judy also let us peek into her private family life in the R Family Cruise documentary and we have been Jewish kin ever since. We recently had the opportunity to catch up with her on being a Jewish mom, what she likes to do best, and her stay in Fort Lauderdale. I DON’T REMEMBER WHEN I FIRST REALIZED THAT I KNEW YOU WERE A LESBIAN. YOU CAME OUT? WHEN DID THAT HAPPEN? WHO SAW YOU?

There were lots of people there and they cheered! Fireworks went off and then I got a toaster oven and a fanny pack. THE R FAMILY CRUISE DOCUMENTARY WAS SUCH A POSITIVE MESSAGE FOR LGBTQ FAMILIES EVERYWHERE. HOW DID BEING A PART OF THAT EXPERIENCE CHANGE WHO YOU WERE AS A FAMILY AT THAT TIME?

That cruise was an amazing experience on so

many levels. It was extraordinary to see so many LGBTQ families in one place. For some of them, it was the safest place they had ever been. The ship’s crew said that we had the best behaved children they had ever had on the boat. I said it was because all of these kids were wanted - not one was a mistake. AS YOUR KIDS GET OLDER, HOW AWARE ARE THEY OF WHO THEIR FUNNY, JEWISH, GAY MOM IS?

Are you crazy? I am sooo uncool and unfunny— but I am a Jew. YOU INTERVIEWED MORE THAN 50 JEWISH WOMEN BEFORE WRITING YOUR ONEWOMAN SHOW 25 QUESTIONS FOR A JEWISH MOTHER. WHAT IS THE BIGGEST MISCONCEPTION ABOUT BEING A JEWISH MOTHER? WHAT QUESTION NEVER GOT ASKED THAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO SHARE WITH THE NON-JEWS?

Before I interviewed these women, I had lots of preconceived notions, which were all dispelled after the interviews. The women were all very educated, incredibly self-aware and extremely unique. I thought they would all be like my mother. Boy, was I wrong. Their stories changed my life and made me feel so proud to be a part of such a remarkable group of people. IS THERE ANY PART OF YOUR LIFE IN WHICH BEING A JEW DOESN’T HAVE AN EFFECT? JEWISH MOM, JEWISH DAUGHTER, JEWISH

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LESBIAN, JEWISH COMIC…IS ANYTHING NOT ABOUT BEING JEWISH?

Hmm. It’s funny because people have asked me if I’m more Jewish or gay—which happens to be a really stupid question. But the truth is, being Jewish is all of who I am, it’s how I think, how I talk, what I eat, how I look. Being gay is a part of who I am. It’s who I love. So the answer to your question is no! YOU’VE WORKED IN ALL DIFFERENT KINDS OF MEDIA. WHICH IS YOUR FAVORITE?

There is nothing like live performance. Nothing compares to being on stage in a theater in front of an audience. WHAT PROJECTS ARE YOU WORKING ON?

My new one woman show: It’s Judy’s Show - My Life as a Sitcom, is coming to NY. I’m doing a show on Sirius/XM radio called “Hatched By Two Chicks” which is all about Gay parenting (and anything else I feel like talking about), I’m on Tru TV’s “World’s Dumbest,” and I’m a regular on The Joy Behar Show. I’m working on another TV project as well. FORT LAUDERDALE IS VERY EXCITED ABOUT HAVING YOU BE INCLUDED IN FORTITUDE WEEKEND, THE FIRST LGBTQ BENEFIT WEEKEND PRODUCED IN THIS AREA. WHAT ARE YOUR PLANS FOR THAT WEEKEND?

I’m bringing my girlfriend and we are so excited! It’s going to be so much fun and the best part will be not being in NYC in February!

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BY: DENISE WARNER

WANDA SYKES KEEPS US LAUGHING WITH HER DRY DELIVERY AND HILARIOUS PERSPECTIVE ON EVERYTHING FROM HER FAMILY LIFE AND HER WIFE AND BABIES TO HER POLITICAL ACTIVISM. OUTSPOKEN, HONEST, DOWN TO EARTH, WANDA KEEPS IT REAL AND THAT JUST MAY BE WHAT MAKES HER SO FUNNY!

DO PEOPLE EXPECT YOU TO BE FUNNY ALL

IT’S LIKE THEY WANT THE ‘STAGE PERSONA’

THE TIME?

ALL THE TIME?

Yes. All the time. Funny and crazy and like...in

Yeah, oh yes.

your face! People have asked me to curse

DO YOU FIND MOST OF THE ROLES YOU’RE

‘em out, and stuff. It’s nuts. I mean, seriously,

OFFERED ARE DIRECTLY RELATED TO HOW

if I really behaved like that, I’d be put away!

YOU ARE ON STAGE?

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“ IT’S NOT LIKE SOME BIG

RAINBOW FLAG DROPS DOWN AND TECHNO MUSIC COMES ON FOR THE GAY PORTION OF THE SHOW. IT’S JUST PART OF IT NOW, YOU KNOW?”

Oh gosh, yeah. Let’s put it this way, I’ve never gotten a job and they say, “Can you tone it down?” DO YOU FEEL LIKE YOUR EXPECTED TO INCLUDE THE “GAY” THING IN YOUR ACT NOW?

Um, I don’t know if it’s expected, but now it’s really just a part of it. I talk about my family, I just talk about it very matter of factly, I say “my wife, my kids.” It’s not like some big rainbow flag drops down and techno music comes on for the gay portion of the show. It’s just part of it now, you know? HAS THE GAY STUFF BECOME THE FUNNIER STUFF IN YOUR ACT?

(Laughs) Well, you know...everyone loves a good d*ck joke, too. THEY DO! WHEN IN DOUBT...GO WITH A D*CK JOKE.

(Laughs) Right? YOU’VE BECOME SORT OF AN ACTIVIST BY BEING PART OF “WE GIVE A DAMN” CAMPAIGN AND ALSO WITH A PSA FOR GLSEN’S “THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK” CAMPAIGNWHAT KIND OF EFFECT DO YOU THINK HAVING CELEBRITIES BE A PART OF THESE CAMPAIGNS HAS ON PEOPLE?

I think the celebrity ‘status’ gives it awareness. It’s a recognizable face that will create awareness—at least, that was my approach. It’s something I strongly believe in and if I could use my face or my voice to make people talk about it, make them aware, I am more than happy to do it. But I think when celebrities get on their soap boxes and get preachy, I don’t think it’s as effective. It has to be something you’re passionate about. IN 2009, YOU WERE THE FIRST AFRICAN AMERICAN WOMAN AND THE FIRST OPENLY GAY PERSON TO BE THE FEATURED ENTERTAINER AT THE WHITE HOUSE CORRESPONDENTS ASSOCIATION DINNER. HOW DID YOU HANDLE THAT, KNOWING IT WAS GOING DOWN IN HISTORY? DID YOU FEEL LIKE IT WAS A JOB WELL DONE WHEN IT WAS ALL OVER?

