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Making students
FEEL SAFE: Schools prioritize bullying education
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BY MELISSA L. TICHAUER
hile educators teach math, reading and social studies during the school year, anti-bullying policies and lessons have also catapulted to the top of curricula in Florida schools. In 2008, Florida passed the “Jeffrey Johnston Stand Up for All Students Act” to prohibit the bullying or harassment of a student or employee of a public K-12 education institution in the state. Broward County was the first to implement the policy. Several years later, schools throughout Florida are putting a major emphasis on bullying prevention to make sure students and teachers feel safe and protected. Bullying is defined as systematically and chronically inflicting physical hurt or psychological distress on students or employees, and it includes cyberbullying. The acronym R.I.P. (Repeated, Imbalance of power and Purposeful) is used to help identify the behavior. Even though each school district has its own specific measures and resources in place, the underlying theme of zero tolerance is paramount in all of them. Broward County Public Schools use the “ABC’s of Bullying Prevention” book, which contains three bullying prevention lessons for every grade level and is designed to be taught annually. “Each grade lesson is different but contains the essential concepts regarding bullying that students must understand in order for their Attitude and Behavior to Change: Attitude + Behavior = Change,” said Tresha Fletcher, a program specialist in the Broward Schools’ Diversity, Cultural Outreach and Prevention Department. “We want all students to respect each other and feel safe and protected in school, in addition to making sure they have a trusted adult to speak to if they feel bullied or know someone being bullied.” Miami-Dade County Public Schools require five curriculum lessons on bullying and violence preven-
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tion per grade level Pre-K through 12 on preventing, identifying and responding to bullying and/or harassment. In addition, Miami-Dade schools also use Bullying Prevention Train-the-Trainer professional developments, the Student Voices program, the Elementary TRUST (To Reach Ultimate Success Together) Curriculum and the Anti-Defamation League’s “No Place for Hate” initiative. “The Miami-Dade County Public Schools bullying policy aligns with the state’s model policy,” said Deborah A. Montilla, district director of the Division of Student Services. “We recognize that to effectively address the issue of bullying, a multifaceted approach beginning with the re-culturing of the school environment is essential with the involvement of all stakeholders.” While Palm Beach County uses Universal Guidelines that can be customized by each school to teach about respect, responsibility and kindness, it also has a Single School Culture Initiatives website designed to provide tools for administrators, counselors and teachers to use social mistakes as opportunities to learn. “We recognize that simply telling students about the Universal Guidelines is a good first step, but people are still going to make social mistakes,” said Kim Mazauskas, the Bullying Prevention and Intervention Coordinator for the district. “We also recognize that parents are wonderful social coaches for their children and designate learning tools for parents to use to help their children respond to difficult social situations.” Each school district’s website outlines their individual initiatives and programs, including special days of observance, curriculum, video galleries and training modules to help educate parents and students on bullying prevention. Some of the key observances include Choose Peace and Stop Violence week in September, National Bullying Prevention Month in October, Broward’s Anti-Bullying week in November, No Name Calling week in January, and a Day of Silence in April. Broward middle schools also collaborate with the Broward Sheriff’s Office to educate students on cyberbullying with the “Think B4 U Post” Campaign. “We have seen that with more education, there has been a definite decrease in the number of bullying referrals,” Fletcher said. “It’s not only about anti-bullying, it’s about violence prevention in general. It’s about teaching character throughout the year and about building relationships with the students.” David Sherman, a youth mentor with Broward Schools, is familiar with bullying intervention. He went through some difficult times during his
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childhood with teasing and bullying, inspiring him to become part of the prevention program. “Being bullied can change the course of a child’s life in a negative direction for a very long time, and the damage from bullying can be devastating to a child,” said Sherman, who is a health and life coach. “Having two sons of my own increased my sensitivity to what kids go through, and I wanted to help kids find their voice and self-worth. Schools are becoming increasingly aware of the epidemic and are definitely trying to do their part.” Sherman says schools recognize the effects of bullying and are getting outside organizations to lecture on the subject and bringing in professionals to assist children in a one-on-one setting. “Bullying shatters confidence and self-esteem,” said Sherman, who uses various techniques to help children focus on turning negatives into positives and control their emotions. “With the various ways that a child can be bullied, we really must catch this sort of thing as early as possible and figure out ways to build a child’s self-esteem to combat and fight off this negativity. There is no bully without a victim.” Lowell Levine, the founder and president of the nationally recognized Stop Bullying Now Foundation in North Palm Beach, said bullying is now considered the worst epidemic in the country, with millions of children reportedly being bullied each year. “The most important point that we can instruct all children is that if they are being bullied or know of someone being bullied, to address the problem with an adult as soon as possible, whether it’s a teacher, guidance counselor, principal or a parent,” said Levine, who works with schools and lectures at local venues to help eradicate bullying. Levine, a professional motivational speaker, has helped many parents and children. “Our education to the adults of children K-12 is vital – very vital,” Levine said. “When we teach parents everything about bullying, it helps their child. Our theme is working, but more resources are needed to get the message out to everyone who has a child in K-12. The more the message is delivered, the bullying problem will see a decline.”
