9 minute read
Cover Story
Miranda Nolte:
Living thankful and grateful for each day
By Chellee Unruh
Photos by Maggie Sweets Photography
When life hits you with an unimaginable event you were never prepared for you are left with two choices: You can let the gravity of what happened to swallow you whole and lead you down a dark path, or you can accept what has happened and move forward focusing on being positive, thankful, and grateful for each day. For Miranda Nolte, when life took an unexpected turn, she chose to make peace a priority, by not allowing negativity to exist in her world. She is no longer interested in trying to match the energy of those around her to just fit in. She has learned to remove herself from any situation that doesn’t vibrate her soul.
The ability to see life through the lens of gratitude is rooted in Miranda’s close family. A Sioux Falls native, Miranda, and her brother were raised in a home with loving parents that instilled values of working hard, being honest, following your heart, and to always do what is right. These family values were reinforced by the Catholic school system Miranda grew up in. She attended St. Joseph Cathedral as a kindergartner and graduated from O’Gorman High School. Throughout her childhood and into adulthood, spending time with family was always a priority. Miranda and her brother spent lots of time with their grandparents, especially during the holidays. To this day, Miranda carries on this tradition with her kids by spending the holidays with her parents and their grandparents.
A moment that would set the course for Miranda’s life happened during a family vacation. “We were on our way to California for a summer family vacation and we stopped briefly in Las Vegas, remembers Miranda. “I was completely enamored with the vibrancy of the lights and drawn to the sparkling city of Las Vegas.” “I never stopped thinking about Las Vegas after that trip so, after high school, I just had to see what else was outside of Sioux Falls.” Now as a mother, Miranda recognizes that her decision to move to Las Vegas at the age of 20 must have been excruciating for her parents. Despite their reservations, they supported her dream and let her go. It became the first best experience of her adult life.
“It wasn’t until I had kids of my own where I can say I now know that decision had to have been just agonizing for them, but they never showed that to me,” shares Miranda. “They smiled and showed me only love even though there was pain and worry behind their eyes.”
Miranda moved to Las Vegas to continue pursuing her degree in criminal justice which she started just after high school with her eyes set on the University of Las Vegas, Nevada. During this transition, Miranda applied for a job with the Las Vegas Metro Police Department. She completed the rigorous physical and written testing as required by the department. At the same time, she was trying to start her career in law enforcement she fell into her career in Insurance Sales. “I enjoyed it so much that I decided I was going see where that would lead me knowing I could always fall back on criminal justice if I wanted.”
Not only did Miranda find her career while living in living Las Vegas,” but she also found her future husband. “We were introduced to each other through mutual friends," smiles Miranda. "After our first date, neither of us went on another first date again, I guess you could say it was love at first sight."
After 7 years of living in Las Vegas, Miranda and her husband decided they would like to move back home to South Dakota. “Like many Vegas locals, the 24/7 city was a season of life for us, that season felt like it was coming to an end, and we were ready to experience new things. We missed the changing of seasons and being close to friends and family and constantly felt like we were missing out on important events,” recalls Miranda. “Ultimately though, my husband wanted to move back to work on the farm so he could lighten the load for his father and uncle and work side by side with his brother as the family farm transitioned into their hands as the next generation.” Miranda and her husband took the leap and traded their city of glitz and glamour for dirt roads, green tractors, and country living in Webster, South Dakota. Oh, and snow. Lots of snow. It was a good compromise; Webster was his home and it was just 2 hours away from Miranda’s home in Sioux Falls.
Miranda and her husband were together for nearly 10 years before marrying. “We were confident in what we had and didn’t feel the need to rush to put a label on it. We never emphasized getting married until we were ready to have children,” says Miranda. Miranda had always dreamt of getting married in her home church – the Cathedral of St Joseph, so in December of 2017, they exchanged vows in her family
church. Shortly after getting married, Miranda became pregnant with their first child, which they would later find out were twins, and they were beyond excited.
