She Magazine—Nov '13

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director’s chair

I don’t know about you, but I am a Spice geek from way back. If you were to take a look through my music library, you’d see that in my book, there’s no such thing as too much Spice Girls. I’ve seen the movie—yes, that silly, fun flick, Spice World—about 40 times. And, I can promise you that my neighbors must have thought they were missing the Superbowl when the Girls surprised the world by hopping out of that car at the 2012 London Olympics. I’m not at all embarrassed to tell you this. Why should I be?

The Spice Girls are the worldwide top selling girl group of all time. I’m not gonna lie.

Deep down, I really am Lezzy Spice.

As I am sure you can imagine, I couldn’t be more thrilled to have Mel B, a-k-a Scary Spice on our cover. Not only has she been an active supporter of the LGBT community, but as far as I am concerned, she also holds the title for best Paso Doble in the history of Dancing With The Stars. With her new single hitting the airwaves, Mel B is right back on stage and in the spotlight where she belongs.

Also in the spotlight this month, Maria Espinal brings us all the fun details from her recent trip to Sweden. From gay to mainstream, rustic to posh (no Spice-pun intended), Stockholm has something for everyone. Check out her little adventure and you will see what I mean.

If staying in the U.S. is more your cup of tea, make sure you give a good look at our spotlights on P-Town and this month’s White Party Weekend in Miami.

It’s November, so the air is cooler, the leaves are changing colors (pretty much everywhere but here in South Florida) and the holiday season is just around the corner.

It’s a great time to decide what you want to put in the spotlight to spice up your life.

I’m gonna go grab the baby and a bowl of popcorn and sit down for her first viewing of Spice World. Hi ci ya, hold tight!

See you next month.

MANAGING EXECUTIVE EDITOR Tina Sordellini PUBLICITY SHE ESPAÑOL EXECUTIVE EDITOR Maria Espinal ASSOCIATE EDITORS Marissa Cohen • Shawn Nicholson Denise Warner • Donna Woessner CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Marissa Cohen • Verónica Espinal The Village Sage • Nadine Smith Tina Sordellini • Denise Warner CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS Verónica Espinal • Yadira Claralt Laura Volk • Angie Sowers Juan Saco Mironoff • Boi-Photography SALES ASSOCIATES Maria Espinal • Diana Price Laura Volk • Donna Woessner ads@shemag.com DISTRIBUTION JR Davis • Randy Justice

Tina Sordellini Managing Executive Editor

SUBSCRIPTIONS www.shemag.com EDITORIAL OFFICE 6511 Nova Drive, #173 • Davie, FL 33317 954.354.9751 office info@shemag.com • www.shemag.com

SHE: WOMEN OWNED, WOMEN OPERATED, WOMEN EMPOWERED! The ideas and opinions expressed in She Magazine do not necessarily reflect opinions of Shemag, L.L.C., She Magazine, or of editors or staff. Publication of the name or photograph of any person or organization should not be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of that person or organization. All advertising subject to approval by She Magazine. She Magazine/Shemag, L.L.C. is not responsible for unauthorized use or copyright infringement as present in camera ready, client provided ads, nor is it liable for any loss or suit arising from submitted advertisement, copy, photography, or artwork. Reproduction of She Magazine, in whole or in part, is strictly prohibited without the express written consent of Shemag, L.L.C.

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november 2013 / VOLUME 15 / ISSUE 10

IN THIS ISSUE

22

20 features

she espaÑol

16 PROVINCETOWN

30 NOTICIAS

A women’s haven for all seasons and number one travel destination.

Entérate lo que sucede en nuestros países.

Get to know Lady M

photos

18 INDIE CHICKS 20 MEL B

“For once in their lives, people should do whatever they want to do, but do it for themselves.”

22 WOMEN’S WHITE PARTY

26

31 YO SOY MUJER

04 SHE SCENE 12 SWEET’S PLAYA DEL CARMEN 32 EDEN PACIFIC NORTHWEST

Get the white outfits out as Women’s White Party celebrates its 13th Anniversary!

26 STOCKHOLM, SWEDEN

“If you want to visit a gay friendly and laid-back European country, then Sweden and its capital city of Stockholm should be first on your list. Stockholm is made up of fourteen...”

departments

06 DIRECTOR’S CHAIR 10 MULTIMEDIA 14 IN THE NEWS 15 CALENDAR OF EVENTS 24 SHE GIRL 34 ON THE SHELVES 34 ARCHIVES 38 SCOPES

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16

>> READ OUR FREE DIGITAL EDITION AT WWW.SHEMAG.COM

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MULTIMEDIA

with Marissa Cohen

The reigning queen of dance-pop Cher is back with her 25th studio album, Closer to the Truth. Conceptualized after her successful movie comeback in Burlesque (2010), Closer to the Truth began its musical journey as country-pop but soon transformed back to the kind of dance music that a true Cher fan will love. Several tracks were written by Pink especially for Cher including “Lie to Me” and “I Walk Alone.”

Put your paws up! Out on Nov. 11 is Lady Gaga’s latest, Artpop, featuring the hit single “Applause” as well as “Artpop” and “Dope.” Gaga herself calls third album Artpop, which took two years to produce, a “celebration and a poetic and musical journey.” Artpop will be released in both traditional and digital forms, with fashion tips, videos, insider info and more included in the digital version.

‘Tis the witching hour every Sunday night on Lifetime Channel as Julia Ormond (Mad Men), Madchen Amick (Damages), Jenna Dewan Tatum (American Horror Story), and Rachel Boston (In Plain Sight) star as the Beauchamps, a family of witches living in a small seaside town in Witches of East End, based on the bestselling novel of the name by Melissa de la Cruz.

Catch up on missed episodes at mylifetime. com. Airs Sundays, 10 pm on Lifetime.

Smart and sexy Natalie Portman returns as astrophysicist Jane Foster who is brought from earth to the planet Asgard and reunited with Thor (Chris Hemsworth).

The war between good and evil that began in Thor (2011) continues in Thor: The Dark World, as Jane and Thor fight to save the world from Loki, Thor’s evil brother. In theaters Nov. 8. With Chris Hemsworth, Rene Russo, Anthony Hopkins.

DJ Randy Bettis mixed the 75-minute, 15track Outright Divas, from Centaur Music to showcase the best from some of our hottest divas. No collection of sass and style would be complete without Chaka Kahn, Aretha Franklin, Gloria Gaynor, Tina Turner, Pink, Beyoncé, Rihanna, Kelly Clarkson, Katy Perry, and, of course, Lady Gaga and the reigning queen of divas, Cher.

Jennifer Lawrence ignites the screen as Katniss Everdeen with the second installment in The Hunger Games trilogy.

In Catching Fire, young Katniss and her companion Peeta Mellark are forced to participate in a special edition of the Hunger Games after their 74th Annual Hunger Games victory sparks rebellion and hope in the Panem Districts. In theaters Nov. 22.

With Liam Hensworth, Amanda Plummer.

NOT TO BE MISSED: The ever-Charmed One Alyssa Milano (Mistresses) will host the third season of Project Runway: All Stars, Thursdays at 9 pm on Lifetime, appearing alongside returning judges such as Isaac Mizrahi and Georgina Chapman.