I did! I felt really good about it. What’s funny is that the babies were born in late April and [the dinner] was in May, so we had just gotten them home and then I had to go off and do this. My wife and the babies came with me to D.C., so

literally, I got off stage once the dinner was over, I went upstairs to my hotel room and we were changing diapers! I did go out later, I have some friends there and we did celebrate a little, have a drink and stuff. But then it was back to the babies, you know? That was about it. I could hear that chapter close as soon as it was finished. It was more like, “Oh, tomorrow is Mother’s Day, how about that?! Yay!” (Laughs) SPEAKING OF THAT, DO YOU FIND IT SOMETIMES HARD TO GO ON STAGE WHEN YOU’D RATHER BE HOME WITH YOUR FAMILY?

Oh no, no, no, it’s never hard to be away! (Laughs) I ain’t gonna lie, I look forward to seeing my calendar fill up with work! It’s like, “Ooo look at that, that’s nice, I can sleep in, eat whatever want, whenever I want and be away from those smelly diapers...this is nice, like a mini vacation.” (Laughs) HOW ABOUT BEFOREHAND? WHEN YOU’RE GETTING READY TO GO ON TOUR, DO YOU HAVE TO TAKE TIME TO PREPARE AND WRITEAND REWRITE?

Nah, because I’m always writing, like every day it seems like something will happen, either at home or on the news and I’ll think about it. I just jot it down or put a note in my phone. Then right before a tour, I’ll go into a club and try the stuff out, see what works and save the keepers. WE’VE READ SOME DIFFERENT INFORMATION REGARDING THE TALK SHOW ON FOX, SO WHAT IS THE OFFICIAL SCOOP? IS IT COMING BACK?

(Sighs) No, no, that’s off. I THOUGHT THAT WAS THE PERFECT FORMAT FOR A SHOW, IT WAS A TALK SHOW, YET IT WAS FUNNY AND LAID BACK - IT FELT LIKE IT WAS JUST HAVING A DRINK WITH FRIENDS.

Yeah, I know and that’s exactly what I wanted. Those people on the show, my co-hosts, those are really my friends. Keith Robinson is one of my best friends, he opens for me on tour and Portia- we’re buddies, we still hang out, you know, trips to Fire Island! (Laughs) YOU’VE WORKED IN THEATER, TV, MOVIES AND HAVE HAD SUCH SUCCESS, BUT WAS THERE EVER A TIME SOMEONE TOLD YOU SHE -

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WOULDN’T MAKE IT IN THIS BUSINESS?

(Long pause) Well, no, you know what, I don’t remember anyone saying “You’re not going to make it”, no, I don’t remember people saying that. Well- maybe my family! No, they were more like, thinking I was crazy leaving a good job to pursue this career but they never said I wouldn’t make it. But, hey you know, there were some nights when you get on stage and its not a good night and you think “What am I doing? I should go back to my government job!” But you know, I’m so passionate about it and I just stayed at it. And the next show was better. Ok, two or three shows later, it was better! (Laughs) But you know, it got better. I love it, love what I do. HAS COMING OUT HAD ANY NEGATIVE REPERCUSSIONS IN YOUR CAREER?

No, I can’t think of one negative thing - it was just a great time and it was organic. I wasn’t out there making some big statement, like “Hey, guess what, everybody?!” There was something going on in our country that directly affected me and so it just made sense. It was a perfect time. It all made sense. AS WE CELEBRATE NATIONAL WOMEN’S HISTORY MONTH IN MARCH, ARE THERE ANY WOMEN WHO HAVE LEFT A MARK ON YOUR LIFE, EITHER IN HISTORY OR ON A PERSONAL LEVEL?

Well, my mother, physically left a few marks on me! (Laughs) Okay, career wise, I’d have to say Moms Mabley. Jackie Moms Mabley. She was a comedian back when I was a girl. And Coretta Scott King. Oh, the list is long. If I start naming women, I’m gonna leave someone out and feel bad. TRUE, TRUE, OKAY. YOU ARE COMING TO MIAMI BEACH IN MARCH. WILL WE SEE SOME OF THE I’MA BE ME STUFF OR DO YOU HAVE ALL NEW MATERIAL?

Oh, I’ll still have some of the Im’a Be Me stuff, because that’s the wife and kids and my life, but I update it and I do have new stuff, too, so it’ll be good. You can catch Wanda on March 4 at the Jacke Gleason Fillmore Theater. For info and tickets, visit www.southbeachcomedyfestival.com.

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OCCUPATION: logistics

YOUR HOUSE IS ON FIRE. BESIDES A LOVED ONE, WHAT IS THE

I THINK OUR COMMUNITY NEEDS: People

specialist by day, fashion designer by night. and organizations like NVEEE to make sure our neighborhoods and schools are safe place for kids to live and learn without fear of bullying or violence. DREAM JOB: A fashion designer with my own line of clothing & accessories. DREAM GIRL: A confident, intelligent, open minded woman with a great sense of humor, a kind heart, and a thirst for adventure. I like a classy lady that’s not afraid to get her hands dirty and dares to be different. She can be nice but loves to be naughty. MY MOTHER THINKS I: may not make it into heaven. MY PETS: I’d like one but unfortunately, I just don’t have the time right now. TURN-ONS: Uniqueness, self confidence, individual sense of style and a sexy walk TURN-OFFS: Judgmental people, closed minds. MY BEST QUALITY: Sense of Humor.

INTIMATE OBJECT YOU’D GRAB?

I HAVE A WEAKNESS FOR:

Jeeps, cute chics driving Jeeps and White

I LIKE TO WEAR: Anything

My iPod Touch. by my favorite designer...Me.

WHAT BREAKFAST CEREAL BEST DESCRIBES YOU? Fruit Loops.

I’m colorful, well rounded, a little hard but really sweet & a little fruity. Behaving Badly. THE LAST THING I OUT ON MY IPOD WAS: DJ Pride’s Podcast & The Joann Fabrics App. THE LAST BOOK I READ WAS: Gods

IF MY LIFE WAS MADE INTO A MOVIE, MY PART WILL BE PLAYED BY:

A Computer Animated Me.

Going back to school at the ripe old age of 30-something. MY FAVORITE FLOWER: Cactus. MY FAVORITE QUOTE: “The absence of evidence is not the evidence of absence.” MY GREATEST ACCOMPLISHMENT:

CELEBRITY’S BUTT I’D MOST LIKE TO SQUEEZE:

THE STRANGEST PLACE I’VE EVER BEEN NAKED:

Chocolate Macadamia Nut Cookies. SENSITIVE BODY PART: My head (the shaved part).

college figure drawing/sculpting class.

IF YOU COULD HAVE ONE SUPER POWER, WHAT WOULD IT BE

MANICURE?

AND WHY?: Teleportation.

MOST MEMORABLE DATE: A

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In front of a

FRENCH FRIES, FRENCH VANILLA, FRENCH TOAST OR FRENCH

I could travel the world for free. I’d never get stuck in traffic and if I get into trouble, poof! I’m gone.

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Erika Norell.

THE CARTOON CHARACTER I AM MOST LIKE: Brock Sampson.

