UNCHAIN YOUR INNER STRENGTH by Maria C. Krause

U N C H A I N your inner strength

Exclusive interview with YVETTE BODDEN, freelance writer and Founder of AwkenedWoman

Make up tips: Easy ways to chose your Foundation, by Queen expert Elise McDonald

5 Signs you are in a Toxic Relationship, by Anza Goodbar

Creating a Blisful Life, by Jen Gagnon

Natural and Healthy Living with Celine Girard and Caroline Lynch

Traveling Blog, by Nadia Syapin

Y E N F F A G

E U Q L I V I N G I N MO J U N E

2 0 1 9

I S S U E

N O .

H E R D I V I N E P U R P O S E and much more...

what's inside

Editor's Notes

All you have to do, is BE in it for LIFE,

Make - up Tips and Tricks

Creating a Life of Bliss,

Travel Blog

Exclusive interview with Monique Gaffney

Business tips for female entrepreneurs

Relationships

5 signs you are in a Toxic Relationship

Book launch: Yvette Bodden

Health and Wellness tips and routines

Stop the comparison game

Best-seller book:: SHE RISES, with Rebecca Cross

Summer Reads

UNCHAIN podcast

our special guests and contributors

EDITOR'S NOTE Welcome strength"

"UNCHAIN

your

inner

This magazine’s full purpose is to reach out and help the souls who are looking to live a more meaningful and fulfilling life, learning to love who they are by unchaining their inner strength and full soul power.

Can we all agree that we have one life and one life only? So what not live it the best way we can by doing the things we love, spending time with the people we love and be as happy as we can be!

YOU CAN! You got what it takes to make it happen… You might just not know it yet, but trust me, if you’ve made it this far, you got what it takes to do what you want.

UNCHAIN your inner strength, wants to help you achieve that. We want to teach you what it takes to live your best life yet, to make everyday count, to help you get up every morning and be grateful of who you are and the choices you have made. You deserve to live a life filled of happiness and joy, doing what you love and loving who you are!

Maria C. Krause Mindset and Business Coach. Founder and Owner of UNCHAIN YOUR INNER STRENGTH

| 4 |

F L E

Just like most people, I once was living a life with no purpose and no meaning, I was lost, I didn’t know who I was anymore or what was I supposed to do with my life. I was working a job with the only purpose to pay my bills, and if I was lucky enough to have something left over, go on a one time holiday; I was living in autopilot, everyday the same thing, the same routine, the same “ol, same “ol… Thinking that it had to be more to life than this! Does that sound familiar?

Now, is my life passion, and the women who form part of this magazine, to teach others to do the same, embrace their own power and uniqueness. UNCHAIN your inner strength, is about finding your voice, finding who you are, finding your skills, your dreams, your desires… Live the life that you deserve to live! Each and everyone of our incredible experts share their most valuable tips and advice to help you on your journey to make your wildest dreams come true.

For a long time I thought it was impossible for me to do something different, mostly because I was afraid, I thought I wasn’t worth enough and I didn’t have what it takes to do something that actually made me happy and gave an income that could replace that job that I so much disliked.

They all have helped me make this dream come true; since the moment I started to read, I wanted to create my own magazine and thanks to their love and support, this is finally happening. I am 40 years young now, and life has just began once again! Let your inner child come and play, let it shine in its splendor and grace… Magical things happen when you start believing in yourself.

As I embarked in my journey to self development, I rediscover things about myself that I been hiding for a long time, talents and skills that I forgot I had; and through this discovery I learned that no matter what happened in my life until this day, I had the power to create the future that I wanted for myself, all I had to do was to get out of my own head and out of my comfort zone and start becoming the person I needed to be in order to achieve what I wanted to achieve.

Love, Light, BE Maria. XXX

| 5 |

"In order for anyone to achieve "success" in any area of life, whether business, relational or personal, it all begins with Healing Core Wounds"

monique gaffney UNCHAIN 20

| 7 |

s i , o d o t e v a h u o y l al ! e f i L r o f t i n i BE n e s n a i t s i r K a l l i m a C by

Camilla Kristiansen is a stylist, mentor, author of 33 books and the editor in chief for Spotlight magazine. Camilla lives in Norway with her husband and two daughters and she also finds time to travel the world and work from cities like Oslo, London, Milan and Paris with her VIP days Camilla's big passion is to help other women follow their big dreams. in life and business and manifest a life beyond their wildest dreams. Time has come for you to step in the Spotlight where you belong | 8 |

Yes, there might be people that are more

If you are a woman ready to unchain yourself and go after your dreams, then I know that you can do that. I did it back in 2015 and quit my corporate job. It is possible, but you have to be in it for life. You have to be willing to fight for your dreams. There will be times when you doubt yourself, there will be times when you want to quit, and there will be times when you feel like a loser. I get it. I have been there, but I kept going.

clever than you, more beautiful, they have all their ducks lined up and they seem polished and perfect online. None of them started that way. You are allowed to be you in mind, body and soul. You are good enough today, not tomorrow.To really get to success the fastest way is to listen to your soul, take aligned action and keep going. Day in day out. When no one buys your programs, keep going. When no one

Be willing to fail. Be willing to try things out 1000 times before it works out. Remember Edison? He tried over 2000 times before I got the light bulb right, and boy I am glad he did not give up.

likes your Facebook posts, keep going. When they ignore you, talk behind your back, don’t believe in you, still you keep going. All this has happened to me, it still does from time to time.

So if you don’t feel like an Einstein or

I ignore it all and I keep going.

Edison, still keep going. All you have to do is to be willing to be i it for life. Be bold

To have success you have to believe in

enough to go for that ultimate goal you

yourself, be bold, be brave, be authentic

have and let all your desires come true.

and listen to your own voice more than you

You have the power inside you to do

listen to what all the others are doing.

anything, just keep your eyes on your big

You have they key to anything that you

vision and never give up until you die.

desire. All you have to do is to be in it for life.

I look at it this way; if you love what you

One foot in front of the other, you will get

do it will not be work, if you do it for life it

there. And remember that it is not the

has to become a success. Don’t you get

destination that is the goal, it is to have

this? This is super easy math. «If

you

never

give

you

have

fun while you enjoy your ride called LIFE.

succeed».

You can and will do this. Nobody puts baby in the corner. You shine bright and you never ever give up. I believe in you. Love from Camilla

“STRENGTH AND GROWTH COME ONLY THROUGH CONTINUOUS EFFORT AND STRUGGLE." – NAPOLEON HILL, AUTHOR.

ELISE'S MAKE UP UNIVERSE

easy steps to chose your Foundation Hey beauties! When

comes

choosing

the

right

foundation it can be a bit of a minefield, particularly if you’re roaming the cosmetics aisles under artificial lights - and it seems like all you can see are lines of ivory and beige which all look the same! 😯 But fear not!Because this month I’m going to help demystify the process – with a quick guide on how to choose the perfect type and shade which will leave you flawless and fabulous! First up – look at your natural skin colour and intensity.

Your skin intensity is how

light or deep the colour of your skin is – usually

measured

scale

very

light/light/medium/dark or deep. Identifying your undertones Knowing your undertones is so important, as foundation has different base colours which work with your skintone to colour correct and

give

you

the

most

natural

finish.

Choose the wrong one and it can leave you looking

sallow,

loompa orange!!!

yellow

even

oompa

♀ |

If you are unsure, the quick and easy way to discover your undertones is to look in the mirror and assess whether your skin has any areas or tinges of pink, red or

COMBINATION –

yellow.

cream

Choose

foundation

with

liquid

lightweight

setting powder for those areas prone to · If your skin has a hint of yellow or olive

it,

you

have

shine.

warm

undertones

SENSITIVE

· If you have pink or red, you have

based, non-comedogenic formula which

cool undertones

won’t irritate your delicate skin. What sort

· If you don’t have any, you have

of coverage do you want?

–

use

natural

mineral-

neutral undertones So now you have a measure of your skin

What sort of coverage do you want?

intensity and tone e.g. light and cool (that’s me! 😂 ) - with liquids, creams,

· For a sheer, dewy finish - BB creams

powders

are perfect.

and

tinted

moisturisers

choose from – how do you select one?! ·

you

are

looking

for

Choosing the right foundation for your

medium/buildable coverage - liquid or

skin type

pressed powder foundations are great.

It is so important to select a foundation that

will

work

with

your

skin

type,

· Or if you prefer a fuller coverage –

otherwise you run the risk of caking,

choose a cream foundation or opt for a

irritating existing skincare complaints or

buildable liquid

the make up literally slide off your face!

foundation. If your skin is combination or

DRY - For dry skin types the best options

oily, team with a finishing powder to help

are BB creams (tinted moisturizers which

your

give you a light colour with a boost of

breakthrough.

base

stay

put

and

avoid

shine

moisture), lightweight liquids or a cream foundation. And finally…always test them first! OILY - Powder foundations are great for

Select three shades then swatch them on

keeping oilier skin matte throughout the

your jawline (not your hand!!) and go with

day – but make sure you use an oil free

the

formula. I use the Touch Mineral Powder

disappear into your skin.

foundation which is oil free and doesn’t

So now you’re all set – here are some top

clog your pores – and it keeps the shine

tips on how to ensure that flawless finish

at bay all day!

every time.

closest

match

that

appears

UNCHAIN 14

It’s a crime not to prime The temptation is to moisturise and just apply your base, but using primer really is crucial to getting that flawless finish – but why? Primer is like Polyfilla for your skin 😂 – it works to smooth the surface of your skin, minimising the look of fine lines and pores - leaving the perfect base for you to apply your make up. Using primer will also help make your base product last much longer. But make sure you use a foundation and primer which has the same base for the best finish. For example, if you team a silicone-based foundation with a water-based primer, it will literally slide off your face! Not what you want when you’re in the middle of an important meeting – melting make up!! For best results, after moisturising wait a few minutes before applying primer to your face, then a couple more before applying your foundation. Choose your weapon – beauty blender, brush or fingers?! How you apply your base product will also affect the finished look. For more of a sheer finish, apply the product with your fingers or a beauty blender. Or for a medium to full coverage choose a brush or a damp beauty blender. If using a cream foundation opt for a brush with tightly packed bristles like a Buffing or Kabuki Brush which are perfect for blending these out as they are denser than liquid forms. And remember to always apply foundation to your neck area to avoid any tell-tale tide marks!

Other quick top tips · If applying concealer, use it after foundation for best results · For a longer-lasting base, use a setting spray or setting powder · If you love blush but find it sits too powdery on your skin, apply it immediately after using your liquid or cream foundation – it will transform it into a cream blush! · Focus primer on problem areas that you want to hide, like fine lines and enlarged pores · Looking bleary eyed but no time for eyeshadow? Apply foundation over your lids too for an instant eyebrightening effect! UNCHAIN 15

Hope that helps ladies! But of course, you

can

make

even

easier

for

of my business I provide a free colour matching consultation to help you select the perfect shade and product for you. Pop me a message if you’d like to know more – beyoutifulbelles@outlook.com I’ll be back next month with some more top tips, but in the meantime, you can catch me live on Facebook on Tuesdays and

Fridays

at:

https://www.facebook.com/elisemcdo nald24 .

