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Tina Sordellini Managing Executive Editor
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The Holidays are right around the corner and you know what that means: freeloading relatives! Woo-hoo! You either have one or you are one and well, that sucks. But hey, it’s the Holidays so no one seems to care as long as the freeloaders are gone by New Year’s Day. That’s the funny thing about the Holidays —people seem to be willing to tolerate relatives that they normally wouldn’t want anywhere near their house. Maybe it’s your brother Mike, who hasn’t held a job for more than two days in the last 20 years and always asks if you can loan him a few (or fifty) bucks. Or there’s Uncle Bob who could drink a boatload of Russian sailors under the table three times before noon. Or cousin Lucy who makes the schizophrenic lady who lives under the freeway near your house seem sane. Or that niece Laurie that you only hear from on a holiday that means she’s expecting you to give her a gift. Or your mother-in-law who finds a way to make sure you know that, no matter how much you do, she thinks nothing you do is good enough. Whoever it is, they are at your doorstep and you are greeting them with a smile. It’s all so warm and fuzzy that you forgot last year, when you swore you were never letting them in your house again. Of course, you will remember, but by then it will be too late. They will be laid out on your sofa, changing the channel every time you put on something you want to watch, asking when they can expect to be fed and then rolling their eyes when you ask them to help set the table. And there you are, wearing your best holiday sweater, cooking a feast fit for kings, while Mike is eyeing your jewelry and asking where the nearest pawn shop is, Bob has just cracked open his second bottle of Southern Comfort and has begun to rant about taxes, Laurie is pacing around whining about opening gifts before dinner, Lucy is insisting that your cell phone is broken because no matter what number she dials she can’t reach Marilyn Monroe and Mom is whispering under her breath that your gravy is way too lumpy and your napkins don’t match the table cloth. Are you feeling the Holiday spirit yet? Don’t worry. You will. There will be this moment when you look across the room and catch the glance of your girl. Holiday music will be playing faintly in the background and she will give you that little smile that says she understands exactly how you are feeling and so appreciates you doing all this to make the holiday special. Or your best friend will drop by and help you in the kitchen while you laugh hysterically together over her calling Lucy on your cell phone and pretending to be Marilyn. Or you will just have that random moment with a stranger who does something really nice, like let you go ahead of them in the check out line and finishes off with a warm smile and the words, “Happy Holidays.” It’ll happen. And in that moment it will all be worth it enough for you to let them back in your house again next year. I wish you all the love, patience, kindness and peace you deserve in this magical time of the year. Just please don’t give Lucy my phone number. See you next month!
MANAGING EXECUTIVE EDITOR
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12/1/2011, 1:42 AM
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20 FEATURES
DEPARTMENTS
15 BEATING STRESS
08 DIRECTOR’S CHAIR
10 tips to beat holiday stress
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10 MULTIMEDIA
16 BIG BIG LOVE
Movies, Music, DVDs & TV
A sex guide for people of size and those who love them!
14 IN THE NEWS
27
15 CALENDAR
18 CHEW ON THIS
22 SHE GIRL
D’Angelo Pizza
Meet Christina
20 ON THE COVER Jenny McNulty
34 ON THE SHELVES
27 HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE
34 ARCHIVES Amendment Protest May ‘04
~
38 SCOPES
SHE ESPANOL 32 NOTICIAS 33 YO SOY MUJER
FOLLOW SHE
PICTORIALS 04 SHE SCENE 12 ORLANDO PRIDE 19 EQUALITY FLORIDA 26 AQUA AFFAIR
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Amy Winehouse’s Lioness: Hidden Treasures releases on December 6. Following her tragic passing, some of the producers and musicians who worked closely with Amy spent time listening over the many recordings that Amy had made, before, during and after the release of Frank and Back To Black. It was said by all who worked with Amy that she never played a song the same way twice. It quickly became apparent that they had a collection of songs that deserved to be heard, a collection of songs that were a fitting treatment to Amy the artist and, as importantly, Amy the friend.
If you haven’t had a chance to check out TV Land’s hit series Hot in Cleveland yet then here’s a great reason to tune in. At 10pm on December 7, Laura San Giacomo and Sandra Bernhard will make guest appearances on the show. Victoria (Wendie Malick) is invited to speak on an A-list gay cruise and brings Melanie (Valerie Bertinelli), Joy (Jane Leeves) and Elka (Betty White) with her. On the cruise, Melanie runs into her estranged sister while Joy and Victoria, posing as a lesbian couple, face temptation upon meeting the ship’s sexy captain.
Hitting theaters on December 9 is New Years’ Eve starring a huge ensemble cast including Robert De Niro, Ashton Kutcher, Hilary Swank, Michelle Pfeiffer, Abigail Breslin, Lea Michele, Sofia Vergara, Jessica Biel, Sarah Jessica Parker, Katherine Heigl, Zac Efron, Sienna Miller, Josh Duhamel, Ice Cube, Jon Bon Jovi and more. New Year’s Eve celebrates love, hope, forgiveness, second chances and fresh starts, in intertwining stories told amidst the pulse and promise of New York City on the most dazzling night of the year.
The new holiday TV movie Annie Claus is Coming to Town, starring Maria Thayer, Vicki Lawrence and Vivica Fox, introduces Santa’s offspring, who’s antsy to spend a little time outside the North Pole for once in her life. She has spent every moment of her life up north being Santa’s little girl. But the girl has grown up and is now in charge of toy manufacturing at Santa’s village. With Santa considering retirement, Annie is granted a year’s sabbatical to see the world that has nothing to do with snow, toys and elves. Airs December 10.
Shakira fans will be wowed with the Deluxe CD/DVD edition of En Vivo Desde Paris 2011 live release from the Latin superstar. This special live concert was shot at the Palais de Bercy, in Paris, France. On the DVD, fans will get to experience Shakira like never before with an all-access pass to behind-the-scenes documentary footage. The 19 bilingual hit tracks include “La Tortura,” “Underneath Your Clothes,” “Pienso En Ti,” “Why Wait,” “She Wolf,” “Gypsy,” “Las De La Intuición,” “Whenever-Wherever,” “Hips Don’t Lie” and “Waka Waka (This Time For Africa).” Releases December 6.
Get ready for the big screen premiere of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo! Forty years ago, Harriet Vanger disappeared from a family gathering on the island owned by the powerful Vanger clan. Her body was never found, yet her uncle is convinced it was murder and that the killer is a member of his own family. He employs journalist Mikael Blomkvist (Michael Nyqvist) and the tattooed and troubled but resourceful hacker Lisbeth Salander (Noomi Rapace) to investigate. When the pair link her disappearance to a number of murders, they begin to unravel a dark and appalling family history. Opens December 21.
[
NOT TO BE MISSED: Carnage, starring Jodie Foster and Kate Winslet, tells the story of two sets of parents who decide to have a cordial meeting after their sons are involved in a schoolyard brawl. In theaters December 16.