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it was a full week of fun, adventure and do-goodery when the women took over the fabulous playacar palace in playa del carmen, mexico with sweet. photos by denise jeong & happy sweeties / view more photos at www.shemag.com

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in the news New Report: Estimated 1 Million African-American Adults in the U.S. Identify as LGBT An estimated 1,018,700 (3.7 percent) of African-American adults consider themselves lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender (LGBT) and 34 percent of African-American same-sex couples are raising children, according to a new report released mid-October

by UCLA Williams Institute Scholars Angeliki Kastanis, Public Policy Research Fellow, and Gary J. Gates, Distinguished Scholar. The study, “LGBT African-American Individuals and AfricanAmerican Same-Sex Couples,” includes socioeconomic and demographic characteristics of African-American LGBT individuals and African-American same-sex couples in the U.S. Currently, the estimated 84,000 African-American individuals in same-sex couples tend to live in areas where there are higher proportions of African-Americans. For example, a quarter of African-American same-sex couples live in Georgia, New York, North Carolina, and Maryland.

The report finds overall higher unemployment rates (15 percent v. 12 percent) and lower proportions with a college degree (23 percent v. 26 percent) among LGBT African-Americans, when compared to their non-LGBT counterparts. However, these disadvantages are not present among African-Americans in same-sex couples. Twenty-five percent of African-Americans in same-sex couples have completed a college degree, compared to 22 percent of African-Americans in different-sex couples. In addition, 71 percent of African-Americans in same-sex couples are employed compared to 68 percent of their counterparts in different-sex couples.

LGBT African-Americans are also less likely than their non-LGBT counterparts to have health insurance. Another significant finding in the report is that LGBT African-American females and African-American females in same-sex couples are three times more likely to report military service than their non-LGBT counterparts.

The report considers the characteristics of adults who identify as LGBT using the Gallup Daily tracking survey. Data from the 2008-2010 American Community Survey are used to consider characteristics of both married and unmarried same-sex couples. U.S. Census 2010 data are used to report the number of same-sex couples in the U.S. All surveys include respondents who identify as African-American (non-Hispanic) when asked to describe their race.

what she said about...

“Governor Christie, by his actions, seems to have come to the conclusion that so many others have already: that it is simply the right thing to do to ensure that all loving and committed lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender couples have the option of marriage. We celebrate with the couples that have already married in the first hours of this decision taking effect and we look forward to the thousands more. We congratulate Garden State Equality and LAMDA Legal on their efforts to deliver the freedom to marry in New Jersey and we are proud to continue to partner with them in this struggle.”

— Rea Carey, Executive Director, National Gay and Lesbian Task Force on Gov. Christie dropping appeal of same-sex marriage ruling.

november

in lgbt history Nov. 11, 1950— The Mattachine Society, the first sustained American homosexual group, is founded in Los Angeles.

Nov. 12, 2008—Connecticut becomes the second state to allow same-sex marriages

by Court Decision.

Nov. 6, 1990—Deborah Glick is elected as the first open lesbian member of the New York State Legislature.

Nov. 8, 1977—Harvey Milk becomes the first openly gay man to be elected in a major U.S. city when he is elected to the San Francisco Board of Supervisors. Milk was assasinated on November 27, 1978

by Dan White.

Nov. 10, 1976—Lynn Ransom of Oakland, CA wins custody of her children. She is the first open lesbian mother to do so.

Nov. 17, 1985—The Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) is formed, in response to the New York Post’s grossly defamatory and sensationalized HIV/AIDS coverage.

Nov. 21, 2001—Maryland’s Anti-discrimination Act became law. It prohibits discrimination based on sexual orientation in regard to public accommodations, housing and employment.

Nov. 26, 1982—Cris Williamson and Meg Christian play Carnegie Hall, the first openly lesbian act to do so. Live at The Carnegie Hall was recorded for Olivia Records’ tenth anniversary, released in 1983.

Nov. 30, 1993—President Bill Clinton signed “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” (DADT) into law, mandating the discharge of openly gay, lesbian, or bisexual service members.

Nov. 1987—Compañeras: Latina Lesbians is published. Compiled and edited by Juanita Ramos, it is a collection of oral histories, essays, poems, short stories of 47 women born in ten Latin American countries.

Dec. 1, 1952—The New York Daily News carried a front-page story (under the headline “Ex-GI Becomes Blonde Beauty”) announcing that Christine Jorgensen had become the recipient of the first “sex change”, it caused a sensation.

Sources: Historic Calendar Project, Wikipedia, Library of Congress, Gay and Lesbian Issues.

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GREATER FORT LAUDERDALE

ON TOP WITH LGBT VISITORS & RESIDENTS Wilton Manors Gayborhood of the Year, Highest Number of Same-Sex Households

It’s not the size of the city that matters, with Greater Fort Lauderdale’s Wilton Manors beating worldwide competition to be named “Gayborhood of the Year” in the 2013 ManAboutWorld Editors’ Choice Awards. At the same time, the destination was recently cited to be the city with the highest concentration of same-sex couple households by the U.S. Census, edging out traditional frontrunner San Francisco and recent newcomer Seattle.

In the beating heart of Greater Fort Lauderdale, the vibrant community of Wilton Manors, known as “Island City” due to the winding waterways that flow through the city, was praised by ManAboutWorld as a “triumph over assimilation.” Wilton Manors continues to evolve and features the largest Pride Center and a soon to open World Aids Museum and Educational Center, the only museum dedicated to the HIV/AIDS epidemic.

Greater Fort Lauderdale has long been a

destination of choice for LGBT travelers with hundreds of gay-owned and operated businesses, and one of the country’s most diverse gay capitals. It’s not surprising that recently released data from the U.S. Census revealed that in Greater Fort Lauderdale same-sex couples make up a 2.8 percent of total households, the most in the country with Seattle ranking second with 2.5 percent and San Francisco rounding out the top three with 2.1 percent.

“With approximately 1.2 million LGBT travelers spending $1.4 billion a year, we continue to roll out the rainbow carpet and spread the word throughout the world with a concerted marketing campaign that we are out and proudly welcoming lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender travelers, events, meetings, businesses and conferences,” said Richard Gray, managing director for the LGBT market at the Greater Fort Lauderdale Convention & Visitors Bureau. www.sunny.org/lgbt

the united states postal service to issue stamp honoring lgbt political icon The Harvey Milk Foundation announced via their Facebook page that the United States Postal Service will issue a stamp in honor of LGBT political icon Harvey Milk, joining others like John F. Kennedy, Rosa Parks and Jackie Robinson.

The announcement makes Milk, who made history as the first openly gay man to win political office in California when he was elected to San Francisco’s Board of Supervisors in 1977, the first openly LGBT official ever featured on U.S. postage.

“Harvey Milk’s legacy is alive...His historic run paved the way for a new generation of LGBT leaders who can be open and honest about who they are, and it’s encouraging to see the U.S. Postal Service honoring his legacy of pride today,” said Chuck Wolfe, President/CEO of the Gay & Lesbian Victory Fund and Institute.

The stamp is expected to be introduced in 2014.

TO DO WHERE TO GO WHAT

International Food & Wine Festival Thru Nov 11 • at Epcot® in Orlando weekly • wednesdays for women at michele’s dining lounge 2161-67 Oakland Park Blvd. • 6PM - 9PM 1130 Washington Ave. 1st Floor North Ft Lauderdale • Dine, Drink & Network!