ELISE MCDONALD

yourselves if you like – because as part

join

VIP

group

My background is in marketing and advertising, but

one

consultation

just

drop

message! All products featured are available on my

website:

www.youniqueproducts.com/EliseMcD onald Have an amazing month and remember – be happy, be you BeYoutiful Belles endorses Younique products as they are 100% natural, mineral-based, hypoallergenic and are not tested on animals. Many of our

| BeYoutiful Belles |

https://www.facebook.com/groups/bey outifulbellesVIP/ or to book in a one to

up lover, poodle fancier and business owner at BeYoutiful Belles.

For more tips, special offers and comedy shenanigans,

I’m Elise, mummy to a gorgeous 5-year-old, make

after working in agencies for 15 years, health issues meant that I had to look for another way to work, and I discovered that network marketing could give me the flexibility I needed. I have been running my own business promoting and

selling

100%

natural,

mineral-based

and

cruelty free make up and skincare for the last year now and I feel truly blessed to have finally found something that I feel truly passionate about – and my ethos is all about helping to empower and uplift women

and

make

them

feel

good

about

themselves, inside and out. You will mostly find me trying out the latest crazy make

trends

and

hacks,

product

testing

unconventional ways, doing live tutorials while my little boy hares around in the background stealing

products are also gluten free and

my brushes, and sharing my musings and outlook

vegan – ask me for more info! The

on life on my Facebook page.

company was set up to support The Younique Foundation, a charity which

Feel free to join the fun and live action on my

supports survivors of sexual abuse

from

www.facebook.com/elisemcdonald24 - and for

across

the

world

through

profile

retreats and awareness raising. For

top

www.facebook.com/groups/beyoutifulbellesVIP

information

visit:

tips

make

and

skincare

visit:

https://www.youniquefoundation.org

UNCHAIN 16

An intimacy building retreat for couples who want to enhance their communication, confidence, connection, and sexuality... Open your heart to feel more connected to life, yourself, and your partner

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT MORE!

ACTIVATING YOUR BLISS! ARE YOU FEELING TIRED AND AT A LOSS? ARE YOU READY TO UP LEVEL AND FINALLY ACTIVATE THE BLISS WITHIN YOU?

If you’ve said yes to these questions, I feel you! I see you and I remember how it feels to be exactly where. You are! I used to be there, feeling lost and not knowing where to start to get my life back on track! I’ve been on this journey of self discovery now for the past 7 years, and I’ll be honest, it wasn’t always easy…it still isn’t!

You see, the Universe will provide us with opportunities to grow and expand every single day and whether or not we take those opportunities is up to us. When the Universe finally has had enough, it will bring you a 2X4 beside the head and that will be your final wake up call!

I had to face some pretty uncomfortable shadows, I’ve had to work through a lot of “junk” in order to get where I’m at today. I’m still not done. Every day that I wake up is an opportunity for me to show up even more authentically than I did the day before. I’ve learned along the way that I create my reality, I choose what I focus on and I alone am responsible for my happiness! This was one hard realization I have had to come to. In all honesty I had to battle my worst enemy…ME!

This may be hard to hear if you’re at the beginning of your journey, or even if you’re in the middle of it, but when you trust this truth and you work with it, your life changes. For me, it changed in small increments with each shift I would make and today, when I look back on the woman I was and the woman I am today, we’re two very different versions of me. The old me was impatient (okay, I sometimes still am ;)), negative, focused on all the things I wanted and therefore focusing on lack, overwhelmed, stressed and unhappy! The old version of me wasn’t bad…she simply didn’t trust, herself for the Universe.

Knowing that what I focus on expands and that all those years that I was focusing on a glass half empty or when I was focusing on all that wasn’t going as I desired in my life, was just bringing me more of the same! Coming to the realization that all the things I was unhappy with were there because I wasn’t willing to learn the lessons life was presenting me with. I wasn’t ready to work through them.

I no longer wish to be anything more or less than that which I’m called to be, because I know with certainty that I am exactly who and where I need to be in this moment. I do the work every day to not let stress overcome me.

Today, I can proudly say that I wake up each morning (90%+ of the time) with a fire within to live my best life now… because I know now is all I have. I no longer focus on all the things that didn’t go the way I planned, but on the things that I have right now in this moment, that we all too often take for granted! I wake up every morning with a grateful heart, I’m grateful I get another chance at this thing called life. I’m grateful I have another opportunity to paint my canvas and use new eclectic colors. I’m grateful for the roof over my head, the food on my plate and the connection I have with myself. I’m grateful for the opportunity to learn a little more every day and be a better version of me. I wake up knowing that I’m meant for more than just surviving and dying! I’m meant to thrive and have an impact on this world. I know that I get to live my life’s purpose every day as I take actions that are in alignment with said purpose.

I continue to release fear of what is to come or regret over what has been…I choose to focus on the present moment and all that I AM right here, right now. I consciously pay attention to my thoughts, my words, my actions and my reactions. I pay attention to my feelings and make sure that in every moment, I’m focusing on all that serves my highest good and leaning into the feelings of bliss, joy, gratitude & love. All of this expands my heart space. You know that feeling of butterflies in your stomach on that first kiss, the feeling that runs through your body when you stop and feel the sun on your skin, the feeling when your child is born, the feeling you had when that beautiful baby of yours smiled at you for the first time????? These feelings are the ones I lean to every chance I get…the feelings are pure and allow me to live a life of bliss NOW!

You see, we waist so much of our lives living in fear, stress and overwhelm. We spend so many hours of our lives worrying about things that are out of our control when we could be using that precious time to live fully and blissfully! It’s all a choice, and let me tell you, when you finally wake up and start doing the work, you become amazed at all the little things. Today I wake up and am amazed by the greenery outside, the flowers that are blossoming, the beauty that lies in each snow flake that falls, the glistening of the sun on the ocean, the feeling of the wind on my skin, the smell of salt in the air when I’m at the beach, the beautiful melody that comes from my children when they’re giggling, the chirping of the birds in the morning. These may seem to be little things, but one day you too, will come to realize they are everything!

I no longer live worrying about others opinions or demands, I choose to do the things that bring me joy and that light the fire within me. I no longer ponder on what others think of me, because I’ve learned it truly is none of my business and is simply a reflection of all the things they need to work through for themselves. I am no longer confined by the programmings of our society, but rather the freedom of my soul.

JEN GAGNON HOLISTIC HEALTH COACH. MARCONICS PRACTITIONER

HI, I'M JEN A HOLISTIC WHOLE HEALTH COACH, BLISS ACTIVATOR & ADVANCED MARCONICS PRACTITIONER! MY MISSION IS TO EMPOWER WOMEN TO RECLAIM CONTROL OF THEIR LIVES THROUGH DETOXIFICATION OF ALL AREAS OF THEIR LIVES, MINDSET WORK, HOLISTIC HEALTH AND FOR THOSE THAT ARE READY TO TAKE IT TO THE NEXT LEVEL, ENERGY HEALING! FINDING YOUR BLISS IS YOUR BIRTHRIGHT, THAT'S WHAT I'M HERE TO ACTIVATE IN YOU!

It’s all about perspective…it truly is. When you start to shift the way you look at things, the things you look at will shift. Until you’re willing to get uncomfortable and get real honest with yourself, you’ll remain where you are. You’ve heard it before but you can’t keep doing the same things over and over again and expect a different outcome. If you truly desire to live your best life, trust…trust the process. Believe that everything you desire is right there waiting for you to finally take charge. It’s waiting for you to love yourself enough to know you are capable of beautiful things. So, to you that’s out there reading this feeling down…I see you, I hear you, I feel you…but remember that the life you see others living, the life you desire is right there, right now. The question is….will you reclaim control, trust and allow it all to come to you or will you continue doing the things that have kept you chained to this vicious cycle of yours?!?!?

If you’re looking for support, reach out, I’m here to help you reach new heights!

JEN GAGNON |Holistic Health Coach. Marconics Practitioner|

"IF YOU THINK ADVENTURE IS DANGEROUS, TRY ROUTINE... IS LETHAL!" -PAULO COELHO

I’m a little confused about life right now. Seems crazy, right? I know, from the outside I look like I’ve got it figured. I’m working on building my blog. Family and friends are telling me how much they like it. Yet I’m so confused. About life. About what I should do.

I’m So Confused About Life: 6 Ways of Dealing With It

I’m taking off to New Zealand soon with my little brother, and then continuing to points beyond. I’ve gotten my first two freelancing clients, and a great reviews on the both projects. But I’m still freaking out in a corner, trying to figure out how to life. I felt like life had lost it’s colour. Like I was treading water with no hope of ever getting out. So I set out with a goal, and a plan that was created along the way, learning new skills, but somehow, along the way my insecure inner self grew into a ravenous monster. It started bombarding me with all those insidious little thoughts that, in my case, sounded more like a bellowed internal monologue. |

TRAVEL BLOG

BY NADYA SIAPIN

For example: Step back and take a Moment:

What do I really think I can accomplish here? Am I good enough? I’m not good enough, am I? How can I tell if I’m good enough?! Of course family and friends tell me they like my work! They love me!

That’s right, turn off your computer and phone, step back and walk away. Basically, I don’t give a damn how you do it, just back off from whatever it is that’s rolling through your mind 24/7. It ain’t good for you.

Then there was the mental rocking in a corner hugging myself as I’m trying not to panic, internally screaming “I’M SO CONFUSED! WHAT AM I DOING?! I’M CRAZY! I’M INSANE! AAAAAUUUUUGGGGHHHH!!!!”

For myself, I also admitted how I’m feeling to my naturopath the last time I saw her. I told her I had a few things to say to myself about the stupidity of it, and she replied, ‘Good, now I don’t have to.’

Anyway, you get the picture. You might find yourself in a similar situation, where you have a goal but things still don’t feel right, and maybe it’s getting a bit much. Maybe you’re more confused about life now than you were before.

She also gave me a few reminders for things to do to help and IT WASN’T WORKING! Well, it wasn’t until I unplugged, anyway.

This is a good thing: You gotta break old habits and old comfort zones before you can find new ones.

It’s interesting what getting away from electronics for a few days can do. Last week, I was fried. I could barely see straight, at least internally. I gave up 90% of what I’d planned to do over the weekend, and I feel much better for a bit of time off.

So you might find yourself wondering what you can do to alleviate this uncomfortable, horrible, state of mind. I can’t guarantee these will work for everyone, but work down the list. You never know if it’ll work until you try it.

TRAVEL BLOG

BY NADYA SIAPIN

St rangely enough, for as long as those bras lasted, if I ever felt off, worthless, or whatever, I’d wear one and feel so much better. It is very hard for your brain to yank you around on the petty stuff when you’re wearing a hot pink and diamante bra.