MORE INFORMATION Stop Bullying Now Foundation, Inc.: stopbullyingnowfoundation.org/main/ Also: browardprevention.org/violence/anti-bullying in Broward County studentservices.dadeschools.net/bullying in Miami-Dade County palmbeachschools.org/ssci/Bullying.asp in Palm Beach County
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Anti-bullying resources in South Florida THE HUMANITY PROJECT thehumanityproject.com 954-205-2722 The Humanity Project has programs and resources for students, parents and schools, including Anti-bullying Through The Arts, which teaches bystanders to stand up against bullying. The Project’s Thp4kids.com is a website for teens by teens featuring original artwork and poetry, and it includes helpful resources such as links, podcasts and videos.
NATIONAL VOICES FOR EQUALITY, EDUCATION AND ENLIGHTENMENT (NVEEE) www.nveee.org 954-561-2626 NVEEE works with schools and youth centers to teach bullying prevention to students, teachers and parents through customized workshops. NVEE also provides mentoring programs and leadership programs for students who want to teach others bullying prevention. NVEEE has offices in Broward and Palm Beach County.
NO PLACE FOR HATE Anti-Defamation League regions.adl.org/florida/programs/adl-npfh-fl.html No Place for Hate is a program developed by the Anti-Defamation League to help schools support individual and group differences. The program is school-focused and requires up to 30 students or teachers to lead the school in three school-wide activities to change the school’s culture about bullying and become a “No Place for Hate” school. No Place for Hate has also partnered with United Way of Broward, the Miami Coalition of Christians and Jews (MCCJ), University of Miami and several cities in Miami-Dade and Broward counties.
ADDITIONAL RESOURCES Bullying.org Bullying.org is dedicated to increasing the awareness of bullying and to preventing, resolving and eliminating bullying in society. PacerKidsAgainstBullying.org A fun, interactive website with videos, coloring sheets and tutorials to help kids learn to recognize and stand against bullying. www.commonsensemedia.org/cyberbullying Cyberbullying, whether it’s done online or over a cell phone, can affect kids of any age. Find age-appropriate guidelines, videos, and articles to help with tough conversations -- whether your kid is a bully or is being bullied. StopBullying.gov A federal government website managed by the U.S.
SAFE SCHOOLS SOUTH FLORIDA safeschoolssouthflorida.org 954-771-4799 or 305-576-2126 Safe Schools South Florida is a nonprofit with a mission to teach respect for all regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity in schools. The organization works with the educators of schools and holds training programs to show those involved in youth support what they can do to provide a safer school environment. Safe School also holds youth conferences to explore bullying prevention programs.
SUNSERVE www.sunserve.org or 954-764-5150 SunServe is a social service agency that provides youth services, connects teens to peer counseling and provides successful adult role models for LGBTQ youths. Services include counseling, support groups and other resources. SunServe has multiple locations in South Florida and parents can go on the website for the closest location.
BULLYING AND THE LAW www.bullyingandthelaw.org Bullying and the Law, sponsored by Walser Law Firm, is a free, online anti-bullying and cyberbullying program developed by Nova Southeastern University. Its goal is to make bullying and cyberbullying laws “common knowledge.” Students and schools can go online and look up Florida’s anti-bullying law and civil rights and harassment law as well as videos showing the consequences of breaking these laws. — Compiled by Maddy Mesa
Department of Health & Human Services with features and videos that define bullying and what you can do about it. ToThisDayProject.com Spoken word poet Shane Koyczan wrote a poem called “To This Day” about the effects of bullying and put it online with illustrations from 86 artists, creating a viral video that has won numerous awards and touched the lives of millions of people. ed.ted.com/featured/p04GkF0j TedEd (Lessons Worth Sharing) on the “To This Day” project: Find out how bullying touches us all and get involved so that you can help stop bullying in your community and around the world. Bullyingstatistics.org Information on preventing bullying, harassment, online/social bullying, and school bullies.