French Vanilla (with a slice of sweet potato pie). surprise paintballing date. SECRET FETISH: I love it when a woman strokes my ego.

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BY: MARIA ESPINAL

Did the title sound like a question you don’t need to answer? Did it make you think twice about if you do or don’t need a sex coach? Just like politics and religion, sex is such a complex topic who knows who has the right answer to every question. What we can definitely know is if we are satisfied (or not) with our current sex life. Do you need help from an expert? And if you did, would you really admit it? Would you admit to your girlfriend’s face that what she is doing is not really cutting it for you in bed? In the search for some answers, we recently spoke to Felice Newman, a sex educator and a somatic coach who works with couples and individuals. She is the author of The Whole Lesbian Sex Book: A Passionate Guide for All of Us and is at work on a new book for lesbian, bisexual and queer women couples. As publisher of Cleis Press since 1980, Felice Newman has developed and edited hundreds of books on sexuality and gender. She currently lives with her partner in the San Francisco Bay area.

YOU FOUND THAT MOST LESBIAN COUPLES ARE HAPPY WITH THEIR SEX LIFE?

I think there’s a huge range among lesbians. What I can say is this: the lesbians who are curious about sex, talking about sex, learning about sex, reading books and magazine articles about sex, attending workshops about sex, watching DVDs of other lesbians having sex, and most of all prioritizing sex are happier with their sex lives than lesbians who do none of those things. AT WHAT POINT IN THE RELATIONSHIP IS IT THE RIGHT TIME TO SEE A SEX THERAPIST OR COACH?

If you are not completely satisfied with your sex life and you do not know how to change that, it’s time to investigate a solution. It doesn’t matter if you have been together three months or three decades. If you find you have a problem that you and your partner cannot solve, find someone to help you solve it. You can start by reading books—I have suggestions on my website, felicenewman.com. Talk to friends whom you know have good sex lives. WHAT’S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A SEX

THROUGHOUT THE RESEARCH YOU HAVE DONE AND THE WORKSHOPS YOU DO, HAVE

THERAPIST AND A SEX COACH?

I have different training and a really different SHE -

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way of working with clients. Coaching is oriented to problem solving: Your sex life is like this, you want it like that, let’s get you there. WHY IS IT THAT AFTER THE FIRST 2-3 YEARS, AN AVERAGE COUPLE’S SEX LIFE GOES DOWN?

I don’t know that it’s true that an average couple’s sex life goes down in 2-3 years. I try to avoid generalities. What is absolutely true is that we as a culture believe that sex fades after a few years and so we act (or don’t act) accordingly. I would like to see lesbians speaking about sex in long-term relationships as something they expect—and even insist upon. WE ALWAYS HEAR ABOUT “SPICING UP” THE SEX LIFE. ARE HAVING OPEN RELATIONSHIPS OR THREESOMES SAFE WAYS TO SPICE UP A COUPLE’S RELATIONSHIP?

Both of those certainly can spice things up! But are they safe? That depends on the individuals, what they are comfortable with and how good are they are at communicating their needs, wants, boundaries and limits. There’s a great book called Opening Up by Tristan Taormino— the authority on the subject, in my opinion. My partner and I occasionally invite an extra partner (or two) into our sex play. We both find it really hot.

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WHAT’S THE BEST WAY TO TALK TO OUR PARTNER WITHOUT HURTING THEIR FEELINGS IF WE ARE NOT BEING SEXUALLY SATISFIED?

Don’t lay blame. Speak positively: “I’d really like your tongue on the shaft of my clit. But I need firm, steady strokes to come—and please don’t stop once I start moaning” will yield a more positive result than “I hate when you change what you’re doing just when I’m about to come.” WHAT SHOULD WE BASE A GOOD AND HEALTHY SEX LIFE ON WHEN EVERY WOMAN HAS DIFFERENT NEEDS?

Thank you. That’s such a great question. A healthy sex life is one in which you are authentic with yourself and your partners in being thoroughly sexually satisfied—and delighted. That would also mean you are authentically interested in satisfying—and delighting—your partners. WHAT ABOUT SEX WHEN YOU ARE PHYSICALLY LIMITED, BECAUSE OF AN ILLNESS, OVERWEIGHT, ETC. HOW SHOULD WE EXPLORE WORKING AROUND LIMITATIONS?

Be creative. There is always—let me say that twice—there is always a way to generate erotic pleasure and to be satisfied. THERE ARE WOMEN, MOSTLY BUTCH, WHO GET PLEASURE BY GIVING IT TO HER PARTNER AND DON’T LIKE TO BE CARESSED, TOUCHED OR RECEIVE ORAL SEX, BUT HER PARTNER WANTS TO. WHAT CAN YOU SUGGEST TO THAT COUPLE?

I love talking to butches about receptive pleasure: what feels good to them, what doesn’t, what kind of sexual attention fits with their image of themselves and what doesn’t. I’m butch and I get it. So I’m curious: if that butch strapped

on a big c*ck and her partner got down on her knees and told her how much she wanted to please her and combined fellatio (oral sex performed upon the p*nis or dildo) with the occasional licks of her labia, all while stroking that big strap-on, might that butch have a different experience? My interest is in everyone having exactly what they want, not trying to talk someone into wanting something that doesn’t fit. And not trying to talk someone into settling for less. WE RECENTLY POSTED ON FACEBOOK ABOUT WOMEN FAKING ORGASMS. HAVE YOU FOUND THAT LESBIANS FAKE ORGASMS, TOO?

I do think that happens, less so than with heterosexual women, I’d imagine. WHAT WOULD BE THE REASONS A GAY WOMAN WOULD FAKE AN ORGASM? AREN’T LESBIANS SUPPOSED KNOW THE RIGHT SPOTS?

We have a better idea of where they are! Seriously, everyone likes to be touched / licked / penetrated differently. So if you need a specific kind of stimulation to get you over the top, tell your partner. If there are lesbians faking it, I think it might also be because they are overly concerned with taking to long to reach orgasm. Too long for whom? If it takes 30 minutes of perfect clit stimulation, with just the right touch in just the right spot, for you to reach orgasm, you’re fine. Enjoy the attention. Meanwhile, thinking about taking too long will take you out of your body and your sensations and make it really hard to come. You deserve pleasure.

RESEARCH FOR HER NEW BOOK, VISIT SURVEYMONKEY.COM/S/LESBIANCOUPLES. COUPLES OF 5+ YEARS ARE INVITED TO FILL

Terry Yes Tami So weren‘t they talking about straight women, lol. Honestly have never had to fake one in my life! Daphney I’m not into faking, because at the end of the day, it’s not benefiting me or the individual. Why should I allow someone to walk away feeling like they’ve done something for me when in all actuality I did something for your ego. Sorry, can’t do it. Chaepin All of mine were 100% real. Meg As a very young adult, I faked them all the time with guys when I was trying to be straight. Never since I’ve been with women, though. Trish @ meg I’m right with you. Now that I’m with women there’s no reason to. She Mag I think there are many reasons why a woman wouldn’t be able to reach an orgasm, regardless of sexual orientation. Kim Ok She Mag, I know you are trying to clean this up. But really? The more I think about it, not only did those poor women have to fake orgasms, they weren’t straight at all. Oh no, they were poor closeted lesbians! Crystal I never got caught. I can fake it pretty darn good. Miamis L Word This is a very interesting article ALL women should read “all cumming for women is not easy whether you are straight or gay. It takes a lot of energy and concentration.” Continue reading on Examiner.com

OUT A CONFIDENTIAL, ANONYMOUS QUESTIONNAIRE.