Life was sweet during the pregnancy and after the birth of the twins. It was hard at times being new parents, but they were happy. Then one day everything changed. When the twins were 5 months old, Miranda lost her husband unexpectedly. “In the most ironic sense of the word – he died of an enlarged heart.” “I say ironic because if you knew him, you would agree he had the hugest heart of anyone you could have ever met. It was sudden and extremely unexpected” shares Miranda.
Miranda’s husband was fascinated with music. Not just one type, he listened to all genres of music and was simply captivated by it. His passion for music soon became a huge part of Miranda’s life and she learned to appreciate it and let it move her just as it did him. “When my husband first died, I didn’t play a single ounce of music for 6 months because it just tore my heart out to hear it,” recalls Miranda. “There was so much resonation in a song, in every song and so much missing of him, always so much missing.” If she would ride in someone’s vehicle and music was playing, Miranda would immediately reach over and turn it off. Anywhere she went, Miranda would turn the music off. For 6 long months. “Then one day while the twins were playing on the living room floor, they got ahold of the stereo remote and somehow while playing with the remote they managed to turn on our home stereo and the music just started playing from one of my husband’s many playlists.” shares Miranda. “For the first time since he passed, I didn’t allow myself to jump to turn it off, I let it play. I stood there in a frozen state and let myself feel it to my core and amazingly enough, while it did bring me tears, it also made me feel alive.” “It didn’t make me sad, it’s like the sound of music dusted off my soul and breathed life back into it again.” “I was stunned because all that time I avoided music like the plague thinking it would bring me down a deep dark hole, but it did just the opposite.” “Instead, it pulled me out of that deep dark hole.” From that day forward music is back in Miranda’s life all day every day just as it was when her husband was there with them. “He taught me to allow music to light my soul on fire and make me feel alive just as it did for him and that is something I will hold dear forever.”
When someone so special dies, there is a massive disconnection with the universe. From the moment you’re told your loved one has died, there’s a seismic shift in your soul that you feel for the rest of your life. In a grief journey, or at least in Miranda’s experience, she completely lost all sense of who she was, and what her purpose was. Familiarities were no longer comforting but rather a foreign feeling. “After all, the person you are dies in that same moment that you’re told you lost your loved one, and you’ll never be the same again. But what can emerge from that hell can truly be something inspiring, authentic, and fierce.” “When I share with someone that loss changed me and they say, 'don’t worry you’ll get back to your old self,' I wonder if they understand what change really is. One of the hardest things about being human is that everyone will come to know grief and pain,” says Miranda. “It’s a difficult road to walk but one of the only ways to move forward is to allow yourself to sit with it and feel it all, it’s a personal journey. I’ve learned that grief and joy can absolutely coexist. Grief takes time but when I emerge from the flames, I want to be carrying buckets of water for those still consumed by the fire.”
Rising from the ashes after this life-altering event, Miranda has learned to live with presence, live with intention, not fret the small stuff, and love deeply. “The best days of your life can’t happen without you there,” says Miranda. She focuses on creating a life for herself and her children, thankful every single day to not just live, but to be alive. Embracing the changes that have occurred in her life Miranda has moved back to the Sioux Falls to be closer to family and to make a fresh start for herself and her children. While bittersweet, she is enjoying her new surroundings where she and her children can make new memories.
Miranda hopes to encourage other women by sharing her story and being a positive light for them. “An important woman in my life that I’ve always looked up to once shared with me a quote from our first female secretary of state, Madeleine Albright, 'There is a special place in hell for women who don’t help each other.' Those words have been entrenched into my soul ever since.” Miranda hopes that her story will inspire other women to not force anything but to allow themselves to flow with what genuinely feels right, no matter what their individual stories may be. She hopes her story will inspire other women to foster their growth, make their joy a priority, and protect their inner peace. One of Miranda’s favorite mottos is – “Know your worth, then add tax.” n