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IN THE NEWS LGBT CANCER NETWORK EXPANDS RESOURCES DIRECTORY BEYOND NYC The National LGBT Cancer Network, the first program in the country to address the needs of all LGBT people with cancer and those at risk, is pleased to announce that it has expanded its directory of LGBT-friendly cancer screening facilities beyond New York City. A previous New York State Grant had limited the Center to the five boroughs of NYC. The expansion was made possible by a generous grant from The Palette Fund. The directory now includes facilities in California, Colorado, Connecticut, the District of Columbia, Florida, Georgia, Illinois, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, Minnesota, Oregon, Pennsylvania, and Vermont. The National LGBT Cancer Network has selected these resources because of their commitment to offering safe, affordable, welcoming care to all LGBT people. Each facility has a Personal Contact who will guide you in setting up your appointments and assure your comfort and safety when you arrive. “These facilities stand out from other medical facilities that conduct cancer screenings, at which LGBT patients often face a combination of ignorance and discrimination in accessing health care. While homophobia and transphobia among healthcare providers is declining, it is still very much in existence. One out of 5 transgender patients has been turned away by a health care provider. Even well-meaning providers have little training or experience with the LGBT population and our health risks,” said Liz Margolies, Executive Director of the National LGBT Cancer Network. “Because LGBT people are far less likely to have health insurance, with transgender people having the lowest rates of all, the directory includes a number of facilities that do not require health insurance. Transgender people with insurance in their true gender also face the difficulty of getting screened for cancers in body parts that do not match the sex on their insurance card.” To look up information, visit WWW.CANCER-NETWORK.ORG/ SCREENINGS/FACILITIES.
AS MANY AS 40,000 SAME-SEX COUPLES COULD BENEFIT IF U.S. IMMIGRATION LAW TREATED SAME-SEX AND DIFFERENT-SEX COUPLES ALIKE A new Williams Institute study finds there are an estimated 28,500 binational same-sex couples in which one partner is a U.S. citizen and one is not, and nearly 11,500 same-sex couples in which neither partner is a U.S. citizen. “None of these 40,000 couples are eligible to use the immigration preferences available to different-sex spouses,” says Williams Distinguished Scholar and the study’s co-author Gary Gates. Under U.S. immigration policy, a citizen may obtain permanent residence for their non-citizen, different-sex spouse, and expedited citizenship for a resident, different-sex spouse. Permanent residents may also petition for permanent resident status for their different-sex spouses. However, these options are not extended to same-sex couples, even if they are married or are in civil unions or registered domestic partnerships. The study uses data from the Census Bureau’s American Community Survey (ACS) to provide a demographic profile of the 79,200 same-sex couples in the U.S. in which at least one partner is either not a U.S citizen or is a naturalized citizen. The report breaks this population into 3 groups and finds there are an estimated 28,574 binational same-sex couples, 11,442 dual non-citizen same-sex couples and 39,176 dual citizen same-sex couples with at least one naturalized partner. Among noncitizens in binational couples, 45% are Latino/a, 36% are White, and 14% are Asian/Pacific Islander. Among citizens in binational couples, 54% are White, 33% are Latino/a, and 7% are Asian/Pacific Islander. African-Americans comprise 3% of both groups. In addition, 35% of male binational couples and 39% of female binational couples are raising more than 17,000 children. Substantially more than half of dual non-citizen couples (58%) are raising an estimated 7,700 children. While citizens in binational same-sex couples have higher median income levels than their non-citizen partners, non-citizens have lower rates of unemployment at just 2% compared to nearly 8% for citizens.
WHAT HE SAID ON...
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BY ENACTING THIS ORDINANCE, BROWARD COUNTY ADOPTS ONE OF the nation’s most significant policies furthering workplace equality. Today, Broward County continues its long history of leadership in the area of human rights by delivering on the promise of equal pay for equal work.” —Stratton Pollitzer, deputy director for Equality Florida, after Florida’s first countywide Equal Benefits Ordinance approval on November 8, a measure that requires the county’s vendors to provide domestic partners with benefits equal to those offered to spouses of married employees.
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WHAT
BY AURORA WINTER
TIPS TO BEAT STRESS DURING THE HOLIDAYS
1- DECIDE TO make happiness and peace of mind a priority. Choosing to dedicate a few moments to stress relief is worth it. It pays huge dividends in terms of your happiness & health. 2- LET GO OF rushing. When you catch yourself rushing, take a few deep breaths. Come into the present moment. Stress comes when you are doing one thing, yet thinking of a dozen other things you should be doing. Fully focus on one thing at a time, and you will be happier. 3- LET GO OF grief and stressful emotions. If you’re tired of being tired, the best thing you can do is discover the real culprit. In many cases, people often overlook the cumulative impact of unresolved grief. People are confronted by their losses over the holiday season. Many people think that healing from grief just takes time. But the truth is, it’s not time that does the healing. It’s what you do with the time that counts. 4- LET GO OF perfectionism. Perfectionism creates stress. If you find yourself agonizing about finding the “perfect” present or hosting the “perfect” party, give someone a hug. Hugs release the “tend and befriend” hormone called oxytocin, which makes you feel good. Three hugs a day will immunize you from stress and remind you of the true spirit of the holidays. 5- FOCUS ON just one New Year’s Resolution each month and you will set yourself up for success. Most people make the mistake of making
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too many New Year’s Resolutions. It takes about a month to incorporate a new habit into your life. People set themselves up for failure by trying to change a dozen things at once. 6- SURROUND YOURSELF with positive people. Be one yourself. People who are living their life’s purpose have a youthful zest for life that’s contagious. Choose a successful mentor, surround yourself with people who are making a difference, join a Mastermind, and continue growing and learning. 7- FIND YOUR passion. People who are living their passion are inspired. They know they are making a difference. They are authentically happy. 8- EAT HEALTHY food. Drink water. Exercise. Eat wholesome, healthy foods, including fruits and vegetables, drink water, and exercise. 9- GET PLENTY of sleep. Sleep is a huge component in supporting health and happiness. Getting at least 8 hours of sleep a night will also help you lose weight. When you’re stressed, you need an extra hour of sleep. 10- FINALLY, DAILY habits such as meditation, keeping a gratitude journal, or taking a walk in nature will help you enjoy life. Aurora Winter is founder of GriefCoachAcademy.com and the author of “From Heartbreak to Happiness®”. Aurora’s latest book is “Encouraging Words: Insight and Inspiration for Stress-Free Living”. Visit AuroraWinter.com.
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HARD ROCK WINTERFEST BOAT PARADE Dec 10 • 6P • Downtown Fort Lauderdale Free • 954.767.0686 • winterfestparade.com Y100 JINGLE BALL Dec 10 • 7P • BankAtlantic Center Sunrise, FL WANDA SYKES LIVE Dec 11 • 8P Dreyfoos Hall • West Palm Beach, FL kravis.org LGBT HOLIDAY CELEBRATION/TOY DRIVE Dec 15 • 6P - 9P LGBT Visitor Center 1130 Washington Ave, 1st Floor North RSVP requested 305/673-4440 or mdglcc@bellsouth.net • gogaymiami.com SNOW ON 7TH AVENUE Dec 17 • 8P - 10P 7th Ave between 15th & 17th Streets Ybor City in Tampa, FL DRAGS GONE WILD Dec 31 • 6P Palace South Beach 1200 Ocean Drive • Miami Beach, FL palacesouthbeach.com NEW YEAR’S EVE PARADE & BAND BLAST Dec 31 • 5:30p - 9P along 7th Ave. • Ybor City in Tampa, FL NEW YEAR’S EVE hosted by Romi (The Real L Word) Dec 31 Revolution Nightclub • 375 S. Bumby Ave. Orlando, FL • revolutionorlando.com MIDNIGHT MASQUERADE Dec 31 Recko’s Bar • 4910 Edgewater Dr Orlando, FL • 407.730.5991 COUNTDOWN FORT LAUDERDALE Dec 31 • Free Downtown Fort Lauderdale SW 2nd Street, 2nd & 4th Ave COUNTDOWN MIAMI BEACH Dec 31 • Free Ocean Drive & 8th Street COUNTDOWN MIAMI Dec 31 • Free • Bayfront Park
12/11
11/30/2011, 8:06 PM
BY MARIA ESPINAL
Fit or fat? Does size really matter in anyone’s sex life? Does your self-esteem make or break your sexual relationship? If that’s what you think, you might be wrong. Released this past September in a second rewritten, revised and updated edition, Big Big Love is the only one-stop-shop handbook on relationships, sexuality, and big sexy confidence for people of all genders, sizes, and sexual orientations who know that a fantastic love life doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with the number on the bathroom scale. Covering everything from dating to sex toys to getting on top, this guide also features tips on navigating tricky topics like making peace with your belly, coping with weight-related prejudice, and creating a happy, satisfying sex life in a culture where no body is ever perfect enough. We recently spoke to author Hanne Blank, editor or six books on sex bodies and culture, about her new book. Self-identified as simply “queer,” Hanne currently lives in Baltimore, MD with her partner of 15 years. WHAT MOTIVATED YOU TO WRITE BIG BIG LOVE?