Complimentary Martinis & Spa Treatments michelesdl.com • 954.533.1919 Miami Greek Festival 2013 Nov. 8 - 10 • 11AM – 11PM 7901 N. Kendall Dr. • Miami, FL 33143 themiamigreekfestival.com Sparkle—The 17th Annual Miami Recognition Dinner Fontainebleau Miami Beach Nov. 9 • 6:30PM miamirecognitiondinner.org Exposé Live Nov. 9 • 9PM • Magic City Casino 450 NW 37th Ave • Miami theultimatemiami.com Tampa Bay Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence Drag Queen Bingo Nov. 11 • 7:30PM - 10:30PM Hamburger Mary’s • Ybor City Smart Ride Nov 15 - 16 • Miami to Key West thesmartride.org Rock AIDS Nov. 23 • 3PM - 7PM • Curtis Hixon Park E Zack St., Tampa • metrotambabay.org 3rd Annual NVEEE Red Carpet Event Nov. 22 • Location TBA • nveee.org Brazilian Fest of Pompano Beach Nov. 23 • 10AM-10PM Pompano Beach Community Park 1700 NE 8th St., Pompano Beach brazilianfestpompano.com • 954-962-0920 Women’s White Party Nov. 27 – 30 various locations womenswhiteparty.com Grand Opening Party Moulin Blanc Nov. 29 • 10PM Miami/Miami Beach • Location TBA www.vice3vents.com

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feature

P-TOWN a Women’s Haven for All Seasons

rants, check out a sunset dune tour and beach bonfire party, walk your dog along the beach and Commercial Street, or swing into an epic dance party that concludes the annual celebration.

This is a dress up town, where Halloween attracts thousands to the fog-laced streets of the village. Thanksgiving and New Year’s celebrations make for special memories, in a setting where one regularly sees wild turkeys or geese in flight against gorgeous horizons. Whether you’re looking for an intimate February getaway with that special someone for Valentine’s Day, or just a restful vacation of solitude, historic Provincetown can be a cozy and quiet getaway from life on steroids.

If you must wait until spring to visit Provincetown, check out Single Women’s Weekend, May 16-18, 2014, a same sex event featuring speed meeting, dance parties, nationally acclaimed entertainment, wine tastings and even Spin-the-Bottle, to meet that special woman or new best friend.

Also in May 2014, the annual Cape Cod Women’s Music Festival rocks the town. 100% of the proceeds raised are donated to girlygirl P.A.R.T.S. “gives back” a group providing assistance for non-medical expenses to women with cancer on the Cape. Women of Color and their Friends is also an early summer event and Memorial Day annually brings younger women to celebrate the end of another school year.

Provincetown’s focus on women may be best acknowledged by the number of women-owned businesses, unique art exhibitions and art forums, from poetry reading to drum circles on the beach.

Yes, here is one place to enjoy a unique brand of guesthouses and tailored cuisine in outstanding restaurants, shopping and recreational destinations. This is your town for all seasons, one that keeps its welcome mat out for a weekend or a lifetime. In Provincetown, America’s First Destination, the temperature is always delightful for women looking for that special get away.

Ptown, as the locals call it, is known for many firsts: where the Pilgrims first landed, America’s first and oldest continuous artist colony and the first town to legally recognize same sex marriage. For thousands of women, Ptown is also a number one travel destination. Provincetown’s diverse, progressive reputation as a place to celebrate, network and mingle finds women of all ages annually drawn to the tip of Cape Cod. Mark your calendar for these annual Ptown events!

Through many events and attractions, Ptown finds a creative way to be extraordinary. Each September, for example, thousands of theater fans flock to this quaint destination to celebrate Tennessee Williams with live performances, from as near as Boston and as far as Cape Town. This year’s Festival celebrated the roles of women in the works of Tennessee Williams. Through his plays, Tennessee Williams gave voice to new kinds of women: his self doubting, strongly deceptive, self determined and frankly desirous female characters are all invariably unforgettable.

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indie chicks When & how did you start in the music business?

I started when I was 12 years old. I would freestyle to myself until my friends heard me one day and discovered my secret! From then on I started battling all the time in the streets. Then I moved on to the studio where I actually started making songs and mix tapes and booking shows, making sure everyone everywhere knows who I am.

The urban genre is mainly a man’s world. Has it been difficult for you as a gay woman to break in to that scene?

It hasn’t been difficult for me at all. To get respect you have to gain it. I

work so hard day and night. Sometimes, I even work harder than most of the men I know. It’s all in how badly you want it.

Musical influences: Eve, Missy Elliot, Drake, Future, Wisin y Yandel, Ivy Queen, Movado, Sean Paul, Notorious Big, 2Pac, Sade, Rihanna. The list goes on.

If you could record a duet with anyone, who would it be?

This is definitely a difficult question. I would love to do a duet with any of the musical influences I listed above.

What would you say makes a good song?

The feeling you put into it no matter what genre it is! Of course, an awesome beat behind all that. Always be true to yourself and your fans.

What do you like most about your music?

I write it myself and help produce it myself. Therefore, it is genuinely my art.

If not music, what do you think you’d be doing as a career?

I would’ve been a veterinarian. I love animals!

What is the album you are most embarrassed to admit you own but secretly enjoy?

Honestly, when I was young I had the Backstreet Boys’ and the Spice Girls’ albums, which were in at the time. Now, I really don’t have anything I am embarrassed about! (laughs) Why did you choose to work under your own independent label rather than mainstream record labels?

I’m independent because I’m free to do as I please. My creativity and my imagination aren’t controlled. You have to be a very hardworking and structured person to be able to work independently and leave a mark, and I will.

If the opportunity presented itself, would you sign with a mainstream record label?

I would sign to a mainstream label under the condition that my vision wouldn’t be changed and they could support and believe in me.

What would you say to anyone who might want to start in the music business as an independent artist?

Don’t give up. It’s a lot of work. Fight for your voice to be heard. Touch people’s lives and be a positive influence on them.

What is in your CD/MP3 player right now?

I have the new Drake album.

What are some of your upcoming projects?

I will be working on collaborations with big signed artists, releasing a couple of new music videos over the holidays and dropping an album really soon. My new album is very different and refreshing. It will make a change in the music industry and set the bar a little bit higher for everyone out there. www.officialladym.com

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by denise warner

from the cover

You can’t ever have enough spice in your life, so we’ve got a little more: Mel B served as a judge for the recently wrapped eighth season of America’s Got Talent just in time for the release of her new single and spicy video, “For Once in My Life.” Mel B spoke to us about her music, her activism, celebrity girl crushes, her family, and the LGBT community.

It’s been almost 10 years since your last single. How much do you think the music industry has changed?

Oh, I think the music industry is ever changing. There’s always some rock, some country, some dance. It all depends on your taste, but there’s always something happening. Being a judge on America’s Got Talent week in and week out since March and seeing all those talented performers up on stage made me think, “I wanna get back up there!”

It is a fun song, I wanted it to be about getting rid of your excess baggage and letting go because, let’s face it, life can be hard and hum drum. I wanted to give people something that says they could just throw away their willynillys, jump up and down, dance and sing. For once in their lives, people should do whatever they want to do, but do it for themselves.

When you’re thinking about taking on a new project or song, what are the most important components you look for?

It is important to make sure that you’re taking part in [the process of] the song, that you’re into the writing of it and have a say so in the project that you’re involved in so that’s it’s reflective of you. Otherwise when you perform it, it’s not going to resonate as well.

And you’re back with your new single, “For Once in My Life.”

You’ve worked with such a range of artists and performers from comedy team French & Saunders to Missy Elliott. Is there anyone now you’re interested in working with?

I wanted it to be a feel good song because that’s exactly how I’m feeling: good! We finished America’s Got Talent and I was back in the studio straight away, writing it with my cowriters and my producers. I got this song finished in a week. It felt so right that I couldn’t wait to get it out there. I love it. I just want to be singing it and promoting it.

I’m actually working with some DJs and rappers right now because I’m at the dance remix part. I’ve got some well-known rappers laying lyrics over the top and doing the breakdowns.

I can’t tell you who until it’s finished but then I’ll do a big announcement. You’re going to love it, and it’s really exciting!