Fact: Other kids are watching 85 percent of the time when one kid bullies another kid. Adults like teachers or parents hardly ever see a bully being mean to someone else. Words hurt. All forms of bullying are harmful, but VERBAL bullying, including name-calling, happens more often than any other kind of bullying. Fact: Most kids feel uncomfortable witnessing bullying, but very few intervene. Most of the time, when peers step in, the bullying stops within 10 seconds. — Bullying.org SOUTH FLORIDA PARENTING • ANTI-BULLYING GUIDE
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What to expect: Making a bullying complaint By Melissa L. Tichauer
While all parts of anti-bullying prevention are critical, the key point is to know how to report incidents of bullying behavior, according to Tresha Fletcher, a program specialist in the Broward County Public Schools’ Diversity, Cultural Outreach and Prevention Department.
Broward County’s processes are similar to other school districts:
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Each school must have an Anonymous Reporting Box at their single point of entry. It is recommended the box double as a “shout out” box to celebrate positive student interactions as well. Victims, teachers and bystanders can report bullying incidents. Reports can also be made through anonymous online forms, by calling anonymous tip hotlines, or to any public school employee. Once a report is made, schools use trained investigators to determine the appropriate course of action and follow up.
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Parents are notified in writing and/or by telephone of the complaint and the investigative process. In cases of student-to-student schoolbased bullying, the investigation may include the principal as well as the investigator. The principal or appropriate district administrator shall begin a thorough investigation with the alleged victim and accused within two school days of receiving a complaint. The Florida Department of Education requires that school administrators provide immediate notification to the parents of both the target and the alleged perpetrator of an act of bullying or harassment.
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Documented interviews of the alleged target, alleged perpetrator and witnesses are conducted privately and separately and are confidential. To protect anonymity, the name of the complainant is not revealed. The school investigator then determines whether the reported act of bullying or harassment is within the scope of the district school system.
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Within 10 school days of the complaint, there shall be a written decision by the Principal or appropriate district administrator. The principal/administrator will decide the validity of the complaint and any corrective action, if applicable, consistent with the Discipline Matrix. The principal/administrator will inform all relevant parties in writing of the decision and the right to appeal.
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No retaliation of any kind is permitted in connection with an individual’s bullying complaint, and if it occurs, it shall be deemed an additional act of bullying.
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School-based intervention and assistance may include, but is not limited to: counseling and
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support to address the needs of the targets of bullying, the bystanders, and the students who bully; assistance and support for parents; and evaluation of school culture with recommendations aimed at increasing peer ownership and support. For parents who disagree with the outcome of the investigation, the appeal process has three layers up to the superintendent. If the bullying continues, the severity of the consequences increase, and local municipalities are called. If students continue to experience bullying, they are encouraged to continue to report the bullying behavior to a trusted adult. If the bullying occurs off-campus, parents can call the police.
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Various Reporting Methods by County MIAMI-DADE COUNTY REPORTING POLICY Every school site is required to have an Anonymous Bullying Reporting Box available for staff, students, parents or visitors, should individuals wish to make an anonymous report.
There are several ways in which bullying may be reported: Bullying and Harassment Anonymous Tip Hotline: 305-995-CARE Online: tipsubmit.com/WebTips.aspx?AgencyID=698 School-site Bullying Reporting Boxes
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BROWARD COUNTY REPORTING POLICY Anonymous Reporting Box: Each school must have an Anonymous Reporting Box at its single point of entry.
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Call 754-321-0911. Email school911@browardschools.com Text to CRIMES 274637. Message MUST begin with SBBC.
PALM BEACH COUNTY REPORTING POLICY: 211 hotline for anonymous reporting: 211palmbeach.org
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In addition, Palm Beach County’s school district requires posting of anonymous reporting lines and access to the Bullying and Harassment Report at every school site; procedures for reporting and investigation; notification to parents/guardians of both accused/offenders and targets/victims; counseling services and outside resources for both the targets/victims and the accused/offenders and their families; and the implementation of PBSD Forms designed to record the details of the report and provide documentation showing the actions taken, remediation and consequences issued.