HOW DOES YOUR HEALTH AFFECT YOUR SEXUAL LIFE AND HOW IS BEING SEXUALLY ACTIVE CONNECTED TO HAVING GOOD HEALTH?

This is a big subject. Health affects our sex lives in many ways, the biggest being how much energy we have for anything fun or pleasurable. It’s hard to want sex if you are in a lot of pain. As your question implies, sexual pleasure will support your health and well-being. Sex will relieve stress, help you sleep, and pump endorphins throughout your system. WHEN CAN WE EXPECT YOUR NEW BOOK AND A VISIT TO SOUTH FLORIDA?

My (next) book will be out in 2012 — and I’d love to come to South Florida!

IF YOU’D LIKE TO PARTICIPATE IN FELICE’S

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SHE MAG Did you ever get caught having a fake orgasm? Studies indicate that 70% of women fake orgasms. Have you?

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She Mag

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Fresh off the presses is Jude Schell’s new book, HER SWEET SPOT—101 SEXY WAYS TO FIND AND PLEASE IT. This book is definitly h.o.t. as Jude invites the reader to open all senses to the art of lovemaking. With explicit language and sensual/pasionate photos, reading the book together can get you started for what will become a great time. Spank, Show. Demonstrate on Her Lips What You Want to do to Her P*ssy. Nips. Toolbox. Submission. Available in hardcover and kindle ebook. $9.21 - $18.99 • shemag.com Reprinted with permission from Her Sweet Spot: 101 Sexy Ways to Find and Please It by Jude Schell, copyright © 2010. Published by Celestial Arts, a division of Random House. Photo credit: Janette Valentine © 2010

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I know this might look like Wonder Woman’s bracelet, but it’s the 4I TORQ. Luxurious, jewelry-quality wristband transforms the iPod Nano into an elegant watch. Listen to music on-the-go with full access to all Nano functions and it’s compatible with Bluetooth headphone dongles. Available in colored aluminum, stainless steel and titanium finishes. $49.95 - $250 • 4iConcepts.com

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How can you go wrong with Godiva’s HEART DUETS available in Strawberry, Black Raspberry, Apple and Banana. $8 • godiva stores. To add to the preamble, light up Lelo’s SOY MASSAGE CANDLE. The all-natural wax melts into a pool of luxurious massage oils for spoiling your partner. $28 • kittystoybox.com

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Make that table look great with this set of WINE RING COCKTAIL NAPKINS by Avril Lorenti. They are washable & reusable. $26 (4) • avrilloreti.com For wine lovers, here comes APOTHIC RED, a captivating blend of three distinct grapes, with the dark fruit flavors of Syrah, brambly spice of Zinfandel, and a smooth elegance of Merlot. 13.1% alcohol $13.99 • thebarrelroom.com

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BY: MATERIAL GIRL

............ These are just the best cookies I have ever tried. DONSUEMOR madeleines are just to die for. I still can’t decide which flavor I like best, from the Original Madeline to the Dipped, to the Lemon Zest or the Chocolate Madelines. A box of these cookies will make a great gift for friends, family and that woman you love! You can only get them online, so make sure you order early enough to receive them on time. And the prices are very affordable. Available are single boxes, party trays, variety packs or the yummy cute cakes. $14 - $30 (madelines) • donsuemore.com

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What’s a Valentine’s Day without flowers? Surprise that special someone at work or at home and send her a bouquet from ProFlowers. Check out your many options under Valentine’s Specials! $24.99 - $99.99 • shemag.com

If your girl is all about technology and cannot go anywhere without her laptop, what better than this new hip, stylish and uniquely fashionable laptop bag. It fits a 13" - 15" laptop. The SILO SLIM—AMI LAPTOP CARRIER by iSkin features a quilted reinforced interior with a removable compartment for washing. The bag has one exterior pocket that extends to fit your charger and other basic accessories. $99.99 - $140 • iskin.com/silo/slim

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Sexy underwear for her and her is a must for any Valentine’s Day, and if it is personalized even better. Black or red 100% PURE CHARMEUSE SILK BOXERS for her butch and MY GIRL RED SHORTIES FOR her femme. The shorties come with a camisole but who needs it anyway, let’s go topless for this date! You can personalized both items. $15.15 - $27.15 • personalizationmall.com

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Also for the tech femme, how adorable is the SPEAKAL: IBOO iPod docking station. The iBoo features 2.1 Stereo Speaker System and it’s compatible with all iPods with dock connector. It comes with a remote to control the iBoo and iPod functions, 3 speakers and 9W Subwoofer $79.99 • speakal.com

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From the world renowned Beach Party to a new LGBT Art Deco Walking Tour, the 2011 Winter Party Festival promises an array of events and activities as diverse as LGBT community itself–including an exciting lineup of exclusive events for women. One of the world’s largest and most anticipated events of the year, Winter Party Festival is expected to draw 10,000 revelers from around the world. Beyond the parties, Winter Party Festival features art and culture, shopping, cocktail receptions and tours, all dedicated to fundraising for local and national LGBT equality efforts. Produced by the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force, Winter Party Festival raises funds to build power, take action and create change for the LGBT community. Two-thirds of the net proceeds generated from Winter Party Festival go to work locally through grants administered by the Miami Foundation (formerly the Dade Community Foundation), while the remaining one-third goes to support The Task Force’s efforts nationally. Since its inception in 1994, Winter Party Festival, along with The Task Force’s annual Recognition Dinner, has helped raise more than $2.2 million for LGBT organizations in South Florida. In addition to the four exciting events exclusively for women, Winter Party Festival events include the can’t-miss Beach Party on the sand featuring DJ Alyson Calagna, the “Under One Sun Pool Party” with DJ Twisted Dee, and the debut of “Winter Party Matinee” with DJ Theresa.

Spinning at Industry, the women’s signature event, will be none other than the fab DJ Lisa Pittman. Tickets to Winter Party Festival 2011 are available individually or as part of discounted, multi-event passes, including a Women’s Pass for all four women’s events. Purchasing a Women’s Pass also entitles the guest to a special discounted rate for the Beach Party. One of the hottest new additions to Miami Beach, the Lords South Beach Hotel, has joined Winter Party Festival as the first-ever official women’s host hotel. Visit lordssouthbeach.com to book online and use the promotional code “Wnter Party” to receive the special discounted rate. For more information, to purchase tickets and passes, or to check out the complete schedule of events, visit WINTERPARTY.COM.