I was motivated to write Big Big Love by the fact that while there are a lot of fantastic sex books out there, there weren’t any that really seemed to reflect what my life was like as a happily sexual fat woman, or what the lives of my fat, feisty, sexy, sexually-savvy friends were like. Because we were lacking that representation, we were also lacking a sourcebook for good information and support for fat people, or people who are attracted to fat people, to help them be more happily and healthily sexual. So I decided to make it happen. WHAT KIND OF RESEARCH DID YOU DO FOR THE BOOK? Part of my research is simply that I’ve been doing this work and talking about these issues for more than a decade. Although there has been some formal research published on fatness and sex, mine is the only book out there on the topic. I know what I know because I talk to a lot of people about these issues. Part of my research for the book took the form of a large online survey I conducted for the book, where nearly 800 fat people or people attracted to fat partners answered a wide range of questions SHE -
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about their sexual experiences, thoughts, and feelings. That’s why excerpts from the survey are peppered throughout the book. DO YOU THINK AN OVERWEIGHT WOMAN HAS TO WORK TWICE AS MUCH TO SATISFY HER PARTNER BECAUSE OF PHYSICAL LIMITATIONS? No, I do not. I do not believe that fat women (or men, or transpeople, or anyone else) are necessarily limited in what they can do physically or sexually, because this has simply not been my experience, nor is it the experience of the vast majority of the hundreds of people to whom I’ve talked about their sexual lives. Fat bodies are not necessarily physically limited bodies, and physically limited bodies are not necessarily fat. There’s no reason to think that a bodily difference is necessarily a limiting factor in having a good sex life. THE BOOK IS WRITTEN IN A VERY UPLIFTING/POSITIVE WAY. WHAT KIND OF FEEDBACK HAVE YOU RECEIVED FROM THOSE WHO HAVE READ YOUR BOOK? Thank you! I think it’s important to be positive about sexuality. I have had a lot of people of all
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sizes tell me that Big Big Love made them feel like a good sex life was possible because I made it seem like an okay, everyday thing that a lot of people of all kinds manage to create and enjoy, and not something that was completely out of their league. I love it when readers tell me that Big Big Love made them feel like it was okay for them to go after what they really wanted! HOW IMPORTANT IS SELF-ESTEEM IN ANYONE’S SEX LIFE? (It) is completely critical for a good sex life. I don’t care who you are, I don’t care what you look like, and I seriously don’t care what you weigh, the simple fact is that there’s nothing that’ll undermine your sexual experiences faster than not being able to bring yourself to accept at face value that someone else is into you and that they might, y’know, have good reasons for thinking you’re hot, fun, and awesome. WHAT ABOUT THE COMMUNICATION FACTOR WITH YOUR PARTNER, WITHOUT HURTING HER FEELINGS, WHEN/IF THE WEIGHT BECOMES AN ISSUE? I can’t say this often enough or loud enough: fat isn’t necessarily a problem, it doesn’t necessarily cause problems, and it sure the hell isn’t inevitable that it’s going to “become an issue.” My fifteen-year relationship has its lumpy spots like any long-term relationship, but I can tell you one thing for sure, none of them have anything to do with the size of my butt. If I can be totally candid here, I don’t think avoiding hurting someone’s feelings is the thing someone needs to worry about if they find themselves in this situation. A lot of times, negative feelings about other people’s bodies come from our own feelings of inadequacy or fear about our own bodies. Or they can be ways of pinning other relationship problems on an “external” factor like a partner’s weight. A lot of people will trot out “I’m not attracted to you because you got fat,” for instance, because it’s easier to pin the blame on another person and make it their problem than it is to say something like “I’m frustrated and we don’t communicate well and I don’t know what to do.” DOES ENJOYING YOUR SEX LIFE TO THE MAX
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GO HAND IN HAND WITH BEING FIT RATHER THAN OVERWEIGHT? Enjoying your sex life to the max goes hand in hand with being willing to enjoy your sex life to the max, and doing what works for you to make that happen. This may include doing what you need to do to improve your physical condition, but that’s not a question of “fit or fat,” it’s a question of whether or not you’re physically strong, flexible, and capable at whatever size you are. We should also never forget that the single biggest sex organ any of us has is between our ears, and a lot of what makes sex good is having a good attitude about sex. AFTER READING SOME OF THE QUOTES FROM THE SURVEY AREAS OF THE BOOK, IT SEEMS LIKE OVERWEIGHT PEOPLE FIND IT A LITTLE HARD TO BELIEVE ONE’S PARTNER CAN FEEL ATTRACTED TO A CERTAIN PARTS OF OUR BODIES. HOW CAN WE OVERCOME THAT? The same way that people who feel weird about it when a partner finds their birthmarks attractive, or their surgical scars, or their weird nipple: you practice sitting with it, and letting it in, until you can be open to it. Sometimes it takes a while before you find a way to be comfortable with someone else’s attraction to a part of your body with which you have a fraught relationship. That’s normal and okay. Take a deep breath, remind yourself that it’s really okay if someone wants you for exactly what you are, and try to be gentle and kind to yourself. WHAT DO YOU WANT THE READERS TO TAKE/ LEARN AFTER READING BIG BIG LOVE? I want my readers to know that a wonderful relationship life and a fantastic sex life are not rewards given out to the select few who manage to do everything right, have the right bodies, look the right way, and all that stuff. There is no wrong way to have a body! Cut yourself some slack and concentrate on the really important stuff: what do you want from your love and sex life, what can you do to try to help that manifest, and how can you be kind and compassionate to yourself and to your partner(s) along the way? There’s no size tag on any of that stuff. It’s all out there for you.
FAT BODIES ARE NOT NECESSARILY PHYSICALLY LIMITED BODIES, AND PHYSICALLY LIMITED BODIES ARE NOT NECESSARILY FAT. THERE’S NO REASON TO THINK THAT A BODILY DIFFERENCE IS NECESSARILY A LIMITING FACTOR IN HAVING A GOOD SEX LIFE.” SHE -
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Opened in May 2010, D’Angelo Pizza Wine Bar and Tapas was the next obvious step for Chef Angelo Elia. Chef Angelo wanted to open a new restaurant with a different concept but one that still retained the unique touch experienced by patrons of Casa D’Angelo, which has been recognized as one of America’s finest Italian restaurants with locations in Fort Lauderdale and Boca Raton, FL and in gorgeous Atlantis, Paradise Island. Angelo’s philosophy of putting customers first and giving them the best possible quality in both food and service has become his signature. He is a native of Campania, Italy where he spent one and half years studying cooking before heading to the United States. Angelo has worked at the Four Seasons Hotel La Cisterna in N.Y before moving to Fort Lauderdale and opening Casa D’Angelo and now D’Angelo Pizza Wine Bar and Tapas. D’Angelo is most popular for having impeccable, fresh Italian food with a unique menu, along with a beautiful, relaxing and very modern decor. Come and enjoy a new pizza and tapas experience that has not been seen in Fort Lauderdale where our atmosphere and energy is high and fast paced. The sleek interior offers a great place to bring your family or friends.