Self-Kindness Looks Different from Person to Person. I tend to buy small, useful pretties for myself. This last time, I bought myself a red tiger’s eye mala necklace – my favorite rock. I can hold it up to the light and see the sun burning in the

Do something Kind for Yourself:

center of the beads, roll them through my fingers and feel their smoothness. If

you’re

into

crystals

and

One thing we, as women, have a damn difficult time with is acknowledging that we’re worth it. We’ve become brainwashed by the culture that if we’re not slaving constantly for the people around us then we’re lazy, high-maintenance women.

their

meanings (I got these at a psychic fair. I went to find bamboo socks and came away with these because the socks weren’t there!) the paper that came with the necklace says tiger’s eye helps enhance confidence and self-

And that’s simply not true.

esteem.

So when you’re stressed and so confused about life that it’s virtually spinning around you, the first thing you need to do is give yourself a moment to breathe. Go outside. Read a book. Have coffee by yourself or with a friend. Take a nap, bath, or shower. Get a massage or a manicure. Buy yourself a pretty.

There you go, 2 things that I’ve been lacking! The last time I bought a little pretty – interestingly, right before I made a life-changing decision – I took myself to

the

mall,

because

I’d

been

promising myself a pretty new bra.

It’s not so much about what you do, but how it makes you feel.

I didn’t wear nice underwear often, no point when you spend all day 6 days a week sweating through 4 layers of

Also, don’t confuse trying to fill a void by buying shit you don’t need with a bit of basic self-care. This one is a topic all on it’s own, and one I can’t really address, having only witnessed this problem and not actually suffered from it myself.

clothing. This time, though, I had to make the choice that I was worth spoiling. I went to Victoria’s Secret, spent a bit of money, and had 2 pretty little things to use as talismans in the future.

y r T n o i t a t i d e M

TRAVEL BLOG

BY NADYA SIAPIN

Try Meditation:

Coming on the heels of crystals and their meanings, lets get into meditation. I’m not talking about sitting in lotus, with your fingers in circles saying ‘ohm’ while clearing your mind and thinking of nothing. I’m more the ‘lie down and stare at the ceiling for a while’ kind of person. Seriously,

that’s

technically

meditation. Lie down and stare at the ceiling. That’s all it takes. Do that for 10 minutes a day, every couple of days. There

are

tons

benefits

meditation which are backed up by studies.

Don’t forget to Eat:

When I was going through the worst of the freaking out, I’d look at the time and think ‘I should eat. No, no, I’m nearly done. I’ll eat when I’m done.’ 3 hours and halfway through another project later, I’d look at the time and go through the process again. End result: I didn’t eat until 8 or 9 pm, with no food and little water all day.

Remember to Breathe: Lift your head and take a moment to appreciate what’s around you. Yeah, yeah, if you stop breathing, you die.

get

it.

Shut

up.

Sit

down

and breathe. Count your breaths. In for 4, out for 4. Repeat until you calm

Is it any wonder I was falling apart?

down or fall asleep, I don’t care which.

Funnily enough, as soon as I ate, I felt better able to deal with my problems, and general confusion about life in particular. Weird how that works, almost like you need to eat to live.

When you get that worked up, you can’t focus. You need to stop, and if you concentrate on breathing, it can help you relax.

TRAVEL BLOG

BY NADYA SIAPIN

The t ruth is, you have to stand up and ask for that help. It’s difficult, but you need that outside perspective to really get lasting result s. What did you like most? What did I miss? Tell us in the comments below! This is not meant to help people suffering from depression, only those who are overwhelmed by life and having a hard time getting through the confusion. If you are suffering from depression, please seek help. You can contact Beyond Blue or Better Lyf. Comment below if you’d rather. Just don’t go through it alone, please!

See a counsellor: Contrary to popular belief, you don’t have to be in a full-blown depression to see a counsellor. Nor does it mean you’re broken. Just like we go to the doctor’s or the dentist’s for checkups, we should go see a counsellor or therapist for our mental health. Michelle was brilliant, letting me get all my anxiety off my chest, offering an insight here or there. She asked a few questions,

aimed

guiding

towards the understanding of where this

was

all

coming

from,

and

finishing up with advice to keep in mind as I travel. After my session with her, that final little knot of confusion in my chest finally loosened up and let go. I got lucky this time. I was able to nip it in the bud before it snowballed into a monster of issues that usually leaves me a gibbering mess.

It’s

important

recognise

what’s happening inside your head. Too

often,

attitude,

bad

thoughts,

something

that

harmful seems

minor like being confused about life sneaks up and before you realise it you’re in a tangle, standing in the wreckage of your thoughts thinking ‘What happened?’

NADYA SYAPIN, TRAVELING BLOGGER

Nadya was raised in Oregon, US, and Australia. She is an avid hiker and backpacker. It's her goal to walk the Canterbury to Rome pilgrimage trail, both for bragging rights and for the time to think. The blog started with a walking trail, and it continues because of what she learned with all that thinking space. Founder and Owner of : UNDER DIFFERENT STARS blog

t i r i p s e e r f

THE

I N O

RV NTE

IEW

E U Q

F GA

Y DED E N UI R SPI

COA

"I finally remembered my Purpose and stepped into my role as The Spirit Guided Coach. I now serve the world in teaching people how to heal their core wounds so that they are free to step fully into THEIR Purpose." Monique Gaffney

UNCHAIN: when did discover your passion to help

UNCHAIN: Monique, you coach both in

others?

Business and Mindset; which one of them do you think are more important or relevant to achieve success and why?

MONIQUE: You know what's interesting is when I reflect back, as early as a young child of 10 years old, I knew I

MONIQUE:

was called to "help people".

I prefer to call myself a Purpose Coach, and all of my work with my clients, no

When people asked me what I wanted to be when I

matter if they come to me for personal

grew up, in my younger years I proudly answered, "A

coaching or business coaching, begins

pediatrician!" As I grew into my teen years, that

with Healing Core Wounds.

evolved into wanting to be a child psychologist. Into adulthood I stepped into the role as a Mentor to teen

My absolute belief is that everyone will

moms, and then became a health and fitness coach,

only achieve a certain level or amount of

always trying to fill that void that told me to "help

success based on their Core Wound

people". It wasn't until 2 years ago that I finally

Healing.

remembered my Purpose and stepped into my role as

They can say all of the affirmations they

The Spirit Guided Coach.

want, and they might work for a bit, but

I now serve the world in teaching people how to heal

soon enough the limiting beliefs (aka the

their core wounds so that they are free to step fully

Lies as I call them) will crop up again

into

answers!

because they are attached to a core

hahaha! The short answer would be I always knew I

wound that the person has tucked deep

was meant to do something that would help people in

inside. In order for anyone to achieve

a great way...and I believe that EVERYONE hears

"success" in any area of life, whether

that call at some point in their life.

business, relational or personal, it all

THEIR

Purpose.

That's

the

long

begins with Healing Core Wounds. The "success" is all a measure and/or UNCHAIN:What

did

you

before

becoming

indicator of the healing work one is doing.

coach? MONIQUE: Before becoming a Life and Business Coach I was in the real estate industry for 17 years, in almost all capacities. I did very well, making a 6-figure salary career without college as a hispanic teen mom drop out who only has a GED. I drove a Mercedes, lived by the beach, traveled..."living the dream"...except I was

miserable.

Chasing

the

money

and

titles,

climbing the corporate ladders, but not pouring one drop into my soul's calling to serve the world in a bigger way. It wasn't until 2015 when I began honoring that calling and stepped into health and fitness Coaching and saw what an impact I was making. I like to say I got bit by the "Purpose Bug". ;)

UNCHAIN 21

UNCHAIN: Was there a breaking point in your

If you have never heard what a Mourning

own life in which you decided it was time to

Dove sounds like, it "hoos" very similarly to

make some changes?

an owl, and as a child, I always thought I was hearing owls. How clever for Spirit to speak to my Inner Child with my sign, right?! After

MONIQUE:

pulling an "all nighter" with God, all those

There was, and it was a big one.

horrible thoughts, that wrestle with my Spirit and Ego, the tears and finally full surrender

July

and

in telling God, "Show me a mourning dove. If

fitness

I am on the right path, show me a mourning

company I partnered with, and was set to go

dove and I will do whatever you say next.

on a trip to receive it all. It was the height of

Open the doors and I will walk through them."

all I had worked for; the "next step" and

In desperation and full surrender, I made my

"milestone" in building that business. You

Soul Contract with God and fell asleep at

would think I would be over the moon. But

4am. At 6am, I woke to my husband standing

again, just like in my corporate career, I was

next to me bedside, and saying, "Babe, are

miserable, but this time, it hit me closer to

you ok? What are you doing sleeping here (I

home since that "Purpose Bug" had bitten me.

was in our daughter's room because I was up

I sat on the edge of my tub the night before I

so late)?" And with eyes still closed, groggy

was to fly out and cried to my husband, not

from only 2 hours sleep, I heard it. I bolted

wanting to go, and sobbed, "WHAT IS THIS

up like a waffle in a toaster, hushed him and

ALL

the

excitedly said, "Shhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! LISTEN!!!

recognition and accolades meant nothing in

Do you hear that?!?!?" Confused he says,

the realm of Purpose. But my Ego told me,

"Uh yeah, it's a bird at the window..." "That's

"You worked hard for this, you deserve it!".

not

recognition

2017 from

FOR?!?!?"

earned the

health

soul

big

title

and

knew

that

"just

bird",

that's

MOURNING

DOVE!!!!! Do you hear the way it sounds?!?!" Reflecting back, I believe that it was a fight

I could not contain my excitement. I mean,

between my Soul and my Ego - and both were

literally in a matter of 2 hours and a blink of

pretty good at the battle, but my Soul was

sleep, God answered me.

finally taking over. It all sent me into a silent depression that I told NO ONE about. Not even

I blurted EVERYTHING out to my husband,

my husband. After all, I was "strong", and I

told him about my silent depression, and my

needed to be so for my family...and for my

covenant with God. He was not nearly as

clients and followers. No way could I come out

excited

and say how I was feeling: that I had thoughts

confused but it didn't matter because in that

of, "What if I'm not here anymore? Will my kids

moment, my eye were OPENED, and I was

be ok?" I knew I couldn't live with thoughts like

AWAKE and my Soul had won the battle.

and

probably

even

that and I didn't WANT to. I was in the middle of listening to The Universe Has Your Back by

And from there, it all took off like a rocket.

Gabrielle Bernstein (to this day, that book holds a special place in my heart), and was at the chapter where she tells you to ask God for a specific sign if you are needing guidance or direction. So I did. I asked for a sign, and in a roundabout way (a longer story for another day hahaha!), the sign I asked for was a Mourning Dove. |

UNCHAIN: What are your favorite Mindset routines to help you keep aligned and in tune with yourself?