Oooh, everyone loves a surprise! is

It’s a fun song! Was there a message in it?

there a specific lesson you’ve learned

over the years that you still apply to your career today?

Oh yeah! If you don’t enjoy it, don’t do it. You know, it’s been many years since I’ve been back in the studio. I’m happy to get that fire back in my tummy. You have to enjoy [what you’re doing] or just don’t do it. Do something else.

The Closing Ceremony of the 2012 London Olympics (pictured) was a moment in time we’ll never forget. What was that like for you, reuniting with the Spice Girls live, on stage in front of a global audience?

Oh, it was lovely! I think people forget that we’re genuinely friends! You know, we did everything together. We traveled the world, wrote songs, made music and were a part of one another’s lives for so long that we’ve got a really tight bond. We still do today. We all support each other. Mel C. and Geri both have songs out now, Emma has a successful radio show and everyone knows about Victoria and her amazing fashion line. We all give each other pats on the back and we’ve got a real sisterhood. We stand the test of time with girl power and all that, it’s all true. It’s amazing.

So, the Olympics were fun for us.

Any nerves with that global audience watching?

I think, for me, I just didn’t want to mess up the timing! I had to be on with my part or

photos by alexander george cover: damon kidwell spice girls: ap

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I’d mess up the whole song! We rehearsed for three weeks together. We all brought our kids to work. We were focused and ready. It’s my girls! Being back on stage with them was great! I don’t really get nervous with my girls.

We can give each other a look and we’re right in the comfort zone, having a big ol’ laugh, enjoying ourselves and hoping the audience is, too. We had a blast! And afterward, we partied at George Michael’s house til six in the morning and I kept my gold cat suit on! I was like, “I’m not taking my cat suit off!” It was great fun, really!

You’ve been living in L.A. for a while now. Is there anything you miss about London life? Like, popping to the chippy on the High Street?

(Laughs) I’ve been living in L.A. for 12 years now, and I have a 14-year-old daughter, I have four gorgeous daughters. They’ve basically lived here all their lives and they love Los Angeles. We travel a lot, though—we were in Australia for a year when I did Australian X Factor. I do love to travel but my base is L.A. now. When I was in London for the Olympics, my kids were with me. They love London because London has such great culture. But L.A. is more ‘home’ now for us, although I do miss London at Christmas time.

You have such a huge LGBT following.

What does that mean to you?

I think first being part of the Spice Girls helped with that, and we loved it. We would say, “Our gays,” like, “Our gays are so supportive!” It’s really humbling because they’re a vocal group, as in, they’ll tell you what they don’t like! So, we were lucky back then, and even now, for me, for all of us, I consider myself lucky to have their support, and I’m really, really proud of that. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

You’ve partnered with some amazing organizations, like The Susan G. Komen Foundation, the NoH8 Campaign, and Real Water. What attracts you to these things that makes you want to be a part of it?

I’ve been a part of Real Water for five years now. I found this water while I was performing in Vegas. It was so dry and hot there and I couldn’t find a way to stay hydrated until I found this water. It’s alkalined, alkalized and great for hydration and hangovers. So I said, “I want to bring this water to LA, to NY, all over because people need to hear about this. I want my friends to know about this.” Before you know it, I was shipping out cases to Kim Kardashian and to my celebrity friends and

their friends. It took off like crazy! So, then, I thought, “It’s cancer awareness month. Let’s partner up with the Susan G. Komen Foundation and we’ll get pink bottles and donate some proceeds to them, and do some good all the way around.” So, that’s going on now through December 2014.

Since we’re a magazine for women, do you have any current celebrity girl crushes?

I’ll tell you who I think is absolutely gorgeous: Rachel McAdams, from The Notebook. She’s got that fresh look, such an English rose face - you know? So gorgeous, so real. that’s good one! Well done! What kind of balancing act does it take to be a mom, a wife, and a successful performer?

It is just that! A balancing act! I mean, right now, I’m on a tour bus, doing the radio circuit for my single, and for Real Water this week.

I’m not going to see my girls until the weekend and that’s hard! But all summer long they’ve been back and forth with me and we’ve had such good quality Mom time. But they know when it’s time for me to work. Same goes for them. They get to be on a jet with Mom and then when they get home, it’s back to work,

chores, and homework!

Out of all the things you’ve done—singing, dancing, TV, world tours—what’s the most challenging?

I’ve been really lucky. I’ve had great experiences with the Spice Girls, and on my own.

I’ve got to be on TV, host things and sing.

Everything I do, it’s an experience. I did Rent on stage. Sure, it’s a bit nerve wracking, but that’s good! I love that feeling!

Last month was National Coming Out Day. Do you have any advice for the brave LGBT people who came out?

Stay strong because there is nothing better than living true to yourself. I get so angry when people get bullied for coming out. It’s just absolutely unfair and wrong. That’s why I did the NoH8 campaign because I believe in it and support it. It does take courage to come out, and I think you can do it and still be dignified and classy, hold your head up and be true to yourself. Trust your inner confidence. I constantly reinforce that to my four girls now to be confident from within, and start figuring out who you are and what you want in life. www.melaniebrown.com

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cirque blanc

feature

the women's white party turns up the heat!

prises,” said Yesi Leon, co-producer of The Women’s White Party. “AIDS is not typically thought of as a disease that affects gay women but many of us know or love someone affected by HIV or AIDS. We have a wonderful community of women who are committed to raising awareness of the disease and supporting this great cause. New to Care Resource is their expanded service program to provide a full range of medical service to LGBT women, including the uninsured and under insured.”

The week kicks off Wednesday, Nov. 27th with Dolce at the New Mova Lounge on Brickell (401 SW 3rd Ave, Miami, FL • 10PM-3AM • $8) overlooking the Miami River. Dance away with DJ Jenni Foxx with funky beats on the decks and naughty shows on stage.

On Friday, November 29th it’s time for Cielo, co-produced by Icandee Events at Lincoln Road’s famous Yuca Lounge (501 Lincoln Rd, Miami Beach • 10PM-4AM • $10) for a night of Latin infused sounds by DJ Pat Pat and flamenco dancers taking the stage.

Saturday, November 30th is the women’s signature White Party, Cirque Blanc, benefiting Care Resource and held in the heart of South Beach as over a thousand women take over the newest arrival to the area: Trade (upstairs from the new score • 1437 Washington Avenue • 9PM-4AM • $20 advance / $25 door • VIP Tickets $60 advance / $70 door—includes 5 complimentary cocktails, vip room access, vip gift bag), a state of the art, mega dance club with luxury VIP areas, LCD walls and more. Trade will be transformed into a White French Circus with shows, a national recording artist, and a main floor pumping with your favorite House and Dance beats along with a cast of characters and celebrity appearances. White attire is suggested. Don’t forget your wallets either because the annual Silent Auction will be on display all night to give you a chance to bid on travel, art, spa packages, concert tickets and more.

The National Hotel located at 1677 Collins Avenue, directly on the ocean is the host hotel, starting at just $179 a night.

For more information, visit www.womenswhiteparty.com

nov 27-dec 2 . miami beach Thanksgiving week in Miami is synonymous with one thing: The White Party, the country’s largest HIV/AIDS fundraiser.

Pandora Events, now celebrating its thirteenth year presenting the Women’s White Party, is once again bringing together several events that will keep your social calendar full all weekend. If you enjoy sun bathing, sexy women, hot musical beats, celebrites and more, then Women’s White Party is just what you’ve been waiting for. Enjoy the many pleasures of South Beach, from renowned dining and amazing shopping to pristine beaches and gorgeous clear skies – and of course a weekend invasion of women.