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HOURS Sunday- Thursday 11:30am-10:30pm FridaySaturday 11:30am-11:30pm ON THE MENU Tapas, Salads & Soup / Bruschette, Panini & Fritata / Pizze & Calzone / Ceviche & Carpacci / Cheese & Cold cuts WINE LIST A wide range of house wines, by the glass or by the bottle MOST POPULAR DISHES Burrata Cheese / Angelo Pizza / Porcini Mushroom Pizza with White Truffle Oil Sausage with Broccoli Rapini over Escarole THREE MOST POPULAR WINES Whitehaven Sauvignon /Blanc Tormaresca Torcicoda / Primitivo La Spinetta Nebbiolo MOST POPULAR DESSERT Homemade Gelato WHAT IS D’ANGELO MOST POPULAR FOR? Having impeccable, fresh Italian food. Their menu is very unique. Also, the decor is very modern and beautiful. PRICE RANGE $8 - $14 food / $8 & up for wine & cocktails LOCATION 4215 N. Federal Hwy. / Fort Lauderdale, FL 33308 / pizzadangelo.com / 954.561.7300 PICTURED: (Top) Pistacio Gelato. (Bottom) Burrata cheese with arugula & dry figs / Angelo pizza / Porcini mushroom with white truffle oil / Sausage over escaroli & cannelini beans. Also available over broccoli rapini.
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BY DENISE WARNER
Whether you know Jennie McNulty from her being involved in women’s professional football before it was cool or her hilarious “Walking Funny with...” videos on AfterEllen, this standup comic is one to keep an eye on, or at least keep up with! HOW DID WALKING FUNNY WITH... FOR AFTERELLEN.COM START?
Well, I had the idea for my “walking talk show” for a long time. I heard about AE doing a contest for a webseries, so I submitted the idea. It wasn’t what they were looking for in terms of content – they wanted more of a series as opposed to talk show, but they liked my idea and took it anyway. I can’t wait to get them started back up again next year. I’m revamping it a little and have some really amazing guests already lined up to walk! YOU ALSO PLAY WOMEN’S FOOTBALL FOR HOW LONG, NOW? HOW DID YOU DECIDE TO GET INVOLVED WITH IT?
I’m about to start my 11th season. I was at Long Beach Pride and saw a booth for the California Quake Women’s Pro Football. The tryouts were 8am on a Saturday in Long Beach. That’s about 45 minutes from WeHo (1.5 hours with traffic) and it was 8:00 AM. That’s “A.M.” as in “before noon.” I’m a comic. The only time I like to see 8 AM is if I’m just getting in. But I thought I’d have a fun day throwing the ball around and I’d get some material out of it. Well, I ended up getting ten seasons worth of material, and I met and became family with incredible women I would have not otherwise have known. It’s a dream come true every time I suit up, although in my dream I’m younger and faster (laughs). WHEN DID YOU KNOW YOU COULD MAKE A LIVING AT BEING A COMEDIAN?
You can make a living doing comedy? Seriously, I always knew I would—you know, like I dreamed of being an actor/comic as a kid, and I just as-
sumed it would happen. I also started doing comedy at a time when club comedy was really at a peak, so there were a lot of opportunities to perform. My first paid gig—$25, which I still have framed at my house—was just a couple of weeks after I did my first open mic. So, I knew the opportunities were there. I knew I was funny, so I thought, “Let’s do this.” Actually, I just needed to rationalize talking to myself out loud—“I’m not crazy…I’m working on material.” ARE PEOPLE AROUND YOU, LIKE FRIENDS AND FAMILY, NERVOUS YOU’LL PUT THEM IN YOUR ACT?
I could quit comedy and retire if I had a dime for every time my girlfriend pointed a finger at me and said, “That doesn’t make the stage!” But really nervous or worried I’d make them look bad? I don’t think so. Actually, one of my favorite jokes is when my girlfriend is in attendance at a show. With excitement in my voice and on my face I say, “My girlfriend is here with me tonight!” To which, the crowd usually gives an cooing and approving “awwwwwww.” Then I add seriously, “That substantially cuts down on my material.” It usually gets a good laugh. They kind of have to think for a second to get the joke, so it’s also a good crowd barometer for me. WHAT HAVE BEEN SOME HIGHLIGHTS IN YOUR CAREER?
The very first was the first night I ever did comedy. I had taped the set with a little mini recorder, and when I got to my car after that show (which, fortunately, went very well), I listened to it. I heard myself telling the joke, and then I heard the laughter of the crowd just like the comedy albums I heard growing up. It was quite a high. The shows I’ve done on Logo have been really great—seeing yourself on TV is kinda cool. But the most rewarding shows I do are those for the military. I’ve been to Iraq, Afghanistan, Eastern Europe, Asia—all over and have heard at
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every show, “Thanks for taking our minds off of where we are…” It feels like you’re really helping, you know? Helping without actually enlisting! Selfishly, they are really fun gigs to do. We get to ride in Cargo planes and Blackhawk helicopters. I’ve gotten to fire weapons (after a session at the range, it was suggested I keep my night job). Mainly, it’s the connections with the people that are so special. To hear their stories and know what they are doing over there for us and what they’re going through is very powerful. NOWADAYS, COMEDIANS REALLY WORK TOGETHER AND TOUR TOGETHER. WHO ARE SOME OF THE COMICS YOU ENJOY WORKING AND TRAVELING WITH?
I have an improv troop called “Queer on Their Feet” and I’ve traveled with Erin Foley and Diana Yanez with that. That’s really fun. Suzanne Westenhoefer and I just did a “Sweet” resort gig together in Mexico for a week and both of our girlfriends were able to come along too. It was a blast (and I adopted a kitten there too)! Part of what makes Women’s Week in Provincetown so special for the comics is that camaraderie. We are normally out on the road alone, but we get to hang with all our pals that week. In fact, one of the highlights for me that week is the amateur drag king show that Mimi Gonzalez and I host together. HOW DO YOU HANDLE HECKLERS?
I talk for a living. And I have a microphone. And I’m not drunk. So, I win those battles. It depends on the heckler too. Are they a frustrated comic just looking for a chance to be funny? Then you need to slap them down right away. Or are they just really drunk and piping up with liquid courage? Then you need to gently talk them back down to their inside voices. WHAT’S THE BEST PART OF BEING A COMEDIAN?
The hours and the dress code.
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“WE NEED TO GET ALL OF OUR RIGHTS SO THAT WE ARE TRULY EQUAL CITIZENS BETTER EQUIPPED TO PROSPER.” DOES IT EVER GET OLD WHEN PEOPLE EXPECT YOU TO BE FUNNY ALL THE TIME?
OR DO YOU JOT DOWN A BUNCH OF DAILY OBSERVATIONS?
TWITTER OR FACEBOOK HELP WITH ENTERTAINMENT CAREERS NOW?