MONIQUE: Believe it or not, I don't have any mindset routines! I follow something I created and call the Checks and Balances of Mind, Body, Spirit & Purpose. Think about your car for a second. If the "check engine" or "system warning" light pop on, you or your mechanic immediately do a "check and balance" on your car - check the tire pressure, check the oil level, check the water level, check the batter life, check the spark plugs...you check everything until you find out what set that light off, right? Well our life is the same, except we shouldn't wait for a "warning sign" to pop on. We should be taking care of our "life vessel" every single day. So each day, we should check the system, and the system that keeps us aligned is: our mind, our physical body, our spiritual body, and our Purpose. When all 4 of those are aligned and in-tune with God, we feel GOOD. We have that feeling that we are "in flow" and "aligned" and manifesting more and all the ideas and Divine Downloads flow in abundance! When any of that "flow" slows down, it's because one of those buckets needs filling. It's the ULTIMATE self-care. So every day I make sure I do ONE THING in each of the "wheels" of my Life Vessel. For mind it's something mentally stimulating, whether that's a podcast, an article, a course or reading a book. For physical body, it could be working out, drinking celery juice, going for a walk, or just stretching. For my spirit it's usually meditation, but could also be listening to my favorite soul-stirring music, doing a chakra cleanse or simply going outside to stick my feet in the grass for a 20-minute grounding session. And for my Purpose it means that I am doing SOMETHING in my Purpose work. That could be making a call, checking in with clients, planning my next post, applying for speaking gigs or even interviews with purposeful magazines like this one :) Let me tell you - the days that I am feeling low, tired, cranky or anything 'not aligned", I do a "system check", look at each of the 4 buckets and can quickly see which one I have neglected or need to give a little more love to. And this is something I teach my clients to do, as well!

UNCHAIN 20

I created and launched a course

business, what were some of the

cause "that's what coaches do" and

biggest lessons that you've learned

what my coach taught. Guess what

that you wished you would have

happened?!

done

but

happened!! I did all the work and it

learned the hard way...like most of

did NOT feel right! Sure I sold it, sure

us? LOL!

it got great reviews, but it my Higher

UNCHAIN:

When

when

you

first

comes

started

above

what

Self was waving red flags that I ignored. But everything is a learning MONIQUE:

lesson and nothing is wasted, so the

I have two, I hope that's ok! :)

bright side is now I know how to create and launch a course! :)

1. The first and most important: I also created a Facebook group.

LISTEN TO HOW IT FEELS. Please don't get this confused with

Newsflash about Monique: I HATE

your FEELINGS, because feelings

RUNNING

can be deceiving. But how it FEELS,

about myself going into Coaching,

which is more connected to your

but I ignored it and followed the

Intuition,

your

crowd and did what they all did and

Inner Knowing. Does something in

opened a group....that I couldn't keep

your business feel "off", or "not quite

up...and

right?" Listen to that and dig into

read The Big Leap finally admitted to

where that is coming from. Often

myself that it's not even in my Zone

times we push through it, ignore it

of Excellence...OR Competence! The

and tuck that away, when it was

lesson there was grace for myself. At

guidance that we are slightly off

least I tried, and learned. :)

your

Higher

Self,

GROUPS.

knew

flopped...because

this

after

track or might need to shift direction. In order to avoid both of those (and 2. The second, and maybe equally

trust me, you'll learn lots of lessons

as important: DON'T DO WHAT

along the way, so don't worry about

EVERYONE ELSE IS DOING.

avoiding these "lessons" ;) ), I would

Just because all the other coaches

recommend to anyone to hire a coach

are creating and launching courses

that helps you find your Purpose, and

doesn't mean you have to if you are

will

not called to. Just because every

discover

other coach is starting a podcast and

YOU.

empower what

and

equip

you

that

looks

for

having success doesn't mean you need to, too. Just because every

Serving the world in any capacity,

other business and their momma

whether as a Coach or any other way

have

doesn't

is NOT cookie-cutter, one-size-fits-all

mean you have to, too!! I made

- it's individual and unique because

these mistakes (well except for the

that's exactly how God made us.

Facebook

group

podcast! hahaha!!)!!

UNCHAIN 24 |

UNCHAIN: Was there ever a time that you felt like you weren't meant to be doing what you do? If yes, what was

The Big Leap taught me how to get out

the driving force behind it all that made

of my Zone of Excellence and INTO my

you keep on going?

Zone of Genius (aka my true Divine Purpose), all the ways I self-sabotage and how to STOP doing that. From that

MONIQUE:

moment forward, everything was crystal clear and I knew exactly how and who I

This is a great question and my answer

was to serve, and my Core Wound

is yes!! I also found that many coaches

Healing teachings all came together,

feel the same way at some point and

and

once again, you can guess what the

what

you

goal, something is mis-aligned and you

are

are off the mark from your true Divine Purpose.

quite right. I knew it wasn't "wrong" clearly

coaching

something

God this

just

that

you have to "hustle" to achieve your

describing. I felt like something wasn't because

from

doing is feeling "hard", "forced" or that

coaching business in 2017, I had a of

forced

to anyone reading this: if what you are

About 4 months after I launched my feeling

felt

moment forward. In fact, my message

answer is... PURPOSE!!

similar

nothing

led

capacity,

wasn't

When we are in our Zone of Genius -

our true Divine Purpose, it never feels

but

hard. Sure there's work that needs to

completely

be done, but it does not feel "hard" and

aligned. It just didn't "feel" right.

you don't groan when you have to do it. It's exciting and full of joy, no matter

Gratefully my coach recommended I

the task. Any other feelings are red

read The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks

flags, and as your Coach, I would

(another book that goes down in list of

challenge you to look at where you are

life changing books!), and it's like a

in your Purpose.

light bulb went off: I still wasn't 100% in my Purpose. I was doing "all the right things"

creating

and

selling

courses, opened a group, all my posts and marketing were great and I was getting from

great

reviews

work,

but

and

feedback

something

just

wasn't quite right.

L B ig he

IN T nd

p ea

y O m

me ht

e Zon

y wa

se s I

s lf-

how

s n iu

get to

(a k

ota

out

tr my

an ge

on y Z m of ue

ow d h

ne iv i

S TO to

f e o

Pur

o P d

l x ce

l ), a os e

th in g

n ce

h l t

UNCHAIN 24 |

35 |

UNCHAIN: You have 3 beautiful daughters... How has your journey impacted their lives? Do they want to become entrepreneurs too when they grow up?

MONIQUE: Ahhhh this is such a fun question and I love answering it! My journey has GREATLY impacted my girls. My older one differently than the younger ones. My oldest is 23 and my two younger ones are 7 and 5.5, so they got different experiences of my journey, and each grasp what I do differently. My older daughter can understand Healing Core Wounds and is doing that work herself. My younger ones grew up seeing me work out and meditate, so it's something that's embedded in them. They ask me to workout with them, and will plop down and meditate unprompted on their own, in the most random, public places. I love seeing them connect to their Spirit in such a natural way - the way we were intended to! All 3 of them are health and food conscious, which I am also proud to have taught them as a foundation to living a fulfilled life. So proud of my oldest who has been a vegan for 2 years, and my little ones who talk about what is a healthy choice and what is a treat. :)

UNCHAIN: Can you share one of your best advice for someone who's still trying to find their Soul Purpose and passion in life? MONIQUE: Absolutely. If you are still searching for your Divine Purpose, my first advice would be to do core wound healing work. Only when we heal our core wounds, are we then free and open to step fully into our Purpose. My advice for someone who does know what their Divine Purpose is but isn't crystal clear and something about your coaching or business "doesn't feel right", I highly recommend reading or listening to The Big Leap, removing anything from what you're doing that is keeping you in your Zone of Excellence, and taking the leap into your Zone of Genius (aka your Divine Purpose) UNCHAIN 24 |

36 |

A day in Monique's life:

We do lunch usually at home unless we pack for the day, and for dinner, we are free-range

I wake up when I wake up - my girls are pretty

with that, too. Our pantry and fridge are full

self sufficient and will usually go downstairs,

of healthy snack options for my kids to graze

flipping

themselves

on all day, and both girls are different in their

breakfast. Occasionally my 5.5 year old will

food likes/dislikes, and my husband also has

come in and lay with me until I wake up which

his own meal plan he follows, so we all just

is sweet.

eat what we want, when we want! I will make

the

and

make

the girls dinner if they request, like spaghetti First thing when I wake up, every day, I thank

or turkey burgers or tacos (cause tacos are

God, Holy Spirit and Jesus for another day

LIFE!), but many times one of them will

awake and alive, and I thank my body for

request

functioning and working. I know not everyone

dinner, or a protein waffle. It works for us and

gets that every day and is not something I

is a really stress-free way to do food at home!

apple

and

almond

butter

for

take for granted. Hubby and I get our QT in by binge-watching I'm not a pop up and go kinda girl and never

a Netflix show together. We are big GOT fans,

have been! haha! I lay in bed for about 15-20

and just finished the new season of Sneaky

minutes, letting my brain finish waking up

Pete this week, so if I don't have book club or

and receiving the messages my spirit has to

a deadline to meet/work on at night, that's

give.

down

what we do together every night, and I love it.

dreams or messages/thoughts that come to

:) Bedtime for the girls is typically 8:30,

me when I wake. Morning thoughts are just as

sometimes later on the weekend, but they

powerful as meditative thoughts/downloads

usually fall asleep by 9 on our laps in the

because we are still in that same state - not

living room.

fully

Sometimes

awake

and

journal

open

write

receive.

It's

beautiful thing if you've never tried it!

And we still co-sleep, so we're all 4 crowded in our king sized bed until I can't take the

After I get up, I put on my infamous Pink Robe

Sliver of Hope I'm hanging onto anymore and

first thing (those that know me KNOW my

go sleep in one of the girl's rooms! hahaha!!

Pink Robe - she is famous on her own!), and

And I fall asleep to a meditation on my Insight

head downstairs for celery juice, water and

Timer meditation app. It's my favorite app to

coffee (usually in that order, but not always!).

find a guided meditation (and it's free!), so

I practice intermittent fasting so I don't eat

whatever I am feeling in need of for the night

breakfast, but all that liquid keeps me full so

or to reset or start my day off tomorrow with,

I'm not hungry until about 12/1pm!

is what I'll listen to as I fall asleep.

I recently moved from homeschooling at a

And then I wake up and do it all over again,

learning center (like a school) to unschooling

and love every moment of it!

girls,

don't

have

schedule

anymore since we don't have to be at a

**Please note: fighting kids, dishes in the

campus. We kind of go with the flow since it's

sink, picking up dog poop, TSwift on repeat

child-led: some days we have an activity or

and changing out guinea pig cages are also

meetup planned; some days the girls want to

included in most days**

go to the library or indoor playplace, some days we do nothing and they watch tv all day. Yep, that's how we roll and it's GLORIOUS!! :) In between all that I have my 1:1 client calls, group calls, trainings, or whatever I might have on calendar for my business.