Cirque Blanc, the Women’s White party signature event, benefits a great cause. The 29th annual White Party is known as the world’s largest and prestigious HIV/AIDS fundraiser benefiting Care Resource, a non-profit, community-based organization in Florida. Pandora Events has put together another stellar lineup of fabulous events for women who love women. The three-day schedule of activities and parties includes something for women of all tastes.

“We are thrilled to once again bring together our community for a weekend of events filled with music, women, shows and a few sexy surSHE - 22 - 11/13

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SHE GIRL

photos: photos by adinamarie / more at www.shemag.com i live in: Fort Lauderdale, FL. My occupation: Bartender and actress.

Zodiac Sign: Scorpio.

Dream Girl: Strong, independent, dark hair, gorgeous hands,

health-conscious, caring and supportive, spiritual and deep, creative and artistic.

Dream Job: Acting in feature films and interesting projects.

My mother thinks I: I can do whatever I set my mind to.

Turn-ons: Commitment, discipline and responsibility.

Turn-offs: Stupidity My Best Quality: Commitment and passion for life. my pets: Two Chihuahuas and a cat. the last book i read: Irreverent Acting by William Morris.

I have a weakness for: Raffaello candies, flowers in the room, and cozy tea-time with my love.

I like to wear: Jeans, hats, boots and loose tank tops.

If you could have one super power, what would it be and why?: I want the power to bring world peace.

Sensitive Body Part: There are at least a few.

If my life were made into a movie, my part will be played by: Asia Argento my greatest accomplishment: Is the picture of my life today:

my relationship, peace in my family and building my life in America. my favorite tv show: Lie To Me. Celebrity’s butt I would most like to squeeze:

Salvador Dali.

My most memorable date: We walked in the rain for a few

hours, laughing, talking, holding hands.

The cartoon character I am most like: Merida from

Brave.

If I could have one wish granted, I would wish: My

worries away.

The last movie I went to a theater to see was: Gravity.

My coming out was: A slow process. I fully came out a few

years after I moved to Los Angeles from Russia.

French Fries, French Vanilla, French Toast or French Manicure?: French Vanilla. if you could change your name, what would you pick: I already changed my name to Shakti. i first kissed a girl at age: 3. my favorite flower: Peony.

Your house is on fire, besides a loved one, what is the inanimate object you’d grab? My Shiva and Ganesh

statues.

What breakfast cereal best describes you? A whole-

grain cereal with strawberries.

The strangest place I’ve ever been naked: A park I just won a million dollars. The FIRST thing I am going to buy is: Tickets for my family to visit from Russia.

The weirdest thing I ever ate was: Sea urchin.

I think the LGBT community needs: More acceptance. if you were to become an activist in the lgbt community, which organization would you choose: I

would work in an organization to help push the rights of gay and lesbians to adopt children.

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by maria espinal

travel

If you want to visit a gay friendly and laidback European country, then Sweden and its capital city of Stockholm should be first on your list.

Stockholm is made up of fourteen islands connected by 30 bridges. Vacationing there is like going back in time to the city’s medieval origins but with all the benefits of today’s technology.

Made up of walking paths and cobblestoned streets, Stockholm is relaxed and its pace is much slower than in America. It’s a pleasant change to see the locals walking and riding their bikes to work.

When planning your trip, make sure that you pack a good pair of walking shoes so you can experience some of the natural beauty of Stockholm on foot.

[ DAY 1 ] On the first day, as I arrived in Stockholm at the Arlanda Airport, all I could think about was the excitement of meeting other friends in LGBT media (and, of course, visiting the ABBA Museum). On the way to the baggage claim, I walked through the “Hall of Fame” - large portraits of Swedish icons from past and present.

After taking the 20-minute train ride into the heart of the city, our first stop was breakfast at the Clairon Sign Hotel, within walking distance from the Arlanda Express Station. www.arlandaexpress.se The Clarion Sign Hotel is the largest hotel in the city and combines the best of Scandinavian architecture and design. The style of Sweden definitely shows in the unique

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“

Sweden is recognized as one of the most socially liberal countries in Europe and in the world.

Recent polls indicate that a large majority of Swedes support LGBT rights.”

furniture in the hotel’s lobby and in the design of the American Table Brasserie that hosted our delicious breakfast. The American Table Brasserie’s communal and intimate style shows in its two large, long tables where you can sit and socialize with new friends or simply dine alone. www.clarionsign.se After breakfast, we moved on to The Fashion World of Jean Paul Gaultier: From the Sidewalk to the Catwalk at the Arkitektur & Designcentrum. The exhibit details the glamorous career of world famous fashion designer Jean Paul Gaultier and is headed to New York next, so don’t miss a chance to see it with your own eyes. www.arkdes.se After the exhibit, we walked by the water, enjoying the peaceful and lush island in the middle of bustling Stockholm, until we arrived at the eco-friendly and award-winning Hotel Skeppsholmen. Built from 1699 to 1702, the beautiful and charming 17th century building has all the peace and quiet of a historic home, even though it was created with the purpose of housing Karl XII’s Royal Marines. I really enjoyed the hotel’s restaurant, Langa Raden. Both the seafood cuisine and the food presentation were wonderful. www.hotelskeppsholmen.se For our final destination of the day, we walked to the dock and boarded a speedboat and later a sailboat appropriately called “Out.” The ride was fantastic as we enjoyed nature in the middle of the Stockholm Archipelago, the largest archipelago in Sweden and the second largest in the Baltic Sea. After enjoying a light snack of coffee and cinnamon rolls

aboard Out, we arrived at Island Lodge, a small, uninhabited island which was once used as a torpedo depot by the Swedish military. The eco-friendly Island Lodge is as close to nature as one can get. There’s no electricity, Internet or phone access on the island, so be sure to factor that into your vacation plans. Even though guests sleep in tents and use porta potties, the tents are spacious with plump beds and luxurious bed linen. Each tent has a great view of the water and the stunning sunset. If you’re a nature girl, you’ll love the natural, sustainable comforts of Island Lodge. www.islandlodge.se [ DAY 2 ] I rose early in the brisk, 30-degree weather to see the gorgeous sunrise through my tent window. We departed from Island Lodge after breakfast to catch the archipelago ferry back to Stockholm. I had just enough time to take a quick shower and change at the 5-star Sheraton Hotel, located in the very heart of Stockholm’s business district. www. sheratonstockholm.com Our first stop was Fotografiska, one of the world’s largest museums for contemporary photography. Fotografiska is located inside Stora Tullhuset, on the docks of Stadsgården in Stockholm. The museum presents four major exhibitions and approximately 20 smaller annual exhibitions. After exploring the museum, we were all ready for a light, organic lunch in the Fotografiska Bistro, which had a perfect view of Stockholm’s inlet. www.fotografiska.eu It was time to head to the classic and exclusive department store Nordiska Kom-