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Sibling rivalry can escalate to bullying if not stopped MELISSA L. TICHAUER
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hile not as prevalent as in the schoolyard, a form of bullying labeled “sibling bullying” is causing strife in family households. Often mistaken as the sibling rivalry present in most families, this form of bullying has taken basic brother and sister squabbles to the next level, leaving parents in a quandary. Susan Glatzer, a licensed clinical social worker in Coral Springs, said the intensity of sibling bullying is usually in direct proportion to other stressors going on in the home, and it is often caused by what parents are doing or not doing with their children. This is seen most often in cases where families are going through a divorce and children may take opposing sides, in homes where substance/physical abuse issues are present, or in families where one child has special needs and requires more attention. In one of her cases, Glatzer worked with siblings dealing with their parents’ crumbling marriage. Each of them took a different parent’s side, causing constant friction and fighting between the two. “It’s usually the parents, although not intentionally, who create this problem,” Glatzer said. “In cases with parents in difficult or ending marriages, they must ensure they are getting their own needs taken care of so they are not inadvertently using their children for emotional support and, in turn, causing rifts between their children. When one parent uses a child as a confidant, this sets the other kids up to harbor resentments.” In cases where a family has a special needs child, the other children frequently act out due to feelings of neglect or a lack of the attention that they see their sibling receiving. In these instances, it’s important that parents make sure all their children’s needs are being taken care of, including carving out special time with each child. Glatzer advocates counseling to address most family issues and said outside help should be sought when a parent has been unsuccessful in intervening and the bullying ceases to stop. In more severe cases involving abuse or mental health issues, sending one of the children away for help to deal with their issues could be the only option if they cannot co-exist with others in the home. In one particular family Glatzer worked with, a sister with substance abuse and mental health issues became so violent with her sibling that she had to be sent out of state for treatment. Another family sought Glatzer’s help for their 13-year-old, who was dealing with depression. She found the parents were allowing the older siblings to use that child as a scapegoat to overshadow the larger issue of their father’s alcoholism.
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In that case, the mother became the enabler and the siblings were empowered to make the 13-yearold the target, verbally and emotionally abusing their younger sibling to the point of becoming suicidal. The most important thing parents need to recognize is which behaviors go beyond basic sibling rivalry, paying particular attention to any violence between children. Engaging in lying and destructive behaviors are also signs that something significant may be going on between siblings. “If a child goes to a parent and says their sibling is doing something, the parent needs to pay attention and listen to them,” Glatzer said. “The worst thing to do is ignore and dismiss it. While it is the child who is perpetrating these behaviors and needs counseling, it is likely the entire family dynamic that needs to be addressed in therapy.” Counseling can be a good resolution, especially if it’s family counseling or counseling in pairs to build bonds between family members, Glatzer said. She also advocates all-inclusive family time to build the support needed. Parents can contact local agencies such as Henderson Behavioral Health (hendersonbh.org), a nonprofit behavioral healthcare system in Broward and Palm Beach counties, to get help and resources for dealing with household issues.
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DON’T BE A BULLY contest winners Anti-bullying campaign brought to you by
South Florida Parenting invited readers of all ages to join us in taking a stand against bullying by creating artwork to display at our 2014 Back To School events. The first 100 entrants each received an annual Kids Fun Pass, and the entries below were chosen as winners.
Best Overall By Brandon Cruz
Best Design First Place By Ailish Donoho
Best Design Second Place By Luanna Ruiz-Rossi
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Best Message By Brittney Prophete
Best Palm Beach County By Yosleyni Pena
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We
? O D S T N E R S FROM BULLYING A P N A C T A WH ED TO HELP PROTECT YOUR KID STAY INVOLV
BY MADDY MESA Forum Publishing Intern
Bullying is no longer limited to the schoolyard. It might start at school, but with texting and social media, students can’t escape from the attention and comments of their peers. Cyberbullying is growing, and parents are struggling to find the balance of protector and snoop. Parents who suspect cyberbullying can track their child’s activities with certain apps and com-
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puter software, but it should be done discreetly, said Sameer Hinduja, Ph.D, the co-director of the Cyberbullying Research Center and a professor in the School of Criminology and Criminal Justice at Florida Atlantic University. The first step is talking with your children, he said. “Establish that all rules for interacting with
SOUTH FLORIDA PARENTING • ANTI-BULLYING GUIDE
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LET’S BUILD… We’re fighting to keep our communities free from bigotry and hate.
We can speak out against prejudice and discrimination. We will seek to understand our differences and similarities. We believe that everyone deserves to be treated with respect and that no one should stand by when it comes to opposing hate.