Ha…that’s funny. People do expect comics to be somewhat like Robin Williams on a talk show…just wacky and crazy, but I’m kind of quiet offstage. I’m not shy and I do think I’m funny offstage but I’m just not wacky. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve met people, and a half an hour into the conversation, they’ll ask me what I do for a living and, when I tell them, they say, rather surprised, “Oh, you don’t seem funny.” (To which, I usually remind them that they are not paying me.) But, that’s just not me. I’m not one of those “always on” people. It’s not like I’m silent. I’m just sort of laid-back, I guess…So, does it get old? Not really. I have to be myself or no one would laugh anyway, so I’m just not “the crazy girl” at the party. Then again, after a couple of shots of tequila…
A little bit of both. I do sit down and try to craft things, yes. But I’ve also got boxes of post- it notes and napkins and junk mail with joke ideas on them.
Yes, unfortunately, I do. I have a real love/hate relationship with Facebook and Twitter. I use them. They have become not only “helpful” but necessary. I just feel that it is leading society to believe that we are all connected in a way we are not. It’s a very superficial connection. How many times have you been in a bar and watched people—in a group—all be “facebooking” their night? But, come on, every now and then put the damn phone down and actually be where you are.…OMG! What a great status update…I’m gonna go FB this right now:”I am where I am.” [Laughs] (Editor’s note: Sadly, she didn’t do it. We checked.)
HOW MUCH OF YOUR ACT IS IMPROVISED AND HOW MUCH IS SCRIPTED?
Ideally, all of it. Sometimes, none of it. I always go into a show with an outline of what I’m gonna talk about in my head. But if the crowd will play with me, I love to just talk to them and play with what they give me. I always do some “scripted” material, and sometimes what [the crowd and I] talk about leads perfectly into something I’ve written. Those moments are a thrill. I think it’s more fun when it’s happening right there, in the moment, onstage. Everyone knows it and it feels special—it’s a unique show. And, that makes it way more fun for me too. DO YOU HAVE TO MAKE A CONSCIOUS EFFORT TO SIT AND WRITE YOUR MATERIAL,
THERE ARE SO MANY LGBT CHARITIES AND ORGANIZATIONS. HOW DO YOU CHOOSE WHAT TO SUPPORT AND BE A PART OF?
We need to get all of our rights so that we are truly equal citizens better equipped to prosper. So, groups working towards that are crucial. The anti-bullying efforts are amazing as well. I guess it all comes down to education. In anything really, education is the key. WITH SO MANY STAND UP COMEDIANS HAVING THE SAME SITCOM GOALS, LIKE WHITNEY AND BEFORE THAT ROSEANNE, DO YOU EVER FEEL LIKE BEING AN OUT LESBIAN INTERFERES WITH A PROJECT LIKE THAT?
Perhaps, but I have to be true to who I am. I can’t deny that “sitcom superstardom” wasn’t an initial goal of mine. We all wanted one after Roseanne but I can’t say I really want that type of show anymore. Don’t get me wrong, I’d love it if they offered me one. Hell, if they offered, I’d jump in that tub and do a Cialis commercial, but it’s just not a goal anymore. But, I also think that with the growing number of media outlets, you can create your own Roseanne however that looks, and get it out there. If something is successful, it will get attention and the attention can then lead to a series or a movie or whatever. DO YOU FEEL THE SOCIAL MEDIA SITES LIKE
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WHO ARE SOME OF YOUR COMEDY IDOLS?
Steve Martin. Lily Tomlin. Carol Burnett. Gilda Radner. WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE A PERSON WHO’S THINKING OF GIVING STANDUP COMEDY A SHOT?
Take my stand up class! Actually, I swore off ever giving advice. I was in one of those aforementioned condos once with a young comic who asked me for “advice.” I prattled on for about 30 minutes about “all I knew about the business” and then proceeded to absolutely eat it the next show. Sometimes I think the longer I’m in this business, the less I know about this business. I guess, ultimately, be truthful. That pretty much goes for everything, doesn’t it? And take my stand up class.
> JENNIEMCNULTY.COM
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OCCUPATION: Hair & Makeup Artist
NITY, WHICH ORGANIZATION WOULD YOU CHOOSE AND WHY?:
DREAM JOB: I’m
National Youth Advocacy Coalition. Our children are our future. THE CARTOON CHARACTER I’M MOST LIKE: Penelope Pussycat THE LAST BOOK I READ WAS: Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance
IF YOU WERE TO BECOME AN ACTIVIST IN THE LGBT COMMU-
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IF YOU COULD HAVE ONE SUPER POWER WHAT WOULD YOU CHOOSE: Teleportation.
I could go anywhere, anytime, instantly And yes, yuck!
THE WEIRDEST THING I ATE WAS: Camel.
IF MY LIFE WERE MADE INTO A MOVIE,MY PART WILL BE PLAYED BY:
Michelle Rodriguez
FIRST KISSED A GIRL AT THE AGE OF: 14 MY MOST MEMORABLE DATE: When she looked at me and smiled,
no words were needed. FAVORITE FLOWER: Orchid THE STRANGEST PLACE I’VE EVER BEEN NAKED:
In a hotel’s
hallway. I JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS.THE FIRST THING I AM GOING TO BUY IS: My
own business. Definitely a lot easier than expected. My friends and family are amazing! Full of love and open arms! WHAT ARE YOUR EXPECTATIONS FOR 2012?: Continuously succeeding in life. The sky isn’t the limit when there’s footprints on the moon. MY COMING OUT WAS:
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11/30/2011, 7:56 PM
photos: hugo crespo
doing it! I love making people feel beautiful. MY MOTHER THINKS I: Am amazing, creative and always strives to go above and beyond. TURN-ONS: Not only being beautiful on the outside but on the inside as well. TURN-OFFS: There is nothing worse than a bad attitude! SECRET FETISH: I love it when my girl takes full control in the bedroom. SENSITIVE BODY PART OR PARTS: Lower back and neck. MY PETS: My Pit, Sookie I LIKE TO WEAR: My chucks MY GREATEST ACCOMPLISHMENT: Life. Being able to conquer anything thrown at me and still come out on top! CELEBRITY’S BUTT I’D MOST LIKE TO SQUEEZE: P!nk I HAVE A WEAKNESS FOR: A gorgeous smile and a great attitude. WHAT BREAKFAST CEREAL BEST DESCRIBES YOU: Fruit Loops. Colorful, well rounded, sweet, and tasty! MY FAVORITE QUOTE: “Everything happens for a reason. Deal with it, learn from it, and move on.” I THINK OUR COMMUNITY NEEDS: Better resources and outlets for our LGBT families.
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Submit your pet photos for consideration to info@shemag.com, re: Pets of the Month.
PETS OF THE MONTH
SO-CO (AKA PRINCESS) / 10 YRS OLD
ROXY / 3 YRS OLD
BREED: Golden Retriever TURN ONS: Cheeseburgers and fries...Yummy. TURN OFFS: My little Pug brother. He annoys me! I AM SPECIAL BECAUSE: (1) I pass written messages between my mommies and help them make up after an argument; (2) I bring my mommies the TV remote control. I THINK MY VET IS: A weirdo! He always picks me up off the floor when I see him. MY MOM DOESN’T KNOW I OCCASIONALLY: Sleep on her pillow when she’s not home. IN MY NEXT LIFE, I WANT TO BE: A dolphin! I love swimming so much!
BREED: St.Bernard (rescue) TURN ONS: I love treats, attention, petting, and running. I especially enjoy large open spaces where I can run laps. TURN OFFS: My sister and brother getting petted when I am not! I AM SPECIAL BECAUSE: I am a protector who keeps my family safe at all times. I THINK MY VET IS: Awesome... when she is not taking my temperature. MY MOMMIES DON’T KNOW I OCCASIONALLY: Long to go everywhere with them, even work. IN MY NEXT LIFE, I WANT TO BE: A marathon runner, I love running laps & I am fast.