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paniet (NK), preferred by many celebrities and high-end clientele. Founded in 1902, this six-level department store has over 100 separate departments, each with its own distinct style. While Nordiska Kompaniet doesn’t offer online shopping, you can visit their website to get a feel for this legendary store. www.nk.se Even though it was listed as optional on our itinerary, a visit to the ABBA Museum was a must for me. (ABBA was my own personal soundtrack to the trip!) A small group of us took the city tram to get there. Of course we got a bit lost, but we finally arrived. Even though ABBA was a cultural phenomenon in America, I was surprised to learn that ABBA was never that big in Sweden. This museum sells out fast, so if you go, buy your tickets in advance. In the ABBA Museum, I explored costumes, gold records and memorabilia. What truly caught my attention was the recording studio with ABBA’s musical instruments, headphones, mics and even the main recording board from Polar Studio. ABBA received many gold records for selling over 300 million albums – and all of these are on display in a breathtaking circular room that also contains all of ABBA’s many LPs and costumes. Want to be your own Dancing Queen? Visitors looking for an interactive ABBA experience can sing on stage with the foursome and audition with your favorite song at Polar Studio. This is a stop you must make while visiting Stockholm. www.abbathemuseum.com After the ABBA Museum, we boarded a city tram to our hotel. We had just enough time to shower and change before another amazing experience: The Icebar at the Nordic Sea Hotel. (Of course, we walked there.) Kept at 5°c all year round, all the furnishings, including the glasses, are made from pure, clear ice from the River Torne in Jukkasjärvi, a village in Northern Sweden. Before you enter, the Icebar provides you with a warm blue cape and gloves. My cocktail, served in a glass-shaped ice cube, was the best I’d ever had. The Icebar is often marketed as a wedding location and they’ve hosted several gay weddings. www.nordicseahotel.se We enjoyed dinner at Brasseri Le Rouge, a colorful French, three-story restaurant which reminded me of Paris’s famous 19th century club, the Moulin Rouge. (Nicole Kidman in a corset not included.) This unique restaurant offered great food and service. www.lerouge.se/en.

After dinner, some of us decided to go to

the closing party for the Gay and Lesbian Film Festival, but I decided that it was time for a good night’s rest. After all, I had more walking to do the next day!

[ DAY 3 ]

The next morning after a light breakfast, we went on a walking tour through Old Town, within a few blocks of the Sheraton Hotel. Established in the 13th century, Old Town is lovely with its winding, narrow alleys, picturesque squares and cozy cafés. We went through the impressive Parliament building to get to the main area of Old Town, which is the home of the Nobel Museum. www.old-town-stockholm.com Close to Old Town is another must see: The Royal Palace, where King Carl XVI Gustaf celebrates his 40th jubilee as Sweden’s Head of State this year. The outside of the Royal Palace was overwhelming. Before going in, I simply stood there, taking it all in.

The interior of the Royal Palace was equally as stunning, from the high ceilings and the long staircases to the tapestries and the grand chandeliers. Housed within the Royal Palace are the Bernadotte Library and the Royal Apartments. Also amazing was the knowledgeable guide who knew everything about the history of the Royal Family and the Palace.

Search for the Royal Palace’s iPhone app: “Kungliga Slotten.” www.royalcourt.se After a visit to the Palace, we stopped at the peaceful Millesgården, the former home and sculpture garden of Carl Milles, Sweden’s foremost sculptor. His most breathtaking works are on display here. www.millesgarden.se We were ready for more delicious food, along with a tour of the early 20th century hotel, Ett Hem. Built in 1910, the name Ett Hem -- which means “A Home” – couldn’t be more accurate: this hotel, once home to an artistic couple, still retains all the intimate, relaxing pleasure of its days as a private dwelling. It’s easy to see why this twelve-room hotel remains a favorite spot for celebrities. Here we enjoyed a fresh and healthy lunch in the Glasshouse. Dessert was wonderful and it tasted even better with piping hot coffee as we sat outside in the beautiful garden. www. etthem.se All of us gays used our free time to visit the grave of Greta Garbo at the Unesco World Heritage Skogskyrkogården, The Woodland Cemetery. This resting place is peaceful, with its tall trees. www.skogskyrkogarden.se

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We had just enough time to freshen up at the hotel before we visited the Vasa Museum to meet with Stockholm’s Gay and Lesbian Network members. This was our last scheduled visit of the tour. Little did I know that my visit to the Vasa Museum, named for the huge 17th century Vasa warship that it houses, would leave me speechless. The Vasa warship is an important piece of Swedish history and the world’s only perfectly preserved warship of its kind. From its maiden voyage in 1628 (where it sank in Stockholm Harbor after a mere five minutes) to its salvage in 1961, the Vasa warship is a must see, and its detail and beauty brought me to tears. Make sure you set aside a few hours to visit this museum, so you can enjoy either lunch or dinner at their restaurant. www.vasamuseet.se After the LGBT networking at the Vasa Museum, off we went for our supper and interesting conversation at Zink Grill. We had a great time! I also enjoyed the ‘70s and ‘80s music in the background. Dinner ended around midnight. Some of us went to party and others— like me—preferred to go back to the hotel and get some much-needed rest. We all had to catch a plane home the next day and needed to shift back to real-world mode. www.zinkgrill.se [ PLAN FOR STOCKHOLM PRIDE ]

Perhaps after my next visit I can tell you about Stockholm Pride, which takes place at the end of July. The whole city pulls out their rainbow flags! The Pride parade becomes a family event that attracts 50,000 participants. Over 500,000 local and visiting

spectators join together in celebration. www. stockholmpride.org [ GETTING THERE ]

When flying to Sweden, you are welcome to research other airlines. I definitely recommend Scandinavian Airlines. They have direct flights to Stockholm from Chicago and New York. I am excited to say that as of November, Scandinavian Airlines will fly direct from Fort Lauderdale. January and February are considered low season months. From midJune to mid-August, hotels will offer summer prices. When booking a hotel, bear in mind that hotel rates increase during the week but not during weekends or holidays. How’s that for fantastic? [ LGBT SWEDEN ]

Sweden is as gay-friendly as it is possible to be. When gay marriage became legal in May of 2009, it wasn’t a big headline. Also in 2009, Sweden passed a gender-neutral law on marriage, making Sweden the seventh country in the world to open marriage to same-sex couples. Same-sex marriages are openly performed in churches, and Sweden is recognized as one of the most socially liberal countries in Europe and in the world. Recent polls indicate that a large majority of Swedes support LGBT rights.

Start planning now for what could be your next unforgettable vacation. For more information and to download your lesbian guide to Stockholm, point your web browswer to www.visitstockholm.com/ gay-lesbian. Enjoy!

[ win a trip to pink christmas in stockholm ] Stockholm has an excellent reputation among international LGBT travelers, and has been ranked in the past few years as one of the world’s gay-friendliest destinations. Pink Christmas Week in Stockholm, in conjuntion with Stockholm Visitors Board and Visit Sweden, want to give you a chance to win a trip to Stockholm this Christmas.

“Pink Christmas is an annual highlight in Stockholm, with a number of Christmas events. We hope to use the campaign ‘A Pink Christmas’ to highlight the fact that Stockholm has tons to offer gay and lesbian travelers during the Christmas season, too,” says Christina Guggenberger, project manager of the Stockholm Gay & Lesbian Network in Stockholm Visitors Board.

The contest will take place over the three-week period from October 29–November 19, 2013 at facebook.com/gaylesbianstockholm Pink Christmas Week will be from December 9–15 in Stockholm, and is organized by Stockholm Gay Life. Over the course of the week, there will be Christmas markets, concerts and pink offerings at gay bars and clubs, as well as lectures and the Rainbow Fund’s prize presentation. One of the highlights will be the crowning of Lucia, followed by a “Pink Lucia” procession through parts of the city ending up with a big party. Good luck!

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noticias Cancún, convertido en destino perfecto para el turismo LGBT Cancún se convirtió en el primer centro turístico de México en firmar un convenio de colaboración entre la Oficina de Visitantes y Convenciones y la International Gay & Lesbian Travel Association (IGLTA) para la promoción y fortalecimiento de este segmento, que representa hasta 13% de los visitantes que recibe este destino del Caribe.