Doubletree Surfcomber Hotel, 1717 Collins Avenue, Miami Beach. In addition to picking up tickets and passes, the Welcome Center offers displays, information and swag from WPF’11 partners and LGBT-friendly businesses. HOURS: Wednesday, March 2 • 6P - 10P Thursday, March 3 & 4 • Noon – 10P Saturday, March 5 • 11A – 7P Sunday, March 6 tickets and passes can be picked up at the Beach Party entrance from Noon – 2P

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WOMEN’S ART EXHIBIT & COCKTAIL PARTY Thursday, March 3 • 7P – 10P Location TBA $25 advance/$30 day of event The women of Winter Party and their friends are invited to a special evening of art, music, cocktails and hors d’oeuvres. PA’ELLA: THE OFFICIAL WOMEN’S WINTER PARTY LATIN DANCE EVENT Friday, March 4 • 10P – 4A Location TBA• $15 advance/$20 day of event A sexy fusion of Latin and tropical rhythms will create an unforgettable evening for dancing the night away. Una mezcla sensual de ritmos latinos y tropicales para crear una noche inolvidable. Produced by Icandee Events.

[ WELCOME CENTER ]

“SINCE ITS INCEPTION IN 1994, WINTER PARTY FESTIVAL...HAS HELPED RAISE MORE THAN $2.2 MILLION FOR LGBT ORGANIZATIONS IN SOUTH FLORIDA.”

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[ OFFICIAL WOMEN’S EVENTS ]

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INDUSTRY:THE OFFICIAL WOMEN’S WINTER PARTY SIGNATURE EVENT Saturday, March 5 • 10P – 4A Club O-1 (Club Nikki) One Ocean Drive, Miami Beach • $15 advance/$20 day of event This year’s mega dance party comes complete with house, hip-hop, salsa and DJ Lisa Pittman – one of the most recognizable and accomplished DJs on the scene! Produced by Pandora Events. WOMEN’S JAZZ BRUNCH Sunday, March 6 • 11A – 2P The Betsy Hotel, 1440 Ocean Drive, Miami Beach • $40 advance/$45 day of event Winter Party Festival’s 5th Annual Jazz Brunch features great music, fabulous food, delicious drinks and wonderful women!

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WHAT BETTER WAY TO CELEBRATE SHE MAGAZINE’S 12TH ANNIVERSARY DURING THIS ROMANTIC MONTH OF FEBRUARY THAN TO CELEBRATE THE LONG-TERM RELATIONSHIPS OF OUR READERS? WE CAN’T THINK OF ANYTHING THAT WOULD MAKE US HAPPIER. HERE ARE 12 BEAUTIFUL COUPLES WHO HAVE LOVED EACH OTHER SINCE BEFORE SHE’S BIRTH IN 1999.WE INVITE YOU TO CELEBRATE THEM WITH US. CHEERS! cause I met the love of my life. Tulia is fun to be with, happy, positive and kind. I like her patience and faithfulness, how she goes out of her way to please me, and how she

1) VICKY & NATALIE 15 YEARS • HOLLYWOOD, FL My name is Vicky and the love of my life is Natalie. I’m a Southern gal, all biscuits, gravy and fried chicken. She’s all Indian, dal, curry and hot peppers. We both like old country music. Our anniversary is in November. We met when the holidays were just around the corner. I was hooked like an old catfish on a sunny day. I am 10 years older, but she doesn’t care, so neither do I. I don’t care what anyone says- I have always been married to her in my heart.

tells me everyday that I look beautiful. If you ask Tulia, she would tell you that even through I’m a pain, she likes my spirit, my love of life and my faithfulness.

4) JONETTE & TOWANA 12 YEARS • LAKELAND, FL Jonette: My partner and I met in the fall of 1998 at Bible College and neither of us could have ever dreamed of the blessing that God had in store for us. Towana is an amazingly strong woman. I love that SHE -

she is growing confident in who she is and has persevered through many of life’s trials. We have been through many wonderful journeys. As we celebrate our 12 years, I am constantly reminded of how wonderfully blessed I am. Towana: I like that Jonette has the gift of managing our finances with a plan for our future. I like that she feels I am the most beautiful girl in the world even after 12 years. I am the one God blessed when He brought her into my life. 5) VICKY & BETTY 15 YEARS • MID CITY, NEW ORLEANS We met in April 1995 and began dating in August. Betty and I met through a family member when I was 23 and she was 22. Betty is a Patient Financial Coordinator at a local hospital and I am a Match Sup-

3) JOYCE & SANDY 15 YEARS • WEST UNITY, OHIO We met at work in Archbold, Ohio in June 1995. Our official anniversary is Oct. 20. We met at work in a

2) TULIA & ROSIE 26 YEARS • PLANTATION, FL Tulia and I met on March 17th, 1984. We both were out dancing with friends at a bar called Real People in Queens, New York. I’m glad my friends convinced me to go out be-

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rural town in NW Ohio, known for their Mennonite community. We had a commitment ceremony at an Episcopal Church, then went to Hawaii to celebrate! Sandy currently works there and I volunteer for the Fulton County Humane Society and Girl Scouts. We have a wonderful seven-year old daughter who we adopted when she was three days old. The longevity of our relationship is from surrounding ourselves with great friends and family, staying active together and making time for each other.

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port Specialist for Big Brothers and Big Sisters of Southeast Louisiana. I continue to love Betty more to this day-going on 16 years. Neither one of us has ever been unfaithful nor have we ever split up. During Katrina, we literally lost everything except for three days worth of clothes and our two cats. It’s important to really listen to your partner. Don’t yell, scream or curse. Respect your partner enough to not share certain things with friends. Say every day “I love you”.

6) BELKIS & BELKYS (THE BEES) 12 YEARS • MIAMI, FL We met in 1998 on New Year’s Eve. We have a very BEE-utiful relationship that many people admire. When we got introduced, it was quite interesting having the same name. It was love at first sight. We had so many things in common and got along so well. We have never broken up once in our 12 years together. We are just your perfect type of couple that everyone loves. Our love is solid and will continue to be solid.

7) CARLENE & MELISSA 14 YEARS • MIAMI, FL Carlene, 29, and Melissa, 31, are high school sweethearts! We registered as domestic partners at Miami Beach City Hall in 2007. Carlene is a local artist and Melissa is a

Peace Studies doctoral student. What Melissa likes most about Carlene is her sense of humor. What Carlene likes most about Melissa is her amorous nature.

8) TRISH & JANE 36 YEARS • FT. LAUDERDALE, FL We met in 1974 in the Chicago Women’s Graphics Collective, silkscreening feminist and lesbian posters. Jane is a musician and has played in women’s and lesbian bands. Trish became a chiropractor, and in 1984 they moved to NJ and set up a practice. After 14 years, they retired, bought an RV, and spent the next 10 years traveling around North America. In 2009, they took a long-anticipated trip to Africa for their 35th anniversary, then settled on the beach in South Florida where they live and keep involved with the women’s and artists’ communities.