For those of you who love the Paul Frank brand, these are two of our favorite items: Signature julius dog bed, available in queen & king ($89.95) & their retractable and very comfortable dog leash ($37.95). Items available online and most pet boutiques.
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ToyShoppe® PetHoliday™ Long Arm Dog Toys. FInd them at Petco. ($9.99)
If you are looking to get a tea cup or toy puppy or if want to go crazy with pet accesories, visit our friends in Lauderdale-by-the Sea, FL, Diamonds & Doggies. Choose from any of the teacup & toy doggy couture ($9.00 & up) or their bling-bling initial collars for your puppy (from $2.95 each). See their ad for contact information. SHE -
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BY MATERIAL GIRL
Brand name handbags are always a hit. My two favorites this year is one of the new COACH MADISON COLLECTION metallic shoulder bag and RALPH LAUREN’s tote in metallic gold. >> $358 & $168 at macys.com
If you are a GaGa fan, her new STILLETO STOCKING is a must-have. Leave it to her to make it out of the norm! >> $65.00 at barneys.com
Hot for game consoles this year is the U DRAW GAME TABLET. Available for Wii, PS3 and XBox 360, turn your TV into your very own art studio! >> $70-$80 at amazon.com
Anything-electronic becomes one of the most-wanted gifts for the year, and the Amazon’s KINDLE FIRE is definitly one of the first on this list. I am in love with it! It may not have cameras like the iPad, but it is very user friendly, even if you have never turned on a computer. I love that there is no instructions booklet, it is all within the device. The wifi connection is very fast, easy to fit in your hand. The only down side is that it can be too heavy if you are holding it for long and gets hot. You might want to get a stand for it. >> $199 at amazon.com While you are at it, one of my favorite cases is the GFORM slevee, available for your iPad, Kindle Fire, Nook or any 7” device. >> $29.95 - $39.95 in both yellow and black at g-form.com.
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Take the bling to your bedroom and shine away! Check out Victoria’s Secrets Pink, Bling It On. Try on the Ultimate PUSH UP BRA & the LACE-BACK HIPSTER GIFT SET. >> $42.50 - $52.50 & $24.50 at Victoria’s Secret Stores.
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JUST DANCE 3 kick-starts the party with over 45 tracks from multiple genres and popular artists including Gwen Stefani, Katy Perry, Nelly Furtado, The Black Eyed Peas, Tai Cruz among a long list. With a variety of all-new gameplay modes, tracks with 4-part choreographies that allow up to 4 players to uniquely shine, and innovative
For all the guys & gals who enjoy extreme sports, capture it in film! Swann has released a FREESTYLE HD wearable video camera. It is waterproof, can be mounted to your helmet, bike, roof of your car & even snaps photos with a 2.5 hour battery life. You can transfer to pc via SD card or USB. >> $279.99 at swann.com
cardio options. Available for Wii, playstation 3 and Xbox. >> $34.99 at amazon.com
Another one of my personal favorites is TOCKY, a tech savvy clock that knows his way around the bedroom! Tocky will leap or jump from your nightstand and roll away to get you out of bed. He’s outûted with a microphone so that you can record your own sounds. Wake-up to your mom’s voice calling you to get up even when you’re 3000 miles away. Tocky can also hold your favorite MP3s. Listen to your favorite tracks as he rolls around your room! Measures 3.25 inches in diameter. Requires 3 AAA batteries. >> $69.99 at perpetualkid.com Re-experience all the beauty and chaos of this fascinating group of women. Get the complete series of THE L WORD, 6 seasons, a 25-disc box loaded with hours of bonus material including a never-beforeseen 2011 cast reunion. >> $89.99 sale price at amazon.com
Let’s accesorize! Our friends at Diamonds & Doggies have a vast line of bling for everyone’s taste. Try on the STAINLESS STEEL CABLE DIAMOND JEWELRY >> $99.00. Choose any of the TECHNOSPORT new designer watches >> $69.00 & take advantage of the 40% OFF Sale on the Roberto Cavalli, Tom Ford and other DESIGNER GLASSES. See their ad in this issue or visit diamondsanddoggies.com.
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For the drag kings...here is the MUSTACHE ORNAMENT. Hang one in your office or on your rear-view mirror… or there’s always hanging it on the Christmas tree. >> $6.49 at perpetualkid.com
Fun books are always great gifts! Delight your favorite chef with THE DEAD CELEBRITY COOKBOOK featuring adored recipes from more than 145 stars. Or make parents of small kids laugh out loud at bedtime with PLEASE GO THE F*CK TO SLEEP. >> Each well under $20 at amazon.com
One of my favorite fragances is Victoria’s Secret’s PINK. It is fresh, young and sexy. Package include fragance & body lotion. >> $25.00 reg $15.00 sale at Victoria’s Secret
Bake fresh, hot pies with your favorite fillings in under 10 minutes with the PERSONAL PIE MAKER! Make a quiche or fruit pie, but wait… now you can bake four pies at a time because one is never enough. Includes recipe guide to make incredible pies at home!
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Yiddish, the language of European Jewry, is based in German with elements of Hebrew as well as Aramaic, Slavic, and Romance languages. THE YIDDISH MAGNETIC POETRY KIT contains a mix of Yiddish and English words and comes with a mini Yiddish dictionary, allowing everybody to join in the fridge door kibitz! >> $11.99 at perpetualkid.com
>> $29.99 at perpetualkid.com
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Poking fun at the famous line in Jerry Maguire, this YOU HAD ME AT SHALOM MUG is already a classic! This Shalom Mug is made of durable stoneware and is dishwasher and microwave safe. >> $12.99 at perpetualkid.com
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NOTICIAS PREVALECEN EN MEXICO DIVERSAS FORMAS DE DISCRIMINACION De acuerdo a los resultados de la Encuesta Nacional sobre Discriminación 2012, en México diversos grupos minoritarios son rechazados por la sociedad, entre éstos personas LGBT y aquellas que viven con VIH. La población mexicana considera que los derechos de diversos grupos vulnerables se respetan poco o nada, principalmente en relación a las personas homosexuales, lesbianas, migrantes e indígenas. El diputado del PAN, en la Asamblea Legislativa del Distrito Federal (ALDF), Federico Manzo Sarquis, reconoció que en el país prevalecen distintas formas de discriminación hacia grupos minoritarios. Las víctimas son personas con capacidades distintas, condición social, de salud o grupos indígenas y personas con preferencias sexuales distintas. Abundó que estos resultados revelan que seis de cada diez personas consideran que lo que más divide a la sociedad es la riqueza; cuatro de cada diez mexicanos no están dispuestos a que en su casa vivan personas homosexuales; mientras que tres de cada diez, rechazan convivir con personas con VIH/SIDA. En esta encuesta, la población mexicana considera que los derechos de diversos grupos vulnerables se respetan poco o nada, principal-
mente en relación a las personas homosexuales, lesbianas, migrantes e indígenas. Por lo tanto, tres de cada diez personas de nivel socioeconómico bajo consideran que sus derechos no son respetados por esa condición o por su color de piel. El Diputado propone adicionar un artículo seis bis en la Ley para Prevenir y Eliminar la Discriminación en el D.F., a efecto de que toda conducta discriminatoria en la que se genere una afectación por parte de quien la sufre, dará lugar a la reclamación del daño moral ocasionado por los particulares o autoridades. El artículo seis bis debe señalar que la conducta discriminatoria previamente determinada por autoridad competente, dará lugar a la reparación del daño moral ocasionado por los particulares o autoridades.