Ron Kuijpers, representante en México de la IGLTA, aseguró que, a nivel América Latina, Cancún se coloca como el cuarto destino preferido para el mercado gay estadounidense, superado por Buenos Aires, Río de Janeiro y Santiago de Chile. Actualmente, entre 7 y 13% del turismo que capta Cancún se identifica como de la comunidad LGBT, con una tendencia de crecimiento de 2% en los últimos dos años. El turita LGBT representa un gasto promedio de 1,667 dólares por pareja, frente a los 670 dólares de una heterosexual, detalló. La alianza busca potenciar este mercado publicitando una oferta de más de 15,000 habitaciones y spas, entre otros lugares.

candidata a presidencia en chile, Michelle Bachelet incluye el matrimonio igualitario en programa El Movimiento de Integración y Liberación Homosexual (Movilh) valoró que la candidata presidencial de la Nueva Mayoría, Michelle Bachelet, “se convirtiera en la séptima aspirante a La Moneda en incluir el matrimonio igualitario en su programa”.

“Sea quien sea quien asuma como presidente/a, debe además tener en cuenta que hemos presentado una demanda internacional contra el Estado de Chile por la prohibición del matrimonio igualitario, cuya tramitación ya inició en la Comisión Interamericana de DDHH. Esperamos que el futuro Poder Ejecutivo, sea cual sea éste, actúe con altura de miras en este caso”.

Valoran también otras propuestas presentadas por el Movilh al comando de Bachelet, como mejorías a la ley Zamudio, elaboración de políticas contra la discriminación, dotar al Instituto nacional de DDHH de gestión en materia antidiscriminatoria, ley contra incitación al odio y de identidad de género, aspectos también incluidos en los programas de Roxana Miranda y Marco Enríquez-Ominami.

Sin embargo, echan de menos “un pronunciamiento claro y concreto sobre la

adopción por parte de parejas del mismo sexo. Esperamos que la propuesta de Bachelet, cuando hable de matrimonio, incluya también la adopción, pues en caso contrario, se estaría pensando en una ley de matrimonio se segunda categoría”.

La ex mandataria presentó a finales de Octubre su programa de gobierno. Respecto

al matrimonio igualitario, la candidata señaló que “convocaremos a un debate abierto, con participación amplia para la elaboración y posterior envío de un proyecto de ley en esta materia”.

Prohíben valla publicitaria en San Salvador

México busca ser un destino favoriTo para el matrimonio igualitario

Empujado por el avance de la legalización de los matrimonios entre personas del mismo sexo en México, un negocio “incipiente, pero prometedor” se gesta en los destinos turísticos donde las parejas optan por festejar o pasar la luna de miel del enlace civil.

Una encuesta sobre turismo gay levantada en 2012 en México por la consultora internacional Out Now entre 652 personas de la comunidad LGBT, concluyó que al 65% de los entrevistados le gustaría casarse por lo civil en un futuro.

El turismo LGBT representa el 3% en México del total de viajeros domésticos e internacionales, según las cifras proporcionadas por la secretaría de Turismo federal.

El Consejo Nacional de la Publicidad resolvió suspender una valla publicitaria donde se favorece el lesbianismo, basado en el artículo 9 del código de ética que rige a la institución en El Salvador.

Al respecto, Sherman Calvo, Vice Presidente del CNP expresó: “En el Consejo Nacional de la Publicidad tenemos la obligación de velar por la ética permanente, estamos conscientes de nuestro compromiso con la comunidad, y la forma en la que este tema está tratado no cumple con los requisitos de respeto de principios morales de una sociedad. Lo que es responsabilidad respetar, son los derechos individuales de cada persona, incluyendo su sexualidad, pero jamás de lo privado de una persona llevarlo a un mensaje como este, que es retador y ofensivo”.

La argumentación del Consejo es que toda persona puede usar la publicidad para promover todo aquello lícito. Sin embargo

los contenidos, diseño y medios para las piezas publicitarias deben ser acordes a lo que se promueve y al público al cual se dirige. En el presente caso aunque lo que se pretende sea generar un cambio en los conceptos morales o percepciones sobre la diversidad sexual, esto no faculta para exponer los mensajes de manera irrestricta.

Calvo mencionó que el mensaje planteado en la pieza: “Viviendo el FEMINISMO. Soy lesbiana porque me gusta y me da la gana”, víncula directamente al feminismo con la preferencia sexual. El feminismo como objetivo primordial tiene el de la igualdad entre hombres y mujeres, lo cual es generalmente aceptado. “Es censurable también el hecho de usar dibujos animados para lanzar un mensaje como ese, valiéndose de ese recurso gráfico que sin lugar a dudas llama la atención a la población infantil. Inapropiado desde todo punto de vista”, dijo Calvo.

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yo soy mujer

por veronica espinal

tener gratitud ¡porque SI! Agradecer: Sentir gratitud.

Gratitud: Sentimiento que nos obliga a estimar el beneficio o favor que se nos ha hecho o ha querido hacer, y a corresponder a él de alguna manera.

Obligar: Hacer fuerza en una cosa para conseguir un efecto.

Casi siempre me molestaba buscar el significado de alguna palabra en el diccionario; principalmente porque el significado no me resultaba concreto. Cada vez que buscaba una palabra, tenía que buscar una ó dos más para poder descifrar el significado de la primera palabra en cuestión. Cada vez que le preguntaba a mi papá o a mi abuela algún significado, me mandaban al diccionario. Hoy por hoy, me parece una buena táctica para educarnos un poco más en el intento.

Esta vez me interesa conocer el significado de la palabra “agradecer” del diccionario de la Real Academia Española (léase arriba). He ahí el vivo ejemplo de lo que comente antes. Si agradecer es “sentir gratitud”, ¿por qué no le ponen el mismo significado de gratitud a agradecer y nos ahorramos un paso más? Claro, agradecer es un verbo, lo mismo que obligar. Pero…sinceramente, al buscar la palabra “gratitud”, esperaba encontrarme con un significado menos calculador.

“Gratitud: Sentimiento que nos obliga a estimar el beneficio o favor que se nos ha hecho o ha querido hacer, y a corresponder a él de alguna manera”. Me llamó la atención sobremanera la palabra “obliga” como parte del significado. Obligar es “hacer fuerza” para un determinado propósito. Quizá estoy sacando de contexto o exagerando esa sola palabra, quizá no. Siento que el decir “obliga” le da un gusto amargo a lo que, para mí, es el significado de “agradecer” y “gratitud”.

Ser o saber ser agradecido, y no por obligación, es casi un don.

Ser o saber ser agradecido, no sólo con los demás, sino con uno mismo…es casi un don. Por eso no me agrada que la gratitud se defina

como un “sentimiento que nos obliga”. Para mí, eres o no agradecida; y si lo eres, es porque te debe de nacer y no por conveniencia.

Entiendo que hoy en día resulta más fácil encontrar a alguien que se obligue a ser agradecida por conveniencia o beneficio, que a quien lo sea por nobleza. Y eso, ¿será culpa de los demás o de uno mismo? También existe la otra cara de la moneda: las personas a quienes el agradecimiento se les refleja en la mirada o en el tono de su voz. Ese reflejo es la consecuencia, que por nobleza, recibimos a cambio de aquello que hemos querido hacer. Y es que los sentimientos verdaderos son fáciles de sentir, como también lo son aquellos que son obligados.

Mientras se acerca en Día de Acción de Gracias, desempolvemos o pongamos en práctica un poco más el don de ser agradecidas. Pongamos en práctica el don de ser agradecidas con los demás, por los demás, contigo misma y por ti misma. ¡Vamos a agradecer y tener gratitud porque sí! Sólo mira a tu alrededor y verás que siempre tienes algo o a alguien por quien sentirte agradecida. Desde lo más insignificante hasta lo que para ti sea lo más grande que posees en tu vida, siempre tenemos el por qué sentirnos agradecidas.