www.adl.org/florida The No Place For Hate® Initiative in the Florida Region was developed to organize schools and communities to work together and develop activities that enhance the appreciation of diversity and foster harmony amongst diverse groups. It empowers schools and communities to promote respect for individual and group differences while challenging name-calling, bullying, prejudice and bigotry. Steps to Become a No Place for Hate® School 1. Participate in one ADL program chosen from the Request for ADL Education Training Form located at www.noplaceforhate.org
2. ADL recommends a coalition of students and educators to oversee the initiative’s implementation. Consider inviting parents and community members to join. 3. In order to receive the designation, the school must complete three school-wide activities that promote the message of the training received. 4. Submit the Activity Fulfillment Form with possible dates for the No Place For Hate® banner designation ceremony to the ADL. Every day we make choices. We can choose to let anti-Semitism, racism, name-calling and other forms of bigotry go unchallenged and potentially escalate, or we can choose to confront the bias that we see in our workplaces, homes, schools, and communities. As our schools become more diverse it is critical to actively build bridges to crosscultural understanding and mutual respect. For more information, please contact ADL’s Florida Regional Office at (561) 988-2900 or www.adl.org/florida
621 NW 53rd Street, Suite 450 Boca Raton, FL 33487 www.adl.org/florida
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people in real life also apply for interacting online or through cell phones. Convey that cyberbullying inflicts harm and causes pain in the real world as well as in cyberspace,” he said. But parents should do more than talk. “Monitor your child’s activities while they are online,” he said. “This can be done informally (through active participation in, and supervision of, your child’s online experience – which we recommend first and foremost) and formally (through software/apps, which we recommend when there have been repeated violations of trust, or in order to collect evidence).” His advice comes with a warning. “Use discretion when covertly spying on your kids. This could cause more harm than good if your child feels their privacy has been violated. They may go completely underground with their online behaviors and deliberately work to hide their actions from you.” Instead, he said, “Cultivate and maintain an open, candid line of communication with your children so that they are ready and willing to come to you whenever they experience something unpleasant or distressing in cyberspace. Victims of cyberbullying (and the bystanders who observe it) must know for sure that the adults who they tell will intervene rationally and logically and not make the situation worse.”
Stay involved Parents should participate in their child’s school life through elementary, middle and high school, said Jowharah Sanders, executive director of National Voices for Equality, Education and Enlightenment (NVEEE). “Parents should become more involved in their children’s school lives,” Sanders said. “The important thing is to make sure you are regularly talking to teachers, even if there is no problem, to find out how your child is doing both behavioral and educational.” “Also get [children] involved in extracurricular actives,” Sanders said. “If they are being bullied, it helps them not to dwell on it and gives them some friends to talk to. Keep them busy.” Sanders said parents have the right to know the passwords of all their children’s devices. “Because kids are trying to establish themselves as young adults, they aren’t going to go to their parents about their problems,” Sanders said. “As a parent, it is your job to check cell phones and laptops. However, even if you take it away, kids still have access to the Internet through school and at their friend’s house.” Sanders suggests using a keystroke program or
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other means to monitor a child’s Internet and cell phone actives, but not to make it into a big deal or even tell them about it. “Spend time with your kids and let them know you are here for them,” Sanders said. “If they see you’re not judgmental, then they are more likely to come to you when they do have a problem.”
Use tech as a tool One way parents can help their child, or encourage them to help others, is through the STOPit app. The app, available for Apple and Android devices, allows victims and bystanders of bullying to screen-capture the evidence and anonymously send it to a pre-selected trusted adult or school or law enforcement official. STOPit, FRIENDit and REPORTit buttons allow for the capturing of evidence and empower bystanders to stand up to bullying when they see it happening. There is also a HELPit button, which connects victims to a national crisis-support network any time of the day. “STOPit for individuals is where parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, kids can download the app and can start making a difference right away,” STOPit founder Todd Schobel said. “You don’t have to have a child to understand this problem; look at your niece or nephew. “Download it on your child’s phone; capture the evidence and stop it before it grows out of control,” he said.
A criminal act There are greater consequences now for kids who bully, and everyone involved - from the child to the parents - should be aware of the consequences. “Probably the biggest and most important for both students and parents to understand is that minors can and are arrested and charged,” said Daryl Hulce, head of Bullying and the Law, a free high school anti-bullying and cyberbullying program developed at Nova Southeastern University. The project, at bullyingandthelaw.org, is designed to test students’ knowledge on Florida’s bullying and cyberbullying laws. Not every case of bullying ends with such an extreme punishment as arrest or criminal record, Hulce said. “It seems most cases end with a lesser penalty, such as community service and some sort of educational training,” Hulce said. “But this doesn’t reduce the monetary cost of defending the accused and the embarrassing publicity that goes along with the arrest.” The more parents know, he said, the more they can help their child, whether the bully or the bullied, from the damages of cyberbullying.
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1 in 4 kids
is bullied at school. tell a trusted adult
don’t give a bully an audience
set a good example be a friend, not a bully
Learn how to talk to your child about it. For more information about how adults and children can prevent bullying, visit StopBullying.gov.
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