9) ZEIDA & KATHIE 22 YEARS • MIAMI, FL We have been together since 1988 and met at the Miami International Film Festival through some friends. We have lived through many high points in both of our lives, personal and professional; and also survived many lows together. Zeida, recently retired, was a writer/director for film commercials with her own company and also worked as Commu-

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nications Director for Channel 23. Zeida recently published her first book, Fernando Bujones, An Autobiography. Zeida’s previous partner was Fernando’s mother. I have recently retired also from a 37 year career with Miami-Dade College where I held many roles including Campus President and College Provost. On August 8, 2008 we were one of the lucky couples who were married in the beautiful Yosemite Park in California before the Prop 8 defeat. We love and support each other in every way possible and will continue to do so until our deaths.

10) SALLY & LAURA 15 YEARS • MIAMI, FL We met at a mutual friends party on Memorial day in 1994. Laura thinks I was scoping her out but really it was the other way around. We have been together for almost 16 years. We have had 5 pets who loved and lost. There have been 5 businesses and for the past 10 years we have owned/operated Presidential Realty Group. What I love about her the most is her ability to make me laugh, even when things are tough. For 15.5 years have been in a long and joyful conversation about love, relationships and friendships. We are still deeply engaged in that conversation which I hope will continue for the years ahead. 11) KATIA & FREDDA 25 YEARS • WILTON MANORS, FL My love, Katia, and I are celebrating our 25th anniversary this year. We met at the Duchess in the West Village of Manhattan. Our

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friendsfrom way back in 1986 said it wouldn’t last 6 months due to our extreme differences—an age difference of 15 years, as well as temperament and our cultural diversity. Katia is Brazilian I am Jewish American. Our bond might have been born from overcoming, understanding and respecting our differences. Although there were really tough times I would do it all again in a heartbeat. She fulfills me and completes me in a way only she can do. 12) JUNE & DENISE 17 YEARS • FT. LAUDERDALE, FL June and I have been together for 17 wonderful years. We are truly each other’s best friends, and that’s what has made our relationship so special! We were friends for 2 years before we realized that it was time to step up the friendship to some-

thing more... Best decision we ever made! We met in Washington, D.C. and lived there for about 7 years together, then moved to Florida in 2001. We have 5 (soon to be 6!) amazing grandchildren, 6 ‘spirited’ canines, and are so fortunate to have such a loving a supportive family base (parents and kids!). One of our favorite song lyrics pretty much summed it up for us: “I must have done something right... to get to have you...”

NOTICIAS UNION CIVIL ES UN TEMA ELECTORAL EN PERU El reconocimiento por parte del Estado de la unión civil entre homosexuales se perfilaba a finales de Enero como elemento de campaña electoral en el Perú, después de que una de las agrupa-ciones con más posibilidades de triunfo, la Alianza Perú Posible, anunciara que hará del tema una de sus propuestas de gobierno. “Dos personas que se quieren tienen todo el derecho de vivir juntas y que el Estado les responda por sus derechos”, enfatizó el candidato a primer vicepresidente por la Alianza Perú Posible, Carlos Bruce, abanderado de la idea en el sector que encabeza el ex presidente Alejandro Toledo, indicó DPA. “Las actitudes discriminatorias son las que combatimos. Los gays y lesbianas tienen todo el derecho de ejercer su ciudadanía. Todos deben ser incluidos”, añadió

SE PODRIA INCLUIR PREGUNTA SOBRE LA DIVERSIDAD SEXUAL EN EL CENSO 2012 EN CHILE

Pareja del mismo sexo

Pareja de distinto sexo

El Instituto Nacional de Estadística (INE), realizó en Valdivia (Región de Los Ríos) una prueba del censo 2012, en donde incorporó una posible pregunta piloto sobre la diversidad sexual, señalando si la convivencia es de “pareja del mismo sexo” o de “distinto sexo”. El Movimiento de Integración y Liberación Homosexual (Movilh), fue uno de los principales gestores de esta iniciativa. Por ello, el presidente de este organismo Rolando Jiménez, se muestra conforme ante la pregunta piloto y espera que esta aplicación se mantenga en el censo definitivo del 2012. “En 1992, nosotros planteamos la necesidad de incorporar alguna pregunta que nos permita recoger información relevante para elaborar políticas públicas especificas. Pero ahora y gracias a la comisión realizadora del censo 2012, se nos planteó esta pregunta sobre la orientación sexual de las personas, lo que nos parece un avance”, señaló Jiménez. Ante la posible aceptación e implementación de esta pregunta en el censo 2012, el organismo, pretende incentivar a las personas para que al momento de ser encuestadas, no se intimiden y digan la verdad con respecto a su situación sexual.

Bruce, a quien la propuesta le ha costado que en las redes sociales se dude de su heterosexualidad. En las filas de los otros dos candidatos que según las encuestas pueden disputarle el triunfo a Toledo en los comicios de abril, el ex alcalde de Lima Luis Castañeda y la parlamentaria Keiko Fujimori, no ha habido posturas oficiales frente al tema, pero según versiones periodísticas la tendencia es a oponerse. Incluso, según el diario La República, tanto en la Alianza Solidaridad Nacional, de Castañeda, como en el partido Fuerza 2011, de Fujimori, se ha hablado de manifestaciones “espon-táneas” contra la idea, en las que supuestamente tendría un papel central el Opus Dei, organización conservadora

TIENDA COLOCA ESCUDO SOBRE REVISTA QUE MUESTRA PAREJA GAY: ELTON JOHN, ESPOSO E HIJO Una tienda de Arkansas colocó un cartel homófobo sobre la portada de una revista en la que aparecían Elton John y su marido. Una clienta del lugar se percató del hecho y colgó la foto en Twitter para denunciar la censura. Jennifer Huddleston es una de las más de 12.000 personas que habitan en Mountain Home. Este martes decidió ir a comprar a Harps, una tienda de ultramarinos situada en esta localidad donde, al pasar por la sección de prensa se encontró algo que no se esperaba. La joven confiesa que se quedó “consternada y horrorizada” la portada de US Weekly estaba tapada por un cartel que decía lo siguiente: “Escudo familiar para proteger a los jóvenes compradores de Harps”. ¿De qué protegían los responsables de la tienda? La respuesta está en la pareja que protagonizaba la portada de la revista, en la que aparecían el cantante Elton John y su marido, David Furnish, con su bebé Zachary en brazos. Sin embargo, los “jóvenes” lectores de Mountain Home no podían verlo de un simple vistazo, ya que el “escudo familiar” les protegía.

BRASIL ARCHIVA PROYECTO DE LEY CONTRA HOMOFOBIA Como era previsto desde el inicio de este año, el Proyecto de Ley 122/2006, de autoría de la ex diputada federal Iara Bernardi (PT-SP), fue archivado a finales de Enero por la Subsecretaria de Coordinación Legislativa del Senado. Según indicaron, es parte de un trámite común que se realiza con todos los Proyectos de Ley que no son votados. Para que el Proyecto no sea archivado definitivamente es necesario que un senador junte 60 firmas. Toni Reis, presidente de la Asociación ABGLT dijo que existen dos posibilidades para desarchivarlo: 1- Reunir las firmas necesarias o la segunda es presentar un nuevo Proyecto. 2- El activista afirmó que prefiere un nuevo Proyecto de Ley que, no solo criminalice sino que, también incluya refugio y educación, pero que al momento no hay ningún texto presentado y que todo nuevo Proyecto será discutido entre el movimiento y los parlamentarios aliados. Para Reis, lo más importante es que la lucha contra la homofobia no retroceda. BAJA LA APLICACION PARA TU CELULAR

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católica que en el Perú tiene como principal referente al cardenal Juan Luis Cipriani, quien ya salió a criticar la propuesta de Bruce.