37 |

y e n f f a g e u q i n o m ! e m i r p r e h at

UNCHAIN 20

"When you’re grounded in reality through mindfulness, you strengthen your intuition so you’ll make better decisions" Dr. Tristan Sophia. Mindset Coach and Impact Strategist Dr. Tristan Sophia helps female coaches and healers fearlessly share their story, so they stand out from the crowd, attract their soulmate clients, and make their lasting impact. Her clients learn how to use their own healing stories to create their purposedriven, successful business. One key to their success is becoming an observer of their ego and increasing their mindfulness.

Dr. Tristan Sophia was a clinical and forensic psychologist for 20 years before becoming a Board Certified Coach for entrepreneurial women. Her transformational journey of surviving

and

thriving

after

bullying,

depression, and alcoholism created her nonstop passion to inspire women to stop wasting time in self-doubt and fear and get into courageous action to achieve their soul’s desires. Her favorite activities are writing, speaking, yoga, and watching Christmas movies (all year-round!). She lives in the mountains of Montana, with her husband and three rescue pups.

39 |

A 3 W O PR

TO S Y

T UC

S BU

R MO

U YO

S NE

Could you be more productive in your

What does being mindful look like

biz?

for your business?

When

distractibility

makes

your

Being mindful stops the overthinking,

productivity decrease, your biz results

so you’re engaging in present-minded

suffer.

business tasks.

What’s the solution?

When you’re focused on the present, you’ll make better decisions.

Mindfulness You

won’t

letting

past

regrets

Mindfulness is the ability to be fully

(spending $5K on a coach who wasn’t

present in the moment:

too helpful) or future fears (“Is anyone

You observe your thoughts, feelings,

gonna buy my course?”) sway your

and

decisions, so you’ll be empowered to

physical

sensations

with

the

intention of accepting where you are

make better choices for your biz.

right now. Acquiring mindfulness isn’t a one and done. Like meditation, learning how to be

mindful

takes

practice

and

persistence.

ways to increase mindfulness: Be Aware of Your Breath ose your eyes and take a deep breath in.

his technique is super simple:

Take a deep breath in for 4 seconds

Fill up your stomach, and your chest, with air

Hold for 4 seconds

Slowly let your breath out for 4 seconds

Visualize tension leaving your body as you breathe out

ckhart Tolle says one simple breath in and out is a meditation. 2-Use All Five Senses to Experience Life Try it right now…get mindful about your touch sense: >Close your eyes >Feel the chair underneath your body >Feel your fingertips on your laptop >Feel the floor underneath your feet >Feel your arms resting on your lap When you do this, you become aware of your touch sense and stop thinking (relief!). When you pay attention to and deeply experience any one of your senses, it gives you a sense of peace because you’re keenly aware of the present moment. Practice this with all your senses and increase the time by a few seconds each time.

UNCHAIN 7

>When

3-Use Sticky Notes:

you’re

grounded

reality

through

mindfulness, you strengthen your intuition so you’ll One of my favorites:

make better decisions >Mindfulness helps eliminate negative self-talk

Put sticky notes around with words that’ll

>You’ll improve your ability to focus and will be

remind you to be mindful.

more productive in a shorter amount of time >Mindfulness gets you out of the comparison trap

Currently, I choose a word for the day, so

>It helps you be truer to yourself and judge yourself

each morning after my meditation, I select a

less

word I feel aligned with at that moment.

>Being mindful (i.e., being observant without judgment) expands gratitude, which brings you out

I write it on a few notes and place them

of scarcity mindset and into abundance mindset (a

around my house.

necessity for a successful and sustainable biz)

Put

them

different

places

everyday,

The more often you bring awareness to each moment,

otherwise you’ll get used to seeing them and

the easier being mindful becomes.

ignore them.

It’s like anything else you learn; eventually it’ll become a So yes, I’m not telling you to sell more of your

habit you don’t have to think about before you realize

programs, do more live videos on Facebook,

you’re already doing it (Remember learning to ride a

or make some cold calls (I’ll never tell you

bike or sending out an email to your list? Now you do it

that!) to be more productive in your biz.

without overthinking).

I promise you that mindfulness will directly

And there’s no end point with mindfulness: the more

benefit your business in ways that wearing a

you do it, the more benefits you’ll receive.

sandwich board won’t:

Dr. Tristan Sophia, Mindset Coach and Impact Strategist |

relationships HOW TO ATTRACT BETTER RELATIONSHIPS AND FRIENDSHIPS

To build a better relationship with the world, you have to start by building a strong, compassionate and understanding relationship with yourself first. Once you learn how to love and accept the woman that you are, in full, the world around you will fall in love with everything you represent. Start with you... The rest will follow! |

UNCHAIN YOU INNER STRENGTH

Finding your true self after a toxic relationship Emotional and physical abusive is a subject

Emotional

abuse

that is not easy to talk about, although a

unworthy, useless and lost; I didn’t recognize

huge percentage of women around the world

myself;

go through it, only few find the strength to

powerful

open up and talk about and what they’ve

importantly, I try to deny it. In my heart, I

gone through. Most people feel ashamed, is

couldn’t believe that someone who claimed to

something that they never thought in a

love me so much, could be so hurtful through

million years that it could happen to them so

his words; in those moments, I chose to be

didn’t

left feel

woman

feeling

like once

broken,

the

strong

and

was,

and

most

blame

forgiving and hoped that he didn’t mean the

themselves for finding themselves in these

hurtful words that were coming out his mouth.

situations. There’s also fear, which is one of

Let’s be honest, is so much you can take, until

the biggest factors for which women stay in

you start believing it, right? If a person keeps

a relationship that is unhealthy and unsafe.

telling you how useless, ugly, fat, unworthy

they

take

full

responsibility

and

you are; you slowly start believing and feeling

The reason why I chose this topic for this

it, until that’s the only way you can look and

month’s issue of UNCHAIN YOUR INNER

feel about yourself.

STRENGTH is mainly to create awareness, and even if we live and area where women are becoming more outspoken and share

Physical

abuse

their life’s journey to help others, this is a

guard, it was mixed up with a combination of

topic that is still hard to bring out in the

drugs,

open.

frustration from both sides; so when the first

alcohol

caught and

completely

personal

anger

off and

punch was thrown at me, I followed right back,

Some of my friends still ask me what

to defend myself. The inner voices started

affected

crawling on my head as soon as I defended

emotional abuse, and until this moment, I’m

myself “Is it my fault?”; “Did I deserve it?”;

still

“Have I done something wrong and now karma

not

me able

the to

most,

the

answer

physical

that

question

is getting back at me?”; “How did I end up here

sincerely.

and why?”. |

Speaking from my own experience, and

When I finally gathered the strength to get

from being on both sides of the fence;

out of the hell I was living in, I had to make

someone who’s been abused and someone

drastic decisions in my life. I quit my job; I

who watched someone being abused; I can

cut contact with most of the people I knew

certainly say that shame, self blame and

then; I moved back home, far away, to

fear are one of the biggest factors why

another continent; but I know that not

women

everyone has the opportunities that I had

who

are

abused

stay

the

relationship longer than they should.

when

the

time

came

up.

People

circumstances are very different but what we all have in common is that we DON’T In my case, my abuser was someone

DESERVE BEING MISTREATED and that

powerful, I was petrified of sharing my what

is up to us to get out and we all deserve to

was happening in my life with my closest

be loved and love and appreciate it by who

friends and family; part because I was

we are.

always putting a front, I showed them what I wanted them to see and not what was really going on; I didn’t want them to feel sorry for

We can’t change the other person, no

me or worst, say things like “What have you

matter how much love and understanding

done now?”; which it happened when I

you are willing to offer them. They are

finally decided to share it for the first and

fighting with internal demons that they don’t

last time with one of my closest friends.

want to see or face, and is easier for them to throw their insecurities and frustration onto someone else.

“We can’t change the other person, no matter how much love and understanding you are willing to offer them.”

Life has taught me a lot of things and

You are not a punching bag!

one of the most precious ones is that I deserve to be happy and be loved. I deserve to live a life where I can be

You are not the dumpster of angry emotions!

myself, in full, and accept myself the way I am. I stop seeking for outside validation the moment I decided to walk out that door and never look back. Every

You are not someone else’s reason why their life is not the way they wanted to be!

day is a new day, and every day I am grateful to myself and the Universe for giving me strength and power to know that I am worthy and I am loved and that I deserve flowers, rainbows, date nights,

You are not what has gone wrong in their lives!

compassion, forgiveness and LOVE, I know now more than ever that I deserve LOVE, in its full form and kindness.

You are not responsible for their demons!

5 signs that you are in a

TOXIC RELATIONSHIP BY ANZA GOODBAR

You feel like you can’t do anything right!

3 4 5

You feel like your thoughts, feelings, and opinions don’t matter.

Every day is a challenge, you’re constantly waiting for “the other shoe to drop.”

You’ve lost your identity. Do you feel like you have to wear a mask to be accepted?

You feel constantly judged or ridiculed. Are your ideas belittled? Is personal growth scoffed at?

Do you think you might be in a toxic relationship? If so, you’re not alone. All of us, at one time or another, have experienced a toxic relationship. It might have been with your parents, a lover, a friend or with your children. Sometimes it’s so subtle, you don’t even realize you’re in one. Toxic relationships can have a profound impact on our self-esteem. They can cause us to second guess ourselves and become withdrawn and anxious. If you’re feeling like you’re just not yourself, consider these five signs that you might be involved in at least one toxic relationship.

You feel like you can’t do anything right. Do you

You feel like your thoughts, feelings, and opinions

struggle with feeling like you’re just not good enough,

don’t matter.

no matter how hard you try? Do you feel like you’re

heard? Do you feel like you’re being talked at and not

constantly under attack for just existing? Do you

talked to? Do you feel undervalued or disrespected?

Do you feel like you’re not seen or

obsessively apologize for your actions? If you can relate to any of those questions, you may If

you said yes to any of the above, you may be

have a toxic friend, family member or co-worker. It

experiencing toxicity in your relationships. We all

might feel like being in the Army. You know, someone

have an inner voice who acts as our critic. That voice

giving your orders and wanting you to comply no

was designed to keep us safe in times of danger and

questions

it can even cause us to play small in life, but it isn’t

disregarded

there to make us feel less than.

contributions not wanted or needed.

My ex-husband had a way of making me feel like I

Several years ago, a VA client of mine had a difficult

was incapable of doing anything right. He constantly

time expressing her needs, when I’d try to anticipate

criticized my parenting skills, my exuberance when I

her needs I’d inevitably miss the mark.

told a story, and the things that interested me. It

explaining what she would have preferred, she would

made me feel insignificant and like I needed to

scream at me and express that I wasn't’ to think for

become someone else to be accepted.

myself, I was just to follow orders to the letter, no ifs,

asked. and

Your you’re

feelings left

feeling

input

are

your

Instead of

ands, or butts. That lead to me being filled with If your inner voice is being fueled by external input

anxiety every time I saw her name pop up on my

from a friend or family member, it’s time to evaluate

phone or in my email. She never gave me the

the truth of the messaging you’re listening to. Over

opportunity to share my perspective, she always had

time, if we are told we are inadequate we begin to

to have the last word.

adopt that belief and our actions will start to reflect that belief.