ORGANIZACION LESBICA DE PARAGUAY PREMIADA EN FRANCIA “Es un reconocimiento al trabajo que venimos realizando desde 2003, pero, sobre todo, consideramos que es un avance en la visibilidad de la lucha por ejercicio pleno de los derechos humanos de todas las personas, sin discrimación, en Paraguay”, expresó Judith Grenno, Presidenta de Aireana, grupos por los derechos de las lesbianas, organización que ha sido galardonada por el Premio de Derechos Humanos de la República Francesa “Libertad-IgualdadFraternidad 2011”. El mismo tiene por objetivo compensar a acciones individuales o colectivas relacionadas con la lucha contra las violaciones de los derechos humanos basadas en la orientación sexual, la identidad de género, y la lucha
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Una conferencia europea agradece el buen hacer de España en cuanto a los derechos para los homosexuales. No se trata de favorecer a gays y lesbianas, sino de tener igualdad. La Conferencia sobre la situación de las parejas homosexuales en la Unión Europea ha puesto de relieve el papel de España para los derechos de los homosexuales. El presidente de la asociación l’Autre Cercle, Philippe Orillac, que organiza el evento junto con el Consejo de Europa, afirmó que España es un modelo a seguir porque la ley de 2005 supone una “igualdad entre homosexuales y heterosexuales. La sociedad no tiene nada que perder con la aprobación de uniones de parejas del mismo sexo. No se trata de favorecer a gays y lesbianas, sino de que tenga igualdad”, subrayó. El professor de Antropología Social de la Universidad Complutense de Madrid, Ignacio Pichardo, destacó que los países que permiten el matrimonio homosexual (Noruega, Islandia, Holanda, Suecia, Bélgica, Portugal y España) ofrecen más derechos a este colectivo que los que sólo contemplan la unión civil (Alemania, Reino Unido, Francia, Dinamarca e Irlanda), por ejemplo en herencias. La conferencia puso su foco de atención en la movilidad y la residencia de las parejas homosexuales, donde se pudo comprobar que si un español y un francés se casan, no tienen los mismos derechos si viven en un país u otro.
contra la violencia hacia las mujeres. El premio otorgado por el gobierno francés será entregado por el Primer Ministro de ese país el 10 de diciembre en París en consonancia con la conmemoración del Día Internacional de los Derechos Humanos. El mismo consiste en la suma de 15.000 euros, a fin de que Aireana continúe trabajando en la misma línea que viene desarrollando, fortale-ciendo el área cultural que lleva a cabo en “La Serafina, espacio cultural feminista”, desde el que se promueven conversatorios, talleres, obras de teatro, el Festival de Cine Lesbi-Gay-Trans, así como encuentros lésbicos feministas anualmente.
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¿ES ESPAÑA UN MODELO A SEGUIR POR DERECHOS GAYS?
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CON VERONICA ESPINAL
SOY MUJER
“ES IMPORTANTE QUE NO DEJEMOS QUE LA NEGATIVIDAD MATE NUESTRO ESPÍRITU AVENTURERO”. No en vano dicen que la televisión y las películas logran influenciarnos de cierta forma, ya sea negativa o positivamente. El mes pasado, precisamente el día de Acción de Gracias, vi un video de Disney de ya hace algunos años, “Mickey’s Magical Christmas—Snowed in at the House of Mouse”. Esta película es básicamente una que reúne a todos los personajes de Disney que se juntaron para celebrar Navidad. Como estaba nevando bastante fuerte, los amigos no tuvieron más remedio que celebrar Navidad en la casa de Mickey. Todos estaban felices menos uno, el Pato Donald. Donald sencillamente estaba deprimido, enojado y obviamente incomodo por la felicidad de los demás. Mientras, su amigo Mickey hizo hasta lo imposible para hacer levantarle el ánimo a Donald. Después de varios intentos, Mickey (triste por no lograr poner una sonrisa en el rostro de su mejor amigo) subió a la azotea de la casa y pidió un deseo a una estrella. La mágica estrella bajo del cielo y lleno de alegría a todos los amigos, principalmente al Pato Donald quien se había dado cuenta que era mejor disfrutar y celebrar la Navidad con sus amigos. De cierta forma en este tierno personaje vi reflejado el ánimo de muchas personas, y yo entre ellas. Es muy común que un poco de depresión habite en nosotros en estas fechas y por diferentes razones. En muchas ocasiones he pensado que el ser humano es hijo de la tortura y un tanto masoquista. Muchas veces
damos luz verde a los malos momentos para que nos invadan y echen a perder varias horas de nuestra existencia. Y es que la depresión (y la soledad) es un estado muy fuerte de vencer, según relatos que he escuchado. Pero, ¿hasta qué punto debemos dejar que estos malos momentos, los no tan agradables recuerdos y la lejanía de algunos de nuestros familiares, nos amarguen la noche? ¿Estaríamos poniéndolos de lado si decidimos hacer de limones limonada? A pesar de no poder cambiar el presente, ¿debemos resignarnos a quedarnos encerradas entre cuatros paredes? Entonces, ¿cómo logramos levantar el ánimo? Aunque actualmente no me veo reflejada 100% en estas líneas, anteriormente si he estado en situaciones como esas donde he preferido quedarme en cama viendo televisión, o sea, convirtiéndome en la mayor masoquista del mundo. En algún momento me di cuenta que no tenía por qué vivir esa situación y decidí salir de dentro de las cuatro paredes que era mi casa y disfrutar de una noche—aún sin tener a nadie a mi lado. Es importante que no dejemos que la negatividad mate nuestro espíritu aventurero. Así es que amiga, si en estos días te sientes decaída y abunda en ti la mala onda... date un buen baño con agua helada (o lo más helada posible) para que active tus nervios. Luego, busca tu CD favorito y ponlo a volumen alto en tu equipo de sonido y déjalo sonar mientras te SHE -
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bañas, te vistes y te pones bella para salir en tu auto sin rumbo alguno. Vete al centro comercial. Camina esos pasillos como si estuvieras en tu casa. Cómprate algo que has anhelado desde hace tiempo, ¡mímate un poco... bien que lo mereces! Es impresionante como el objeto más pequeño nos puede dar grandes placeres. Después vete al cine y escoge una película que te levante el espíritu, que te haga sentir grande cuando salgas de esas cuatro amplias paredes. Es importante que aprendamos a recompensarnos a nosotras mismas. Por muy ridículo que parezca, vete a la playa una mañana y tírate en la arena. Observa cada objeto que te rodea, mira lo inmenso que es el cielo que te cubre. Te darás cuenta lo pequeña que eres y lo enorme que es el medio que te rodea, aprovéchalo. Trata de poner tu mente en blanco por difícil que sea. Cuando sientas que has levantado tu ánimo, llama a tu familia y transmítele esa magia que sientes. Recuérdales lo importante que es vivir el instante, no es justo que nos amarguemos. Si esta Navidad un poco de tristeza te invade, ponle un alto a tiempo y ¡a levantar el ánimo! Mira a tu alrededor y verás que tenemos tanto por lo cual agradecer a Dios, por lo que tienes y por lo que vendrá en tu camino. Sube a tu azotea simbólica y pide un deseo a esa estrella mágica. Recuerda que siempre, siempre, hay personas que están en peores condiciones que las tuyas. ¡FELICIDADES!