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SEARCH: SHEMAGAZINE

CON VERONICA ESPINAL

SOY MUJER

¿Cuantas veces has escuchado sobre el robo de identidad? ¿Cuantas veces has pensado que nunca te sucedería a ti? ¿En algún momento has tomado medidas para prevenirlo? Si tú, al igual que yo, contestaste “no” a estas preguntas, te diré que ni tú ni yo estamos exentas a que nos suceda. Gracias al avance de la tecnología y a las muchas aplicaciones que los bancos han adoptado para el beneficio de sus usuarios, es que regularmente chequeo mi cuenta corriente en mi banco. Esto es algo que altamente recomiendo tengas el hábito de hacer. Gracias a esta aplicación y a mis infinitos deseos de tomarme una soda bien helada, fue que estando en Miami Beach, a principios de Enero, que decidí pasar por el drive-thru de McDonald’s. Al pretender usar mi tarjeta de débito para pagar me dijeron que la transacción había sido rechazada. ¿Qué? Pagué con otra tarjeta y me fui. De inmediato llamé al banco para llevarme la sorpresa que mi saldo en la cuenta era de $0.78 y que hace 10 minutos se habían hecho dos retiros de dinero en una ciudad que estaba a unos 40 minutos de donde yo había pasado gran parte del día. Primero habían retirado $100 y en la segunda transacción el resto del balance. Obviamente me quede fría y me sentí incómodamente invadida. ¿Pero, cómo sucedió esto si yo no he perdido mi tarjeta de débito? Aparentemente el banco esta tan acostumbrado a que unos H.P. sin oficio les roben el dinero que fue una transacción de los mas común para el empleado del banco. Aunque todavía no lo podía creer y me había quedado sin palabras, sabía que el banco me reembolsaría ese dinero pues tenía forma de comprobar que de alguna forma me habían rodabo los datos de la tarjeta. ¿Cuánto sabían o saben de mí estos amigos de lo ajeno? La verdad, no lo sé. Esa misma noche hice un reporte a la policía pensando en que podrían buscar el video de vigilancia y así ir tras estas personas. Fue casi una perdida de tiempo ya que como la cantidad fue menor de $500 era muy probable que la policía no hiciera nada. ¡Que maravilla y que buenas oportunidades tienen los ladrones en esta ciudad! He aqui unas recomendaciones a seguir para que te protejas o sepas qué hacer si es que te roban mas de $500 algún día. Por lo pronto, espero que mi banco siga mi sugerencia de no dar el balance en el recibo cuando sacas dinero en las maquinas ATM, así nadie mas que tú sabrás cuánto te queda en tu cuenta. ¡Suerte! SHE -

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1- TRATA de usa la tarjeta de débito como crédito, especialmente en las gasolineras. 2- REVISA tu balance, ya sea por teléfono o Internet y asegúrate que reconozcas las transacciones. 3- SI no te llegan tus estados de cuentas o cobros de las tarjetas de crédito a tiempo, llama a verificar que tu información esta correcta. 4- REVISA tu reporte de crédito. La ley requiere que cada agencia de reporte al consumidor te provea una copia gratuita cada 12 meses. Si alguien ha abierto una cuenta o tarjeta de crédito a tu nombre, acá lo encontrarás. Si hay algo raro, repórtalo de inmediato y solicita que sea removido de tu record. Para solicitar tu reporte visita a uno de estos lugares: annualcreditreport.com o llama al 877-322-8228; Equifax: 800685-1111 equifax.xom; Experian: 888-397-3742 experian.com o TransUnion: 800-916-8800 transunion.com. 5- NO tengas contigo tu tarjeta de seguro social o lo escribas en algún papel. Nunca des el número a supuestas llamadas de acreditadotes que lo soliciten. Si la llamada es real, ellos deben tener esa información. 6- PON atención a los papeles que botas en la basura y el tipo de información que contienen. Para solicitar que no te envien ofertas de crédito que contiene tu información, llama al 1-888-5-OPT-OUT (1-888567-8688). Te pedirán tu número de social para verificar. 7- DEPOSITA tus pagos de cuenta o demás correspondencia directamente en el correo. Si vas a salir de viaje y no puedes recoger tu correspondencia, llama al correo para que no la mande a tu casa hasta próximo aviso. Llama al 800-275-8777 o usps.com. 8- SI utilizas tu tarjeta de débito con frecuencia en Internet, visita onguardonline.gov para saber como proteger tu información personal, prevenir fraude y proteger tu computadora. 9- ANOTA en algún lugar seguro tus contraseñas o simplemente apréndetelas de memoria y cámbialas con regularidad, así también como el código pin de tus tarjetas. 10- SI ya te han robado tu información, llama a las tarjetas acreditadotas y solicita que congelen tu crédito. También debes poner alertas de fraude en tus reportes de crédito (ver números en #4). Poner esta alerta te tomará solo 5 minutos ya que se hace de forma automatizada. Cada alerta queda por 90 días.

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GOthisHAIR-FREE summer SILK’N SENSEPIL IS THE MOST POPULAR DEVICE ON THE MARKET FOR THE REMOVAL OF UNWANTED HAIR IN THE PRIVACY OF YOUR HOME. BY MARIA ESPINAL

Are you tired of shaving, getting waxed every few weeks or bleaching your hair? Before I go on telling you about SensEpil, I have tried all of the options listed. Even thought they all worked, the hair obviously kept coming back. I also tried going to two specialists for laser hair removal which can be quite expensive. If you’ve been thinking about Laser Hair Removal, SILKN SENSEPIL has been, for me, the best option. Doing it in the privacy of my bathroom or bedroom, I was able to see the difference on my arms and legs right after my first treatment. No kidding! I saw less hair growing back and the growth process was delayed. Before using this machine, you must first shave the desired area and then click away. I suggest doing it on a day off right after showering. It works on the face, underarms, arms, chin, bikini area, back and legs. It can also be used in the genital area but be careful! Does it hurt? For me, it felt like a rubber band lightly snapping on my skin. It’s definitely a sensation you can tolerate. Besides, the machine has five different levels which you can manage based on your sensitivity. The unit comes with a DVD that takes you through all the directions and features. It also comes with a booklet of necessary information. However, Silkn SensEpil doesn’t work on light hair or dark skin. This is because the unit sends a out a pulse of light that seeks the melanin present in the hair. The darker the hair, the more melanin present. Also, if your skin is too dark, the light does not know the difference between your skin and the hair. To prevent any damage, the machine has a sensor that will detect if the area is too dark. If this happens, simply turn it off and back to try it again. Treating your face, chin, arms, bikini area and legs at the same time can take up to 45 minutes and can be a little boring. I usually do it all in session to avoid boredom and to let the lamp cool off. Each lamp will allow up to 750 pulses, which is 3 treatments on average. The unit comes with one extra light and they can be purchased separately.