If you allow others to step on your toes and cut you off, eventually you will adopt a poor self-image and begin to doubt your abilities and worth. Long-term this can be damaging and affect other relationships in a negative way.

Every day is a challenge, you’re constantly waiting for “the other shoe to drop.”

Are you unable to

One of our deepest human needs is to feel like

enjoy the basic things in life? Are you unable to feel happy?

we belong, but we never feel that way if we

Do you always feel like you’re being

are unable to be our authentic selves. There

attacked?

are many different types of abuse, physical, emotional, and spiritual. The scars abuse

Many years ago, I worked for a CFO at a prominent non-profit

organization.

had

leaves aren’t always visible on the outside but

imposing

can have a lasting effect on the inside.

demeanor that had a negative impact on his staff.

We feel contantly judged or ridiculed. Are

While he and I got along well, I saw the damaging conversations

that

happened

with

his

your ideas belittled? Is personal growth

direct

scoffed at?

reports. Many of them tried to please him, only to be chided about their ineffective performance.

When I was married, my husband always came up

They constantly walked on eggshells trying not to

with reasons why my ideas would fail or why I was

set off his tirade of insults.

inadequate to pursue a dream no matter how big or small. Any suggestion to improve our marriage

Toxic relationships can have a negative impact on

or me personally were shot down as they didn’t

those around you, even if you are not the target of

have value. Over time I began to feel like I was unworthy or undeserving of having a better life.

the toxicity, it bleeds into the atmosphere. The negative energy has a way of impacting everyone

We constantly evolve, that’s part of living. As we

in the vicinity. Just like a bad apple will spoil the

encounter new experiences, we grow and change.

whole bunch, a toxic relationship can ruin the

ability of a team to perform well together.

environment. Toxic relationships can make it feel

choose

shrink

expand

with

our

like we don’t have a choice. Fear of upsetting the

You’ve lost your identity. Do you feel like you have

toxic person can create a cycle of self-doubt and

to wear a mask to be accepted? Do you feel like

fear of taking action.

your opinions fall on deaf ears?

Do you feel

uncomfortable in your own skin?

If you can identify with any of these signs, chances are good that you’re a part of a toxic

If you can relate to people pleasing behaviors to be

relationship. Don’t dismay, there is hope for turning

accepted,

toxic

the tides and empowering yourself to create

relationship. My husband was abusive to my kids,

positive changes in your life that will impact your

his way of controlling me was to take it out on my

relationships.

you

may

involved

kids. I constantly second-guessed myself and how it would impact his moods and actions. I tried to be who he wanted/needed me to be to keep peace in our home, but I always came up short. I could never be that perfect person and inevitably he would explode. After years of living this way, I became a shadow of my former self.

Look for the silver lining. There is always a good side

Practicing self-love and self-care can guide you in making healthy choices that will change the dynamics of how people interact with you. Implement these selflove strategies to take control of your life and create the types of relationships you long for.

to any negative situation. Look for the gift in any given scenario. Even toxic relationships allow us opportunities to learn and grow. Determine what you want to get out of the relationship, perhaps it is practicing advocating for yourself, or perhaps you feel sexy and attractive around this person, maybe it allows you to shed guilt about feelings of having an easier life than they do.

Choose to be grateful for the opportunity to grow Set boundaries. Recognize that we are all energetic

through the relationship. There is value in all

beings. Take inventory of how you feel when you’re

relationships if you shift your perspective and identify

around certain people. If you are feeling drained,

what you want to gain from your interactions with

disappointed, or like you give more to the relationship

these people.

reduce the amount of time you spend with them. Allow yourself time to recover in between interactions. Choose your inner circle carefully. We all have toxic

Relationships are an energy exchange, choose to

relationships to some degree. There is no escaping

spend time with people who help fill your cup rather

them, but we can choose who we spend the majority

than empty out your energy reserves. If you must

of our time with. Seek out people who want to grow

spend time with an energy sucker, spend time filling

and expand their lives in a similar fashion.

your energy reserves before you meet with them and refill your cup after your interaction.

Be proactive in how you interact with others. Be willing to be accountable to your inner circle. Give

Some relationships can’t be ended due to family ties so

your tribe permission to call you out when you buy

it’s important to find coping strategies to make it

into toxic behaviors. Encourage each other to show

tolerable and protect your inner child. Offer yourself

up as the best version of yourselves. Let your

compassion and kindness when you feel like you’re

positivity be contagious.

subjected yourself to toxic people that have impacted your self-image or confidence.

Be self-compassionate. Shame can cause us to be drawn to toxic relationships. Work with a coach, therapist or use a Take responsibility for your thoughts and

journal to examine past relationships and the part of you that

actions. Find activities and people that

seeks them out.

make you feel good about yourself. It’s This may require you to forgive yourself for the part you

your responsibility to feel whole and

played in allowing the toxic behavior to persist.

loved. Loving yourself will diminish the power others have in making you feel

The best gift you can give yourself is permission to let go of

small or insignificant.

the past and embrace the future with the belief that you Practice meditation, journaling or prayer

deserve to have a life built on loving and edifying

to lean into your feelings. Creating an

relationships.

outlet so energy can flow and not get stuck in your body will allow you to express yourself more fully. Give yourself permission to share your thoughts and feelings in the face of opposition. Others may disagree with your ideas, but that doesn’t mean they are rejecting you.

As an intimacy coach, I work with people in all types of relationships. Many of the couples I work with are seeking better physical intimacy, but that can’t be achieved until the emotional intimacy issues are resolved. Toxic people will not allow intimacy to exist in the relationship because the power in the relationship is one-sided. |

ANZA GOODBAR Anza Goodbar is a certified coach, trainer speaker and best-selling author. She has contributed chapters to two anthology books, Your Shift Matters: Resistance to Resilience and You’re Never Too Old To which will release this month. Her newest book project, Activate your life will come out in August, 2019. Through private coaching, group coaching programs, retreats, and speaking, Anza inspires and empowers couples to redefine what they want in their relationships and create strategies to go after it. She is passionately committed to opening up conversations about sexual empowerment and supporting couples to conquer incompatibility issues, communicate their wants, needs, and desires; and increase intimacy and sexual satisfaction. She works with individuals and couples who feel disconnected from their partner emotionally and/or physically and want to rediscover, rekindle and reignite the passion they once felt in their relationship. She creates a safe environment to explore sensitive topics that lead to more meaningful and fulfilling relationships. She guides couples who are coping with the loss of libido, difficulty achieving orgasm, infrequent intercourse, or menopausal issues to be receptive to concepts and techniques to bring healing and restoration to their physical relationship. You can learn about Anza by connecting with her on social media: www.anzagoodbar.com www.instagram.com/anzagoodbar www.facebook.com/coachanzagoobar

F R E E L A N C E

A R T I C L E B Y Y V E T T E W R I T E R A N D F O U N D E R

B O D D E N O F A W A K E N E D - W O M A N

2 Ways to nurture the most important relationship in your Life Women are natural-born multitaskers

Even when there is no time we carve it

playing role of mother, daughter, wife,

out of somewhere playing host during

cook, housekeeper, nurse, assistant,

holidays, birthdays and family events.

timekeeper, teacher and anything in

between! We juggle the management

everyone

of our homes, children, and careers

sacrificing

flawlessly. If you pitch any other balls

choose

in our direction, we’re likely to hit it,

external

too. Selflessly, we extend ourselves to

innately

volunteer time that we don’t really

finding our value in how much we can

have

do for our loved ones.

our

kids’

school

PTA

Association to ensure recognition as supermom. |

make

every

effort

happy

many

ourselves.

focus

are

make times

Why

relationships? we

nourishing Because

caretakers

often

My marriage lasted close to 10 years. During this time I made every effort to fulfill all my husband and daughter’s daily needs. I’d wake up each day to prepare breakfast, take her to school and get to my own job planning events. I’d rush out of work at the end of the workday to pick her up, make dinner and help get her settled. The next day we’d start the race all over, again. I loved it, if I had to repeat it, I would in a second. I’m a mom; she is my joy and most important accomplishment. I enjoyed being a wife, although challenging, as it took a lot out of me but wellworth it for love.

Self-Care: Make it your business to prioritize me, myself and I. Vehemently, love yourself! Taking care of your needs will ensure you are mentally and physically strong to help care for your loved ones. Schedule time with yourself at home or outside, is always best. It’s more efficient to leave the home since there is usually something on the to-do list. Disconnecting completely while inside the nest takes much discipline not always doable. Try doing something you enjoy and will make you smile like a kid in a candy store. Treat yourself to a class at the gym, spa, coffee shop to read favorite book or a nature walk. It will surprise you, how this time can reinvigorate you. Practice self-forgiveness, it’s OK to delay the laundry or set the dinner table 30 minutes later. We are beautifully imperfect not robot machines. Being the best you also means making allowances for yourself. Don’t be so hard on your own person.

Funny, how quickly time flies. I’ve now been divorced about the same amount of time, as I was married. I’ve completed many life lessons over the years. However, the most important one has been to prioritize the relationship with myself. Personally, my biggest happiness is making others happy but I can’t do that if my inner-self is neglected. By doing so, the wear and tear will begin to weigh me down.

Stay Present: Live in the moment. Breathe in the life you’re blessed to have letting out any energy your body doesn’t need. We zoom by the minutes, hours, days that we forget to stop and enjoy what we have – health, love and time on earth. Living a full life doesn’t have to be piling up as much activity as you can onto your day. It’s more about the quality and shape you give each day.

The effects trickle down mentally, emotionally and physically. In order to avoid crashing into the abyss of exhaustion leading you to losing myself there are two things I cannot do without.

The priority list begins with your name. Start today – make it count. |

53 |

UNCHAIN 18

OPENING UP YOUR HEART: CONVERSATIONS WITH FRIENDS

DD O B ETTE

UNCHAIN:

Yvette, you are the Founder and Owner of AWAKENED WOMAN, can you tell us how and why did you started this amazing movement? YVETTE:

Divorcing my daughter's father was a life-altering event. The heartbreak and sadness that came after the separation changed me. It set me on a path of self-discovery. I believe this part of the painful journey was necessary. It led to finding my passion, ultimately, leading to a purpose. The realization that there were other women like me, feeling similar pain pushed me to share my experience to help others with theirs. It was that moment that gave me the courage to own my story. The awakening was the start of a new phase to help me become the woman was meant to be.