12/11
12/1/2011, 1:15 AM
VES ON THE SHEL SHELVES
BY MARISSA COHEN
MAY ‘04 RALLY TO PROTEST THE ANTI-GAY AMENDMENT DURING THE S. REPUBLICAN LEADERSHIP CONFERENCE IN MIAMI BEACH, FL.
SHE LOVES YOU, SHE LOVES YOU NOT BY JULIE ANNE PETERS In She Loves You, She Loves You Not, teen Alyssa has to start her life over again after her dad finds out that she’s gay and ships her off to live with her biological mom Carly, who she’s never met. Issues of self-acceptance and identity surround Alyssa, as she tries to build a brand new life for herself, separate from her mother. Julie Anne Peters was a National Book Award Finalist for Luna, and it’s easy to see why. Heartfelt, lyrical, and moving, She Loves You, She Loves You Not is a must for the queer teen in your life. THE BAD ALWAYS DIE TWICE BY CHERYL CRANE The only child of film star and bombshell Lana Turner, Cheryl Crane turns her hand to mysteries (her 1998 memoir Detour: A Hollywood Story became a New York Times bestseller). Crane’s no stranger to darkness or scandal. As a teenager, she stabbed Turner’s abusive, mobster boyfriend in the stomach, killing him, and making young Crane the center of a trial. These experiences helped her create The Bad Always Die Twice, in which amateur sleuth and Hollywood realtor Nikki Harper races against time to find out who murdered a has-been TV actor. Legendary mystery writer James Ellroy called it “superb” and we say it’s fun and clever, by turns gossipy, dark, and gripping. PURPLE GRASS BY DENNY HAMANN Writer, lyricist and veterinarian Dr. Denny Hamann’s novel Purple Grass is really a modern day fable about a little lamb—named Little Lamb — who discovers that he actually likes purple grass, even though the rest of the flock likes green grass and the Bible says that those who like purple grass are doomed. Hamann’s novel is a thinly veiled metaphor for growing up gay in America and it’s original enough that it works and works well. Purple Grass is an imaginative, unusual take on the traditional coming out narrative, sort of Animal Farm meets the children’s classic Char-lotte’s Web, with a gay twist. To learn more about Hamann’s work, visit flyingpegasus.com. facebook
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11/30/2011, 7:59 PM
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SHE CLASSIFIEDS EVENTS
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THE HIGHLANDS INN — LESBIAN PARADISE! Planet Out says “1 of the 10 best g/l guesthouses in North America!” Year-round women’s resort in Bethlehem, NH. 19 romantic rooms, 100 acres! Member of World’s Foremost Gay & Lesbian Hotels. 1-877-LES-B-INN • highlandsinn-nh.com. COMMUNITY GROUPS/ORGANIZATIONS
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SHE SCOPES
WITH THE VILLAGE SAGE
AQUARIUS JAN 20 - FEB 19
LEO JULY 23 - AUG 23
Don’t be surprised if, amidst all the holiday socializing, you find yourself escaping into your own private fantasyland. While you enjoy partying with your friends and take every opportunity to share your ideas, you may have to defend them to naysayers, so make sure that conversations don’t turn into heated confrontations. By mid-month you’ll be able to release any pent-up emotions and use the power generated to push your agenda forward. Just don’t be impatient and reckless.
You’ll have to work a little harder to balance what you want to do, with what you have to do. Avoid impulsive words or emotional outbursts that will most certainly undermine an otherwise fun time. How you react is really the only thing you actually have total control over, so let your sense of humor save the day and enjoy all the holiday socializing without all the family drama. Concentrate on your own needs and make self-improvement your priority.
PISCES FEB 20 - MAR 20
VIRGO AUG 24 - SEPT 23
You have the ability to transform your professional life, but it will require even more patience than usual, at least until mid-month. While business usually runs on cold, hard facts, you tend to run on pure emotions. Be careful that you don’t waste energy on feelings of insecurity and doubt. Give voice to those feelings and then really listen to feedback from the significant others involved. Create a long-term strategy for ensuring your future financial security.
Your focus is usually on business and on creating more financial security. However, the planets are putting your attention on your home and family now and on creating more emotional stability in your life. You have an opportunity to finally put your past issues behind you, but don’t let history repeat itself. Communication is key. Discuss calmly, using reason and logic, rather than brute force and compromise. Release ineffective ways of expressing yourself and giving and receiving love, and you will transform your life.
ARIES MAR 21 - APR 19
LIBRA SEPT 24 - OCT 23
You’ll be working towards your goals with more patience and more maturity, not to mention some good old common sense. State your opinions, but don’t expect everyone to share them. Learn to discuss, rather than dictate, and learn from others who are very different from you. Be optimistic about your future plans, even while being realistic. Go with the flow. Hopefully it will take you out of your ‘norm,’ and open you to the new, different and unusual.
Enjoy exploring everything from your own neighborhood to your goals and share as many good times as you can with loved ones. Accept as many holiday invites as you can and take the opportunity to network, make new friends, and learn new things. Be open to doing the same things in different ways, as the Universe shines a light on what needs to adjust in your life. By mid-month, you’ll be reenergized and re-organized, having faced and vanquished your fears and insecurities.
TAURUS APR 20 - MAY 20
SCORPIO OCT 24 - NOV 22
Take this time to re-evaluate your goals, strategies, and your resources. Reuse, renew, recycle and even refinance. Make a realistic budget and stick to it, even if cash flow improves. Stash it away for a rainy day. Dealing with your finances may trigger a fear response that drags your relationships into the spotlight. Pay attention when you perceive a ‘lack’ of anything from money to sex, so that you can fine-tune your reactions.
While your conscious mind is focused on improving finances, your subconscious is focused on purging negative habits and improving your communication with all of the significant others in your life. Be selective and limit your holiday socializing. Don’t let pleasure interfere with business. Whatever you do, don’t mix business with pleasure. It’s a good time to look back on the year and assess what you have accomplished, and what you want to achieve in the coming year.
GEMINI MAY 21 - JUN 21
SAGITTARIUS NOV 23 - DEC 21
You have the opportunity to make significant changes in how you think about your life, what you keep from your past, and create your future fantasies. You’re being empowered to use your intuition and to share your feelings, your dreams and desires. Remember that sharing means listening as well as talking and respecting the feelings of all the significant others in your sphere of influence. After all, you usually get what you give, so compromise to a win-win.
The good news is that you are in total control of your destiny. The bad news is that you cannot entirely control the circumstances surrounding you, but you can be realistic about the probable outcomes without making major changes. Capitalize on your skills and network to create more opportunities in every area of your life. Give yourself a birthday gift by improving the quality of your life in the present, even while envisioning a fantastic new future.
CANCER JUNE 22 - JULY 22
CAPRICORN DEC 22 - JAN 19
You’ll experience emotional power surges amidst sudden power struggles, both at home, and at work, so be extra careful about acting on impulse. Take some time alone in your ‘shell’ to put things in perspective, then find ways to discuss rather then defend. When the planets are in disarray, so are your feelings, thoughts and moods. No worries though, it’s just a little test from the Universe, and you are more than capable of getting an A+.
You’re full of energy, and you’ll have to be very careful to harness all that power for good rather than evil. Your attention is turned inward, as you seek to understand past mistakes so that you don’t repeat them. While it’s great to be determined, don’t be stubborn about your strategies for reaching them. Acknowledge the reality of the circumstances you find yourself in and then create a new plan to get where you want to be.
The Village Sage is a freelance writer and astologer, who is available for consultations and charts. You can reach her by e-mail at info@shemag.com.
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