RECEIVE 15% OFF

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Take advantage of Silkn’s special discount offer for She Magazine readers. Silkn wants to offer all She Magazine readers 15% off their online purchase when visiting www.silkn.com. You must include this code HSY3599HS at check out time. This offer is valid for online purchase only, expires March 1, 2011.

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SHE CLASSIFIEDS ACCOMMODATIONS

PHOTOGRAPHERS

KEY WEST’S DISTINCTIVE RESORT FOR WOMEN Guesthouse ambience, resort amenities. Ideally located off Duval Street. Award-winning, renovated historic inn features 38 rooms and suites, two pools, two hot tubs, Pearl’s Patio bar, concierge service, Internet access, restaurant and friendly, welcoming staff. Member, World’s Foremost Gay and Lesbian Hotels. 800749-6696, www.pearlsrainbow.com.

THE HIGHLANDS INN — LESBIAN PARADISE! Planet Out says “1 of the 10 best g/l guesthouses in North America!” Year-round women’s resort in Bethlehem, NH. 19 romantic rooms, 100 acres! Member of World’s Foremost Gay & Lesbian Hotels. 1-877-LES-B-INN • highlandsinn-nh.com. EVENTS

HELP WANTED SHE SEARCHES

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Sales representatives (FT or PT) in Dade, Broward, Palm Beach counties needed. Unlimited earning potential and some of the highest commissions in the industry! Sales experience, professionalism and a love for She a MUST! Orlando/Tampa Reps. welcome, too! Send resumes to info@shemag.com.

She Girls: Send us a color photo with contact information. Female House DJs: Send us a color photo with contact information and where you spin. Indie Chicks: Send your press kit, CD and photos! Email us at: info@shemag.com.

FOSTER FAMILIES WANTED Homes needed for Newborns to 17 years. Financial Reimbursement. 24 Hour Support—Free Training. Weekly In-Home Contact—Respite. Foster Parent Bonuses—Developmental Disabilities and Special Health Care Needs Programs. Call 818/365-3665, x238. LIC#191500303 SHE -

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Advertising in She: A Lot More Affordable Than You Think. Call Today 954-354-9751 36 -

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SERVICES

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SHE SCOPES

WITH THE VILLAGE SAGE

AQUARIUS JAN 20 - FEB 19

LEO JULY 23 - AUG 23

Don’t be surprised at your need for solitude. Even in the midst of the ongoing craziness of your life, you have the ability to center yourself. You’re already plotting and planning your next big thing, while doing what you need to do. The more you envision your fantasy, the more you will want to dwell there. Instead make it you goal to turn ‘it’ into reality. Be the ‘Pied Piper’ and influence eager followers to help you.

Use your feline wiles to charm all the significant others in your life into submission or cooperation, rather than use brute force to get your way. All of your relationships will benefit if you think about the outcome of your stubborn refusal to compromise. You have the choice to be part of a happy whole. It’s an opportunity to achieve more unity in your life. There will be many challenges to your need for independence. Be nice.

PISCES FEB 20 - MAR 20

VIRGO AUG 24 - SEPT 23

You have a unique opportunity to manifest your dreams. You also have the opportunity to face your innermost fears and vanquish them in the light of day. You’ll be able to release whatever is holding you back from doing what you want to do. By month’s end you’ll have the personal power, heart-centered purpose and confidence to achieve your goals. Focus on your goals, identify those who could help you and then ask for it.

You’re finally in position to make important, positive changes in every aspect of your life. Allow yourself to make decisions based more about how you feel rather than what you think. Facts and promises are all well and good but focus on your gut. Your health and work habits are in need of some adjustments. Some of you will have to work less, exercise more moderately and find new and different ways to enjoy your life.

ARIES MAR 21 - APR 19

LIBRA SEPT 24 - OCT 23

You get to network yourself in social settings and you get to actively increase your sphere of influence by meeting people who can further your ambitions. Cultivating more patience should be one of your goals as the lack of it is your worst enemy. Enjoy the journey but don’t move too fast along dangerous terrain. Now is a good time to get rid of everything that has outlived its usefulness including negative habits and attitudes.

You’re on your game, having a great time networking yourself and attracting even more admirers. Feel free to give yourself permission to do whatever with whomever you want. Equally, give yourself permission to have much needed alone time to recharge those batteries and to be creative in other ways. Use your incredible charisma to win others to your cause once you figure out what that is. Use your common sense to create a plan that can actually work.

TAURUS APR 20 - MAY 20

SCORPIO OCT 24 - NOV 22

You have energy and ambition, but do you have a plan? Now is not the time to fly by the seat of your pants nor is it the time to bully your way through the crowd. Use your charm to convince others to help you achieve your goals. Compromise and cooperation will win the day. A stubborn unwillingness to consider other ideas won’t serve you. Be flexible and make sure you don’t make mountains out of molehills.

Your focus and energy is on strengthening the foundations of your security. You’ve had a lot of energy just waiting for the signal to burst forth. However, you’ll have to be careful not to let impulsive actions or words cause unsettling consequences. You have an overwhelming need to do something and to do it now. It’s a great time to create new projects and to act on them, as long as you have a real, fact based plan.

GEMINI MAY 21 - JUN 21

SAGITTARIUS NOV 23 - DEC 21

You have a slightly different focus now, as your imagination competes with your intellect. Both crave information and adventure. You can appease both sides by expanding your awareness, as well as your understanding. You’re better off listening to constructive criticism, rather than becoming defensive, brainstorm plugging the leaks before you set sail. Be sure you clarify any and all discussions, make sure what you heard is what was said and more importantly, meant.

Your personal charisma, imagination and sense of humor have created a magnetic force field that draws opportunities to you. However, you’ve got to get out and about for it to work. You’ll have many insightful moments as things that you once thought you wanted, you no longer need. You’re smart and sassy and, at long last, truly believe in your own magical powers. Just don’t promise more than you can do, or chew.

CANCER JUNE 22 - JULY 22

CAPRICORN DEC 22 - JAN 19

Use this time to completely restructure and reorganize your finances, but make sure that everyone’s on the same page. Identify your assets, be realistic and create a plan, using equal parts of fact, imagination and faith. You’ll probably have to come out of your comfort zone in order to change your current situation. Don’t become too emotional. Keep your focus on your goals. Don’t confuse self-worth with net-worth. Keep your business between you and your significant other.

It should come as no surprise that your focus is laserbeamed onto ways to improve your career prospects and over-all finances. You’ve got bold, innovative ideas about how to create more success, as well as the self-confidence and energy to implement them. Allow more time, rather than less, to reach your goals, be flexible about how you get there and don’t get crazy with the budget. Start saving some of it.

The Village Sage is a freelance writer and astologer, who is available for consultations and charts. You can reach her by e-mail at info@shemag.com.

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