55 |

UNCHAIN: I' m curious, as a young girl, where did

you imagined yourself being at the age you now are? What were your dreams? What did you wanted to do? YVETTE:

As a young girl, I was most certainly a romantic! Wanting to have a family, white picket fence, and child or dog - or both. I always had a desire for a career (not truly sure what it would look like for me) because I wished for it to be both lucrative and fulfilling. As an adult, I understand the sacrifices and work involved. It is never perfect nor easy but we can have more than a relationship with the right person. Someone who accepts you for all that you are as a woman and human being.

UNCHAIN:

What

was

the

breakthrough

biggest

you

discovered

when you started writing?

UNCHAIN:

You now love writing and dedicate your life to it; you have wrote over 300 articles, blogs and stories in such a short period, less than a year... Where does your inspiration come from?

YVETTE:

I'm

not

sure

that

genuinely

believed that what I had to say was important enough for people to listen or read. Writing these articles and book has changed the way I see myself. We can all

YVETTE:

learn from one another. There are

I'm inspired by life around me. Random conversations, books

personal

articles

read.

experience, Life

has

immense amount of material to pull from as a writer. We just need to pay attention.

different

ways

women

can

empower each other - sharing information,

experiences

and

stories are extremely powerful. It is the most important lesson I have

learned

since

bega n

writ ing Awakened-Wom an.

56 |

UNCHAIN:

UNC HAIN :

I know it's a personal question and I

You are soon to launch your first book,

understand if you'd like to skip it, but if you decide not to... Are any of these stories and which one in particular,

congratulations! Tell us what is it about? And when is it officially launching so we can go get it as soon as possible!

related to your own experiences in life? YVETTE:

YVETTE:

course,

expect

these

type

questions. AW is personal, it is me sharing many stories including mine. There stories

are

quite

such

large

"Do

number

Believe

You

Woman's Intuition" "Time Waits for No One" "Modern Family Portrait" "Shape, Craft and Mold Your Happiness" "The Yes Monster" "Grateful for Exes" There are so many of the blogs that have a piece of me in some way. The only way to connect and be relatable is, to be honest,

and

open

about

experiences. There is no shame because we all have a story.

Thank you! Yes, the release date of July

4th

quickly

Black Rose Writing will publish "A Journey to Finding the Best Self" is the story of an average, everyday woman

can

experiencing moment.

did you ever think it was going to become such a huge inspiration for other women who have gone through some similar challenges as yours?

to,

life-changing

Having

her

world

crash

man she believed to be the love of her life. The book takes you on her vortex

sadness,

anger,

and

confusion then brings the reader out to the other side of that pain. The woman

that

awakens

after

the

She

becomes the woman she was always meant

demonstrating

that

when you do the hard work and never give up on yourself, amazing things happen. The story draws the of

love,

depression,

There were no expectations when I began AW. My goal was to share and help women everywhere feel less alone. No matter where we are in the world or where we come from, as women we face many of the same issues in every by

eventually

reader in by allowing them into my

YVETTE:

connected

connect

down on after losing a marriage, the

journey

are

all a

empowered.

When you started AWAKENED WOMEN,

approaching!

ordeal is stronger, wiser and more

UNCHAIN:

aspect.

these

common stories. It gives us the ability to help each other in some way.

hardship,

57 |

dating

parenting, up

relationship, heartbreak

hurt,

financial

after

divorce,

after

divorce

co-

finding

yourself

after

your

identity

finding and

love

creating

after a

new

dream after another after your life blows up. The goal is to encourage other women to live their best life, too.

anger,

forgiveness giving

separation,

58 |

UNCHAIN:

Have you ever even imagined that some day you will be writing your own book or was it something that just happened?

UNCHAIN:

And last, a question I like asking all my guests... What is a day like in the life

Yvette

Bodden,

women,

entrepreneur, mother, writer, human

YVETTE:

The book wrote me, it was not

being?

something I had imagined doing for an extended amount of time - or ever. I felt it needed to be written to help inspire others.

YVETTE:

There aren't enough hours in the day. I wake up to get breakfast ready before we head out for the day.

UNCHAIN: For women who would like to write

their autobiography, are there any tips or advice that you would like to share with them?

Work a full day as an assistant then come home to write AW, emails, start dinner and get ready for the next day - to do it all over again. I answer

messages,

marketing

YVETTE:

Write your story - just start. Whether you write for yourself or others, it all starts with a pen or computer. Just begin.

commute

during or

while

brand

the brushing

daily my

teeth or sneak it in before bedtime! If I have an idea or inspiration, have to find the time to put words on paper, tweet, and connect with AW readers. We have to strike while the iron is hot! Honestly, the 5 hours of

UNCHAIN:

You have a teenage daughter, how does she feel about your writing and what you're currently doing?

most out of the hours we are awake. weekend hours with the people I

one

biggest

cheerleaders. Inspired to make her dreams come true and be relentless in her pursuit of what she wants for her

life is short. We have to make the I make up by spending my free

YVETTE:

She

sleep on average is not enough but

future.

Empowering

her

making my dreams come true is one of my greatest achievements.

59 |

love because that is what fuels me. The re-energizing comes from their support and the moments together, as well as carving me time - it is a MUST do for an Awakened-Woman .

YVETTE BODDEN |FREELANCE WRITER. FOUNDER OF AWAKENED-WOMAN|

Ms. Bodden has written a collection of over 200 articles between AW, Thrive Global Digital Magazine and DivorceHub. Her articles, essays, short stories can be found on https://awakened-woman.com. Her first book “A Journey to Becoming the Best Self” is set for release Summer, 2019. Her contributions can be seen on Thrive Global, SmartCoparent and DivorceHub, as well as her blog. Yvette’s compelling articles about women in life, love, Latino culture, divorce, co-parenting, motherhood, abuse, dating and relationships demonstrate compassion and understanding for people and real-life situations. Readers can relate to her writing because it comes from personal experience demonstrated through her words. Her writing reflects a deep connection with the various issues related to women. She is as passionate about her message as she is about her writing – to inspire, encourage and empower women everywhere. She is a co-parent, divorced, single-working mother. |

60 |

Healthy and Natural Living

The Benefits of Essential Oils By Caroline Lynch.

Exclusive distributor for Young Living

I got interested in Young Living Essential oils the way many do, I had wanted to target a specific health concern and a good friend showed how Young Living essential Oils could greatly improve this issue. At that time I had no idea that these oils would greatly impact on so many of my family’s health and wellness needs. Now 5 years on I use them from everything from balancing my hormones, targeting energy levels, promoting a restful night’s sleep to making home-made skincare and cleaning products. As a mother of two I feel reassured that I have Essential Oils on hand for all our healthcare needs. I’m proud that you will not find any pharmaceutical drugs in our home. But like many essential oil users we have re-occurring health issues that need support, for myself and my son its respiratory issues. If I’m ever in doubt I’ll collaborate with our doctor, she’ll assess our symptoms knowing Essential Oils are our first protocol and give us a time-frame by which we should see an improvement in our symptoms feeling reassured by a second opinion we have managed to safely stay away from antibiotics and other prescription drugs.

"I use essential oils for balancing my hormones, targeting energy levels and to make home-made skincare and cleaning products. "

61 |

Healthy and Natural Living

Where is a good place to start using essential oils?

There are three ways to use these oils: *Inhalation of essential oils heightens the senses and can trigger numerous desired responses in the body. Use a cold mist diffuser to disperse the oils in a micro-fine vapour into the air to ensure full benefits. I love to diffuse lavender and Cedarwood Oils to promote a restful night sleep, R.C a Young Living blend to support my respiratory system or lemon and peppermint to give me an energy boost. *Topical application, is where you rub Essential Oils directly onto the skin diluting with a pure vegetable oil such as olive or almond see specific label for dilution ratio

By Caroline Lynch.

Exclusive distributor for Young Living

I love using Young Living’s Thieves blend to support my immune system, Clarity sage and Progression plus on the specific Vita flex point nightly to balance my hormone levels.

*Ingestion; only ingest Essential oils that have been tested and labeled suitable as a food supplement for example Young Livings Plus Oils. I like to detox with a drop of lemon oil in my water in the morning. These oils add a splash of refreshing flavour why not try a drop of tangerine in your gin!

62 |

HEALTHY HABITS

BY CELINE GIRARD

|INTEGRATIVE NUTRITION & HOLISTIC HEALTH COACH|

63 |

Rocking Energy and High Productivity & Performance

HOW TO NURTURE YOUR BODY FROM MORNING TO EVENING

-Wake up early. 5 AM has been proven many

4/ Healthy Foods

times that it is a great time to wake up. - One example is : 1/ Drink water

Hot water + squeezed lemon for cleansing. Green juice for nutrients.

2/ Properly wake up your mind

Avo toast with toasted whole grain bread topped by a squeezed lemon and hemp seeds

- No phones: be strong!

for the healthy fats.

- Quiet time in silence: meditation, centering

- Snacks :

your energy, set your intention for the day,

Walnuts for the healthy fats.

give a direction to your day. Especially for

Blueberries for brain functions & for the

people who work from home.

memory. Apples for the energy.

- Foods that help the brain to wake up sharp: healthy fats like fish oils, avo, nuts.

- In general : Eating raw will bring you more energy, you

3/ Properly wake up your body

won’t need to take a nap after a raw meal.

- Cold shower

Eating slowly will prevent you from eating too much and feel bloated.

- Stretch, workout, dance, move… you want to be alert, not stay in that foggy unawake state.

Ditching processed food and reducing meat will make your meals much lighter and easier for your body to digest so it will take much less energy to digest and you will have more energy left for focus and work. |

64 |

5/ Down to business: set up the right environment - If you work from home, ask yourself: where do I feel like working today ? in the kitchen, living room, office, coffee place? - Use essential oils to lift your energy up. Diffuse or put on : lemon, wild orange, grapefruit, peppermint. - Put on some quiet relaxing music or binaural beats -Have water next to you. - Turn off your phone and put it away from your sight. - Create awareness and get into your working mode energy. Take 30 seconds to center your energy and tell yourself: I am going to work, I am getting in to my working, productive energy. It is important to shift your energy, you don’t want to bring that Yin, loving, quiet energy at work. At work you want to be Yang, masculine, driven, go go go. Bring awareness to shift to your energy consciously. 6/ Down to business: practicalities - Get back to your intention/direction of the day and set up your to do list for the day - Close down all the tabs. When your eyes wonder, they get stressed at the sight of all those things you want to read, things you need to do. You lose your focus. - If you want to message/call someone, have a notebook next to you to write it down and when you are done with work you send all your messages at the same time. Don’t get distracted or don’t stop what you do when you are in the flow. - Set up a fixed time to answer emails & social media, set a timer 50 minutes and do only that. - Do one thing at a time, quit multitasking. Focus on one thing at a time and give it your best. Awareness. - Put alarms to take breaks. Meditation, quick nap, stretching, snack.