Dicen que uno nunca sabe lo que tiene hasta que lo pierde. Entonces, ¿para qué esperar perder algo o a alguien para descubrirlo? ¿Por qué no darnos cuenta del valor que cada cosa o cada persona tiene en nuestras vidas y agradecerlo sin tener que perderlo?

Vamos a agradecer y tener gratitud porque sí. ¡Que disfrutes este Día de Acción de Gracias!

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eden pride events, pq monthly and the seattle lesbian presented the inaugural eden pacific northwest, a four-day women’s festival in seaside, oregon. see you in 2014! photos by eden pacific northwest / more photos at www.shemag.com

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10/1/2013 3:59:24 PM

with marissa cohen

on the shelves

I Am Malala

by Malala Yousafzai In October of 2012, fifteen-year-old Malala Yousafzai was shot, point blank, in the head by the Taliban for standing up for her right to an education. Refusing to back down prior to the shooting, Malala had often publicly spoke out against the Taliban about girls’ education rights.

One year after the near fatal shooting, she has become a symbol of feminist protest and global equality, and the youngest nominee for the Nobel Peace Prize. I Am Malala is astounding and inspiring, as is its young author.

Pride South Florida Presented The 26th Annual Fort Lauderdale Pridefest at War Memorial / March 2003.

One Foot Onto the Ice

by Kiki Archer Bestselling lesbian fiction author Kiki Archer is back with One Foot Onto the Ice, a romance about two former classmates who fall in love at a ski resort in the French Alps. Susan Quinn, once a shy, unconfident girl, is now a respected teacher at an all-girl’s school. Susan is shocked and surprised when she meets Jenna James, now a ski instructor. Fans of Kiki Archer’s novels will enjoy this tale of love come full circle.

The Cruel Ever After

by Ellen Hart In The Cruel Ever After, lesbian sleuth Jane Lawless’s penniless ex comes back into her life with plans for yet another scheme to make fast money: sell a priceless artifact stolen from the Baghdad Museum. Fans of Lambda Award winner Ellen Hart will love this excellent mystery, reprinted by the ever-amazing Bywater Books in a new edition.

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she classifieds accommodations

community groups/organizations

Key West’s Distinctive Resort

Pearl’s is an all-welcome historic inn offering guesthouse ambiance and resort amenities. With Key West’s One Human Family atmosphere, Pearl’s offers full breakfast, 2 clothingoptional (but bottoms up) pools, 2 hot tubs, gym, and poolside bar and grill. 800-749-6696. www.pearlskeywest.com.

THE HIGHLANDS INN — PA LESBIAN PARADISE!

Legal gay weddings. We have more brides from FL than any other state! 19 charming rooms, 100 private acres in New Hampshire’s vacation destination, the White Mountains. Pink Choice Award since 2007. www.highlandsinn-nh.com 1-877 LES-B-INN (537-2466)Hotels. 1-877-LES-B-INN • highlandsinn-nh.com.

Reach The Women of the LGBT Community!

Advertising in She: A Lot More Affordable Than You Think.

Call Today 954-354-9751 IT’S TIME FOR YOU TO BE IN SHE!

She Girls: Send us a color photo with contact information.

Email us at: info@shemag.com.

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she classifieds miscellaneous

she sisters

she searches SELL SOMETHING YOU LOVE Sales representatives wanted. Unlimited earning potential and some of the highest commissions in the industry! Sales experience, professionalism and a love for She a MUST! Dade, Broward, ORLANDO, TAMPA, JACKSONVILLE areas availiable. Send resumes to donna@shemag.com.

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with the village sage

scopes AQUARIUS JAN 21 - FEB 19 What you do now will affect not only your immediate future, but your long-term prospects as well. Think and look, before impulsively speaking or leaping.

Don’t let frustrations with doing the same-old thing prevent you from successfully completing your tasks.

You need to show leadership and focus in order to get others to embrace your ideas, especially if it involves making changes.

leo July 23 - aug 22 Your focus is inward, as you seek to strengthen the core foundation within yourself. Reviewing the past will be helpful in planning a better, more secure and fulfilling future. Use volatile energy to your own advantage by leading the charge forward into positive actions resulting in positive changes, including settling outstanding matters, and ridding yourself, and your home, of outdated stuff.

pisces feb 20 - mar 20 You are at an important point in your life right now when you will have to make major decisions that will impact the rest of your life. Take your time and dream the impossible dream, but back it up with facts and a practical plan. Reach out to like-minded others and express yourself freely, with optimism and confidence. Be flexible enough to take good advice and make adjustments to successfully reach your goals.

virgo aug 23 - sept 23 You’ve wanted changes in your life for quite some time and the planets are conspiring to give you more than you bargained for. Be ready to think on your feet as you get swept away with the tides. Look for answers to your angst within yourself, whether in dealing with everyday stuff or core issues. Be ready to make positive adjustments. In order to assure success, dream the impossible dream, but back it up with reality.

aries mar 21 - apr 20 Your attention needs to be on finding solutions to your on-going fiscal issues, rather than on venting your frustrations. Try to find common ground when dealing with others, instead of just breaking and running. The answer to present problems can be found in the past. Find it and adjust yourself accordingly in order to ensure a better future. Remember to use the 3 Cs: conversation, compromise and cooperation.

libra sept 24 - oct 23 Your focus needs to be on how to improve your finances. One way is to consider your spending habits and your impulse buying. Make a realistic budget and stick to it, even if it means passing up that bargain.

Another is to actively network yourself to different venues and ask for the business. Still another is to sell stuff you’re not using so for somebody else to enjoy, while you enjoy the cash flow.

taurus apr 21 - may 21 You’re finally ready to admit you need changes in your life and are ready to embrace them. You now realize that there’s nothing you can do but go along with them. You are being challenged to release all of the things and people in your life that no longer serve you. Be patient with yourself, keep focused on your vision of a better future and work toward achieving your goals.

scorpio oct 24 - nov 22 You’ll have to accept that the sudden changes in your life lately are not entirely in your control. The only thing you really can control is yourself. The best way to do that is to have a dialogue with yourself about your perceptions, attitudes and expectations. Objectively observe how you have created your own circumstances.

gemini may 22 - june 21 The planets are pushing you into a major over-haul of the way you live your life. It’s time to get into new and better habits in all areas, professional and personal, as well as financial. Don’t be impulsive now. Think through your strategies carefully, then invite input from those you trust. Set your priorities, use your network to further your agenda, and focus your energy into creating a healthier, wealthier lifestyle.

sagittarius nov 23 - dec 21 The planets are not only empowering you, they’re pushing you to finally delve into uncomfortable Issues. You’ll need commitment and patience to achieve your stated goals. You’ll need your infamous creativity as well. Focus on the positives and expand on them, while ridding yourself of the negatives, especially the negative self-talk. Yes I Can should be your new mantra.

cancer June 22 - july 22 You need to negotiate a deal between what you have to do and what you actually want to do. Remember, communication is key. How you say it is more important than what you say right now. Nip misunderstandings in the bud and enjoy spending quality time with loved ones. Your creative juices are flowing, as you envision a new improved you, with a fabulous future just around the corner.

capricorn dec 22 - jan 20 You are always looking at your finances and ways to improve them. Career issues are still center stage.

However, all work and no play is just wrong. Take advantage of the planetary energies to give yourself permission to have some fun with your friends. After the 10th, it will be effortless to clear up old misunderstandings and to attract influential people to your cause. Just be clear about your goals and how they may help you achieve them.

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