65 |

7/ Productivity is boosted by creativity - Go for a walk daily. Clears up your mind, helps to let go of worries. - Have one full day off per week. No work related activities, gives your brain a rest and let creativity pop in. - Give yourself breaks from social media once a week. A full day or half day with your phone turned off. 8/ Evening: Disconnect & Winding Down - Have boundaries. After a certain time, no more work. Define a time and stick to it. Close your computer, put your phone on airplane mode. Set up an alarm. If people call or message, it is a NO, you are done for today, it will wait tomorrow. Respect yourself & your family. - Prepare your next day. Right down what you want to get done the next done. Whatever you have in your mind, right it down to get it out of your mind. Let go of the day to preserve your energy. - Change your energy. Get back into that Yin, the mother, the girlfriend, the wife. You don’t want to bring your Yang go go go in the kitchen or with your kids. You want to be loving and feminine. Awareness around changing activities & energy. 9/ Evening: Winding Down The better your sleep, the greater your energy the next day. Quote from Arianna Huffington. - Set up a time to get into your bedroom/bathroom/ done for the day. Go to bed alarm. - Lower the lights/salt lamps: eyes & mind to relax. - Relaxing activities for your mind and body. Stretching, yoga, meditation, relaxing music, bath, hot shower, massage. - Diffuse lavender essential oil to calm down, and fall asleep easily |

66 |

CELINE GIRARD

HEALTH COACH

If you want to get onboard... I hope you are ready, because I am going to rock you ! The program is the following one... CLEAN NUTRITION Improve your diet & lose weight to fabulously healthy

Holistic Health & Nutrition Coach.

ROCKING ENERGY Change your daily habits & boost your energy to rock your goals and career

~ Change diet & lose weight

REJUVENATING SLEEP

~ Change habits & boost energy

Improve your sleep & increase your productivity to achieve your dreams

~ Improve sleep & increase productivity ~ Clarify your values and

MEANINGFUL RELATIONSHIPS Clarify your values & strengthen your relationships to create meaningful and deep coneccions.

strengthen your relationships

It’s either a hell yes or a clear no ! Céline

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We All Scream for JUICES!

JUICING FOR YOUR HEALTH HEALTHY JUICES RECIPE BY JEN GAGNON; Holistic Health Coach and Marconics Practitioner.

Note: Please note that the following recipes will yield about 40 ounces

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Benefits of each ingredient: Pineapple: Contains Vitamin C and betacarotene. These antioxidants can help with the overall health of our skin.Contains bromeliad which is anti inflammatory, packed with manganese which protects our cells from free radicals. It also contains vitamin B & folate which are good for our cardiovascular health. It's got potassium that helps regulate your blood pressure! Celery: Contains impressive amounts of vitamin C which is great for our immunune system and k, good for general bone & heart health, as well as folate and potassium. Celery contains bioactive flavonoids which could help to fight and prevent cancer cells. It has also been found to have antiinflammatory properties which can help with acid reflux, bloating, IBS, constipation, acne, eczema, and other inflammation issues in the body. Lemon: Loaded with vitamin C, great for our immune system. Lemon helps our bodies absorb iron more efficiently reducing risks of anemia. Pectin found in lemons helps improve gut health and the digestion of sugars and starches. Cucumber: Cucumber boosts your metabolism, relieves constipation, boosts our immunity system due it’s minerals, hormones and compounds. Cucumber is great at removing toxins. May help reduce stress and boost your energy.

PURA VIDA INGREDIENTS 1 Pineapple 8 celery Stalks 1 lemon peeled 1 cucumber 4-5 large kale leaves 3 large chard leaves 2” ginger nub.

Kale: The superfood of this world ;). Kale is loaded with vitamins and minerals. • Vitamin A: 206% of the DV (from beta-carotene) Vitamin K: 684% of the DV Vitamin C: 134% of the DV Vitamin B6: 9% of the DV Manganese: 26% of the DV Calcium: 9% of the DV Copper: 10% of the DV Potassium: 9% of the DV Magnesium: 6% of the DV It also contains 3% or more of the DV for vitamin B1 (thiamin), vitamin B2 (riboflavin), vitamin B3 (niacin), iron and phosphorus It also contains quercetin and kamepferol which are powerful antioxidants. Antioxidants are substances that help counteract oxidative damage by free radicals in the body. It is a good plant-based source of calcium, a nutrient that is very important for bone health and plays a role in all sorts of cellular functions. It is also a decent source of magnesium, an incredibly important mineral that most people don't get enough of. Eating plenty of magnesium may be protective against type 2 diabetes and heart disease. Chard: Chard contains 3 times the recommended daily intake of vitamin K and 44 percent of the recommended amount of vitamin A. This vegetable is thought to help combat cancer, reduce blood pressure, and enhance performance in sports. Loaded with vitamin K which is known to help reduce risks of osteoporosis. Ginger: Ginger has a very long history of use in various forms of traditional/alternative medicine. It has been used to help digestion, reduce nausea and help fight the flu and common cold, to name a few. Gingerol is the main bioactive compound in ginger, responsible for much of its medicinal properties. It has powerful anti-inflammatory and antioxidant effects .In one study, consuming 2 grams of ginger per day, for 11 days, significantly reduced muscle pain in people performing elbow exercises. There is also some evidence that ginger can enhance brain function directly. In a study of 60 middle-aged women, ginger extract was shown to improve reaction time and working memory.

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BLUEBERRY GINGER AID

Benefits of each ingredient: Blueberries: Blueberries are among the most nutrient-dense berries. Blueberries are believed to have one of the highest antioxidant levels of all common fruits and vegetables. The antioxidants in blueberries are strongly linked to reduced levels of oxidized LDL. This makes blueberries very good for your heart. According to animal studies, the antioxidants in blueberries may affect areas of your brain that are essential for intelligence. Research suggests that anthocyanins in blueberries have beneficial effects on insulin sensitivity and glucose metabolism. These anti- diabetes effects occur with both blueberry juice and extract.

INGREDIENTS 2 cups of blueberries 7-8 celery stalks 1 large cucumber 1 lemon peeled 1” ginger nub

Cucumber: Cucumber boosts your metabolism, relieves constipation, boosts our immunity system due it’s minerals, hormones and compounds. Cucumber is great at removing toxins. May help reduce stress and boost your energy.

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e s i o n e h t ! l l n i a g t u n i o t b t A nd fi a

THE COMPARISON GAME be yourself...stop trying to fit in!

Written by

SILKE KRETZSCHMAR

ANIMAL LOVER CHILD OF NATURE LOVE BOOKS, MUSIC AND ALL THOSE ARTY THINGS PLANET EARTH IS MY HOME, CURRENT STATION IS LISBON, PORTUGAL CURRENTLY WRITING MY FIRST SELF-HELP BOOK

THEFERALCHILD.HOME.BLOG OR @THEFERALCHILDBLOG ON FACEBOOK

Do you feel at times as if you just can't keep up with all the social pressure out there? No matter what and how much you are doing and trying, you're always behind? And then when we do open up about our worries and confide in someone, there are these people who affectionately give you the advice that you should stop comparing yourself to others and the easiest ways to do it is to spend less time on social media and to stop reading the news altogether? Yeah, yeah, if it only were that easy, we're past the stone age where people lived in caves. And besides this, we are human and we have a desire to connect and to communicate, some perhaps more so than others, but communication does not only exist on a verbal level, right?

Taking up this advice though, to stop comparing yourself to others - this part is indeed essential. And it feels like a no-brainer really, and yet we're still doing it, consciously and subconsciously. And I daresay, that under today's circumstances, this is expected. Everything is categorized. Small, Medium, Large. But what about those inbetweeners? We fit into sort of a Small but it's a little tight, and the Medium feels comfy for a day at home where nobody sees us... We don't always fit right in, and in this case, our clothes tell us that something's wrong with us. Darling, no matter what, if you keep trying to fit in, by the time you really do, the next thing will appear right at your ally. So, don't worry about it another minute.

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You can't stop people sharing their opinion. It's their right. Nor would I suggest, that you should completely shut yourself out from this beautiful globalized pool of opportunities that lies out there. However, you can decide how much voice you give these critics, and how much energy and attention you give it. It's biology, really. The more you feed and fertilize something, the more it grows and nurtures. And if you're letting all these negative vibes take the better of you, you are nurturing the negative self-image. I feel so sorry for all those inner children, who are not allowed a voice, because people are scared that they won't fit in.

DARLING, NO MATTER WHAT, IF YOU KEEP TRYING TO FIT IN, BY THE TIME YOU REALLY DO, THE NEXT THING WILL APPEAR RIGHT AT YOUR ALLY... SO, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT ANOTHER MINUTE. silke kretzschmar

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"THE NOISE OUT THERE WILL NEVER GO AWAY. IT'S UP TO YOU, ON HOW MUCH VOLUME YOU WILLING TO GIVE IT" I'm not saying, you should be rebellious. I'm not saying, you should start a fight. This would sort of mean, that you are joining the raids. Personally, I feel that if we collect our strength through a calm, gather our thoughts, make our mind powerful again, this is it. Once you reach the point where you can listen to all the “jazz” out there and are able to reflect and decide that you do not want to give it your time or attention, nor your energy, you are free and you are untouchable. I could say, that this would mean, that you are now finally a step ahead of the rest, but since this is not a race, nor do we want to get back into this stupid comparison game, that we just got out of and changed the rules for. No. You blasted the framework. And by doing so, you opened up an entirely new path. One, that only you are on. One where you can finally compare yourself to you and yourself alone. Here, you are finally able to flourish, because you are free and accountable to yourself.

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SR LE

L o ev

s u r

F L SE

"LET'S BE REASONABLE AND ADD AN EIGHT DAY TO THE WEEK THAT IS DEVOTED EXCLUSIVELY TO READING" lena dunham REBECCA CROSS, BUSINESS SUCCESS AND MOTIVATIONAL STRATEGIST Rebecca Cross is a kickass award-winning Business Success and Motivational Strategist, Best Seller Author and serial entrepreneur. She currently runs two businesses - a property business, and a mentoring and coaching business which are heading towards a combined turnover of half a million dollars. Rebecca's positive mindset and attitude has enabled her to plough through life and beat the odds. She has huge determination, tenacity, and resilience that stems from her childhood of foster care, addiction, and overcoming a reading age of 7 when she was 14 years old. As a Motivational Map Business Practitioner, NLP (neuro-linguistic programming) Practitioner, and Theta Healing Practitioner, Rebecca not only mentors and coaches nearly 100 VAs worldwide, but also motivates and inspires hundreds of women in her global Facebook community 'Stepping into Greatness'. Her message is that with accountability and support (if needed) they can achieve anything they put their mind to. A mum-of-three and a keen runner, Rebecca's lifelong mission is to help two million women to step into their greatness. She totally believes in authentic and no bull sh#t business strategies and loves to build and work with budding entrepreneurs who are at the beginning of their business journey. |

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Contact: Website: http://www.rebeccacrossltd.com Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/7952663939 86875/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rebeccaanncross/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rebecca-crosssteppingintogreatness/

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FAVORITE

Sum me r read ings ! BEST SELLERS AND UPCOMING BOOKS!

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UNCHAIN YOUR INNER STRENGTH

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